THE WANGS

S4E5

"Just a Prank"

Harry Jonathan Chong

12/29/2016

Harry, Emily, and Emma start a prank video channel online.

Hilarity does not ensue.
EXT. 90 KERRY CRES - DAY

Establishing shot.

INT. 90 KERRY CRES, LIVING ROOM - DAY

HARRY excitedly comes running down the stairs, and he enters

the living room, where CHANG, MINDY, EMILY, and CRAIG are
seated.

Harry stands in the way of the TV. He is shaking.

HARRY
Dad! Daaaaaaaaaaad!

CHANG
(annoyed)
Can I help you?

HARRY
Did you hear the news?

CHANG
Yep, Canada has finally been
declared the 51st state of America.

CRAIG
What? Really?

MINDY
No. That hasnt happened.

EMILY
Are you sure?
HARRY
Guys. I dont care about that. The
New Nintendo Switch is coming out.

CHANG
Who?

HARRY
The New Nintendo Switch. Its
Nintendos new new console. You can
play it on your TV, or carry it
around. Its a two in one device.
Its, its a goddamned revolution
in gaming!
 2.

MINDY
Harry, if you want money for a new
Nintendo, why dont you think about
finding a part-time job?

HARRY
A job? Jobs are for suckers.

CHANG
I have a job.

HARRY
Do you now?

Craig snaps his fingers.

CRAIG
I know! If you dont wanna work,
why dont you become a prostitute?

MINDY
(shakes head)
No son of mine is going to become a
prostitute.

CHANG
(cringing)
Oh, God. I just had a mental
picture in my head. I think Im
gonna throw up.

Chang throws up.

EMILY
Dont worry, Harry. Youll think of
something.

EXT. BLOCKBUSTER - DAY

Harry, going down the sidewalk, stops in front of

Blockbuster, and sees a Help Wanted sign. He looks at it,
and goes inside.

INT. BLOCKBUSTER - DAY (CONTINUOUS)

Harry enters the Blockbuster. He looks around, and sees that

the place looks like a total ghost town.

HARRY
Hello? Is anyone here? I saw a
help wanted sign outside.
 3.

A BLOCKBUSTER EMPLOYEE, who looks worse for wear, comes out

of nowhere, and grabs Harry by the shirt, and joggles him.

BLOCKBUSTER EMPLOYEE
You have to help us! Help us fix
Blockbuster! Its a husk of its
former self! Why arent people
renting physical videos anymore?!

HARRY
Well, uh, renting physical video is
kind of inconvenient.

The Blockbuster Employee loosens his grip on Harry.

BLOCKBUSTER EMPLOYEE
How so?

HARRY
Its a lot of things to do. You
have to go to the store, select a
movie, take it home, and then
return, lest you get late fees.

BLOCKBUSTER EMPLOYEE
Yes, but what can we do to get
customers back in our stores?

HARRY
Ummm... Have more sex appeal? Sex
sells, right?

BLOCKBUSTER EMPLOYEE
Yes. Thats a good idea.
The Blockbuster Employee takes off his shirt. Fat, and pasty
white, he squeezes his man-boobs together.

BLOCKBUSTER EMPLOYEE (CONTD)

How about this? Is this sexy
enough?

Harrys feeling uncomfortable. He puts out his hands, and

takes a step back.

HARRY
Excuse me. I have to be going now.

EXT. BLOCKBUSTER - DAY

Harry backs out of the Blockbuster, and leaves. Doing so, he

bumps into EMMA, whos walking down the sidewalk.
 4.

Harry turns around, and they see each other.

EMMA
Harry?

HARRY
Emma? Whatre you doing here? Come
to rent DVDs?

EMMA
Whats a DVD?
(shakes head)
No. Im going to the bank to cash a
check.

HARRY
A check? Oooh, you have a job now,
eh?

EMMA
Not exactly...

HARRY
Whats that mean? OH, GOD! Youve
become a stripper, havent you!?
Youre a whore! Youre a goddamned
whore now, Emma! Whyyy?!

EMMA
Harry. Im not a stripper. Im not
whore, and Im not an actress
either. I just post videos online
about makeup.

HARRY
Sooo, how does that make you money?

EMMA
I think advertising -- or magic. I
have no idea.

HARRY
(thinking)
Hmmm, maybe I should make my own
videos.

INT. 90 KERRY CRES, LIVING ROOM - DAY

Head down, Harry is on a couch CRYING his eyes out.

