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~ " THE UNIVERSITY OF AUCKLAND ~

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\ Te Kura Akoranga 0 Tamaki Makaurau I
\ INCORPORATING THE AUCKLAND COLLEGE OF EDUCATION I
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, KOHIA TEACHERS CENTRE I
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~~ BOYS I N ~I /

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\ EARLY
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CH I L.DHOOD EDUCATION I
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\ KOHIA TEACHERS CENTRE I
\ GATE 1, 78 EPSOM AVENUE, EPSOM, AUCKLAND I
~ Private Bag 99946, Newmarket, Auckland ~
\ . Phone (09) 623 8977 I
\ Fax (09) 623 8979 I
\ Email kohia@auckland.ac.nz I
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V~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~

The tputh about
those' missing
socks and keys
• Every woman has had the
following conversation with a
man standing by an open fridge:
Him: "VVhere have you put the
butter?"
Her: "In the fridge."
Him: "I can't see it."
Her: "Well. I put it in there 10
minutes ago."
Him: "You must have put it some-
where else - it's definitEly not here!"
A(this. she thrusts her arm into the
fridge and. as if by magic, produces
a tub of butter.
Men sometimes feel this is a trick
and accuse women of hiding things.
Women. on the other hand, think men
play dumb deliberately - just :0 drive
them mad. But the biological fact is
often men genuinely cant see their
"lost" socks and keys,
Genetically, women have two X
chromosomes, compared with men's
one. Among other things, this gives
women a greater variety of cone-
shape cells in the eyes, which, in
turn, give them superior colour vision.
Women also have wider peripheral
vision, As traditional "nest deiend-
.ers", women have developed brain
soft-ware which gives them an arc
of at least 45 degrees clear Vision to
each side of the neao and the same
broad spectrum of vision above
and below the nose, In fact. many
women's peripheral vision is enecuve
up to almost 180 degrees.
In contrast. as hunters, men have
evolved a type of long-distance
tunnel vision, allowing them to see
accurately over longer distances
- rather like a pair of binocolars.
44 New Zealand Woman's Weekly
-
Why women tall{ so rnucil
- and men so little
Cil Research shows women can speak 20,000 to
25,000 words a day, compared to a men's 7000 to
10,000. And, in childhood, not only do girls start
talking earlier than boys but a three-year-old girl
has nearly twice the vocabulary of a boy of the
same age. Why?
For males, speech isn't a specific brain
skill. It operates solely in the lett of the
brain but has no specific location. When
a man talks, brain scans show the entire
left hemisphere of his brain becomes
active as it searches to find a centre
for speech but is unable to find one.
Consequently, men aren't physically
equipped to be good at talking.
Women, however, have specific
areas in the brain devoted to speech
-located primarily in the front left
hemisphere, with another smaller,
specific area in the right hemisphere.
Having speech in both hemispheres
means that, unlike men, women can
talk and watch TV at the same time
or talk about several different subjects
at once,
Male brains are highly ccrnpart-
mentalised and have the ability to separate
and store information, At the end of a day
full of problems, a man's brain can file them
all away. If he's used up his 70aO-word quota,
he has no desire to communicate any more -
he's happy to gaze at the fire or read the paper.
The female brain, on the other hand, doesn't
store information in this way - the problems just
keep going around in a woman's head. If she hasn't
had the opportunity to use up her 20,000 words, she feels
the need to speak the remaining balance of her quota. Men
can perceive this as nagging but it's Rat. Her objective is to
discharge the problems, not find conclusions or solutions.
 -

Developmental Stages of Boys

0-3
Mother: Nurture and love, feeding and softness.
Father: Voice in womb, holds, smells feels, sounds,
does things differently. The difference is what is
. important.
Gender identity set by 'three.

4-6 .-
Mother: Gentleness; warmth and language
.Father: Large motor skills, male affirmation and hear
male language
Love and modelling

7-13
Father: is the 'hero' major modelling and sense of
. \<

affirmation and worthiness.

