Atmkami Ability or Disorder

1
ATMAKAMI......ability or disorder? BY SGP2009 [@ 543 -554 ]

Chapter-1 : Hypothesis
1 year later.....
Chapter-1: Hypothesis
Update-1
Ek baar mere Physics ke professor ne mujhse pucha tha ki “Arman ,how would you
relate your life with Physics ?” and I thought the most appropriate answer would
be…. “mujhe kya pata , lawda”….lekin us din maine wo nahi kaha tha…us din toh
maine kuch aur kaha tha jo kuch yun tha….
“life is like Physics,Sir….Life is hypothesis…I mean doing various kind of things…

without assuming that is true…then verify and substantiate by our own
experiments and experiences.Life is a self-evident truth to explain our views…….
Observations……… towards our well known social rules and responsibility….life is
like Physics,sir…simple and beautiful"
.
Simple and beautiful….par main kabhi kabhi sochta hoon ki kya main sahi
tha…kya sach me life simple aur beautiful hai…mujhe apni zindagi dekhkar toh
aisa bilkul nahi lagta…kitni kamal ki baat hai ki jis cheez ko us din main dusaro ko
follow karne ke liye kah raha tha uska exception main khud hoon….
“aaj bhi koyi nahi hai”mayoos hokar maine hostel me apne room ko gusse se band
kiya aur hostel se bahar ki taraf chal diya
Waise toh main yaha kayi baar aa chuka hoon, bahut kuch chize pahle se thodi
badali-badali bhi nazar aati hai lekin mere hostel ke bahar rakhi wo jung lagi kursi
aaj bhi wahi rakhi thi,jaha pahle raha karti thi…jaha baithkar hum log udhar se
aane-jane wale logo ko pareshan kiya karte the. us chair par baithkar maine apne
jeb se cigarette nikala lekin tabhi mujhe yaad aaya ki procedure toh ye nahi
hai…procedure ke mutabiq mujhe pahle goggle lagana chahiye phhir cigarette
jalani chahiye…isliye maine phle goggle lagaya aur phhir cigarette jalakar gand –
fad lamba kash kheecha aur tab tak wahi baitha raha jab tak Arun college se waha
nahi aa gaya….
“hey, Arun”use baithne ki jagah dete hue maine kaha
“hey Varun….mera matlab, Arman…. “baithte hue wo bola”sorry, woh flow-flow

