FREE
11/11/99
WHAT’S GOING WRONG
AT WESTMINSTER?
Cracks in the gloss
The last week in politics has seen
a flurry of reports and pre- reports
as the new season gathers into a
routine. Most prominently has
been the Pre- Budget report by
the Chancellor, Gordon Brown.
The report outlines the ‘new eco-
nomic ambition’ which aims for a
faster rise in productivity to nar-
row the productivity gap between
Britain and it’s competitors. It con-
tains sweeping aims to increase
‘JANET’ clouds UniS in mystery
On Monday night and Tuesday
morning, reports of a strange
phenomenon across the cam-
pus began to circulate - the
cause of which was a bizarre
series of letters appearing on
doors, windows and walls.
‘JANET’ has appeared all over
the place and no one seems to
be able to offer a satisfactory
barefacts@surrey.ac.uk
the number of people in work,
have the majority of school
leavers in further and higher edu-
cation and the national debt will
have £3.5bn paid of it. There are
plans to abolish child poverty
within 20 years and to cut envi-
ronmental pollution by 2m tonnes
a year by 2010. A new task force
to investigate the ‘hidden econo-
my’ will be established, as will a
child poverty fund.
For the unemployed, there will be
an extension of the New Deal
explanation as to the cause of
these sightings.
Barefacts has come up with
several theories as to what
they could be - from the obvi-
ous work of extraterrestrials
though to resident weirdo’s
toying with our fragile little
minds.
News 1-3 n Letters & Welfare Feature 4-6 n Barearts 7-14n
Notices & Regulars 15-18
and a national jobs phoneline.
There are plans for another 50
000 places for IT college cours -
es..
For the elderly there will be the
winter allowance of £100, starting
this year and those over 75 will
receive a free TV license as of
next Autumn. However, Alistair
Darling (Social Security
Secretary) confirmed that pen-
sions would increase by a mere
1.1 % next year, that is an addi-
tional 75p. Age Concern has
Whoever and whatever this
‘JANET’ phenomenon is, it
certainly has everyone on
campus stumped. If anyone
can offer the truth behind the
mystery - please email:
barefacts@surrey.ac.uk.
Watch this space......
AB
n Surrey Pride 19-20
called the proposals “derisory”.
For charities there will be a gov-
ernment ‘donation’ of 28p for
every £1 donated, rising to 50p
for every £1 payroll donation.
The arbitrary duty fuel escalator
will be abolished. Rather than a
set 6% tax escalation each year,
the tax increase on fuel will be
assessed and set ‘budget by bud-
get’, with the money being chan-
nelled back into road mainte-
nance, though ‘earmarking’ of
government funds is somewhat a
wolly promise.
The report over all gave a glowing
picture of a healthy economy, with
faster growth than was forecast
last year and announced a “struc-
tural improvement” of government
finances following tax increases.
However, other reports out in the
days around the report have
shown that the economy is run-
ning on two speeds. There is a
Help us fight
against:
Tuition fees
Poor pay for students
who work
Student Hardship
There will be coaches
leaving from the
University to take you to
London for the march.
n
Issue no: 971
draining of jobs and prosperity
from the North into the South, a
trend that even the ‘natural
descendants’ of a one nation tra-
dition has failed to halt.
The Regional Venture Capital
Fund is the first tacit admission by
ministers that the North South
divide is still growing. Trade and
Industry Secretary Stephen Byers
intends to lure business away
from the over crowded South East
market towards other regions by
enticing them with a ‘marriage’ of
private investment to state assis-
tance, with an expected cost of
hundreds of millions of pounds.
Last week alone saw the North
East loose 1000 jobs, including
the last colliery closing in
Easington. The New Policy
Institute’s report has highlighted
the divide between North and
South. For example the average
s e m i - continued on page 2...
2 11/11/99
Editorial
Andy
This week’s Barefacts is shorter than usual
Keren for one reason alone - cash. Since the
beginning of this semester, Barefacts has
doubled in size in comparison to the previ-
ous two years as a tabloid due to the input
of student writers, editors, increasing the
world news and by developing the music
section into Barearts. This has put a strain
on the BF budget - a budget that was creat -
ed to support a 12 - 16 page paper, not a 20
Honey - 24 page. Barefacts is over 33,000 words a
week in its current form and the 2,700
copies cost just over £1,000 a week to pro -
duce. So why am I telling you all this? Well,
the fact that we’re struggling on the budget
is a good sign - not a bad one. The enthusi-
asm for BF this year has been amazing and
has also allowed us to start work on 5XH
magazine, which will come out at the begin -
Kev ning of December. If you have any ques-
tions, comments or queries about Barefacts
then let us know.
Aside from that, we’re looking for anyone
that wants to write a one-off contribution for
5XH. If you’re interested, email
barefacts@surrey.ac.uk or pop in to the
Monday night meetings at 7pm in the Grant
Mitchell Room.
Jenni
Thanks go out this week to Alan Roy for his
work on the Barefacts PC system, all the
editors and to the sports clubs and soci-
eties that have sent our Sports Editor so
much more than we were getting. Most of
the editing team are off to the NUS Student
Media Conference this weekend to meet
reps from all the other Student media
Liz
across the country as well as attend the
Student Media Awards. We’ll let you know
of the results - although BF was not entered
last year so isn’t up for nomination. Next
year - you never know.
One more thing - if you see that an article of
yours hasn’t been printed in BF it will be for
one of three reasons: a) there was not
Claire enough room for it, b) it has for some rea -
son been edited out c) it has been over-
looked. The Barefacts team do their very
best to get as much information into the
paper as possible - but as one of only 5
weekly student publications in the UK - it is
not unheard of for us to make a mistake
once in a while.
Lindsey Cheers.
Andy Blair
‘JANET’ clouds UniS in mystery.
James
Commercial
Team:
Hannah Jaynes
Orla
Cousins
News In Brief
Death at University of Westminster
A psychology technician has
been found beaten to death
by police officers. Elizabeth
Stacey, a "lapsed physicist
t u r n e d p s y c h o l o g i s t t e c h n i-
cian" was found in a universi-
ty psychology research labo -
ratory after disappearing dur-
ing working hours. She was
last seen alive after getting to
work in the morning, offering
to assist a colleague on a
computer problem. The col-
league, Stephen Reid, a PhD
student at the university has
also not been seen since.
Miss Stacey died from a seri-
ous head injury after a violent
struggle but there were no
How about Criminal Soldiers Then?
The Ministry of Defence has
announced a plan to seek
new recruits from those being
released from prison. The
idea of using convicted crimi-
nals in Her Majesty’s Armed
Forces has sparked huge
debate. The MoD states that
it will only consider those who
have served less than two
years in jail. Furthermore,
anyone guilty of racial, drug
or sexual crime will be sum -
marily rejected.
Critics have said the move
would degrade the profes -
sionalism of the Army.
Soldiers must be motivated
and able to trust one another,
this would be impossible with
former inmates as sqauddies,
they say.
Supporters retort that the
regime in the Army is an insti-
tution well capable of dealing
with young and petty crimi-
nals. It could transform them
into valuable troops they
claim. They also point out
Banana Boat Slips Up
A container ship sustained
serious damage this week
after crashing into a light-
house. The 100,000 tonne
Dole America was on route
from Portsmouth to Antwerp
when it's stern had at 26
metre long disagreement with
the Nab Lighthouse in the
Solent. The collision ripped at
the container ship's hull
resulting in a gaping wound
mostly above the waterline
Two of the ships three holds
took in water and there were
fears of a large oil leak from
the engine room. Lifeboats
from along the south coast
rushed to the scene as the
Bare Facts
Union House
University Of Surrey
Guildford
Surrey
GU2 5XH
Tel: 01483 259275
Fax: 01483 534749
email:
barefacts@surrey.ac.uk
Cracks In The
Gloss
continued from page 1
detached house in London
signs of sexual assault. Miss costs more than £250,000,
Stacey's body was found in a five times more than similar
locked laboratory on the houses in Wolverhampton.
fourth floor of the Regents House prices are rising in
Street buildings, the combi- London and the South East,
nation to which was known by but falling in Scotland.
few people. Also in the room
was the suspected murder The division disparity of the
weapon, an unspecified blunt poor also demonstrates
instrument. The building has regional trends (DSS fig-
had teaching suspended and ures). The North East has
counselling has been offered the highest, at 21% of poor
to students and staff. The household, the South East
homepages of both Miss has the lowest, at 9%.
Stacey and Mr Reid have Conversely the North East
been withdrawn from the uni- takes only 83% of the GDP
versity website. per head on average (the
HBG lowest) whereas the South
East receives 105% of the
GDP per head on average.
Only London has a higher
allocation at 139%, but also
that raising armies from pris- has a high 18% of poor
ons is nothing new. Military households.
service used to be offered to
convicts as an alternative to In the South East unemploy-
imprisonment. ment is falling and stands at
2% (seasonally adjusted), as
There are many different opposed to Merseyside and
views on this subject. If you the North East where it is ris-
would like to discover or even ing and stands at 8.4% and
contribute to them then visit 7.1% respectively. The
the "Talking Point" area of the South East is suffering from
BBC News website: a property boom and labour
http://news.bbc.co.uk/talking- shortages, but the other end
point/soldiers/. Here army of country has stagnant mar-
officers and civilians from kets and disappearing jobs.
both the UK and abroad have
added their opinions to an on- The problem is not just a
line debate. financial one. The areas
worst affected by the divide
This controversy has come are traditional Labour areas,
after a coalition of human and the areas currently in
rights organisations criticised boom are the new Labour,
the British Army for recruiting middle England support
16 year olds. The bases. In short the North
Government refuted any South divide is being hailed
wrong doing then too. It said as the most politically sensi-
the Army's recruitment meth- tive issue Tony Blair has to
ods were well within the face at the moment.
guidelines of the United
Nations. JB
However, it is more likely
that restricting growth in the
South will push more busi-
ness ‘across the channel’
than up to the North. By tak-
crippled ship began to list. ing Scotland as an example
Despite it's terrible scar how- it seems most effective to
ever the Dole America was have higher public spending
not in danger of sinking. The in less favoured areas, fund-
22 strong crew stayed aboard ed by the boom areas under
a n d s e t a b o u t t a k i n g t h e strong regional policy.
freighter to a safe harbour. Twenty years ago it was the
poorest part of the UK, with
The offending lighthouse was a significantly lower GDP
originally built to look out for per head than average. Now
World War 1 submarines. It it is more prosperous than
was converted into a beacon most English regions. The
to guide shipping around the problem needs to be tackled
Isle of White. Coastguards in this season however,
could not explain what had before ‘electoral revenge’ is
g o n e w r o n g . T h e a c c i d e n t committed by the traditional
h a p p e n e d i n c o n d i t i o n s o f Labour areas.
good weather and visibility.
JB HBG
Bare Facts is an editorially independent
newspaper, published by the University of © USSU
Surrey Students' Union Communications
Office. Communications Office
1999
Printed by
The views expressed within the paper are
those of individual authors, and do not nec-
East End
essarily represent the views of the Editor, the
Editorial Board, the University of Surrey Deadline for
Students' Union or the University of Surrey.
This publication may not be reproduced in
whole or in part, stored in any form, copied or
Publication
Offset (TU),
distributed, without the express permission
of the publisher.
Monday 12pm Bow,
All submissions must include the author's
name and Union or Staff Number.
London, E3
Submission is no guarantee of publication.
Anonymous and Pseudonymous articles will
Submissions 3LT
not be published.
preferably on
Bare Facts reserves the right to edit
submissions.
disk
11/11/99
Outrage! for Portillo,
Mugabe and Blair
Outrage!, the gay rights
group, have hit the news
twice this week. Firstly, after
Outrage! Members harassed
Mr. Mugabe's limousine in
October, the Zimbabwe
President has lodged a com-
plaint to the British High
Commissioner in Harare.
Outrage! had selected
Mugabe because of his
human rights record, includ-
ing oppression of gays and
the torture of journalists.
However, Mugabe has react-
ed to the incident by accus-
ing the Blair administration of
'gang ganging' him when his
is in London and has sug-
gested that Blair and his
"government of little men...
are using gangsters on us,
that is the gangster regime
of Blair".
Outrage! have denied being
gangsters, but are overtly
gay. Peter Tatchell (an
Outrage! co-founder) said
that Mugabe was using the
"spectre of homosexuality"
to take attention away from
his own government's eco-
nomic crisis and rising
unpopularity. There was no
comment from the Home
Office.
Secondly Peter Tatchell has
been getting column inches
as OutRage! continues to
'challenge homophobia' and
ambush Michael Portillo on
his by-election campaign in
Kensington. "Our opposition
to Portillo is based on his
support for anti- gay legisla-
tion" explained Tatchell after
being restrained by Portillo's
Taking The Biscuit
The best drink to dunk your
biscuits in is cold chocolate
milk according to research.
The outrageous assault on
the great British tradition of
dunking a digestive in a
cuppa was made this week
by Dr Len Fisher. Dr Fisher
and Bristol University have
been investigating the taste
of biscuits after being dipped
in a variety of beverages.
Biscuit manufacturing giant
McVite's funded the experi-
ments. Last year the compa-
ny sponsored Fisher to
answer the perplexing ques-
tion of what is the optimum
time for of a dunk.
Dr Fisher and his team used
a mass spectrometer to
analyse the air in their nasal
passages as they sipped
drinks and ate biscuits. A
computer then created an
artificial flavour rating based
