Itsnoteasy,itsnevereasy.

Ihearlotsofkidsthesedaystellingtheirmothersor
friendsthatwhentheygrowupthattheywanttobephotographersthattraveltheworld,
capturingshotsthatwouldmaketheheadlinesonmagazinesandbecomethebackgroundon
everydaypeople'scomputers.Butitsnotlikethatitwillneverbelikethat.Well,notforme,
anyways.Ialwaysexpectedittobemoreinterestingthanthis,butwhoamIfooling?Ican
barelykeepmyjob.Mountainsandwolvesarentenoughtokeepmeemployedapparently.
Perhapsthisexpeditionwillturneverythingaround.Ibetternotgetmyhopesupthough,lotsof
photographerstraveltoplacesliketheAmazon,returningwithpicturesofrivers,snakesandof
coursetrees.Nevermindthatthough.Thiswillbedifferent,ormaybeitwont,onlytimewilltell.
Wherearemymanners,mynameis
KenelmRogers.Iliveinagreatcity.Well,mostlyagreat
city,calledToronto
,andIwillbe,insixtythreedays,thirtytwo.
Imalsooneofthemany
employeesatNaturesGlimpse.Itsnotaverywellknownmagazine.Butitsthebestan
unknown,unemployed..Well,ItsthebestIcoulddo.But,Igetthejobdone.Usually.

Sorry.ThereIgoagain,backtothematterathand.TheAmazon,anamazingplaceof
mystery,beautyand,ifyourenotcareful,death,butIfeelquiteconfident.TheguidethatIhired
tomeetmewhenIarrivedandguidemethroughthejunglewasquiteexperienced,makingthe
journeymanytimes,andtheroutethatwewouldbetakingwasapparentlyregularlytraveled.
So,IfeltasurgeofconfidencewhenIfirstboardedtheplanethatwouldbetakingmeintothe
outerreachesofthismagnificentempireofbirds,bugs,vines,and,onceagaintrees.AndI
hopedthateverythingwould,foronce,workout.

ThetripfromthePearsonInternationalAirportwasboring,aswaseveryplanetripIhad
evertakenwas.Irarelywasabletogetawindowseat,andsomehowalwaysendedupnextto
thatonepersonwhoalwayswantedtotalkfortheentiretrip.DidIevermentionthatImnota
reallyfriendlyguy?Wellaccordingtosomeofmycolleaguesthatisthecase.ButIdon'tthink
thatyouneedtobenicetosomeoneunlesstheycanbenefityou.Orelseit'sjustawaste
.But
ThatisjustwhatIthink.Ihopeyouenjoyedyourflight!SaidoneoftheattendantsasIleftthe
AirCanadaflig
htande
nteredthe
AntonioCarlosJobimInternationalAirport.That,ifyoudidnt
kno
wisi
nRioDeJaneiro.

LuckilyIwouldnthavetoleavetheairport,becausemynextflightthatwouldbetaking
meintotheRainforest,wouldbeleavingthisairportin.Ilookedatmywatch,andread3:47
Oops,forgotthetimechange,
IthoughtasIsetthetimeahourahead.Ok,thatmeans
thenextflightleavesinaround,twohours.Great,morewaiting.Butatleastthatgavemetime
tofindsomethingtoeat.Iwalkedthroughthecrowdsoftouristsandlocals,tryingtomakemy
waytoanyformoffood,FinallyIspottedaplacenamed

Spoleto
.Itseemedtobesomesort
ofItalianthemedrestaurant.Ineverreallycaredforit,butItalianwasokay.Itookmyplacein
lineandwaited.Itseemedtotakeforever,butwhenIcheckedthetimeithadonlybeenaround
tenminutessinceIhadlefttheplane.Finallymyturncame,andIputinmyorderforasliceof
vegetarianpizza.Ihadalwayslikedthevegetarianversionofthings.ItmademefeellikeIwas
doingsomethingrightformyhealth.Butstill,pizzaispizza.Ithenproceededtoacquiremyself

aseatinthischaostheycallanai
rportand
satdowntoenjoythelastbitofcivilisedfoodIwould
probablyhaveinawhile.

