HYPNOPARENTING

John McDuren

Pitsburgh University
FIRST PART

HYPNOPARENTING BASIC CONCEPT

EXTRAORDINARY CHILDREN WHO DEVELOPED TO BE ORDINARY CHILDREN

Why, the title of this book is not "Shortcuts to print ordinary children to be extraordinary", why why
start with the sub discussion of extraordinary children who develop into ordinary. Right, the
direction of this book will be to find a shortcut to make children who are already ordinary, back to
being extraordinary, but before we see a phenomenon that our children are actually extraordinary
children, but gradually with the development of the age of the child then the greatness began to
erode little by little.

Humans are born with feelings of being able to do everything. That feeling is shown by the courage
to do something. Pay attention to the behavior of a baby aged 8-9 months and above when he just
starts sitting and tries to imitate the adults around him. He will explore his world with courage even
though his body is not ready for it. Because in his head he did not have the concept that he could
not.

He will continue to be enthusiastic about trying to do new things with enthusiasm and diligence.
Even all faced with totality, full of enthusiasm, laughter and tears. But his courage gradually began to
fade in tune with the messages of inability received from his environment. The baby almost every
day begins to introduce the words "no", "not allowed" or "unusual". In fact, usually in one day the
child gets 40 words "no" or "no" to accompany 1 word "YES". This is where the baby begins to doubt
his potential.

Let us consider the Word of God in the letter At Tiin verse 4, which means "We have created man in
the best form". So here it is clear that humans are potentially good, but this verse is also
unconsciously called upon. If it's good why is my child not as smart as the A, the B or the C, and some
regrets about the child's potential is not optimal. This denial stems from the development of
children who are not in accordance with what parents expect, even though they are actually
products from parents.

If all have the same potential, what really distinguishes between people?

To make it easier to explain, I invite you to imagine the analogy of ourselves as a computer set or
rather a biological computer. Why does it have to be a computer, well, because I see this
explanation will be easier, because I also believe that now everyone has known a computer so it will
be more familiar.

When we are born, the hardware or hardware that we have is more or less the same. Biological
computer hardware is the brain. We all know that every baby born, has 1 trillion (1,000,000,000,000)
neurons that make up the brain, about 100 billion active brain cells and 900 billion supporting brain
cells. And God is just and most merciful. All human children are equipped with the same number of
brain cells. There are no discounts and no bonuses. So biological computer hardware is our brain.
For comparison, a bee can build and maintain a honeycomb, calculates distance, collects liquid
flowers, produces honey, has a partner, pays attention to his child and communicates with other
bees with only 7,000 neurons. This indicates that we have enormous brain power. Actually we have
many neurons, even if you have a few million fewer people than others, it won't make a difference
at all.

Okay, we already know that human hardware tends to be the same. What makes the difference is
just the installation of programs or software embedded in the computer. In biological computers the
software is thoughts and feelings. All programs in biological computers are stored in the hard drive,
which is a storehouse of subconscious information, this is where the information recorded by
humans has been recorded.

You do not need to worry, because we are frozen with a hard drive that is very large capacity. The
Scientific American magazine, the November 2005 edition, contains an article about the results of
recent research on brain capacity in storing information. To be able to fully fill the brain hard drive,
we must learn one new thing every second for 30 million years. Right, you haven't misread it, for 30
million years.

Until here we will know that, with the same hardware and hard drive capacity, of course, what
program do we install in us. The sophistication of the software installed greatly determines the
achievements of a person. For example, if we use the WS release 7.0 (Word Star) and MS Word 2010
programs, the results will certainly be different. Why? Because Ms Word is far more sophisticated
than WS.

We should be diligent in upgrading the biological software that we have with better and more
sophisticated ones. But in fact we prefer the old software that is compatible with us, even worse, we
do not complete our software with anti-virus programs. Even if there is only one virus in the
software it will make it work more slowly and easily hang. Any program will try to be sabotaged so
that it doesn't run optimally.

It is sad that we prefer to install negative programs for our children. "How can I install a negative
program on my child", "I always do positive programs". Okay, you can take a breath and hold it and
release it ... well if it's relaxed let's play for a moment.

We really want our children to be successful, our children are smart, but we will be wrong in giving
spontaneous reware, which eventually forms a program in our children. Well you can honestly
answer this question. Okay, compared to successful and unsuccessful people which are more. Well,
if your answer is more unsuccessful people, this is a general answer that I have heard from some
parenting trainees in general.

Then why is that? You don't need to be curious. In some training and parenting activities I usually
give a follow-up question so that you are not curious and that question I am currently giving you to
answer well. The question is very simple, below is a picture of a box, your task is only to determine
which box is the biggest. OK, choose your choice now!
Okay, which box do you choose? Are you sure of that answer? Well everyone turns out to agree that
the biggest box is box B. How big is your belief? Good if you also set 100%. The next question is that
below is a picture of a box, your task is only to determine which box is the biggest. OK, choose your
choice now!