Then Chang enters the living room, and notices whats going
on. He goes over to his son.
 5.

CHANG
Harry? Harry, are you okay? What
happened?

HARRY
I made a video, and put it up
online, and it got three views --
but there were ten comments about
me being a fat, smelly lardo. How
is that possible?!

CHANG
What was your video about?

HARRY
E-economics.

Chang sits beside Harry.

CHANG
Aw, see thats your problem: People
dont wanna be educated. They wanna
be entertained. If you want people
to watch your videos, and like
them, yah need to dumb it down,
son. A lot.

HARRY
You really think thatll help?

CHANG
Not being cynical here, but most
people are...stupid. Theyre
stupid, fucking, stupid idiots. But
theres a lot of them, and thats
why you gotta make content that
appeals to them. Appealing to the
bottom is the real key to success.

Chang puts a hand on Harrys shoulder.

CHANG (CONTD)
Cmon. Theres no need to cry
anymore. Youll get back on your
feet as soon as you think of an
idea that appeals to morons. What
do you think appeals to morons?

EXT. HIGH SCHOOL #90456, HALLWAY - DAY

Harry is standing in front of Emma, who is holding a video

camera.
 6.

HARRY
Alright, here we go! The first
video for Prank Shak 3000! Shak
spelled with just a k because I
couldnt get the name I wanted.

EMMA
Its okay. Misspelling the word
will allow us to get a registered
trademark.

At this moment EMILY comes by, and notices Harry, and Emma.

EMILY
Hey, whatre you guys up to?

HARRY
Making prank videos for a prank
video channel.

EMILY
Why?

HARRY
Because prank videos appeal to
stupid people, and most people are
stupid, so therefore appealing to
them will get us the most amount of
views.

EMILY
Most people are stupid? That sounds
like something an asshole would
say.
HARRY
Dad told me that.

There is an awkward silence, but then --

EMILY
Eh, hes probably right.

Emily leaves, skipping off without a care.

Harry, and Emma now go back to filming.

Harry speaks into the camera that Emmas holding.

HARRY
Alright, bitches! Where were we?
Its time to do our very first
prank!
 7.

Harry gets out a piece of paper from his pocket, and unfolds
it. Its a sign that says Kick Me.

HARRY (CONTD)
This is going to be off the hook.
Are you ready, Emma?

EMMA
Yah, sort of.

HARRY
Alright now! Its show time! Show
time, ladies, and gentlemen!

Harry lowers his sign, and leans against a locker, trying to

look casual. He waits in the hallway, and then a really LARGE
KID appears.

As the Large Kid is walking through the hallway, Harry looks

at him with a grin.

Emma, meanwhile, is silently shaking her head no.

Harry sneaks up behind the Large Kid, anyway, and places the
Kick Me sign on his back.

The Large Kid stops immediately. He grabs the sign off his
back, and after looking at it for a moment, crumples it up,
and tosses it aside.

He then turns around to face Harry, who seems surprised that

hes been caught.

Without saying anything, the Large Kid picks up Harry, and,

holding him upside down, starts carrying him away.
HARRY (CONTD)
Hey, what do you think youre
doing? Unhand me, you Grape Ape!

The Large Kid drops Harry into a garbage can, and walks off.

Harrys legs, pointed to the ceiling, motion as Emma with her

camera comes in for a close-up shot.

EMMA
Awww, man, that was an amazing
prank, Harry.

No response.

EMMA (CONTD)
Harry?
 8.

EXT. EMMAS HOUSE - DAY

This is Emmas house. Nice looking but somehow sorta plain.

INT. EMMAS HOUSE, EMMAS ROOM - DAY

Emma, and Harry are sitting by a desk, in front of a

COMPUTER, looking at their prank video, where they put the
Kick Me sign on the Large Kids back.

HARRY
Refresh it.

Emma clicks the refresh button on the web browser, and the
page reloads.

The video only has two views.

EMMA
(looking)
Nope. Its still the same.

HARRY
(also looking)
Aw, Jesus. Two views only? This is
even worse than before!

EMMA
Hey, at least no one called you fat
this time. Right?

Harry scrolls down the page, and looks at the comments

section.
A new comment pops up, and says: UR a fatty fatty boom
boom!! L0L!!1

HARRY
Oh, great, a comment. It says Im a
fatty fatty boom boom. I dont
even know what that is!

Harry slams his fists down onto the desk. An open bottle of
water falls down, and spills.

Then suddenly EMILY appears, face between Harry, and Emma.

EMILY
Hey, guys! Whats up?