Afterfinishingmymeal,IdecidedtomakemywaytowhereIwouldbepickedup.Istill
hadmorethananhourbeforeliftoff,butitsbetterbeearlythantomissitaltogether.Thepart
oftheairportwhereIwasheadedseemedlesscrowdedandstuffy.WhenIarrivedatthegate,
therewasnoone,butoneshortoverweightmanwhoworeexpensiveshoesandajacketthat
lookedlikehewasgoingonsomesortofsafari.Idecidednottoengagehiminconversation
andsatasfarawayasIcould.Theminutesseemedtocrawlby,anditfeltlikeanagebefore
thetimefinallycameandthegatewasopened.
NowboardingTheonlystaffmembercalledfromthenowopengate,andtomy
surprisetheothermanstoodupandluggedaoverpackedsuitcasetowardsthedoorwherehe
handedtheworkerhisticketthenheadeddownthecorridortowardstheplane.Iheavedmyself
outofthechairthatIhadclaimed,andaftermakingsureeverythingwasinitsplaceheadedto
wheretheothermanhaddisappeared.
Ticketplease
HereyougoIsaid,asIsearchedmypocketforthepieceofpaperandthenhandedit
tothestaffmember.
HaveaniceflighttheyhadcalledasIheadeddownthecorridor,notthatIpayed
attention.TheCorridorturnedintoasetofstepsheadingtowardstherunwayanditwasnot
longbeforeIstoodattheedgeofthelargeexpanseofpavement.Asingleplanewaitedinfront
ofme,itwassmallandlookedlikeitcouldbarelyholdmorethanfivepeople.Asmalldark
skinnedmanwavedtomefromtheopencargocompartmentoftheplaneasheloaded
somethingthatlookedlikeitwasprobablytherestofmyluggage.Iapproachedanddidnot
havetosayanythingbeforeIwasassaultedwithwordsofgreeting.
Justontimesir!Wellbesettingoffinafewminutes,Mynam
es
Lucas,haveyoumet
yourfellowpassenger?Hesaidashemotionedtotheexpensiveshoesmanwhohad
appearedfrombehindtheengine.
Ah,itismysilentcomrade!SaidthemanthroughathickAmericanaccent.
Almostthoughtyoucouldnttalk!Hecontinuedashelookedmeover.
Ididnotlikethisman,heseemedtoosureofhimself.Ihadonlylistenedtohimforabout
seventeensecondsbutIcouldtell.
SorrytodisappointImumbledasheputhishandoutandIshookitwithless
enthusiasmthananyregularman.
Thenam
esBobbyKingsportthemansaid.
RogersIrepliedasIlookedbackatLuca
sasheshutthecargodoorandglancedover
atus.
WereallsettogogentlemenHesaidasheheadedtowardsthedoorandpulledit
open,Allaboard
Bobbyhoppedaboard
FinallyH
emutteredashepulledhisfatbuttocksintotheplane.Ifollowed
immediatelyafterandsquishedintooneoftheseatsbesidehim,pushingthebackpackIhad
beencarryingwithmeundertheseat.