on the number of odorous
particles present. The air car-
ries smells to the nose where
the more subtle tastes are
experienced. 200 trials were
performed with combinations
of: Digestives, Hobnobs,
minders in Holland Park on
Wednesday. Portillo has
recently reaffirmed his sup-
port for the ban on gays in
the military and has previ-
ously voted against having
an equal age of sexual con-
sent for hetero- and homo-
sexuals.
Kensington constituents are
getting used to having their
candidates sexual activity
interrogated on their streets.
In 1997 Alan Clark (whose
death has led to the by-elec-
tion) was followed through
the Kensington streets by
the South African judge
James Harkess, after Clark
slept with his wife and two
daughters. Portillo, even
after the election results will
be a focus for Outrage! until
he brings into line his admis-
sions of homosexual activity
and the way in which he
votes in the Commons.
If he is elected as Member
for Kensington and Chelsea
he will also find scrutiny from
the media who are already
promoting him as pretender
to the next Prime Minister.
As Andrew Rawnsley com-
mented at the weekend, this
is a goal that can only be ful-
filled "over several dead
bodies". In the meantime
however, it provides easy
targets for tackling homo-
phobia, brings sexual
hypocrisy back onto the
political agenda and gives
OutRage! some much-need-
ed credibility after recent crit-
icism from another gay rights
group Stonewall. HBG
Gingernuts, Caramels
Chocolate Digestives, Rich
Tea and Jaffa Cakes with
tea, coffee, hot/cold milk,
orange juice, orange squash,
lemonade, coke, ice tea hot
chocolate and chocolate
milk.
The researchers found that
digestives and cold choco-
late milk were 11 times tasti-
er than the biscuits alone. "It
went off the scale," said
Fisher about the flavour
level. The other cold drinks
were found to wash away the
flavour however. Lemonade
and Gingernuts were not rec-
ommended. An important
exception was Jaffa Cakes
and orange juice. This star
pairing earned 3 place on in
the taste test. JB
Perhaps McVite's will now
concentrate on producing a
biscuit that softens but does
not disintegrate in mid dunk?
- News Ed JB
Your Letters
Dear Barefacts,
I am writing to point out that not all students at Surrey are inter-
ested in the issues that Barefacts has concentrated on lately. As
a woman I found a lot of the Halloween's issue offensive.
Although personal safety is an important issue, the graffic
details of rape and assult included in the issue were to me, very
offensive.
Equally the sex survey, issues of drug rape, and the pros and
cons of drugs in last week's issue are not issues I feel are help-
ful to all Surrey students.
As a Christian with Christian and non-Christian friends, I do not
see that the important issues in most people's life are sex, drugs
and the occult. I would also like to point out with reference to
Lucy's letter last week that the Bible is not focussed on Sex and
violence either. Its emphasis is on living your life in a moral way
for the benefit of others and not
simply for personal gains.
Yours Aggrieved,
L.L
Company: Heartland (Computing Section)
Job: Creating Websites & Customer Satisfaction Admin
Cast: Mike: Manager
Julie: Customer Satisfaction
Vicky fellow Industrial Trainee (IT)
Continued from last weeks Barefacts…
Week 10
This week another work experience student arrived at Heartland.
Fiona Manaton is to be my responsibility for two weeks. She is prov-
ing to be very keen and inquisitive. As I gave the introductory spiel
to Heartland's and our computing systems she asked excellent
questions. I impressed myself with the amount I knew about both
Heartland and computing in general compared to 3 months ago.
Mike Roberts is keen to give Fiona "real work" rather than the usual
mundane work experience chores. My job doesn't lend itself to del-
egating tasks so Mike has given her things to do. She's very mature,
hard working and already has good IT skills. I have been keeping
an eye on her but mostly getting on with duties relating to customer
satisfaction.
I was fed up with inconsistencies between two sources of informa-
tion I use. They cause me problems every time I try to collate my
data. Eventually I came up with a list of discrepancies, 4 pages long!
Julie was appalled and resolved to sort out the most important
ones.
On Wednesday I woke up and got on a train going away from
London. I was off for a day trip to Heartland's Swindon Office.
3
Dear Barefacts,
I feel that I ought to respond to the letter in last weeks edition
regarding racism on campus. As you will have seen from my let-
ter last week, the article that was published were only rough
notes taken during a conversation with Tony Watling from which
I was going to write a full article. Therefore the reference to
racism was only me noting down what Tony had said. Racism is
not a problem which has been brought to the attention of the
Student Union officers or security but this does not mean that
that the problem does not exist. However we will not tolerate
racism just as we would not accept behaviour that may be dis-
criminating to anyone’s sex or sexual orientation. We are a
University made up of students from all different nationalities, reli-
gion and colour and unfortunately some are too ignorant and will
make comments. There has also recently been many posters
around campus about racism. These people are not profession-
als and are not qualified to help you, unlike the Students’ Union
who have nation-wide resources. These people have also been
contacted but are unwilling to come forward and allow us to help.
The Students’ Union is always looking to recruit volunteers, so if
this is an issue that you are interested in then please contact us.
It is unfortunate if any readers took the comment in the safety
feature to mean that I do not see racism as a problem because
I do see it as a big problem for those who it affects and if anyone
would like to talk to me in confidence about this or any other mat-
ter then please come and see me or email me on E.Sale@sur-
rey.ac.uk.
Emma Sale
Heartland Swindon is a lot more liberated than London. It's not a
customer centre so the atmosphere and dress code are relaxed. I
was there to meet the Telesales Team for our section.
Mike Roberts wants reports on the efficiency of the Telesales Team.
A guy called Peter Deckman showed me a program called
Approach. Approach, I learnt, can generate highly complex, cus-
tomised reports from data in a spreadsheet. I was really quite
impressed with its versatility. Peter was also a great bloke and a
good teacher. He helped me play with Approach until I was com-
pletely at home. My exploration then let me teach him a couple of
things! I then laboured to produce a sample report to show Mike.
I was cheered by a sign that London was missing me. The IT's were
wondering where I was. Vicky phoned me to find out. Later I
received an email from a phantom IT back in London. Dave Betts
has been working at Heartland for two weeks. We had no idea he
existed!
I had also come to Swindon to see Website Manager, Dennis
Jones. I hadn't had time however, so I volunteered to come down
again the next day.
On Thursday then, I returned to Swindon. I reported in to guardian
Vicky and then took up station next to Dennis Jones. He taught me
a lot of new things. I should now be more independent regarding
the website.
I left Swindon feeling like I'd had a mini holiday. The break from
London, in the laid back environment had been both useful and
refreshing. It had been a great week: I had learnt a new program,
gained new abilities and met several new people.
 4 11/11/99
The News In
Briefs
FIELD WORK
PAYS OF FOR
US SCIENTISTS
After a fifteen-year
investigation into the
sexual activities of goats
– scientists at The
University of Fort Worth,
USA have discovered
t h a t g o a t s h a v e i n t e r-
course more regularly
than humans. The tests,
c a r r i e d o u t i n a c o n-
trolled environment, took
place in three large
fields just outside the
University’s research
park. Humans and goats
were bred in these fields
and were studied to see
how their sexual activity
compared in similar
environmental c o n d i-
tions. The results,
spread over a period of
five 3 year stretches,
showed that goats found
sexual intercourse easi-
er in open spaces than
humans, although
humans bred easier than
goats in standard four
poster beds. Over 78%
of goats found frolicking
to be their major past-
time, where as humans
sort a more educated
watching of other peo-
ple’s sex lives as their
primal function in life.
MALAYSIAN POP
QUEEN STUFFED
After several weeks in
the Malaysian Charts,
top-selling act Amy
Mastura has been
advised to take her
album ‘Pujannku’ out of
circulation after fears
that a secret track at the
end of the album had
been ‘overly suggestive
about death and the
occult’. The track in
question came to light
after a young shop
owner had taken the
lyric ‘the afterlife is like
a barnyard, don’t be
afraid, if you want to be
a chicken too, let death
serenade’ a little too lit-
erally. After dressing up
as a chicken and parad-
ing unquestioned
through the streets, the
young man was found
frozen to death in a
fridge full of poultry with
the words ‘Amy Mastura
– let me play in your
barnyard’ written on a
tag around his ankle. A
police statement
addressed the death as
‘bringing the question of
music idols and lyrical
All of the above stories are fictional and do not reflect any
actual events either on or off the University Campus.
Money Talks
££ MONEY TALK$?
By now, you’ve probably noticed the
traditional student stereotype: radical,
intelligent, drunk a lot...and Broke.
March for Education in London. The
Union will be running coaches to this,
so please get involved (if you’re not at
work!)
wallpaper the place (hey - it’s not a bad
idea!) and now somebody’s here telling
you about another lot of money they’re
paying.
Well, Council Tax is a property tax. In
Although the first three are hard to So what can you do now in order to general, students are exempt from pay-
change (and lets face it who’d want ease the money worries - just a bit? ment; all campus and hazel farm
reference to the very top to?), the fourth is up to you. Well, part-time work isn’t such a bad accommodation is automatically
of the social and moral
idea if it’s reasonable work, reasonable excluded from the tax, and by the end
pecking order’.
In 1994, the shadow Secretary of state hours, fair pay, and doesn’t get in the of your first year, you’ll be issued with
for Education and Employment, way of your course. Guildford’s a pretty an exemption certificate so houses
FORMAL APOLOGY referred to student hardship as a good area to find work in - plenty of occupied only by students will also be
FOR ‘SUSPECTED’ “badge of shame” worn by society. This bars and shops; plus students are seen exempt.
ARMED ROBBERS. metaphorical badge is, however, grow- as an enthusiastic and reliable work - Resident landlords are liable to pay
ing, as seen in the recent slump in force! Alternatively, you may also be C.T. If one non-student resides in the
Two men suspected of applications to Higher Education. A able to find work more relevant to your house, the household is liable for 75%
armed robbery were recent report by the National Union of course. of the cost, but if more than one moves
freed this week after Students highlighted some worrying Some students may be able to obtain in, the entire sum must be paid, and all
new evidence came facts; at least 40% of students work Hardship Loans or Access Funds. residents are jointly liable. (This also
before Southwark Crown part-time, but may work for less than These funds exist to aid students facing applies to EIHMS/dietetic students in
Court. Jeff Hamon and the minimum, often in unreasonable exceptional financial hardship, and fur- NHS accommodation).
Colin Berkshire both conditions. 30% admitted to skipping ther information is available from the Exceptions may be available for dis-
received a formal apolo - lectures as a result of part-time work. Student Advice & Information Service, abled students or those with children.
gy for wrongful arrest One in 5 students were found to drop Wey flat 2, Surrey Court. (Tel. 01483
after Metropolitan Police out of University because of hardship, 879261 or ext. 9261). For further information, contact SAIS,
brought forward video and the majority spend over half their or Guildford Borough Council
tapes, finger prints, pic- income on accommodation costs. Council Tax
tures, guns, hair sam - (01483 505050)
ples, hand written notes But we know that, don’t we? Aah! You’ve just moved into a new
of testimony and two 25th November sees the National house. You’ve got enough bills to re-
willing confessors to the
crime which had been –
quote - ‘overlooked’. A
police spokesperson
added ‘ Sorry, er yep, bit
of a f*** up really’.
NO SEATS
HERE
Cinemagoers in
Bracknell were surprised
to find there were no
seats so they went
home.
WORLDS
STRONGEST
MAN WETS HIS
PANTS
Anthony Clarke, the
world’s strongest man,
was at the centre of an
alarming pant wetting
incident at last weeks
‘Man Power’ festival in
Valencia. Anthony,
father of three, messed
his Y’s in front of a
crowd of 2,000 whilst
trying to lift a VW Beetle
full of small children.
E v e n m o r e e m b a r r a s s-
ment was to follow as he
proceeded to laugh
whilst holding the car 7
feet from the ground.
The laughter prompted a
A brief history of the Berlin Wall
breakage of wind and a
May 1945 Nazi Germany surrenders. May 11 1973 Formal re-establishment travel and movement.
subsequent rectal deliv-
Germany is divided into four parts by of diplomatic relations between East
erance into Anthony’s
the US, the UK, France and Russia. and West Germany. October 18 1989 Erich Honecker oust-
a f o r e m e n t i o n e d u n d e r-
ed as East German leader. Egon
wear. This impressive
June 1948 - May 1949 Soviet block- May 2 1989 Hungary removes wire Krenz becomes head of the
display of control and
ade of West Berlin, the Allied sector from border with Austria. Communist Party.
m a s c u l i n i t y w a s u n r i-
remained supplied only by the Berlin
valled in the festival and
Airlift. September 10 1989 Hungary stops November 4 Protest in Alexanderplatz,
the children involved
enforcing East German visa restric - East Germany's main square attracts
inside the car believed
Summer 1952 East Germany closes tions and opens borders. Within 3 1m.
that he was a superb
border with West Germany, except in days 15000 East Germans have
role model and a true
Berlin. crossed through on their way into November 7-8 East's government and
hero.
West Germany. Politburo resign.
AB
August 13 1961 East Germany seals
border and the building of the wall September - October 1989 Weekly November 9 Berlin Wall opens.
begins. demonstrations in East Germany, HBG
demanding reforms and freedom of
 11/11/99 5

