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Accountability

"Accountability breeds response-ability."

Stephen R. Covey
"Accountability breeds response-ability."
Stephen R. Covey Jan. 15 — Jan. 21, 2009
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1 Thessalonians 5:11 (NRSV) Therefore encourage one another and 15
build
up each other, as indeed you are doing.
Accountability Proverbs 17:17 (NCV) A friend loves you all the time, and a brother
helps in time of trouble.
A Biblical Example: Proverbs 29:11 NIV
The Letters of Paul A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under
control.
Define Accountability (see Dictionary at the back): Proverbs 22: 24.
Do not associate with a man given to anger ; Or go with a hot-tempered
man, 25. Or you will learn his ways And find a snare for yourself.
Now explain it in your own words: Acts 7:51 "You men who are stiff-necked and uncircumcised in heart and
ears are always resisting the Holy Spirit ; you are doing just as your fa-
thers did. 52. "Which one of the prophets did your fathers not perse-
cute ? They killed those who had previously announced the coming of
The idea of accountability is not new. It was God’s idea to begin with the Righteous One, whose betrayers and murderers you have now be-
(the best ones always are). come ; 53. you who received the law as ordained by angels, and yet did
not keep it."
Read Galatians 6:1-10 (See page 14)
Proverbs 25:11. A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of
silver. 12. Like an earring of gold or an ornament of fine gold is a wise
According to this passage what should we man's rebuke to a listening ear.
do?:

Dictionary
Accountability:answerable or accountable, as for something within one's
power, control, or management. Able to be trusted or depended upon;
reliable. Based on or characterized by good judgment or sound thinking

Capisce (pronounced cah-PEESH) is an Italian word that is used in

American slang to say "got it" or "understand."

January
January 1,15,
2009 2009 Dictionary
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Scripture References What should we not do?:

James 5:16. Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each
other

Romans 1:11 I long to see you so that I may impart to you some spiritual
gift to make you strong--12. that is, that you and I may be mutually en-
couraged by each other's faith.

Galatians 6:1. Brothers, if someone is caught in a sin, you who are spiri-
tual should restore him gently. But watch yourself, or you also may be
tempted. 2. Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill God created us to keep track of each other. How do you think God
the law of Christ. 3. If anyone thinks he is something when he is noth- would answer Cain’s famous question (Read Genesis 4:2-8)?
ing, he deceives himself. 4. Each one should test his own actions. Then
he can take pride in himself, without comparing himself to somebody
else, 5. for each one should carry his own load. 6. Anyone who receives
instruction in the word must share all good things with his instructor. 7.
Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows.
8. The one who sows to please his sinful nature, from that nature will
reap destruction; the one who sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit
will reap eternal life. 9. Let us not become weary in doing good, for at
the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. 10. There-
fore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to
those who belong to the family of believers.

Genesis 4:2 Later she gave birth to his brother Abel. Now Abel kept
flocks, and Cain worked the soil. 3. In the course of time Cain brought
some of the fruits of the soil as an offering to the Lord. 4. But Abel
brought fat portions from some of the firstborn of his flock. The LORD
looked with favor on Abel and his offering, 5. but on Cain and his offer-
ing he did not look with favor. So Cain was very angry, and his face was "Therefore we pledge to bind
downcast. 6. Then the LORD said to Cain, "Why are you angry? Why is ourselves to one another, to embrace
your face downcast? 7. If you do what is right, will you not be accepted? our lowliest, to keep company with
But if you do not do what is right, sin is crouching at your door; it desires our loneliest, to educate our illiterate,
to have you, but you must master it." 8. Now Cain said to his brother to feed our starving, to clothe our
Abel, "Let's go out to the field." And while they were in the field, Cain ragged, to do all good things,
attacked his brother Abel and killed him. knowing that we are more than
keepers of our brothers and sisters.
We are our brothers and sisters."
Scripture References -Maya Angelou
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Accountability
You Complete Me
Or...Choosing a Partner For where two or three
are gathered together
Today let's look at what the Bible tells us about choosing an accountabil-
ity partner. in my name, there am
I in the midst of them.
Read: 1 Thessalonians 5:11 Matthew 18:20.

What is the purpose of an accountability partner?

Take this space and do some brainstorming about your ideal Account-
Let’s start with what an A.P. is not: ability group.
A Counselor: This isn’t someone who is there to give answers. An ac-
countability partner is there to ask questions. They can steer you to an-
swers in the scripture. *If your partner needs more help than you are
qualified to give, please seek out an adult!!*

A Fellowship Partner: Your time together is more than just “hanging

out.” Your questions should be about more than the score of the game
(Packers are going all the way next year) or politics (What did you think
of today’s inauguration of President Obama?)