Nextstop,theAmazon!Lucasjokinglysaidashestarteduptheengineandbeginpullingthe
smallaircrafttowardstherunway,andafterasmallconversationovertheradiotheyweretaking
off.
IneverlikedplanesBobbymumbledasheclenchedthehandlebesidehisseatand
tightenedhisseatbelt.IdidnotreplybecausefranklyIdidnotcare.TheonlythingIwasworried
aboutwasifhewasgoingtobarfallovermeornot.TheplaneascendedandIlookedoutthe
windowtoseethecitybehindusdisappearingandthegreenexpansebeforeusgrowingcloser.
Howlongisthisflightgoingtotake?Bobbyasked.
Nomorethan3hourssir,wereheadedtoasmallvillagewherewellacquiretherestof
oursuppliesLucassaid.UnlikeMr.Arrogantoverthere,Ihadalreadydiscussedthedetailsof
thetripandknewthatIwasinforabitofawait.
Wellitlookslikewellbehereawhile,sowhydontwegettoknoweachotherbetter!
SaidBobby.Somehow,evenwithonlytwopassengers,Iendedupsittingbesidetheonewho
wantedtotalk.
Wellwhatdoyouwanttoknow?Iaskedlessenthusiastic.
Youknow,wheredoyoucomefrom,whytheheckareyouheadingintothemiddleof
nowhere?Bobbysaid,clearlyannoyedattheunsatisfyingreplyhehadreceived.Iforonewas
notinamoodtotalk,notthatIameverinamoodtotalk,butIfeltespeciallylesschattyonthis
particularflight.
Toronto,andtotakepicturesIsaidquicklyandquietly,notwantingtobringupany
othertopicofconversation.
WellyoureachattyoneBobbyreplied,disappointed.NotthatyouwanttoknowbutI
comefromTexas.Imthefounderoftheexotichuntandtrapclub.HepausedThatswhyIm
hereactually,toscoutoutabitofthewildlifeandgetafeeloftheplace,seeifitsworthtakinga
huntingtripwiththeboysHefinishedthelastbitlikehewasproud,proudlikehewasona
secretmissiontosavehiscountryoronareliefpartytohelpthevictimsofadisaster,buthe
wasnot,quitetheoppositereally.Ididnotlikethisman,notthatIeverdid,butIlikedhimeven
lessnowthatIunderstoodhispurpose.
Mythoughtsdriftedawayfromthemanbesidemeandtowardsmoreimportantmatters
inmylife.LasttimeIspokewithmymotherwefought.Inevergotalongwithherandalways
endedupdisagreeingabouteverything.Thatwasthreemonthsago,andIhavenotheardfrom
hersince.

Myfatherwaslongpastdeadhislifetakenbycancerafewyearsback.Ithinkwe
understoodeachother,notthatwespokemorethanmymotherandI,but,whenwedidseeor
talktoeachother,wewereabletoholdaconversationlikeregularhumans,andIalmost
enjoyedthetimeIspentwithhim.Ihadonlyonesibling,myoldersister.Onlyfouryears
separatedusnotthatItmatteredverymuchbecause,toher,Iwasnevermorethanthe
annoyinglittlebrother,andIstillam.Ihavenotseenhersincethefuneralfordad,wherewe
exchangedgreetingsandgoodbyes,butnomore.Iwishthingscouldbedifferent,buttheyare
thewaytheyare.
Ihaveaccomplishedmanythingsinmylife,butonethingIneverachievedisa
relationship.Igotcloseoncebut,afterourfirstdate,Ineverheardfromheragain.Theupside

ofneverformingmeaningfulbondswithsomeoneisthatyouhavenothingtolose,nothingto
leavebehind,nothingtomiss,butyoualsohavenothingtoholdonto.
WehadbeenflyingfornomorethantwohourswhenIwassnappedoutofmytranceof
thoughts.
WHAT?!IheardBobbyyellatthepilot.
Whatshappening?Iaskedquiteconfusedastowhatwashappening.
Thisbozojustsaidthattheressomethingwrongwiththegoddamnedplane!Bobby
yelledbackasheshovedhisfatheaduptowardsthepilot,Whatthehelliswrong?!
Imnotsir,butpleasesitdownandfastenyourseatbeltLucasreplied,tryingtosound
ascalmaspossibleashelookedoverthemanydialsandcontrolsoftheplane.
SITDOWN?Youwantmeto
sitdown?
!BobbysoundedfuriousbutIcouldhearthe
fearinhisvoice.
SitdownItoldhimasItightenedmyownbeltandsecuredallmybelongings.
Nowyouwanttotalk?Helookedatmeasenseofhatredinhiseyesthatquickly
changedtoterrorwhenLucasannouncedthattheywouldhavetotryandmakeanemergency
landing.
IfIdieImgoingtosueyouforallyoureworth.Hegrumbledashesathimselfdown
andfastenedthebelts.
IcouldhearLucasmutteringaprayertosomegodIhadneverheardofbefore,and
Bobbycursingtothehighheavens.
HoldonsirsLucascalledastheplanebegantodescendtowardsthetreesandjungle
below.
Imgoingtodie,Imgoingtodie,ImgoingtodieI
keptthinkingtomyselfastheground
grewevercloser,andasmyimpendingdoomdrewnearmymindclearedandIthoughtofall
themistakesIhadmadeinmylife,howIhadpushedmyfamilyawayandsecludedmyself,my
attitudetowardsothersandmyunderminingoftheirexistence,allthethingsthatIhaddone
wronginmylifecameflyingatmeliketheforestbelow.Timeseemedtoslow,anditfeltlikean
agebeforetherewasanyindicationthatwewereabouttocrash.
Thefirstwefeltwasthelandinggearsmashingintotheforestground,throwingus
forwardinourseats,luckyforusthebeltsheld,wellatleastminedidforIcouldnottellwhat
exactlywashappeningaroundme.Iwasfinallyholdingsomesortofhopethatwemightsurvive
butoutofthecornerofmyeye,Iwasabletocatchaglimpseofthewingjustbeforeitstruck
somethingthatIassumedwasatree,andwewereflungaroundandtoomanyotherdirections
thatIdidnotevenbotherremembering.
Woulditeverstop?
Iwonderedtomyself,surprisedthatIcouldthinkofanythingduring
thischaosand,asifsomeoneheardmythoughtsanddecidedtoanswermyquestion,
somethinghardhitmeovertheheadandtheworldaroundmegrewdark.
IdonotknowifIwasreadyfordeath,notthatIwouldbeleavingmuchbehind,but,in
truth,Iwasscared,scaredaboutwhatcameafter.Evenifsomeonefoundourcrashedplanein
themiddleofnowhereandrecoveredthreedeadbodies,whowouldcometotakemehome?
Whowouldattendthefuneral?WouldIberememberedorforgottenintheimmediateyears
aftermydeathbyafamilythatdidnotcare?IguessIwouldnothavetoworrysinceIwouldbe

