Seleste Lopez

Crichton
Ap Lang Period 5
1 December 2013
Orange to Apples: Heels to Sandals
Sometimes two different topics have more in common than expected. Analyze how an
orange and apple compare and contrast, or a sandal and a high heel; both items share the same
function but each carry particular characteristics. Two different books written by the same
author must share the same style in writing but with two different stories, the use of literary
devices have a different effect. John Krakauer, wrote Into Thin Air a biography of his account
on Mt. Everest, as well as Where Men Win Glory a story on a rising NFL player, Pat Tillman,
who lost his life in Afghanistan; each of these stories possessed syntax, and diction that
emphasized the point of the novels.
Throughout Where Men Win Glory, when Krakauer describes sports or games it was
much different than his vocabulary in the rest of the novel. Football terminology was being used
and sentences became long and choppy. Krakauer writes With less than two minutes
remaining in the game, Green attempted to run the ball into the end zone, but he fumbled on the
ASU three-yard line, and Pat dived on the loose ball, his change in syntax and diction kept
his readers intrigued, forcing them to read more because of the suspense. Also, Krakauers
knowledge was not only present when he was talking about sports but also when he changed his
story from Tillman to Afghanistan. Giving the readers background information on what was
happening before terrorists started attacking the U.S, gave Krakauer credibility- which appeals to
ethos. Krakauers choice of detail is the most prominent out of all his literary tools that were
used. Providing extra details on a few characters and leaving out some on others let readers
know who was important and who was not. Several times the use of specific detail
foreshadowed later events, deciding to give stories about Tillmans childhood that highlighted
his key traits helped readers understand his later actions. Tillman who was described as very
protective, did not surprise readers when he physically abused another person for bullying his
friend. The way Krakauer wrote in Where Men Win Glory was very similar to Into Thin Air but
some literary tools were used more than others.
Krakauer wrote Into Thin Air on his expedition to the top of Mt. Everest, being a retired
climber, readers expected Krakauer to have prior knowledge on the sport. His use of vocabulary
that pertained to climbing and comments that questioned other climbers skills showed that
Krakauer knew what he was writing about- just like Where Men Win Glory. Giving the readers
facts about Everest throughout the book, let readers know the dangers and struggles of climbing.
His choice of detail was, again, very prominent in this novel as well, for the use of giving readers
an insight of who/what he was surrounded by. Extra detail on a characters history was a readers
way of identifying importance; some may argue that a few details could have been omitted, but
they were each used to represent a foreshadowing event. One writing tool that Krakauer used
more in Into Thin Air was his use of parentheses, dashes, and footnotes. Several times in this
novel the use of a dash or a set of parentheses was to add an opinion. For instance, Krakauer
wrote tongue of ice that flows down from the south flank of Everest and would serve as our
highway- I hoped mightily- to the summit (53 Krakauer). This writing tool was used more in
this novel than Where Men Win Glory, where Krakauer had to describe a story other than his
own. In Into Thin Air Krakauer writes from his experience to Mt.Everests history of climbers.
The history of previous climbers were used to justify actions that were taken in his expedition,
this is where footnotes came into action. He would write Even though we clients wouldnt be
asked to share in the load haulings* and under the page Krakauer would have *Ever since the
first Everest attempts, most expeditions- commercial and noncommercial alike- have relied
on...(78). Krakauer would use a footnote to describe something in brief instead of going into
detail and ultimately losing the reader in the process.
In both novels it was apparent that the same writer wrote both books, however, the
literary tools served differently in each. Into Thin Air was a personal story while Where Men
Win Glory was another mans story. Two different books where readers would expect no
similarities contained many due to the authors writing style. Just like the orange and apple,
sandal and heels there are always going to be similarities and differences.

Comparison and Contrast Essay Scoring Rubric:
Superior Strong Adequate Developing Very weak Incompetent
Quality and
clarity of
thought
Explores the
topic
thoughtfully
and in depth
Shows some
depth and
complexity of
thought
May treat
the topic
simplistically
or
repetitively
Lacks focus,
or
demonstrates
confused or
simplistic
thinking
Lacks focus
and
coherence,
and often
fails to
communicate
ideas
Unfocused,
illogical, or
incoherent
Diction Uses concrete
and concise
diction
Uses many
vivid verbs
and concrete
nouns
Uses some
vivid verbs
and concrete
nouns
Uses a few
vivid verbs
and concrete
nouns
Diction is not
concise and
concrete
Little or no
thought given
to word
choice
Syntax Successful
use of
sentence
variety and
parallelism
Good use of
sentence
variety and
parallelism
Use of
sentence
variety and
parallelism
Uses some
parallelism,
but has
trouble using
good
sentence
variety
Sentences
contain
simplistic
structure and
little
parallelism
Sentences are
incomplete or
not structured
Organization Coherently Well- Adequately Poorly Weak Disorganized
organized organized organized organized organization
Support Ideas
supported by
apt reasons
and well-
chosen
examples
Ideas
supported by
appropriate
reasons and
examples
Adequately
developed
Presents
generalizatio
ns w/o
adequate
support or
presents
details w/o
generalizatio
ns
Provides
simplistic
generalization
s without
support
Provides little
or no relevant
support
MLA format
and citation
Uses MLA
format and
citation at a
professional
level
Uses MLA
format and
citation
Little
formatting or
citation errors
Attempts to
use MLA
format and
citation
(with some
errors)
Problems
with format
and citation
Not typed in
MLA format;
sources are
not cited
Figurative
language and
voice
Makes
sophisticated
use of
figurative
language to
create strong
personal
voice
Makes strong
use of
figurative
language to
create
personal
voice
Makes use of
figurative
language to
create voice
Attempts to
use
figurative
language to
create voice
Uses little
figurative
language;
lacks
personal
voice
No figurative
language; no
personal
voice