The Boss of You: An accountability partner should not spend your time
together telling you what you should and should not be doing. He/she
can offer advice to a question you might have but you should both be
mindfull of the fact that Jesus is the ultimate answer to every question.

January 16, 2009

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A Session An accountability partner should be:

Now that you’ve chosen a partner, practiced giving and re-
ceiving feedback, and picked some areas that you need to be
held accountable for...what do you do with it all?
Close to you spiritually. I would not want Billy Graham holding me ac-
countable for my spiritual life. I would feel like an utter failure up
against his amazing life. I also wouldn’t want a local third grader asking
me if I’ve struggled with my thought life this week—capisce?

Weekly meetings are the best way to maintain and foster ac- He or she also needs to be someone trustworthy and discreet. If you
countability. When you get together your meeting might know that “Jane” always tells you everything about her friend “Betsy”
look a little like this: then you can be pretty sure that Betsy is hearing all about you. Is that the
person you want to share your deepest struggles with? I think not.
1. Pray. Invite God to be a part of your meeting. Ask him
to help you be sensitive in giving and receiving feedback. What are some attributes you’d like your ideal partner to have?
Ask for wisdom and guidance.
2. Take turns asking the questions you agreed to ask and
giving feedback about the past week.
3. Brainstorm ways to help be more Godly in the week
ahead. Brainstorm some names and pray
4. Pray. This would be a good time to practice that A.C.T. about some potential partners:
S. thing.

That’s it. Doesn’t look that daunting does it?

It isn’t. But whenever two or more are gathered in the name

of the Lord, he is there among them. You have a very im-
portant third guest...the same guest you should be aware of
all week long.
If you feel led to a certain person and want to take the next step, don’t
bowl them over. Ask them to pray about working with you. Keep your
eyes open for accountability partners may present themselves in unusual
ways.

It is time to restore the American precept that each individual is accountable for his actions.
Ronald Reagan
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Accountability 15. Did you struggle with a disappointment this week? How
did you handle it?
16. Have you respected and treated your classmates, co-workers and
Giving Feedback peers graciously by showing them compassion and the love of God in
A popular talk show host is fond of referring to the “Drive-By Media” your words and deeds? What can you do to enhance your relationships
meaning they give you a quick burst of something on the news but don’t here?
follow up. The same thing happens when we give “Hit and Run” feed- 17. How is your level of character, according to the comparison of Gal.
back to someone else. 5:22-23 versus Gal. 5:19-21?
18. How did you practice joy this week? Have you had a thankful atti-
For instance: a friend of yours is always late. At first you ignore it. tude toward God? Have you struggled with anger toward God? How
Then you start to get frustrated but don’t confront your friend. Finally so? What can you do about it?
you explode and dump all your frustration but your friend is clueless as 19. Have you taken care of the temple of the Holy Spirit with rest,
to why you just exploded. You both sleep, exercise, healthy eating, etc? What about addictions, gluttony, or
walk away upset and nothing gets substance abuse?
resolved. 20. Has your thoughts been kept pure?
21. Are you giving to the Lord's work with your time, talent, and treas-
Read Romans 1:11-12 ures? What about financially?
22. What do you need to do to improve your rela-
Why does Paul want to go and visit tionships with God and with others?
the church in Rome? 23. What do you see as your number one need or
struggle for this next week?
24. Have you compromised your integrity in any
way?
Right. Accountability is so that we 25. Did you lie about anything I just asked you?
can be mutually encouraged. That
means giving and receiving feedback
about the struggles we’re having. If Some verses to study in regard to these questions: Proverbs 25:12;
you find yourself in a position to give feedback (which you should be on 27:17; Ecclesiastes 4:8-12; Romans 14: 13-23; 2 Corinthians 12:19-
a weekly basis if you have an accountability partner) here are some tips: 13:6; Galatians 6: 1-6; Colossians 3:16; Ephesians 4:9-13; 1 Thessalo-
nians 5:14; James 5:15-16; Hebrews 3:13
1. Pick a good time—a set up, quiet time. Shouting feedback in the
halls between classes isn’t advisable.
Obviously you won’t be able to ask all of these questions every time...
you’d never have time to mess up and have interesting answers if you
did. Pick a couple that you think would be good for a partner to ask
2. Start with a positive—listening to things you need to improve on is you every week.
very hard. Starting with a positive (hey, you’ve been doing really great
getting your work done) helps soften the blow.

