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ACADEMIC SKILLS 1

Ms. Jaya Pillai


Ms. Malini Nair
McGraw-Hill Create™ Review Copy for Instructor Pillai. Not for distribution.

Course ACADEMIC SKILLS 1


Jaya Pillai
Malini Nair

http://create.mheducation.com

Copyright 2017 by McGraw-Hill Education. All rights


reserved. Printed in the United States of America. Except as
permitted under the United States Copyright Act of 1976, no part
of this publication may be reproduced or distributed in any form
or by any means, or stored in a database or retrieval system,
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This McGraw-Hill Create text may include materials submitted to


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The instructor is solely responsible for the editorial content of such
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ISBN-10: 1307002900 ISBN-13: 9781307002904


CONTENTS
Chapter 1
Subject-Verb Agreement ……………………………………………. 1

Chapter 2
Sentence Structures …………………………………………………. 13
Fragments
Run-Ons & Comma Splices
Parallelism

Chapter 3
Sentence Variety ……………………………………………………… 27
Simple Sentences
Compound Sentences
Complex Sentences
Compound-Complex Sentences

Chapter 4
Active and Passive Voices ………………………………………….. 37

Chapter 5
Modifiers ………………………………………………………………… 40
Misplaced Modifiers
Dangling Modifiers
Chapter 6
Introducing the Paragraph ………………………………………….. 46
What is a Paragraph?
Writing a Topic Sentence
Developing Body Paragraphs
Achieving Unity
Writing a Concluding Sentence
Organising Body Paragraphs
Achieving Coherence

Chapter 7
Description …………………………………………………………….. 69

Chapter 8
Process …………………………………………………………………. 73

Chapter 9
Cause and Effect……………………………………………….......... 77

Chapter 10
Introduction to Essay …………………………………………………. 86

Chapter 11
Introduction to Readings …………………………………………….. 101
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CHAPTER
SUBJECT-VERB AGREEMENT
1
s
A verb must agree with its subject in number. A singular subject (one person or thing) takes a
singular verb. A plural subject (more than one person or thing) takes a plural verb. Mistakes in
subject-verb agreement are sometimes made in the following situations:
1. When words come between the subject and the verb (prepositional phrases)
2. When a verb comes before the subject
3. With compound subjects
4. With indefinite pronouns

Words between Subject and Verb


Words that come between the subject and the verb do not change subject-verb agreement. In the
sentence:

The sharp fangs in the dog’s mouth look scary.

the subject (fangs) is plural, and so the verb (look) is plural. The words that come between the
subject and the verb are a prepositional phrase: in the dog’s mouth. They do not affect subject-verb
agreement.

The subject of the sentence never appears within a prepositional phrase. A prepositional phrase is
simply a group of words that begins with a preposition. Following is a list of common prepositions.

Prepositions

about before by inside over


above behind during into through
across below except like to
among beneath for of toward
around beside from off under
at between in on, onto with
To help find the subject of certain sentences, you should cross out prepositional phrases.

The lumpy salt in the shakers needs to be changed.


An old chair with broken legs has sat in our basement for years.
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Verbs before Subject


A verb agrees with its subject even when the verb comes before the subject. Words that may
precede the subject include there, here, and I questions, who, which, what, and where.

Here are some examples of sentences in which the verb appears before the subject:

There are wild dogs in our neighbourhood.


In the distance was a billow of black smoke.
Here is the newspaper.
Where are the children’s coats?

If you are unsure about the subject, ask who or what of the verb. With the first example above, you
might ask, “What are in our neighborhood?” the answer, wild dogs, is the subject.

When the prepositional phrases separate the subjects from the verbs, they have no effect on the
verbs.

Compound Subjects
Nouns connected by the conjunction and in the subject work as the plural subject and take a plural
verb.
Example:
o Alex and Murphy are coming here.
o Robin and his friends want to go on a tour.
o Apples and mangoes are my favorite fruits.

If the conjunction ‘and’ is replaced by together with/ along with/ accompanied by/ as well as, the
verb will have no effect for the later part of these expressions. The words prior to these expressions
are the subjects.

Example:
o Tom, along with his brothers is going to the city. (‘His brothers’ is not the subject of this
sentence.)
o Alex, as well as his parents, is coming to the party.
o The boys, accompanied by their teacher Mr. Robbins are planning a tour.
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When subjects are joined by either…..or, neither…..nor, not only…..but also, the verb agrees with
subject closer to the verb.

Neither the negotiator nor the union leaders want the strike to continue.

The nearer subject, leaders, is plural, and so the verb is plural.

Neither the union leaders nor the negotiator wants the strike to continue.

In this version, the nearer subject, negotiator, is singular, so the verb is singular.

Indefinite Pronouns
Some nouns are always singular and indefinite. When these nouns become the subjects, they
always take singular verbs.

Any + singular No + singular Some + sin. noun Every + sin. noun Each + sin. noun
noun noun

Anybody Nobody Somebody Everybody Each student


Anyone No one Someone Everyone
Anything Nothing Something Everything Either*
Neither*

*Note: Either and neither are singular if they are not used with or and nor.
Example:
o Everybody wants to live happily.
o Something is bothering him.
o No human being lives in that house.
o Neither of you is responsible enough to handle it.
o Each student has to submit a separate assignment.
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Always Plural
Some nouns are always plural. These nouns have two parts.

Scissors, shorts, eyeglasses, pants, thongs, jeans, trousers, etc.


Example:
o My pants are in the drawer.
o Your eyeglasses are dirty.
o These scissors are useless.

Note: If these words are preceded by the phrase a pair of, they will be regarded as singular
subjects.

Example:
o A pair of pants is needed.
o This pair of trousers is ugly.

Collective Nouns

Collective nouns are usually regarded as singular subjects.


Examples:
o The committee has decided to postpone the game.
o The family was ecstatic by the news.
o The crowd enjoys the excitement in the game.
o Twenty dollars is not a lot of money. (Here, the noun is plural, but the subject is regarded
as a collective noun.)
Note: The following phrases are also regarded as collective nouns and thus singular subjects.
Flock of birds/sheep, herd of cattle, pack of dogs/wolves, school of fish, pride of lions
Example:
o A flock of sheep always moves together.
o A pack of wolves is approaching towards the herd of cattle.
o A school of fish always hides from the big fishes.
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Relative Pronouns
(A) If a relative pronoun (WHO, WHICH, THAT, WHOSE) refers to only one, use a
singular verb.

Examples: It is the only one of the stores that has / have shoes.

This is the only one of the trees that bloom / blooms.

(B) If a relative pronoun refers to a plural noun, use a plural verb.


Example B:
Examples: She is one of the best students who attend / attends. The prepositional phrase cannot be
omitted; use the plural verb.
He is one of those persons who never grow / grows up.

Other Rules
None is a singular subject when it is used alone. When it is used with a prepositional phrase starting
with of, the subject can be both plural and singular.
None + of the + singular noun + singular verb

None + of the + plural noun + plural verb


Example:
o None of the money has been used.
o None of the teacher wants failure for students.
o None of the students want to fail.
o None of the bottles are

Note: No + plural noun takes plural verbs.


Example: no men are hungry now.
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A number of + noun is a plural subject, and it takes a plural verb. The number of + noun is a
singular subject, and it takes a singular verb.
Example:
o A number of dancers are coming to the party. (Indefinite number of dancers – plural)
o The number of dancers coming to the party is (Definite number of dancers – singular)
o A number of people prefer cricket to football.
o The number of days in this month is

If a gerund or an infinitive comes as a subject, the verb will always be singular.


Example:
o Swimming is a good exercise.
o Walking is a good habit.
o Eating healthy food makes you healthy.
o To err is human.

If the + an adjective appears as the subject of a sentence, it will be plural.


Example:
o The pious are loved by God.
o The industrious are always not successful.
o The best do not lack integrity.
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ACTIVITY 1.1
Direction: Circle the correct verb in each of the sentences below.
1. Your friend (talk-talks) too much.

2. The man with the roses (look-looks) like your brother.

3. The women in the pool (swim-swims) well.

4. Bill (drive-drives) a cab.

5. The football players (run-runs) five miles every day.

6. That red-haired woman in the fur hat (live-lives) across the street.

7. He (cook-cooks) dinner for his family.

8. The boys (walk-walks) to school every day.

9. The weather on the coast (appear-appears) to be good this weekend.

10. The center on the basketball team (bounce-bounces) the ball too high.

11. Each of the girls (look-looks) good on skis.

12. Everybody (was-were) asked to remain quiet.

13. Neither of the men (is-are) here yet.

14. (Is-Are) each of the girls ready to leave?

15. Several of the sheep (is-are) sick.

16. Some members of the faculty (is-are) present.

17. Nobody in the class (has-have) the answer.

18. Each of the girls (observe-observes) all the regulations.

19. All of the milk (is-are) gone.

20. Most of the seats (was-were) taken

21. Margo and her parents (visit-visits) each other often.

22. Either the cups or the glasses (are-is) in the dishwasher.

23. Vern and Fred (need-needs) a ride to work.

24. There (is-are) a dog, a cat, and a bird in the garage.


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25. Neither Matt nor his brothers (was-were) at the party.

26. Here into the main ring of the circus (come-comes) the trained elephants.

27. Either the workers or the boss (deliver-delivers) the merchandise.

28. The committee (work-works) hard for better schools.

29. There (is-are) many things to do before the holidays.

30. The jury (was-were) polled for their verdicts.

31. Here (is-are) the nails you need for the projects.

32. Either Joyce or Ellen (was-were) here.

33. The United States (is-are) a country of contrast.

34. A magazine and a book (was-were) lying on the floor.

35. The family (is-are) occupied with their individual problems.

36. Mumps (is-are) one of the most uncomfortable diseases.

37. One hundred dollars (is-are) not a lot of money to some people.

38. She (doesn’t-don’t) look very well today.

39. Twenty minutes (is-are) the amount of time it takes me to get home from work.

40. It (doesn’t-don’t) seem so cold today.

41. Gymnastics (is-are) easy for Angela.

42. Interesting news (is-are) what sells our paper.

43. A pound of cookies (cost-costs) about a dollar.

44. They (doesn’t-don’t) think they’ll win the game tonight.

45. He (don’t-doesn’t) speak very well.


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ACTIVITY 1.2
Directions: Write the correct verb in the blank to the left of each sentence.

1._________________ Everybody (was-were) asked to be quiet.

2._________________ In a marathon, few of the starters (finishes-finish) the race.

3._________________ Sixty days (is-are) not enough time to complete the project.

4._________________ All of the workers (is-are) receiving their bonus.

5._________________ On our street (is-are) many tall trees.

6._________________ It (don’t-doesn’t) make any difference.

7._________________ The value of cars and motorcycles (has-have) increased.

8._________________ The principal and her husband (is-are) honored guests.

9._________________ Either the pitcher or the base runners (was-were) caught napping.

10._________________ One of my friends (believe-believes) in E.S.P.

11._________________ Have you ever heard the expression, “No news (is-are) good news?”

12._________________ There (was-were) several dents in the car.

13._________________ Louise (doesn’t-don’t) want to drive that long distance.

14._________________ Either Luis or Horace (pay-pays) the bills in our house.

15._________________ A boy and a girl (were-was) here to see you.

16._________________ The box of apples (is-are) on the porch.

17._________________ Some of the job applicants (is-are) expected to pass the difficult screening

test.

18._________________ The army (is-are) conducting maneuvers in March.

19._________________ Here (come-comes) the family now.

20._________________ Neither of us (is-are) going to work.

21._________________ (Doesn’t-Don’t) they know when to quit?

22._________________ Thirty minutes (is-are) the time limit for the test.

23._________________ Measles (is-are) a disease most children experience.


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24._________________ The class (is-are) turning in their registration forms today.

25._________________ Beyond the mountains (is-are) a fertile valley.

ACTIVITY 1.3
Direction: Circle the correct verb in each of the sentences below.

1. Classifying students (is, are) a tedious job for a guidance counselor.


2. The exhibit of the artist's paintings (was, were) very interesting.
3. Mrs. Andrews, along with Mr. Stone, (do, does) volunteer work.
4. All of the salesmen, including Mr. Thomas, (was, were) at the meeting.
5. Every one of the girls (do, does) her shorthand homework.
6. Either Julia or her friends (is, are) planning to attend.
7. Both of the carpenters (is, are) planning to do the job.
8. Neither the students nor the instructor (want, wants) to miss class.
9. The women, as well as the men, (sing, sings) beautifully.
10. This summer I (am, is) working for my father.
11. Neither Michelle nor Paul (has, have) registered yet.
12. Mathematics (is, are) difficult for Sally.
13. Carving game birds (has, have) been her hobby for years.
14. Not one of the nominees (has, have) won an Oscar before.
15. (Do, Does) each of the questions count the same number of points?
16. The number of college freshmen (has, have) decreased in recent years.
17. Little Women (is, are) an endearing novel.
18. The dictator, accompanied by his generals, (was, were) to review the troops.
19. The secretary and the treasurer (was, were) asked to submit reports.
20. Everyone in the auditorium (was, were) startled by the announcement.
21. Juniors and seniors (was, were) expected to report to the gymnasium.
22. There (is, are) a briefcase, a typewriter, and a tape recorder in the office.
23. Ten dollars (was, were) too much for him to pay for a volume of poetry.
24. (Is, Are) there any questions about tomorrow's assignment?
25. Alphabetizing the files (is, are) my responsibility.
26. A typewriter and a sheet of paper (was, were) the only things on the desk.
27. (Does, Do) Coach Jasek and the players know about the special award?
28. My three week's vacation (was, were) more enjoyable than I had anticipated.
29. (Hasn't, Haven't) either of the officers submitted a written statement?
30. The news of his spectacular achievements (come, comes) as a surprise to all of us.
31. On the table (was, were) a pen, a pad of paper, and two rulers.
32. Either you or Marilyn (is, are) to be asked to preside at the meeting.
33. The team (has, have) reached a decision.
34. I (see, sees) your uncle and your cousin coming down the street.
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35. There (is, are) many opportunities for part-time employment on campus.
36. (Is, Are) algebra and chemistry required courses?
37. One of his three instructors (has, have) resigned.
38. (Do, Does) either of the coaches expect the team to win the game?
39. Neither I nor my sisters (expect, expects) to graduate in June.
40. Two teaspoons of vanilla (is, are) needed in this recipe.

ACTIVITY 1.4
The following passage contains twelve errors in subject-verb agreement. Cross out each
wrong verb, and write the correction above the error. The first correction has been added
for you as an example.

are

More and more people is considering a career in nursing. In fact, in the current economic climate,

nursing are considered the fastest-growing occupation. The nursing profession have a large range

of opportunities, geographic mobility, and job security. Nursing is one profession that will not

goes out of business. Long thought to be a woman’s career, nursing are becoming more and more

popular among men. Study after study demonstrates that men comes to the nursing profession for

the same reasons women do. They wants to care for sick and injured people, and they want

reasonable job security with good wages. Men reports also enjoying the competitive and

challenging nature of this career. As many Western nations faces a shortage of nurses, many

governments and nursing schools are actively recruiting more men as nurses. However, there is

still stereotypes and prejudice, and for some men it has not been easy to excel in the field of

nursing. Society are slowly becoming more comfortable with men as nurses, however. Although
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people may feels a little uncomfortable at the first sight of a male nurse, they usually come to trust

and respect him for his professionalism.

ACTIVITY1.4
The following passage contains errors in subject-verb agreement. Cross out each wrong verb,
and write the correction above the error.

Recess time! Reading and writing is important parts of the school day. However, games on the

playground is, too. The little kids in Teron’s class loves racing around on these scooter-boards.

The exercise and fresh air benefits their bodies and minds.

It is time to head back into class. The smiles on the kids’ faces makes Teron feel good. They

remind him of why he is a teacher. Teron grew up in a poor neighbourhood without his father

around. Drugs and crime was everywhere he looked. The teachers in his own life was very

important to him. They let him know they believed he could succeed in life. Adult support and

encouragement makes a big differences in the life of a child. Teron wants to provide that kind of

support to the children he teaches.

Boys and girls learns how to be adults from observing the grownups around them. Teron saw lots

of negative role models, such as drug dealers, as he was growing up. However, he focused on the

positive people in his life. He hopes the kids in his class does the same thing.
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CHAPTER
SENTENCE STRUCTURES
2
2.1 FRAGMENTS

Every sentence must have a subject and a verb and must express a complete thought. A word
group that lacks a subject or a verb and fails to express a complete thought is a fragment.

Fragment:

Whenever I go to school.

“Whenever,” a dependent word, cannot introduce a complete thought, so it cannot stand alone.

Correct Sentence:

Whenever I go to school, I take a bus.

The fragment introduces a complete thought.

Types of fragments:

1. Dependent-word fragment

Some word groups that begin with dependent words are fragments. When you start a sentence
with a dependent word, be careful not to create a fragment.

Dependent words

after if, even if when, whenever, although in order that where,

wherever as since whether because that, so that

before even though until who, whom, whose how

unless while whatever what,


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Example:

After I cashed my paycheck. I treated myself to dinner.

A dependent statement – one starting with a dependent word like after – cannot stand alone. It
depends on another statement to complete the thought. After I cashed my paycheck is a dependent
statement. It leaves us hanging. We expect to find out what happened after the writer cashed the
check. When a writer does not follow through and complete a thought, a fragment results. To
correct the fragment, simply follow through and complete the thought.

After I cashed my paycheck, I treated myself to dinner.

To Correct a Dependent-Word Fragment:

1. attach it to the sentence that comes after it or to the one that comes before it.

2. remove the dependent word and rewrite the sentence.

Eg. I cashed my paycheck and then treated myself to dinner.

TIPS
a. Use a comma if a dependent word group comes at the beginning of a sentence, but not generally
if it comes at the end of the sentence.

COMMA: After I cashed my paycheck, I treated myself to dinner.

NO COMMA: I won’t leave the house until I hear from you.

b. Sometimes who, that, which, or where appear not at the very start but near the start of the word
group. A fragment can result:
I drove slowly past the old brick house. The place where I grew up.

To correct the fragment, attach it to the sentence that came before.


I drove slowly past the old brick house, the place where I grew up.
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2. –ing and to Fragment

When an –ing word appears at or near the start of a word group, a fragment may result. Such
fragments often lack a subject and part of the verb.

1. Ellen walked all over the neighbourhood yesterday. Trying to find her dog Bo. Several
people claimed they had seen him only hours before.
2. We sat back to watch the movie. Not expecting anything special. To our surprise, we
clapped, cheered, and cried for the next two hours.
3. I telephoned the balloon store. It being the day before our wedding anniversary. I knew
my wife would be surprised to receive a dozen heart shaped balloons.

People sometimes write –ing fragments because they think that the subject of one sentence will
work for the next word group as well. But the subject must be in the same sentence.

How to Correct -ing Fragments

1. Attach the fragment to the sentence that comes before it or the sentence that comes after
it, whichever makes sense. Item 1 could read “Ellen walked all over the neighbourhood
yesterday trying to find her dog Bo.
2. Add a subject and change the –ing verb part to the correct form of the verb. Item 2 could
read “We didn’t expect anything special.”
3. Change being to the correct form of the verb be (am, are, is, was, were). Item 3 could
read “ It was the day before our wedding anniversary.”

How to Correct to Fragments

When to appears at or near the start of a word group, a fragments sometimes results:

At the Chinese restaurant, Tim used chopsticks. To impress his date. He spent one hour
eating a small bowl of rice.

The second word group is a fragment and can be corrected by adding it to the preceding
sentence:

At the Chinese restaurant, Tim used chopsticks to impress his date.


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3. Added-Detail Fragments

Added-detail fragments lack a subject and a verb. They often begin with one of the following
words:

also especially except

like including such as for example

Underline the one added-detail fragment in each of the following items:

1. Before a race, I eat starchy foods. Such as bread and spaghetti. The carbohydrates
provide quick energy.
2. Bob is taking a night course in auto mechanics. Also, one in plumbing. He wants to save
money on household repairs.
3. My son keeps several pets in his rooms. Including hamsters and mice.

People often write added-detail fragments for much the same reason they write -ing fragments.
They think the subject and verb in one sentence will serve for the next word group. But the
subject and verb must be in each word group.

How to Correct Added-Detail Fragments

1. Attach the fragment to the complete thought that precedes it. Item I could read “Before a
race, I eat starchy foods, such as bread and spaghetti.”
2. Add a subject and a verb to the fragment to make it a complete sentence. Item 2 could
read “Bob is taking a night course in auto mechanics. Also, he is taking one in
plumbing.”
3. Insert the fragment within the preceding sentence. Item 3 could read “My son keeps
several pets in his rooms, including hamsters and mice.”
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4. Missing-Subject Fragments

In each item below, underline the word group in which the subject is missing:

1. Alicia loved getting wedding presents. But hated writing thank-you notes.
2. Mickey has orange soda and potato chips for breakfast. Then eats more junk food,
like root beer and cookies, for lunch.

How to Correct Missing-Subject Fragments

1. Attach the fragment to the preceding sentence. Item 1 could read “Alicia loved
getting wedding presents but hated writing thank-you notes.”
2. Add a subject (which can be a pronoun standing for the subject in the preceding
sentence). Item 2 could read “Mickey has orange soda and potato chips for breakfast.
Then he eats more junk food, like root beer and cookies, for lunch.

ACTIVITY 2.1

Underline the fragments in the sentences below. Then make whatever changes are
needed to turn the fragments into sentences.

1. We both began to tire. As we passed the halfway mark of the race. But whenever I’d
hear Reggie’s footsteps behind me. I would pump my legs faster.

2. The American Southwest is home to several Native American nations. Such as the
Navajo, the Apache, and the Pueblo. The East is the land of the Huron and Iroquois.
Along with the Delaware and the Mohegan.

3. Punching all the buttons on his radio in sequence. Phil kept looking for a good song. He
was in the mood to cruise down the highway. And sing at the top of his voice.
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4. My children joke that we celebrate “Hanumas.” With our Jewish neighbours. We share
Hanukkah and Christmas activities. Including making potato pancakes at their house
and decorating our tree.

5. Pop artists gained fame in the 1950s. Reacting to the more established art forms like
expressionism, which preceded them. They portrayed common images from everyday
life. Such as Coke bottles and soup cans.

6. Our landlord often invites her tenants to dinner. And allows them to use her washer and
dryer. By doing such things. She has become known as the kindest person in our
neighbourhood.

7. The alley behind our house was flat. Except for a wide groove in the center. We used to
sail paper boats down the groove. Whenever it rained hard enough to create a “river”
there.

8. Don passed the computer school’s aptitude test. Which qualifies him for nine months of
training. Don kidded that anyone could be accepted. If he or she had $4,000.

ACTIVITY 2.2

Underline the fragments in the sentences below. Then make whatever changes are
needed to turn the fragments into sentences.

1. My cat flattens herself and tries to get out of the room. Whenever I turn on the vacuum.
Apparently, she thinks something is coming to eat her.

2. Philadelphia was originally a Quaker colony. That was founded by William Penn in
1681. By 1777, it had become the capital of the new United States.

3. Knowing she had not finished the book. Madelyn was very nervous about going to class.
She was sure the teacher was going to give a quiz.
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4. Cullen and Bryson have been friends since first grade. Graduating from high school this
year.

5. I hired a neighbor boy. To mow my lawn and weed the garden. He has been doing a
great job.

6. Mary Jane likes working at the department store. She enjoys the fringe benefits. For
example, purchasing clothes at a discounted price.

7. I love to eat “b” vegetables because they are full of vitamins. Such as broccoli, Brussel
sprouts, and beans. They also taste great.

8. Unless I start practicing more.

9. The house was overrun with cats. At least twenty of them. It was incredibly smelly and
filled with fur balls.

10. Chloe loves to collect rare pieces of pottery. Like jasperware. Her most prized piece is a
Yixing teapot that is several hundred years old.

11. Ben loves to study math and science. But refuses to study History. He says he doesn’t
want to focus on the past.

12. When we arrived in Chicago, we took a train from the airport to the center of the city.
Then walked a few blocks to our hotel. The trip was easy.

ACTIVITY 2.3

Read the paragraph below and correct each fragment.

It is very common for college students and young adults to find themselves in debt. As a
result of poor spending habits. In order to learn how to effectively manage money. Students
should be required to take economic classes. From elementary school all through high
school. Starting in elementary school, students should learn how to budget allowances.
How to save for items like toys and college, and how to run businesses like lemonade stands
or lawn mowing services. Games could be used in the classroom to allow students hands-on
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learning. As students get older. Classes could be more sophisticated. Students could learn
about different concepts. Like compound interest, opportunity costs, and trade-offs. They
could also be taught about the history of economics. How the government influences the
economy, and how and why countries trade. High school students’ courses would take
economics even further. Explaining general investing, paying for college, and planning for
retirement. Students could be required to intern at various businesses. To learn economics
from the business side. Teaching economics on all educational levels could help many
students avoid poor spending choices. And enjoy better financial situations throughout their
lives.

2.2 RUN-ONS

Run-ons are two complete thoughts that are run together with no adequate signs given to mark
the break between them. Here, run-ons refer to both comma splices and fused sentences.

What are run-ons?

A run-on consists of two complete thoughts run together without adequate punctuation to signal
a break between them. There are two types of run-ons:

1. Fused sentences have no punctuation to mark the break between the two thoughts.
The bus stopped suddenly I found myself in an old man’s lap.
We heard a noise in the garage two birds had flown in through the open window.