Teaching is very important. Skills and outward
orientation.
The doing 'side of the human being. Same gender
approval from dad is essential.
Mother: is important anchor and emotional teacher.

14-21
Boy: move to other men in the community.
Father: becomes increasingly stupid and falls off the
idealised pedestal. Needs kindness and boundary.
17 is the. worst and then comes back at 21- 23 as an equal
adult if dad will let him .. -
Mother: Needs to break away from mum to gain gender
identity and independence ..
 -

Boys' Differences By Warwick Pudney 2007

Thinking -Linear Thinking

Good for problem solving, fixing things, inventing things
Focussing on one thing, purposeful
Finds out how things work
Begins and follows to a conclusion or solution
Sometimes called scientific, rational, logical or cause/effect
Active and moves directionally to an end
Tends to be black and white
Seeks boundaries and compartments
Created by testosterone in no~al boys brain development

Doing -Active and kinaesthetic.

Likes physical action, being outside, engages physically, produces things,
sport,
Rough and tumble. Experiences power physically. Communicates
physically. Success/solution by doing something.
Less focus on the emotional and verbal
TV and film programmes for males express this difference
When under threat will go 'into a cave' and sort out a solution before talking
about it.
Doing links to the linear thinking

Testosterone - Male hormone

Secreted at 7 weeks in foetus to form male genitals, different brain
functioning and greater body size
Associated with aggression and purpose and intention.
Sensitive to hierarchy, power and order.

Pbysical- Stronger male body

Males have 30% more muscle tissue.
Equips protector roles and allows bursts of powerful energy.
Doing and action linked. Explores and expresses with the body

C: Warwick: Differences with boys

 -

Emotions -repressed
Men are supposed to repress all emotions except maybe anger.
Anger is the emotion necessary for the protector role.
All vulnerability is contained and managed
Some vulnerability is allowed after the female has done her expression.
Causes illness from unexpressed emotions

Roles- expectation of strength to rescue and protect

The two main ones are:
Protector- Growing in importance due to less safety
Provider- still a first expectation when men and women have a choice
Nurturer- has been lost and needs to be reclaimed
Boys are taught to be strong and stand up for themselves from an early age.
They are held less, talked to less, nurtured less and protected less as part of
their training. They are punished and hit more.
Emotional repression greater physicality, testosterone and focussed thinking
aid the protector.

In a world where differences have not been acknowledged, the use of

feminised processes and content has been assumed as normal and generic
when infact it has discriminated against boys achievement.

C: Warwick: Differences with boys

 -

Boys Brains

By Warwick Pudney 2006

Boys have Linear thinking. They like to move through a project in a linear

way.

Boys like to begin and follow through to a conclusion. It is intentional and

moves directionally to an end.

Boys like to approach something one step at a time.

Boys cannot take in many steps or take great detail in at one time.

Boys will focus hard and move in steps or sections towards a whole.

Boys need completion, solution, and resolution.

Boys think in a more black and white manner.

Boys eliminate peripheral issues and often have tunnel vision.

Boys can compartmentalise parts of their lives and relationships.

Boys like to solve problems, fix things and invent things ..

Boys focus on one thing purposefully and are not so good at multi-tasking.

Boys' thinking is sometimes called logical, scientific, and rational.

Boys often use numbers to measure success or validity.

The above commences development at conception and is triggered by testosterone, as

normal boys' brain development. This development continues through childhood and
adolescence .