Surprised, Harry, and Emma jump back a bit. They both go

Ugh! but quickly settle down.
 9.

HARRY
Emily? What the fuck? How did you
get in here?

EMILY
Through the window.

EMMA
But my windows not open.

At this moment we see a broken window.

Then we focus back on Emily, Emma, and Harry.

Emily puts her hands around Emma, and Harry.

EMILY
Listen, you guys. I like this prank
videos things, but youre not
getting any views because your
ideas are retarded. You need to
do something different.

EMMA
Like what?

EMILY
Make the pranks more extreme.
Remember in the 1990s, when they
had all that extreme stuff?
(gesturing)
Extreme donuts. Extreme nachos.
Extreme, uh, diarrhea. You get the
picture.
HARRY
This extreme diarrhea thing
interests me. What exactly makes it
extreme?

Emily whispers something into Harrys ear.

HARRY (CONTD)
Oh, oh, oh, oh, God. What? Why
would anyone do that?

EMMA
Hey, tell me, too. I wanna know.

Harry whispers into Emmas ear. Emmas eyes go wide.

EMMA (CONTD)
No. No way, man. No way!
 10.

Emma runs off to a waste basket, and throws up into it.

Harry, and Emily, who are of course watching, look at each

other like, Huh?

But then Emily shrugs. She dont care.

PRANK MONTAGE

Harry, Emma, and Emily together start making new prank

videos.

1. A YOUNG GIRL is in a BATHROOM combing her wet hair. She

picks up the hair dryer on the counter, and pointing it to
herself, presses the on button.

A cloud of flour comes out, and it covers her whole face,

making her white. Right after, the shower curtain behind
opens up. Emma, whos acting as cameraman, is with Emily, and
Harry in the bathtub. The Young Girl turns her head, and sees
them laughing, and pointing. She starts to sob.

2. An oiled up BUFF DUDE is lounging below a TERRACE,

catching some rays. Then a load of ice, and water falls down
onto him. Shocked, he looks up, and sees Emma on the terrace
above filming. Harry, and Emily are there too, holding a
large, now empty bucket. They throw their heads back,
laughing it up.

3. A BOY opens his eyes, and sees a blue sky, and clouds. He
sits up suddenly, and looks around, finding himself in bed,
floating, and drifting in the middle of a LAKE. Scared, he
trembles, and pulls up his blanket.
By the shore, Emma, Emily, and Harry are filming this
prank. Once again, they are in hysterics, laughing
uncontrollably.

4. Chang, Mindy, and Craig return home, and enter their

LIVING ROOM. Chang runs into the middle of the living room in
a panic, seeing that all the furniture is missing.

Wheres all the furniture?! he says.

Then Emma, Emily, and Harry come out with their camera. Harry
grins, and points up. Everyone looks up, and sees that all
the furniture is fixed to the ceiling.

What the fuck?! says Chang.

Emma, Emily, and Harry laugh at his reaction. Mindy, and

Craig, meanwhile, are a little more reticent. Mindy has her
arms folded.
 11.

5. An OLD MAN waits for an ELEVATOR. The elevator doors open.

As he is about to step in a scary clown, which is Harry,
jumps out holding a knife. He goes, Boo!

The Old Man clutches his chest, and passes out, and falls
down to the floor.

Harry seems concerned at first. He bends at the waist, and

looks down at the Old Man carefully. He stands up straight,
and then slowly turns his head, and looks at Emma, whos
behind the camera, and Emily whos assisting.

They seem rather disturbed -- but then Harry rips off his
mask, and does two hang-ten gestures, and sticks out his
tongue, with a wide smile. He seems rather pleased, maybe too
pleased, with the outcome.

Yeah! Eeee! Woooo!

6. CHANG is duct-taped to the ceiling of his BEDROOM. Hes

struggling, and yelling, trying to break free. Emma, Harry,
and Emily are below filming this, having a chuckle.

Ill kill you! Ill kill you all! Chang screams. I swear!
Im not kidding!

Still, laughter.

7. We find ourselves outside a RETIREMENT HOME.

Inside, Emily, and Emma are filming the hallway of this

retirement home.

A moment after, Harry, dressed as DEATH, wielding a scythe,

is chasing a group of OLD PEOPLE. Terrified, they run through
the hallway. Or at least try to.

8. Emily, and Emma are in the cinema, filming in the back.

Harry, dressed as a terrorist, appears in front of the movie
screen holding up a brown box.