2. Comma splices are the most common kind of run-on. Students sense that some kind of
connection is needed between two thoughts, so they often put a comma at the dividing
point.
The bus stopped suddenly, I found myself in an old man’s lap.
We heard a noise in the garage, two birds had flown in through the open window.

But the comma alone is not sufficient. A stronger, clearer mark is needed between the two
complete thoughts.
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TIPS

People often write run-ons when the second complete thought begins with one of the following
words:

I we there now

you they this then

he, she, it that next

Be on the alert for run-ons whenever you use one of these words.

Three Ways to Correct Run-Ons

Here are four common methods of correcting a run-on:

1. Use a period and a capital letter to separate sentences:

The bus stopped suddenly. I found myself in an old man’s lap.


We heard a noise in the garage. Two birds had flown in through the open window.

2. Use a comma and a joining word (and, but, for, or, nor, so, yet):

The bus stopped suddenly, and I found myself in an old man’s lap.
We heard a noise in the garage, for two birds had flown in through the open
window.

3. Use a semicolon to connect the two complete thoughts, or a semicolon with a Transition
word:

The bus stopped suddenly; I found myself in an old man’s lap.


We heard a noise in the garage; two birds had flown in through the open window.
I tried to cash my paycheck; however, I had forgotten to bring my identification.
Athletic shoes must fit perfectly; otherwise, wearers may injure their feet.
P a g e | 22

4. Use a subordination to show that one thought in a sentence is not as important as another
thought.

When the bus stopped suddenly, I found myself in an old man’s lap.
We heard a noise in the garage because two birds had flown in through the open
window.

NOTE: Each subordinate clause begins with a dependent word.

ACTIVITY 2.4

Correct each run-on by using one of the methods discussed above.

1. The nervous system works by transmitting signals from all parts of the body to the brain then
sends return signals to various organs and muscles.

2. With a groan, Margo pried off her high heels, then she plunged her swollen feet into a bucket
of baking soda and hot water.

3. At 2 A.M. the last customer left the diner, a busboy began stacking chairs on tables for the
night.

4. Hypnosis has nothing to do with the occult. it is merely a state of deep relaxation.

5. Many young adults today live at home with their parents this allows them to save money.

6. Many politicians wanted America to remain neutral during World War II the attack on Pearl
Harbour in 1941 made that impossible.

7. Early in life, Thomas Edison suffered from deafness, he taught his wife-to-be Morse code
while he was courting her.

8. Originally, horses were too small to carry riders very far larger horses had to be bred for use in
warfare.

9. The words month, silver, purple, and orange have something in common, no other English
words rhyme with them.

10. I had heard that the Taj Mahal was one of the wonders of the world I planned a special
excursion to visit this magnificent tomb.
P a g e | 23

ACTIVITY 2.5

Correct each run-on by using one of the methods discussed above.

1. Oxygen is an odorless gas discovered independently by Joseph Priestly and Karl Scheele, it is
the third most abundant element in the universe.

2. Cockroaches adapt to any environment they have even been found living inside nuclear
reactors.

3. Today, there are only eight major planets in our solar system, for astronomers have
downgraded Pluto as a dwarf planet.

4. The bristles of the paintbrush were very stiff, soaking them in turpentine made them soft
again.

5. Ceylon was declared independent in 1948, later it became known as Sri Lanka.

6. Ecuador is in South America it is bordered by Colombia and Peru.

7. Lillian always attends every class session she hopes to get the best grade possible.

8. We were asleep in our tent two bears crept into our campsite and began searching for food.

9. The sheriff was very popular, he won reelection quite easily.

10. Yoga is my favourite form of exercise, I enjoy running and hiking.

ACTIVITY 2.6

Locate and correct the five run-ons in the passage that follows.

My worst experience of the week was going home for lunch, rather than eating at work.
My children didn’t know I was coming, they had used most of the bread. All I had to make a
sandwich with were two thin, crumpled pieces of crust. I sat there eating my tattered sandwich
and trying to relax, then the telephone rang. It was for my daughter, who was in the bathroom,
she called down to me that I should get the person’s name and number. As soon as I sat down
again, someone knocked on the door, it was a neatly dressed couple with bright eyes who wanted
to talk to me about a higher power in life. I politely got rid of them and went back to finish
lunch. I thought I would relax over my coffee, I had to break up a fight between my two young
P a g e | 24

sons about which television channel to watch. As a last bit of frustration, my daughter came
downstairs and asked me to drive her over to a friend’s house before I went back to work.

2.3 PARALLELISM

Words in a pair or series should have parallel structure. By balancing the items in a pair or a
series so that they have the same kind of structure, you will make the sentence clearer and easier
to read. Notice how the parallel sentences that follow read more smoothly than the nonparallel
ones.

NONPARALLEL (NOT BALANCED) PARALLEL (BALANCED)


My job includes checking the inventory, My job includes checking the inventory,
initialing the orders, and to call the suppliers. initialing the orders, and calling the suppliers.
(A balanced series of –ing words: checking,
initialing, calling)

The game-show contestant was told to be The game-show contestant was told to be
cheerful, charming, and with enthusiasm. cheerful, charming, and enthusiastic.
(A balanced series of descriptive words:
cheerful, charming, enthusiastic)

Grandmother likes to read mystery novels, to


Grandmother likes to read mystery novels, to do needlepoint, and to surf the Internet.
do needlepoint, and surfing the Internet. (A balanced series of to verbs: to read, to do,
to surf)

We painted the trim in the living room; a


We painted the trim in the living room; the professional put up the wallpaper.
wallpaper was put up by a professional. (Balanced verbs and word order: We
painted…..; a professional put up….)
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ACTIVITY 2.7

1. Florida is famous for its wonderful weather, theme parks that are family orientated, and great
fishing.

2. Many people share the same three intense fears: being in high places, working with numbers,
and speeches.

3. The garden boasted a line of fruit trees that were mature, several rows of vegetables, and a
large stand of rose bushes.

4. The History Channel offers many programs that are timely, well researched, and that people
find interesting.

5. To become a dancer, Lola is taking lessons, working in amateur shows, and auditioned for
professional companies.

6. Juan’s last job offered security; a better chance for advancement is offered by his new job.

7. Cell phones allow us to communicate, store important information, and they can even be used
to take photographs.

8. Because the dying woman was dignified and with courage, she won everyone’s respect.

9. The candidate for governor promised that she would cut taxes, reform public education, and
do something to rebuild roads and bridges.

10. If we’re not careful, we’ll leave the next generation polluted air, contaminated water, and
forests that are dying.

ACTIVITY 2.8

1. Langston Hughes (1902-1967) wrote plays, poetry, and he was an essayist.

2. Alex Haley’s career included writing several short stories and essays, authoring Roots, the
novel that made him famous, and he also edited The Autobiography of Malcolm X.

3. Melissa likes reading mystery novels, to listen to bluegrass, and playing golf.
P a g e | 26

4. Thomas impressed the audience because of his clear, responsible presentation and friendliness
as well.

5. Janine is very talented: she is a gourmet cook, a published poet, and she take great
photographs.

6. Studying a little every day is more effective than to cram.

7. The keys to improving grades are to take effective notes in class, to plan study time, and
preparing carefully for exams.

8. Paying college tuition and not studying is as sensible as to buy movie tickets to a movie and
not watching it.

9. The college provides three ways to earn extra money while attending school: serve as a lab
assistant, tutoring fellow students in the learning lab, and working in one of the many federally
sponsored work-study programs.

10. While waiting for the exam to start, small groups of nervous students glanced over their
notes, drank coffee, and were whispering to each other.
P a g e | 27

CHAPTER
3

This chapter will show you how to write effective and varied sentences. You’ll learn more about
two techniques― subordination and coordination ― that you can use to expand simple sentences,
making them more interesting and expressive.

Four Traditional Sentence Patterns


1. Simple sentences

The introduction to this topic points out that a sentence must contain at
least one main clause. A sentence that contains only one main clause and
no other clauses is called a simple sentence. However, a simple sentence
is not necessarily an uncomplicated or short sentence because, in addition
to its one main clause, it may also contain a variety of phrases and
modifiers.

The basic pattern for the simple sentence is subject-verb (SV). This pattern
may vary in several ways:

EXAMPLES
s v
Subject-verb (SV): The bird flew over the house.
v s
Verb-subject (VS): Over the house flew the bird.
s s v
Subject-subject-verb (SSV): The sparrow and the crow flew

over the house.


s v
Subject-verb-verb (SVV): The sparrow flew over the house and
v
turned north.

s s
Subject-subject-verb-verb (SSVV): The sparrow and the crow
v v
P a g e | 28

flew over the house and turned north.

2. Compound

Simply put, a compound sentence contains two or more main clauses but
no subordinate clauses. The basic pattern of the clauses may be expressed
subject-verb/subject-verb (SV/SV). The main clauses are always joined in
one of three ways:

1. Two main clauses may be joined by a comma and one of the seven
coordinating conjunctions (and, or, nor, but, for, so, yet).

s v s v
Betty enrolled for all of her classes via online, but Shawn was unable

to do so.

2. Two main clauses may be joined by a semicolon (;).

s v s v
Betty enrolled for all of her classes via online; Shawn was unable

to do so.

3. Two main clauses may be joined by a semicolon and a transitional word


or phrase. Such transitional words or phrases are followed by a
comma.

s v s v
Betty enrolled for all of her classes via online; however, Shawn was
unable

to do so.
P a g e | 29

3. Complex

The complex sentence has the same subject-verb pattern (SV/SV) as the
compound sentence. However, the complex sentence features only one
main clause and always contains at least one subordinate clause and
sometimes more than one. The subordinate clauses in a complex sentence
may occur at any place in the sentence.

Before a main clause:

s v s v
After he retired from the Army, Bob ran for president.

After a main clause:

s v s v
Soccer is a sport that I have played only once.

Interrupting a main clause:

s s v v
Kate’s grandfather, who fought in World War II told her about his

experiences during the war.

Before and after a main clause:

s v s v
When the pianist sat down at the piano, he played a melody
s v
that she had written recently.
P a g e | 30

Here is a list of common dependent words:

Remember:
1) A clause must contain a subject + a verb.
2) A dependent clause must begin with a signal word

*This list is not exhaustive but contains the most common signal words; you may
add words as you come across them in homework or in class work.

adverb clause – always starts with a subordinating conjunction

subordinating conjunctions:
after than while even though
although though how provided that
as unless as if in order that
because until as long as lest
before when as much as if
whenever as soon as since where
as though so that whereas even if

adjective clause – usually begins with a relative pronoun


(the pronoun is the subject of the clause)
relative pronouns:
that whoever can also start with:
which whomever where
who whose when
whom
P a g e | 31

noun clause – is a subordinate clause used as a noun; can be a subject, direct


object, predicate noun, or object of a preposition
how where however which
that whichever what who
whatever whom when whoever
whose whomever why

4. Compound-complex
The compound-complex sentence is a combination of the compound and
the complex sentence patterns. It is made up of two or more main clauses
and one or more subordinate clauses. Therefore, it must contain a
minimum of three sets of subjects and verbs (At least two main clauses and
at least one subordinate clause).

EXAMPLES
main clause sub.clause
1. [On the day-long motorbike trip, Jane ate the food] [that she
main clause
had packed,] [but Tom had forgotten to bring anything to eat.]

sub.clause main clause


2. [Although Leong was exhausted,] [he cooked dinner for his Mother]
main clause
and then [he washed the car porch.]
P a g e | 32

ACTIVITY 3.1
Label each sentence below as simple (S), compound (CP), complex (CX), or compound-complex
(CPX). You may find it necessary to place parentheses around the clauses and to label each as
independent or dependent before deciding on the type of sentence.

________1. You can enter the data, or you can interview the candidates.
________2. No one knew the man, and no one asked his name.
________3. After the officer pulled Tim over, Tim began to cry, and the officer took pity on
him.
________4. Mrs. Smith assigned twenty pages of the novel for homework.
________5. Running after the car, the dog barked until the car was out of sight.
________6. You should read the assigned novel; do not read Spark Notes!
________7. I love skiing, my brother loves snowboarding, and my sister likes snow tubing.
________8. If you do not want to join marching band, you should find another extra-curricular
activity.
________9. Do your homework!
________10. Whenever I hear classical music, I immediately get sleepy.
________11. In the middle of the night, my little sister screamed at the top of her lungs because
she had a nightmare, and I ran to comfort her.
________12. I washed and vacuumed the car.
________13. We ordered pork tenderloin for our entrée and scalloped potatoes for our side dish.
________14. We have nothing to fear but fear itself.
________15. I now understand simple, compound, and compound-complex sentences
P a g e | 33

ACTIVITY 3.2
1. What type of sentence is the following sentence?
If you don't succeed, you must try again.
a. simple
b. compound
c. complex
d. compound-complex

2. What type of sentence is the following sentence?


Shopping online, Craig bought gifts for everyone in his family.
a. simple
b. compound
c. complex
d. compound-complex

3. What type of sentence is the following sentence?


Cassandra could not go on the ski trip because she broke her leg, so she sat on the
couch and watched movies.
a. simple
b. compound
c. complex
d. compound-complex

4. What type of sentence is the following sentence?


The team went out for pizza after the game, but Zach had to go home so that he could
work on his history paper.
a. simple
b. compound
c. complex
d. compound-complex
P a g e | 34

5. What type of sentence is the following sentence?


Eve knew traffic would be bad, so she left twenty minutes early.
a. simple
b. compound
c. complex
d. compound-complex

6. What type of sentence is the following sentence?


The students cleaned up after they finished the experiment.
a. simple
b. compound
c. complex
d. compound-complex

7. What type of sentence is the following sentence?


Fatima plays the trumpet, and her sister plays the saxophone.
a. simple
b. compound
c. complex
d. compound-complex

8. What type of sentence is the following sentence?


Ben cleaned the kitchen, vacuumed the living room, and mowed the lawn before going for a
bike ride.
a. simple
b. compound
c. complex
d. compound-complex

ACTIVITY 3.3
In the spaces provided, identify the following sentence as simple or compound.
1. ______________ Captain Bush flew airplanes during World War Il.
2. ______________ He was stationed in Burma and flew planes over the mountains into
China.
3. ______________ The mountains were very high, so the flights were dangerous.
4. ______________ The mountains were the Himalayas; the pilots were called "hump"
pilots.
5. ______________ Flying over these mountains was treacherous yet exciting, too.
6. ______________ In his hut in Burma, Captain Bush befriended a mongoose.
P a g e | 35

7. ______________ The mongoose had made a nest in the roof of the hut; Captain Bush
let it stay.
8. ______________ Captain Bush's mother would send him food in packages, and would
share it with the mongoose.
9. ______________ The mongoose had a litter of babies in her nest in the hut.
10. ______________ A mongoose will kill a cobra, so the hut was safe from cobras.

ACTIVITY 3.4
In the spaces provided, identify the following sentences as simple, compound, complex, or
compound-complex.
1. ______________ According to Greek mythology, the Minotaur, which was part bull
and part man, lived deep within the labyrinth on Crete.
2. ______________ The story about the Minotaur concerns Theseus and Ariadne.
3. ______________ Each year King Minos of Crete ordered Athens to send seven boys
and seven girls, who were to be devoured by the Minotaur.
4. ______________ One year, however, the hero Theseus accompanied the children.
5. ______________ Ariadne was the daughter of Minos, and she fell in love with
Theseus.
6. ______________ Ariadne gave Theseus a ball of string to take with him into the
labyrinth of the Minotaur.
7. ______________ Theseus took the string with him, and he unraveled it as he went into
the maze.
8. ______________ He would use the string when he wanted to leave the labyrinth; then
he would follow it out to the opening.
9. ______________ Theseus followed the sound of the bellowing of the Minotaur, and
he found the beast at last.
10. ______________ When he reached the Minotaur, he killed it and led the children to
safety.
11. ______________ Writers come and go, but Shakespeare remains constantly popular.
12. ______________ As the twenty-first century begins, several movies of Shakespeare's
plays are being filmed.
13. ______________ Even a new Hamlet is in production.
14. ______________ In fact, Hamlet is an industry of its own; at any hour of any day,
somewhere Hamlet is being put on.
15. ______________ Hamlet is one of the top five most written about people in history
even though he is only a character in a play.
16. ______________ Many writers have tried to explain the popularity of Shakespeare,
but there is not just one explanation.
17. ______________ Among the reasons given are the vivid stories, the compelling
characters, and the beautiful use of the language.
P a g e | 36

18. ______________ Although there have been many great writers, not one has combined
these elements so well.
19. ______________ Even though Shakespeare borrowed almost all of his stories, he
transformed them, and they came to life in his hands.
20. ______________ Hamlet, for instance, contains as much killing and double-crossing
as a Mafia movie.
21. ______________ Macbeth has an ambitious husband-and-wife team; it could be the
story of a modern businessman clawing his way to the top.
22. ______________ The sad tale of the star-crossed lovers Romeo and Juliet is one that
has been told over and over.
23. ______________ Characters like Othello, Brutus, and King Lear have enthralled
people over the centuries.
24. ______________ Even less major characters like Iago, Falstaff, and Lady Macbeth
have captivated audiences, and actors still compete to play them.
25. ______________ Because Shakespeare's use of language is so eloquent, authors use
phrases from his works for their titles; we come across expressions
like "Something is rotten in the State of Denmark" every day.
P a g e | 37

CHAPTER

4
THE ACTIVE AND PASSIVE VOICES
The subject of a sentence usually performs the action of the verb. In such cases, the verb is in the
active voice.
 My father repaired my bicycle .
The verb in this sentence is repaired. Who performed that action? The answer is father, the
subject of the sentence. Therefore, the verb is in the active voice.
 My bicycle was repaired by my father.
The verb in this sentence is was repaired. The subject of the sentence, bicycle, did not
perform the action. It received the action; the bicycle was acted upon by my father. When the
subject of the sentence is acted upon, the verb is in the passive voice.
The Passive Voice―Form
Compare active voice and passive voice in different tenses.

Tense Active Passive= Be + Past Participle

Simple Present A committee chooses The winner is chosen by a committee


the winner

Present Continuous They are presenting an An award is being presented now


award now

Future They will pick the best movie The best movie will be picked

They are going to pick the The best movie is going to picked.

the best movie.

Simple Past John gave me the book The book was given to me by John.

Past Continuous The kids were playing football Football was being played by the kids.

Present Perfect They have chosen the movie The movie has been chosen.

Modal You can see the movie on DVD The movie can be seen on
DVD
P a g e | 38

ACTIVITY 4.1
Read the following sentences and decide if the verb is active (A) or passive (P).
1. The actress wore a beautiful gown.
2. Halle Berry presented an Oscar.
3. Halle Berry has been seen in many movies.
4. The director has been nominated many times.
5. Old movies were filmed in black and white.
6. Many actors live in California.
7. Many movies are made in Hollywood.
8. The names of the winners will be printed in tomorrow’s newspaper.
9. The actress thanked all the people who helped her win.
10. The actress was driven to the ceremony in a white limousine.
11. Hollywood was built at the beginning of the twentieth century.
12. Hollywood has become the movie capital of the U.S.
13. Mary was run over by a speeding car.
14. The men pushed the stalled car down the block to the petrol station.
15. The papers were scattered all over the floor.

ACTIVITY 4.2
Rewrite the following active sentences into their passive forms.
1. My father planted the Japanese maple tree in the front yard.
2. Our landlord’s son mows our backyard every week.
3. My sister wrecked her new car in an accident last night.
4. John deflated the tyres on his bike to store it for the winter.
5. Stuart tightened the screws on the lawn mower.
6. He wrote an entire book in less than three weeks.
7. They jogged almost ten miles last Saturday.
8. The storm damaged our roof.
9. The police have arrested the thieves.
10. They have invited him to their party.
11. We have shipped your order.
12. The girl recited the poem beautifully.
13. The guests enjoyed the party.
14. The child impressed everyone with his polite manners.
15. A girl from Chennai won the first prize.
16. The readers like the latest book of the writer.
17. They are painting the walls.
18. The mechanic has fixed the car.
19. She accepted their invitation with pleasure.
P a g e | 39

ACTIVITY4. 3
Rewrite the following sentences in the active voice, changing the wording as necessary.

1. The cat was named Leo by my mother.


2. Soccer is played by children all over the world.
3. The book report was prepared hastily by Sean.
4. Some students were pushed around by the gym teacher.
5. Shipping labels are printed quickly by the computer.
6. A nest was constructed in our mailbox by some robins.
7. The alarm clock was invented by an American.
8. The pizza restaurant was closed by the health inspector.
9. The mess was not cleaned.
10. The tea cup was broken.
11. The little girl is being scolded by her mother.
12. The homework has been completed by Betty.
13. The soldier was decorated for bravery by his commanding officer.
14. Much air pollution is caused by cars and factories.
15. Her coffin was slowly lowered into the ground by grandmother’s eight children.
16. Directions to the hotel were provided by a taxi driver.
17. The dinner table will be cleared by the children.
18. The boys were being misled by their gang leader.
19. The thief had been arrested by the time we reached the spot.
20. Have the bills been paid?
P a g e | 40

CHAPTER
CHAPTER MISPLACED AND DANGLING MODIFIERS
5
Misplaced Modifier
Misplaced modifiers are words that, because of awkward placement, do not describe
what the writer intended them to describe. A misplaced modifier can make a
sentence confusing or unintentionally funny. To avoid this, place words as close as
possible to what they describe.

Misplaced Words Correctly Placed Words

George could not drive to work in his With a broken leg, George could not
small sports car with a broken leg. drive to work in his small sports car.
(The sports car had a broken leg) (The words describing George are now
placed next to George)

He nearly brushed his teeth for twenty He brushed his teeth for nearly twenty
minutes every night. minutes every night.
(He came close to brushing his teeth (The meaning ―that he brushed his teeth
but in fact did not brush them at all?) for a long time―is now clear.)

ACTIVITY 5.1
Underline the misplaced word or words in each sentence. Then rewrite the sentence,
placing related words together and thereby making the meaning clear.
1. The patient talked about his childhood on the psychiatrist’s couch.
2. The crowd watched the tennis players with swiveling heads.
3. Vonnie put four hamburger patties on the counter, which she was cooking for dinner.
4. Steve carefully hung the new suit that he would wear to his first job interview in the
bedroom closet.
5. Annie ripped the shirt on a car door that she made in sewing class.
P a g e | 41

6. The speaker discussed the problem of crowded prisons at the college.


7. The latest Denzel Washington movie has almost opened in 2,200 theatres across the
country.
8. The newscaster spoke softly into a microphone wearing a bulletproof vest.
9. The tenants left town in a dilapidated old car owing two months’ rent.
10. The woman picked up a heavy frying pan with arthritis.

Dangling Modifier
A modifier that opens a sentence must be followed immediately by the word it is
meant to describe. Otherwise, the modifier is said to be dangling, and the sentence
takes on an unintended meaning.
Look at this example:
Dangling modifier Sitting in the dentist’s chair, the sound of the drill awakened Larry’s old
fears.

The modifier sitting in the dentist’s chair is followed by the sound of the drill. This word order suggests
that the sound of the drill was sitting in the dentist’s chair. Clearly, that is not what the author
intended. The modifier was meant to describe the word Larry. Since the word Larry is not in the
sentence (Larry’s is a different form of the word), it is not possible to correct the dangling modifier
simply by changing its position in the sentence.

Here are two common ways to correct dangling modifiers.

METHOD 1: Follow the dangling modifier with the word or words it is meant to modify.

After the dangling modifier, write the word it is meant to describe, and then revise as necessary.
Using this method, we could correct the sentence about Larry’s experience at the dentist’s office
like this:
Correct Version Sitting in the dentist’s chair, Larry found that the sound of the drill
awakened his old fears.
Now the modifier is no longer dangling. It is followed by the word it is meant to describe, Larry.
METHOD 2: Add a subject and a verb to the opening word group.

The second method of correcting a dangling modifier is to add a subject and a verb to the
opening word group and revise as necessary. We could use this method to correct the sentence
about Larry’s experience at the dentist’s office.
P a g e | 42

Dangling modifier Sitting in the dentist’s chair, the sound of the drill awakened Larry’s old
fears.
Correct Version As Larry was sitting in the dentist’s chair, the sound of the drill
awakened his old fears.
In this revision, the subject Larry and the verb was have been added to the opening word group.

ACTIVITY 5. 2
Underline the dangling modifier in each sentence and then rewrite the sentence using the
first method of correction.

1. Mortified by defeat, my opponent was congratulated by me.

2. After sleeping for ten hours, my alarm clock woke me up.

3. Reminded by a friend, my English paper was turned in late.

4. Swimming for six hours nonstop, my knees were severely injured.

5. Pleased and excited, the regional championships were won.

ACTIVITY 5.3
Underline the dangling modifier in each sentence and then rewrite the sentence using the
second method of correction.

1. While waiting for an important call, Peg’s phone began making weird noises.

2. After being shampooed, Trish was surprised by the carpet’s new look.

3. Touched by the movie, tears came to my eyes.

4. After eating one too many corn dogs, Stella’s stomach rebelled.

5. Born on the Fourth of July, Rob’s birthday cake was always red, white, and blue.
P a g e | 43

ACTIVITY 5.4
Correct any misplaced or dangling modifiers in the following sentences.