•
 -

Boy-friendly Early Childhood Education

By Warwick Pudney 2006

Does Your Early Childhood Centre have:

• Close links with fathers and does it ensure their involvement

• Strong input from ethnic communities

• Culturally-matched educators

• Male 'heroes' to come in and teach specific activities

• Strong routines and few changes

• Clear rules

• Standard interpretation and implementation of the rules

• Black and white consistency about the rules

• Engagement that has a sense of 'power-over' for a boy's good, rather than to

satisfy a staff/parent ego

• Literature and language that reflects the background of the boys

• Acknowledgement systems that build internal identity and respect

• A sense of 'village' or 'community' to proudly identify with

• Staffwho are secure in self and role and thus can act with calmness

• A culture of respect; for self and others

•
 -

Things to do with Boys in Early Childhood Centres

By Warwick Pudney 2007
Make volcanoes in the sandpit
Kick balls up trees and work out how to get them out
Dig for bones that have been buried. Pretend to be archaeologists
Run and jump through newspaper
Bring dogs and wash them
Wash cars
Wash babies and learn how to be gentle
Go bug hunting. Name bugs than release them
Make up imaginary names for insects
Keep a garden. Grow fast growing flowers and veges
Dig holes and tunnels
Go to the 'big kids' playground
Keep animals eg worm farm, rats
Feed boys who are upset. It may be due to hunger
Bring body parts and dead things
Dissect organs
Talk about life and death
Have a box with different size nuts and bolts
Examine road kill
Paint each other body or face
....Feed ants honey and watch them march
Keep odd building objects screws, hinges knobs
Go on a bear hunt outside
Have a bike day Decorate bikes
Play hide and seek
Make fruit pizzas
Fossilize bones in concrete and make up skeletons
Make concrete stepping stones with mosaic tops or handprints/footprints
Play 'who is missing' . One of class hides under the blanket
Cloud -watching
Get boys to help set up the outside obstacle course
General
Have action displays
Keep photos of things to make
Make up kitset card, wood bird house, garage
Give enthusiasm to start boys into activity
Encourage things to make sense of belonging or home
Use community organizations and grants
Take part in a play
Show a lead. Be a model
Give reasons for why we are doing a thing
Have real tools
Use computers
Challenge boys
Be aware of the time of day
Be aware of peer pressure
Have a boy-friendly play area
Dig tunnels. Have pipes for cars
Have a male parent present
Have consistent rules
Give praise for active play
Stick to the rules
Notice and affirm peer learning
Learn, sensitise, name and validate feelings
Develop mutual respect amongst peers

Physical
Do patterned man-shakes
Do arm-wrestling
Get a wrestling mat and develop boundaried games and combat
Touch and hold boys especially on arms and hands
Rough and tumble
Have climbing options

Imagination
Have time to be a monster -scary time
Encourage superhero play
Discuss the good done by superheroes
Have appropriate dress-ups for superheroes
Tell stories of excitement of danger

By Warwick Pudney 2007

~&S .- ~tL- 'D; ;--,s;d cv\Q_.

ft o~_ W \"-\-ttx Ol \61Ld i .
 -

Boys in Early Childhood Centres

By Warwick Pudney 2007

Dads
Have a 'dads and boys' working bee
Have a regular repair man who interacts during session hours
Pay mentor men with specials skills to do mentoring work
Invite Kapa haka groups in
Invite tradesmen to talk
Cut off small branches in trees to facilitate safe climbing
Teach skills to reduce parent dependency-shoe-tying
Have a grandparent's morning tea
Have free-time play so that there is time to complete tasks and activity
Step out of your own comfort zone
Be spontaneous
Bring in and use older brothers
Dads choose and read stories
Create a wall of male photos
Copy profile books to separated dads

Group or Collective time

Bring boys to the front
Don't keep them too long on the mat
Give choices-continuing, activity, eating, timing,

