The Secret Life of Walter Mitty

by James Thurber "The Secret Life of Walter Mitty," first published in 1941, is one of James Thurber's most ell!"no n and belo#ed stories$ %ts famous prota&onist holds a place in the cultural le'icon, meritin& his o n entry in (n&lish!lan&ua&e dictionaries$ %n 194), *orman McLeod directed an M+M Technicolor musical ith the same title based on Thurber's story$ The film, hich e'tends Mitty's ima&inary ad#entures o#er a t o!day period, stars ,anny -aye as the affable daydreamer$ "We're going through!" The Commander's voice was like thin ice breaking !e wore his full"dress uniform# with the heavily braided white ca$ $ulled down rakishly over one cold gray eye "We can't make it# sir %t's s$oiling for a hurricane# if you ask me " "%'m not asking you# Lieutenant &erg#" said the Commander "Throw on the $ower lights! 'ev her u$ to (#)**! We're going through!" The $ounding of the cylinders increased+ ta"$ocketa"$ocketa" $ocketa"poc"eta!poc"eta The Commander stared at the ice forming on the $ilot window !e walked over and twisted a row of com$licated dials "Switch on ,o ( au-iliary!" he shouted "Switch on ,o ( au-iliary!" re$eated Lieutenant &erg ".ull strength in ,o / turret!" shouted the Commander ".ull strength in ,o / turret!" The crew# bending to their various tasks in the huge# hurtling eight"engined ,avy hydro$lane# looked at each other and grinned "The old man will get us through" they said to one another "The 0ld Man ain't afraid of !ell!" ",ot so fast! 1ou're driving too fast!" said Mrs Mitty "What are you driving so fast for2" "!mm2" said Walter Mitty !e looked at his wife# in the seat beside him# with shocked astonishment She seemed grossly unfamiliar# like a strange woman who had yelled at him in a crowd "1ou were u$ to fifty"five#" she said "1ou know % don't like to go more than forty 1ou were u$ to fifty"five " Walter Mitty drove on toward Waterbury in silence# the roaring of the S,3*3 through the worst storm in twenty years of ,avy flying fading in the remote# intimate airways of his mind "1ou're tensed u$ again#" said Mrs Mitty "%t's one of your days % wish you'd let 4r 'enshaw look you over " Walter Mitty sto$$ed the car in front of the building where his wife went to have her hair done "'emember to get those overshoes while %'m having my hair done#" she said "% don't need overshoes#" said Mitty She $ut her mirror back into her bag "We've been all through that#" she said# getting out of the car "1ou're not a young man any longer " !e raced the engine a little "Why don't you wear your gloves2 !ave you lost your gloves2" Walter Mitty reached in a $ocket and brought out the gloves !e $ut them on# but after she had turned and gone into the building and he had driven on to a red light# he took them off again "5ick it u$# brother!" sna$$ed a co$ as the light changed# and Mitty hastily $ulled on his gloves and lurched ahead !e drove around the streets aimlessly for a time# and then he drove $ast the hos$ital on his way to the $arking lot "%t's the millionaire banker# Wellington McMillan#" said the $retty nurse "1es2" said Walter Mitty# removing his gloves slowly "Who has the case2" "4r 'enshaw and 4r &enbow# but there are two s$ecialists here# 4r 'emington from ,ew 1ork and Mr
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5ritchard"Mitford from London !e flew over " 6 door o$ened down a long# cool corridor and 4r 'enshaw came out !e looked distraught and haggard "!ello# Mitty#" he said "We're having the devil's own time with McMillan# the millionaire banker and close $ersonal friend of 'oosevelt 0bstreosis of the ductal tract Tertiary Wish you'd take a look at him " "7lad to#" said Mitty %n the o$erating room there were whis$ered introductions+ "4r 'emington# 4r Mitty Mr 5ritchard"Mitford# 4r Mitty " "%'ve read your book on stre$tothricosis#" said 5ritchard"Mitford# shaking hands "6 brilliant $erformance# sir " "Thank you#" said Walter Mitty "4idn't know you were in the States# Mitty#" grumbled 'emington "Coals to ,ewcastle# bringing Mitford and me u$ here for a tertiary " "1ou are very kind#" said Mitty 6 huge# com$licated machine# connected to the o$erating table# with many tubes and wires# began at this moment to go $ocketa"$ocketa"$ocketa "The new anestheti8er is giving way!" shouted an intern "There is no one in the 9ast who knows how to fi- it!" ":uiet# man!" said Mitty# in a low# cool voice !e s$rang to the machine# which was going $ocketa" $ocketa";uee$"$ocketa";uee$ !e began fingering delicately a row of glistening dials "7ive me a fountain $en!" he sna$$ed Someone handed him a fountain $en !e $ulled a faulty $iston out of the machine and inserted the $en in its $lace "That will hold for ten minutes#" he said "7et on with the o$eration " 6 nurse hurried over and whis$ered to 'enshaw# and Mitty saw the man turn $ale "Coreo$sis has set in#" said 'enshaw nervously "%f you would take over# Mitty2" Mitty looked at him and at the craven figure of &enbow# who drank# and at the grave# uncertain faces of the two great s$ecialists "%f you wish#" he said They sli$$ed a white gown on him< he ad=usted a mask and drew on thin gloves< nurses handed him shining "&ack it u$# Mac! Look out for that &uick!" Walter Mitty =ammed on the brakes "Wrong lane# Mac#" said the $arking"lot attendant# looking at Mitty closely "7ee 1eh#" muttered Mitty !e began cautiously to back out of the lane marked "9-it 0nly " "Leave her sit there#" said the attendant "%'ll $ut her away " Mitty got out of the car "!ey# better leave the key " "0h#" said Mitty# handing the man the ignition key The attendant vaulted into the car# backed it u$ with insolent skill# and $ut it where it belonged They're so damn cocky# thought Walter Mitty# walking along Main Street< they think they know everything 0nce he had tried to take his chains off# outside ,ew Milford# and he had got them wound around the a-les 6 man had had to come out in a wrecking car and unwind them# a young# grinning garageman Since then Mrs Mitty always made him drive to the garage to have the chains taken off The ne-t time# he thought# %'ll wear my right arm in a sling< they won't grin at me then %'ll have my right arm in a sling and they'll see % couldn't $ossibly take the chains off myself !e kicked at the slush on the sidewalk "0vershoes#" he said to himself# and he began looking for a shoe store When he came out into the street again# with the overshoes in a bo- under his arm# Walter Mitty began to wonder what the other thing was his wife had told him to get She had told him# twice# before they set out from their house for Waterbury %n a way he hated these weekly tri$s to town"he was always getting something wrong >leene-# he thought# S;uibb's# ra8or blades2 ,o Tooth$aste# toothbrush# bicarbonate# cardorundum# initiative and referendum2 !e gave it u$ &ut she would remember it "Where's the what's"its"name#" she would ask "4on't tell me you forgot the what's"its"name " 6 newsboy went by shouting

something about the Waterbury trial "5erha$s this will refresh your memory " The 4istrict 6ttorney suddenly thrust a heavy automatic at the ;uiet figure on the witness stand "!ave you ever seen this before2" Walter Mitty took the gun and e-amined it e-$ertly "This is my Webley"?ickers )* (*#" he said calmly 6n e-cited bu88 ran around the courtroom The @udge ra$$ed for order "1ou are a crack shot with any sort of firearms# % believe2" said the 4istrict 6ttorney# insinuatingly "0b=ection!" shouted Mitty's attorney "We have shown that the defendant could not have fired the shot We have shown that he wore his right arm in a sling on the night of the fourteenth of @uly " Walter Mitty raised his hand briefly and the bickering attorneys were stilled "With any known make of gun#" he said evenly# "% could have killed 7regory .it8hurst at three hundred feet with my left hand " 5andemonium broke loose in the courtroom 6 woman's scream rose above the bedlam and suddenly a lovely# dark"haired girl was in Walter Mitty's arms The 4istrict 6ttorney struck at her savagely Without rising from his chair# Mitty let the man have it on the $oint of the chin "1ou miserable cur!" "5u$$y biscuit#" said Walter Mitty !e sto$$ed walking and the buildings of Waterbury rose u$ out of the misty courtroom and surrounded him again 6 woman who was $assing laughed "!e said '5u$$y biscuit'#" she said to her com$anion "That man said '5u$$y biscuit' to himself " Walter Mitty hurried on !e went into an 6A5# not the first one he came to but a smaller one farther u$ the street "% want some biscuit for small# young dogs#" he said to the clerk "6ny s$ecial brand# sir2" The greatest $istol shot in the world thought a moment "%t says '5u$$ies &ark for %t' on the bo-#" said Walter Mitty !is wife would be through at the hairdresser's in fifteen minutes# Mitty saw in looking at his watch# unless they had trouble drying it< sometimes they had trouble drying it She didn't like to get to the hotel first< she would want him to be there waiting for her as usual !e found a big leather chair in the lobby# facing a window# and he $ut the overshoes and the $u$$y biscuit on the floor beside it !e $icked u$ an old co$y of Liberty and sank down into the chair "Can 7ermany Con;uer the World Through the 6ir2" Walter Mitty looked at the $ictures of bombing $lanes and of ruined streets "The cannonading has got the wind u$ in young 'aleigh# sir#" said the sergeant Ca$tain Mitty looked u$ at him through tousled hair "7et him to bed#" he said wearily "With the others %'ll fly alone " "&ut you can't# sir#" said the sergeant an-iously "%t takes two men to handle that bomber and the 6rchies are $ounding hell out of the air ?on 'ichtman's circus is between here and Saulier " "Somebody's got to get that ammunition dum$#" said Mitty "%'m going over S$ot of brandy2" !e $oured a drink for the sergeant and one for himself War thundered and whined around the dugout and battered at the door There was a rending of wood and s$linters flew through the room "6 bit of a near thing#" said Ca$tain Mitty carelessly "The bo- barrage is closing in#" said the sergeant "We only live once# Sergeant#" said Mitty with his faint# fleeting smile "0r do we2" !e $oured another brandy and tossed it off "% never see a man could hold his brandy like you# sir#" said the sergeant "&egging your $ardon# sir " Ca$tain Mitty stood u$ and stra$$ed on his huge Webley"?ickers automatic "%t's forty kilometers through hell# sir#" said the sergeant Mitty finished one last brandy "6fter all#" he said softly# "what isn't2" The $ounding of the cannon increased< there was the rat"tat"tatting of machine guns# and from somewhere came the menacing $ocketa"$ocketa"$ocketa of the new flame"throwers Walter Mitty walked to

the door of the dugout humming "6u$rBs de Ma &londe " !e turned and waved to the sergeant "Cheerio!" he said Something struck his shoulder "%'ve been looking all over this hotel for you#" said Mrs Mitty "Why do you have to hide in this old chair2 !ow did you e-$ect me to find you2" "Things close in#" said Walter Mitty vaguely "What2" Mrs Mitty said "4id you get the what's"its"name2 The $u$$y biscuit2 What's in that bo-2" "0vershoes#" said Mitty "Couldn't you have $ut them on in the store2" "% was thinking#" said Walter Mitty "4oes it ever occur to you that % am sometimes thinking2" She looked at him "%'m going to take your tem$erature when % get you home#" she said They went out through the revolving doors that made a faintly derisive whistling sound when you $ushed them %t was two blocks to the $arking lot 6t the drugstore on the corner she said# "Wait here for me % forgot something % won't be a minute " She was more than a minute Walter Mitty lighted a cigarette %t began to rain# rain with sleet in it !e stood u$ against the wall of the drugstore# smoking !e $ut his shoulders back and his heels together "To hell with the handkerchief#" said Walter Mitty scornfully !e took one last drag on his cigarette and sna$$ed it away Then# with that faint# fleeting smile $laying about his li$s# he faced the firing s;uad< erect and motionless# $roud and disdainful# Walter Mitty the Cndefeated# inscrutable to the last