1. The bandleader told her loudly to play her tuba.


2. After she had almost driven two hundred miles, Hillary was ready to stop.
3. After jogging for two miles, my lungs began to ache.
4. Worried about the poor weather, a raincoat and an umbrella are advised.
5. Leon showed a chicken to his daughter that had two heads.
6. After searching for three weeks, the lost watch was finally found.
7. Sitting on the table, the smile disappeared from the Cheshire cat.
8. Driving madly down the road, the horse just missed being hit and killed.
9. Renata admired the butterflies on her wallpaper singing a lullaby to her baby.
10. After I drove for seven straight hours, all of the towns began to look the same.

ACTIVITY 5.5
In each sentence, underline the ONE misplaced or dangling modifier. Then rewrite each
sentence so that its intended meaning is clear.

1. The customer demanded that the waiter take her order rudely.
2. Dancing on their hind legs, the audience cheered wildly as the elephants paraded by.
3. While pitching his tent, a snake bit Tony on the ankle.
4. The apprentice watched the carpenter expertly fit the door with envious eyes.
5. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow wrote that rainbows are flowers that have died and
gone to heaven in a poem.
6. Not having had much sleep, my concentration during class was weak.
7. The people on the bus stared at the ceiling or read newspapers with tired faces.
8. I nearly napped for twenty minutes during the biology lecture.
9. Tired and exasperated, the fight we had was inevitable.
10. To impress the interviewer, punctuality is essential.
P a g e | 44

ACTIVITY 5.6
Choose the correct answer

1. Which of the following sentences contains a dangling modifier?


A. To raise a good dog, patience is useful.
B. Moving slowly, Bowie stalked the rabbits.
C. After eating the catfood, Bowie belched.
D. all of the above
E. none of the above

2. Which of the following sentences contains a dangling participial phrase?


A. Pedrito got into serious trouble missing the grammar quiz last Monday.
B. To complete the grammar quiz on time, you will have to click your heels three times.
C. When taking a grammar quiz, concentration is everything.
D. all of the above
E. none of the above

3. Which of the following sentences contains a dangling gerund phrase?


A. On completing the grammar quiz, spiking your pencil is acceptable.
B. Wearing a helmet is a sign of a healthy awareness of death.
C. When she talks to her parents, she is reminded that she is lucky that they are happy
and healthy.
D. all of the above
E. none of the above

4. Which of the following sentences contains a dangling modifier?


A. After washing my car, I waxed it.
B. After talking with our veterinarian, I felt better about the prognosis.
C. She called her boyfriend because she missed him.
D. all of the above
E. none of the above

5. Which of the following sentences contains a dangling modifier?


A. Having worked for the company for twenty years, I was surprised to learn that my
retirement benefits would not be sufficient.
B. Having taught phonology every semester for the last five years, he was eager to teach
syntax.
C. After sweating in Reavis Hall throughout the summer, I am ready for winter.
D. all of the above
E. none of the above
P a g e | 45

6. Being a first-year student, my professors do not accept Wikipedia as a credible source of


information.
A. no error
B. dangling modifier
C. misplaced modifier
D. contains both misplaced and dangling modifiers

7. Which of the following sentences has a misplaced modifier?


A. He only talks about changing his habits. [Intended meaning: He only talks but does
nothing else, like consulting a physician or psychiatrist, about changing his habits.]
B. A dog appeared in my dreams that sang like an angel.
C. The steak on the grill is hers.
D. all of the above
E. none of the above

8. Which of the following sentences is grammatically correct?


A. Only Bill wanted to go to the lake. [Intended meaning: Bill wanted to go to the lake,
but no one else did.]
B. Bill only hinted that he would help us move. [Intended meaning: Bill hinted but did
not, for example, promise that he would help us move.]
C. Bill wanted only Mary to win. [Intended meaning; Bill wanted Mary to win, but did
not want anyone else to win.
D. all of the above
E. none of the above

9. Which of the following sentences has a misplaced modifier?


A. The dog bit only the mail carrier. [Intended meaning: The dog bit the mail carrier but
didn't bite anyone else.]
B. He talked too quickly.
C. You should consider your options carefully.
D. all of the above
E. none of the above

10. Which of the following sentences has a misplaced modifier?


A. Most stress disorders can be effectively treated with serotonin-uptake inhibitors.
B. These disorders include depression, heat intolerance, onychophagia, pathologic
jealousy, dysthymia, and trichotillomania.
C. Most dictionaries will not have obscure medical terminology, although most good
dictionaries will have the Latin and Greek roots that morphologically compose the
terminology.
D. all of the above
E. none of the above
P a g e | 46

CHAPTER
INTRODUCING
INTRODUCINGTHE
THEPARAGRPAH
PARAGRAPH
6
WHAT IS A PARAGRAPH?
A paragraph is a collection of related sentences that are clearly connected to one another and that
make some point. Paragraphs come in several varieties:
1. Introductory
2. Body
3. Concluding
Although each of these “specialty” paragraphs serves its own purpose, our focus in this chapter
will be the body paragraph, developing it as a single unit of thought but remembering that
paragraphs generally work together in essays. We will practice focusing paragraphs through a
topic sentence; developing that main idea with specific, relevant support; and concluding the
paragraph forcefully.
There is no set length for a paragraph, the kind of writing and audience for it usually determining
the number of sentences. For example, newspapers favour shorter paragraphs, whereas academic
journals often produce paragraphs that fill a page. Our papers in this unit will usually run to 120-
150 words, or around 12-13 sentences.

The body paragraph has three basic parts: topic sentence, supporting details, and concluding
sentence.
Dangers in a Deli
More frequently than people realize, there are dangers in deli work. 'One concern for potential
Key: deli workers is slippery floors. If the counter is packed with anxious customers, and workers are
Topic hustling about taking care their orders, a wet floor is not going to take top priority. During the rush
sentence what's going to stop an employee from running too fast, which could result in a serious wipeout.
In addition to slippery floors, working around chemicals should not be taken lightly. When
Examples cleaning the glass, you might end up with ammonia sprayed in your eyes. Both pan degreaser and
Details sanitizer are used at dish time, and it only takes one splash in the sink to send someone on her way
to the emergency room. But the part of the job that is most dangerous is using the meat and cheese
Explanati slicer. Whether operating the slicer or simply cleaning it, you risk cutting yourself. With just one
ons careless slip near the sharp blade, you end up with one finger. A new person on the job might be a
little nervous because of the possible injury that deli work entails, but luckily, safety training is a
requirement.
P a g e | 47

WRITING A TOPIC SENTENCE


All effective paragraphs have a main point, that is, some reason for their author to put those
particular sentences together. In body paragraphs writers frequently state explicitly what the
paragraph will be about, and they often make this statement the first sentence. This is called a
topic sentence. Topic sentences focus the direction of the author’s and the reader’s mental
travel. Like a compass guiding a backpacker through unfamiliar terrain, the topic sentence can
help people find their way from one end of a paragraph to the other, without taking needless
detours along the way.
Consider the three following sentences. Which two limits the topic and makes a statement or
expresses an opinion about it that you think the author could develop in a single paragraph?
1. I have a brother named Jason.
2. Many families have more than one boy.
3. My brother Jason is a great guitarist.
Sentences 1 and 2 are simply factual observations that give the reader no sense for what else the
writer might want to say about them besides “So what?” sentence 3, on the other hand, limits the
topic(“Jason”) and makes a clear statement or assertion about it (“is a great guitarist”) that we
would expect the author to discuss further. With a clearly expressed opinion or statement combined
with a well-focused topic, we give a reader and ourselves the necessary direction to move into the
rest of the paragraph.
As you begin to write topic sentences, keep in mind several important points as indicated below:

How to Write Topic Sentence


1. Limit the topic
Remember that we are only working with paragraphs at this point, so the scope must be
fairly narrow. For example, instead of trying to take on the topic of global environmental
problems, you might discuss a personal commitment to recycling.
Sometimes writers list several parts of their topic in a forecasting statement like this: “If
people want to begin to recycle, all they need to do is call Deffenbaugh Waste Disposal,
make a bit of extra room in their garage, and be prepared to separate the ‘hard’ from the
‘soft’ trash.”

2. Make a clear statement about it.


Simply mentioning a topic does not give your reader much sense of direction. Your topic
sentence should state an opinion or controlling point. For instance, don’t say, “Many people
recycle in the United States” —a general factual statement that could lead in many
directions. Instead express a point, like this: “I learned the hard way how important it is to
recycle.”
P a g e | 48

3. Use specific word choices


Strive to make your topic sentence interesting, since it is your introduction to the rest of
your paragraph. You may begin with a rough topic sentence like “My brother is a great
guitarist,” but before you are through revising, you might end up with a more focused and
interesting sentence like this: “My brother Jason toured all last summer with Pearl Jam,
playing some terrific solo riffs.”

Activity 6.1: Recognizing the Parts of Topic Sentences


In the following group of topic sentences, underline the topic once and the controlling idea twice.
Example: My dad, Charlie Martin, had a way of making us smile in the middle of difficult
situations.

1. My best friend had a horrible experience in a pawnshop last week.

2. Hot air balloon rides are fun but more dangerous than most people think.

3. Once they are behind the wheel of their cars, some people become too aggressive.

4. More businesses ought to provide on-site care for working mothers and fathers.

5. I think cemeteries are very restful places.

Focusing Topic Sentences


Topic sentences need to fall somewhere between relatively general and relatively specific. They
must be broad enough to let the writer develop a subject with specific examples, explanations,
and details but narrow enough to allow the subject to be covered in a paragraph. Notice how the
following examples of broad topic sentences can be narrowed:
Unfocused: Most people look forward to holidays.
Workable: I always look forward to spending Thanksgiving with my relatives in Dallas.
Unfocused: Fall is the season in which nature slows down and prepared for winter.
Workable: While much of nature slows down in the fall, squirrels seem to be in perpetual
motion as they prepare for the long winter months ahead.
P a g e | 49

Activity 6.2: Focusing Topic Sentences


Revise the following topic sentences to narrow their focus. Imagine that you will have to write a
paragraph based on your revised topic sentence. Consider personalizing the sentences through your
own experiences or general knowledge and making a specific point about each topic.

Example: Having to stay in the hospital can be a miserable experience.


Revised: One of the most miserable experiences of my life was being hospitalized for knee
surgery last July.
1. Many people enjoy rock concerts

2. Education costs a great deal in this country.

3. Computers are often used by students to word process their writing assignments.

4. There are many SUVs on the road today.

5. Most people take precautions when they learn that a tornado had been sighted in their
vicinity.

Activity 6.3: Deducing Sentences


For further practice with topic sentences, read the following groups of example sentences that
would come from the body of a paragraph, write out a possible topic to match the given sentences,
and then write a suitable topic sentence on the lines provided.
Example: • Jinyi opened her first present and clapped her hands in delight.
• Her parents, brothers and sisters, and the rest of the family wished her well.
• Jinyi's mother brought the cake, with ten candles blazing, into the room.
• Her father hugged her and whispered, "You are the best daughter a father could ever
hope for."
Possible topic: Jinyi’s tenth birthday party
Possible topic sentence: Jinyi had a wonderful time on birthday.
P a g e | 50

1. • One major mistake for new college students is too much partying.
• Another problem many students have is zoning out in class.
• Whereas cramming used to cut it in high school, daily study is now required.
• It is difficult to balance schoolwork with our jobs.
Possible topic:
Possible topic sentence:

2. • I never realized that marriage would have so many bumps in the road.
• Being a good partner requires more than giving fifty-fifty.
• A couple must communicate on a daily basis.
• Another important ingredient is regularly showing your affection.
Possible topic:
Possible topic sentence:

3. • Dad told us to burn the leaves, and my older brother Jim thought gasoline would help.
• After we had the leaves raked in a big pile, Jim poured on a mayonnaise jar full of gas,
• "Go ahead and light them," he ordered me.
• When the leaves exploded, I was knocked flat on my back.
Possible topic:
Possible topic sentence:
P a g e | 51

Revising Topic Sentences


After you have selected a topic and devised a rough topic sentence, you can confidently move
ahead with the writing process. However, when polishing our work, we should review the topic
sentence to see if it is as clear, precise, and interesting as can make it. One way to improve a topic
sentence is to use specific words where possible. Selecting specific words simply means choosing
a word that fits into a more limited category than another that is similar to it. Consider the following
word lists and decide which list is more general (the larger category) and which is more specific
(the smaller category).
A
1. tool
2. plant
3. person
4. energy source
5. animal
B
6. hammer
7. rose bush
8. Thomas Jefferson
9. coal
10. horse
If you decided that column B is more specific, you can see that these words are part of a larger
group than words in column A represent. For instance, the first word, a tool, includes such things
as a screwdriver, wrench, paintbrush, shovel, and more, including a hammer. The more specific
the word we choose, the sharper the image it creates and the more interesting the sentence
becomes for a reader.
Take a look at the following topic sentences. The first one in each pair is the rough topic
sentence, and the second has been polished by adding specific words (underlined).
Rough topic sentence: My vacation didn't turn out too well.
Revised topic sentence: My vacation to Australia was a disaster.
Rough topic sentence: Our day care has had a problem recently.
Revised topic sentence: Peppermint Patty's day care has sent six children home this week with
pink eye.
Rough topic sentence: My family's table manners need some work.
Revised topic sentence: Elbows on the tables, arms stretched across plates as hands reach for the
salt shaker, brothers and sisters outshouting one another to be heard ― my family's table
manners need some work.
P a g e | 52

Activity 6.4: Polishing Topic Sentences


Rewrite the five following sentences, making them more interesting by adding specific words
where appropriate.

l. Rough topic sentence: I like working on my car.


Revised topic sentence:

2. Rough topic sentence: I didn't much care for some teachers in high school
Revised topic sentence.

3. Rough topic sentence: I know now why I am finally back in school.


Revised topic sentence:

4. Rough topic sentence: My husband has to work too much.


Revised topic sentence:

5. Rough topic sentence: Living in a new country is difficult.


Revised topic sentence:
P a g e | 53

DEVELOPING BODY PARAGRAPHS


After a writer has established a workable topic sentence, he must next move into the heart of his
paragraph, the support sentences. These sentences arc developed with examples, details, and
explanations—the simple tools of the trade. No matter how long the writing project runs, writers
use these tools over and over to -fill up the space," sometimes artfullv, sometimes not.
During the next few pages we will take a look at exactly what solid support is: what it consists
of, how much is enough, when it is relevant, and how to be sure it is clear to your reader.

Kinds of Support
Examples
An example seeks to illustrate some part of a statement showing the reader a specific instance of
it. Whenever you are asked for additional information to help someone understand an idea, chances
are that you will provide an example. For instance, you might say to a friend, "Baseball is a boring
game." Your friend, who is a baseball fanatic, immediately replies, "What do you mean by that?"
When you respond by telling her that there is not enough action, that the pitcher and the catcher
have most of the fun, that half the time the infielders and outfielders might as well be asleep for
all the moving they do, and that you would like to see a little more body contact, like in football,
you have just provided a list of examples.
Personal examples are those based on your own experiences. When you talk about how frustrating
preschoolers can be and illustrate your point with the time your four- year-old sister locked herself
in the bathroom, refusing to come out for two hours, you are using a personal example.
Examples outside your personal experience include some of the possibilities listed below.
• Facts: commonly accepted truths. Example: Some trees lose their leaves in the fall.
• Statistics: numerical facts. Example: The earth is 93,000,000 miles from the sun.
• Information gathered from print sources (books, newspapers, magazines, etc.), electronic
sources (including the Internet), interviews, TV, and radio
• Second-hand anecdotes: stories that happened to someone else
• Comparisons (including metaphor/simile): Example: The flute is basically a pipe with holes
drilled in it.
What-if? situations: speculating about what could happen (e.g. what would happen if you decided
to stop working on Fridays?)
• Dialogue created to express a point
P a g e | 54

Details
Just as we need to illustrate general statements, we need details to make examples more
interesting. Details help sharpen image or clarify an idea. To make the example of your little
sister’s locking herself in the bathroom more vivid, we could name some parts of the scene, then
add modifiers and sensory details:
My four-year-old sister slammed the hard wooden door of bathroom, and I heard the lock click
shut. Then she shrieked at me, “1 hate you!” When I tried to calm her down, she turned on both
taps of the sink full blast and began flushing the toilet to drown me out.

Explanations
Examples can develop much of our writing, but sometimes we need more. What if the reader does
not understand the example or how it relates to a point? We can offer explanations—reasons that
justify behavior, tell how things work, and anticipate possible outcomes. Explanations are vital in
developing a main point because they fill in the gaps between examples and guide readers through
our ideas.
Suppose a reader's reaction to the detailed example of the preschooler's behavior above was "That
doesn't seem so frustrating to me. Why didn't you just walk away and forget it? The writer would
need to explain that the child was his responsibility and that it would have been too dangerous to
leave her locked in a bathroom by herself, especially while she was having a tantrum.
Explanations work with details and examples to "fill up the white space.” In the following
paragraph you will find three major examples to support the topic sentence, explanation following
each major example, and details throughout to make the examples and explaining more vivid for
the reader.

Dangers in a Deli
More frequently than people realize, there are dangers in deli work. 'One concern for potential
deli workers is slippery floors. If the counter is packed with anxious customers, and workers are
hustling about taking care their orders, a wet floor is not going to take top priority. During the rush
what's going to stop an employee from running too fast, which could result in a serious wipepout.
In addition to slippery floors, working around chemicals should not be taken lightly. When
cleaning the glass, you might end up with ammonia sprayed in your eyes. Both pan degreaser and
sanitizer are used at dish time, and it only takes one splash in the sink to send someone on her way
to the emergency room. But the part of the job that is most dangerous is using the meat and cheese
slicer. Whether operating the slicer or simply cleaning it, you risk cutting yourself. With just one
careless slip near the sharp blade, you end up with one finger, A new person on the job might be
a little nervous because of the possible injury that deli work entails, but luckily safety training is a
requirement.
P a g e | 55

Sufficient Support
Knowing what kinds of support to work toward is important, but we must also —be sure when
developing paragraphs to use sufficient support. All too frequently inexperienced writers fall into
the trap of thinking a topic has been fully presented when in fact the development is thin or merely
repetitive,
You might want to think of paragraph and essay writing as following a descending level of
generality: the further you progress into the body of your work, the more specific it should become.
For each major point you raise, you will immediately begin to clarify it with examples, details, and
explanations that become increasingly specific or limited until you feel the reader should
understand your idea. Practically
Speaking, in our one-paragraph papers you will regularly be descending only one or two "levels."
Relatively general
Main point (topic sentence)

First-level example + details

Second-level example + details

Relatively specific Third-level examples + details

Read below to see what the deli paragraph from our last example sounds like once we strip away
the second-level examples, details, and explanations:
More frequently than people realize, there are dangers in deli work. One concern for potential
deli workers is slippery floors. In addition to slippery floors, working around chemicals should not
be taken lightly, but the part of the job that is most dangerous is using the meat and cheese slicer.
A new person on the job might be a little nervous because of the possible injury that deli
work entails, but luckily, safety training is a requirement.
Does this version of the deli paragraph read more like a paragraph or an outline?
The main ideas are there but nothing more.
P a g e | 56

Activity 6.5: Creating Sufficient Support


The five sentence groups below begin with topic sentences followed by a first-level example. To
further develop the topics, create a second-level example that adds more specific information
(details and explanation).
Example:
• Topic sentence: People should avoid jogging because it hurts more than helps them.
First-level example: For instance, jogging can be bad for a person's joints.
Second-level example: I have had problems with my knees, and my ankles swell if I run for
more than half an hour,

1. Topic sentence: Making it to class on time is difficult for several good reasons.
First-level example: First, students have difficulty finding a parking space.
Second-level example: ______________________

2. Topic sentence: I learned how to budget my money the hard way.


First-level example: One lesson was to stop eating out so often.
Second-level example: __________________

3. Topic sentence: My family's annual trip to Silver Dollar City was fun this year.
First-level example: I most enjoyed my time on the lake.
Second-level example: ____________

4. Topic sentence: Painting my house this spring was a valuable experience.


First-level example: Another way I profited was by saving money.
Second-level example: _________________

5. Topic sentence: Though some people hate it, I love doing yard work.
First-level example: My work outside gives me a great chance to observe nature•
Second-level example: ___________________
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Relevant Support—Achieving Unity


Even when paragraphs seem fully developed with enough major examples and secondary support,
we can sometimes be fooled. It is not uncommon, especially in a rough draft, to have included
material that may be interesting to us, accurate, and worthwhile but that still distracts the reader
from the main point. When our paragraphs contain material that does not clearly develop the topic
sentence (main point), we have a problem with unity.

Consider: If someone were writing about the advantages of mowing her yard herself, talking about
fresh air, communing with nature, exercise, and so forth, but then stopped for a moment to mention
the durability of the mower's engine, would this be a digression? Perhaps, but what if she then
included the idea of learning more about two-cycle engines and how the knowledge is useful to
her? If the author can make the connection for her reader between the material she is offering and
her main point, the paragraph is probably unified.

If you write out a controlling topic sentence and then look at it often as you work, you will limit
trouble with unity. Always consider your audience and try to gauge whether they would view any
of your material as distracting or unnecessary.

Notice in the following descriptive paragraph the shaded clause "I am relaxing" in the first (topic)
sentence. Because relaxation is supposed to be the main point of this paragraph, do you think the
underlined sentences reinforce or detract from the feeling?

What's the Rush?

It's eighty degrees on a pink-sand beach, and I am relaxing in the shade of a thatched umbrella.
The breeze blows cool from the north off the ocean, just enough to keep the temperature
comfortable. I suppose that I should count myself lucky since the weather forecast for tomorrow
is rain and high winds. From behind me I can hear the clink of bottles and glasses from the bar,
and I wonder whether or not I'm feeling too lazy to go get another drink. In a minute, I think.
What's the rush? But maybe I ought to speed it up a bit to catch the office back home before they
close. I should check the McWard portfolio this afternoon. A white seagull eyes me hopefully,
standing on the sand about ten feet away, anticipating another piece of the sandwich that I have
been sharing. Other seagulls circle overhead squabbling and attacking each other over what looks
like a piece of trash. About fifty yards down the beach, I can see a young couple ―newlyweds?
― laughing and drawing shapes in the wet sand. Beyond them the surf is gentle, breaking softly
on the flat shelf of the beach. In the distance, rocking gently in the swells, a boat heads out to sea,
its red flag with white diagonal stripe flapping. I glance down at the snorkeling gear I brought and
think maybe it's time for a little action, but then the bartender is standing by my chair, another
glass of soda and lime in hand, "Michael,” he says smiling, "how about a little refresher?" There
goes my resolve. "Thanks, I think," I tell him. As I flop back onto the lounge chair. I remind myself
that this is my vacation. There is a time for work and a time for rest, and a wise person knows
when each is right.
P a g e | 58

Activity 6.6: Determining Relevant Support


Look closely at the following paragraph and then underline any material that seems to stray too
far from the topic sentence. Then explain why each sentence that you marked seems like it does
not belong.

Primary audience: American college students ages eighteen to twenty-two.

When I was ten years old, I used to live for baseball. Summer signaled the time school was finally
over, and my friends and I could hit the park. We never wasted any time. Eight boys ranging in
age from seven to fifteen met at our house for breakfast, filled up their water bottles, and headed
down to the park. We usually had it to ourselves. Of course, there was one time when the city held
their Fourth of July celebration there. Down went the Frisbees to mark the bases, out came the
gloves, bats, and balls, and then began the all-day games. You might think that a group of kids
could not stay focused on anything all day, but we did. This was like our little World Series. Part
of it was just love of the game; part of it was the competitive spirit. We all wanted to win. My
brother was the most competitive of all of us and would fight over the strikes and the foul or fair
balls. After countless innings, balls chased into the street, and blisters from swinging the bat too
many times, we would stop for the day. I knew that later in the evening I might sneak a quick game
of basketball in with my brother in our driveway. The sun would finally set on the eight of us,
sweating, dehydrated, and covered in dirt from sliding into bases and diving for grounders.
Whoever has the most wins, it did not really matter. We went home happy, knowing that the next
day we could play baseball again.

WRITING A CONCLUDING SENTENCE


As important as it is to begin a paragraph with a clear, focused, interesting sentence, and to
substantially develop the body, writers need to end their paragraphs with equal care. Although any
short and medium-length body paragraphs in essays do not use summary or “clincher” sentences,
it is a common and useful tactic to do so with longer body paragraphs. In our one-paragraph papers
this semester, we will always end with a sentence (sometimes two might seem necessary) that
brings the paper to a full sense of completion, and we will learn several ways to do this effectively.
Working with well. shaped final sentences will also help us ultimately to create more interesting
concluding paragraphs in our essay writing.

How to Write a Concluding Sentence


1. Use a connector.
Remember to use a transitional word (finally, aside from, on the other hand, consequently, etc.)
or other sentence connector in the first part of the concluding sentence.
2. Link to the topic sentence.
Always remind your reader of the topic and the Statement you have made about it in your topic
sentence. You may simply repeat a word or phrase or, better still, find a synonym or alternate
P a g e | 59

phrase. Some paragraphs benefit from a brief mention (only a word or two) of some important
example, reason, or strong image from the Body.
3. Expand the thought.
Try to leave your reader with something to think about in addition to your topic sentence
statement. This added thought should be an extension of your discussion in the supporting
sentences of the paragraph. Any of the following methods can work:
A. Express an emotion.
B. Give a judgment or opinion.
C. Ask a related question.
D. Make a reflective statement.
E. Say how something has affected your behavior or outlook on life.
F. Make an ironic observation.