Hes shouting something about, Allahu akbar!

Everyone sits up. Harry throws the brown box. It lands in the
middle of the audience. They all get out their seats, and run
for the exits.

When the cinema is empty, Emily retrieves the brown box, and
opens it up. A bunch of fake, spring-loaded, snakes come out.
Like those ones you find in a can of nuts.

9. Emma, and Emily are filming Harry. Harry goes up to a

HOUSE, and attaches a fog machine to the fresh air inlet.
 12.

He goes shhhh! and then turns it on, and steps back, and
watches in anticipation.

The house starts filling with fog, and the fog seeps out,
making it look like the place is on fire, spewing smoke.

The next moment, a window on the second floor opens up, and a
FATHER WITH HIS BABY looks outside in a panic. He reluctantly
jumps, and lands below on the grass, on his back.

Hes unconscious, though his baby is fine. The baby crawls

onto its fathers face, and sits there, and sucks on its
pacifier like nothings wrong.

Focus in on Harry. He pumps his fist like, Yes! It worked!

10. We see Harry, Emily, and Emma on an OVERPASS, staring

below. As Emma is recording, with her cam, Harry, and Emily
get out a life-size dummy, and throw it down.

The dummy falls onto the windshield of a car. The car brakes,
and causes a huge traffic ACCIDENT. A real pile-up, there are
seemingly dozens of wrecked vehicles.

Harry, Emily, and Emma roar with laughter.

11. Emma, Emily, and Harry are outside a bank. Emily, and
Harry put on some masks, and then the three charge inside.

Emma films Harry, and Emily, who run over to a counter, and
take out guns that they point at a TELLER. Emily shouts,
Gimme all the money you got, bitch!

The Teller, whos shaking, gives them a bag of money with a

dollar sign on it. Harry takes the bag of cash, and then he,
Emma, and Emily run out the bank as a blaring alarm goes off.

EXT. EMMAS HOUSE - DAY

Were back at Emmas house.

INT. EMMAS HOUSE, EMMAS ROOM - DAY

Harry, Emily, and Emma are looking at a computer, reviewing

their online VIDEO CHANNEL called Prank Shak 3000.

They look at the VIDEO PAGE for their video titled Scary
Clown Prank. They look at the numbers. They have 5 million
plus views, and over 1 million subscribers.
 13.

HARRY
Ho-lee crap! This video has 5
million views!

EMILY
Were gonna be rolling in that
Pewdie money!

EMMA
So, wait, what are you guys gonna
do with your share of the money?

HARRY
Im gonna buy an expensive car that
goes vroom-vroom!

EMMA
What about the New Nintendo Switch?

HARRY
The what?

EMMA
The New Nintendo Switch! Its the
reason we did all these prank
videos!

HARRY
Oh, I dont care about that. Im
rich. Im rich, bitch. I can do
whatever I want. Thats how the
world works, Emma. When you get
rich, you can shit all over anyone
below you. And, man, I am going to
spread my cheeks sooo wide --
EMMA
Hold on.

Emma takes out a calculator, and punches in some numbers.

EMMA (CONTD)
According to the numbers, were not
really rich.

HARRY
What do you mean?

EMMA
5 million views gets us $5,000. And
we have to split it between the
three of us. We havent even made
six figures yet.
 14.

EMILY
Youre right, Emma. To get rich, we
really need to boost our amount of
subscribers. We need to do one,
really, big ass prank.

EMMA
Uhhh, alright, but dont make it
too crazy. I didnt like it when we
robbed that bank.

HARRY
Emma. We didnt rob that bank. It
was just a prank.

EMMA
How was that a prank?

HARRY
Fake guns equals a prank.

EMMA
But you never returned the money.

EMILY
Were going to return it. Not to
the bank, but to society.

EMMA
How are you going to return it to
society?

EMILY
(ominous tone)
You will see, Emma... You will see.
EMMA
Thats what Im afraid of.

EXT. CITY STREET - DAY

Harry, who has one hand behind his back, and Emily, whos
holding a camera, approach a homeless guy named KRAMINGUS.

HARRY
Hello! How do you do?

KRAMINGUS
Whas that?

HARRY
We have something to give to you.
 15.

KRAMINGUS
Is it booze?

HARRY
No, its better than booze. You can
exchange it for booze.

KRAMINGUS
What is this sorcery you speak of?

Harry removes his hand from behind his back, and shows the
bag of money stolen from the bank.

HARRY
Its money!

KRAMINGUS
Wow! Money! I love money!