me Varun ka name nikal gaya”
“koyi mila college me”
“ghanta… pura college sunsaan hai…Esha toh door ki baat hai”bolte hue Arun ne
apna sar peechhe tikaya aur aankh band karke baith gaya
“kitna acha lagta hai yaha aakar…hai na Arun…par afsos ki baat hai ki yaha aksar
hum dono ke siway aur koyi nahi hota….pata nahi baki log kab aayenge”
“haan…acha toh lagta hai yaha”aankh band karke lambi saans lete hue Arun ne
kaha”isiliye tune ise banaya…in sabko…ye hostel…college….sadak….mujhe”
kahan kahan se guzar gia – By Babar Khan
2
“maine nahi banaya ye sabkuch…main toh khud yaha aksar fas jata hoon…shayad
ye meri koyi bimari hai…jo bhi ho…mujhe ye bahut pasand hai. pata nahi main
hamesha ke liye yaha kab rah paunga”
“Arman….main haqiqat me yaha nahi hoon aur na hee tu…tujhe college bahut
pasand tha….isliye tera dimag tujhe ye sab dikha raha hai, tune mujhe apne dimag
ke kisi hisse se nikala aur ab tu try mar raha hai ki Esha bhi yaha aa jaye….lekin
Arman, asliyat ye nahi hai….asliyat tere 1400 gram ke dimag ke bahar hai….ab
main aur Esha teri zindagi ka hissa nahi hai…tujhe apni zindagi jeeni hogi…lekin
aise nahi…ye sab toh ek dhokha hai…kayaro ki tarah apne sach se door bhagna
hai…teri college life khatm ho chuki hai. ab tu hostel me nahi rahta aur na hee Esha
yaha hai . tujhe ye samajhna hoga….bajay iske ki tu apne andar us chiz ko
dhoondh raha hai, jo teri kabhi thi hee nahi…..main hamesha yahi chahta tha ki tu,
Esha…se kabhi na mile aur na hee us se baat kare…lekin tune college me kabhi
meri nahi suni….lekin ab bhi waqt hai….samay ke antarjaal se nikal aur ek nayi
shuruat kar…mera kya hai ,main toh jaha choot dekhta hoon wahi lund daal deta
hoon, lekin main tere liye aisa nahi chahta…you deserve better….. than this double
F (fucking frustrated) life…Arman ,you know… once you were the best for us…for
all of us…but now you are the worst…kya tune kabhi socha hai ki kyun tere baki ke
dost…jinhone har chhoti badi ladayi me tera sath diya wo ab tujhse baat bhi kyun
nahi karte….aur……………… “
“aur…..?”
Jab Arun beech me bolte hue achanak ruk gaya toh maine uski taraf dekha par wo
waha nahi tha..wo waha se jaa chuka tha….yahi toh problem hai is jagah ki….ki
wo hamesha aise achanak gayab ho jata hai jaise sala mera dost na ho balki
batman ho…..par Arun ka yun achanak gayab hona mere liye ek sanket tha….ki ab
yaha mauzood har chiz buri tarah se hilegi....dharti ghumegi aur mere sar me ek
tez dard uthega….aur aisa hua bhi.ek tez dard mere sar me utha…dard itna tez tha
ki sala laga jaan hee chali jayegi…main jor se chillaya aur chillate hue wahi
zameen par gir gaya…par ye mere liye nayi baat nahi thi ye toh pichhale kayi
haftoh se mere sath ho raha tha ki achanak main kahi baithe baithe yaha pahuch
jata hoon….jaha mujhe Arun milta hai….jisase main do char baate karta hoon aur
jab wo achanak gayab ho jata hai toh mere aas-paas mauzood har chiz vibrate
karne lagti hai yaha tak ki mera dimagh bhi……yani ki sab kuch sirf mere dimag ke
kisi hisse me hota hai aur tab main apne us physics se life ko relate karne wale
answer ke bare me sochta hoon jisme maine kaha tha ki …life is simple and
beautiful….just like physics.
.
“mujhe kya pata ,lawda…..correct answer hota.khamkha dialoguebazi me life ko

simple aur beautiful bol gaya…yadi ye simple hai toh complicated kya
hoga…”haqiqat me wapas aakar apna sar dabate hue maine kaha...
Ab toh Mujhe aisa lagta hai ,jaise ki main khud ko nahi janta..jaise ki maine ek jaal
apne aas-paas bun rakha ho aur badalte waqt ke sath usme fasta hee ja raha
hoon..waise toh kahne ko mere paas bahut kuch hai aur use sunne ka samay bhi
aapke paas hai lekin mudda jo ye hai ki main iski shuruat kaha se karu…waha se
shuru karu jaha se 8th semester khatm hua tha ya phhir waha se jab main ghar
3
chhodkar Nagpur apne dost Varun ke paas aaya…ya phhir waha se jab maine
Nagpur me Nisha ko pahli baar dekha…lekin ye sab toh main bata chuka hoon toh
kyun na waha se shuru kiya jaye jaha se life ne meri aur maine life ki leni shuru
kar di…
.
College ke baad ki zindagi aasan nahi hoti aur khaskar tab nahi jab apne meri
tarah jhande gade ho…college me maine zindagi ke lagbhag sabhi pahaluo ka
anubhav kar liya tha…mera matlab dosti, dushmanni, pyar, dhokha,mutth
marna,sex karna…ladayi karna…jail jana wo bhi murder ke case me aur phhir jail
se aakar baki bache 10-12 dino me pelam pel padhayi karke 8.5 CGPA se B.Tech
complete karna….koyi sochega ki ab life me isse bura kuch nahi ho sakta.lekin
mujhe kya pata tha ki wo toh kuch bhi nahi tha..asal zindagi toh ab shuru hui thi…
.
Kahne ko toh meri zindagi me ab bhi hariyali thi…I
mean…naukari…chhokari…free wifi…ab isse adhik bhala ek Engineer ko kya
chahiye ? lekin College chhodne ke baad maine ek chiz jo apne bare me guar ki thi
wo ye ki main Depression me tha…main Esha ko left side se pyar karta tha iske
bare me toh main janta tha…lekin main ye nahi janta tha ki uske chale jane ke
baad ya mere chale jane ke baad main aisa ho jaunga….ek ajab hi gussa…ek ajeeb
si kabhi na mitne wali udasi ne mujhe grasit kar diya tha,jiske karan jab kabhi bhi
main Nisha ke sath hota tab bhi mere dil-o-dimag me Esha hee chhayi rahti thi aur
kabhi-kabhi toh gusse se dil karta tha ki ek lohe ka sariya loon aur jakar Nisha ke
sath uske pure khandan ko khatm kar doon…I mean…Esha..BC Nisha aur Esha ke
chakkar me main jitna confuse hua hoon utna toh main Centroid aur Center of
Gravity , term me bhi nahi hua tha…
.
Par problem ye nahi thi…problem ye thi ki main in sabke bare me subah 4 baje
uthkar kyu soch raha hoon aur main problem ye thi ki yadi main abhi utha hoon
toh phhir is waqt mujhe apne flat me hona chahiye…jo ki main nahi tha….main toh
is waqt apne colony ke park me deewar se koodkar uske andar ghas par baitha
daru pee raha tha…Thug Life ! lekin main in sabke bare me kyun bata raha hoon
toh jawab hai…jaisa ki maine pahle hi kaha hai ki waise toh kahne ko mere paas
bahut kuch hai aur aapke paas use sunne ka samay bhi hai…so let’s start it.
UPDATE-2
“you know…I just hate everyone…everyone…fucking everyone…I hate

