Toronto Baptist Seminary

& Bible College

A GENERAL THEORY OF LOVE

BY THOMAS LEWIS, FARI AMINI, AND RICHARD LANNON

A Book Review

Presented in Partial Fulfillment

of the Requirements for the Course

Introduction to Biblical Counseling

by

Kelly Reddy

July 2014
 A General Theory of Love is authored by Lewis, Amini, and Lannon, three

California-based M.D.s, psychiatrists, and professors at UCSF’s School of Medicine,

and was published by Random House in 2000.

An important aspect of the book is the authors’ three brain focus: the reptilian,

the limbic, and the neocortical brains. The reptilian is the earliest brain and is termed

reptilian because even organisms as ancient (using evolutionary theory) as reptiles

have them. The reptilian brain controls breathing, swallowing, heartbeating, and seeing,

but not emotion. It is the brain of instinct and of fight of flight. The limbic brain is the

mammalian brain. The authors revere mammals and their limbic brains because

humans are mammals and mammals have emotions. The limbic brain is the reason, for

example, that dogs recognize their owners and can enter into a relationship with their

adoptive human families. The limbic brain is why mammals play with one another. The

neocortical brain is the human brain because, although apes also have neocortical

brains, humans have by far the largest neocortical-to-brain ratio. The neocortical brain

is responsible for humans’ ability to speak, write, plan and reason1. The authors revere

species with neocortical brains above all others as they believe that humans are

animals, that all animals with neocortical brains have a closer common ancestor

(millions of years ago), and that animals with neocortical brains are human-like.

A General Theory of Love contains fascinating research in attachment that the

Christian can use if he finds a vocation with orphans or if he adopts a child out of an

orphanage. Children in orphanages sometimes fail to attach themselves to parents or

to anybody and suffer from attachment disorder. The lack of attachment can result in

1
Thomas Lewis, Fari Amini, and Richard Lannon. A General Theory of Love. (New York:
Random House, 2000), page 27.

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blow-ups with kids running away and getting easily frustrated. Patience is important in

these cases, and with enough love, children can form bonds of attachment. The

Christian is warned that he must have the psycho-spiritual resources to deal with

orphans or to work in orphanages.

A child’s attachment bond with his parents is indicated by separation. If a parent

drops off a child at daycare, the child may start to cry and experience distress. This

plaintiveness is a positive sign as it indicates that an attachment bond has been formed

between parent and child. A child has developed these relational structures by age 5.

An interesting discussion in the book surrounds Frederick II, the 13th century Holy

Roman emperor who conducted an experiment to determine man’s inborn language by

raising children who would never hear speech. All of the infants died before speaking

their first word due to the lack of “clappings of the hands, and gestures, and gladness of

countenance, and blandishments.”2 Similarly, in the 1940s, many infants raised in

institutions due to their mothers’ death or imprisonment and who were not played with,

handled or held, died due to the lack of lack of human interaction— handling, cooing,

stroking, baby talk, and play.

Religion does make its way into this secular book. The authors mention the

Hindu concept of maya, the idea that our reality is really a dream. They state that it is a

rare person who doubts his own mind or subjectivity. The authors cite Augustine to

support the unchanging science of numbers. If the science of numbers changed, the

neocortical brain would adapt quickly but the limbic brain would not. The authors use

the King James Version of the Bible as an example of memory. The King James

2
Lewis, Thomas, Fari Amini, and Richard Lannon. A General Theory of Love. (New York:
Random House, 2000), page 69.

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Version of the Bible represents a durable physical representation of knowledge that

uses a mechanistic system that stores its truths in scattered dots on a page.

An interesting contrast can be made between the authors’ statement in Chapter 1

of the book related to the turmoil caused by humans’ triune brains on our will and on our

our ability to love and to be happy with Paul’s statement in Romans 7 as seen in the

Appendix. Through their use of science, the authors appears to have come up with a

similar observation to the one the apostle Paul made two thousand years ago about sin

and its inevitable commission by fallen man.

A Christian interpretation of A General Theory of Love is that the first relationship

that we form may be with our primary caregivers rather than with God. Theistic

Evolutionist Christians perform research on belief in God that demonstrates that belief

emerges around ages 2 or 3. A Christian can view the book’s statements on relational

structures between child and parent as God using this mechanism to form relationships

with His creatures. God has set up human development so that before the Christian

meets Him we have met people made in His image. God is firm and loving as healthy

parents are firm and loving in secular literature. If parents are a good representation of

our righteous heavenly Father, kids can develop healthy attachments and grow up to be

responsible. However, if parents are significantly damaged, they sin a lot, and they fail

to represent God’s image. As a result, children can be anxious, insecure, disconnected

and dissociated in relationships. Many people are bruised and broken by the fall and

grow up with people who are not very good pictures of God.

