LearnEnglishProfessionals

EMOTIONALINTELLIGENCEAUDIOSCRIPT

ListentoanextractfromalecturebyaProfessorataBusinessSchool.
Optionalexercise ListenanddecidewhetherthesestatementsareTrueorFalse:(Answersbelow)

1. ItsbettertosayImunhappythanthissituationisgettingonmynerves.
2. Thoughtsandfeelingsarenotthesamethingandweexpressthemdifferently.
3. Ifwefeelangrybecauseofsomebodysbehaviourweshouldsayyouaremakingmeangry.
4. Weshouldalwaysthinkabouthowotherpeoplemightfeel.
5. Ourownfeelingsshouldbemoreimportantthanthefeelingsofothers.
6. Itisimportanttothinkinapositiveway.
7. Weshouldnotconcernourselveswithmakingotherpeoplefeelbetter.
8. Ifpeopledonttakeyouseriously,trytalkingtothemandtrytomakethemunderstandyourfeelings.

Nowletstakealookatsomewaysinwhichwecanincreasethelevelsofourownemotionalintelligencesothat
employerswillbefightingoverus! [laughter]

Thefirststepistolabelourownfeelingsratherthanlabellingsituationsorotherpeople. Weshouldsaythings
likeIfeelangryinsteadofthisisaridiculoussituation.

Secondly,itisveryimportanttoknowthedifferencebetweenathoughtandafeeling.Intermsoflanguagewe
expressthoughtsbysayingIfeellikeorIfeelas ifbutforfeelingswesayIfeelandthenafeelingword,an
adjectivehappy,angry,frustrated.

Nextandthisisacrucialpointweshouldtakemoreresponsibilityforourfeelings.Insteadofsayingyouare
makingmejealousweoughttosayIfeeljealous.

Afterthisweneedtolearnhowtouseourfeelingstohelpusmakedecisions.AskyourselvesHowwillIfeelifI
dothis?orHowwillIfeelifIdont?

Anotherimportantissuehereisrespect.Wehavetorespectthefeelingsofothers.Weshouldaskourselves
questionslikeHowwillthispersonfeelifIdothis?

Andofcourseitisntenoughtojustrespectthefeelingsofothers.Wehavetoshowothersthatwecare.Wedo
thisthroughempathyandunderstanding.Andweshouldacceptpeoplesfeelings.Theyareasjustasvalidas
ourown.

Thenwecometoenergy.Weneedtoturnangerintoenergyanduseittotakeactionproductiveactionthatit.

Finally,aftergettingusedtounderstandingandanalysingouremotions,weshouldpractisegettingapositive
valuefromthem.AskyourselvesHowdoIfeelandwhatcouldhelpmefeelbetter?anddontforgetthose
aroundyouhowdoyoufeel?andwhatwouldhelpyoufeelbetter?

TosumupIamgoingtoleaveyouwithtwopiecesofadvice.

Dontcriticize,advise,controlorlectureothers.Justlistenwithempathyandinanonjudgementalway.

Andwhataboutpeoplewhoinvalidateyou?Easyavoidthem.Andwhenitisntpossibletoavoidthem
altogether,trytospendlesstimewiththemanddontletthemgettoyou.

FollowthisadviceandIamsurethatyouwillsoonincreaseyourEQlevel.Youwillfeelhappierandmore
positiveandhopefullythiswillruboffonthosearoundyou.

Answers
1T,2T,3F,4T,5F,6T,7F,8F www.britishcouncil.org/professionals.htm
TheBritishCouncil,2007

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