Rationale

This written task is about The Things They Carried written by Tim O’Brien.

I have decided to write the suicide note from Norman Bowker in the form of a missing chapter
because in the story it is mentioned that there is no suicide note. However, Norman Bowker’s mom
wrote: “and I don’t suppose he wanted to bother anybody”. I thought this is contradicting that he did
not leave a suicide note and that he did not want to bother anybody as if Norman Bowker is
criticising or blaming someone or his death which is now hidden by Norman Bowker’s mom by hiding
the suicide note.

The missing chapter is written from the perspective of Tim O’Brien telling the story since we ‘had to
trust’ Tim O’Brien’s words that Norman Bowker’s mom had written that there was no suicide note
and the fact that maybe Tim O’Brien does not want to let others feel bad because of what is in the
suicide note of Norman Bowker where Norman Bowker might be criticizing his friends which went
with him to the Nam War. The missing chapter is, therefore, writing in Tim O’Brien’s writing style
except for quotations of Norman Bowker’s suicide note. Because it is written in Tim O’Brien’s writing
style, the target audience is the same as for the book.

The intended purpose of writing the missing chapter is to, at least for me, fill in an open gap. I am not
a fan of open endings, so I like to fill the open gap in for myself.

Like mentioned, this chapter is written in the style as Tim O’Brien writes. This means: some swearing,
‘speaking’ to the reader in detail, and using many enumerations.

Word count: 284

 The morning after
Well fucking shit. This really hurts me from the inside, like being crushed by the weight of the
world. Another mate gone, fuck this. Norman Bowker, huh? Yes, I remember. A quiet person but sure
a very kind guy. Gosh, I remember him as a good guy. He did not want to do anything bad, did he? I
feel really bad for him while I was reading, in bed, with a night lamp, a cup of hot mint tea in my
usual mock, a warm blanket, on a nice, clear sky, winters day. -7 degrees Celsius, it seriously was
fucking freezing outside. Do not mistake me; I like winters, but not when I am in a dressing gown
walking to the mailbox in my front yard. I find a letter from my good friend Norman Bowker. Always
interesting and fun to see mail from my friends in Nam. I went back to my bed to read the letter
while I had made myself breakfast. I open the letter only to find that this is not Norman Bowker’s
handwriting. It was Norman Bowker’s mother. How strange that she writes me a letter but fine, we’ll
go with it.

The letter started with:

August 1978
Dear Tim O’Brien
Don’t be surprised, I am Norman Bowker’s mom. I have bad news for you. I have no idea when
Norman Bowker has spoken to you for the last time, but I think he was going insane. He, of course,
was retired. Instead of doing golf, spending more time with friends and families, travelling to new
places and doing activities, Norman Bowker drove this pick-up truck around the lake. Way too many
times to count. Well, here is a copy what Norman Bowker wrote to us for the last time in his life.
Norman was a quiet boy, and I don’t suppose he wanted to bother anybody. Sorry for the loss of his
life.

Hey y’all,
I am sorry, I am so fucking sorry. I know, I really fucked up. This Nam shit was really not cool. I mean,
every day when I go to bed, and I am going to lock my door, the clicking sound is like a gun is being
loaded. I cannot handle it anymore. Man, if the guns were not there, Kiowa also would not have
drowned in a shit field. All my bad. Goddamn, I am almost sure that the adrenaline would have given
me enough energy to pull him out. It keeps coming back. I tried to keep brave and innocent during
and after the war. But facts are facts. At least, it is a fact for me that I could have saved Kiowa and
the fact that it is just my own stupid mistake that I did not do what I had to do. I tried to not put all
the blame on myself, but why the fuck was I the only one really trying to save Kiowa? Why were you
(other soldiers/mates) not trying? Somebody of you – (cough) surely not a medic or squad leader –
not pulling? And sorry to say Tim, but what an idiot are you. You should have put Kiowa shit field
event in your story. You cannot just simply ignore such a big failure! I really wanted to embarrass you
all for not helping, but I did not because I have manners. Fucking retards. Cannot believe I was doing
the same bullshit like you. I mean, seriously. We have ‘greeted’ the dead… Are you all nuts? Yes, I did
it too. Maybe it was our only ‘escape’ but surely not appropriate. This is just a last message I want to
say to you cocksuckers. By the way, all those things we took to think of our girlfriends, were just
stupid. Not a good distraction. We really got detracted, and sometimes in a bad way. Sorry mom, I
have lost all my manners in Vietnam. Sorry that I tried to look brave. Sorry that I did not come back
with a medal of ‘winning’ the war. Sorry sorry sorry. I do not want to kill myself, but I cannot live in
my lost memory. I should have done activities, like Tim, who writes stories. I hope you are not mad at
me, but just see this as a learning moment, affirmative?

Cheers all,
Norman Bowker
P.S. anyone wanting my Chevy? It does have a deviation in the steering.

So, Norman Bowker is dead. I guess we all want to blame someone for the need that we
needed to be brave and have a lot of courage. I know. Fucked up. Fuck Jorgenson, I could have been
dead. Luckily, I did not. I wonder what has happened to Azar. I had the guilt to kill our newbie medic
because if it were up to Azar, Jorgenson would not have returned home alive. After all, stories did
really save me.