Phone Flirting

The Secret to Amazing

Phone Conversations with
Women

By Steve Scott

Table of Contents

Disclaimer.................................................................4
Introduction..............................................................5
The Goal of Phone Conversations................................10
Getting Your Number (The Right Way).........................16
The Timing of Your Phone Call....................................24
Phone Anxiety..........................................................29
5 Rules for Calling Women.........................................33
The Beginning of the Phone Call.................................40
The Middle of the Phone Call......................................44
The End of the Phone Call..........................................49
Phone Call Roadblocks and Obstacles..........................53
Conclusion...............................................................60

Text Guide

While all attempts have been made to verify the

information provided in this publication, neither the author
nor the publisher assumes any responsibility for errors,
omissions, or contrary interpretations of the subject matter
herein.
4
Disclaimer

No part of this publication may be reproduced or

transmitted in any form or by any means, mechanical or
electronic, including photocopying or recording, or by any
information storage and retrieval system, or transmitted by
email without permission in writing from the publisher.

This book is for entertainment purposes only. The views

expressed are those of the author alone, and should not be
taken as expert instruction or commands. The reader is
responsible for his or her own actions. The advice in this
book is meant for responsible adults, age 18 and over, and
is not meant for minors.

Adherence to all applicable laws and regulations, including

international, federal, state and local governing
professional licensing, business practices, advertising, and
all other aspects of doing business in the US, Canada or
any other jurisdiction is the sole responsibility of the
purchaser or reader.

Neither the author nor the publisher assume any

responsibility or liability whatsoever on the behalf of the
purchaser or reader of these materials.

Any perceived slight of any individual or organization is

purely unintentional.

5
Introduction

Have you ever felt like there is a set of rules and guidelines
about talking to women on the phone that are written in a
book that you have never seen or read. You notice your
friends and other guys seem to know what the dating rules
are but you are just left out in the cold.

While you may not know what

you need to do correctly when it
comes to women, there is little
room for doubt when it comes to
breaking the rules.
Either the girl will dump you, yell
at you or never answer your calls
again. The good news is that this
is the book that you have been
missing. This is the book that lets
in on the secret of phone
flirtation and rules.

Let start with an example of what I am talking about. Here

is a clip from the movie Swingers

Mike: So how long do I wait to call?

Trent: A day.

Mike: Tomorrow.

Sue: Tomorrow, then a day.

Trent: Yeah.

Mike: So two days?

Trent: Yeah, I guess you could call it that, two days.

Sue: Definitely, two days is like industry standard.

Trent: You know I used to wait two days to call anybody, but now
it's like everyone in town waits two days. So I think three days is
kind of money. What do you think?

Sue: Yeah, but two's enough not to look anxious.

Trent: Yeah, two's enough not to look anxious. But I think three
days is kind of money. You know because you...

Mike: Yeah, but you know what, maybe I'll wait 3 weeks. How's
that? And tell her I was cleaning out my wallet and I just
happened to run into her number.

Charles: Then ask her where you met her.

Mike: Yeah, I'll ask her where I met her. I don't remember. What
does she look like? And then I'll ask if we f**ked. Is that... would
that be... T, would that be the money?

Trent: You know what. Ha ha ha Mike, laugh all you want but if
you call too soon you might scare off a nice baby who's ready to
party.

Mike: Well how long are you guys gonna wait to call your babies?

Trent, Sue: Six days.

Can you see how complicated it can be sometimes. There

seems to be confusion about calling. Talk to ANY guy and
he ll give you his proven rules for calling women. Some
guys say call immediately; while others might say wait
three to four days.

So when should you call? Be patient and you will learn the
answer
So when should you call? Be patient and you will learn the
answer

Even
time
say?
Even
time
say?

if you get it right can call in the correct amount of

and get a woman on the phone, what should you
if you get it right can call in the correct amount of
and get a woman on the phone, what should you

For many guys, calling women is a very nerve-wracking

experience. Normally confident men don t understand how
to handle the phone when it comes to calling a woman, nor
do they know why it s important for their gameFor many guys, calling women is a ve
ry nerve-wracking
experience. Normally confident men don t understand how
to handle the phone when it comes to calling a woman, nor
do they know why it s important for their game.

As you begin to understand this

phone calling game, remember this:
with women you MUST be
proactive.

If you don t follow through with women, you might find

yourself alone a lot and spending lonely nights alone with
your cat. This is a sad, sad truth.

If you wait for her to call you will be extremely

disappointed, because she will NOT be the first to call.
Waiting around for her to do so will amount to watching
movies like 50 first dates alone. Your phone will remain
silent.

There are a couple of things to consider when talking about

phone calling a dating. The phone is a tool to call the girl.
It helps you to connect with the girl and so it is used more
than just a simple appointment making device.

Women place great significance on whether a guy calls

them or not. If you only call to make the date and do not
use it to communicate beyond that purpose, it can make
you seem desperate. Men s view of calling a girl is a more
Text Box:

with women you MUST be proactive.

8
practical one in contrast to women who have a more
emotional attachment to it.

Another thing to consider is that many women, especially

young ones, don t like making plans far into the future.
They don t want to commit themselves far in advance.

So calling about a date in two weeks is not usually very

productive. You may get the response of, call day before
to see if I m available.

Some of the reasons that this occurs is because women

want to be in control of the situation. They may be really
interested in a guy but want to keep their options open.
Planning too far in the future limits those options.

These unspoken rules may seem frivolous or too

complicated, but they are really easy to understand and
are very important if you want to secure that girl for more
than one date.

And that s what we re going to discuss! The RIGHT way to

talk to women over the phone.

Some of the topics that this guide covers are:

. Why it s important to develop your phone skills

. The goal for any phone conversation
. How to get a girl s number
. Rules for calling women
. How to overcome your nervousness before making a
call
. How to turn phone numbers into dates

9
. Handling problems with your phone calls

Like anything else in life, if you have the right tools, you
can accomplish anything. Knowing how to use a phone in
the right way will give a tool that will help your overall
success with women.

Phones may come with instructions about how to use their

functions, but they don t tell you what to say to the women.

This book is the guide that teaches you the phone

skills you need to succeed with women

10
The Goal of Phone Conversations

As I mentioned in the introduction a phone has two distinct

functions when it comes to calling women:
. Create attraction & rapport with a woman
. Set up dates

These may seem like easy goals but many guys forget
them when they pick up the phone to call a woman. They
have no idea what they want to accomplish as they are
dialing and so when a woman answers there can be a lot of
awkward conversation and silence.

Men are aware that women like to talk on the phone. They
spend hours on the phone, but never get done what they
really wanted to accomplish. This is because they lack
focus and a clear idea about what the goal of their call was.

The error is thinking that hours on the phone are needed

to build rapport and increase a woman s attraction and
attention.

The reality is that a man can accomplish incredible results

on the phone with only a few minutes of talking. The
trick is that you have to be focused and know to what
you re doing.