What to Avoid in Concluding Sentences


l. Do not simply repeat the topic sentence or a slightly altered version of it. Show your reader
that you have some good reason for writing the paragraph and for her to have read it.
2. In trying to find an interesting expanded thought, don’t drift off into the Twilight Zone. Your
final thought should grow logically from the paragraph.
3. Do not end with a cliché or worn phrase, for example, "So, as you can see, I was
caught between a rock and a hard place.'
4. Do not announce to your reader that you are ending the paper, for example, "Well, it is time
for me to end this paragraph, so…….." A brief summary of any important examples or points
(just a words), your expanded thought, and the fact that there are no more words on the page will
all let the reader know that you have finished.

Expanded Thought
There is no One "right" way to conclude a paragraph or essay, although there are some poor
choices. Actually, conclusions, like introductions, are often detachable parts of the larger writing
project. As you change one, you will frequently need to change the other, Take a moment to
examine the six possible concluding sentences that could end the following paragraph. Each ends
with a different final thought.
Which do you prefer?
P a g e | 60

An Oak Deeply Rooted—or a Tumbleweed?


Many people would define the ideal life as one in which a person can live where she wants to,
when she wants to. The Midwest appeals to people from all over the country who want housing
that is still affordable, a small city with lots of green spaces, and an environment that is relatively
low in crime. However, when summer comes, people head for the mountains in droves. In an ideal
situation, a couple would have a small, well-furnished cabin in a rugged mountain chain like the
Rockies and spend time there from July through September. They could spend time backpacking,
fishing the lakes and streams, rafting the rivers, horseback riding, and putting the mountain bikes
to the purpose for which they were made. However, mountain winters are rugged, so there comes
a time when what many people feel is the most desirable destination is the one to head for—the
beach, In January when the temperatures in the middle and northern part of the country are dipping
well below zero, there is a mass exodus of winter-shy crowds heading for the southern rim of our
country and beyond. And why not? Who wants to bundle up in four layers of clothes and a down
coat just to waddle outside to check the mail? Beach residents can look forward to sailing, motor
boating, jet skiing, windsurfing, fishing, snorkeling, diving, and leisurely strolling along the beach,
Aside from the gentler weather and fun activities, it seems easier to find large groups of like-
minded people of various ages to socialize with:
Possible Concluding Sentences
A. It would be fun to have the freedom and money to live wherever a person wanted to and
it is a shame that more people in this affluent country of ours cannot do it.

B. But if people want this kind of lifestyle, they need to work hard and save so they can earn
it.

C. With so many places to visit and new experiences awaiting us, who would not want to
travel the country as the seasons turn?

D. In the long run, although it would be wonderful to have the freedom and the money to
move from place to place, what probably counts more wherever people live are their attitude
and health.

E. But even with the opportunities for fun that multiple homes could bring, I think I would
miss my friends and family too much to stay away from my home home too long.

F. So if you like this vision of a future, be sure to take it easy white you're young, don't work
too hard, don't worry about an education that will lift you upward, and by all means max out
those credit cards today—you'll be living the ideal life before you know it.
As you can see from these possible conclusions, there are many "right" ways to end a paragraph.
You might try out several as you revise your drafts, searching for the one that seems best to fit
your topic, purpose, audience, and tone (humorous, serious, sad, angry, etc.).
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ACTIVITY 6.7: Selecting Concluding Sentence


In the following three sets of sentences, you will find a topic sentence and three possible
concluding sentences. Circle the letter of the one you feel makes the strongest closing sentence.
1. Topic Sentence: Whenever I close my eyes trying to remember the "good old days," the first
thing that comes to mind is my friends calling me scaredy cat.
Possible concluding sentences:
A. I have a career goal today, which l am close to achieving, of becoming a travel agent.
B. Several of my childhood friends are currently in jail.
C. Although I wouldn't want to relive these childhood experiences, they have helped me
become more sensitive to other people's fears and insecurities.

2. Topic sentence: I was fifteen years old and had never before lost a Tae Kwon DO tournament,
but this St. Louis match was a big one, and I was a little worried.
Possible concluding sentences:
A. With only five seconds left, my opponents’ parents began to cheer with tears in their eyes.
B. But losing this tournament helped me to see that there will always be someone better, so I
should never stop learning and practicing what is important to me.
C. Martial arts stay in shape if you are willing to spend the time at them.

3. Topic sentence: So, as my life in America began, I was surprised about the great difference
between Korean high school and American high school.

Possible concluding sentence:

A. Though I miss my home and friends, I am glad that I was able to experience the freedom I
found in my American high school.
B. In Korea I had no choice; there was a required academic programme that could not be
disputed by the students.
C. The way that high schools dealt with sexuality between males and females was very different
because of the different cultures.
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ORGANIZING BODY PARAGRAPHS

Paragraphs and essays benefit from an overall organizational plan, and there are several
methods that are useful, depending on what you want to accomplish.

If your primary goal is to describe, you might choose a spatial method of arrangement,
organizing the parts of your description from side to side, front to back, near to far, inside to
out, or bottom to top. If your primary goal is to tell a story, —to entertain, explain, or
persuade—you would choose a chronological pattern, relating events as they unfold in time.
If you are most interested in communicating information—telling how something works,
defining an idea, or giving some history—you might select order of importance, that is,
beginning with your least important or interesting idea and ending with the most significant.

Whatever overall method you choose, keep in mind that, especially in writing longer papers,
you will often combine methods. For instance, a persuasive essay with reasons primarily
arranged from least to most convincing might include a story that is arranged
chronologically, or the essay might need to arrange some scene spatially.

CONNECTING SENTENCES―ACHIEVING COHERENCE


As we learned earlier in this chapter under Developing Body Paragraphs, a paragraph or an essay
must be unified; that is, all the material must clearly relate to one main idea (topic or thesis
statement). If unity relates to ideas, then coherence relates to the paper’s structure, what holds
the sentences together. It might help to think of the link between cohesion and the word
adhesive, a useful sticky substance(like tape or glue) that can keep your sentences from falling
apart.
There are a number of ways to link sentences and paragraphs, and most of us use them quite
naturally even as we churn out rough drafts. However, when we miss necessary connectors,
confusion often follows. Consider the following two sets of sentences, and decide which seems
most clear to you:
A. __ I prepared for surgery ___ the vet clinic ___ I work, I was administering anesthesia to
a miniature black poodle ___ respiration stopped ___ the heart ___ beating. I quickly
scrambled ___ the side of the small poodle to start ___.

B. As I prepared for surgery at the vet clinic where I work, I was administering anesthesia
to a miniature black poodle when respiration stopped, and the heart stopped beating. I
quickly scrambled to the side of the small poodle to start respiration.
The omission of several transitional words and three repeated words in version A means that we
have difficulty even following the writer’s information, much less enjoying what he has written.
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In our won work, we want to become aware of the devices listed below, which will help our
writing “stick together”:

Methods for Achieving Coherence


1. Transitions
2. Repetition
3. Synonyms
4. Pronouns
5. Reference to main idea

Transitions
The use of transitions (also called “connectors”) is the most common technique for creating
coherence in writing. Transitional words and phrases guide a reader through our writing like
street signs help us find our way in the city.

TRANSITIONS
The use of transitions (also called connectors) is the most common technique for creating
coherence in writing. Transitional words and phrases guide a reader through our writing like
street signs help us to find our way in the city.
List of Common Transitions

For Locating or Moving in Space


(particularly useful for descriptive writing)

above east (west….) in front of over


against elsewhere inside surrounded by
alongside far off (away) into there
around farther on near through
at the side (end) forward next to to
backward from off to the right (left)
behind here (close to here) on under
below in on the other side up
beyond in the back onto upstairs
by in between opposite
down in the distance out of
For Moving in Time
(particularly useful in narrative writing)
after first (second, etc.) next suddenly
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afterward immediately now then


at last in the meantime often time passed
awhile in the past once until
before later previously when
earlier long ago recently while
finally meanwhile soon
All reference to calendar time and calendar events
ago (days, weeks, months, years)
one day (days of the week, months of the year, seasons, holidays)
that morning (afternoon, evening)
today (tonight, yesterday, tomorrow)
All references to clock time All references to regular meals
Any clock numbers used with A.M./P.M., during breakfast (brunch, lunch, dinner)
(12:00 A.M., 1:00 P.M., etc)
a few minutes (seconds, hours)
For Adding Material
(particularly useful in writing that explains how something works)
again as well as furthermore likewise
also besides in addition moreover
and further last next
For Giving Examples and Emphasis
(particularly useful in explanatory and persuasive writing)
above all especially in particular one reason
after all for example in truth specifically
another for instance it is true surely
as an example indeed most important that is
certainly in fact of course to illustrate
For Comparing
(particularly useful in writing that focuses on similarities and differences)
alike both like resembling
also in the same way likewise similarly
For Contrasting
(particularly useful in writing that focuses on similarities and differences)
after all dissimilar nevertheless though
although even though on the contrary unlike
but however on the other hand whereas
differs from in contrast otherwise yet
difference in spite of still
For Showing Cause and Effect
(particularly useful in explanatory and persuasive writing)
accordingly because hence then
and so consequently since therefore
as a result for this reason so thus
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For Summarizing and Concluding


(particularly useful at the end of the body paragraphs and at the beginning of concluding
paragraphs)
finally in conclusion in short that is
in brief in other words largely to summarize

Repetition
Repeating a word or phrase is the second most common technique for creating coherence in
writing. However, you should be careful not to repeat needlessly. There is a point where
successful coherence ends and boring repetition begins. Take a look at the following sets of
sentences and judge which uses repetitions most effectively:
A. Every summer, after school was over in Venezuela, two of my cousins used to come to my
parents’ house to spend their vacation time with us. My cousins and I did not realise at
that young age that my grandfather, who lived with us, was having hard time trying to
sleep. Kept awake every night by my cousins’ loud voices and laughter, my grandfather
decided to play a joke on my cousins and me that did not turn out to be as funny as my
grandfather thought it would be.
B. Every summer, after school was over in Venezuela, two of my cousins used to come to my
parents’ house to spend their vacation time with us. We did not realise at that young age
that my grandfather, who lived with us, was having hard time trying to sleep. Kept awake
every night by our loud voices and laughter, he decided to play a joke on us that did not
turn out to be as funny as he thought it would be.
If version A seems a bit awkward, it is because the writer has overused repetition, instead of
offering some variety as she does in version B.

Synonyms
Using synonyms (words with identical or nearly identical meaning) or short phrases in the place
of another word or phrase is a good alternative to simple repetition. For example, in the excerpt
above, the author could have created variety by naming her two cousins and using the word
children to refer to herself and her cousins.

Pronouns
Pronouns (words that stand in the place of nouns) are used by most of us so unconsciously that we
might overlook them as strong coherence devices. Whenever we use words like he, she, him, her,
them, we are using pronouns and helping to hold our sentences together. As with synonyms,
however, we must be careful not to overuse pronouns, and, to avoid confusion, we must be sure
that a pronoun clearly refers back to a specific noun.
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Read the following sets of sentences and decide which is most coherent and clear:

A. Bill’s boss told him that his office would be relocated while major renovations were
completed on their building. The rest of his staff were worried that his office relocation
would put him too far away to stay in touch with day-to-day problems. But Jim assured
everyone that his office project would be handled quickly, and he would be back on the
front line with his co-workers before they knew it.

B. Bill’s boss told him that Bill’s office would be relocated while major renovations were
completed on their building. The rest of Jim’s staff were worried that Bill’s office
relocation would put him too far away to stay in touch with day-to-day problems. But Jim
assured everyone that his office project would be handled quickly, and that Bill would be
back on the front line with his co-workers before they knew it.

If version A seems difficult to understand, you might notice the overuse of his. Pronoun reference
becomes especially tricky within a sentence or immediately preceding it there are several nouns a
pronoun could be referring to, as in the case above with Bill and Jim. A good general rule of thumb
to follow when revising for both coherence and clarity is to be suspicious of all pronouns, checking
them several times to be sure the noun that they refer back is clear to your reader.

Reference to Main Ideas


Another useful method for achieving coherence between sentences and paragraphs is by linking
main ideas or examples. For instance, notice how the following paragraph excerpt begins to
develop the idea of merciless teachers in the topic sentence, continues with the synonym cruel,
and reinforces the idea of cruelty with the word punish.

As I think back on middle school in Korea, I remember that I was afraid of the merciless
teachers who wanted me to enjoy studying by forcing it on me. One of my teachers, for moral
education, was short and fat, just like the whip he carried. “I see you have not done your homework,
Jeong,” he said. With my palms up, he began to whip my hands harshly. Somehow, the pain ended
with me crying and begging, “I will do it next time, teacher!” Another cruel man, my history
teacher, liked to use his green baby bamboo stick to punish me when I did not score more than 80
percent on his exams.
Well-connected writing relies on all five methods to achieve coherence, often using several in the
same sentence.
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ACTIVITY 6.8: Organizing Descriptions


The following place lists have descriptive details that are not arranged in any logical order.
Number the details to show a simple, one-step-at-a-time progression, beginning with 1 as
the first detail in a descriptive paragraph and progressing to 6.
Example: Topic sentence: My attic is the dirtiest place in the house. (Arrange details from
bottom to top)
2 The floorboards are covered with dust.
4 Two small windows are streaked and smeared.
6 The rafters have cobwebs hanging from them.
1 I can feel grit beneath my feet on the stairs going up.
3 Old furniture has the dust of ages accumulating on it.
5 Boxes of ancient books are piled high.

1. Topic sentence: First Watch on a busy Sunday morning is a study in efficiency.(Arrange


details from front to back.)

____ Outside the restaurant there is a host taking names for seating.
____ At the far end of the line, I can see the cooks efficiently cranking out the food.
____ In the lobby coffee and tea are set up to help with the wait.
____ At the front desk a manager greets people while checks are being orderly
processed.
____ Busboys clear, wipe, and reset tables quickly.
____ Behind the food line I can hear the dishwashers hard at work.

2. Topic sentence: The poolroom grew quite, and time seemed to slow as everyone around
the table concentrated on the last shot of the game. (Arrange details from bottom to top.)

____ The TV sets on the walls seemed to blur out, and the sound became just so much
white noise.
____ Overhead, the blades of the ceiling fans were frozen in place.
____ People stopped shuffling their feet.
____ Lucky Ed was draped over his cue―the stick, cue ball, and eight ball his whole
universe.
____ As Ed’s right hand drew the cue back, the crowd leaned forward in anticipation.
____ Bottles of Budweiser were dangling at their sides—no one dared to move before
the shot.
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Order of Importance
When you order examples by importance, beginning with the least interesting or dramatic and
progressing to the most, you tell the reader what to pay special attention to and leave her with
your stronger point, an effective way to conclude.
When you begin to arrange your primary examples, sometimes the order of importance is
obvious, but sometimes it is not. Often the author determines whether, for instance, a house
burning down is more or less significant than a much-loved pet getting sick.

ACTIVITY 6.9: Arrange by Order of Importance


The following sets of subtopics are ordered randomly. Rearrange them by putting a number in
the spaces provided, beginning with what you feel is the least important or dramatic (1) and
moving to the most (5).

1. Alexander’s vacation was a disaster.

____ The prices at Disney World were outrageous.

____ One of his suitcases was stolen.

____ He was mugged in the parking lot.

____ The weather was mostly gloomy.

____ People were rude at his hotel.

2. Some people invite accidents when they drive.

____ They drive drunk.

____ They change lanes without signaling.

____ They drive too fast in bad weather.

____ They race along residential streets with children nearby.

____ They slow down to a crawl on the highway to gawk at accidents.


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CHAPTER
7 DESCRIPTION
When you describe something or someone, you give your readers a picture in words. To make
this “word picture” as vivid and real as possible, you must observe and record specific details
that appeal to your readers’ senses (sight, hearing, taste, smell, and touch). More than any other
type of writing, a descriptive paragraph needs sharp, colourful details.
Here is a description in which only the sense of sight is used:
A rug covers the living-room floor.
In contrast, here is a description rich in sense of impressions:
A thick, reddish-brown shag rug is laid wall to wall across the living-room floor. The long,
curled fibres of the shag seem to whisper as you walk through them in your bare feet, and
when you squeeze your toes into the deep covering, the soft fibres push back at you with a
spongy resilience.
Sense impressions include sight (thick, reddish-brown shag rug, laid wall to wall; walk through
the in your bare feet; squeeze your toes into the deep covering; push back), hearing (whisper), and
touch (bare feet, soft fibres, spongy resilience). The sharp, vivid images provided by the sensory
details give us a clear picture of the rug and enable us to share the writer’s experience.
In this section, you will be asked to describe a person, place, or thing for your readers by using
words rich in sensory details. To prepare for the assignment, first read the two paragraphs ahead
and then answer the questions that follow.

Paragraphs to Consider
A Depressing Place

1The pet shop in the mall is a depressing place. 2A display window attracts passersby who stare
at the prisoners penned inside.3 In the right-hand side of the window, two puppies press their
forepaws against the glass and attempt to lick the human hands that press from the outside.4 A
cardboard barrier separates the dogs from several black-and-white kittens piled together in the
opposite end of the window.5 Inside the shop, rows of wire cages line one wall from top to
bottom. 6At first, it is hard to tell whether a bird, hamster, gerbil, cat, or dog is locked inside
each cage.7 Only an occasional movement or a clawing, shuffling sound tells visitors that living
creatures are inside. 8 Running down the center of the store is a line of large wooden perches
that look like coatracks. 9When customers pass by, the parrots and mynahs chained to these
perches flutter their clipped wings in a useless attempt to escape. 10At the end of this centre
aisle is a large plastic tub of dirty, stagnant-looking water containing a few motionless turtles.
11The shelves against the left-hand wall are packed with all kinds of pet-related items. 12The
smell inside the entire shop is an unpleasant mixture of strong chemical deodorizers, urine-
P a g e | 70

soaked newspapers, and musty sawdust. 13As so many animals are crammed together, the
normally pleasant, slightly milky smell of the puppies and kittens is sour and strong. 14The
droppings inside the uncleaned birdcages give off a dry, stinging odour.15 Visitors hurry out of
the shop, anxious to feel fresh air and sunlight. 16The animals stay on.

House for Sale!


1The wide porch encourages visitors to come into the awe-inspiring Craftsman-style home that
was built in 2012 and is filled with details and characteristics that every new homeowner should
have. 2Upon opening the front door, buyers will be greeted by a two-storey foyer that opens into
a formal dining room, featuring a boxed ceiling and hard-wood wainscoting.3 Off the dining
room is the eat-in kitchen that boasts double-ovens, professional-grade appliances, a combined
built-in buffet and wine cabinet, antiqued ceiling, and large oak table. 4The kitchen opens into
the crazy living room, which is accentuated by large French doors and a magnificent stone
fireplace. 5The master suite is also located on the main floor across from a uniquely designed
half-bath. 6Many people like having the master suite on the main level. 7Bathrooms boast high
ceilings and vibrantly warm colours that maintain the magnificence of this home. 8The highlight
of the home is the upstairs “kid zone.” 9A large playroom is the centerpiece, and the children’s
rooms all lead off this area.10 Each of the rooms has been decorated to satisfy whimsy of each
child. 11With lofts, hidden rooms, and undersea adventure murals, this child-focused area is a
masterpiece of creativity and originality. 12Not to be missed, the lower level of the house
includes a home office, bar, media room equipped a 70” television, and an additional play area
for children. 13A final unique feature of this home is the carriage house located over the
detached three-car garage and accessed through a beautifully designed breezeway, overlooking
a little fountain bubbling in the backyard. 14Boasting the same quality cabinetry and appliances
that the main home has, the carriage house’s one-bedroom apartment is a perfect getaway for
guests and a perfect complement to the home.

About Unity
1. Which sentence in the paragraph about the house should be omitted in the interest of
paragraph unity? (Write the sentence number here.)

________________

About Support
2. Label as sight, touch, hearing, or smell all the sensory details in the following sentences
taken from the two paragraphs. The first sentence is done for you as an example.

sight hearing
a. Only an occasional movement, or a clawing, shuffling sound tells visitors that living
creatures are inside.
P a g e | 71

b. Because so many animals are crammed together, the normally pleasant, slightly milky
smell of the puppies and kittens is sour and strong.

c. A final unique feature of this home is the carriage house located over the three-car garage
and accessed through a beautifully designed breezeway, overlooking a little fountain
bubbling in the backyard.

3. After which sentence in “A Depressing Place” are specific details needed? __________

About Coherence
3. The writer of “House for Sale!” organizes the details by observing the house in an orderly
fashion. Which of the house’s features is described first? ____________

Which of the house's features is described last? ____________________

Check the method of spatial organization that best describes the paragraph:

____________ Exterior to interior

____________ Near to far

____________ Top to bottom

Description Checklist: THE FOUR BASES

UNITY
 Does the topic sentence clearly state the dominant impression of the subject?
 If you left out the key words in your topic sentence (the words that state your dominant
impression), would a reader know what idea fits there?
 Does every detail support your topic sentence?

SUPPORT
 Are the details you have included specific rather than vague and general?

COHERENCE
 Have you used a logical spatial organization that helps the reader follow your
description?

SENTENCE SKILLS
 Have you used a consistent point of view throughout your paragraph?
 Have you avoided wordiness and used concise wording?
 Are the sentences varied?
 Has the paragraph been checked for spelling and other sentence skills?
BEYOND THE
CLASSROOM P a g e | 72
DESCRIPTION

Beyond the classroom, many circumstances call for descriptive writing. For example, journalists
may need to use vivid, descriptive details to give their readers a clear mental picture of an event.
For this writing assignment, you will write a descriptive paragraph with a specific purpose and
for a specific audience. You have two options.

Option 1
Imagine that you are an interior designer. A new affordable-housing complex is going to be built,
and you have been asked by the developers to create the layout for a sample studio apartment.
Write a paragraph describing your design, telling what it would include and how it would be
arranged. You might list all the relevant needs you can think of, such as storage space, appropriate
lighting, and a separate kitchen. Then put all the parts together to describe the floor plan. Use a
spatial order in your paragraph to help the developers “see” the apartment. Begin your topic
sentence with the words, “My design for the studio apartment offers….”

Option 2
Write a paragraph describing one of your favourite spots, such as a restaurant, coffee shop,
convenience shop, preschool, playground, or any public area of your choice.
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CHAPTER
8 PROCESS

Every day we perform many activities that are processes―that is, series of steps carried out in a
definite order. Many of these are processes are familiar and automatic: for example, tying
shoelaces, changing bed linen, using a vending machine, and starting a car. We are thus seldom
aware of the consequence of steps making up each activity. In other cases, such as when we are
asked for directions to a particular place, or when we try to read and follow directions for a new
game, we may be painfully conscious of the whole series of steps involved in the process.
In this section, you will be asked to write a process paragraph—one that explains clearly how to
do or make something. To prepare for this assignment, you should read the student process
paragraphs below and then respond to the questions that follow.

Paragraphs to Consider

My First Time Voting

1 I took this more seriously than anything else I had done in my life until then. 2 I read up on
the candidates and tried to see both sides of every argument. 3 l categorized how each
candidate responded to my own views, especially in terms of education, the environment, and
word affairs. 4 However, there were other preparations to think about. 5 I made sure I had
registered and that all the information on my card was accurate. 6 I also located my local
precinct weeks before, to make sure I knew how to get there on Election Day. 7 I listened to
the debates and the political analyses on television. 8 I discussed with my college professors
and peers, all the while constructing my own arguments. 9 When Election Day finally came, I
arrived at the location early. 10 Once | approached the identification table, an older woman
searched for my name and verified my identity with my driver's license. 11 Once she located
me on the roll, I was given instructions and a ballot. 12 Next, I was escorted to my booth. 13 I
took a deep breath and began reading every line carefully and punching in my selections. 14
Before I knew it, I had gone through all the questions. 15 I reviewed all of my selections one
more time before I cast my vote. 16 I've always wanted to do what was right. 17 I did very well
in school and sports, and always made my parents proud. 18 After exiting the voting booth, a
sticker was placed on my blouse. 19 It read, “I voted today.” 20 I proudly wore that sticker all
day. 21 I had voted, and no matter the outcome of the election, I truly felt like an American that
day.
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Dealing with Verbal Abuse

1 If you are living with a significant other who abuses you verbally with criticism, complaints,
and insults, you should take steps to change your situation. 2 First, realize that you are not to
blame for his or her abusive behavior. 3 This may be difficult for you to believe. 4 Years of
verbal abuse have probably convinced you that you're responsible for everything that's wrong
with your relationship. 5 But that is a lie. 6 lf your partner is verbally abusive, it is his or her
responsibility to learn why he or she chooses to deal with his problems by saying nasty things.7
Perhaps he observed his father treating his mother that same way. 8 Maybe she never learned
any more positive ways to deal with negative emotions, like anger, fear, or disappointment. 9
Steps two and three need to be done one right after the other. 10 Step two is for you to
announce that you will no longer tolerate being verbally abused.11 State that you are a person
who deserves respect and civil behavior, and that you will accept no less. 12 Next, offer to go
with your partner to talk to a counselor who will help both of you learn new ways to
communicate. 13 While he or she learns to express feelings without attacking you, you can
learn to stand up for yourself and express your feelings clearly. 14 If the significant other refuses
to take responsibility for changing his or her abusive behavior, then you must consider step
four: to leave. 15 You were not put here on earth to have your self-concept demolished by
serving as someone else's verbal punching bag.

About Unity
1. Which paragraph lacks an opening topic sentence?

