I Nyaman Ary Wirya Candra

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2C
Draft
1. One of my habits is playing online games usually on smartphones
2. Playing online games is very fun, especially on smathpone
3. Even though it is very fun but without realizing I am addicted
4. Playing online games on a smartphone that is done on a smart phone excessively makes
my health disrupted like red eyes, headaches, body stiffness because it rarely moves and
the impact that I feel most is my memory decreases
5. Of course, all of these effects made my health and activities disturbed
6. I tried several ways to reduce my addiction so that my health would not be disturbed
7. First, I make a target when I should play games and when I don't have to
8. Secondly when I play the game I reduce the brightness of my smartphone so my eyes
don't get tired quickly
9. Third, I reduce the time I play online games, which usually change from 4 to 5 hours to
15 minutes so that the body is not stiff.
10. The last thing I changed was the way I looked at the game where the game was just for
entertainment not to make me become addicted and to damage my health
11. playing games is a fun activity but if done excessively it certainly will have a negative
impact on my health.
 Re-Organize
1. One of my habits is playing online games usually on smartphones (Topic sentence )
2. Even though it is very fun but without realizing I am addicted
3. Playing online games on a smartphone that is done on a smart phone excessively makes
my health disrupted like red eyes, headaches, body stiffness because it rarely moves and
the impact that I feel most is my memory decreases
4. Of course, all of these effects made my health and activities disturbed
5. I tried several ways to reduce my addiction so that my health would not be disturbed
6. First, I make a target when I should play games and when I don't have to
7. Second, when I play the game I reduce the brightness of my smartphone so my eyes don't
get tired quickly
8. Third, I reduce the time I play online games, which usually change from 4 to 5 hours to
15 minutes so that the body is not stiff.
9. The last thing I changed was the way I looked at the game where the game was just for
entertainment not to make me become addicted and to damage my health
10. playing games is a fun activity but if done excessively it certainly will have a negative
impact on my health.