Varun…Nisha…her father…her mother….her security guard….her lesbo partner
Sonam(who’s also Varun’s girlfriend)…I hate every man and woman……yes ! I hate
the whole mannkind…I’m the guy who’s fucking frustrated…You know my friend,
there is a special word in dictionary for me, who hates mannkind…I don’t know it
now but I’ll tell you later or you can see it for yourself”kahte hue maine mere bagal
me baithe apne naye dost ki aankho me dekha
.
Jaise main use dekh raha tha waisich same toh same wo bhi meri aankho me dekh
raha tha aur main samajh gaya ki lawda use kya chahiye… main samajh gaya ki
4
use meri in baton me koyi dilchaspi nahi hai, wo toh lawda yaha subah ke 4 baje
uthkar isliye aaya hai kyuki use free ka chakna jo khane ko milta hai….
“meet my new friend…Bisleri….”
jo ki humare colony me ghumne wala ek awara kutta hai aur isse meri pahchan kal
raat isi park me hui thi….kal raat bole toh kal subah matlab kal subah 4 baje ke
karib...maine chips ke packet me se kuch chips apne muh me dala aur kuch Bisleri
ke muh me aur phhir pura peg ek saans me andar le liya……
.
“hat MC…pani kam ho gaya”kahte hue main ek bar phhir Bisleri ki taraf
dekha…wo meri taraf hi dekh raha tha.jiske baad maine packet me bacha baki
chips bhi uske samne udel diya aur daru ki bottle uske muh me fasate hue bola
“daru ki botal sambhal kar rakhna be ,nahi toh chodunga….ye botal tere liye mere
pyar ki nishani hai…”
.
Nisha ke mere zindagi me aane ke kuch samay baad mujhe laga tha ki jaise ab sab
kuch thik ho gaya hai aur wakayi me aisa hua bhi tha…kyuki mere dimag me ab
kabhi bhi tez dard nahi hota tha aur na hee mere mare hue dost ke mujhe sapne
aate the…yaha tak ki Aradhna se bhi lagbhag-lagbhag pichha chhoot gaya tha.
Lekin aajkal Nisha mujhe kuch khas bha nahi rahi thi…lekin iska matlab ye nahi
hai ki wo ab mujhe khoobsurat…hot ya sexy nahi lagti…uske liye meri feelings
same hai lekin aajkal main us-se chidhne laga hoon….pata nahi kyun ? aur aisa
mere sath ek baar pahle bhi hua tha…aisich same feeling mere andar Aradhna ke
liye bhi aayi thi jiske baad maine suddenly us-se breakup kiya tha aur usne zindagi
se…
.
“Arman, tum…itni subah…”ek ladki ne mera name lete hue kaha
“haan…waise aap kaun…aur itni subah se kya matlab hai tumhara…ab toh
dopahar hone ko aa gayi hai ”
“main Nisha ki friend…itni jaldi bhool gaye…kal raat ko hum sab movie dekhne
gaye the…”mayoos hote hue wo boli aur isi ke sath uske sath me khadi uski saheli
bhi mayoos ho gayi…
.
“haan…yaad aaya Shipra…waise kaun si Shipra ho tum…Kshipra wali ya simple
Shipra….”
“simple Shipra…”haste hue usne jawab diya
“tumhe kaise bhool sakta hoon main…tu hee hai na wo jo kal raat me 500 ka sirf
popcorn kha gayi thi…sach bata ghar me khana-vana nahi milta kya …ya ye teri
aadat hee hai ki dusaro ke paiso pe aish karna…apne boyfriend ko toh gatak gayi
hogi tu ab tak…mera kahne ka matlab hai ki kuch toh sharam lihaj kiya kar…ab
apni saheli ko hee dekh le kab se line mare ja rahi hai mujhe…mana ki bahut smart
,handsome…intelligent hoon main lekin iska matlab ye toh nahi ki jis thali me
khaya usi ko chura loge…chottiyo…ruk abhi Nisha ko call karke batata hoon ki
tum dono ne mujhe propose mara hai….arey bhag kaha rahi hai ruk…..”
.