Berlin: Onwards and Upwards

Germany was reunited on
Oct. 3, 1990, ending 45
years of division that had
followed World War II. For
Germans, the year revolved
around events that merged
the Federal Republic of
Germany (West Germany)
and the German
Democratic Republic (East
Germany) into one fully
sovereign German state.
For Europeans, German
unification signalled the
end of the Cold War that
had divided post war
Europe into an eastern bloc
backed by the Soviet Union
and a western bloc allied
with the United States. The
front between the two blocs
had run right through
Germany.
The Opening of the Wall
The situation in autumn ‘89
got tense, the people of East
Germany started to demon-
strate and voice their opin-
ions. In response to a call by
the Artists’ Union and Neue
Forum, a demonstration on
4th November on the
Alexanderplatz brought out
nearly a million people, who
whistled at the SED represen-
tatives and called for basic
freedoms. Four days later, the
party leaders resigned en
bloc. But they tried to avoid
the collapse of East Germany
by satisfying one of the
demonstrators’ main
demands, the right to move
around freely.
For this reason, on 9th
November at 18.57, Günter
Schabowski, head of the
Berlin SED and an influential
member of the outgoing
Politburo, announced to
bemused journalists that the
Council of Ministers had just
decided to allow East
Germans to move freely into
West Germany. He added
that the measure was to take
effect " immediately ". The
news spread like wildfire
throughout the city and the
country. In the following hours,
East German citizens in their
thousands flocked to the
crossing points between the
two Berlins. Not having
received precise instructions,
the guards let them through.
After 10,315 days in exis-
tence, the Wall had virtually
come down, even though it
would take another few
months to remove it physical-
ly. The blows from picks at the
Wall, the symbol of the divi-
sion of Europe into two con-
tending blocs, heralded the
final collapse of communism
which took place two years
later with the break-up of the
Soviet Union.
A united Berlin
The city was overcome by a
joyful madness in which
astonishment mingled with
unspeakable joy: "I won’t
believe it until I’m on the other
side " (Ick glob es erst, wenn
icke drüben bin), said one
East Berlin woman. There
were unforgettable scenes of
rejoicing, with shouting, tears,
applause, laughter and
singing. East Germans were
welcomed with flowers.
Rockets went off to the pop-
ping of champagne corks and
lighting of candles. The Wall
was taken by storm by the
crowds singing and dancing.
Coffee and mulled wine were
served to police officers on
either side. The Vopos were
heckled. At Checkpoint
Charlie, every Trabant sound-
ing its horn was hurrayed by
the crowd and its occupants
congratulated. The
Kurfürstendamm was overrun
by a great flood of people and
traffic was prohibited. In the
days that followed, an army of
human " woodpeckers " ham-
mered at the Wall, opening up
bigger and bigger holes in it.
The cellist Rostropovich came
to play Bach at the foot of the
Wall. Long queues formed at
the crossing points and in
front of banks, where the East
Germans were given DM 100
as a welcome gift
(Begrüssungsgeld). They also
formed in front of shops,
especially the big KaDeWe
store - that temple of com-
merce and luxury.
In just three days, West Berlin
took in 2 million East
Germans. On the evening of
10th November, in front of
Schöneberg City Hall, a big
demonstration brought
together Chancellor Kohl,
Foreign Minister Hans-
Dietrich Genscher, the hon-
orary president of the SPD
Willy Brandt, and the mayor
Walter Momper, for whom “the
German people are the happi-
est people on earth”. We as
the German Society of the
University of Surrey want to
commemorate the 10th
anniversary of the wall coming
down. We are grateful to Mr
Bush and Mr Gorbachev that
they made the reunification of
our country possible and thus
put an end to the cold war.
The fall of the wall marked the
beginning of the long, difficult
road to unification. However,
there is still a long way to go,
with us -the young generation-
as the motor of the unification
process. LET’S GO FOR IT!!!!
Thanks to German Soc

Berlin Celebrates The Fall Of The Wall

On Tuesday, Berlin celebrated the
10th anniversary of the fall of the
Berlin Wall - the event which sym-
bolised the end of the Cold War.
The day set off with a service of
thanksgiving for the arrival of
German unity and ended with a
rock concert, which could be heard
from both sides of the defunct bor-
der. Wreaths were laid where the
Wall had been, in memory of the
hundreds of victims gunned down
whilst trying to escape to the West.
The main event of the day was
held in the Lower House of the
German parliament where, among
others, three former world leaders
- German Chancellor Helmut Kohl,
Soviet President Mikhail
Gorbachev, and US President
George Bush - remembered the
collapse of the Wall. They all gave
speeches on their feeling about the
falling of the Wall, and the situation
since German unification. Mr
Gorbachev said that he recognises
that Germany still faces problems
caused by reunification, but he is
confident that they will be resolved.
Ex-President Bush talked about
how he had watched the Wall
being brought down, but said that
the US reaction had had to be
restrained. He said: "Freedom was
literally cascading over the with the intention of keeping East west and 9.9% nationally. former East German leader Egon
Wall...but an arrogant move on our Berliners in East Germany. Krentz lost his appeal against his
part could have destroyed the joy Whilst last-minute party prepara- conviction for the manslaughter of
and set back the cause for which However, 10 years on, despite tions were being made on Monday people shot dead trying to cross
so many people had worked, bled bleak memories of communism, night, German courts were also the Berlin Wall.
and even died". German some people have become disillu- dealing with issues of the past. The KE
Chancellor Gerhard Schroeder sioned with life
said: "The Wall was brought down, in reunified
not by Washington or Moscow, but Germany. The
by courageous people from the end of com-
East. It was brought down by tears m u n i s m
of joy and the process of unity was brought more
irreversible". He also said that the problems -
events on 9th November 1989 had most notably
created a second chance for u n e m p l o y-
Germany and Europe to achieve ment and the
democracy and peace. Another increased cost
German anniversary was also of living.
remembered in the speeches - the Those prob-
Kristallnacht on 9th November lems were
1938, when Nazis destroyed more underlined on
than 250 synagogues throughout Tuesday 2nd
Germany in a powerful attack November
against the Jews. w h e n
Germany's lat-
For 28 years, the Berlin Wall cut est unemploy-
through the city, dividing families ment figures
and friends. The East German w e r e
Government called it an anti-fas - announced.
cist protection barrier, whilst for the The figure for
West, it was an extremely chilling the old East
symbol of the Cold War. Deterrents Germany is
such as watch-towers, search- 16.9%, com-
lights and automatically-triggered pared to only
guns were all set up on the Wall, 8.2% in the

Ten years of change

February 1989 committee due to corruption charges. ment from Bonn to Berlin.
The 77th and last person to die whilst crossing the wall is a
young East German. December 8th 1989 October 16th 1994
Former Communist party chief, Erich Honecker, is charged Kohl's centre-right coalition retains power at the general
November 9th 1989 with abuse of office, corruption and personal enrichment. election.
There is an announcement that visas are to be freely issued
to East Germans wishing to travel to the west, making the October 2nd 1990 September 27th 1998
wall an instant anachronism. The German Democratic Republic ceases to exist and a A centre-left coalition led by Gerhard Schroeder's Social
Unified Germany is reborn. Democratic party sweeps to power , ending Helmut Kohl's
November 10th 1989 16-year rule.
The gates open at midnight and people take pickaxes to the December 2nd 1990
wall. The greatest one-day movement of people ever known Helmut Kohl returns as chancellor after the first post-unifica- April 19th 1999
in Europe begins. tion elections. The shift of power to Berlin is completed with the opening of
Norman Foster's rebuilt Reichstag.
December 3rd 1989 June 20th 1991
Resignation of politburo and the Communist party central The Bundestag votes by a narrow margin to move parlia- KE
 6 11/11/99
Remembrance Day
The 11th hour of the 11th
day of the 11th month - a
time to take a moment and
reflect on all who gave
their lives for the good of
mankind. For those who
are are unaware of this
custom, this particular
time is set aside for a two
minute silence in which
we think about all those
brave men and women
who took part in the 1914-
18 war.
The poppy is also very
much in evidence today.
Many people wear the
poppy as a sign of remem-
brance for those who died
in France and Belgium. It
Curry School
As a truly multicultural uni-
versity, we should appre-
ciate the importance of
National Curry Day last
Tuesday. Thames Valley
University, however, have
gone one step better,
introducing the UK's first
curry academy. The main
aim of the Academy of
Asian Culinary Arts is to
keep the skills of Asian
cooking alive. There will
be demonstrations from
celebrity chefs, in-house
training fro restaurants
and a certificate and diplo-
is also now a recognised
emblem for all those killed
whilst fighting. Why the
poppy? The first connec-
tion between poppies and
battlefields was first made
in the early 19th century
when a writer remarked
that fields that were bar-
ren before battle, explod-
ed with the blood-red flow-
ers after the fighting had
ended. The poppy has
since become a symbol of
remembrance for the mil-
lions who have died in bat-
tle. In many of the coun-
tries affected by the hor-
rors of war, artificial pop-
pies are sold to raise
ma in Asian food prepara-
tion and cooking. The
South Asian culinary
industry has apparently
undergone massive
expansion in the UK, and
the academy has been set
up in response to a skills
shortage.
It could even be said that
curry is now the UK's
national dish, and funding
for the academy came
from none other than the
Government Skills
Challenge Fund. Fara
money for ex-servicemen
and women's charities.
Many people now do not
realise the full horror of
that tragic time, and per-
haps are unaware of the
importance of what these
brave, magnificent people
did for us. Remembrance
Day is not about who won
the war, it is about those
who were killed fighting for
their freedom.
Everybody must make
their own choice, but per-
sonally I feel that it is the
least we can do to pay
them our respects.
JH
Carty, a spokeswoman
from Thames Valley
University, said that 'The
Asian food market needed
this facility. The younger
generation of Asian peo-
ple often choose not to
join the family business
and work in the industry,
so skills are not passed
on. It's a way of maintain-
ing the traditions, such as
knowledge of blending
spices and mixing ingredi-
ents.'
JH
Nightline – not all hard
work!
Following our AGM on
Thursday, it was time for a
bunch of insomniacs….er.... I
mean Nightliners to hit the
town. Everyone involved in
Nightline has been working
exceptionally hard, so it
seemed fair to take a night
off, especially following the
success of our AGM. New
committee members we
have recruited include a 'rota
officer' and new 'social offi-
cer' i.e. more exciting social
events to come! We do apol-
ogise to all that found the
office closed on Thursday
night. We aim to open every
weekday night from 8pm till
late, but in an instance when
you cannot contact us, we
urge you to either leave a
message on the answer
phone, drop a note in our
pigeon hole (in the Union) or
try again another night.
The social was great fun and
gave everyone a chance to
mingle away from the claus -
trophobia of campus. As the
night continued the conver-
sation developed from
'claims to fame' (watch out
for the next series of
'Supermarket Sweep!') to
how to pronounce strange
Welsh towns after you have
had a few too many drinks.
An unnamed Nightliner sug-
gested that a 'useful' publicity
stunt could involve
Nightliners getting on the
Union stage one FNO and
performing a 'Steps-type'
routine whilst hurling con-
doms in the air! (Can't see
that getting any votes at the
next meeting. )
I expect many of you (esp.
the freshers) are aware that
Nightline is rather short on
condoms at the
moment...well actually we
have run out! Unfortunately,
due to cuts in the NHS we
were unable to receive our
normal quota. However fear
not, and before you declare
celibacy, we are trying to pur-
chase a new supply...hope-
fully before the Christmas
parties get underway.
Annually, Nightliners spend a
training day with the
Samaritans. This is due to
take place in the next couple
of weeks, therefore if there
are still any caring individuals
out there, who have some
spare time and feel they can
help, then please contact us
A.S.A.P. Anyone interest-
ed?? Our weekly meetings
are held in TB12a on
Thursdays at 6pm.
Alternatively you could drop
by the office (between
Wandle and Wey of Surrey
Court) during opening hours.
Brad is Back!
8 News
News
Robbie Williams recently shocked
3,000 fans in the U.S.A by walking
onto the stage completly naked
with only his bear hands for mod-
esty
Return to the fold with a brand new
album since 1993’s ‘The Spaghetti
Incident’ will be released in early
2000 and is expected to be called
‘Chinese Democracy’. Their first
track will be released on the ‘End
Of Days’ soundtrack at the end of
November.
Fatboy Slim is one of the fastest
11th November 1999
earning multi millionaires in the celebrating the much loved sci fi week.
music industry. In a recent report, series, Dr Who. Orbital will be
Kevin Marston
the DJ/producer is said to have providng the some of the music for
made approximately £10 million the night.
mainly due to the international suc -
cess of his ‘You’ve Come A Long Winner of the
Way, Baby’. Freq Nasty
The Offspring will allegedly be Competition
On Saturday 13th November
playing the Garage in London in Stefanio Predieri
preparation for their appearance at
BBC2 will be having a theme night
the European MTV awards this