~\s
 -

Boys in Pre-school Education

By Warwick Pudney 2007
Have kinesthetic times in mat time
Do whole body exercises-Giant swimming, mouse to a volcano, walking and rolling
inside a giant bubble, climbing to the moon.
Have a wrestling mat. See wrestling games
Have men in for specific purposes- doing male art [flowers not allowed]
Get a man to play exuberantly with children outside and then come in and settle and read
to them
Make life-size models of men esp. famous like allblacks, wrestlers, singers by stuffing
clothes or papier-mache, then let them talk and climb on them
Design special projects for boys
Help boys problem solve
Get a man in to take drama
Provide carpentry
Get the father with the interesting vehicle to visit-fire truck, truck, tow truck
Photos of dads on-the wall
Photos of dad's work, on the wall
Talk to the boys more
Go outside and join in with the boys
Be more scientific and factual
Have a dad teach basic rugby
Have rough and tumbles, boy to boy, father to boys
Use flour to outline a sports pitch
Have old adult sports equip for imaginative play
Have tool activities, sets of bolts and nuts and allen keys
Teach how to think safety rather than stop risk-taking. Layout your pre-school to not lose
balls
Talk emotions
Encourage boys in role plays and puppets
Scavenge old appliances and mechanical equipment for boy demolition
Don't put boys down subtly
Don't put boys' things and activities down.
Give boys responsibility
Give boys a problem solving role that is good for all. Model mediation
Use dramatisation of stories
DO things then follow them through
Everyone dress up as males
Boys can dress up as females
Have a Dad come to teach haka
Have fake mikes and tennis racquet guitars
Have dad shave in front of the kids
Use the Feeling Books by Learning Media
 -

Have old motors around

Have trades people in during sessions and let boys watch
Have trades men in and have them demonstrate their skills
Vary thinking styles in activities
Give clear simple instructions
Acknowledge power and hierarchy through giving responsibility and jobs
Make up a directory of child expertise
Give visiting dads jobs to do
Have the verandah as a halfway place to encourage movement between the two areas
Do tree planting-digging, planting
Match dads with no-dad kids on outings and trips

By Warwick Pudney 2007

 -
Ideas For Early-Childhood Boy General
Give responsibility
Activities and Male Culture Channel energy
Start a boy game
By Warwick Pudney 2007 Ask what game are you playing
Use direct language
Walks
Male activities Follow their interests
Balls Get involved
Punch-bag
Running rockets Engaging involving fathers
Physical action Welcome and make them feel
Male dress ups comfortable
Throwing Introduce them to each other
Dinosaurs Direct to jobs
Fierce animals Access grandfathers
Invite male guests Have a pizza and beer evening
Ensure tradesmen visit during hours Have dad photos on the wall
Get the fish-tank man to do the aquarium E-mail dad lists
Have a family board
Reading Have father read a story
Reduce expectation Have child ask father to read
Develop pre-literacy skills Value fathers
Take literacy to them in their play Find out dad's work and do a feature on it
Write in the sand
Materials
Get their interest topics Fighting and aggression
Factual material Positive management rather than
Colour elimination
Humour Set rules
Risk Set consequences
Adventure Create a safe place to go
Conflict Role model by older kids
Fear and scariness Ask why create a reason for their actions
Building skills Have crying lessons
Make models Staff all need to understand the need for
Make books aggression and robust behaviour
Verbal communication
Talk to them while they are doing
something
One word questions
 -
Building a secure and ordered environment
for boys in your school and classrooms.' .

Boys need to know:

,

1. What the rules are

2. Who is in charge

3. What the consequences are of

breaking the rules

4. Will they be treated fairly

How can you make this happen better?

1 .
.. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. ......
2 ' .
. .. ..
3 .
.. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. ,. ..
4 .
.. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. ..

C: Warwick- Boys in school

 ,. __
..

Strategies for improving Boys achievement in

schools

1. Clarity on order and secure environment in class and

school
• Clarity of rules
• Consistency of rules

2. Increase father involvement

• In communication and reporting
• In teaching
• In attendance at school events
• In special father events

3. Make learning styles appropriate'

• Teaching processes
• Teaching content

4. Increase affmnation of boys and their way of doing things

• Increase general affirmation and male affirmation
• Acknowledge male thinking and energy

5.' Encourage male models and mentors

• Get male teachers
• Use males in the community- mentoring, coaching,
developing aspiration

C: Warwick- Boys in school

-
 -

MORE TI-'\l N~ s
"-
To vo WenA
 -
Il'
[00 ffi "f l A Programme
I @Ii @ ~ for all Fathers
S"ESSION'4]) HANDOUT .