Okay, which box do you choose? Are you sure of that answer? Again, if your answer is C, you have
the same answer as people in general. Why did Ana now choose C even though all chose B even with
100% confidence? Are you also going to protest like a workshop participant or a parenting seminar
and say there is no C and the options are only 2. Well, you still have one question that must be
answered for this last question, think carefully about your answer. Your task is the same, which only
determines which box is the biggest. OK, choose your choice now!

Okay, which box do you choose? Have you also started to hesitate with your answers and also have
started to protest because you have not yet another box, for the time being the answer is D, but
maybe later there will be another larger box. Right, it means that you have begun to understand
what I mean by the spontaneous mistake of reward that we always get from parents, teachers and
the environment.

Spontaneous reware is a spontaneous response that we give to children when he is able to do

something. Children are always compared to objects outside themselves and are usually better than
the child's condition. Let us look at our life journey backwards, when we are small and cannot yet
read, then the people around us say that see that A has read fluently. So at that time we tried to be
able to read. When we have tried our best and have been able to read, does the effort get
recognition?

Oh, it turns out that no, when we can read, what we see is B who can already be mathematical. We
are no longer special because we can read because there is a B who can be a mathematician, but
because when we were kids we were truly true fighters, so they were trying to be overcome and
succeed. SUCCESSFUL? WAS SUCCESSFUL? What do we think when it works, but what spontaneous
reward do we get? See the C English is already smooth, the D has only been working for 2 years, can
already buy a house and blah blah blah ... ... many comparators that have not yet appeared will
always appear when success is obtained. Finally we see that success is difficult, smart is difficult all is
difficult, and that is the program that has been installed in ourselves and our children.

Without realizing it we have made a program fail in children. "But I did everything to motivate my
child to succeed", maybe you will also do the same defense. At the first time, the child may be
motivated, but after all this time trying and succeeding but still failing because of a new comparison.
Children begin to think "yes ... that's right also mama (papa, or anyone authority figure who
pronounces) I am indeed a child who is ………".

When the child has made an image on him, then the program has been installed perfectly. I am
indeed a child ... ... Imaging children does not go away, but usually because of the repetition process,
there is "labeling" with high emotional intensity from the authority figure or from the modeling
process to the group identified. If the installed program is a negative program, the potential of the
child will not develop optimally.

A wrong program will always sabotage one's efforts to succeed, it is this program that then creates a
mental prison and makes protection very comfortable so that we don't have to change with a million
reasons. When there is a chance for success, the high school says, how can he succeed, he is a
Bachelor, a graduate also says how I can succeed, he is a Postgraduate. The postgraduate is also not
confident and says he is a Doctor, whose doctor said that he is a foreign graduate doctor, those
comparators always appear when someone is going to step in, because it is like that program that
has already been installed.

Before I discuss how to overcome it. If you don't mind, I will introduce myself with my life teacher
who is very consistent. My life teacher is a tailor. True, you did not misread him as a tailor. You
certainly wonder what is so special about a tailor that you have to be a teacher of life for me and you
if you wish. I wrote this not because my mother used to be a tailor and my sister is currently
undergoing this profession.

Well this is the specialty of the tailor that we need to emulate. Tailors are the ones who are most
consistent in seeing one's changes and tailors are people who don't believe in old data. You must
have come to the tailor to make clothes, pants, kebaya and so on. If you have a tailor subscription,
what do tailors do before making your clothes? He always asks what the design is, then always re-
measure ourselves.

Just that, nothing special? You are wrong if you say it's a normal thing, that's just a very
extraordinary thing. Tailors never make comparisons with other people, that is, when I am sewn
clothes, the size used is my current body, not your body or the size of another brother, friend or
relative. Now what if we apply this habit to answering the questions in the boxes above. It means
that we make comparisons with ourselves.

To not be confusing, I make an illustration that we face most often in this life and the easiest
example is in children. When new children can read the comparison is made of their abilities before
they can read "Smart now that you can read, it doesn't feel your hard work has succeeded. You must
be proud, because yesterday is still not smooth ". And when children have been able to
spontaneously mathematics the reward given must also be specific "Smart now that you have
smoothly counted it, you must be proud because yesterday it was only able to read".

What effect does the child feel? First, the child feels proud of himself and feels that he is able to
overcome the problem, even this child's confidence will make the child's biological computer
operating system always upgraded with the latest version. Child's self-confidence will form self-
concept, and children's self-concept is the initial foundation for children's success.