GAME REVIEWS The Mikado

Sponsored by Capital Technology, High St, Guildford
Well, as far as racing games
go - and there are plenty of
them - Sega Rally 2 is definite-
ly a fantastic outing for those
who enjoy lots of cars driving
through lots of environmental
hazards. The graphics are
very smooth, showing off
Sega’s new machine and the
game play almost equals.
There are enough levels of dif-
ficulty to keep you amused for
a quite a while and the sensi-
tivity of the new Sega joypad
certainly makes controlling the
cars a bit of an art form. The
additional drivers wheel would
be good if you can afford it -
but all it all, if you like Rally
games and you like pant wet-
ting graphics in general then
the combination of machine
GTA2
(PC) £29.99
For those who liked the
origingal GTA, you will love
GTA2. The basic plot is the
same, perform different
missions to gain cash to
progess through the game.
What makes GTA2 differ-
ent however is the gang element. The
Zaibatsu control the city but you can gain 'respect' from one
of the 3 gangs. Walk into the Loonies district and kill their
gangsters, speed off asap and head to another district and
hey presto - you've got the other gang's respect and they'll
give you jobs.These missions are harder than the first GTA
but not too hard to put off new players.
The artificial intelligence of GTA 2 has also greatly increased.
You steal a car and you will find its owner pulling you out of
the vehicle and starting a fight with you. Steal a cab, and
some poor guy will get in and you can drive them round as
the meter clocks up! The police also appear a lot faster but
you can dispense of them by driving into a gang HQ and let-
ting them sort them out for you. You can also now save your
game (for a price) which is a feature many thought GTA
should have had.
All in all, the enhanced graphics, sound and AI and the great
playability of GTA2 will ensure that this game does well for
the Christmas period.
Overall 4 out of 5 (Ben Mac)
Game supplied by Capital Technology, High Street,
Guildford.
For more information on the latest
releases see Graham or Paul at
Carl Rosa Opera Company
New Victoria Theatre, Woking
tive as Katisha and Liza Pullman made a
very tasty Yum-Yum.
One thing with which I was not impressed
was the orchestra under the baton of Ian
Whenever anyone mentions Gilbert and McMillan. They were simply playing
Sullivan operettas to me, I feel a compul- through the music, as if they were waiting
sion to say “oh not again”. It is not that to be paid, caring none for the subtlety of
they are bad operettas, but they are all too phrasing possible with Sullivan’s music,
often produced badly and hammed up while McMillan was merely carving his way
beyond belief. But on Friday night I saw through
something quite different. the evening.
The Carl Rosa Opera Company presented Despite this it made for a very enjoyable
a fresh, vivacious, spirited production of evening, a far cry from all the pompous G
‘The Mikado’, which contained none of the & S carry-ons I have experienced in the
stuffy Victorian pomposity which G & S past. It was the originality of the cast
has reeked of in the past. There was of which made this so entertaining, and
course a certain illustrious charm that is moreover the ability for the production to
part and parcel of G & S, and when the stand on its own, rather than being reliant
famous tunes came along the whole audi- on tradition. It does make me wonder how
ence grinned with excitement. Memorable other companies have been allowed to put
was the ‘Three Little Maids from School’ on lesser productions for so long. It is this
and ‘The Lord High Executioner’. standard of performance to which all G &
Of the cast, I felt that Ivan Sharpe (as S Companies should strive.
Nanki-Poo) was a little wooden, and often Oliver Parker
more of a Mumbling Minstrel than a wan-
dering one. This was compensated for by
Gareth Jones, who was a wonderful Pooh-
Bah, and Eric Roberts (who also directed)
as Ko-Ko. Roberts stole the show, ham-
ming-it-up as if he were in panto, having
the audience rolling in the aisles. The
highlight of the show was the aria ‘They’re
on the List’, where he altered the words to
include references to sewage-reared meat,
mobile
phones, the internet, and a certain White
House Intern. In the second act Roberts
demonstrated his ability for touching
poignancy with his rendition of ‘Willow, Tit-
Willow’. Jill Pert was dramatically effec-
Spielberg’s greatest thriller, Duel.

OFU
Russell is a sophisticated man This film stars Orson Welles as
and game with not disappoint. Capital Technology in the High St. from the east coast of the U.S. William Randolph Hearst who is a
8/10 who gets a new Jeep and drives newspaper tycoon who is accused
Capital
across the south-west. All is well of wrecking the American dream.
until the stupid Jeep breaks down. This film is an excellent explo-
What happens next is probably ration of a citizen.
GIGS THIS WEEK: one of the stupidest things ever.
Russell lets his wife played by
This film deserves its legend sta-
tus because it amazes and
12th-17th November 1999 Kathleen Quinlan get in a truck
with a stranger played by JT
delights fromthe opening shot of
the forbidding gate of Xanadu to
Thursday 11th: Quickspace@ The Garage, London Oscar Film Unit Walsh, whilst he stays with the the last glimpse of the vanishing
BREAKDOWN 14/11 LTG 8PM car. The twist comes when he Rosebud. It may not appear ini-
Friday 12th: Coldcut @Empire Theatre, London CITIZEN KANE 17/11 LTG 8PM manages to repair the jeep, catch tially as good as some of Orson’s
This week we are showing one of up with the truck only to find she later film concerning power.
Voodoo Glow Skulls @ LA2 London
the greatest films ever made. isn’t their and the driver knows However the beauty of this film is
Wheat @ University of London Union
This is Citizen Kane. OFU’s film nothing about her or the situation. that it manages to get better and
Jools Holland @ Brighton Centre
this week isn’t quite this good but better each time you watch it. A
Sugar Plum Fairies @ The Barfly,
is still a spectacularly realistic film. This film is realistic, it places an truly great film showing at a truly
Camden London
This is Breakdown. To watch everyday man in a situation that great University Cinema. You will
either of these films you can either could happen to anyone. Kurt not regret watching 119 minutes of
Saturday 13th: Blondie @ London Arena
use your season ticket or if you do Russell plays his role very well, it one of the greatest films ever.
David Devant @ LA2, London
not have one then all you have to could well be the best perfor- Lets get rid of Blockbuster Bullshit
Morrissey @ The Forum, London
do is put your name on the list in mance of his career. JT Walsh once and for all. Now on to some-
Sunday 14th: SNL@The Union the union post room and then also is very good in one of his last thing more serious. We need
come along to the film and pay celluloid trips. The only thing that more volunteers to help at films.
Monday 15th: Morrissey @ The Forum, London your money. Which is 2.50 for detracts from an otherwise good Talk to us at the films if you want
OFU films (Sunday) and 2.00 for film is the ending which is rather to find out more. Please come or
Basement Jaxx @ The Event, Brighton
Arts films (Wednesday). OTT. Andy Gale will start crying
Tuesday 16th: Raissa @ Camden Dingwalls, London Ben Price
Breakdown stars Kurt Russell who The Arts film this week is Citizen
Flaming Lips @ Wedgewood Rooms,
has appeared in some classic Kane, this was directed by and *made up by me, 1999
Portsmouth
movies such as Escape from New stars the legend that is Orson
York, Backdraft and Overboard Welles. This black and white film
Wednesday 17th: Nothing much woorth seeing
with his partner Goldie Hawn. made fifty-eight years ago is
The other main star is JT Walsh regarded as one of the best, if not
who sadly passed away recently, the best film of all time. Christy
this was a sad loss to movie mak- Love from the Reader’s Wives
ing. section of Escort states that it is
one of the most moving films she
Breakdown is a basic retread of has ever viewed.*
 11th November 1999
Heavens Above..
it’s Angelica!
After Barefacts had watched Brassy play
Dingwalls during Camdemonium. We
decided to talk to an impressed Angelica
in a back corridor blocking a fire exit.
SO HOW DID YOU THINK YOUR GIG
EARLIER WENT?
C: Surprisingly well.
B: Absolutely crazy.
HOW DOES IT COMPARE TO OTHER
GIGS YOU’VE DONE?
B: The last place we played was really
obscure. We were in Coventry with two
local bands who though it would be funny
to have semi naked women dancing with
them.
R: Just not funny.
B: They were doing all these sexual posi-
tions.
H: They had a song called Doggy Style, it
was disgusting.
C: Snoop Doggy Dog had an album
called that.
WHO IS THE WORST BAND YOU’VE
SUPPORTED?
C: Spank Frenzy! They were so dodgy,
Lyrics Test
It’s Sixties week, so here are some of the biggest
singles of 1960s. Not that I know anything about
the Sixties, but at least I didn’t have to listen to
local radio this week.
1) Take a sad song and make it better
2) I thought love was more or less a giving thing
3) If I could stick a knife in my heart, suicide on
stage
4) And the sweet secret of the summer place is
that it’s everywhere
5) I know a man ain’t supposed to cry, but I can’t
keep these tears inside
6) You know someone said that the world’s a
stage and each must play his part
7) It’s a dirty story of a dirty man and his clinging
wife doesn’t understand
8) You’re gonna be sorry you were ever born,
‘cos he’s awful big and he’s kind of strong
9) Everything you think, do and say is in the pill
you took today
10) Silly girl, shame on you your mama said,
you’re crying in bed
Explosive
Super Furry Animals/High Llamas
Guildford Civic Hall
29th October 1999
7.50pm, Guildford Civic Hall is practically
empty when The High Llamas come
onstage. Sean O’Hagan was right; the
average age of the tiny crowd is around the
mid-teens. Although they’re quite accom-
modating, one can’t help wondering if
they’re actually paying attention, which is a
Interview & Lycris Test 9
they were all accountants. R: And we like gigging.
B: Cast were the worst band we’ve ever
supported. We’ve played so many awful
B: They were trying to get
number one hits out of us
Photo: Andrew Thomas
support slots in our 5 years it’s hard to and we’re not interested in
choose just one. that.
C: Some gigs were just so obscure. H: We’d show them songs
We’ve played in farms to redneck townies and they’d say they wouldn’t
expecting strippers! They cut off a pigs make the top twenty. We
head and stuck it down the toilet! realised then we were with
B: We played in Olston, highest place in the wrong manager.
England or something. That was interest-
ing. Really, London’s quite normal, up HOW IS IT BEING PER-
north places are so obscure. CEIVED AS A “GIRL BAND”?
B: I wouldn’t say we’ve got thing.
STEVE LAMACQ IS A BIT OF A FAN where we are because we’re a girl band.
ISN’T HE? Record companies aren’t interested in DO YOU FEEL YOU HAVE A RESPON-
C: He’s been playing the new single, he’s music anymore, just image. That saddens SIBILITY THEN?
still playing our old jingle! me greatly. H: No.
R: It’s not what we’re about. We like our B: But there is a responsibility when
SO WHY THE WAIT? record deal because they genuinely care young kids are involved. We’ve all been
R: We took a year off. about music. through childhood and being teenagers
B: Bad management. B: The industry is about listening to music and you can be very influenced at that
H: We had to practise every day for a with your eyes. time. I remember being influenced by
year. Our manager told us to do it so we’d R: Looking instead of listening. what I listened to and what people said in
sound great. We did it for a year and C: There are some fantastic bands out interviews. You shouldn’t say it’s really
thought “fucking hell this is shit”. there though. cool to shag lots of people and take loads
R: They wouldn’t let us gig at all. of drugs.
H: After a year we said no, sacked them, SUCH AS.... R: Kids might do it.
got pissed, and started playing! C&B: Brassy! C: If I go and see a band I want to read
B: And we met Dennis (the new manag- H: Why base a band on their gender? about them and see what their views are.
er). Brassy are two girls and two blokes so H: What’s good about us is that we don’t
C: Before him we’d done one sodding gig are they are girl band or a boy band? just appeal to young kids, we’re harder
the whole year. Does it matter? It should be about if now.
they’re a good band or
11) Every morning at the mine you could see not. Some girl bands are 10 YEAR OLDS HAVE TO RELY ON
him arrive, he stood 6’6 and weighed 245
12) How do you think someone who has taken
good, some are shitty! THEIR PARENTS TO BUY RECORDS
Same for the boys. FOR THEM SO POP BANDS HAVE TO
you from crayons to perfume
BE “SAFE”.
13) You are my candy girl and you got me wanti- TEEN BANDS ARE B: Although we don’t swear on stage I
ng you VERY MUCH IN FASH- don’t think we’d be considered “safe”.
14) Left my home in Georgia, headed for the ION AS PRODUCTS C: I swore on stage once.
‘Frisco bay FOR THE CHARTS, H: We don’t have a responsibility to any-
15) What did you do there? We got high WHICH ARE NOW one at all, we’re in a band and that’s it.
CONTROLLED BY THE (band break down into debate on if they
Last week’s answers SPENDING OF 8 YEAR are responsible for anyone, 4 simultane-
OLDS, WHAT DO YOU ous voices do not translate well to tape...)
1) Christina Aguilera - Genie in a bottle THINK OF THIS? H: We like playing music, we’re not more.
2) 5ive - Moving up B: It’s a bad thing. B: I can’t stand the way Nirvana glamor-
3) Geri Halliwell - Lift me higher C: I really hate Lolly and ised depression though. I was really influ-
4) Housewife - My Salami that “Mickey” song. enced by that and that’s a bad thing.
5) Emma Bunton & Tin Tin Out - I am what I am H: I don’t even know Music should be important to you, but I
6) Green Day - Good Riddance what’s in the charts. don’t think you should romanticise bad
7) George Michael - Too funky B: I listen to Radio 4. lifestyles.
8) Lightening Seeds - Pure H: It’s true the whole
9) Honeyz - Never let you down chart is aimed at eight At which point we’re moved on for “being
10) Hurricane #1 - Step into my world year olds ‘cos they’ll buy a fire hazard”, contact Angelica though
11) TLC - Unpretty whatever because Dennis at 88 Marlborough Road,
12) Destiny’s Child - Bug a boo they’re so young. Romford, Essex, RM7 8AJ.
13) Shania Twain - Man, I feel like a woman B: But they’re not aware
14) Radiohead - Fake plastic trees of the politics really. By Andy Thomas
15) Manics - If you tolerate this. C: But that’s the whole
shame really. The High Llamas produce hands and leaping
some lovely music, cool & breezy with a
high feel-good factor. It’s refreshing to see
bodies remains con-
stant throughout the
a band that doesn’t storm onstage like entire set, it’s as if
they’re the best thing since sliced bread, they’re competing with
and bash out forty minutes of bog-standard the band on the enthu-
guitar-rock crap. There’s a neat, layered siasm front. The band
structure to the sound, but never any clut- does manage to slow
tering. Lots of instruments and many differ- things down every now
ent styles too, each song individual from and again with a few
the rest. An invigorating epic at the end slowies. SFA are
and it’s over, quite quickly. Unfortunately, capable of writing great
their set has passed over many heads, but guitar grooves, but
in a few individuals, it’s massaged the mind their strength lies in the
and stirred the soul. odd, yet strangely
There’s been a bomb-scare in town beautiful ballads
tonight, but the only explosion is at the (‘Turning Tide’, ‘Some
Civic as Super Furry Animals launch them- Things Come From
selves into their set. No prisoners tonight, Nothing’). No brass
they’ve gone for it by bombarding the audi- section tonight, proba-
giant alien-like creatures walking onstage
ence with a string of heavy-hitting tunes bly the reason why ‘Northern Lites’ is
(must be seen to be believed). No flaws
(‘Bad Behaviour’, ‘Do Or Die’, ‘She’s Got absent from the set list, but the ever-excel-
tonight, just simply magnificent. Arguably
Spies’). The Super Furries have always lent ‘Demons’ still manages to gently
one of the best gigs in Guildford…ever.
been consistent, knocking out songs which caress the heart without it. No encore
shine with a certain madcap quality. They either, but who needs one when your set
Andrew Smith
remain as one of the best small bands ends with triumphant live versions of ‘Ice
around; original, upbeat and great onstage. Hockey Hair’ and the infamous ‘The Man
It doesn’t take long for the crowd to go Don’t Give A Fuck’, which spectacularly
absolutely flippin’ mental either, the sea of rolls into a tripped out dance-theme with
10 Music Reviews 11th November 1999

