Erowid Experience Vaults Report Id: 92052

The Dragon and the Self

by The Wizard Dose: T+ 0:00 90 mg smoked DMT Body weight: 185.00 lbs Although this is my rst real experience with DMT Ive had extensive experiences primarily with LSD and psilocybin from my late teens to late twenties. Ive used LSD and psilocybin for meditative enhancement and consciousness introspection. Before I go any further I want to mention that nothing Ive read or learned about this substance, which was a lot prior to taking DMT, prepared me for what actually happened tonight. My experience is entirely subjective and may or may not correlate with other individuals experiences. In my life Ive thoroughly utilized and enjoyed entheogens for personal and spiritual growth. Im learning more and more as time goes on about the respect involved in taking these substances. They are not childs play. This experience is by far the most expansive with many stones left to turn. My intent was to expand my consciousness and see how deep I could go in a short time span due to the substances eect. Im calling this experience the rst although I had tried a very small sample of the batch of DMT I had extracted to see if I was heading in the right direction a few days prior. (That rst sample did nothing compared to what Im about to divulge. . . ) Ill briey explain how that experience went at the end of this testimonial. Regardless, I had nished multiple extractions and had tested the product a few days prior so I decided that tonight was the night to see if I could have a deep and transformative experience like I had researched and read about for quite some time. My girlfriend was very tired tonight so she did not want to partake but she informed me that she would be nearby in case I needed anything. (I love her, shes the greatest) I chose to use my large water pipe and loaded some cannabis ashes in the bowl, set a high amount of yellowish white DMT (90mg) on the ash with some tweezers then covered it with a little bud I had grown in my garden earlier this year. I did not take any other supplements or herbs. I turned on some Tibetan meditation music and centered myself for a few minutes. Once I felt grounded I took a deep breath and grabbed the water pipe. I checked my clock at 12:00AM then took a galactic hit and relaxed on the couch while exhaling sweet smoke of cannabis and Deem. . . . . . . As soon as the back of my head touched the pillow I muttered, Oh wow. . . , and I felt my head tilt over to the left as I suddenly lost connection with my body and felt the couch sink into the ground. The rst thing I thought was, Well buddy, you did it this time. You put too much in there. Youre in it for the long haulto go. I couldnt feel my body but I could still technically see and had a eld of vision. I wasnt exactly physically high since I had no physical body, my consciousness was condensed to my eld of vision and I felt like a body of energy or thought. My consciousness felt as if it was around eye level to a few inches higher. The separation from my body was very abrupt, startling, and sudden. It took me a second to gather my wits through the blackness of transfer from one level of consciousness to the other. I suddenly found myself powder / crystals

Exp Year: 2011 Added to Database: Jan 16, 2013 Gender of reportee: male
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Erowid Experience ID: 92052

The Dragon and the Self

by The Wizard

in outer space, or some sort of space. I knew I existed, but not as the normal me that I, my friends and family know. I was simply an observer, of what I had no clue yet, and my ego had been completely smashed and obliterated to a pulp. I was extremely startled at rst. I forgot who I was. I had forgotten everything about myself in the 3rd dimension. I had no sense of time. I couldnt breathe, I couldnt feel a heartbeat but I did feel a never ending burst of energy ame residing in what would be my heart if I had one. Words really dont give this experience much justice so please bear with me. . . . I couldnt move since I really didnt have a self to move with. I found myself as a piece of energy consciousness suspended in a dark multidimensional space with what I perceived to be an even darker line in the distance that seemed to be rotating my way. (It sort of looked like a huge piece of space debris oating towards me.) When I tried to focus my attention on it, it would grow another line that would pop out of one of the sides of the initial line. Suddenly, there were ashes of wave energy that originated from what I perceived to be a horizon in the dark distance behind the line. I then heard, This is love, and I felt a level of love and peace that I cant really put on paper. This love was similar to what I had felt when meditating alone without substances but much stronger and coupled with visuals and sounds that linked to my feelings at a higher vibrational level. I felt a lot of electricity. The ashes lit up the space I was in and the feeling of being dead and away from my body grew. At this point I believed I was in this space forever. Although initially startled, I had no problems with being there whatsoever. Once I realized that I was dead and I had let go and was startled by this HUGE golden dragon that burst out of the horizon. It was the size of multiple galaxies and it radiated electric energy of various colors. Although I had no ears I could still hear. I suddenly heard, This is your channel. Youre building this channel. Let this transmission be manifested. I then thought, What else is on my channel? After thinking this the black space shattered and I was suddenly oating in front of four squares that were connected and formed a cross in the middle. There was what I perceived to be a Buddha in one square and Shiva in another. I had no idea why they were there, but it seemed ok to me. Ive read on these religions but have held no particular following or dedication to either. The other two squares had dragons and there were spinning yin yang symbols on the corners of the squares. At this point I thought I was still dead and I had been there forever. I stayed and communicated with these entities for what appeared to be an eternity. (We were exchanging what I perceived to be vibrational tones and pings) I was then suddenly distracted by a blemish in the construct. It seemed to be a blur that didnt belong in my eld of vision. Once I noticed this I started to hear the meditation music and felt a split in reality. I tried to refocus on the Buddha and Shiva as they would ow with the Tibetan meditation music that I had playing back in our dimension of reality. Every track on the CD represented a dierent chakra point and I suddenly realized that the music was coming from my living room. As soon as I realized this I stared at the Buddha and Shiva for some reason and I heard myself on the couch muttering, Ah, I see what you mean. (This may have been the spoken translation of the vibrational tone I was sending at that very second) Right after I said this the Buddha and Shiva looked at me startled and changed color. They put their ngers on their lips and said, Sssshhhhh. I immediately said, Oh my. Im so sorry. I didnt mean to talk with that voice. My eld of vision started to morph in and stretch in a chaotic manner. The square started to spin and I started to realize that I wasnt
Exp Year: 2011 Added to Database: Jan 16, 2013 Gender of reportee: male
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Erowid Experience ID: 92052