Your second benefit has been to familiarize yourself with positive programs for children, you have
made an anchor (anchor) that is very important in his life. An anchor that will guide future life that
success is actually easy. This successful experience is very important because subsequent successes
only only widen the field of success that has ever been achieved. For the anchor discussion will be
described in another section of this book.
Good after we play for a while, when we measure your child's potential. Do it honestly because this
is for the future of your beloved child. Remember to do this all of you will only be given no more
than 10 minutes. Where you can start first. Remember the advantages and disadvantages that are
not physical.

What are your child's strengths? What is your child's lack?

Well, you have devoted all your ability to detect the potential that exists in your child. The question
now is:

• Is it enough to write down all of the time?

• Which is easier for you to fill in the advantages or disadvantages?

• Which do you fill in the advantages or disadvantages with more?

• Do you complete the advantages first and then move on to the shortcomings or do you do the
deficiencies or alternately?

The answer you made to the question above, leads you to a program that you often install in
children. If the time given is not enough, you still don't know your child fully. If you make it easier to
make a negative, then you would rather instill a negative self-concept with children. And if you are
able to complete the advantages first thoroughly. I really salute you, because most parents are
usually only able to write the excess of their children as many as five with ten shortcomings.

Return to ...... the subject is that parents are more likely to install negative programs on their
children. Negative programs that have already become like refusing, difficult to eat, cowardly,
lacking in confidence will always be carried by the child until it is intentionally repaired.

Repaired? Well ... right this is the good news that programs that are already embedded in the
subconscious mind of a child can still be improved. Because the wrong programs are in the
subconscious mind. According to Charles Tebbets, there are five ways to get past the information
filter into the subconscious mind. Understanding this will help our tasks as parents and teachers:

1. Repetition / repetition

Everything that is done consistently or repeatedly will eventually enter the subconscious mind and
become a habit. For example, a child who is always said to be "stupid" or "can't" or "always not
careful" by those around him makes this child finally believe that he is really stupid and not careful.
Furthermore, his mind will order all body mechanisms to make that happen. So he is stupid, not
because he does not have the capacity to be smart, but more because he is dictated by the "stupid"
program that has been installed in his mind.

2. Identification of groups / families

We live in families with certain cultural backgrounds. We will follow the habits that exist in families,
gang groups or communities. This habit is a program that we finally accept subconsciously. For
example, how to talk, how to pray, how to eat, how to dress, how to receive something, including
how to think. If we are raised on other continents, is it possible for us to think and behave like now?
The answer is not necessarily.

3. Ideas conveyed by figures who are deemed to have authority

What is conveyed by someone who is seen as having authority, an expert, someone we respect and
admire, will be easily accepted by the subconscious mind. We unconsciously justify what is said,
especially if what is said makes sense to us. An example is the words of a doctor, while for children
figures who are considered to have authority are parents and teachers.

4. Intense emotions

Events that are accompanied by intense emotional content, both positive emotions and negative
emotions will be very imprint on the subconscious mind. Examples are phobia and trauma or even
when children get report cards with values that parents don't expect (must enter the top 10), then
get angry with the intensity of strong emotions and say "Basic fools".

5. Hypnosis

Hypnosis reaches the subconscious mind with communication techniques that are able to pass
through the conscious mind. With typical communication techniques, we can pass the conscious
mind by deactivating the conscious mind for a moment to directly communicate with the
subconscious mind. When the conscious mind is inactive or more accurately called passive, the
power of suggestion can be nine times more powerful than the ordinary situation. Even hypnosis
allows us to install new programs and uninstall negative programs quickly and effectively without
the interference of the conscious mind which usually asks as a question and reason.

Of the five techniques to reach the subconscious mind, hypnosis is the fastest and most effective
way to get into the subconscious mind. This is because hypnosis is able to pass or pass through the
conscious mind and directly communicate with the subconscious mind, making suggestions
according to what is expected. This condition will make changes more quickly and effectively.
Because of the effectiveness of this hypnosis, this book offers a hypnosis approach to childcare.

ARE YOU READY ………

Well if you are ready, let's play for a moment. Take a piece of paper, either write your full name
along with the place of your birth date. Okay, you have done well. Now move your stationery to the
other hand (which is not usually used for writing). Well now write back your full name along with
your date of birth (use a different hand from the first assignment). Oops ... how do you feel, it's hard,
it's more irregular, ok ... it's up to your opinion.

That is what our children feel when learning new things, need support and reinforcement. Likewise,
when you learn hypnoparenting there will be many new things out of the ordinary, but you must be
prepared to practice and change for the sake of your child. Right now it might be difficult, because
our brains don't have interconnections. But I am sure, when you try the second, third there is
pleasure because the change is immediately felt. RELIGIOUS GREETINGS ……