In order to accomplish a goal you must have the end in

mind. That is to say you must know what the goal is and
what it will look like when you have accomplished it.

In the beginning of this section I mentioned two goalscreating attraction/rapport with a woman and meeting her
in person for a date. Let s look at each of these goals
individually and in some more depth .

11

Recreating Attraction Recreating Attraction

Unless it s a blind date or cold call , you have already

made a connection with a woman. You already
accomplished your first goal which was to get her number.

You have already sparked some attraction with her. Since

she gave you her number she expects to hear from you.

Unless you called her from the parking lot of the bar you
may have met her at, there is a lapse of time between
when she gave you the number and when you actually call.

(It s not recommended that you call her from the parking
lot or she could think you some type of stalker.)

During the period of time

between giving you her
number and you calling her
back she has had stuff
happening in her life, dating
other guys, a busy social life,
or sports activities.

When you originally met her, she was excited and

interested in you. By the time you decide to call her she
may be distracted by other things. So your first goal upon
calling her to is to recreate this attraction she initially had.

You can t assume that a great first meeting will lead to her
falling madly in love with you and she has been laying next
to phone just waiting for you to call.

In that initial call, you have to work just as hard to rekindle

that attraction as you did when you first met. This is called
Text Box: During the period of time between giving you her number and you callin

g her back she has had stuff happening in her life

12
re-attraction. As you pick up that napkin with her
number scribbled in lipstick on it you must remember that
your goal is recreate that spark of interest that was
created when you first met her. You definitely want to
spark that interest before going out on a date.

Re-attraction can come in many forms. First you have to

fan the flames of attraction into life. At this stage you want
to make her comfortable with you. You can tease her in a
familiar manner and make her laugh. If you can make her
smile and laugh, you have caught her attention.

You also want to establish your high value. Being

high value is directly related to being a catch. In essence,
you know you have a lot to offer the world. It is for this
reason that you never give away your time or company for
free. It has to be earned. In other words, you re doing the
same FLIRTING routines that you would in person.

The next stage of reattraction you will want to work at is

making her work for YOUR attention. Instead of being at
her beck and call, you should act like you re the prize.

SHE has to make an effort if she wants YOUR attention. By

subtly demonstrating that you re the catch and she has to
work for you, you ll literally have a woman doing
everything she can to make a good impression with you.

While this might seem a bit Machiavellian, this is exactly

the thing that women do when they meet a guy. They get
them to buy their drinks, give compliments, or establish
physical contact. You re just turning the tables to your
favor.

In a relationship, no matter if it is a first date, or a couple

that has been married for 40 years, one of the partners is
pursuing the other. Now this may change from time to

13
time when pursuer becomes the pursued, but there is
always a chase. This is a natural order that keeps things
moving in a relationship and keeps it alive. Once the
pursuit is over, the relationship will wither and die.

I have been in relationships where I really wanted a girl. I

pursued her, dated her and then finally slept with her.
Once this occurred it was like something died. I was not as
attracted to her and she was not as attracted to me. This is
because the chase had ended. The hound finally caught the
fox. The excitement was no longer there.

So it s important to fan those flames. Have the girl in

hot pursuit of you and she will not stop. If you make
yourself the prize and dangle that prize just beyond her
reach like a carrot, you will drive her crazy trying to get
you.

One great routine that I ve discovered and implemented

into my own dating life is to steal their frame. When
you re in an interaction with a woman, assume the role of
being the one that is pursued. Have the mindset that all
her actions are done in an attempt to get you to notice her.

In fact, she s trying to get a date with you.

Another great trick is to accuse her of hitting on you

then try to move things forward towards a seduction. Sit
down and think of all the ways that women brush you off
or try to establish dominance, and start using them
yourself.

Most quality women are used to guys vying for their

attention. But it s rare to encounter a man who knows
what he wants and isn t afraid to screen women for these
qualities

14
And believe me; women do want a guy who demonstrates
that he is confident and one that has options.

Once you have recreated the attraction you will want to

work on your rapport with her. Keep in mind that meeting
a girl for a 2nd meeting or date is difficult.

You may be faced with competition from other guys. You

are asking the girl to set aside time for you which means
that during that time she is turning down guys that would
be less interesting.

Plus, there s the safety issue: She

has to trust that you re a normal
person and not some crazed maniac.

With rapport, you establish a sense

of familiarity and comfort with a
woman. Your goals when talking to her over the phone is
to develop a connection that she doesn t have with other
guys. You may need to take your time during this stage
and develop a sense of trust with her.

With women, it s actually better to move too slowly than

too fast. After all, who likes to be smothered?

As long as you re initiating the next step, it s never too

slow. If you noted carefully the things you can do to
maintain her interest, then she ll naturally pursue YOU.
And if she doesn t, don t take it personally.

The important thing to do is look long-term into the future.

Think of practicing the mating ritual as a stock that grows
and develops over time. Practice truly does make perfect,
but you must commit to the cause. Most people fail
because they re not willing to put in the time or effort.

Text Box: She has to trust that you re a normal person and not some crazed maniac.

15
The Date

Setting up a date should be the end goal of your phone

conversation. This should come after the reattraction and
rapport building.

If you go for the date up front, you may blow it. You want
to build the sexual tension until she will be literally begging
you for a date.

Sometimes it ll take one call to make a date but with some

women, it might take a few. Remember take it slow. If you
look too eager or desperate, then you will look like the one
pursing and she will be less interested in you.

No matter how long it takes, you want to maintain the

sexual tension that was created in person and over the
phone. This is the only way you ll be able to set up a date

To get to the point of setting up a date you must create

that sexual tension and rapport that will put her in the
RIGHT mindset to meet you. Later in this book you will
learn the RIGHT way to ask for the date. So be patient, it s
coming .

But here are some helpful pointers to consider along

the way.

. You must try to get her on the phone as soon as

possible. (Not in the parking lot, but maybe the next
couple days after you get her number) You don t want
to lose the sexual tension.
. It s up to you how long to wait, but the longer you wait,
the more you risk losing the attraction. Remember
there is competition from other guys to consider. You

16
do not want her to move on before you have the chance
to land a date.
. Don t fall for the wait to build interest game. Have the
mindset that they ARE interested and you re losing
nothing by calling them.
. You are competing for her time, so you have to stand
out.

Most first-time conversations get off to a boring start, but

you want to begin seducing her from your very first words.

Demonstrate through your choice of words that you have

an interesting life, and tease her by saying that she could
be a part of it. If she asks how your day went, tell her it
couldn t have been better.

Maintaining a busy lifestyle (or the illusion of one) is

exciting to women, as it poses you as being a challenge.

When asking her about her day, be choosy in how you

respond to her answers. If she says she s not bad or
okay, tell her (jokingly) that she s lame or boring.
This raises an immediate question about your life, making
her curious about what you do that s so exciting. As a
result, she ll desire to be part of your adventure.