Harry tries give the money to Kramingus, but Kramingus puts

out his hand like, STOP. He stares Emily.

KRAMINGUS (CONTD)
Wait, is that a vidja camera?

EMILY
Yes, and whats the problem?

KRAMINGUS
Ooh! Youre only giving me money
because you wanna make yourselves
look good. Yah, throw a little
change at a bum, and then reap all
the rewards, huh?
(points)
You two are scum! Nothing but scum!

HARRY
Sooo, you dont want the money?

KRAMINGUS
Im not picky.

Kramingus grabs the bag of money. He opens it up, and looks

inside.

KRAMINGUS (CONTD)
Holy fuck-weed! How much moneys in
here?! A million dollars? Is it a
million dollars?!

HARRY
No, but its a million pennies.
Thats not too bad, is it?
 16.

KRAMINGUS
Thank you so much for your
generosity. Am gonna take this
money, and help out the world.

EMILY
Really?

KRAMINGUS
Kramingus dont lie!

EMILY
Um, your name is Kramingus?

Kramingus stands up.

KRAMINGUS
I must share my fortune! Its only
right!

He grabs a bunch of money from his money bag, and throws it

up into the air.

The cash floats in the wind, and accidentally sticks to the

windshield of a truck.

The truck tries to brake, but it slams into the back of a

bus, and crashes.

Upon impact the truck flips, and it lands on its backside

right by Harry, Emily, and Kramingus.

The back doors to the truck burst open, and let loose a bunch
of metal barrels.
Harry, Emily, and Kramingus dive out of the way to avoid
getting hit by these barrels.

Soon, however, all the barrels settle down, and the three get
up, back to their feet. They seem a bit stunned, but not
worse for wear.

EMILY
Whoa, that was close.

KRAMINGUS
Not gonna lie. I shat myself.

HARRY
Yeah, me --

Harry notices one of the barrels. Its a barrel full of pigs

blood. So says the label.
 17.

HARRY (CONTD)
Wait a minute. Is this...

EMILY
Is this what?

HARRY
Pigs blood!

Excited, Harry claps.

EMILY
Whys it matter that its pigs
blood?

HARRY
I have a really awesome idea for a
prank.

At this moment, we hear the voice of the injured TRUCK

DRIVER.

TRUCK DRIVER (O.S.)

Will someone help me?! Im badly
hurt! Call emergency services! I
feel like Im losing consciousness!

HARRY
(to Truck Driver)
Hey, hey! Quiet down! Were talking
here!
(back to Emily)
Ugh, some people have no manners.

Harry shakes his head, whilst Emily looks worried.

EXT. HIGH SCHOOL #90456 - NIGHT

Its night time at Harry, and Emilys school. But the school
lights are on.

There are some cars parked at the front; prom is taking

place.

INT. HIGH SCHOOL #90456, HALLWAY - NIGHT

Harry, Emily, and Emma, all dressed up, very classy, yet
modest, are taking time walking down a hallway.

EMILY
Harry.
 18.

HARRY
Yesss, Emily?

EMILY
I dont think we should go through
with this prank. I dont think its
a good idea.

HARRY
What do you know about pranks?

Harry points to himself with his thumb.

HARRY (CONTD)
Im the prankmeister!

EMMA
Seriously? Youre calling yourself
the prankmeister now?

HARRY
Im just saying, I know my shit.
All the shit that Ive seen, its
very well known to me.

EMILY
I dunno about this.

HARRY
Emily, relax. Whats gotten into
you? Do I need to slap a bitch?!

Emily stops walking, as do Harry, and Emma. Emily grabs

Harry, putting her hands on his shoulders.
EMILY
Harry. This fame, and money has
gone straight to your fat head. You
have to pull it back a little.

HARRY
The prankmeister does not pull it
back -- or out, or to the side, or
wherever you think it should go. I
take my ideas, and run with it,
like Usain Bolt on crack. And if
you know whats good for you,
youll stick with me...
(points)
...and well become rich, and rule
the world!
 19.

EMILY
I dont care for ruling the
world...right now.

HARRY
But what about being rich?

Harry steps back from Emily, and does a little twirl with his
arms out. He then pauses in his pose, looking like the
Redeemer.

HARRY (CONTD)
Dont you two want to be rich?!?

EMMA
Well, being rich would be nice.
Yeah, of course.

HARRY
Then lets do this! LETS GO!

Harry claps his hands. He spins around, and starting jogging

off. He punches the air.