to disjointed samples. All very Wow. This album is a welcome

ALBUMS experimental. 9/10 I.P.

T STEVENS – The Ultimate

ROYAL TRUX - Veterans Of
Disorder (Domino)
This album is rather more gentle
than expected, six years ago they
just made a racket and the best
thing about them was that they
antagonised an idiot in the crowd.
Now however they have made a
minor masterpiece of psychedelic
rock. Jennifer and Neil do the
vocals with Jennifer’s gruff voice
on superb form. They seem to
have influences from everywhere,
60’s, country, early 90’s indie. And
just when you think you’ve got a
grip on the album something new
comes up and leaves you thinking
where the hell did that come from.
There is a lot of variation in the
music with some standard guitar
Collection
Cat Stevens is somebody whose
records should be in amongst any
record collector’s worth his salt…
All the songs which have made
this man a legend are present on
this massive 24 track album, from
the number 2 hit in the UK ‘I Love
My Dog’ to the classic
‘Moonshadow’, from ‘Teaser and
the Firecat’ which gained him
superstar status to the moving
‘Little Ones’ dedicated children of
Dunblane and Sarajevo… buy this
album and enjoy the music of one
of the finest artists of the century.
8/10 J.R.H
COUNTING CROWS – This
Desert Life (Geffen)
return to Counting Crows 1993
‘August and Everything After’ style
and is happily less jangly and gui-
tar based than their last album
‘Recovering the Satellites’. More
mellow with occasional country
twangs, Adam Duritz has crafted
another selection box of classics.
‘Colourblind’ from the soundtrack
of summer movie, ‘Cruel
Intentions’ is the most beautiful
song to ever be written around two
chords, and ‘Amy Hit the
Atmosphere’ tugs at the heart-
strings in its own little way. The
new single, ‘Hangin around’ is in
the Crows’ jovial, bouncy “please
let me get into the charts” style but
if you enjoyed oldies such as ‘Mr
Jones’ and ‘Rain King’ then you’ll
love it. 8/10 L.A.
Album of the Week
PERRY FARRELL - Rev (Warner
Bros)
Perry Farrell has returned with a
compilation of all his previous
guises for the beloved fans and it
is spectacular with its revamped
and reworked songs blasted out
to the full. Classic tracks from his
Jane’s Addiction days such as
‘Been Caught Stealing’ from the
album Ritual de lo Habitual and
‘Jane Says’ from Nothing
Shocking. While ‘Kimberly Austin’
and ‘Tahitian Moon’ from ‘Good
God’s Urge’ are just beautiful tracks by his other guise, Porno For
Pryos. Rev just relives the greatest moments of his career while the
two new tracks on the album ‘Rev’ and ‘Whole Lotta Love’ are just
dittos of songs compared to the rest and of course ‘Whole Lotta Love’
is a cover of the classic Led Zeppelin tune. Not just a brilliant gap
filler but a wonderful historic outlook. 8/10 K.M.

FOO FIGHTERS - There Is Nothing Left To Lose (RCA)
New band mates for Dave Grohl, which adds a new element to the
equation as ‘There Is Nothing Left
To Lose’ is an enjoyable taste of
the world of Foo. ‘Breakout’ is very
reminiscent of the Foo’s first album
while ‘Learn To Fly’ brings you up
to speed to the slightly new direc-
tion. ‘Generator’ and ‘Headwires’
are exquistly crafted for the new
generation of grunge, which cap-
tures Dave Grohl’s voice in a
phase of transition to a more lo fi
sound. An addition to anyone’s
CD collection. 8/10 K.M.
BARRY WHITE – Staying Power The king of love is back. The pas-
(Arista) sionate numbers will dazzle, enter-
tain and see to your every need
with the usual slick lyrics, saucy
lines and classic love tunes.
Touching on love, relationships
and reflections, ’Staying Power’ is
an album crammed to bursting
with White traits simply because
every word, note and pulse is pre-
cisely crafted for maximum plea-
sure and satisfaction… The king is
back. Let him sit on his throne!
8/10 O.C
MAJOR FORCE WEST – 93-97
(Mo’Wax)
Major Force West have appeared
under many different guises since
their creation in 1988. The two
founding members – Toshio
Nakanishi and Masayuki Kudo –
have remained the project’s co-
ordinators throughout, but the con-
cept is of a loose ‘collective’, so
there have been many collabora-
tions, perhaps most notably with
DJ Milo from Bristol. This, then, is
a compilation of material, much of
which was previously very hard to
obtain, from 1993 to 1997. At
once, the fusion of Indian ethnic
instruments with hip-hop emerges,
but it soon becomes their own
breed of dark, moody hip-hop.
Warped and freaky jazz combines
with fearsome samples and elec-
tronic kookiness on ‘Cup of Tea’
and ‘Heavy Loaded Head’, while a
more dark, minimal style becomes
evident on tracks like ‘America
2000’ and ‘Soup or Salad’. This is
an eclectic, often brilliant collection
of work, proving beyond doubt that
Major Force West do indeed
deserve to be termed ‘legendary’.
7/10. A.M.
V/A - Soulfood ( C o o k i n
records)
The album contains crazy tunes
by Blame, Bjorn, Odyssey and Blu
Mar Ten which create an album full
of chilled and spiced grooves
which would heat up the coolest of
dance floors. This eclectic, fuson-
istic compilation is funky, jazzy,
groovy and has enough hip hop
blood pumping through its bulging
veins to keep your soul hot. 7/10
C.H.

JEPP – Seven - Eleven (Virgin) Perhaps less

From the midwest of the USA, catchy and TAFKAP – Rave Un2 The Joy
Jepp’s guitar driven sound cap- definitely less Fantastic (Arista)
tures a rich melting pot of emo- commercial, The little one returns with this new album.
tions, sounds and stories. The but then again There is no new radical change in direction
album combines personal experi- what would here which one, would might accept for a
ence and tales of modern living you expect career the length of his. However TAFKAP
with a hefty dose of originality, wit from a right- g i v e s u s t h e u s u a l d i e t o f l i t t l e f u n k n u m -
and astute lyrical observations. eous babe. bers. While there are some good songs on
From the incredibly catchy open- The album here such as ‘The Greatest Romance Ever
ing track ‘Baby’ to the mellow, c o n t a i n s Sold’ the album is not going to gain the
softly spoken ‘Tattoo’, this is def- many an popularity which he had with ‘Purple Rain’
initely an artist to look out for. 7/10 excellent and ‘1999’. The album also features sever -
O.C piece of work a l g u e s t a r t i s t s s u c h a s S h e r y l C r o w , C h u c k
from little miss D and Gwen Stefani from No Doubt.
INCUBUS Album (Epic) Di Franco and However these artists do not bring their
Mr. Gillespie may tell you rock is her acoustic characteristics to the music, and spend too
dead, but Incubus tell you other- guitar and I much time trying to sound like TAFKAP.
wise within the first 4 seconds of would thor- 5 / 1 0 A . S .
‘Album’. There’s metronomic oughly recom-
drums, fuzzed guitars, crunchy mend it . It’
bass, a bit of a decks thing and a also quite
voice straight out of Live. So amusing to
there’s not much politics on here, hear Ani slate
but there are plenty of feelings. the great old
As seen on the Family Values tour U.S.A and
they can rawk with the big and proclaim her
hard boys, but here they can chill intent to leave
out too. And whilst it doesn’t get and go and live in Canada. Go songs sound quite promising at
self- indulgent there’s a hint of Ani, Go Ani -Go! 7/10 C.H. first, but the flat vocals and repet-
miserablism that keeps it all on itive guitar-strumming eventually
the dark side. It’s a perfect stereo- JEFF MUELLER – Fold and begin to crawl under your skin.
hugger, and although is erring on Perish (Monitor) This is music that probably has
the side of over production is One man and his guitar, Jeff loads of emotion under the sur-
easy on the ears of rock. Hardly Mueller takes time off between face, but it’s hard to find when the
groundbreaking, it fits comfortably recording and touring with his surface is more impenetrable
with what everyone is doing with- bands to produce this solo, main- than my Mum’s custard. 2/10
out being generic. Brings a little ly acoustic mini-album (seven A.T.S.
black hole sunshine to the day. blues-style tracks, grimier than a
7/10 H.B.G tramp’s grimy bits). Many of the

Ani Di Franco - To the Teeth This week’s reviews by;

(Righteous Babe records)
Ani di Franco is one of v. few
great female solo artists.
Although she is much less well
known then, for example Alannis
Morissete her music is better.
Al Mooney, Adam Saxty, Andrew Smith, Nick Walsh, Ian
Purvey, Honey Barter Godfrey, Rob Winder, Kevin
Marston, Daniel Cremin, Gareth Nolan, Lisa Thornhill,
Amanda J Taylor, Oliver Chamero, Andrew Deegan, Matt
Ward, Andrew Thomas, Thomas Morgan. & Lucy Andrews
 11th November 1999 Singles & Live Reviews 11
touch of electronica… an impres-