•n Why fathers are important

,'
With the demands
we seem to have forgotten
of a 'work' culture,
why fathers
the scrutiny of feminism,
are important,
consumerism,
in fact whether
and the distant work place,
they have any use at all.
Here are some reasons collected from literature, experiences, research and workshops.

II • Children
important
and others put importance
part of establishing identity.
on real fathers as those whoare blood or genetic. This is an

•
I]
•

•
Fathers

hating self:
Fathers
are responsible

need to touch
for building positive self esteem
a man. Failure to do this makes the child and adult vulnerable
For sons affirmation by father is critical for a solid positive

children in affirming and nonsexual

in sons and daughters

male identity.

ways.
that originates
to not feeling good when with
Hating father may end in

For both sons and daughters

from
men.

sex and

•
affe.ction may become confused if they do not. This develops greater personal" love and respect for
their bodies and a sense of being loveable by men.
• The father may develop a sense of adventure and confidence in the non domestic world.
•

•I
The father appears to have an Important connection with the outdoors and wild places.
• The father's positive presence and guidance imparts a sense of internal structure, discipline and rigor.
Concentration and focus may become difficult in a world that lacks balance and boundary.
• For dauqhters it is important in teen years to leam how to relate to a man in a safe, confident. affirming
and boundary-settmq manner. Loving approvalfrom a father may prevent dependence and vulnerability
in male relationships. _
• For a son it prevents dependence on, and use of. women for approval, identity, companionship and
support.

I •
•
For both boys and girls, love and dependency
Fathers represent greater
become confused without
safety from an adverse world and build a sense of safety
a father.,
and purpose in the

n •
child.
Fathers
Fathers
have a sense of risk-takinq
play and explore physical
and excitement
space.

II •
•
Fathers teach things about the world,
Fathers have a powerful
women.
opportunity
especially
to demonstrate
in the realm of the rational
a respectful,
and in spatial relationships.
loving and equal relationshlp with a

I • Children want to be loved by their fathers.

father to direct their own strength.
Sonsparticulariy need the qutdance and the strength of the

• Fathers protect when needed

II •
•
Fathers
Fathers
bring a physical
support mothers
strength, rigour and discipline,

• Fathers give confidence that things can be fixed.

,
I •
•
•

•
Fathers

generation
Whatever
affirm risk-taklnq
Kids treat fathers
Fathers,
different.
as the most influential
for the benefit
and physical achievement.

model of men in a child's life, have the opportunity

of our society
a father does - it is important
and the planet that we live on.
that a child' experiences a man doing it.
to change the next

I
Readers may want to debate whether the above is merely environmental, a role, or an essential difference.
What remains however is that. that is how it is at the moment, and that's what it means in many peoples'
lives. Some tasks are done equally well by women but it is good to have two parents doing them. All of the
above have the power to be used for great good.

I Although as fathers w"e all fall short in many ways the challenge is to do it well.

W. Pudney

] THE NATIONAL NETWORK OF STO?P1NG V10LENCE SERVICESJ5t3l

© Hey Dad! 1997 T:;: KuPENGA WHAKAOTI MAHI PATUNGA~
 -
HE?Y Da<;i!
" Please remember, what I really need from you is:

A father who shows he loves me with actions and words

A father who make me feel I belong and I'm wanted
A father who play and has fun with me
A father who shows me how to be a good adult
A father who" disciplines to help me learn, not to control me
A father who helps me learn about limits and how far I can go
A father who listens to what I say and knows what I can't say
A father who tries to find out what's going wrong
A father who tells me what's going on
A father who talks to me about his childhood and life
A father who looks after me when I'm sick or sad
. A father who treats me fairly, and knows that I will mistakes as I try
things out

A father who keeps telling me how great I am

"
A father who respects my mother
A father and mother to provide food, housing, clothing and education
A father who tells me the truth
A father who keeps me safe and secure.at all times without hurt or abuse
A father who keeps his word
A father who doesn't hit me
A father who make the effort to be my father

Hey Dad! 1997