People who grow up in wonderful families may experience greater ease in

connecting with God. However, these people may not feel their need for God as

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strongly as people from broken situations. Thus, Christians in a local church may not as

a group be psychologically healthier than a group of people outside of a local church.

A General Theory of Love’s discussion of neural networks can suggest that our

neural networks can still be reformed. Part of growing and healing is not activating old

neural networks. We can rewire our brains with God’s help. Over decades, God can

bring a measure of healing into our lives. In heaven, we will have new brains and a

new, improved capacity to relate with God.

While A General Theory of Love is not a religious or Christian book, a Christian

reader can benefit from the knowledge, education, and experience of three 21 st century

psychiatrists and their view of the world. Love is important, because we are to love the

LORD our God with all our heart, with all our soul, with all our mind, and with all our

strength (Deut 6:5, Mt 22:37), and we are to love our neighbour as ourself (Mk 12:30-

31, Gal 5:13c-14). We are also to obey Jesus’ new commandment, to love one another

as He loved the disciples (Jn 13:34).

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 APPENDIX
Chapter 2, How the Brain's Basic
Structure Poses Problems for Love,
from A General Theory of Love
(published in 2000 A.D.).
The scientist and artist both speak to the
turmoil that comes from having a triune
brain (reptilian, limbic, and neocortical).
A person cannot direct his emotional life
in the way he bids his motor system to
reach for a cup. He cannot will himself to
want the right thing, or to love the right
person, or to be happy after a
disappointment, or even to be happy in
happy times. People lack this capacity
not through a deficiency of discipline but
because the jurisdiction of will is limited to
the latest brain (neocortical) and to those
functions within its purview. Emotional
life can be influenced, but it cannot be
commanded. Our society's love affair
with mechanical devices that respond at a
button-touch ill prepares us to deal with
the unruly organic mind that dwells within.
Anything that does not comply must be
broken or poorly designed, people now
suppose, including their hearts.3
3
Thomas Lewis, Fari Amini, and Richard Lannon. A General Theory of Love. (New York:
Random House, 2000), 33.
Chapter 7 of Paul's Letter to the
Romans Written 2,000 Years Ago
(Published in the early 50s AD)
What shall we say, then? Is the law sin?
Certainly not! Indeed I would not have
known what sin was except through the
law. For I would not have known what
coveting really was if the law had not
said, "Do not covet." But sin, seizing the
opportunity afforded by the
commandment, produced in me every
kind of covetous desire. For apart from
law, sin is dead. Once I was alive apart
from law; but when the commandment
came, sin sprang to life and I died. I found
that the very commandment that was
intended to bring life actually brought
death. For sin, seizing the opportunity
afforded by the commandment, deceived
me, and through the commandment put
me to death. So then, the law is holy, and
the commandment is holy, righteous and
good. Did that which is good, then,
become death to me? By no means! But
in order that sin might be recognized as
sin, it produced death in me through what
was good, so that through the
commandment sin might become utterly
sinful. We know that the law is spiritual;
but I am unspiritual, sold as a slave to sin.
I do not understand what I do. For what I
want to do I do not do, but what I hate I
do. And if I do what I do not want to do, I
agree that the law is good. As it is, it is no
longer I myself who do it, but it is sin
living in me. I know that nothing good
lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature.
For I have the desire to do what is good,
but I cannot carry it out. For what I do is
not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do
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not want to do--this I keep on doing. Now
if I do what I do not want to do, it is no
longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me
that does it. So I find this law at work:
When I want to do good, evil is right there
with me. For in my inner being I delight in
God's law; but I see another law at work
in the members of my body, waging war
against the law of my mind and making
me a prisoner of the law of sin at work
within my members. What a wretched
man I am! Who will rescue me from this
body of death? Thanks be to God--
through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, I
myself in my mind am a slave to God's
law, but in the sinful nature a slave to the
law of sin. (Rom 7:7-25)

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 BIBLIOGRAPHY

Lewis, Thomas, Fari Amini, and Richard Lannon. A General Theory of Love. New
York: Random House, 2000.

Johnson, Eric L. “Wednesday, June 11, 2014, morning session.” Introduction to Biblical
Counseling, Toronto Baptist Seminary. Toronto, Ontario, June 11, 2014.

Johnson, Eric L. “Thursday, June 12, 2014, afternoon session.” Introduction to Biblical
Counseling, Toronto Baptist Seminary. Toronto, Ontario, June 12, 2014.