dead,butitmakesamanwonderaboutsomethingthathecanneverknow.Butbeforewetalk
aboutmydeath,Ihavetodie.
ThesmashedinteriorwasthefirstthingInoticed,allthewindowsweredestroyed,anda
lightsmokefilledthecabin.Everythingfeltweird,andittookmeasecondtocollectmythoughts
andrealizethatIwashangingupsidedownfrommyseatwhosebeltshadheldtrueandkept
mesecure.Ifondledforthelatchbutfoundthatmyhandscouldnotplaceit,andmyattention
wascaughtbyasharppieceofglassthatsatontheroofoftheaircraft.Ireachedoutwincingas
Idiscoveredvariousbruisesandcutsalongbothofmyarmsandgrabbedtheshardcarefulnot
tocutmyselfmorethanIalreadywas.Thoughittookseveraltries,Imanagedtoseverthestrap
andinstantlyregrettedmydecisionasmyheadcrashedintotheroofbelowmewiththerestof
mybodysoonafter.ItookamomenttocollectmyselfinthewreckandrealizethatIhadtoget
outofthecrampedspaceinwhichIwastrapped.Thewindowsweretoosmalltocrawlthrough,
butInoticedaredhandlelabeledEmergencybelowoneofthem.SoIcrawledtowardsthe
lever,andwithwhatstrengthIhadleft,Iyankeditopenonlytofallforwardoutoftheplaneonto
thesoftground.SlowlyImademywayawayfromtheplaneandtowardsatreenottoofaraway
whichIreachedafterquiteabitofeffort.Flippingmyselfover,Isatupagainstthetrunkand
staredatthewreckagefromwhichIhadescaped,thewreckagethatIalonehadescapedI
realized,forwhenIlookedaround,therewerenosignsthatmyothertwocompanionshad
madeitaway.AsIsurveyedthescenebeforeme,anotherthoughtenteredmymind
,Isurvived,
Isurvived,Isurvived.
Therealizationhitme,andIsattherethinkingthatIhadsomethingsome
peopleneverget,achancetomakethingsright,achancetofixthemanythingsthatIhaddone
wronginmylife,
asecondchance.
Imaynotsurvivethedaystocomeinthevastjungle,andI
maynevermakeitbacktocivilizationtorightmymanywrongs,butIhadthe
Chance,f
orIcould
bedeadinthatmetalcageforallmyluckbutIwasnot,IwasherereadytograspthelifethatI
stillhadlefttostartagain,startanewstoryformyself,likeaphotographstillundeveloped.