HARRY (CONTD)
ITS THE PRANK SHAK 3000!

Harry jumps up, and clicks his heels -- but falls to the
floor. He gets up, anyway, and keeps on going.

HARRY (CONTD)
Yeeeeeeeeeeawww! Im so excited,

INT. HIGH SCHOOL #90456, GYM - NIGHT

PROM is taking place in the schools gym.

On the stage in front of a mic is Principal DIKSHIT.

Everyones gathered around.

In the crowd we see theres: Harry, Emily, and Emma, with her
camera, and Mister POPADOF, Miss BEA, TEEN WULF, Reverend
BOVILLE, Mindy, Chang, and Craig.

Dikshit is holding a fancy envelope.

DIKSHIT
And the Prom King, and Queen are...

He opens the envelope, and reads off two names.

 20.

DIKSHIT (CONTD)
Sherry McGee, and Mike Hunt.

Everyone claps.

DIKSHIT (CONTD)
WAIT.
(thinking)
Mike Hunt... Mike Hunt... Why does
that sound so -- ?! MIKE HUNT! MIKE
HUNT! It sounds like MY CUNT! Oooh,
thats funny.

Dikshit clears his throat. Ahem!

DIKSHIT (CONTD)
Anyway, since thats obviously a
fake name. Would Sherry McGee
please come up on stage?

SHERRY McGee, a girl in a wheelchair, appears on stage, and

takes center spot.

We notice that Sherry McGee has a computer attached to her

wheelchair, and a keypad, and artificial voice box that
allows her to speak.

DIKSHIT (CONTD)
(to Sherry)
Congratulation, Sherry. You are
this years new Prom Queen.

Dikshit is handed a crown, and he takes this, and places it

on Sherrys head. She smiles.
DIKSHIT (CONTD)
Sherry, do you have anything to
say?

Dikshit lowers the mic, so that Sherry can use it. Sherry
starts typing on her keypad to speak.

SHERRY
(through computer)
Thank you, everyone. I am honored,
and privileged to be here. I
usually dont get emotional, but
this means so very much to me.

In the crowd we look at Harry, Emily, and Emma. Emily turns

her head to Harry, and whispers.
 21.

EMILY
Harry, we dont have to go through
with this prank, you know.

Harry takes out something that looks like a box with a red
button on top. He shows it to Emily.

HARRY
(whispering)
Emily, push the button. Every
button push you do we get a million
views.

Emily nervously bites her fingernails.

We return our gaze to Sherry, who continues speaking.

SHERRY
This is the happiest day of my
life. I love you all. Youve
touched my heart. I will never
forget this --

We hear the sound of a CLICK.

Then a bucket balanced on the truss above the stage tips, due
to a mechanical device, and releases a flood of pigs blood
that drops down onto Sherry.

Sherry is mortified, being soaked from head to toe.

BUT HARRY STARTS LAUGHING.

HARRY
Ah-ha-ha-haaa!
He runs onto the stage, and points at Sherry. Excited, he
does a little jump.

HARRY (CONTD)
You just go pranked, bitch!

Harry poses for the camera, which Emma is holding, and throws
up two peace signs.

HARRY (CONTD)
Ye! Ye! Prank Shak 3000, yall!

The people around dont really care much for his antics. They
look shocked, and dour.

Yet Harry starts dancing. He does a little jig, stomping in

the pool of pigs blood. Its awkward.
 22.

EXT. METROPOLIS STREET - DAY

Harry, Emily, and Emma are sitting in a a fancy, red

convertible.

Harry is behind the wheel while they wait at a red light.

HARRY
Aah, I love being rich. Its
amazing. Its the most amazing
feeling in the world. Everything,
you guys, everything is amazing.

EMILY
But how did you get a drivers
license? Youre not even the right
age.

HARRY
Emily. Im rich. I need a drives
license.

EMMA
Then how did you learn to drive?

HARRY
Mario Kart.

EMMA
As long as we dont encounter any
blue shells, we should be fine.

Harry taps the steering wheel of his car, waiting for the
light to change.
And then he squints, seeing something ahead in the distance.
It looks like a dump truck -- a dump truck that is a cross
between a dump truck, and a shark.

HARRY
What the hell is that?

Emily, and Emma look as well.

The DUMP TRUCK SHARK is speeding, headed straight for them.

HARRY (CONTD)
Whoa, shiiit!

Harry puts his convertible into reverse.

The DUMP TRUCK SHARK follows, and the two vehicles get into a
chase situation.
 23.

