Pawn

War By Ricky Diaz

Characters:
Dan (30s): A tall, well-built man whos trying to sell his 1862 Burnside Carbine rifle, a Civil War era gun, to the Pawn Shop Owner. Hes very intelligent, but also desperate for cash. Pawn Shop Owner (60s): A older, run-down looking man. Hes the owner of the pawn shop that Dan is trying to sell his Carbine to. Hes a deceitful, conniving, sleazy, smart old man. He had an expert come in and appraise the gun for $8,000, knowing its really worth at least $10,000 because the Pawn Shop Owner discovered it was Ambrose Burnsides personal carbine.

1. SCENE 1: PAWN OFF Lights stay down for a few beats. DAN Look, do you want it or not?! PAWN SHOP OWNER I gave you my price and thats my final offer. Lights fade up from black on DAN and the PAWN SHOP OWNER haggling over a Civil War era rifle. DAN Youre Civil War weapons guy just came in here and said my 1862 Burnside Carbine is worth $8,000. PAWN SHOP OWNER Yeah, and? DAN You offered me 800! PAWN SHOP OWNER Thats a fair offer. DAN Theres no way Im going to let you make a 90% profit off of me! PAWN SHOP OWNER My offer stands. DAN Whats your deal? This thing is in immaculate condition, it was actually used in the Civil War, and it still works for crying out loud! What else do you want from it? Wings?! PAWN SHOP OWNER Things like this are a hard sell. DAN Hey, I watch the History Channel so dont try and pull that "Pawn Stars" crap on me. I know that there are a ton of Civil War era collectors and gun collectors out there that would pay loads of cash to have this in their collection.

2. PAWN SHOP OWNER Well... yeah... Ill tell you what, Ill go up to $1,800. Thats really as high as I can go. DAN Come on, man! Youre low-balling me here! PAWN SHOP OWNER My guy said that similar carbines have gone for $8,000 at auctions. If I by this carbine off you and take it to auction, it may not sell for that much. Not to mention I have to pay the 30% auctioneer commission fee. I have to make a profit on the spread here, or whats the point in buying it from you? DAN How about $4,000? PAWN SHOP OWNER I can go to $2,000 and not a penny more. DAN You cannot be serious! PAWN SHOP OWNER Take it or leave it. DAN grabs the gun off of the table. DAN Ill leave it! DAN begins to exit. PAWN SHOP OWNER Hold on! Hold on! 25-hundred is pushing it, but thats as much as afford. Any more than that and I run the risk of losing money. DAN stops and waits for a beat. He considers the offer. He walks back over to the table and sets the gun back down. Lets just call this what it is, sir. If you didnt need this money right now, you wouldnt be in a pawn shop. [Beat.] If you had the time to wait, you could sell it for full price on eBay, but you dont and thats why youre here. So, Im doing you a favor by offering you 25-hundred. You can either take it and say thank you, or get the Hell out of my shop!

3. DAN sighs. Hes silent for a beat.

DAN Youre right. I need the money. [Beat.] 25-hundred it is. DAN extends his hand to finalize the deal. The PAWN SHOP OWNER shakes DANs hand. PAWN SHOP OWNER Okay, pleasure doing business with you. Why dont you head over to the cash register and my associate will write this up. DAN Alright. DAN exits. After a beat, the PAWN SHOP OWNER suspiciously looks after him to ensure DAN wont walk back over to him. The PAWN SHOP OFFER pulls out his cell phone and dials. After a beat, the person he was calling answers. PAWN SHOP OWNER Hey, Dino! [Beat.] Yeah, its Pauley. [Beat.] Hey, thanks for coming in today and giving me a price on that 62 Burnside Carbine. [Beat.] Yeah, we took him to cleaners, man. I bought it off of him for two and a half. The PAWN SHOP OWNER picks up the gun with both hands and holds his phone between his ear and shoulder. He looks at it from all angles. Yeah, this thing is worth 10,000 easy! Im looking to make a killing on this thing! [Beat.] Yeah, not mentioning that engraving of Ambrose Burnsides initials on the side really brought the price. I love it when suckers come into the shop! [Beat.] Thanks again, Dino. Ill call you next time I need to rob someone! The PAWN SHOP OWNER laughs. Alright, Ill see you later. Bye. The PAWN SHOP OWNER hangs up his cell phone and puts it back in his pocket. He stands admiring the gun for a few beats. Ambrose Burnsides carbine. You are going to make me rich! I wonder how this thing works. [Beat.] Hey Joey, youre good with guns right? The PAWN SHOP OWNER begins to exit. Just before hes off stage, the gun goes off and the PAWN SHOP OWNER falls to the ground. Lights fade to black.

 END OF PLAY 4.