_____________

2. Which two sentences in “My First Time Voting” should be eliminated in the interest of
paragraph unity? (Write the sentence numbers here.)
__________ ___________

About Support

3. Summarize the four steps in the process of dealing with verbal abuse.

a. ____________________________________________________

b. ____________________________________________________

c. ____________________________________________________

d. ____________________________________________________

About Coherence

4. Do these paragraphs use time order or emphatic order?

______________
P a g e | 75

Process Checklist: THE FOUR BASES


UNITY
 Have you included a clear topic sentence that tells what process you will be describing?
 Does the rest of your paragraph support your topic sentence?

SUPPORT
 Have you included all the essential information so that anyone reading your paragraph
could follow the same process?

COHERENCE
 Have you made the sequence of steps easy to follow by using transitions like, first,
second, then, during, and finally?

SENTENCE SKILLS
 Have you used a consistent point of view throughout your paragraph?
 Have you added specific rather than general words?
 Are the sentences varied?
 Has the paragraph been checked for spelling and other sentence skills?

BEYOND THE
CLASSROOM
PROCESS

Beyond the classroom, there are many instances where process writing is used. For example, a
salesperson may need to explain to a customer how to install computer software or set up the
wiring for a new TV.
For this writing piece, you will write a process paragraph with a specific purpose and for a specific
audience. You have two options.

Option 1
Imagine that you have a job helping at a day-care centre. The director, who is pleased with your
work and wants to give you more responsibility, has put you in charge of a group activity (for
example, a playground game, or an art project). Before you actually begin the activity, the director
wants to see a summary of how you would go about it. What advance preparation would be needed,
and what exactly would you be doing throughout the project? Write a paragraph explaining the
steps you would follow in conducting the activity.
P a g e | 76

Option 2
Alternatively, write an explanation you might give to the children on how to do a simple classroom
task―getting ready for naptime, watering a plant, putting toys or other classroom materials away,
or any task of your choice. Explain each step in a way that a child would understand.
P a g e | 77

CHAPTER
9 CAUSE & EFFECT

What Are We Trying to Achieve and Why?

Setting the Stage


What caused the accident shown in the photo? Was the driver in the overturned truck
simply careless? Was there a mechanical failure? Was there a weather-related problem like ice on
the road? Did the driver swerve to avoid a potential accident, thus causing his own? We ask these
questions as we try to understand or assign responsibility for an action—that is, as we try to
determine its causes. When we speculate about the outcome of an event, we are concerned with
its effects. What will happen to the driver at fault—a ticket, a fine, jail time? How will this accident
affect his career? If he has had problems in the past, will his insurance rates go up? Will he be
fired? Will any other company hire him after this accident?
When we apply this question-and-answer process to the events in our lives, we are dealing
with cause-and-effect thinking, the focus of this Chapter.
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Discovering Causes and Effects


Many events have more than one cause and more than one effect, even when these added causes
and effects are not obvious to us. For example, we might think that a student did poorly on an
algebra exam because he didn’t study enough. This is likely a primary, or main, cause, but perhaps
there are other significant reasons, which we could explore with a lost like the following:
QUESTIONS FOR EXPLORING CAUSES

• Primary: What causes would certainly bring about the event?


• Secondary: What causes might reasonably bring about the event?
• Contributing: What causes might play a role by creating or adding to another cause?
• Immediate: What is the cause closest in time that produced the event?
• Distant: What causes might be separated from the event by time or space?
• Hidden: What causes might not be readily apparent?
• Minor: What causes might be involved in a lesser way (and in some cases be mistaken
for significant ones)?
Applying these questions to the failed algebra exam, we might come up with this list:

• Primary: insufficient studying


• Secondary: argument with parents the night prior to the test
• Contributing: work demands cutting into study time
• Immediate: answering only half the problems
• Distant: not grasping arithmetic concepts from earlier grad levels
• Hidden: undiagnosed attention deficit disorder
• Minor: student nearby whistling throughout the exam
Now we can see that there are many reasons for poor grades, and we would pick the ones best
suited to our purpose, interest, and audience. Notice that what might be only a secondary reason
for one person might be a primary reason for another. For example, the argument might have upset
the student so much that he could not think clearly during the exam. In addition, a distant or hidden
cause might be crucial to the effect, so you must decide which causes or effects are most
significant.
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ACTIVITY 9.1: Discovering Causes and Effects


Working in pairs, discuss one of the following topics, brainstorming for causes or effects. The
“Questions for Exploring Causes” may help you discover ideas. Next, list six possible causes or
effects. Then decide which three are most likely, and tell why you eliminated the others.

EXAMPLE:
Topic: being elected valedictorian of your graduating class
Possible causes:
1. Having overall highest GPA 2. Making A’s on all final exams

3. Having a parent as the principal 4. Getting early computer training


5. Having good study habits 6. Being rewarded by parents for A’s

Reasons for cutting causes: Number 3 is not likely because GPA, not the principal, determines the
valedictorian. Causes 4 and 6 could contribute to student success but are not as significant as causes
1, 2, and 5.

1. Topic: requiring all high school students to take a course that educate about addictive
substances

Possible causes:
1. 2.
3. 4.
5. 6.

Reasons for cutting causes:


______________________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________
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2. Topic: youngsters are terrified of school

Possible causes:
1. 2.
3. 4.
5. 6.

Reasons for cutting causes:


______________________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________

3. Topic: marrying while still teenagers

Possible effects:
1. 2.
3. 4.
5. 6.

Reasons for cutting effects:


______________________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________
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4. Topic: watching too much television

Possible effects:
1. 2.
3. 4.
5. 6.

Reasons for cutting effects:


______________________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________

Paragraphs to Consider
Treatment of American Indians
1Two major policies, the Indian Removal Act of 1830 and the Dawes Severalty Act of 1887,
had profound and lasting effects on American Indians. 2In 1830, President Andrew Jackson
signed the act that authorized the United States government to transfer eastern American Indians
like the Cherokee into unclaimed western territories. 3After several years of court battles, what
followed was one of the most heartbreaking events in early American history―The Trail of
Tears. 4Thousands of Cherokee men, women, and children were forced to march more than a
thousand miles to Oklahoma. 5Estimates say that at least four thousand died on the journey.
6Then, in 1887, the Dawes Act allowed the United States government the right to divide
reservation lands among individual American Indians and their families. 7In other words, it gave
plots of land to those who were willing to sign a registry, anglicize their names, and renounce
allegiance to their tribe. 8Reservations were broken up, tribes fought among themselves, and the
unity that was central to tribes’ survival disappeared. 9Today, there are about three hundred
reservations in the United States, but there are over five hundred recognized tribes. 10Most
reservations are located in the western portion of the United States in areas that often lack natural
resources, and many have high rates of poverty and unemployment
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Why I Stopped Smoking


1For one thing, I realized that my cigarette smoke bothered others, irritating people’s
eyes and causing them to cough and sneeze. 2They also had to put up with my stinking
smoker’s breath. 3Also, cigarettes are a messy habit. 4Our house was littered with
ashtrays piled high with butts, matchsticks, and ashes, and the children were always
knocking them over. 5Cigarettes are expensive, and I estimated that the carton a week
that I was smoking cost me about $2000 a year.. 6Another reason I stopped was because
I felt exploited. 7I hated the thought of wealthy, greedy corporations making money off
my sweat and blood. 8The rich may keep getting richer, but―at least as regards
cigarettes―with no thanks to me. 9Cigarettes were also inconvenient. 10Whenever I
smoked, I would have to drink something to wet my dry throat, and that meant I had to
keep going to the bathroom all the time. 11I sometimes seemed to spend whole weekends
doing nothing but smoking, drinking, and going to the bathroom. 12Most of all I resolved
to stop smoking when the message about cigarettes being harmful to health finally got
through to me. 13I had known they could hurt the smoker―in fact, a heavy smoker I
know from work is in Eagleville Hospital now with lung cancer. 14However, when I
realized what secondhand smoke could do my wife and children, causing them bronchial
problems and even increasing their risk of cancer, it really bothered me.

About Unity
1. Which of the paragraphs lacks a topic sentence
__________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________.
About Support
2. What pieces of evidence does the author use to support the point that the Indian Removal
Act and Dawes Severalty Act had lasting effects on American Indians?

________________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________

3. How many separate causes are given in “Why I Stopped Smoking”?

_______
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About Coherence
4. Which sentences in “Treatment of American Indians” contain transition words or phrases?
(Write the sentence numbers here.)

_______________________________________________________________________

Complete the partial outlines provided for the paragraph:

The Joys of an Old Car


My “antique” has opened my eyes to the rewards of owning an old car. One obvious reward of
owning my old Toyota is economy. We save money on insurance since it is no longer worthwhile
for us to have collision coverage. Old age has even been kind to the Toyota’s engine, which has
required only three major repairs in the last several years. It still delivers twenty-eight miles per
gallon in the city and forty-one on the highway—not bad for a senior citizen. In addition, my car
is very dependable. I have heard that when Toyota passes the twenty-thousand-mile mark with no
problems, it will probably go on forever. I would not disagree. Our Toyota breezed past that mark
many years ago. Since then, I have been able to count on it to sputter to life and make its way down
the driveway on the coldest, snowiest mornings. When my boss was stuck with his brand-new
BMW in the worst snowstorm of the year, I sauntered into work on time. Finally, having the same
car for many years offers the advantage of familiarity. When I open the door and slide into the
driver’s seat, the soft vinyl surrounds me like a well-worn glove. I know to the millimeter exactly
how much room I have when I turn a corner or back into a curbside parking space. The front wheels
invariably begin to shake when I go more than fifty-five miles an hour, reminding me that I am
exceeding the speed limit. In summary, I prize my twenty-year-old Toyota’s economy,
dependability, and most of all, its familiarity.

Topic Sentence My “antique” has opened my eyes to the rewards of owning an old car.
Supporting Detail 1: ___________________________
a. ___________________________
b. ___________________________
c. ___________________________
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Supporting Detail 2: _______________________


a. ________________________
b. ________________________
c. ________________________

Supporting Detail 2: _______________________


a. ________________________
b. ________________________
c. ________________________

Concluding Sentence: _________________________________________________________

CAUSE AND EFFECT CHECKLIST: THE FOUR BASES


UNITY
 Have you included a clear topic sentence that states the main idea?
 Does the rest of your paragraph support your topic sentence?
 Is there any irrelevant materials that should be eliminated or rewritten?

SUPPORT
 Does the paragraph provide specific details?

COHERENCE
 Have I used transition words to help readers follow my train of thought?
 Have I provided a concluding sentence to wrap up the paragraph?

SENTENCE SKILLS
 Have you used a consistent point of view throughout your paragraph?
 Have you added specific rather than general words?
 Are the sentences varied?
 Has the paragraph been checked for spelling and other sentence skills?
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BEYOND THE
CLASSROOM
COMPARISON
AND CONTRAST
Beyond the classroom, there are many instances where cause or effect writing would be used for
example, a nutritionist may have to explain to a patient the dietary causes of hypertension, or a
pharmacist may have to explain the effects that a particular drug has on someone with diabetes.

For this writing paper, you will write a cause or effect paragraph with a specific purpose and for a
specific audience.

Assume that your boss has asked you to write an issue that is affecting your career field. In your
writing, you should write what has caused this issue. For instance, nurses might be affected by a
rise in workloads because of a lack of qualified nurses, budget cuts, or an increase in patients.
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CHAPTER
10 INTRODUCTION TO ESSAY

What Is an Essay?
Differences between an Essay and a Paragraph
An essay is simply a paper of several paragraphs, rather than one paragraph, that
supports a single point. In an essay, subjects can and should be treated more fully than
they would in a single-paragraph paper. Unlike paragraphs that are usually developed
using one mode of writing, like description, essays are usually developed using several
modes of writing to support the single point.
The main idea or point developed in an essay is called the THESIS STATEMENT or
THESIS SENTENCE (rather than, as in a paragraph, the topic sentence). The thesis
statement appears in the introductory paragraph, and it is then developed in the
supporting paragraphs that follow. A concluding paragraph closes the essay.
A good thesis statement does two things.
1. it tells readers an essay's topic
2. it presents the writer's attitude, opinion, idea, or point about that topic.
For example, look at the following thesis statement:
Owning a pet has several important benefits.
In this thesis statement, the topic is owning a pet; the writer's main point is that
owning a pet has several important benefits.
When writing thesis statements, people often make mistakes that undermine their
chances of producing an effective essay.
1. Write Statements, Not Announcements
Example:
• The subject of this paper will be my parents.
• I want to talk about the crime wave in our country.
• The baby-boom generation is the concern of this essay.
Revised thesis statements
• My parents each struggled with personal demons.
• The recent crime wave in our city has several apparent causes.
• The baby-boom generation has changed American society in key ways.
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2. Avoid Statements That Are Too Broad


Example:
• Disease has shaped human history.
• Insects are fascinating creatures.
• Men and women are very different.
Revised thesis statements
• In the mid-1980s, AIDS changed people's attitudes about dating.
• Strength, organization, and communication make the ant one of nature's
most successful insects.
• Men and women are often treated very differently in the workplace.

3. Avoid Statements That Are Too Narrow


Example:
• The speed limit near my home is sixty-five miles per hour.
• A hurricane hit southern Florida last summer.
• A person must be at least thirty-five years old to be elected president of the
United States.
Revised thesis statements
• The speed limit near my home should be lowered to fifty-five miles per hour
for several reasons.
• Federal officials made a number of mistakes in their response to the recent
Florida hurricane.
• The requirement that a U.S. president must be at least thirty-five years old is
unfair and unreasonable.

4. Avoid Statements That Contain More Than One Idea.


Example:
• One of the most serious problems affecting young people today is bullying,
and it is time more kids learned the value of helping others.
• Studying with others has several benefits, but it also has drawbacks and can
be difficult to schedule.
• Teachers have played an important role in my life, but they were not as
important as my parents.
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Revised thesis statements


• One of the most serious problems affecting young people today is bullying.
• Studying with others has several benefits.
• Teachers have played an important role in my life.

ACTIVITY 10.1
Write TN next to the statements that are too narrow to be developed in an essay. Write
TB beside the statements that are too broad to be covered in an essay. Then, revise the
statements to make them each an effective thesis.
1. The way our society treats elderly people is unbelievable.
2. Up to 70 percent of teenage marriages end in divorce.
3. Action must be taken against drugs.
4. I failed my biology course.
5. In many ways, sports are an important part of American life.
6. I had tomatoes, squash, and corn in my garden last summer.
7. Running away from home taught me that my parents weren’t as terrible as I
thought.
8. Modern life makes people suspicious and unfriendly.
9. Because I was late yesterday, I lost an hour’s pay and was called in to see the
boss.
10. The main road into our town is lined with billboards.

ACTIVITY 10.2
Write A next to statements that are announcements rather than thesis statements. Write
MI beside statements that contain more than one idea. Then, revise the statements to
make them each an effective thesis.
1. This essay will discuss the fitness classes offered at my gym.
2. This paper will be about the toys my cat prefers.
3. One of the most serious problems affecting young people today is bullying, and it
is time more kids learned the value of helping others.
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4. Studying with others has several benefits, but it also has drawbacks and can be
difficult to schedule.
5. Variations of the pancake is the subject of this paper.

ACTIVITY 10.3
Write a thesis for each group of supporting statements (topic sentences).
1. Thesis:_____________________
a. My first car was a rebellious-looking one that matched the way I felt and
acted as a teenager.

b. My next car reflected my more mature and practical adult self.


c. My latest car seems to tell me that I’m aging; it shows my growing
concern with comfort and safety.

2. Thesis: _______________________
a. All the course credits that are accumulated can be transferred to a four
year school.
b. Going to a two-year college can save a great deal of money in tuition and
other fees.
c. If the college is nearby, there are also significant savings in everyday
living expenses.

3. Thesis: _________________________
a. First, I tried simply avoiding the snacks aisle of the supermarket.
b. Then I started limiting myself to only five units of any given snack.
c. Finally, in desperation, I began keeping the cellophane bags of snacks in a
padlocked cupboard.
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4. Thesis: _________________________
a. The holiday can be very frightening for little children.
b. Children can be struck by cars while wearing vision-obstructing masks
and dark costumes.
c. There are always incidents involving deadly treats: fruits, cookies, and
candies that contain razor blades or even poison.

5. Thesis: ____________________________
a. First of all, I was a typical type A personality: anxious, impatient, and
hard-driving.
b. I also have a family history of relatives with heart trouble.
c. My unhealthy lifestyle, though, was probably the major factor.

ACTIVITY 10.4
Support the following thesis statements with specific evidence.

1. We quickly spruced up the apartment before our guest arrived.


a. Hid toys and newspapers in spare closet
b. Vacuumed pet hairs off sofa
c. _________________________________

2. College registration can be a confusing process.


a. Some classes fill quickly.
b. Several placements tests are needed.
c. _______________________________

3. People seek out comfort food at roadside diners.


a. Meatloaf sandwich
b. Baked macaroni and cheese
c. _____________________
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4. White lies are socially acceptable.


a. Avoiding hurting a person’s feelings
b. Avoiding facing consequences
c. _______________________

5. Back-to-school shopping can be expensive.


a. Backpack
b. Textbooks
c. _______________________

6. Big-box stores such as Wal-Mart have everything shoppers need.


a. Supermarket
b. Pharmacy
c. ______________

7. A cell phone can be customized to fit the owner.


a. Ringtone
b. Wallpaper
c. ____________

8. Technology makes handling finances so much easier.


a. Automatic bill payments
b. Online banking services
c. __________________
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9. My boss has three qualities I admire.


a. Shrewdness
b. Intelligence
c. __________________

10. Travelling by air is stressful.


a. Security restrictions
b. Delayed flights
c. ______________

Writing an Essay Outline


Below is a paragraph, written by Diana Woods, on why movie going is a nuisance. A
paragraph is a short paper of around 150-200 words. It usually consists of a topic
sentence, followed by a series of sentences that support the point.

The Hazards of Movie going


Although I love movies, I’ve found that there are drawbacks to movie going. One
problem is just the inconvenience of it all. To get to the theater, I have to drive for at
least fifteen minutes, or more if traffic is bad. It can take forever to find a parking
spot, and then I have to walk across a huge parking lot to the theater. There I
encounter long lines, sold-out shows, and ever increasing prices. And I hate sitting
with my feet sticking to the floor because of other people’s spilled snacks. Another
problem is my lack of self-control at the theater. I often stuff myself with calorie-
laden snacks. My choices might include a bucket of popcorn, a box of Milk Duds, a
giant soda, or all three. The worst problem is some of the other moviegoers. Kids run
up and down the aisle. Teenagers laugh and shout at the screen. People of all ages
drop soda cups and popcorn tubs, cough and burp, and talk to one another. All in all,
I would rather stay home and watch a DVD in the comfort of my own living room.
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Paragraph Outline
Point Support – There are drawbacks to movie going.
1. Inconvenience
a. Fifteen minute drive to theater
b. Long time to find parking spot and long walk to the theater
c. Long lines, sold-out shows, and increasing prices
d. Sticky floor
2. Lack of self-control
a. Often stuff myself with unhealthy snacks
b. Might have popcorn, candy, soda, or all three

3. Other moviegoers
a. Running kids
b. Laughing, shouting teenagers
c. People of all ages make noise

Structure of the Traditional Essay


Model Essay and Outline from the paragraph above on Hazards of Moviegoing.

Introductory I am a movie fanatic. My friends count on me to know movie trivia (who


paragraph was the pig-tailed little girl in E.T.? Drew Barrymore) and to remember
every big Oscar awarded since I was in high school (Best Picture, 1994?
(Thesis) Forest Gump) My friends, though, have stopped asking me if I want to go
out to the movies. While I love movies as much as ever, the inconvenience
of going out, the temptations of the concession stand, and the behavior of
some patrons are reasons for me to wait and rent the DVD.
First To begin with, I just don’t enjoy the general hassle of the evening. Since
supporting small local movie theaters are a thing of the past, I have to drive for
paragraph fifteen minutes to get to the nearest multiplex. The parking lot is shared
with several restaurants and a supermarket, so it is always jammed. I have
to drive around at a snail’s pace until I find another driver backing out.
Then it’s time to stand in an endless line, with the constant threat that the
tickets the show I want will sell out. If we do get tickets, the theater will
be so crowded that I won’t be able to sit with my friends, or we’ll end up
in the front rows looking up at the giant screen. I have to shell out a
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ridiculous amount of money – up to $11 – for a ticket. That entitles me to


sit while my shoes seal themselves to a sticky floor coated with spilled
soda, bubble gum and crushed Raisinets.
Second Second, the theater offers tempting snacks that I really don’t need. Like
supporting most of us, I have to battle an expanding waistline. At home I do pretty
paragraph well by simply not buying stuff that is bad for me. I can make do with
snacks like celery and carrot sticks because there is no ice-cream in the
freezer. Going to the theater, however, is like spending an evening in a 7-
Eleven that’s been equipped with a movie screen and comfortable seats.
As I try to persuade myself to just have a Diet Coke, the smell of fresh
popcorn dripping with butter soon overcomes me. Chocolate bars the size
of small automobiles seem to jump into my hands. I risk pulling out my
fillings as I chew enormous mouthfuls of Milk Duds. By the time I leave
the theater, I feel disgusted with myself.
Third Many of the patrons are even more of a problem than the concession
supporting stand. Little kids race up and down the aisles, usually in giggling packs.
paragraph Teenagers try to impress their friends by talking back to the screen,
whistling, and making what they consider to be hilarious noises. Adults
act as if they were at home in their own living rooms. They comment
loudly on the ages of the stars and reveal plot twists that are supposed to
be a secret until the film’s end. And people of all ages create distractions.
They crinkle candy wrappers, stick gum on their seats, and drop popcorn
tubs or cups of crushed ice and soda on the floor. They also cough and
burp, squirm endlessly in their seats, file out for repeated trips to the rest
rooms or concession stand, and elbow you out of the armrest on either
side of your seat.
Concluding After arriving home from the movies one night, I decided that I was not
paragraph going to be a moviegoer anymore. I was tired of the problems involved in
getting to the movies, resisting unhealthy snacks, and dealing with the
patrons. The next day I arranged to have premium movie channels added
to my cable TV service, and I got a Netflix membership. I may now see
movies a bit later than other people, but I'll be more relaxed watching box
office hits in the comfort of my own living room.

Thesis: While I love movies as much as ever, the inconvenience of going out, the
temptations of the concession stand, and the behavior of some patrons are reasons for
me to wait and rent the DVD.
Topic Sentence 1: To begin with, I just don’t enjoy the general hassle of the evening.
Supporting detail 1: Long drive of about fifteen minutes
Supporting detail 2: Jammed parking lot
Supporting detail 3: Endless ticket line
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Supporting detail 4: Sold out tickets and crowded theater


Supporting detail 5: Expensive tickets

Topic Sentence 2: Second, the theater offers tempting snacks that I really don’t
need.
Supporting detail 1: At home, only snacks are celery and carrot sticks.
Supporting detail 2: Theater is like a 7-Eleven with seats
a. fresh popcorn
b. chocolate bars
c. Milk Duds

Topic Sentence 3: Many of the patrons are even more of a problem than the
concession stand.

Supporting detail 1: Little kids race up and down the aisle


Supporting detail 2: Teenagers talk back to the screen, whistle, and make
funny noises
Supporting detail 3: Adults talk loudly and reveal plot twists.
Supporting detail 4: People of all ages create distractions.

ACTIVITY10. 5
The following essay needs specific details to back up the ideas in the supporting
paragraphs. Using the spaces provided, add a sentence or two of clear, convincing
details for each supporting idea.

Life without Television


When my family's only television set went to the repair shop the other day, my
parents, my sister, and I thought we would have a terrible week. How could we get
through the long evenings in such a quiet house? What would it be like without all
the shows to keep us company? We soon realized, though, that living without
television for a while was a stroke of good fortune. It became easy for each of us to
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enjoy some activities alone, to complete some postponed chores, and to spend
rewarding time with each other and friends.
First supporting paragraph
First of all, with no television to compete for our time, we found plenty of hours for
personal interests. We all read more that week than we had read during the six months
before.______________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________
We each also enjoyed some hobbies we had ignored for
ages.________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________
In addition, my sister and I both stopped procrastinating with our
homework._________________________________________________________
_________________________
Second supporting paragraph
Second, we did chores that had been hanging over our heads for too long. There were
many jobs around the house that had needed attention for some
time.______________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________
____________
_________________________________________________________________ We
also had a chance to do some long-postponed shopping.___________________
_________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________
And each of us also caught up with e-mail and did paperwork that was long
overdue.___________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________
Third supporting paragraph
Finally, and probably most important, we spent time with each other. Instead of just
being in the same room together while we stared at a screen, we actually talked for
many pleasant hours.________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________
Moreover, for the first time in years, my family played some games
together.___________________________________________________________
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_________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________
And because we didn't have to worry about missing this or that show, we had some
family friends over on a couple of evenings and spent an enjoyable time with
them.____________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________
Conclusion
Once our television returned, we were not prepared to put it in the attic. But we had
a sense of how it can take over our lives if we are not careful. We are now more
selective. We turn on the set for our favorite shows, certain sports events, and the
news, but we don't leave it running all evening. As a result, we find we can enjoy
television and still have time left over for other activities and interests.

Transitions
Transitional Words
Transitions signal the direction of a writer's thoughts. They are like the road signs
that guide travelers. In the box that follows are some common transitions, grouped
according to the kind of signal they give to readers. Note that certain words provide
more than one kind of signal.