While looking back, Harry keeps his car steady, but the Dump
Truck Shark gets closer, and closer, and closer.

Then it opens its mouth, and swallows Harrys convertible

whole.

Harry, Emily, and Emma disappear.

The Dump Truck Shark burps, and continues down the road.

INT. DANK ROOM - DAY

Harrys eyes slowly open. He looks up, and sees a grimy

ceiling, with flickering lights.

He sits up, and looks about, and slowly turns his head. He
sees Emma, and Emily, whore also sitting on the floor,
staring back at him.

Everyone here it seems is locked in place, having their legs

shackled to thick, industrial pipes.

EMMA
Harry, thank God; youre awake.

HARRY
What the eff is this?!

EMILY
We dont know. We woke up, and here
we are.

EMMA
I guess the person behind this is
the owner of that sharky dump
truck.

HARRY
I dont understand. Why would
anyone do this? The fuck?

Emma points to a briefcase in the middle of the floor.

EMMA
Hey, whats that?

Harry tries to get up, but his short chains snap, and pull
him down.

HARRY
Damn it!
 24.

Harry crawls instead, and then just barely reaches the

briefcase. He grabs it, and takes it back to Emily, and Emma.

They all look, and Harry opens it up. Inside is a HACKSAW,

and a portable tape player. Harry picks up the TAPE PLAYER.

HARRY (CONTD)
The hell is this?

EMILY
Its a tape player. I think it
plays music, and stuff. Press the
play button. It should be the one
with the arrow.

So, Harry presses the play button on the TAPE PLAYER.

There is a voice. Its deep, and scary -- but in reality is

really Sherry, who has modified her regular voice to sound
different.

SHERRY (V.O.)
(tape player, modified
voice)
Hello. You must be wondering what
this is. Well, think of it as a
challenge. Do you have the courage
to save your own lives, and saw off
your legs to acquire freedom? Only
you can know the answer to that.
Good luck. Your fate is in your own
hands. Mwah-ha-ha-ha-haaaa!

The tape player stops.

HARRY
Well, Im not gonna saw off my leg.
Fuck that.

Harry throws it.

Not a second after the doors to the Dank Room open. A small
clown, an animatronic puppet, riding tricycle comes in, and
faces everyone.

The CLOWN PUPPET grins.

CLOWN PUPPET
Good evening, friends. Might I add
that there is a time limit to this
challenge?
 25.

EMILY
(cupping mouth)
Boo! You fucking ass clown!

CLOWN PUPPET
If you do not saw yourself free,
poisonous gas will be released into
this chamber. But heres the fun
part, only one of you needs to get
free.

The Clown Puppet points to a switch outside the doors, where

there is a switch.

CLOWN PUPPET (CONTD)

All you must to do is flip this
switch, and everyone is saved. The
poison gas will be turned off. But
the real question is: Who will do
it?

The Clown Puppet turns around, and leaves. The doors behind
close.

Harry, Emily, and Emma look at one another.

EMMA
Sooo, this is awkward.

EMILY
Dddd!

HARRY
Emma, Im not going to let you make
this sacrifice. Ill do it myself.
After all, they dont call me
Hardcore Harry for no reason.

EMILY
Who calls you Hardcore Harry?

HARRY
Quiet now! I need to concentrate.

Harry picks up the hacksaw, and stares at it. He takes the

hacksaw, and starts sawing at the bottom of his shackled leg.

HARRY (CONTD)
(screaming)
Aaaaaaaaagh! Aaaaaaaaaaaaaagh! Its
so painful! Aaaaaaaaaaagh! Aaaaagh!

Emma, and Emily look horrified.

 26.

HARRY (CONTD)
Aaaagh! Oooh! Jesus! Jesus Christ!
I can see a light! Lord, Lord help
me! Give me the strength!

Harry continues sawing off his leg. Hes making good

progress.

HARRY (CONTD)
Oooooh! Eeeeeeeee! Eaaaagh!
Waaaaah! Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!
Aaaaaaaaaaagh! Aaaaaaaaaaaagh!

Finally, Harry cuts off the bottom of his leg, but due to all
the blood loss, he passes out.

EMMA
HARRY!

At this moment, the doors to this dank room open again, but
this time its Sherry, Chang, Mindy, and Craig.

They come in with a high energy. Chang points, and smiles.

CHANG
HA! You just got pranked!

Emily, and Emma look at Chang, eyes wide, and watery.

The mood of Sherry, Chang, Mindy, and Craig change. They

realize, and see whats happened to Harry.