The Dragon and the Self

by The Wizard

dead but that I was out of my body and due to return at some point. The more I lost focus and started realizing my 3rd dimensional self laying on the couch, the more distorted the square and gures became. I started to feel my heartbeat and it was racing at high velocity. I felt a little bit of panic. I suddenly heard, Focus on us. Please stop focusing on yourself. You cant talk to us with him. You must recalibrate now. Come back next round. I then felt the urge to focus more intensely on my surroundings so I could forget I was lying on the couch. I could feel my heartbeat going away. It took a few seconds but I found myself feeling detached from my body again. I then heard, We must go to the other side so you can return to where you were just at. I faced a new challenge with the sudden shift from higher to lower consciousness in the middle of the vision. I found myself once again in a suspended space but there were dark shapes and humanoid forms oating around everywhere. I heard, This is part of the self, selshness. They looked like demon and goblin clouds but they werent threatening in any way. I replied, Yes, that makes sense. For some reason I then realized that I had the ability to zoom in and out to pinpoint anything I wanted to see in extreme detail. A white square would form around a nebulous demon face and would become more detailed and animated. Whats strange here is that I heard another version of myself annotate, Yes, everything must be categorized. Everything has its purpose. I started to see dierent nebulous forms ranging from ebony to bright white. I then heard, You see? They are like seasons. Things are built and things are broken down. Its a beautiful cycle. I once again replied, Yes, that makes sense. I then heard a soothing voice say, Dont start thinking that youll stay like this forever, its always changing. I then experienced another round of visual seasons of positive and negative energy in my eld of view and saw various beautiful nebulous blasts of what appeared to be cosmic rays and explosions. My eld of vision was engulfed in high speed lights and animated whizzing sounds. I started to get engulfed in the visions and began to once again believe I was dead and traversing some other dimensional plane for eternity. . . . The lights and sounds suddenly stopped and I was once again in that dark space where I had started the quest. I felt comfortable here but I felt the presence of two large converging forces on either side of me. I once again had no sense of self. I was more of a neutral observer. To my left appeared a cosmic force of what I perceived to be Aztec or Mayan warriors and to my right appeared a force of what appeared to be Knights Templar in full armor and shields. (Yes, with red crosses on them.) They were clashing in the middle of this oating galaxy with vivid colors and bursts of sounds and lights. I was so deep into this vision that I wasnt even realizing at the time that the meditation music was coming from the living room. It seemed to blend in with the vision perfectly and the entities I was seeing were intelligently dancing and ghting to the music and even changing their colors and dimensions moments before the music would transform at critical note changes as if they knew what parts were coming up. I suddenly heard, These forces are clashing for channels. The voice then said, Theres way more here than meets the eye. I suddenly felt a vibration in my eld of vision and I started seeing dierent symbols and images all around. Some were organized and some were very chaotic and dismembered. (Complete random images) I felt as if I was ying through all of these images, like going through a tube. After what felt like an eternity of gathering random information while hearing a narrative voice explaining
Exp Year: 2011 Added to Database: Jan 16, 2013 Gender of reportee: male
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Erowid Experience ID: 92052

The Dragon and the Self

by The Wizard

what I was seeing, I started to feel myself getting closer to my body and my living room. I could then feel my eyes and face. Next, my chest arms and legs. I nally opened my eyes and everything in the room was vibrating and the meditation music was still humming away. It was 12:21AM. That entire experience took 21 minutes. (I think thats a fairly long time compared to average) It felt like an eternity. I was very excited to say the least and I had a strange vibrational body high. I pulled out my laptop and started typing. . . ..this was an amazing rst experience. I felt a connection to that space that I cant really explain any further. This is the 2nd time Ive tried it and the rst time I purposefully only took a miniscule amount to make sure that my extraction had gone well. (Im thinking I had beginners luck) The rst experience had mainly visuals, no out of body experience, but I saw a Golden dragon, Aztecs, Mayans and squares with gures in them. I nd it interesting that I went back to that place again; since I took a sure re amount to ensure a deep ride. (Sure re amount for me, 90mg) Ive never experienced an ego smash like that as well. It was a taste of death that held no fear at all. (Although I was startled) It was very natural and more of a simple transition. Its denitely educational and worth learning to master the smoothness of the experience. I nd it very interesting and valuable to be able to learn about what is perceivably an eternitys worth of feelings and information in 21 minutes. Being startled like I had been really woke me up and I feel more alive now than I have in a long time. It seems that the self can get in the way with the smoothness of some of these experiences. I seriously thought I had died and traveled to another reality. Now that Ive felt that transition maybe I wont think Im dying again the next time. Not that it really matters. Im looking forward to building more on this channel. . .

Exp Year: 2011 Added to Database: Jan 16, 2013 Gender of reportee: male
A Generated by exp pdf.pl v.1.35 using perl & pdfL TEX on Mon Oct 14 10:47:41 2013 GMT.

http://erowid.org/experiences/exp.php?ID=92052 c 2013 by erowid.org