SINGLES sive debut. Imagine Soundgarden

re-mixing Beck’s ‘Odelay’ and you
will have an idea of what this
WHEAT – Don’t I Hold You (City sounds like. 7/10 J.R.H
Slang)
Subtle melodies with simple effec- ZIPPER J – Success Ambition
tive lyrics creating an air of calm. (Humbug Reports)
Similar to Mogwai but with vocals. A zippy little number this one,
A very relaxing song. 9/10 M. W. from this the second in the series
of unsigned album. It’s the first of
SOULWAX – Too Many DJs probably many songs to be
(PIAS) released about the new millenni-
Scorching guitar grooves with a um. 7/10 A.S.
Hmmmmm!
STEREPHONICS Hurry Up And Wait
(V2)
Argh! The 47th single from
‘Performance and Cocktails’, which you
should either already have and there-
fore dislike this single as it’s the weak-
est song from an average album, or
you won’t have P&C because you don’t
like the ‘Phonics and will therefore dis-
like this too. Either way, just avoid it.
4/10 H.B.G
MUCHO MACHO FEAT JOHN
LUCIEN -Easy Living (Wiiija)
Loose and laid back, blissfully
Single of the Week
crooning about easy living, yeah,
tica boom, tica boom bam bah.
GARBAGE - The
Yeah, baby, I like it like that. Very
World Is Not Enough
chilled beat fusion, starring Lucien
(MCA)
- jazz fusion wonderboy with a
The soundtrack to the
voice you could just fall asleep
on, like a big funky blue duvet. new bond movie with
Shirley Manson delight-
7/10 H.B.G
ing the air of the epic
soundscape.
LANDSPEED LOUNGERS –
Wonderfully created but
Blackout Boy (23)
Interesting laid back lush pop very similar to other
bond songs, but still
sounds from the Landspeed
Loungers that are startlingly
9/10 K.M.
unique. ‘Green Man’ could be the
first worthwhile song about golf.
This is manufactured pop, and tion has she really been listening
7/10 R.W.
not very good pop either. This to Cuban and Brazillian music
song sounds a lot like Natalie and has chosen this time to let us
BIRTH - Sweet Idol (Hut)
Imbruglia, but with no depth. in on her secret or is she jumping
This has a very light feel. The gui-
Don’t bother. 3/10 M. W. on this summer’s latino bandwag-
tars pleasantly run along, and the
on. Even Geri’s latino number
vocals are, well pleasant. All in all
KIRSTY MACCOLL – Mambo De was better than this. 1/10 R.W.
very pleasant. Dull. 3/10 I.P.
LA Luna (V2)
A samba-swinging latin number
THUNDERBUGS – It’s About
from Kirsty, which begs the ques-
Time You Were Mine (Epic)

Hedonism?
SUEDE
Rivermead Leisure Complex,
Reading
30th October 1999
Readings Rivermead Leisure Complex
is an extremely difficult place to
find…This was the first review/inter-
view I was going to do for Barefacts,
and I was going to be late. After half
an hour of walking around aimlessly
and asking anybody who looked like
they might be going to a gig, we final-
ly found it.
Once in, I was told that Raissa,
Suede’s supporting act, was not yet
ready for the interview, so my sister,
her friend Yiyiki (she is Greek, you
see), and I sat down and enjoyed a
cup of coffee. At about twenty to ten Suede finally and trying to get the crowd to sing
After 20 minutes, she appeared…The
interview went fine and chatting to her
deigned to appear. The last time I saw
them was at the Civic Hall 2 years
with him a few times… The gig fin-
ished with ‘Saturday Night’, one of the
was no problem. ago, and this time they were just as best songs from ‘Coming Up’… a per-
At 7:00 p.m. the doors opened and good. Their set included mostly songs fect ending for a very enjoyable night.
everybody barraged in. Though by no taken from the Coming up album, Oliver Chamero
means crowded, I would say the venue which I reckon is
was a good ¾ full… a lot better than
First on stage was Raissa. The quality Head Music.
of her music was impeccable – the Highlights of the
band complemented her singing bril- night were the
liantly. Sadly she didn’t not know how classic ‘Animal
to move on stage – it looked as if Nitrate’ and ‘The
someone was telling her when to jump Beautiful Ones’.
around - and she barely interacted Brett Anderson
with crowd. Her set lasted about 40 was his usual
minutes, and after her Yiyiki and me self, interacting
went to the bar. We missed the next constantly with
band’s act entirely as it took us more the crowd,
than half an hour to get some swirling the
drinks…sorry about that folks!! From microphone
what I heard from the bar I can assure around as if it
you they weren’t up to much though! were a lasso

humour being displayed during

Apathy is Golden
Hershey And The 12 Bars
USSU Main Stage
7th November 1999
It’s cold outside, it’s getting dark earli-
er each day and you’ve got a million
pieces of coursework to do by the end
of the week so our union, in another
stroke of petrifying idiocy gets a blues
band to play so everyone can start the
week on a truly miserable note. Surely
it is only a matter of time before our
beloved Ents Manager releases his
cookbook “Recipes For Disaster”
which could challenge Delia Smith’s
“How To Boil Water In Ten Steps” !
As usual the Sunday Night Live band
was greeted by a dancefloor packed
to the rafters with students eager to
find out about new and exciting (okay
so that is a whopper of a lie…the
union was even more empty than
usual for a Sunday!). Despite the
curse of Surrey apathy striking again,
Hershey And The 12 Bars gave one
of the most amusing performances
likely to be seen at USSU outside of
the Comedy Network. With a left field
approach to topics such as AIDS,
alcoholism and the phenomena of the
“new man”, Hershey brought comedy
to the blues. This was no where more
evident than the song “New Man”
which managed to be strangely remi-
niscent of “Tony’s Dilemma” by hard-
core outfit Extra Hot Sauce whilst
being the tale of a caring, sharing
husband (oops, sorry, that should be
‘life partner’) who appears to be the
perfect man until he gets more than a
bit miffed about his mother-in-law
coming to dinner!
The comic nature of Hershey’s set
was not however restricted to the lyri-
cal content of their songs, it was also
evident in the between song banter
from the vocalist which included sug-
gesting that they were going to slow
things down after three songs (either
he was under the delusion that
rhythm and blues is the new speed
metal or it was a moment of pure
post-modernist irony) and vast array
of faces that were pulled by the lead
guitarist every time he launched into
another solo (or was it just one solo
he was playing for the entire set ?).
However, despite these humorous
aspects of Hershey’s on-stage perfor-
mance they couldn’t match the hilarity
of the dancing of one member of the
audience which proved two things:
(i) the spirit of Bez is alive and well
and living in Guildford
(ii) line dancing doesn’t have the
same visual impact when there is only
one person involved
One unfortunate consequence of this
Hershey’s set is that it detracted from
the music which became a secondary
feature on the night. However, despite
all of the obstacles (and against all
odds) the band gave a fine perfor-
mance of Premier League R n’ B
which was punctuated with a sprin-
kling of standard cover versions (i.e.
Albert Collins, Prince, Janis Joplin
and Jimi Hendrix) which allowed the
band members to demonstrate their
musical proficiency. Indeed, Hershey
even managed to fit in an encore of
“Voodoo Chile” in response to calls
from all 20 members of their attentive
audience, an event which, at the
beginning of the night appeared to be
as likely to happen as for Trayscrape
to incorporate bell ringing into their
songs!
However, despite this unmitigated
success against all the odds, it must
be said that the brand of R n’ B played
by Hershey And The 12 Bars is evi-
dently more suited to a small, smoke
filled jazz club. Furthermore, this gig
is likely to be forgotten early than it
deserves once the behemoth known
as Trayscrape perforates eardrums in
the Helyn Rose Bar tonight (provided
your reading this on the Thursday of
publication otherwise you’ve missed it
bozo!)
Andy Deegan
Mid West Somewhere
Texas
Live at Wembley Arena
2nd November 1999
Texas were ably supported by Bernard Butler, who man-
aged to get the crowd in just the right mood for Texas’s
arrival on stage with a mix of songs from both his albums.
The set was a mixture of songs from ‘White on Blonde’
and ‘The Hush’ with a couple of other covers thrown in. A
rousing rendition of ‘Black-Eyed Boy’ brought everybody to
their feet for a good old-fashioned boogie. Texas also
reminded us of their country beginnings with a version of ‘I
Don’t Wanna Lover’. The stage was great, backed by a
massive screen showing a mixture of video clips and what
was happening on stage. The band itself includes a couple
of backing singers (who dance like teenage girls in their
bedroom) and a DJ, who got together with the drummer to
show that it is not only guitar players who can strut their
stuff on stage. Speaking of guitar players, Tony is very
nice, and he can sing too. Charlene Spiteri has a fantastic
voice, and between that and the atmosphere, I would even
go so far as to say that Texas are even better live than
recorded. There is obviously a great rapport between band
members, which transmitted itself to the audience. I would
defy anyone not to have enjoyed that performance.
Jenni Hazzelby
Next Week:
Death In Vegas Live, Shack
Interview, The Chilis live (for sure) &
the usual CD Reviews.
12 Music & Arts 11th November 1999

tastic show it was, full of

Raissa: A Very Small Interview Is it a Tragedy? colour and imagination and

BF- What sort of music did you
listen to when you were young?
R- Well, I didn’t start listening to
pop music, I was into buskin so I
used to write my own things and
in school I wasn’t into music at all.
I had funny hair and I wasn’t in
any gang. I was always wander-
ing around on my own I got into
Prince when I was 16..
BF – Who would you say are your
main musical influences?
R - Prince influenced me a lot
and David Bowie, and Kate Bush
BF – What sort of music do you
listen to now?
R – I listen to really varied stuff…
a lot of old stuff. I like Dusty
Springfield, Billy Holiday, and a lot
of stuff that’s coming out now. I
listen to a lot of Indian music, stuff
on the Outcast label
BF – Indian music?
R – A bloke called Nittin Suni.. he
has just released an album. It’s a
fusion thing between Asian and
western music… Its got a bit of
dub, a bit of folk.. bit of everything
really!
BF – What is your favourite song?
R – A song by Joni Mitchell called
‘Help Me’.. it goes ‘Help me, I
Think I have fallen in love to
fast…’
And the interview had to end here
because she had to leave!
Oliver Chamero
STEPS
WEMBLEY ARENA
5TH NOVEMBER 1999
Once upon a time on Planet
Pop there lived a band called
Steps. Now Steps were a
happy bunch and not very up
on the post structuralist irony
of their music, but they had
some lovely co-ordinating
costumes and dance routines
ago-go. One day Steps
decided to tell all the people
about what it was like to live
on Planet Pop, so they went
on the biggest arena tour that
ever there was.And so it was
that on one dark night they
came to Wembley arena,
which was packed with peo -
ple, not all of whom were
eight years old. And they put
on a carnival and a parade
and sang Love’s Got a Hold
Of My Heart and they flung off
their carnival costumes and
suddenly they were all in
matching yellow and they
danced and sang Last Thing
On My Mind. Then they went
off to the Orient with plenty of
dragons and sang After the
Love Has Gone. And so it
went on, from the Moon in a
rocket ship to a Eden-eqse
Garden, to the depths of Hell
(don’t say it), and they sang
and danced their little hearts
out, to all their hits and songs
of their straight-in-at-number-
one new album. And the
thousands of people who had
come to find out what it as
like to be on Planet Pop sang
and danced their hearts out
too and thought what a fan-
energy.
After a while Steps decided
that they were getting a bit
tired, so they
sang Tragedy and ten thou-
sand people Tragedy-ied
back at them. And all of those
people went out into the night
and all slept soundly that
night, knowing that all was
well on Planet Pop, and that
the undisputed Kings and
Queens reigned supreme.
Claire Haggett
(with special thanks to
Lyndsey to helping me to
learn the dance moves
beforehand!)