Just remember that there are no free passes. She has to

earn her right to tag along.

17
Getting Her Number (The Right Way)Getting Her Number (The Right Way)

Getting a girls number opens the door to relationship. It

her signal to you that she is interested and that she would
like to meet and talk with you again.

Remember this about phone

numbers: the purpose is to set up a
date. A girl s number is not a
commodity, yet guys treat it this way.

Getting a girl s number is a chance to

take your introductory relationship to the next level.

Unless you are one of the lucky few, you won t be able to
physically progress the relationship anywhere when you
first meet.

The phone number is a CHANCE at a date; it should not be

seen as a foregone conclusion. She is handing you a tool in
order to meet her again in person. The fact is that could
lead to date OR it could lead to NOTHING at all.

It s all about how you use your chance and whether you
can rekindle that spark of interest.

Be a Real Person

To get a girl to give you her number, you have to establish

yourself as a real person who she would want to see again.

Your first conversation should make her see you as a real

person who can be part of her life. You must make her see
you as either as a potential lover OR a potential boyfriend.

Text Box:

the purpose [of phones] is to set up a date.

18

Before giving you her number, she has to imagine what it

would like to spend time with you. It s not just about
physical attraction; you must have an emotional attraction
to you as well.

If you can create a positive emotional attraction and

significant sexual tension, then it becomes easy to
set up a follow-up date. This is important because of
what I like to call chick psychology.

Chick Psychology

An attractive woman meets guys ALL the time. If she s

even remotely polite, she ll give out their number to lots of
guys. It is a game of chance. She increases her chances of
a date just by the sheer number of guys that she gives her
number to.

The downside is that because an attractive woman has

lots of guys on the hook, she has trouble remembering
who she s talking to. It s hard to stand out from all the
other guys she s met. Unless you re extraordinary, you ll
have a hard time standing out in her mind.

And at any given moment,

they re probably dating
(maybe even sleeping with)
a couple of guys

This means she has a lot of

options. Unless you stand
out, you re going to have a hard time igniting a spark and
getting her attention. You will be a face in a large
crowd.

19

There are also biological aspects to attraction that you

need to be aware of. Even though you don t want to get a
girl pregnant, the biological and psychological aspects of
attraction and dating are about procreation.

A girl will be attracted to a guy that presents the best stock

for having a child with. That is to say, it is a strong guy
that will produce strong and healthy babies.

It all begins with physical attraction: What a guy looks

like. Different girls have different definitions what is
sexy.

You don t have to have bulging arms and a six pack to get
a date or even get a girl in bed. You just have to make the
right connection. Physical attraction is the first thing that
gets a girl to notice you.

The next step beyond the initial physical attraction is

whether a guy is a good match for them on an emotional
level. This has to do with child rearing.

Does a man have the potential to be a good father? If a

girl can connect on an emotional level with a guy and feel
safe with them, they will definitely pursue them.

Again the goal is not to have baby with every girl you meet,
you just need to be aware of what is going on biologically
with a woman and what makes them attracted to a certain
kind of guy. (These thoughts will ALWAYS be present At
least on a subconscious level)

Call-Back Humor

20
When you meet a girl for the first time and get her number
you may know she s really into you. There are signs like
eye contact and physical touching. If a girl touches you
while they are talking or giving you her number, you have
a keeper.

Other times you might call a girl and she might not
remember who you are. She could have met a lot of guys
that night, or even had too much to drink. That s why it s
important to stand out.

To increase your overall success

with women, you have to create a
special bond with EACH girl you
meet. One way to accomplish this
is what I like to name Call back
humor.

Call-back humor is where you create a funny routine

during the first time you met. This can be nickname you
give her, or it could be a funny role-playing routine you
created.

This is follows the basics of mental philosophy and system

called NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming). In this
system you are creating an anchor in her mind. This is a
word or situation in which unlocks memories, feelings or
even actions.

By accessing this anchor, she ll remember the good

feelings she had when you first met. You can make her
laugh and feel at ease to triggering this memory.

For instance, a couple of weeks ago, I met a girl who was

originally from Eastern Europe. (I forget what country she
told me)

Text Box: To increase your overall success with women, you have to create a spec
ial bond with EACH girl you meet.

21
What was humorous was she had a funny little accent and
said Very Nice a few times. So naturally, I gave her the
nickname of Borat, which referenced a movie that came
out in the U.S. a few years back.

I teased her and asked if she wore suits like Borat. And
knowing that she saw the movie, I ask if she was the #4
prostitute in all of Khastakstan.

I spent a lot of time teasing her and it made her laugh. I

created an anchor in her mind with the name Borat. This
name connected me to her feeling at ease and laughing.

Now this was important because when I called her back, I

made references to this Borat nickname. By using the word
Borat once I reconnected to her on the phone, we went
QUICKLY back to the fun, teasing conversation we had
when we first met.

With call-back humor, you want to create a fun interaction

that is unique to the two of you. You can easily create an
anchor to start your phone conversation by giving her a
nickname.

Call-back humor is designed to put her BACK into the state

where she ll feel RE-attracted to you. So it s YOUR job to
create that special, FUNNY connection during your first
meeting.

Reference an Event

I ve found that the BEST way to get a number is to have a

busy life and appear to have many options. This puts the
girl in pursuit by making it seem that she needs to get you

22
to call her because she is important enough in your busy
life to pay her some attention.

You want to talk about the things

you do. Then use an upcoming event
to get her number. This gives her a
reason to want to give you her
number. This beats asking for her
number WITHOUT a plan.

It s easier to get a girl s number if you re following up with

something she s agreed to. An example is that you know
about a fun party that s happening next weekend.

So when talking to her, discuss your week. Make it seem

interesting, but don t invite her too quickly. Don t make it
seem like some planned line you re trying to serve her.

When you get to the part about an upcoming event, make

it seem like you had just thought about it and the fact that
you would like to invite her.

Describe how much you re looking forward to the event

and how much fun it will be. The goal is to make her want
to go with you.

Then as you re ending the conversation, act as if you had a

sudden thought and invite her to this event. You can then
ask for her number as a follow up and you have already
set your first date.

Tell her how exciting it will be and continue to build trust

and rapport. You want to make her happy for giving out
her number, and that you were NOT only concerned with
getting her digits.

Text Box:

use an upcoming event to get her number.

23
Another way to get a girls number
that you enjoyed her conversation
in the future. But for now, we re
got her number on the pretense of
event

is to simply tell her

and want to talk to her
going to assume that you
inviting her out to an

Once you have her number, how long do you wait to

call?

This is a question that plagues many guys. In the next

section, we re going to cover when you should make the
important first call.

24
The Timing of Your Phone CallThe Timing of Your Phone Call

As you read in the introduction the timing of phone calls is

a favorite topic for many guys.

EVERY guy has his own personal theory on the subject.