Common Transitions
Addition signals: one, first of all, second, the third reason, also, next, another, and, in
addition, moreover, furthermore, finally, last of all
Time signals: first, then, next, after, as, before, while, meanwhile, soon, now, during,
finally
Space signals: next to, across, on the opposite side, to the left, to the right, above,
below, near, nearby
Change-of-direction signals: but, however, yet, in contrast, although, otherwise, still,
on the contrary, on the other hand
Illustration signals: for example, for instance, specifically, as an illustration, once,
such as
Conclusion signals: therefore, consequently, thus, then, as a result, in summary, to
conclude, last of all, finally
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Transitional Sentences
Transitional sentences, or linking sentences, are used between paragraphs to help tie
together the supporting paragraphs in an essay. They enable the reader to move
smoothly from the idea in one paragraph to the idea in the next paragraph.

Example:
To set up a realistic exercise regime, people need to follow a simple plan
consisting of arranging time, making preparations, and starting off at a sensible pace.
The first step is arranging time. Most people who don't regularly exercise have
excuses for not exercising: a heavy schedule at work or school; being rushed in the
morning and exhausted at night; or too many other responsibilities. One simple
solution is to get up half an hour earlier in the morning. The next step is making
preparations. Having necessary items like workout clothes, videos, and exercise
equipment laid out and ready makes it much easier to get started. Finally, people
who are just beginning an exercise regime should start off at a sensible pace. Many
workout videos have different levels of exercise programs and new exercisers should
always start with level one to avoid injuries. Through careful planning and common
sense, anyone can start exercising.

DIAGRAM OF AN ESSAY

To write an effective essay, first prepare an outline, using a form like the one below.

Thesis Statement _________________________________________________

Topic Sentence 1 _________________________________________________

Supporting a. _________________
Details b. _________________
c. _________________

Topic Sentence 2 _________________________________________________

Supporting a. _________________
Details b. _________________
c. _________________
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Topic Sentence 3 _________________________________________________

Supporting a. _________________
Details b. _________________
c. _________________

Conclu- Summary and/or Closing Remarks ____________________________


sion

ACTIVITY10. 6: OUTLINING AN ESSAY


Read the essay below. Then outline it on a separate sheet of paper. Write out the thesis
statement and topic sentences, and list the three major points that fit under each topic
sentence.
Escape Reading
Everyone needs to escape from a dull routine. Escape can sometimes be
dangerous—if a person turns to alcohol or drugs, for instance. But escaping
into a sport or hobby can be a healthy way to turn off the daily pressures. My
escape hatch is reading books that carry me to other times and places.
I often escape, first of all, into spy stories. These books are usually set in exotic
lands I’m sure I will never actually see. Spies, for example, pass information
to each other in a market in Tokyo, a cafe in Venice, or an airport in Mumbai.
In addition, spy novels are filled with fascinating marvels of technology. James
Bond has his Lotus car equipped with smokescreen and machine gun controls,
of course, but even less-glamorous spies use hidden Web cams and
microphones that pick up conversations miles away. The intricate, twisted
plots of spy stories also aid the sensation of total escape. Keeping up with the
secret agents, the counterspies, and the double crosses occupies my mind
completely. I don’t worry about whether my car will pass inspection when I’m
trying to figure out which British agent is really working for the enemy.

A second kind of escape reading I enjoy is the Western. A book by Zane Grey
or Louis L’Amour is filled with the atmosphere of a long-ago era. I can live
for a time in a town like Dodge City; I can almost see the dusty main street,
the raised wooden sidewalks, and the women wearing calico sunbonnets. The
Western also helps me escape by providing plenty of action. Almost every
page puts me in the midst of a cattle roundup, a gunfight, or a galloping posse.
P a g e | 100

The non-stop action won’t allow my mind to wander back to the real world
until I turn the last page. Finally, a Western tempts me to escape into it because
the story usually describes a simpler, less confusing world than my own. The
characters are either good guys or bad guys, and it is easy to tell the difference.
In the Old West, justice always triumphs in the end.
The final and most enjoyable escape I know is reading horror stories. For one
thing, such stories keep me interested because the authors create fascinating
imaginary monsters. A story about a slimy creature that emerges from a
graveyard or a huge, hundred-pound rat that lives in a basement is a story that
blanks out reality. Horror stories introduce me to imaginary places as well. A
horror tale can be set in a series of tunnels beneath the Himalayas or in another
dimension that exists only in a spooky old house. Pure shock, however, is what
makes horror stories sure-fire escapes. The problems I have at work could
never be as bad, for example, as the horrible situations Stephen King’s
characters endure. As I read about a woman being chased by a rabid St.
Bernard, or a little boy being pursued by an insane and murderous father, I
forget the outside world completely.

The members of my family have learned to leave me in peace when I escape


into my books. They know that giving me such time means that I will be
easier to live with. After I have returned from a dangerous spy mission, a
Western shoot-out, or a house of horror, I can deal more calmly with everyday
crises at home.
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Chapter
11 Introduction to the Readings

This part of the book will help you become a better reader as well as a stron-
ger writer. Reading and writing are closely connected skills—so practicing one
skill helps develop the other. Included here are ten high-interest reading selec-
tions that provide inspiration for a wide range of paragraph and essay writing
assignments.

The Format of Each Selection


To help you read the selections effectively—and write about them effectively—the
following features are included.

Preview
A short preview introduces you to each reading selection and its author. These
previews will help you start thinking about a selection even before you begin to
read it.

“Words to Watch”
A list of difficult words with their paragraph numbers and their meanings as they
are used in the reading precedes each selection. You may find it helpful to read
through “Words to Watch” to remind yourself of meanings or to learn new ones.
Within the reading itself, each listed word is marked with a small bullet (•). When
you’re reading, if you are not sure of the definition of a word marked with this bul-
let, go back and look it up in “Words to Watch.”

Reading Comprehension Questions


Following each selection, a series of questions gives you practice in four reading
skills widely recognized as important to comprehension. These skills have to do
with (1) vocabulary, (2) main and central ideas, (3) key details, and (4) inferences.
Sentence Skills with Readings, Fifth Edition P a g e | 102

Introduction to the Readings

1 Understanding Vocabulary in Context The context of a word consists of the


words that surround it. We learn many words by guessing their meanings from
their context. For example, look at the sentence below. Can you figure out the
meaning of the italicized word? After reading the sentence, try to answer the
multiple-choice item.

Karen was euphoric when the college that was her first choice accepted her.
The word euphoric in the above sentence means
a. puzzled.
b. angry.
c. overjoyed.
d. sad.
You can figure out the meaning of euphoric on the basis of its context. Since Karen
was accepted by the college that was her first choice, we can assume that she was
overjoyed (c) rather than puzzled, angry, or sad. Understanding vocabulary in con-
text is a very useful skill to develop, since we often meet new words in our reading.
If we pay attention to their context, we may not need a dictionary to figure out what
Copyright © 2014 McGraw-Hill, a business unit of The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc. All rights reserved.

they mean.

2 Determining Main Ideas and the Central Idea As you learned in Part One of
this book, a paragraph is about a point, or main idea, which is often expressed in
a topic sentence; and in an essay, there is an overall main idea, often called the
central idea. While the reading selections here are longer than the essays you write
for your classes, they follow this same pattern. Sometimes the author of a selection
states the central idea directly in one or more sentences; sometimes the reader must
figure it out. In either case, to know what an author is really saying, readers must
determine the central idea and the main ideas that support it.

3 Recognizing Key Supporting Details Supporting details are reasons, examples,


and other kinds of information that help explain or clarify main ideas and the cen-
tral idea. Recognizing key supporting details is an important part of understanding
an author’s message.

4 Making Inferences Often, an author does not state a point directly. Instead, he
or she only suggests the point, and the reader must infer it—in other words, fig-
ure it out. We make inferences every day, basing them on our understanding and
experience. For example, suppose you take your seat in a lecture class in which
the instructor always reads from notes in a boring tone of voice. A fellow student
comments, “Well, this should be another thrilling lecture.” You readily infer—you
conclude from the circumstances—that your classmate is not saying what he or she
means. The meaning is really the opposite of what was said.
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Part 4 Readings for Writing

Here is another example of inference. Consider the sentence below. What can
you infer from it? Circle the letter of the most logical inference.
Two elderly men silently played chess on a park bench, ignoring both the hot
July sun and a fortyish woman who held a red umbrella over her head while
watching their game.
The sentence suggests that
a. the men disliked the woman.
b. the woman was related to one of the men.
c. it was raining heavily.
d. the woman wanted to protect herself from the sun.
If the men were concentrating on their game, they would be likely to ignore their
surroundings, including the woman, so nothing in the sentence suggests that they
disliked her, and a is therefore not a logical inference. Also, nothing in the sentence
suggests that the men knew the woman, so b is not a logical inference, either. And
c is also incorrect, since the sentence mentions only the sun: if it were sunny and
raining at the same time, the sentence would surely note such an unusual situation.
That leaves only d as the correct inference—that the woman was using the um-
brella to protect herself from the “hot July sun.”
Making inferences like these is often necessary for a full understanding of an
author’s point.

Technique Questions
Questions about technique point to methods writers have used to present their ma-
terial effectively. In particular, technique questions make you aware of directly
stated central ideas, methods of organization, transition words, and vivid details
that help writers make their ideas come alive for the reader. Focusing on such tech-
niques will help you use them in your own writing.

Discussion Questions
The discussion questions help you think in detail about ideas raised by the selec-
tion and make connections between the selection and your own life. They will
help you look closely at what you value, whom you respect, and how you react to
people and situations.

Writing Assignments
The writing assignments following each selection are based specifically on that
selection. Many assignments provide guidelines on how to proceed, including
suggestions about prewriting, possible topic sentences and thesis statements, and
methods of development.
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Introduction to the Readings

Hints for Effective Reading


Effective reading, like effective writing, does not happen all at once. Rather,
it is a process. Often you begin with a general impression of what something
means, and then, by rereading, you move to a deeper level of understanding of
the material.
Here are some hints for becoming a better reader:
1. Read in the right place. Ideally, you should get settled in a quiet spot
that encourages concentration. If you can focus your attention while lying
on a bed or curled up in a chair, that’s fine. But if you find that being very
comfortable leads to daydreaming or dozing off rather than reading, then
avoid getting too relaxed. You might find that sitting in an upright chair
promotes concentration and keeps your mind alert.
2. Preview the selection. Begin by reading the overview that precedes the
selection. Then think for a minute about the title. A good title often hints at
a selection’s central idea, giving you insight into the piece even before you
read it. For example, you can deduce from the title of Alice Walker’s essay
“My Daughter Smokes” that Walker is going to offer commentary about
Copyright © 2014 McGraw-Hill, a business unit of The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc. All rights reserved.

her daughter’s habit.


3. Read the selection through for pleasure. Allow yourself to be drawn into
the world that the author has created. Don’t slow down or turn back. Instead,
just read to understand as much as you can the first time through. After this
reading, sit back for a moment and think about what you enjoyed in the piece.
4. Deepen your sense of the selection. Go back and reread it, or at least
reread the passages that were not clear the first time through. Look up any
words that you cannot figure out from context, and write their meanings in
the margin. Then ask yourself the following questions:
• What is the central idea of the piece?
• What are the main supporting points for the central idea?
• How does the author explain and illustrate these main supporting points?

Reread carefully the parts of the selection that seem most relevant to answering these questions.
By asking yourself the questions and by rereading, you will gradually deepen your understanding of
the material.
P a g e | 105

Part 4 Readings for Writing

Talkin’ White
Wayne Lionel Aponte

PREVIEW

How often have people attempted to identify where you’re from based on
your accent, patterns of speech, or turns of phrases? In the essay that follows,
Wayne Lionel Aponte describes his experience growing up in a black com-
munity where speaking grammatically correct English was not only frowned
upon but also considered by other black community members as an attempt
to “sound white.”

WORDS TO WATCH

showboating (2): impressing


elocution (2): manner of speaking
oratory (3); the art of public speaking
marginal (5): on the outside
polylingual (5): ability to speak many languages
matriculated (9): admitted as a student

Recently, during a conversation on film at a dinner party, when I was using my 1


best college-educated English, I was asked where I was born. I received a curious
look when I replied, with pride, “Harlem.” The questioner, whom I had met through
a mutual friend, looked at me as if I were a brother from another planet and imme-
diately wanted to know whether I’d lived in Harlem all my life. When I responded,
“Yeah, man, I been cold chillin’ on Lenox Avenue ever since I was rockin’ my fly
diapers,” he laughed, and I realized his was a nervous laughter, the kind folks use to
mask their thoughts. Has he really lived in Harlem all his life? He talks white was the
thought behind his laughter, and the follow-up question asked after my departure.
While growing up in Harlem during my not-so-long-ago elementary and 2
middle-school days, I often encountered the phrase “talkin’ white.” It was usually
thrust on people who were noticed because they were speaking grammatically cor-
rect English in a community that did not. I’ve also heard the term applied to people
who place themselves above others by verbally showboating• with the elocution•
of a Lionel Trilling or a Sir Laurence Olivier.
Nevertheless, I’ve always loved those folks who have mastered the art of manip- 3
ulating words. Eloquent oratory• and masterful writing have stimulated my mind
for as long as I can remember. I took great pride in my ability to mimic and to
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Talkin’ White

slowly transform the styles of my favorite writers and orators into my own voice.
In this sense language is a form of intellectual play for me.
When I was a child, my reaction to the question “Why do you talk so white?” 4
was to alter my spoken English drastically (once “Ask yo mama” became less ef-
fective and after I ran out of money for candy bribes to make the kids like me).
Like most children, I wanted to be liked and wanted to blend into each new social
circle. But speaking as I did make blending difficult since it brought favorable at-
tention from teachers that, outside the classroom, evoked fierce verbal attacks from
my peers. I never could quite understand how talking slang proved I was Black.
Nor did I understand why I couldn’t be accepted as a full-fledged, card-holding
member of the group by speaking my natural way.
Hearing the laughter, though, and being the butt of “proper” and “Oreo” jokes hurt 5
me. Being criticized made me feel marginal•—and verbally impotent in the sense that
I had little ammunition to stop the frequent lunchtime attacks. So I did what was nec-
essary to fit in, whether that meant cursing excessively or signifying [goading, often
good-naturedly]. Ultimately I somehow learned to be polylingual• and to become
sensitive linguistically in the way animals are able to sense the danger of bad weather.
The need to defend myself led me to use language as a weapon to deflect jokes 6
about the “whiteness” of my spoken English and to launch harsh verbal counter-
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attacks. Simultaneously language served as a mask to hide the hurt I often felt in
the process. Though over time my ability to “talk that talk”—slang—gained me a
new respect from my peers, I didn’t want to go through life using slang to prove
I am Black. So I decided “I yam what I yam,” and to take pride in myself. I am
my speaking self, but this doesn’t mean that I’m turning my back on Black people.
There are various shades of Blackness; I don’t have to talk like Paul Laurence
Dunbar’s dialect poems to prove I’m Black. I don’t appreciate anyone’s trying to
take away the range of person I can be.
“Nevertheless, I’ve always loved those folks who have mastered the art
of manipulating words. Eloquent oratory and masterful writing have
stimulated my mind for as long as I can remember.”

“Talkin’ white” implies that the English language is a closed system owned 7
exclusively by whites. But my white friends from Chattanooga, Ventura, Califor-
nia, and New York City don’t all speak the same way. Nor do the millions of poor
whites working below the poverty line “talk white,” as that phrase is interpreted.
But the primary reason I question this peculiar euphemism for “speaking well” 8
is that it has been used tyrannically to push to the periphery of the race people who
grew up in the West Indies and attended English schools or who lived in predomi-
nantly white environments: They are perceived as not being Black enough, or as
somehow being anti-Black.
It hurts to know that many people judge me and others on whether or not we 9
break verbs. If we follow this line of thought, maybe we’ll also say that W. E. B.
DuBois wasn’t Black because he matriculated• at Harvard and studied at the
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Part 4 Readings for Writing

University of Berlin. Or perhaps that Alain Leroy Locke wasn’t Black because he
earned a degree from Oxford University. Or, to transfer the logic, maybe we’re not
all of African descent since we don’t speak Swahili and some “real” Africans do.
If we can take pride in the visual diversity of the race, then surely we can 10
transfer this diversity and appreciation to spoken English. Because all of us don’t
be talkin’ alike—ya know what I’m sayin’?

READING COMPREHENSION QUESTIONS


1. The word curious in “I received a curious look when I replied, with pride,
‘Harlem’” (paragraph 1) means
a. insulting.
b. questioning.
c. shocked.
d. annoyed.
2. The word impotent in “Being criticized made me feel marginal—and verbally
impotent in the sense that I had little ammunition to stop the frequent lunch-
time attacks” means
a. ineffective.
b. witty.
c. nonviolent.
d. weak.
3. Which sentence best describes the central idea of the selection?
a. It is disrespectful to speak a language that goes against the common lan-
guage of your community.
b. The phrase “talkin’ white” makes assumptions about what it means to be
“black.”
c. When a black person speaks grammatically correct English, it means that
the person is trying to deny his or her true race.
d. In order to be identified as “white,” one should speak grammatically cor-
rect English.
4. Which sentence best expresses the main idea of paragraphs 3 and 4?
a. Aponte alienated his black community by refusing to speak proper English.
b. Aponte always felt bothered by the fact that he was never accepted as being
fully “black” for speaking grammatically correct English.
c. Aponte alienated the white community by refusing to speak proper English.
d. Speaking grammatically correct English was not Aponte’s natural way of
speaking; he spoke this way because he wanted to feel like he belonged.
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Sentence Skills with Readings, Fifth Edition P a g e | 108

Talkin’ White

5. Which sentence best expresses the main idea of paragraphs 6 and 7?


a. Feeling so alienated from his black community, the author decided to hide
his true “speaking self” by using only slang.
b. The author became so self-conscious of his “speaking self” that he resorted
to writing poetry as a way to express his feelings about being black.
c. The author learned to take pride in his true “speaking self” and used lan-
guage to his advantage.
d. The author believes that there is no such thing as a true “speaking self” and
that one’s race determines one’s language.
6. One of the most challenging things for Aponte while growing up in Harlem was
a. learning to speak the local slang.
b. learning to speak grammatically correct English.
c. learning how to fit in, despite his language.
d. learning how to recognize when to alter his speaking behavior.
7. To defend against the jokes that made him feel like he was doing something
wrong for speaking the way he did, Aponte
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a. engaged in a lot of verbal fights.


b. learned several languages to emphasize the fact that he was different.
c. began to speak the way his peers spoke in order to earn their respect and to
fit-in.
d. avoided the situation altogether and focused his time on his writing.
8. Aponte finds the phrase “talkin’ white” to be
a. a condemnation of individuals who choose not to speak slang or improper
English in order to prove their “blackness.”
b. an accurate synonym for “speaking well.”
c. relevant only to white individuals in various parts of the country who speak
their own dialect of English.
d. a euphemism for well educated and elite.
9. When Aponte criticizes the phrase “talkin’ white” as a euphemism for “speak-
ing well,” he is suggesting that
a. you will be more respected by your peers only if you speak and behave as
a white person.
b. only whites can speak English properly.
c. all black people will be pushed to the fringes of society strictly for their
language habits.
d. all people who do not speak English properly will be pushed to the fringes
of society.
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Part 4 Readings for Writing

10. In the final paragraph, Aponte implies that


a. there is no true acceptance of racial diversity in the United States.
b. race has nothing to do with language.
c. we are being hypocritical if we can accept one another for the color of our
skin but not for the color of our spoken English.
d. language has no color.

TECHNIQUE QUESTIONS
1. Aponte uses flashbacks in his essay to help the reader experience the impact
that speaking grammatically correct English has had on his life. Select one of
those flashbacks and list the words he uses to draw you into the scene with
him. Are these action words, description words, or both? Is his choice of words
effective? Why or why not?

2. In paragraph 6, the author introduces the phrase “speaking self.” Why do you
think he introduces it at this point in the essay, as opposed to the beginning or
the conclusion? What is the context for the introduction of this phrase?

3. Aponte references several black scholars throughout his essay. List those
scholars below. What point is the author trying to make by referencing them?
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Talkin’ White

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS
1. The focus in this essay is as much about language as it is about fitting in. As
Aponte writes, “When I was a child, my reaction to the question ‘Why do
you talk so white?’ was to alter my spoken English drastically (once ‘Ask yo
mama’ became less effective and after I ran out of money for candy bribes to
make the kids like me). Like most children, I wanted to be liked and wanted to
blend into each new social circle.” Can you recall a time when you altered your
language, or some other aspect of yourself, to fit in? What did you do? Do you
think your actions were effective?
2. The author’s phrase “speaking self” is very much about staying true to who
you are and speaking the English language that comes naturally to you. Do you
agree or disagree with this statement? What other “selves” can you think of to
which you feel that people should stay true?
3. Aponte talks about being judged for the way he spoke English; can you think
of a time when you felt you were being judged for something you could not
help? How did you feel, and what did you do in response to this judgment?
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WRITING ASSIGNMENTS
1. In paragraph 4, Aponte writes, “I never could quite understand how talking
slang proved I was Black. Nor did I understand why I couldn’t be accepted
as a full-fledged, card-holding member of my group by speaking my natural
way.” Do you use slang when you speak? If so, in what context(s) do you use
it and how are you treated when you do speak slang? When you use slang, do
you feel that you are more or less a part of your culture, race, or community?
Write a paragraph in which you describe one incident when you did not use the
language of your group or community and how people reacted to you. Include
specific examples of expressions you used, as Aponte does in his essay. Make
sure you include a clear topic sentence and concrete details to help your reader
experience what you experienced.
2. Aponte introduces several main ideas in his essay. Following are statements
for some of those main ideas:
• Some people use the phrase “talkin’ white” as a synonym for “speaking
well.”
• Racial and cultural groups define themselves by the type of English they
speak.
• People who speak grammatically correct English are sometimes looked
down upon by certain segments of society.
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Part 4 Readings for Writing

Pick one of these main idea statements and write an essay that either agrees
or disagrees with the claim that is being made. Start by creating an outline to
guide your writing. For each paragraph, remember to include a topic sentence,
supporting details, and concrete examples. Be sure to include transition state-
ments in between your paragraphs, as well.
3. In paragraph 6, Aponte writes, “There are various shades of Blackness; I don’t
have to talk like Paul Laurence Dunbar’s dialect poems to prove I’m Black. I
don’t appreciate anyone’s trying to take away the range of person I can be.”
What does the author mean by “various shades of Blackness”? Reread the
essay and write a paragraph about a time during which you, too, felt you had
to prove you belonged to a certain group—whether it was your racial group,
cultural group, social group, or other group. Be sure to include a clear topic
sentence and specific examples to demonstrate how the shades of your larger
racial, cultural, or social identity can be varied yet accepted.
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Do It Better!

Do It Better!
Ben Carson, M.D., with Cecil Murphey

PREVIEW

If you suspect that you are now as “smart” as you’ll ever be, then read the
following selection, taken from the book Think Big. It is about Dr. Ben Carson,
who was sure he was “the dumbest kid in the class” in school. Carson tells
how he turned his life around from what was a sure path to failure. Today he
is a famous neurosurgeon at Johns Hopkins University Hospital in Baltimore,
Maryland.

WORDS TO WATCH

inasmuch as (13): since


Copyright © 2014 McGraw-Hill, a business unit of The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc. All rights reserved.

potential (18): capacity for development and progress


solely (20): alone
rebellious (46): resisting authority
indifferent (58): uninterested
startled (75): surprised
astonished (81): surprised

“Benjamin, is this your report card?” my mother asked as she picked up the 1
folded white card from the table.
“Uh, yeah,” I said, trying to sound casual. Too ashamed to hand it to her, I had 2
dropped it on the table, hoping that she wouldn’t notice until after I went to bed.
It was the first report card I had received from Higgins Elementary School 3
since we had moved back from Boston to Detroit, only a few months earlier.
I had been in the fifth grade not even two weeks before everyone considered 4
me the dumbest kid in the class and frequently made jokes about me. Before long
I too began to feel as though I really was the most stupid kid in fifth grade. Despite
Mother’s frequently saying, “You’re smart, Bennie. You can do anything you want
to do,” I did not believe her.
No one else in school thought I was smart, either. 5
Now, as Mother examined my report card, she asked, “What’s this grade in 6
reading?” (Her tone of voice told me that I was in trouble.) Although I was embar-
rassed, I did not think too much about it. Mother knew that I wasn’t doing well in
math, but she did not know I was doing so poorly in every subject.
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Part 4 Readings for Writing

While she slowly read my report card, reading everything one word at a time, I 7
hurried into my room and started to get ready for bed. A few minutes later, Mother
came into my bedroom.
“Benjamin,” she said, “are these your grades?” She held the card in front of me 8
as if I hadn’t seen it before.
“Oh, yeah, but you know, it doesn’t mean much.” 9
“No, that’s not true, Bennie. It means a lot.” 10
“Just a report card.” 11
“But it’s more than that.” 12
Knowing I was in for it now, I prepared to listen, yet I was not all that inter- 13
ested. I did not like school very much and there was no reason why I should. Inas-
much as• I was the dumbest kid in the class, what did I have to look forward to?
The others laughed at me and made jokes about me every day.
“Education is the only way you’re ever going to escape poverty,” she said. 14
“It’s the only way you’re ever going to get ahead in life and be successful. Do you
understand that?”
“Yes, Mother,” I mumbled. 15
“If you keep on getting these kinds of grades you’re going to spend the rest of 16
your life on skid row, or at best sweeping floors in a factory. That’s not the kind of
life that I want for you. That’s not the kind of life that God wants for you.”
I hung my head, genuinely ashamed. My mother had been raising me and my 17
older brother, Curtis, by herself. Having only a third-grade education herself, she
knew the value of what she did not have. Daily she drummed into Curtis and me
that we had to do our best in school.
“You’re just not living up to your potential•,” she said. “I’ve got two mighty 18
smart boys and I know they can do better.”
I had done my best—at least I had when I first started at Higgins Elementary 19
School. How could I do much when I did not understand anything going on in our
class?
In Boston we had attended a parochial school, but I hadn’t learned much be- 20
cause of a teacher who seemed more interested in talking to another female teacher
than in teaching us. Possibly, this teacher was not solely• to blame—perhaps I
wasn’t emotionally able to learn much. My parents had separated just before we
went to Boston, when I was eight years old. I loved both my mother and my father
and went through considerable trauma over their separating. For months afterward,
I kept thinking that my parents would get back together, that my daddy would
come home again the way he used to, and that we could be the same old family
again—but he never came back. Consequently, we moved to Boston and lived with
Aunt Jean and Uncle William Avery in a tenement building for two years until
Mother had saved enough money to bring us back to Detroit.
Mother kept shaking the report card at me as she sat on the side of my bed. 21
“You have to work harder. You have to use that good brain that God gave you, Ben-
nie. Do you understand that?”
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Sentence Skills with Readings, Fifth Edition P a g e | 114

Do It Better!