Everest written from the experi- into fitness

bare fiction
Border Crossing
by Rosie Thomas
Rosie Thomas is an author of
women’s fiction and has two
children. Finding it hard to gain
inspiration for her novels from
her life’s experiences she made
a short trip to Everest base
camp. It was here that she met
Phil Bowen, who later would
form the other half of their rally-
ing team.
On 6th September 1997, Rosie
and Phil embarked on the chal-
lenge of a lifetime, the Peking
to Paris rally. They, and their
vintage Volvo Amazon, joined
nearly two hundred classic or
vintage cars and their crews for
a 45-day journey. It marked the
90th anniversary of the first
ever international rally, retracing
the course.
Border crossing is Rosie’s
account of the trip. It tells of a
gruelling schedule in tremen-
dous heat and treacherous con-
ditions, but also of relationships
forged and the emotions experi-
enced. The tone is honest and
expressive as Rosie recounts
the highs and lows of an incred-
ibly dangerous challenge
enveloping technical difficulties,
serious health problems, ques-
tioning of morals and the buzz
of ‘rally fever’.
Rosie Thomas Interview
Barearts:. Was it easy to make
the transition from fiction to non-
fiction?
R. It was much easier to write
non-fiction. With fiction you start
with a blank page every day. The
ideas are floating in the air and it
takes an enormous amount of
energy to group them together
and produce a story. With non-
fiction the story is there and it’s
just a matter of finding a way
I enjoyed reading about the
development of Rosie and
Phil’s roles in the rally and in
their very forced friendship.
They were in the Amazon for
hours on end with only each
other for company.
Rosie and Phil came 20th in the
rally. An incredible achievement
especially considering their lack
of experience and that at one
point Rosie had doubts as to
whether she’d make it to Paris.
I know that it is something that
she feels immensely proud of. I
had the opportunity to speak to
Rosie and ask her some ques-
tions. You can read the inter-
view in this week’s Barearts
section.
Liz Sweetland
to write it.
Barearts:.Did you see anything
on the trip that you will include in
a novel?
R. I didn’t find any stories but you
would see cameos at the side of
the road. For example, a mother
is bending to a child and an
elderly man looking away. I would
invent a story around it. I’ve also
just finished a novel set on
ence of my trip to base camp.
Barearts: Do you think writing
about the rally will gain you a dif-
ferent kind of readership?
R. Impossible to tell. I don’t know
what my readership is. I always
imagine that I’m writing for
younger people and am always
surprised at the number of grey
heads at these book signings.
Although I think that may say
more about book signings than
my writing. I did think there might
be some young men interested in
the rally driving aspect.
Barearts:Did you keep a journal?
R. I kept a whole media battery. I
had a commission for a book so I
kept a long diary entry. I took
video footage for the BBC as did
Phil, and did recordings for a
radio series.
Barearts: Is it good to have that
sort of record?
R. Well actually when I first came
back I couldn’t bear to look at it.
Some of the trip was so painful.
Now its quite amazing to look
through and sometimes I can’t
believe it’s me.
Barearts: How did you cope with
being thrust together with a
stranger for all that time?
R. We argued but fundamentally
we got on incredibly well and are
best friends. I overheard Phil
saying that I was the one person
he would turn to or phone in the
middle of the night if he had a
real problem. That’s the kind of
relationship that we forced.
Barearts: Are there any
countries that you passed
through that you would like
to go back to and see in
more detail?
R. Pakistan. It’s politically
extremely interesting. I’ve
just come back from Tibet
but have no desire to
return to China. Lots of
people love India but I
hated it. We couldn’t do
anything without people
swarming around us. It
made taking a pee very
difficult! The lack of privacy
was a real problem for me.
Barearts: You got really
before your
trip…
R. Yes, I did
boxing training,
circuit training,
running. I was
really fit before
the trip.
Barearts: Is it
something you
kept up?
R. Yes, I got a
real taste for it
before I left.
Barearts: And
what about your
interest in vin-
tage cars?
R. I couldn’t care
less if I never
saw one again.
There were
some beautiful cars but I really book?
know nothing about them. R. No. Some critics have said
that Border Crossing is just about
Barearts: What sorts of books Rosie and Phil and that they
do like to read? don’t learn anything. I wrote
R. I don’t read work by my direct about what I experienced.
competitors.
Barearts:. Would you write
Barearts: Who do you see as another travel book?
your competitors? R. Yes but it would have to be
R. Writers like Maeve Binchy, the right trip. I’d love to climb
although I’m in a strange group. Everest but that costs a lot of
My novels are neither commer- money. I’d also like to climb one
cial nor literary. I like to read of the mountains in Antarctica.
modern literary fiction like Ann The heat really got to me on the
Tyler or Updike. In my view rally. I’m much better art cold.
Updike is the greatest living I’ve just returned from a six-week
writer. trip to climb the sixth highest
peak in the world.
Barearts: Did you research into
the countries before writing the Liz Sweetland & Cathy Forbes
 11th November 1999
bare fiction
Survivor,
Chuck Palahniuk
In a book which begins with chap-
ter 47 and ends on page one you
can’t help feeling the countdown
is on. As the page numbers get
lower, the suspense builds and
the life of Tender Branson, the
narrator, spins further out of con-
trol.
Tender is telling his life story to
the black box of a Bowing 747
that he has hijacked. Born into the
Creedish Death Cult and a
younger son by just three min-
utes, he was hired out as a
domestic servant in the Outside
World. From his work Tender’s
knowledge of stain-removal and
etiquette seems endless, but he is
obviously not a well-adjusted per-
son.
Ten years after the Creedish com-
munity commits suicide the
remaining few cult members kill
themselves too. As the last sur-
vivor, Tender is catapulted to fame
as a marketable media messiah in
Films 13
pace fast and the dia- if you want lots of action and a Marian Keyes has the wonderful
logue realistic. It may gripping storyline, but it is very ability to shape her characters so
not be un-putdownable, true to life and makes you think. that everybody will recognise
but it is funny. Just try Keren Eales themselves somewhere in her
not to cringe in some books. This heart-warming tale
places.. read it to find Last Chance Saloon will make you laugh and cry,
out where! Cathy Marian Keyes through its sheer truthfulness and
a crazy world.
Forbes perceptiveness. A wicked sense
Though descriptive in style, a lot
Another hilarious offering from the of humour which will probably be
is left to the imagination and no
The Tribes of Palos Verdes Irish queen of comedy fiction. Last more
two people will read this book and
Joy Nicholson Chance Saloon is every bit as
see it in the same way. It is worth
funny as her previous novels
reading if only to see the World
Medina Mason is a fourteen year Watermelon, Lucy Sullivan is
from a completely different per-
old girl growing up in the posh Getting Married and Rachel’s
spective. Cathy Forbes
American town of Palos Verdes. Holiday (if you haven’t read them
Her twin brother Jim is good look - yet, then you should!). Fintan,
Onwards and Upwards,
ing and popular, and everything to Tara and Katherine all came from
Arabella Weir
Medina, but she is always teased the same small town in Ireland to
by the town’s “Towel Girls” for live in London. Now in their early
Though probably better known for
being ugly and unpopular. What thirties, they are still firm friends
her roles in the fast show and TV
with that and the stress of her and continue to support each other
presenting this Arabella Weir’s
parents’ continual arguments, through good times and bad. Tara
second novel. Meet Vicky Tess
Medina finds life pretty hard. She has been on a continuous diet
and Bert (short for Albertine). You
takes up surfing to take her mind since forever and would rather be
are invited to share in the ups and
off the horrible situation at home, with a no-hoper than on her own.
downs in their lives, from the first
and begins to take it more and Katherine has very strong opinions
day of big school onwards.
more seriously as her life gets about men, having been hurt badly
Beginning with their doped up
worse. The ending is very sad, in the past, and refuses to believe
schooldays in the seventies and
and there is an interesting twist to that handsome Joe Roth could be
ending in the much more civilised
the tale, but the storyline is not any different. Fintan has been appreciated by the girls
nineties, this is a book about get-
exactly gripping. On the whole, lucky enough to find true love in than the lads. Jenni Hazzelby
ting old without really growing up.
the book is easy to read because the shape of Sandro, but even his
Although by the end careers, chil-
of the way it is written, and life isn’t roses. Things can only get
dren and even the great unthink-
Medina is a likeable and realistic worse however when dangerously
able, marriage, have occurred.
character who the reader can sexy and amoral actor Lorcan
The characters are strong, the
relate to. This isn’t a book to read Larkin comes into their lives.
Fight Club
Fight Club is the latest Brad Pitt movie. It is wounds open and their bodies scarred.
based on Chuck Palahniuk’s debut novel of Jack has second thoughts and begins to
the same name. (He also wrote ‘Survivor’, reject the revolution but finds it hard to
reviewed this week in Barefiction) The main become detached from what he has
theme is that man’s natural strength and already become involved with.
aggression, so vital in setting up the mod-
ern world, are no longer needed. This nat- Fight Club stars Brad Pitt, Edward Norton,
ural aggression is suppressed by a ‘testos - Brad Pitt, Helena Bonham Carter, Brad Pitt,
terone-intolerant society’. This film is about Meat Loaf Aday and Jared Leto (in case
men realising this need for aggression. you’re done looking at Brad Pitt!) It sounds
like a gory one with plenty of violence and
Jack (Edward Norton), bound by corporate it stars Brad Pitt.
boredom, is impressed by the charismatic
Tyler Durden (Brad Pitt), a waiter and self- Liz Sweetland
proclaimed ‘Guerrilla
terrorist of the ser-
vice industry’. Durden
(Pitt) starts up the
‘Fight Club which is a
late-night secret sport
where men take part
in brutal bare-knuck-
led boxing. These
cult-like groups grow
in popularity and
spread rapidly. Those
involved can be easi-
ly spotted their
UNION ENTS PLANNER

‘Open to everybody’ refers to members only or registered guests of the University of Surrey Students’ Union
11/11/99 15
16 11/11/99

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1 potato, cubed Sets & Blow Drys included in all
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1. Marinade chicken in a mixture of soy sauce, salt and curry powder.
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CD’s - Jake’s CD’s -Drapes
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Cost: About £2-3
Bits N’ Pieces
If you have any further question please e-mail ce81cc@surrey.ac.uk
11/11/99 17
LUNAR LISA & MYSTIC MOONDA Dear Russ
Dr Russ
SCORPIO TAURUS
October 24 - November 22 April 21 - May 21 I am thinking about doing a PhD. How should I go about it
Elbow Bollocks. and how do I know I would be suited to it anyway?
Unlucky Object: A bim bow... Unlucky Object: A missing lunchbox (“But they’d get
hungry wouldn’t they?”- “No, Lunar...” Moonda). Dear Keri
SAGITTARIUS
November 23 - December 21 GEMINI It is probably better if I answer the second part of your
Eyebrow May 22 - June 21 question first. I have lost count of the number of PhD stu-
Unlucky Object: Elvis Presley. Arse. dents I have seen over the years who have wanted to give
Unlucky Object: Wind. up. In many cases, they simply hadn’t realised just how dif-
CAPRICORN ferent a PhD would be from a first degree. Apart from one
December 22 - January 21 CANCER or two special doctorates, most PhDs involve no lectures,
Big Toe. June 21 - July 23 no revision and just one single 2-3 hour exam at the end.
Unlucky Object: Small foot. Inner thigh. You may find yourself working alone for long periods. You
Unlucky Object: Mr Sticky on his afternoon walk. may meet what appear to be insurmountable problems or
AQUARIUS you may simply fail to obtain the results or information
January 21 - February 19 LEO which you need. You are therefore more likely to succeed
Mouth July 24 - August 23 if you are determined, patient, have good time manage-
Unlucky Object: Carpet Lips ment skills and the ability to solve problems. It also goes
Unlucky Object: Lipstick (“But no-one would see it.” without saying that you should have an enquiring mind and
Moonda) a love for the subject you are studying. Do you think you fit
PISCES this bill? If you have serious doubts about these require-
February 20 - March 20 VIRGO ments a PhD might not be right for you.
For head. August 24 - September 23
Unlucky Object: Skin. Penis Moving on to the other part of your question, a good place
Unlucky Object: A lollipop (Know your enemy). to start looking is in either Postgrad or in Prospects
ARIES Postgraduate Directory, both of which can be seen in the
March 21 - April 20 LIBRA Careers Library. They will give you some idea of the kind
Breasts September 24 - October 23 of research going on in different parts of the country. If you
Unlucky Object: Big Nipples. Ear. would like more detailed information you could try Current
Unlucky Object: The couple next door. Research in Britain, a copy of which can be seen in the
Main Library. This contains brief descriptions of the work
which various academic staff in British universities are car-
You can tell Uncle Clarke – (No really, you can) rying out. The next step would be to send your CV with a
covering letter explaining what you would like to do and
Dear Uncle Clarke, but now I come to mention it there has been a strange why. You can make as many applications as you like.
I keep hearing this funny noise - kind of a neighing sound, smell coming from the toilets, and I wondered who was in
I think. Yesterday I found this big brown nose in my there all the time (hmmm). Finally, if you would like to stay at Surrey, all you need to
wardrobe. I’m too afraid to tell anyone (even Mr Sticky the do is mention your interest to the member of staff with
stick insect). I can’t sleep at night and I’m fed up of hiding I’m quite worried about this brown thing in your cupboard - whom you would like to work and they will tell you what
in the toilet. Please help! What is it and where should I tell are you sure it isn’t Mystic Moonda playing with her charts? might be available.
it to go? If not, then I suggest you try to communicate. Sit down
with the nose, have a cup of tea and a good chat. I sense Russ Clark
Yours desperately, you are having a problem communicating, find something Careers Service
Lunar Lisa. you have in common! As for Mr Sticky, well, we all won-
dered why you were having such a good fetish night and
Dear Lunar, now we know.
I am terribly sorry to hear about this problem you’ve been
having, but never mind as you’ve come to the right place. Yours helpingly,
I believe your problem lies in the stars, nope not Uranus, Clarke.
barefacts@surrey.ac.uk

Looks like Twyford H level 2 have forgotten how to party. It seems downstairs has
the edge noisewise!! The Chairman

Vicky - I still want YOUR blue T-Shirt (and what’s in it) and no-one else’s, but was
the Spaghetti Bolognese enough?? Kisses, Matt xxx

Watch out for Chancellor’s new menu, featuring “Deep fried ‘Sorry we need a griddle
to cook those, Sir’ with chips” with a side order of “Bugger All” and “Steamed ‘sorry
we haven’t defrosted it yet’ with cream” for dessert all for an outstanding price of
£1!!!

GET WELL SOON NIKKI ROGERS!!! - LOTS OF LOVE MATTHEW XXXXXX

Lukey babey, please remove your disgusting poster of naked women from the fridge
in the kitchen.

cheer up puss puss, fate will take its course and show you the way and i
will always love you, if you cant sort it out well just have to have each
otherxxxxxxxx

Charlie i know life can be shit but it wont always be bad, get back into
snogging those army men, youll be as right as rain ( and stop giving wrong
If you would like
numbers to the wrong people!!!)xxxxx
to submit a pic-
ture for caught on
I'm marrying my spider so hands off!!!
camera at any-
time during the

SURREY LGB SOCIAL GROUP

year, please feel
free to drop it into
the Barefacts post
box (outside the
Sabbatical meets informally on a Tuesday evening in
Offices) or email it
directly to the Grant Mitchell Meeting Room in
barefacts@sur- the Students Union at 7.30 pm.
rey.ac.uk
18 11/11/99

NOTICES
Your University needs you!
We need student volunteers to help
disabled students with a variety of
needs from shopping to academic
assistance.
We are committed to providing
equal opportunities for all our stu-
dents in a caring and enabling envi-
ronment.