Some say wait 3-4 days, while others may suggest that
you call immediately.

Many of these theories stem from fear of appearing too

desperate. The guys who say wait a few days are the ones
who think calling too early makes you seem needy. So are
they right?

In my opinion, I think the length to

call really depends on how SOLID
the connection was when you first
met the girl.

If you know you REALLY hit it off,

then you can afford to wait a few
days.

If however the connection wasn t that strong, then you

should call as soon as possible. With this phone call you
should focus on building more interest and attraction.

My personal technique is to call a girl somewhere in

the 48 hour range. I try not to wait too long to call her. I
have just found this is a good time frame to call in. This
goes back to our conversation about other guys talking to
this girl. You ARE in a competition.

If you allow TOO much time to elapse, then she won t feel
that connection she felt when you first met her.

Text Box: the length to call really depends on how SOLID the connection was when

you first met the girl.

25
Another thing I have found effective is to send a text
message to a girl within a couple of hours of meeting
a girl.

This will be brief message, usually in some form of teasing.

The messages don t seek value. In other words, you re not
asking her questions NOR does it say anything like It was
nice to meet you. It is just a simple flirtation.

Going back to my earlier example using the nickname

Borat, I sent the following text to that girl: Holy shit, I
just met another person with a crazy Borat accent. Do you
people travel in packs?!?! This is a subtle message
because it uses call-back humor AND it references my
status as being a guy who is out meeting OTHER people.

Don t Be

The Creepy/Stalker Guy

Let me begin with another scene from the movie

Swingers

[It's 2:32am, and Mike decides to call Nikki, a girl he met just a
few hours ago]

[Nikki's machine picks up: Hi, this is Nikki. Leave a message]

Mike: Hi, uh, Nikki, this is Mike. I met you at the, um, at the
Dresden tonight. I just called to say that I had a great time... and
you should call me tomorrow, or in two days, whatever. Anyway,
my number is 213-555-4679 -

[the machine beeps]

Mike: [Mike calls back, the machine picks up]

26
Mike: Hi, Nikki, this is Mike again. I just called cuz it sounded like
your machine might've cut me off when I, before I finished leaving
my number. Anyway, uh, and, y'know, and also, sorry to call so
late, but you were still at the Dresden when I left so I knew I'd get
your machine. Anyhow, uh, my number's 21 -

[the machine beeps]

Mike: [Mike calls back; the machine picks up again]

Mike: 213-555-4679. That's it. I just wanna leave my number. I

didn't want you to think I was weird or desperate, or... we should
just hang out and see where it goes cuz it's nice and, y'know, no
expectations. Ok? Thanks a lot. Bye bye.

[hangs up]

Mike: [Mike walks away from the phone... then walks back and
calls again; once again, the machine picks up]

Mike: I just got out of a 6-year relationship, Ok? That should help
explain why I'm acting so weird. I just wanted you to know that.
It's not you, it's me. I'm sorry... This is Mike.

[hangs up]

Mike: [Mike calls back, the machine picks up again]

Mike: Hi, Nikki, this is Mike. Could you just call me when you get
in? I'm gonna be up for awhile and I'd just rather speak to you in
person instead of trying to fit it all into -

[the machine beeps]

Mike: Fuck!

[Mike calls back, gets the machine again]

27
Mike: Uh, Nikki? Mike. It's uh, uh, it's just, uh, this just isn't
working out. I think you're great, but maybe we should just take
some time off from each other. It's not you, it's me. It's what I'm
going through, alright? It's uh... it's only been 6 months ...

Nikki: [picks up] Mike?

Mike: [very cheerful] Nikki? Great! Did you just walk in or were
you listening all along?

Nikki: Don't ever call me again.

[hangs up]

Mike: Wow. I guess you're home.

This additional quote emphasizes another key point I want

to make about WHEN to call women and how often in a
short time span.

In a later section, we re going to discuss how to handle

non-responsive women, but for now, I want to mention
that you should NEVER call women more than once or
twice ever OTHER day.

Remember, you re the HIGH value guy. You have

things to do and people to see. If you are calling all the
time it shows you a desperate and alone with nothing to do.

Guys with LOTS of stuff going on are NOT calling women

47 times a day. So don t call her several times in a day. If
she didn t answer, don t call again for a day or so. Calling
too much makes you look like a desperate and pathetic.

You CAN call and if you don t leave a voice mail, then

contact her a little bit later with a text message. As I ve

said, don t overwhelm her with phone calls.

28
You should be proactive, NOT needy.

It s a delicate balancing act. It s normal in the

beginning to do TOO much of either. With some experience,
you ll learn WHEN to call and when NOT to call.

Now that you ve gotten her number and you re about to

call her, how do you handle nervousness?

In this next section, we re going to cover a few points

about how to avoid the anxiety that happens before calling
a woman

29
Phone Anxiety

Using a phone to call a girl can be a source of anxiety for

guys. They focus on NOT doing the wrong thing because all
she needs is an excuse to not see you again.

Many men have anxiety for no particular reason, even if

they know a woman is interested.

Even worse, there s that panic you feel where you simply
want to hang up before she even answers the phone. The
fear can be paralyzing.

Sometimes you may discover that she s NOT in the fun

mood she was when you met her. She s suddenly cold and
unresponsive to your questions. It s like she s a completely
different girl. This can terrify a guy.

The root problem of phone anxiety

much emphasis on one girl.

is placing TOO

No girl is worth getting nervous and anxious over. Don t

ever think that she is your ONLY chance for dating. If you
do you ll convey a desperate vibe in your voice.

On the other hand, if you re meeting and calling LOTS of

girls, you ll give off a relaxed vibe. This calm demeanor
comes with experience from talking to different girls.
You re not so concerned with the outcome of one
conversation because you re talking to lots of different
people.

Your goal is to NOT impress her over the phone. You ll only
end up looking like you re trying too hard. You need to be
casual, relaxed and a little aloof. Have the mindset that
you have options.

30

Here is a quick way to eliminate the anxiety caused

by calling a girl

Beforehand, it s important
talk about. Keep a notepad
points to talk about. This
what to say. She won t see
more in control.

to have a little material ready to

nearby and think of a few
helps for when you get stuck with
your notes and so you will feel

The trick is to act; not react. If you have a plan and

material, you will be in control and your confidence will be
evident in your voice.

Talk a little slower and lower your voice. Having options in

your dating life is a quick way to project a confident
attitude over the phone. You won t worry about being a
screw up; instead you ll naturally let the conversation flow
over the phone.

A good thing to have in your

dating life is different women
you can call. This may seem
counterintuitive, but when you
have LOTS of women in your
life, it becomes easier to
attract a specific one.

It helps develop confidence and a positive self esteem.

These characteristics are essential in attracting the right
woman.

You ll be more relaxed over the phone because you know

that the girl you are talking to is not your only option. If it
goes badly, then you can move on to the next girl.

