The true story

of the man and

the ostrich
 The man goes into the bar and sits down,
followed by an ostrich.
The barman comes over.
L’homme et l’autruche
The man says:  I’ll have a beer.

The barman looks at the ostrich who says:

Same for me, please.
The barman pours the two beers and puts them
on the bar.
That’ll be £5.20, please.

L’homme et l’autruche
The man puts his hand in his pocket and pulls
out the exact amount and gives it to the
barman.

The next day, the man and the ostrich

come back and exactly the same
happens.
 Every evening the same routine happens.

- The usual? asks the barman.

L’homme et l’autruche
- No, thanks. I’ll have a double scotch this time.

- And the same for me, adds the ostrich.

- That’s £5.80 then.

Again, the man puts his hand in his pocket and

pulls out the exact amount of money.
 At this point the barman just has to know why.

-Excuse me for asking, but how do you manage

L’homme et l’autruche
to pull out the exact amount of money every
time?

- Well, it might sound funny but I was

clearing my attic and I found an old lamp. I
rubbed it (as one would) and a genie popped out
and gave me any two wishes.
 - My first was to be able to pay for whatever I
wanted to buy simply by putting my hand in my pocket
and I would always have the correct amount.

L’homme et l’autruche
-Very clever, smiled the barman. Most people would have
asked for a million pounds, or something like that, but you
chose a way of being rich for ever.
 - Absolutely: whether its for a newspaper or
a Citroen Berlingo the exact amount is always
in my pocket.
L’homme et l’autruche
- So what’s the story about the ostrich,
then?

- That’s where I ballsed up as, for my second wish,

I asked for a chick with long legs …