If you are interested in helping out in any

way then please contact Emma Sale
(E.Sale@surrey.ac.uk) or Suzy Harvey

MENINGITIS C VACCINE

STILL AVAILABLE FOR FIRST YEAR

STUDENTS

Please attend the Health Centre

between 9.00am and 12.00 noon. No
appointment is necessary. Alternatively,
telephone 9051 OR 2072 for details of
other sessions available.

We are situated at the bottom of Stag

Hill near Yorkies Bridge.

To register with the Student Health

Centre, please come any weekday morn-
ing between 10.00am and 12.00 noon or
The barefacts editorial meeting is held on Monday’s at 7pm in the Grant Mitchell in the afternoon between 2.00pm and
Room. 4.00pm.
 11/11/99 19
It’s Grim up North.
Yorkshire, land of creamy beer, flat, caps, whippets and gritstone. The first real-
ly big weekend trip for the USMC saw us up north for a couple of days gritstone
The Week’s Sporting
Fixtures
jamming, well, that was the plan...

Saturday was spent climbing (and shivering) at the Cow and Calf rocksnear
Ilkley, cold is good for grit-better friction, but not so good for the hands. Most of
us managed a couple of routes, mostly in an effort to get into the sunand warm
up a bit. The last trip of the day for some of us was to Harrogate General hos-
pital, Tom took a leader fall which left him with what could have been a broken
ankle, for tunately it was only a bad sprain, but it left him hobbling about on
crutches for the remainder of the weekend.

The evening as ever, was spent in the pub trying to teach first years the tradi-
tional drinking games with varied success. Unfortunately this year the landlord
didn’t grant us the expected lock-in so we had to go and finish drinking in the
minibus which was considerably warmer than the tents. The next morning we
all stumbled back into the pub for a much need fry-up and eventually headed
for Bridestone boulders at about 12:30. After eventually finding the place
(through luck - the directions in the guidebook being generally shite) the gener-
al consensus was the it was too cold and wet to go climbing and lunch in the
pub was the bette option. By the time we left the pub it was starting to get dark
so again the general consensus was to head back to Guildford. So, as far as
climbing was concerned it wasn’t the most successful weekend, but we had a
laugh none the less (mostly at Tom once we knew it was nothing serious!) and
that’s just as important!

ATHLETICS CLUB
On wednesday the Athletics club was in action in the London College
League cross country, at Richmond Park (London somewhere). The
weather held out to make this an enjoyable race, and not too muddy!
The distances were 5 miles for the
blokes, and 2.5 miles for the
women.

Notable performances were:

Vicky Frew 2nd
Nick Holt 25th
Mike Merchant 37th
James Harrison 65th

The next race is at Wimbledon on

the 17th of November. However
Cross country is not all the Athletics
club does, as the name suggests,
and we would welcome new mem-
bers----Anyone interested in athlet-
ics of any sort is welcome!

Mike Merchant
Secretary of University of Surrey Athletics Club

WHO ATE ALL THE TRIES?

WHO ATE ALL THE
TRIES?
University of Surrey RFC 20
University of Brigton RFC
17
Another Wednesday,
another injury crisis. Surrey
were once again hit by the
loss of a number of crucial
players, but we managed to
cobble together the rugby
equivalent of a patchwork
quilt for the home match
against Brighton. Despite
the initial problems we were
able to drive Brighton off the
ball in the forwards, stealing
a number of their scrums
and retaining posession. It
only took about 5 minutes of
sterling forward play for one
of the founder members of
the Fat Boys' Club, Lazy
Boy, to trundle over the
Brighton line for his first try of
the season.Broddle was
unable to make the conver-
sion, but only a few minutes
later his penalty (boo Ascot,
we want French flair!) went
flying between the posts to
give us an 8-0 lead.
Once again, however, we
decided that winning the
game by a mile was far too
easy a way of doing things,
and figured that we'd let
Brighton make us look fool-
ish for a bit. Brighton's first
try was actually a well-
worked move, but the build-
up should never have hap-
pened. The conversion
went over, and the score
was 8-7.
Half time featured some
colourful language from
Ascot, and a reminder that
this was a match that we
should easily win. With this
in mind, we went straight
back out and conceded a try
under the posts which,
amazingly, Brighton failed to
convert. 12-8 to Brighton.
Some more sloppy defend-
ing saw Brighton crash over
once again, leaving us
twenty minutes and a score-
line of 17-8 to the opposi-
tion.
Finally, Surrey started
playing properly, with some
thunderous running
from the backs and proper
rucking from the forwards.
By this stage we had lost
Broddle and Ascot (mais
non!) to injury, so the Fat
Boys' revolution continued
as the Tapp Monster took
over as skipper. Lazy Boy
was able to roll off another
maul to score his second in
the corner, but Duffy was
unable to make the conver-
sion, which set the score at
17-13 with only 5 minutes
left. It was here that Lazy
earned himself a bit of a
shoeing for sacrificing a
scoring chance by trying to
score the winner himself
(greedy man), but we recov-
ered and Duffy was able to
touch down the winner, then
get the kick to put the final
score at 20-17 to Surrey.
The post-match celebra-
tion included yet another
boat race victory for the
Surrey beer-swiggers, but
Brighton took revenge by
kidnapping chairman
Athers, bundling him onto
the coach and driving him to
Eastbourne where he was
forced to drink far too much.
On a personal note, I would
like to thank Munday, Big
Mac, Tapp, Ross and Lazy
for stiching me up like a kip-
per. I had to get from
Eastbourne to Guildford
covered in blue camo paint
and
smelling of beer.
Recriminations will be forth-
coming.
Athers.
VOLUNTEERS REQUIRED
On Sunday November 21st the
University is holding a “Taster Day” at
Campusport. The event is open to all
members of the local community in
order for them to try out sports in the
run up to the “Guildford Borough
Millennium Games”. So that the event
can run smoothly we need volunteers
to help on the day. You don’t have to
be really sporty and there will be a
training evening at Campusport on
Wednesday November 17th.
For more information please contact:
Emma Sale (VP Education and
Welfare)- x9228/E.Sale@surrey.ac.uk
Sally Edie (Campusport)-
x9891/s.edie@surrey.ac.uk
Barry Hitchcock (Campusport)-
x9200/B.Hitchcock@surrey.ac.uk
Rugby Birds aren't completely talentless - honest!
The Women's rugby club may at a higher level. A big hand Bluebird - watch out, your role
not have had many matches yet must go out to Captain Stalker as hooker will live up to its rep-
this season (could this be due to and Probignon (Bernie) for utation; Xena Warrior Lou -
the fact that we're "rather large" being chosen to represent the they're not all scared of you,
psycho nutters and all the other regional side. Their achieve- honest; Cecil - pisshead; and
uni's are scared of us?) but ment is a big boost for the Jenny - rude dirty stop-out, who
we've been far from inactive whole team (who originally even puts Stalks to shame, well
(except the morning after the thought they had no talent what- done girlies and carry on the
drinking boot has been out). soever). pitch saying "maim, kill, disfig-
ure" oh and keep the 1st team
A few of our players have pro- On an even lighter note another motto going too "spread your
gressed away from the vital role "opportunity" has arisen for four legs, feet firm and in!"
of 'propping' up the Varsity Bar of our squad to play for
and have been selected to play Cranleigh WRFC's first team: Raaaaaaah,Psycho and Cecil.

BUSA Dinghy Nationals 99.
The Plymouth dinghy
nationals, highlight of the
student sailor’s social/sail-
ing calendar began in the
usual way with unloading
boats in the pouring rain
and howling wind before
retiring to the Backpacker’s
hostel for a party with
Nottingham Trent and
Brunel Universities.
Our hangovers were how-
ever quickly shaken off the
next morning by the sight of
sea gulls being blown back-
wards in the gale as we
SURREY PRIDE
rigged our boats, and the
weather looked like getting
worse.
Several Surrey boats man-
aged to have a thoroughly
good day’s sailing without
ever even finding the start
line, largely due to the fact
that the race instructions
were not sent to us until the
day before. Oli Fields and I
however happily sailed one
and a half races before the
conditions started to seri-
ously deteriorate. After our
6th capsize Oli asked “can’t
we just get a Taxi?” and
finding that there were
none available we decided
to retire, only to find that we
had been disqualified any-
way because we had sailed
the wrong course.
Saturday night was even
wilder than Friday resulting
in one case of concussion,
several people sleeping in
their clothes, and copious
amounts of vomit. The next
day those among us who
were feeling rather delicate
were happy to be met with
a flat calm sea…the novelty
did wear off though when
two hours later we were
still waiting for the wind.
To pass the time we sang
songs, capsized boats,
swam, stole shoes and
ate Mars bars handed out
by Alex who had blagged
a place on the committee
boat. At midday the wind
kicked in and all eighty-
five Laser IIs crossed the
line going like the clap-
pers for a thoroughly
excellent day's racing.
There was nothing hugely
impressive about our

FROM RUSSIA WITH LOVE results but as a largely

The University of Surrey
has always been
renowned the quality of
its students and it would
appear that this trend has
continued well into
1999/2000 in the form of
dancer/teacher/actress
and choreographer -
Maria Terpugova.
Many of you will have seen
the adverts for her classes
at Campusport dotted
across campus, but after a
brief interview with Maria it
became quickly apparent
that teaching is only one of
the qualities that she has
brought with her to UniS.
Born in St Petersburg,
Russia, Maria (now 28 and
a dance student) has an
amazing history in the world
of dance across the
European continent. After
being educated at the Kirov
Vaganova Ballet Academy
(St Petersburg) and gradu-
ating with a state diploma as
a dancer for ballet and musi-
cal, she has an impressive
collection of performances
and references that span
over a decade on stage and
screen. Yet one of the most
interesting challenges for
her appears to now be
achieving degree status
from a British University. So
what brought Maria
Terpugova to The University
of Surrey?
Well, it would appear that
coming to study in England
was a childhood dream and
even after living for 8 years
in Germany - the excitement
she shows towards studying
at one of the only
Universities in the EU that
has an MA Dance Studies
course is unbounded.
‘I was drawn to Surrey by its
reputation and had seen
adverts for it in ‘Dance
International’ Magazine. ‘It
had also been an ambition
of mine to come and study
in England’. Maria has taken
many solo contracts with dif-
ferent theatres in Germany
(Berlin, Cologne, Cottbus
and Rostock) as well as
many solo concerts of her
own choreography in the
Philharmony Berlin. She has
taken roles in classic musi-
cals such as Evita, Hair,
West Side Story and
Caberet and also participat-
ed as a dancer and choreo-
grapher in international
dance and arts festivals in
USA, Berlin, Valencia and
Madrid.
At Surrey, it would appear
that Maria aims to take her
wealth of experience as a
classically trained dancer
and combine it with a differ-
ent kind of self discipline -
learning how to apply her
knowledge of dance with the
critical and analytical ele-
ments of a research degree.
‘British dance culture shows
a lot of connections to the
dance traditions of the for-
mer USSR and by studying
here I will be improving my
knowledge of English cul-
ture and language through
inexperienced team we
did get some valuable
practice and had a
damned good time. WE
are all now looking for-
ward to next weekend’s
“Wet-dream” – watch out
Reading here we come!
WET WEEKEND IN NEWQUAY
FOR SURF CLUB
Starting as it means to go Half day leasson by BSA
on, the surf club will soon be qualified coaches (you will The more people we can get
making a trip toNewquay for be better than me by the end down to Newquay, the more
some first class surf. The of the day) fun it will be and the cheap-
trip will have priority forbe- -Clubbing or just chilling at er it will become. All inter-
ginners or near beginners, I Matt's Surf Lodge seted should let me know as
hope to give you all a quali- -Surfing, surfing and a bit soon as possible so we can
ty firstexperience of surfing. more surfing on Sunday get a rough idea of num-
Going to Newquay will pro- -Late return to Guildford. bers. I can be reached on
vide both the surf for this Cost for travel, accomoda- 4932, messages can be left
and a good selection of tion (including breakfast), in the surf club pigeon hole
clubs for our first night. surfing lessons and equip- or e-mailed to ce91dc@sur-
Expected itinary is ment hire should be around rey.ac.uk
--Early start Sat morning - the £35 mark. David
University life as well as
dance.’
As part of this process,
Maria is currently running
dance workshops for
Campusdance and also
looking to extend her teach-
ing whilst at Surrey .
‘Eventually I want to teach
as well as further my career
in film choreography -
Surrey is the next step in
achieving this’
Maria is looking to teach to
help subsidise her studies
and is open to offers and
suggestions for teaching. As
previously mentioned she is
running classes for
Campusdance on Monday’s
at 8pm - specifically looking
at international dances. For
more information on Maria’s
dance tuition please email:
raprince@dircon.co.uk or
contact Campusdance @
Campusport.
AB