Text Box: ...when you have LOTS of women in your life, it becomes easier to attr
act a specific one.

31
Planning Out Your Call

Another great way is to have a plan of what you re

going to say before the phone call.

Make a brief script of your talking points. Remember she s

not going to see them, so don t be afraid to jot down the
important things you wish to discuss.

Just like anything in your life, having a plan of action can

do wonders for your success. Before you make a call, plan
out a detail of what you ll say.

Some things you can talk about can include:

. A funny story of something that just happened to you

. A few questions to ask her to get to know her better
and stimulate conversation
. Backup stories, anecdotes or openers to use if the
conversation gets slow
. A few teasing/funny comments that has worked with
other girls
. A reminder to discuss the date idea you discussed when
you first met
. A high status way to handle the conversation if she
suddenly has other plans
. Second date idea (Use as a last resort)
. A closure to end the conversation on a high note

Now as you re about to call her, you want to understand

some general rules. If you break them, then you ll hurt
your chances of re-attracting her OR setting up a date. In

32
the next section, we re going to cover what I consider to
be those important rules

33
5 Rules for Calling Women

Rule #1

Have a Purpose

Most of the time, calling a girl will be done during the

comfort stage of your interaction. Remember that this
is the point where she s ALREADY attracted to you and has
interest. So your goal is to re-attract her while continuing
the sexual tension that you created when the two of you
first met.

So the purpose of your phone call

should be twofold

First you want to continue sexual

tension which means teasing her,
building attraction, while establishing
comfort. Typically this involved
getting to know her more. Telling a
few stories and doing openers.

The second purpose for the call is to

set up a date. In fact, I would consider this to the most
important step of the process. In order to establish a
sexual connection, you have to get her in person. This
means the phone should be used to reestablish the
connection, and then firmly nail down a date.

There may be times you might ONLY want to focus on reattracting her and NOT going for a date. You may wait for
the second or third call to establish the date.

It s important for YOU to know what s needed for the

particular girl you are talking to. Basically you have two
options:

34
. Re-attract without going for the date . Re-attract without going for the date
. Re-attract and then set up the date . Re-attract and then set up the date

BEFORE you call, you must figure what s the purpose of

the call. Is it for re-attraction, setting up a date or both?
BEFORE you call, you must figure what s the purpose of
the call. Is it for re-attraction, setting up a date or both?

That way, you can steer the

things that will accomplish
seeing her in person again.
That way, you can steer the
things that will accomplish
seeing her in person again.

Rule #2

conversation towards the

your ultimate goal which is
conversation towards the
your ultimate goal which is

Be Fun & Energetic Rule #2

Be Fun & Energetic

If you did your job right, you met her with high energy and
fun. This is the exact same state that you want to replicate
when you first start talking to her.

Women make a connection

between a guy s demeanor and
what he s like in the bedroom.

When you act like a fun guy, you ll

make her realize that you could
possibly be fun in many other
ways. In other words, an exciting personality directly taps
into the pleasure side of a woman s brain, and yes this is
a good thing!

One of the major problems I see in conversations between

the genders is what each sex discusses.

The mistake that guys make is to converse with

women in a logical manner. They think a woman
prefers to know only background information about a guy,
Text Box: Women make a connection between a guy s demeanor and what he s like in the
bedroom.

35
so they steer a conversation towards topics based on facts
(i.e. job, hometown, background, hobbies, etc.)

While these are useful topics for rapport, they do nothing

to build attraction.

As you know, a woman is an emotional creature. When she

meets a guy, she enjoys that tingly feeling of sexual
tension. The guy who can engage the emotional side of her
brain is the one she ll be attracted to, and one of the best
ways to trigger this response is to display a fun personality.

When you re a fun guy, your goal is to avoid all boring

conversations. Instead, focus on being the man who can
bring a woman on an emotional roller coaster. One minute,
she s laughing and having fun, and the next, she s turned
on and wondering if you re into her.

Being a fun guy can be accomplished in a number of

ways:

. Through hobbies: I cannot stress this enough have

passions other than women! This not only makes you
more interesting, but it also provides for some great
stories.
. Through humor: You don t have to be a stand-up
comic to be funny. Learn to laugh at yourself, and pick
innocent fun at the things around you.
. Through stories: What s the craziest thing you ve ever
done? Why did your friends give you that particular
nickname? Think about your life and what others might
find entertaining about it.
. Through a fun routine: This kind of goes along with
the first point about having hobbies. Don t be the guy

36
who goes to work, comes home, and repeats it all over
again. Have other things going for you as well.
. Through people you know: Do you know (or have
you met) any celebrities? Even better, do you and the
girl have any mutual friends? Use that to your
advantage by letting everyone (not just the girl) know
what a fun guy you are!

A useful trick is to
moment that you call
created a context of
talking to her. This
you were having when

immediately launch
her. That way, you
fun and excitement
brings her back to
you first met.

into a story from the

ve immediately
when you re
the fun point that

Another technique is to use your call-back humor.

Start with her nickname and tell a story about something
that happened during your day that relates to your shared
moment

Bottom line is you want to the fun guy whom she met.

Rule #3

Never Bore Her

You shouldn t be talking for hours on the phone. Keep

conversations to the point. You are a high status guy and
have lots going on in your life. High status guys don t
spend HOURS on the phone. They re busy living their lives.

Out of nervousness, some guys tend to ramble for hours

on the phone with women; they talk about everything
that s going on in their lives and want to be more intimate.

When you re talking to a woman, you want to keep her

interested, without boring her to tears.

37

If you want to talk about yourself,

minute time frame. Keep the rest of
being in person with her. I suggest
for NO longer than 20 minutes. This
creating attraction and showing the
personality.

do so ONLY in the 10-20

the conversation for
staying on the phone
is the optimal time for
fun side of your

Work off HER mood. If she s low or you know it s not

working, try to change her attitude with the stories that
you re telling. This basically bypasses any initial hesitation
she has by steamrolling her negativity. As long as you re
vibing, you can stay on the phone

But once it s winding down, you should either go for the

date or END the call. Don t stay on the phone for hours
talking about nothing in particular. Try to stay focused on
your goals. Save these other conversations for when you
meet in person.

Rule #4

Avoid

Relationship Conversations

Don t treat her like you re already in a relationship.

You just met her. This even goes if you felt a special
connection OR if you had sex the first night. Just because
you were intimate does not mean that you own her now.

This means the phone isn t the time to probe her for her
dating lifestyle. You shouldn t ask about the guys she is
seeing during her free time, nor should you grill her about
other relationships she has had.

If she s a confident woman, she will NOT allow you to

control her life. So asking about what she s doing will only
serve to repulse her. It will feel like you are trying to
control her.

38

You don t want to ask her what she s looking for in a

guy or a relationship. It shows your own insecurity.
You re showing that you re concerned with how you
measure up to the competition. Confident guys don t show
this sign of weakness. They act as if they are large and in
charge.

