English

Mr.Hill
Valentina Morelli 10a
03/23/1015
William Golding
The writer probably knows what he meant when he wrote a
book, but he should immediately forget what he meant when
he's written it. -William Golding
William Golding was an author very famous, he was born on
September 19 of 1911, in Saint Columb Minor, Cornwall,
England. This author is very well recognized because of his
first book, Lord of the Flies. It was his most acclaimed novel,
it is about a group of boys who where on a plane crash and
they then have to survived on a desert island.
Golding was raised by his parents, his mother, Mildred, was
a women who fought for womens right to vote, his father,
Alex, was a schoolmaster. William study at the same school
his father works, Marlborough Grammar School. At the age
of 12 years old, William couldnt write an essay ?are you
sure He was a frustrated kid, he found a way of having fun
and spreading (spending?) his time by bulling his peers, he
enjoyed hurting people, he said it*. The author attend
Brasenose College at Oxford University. (This sentence
doesnt seem to be doing anything or going anywhere?)
Alex, his father His father Alex, had the dream that some day
his son would become a scientist, but, he proved it wrong
William decides to study English literature(but he proved him
wrong by deciding to sounds more natural). In 1934 after

of his graduation he published his poetry book book of

poetry, it was a collection full of critics ??.
Eventually William liked to follow his father footsteps. In
1935 he start teaching at a Bishop Wordsworths school in
Salisbury. The experience of teaching boy was an inspiration
for his successful novel ??.....
In 1940 he temporarily abandoned his profession, and join
The Royal Navy and fight in World War II, he . He spend 6
years on a boat, where he developed a love for sailing and
the sea. During The World War II he fought on? battleships
at the sinking of Bismarck. After World War II had ended he
return to teach and write.
William Golding received the Nobel Prize of literature in
1983, and was knighted by the Queen Elizabeth in 1988.
The author passed the way at Perranarworthal, Cornwall.
Excellent opener!! Really grabbed my attention.
The organization of the biography is a little choppy and seems to jump
around. Next time you should try and plan the flow better.
Your sentence construction could do with some work in places.
You are also failing to correctly change to form of some words to match
the tense you use.
*He said that he enjoyed hurting people?? your sentence construction
there was a little strange.
Area
Task Response

high
fully addresses all parts of the task
presents a fully developed position in
answer to the question with relevant,
fully
extended and well supported ideas

Coherence and
Cohesion

uses cohesion in such a way that it

attracts no attention
skillfully manages paragraphing
uses a wide range of vocabulary
with very natural and
sophisticated control of lexical

Lexical Resource

low
barely responds to the
task
does not express a
position
may attempt to present
one or two ideas
but there is no
development
has very little control of
organizational
features
uses an extremely
limited range
of vocabulary;

20-0

Grade
12

20-0

17

20-0

16

features; rare minor errors occur

only as slips
Grammatical
Range and
Accuracy
Formatting

Paragraphs
Capitalization and
punctuation.

uses a wide range of structures with

full flexibility and accuracy; rare minor
errors occur only as slips
Emails have name, class, and title in
subject line.
Essay has a title, name, and class.
Other formatting guidelines are
followed.
Student uses paragraph structures.
Forming them correctly based around
subject
Student uses both competently and
fluidly.

essentially no
control of word
formation and/or
spelling
cannot use sentence
forms except in
memorized phrases
Student fails to use
formatting

20-0

14

10

10

Student fails to use

any form.

Student fails to use

any.
doesnt use sentence
structure

100-0

total
79