MINDY
Uh-oh. I think we made a boo boo.

EXT. DANK WAREHOUSE - DAY

EMTs load Harry into an ambulance, and take him away.

Meanwhile, Sherry, Chang, Mindy, Craig, Emily, and Emma stay

behind to have a talk.

MINDY
Were really sorry about what
happened.

CHANG
We were just trying to teach you
all a lesson about pranks. Sure,
theyre fun to do, but being the
butt of the joke -- not so great,
huh?
 27.

EMILY
Dad, you made your own son saw off
his leg.

CRAIG
Emily, dont make things up. It was
well below the knee, so it just
counts as his foot.

CHANG
Thank you, Craig.

EMMA
Oh, it, it was disgusting! I threw
up in my mouth, and did that weird
thing, where you swallow it for
some reason, instead of spitting it
out.

MINDY
Ew, yuck

CHANG
Listen. We made a mistake. Were
sorry, but at least everyone here
learned an important lesson.

SHERRY
Pranking people, and humiliating
them is a dick move. Also: Karma!
Karma-fucking-shawarma!

CHANG
Uhh, yes. Something like that.
Emily folds her arms, and sighs.

EMILY
Can we go home now?

EXT. BUDGET FUNERAL HOME - DAY

Establishing shot.

INT. BUDGET FUNERAL HOME - DAY

Sherry, Chang, Mindy, Craig, and Emily are looking at Harry,

whos resting in a coffin. Is he really dead?

MINDY
Poor Harry.
 28.

CRAIG
Who wouldve thought you could die
from massive blood loss?

EMILY
Hey, isnt this Harrys second
funeral?

SHERRY
I dont know. I dont care.

Chang gets closer to the coffin, and stares down at Harry.

CHANG
Harry. Words can never describe how
sorry I am. I hope youre in heaven
right now enjoying yourself.

Chang sheds a single tear, then Harry, who isnt really dead
suddenly opens his eyes.

Harry sits up, and Chang, whos in shock, moves back.

CHANG (CONTD)
Harry?!?

Harry slaps Changs face.

HARRY
You just got pranked! WORLD STAR --
I mean, Prank Shak 3000, yall!

Harry hops out his coffin, and runs away like an idiot.

HARRY (CONTD)
Whoooop, whoop, whoop, whoop,
whoop, whoop, whoop!

Chang looking really, really pissed off, makes a fist, and

then chases after Harry.

At this point, we notice Emma is here, and filming all of

this with her camera.

CHANG
Get back here, boy!

Chang shakes his fist at Harry.

CHANG (CONTD)
Im gonna kill you! I swear to God!
Theyll throw me in prison for
murder!
 29.

HARRY
Hoo-ha! You cant kill what you
cant catch!

Harry, and Chang exit the viewing room.

Meanwhile, Sherry, Mindy, Craig, Emily, and Emma, who have

witnessed these antics, have stayed behind.

We focus on Sherry, Mindy, Craig, and Emily, where theres an

awkward silence.

But then Sherry says something via her computer.

SHERRY
Ha. Ha. Ha.

Craig slow claps, but the look on his face says hes not sure
if he should.

EXT. 90 KERRY CRES - DAY

Establishing shot.

INT. 90 KERRY CRES, LIVING ROOM - DAY

Harry is sitting in the living room, by himself, playing the

New Nintendo Switch.

Hes playing a game that kinda looks like Super Mario Bros.

His character is running through level 8-1, and jumping over

various obstacles, and bad guys.
He gets to a part where he has to make a carefully timed
jump.

Theres a small, narrow piece of land, with two chasms on

either end.

Harry concentrates, and begins running with his character,

and as he is about to make the jump, Chang comes out from
nowhere, and smacks Harry in the face, and runs off.

Harrys character falls into the chasm.

On his last life, the screen goes black, and says: Game
over.

HARRY
Aw, fuck -- I cant believe youve
done this!
 30.

Harry drops his controller, and puts his face into his hands,
and silently sobs.

Then we hear the voice of Mindy.

MINDY (V.O.)
And so marked the end of the prank
wars. But life from then on was
never the same. In the back of
Harrys mind there was always the
threat of a prank, and whenever he
would gather around the breakfast
table to eat his spoon would shake
uncontrollably. As a consequence
his sister Emily nicknamed him:
Michael H. Fox.

Craig chimes in.

CRAIG (V.O.)
L-O-L! Michael H. Fox!

FADE OUT.