January 19, 2009 Accountability isn’t just weekly meetings with a “partner.” It also
means having friends who’ll punch your face when you need them to.
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Accountability 3. Describe the behavior specifically—”You’re always late” isn’t as help-

ful as “Last week you were 10 minutes late, the week before 15, and the
week before that 12.”
Top 25 Accountability Questions
1. Did you spend significant time with God through His Word, prayer,
quiet time, devotions, and other spiritual disciplines? How much; how 4. Make a suggestion or request—”I would appreciate it if you were on
constant? Is He your driving force? time next week because when you’re late it make me feel like you don’t
2. Have you faithfully served the Lord, His people, and the lost? value my time.”
3. Did you go and participate in church activities and worship this
week? How so? Why not?
4. Did you set spiritual goals this week? What were they? Did you
achieve your spiritual goals?
5. How have you struggled with sin? What are the sins that have 5. Check for understanding—this is as simple as
weighed down your walk with God this week? saying “Do you understand?” or “Do you have any
6. In what ways has God blessed you this week? How have you shared questions for me?”
your blessings?
7. What disappointments did you face? Did they consume your thoughts?
What did you do about it? What can you learn?
8. Have you filled the mandates of your call, work and school, practicing No doubt talking about how to give feedback has
excellence, and being the best 100% as you can be for His glory? brought to mind a specific situation in your life
9. Have you been alone in a compromising situation? Have you been flir- right now. Take the space below and write out how
tatious? Did you put yourself in a situation with a member of the opposite you can address this situation in your life.
sex that could appear to be compromising, even though it may not have
been?
10. Have you shared your faith? In what ways? How can you improve?
Have you had an opportunity to share with a non-Christian?
11. Have you been trustworthy? Have you lied? Stolen? Cheated? Been
Dishonest or Manipulative? Have you elevated yourself over another for
your own personal agenda? What about your language and attitude?
12. Have you allowed the media and its distortions in TV, music and
movies to unduly influence you? What about peer pressure?
13. Have you been prideful? Have you been guilty of Gossip or Anger? What do these verses have to say about anger?
Slandered? Shown Indifference? Been Greedy? Not Controlled your Proverbs 29:11 NIV, Proverbs 22: 24.
tongue? This hinders people from knowing and trusting Christ the most!
14. Have you demonstrated a servant's heart? How so? What have you
done for someone else this week?

Let me be clear - no one is above the law. Not a politician, not a priest, not a criminal,
January 21, 2009 not a police officer. We are all accountable for our actions. Antonio Villaraigosa
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Accountability
Accepting and Implementing Feedback
As difficult it is to tell someone when they are in need of a course correc-
tion, it is even worse to be on the receiving end. No one likes to be told
they are making a mistake or, in the case of an accountability relation-
ship, told that they are failing God. Ouch!
We want to tell the person to take their
suggestion and stick it straight in the
shredder. Do not pass go, do not collect
$200.
Read Acts 7:51-53
Does God ever call his people to ac-
count?
Read Proverbs 25:11-12
And it’s just as hard to accept chastisement from God as it is from a fel-
low person. Here’s some tips for accepting feedback:
1. Look at the person. Don’t use negative facial expressions.—don’t
scowl or get angry. Remember, they are trying to help.
2. Stay calm and quiet while the person is talking. Resist the urge to
defend yourself. No, I don’t want to hear it. Resist the urge.
January 20, 2009
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3. Show you understand. (Say, “Okay”
or “I understand.”)
4. Thank the person. Yep, you heard me.
Thank the person. “Thanks for sharing
that with me.
5. Pray about it and try to correct the problem.
What if I don’t feel I need to change what they said?
I’m so glad you asked. There may be times when you don’t believe
you need to stop (or start) doing something that your partner has rec-
ommended.
First, try to work it out. Have a rational, scripture-based conversation
about what is right or wrong in the situation. If you can’t agree, then
involve an impartial third party—youth pastor, adult sponsor, teacher,
etc...and agree to abide by his/her answer.
When was the last time someone gave you feedback? How did you
respond? How could you have done better? How could you have done
better?
Find a friend and practice this skill. Then come online and tell us how
it went.
For me, forgiveness and compassion are always linked: how do we hold people
accountable for wrongdoing and yet at the same time remain in touch with their humanity
enough to believe in their capacity to be transformed? -Bell Hooks