A high status guy KNOWS he is the prize that women have

to work hard for. A high status guy is not concerned with
her dating habits. You have to ASSUME that she s going to
be attracted to you.

ALSO, you want to avoid QUALIFYING yourself with

your phone conversation:

Many guys focus on winning a girl s heart over the phone.

They start with rapport and seek to get her affection
through revealing his inner-awesomeness.

A phone conversation is neither the time nor the place to

win a girls heart. This should be done when you see her,
not over the phone.

Women are drawn to high status guys. These are the men
who don t care about what a girl thinks. They are confident
and know that they are attracted to them. Don t talk about
all the traits that you have which make you a wonderful
boyfriend. If you do your job right, she ll intuitively pick up
on these through your stories and personality.

Don t be concerned with trying to be her Perfect Guy.

This moves you back into the controlling and desperate
territory.

In other words, when a girl discusses what she hates in a

man, don t quickly agree and qualify yourself. This shows

39
that you re trying to fit HER ideals, instead of qualifying
her.

Rule #5

YOU are the Qualifier

Women approach dating as a way to qualify guys and will

look for ways to eliminate them from their lives. You
should do the same.

Make the call with the mindset that you re actively looking
for something where she will disqualify herself from your
life. ONLY if she proves herself will you want to go on a
date or see her again. (To be honest, MOST girls will NOT
be the one for you)

By being the one who makes the decision, you ll have the
power in the relationship.

MOST of your phone numbers won t lead anywhere. Think

of them as sales leads . They could lead somewhere,
but you have to do some work to turn them into dates. You
must use your phone skill to make the correct
determinations.

40
The Beginning of the Phone CallThe Beginning of the Phone Call

The way you begin your call sets

the tone for the rest of the
conversation. You want to continue
the positive emotion that you
created when you first met her.

At the beginning of the call you are doing a mini- Reattraction. You re using your phone skills to engage her
interest. Try to be the guy who makes her laugh and lifts
her mood.

Most guys start off really boring with their conversation.

Don t get into this conversation trap. This is where you
provide NOTHING for the first couple of sentences. You
might say things like Hey what s up , then How are you
then That s great. This does nothing to build attraction, it
will only bore her and create awkward silence.

To illustrate this point, here is a sample of a boring

conversation:

Dave: Hey Tracy, this is Dave. I met you at Pat s Bar the other
night

Tracy: Oh yeah, hi How are you doing?

Dave: Good. Busy day I didn t call at a bad time, did I?

Tracy: Ummm actually I m kind of busy now

Dave: Oh Ok. Maybe I should call back some other time. Or

can you talk right now?

Tracy:

Well how about you call me back in a few hours ,

Text Box: The way you begin your call sets the tone for the rest of the conversa
tion.

41

Blah, blah, blah conversation ends!

Just from the tone of the conversation, you can tell that
Dave will get NOWHERE with Tracy.

He s not acting like the fun, exciting person she met.

Instead, he s acting in a boring, predictable manner. She is
probably hoping he will lose her number. Maybe she will be
lucky enough to have caller ID.

When you get a woman on the phone, don t ask what

she s doing or if she s busy, don t talk about how you met,
and don t go into a long introduction.

If you did your job right when you got her number, she
should immediately recognize who you are. The key is to
NOT ask what she s doing OR how she s feeling. If you do
this you will provide the perfect excuse for her to get rid of
you. Instead, you instantly taking over the power of the
conversation.

From the beginning of the conversation use call-back

humor to reconnect with her. Start by greeting her
nickname or some other related call-back humor. Then
launch into a story. This shows that you re not a stranger
and quickly helps to re-establish that connection you had.

For instance, I ll paraphrase a conversation from that

Eastern European girl:

Hey Borat I JUST saw something that totally reminded

me of my favorite #4 prostitute in all of Khasakstan

Then I immediately launch into a story that s funny and

related to our previous interaction.

42
Ditch the awkward pauses. Start telling a story from
your life or something interesting that happened during the
day. Don t run out of things to say. Have a plan and notes
if you need them. Simply launch into stories from your life,
or start asking her about related topics. Keep an eye on
the time and don t lose your focus.

Give her a reason why you re calling. Tell her something

reminded you of her and made you call her. This makes it
seem like the call was more spontaneous.

If you feel nervous beforehand, call a good friend and use

him or her to warm up in a positive mood.

Your voice matters. Speak in a deep, calm voice that

radiates an upbeat energy. Don t speak in a cracked high
pitched voice.

The beginning is about setting the tone and emotion

of the conversation. You want her to start thinking of a
strong emotion. Get her talking about what she s
passionate about. Make her discuss positive emotions.
Avoid bad emotions.

Think about her emotions. Remember how it was when you

first met, and she was having a good time. She WANTED
you to call her. Now is your opportunity to recreate that
strong sense of a connection.

When you call her, she might NOT be feeling that social
feeling. You have to get her back to the state when she
first talked to you. That s why call-back humor is so
important, and why you have to take control of the
conversation from the moment you start talking.

Finally the 80/20 rule applies to phone

conversations. YOU will be doing most of the talking at

43
first. If you re expecting her to carry half the conversation,
then the conversation will go nowhere.

Your job is to lead the conversation. Like every other

aspect of your game, you have to be willing to lead.

After a few minutes of stories and call-back humor, you re

going to switch over to the middle part of the phone
conversation which we will discuss in the next section

44
The Middle of the Phone CallThe Middle of the Phone Call

Before we discuss middlephone game , I want to

remind you of something. Your
success with the phone is in
direct proportion to the
connection you made during
your first meeting.

The better your in-person game, the less you ll have to

work on the phone.

The phone is ONLY used to build rapport and set-up dates.

You have to do the work on the front end to initiate the
attraction between you and the girl.

With enough practice, you ll learn when she s ready to

meet up. (Actually, when you re good at talking on the
phone, you ll typically get women asking YOU for dates)

If you barrage her with date requests, you only look like
you have nothing going on with your life. Women want
guys who aren t needy.

Now once you get past the introduction, you want to spend
about 7-10 minutes re-creating that initial attraction you
had when you first met.

Here are a few techniques for creating that positive

emotion she had when she first met you:

#1- Tell Stories

Text Box: Your success with the phone is in direct proportion to the connection
made during your first meeting.

45
These are stories and routines that make her interested in
you and your exciting life. The idea these conversation
pieces should sub-communicate ALL the traits of a
desirable male. You need to accomplish this without
coming on too strong or bragging.

With your stories you want them to know the following

about you:
.
.
.
.
.

You re a prize
Women like you
You have options
You live a busy and fun life
You have a wide social circle

So on one level, you re telling a story or something funny

that happened, but you re actually communicating that
you re a high status male.

Once you know the conversation is vibing and she s

interested, you can start establishing rapport and deeper
emotional connection. Don t overdo this, but subcommunicate that you have options in your life.

