His Favourite Cousin

Horace was very proud of his cousin, Mike Aspen, Hollywoods brightest young star. Whenever his cousin appeared on the screen, Horace said, Isnt he wonderful? Hes my cousin, you know. What was worse, Horace was always cutting pictures of his cousin out of movie magazines and putting them on the kitchen wall. His wife used to say, We used to have a nice clean wall. Now all I can see is Mike, Mike, and Mike! Then she walked angrily out of the kitchen and slam the door behind her. When Mikes face used to appear on posters or billboards, Horace proudly said about his cousins successful career. He used to go to Midville High School, you know. We always played in the schoolyard together, and we were always getting into trouble together. I remember how he was always stealing apples from the corner grocery store. He used to be like a brother to me. We were always missing classes together. What a great guy, a truly great guy. He was my favorite cousin. One day, though, everyone woke up to find the daily newspapers covered with the headlines, MIKE ASPEN INVOLVED IN GANGLAND KILLING. Reporters went to Horaces house to interview him. Did you and Mike Aspen really use to be like brothers? Is it true you were both getting in trouble all the time? What kind of trouble? Did you really play in the school yard together? Mike Aspen . . . Mike Aspen . . . . , he said in a puzzled voice. Oh, yes! The actor. Horace shook his head, No relation to me. Never met the guy. COMPREHENSION Answer the following questions according to your understanding of the text: 1. Who was Mike Aspen? 2. Why was Horace proud of him? 3. What was Horace always doing? 4. Why was Horaces wife angry? 5. What school did Horace and his cousin go to? 6. What were they always doing together? 7. What happened one day? 8. What did Horace tell the reporters? 9. Did he tell the truth? 10. What do you think about Horaces attitude?

Confidence Man
Ive never been so humiliated in my life! shouted Dorothy angrily. Why didnt you stand up to that jerk? Tell me, she continued, have you ever lost your temper or been in a fight? Ill bet youve never hit anybody in your whole life! How would you like to be the first? Clyde said to himself, knowing that Dorothy couldnt hear him. She was walking rapidly away in the direction of the parking lot. The next day at work, Clyde couldnt help thinking about the incident. They had been relaxing on the beach when Dorothy decided she was hungry. At the refreshment stand, a big muscular man had pushed in front of them and stepped on Dorothys foot. Clyde had made a weak protest, but the man had only laughed in his face. His thoughts were suddenly interrupted when the manager shouted, Clyde! Have you waited on that customer yet? Ive got a business to run here, so wake up, will you? And what about the inventory list? Have you taken it to Mr. Watson yet? Not even waiting for a reply, the manager hurried back to his office. Im tired of this! Clyde whispered, knowing his boss couldnt hear him. That evening Clyde was reading the newspaper when he saw an advertisement: DO YOU LACK SELF-CONFIDENCE? HAVE YOU EVER FELT UNPOPULAR AND LEFT OUT OF A GROUP? IF YOU HAVENT ENROLLED YET ENROLL NOW IN DOCTOR IVOS CONFIDENCE COURSE. AFTER A FEW EASY LESSONS YOULL BE A DIFFERENT PERSON. Thats just what I need, Clyde thought. Ill enroll tomorrow. After finishing the course, Clyde really did feel like a new person. When Dorothy finally called him, he decided to show off his new personality. Clyde! I havent heard from you in ages! Why dont we go and see the new movie at the Roxy? Ive already seen it, Clyde said confidently. I took Linda to see it last night, as a matter of fact. Dorothy was shocked. Youve already seen it, have you? she said furiously. Yes, I have, said Clyde calmly. If I have time I might give you a call next week, but I havent made up my mind yet, he said, hanging up the phone. The next day at work his boss started shouting at him as usual, but this time Clyde answered, Listen, Mr. Bumstern, Ive already written that report and given it to Mr. Watson. In fact, its only eleven oclock, and Ive already sold two hundred dollars worth of merchandise, so why dont you shout at somebody else for a change?

Two months later, Clyde was sitting in the company lunchroom with his friends, telling jokes and flirting with all the girls. Mr. Bumstern told us that youve already broken last years sales record, said Frank, a fellow worker, and this fiscal year hasnt even ended yet! Have you ever thought of selling your secret of success to the rest of us? asked Miriam, the cashier. Clyde smiled and told his story is feelings of rejection, and the confidence he gained with Doctor Ivo. Ivo, Ivo, repeated Miriam; Ive never heard of him. I have, said Frank. Havent you seen the article about him in the newspaper yet, Clyde? He pulled out The Daily Mail and pointed to the article: CON MAN WALLACE IVO CONVINCTED OF FRAUD. Clyde read the article with a sick feeling in his stomach. Forget that dumb article and tell us a joke, said Miriam. Everyone smiled and waited eagerly for Clyde to tell them one of his funny stories. I cant . . . uh . . . I mean . . . Ive never . . . I cant remember . . . I mean Ive never been able to tell good jokes. He got up and left the table. Not long afterwards, Clyde lost his job. He hadnt made a single sale in three months. Youre a funny guy, said Mr. Bumstern when he fired him. Ive never met anyone like you. What you need is a confidence course. Have you ever thought of taking one? No, sir, I never have. Clyde smiled sadly, picked up his briefcase, and walked out into the rain. COMPREHENSION Answer the following questions according to you understanding of the text: 1. Why was Dorothy angry? 2. Where were they when she got hungry? 3. What happened at the refreshment stand? 4. What did the big man do? 5. How did Clyde protest? 6. What did he read in the newspaper? 7. How did he feel after finishing the confidence course? 8. What did he read in The Daily Mail? 9. How did he feel after reading the article? 10. What happened afterwards?