“Yes, Mother.” Each time she paused, I would dutifully say those words. 22
“I work among rich people, people who are educated,” she said. “I watch how 23
they act, and I know they can do anything they want to do. And so can you.” She
put her arm on my shoulder. “Bennie, you can do anything they can do—only you
can do it better!”
Mother had said those words before. Often. At the time, they did not mean 24
much to me. Why should they? I really believed that I was the dumbest kid in fifth
grade, but of course, I never told her that.
“I just don’t know what to do about you boys,” she said. “I’m going to talk to 25
God about you and Curtis.” She paused, stared into space, then said (more to her-
self than to me), “I need the Lord’s guidance on what to do. You just can’t bring in
any more report cards like this.”
As far as I was concerned, the report card matter was over. 26
The next day was like the previous ones—just another bad day in school, an- 27
other day of being laughed at because I did not get a single problem right in arith-
metic and couldn’t get any words right on the spelling test. As soon as I came home
from school, I changed into play clothes and ran outside. Most of the boys my age
played softball, or the game I liked best, “Tip the Top.”
We played Tip the Top by placing a bottle cap on one of the sidewalk cracks. 28
Copyright © 2014 McGraw-Hill, a business unit of The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc. All rights reserved.

Then taking a ball—any kind that bounced—we’d stand on a line and take turns
throwing the ball at the bottle top, trying to flip it over. Whoever succeeded got
two points. If anyone actually moved the cap more than a few inches, he won five
points. Ten points came if he flipped it into the air and it landed on the other side.
When it grew dark or we got tired, Curtis and I would finally go inside and 29
watch TV. The set stayed on until we went to bed. Because Mother worked long
hours, she was never home until just before we went to bed. Sometimes I would
awaken when I heard her unlocking the door.
Two evenings after the incident with the report card, Mother came home about 30
an hour before our bedtime. Curtis and I were sprawled out, watching TV. She
walked across the room, snapped off the set, and faced both of us. “Boys,” she said,
“you’re wasting too much of your time in front of that television. You don’t get an
education from staring at television all the time.”
Before either of us could make a protest, she told us that she had been praying 31
for wisdom. “The Lord’s told me what to do,” she said. “So from now on, you will
not watch television, except for two preselected programs each week.”
“Just two programs?” I could hardly believe she would say such a terrible 32
thing. “That’s not—”
“And only after you’ve done your homework. Furthermore, you don’t play 33
outside after school, either, until you’ve done all your homework.”
“Everybody else plays outside right after school,” I said, unable to think of 34
anything except how bad it would be if I couldn’t play with my friends. “I won’t
have any friends if I stay in the house all the time—”
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“That may be,” Mother said, “but everybody else is not going to be as success- 35
ful as you are—”
“But, Mother—” 36
“This is what we’re going to do. I asked God for wisdom, and this is the answer 37
I got.”
I tried to offer several other arguments, but Mother was firm. I glanced at 38
Curtis, expecting him to speak up, but he did not say anything. He lay on the floor,
staring at his feet.
“Don’t worry about everybody else. The whole world is full of ‘everybody 39
else,’ you know that? But only a few make a significant achievement.”
The loss of TV and play time was bad enough. I got up off the floor, feeling as 40
if everything was against me. Mother wasn’t going to let me play with my friends,
and there would be no more television—almost none, anyway. She was stopping
me from having any fun in life.
“And that isn’t all,” she said. “Come back, Bennie.” 41
I turned around, wondering what else there could be. 42
“In addition,” she said, “to doing your homework, you have to read two books 43
from the library each week. Every single week.”
“Two books? Two?” Even though I was in fifth grade, I had never read a whole 44
book in my life.
“Yes, two. When you finish reading them, you must write me a book report 45
just like you do at school. You’re not living up to your potential, so I’m going to
see that you do.”
Usually Curtis, who was two years older, was the more rebellious•. But this 46
time he seemed to grasp the wisdom of what Mother said. He did not say one word.
She stared at Curtis. “You understand?” 47
He nodded. 48
“Bennie, is it clear?” 49
“Yes, Mother.” I agreed to do what Mother told me—it wouldn’t have occurred 50
to me not to obey—but I did not like it. Mother was being unfair and demanding
more of us than other parents did.
The following day was Thursday. After school, Curtis and I walked to the local 51
branch of the library. I did not like it much, but then I had not spent that much time
in any library.
We both wandered around a little in the children’s section, not having any idea 52
about how to select books or which books we wanted to check out.
The librarian came over to us and asked if she could help. We explained that 53
both of us wanted to check out two books.
“What kind of books would you like to read?” the librarian asked. 54
“Animals,” I said after thinking about it. “Something about animals.” 55
“I’m sure we have several that you’d like.” She led me over to a section of 56
books. She left me and guided Curtis to another section of the room. I flipped
through the row of books until I found two that looked easy enough for me to read.
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One of them, Chip, the Dam Builder—about a beaver—was the first one I had ever
checked out. As soon as I got home, I started to read it. It was the first book I ever
read all the way through even though it took me two nights. Reluctantly I admitted
afterward to Mother that I really had liked reading about Chip.
Within a month I could find my way around the children’s section like some- 57
one who had gone there all his life. By then the library staff knew Curtis and me
and the kind of books we chose. They often made suggestions. “Here’s a delightful
book about a squirrel,” I remember one of them telling me.
As she told me part of the story, I tried to appear indifferent•, but as soon as 58
she handed it to me, I opened the book and started to read.
Best of all, we became favorites of the librarians. When new books came in 59
that they thought either of us would enjoy, they held them for us. Soon I became
fascinated as I realized that the library had so many books—and about so many
different subjects.
After the book about the beaver, I chose others about animals—all types of 60
animals. I read every animal story I could get my hands on. I read books about
wolves, wild dogs, several about squirrels, and a variety of animals that lived in
other countries. Once I had gone through the animal books, I started reading about
plants, then minerals, and finally rocks.
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My reading books about rocks was the first time the information ever became 61
practical to me. We lived near the railroad tracks, and when Curtis and I took the
route to school that crossed by the tracks, I began paying attention to the crushed
rock that I noticed between the ties.
As I continued to read more about rocks, I would walk along the tracks, search- 62
ing for different kinds of stones, and then see if I could identify them.
Often I would take a book with me to make sure that I had labeled each stone 63
correctly.
“Agate,” I said as I threw the stone. Curtis got tired of my picking up stones 64
and identifying them, but I did not care because I kept finding new stones all the
time. Soon it became my favorite game to walk along the tracks and identify the
varieties of stones. Although I did not realize it, within a very short period of time,
I was actually becoming an expert on rocks.
“That day—for the first time—I realized that Mother had been right. Reading
is the way out of ignorance, and the road to achievement. I did not have to be
the class dummy anymore.”

Two things happened in the second half of fifth grade that convinced me of the 65
importance of reading books.
First, our teacher, Mrs. Williamson, had a spelling bee every Friday afternoon. 66
We’d go through all the words we’d had so far that year. Sometimes she also called
out words that we were supposed to have learned in fourth grade. Without fail, I
always went down on the first word.
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One Friday, though, Bobby Farmer, whom everyone acknowledged as the 67


smartest kid in our class, had to spell “agriculture” as his final word. As soon as the
teacher pronounced his word, I thought, I can spell that word. Just the day before,
I had learned it from reading one of my library books. I spelled it under my breath,
and it was just the way Bobby spelled it.
If I can spell “agriculture,” I’ll bet I can learn to spell any other word in the 68
world. I’ll bet I can learn to spell better than Bobby Farmer.
Just that single word, “agriculture,” was enough to give me hope. 69
The following week, a second thing happened that forever changed my life. 70
When Mr. Jaeck, the science teacher, was teaching us about volcanoes, he held up
an object that looked like a piece of black, glass-like rock. “Does anybody know
what this is? What does it have to do with volcanoes?”
Immediately, because of my reading, I recognized the stone. I waited, but none 71
of my classmates raised their hands. I thought, This is strange. Not even the smart
kids are raising their hands. I raised my hand.
“Yes, Benjamin,” he said. 72
I heard snickers around me. The other kids probably thought it was a joke, or 73
that I was going to say something stupid.
“Obsidian,” I said. 74

“That’s right!” He tried not to look startled , but it was obvious he hadn’t 75
expected me to give the correct answer.
“That’s obsidian,” I said, “and it’s formed by the supercooling of lava when it 76
hits the water.” Once I had their attention and realized I knew information no other
student had learned, I began to tell them everything I knew about the subject of
obsidian, lava, lava flow, supercooling, and compacting of the elements.
When I finally paused, a voice behind me whispered, “Is that Bennie Carson?” 77
“You’re absolutely correct,” Mr. Jaeck said, and he smiled at me. If he had an- 78
nounced that I’d won a million-dollar lottery, I couldn’t have been more pleased
and excited.
“Benjamin, that’s absolutely, absolutely right,” he repeated with enthusiasm 79
in his voice. He turned to the others and said, “That is wonderful! Class, this is a
tremendous piece of information Benjamin has just given us. I’m very proud to
hear him say this.”
For a few moments, I tasted the thrill of achievement. I recall thinking, Wow, 80
look at them. They’re all looking at me with admiration. Me, the dummy! The one
everybody thinks is stupid. They’re looking at me to see if this is really me speaking.
Maybe, though, it was I who was the most astonished• one in the class. Although 81
I had been reading two books a week because Mother told me to, I had not realized
how much knowledge I was accumulating. True, I had learned to enjoy reading, but
until then I hadn’t realized how it connected with my schoolwork. That day—for the
first time—I realized that Mother had been right. Reading is the way out of igno-
rance, and the road to achievement. I did not have to be the class dummy anymore.
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For the next few days, I felt like a hero at school. The jokes about me stopped. 82
The kids started to listen to me. I’m starting to have fun with this stuff.
As my grades improved in every subject, I asked myself, “Ben, is there any rea- 83
son you can’t be the smartest kid in the class? If you can learn about obsidian, you
can learn about social studies and geography and math and science and everything.”
That single moment of triumph pushed me to want to read more. From then 84
on, it was as though I could not read enough books. Whenever anyone looked for
me after school, they could usually find me in my bedroom—curled up, reading a
library book—for a long time, the only thing I wanted to do. I had stopped caring
about the TV programs I was missing; I no longer cared about playing Tip the Top
or baseball anymore. I just wanted to read.
In a year and a half—by the middle of sixth grade—I had moved to the top of 85
the class.

READING COMPREHENSION QUESTIONS


1. The word trauma in “I loved both my mother and my father and went through
considerable trauma over their separating. For months afterward, I kept think-
Copyright © 2014 McGraw-Hill, a business unit of The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc. All rights reserved.

ing that my parents would get back together, . . . but he never came back”
(paragraph 20) means
a. love.
b. knowledge.
c. distance.
d. suffering.
2. The word acknowledged in “One Friday, though, Bobby Farmer, whom every-
one acknowledged as the smartest kid in our class, had to spell ‘agriculture’ as
his final word” (paragraph 67) means
a. denied.
b. recognized.
c. forgot.
d. interrupted.
3. Which sentence best expresses the central idea of the selection?
a. Children who grow up in single-parent homes may spend large amounts of
time home alone.
b. Because of parental guidance that led to a love of reading, the author was
able to go from academic failure to success.
c. Parents should stay committed to their marriage when their children are
young.
d. Today’s young people watch too much television day after day.
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4. Which sentence best expresses the main idea of paragraph 56?


a. Bennie’s first experience with a library book was positive.
b. The first book that Bennie ever checked out at a library was about a beaver.
c. The librarian was very helpful to Bennie and Curtis.
d. At first, Bennie could not read most of the animal books at the library.
5. Which sentence best expresses the main idea of paragraphs 61–64?
a. Books about rocks gave the author his first practical benefits from reading.
b. Curtis took little interest in what his brother had learned about rocks.
c. The author found a piece of agate by the railroad tracks.
d. Studying rocks can be a fascinating experience.
6. In Boston, Bennie
a. had an excellent teacher.
b. attended a public school.
c. longed for his parents to get together again.
d. lived with his father in a tenement building.
7. To get her sons to do better in school, Mrs. Carson insisted that they
a. watch educational TV.
b. finish their homework before playing.
c. read one library book every month.
d. all of the above.
8. We can conclude that Mrs. Carson believed
a. education leads to success.
b. her sons needed to be forced to live up to their potential.
c. socializing was less important to her sons than a good education.
d. all of the above.
9. We can infer that Bennie Carson believed he was dumb because
a. in Boston he had gotten behind in school.
b. other students laughed at him.
c. he had done his best when he first started at Higgins Elementary School,
but he still got poor grades.
d. all of the above.
10. From paragraphs 70–80, we can infer that
a. Bennie thought his classmates were stupid because they did not know
about obsidian.
b. Mr. Jaeck knew less about rocks than Bennie did.
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c. this was the first time Bennie had answered a difficult question correctly in
class.
d. Mr. Jaeck thought that Bennie had taken too much class time explaining
about obsidian.

TECHNIQUE QUESTIONS
1. Instead of pausing to describe Bennie’s mother, the author reveals her char-
acter through the specific details of her actions and words. For example, what
does paragraph 25 tell us about Mrs. Carson?

2. What is the main order in which the details of this reading are organized—time
order or listing order? Locate and write down three of the many transitions that
Copyright © 2014 McGraw-Hill, a business unit of The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc. All rights reserved.

are used as part of that order.

3. The author states in paragraph 65, “Two things happened in the second half
of fifth grade that convinced me of the importance of reading books.” In para-
graph 66, the first of those two events is introduced with a listing transition.
In paragraph 70, the second event is introduced with another listing transition.
Write those two transitions on the lines below.
______________________ ______________________

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS
1. The author recalls his failure in the classroom as an eight-year-old child by
writing “Perhaps I wasn’t emotionally able to learn much.” Why does he make
this statement? In general, what things in a child’s home or social life might
interfere with his or her education?
2. Part of Mrs. Carson’s plan for helping her sons do better in school was limiting
them to two television shows a week. How much of a role do you think this
limit played in the success of her plan? Do you agree with her that unrestricted
television can be harmful to children? Explain.
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3. Reading on a regular basis helped turn Carson’s life around. Think about your
daily schedule. If you were to do regular reading, where in your day could you
find time to relax for half an hour and just read? What would you choose to
read? How do you think you might benefit from becoming a regular reader?

WRITING ASSIGNMENTS
1. The reading tells about some of Carson’s key school experiences, both positive
and negative. Write a paragraph about one of your key experiences in school.
Use concrete details—actions, comments, reactions, and so on—to help your
readers picture what happened. (To see how Carson used details to bring class-
room scenes to life, look at paragraphs 65–82.)
To select an event to write about, try asking yourself the following questions:
• Which teachers or events in school influenced how I felt about myself?
• What specific incidents stand out in my mind as I think back to elementary
school?
Once you know which experience you’ll write about, use freewriting to
help you remember and record the details. Here is one student’s freewriting for
this assignment:
In second grade, Richard L. sat next to me. A really good artist. He would
draw something, and it really looked like something. He was so good at choos-
ing colors. Good at crayons, good at water paint. His pictures were always
picked by teacher. They were shown on bulletin board. I remember his drawing
of a circus and acrobats and animals and clowns. Many colors and details. I
felt pretty bad in art. But I loved it and couldn’t wait for art in class. One day the
teacher read a story about a boy who looked at the mountains and wondered
what was on the other side, the mountains were huge, dark. After the reading
the teacher said “Paint something from the story.” I painted those mountains,
big purple brown mountains. Watercolor dripped to show slopes and a colored
sunset, at the top of the picture a thin slice of blue sky. Next day I sat down in
my desk in the morning. Then I saw my picture was on the bulletin board! Later
teacher passed by me and put a hand on my shoulder and whispered good job,
lovely picture. Made me feel really proud. The feeling lasted a long time.

After the details of the experience are on paper, you will be free to concen-
trate on a more carefully constructed version of the event. The author of the
freewriting above, for instance, needed to think of a topic sentence. So when
writing the first draft, she began with this sentence: “A seemingly small experi-
ence in elementary school encouraged me greatly.” Writing drafts is also the
time to add any persuasive details you may have missed at first. When working
on her second draft, the author of the above added at the end. “I felt very proud,
which gave me confidence to work harder in all my school subjects.”
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Before writing out your final version, remember to check for grammar,
punctuation, and spelling errors.
2. Reading helped Bennie, and it can do a lot for adults, too. Most of us, however,
don’t have someone around to insist that we do a certain amount of personal
reading every week. In addition, many of us don’t have the amount of free time
that Bennie and Curtis had. How can adults find time to read more? Write a
paragraph listing several ways adults can add more reading to their lives.
A good prewriting strategy for this assignment is making a list. Simply
write out as many ways as you can think of. Don’t worry about putting them
in any special order. You will select and organize the strategies you wish to
include in your paper after accumulating as many ideas as you can. Here is an
example of a prewriting list for this paper:

Ways adults can increase the amount of time they spend reading:
on the bus to and from work/school
while eating breakfast
instead of watching some TV
choose motivating materials (articles, books about hobbies, problems, etc.)
Copyright © 2014 McGraw-Hill, a business unit of The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc. All rights reserved.

Feel free to use items from this list, but add at least one or two of your own
points to include in your paper.
3. “Do It Better!” suggests that television can interfere with children’s academic
progress. Write a paragraph on what you believe is another unfortunate ef-
fect of television. You may feel that television includes too much violence,
that TV advertising encourages children to want to buy too much, or that TV
sitcoms promote poor family values. After deciding what effect you wish to
write about, make a list of possible points of support. You may find it helpful
to spend a few sessions in front of the TV with a notebook. Following, for
instance, is part of a list of notes that can be used to support the point “TV
advertising promotes poor nutrition.”

During kids’ cartoon show:


In a sugary chocolate cereal, marshmallow ghosts appear once milk is added.
Children are pictured enjoying these ghosts’ appearances and loving the cereal.
Chocolate-dipped cookies are included in boxes of another chocolate cereal.
Appealing cartoon characters invite children to look for these boxes.

During talk show:


Ad for soda (empty calories) shows symbols of Christmas, making the soda
seem like a healthy holiday drink.
An ad for corn chips (high fat) shows happy, healthy faces finishing a huge
bowl of the chips.
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Lost Years, Found Dreams


Regina Ruiz

PREVIEW

Divorced, far from home, with three children, not very fluent in English—
Regina Ruiz could easily have become a sad statistic, a woman sunk in de-
spair after a failed marriage. But Ruiz decided she had given up enough
years of her life; she would reclaim the rest. Her story is hardly a fairy tale
with a magical happy ending. But it is perhaps even better; it is the story of a
courageous, life-loving commitment to a new and meaningful future.

WORDS TO WATCH

regal (2): royal


haze (3): confused state of mind
intervened (7): came in to change a situation
bleak (8): not hopeful
bleary-eyed (18): with blurry vision
preoccupation (18): extreme concern with something
Morpheus (20): the god of dreams in Greek mythology

I feel funny. So very funny, telling you about my life, my feelings, my secrets. 1
I do not know how to welcome you into my heart and soul. You see, nobody ever
asked me what I thought or how I felt about life’s challenges. Or, maybe, nobody
ever really cared about what I thought.
My journey to Burlington County College began many years ago in Caracas, 2
Venezuela, where I was born and grew to be a young lady full of energy and life.
My parents called me Regina because there was something regal• about the sound.
They had high hopes of my marrying a local boy from a good, wealthy family. You
know the kind—slick, black hair, long sideburns, driving a sports car. The kind
who brings you flowers on every date and swears his undying love for you three
days a week, and the other days he is sleeping with Maria, the local social worker.
To get even, or because I was in a romantic haze,• I met and married a U.S. 3
Marine from Des Moines, Iowa, who was stationed at our local embassy, where I
also worked.
Marriage, a home in America, and three beautiful children occupied twenty- 4
five years of my life.
Where did my life go? It went somewhere. But there is no lost-and-found 5
department for lost years.
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Lost Years, Found Dreams

The marriage was bad. It was so bad that I cried every night for all those years. 6
I would tell myself, “You are in a strange country—maybe the customs are differ-
ent. The children need you, and you cannot admit failure to your parents back in
Venezuela.”
As luck would have it, fate intervened.• My ex-Marine husband found some- 7
one new and left me and the children with no money, very hurt and depressed.
I quickly took an inventory—foreign-born, with not a great command of the 8
English language, no money, no job training, and two kids in college. The future
looked bleak.•
But it did not stop. My father died. I loved him so much, and he was always my 9
source of strength in need. Mother became ill.
I felt very hurt, lonely, angry, and very sorry for myself. 10
However, I remembered a saying my Dad would quote to me when things were 11
going wrong and the future looked black. He may have gotten this quotation from
the Spanish edition of Reader’s Digest. He would say, “My dear, it is always the
darkest when you are fresh out of matches.”
“Dad, I am out of matches.” Or so I thought. 12
I decided to make my life something worthwhile by helping people. I wanted 13
to help and heal and maybe, at the same time, heal myself.
Copyright © 2014 McGraw-Hill, a business unit of The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc. All rights reserved.

I appeared before the college doors with my knees shaking and full of doubt. 14
I wanted to be a nurse.
I enrolled in college. I was proud of myself for not falling into the garbage pit 15
waiting so close by.
Then the fun began—subjects which were very hard for me. 16
In order to survive, I managed to get two jobs to keep up with house payments 17
and food. The kids found college money by working and by appealing to their fa-
ther. I met my challenges on a daily basis.
Now, my days are very active and long. Before the sun makes its appearance, 18
I stumble bleary-eyed• to the shower and afterward select the day’s outfit. After a
quick check in the mirror, I make my way downstairs to prepare a quick breakfast
along with my lunch, feed the cat (who happens to be my alarm clock), and do
what seem like a million other small chores. Then I drive for forty-five minutes to
the Pemberton Campus, while studying my chemistry key notes on index cards be-
fore a test. I do this with tears in my eyes. You see, at the same time I am worrying
about the situation with my water heater that slowly but surely is leaking and may
not last until the new one can be installed. In addition, I am anxious to schedule
my exterminator’s visit to treat the termites discovered in my basement. My preoc-
cupation• with such household woes is due to a canceled appointment to have my
furnace cleaned, which resulted in a periodic spray of soot.
After a hectic morning of classes, I rush to my car for a hurried thirty-minute 19
ride to the office, where a desk piled high with import documents is waiting for
me, along with innumerable phone calls from the brokers, customs officials,
and suppliers. Meanwhile, an impatient boss wants to know the precise location
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of one of the fifty containers traveling between eastern Europe and Burlington,
New Jersey.
As the clock winds toward 5 P.M., I get ready to travel back to the Cinnamin- 20
son Campus for another round of classes. As I arrive on campus, I waste another
thirty minutes searching for that nonexistent parking spot. My class continues until
ten o’clock in the evening, and I praise the Lord it doesn’t last longer. By that time,
I am beginning to see double. I slowly make my way to the car and begin the long
commute home, counting in my mind how many customers I will see as a result
of my second job—hairdressing. On evenings when I have no classes scheduled, I
take appointments to cut hair or give permanents. As I arrive home, I find a hungry
son and starving cat, both waiting to be fed. I usually cook something simple for
us, then proceed to do the few dishes because I hate the thought of adding one more
chore to my early-morning schedule. By the time I finish getting ready for bed, it
is midnight; I look up and see the stairway leading to the bedroom, which by then
seems longer than the one outside the Philadelphia Museum of Art, and proceed to
crawl in bed and into the arms of Morpheus.•
“I decided to make my life something worthwhile by helping people. I wanted
to help and heal and maybe, at the same time, heal myself.”

