Your Call Is Important to Us

By Elton Camp

When calling a company of much size,

Automated answering isn’t a surprise.
“Thank you for calling our business so fine,
But we do not intend to come on the line.”

But your call is important to us.

Listen carefully to what you must do:

For English press one, for Spanish two.
And now is the time for us to mention
Punch right now your party’s extension.

Your call is important to us.

If that number you don’t know,

Then here is the way you do go.
To put you on the right trajectory
Key the name into our directory.

Your call is important to us.

Since a response you didn’t make

Here’s another route you can take.
We may learn just what you mean
From these options, a list of fifteen.

Your call is important to us.

Enter the number that fits best

And simply ignore all the rest.
When it gets to the end
Hold to hear it all again.

Your call is important to us.

You have picked option five

Don’t expect a person alive.
All representatives are busy right now,
But for you to hold we happily allow.

Your call is important to us.

Here’s some music to entertain
While on the line you do remain.
Our valued customers are not deceived
Calls are answered in the order received.

Your call is important to us.

Thank you for continuing to hold

Or so says a voice for times untold.
A rep will be with you right away.
And we are so sorry for any delay.

Your call is important to us.

We figure that your time is ours to waste,

So why should we even try to make haste.
This handles calls at lower cost
Even if customer goodwill is lost.

Your call is important to us.

We are so sorry to have to say

Business hours are over today.
Our policy now does direct
Your line must disconnect.

But your call is important to us.

“If it’s important, hire some more

customer representatives!”