#2- Be Funny

While you re telling stories, you want to keep up the funny

tone you had when first met her. Tease her and try to be
cocky and funny.

As I discussed in Flirt Mastery, humor is one of the classic

traits that REALLY attract women. This is equally true of
talking to a girl on the phone.

46
With that being said, there is a danger to using
humor the wrong way.

Some guys think that they HAVE

phone. But if you try to hard,
across as overly needy or even
know when a guy is using humor
their approval.

to be funny over the

it s another way to come
creepy. Women intuitively
as a way to win over

The guys who BEST use humor are not concerned with
trying to win a girl s approval; instead they are talking
primarily to amuse themselves. It lightens the mood and
keeps a girls interest.

#3

Be

The Prize

This is a funny attitude to have, especially since YOU are

doing the calling. Your phone conversation should revolve
around subtly communicating that you are not like ordinary
men. You are someone they should covet.

While on one level you re

talking about your life,
you re telling her:

I m a great guy who has

lots of options and lots of
fun. YOU will have to prove
yourself in order to get my
attention

Your goal is to get her to chase YOU. You want to be

the prize she is after.

47
But with the being said, you have to be the one to make
HER chase you. Take the initiative and set up the instances
where she WANTS to be part of your life. (We ll cover how
to do this in the next section)

#4

Qualify and Build Rapport

As I mentioned before, you will be doing most of the

talking at first. You use the ratio of 80/20 where you are
doing 80% of the talking.

After a few minutes, your stories should spark her interest.

She ll probably feel re-attracted and will remember WHY
she gave her number to you.

At this point, you will want to back away some allow the
conversation to become more 50/50.

This is where you stop pushing the conversation to get her

to open up a little. Allow her to talk a little about her day.
Ask her questions. Qualify and see if she matches your
ideal of a quality woman.

Ask her stuff like What are you passionate about? , What
do you like to do for fun?

Just don t ask things that put her on the defense. Just keep
it fun and interesting.

For this part of the phone call, I found that it s important to

write a few notes about our previous conversation. Get
information on her. The more information she yields, the
more of a connection she ll feel. Listen to what she s saying
and get the important details.

48
Use the questions that you wrote down ahead of time to
get her to fill in the blanks about her life. Make them open
ended questions, not yes or no questions. This encourages
her to talk more.

49
The End of the Phone Call

As I mentioned before, you want to keep conversation in

the 10-15 minute range. Towards the end, you want to
determine if you re going to ask for the date.

Don t call her up and immediately start asking for a date.

This makes you look aggressive or too desperate. Use the
beginning and middle part of the conversation to connect
and make her want to see you again.

THEN you can go for the date. If the time and

circumstance is right, don t hesitate- ASK.

Calibrating the Phone Call

Calibrate your phone calls. Look for the indicators that

she s interested in seeing you again. Then tell her that you
would like to see her during the week for a drink or a cup
of coffee.

Don t make it a big deal. Make it seem like you just

thought of it. Use the phone call as the basis for your
decision to see her. This is the illusion that you weren t
originally interested in setting up a date only to chat.

In essence, you re screening her. This is the essence of

being a challenge. It will make her wonder about you.

One of the keys that you re doing well is when a girl starts
listing what she s doing in the evening or later in the week.
It is her way of communicating that she s looking for you
to initiate the conversation about meeting up. She wants
you to ask her out.

50
If you re getting the vibe that she s ready to be asked out,
then you should set up the date. Don t be too anxious, be
very cool about it.

Setting Up the Date

If the timing is right as the conversation ends, go for

closing the date. Say it in a casual tone like Hey, we
should meet for a drink this week. Then shut-up.

Let her describe her schedule to you. Pick out a day that
works for you.

A different technique you could try is to turn it around and

tell her what days you re busy, then set up plans on a
specific day. Invite her to something fun that you re doing.
Try not to frame anything as a date.

Don t say something lame like, We should go on a date?

That s high school dating at a soda shop. Instead say
something like You should come hang out or I m about
to go to the mall, you should join me.

You don t want to detract from yourself by trying to lure

her with something like a fancy restaurant. Instead you
want to BE the value to the interaction. You goal is to
make her want to be around you, not use you for an
expensive dinner.

Call her up and talk about what you re doing. Make it

sound interesting even if it is just shopping in a mall. Then
invite her to join you. Turn what could be a mundane list of
stuff into something interesting.

51
What If She Says

No

or Maybe ?

If a girl says I m not sure, call me the day before and ask
me , tell her NO, you need a few days advance notice to
schedule things.

Don t let her make you chase her. Let her know about your
busy schedule. Then say that you can always do something
when she s less busy. Be firm and communicate that it s
important to keep up commitments that people make with
you.

Sometimes you ll get the excuse that she s busy or

can t do anything. If she s busy, then talk about ONE
other thing that you re doing. If she seems REALLY
interested, then you can set up plans, otherwise, tell her
you ll call back to set something up.

One tactic I like to do is act like I didn t hear her No

response . I quickly return to the re-attraction material.
Then I go for a different close like doing something
spontaneous or easy to say yes to like, let s grab some
ice-cream now . That tactic usually works to get to meet
with the busy women.

This leads to something that I ve started to do which is

VERY successful

Be Spontaneous

This is a great phone tactic for girls who have said

NO to previous date requests. Call a woman early
evening on a weekday. Talk for a few minutes and then
suddenly have a thought and ask what she s doing at
that moment.

52

If she s actually doing something, then talk about what you

have going on in the evening. Make sure that it s
something that you would NOT ask her to come to. [Like
you re about to go running or to the gym]

If she says nothing much , then you could suggest

something to do. Have something ready before you call.
This sharply decreases her ability to say no and will get
you a date quickly.

Ending the Phone Conversation

Regardless if you did or didn t set up a date you

shouldn t hang up after talking about the plans. This
can make it seem that was all you were after. Your game
will be revealed. Instead, continue for a minute or so.

Playfully banter, tease and share another story.

YOU should be the one to end the phone call. You must
know when to end the conversation. DO this before the
conversation lags into stale territory.

Demonstrate value by ending first and having a reason to

get off.

An example would be I have to go. I promised my buddy

I would help pick out furniture for her new apartment
Remember you are a busy guy who has stuff to do.

Convey this as you re ending the conversation. No matter

what, end on a high note. Show the same level of energy
that you did from the moment you started talking to her.

53
Phone Call Roadblocks and Obstacles

Not all phone conversations will go smoothly. In fact,

with almost EVERY woman, you ll encounter a few
problems along the way. It s all HOW you handle these
situations that will determine if you can turn phone
numbers into dates or goodbyes.

In this section, we re going to cover a few different tactics

to help out with your phone conversation problems

Voicemail

If you get her voicemail, leave a message. Just don t

hang up and call back 23 times. Many people have caller
ID and all of those calls will show up. You will seem like a
desperate freak. Don t do it.