On many nights, I do not stay there long. At 3 A.M., maybe 4 A.M., my eyes 21
pop open. The thought, “Am I ready for the test? Do I understand the material?”
makes me sit upright in a panic. Rather than toss and turn uneasily for the rest of
the night, I get out of bed and open my textbooks for a couple of hours. If fatigue
finally wins, I may fall back into bed before getting up for the day.
Without long luxurious stretches of time to study, I must constantly search out 22
such little windows of opportunity to prepare for class. When the laundry is wash-
ing, I study. While supper is simmering on the stove, I study. When a customer
cancels her appointment for a haircut, I thank the Lord for a free hour, and I study.
“Mom, if I studied half as hard as you, I’d be a straight-A student,” says my son.
But he understands that the life of a working mother is not designed to make going
to college easy. If I do not budget my time carefully, I will fail.
People question the wisdom of my studying to be a nurse. It may take four or 23
five years.
“You will never last,” they tell me. 24
“You will be too old to lift a bedpan,” they mock. 25
But I am not discouraged. There are twenty more courses ahead of me before I 26
get into the nursing area. While all these things challenge me, the greatest of all is
to be able to hold my head high.
Somehow, just somehow, I think it might be all worth it—if I can hold the hand 27
of someone dying all alone in a cold hospital ward and whisper in the patient’s ear,
“You are not alone, I am here, I am here, I will never leave you.”
Maybe, just maybe, I will find that life that was lost. It is out there somewhere. 28
But I know one thing—I am in charge, and I will never let go again. Never. 29
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Lost Years, Found Dreams

An Update
Regina Ruiz successfully completed her registered nurse degree and is only a 30
few credits away from earning her bachelor’s degree at Jefferson University in
Philadelphia. She is a nurse at Voorhees Pediatric Rehabilitation Hospital in
New Jersey.
At the hospital, Regina’s patients range in age from newborns to eighteen- 31
year-olds. As she grows attached to particular patients, she requests that they be
assigned to her daily shift, giving “extra love” to children battling illness, fear, and
loneliness. “To see tiny preemies and children who are so sick grow and get better
and be released to their families—it is wonderful to be part of that. School was
very difficult, and nursing is a demanding profession, but when I am at work I am
in heaven.”
When she is not working, she takes pride in keeping her home beautiful. “After 32
my divorce and through all those long difficult years, I worried so much about not
being able to keep up with things,” she said. “The roof leaked so badly at one point
I had trash cans sitting in the living room. So I had to learn to budget my money as
well as my time. When I had three jobs, one was for tuition and food, and the oth-
ers were for repairs—a roof, siding, new windows, everything. Now I can look at
Copyright © 2014 McGraw-Hill, a business unit of The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc. All rights reserved.

the house and feel so good. A little neighbor boy told me the other day, ‘Mrs. Ruiz,
you have the nicest house on the street.’”
She still does hair for a handful of longtime clients. “They were my friends 33
for so many years,” she said. “When I’d come home from a test crying because I
was sure I’d failed, they’d be the ones to say, ‘No, Regina! You’re going to make
it.’ Now, maybe I don’t have to cut hair anymore to earn a living,” she says with a
chuckle, “but how can I tell them to go jump in the lake?”

READING COMPREHENSION QUESTIONS


1. The words took an inventory in “I quickly took an inventory—foreign-born,
with not a great command of the English language, no money, no job training,
and two kids in college” (paragraph 8) mean
a. fell asleep.
b. made a detailed list.
c. formed a plan of action.
d. got a job.
2. The word appealing in “The kids found college money by working and by ap-
pealing to their father” (paragraph 17) means
a. pretending.
b. refusing.
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Part 4 Readings for Writing

c. suggesting an alternative.
d. making a request.
3. Which sentence best expresses the central idea of the selection?
a. Ruiz could not tell her parents back in Venezuela that her marriage was
unhappy.
b. Ruiz should not have married the Marine and moved so far from home.
c. After a bad marriage, Ruiz successfully took charge of her own life and
future.
d. Ruiz is often exhausted by her schedule of school and two jobs.
4. A main idea may cover more than one paragraph. Which sentence best ex-
presses the main idea of paragraphs 11–13?
a. Ruiz remembered a saying her father used to say.
b. Ruiz at first saw no way out of a bad situation but then thought of a worth-
while path.
c. Ruiz’s father may have gotten inspiration from the Spanish edition of
Reader’s Digest.
d. Ruiz thought helping people was a worthwhile goal.
5. Which sentence best expresses the main idea of paragraphs 21–22?
a. Ruiz never has time to study, so she goes to class unprepared.
b. Ruiz always chooses to sleep an extra hour or two rather than study for
class.
c. Ruiz values studying and uses every spare minute for schoolwork.
d. Because of her excess leisure time, Ruiz always has enough opportunity
for study.
6. Ruiz’s marriage ended when
a. she left her husband for another man.
b. she enrolled in college and her husband divorced her.
c. her husband left her for another woman.
d. Ruiz’s parents demanded that she come back to Venezuela.
7. According to the “Update,” Ruiz now works as a(n)
a. office worker and baby-sitter.
b. nurse and occasional hairdresser.
c. translator and cleaning woman.
d. parking lot attendant and veterinarian’s assistant.
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Lost Years, Found Dreams

8. We can infer that Ruiz


a. wishes she had married “a local boy from a good, wealthy family.”
b. believes she married the U.S. Marine too quickly.
c. regrets having three children.
d. believes enrolling in the nursing program was not wise.
9. We can infer that in the passage below the author uses the word matches to
refer to
a. heat.
b. solutions.
c. the love between a child and a parent.
d. something that will light a cigarette.
He would say, “My dear, it is always the darkest when you are fresh out of
matches.” “Dad, I am out of matches.” Or so I thought. (Paragraphs 11–12)
10. We can conclude one reason Ruiz wanted to become a nurse was that
a. she believed that helping other people would help her, too.
Copyright © 2014 McGraw-Hill, a business unit of The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc. All rights reserved.

b. Venezuela needed more nurses.


c. her father always wanted her to be a nurse.
d. nursing was the easiest course offered by the college she attended.

TECHNIQUE QUESTIONS
1. In paragraph 5, Regina asks the question “Where did my life go?” Where in
the essay does she return to the image of her “lost life”? Write here the number
of the paragraph in which she returns to this image: . What is the dif-
ference between how she discusses her lost life in paragraph 5 and in the later
paragraph?

2. Ruiz begins her essay by describing a series of disappointments and her result-
ing depression. Later, she describes her decision to make something good out
of her life and what her life has been like since then. In what paragraph of her
essay does she make the transition between those two sections, and what word
marks that transition?
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Part 4 Readings for Writing

3. Who wrote paragraphs 1–29 of the reading? Was the update written by the
same person? What evidence supports your answers to these questions?

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS
1. Ruiz stayed with an unhappy marriage for twenty-five years. During those
years, she told herself, “You are in a strange country—maybe the customs are
different. The children need you, and you cannot admit failure to your parents
back in Venezuela.” Judging from your own experience and observations of
people around you, are these typical reasons for remaining in an unhappy rela-
tionship? Are they good reasons?
2. Like Ruiz, adults who return to college often have a difficult time balancing
the demands of their work, family, and classes. What challenges do you face
as a student? What ways have you found to deal with them?
3. Ruiz briefly explains her decision to become a nurse. Why have you chosen
your own course of study? What about it interests you? What do you hope it
will offer you after college?

WRITING ASSIGNMENTS
1. Ruiz and her parents had very different ideas about whom she should marry.
How well have your plans for your life conformed to your parents’ hopes for
you? Write a paragraph about a decision in your life on which you and your
parents have either clashed or agreed. In your paragraph, include concrete de-
tails that show exactly what your parents had in mind and how they commu-
nicated their hopes to you. Also, explain clearly your decision and the reasons
for it. Here are some sample topic sentences for this assignment:
Although my parents urged me to become a teacher, I am studying to be a
veterinary assistant.
My parents did not want me to marry my high school girlfriend, and I sur-
prised them—and myself—by doing what they wanted.

2. In paragraph 18, Regina writes about her typical morning, from stumbling out
of bed to getting to and through school. She includes various specific details
about getting ready in the morning, studying for a test while driving to school,
and thinking about the “household woes” that plague her all the while. Do some
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Sentence Skills with Readings, Fifth Edition P a g e | 130

Lost Years, Found Dreams

freewriting or write a list of details you can use for a descriptive paragraph of
what a typical morning is like for you. After accumulating enough information
about a typical morning, think of a topic sentence that will cover all of the de-
tails you will write about. Here, for instance, is one possible topic sentence:
A typical morning in my life starts slowly before developing into some very
hectic but productive hours.
Before writing your final draft, double-check your topic sentence to see if
it still covers the details in your paragraph or if it needs adjusting. (Perhaps,
for example, you realize that your morning doesn’t start so slowly after all.)
Also, use a few time transitions to make the sequence of events clear to your
reader. You could write, for example, “First I hear my alarm go off at 6 A.M.
Then I take a shower, ending with a few seconds of ice-cold water to wake up
my body and my brain.”
3. Ruiz was proud of herself for taking control of her life and enrolling in college,
rather than getting stuck in depression and self-pity after her marriage ended.
When have you taken an action that you are proud of? Write an essay about
such a time.
In your first paragraph, state your central idea. Here are some possibilities:
Copyright © 2014 McGraw-Hill, a business unit of The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc. All rights reserved.

I am proud of myself for quitting smoking.


I am proud of myself for leaving an abusive marriage and getting my life to-
gether afterward.
I am proud of myself for confronting a friend about her drinking problem.
I am proud of myself for earning my high school diploma.

Then continue by explaining the situation you faced, how you decided to
take the course of action you did, and what the results have been.
Below is a sample scratch outline for this paper.

Central idea: I am proud of myself for confronting a friend about her drinking
problem.
1. Lana’s drinking and its effect on her family and job performance
2. The day I told Lana she was hurting herself and her children
3. Lana’s decision to join a twelve-step program

A great deal of specific detail would be needed to support each general point
in this outline. Freewriting or making a list, or both, would help generate the
necessary specific details.
The introduction of the outlined essay might begin with an anecdote dra-
matizing Lana’s problem. The conclusion could restate the central idea and
include a brief explanation of how Lana is doing now.
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Part 4 Readings for Writing

My Two Moms
Zach Wahls

PREVIEW

In this selection, Zach Wahls describes each characteristic that makes his
family unlike the average family in America. However, he also explains how,
despite these differences—including the fact that he was raised by a same-sex
couple—not once has he ever felt anything less than “normal.”

WORDS TO WATCH

homogenous (1): the same or similar


disparaged (3): belittled
renders (3): causes
inciting (6): provoking
aesthetic (6): visual
discerning (7): showing insight and understanding
immutable (9): unchangeable
While this is a reality I was at first hesitant to acknowledge, ultimately, there is no 1
doubt that I have always been different. Folks from all walks of life have been inform-
ing and reminding me of this difference since I was a young child, and they continue
to do so today. But it is on rare occasion that they explicitly define what this difference
is, and I suspect the hesitancy to do so is the result of a culture that by and large craves
conformity whenever possible and finds comfort in its largely homogenous• nature.
I am different insofar as I am defined by a number of traits I do not share with 2
the majority of my peers. Among many things, I am the son of a same-sex couple,
was conceived using assistive reproductive technology, and scored in the 99th per-
centile of the ACT. I am also an Eagle Scout, a small-business owner, a Unitarian
Universalist, and a state championship-winning debater.
My family, too, is undeniably different from the American mean. Two moms 3
is a familial construct that was considered novel until only recently, though it is
still disparaged• as invalid by a shrinking—though increasingly shrill—minority.
That minority would have you believe that this difference is all defining, that it dis-
qualifies my mothers from access to civil marriage (though the Iowa constitution
would beg to differ), and that it renders• my family undeserving of all the rights,
privileges, and protections enjoyed every day by “straight” families.
Yet my moms’ same-sex relationship is just one difference among many that 4
are found in families of all shapes and sizes.
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My Two Moms

At a young age, my family experienced the cruel reality of a chronic autoim- 5


mune disease. My mom Terry was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis at the age of
forty-four, a development that, at nine years old, I could not even begin to under-
stand, And, as a result, there is another significant difference between the Reger-
Wahls household and the rest of America; After twelve years of struggling with
multiple sclerosis, the one treatment that has worked for my mom is a radical
change to her diet, so you’ll find no gluten-based foods in our cupboards and no
dairy products in our refrigerator. Though—and don’t mention this to her—you’ll
find plenty to both at my apartment.
Yes, I can certainly see my family’s differences—and I can acknowledge my 6
own—but I must confess, however, that I am unable to actually feel those differ-
ences. I have, after all, no control group against which I may compare the experi-
ences of my life, no memories of a more “normal,” one-mom-and-one-dad past
against which to weigh the present Though society regularly informs me that my
family structure is different, I feel as though I’m being told that I am wearing dif-
ferent colored socks. Yes, you might not like how they look, but beyond inciting•
the occasional bout of aesthetic• displeasure, how does it affect your life?
I know mixing socks is purely a visual example. Being raised by a lesbian cou- 7
ple is substantively different from being raised by a straight, mixed-gender couple.
Copyright © 2014 McGraw-Hill, a business unit of The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc. All rights reserved.

But I suspect you would find yourself incapable of discerning• either the sex of my
parents or color of my socks from simply shaking my hand and having a conversa-
tion over coffee. In fact, though twenty years is hardly an impressive range of time
upon which to make bold proclamations, I will proclaim that, to date, not once has
anyone ever confronted me, having realized independently that I was raised by a
gay couple. Not once. And I’ll be surprised if that changes over the next twenty.
“Yes, I can certainly see my family’s differences—and I can acknowledge
my own—but I must confess, however, that I am unable to actually feel those
differences.”

But besides the obvious, what were these substantive differences? Well, 8
I learned how to shave from my best friend’s dad and how to tie a tie from an article
in Playboy. I had to carefully explain to an Indian visa officer that I left the “Name
of Father” space blank on my visa application because I don’t know it—I’ve never
met the man, nor do I plan to. The sexuality of my parents, and the rejection they
felt from the Christian faith in which they were both raised, led them to embrace
the more accepting teachings of Unitarian Universalism, another meaningful and
substantive difference from the American mean.
Yet when I declared before the Iowa House Judiciary Committee during that 9
hearing on House Joint Resolution 6, that “the sexuality of my parents has had zero
effect on the content of my character,” I was not bearing falsehood. I believe this
with all my heart to be true. After all, one’s sexuality does not determine a person’s
response to discrimination. That response is informed not by the color of your skin,
your gender identity, your sexuality, or any other immutable• characteristic, but by
the beliefs you hold and the values you prize—the content of your character.
P a g e | 133

Part 4 Readings for Writing

READING COMPREHENSION QUESTIONS


1. The word mean in “My family, too, is undeniably different from the American
mean” (paragraph 3) means
a. cruelty.
b. model.
c. standard.
d. ideal.
2. The word construct in “Two moms is a familial construct that was considered
novel until only recently, though it is still disparaged as invalid by a shrinking—
though increasingly shrill—minority” (paragraph 3) means
a. structure.
b. marriage.
c. agreement.
d. movement.
3. Which sentence expresses the central idea of the selection?
a. The author feels that he and his family are no different from the average
American family.
b. The author does not believe that being different invites discrimination.
c. Just because a family does not conform to the standard mold, it should not
be denied the rights, privileges, and protections that everyday “straight”
families enjoy.
d. Same-sex marriage should be legalized.
4. Which sentence best expresses the main idea of paragraph 6?
a. The author compares his family structure to a pair of socks: although some
people may not like the “look” of it, it bears no direct impact on their lives.
b. The author wishes he knew what it was like to grow up with a mother and
a father.
c. The author believes the differences that make his family unique also make
it difficult for him to adjust to everyday life.
d. The author agrees that his family is not normal.
5. Which sentence best expresses the main idea of paragraph 9?
a. Discrimination is solely about the color of one’s skin.
b. Same-sex couples should not be parents.
c. If a parent teaches his or her child good values, it does not matter whether
that parent is gay or straight.
d. The content of one’s character has little to do with how one responds to
discrimination.
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My Two Moms

6. The author cites several characteristics that make his family “meaningfully
different” from other American families; three of those characteristics concern
a. religion, diet, and wealth.
b. social status, economic status, and occupational status.
c. social status, religion, and wealth.
d. religion, parental structure, and diet.
7. Zach Wahls’s mother Terry became sick with
a. multiple sclerosis at the age of forty-four.
b. a wheat allergy and had to restrict her diet.
c. a serious illness that could not be treated.
d. multiple sclerosis for nine years.
8. The author compares his parents’ relationship to a pair of socks because he
believes that
a. parents must come in pairs.
b. same-sex parents can relate better to their children.
Copyright © 2014 McGraw-Hill, a business unit of The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc. All rights reserved.

c. as long as parents do what they’re supposed to do for their children it


doesn’t matter if they are the same sex or not—much like mismatched
socks that keep the feet warm.
d. no one cares what kinds of socks one wears; neither does anyone care who
one’s parents are.
9. Based on the reading, we can infer that Zach believes in the following:
a. People embrace “differences” only insofar as they conform to their own
notions of “normal.”
b. Children of gay couples develop healthier outlooks on life than children of
straight couples.
c. Parents raise their children to embrace value systems that only conform to
those of the rest of society.
d. His family is fundamentally no different from any other family in the
world.
10. Zach’s final line hearkens back to Martin Luther King Jr.’s speech “I Have a
Dream” in the effort to
a. gain sympathy.
b. rally another March on Washington.
c. remind others that one’s values and belief systems are based on one’s
character.
d. draw attention to his cause.
P a g e | 135

Part 4 Readings for Writing

TECHNIQUE QUESTIONS
1. Wahls uses several literary techniques to drive home some key points about
being different and what that ultimately means to him. Provide an example for
each of the techniques listed below and explain whether you think the tech-
niques he chose are effective and why.
Repetition:

Analogy:

Rhetorical questioning:

2. The author makes a point to differentiate between “differences” and “substantive


differences.” Why do you think he makes this distinction? What are some examples
he identifies as “differences” and some he identifies as “substantive differences”?

3. The author’s thesis statement appears in the final paragraph of the selection.
What is that thesis statement, and why do you think he chose to introduce it in
the final paragraph instead of the first? What impact does this have on the reader?

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS
1. Throughout the selection, Wahls talks very openly about the things that make
him “different” and how those differences make him feel. In what ways are
you different from others, and how have you felt about those differences?
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My Two Moms

2. Wahls grew up with two mothers, and this did not hinder him from learning
important life lessons, achieving certain goals, or developing a strong charac-
ter. Given that, do you think it matters whether a child is raised by a straight
couple or a gay couple?
3. The author’s family structure does not conform with the societal norm, yet it
is still a family structure—just a different one. He feels that, as such, his fam-
ily should not be denied the rights, privileges, and protections afforded to the
more standard family structures. Do you agree or disagree? Why?

WRITING ASSIGNMENTS
1. Wahls shares a number of personal experiences that he feels has set him apart
from others. Write a paragraph about a personal or family experience that you
feel makes you unique. Use concrete details, vivid images, and clear language
to help your readers visualize the event or situation. (To see how Wahls used
details to bring his personal experiences to life, look at paragraph 5.)
To select an experience to write about, try answering the following questions:
Copyright © 2014 McGraw-Hill, a business unit of The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc. All rights reserved.

• Wahls mentions in paragraph 2 that he was a “state championship–winning


debater.” Was there any one thing you particularly excelled at in school
that set you apart from others? What influenced that success?
• What do you know about your parents’ childhoods? How did their up-
bringing affect your own?
Once you’ve decided on an experience or situation to write about, freewrite
to jar your memory. Remember not to worry about punctuation, grammar, or
complete sentences. The goal is to write whatever comes to mind about this
experience and to get your ideas flowing. Following is a freewriting example
for this assignment:

I remember watching my brother play guitar and thinking that I wanted to


play, too. He taught himself when he was in junior high. but I wasn’t good at
teaching myself things like that. Too lazy? Couldn’t focus. Music not my thing but
wanted it to be. Oldest brother played violin. Big sister great at sports. When
I was in fifth grade, school hosted a drawing contest. I always liked to draw.
Doodled all the time. Liked making faces especially, drawing people when
they’re not looking. One day watching brother playing guitar I drew him. Didn’t
think it was so bad and for fun, thought I’d enter it in the contest. I did. I won first
place for my grade! Been drawing ever since. I’ve had a few of my drawings
displayed at local cafes. Sold a few. One local gallery owner took me under her
wing. She’s my mentor and helps me to expand my talents. I’m now learning
watercolor. I have my own studio, that gallery owner, Inna, pays for. Everyone
tells me I’m talented for someone so you. Hope to be famous one day. Art school
first! Maybe one day will learn to play guitar. Nowadays, I draw them instead.
P a g e | 137

Part 4 Readings for Writing

2. In paragraph 1, Wahls writes, “But it is on rare occasion that they explicitly


define what this difference is, and I suspect the hesitancy to do so is the result
of a culture that by and large craves conformity whenever possible and finds
comfort in its largely homogenous nature.” Write an essay that either supports
or disagrees with this premise. Use an informal outline to help organize your
essay. Your outline could look something like this:
Central idea: People crave conformity because it is comforting.
Thesis statement: I agree that people crave conformity because they find it is
familiar, it is predictable, and it helps maintain order.
1. Topic sentence about familiarity.
• Supporting detail.

• Supporting detail.
• Supporting detail.
2. Topic sentence about predictability.
• Supporting detail.

• Supporting detail.

• Supporting detail.
3. Topic sentence about maintaining order.
• Supporting detail.

• Supporting detail.

• Supporting detail.

Conclusion.

Be sure to include concrete details, examples, and transitional statements


between each paragraph.
3. In this essay, Wahls openly talks about being raised by two mothers and the
outcomes of his upbringing. Write an essay in which you compare and con-
trast the outcomes of being raised by your parents with those of Wahls. Think
critically about whether your parents’ sexuality had anything to do with the
differences or similarities. Use a prewriting strategy such as clustering to help
you come up with topics for each of your main and supporting ideas.
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Credits

1. Grammar: Chapter 7 from Developing Proofreading and Editing Skills, Fifth Edition by Camp, 2005 1
2. Working with Sentence Parts: Chapter 21 from A Writer's Workshop: Crafting Paragraphs, Building
Essays, Third Edition by Brannan, 2010 21
3. Sentence Variety I: Chapter 9 from Sentence Skills with Readings, Fifth Edition by Langan, Langan,
2014 45
4. Sentence Structure: Chapter 8 from Developing Proofreading and Editing Skills, Fifth Edition by Camp,
2005 63
The Passive 81
5. Even More about Verbs: Chapter 27 from English Essentials: What Every College Student Needs to
Know about Grammar, Punctuation, & Usage, Third Edition by Langan, Johnson, 2013 82
6. Voice: Chapter 5 from A Workbook on English Grammar and Composition, First Edition by Rani, Reddy,
Ravi, Jyotsna, 2013 89
7. The Writing Process: Chapter 2 from Exploring Writing: Paragraphs and Essays, Third Edition: MLA 2016
Update by Langan, 2013 99
Basic Principles of Effective Writing 133
8. Introduction: Chapter from Exploring Writing: Paragraphs and Essays, Third Edition: MLA 2016 Update by
Langan, 2013 134
9. The First and Second Steps in Writing: Chapter 3 from Exploring Writing: Paragraphs and Essays, Third
Edition: MLA 2016 Update by Langan, 2013 136
10. The Third and Fourth Steps in Writing: Chapter 4 from Exploring Writing: Paragraphs and Essays, Third
Edition: MLA 2016 Update by Langan, 2013 166
11. Four Bases for Revising Writing: Chapter 5 from Exploring Writing: Paragraphs and Essays, Third
Edition: MLA 2016 Update by Langan, 2013 202
12. Introduction: Chapter from Exploring Writing: Paragraphs and Essays, Third Edition: MLA 2016 Update by
Langan, 2013 228
13. Description: Chapter 8 from Exploring Writing: Paragraphs and Essays, Third Edition: MLA 2016 Update
by Langan, 2013 230
14. Process: Chapter 9 from Exploring Writing: Paragraphs and Essays, Third Edition: MLA 2016 Update by
Langan, 2013 241
15. Cause and Effect: Chapter 10 from Exploring Writing: Paragraphs and Essays, Third Edition: MLA 2016
Update by Langan, 2013 251
16. Comparison or Contrast: Chapter 11 from Exploring Writing: Paragraphs and Essays, Third Edition: MLA
2016 Update by Langan, 2013 260
17. Argument: Chapter 14 from Exploring Writing: Paragraphs and Essays, Third Edition: MLA 2016 Update by
Langan, 2013 275

iv
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18. Writing Sentences, Paragraphs, and Essays: Chapter 3 from Write Now, Second Edition: MLA 2016
Update by Russell, 2016 294
19. Introduction to the Readings: Chapter from Sentence Skills with Readings, Fifth Edition by Langan,
Langan, 2014 312
20. Talkin’ White: Chapter from Sentence Skills with Readings, Fifth Edition by Langan, Langan, 2014 322
21. Do It Better!: Chapter from Sentence Skills with Readings, Fifth Edition by Langan, Langan, 2014 329
22. Lost Years, Found Dreams: Chapter from Sentence Skills with Readings, Fifth Edition by Langan, Langan,
2014 340
23. My Two Moms: Chapter from Sentence Skills with Readings, Fifth Edition by Langan, Langan, 2014 348
24. All the Good Things: Chapter from Sentence Skills with Readings, Fifth Edition by Langan, Langan,
2014 355
25. Making Effective Oral Presentations: Chapter 16 from The McGraw-Hill Guide: Writing for College, Writing
for Life, Fourth Edition (with bonus Chapters 21 and 22) by Roen, Glau, Maid, 2018 363
A. Verbs: Form and Agreement: Chapter 24 from A Writer's Workshop: Crafting Paragraphs, Building Essays,
Third Edition by Brannan, 2010 372

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