Remember she s busy and might not have time to talk on

the phone. Girls get busy just like guys.

Don t get annoyed if she s never answering the phone.

Ditch the mindset where you think she doesn t want to talk
to you. She may not have the time. Most of the time, she ll
be VERY happy to talk to you.

There are TWO types of messages you could leave on a

machine:

Teaser/Call to Action- Do a call-to-action to get her

to return your calls. Give something that ll provide an
opportunity for her to call you back. In fact, you can make
it a teaser; something that ll emotionally prompt her to call
you back.

54
Here is an example, Hey this is Dave I just saw the MOST
amazing thing you have to hear this. A message like this
will definitely make her call you back.

The other option is to be straight to the point. This is

where you simply use call-back humor and tell her to call
you back, nothing more.

Instead of saying, Hey Tracy, I loved meeting you the

other night. We have to go on a date sometime . Simply
say something like: Hey Borat, this is Dave Call me
back.

Simple but effective!

She Never Calls You Back

This is when a girl doesn t respond to any other your

texts or phone calls. I have the mindset that just
because a woman doesn t call back, it doesn t ALWAYS
mean there is no interest there. Sure some will blow you
off, but most women have a lot going on in their lives.

Don t give up if she s not calling you back. Even if she says
she will, your response should be No problem or OK,
cool .

If you re NOT in a relationship with this girl, she owes you

NOTHING. You re still in the dance of sexual tension.

Sometimes she might do stuff that s flaky but it s your job

to maintain this tension and not get worked up if she s not
doing her part.

Try again

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There s nothing to lose by being a little persistent.

Vary the time that you could call her:

Morning, or night or even the afternoon. Continue to

pursue for a week on the schedule of every other day. If
you can t get in touch, try texting her.

Don t worry about calling a few times. If you feel you

have strong internal game, then you won t look like you
have low social value. If you re communicating value, it
won t matter the amount you re calling, unless you cross
over to being a stalker. Have the mindset that you re
calling to entertain yourself, NOT her.

If you don t hear from her by the end of a week, then it s

probably time to move on. Even if you stop calling her,
keep her number around. You would be surprised at the
response if you invite a couple of dead numbers to a fun
event like a Halloween party.

You can call the numbers in your phone book that you ve
lost touch with or you can simply send a happy Halloween
text to the girls in your book. This can help you start
talking to a girl again.

If She s Always Too Busy

If she s rushed or not talkative, it s better to call back at a
later time. Unless you re REALLY good at changing a girl s
mood, it won t help to have a BAD phone conversation. So
don t try to set up a date if she s not in a receptive mood.

If she keeps turning down multiple offers, then it is

probably a problem with your game. You probably didn t fit

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HER criteria for someone she wants to date. Your job is to
figure out what you re doing right when you first met her.

Some of the reasons she may not be into you are:

. Not matching her dating style (Classic attraction

archetype )
. You have low social value
. You appear too needy or desperate
. You were too quick to ask for her number
. She has a boyfriend

One of the major problems with getting a phone number is

the good chance that she won t call you back or may not
be really interested.

My solution to this is simple.

Make sure you built enough
attraction when you first meet a
woman.

If she s not calling you back, then it s probably because of

a mistake that YOU MADE when you first met her. If this is
the case, no amount of cajoling or stalking her will make
her call you back.

Being busy is NOT an excuse

If her perfect dream guy life calls up, she would

IMMEDIATELY drop what she s doing. Your job is to convey
that you have a HIGH enough status that she wouldn t
hesitate to agree to do something with you.

Text Box: make sure you build enough attraction when you first meet a woman.

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Flaking

Most men think girls flake out because they re not

attracted. This isn t true.

What happens to most women when they meet an

interesting guy is they get into state and honestly enjoy
the conversation. But these feelings are quickly forgotten
when the real world gets in the way.

When a guy calls, they now have to fit him in with their
everyday lives. They forget the positive fun, feelings they
had with this guy.

Think about your average attractive girl. She meets a cool

guy and spends some time with him and gives out her
number. At the time, she IS interested in him. And she
honestly wants to see him in the future.

But, the future is a general

time frame

When you call for a SPECIFIC date, she now is being asked
to mentally locked into a real event.

The hard part is that your date idea has to initially beat
anything better than sitting around and doing nothing. This
isn t very hard to do.

It gets tricky, because she s meeting LOTS of guys.

These guys are going to be asking her out just like you are.

She does NOT have time to date 10-15 guys each week.

Most of those potential guys are going to lose out. It gets

especially difficult when she s nervous about meeting

strange men. She s not sure if you re a psycho who will

58
rape or attack her. If she s not comfortable, she won t
want to date you.

All of this can add up to her looking for reasons to

NOT see you. Most women don t want to be in a socially
awkward situation. Furthermore, she might take into
account WHY you re interested in her. Are you desperate?
Are you only after sex?

Good looking women consistently

get validation from the guys
they re dating. Many don t have
those feelings of neediness that
guys get. So it s easy for them to
ditch a few, because the have an
abundance mentality . They
know it s easy to find someone
else who will be pursuing them.

Some girls will not respond to

your texting/calling.

This might make you angry. But,

NEVER confront this behavior.
Don t leave a message on her machine saying you re
getting annoyed or if you see her, don t make her feel bad
for not responding. This will kill a relationship before it has
a chance to really start.

When you contact her again, your best solution is to simply

NOT TALK ABOUT HER FLAKY BEHAVIOR.

Continue to flirt and have fun with her. Act as if you don t
care that she s not responding to you.

Never lecture her about not responding. Don t get angry

and lose your cool. These actions only make you look weak

59
and needy. And to be honest, she probably doesn t really
care how you feel. The fault lies within you.

If you don t create enough interest, then it s YOUR fault

that she s not following up with your plans. No matter what
sacrifices you make, it really doesn t mean anything to her.

If she knows you changed around your entire life

just to meet her, then you have lowered your social
status.

As we ve discussed, the high status guys have LOTS of

women vying for his attention. He does NOT arrange his
life around a specific girl, NOR does he get upset if one
blows him off. He keeps living his life.

The best reaction to a woman who acts flaky is to simply

tell her it s okay and you re going to invite somebody else.

Getting angry for her flaky or fickle behavior never works.

It makes her feel like she s being put on the spot, like she
has to defend herself.

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Conclusion

As I mentioned before, the phone is ONE part of your

game. It s a tool that ll help you stay in the touch with the
women you meet. In order to turn numbers into dates, you
have to know how to maintain that sexual tension.

Remember you use the phone for two reasons:

. Re-attraction
. Setting up the date

If you follow the suggestions from this guide, it ll be easy

to spark the chemistry you had when you first met this girl.
Then it s easy to set up a date and work towards a physical
relationship.

With enough practice, you ll quickly develop your dating

skills.

So even if you fail with a girl on the phone, you ve at least

gained some experience that you can use for the NEXT girl
you call up!

Good luck!