5
“aajkal ki ladkiya bhi na ,hath pakdao toh lund pakad leti hai…i…i..just hate
everyone…waise time kya hua hai…Suraj uncle toh kab ka dastak de chuke
hai…”kahte hue maine apni ghadi me time dekha “oh teri ! 8 baj gaye…aur apun ab
tak ghum rela hai…”
.
Apne room par main subah 9 baje pahucha aur pahuchte hee Varun se pucha ki
uska sabse jhakkas formal dress kaha hai lekin Varun ko bhi mujhse kuch puchna
tha isliye usne mere sawal pe sawal daga aur bola…
“tu tha kaha be raat bhar….”
“aa raat bhar…aa raat bhar…jaye na ghar….jaye na ghar”jawab me main chair

par baitha aur mobile nikalte hue gungunane laga
“BC, 4 missed calls…ye Nisha puri yedi ho gayi hai….janti hai ki main us type ka
launda nahi hoon,jo raat bhar apni item se baat kare…lekin phhir bhi har din…I
mean..har raat ko pachaso bar phone karegi…lavda main seedha sadha aadmi
hoon jiski sirf seedhi sadhi demand hai…thoda sa pyar aur bahut sara sex…lekin
nahi inko toh dono chiz hee pel ke chahiye…ab kaha se laun itna pyar jab mere
andar hai hee nahi,toh…aur beta Varun…ye Nisha ki friend jo Sonam hai na jiske
sath tera chakkar chal raha hai us-se thoda bach ke rahiyo…mujhe toh shakal se
hee ek number ki chudail-dayan lagti hai…zara sambhal kar rahna kahi teri bali
na de de….”
“kya be Arman ,kuch bhi bole ja raha hai tu Nisha aur Sonam ke bare me…dono
kitni achi ladkiya hai…tu zaroor daru peekar aaya hai…warna tu aisa nahi
bolta”apni aankhe badi karte hue Varun ne mujhe chup hone ka ishara kiya lekin
maine apni baat continue ki…
“dekh bhai ,aisa hai …mujhe sach bolne ke liye daru ki zaroorat nahi…waise
Sonam se yaad aaya…sale kal raat bhar tere karan main bahar raha…tune toh
bade aram se raat ke 10 baje call karke kah diya ki Arman ek ghante ke liye room
se chale ja…Sonam ke sath fukam-fakayi karni hai….”
.
“toh phhir ek ghante baad aa jana chahiye tha na...aur thoda dheere bol”
“lawda aa jana chahiye tha…ab main thahra sanyasi aadmi jaha do botal daru, do
packet chakna aur do cigarette ke sath do kadam zameen mili…bas wahi apni
duniya…khair tu bata choda ki nahi….”
Main aur bhi bahut kuch Varun se puchta…aur bhi bahut kuch Varun ko apne
adventurous last night ke bare me batata…lekin tabhich ek jordar aawaz mere
kano me padi…jise sunke meri to fati hee…par Varun ki to fat ke hath me aa
gayi…wo aawaz jisne hum dono ki fad di thi wo aawaz Sonam ki girlfriend
Varun….mera matlab Varun ki girlfriend Sonam ki aawaz thi…
“are you guys fucking kidding me….”

6
“no…but According to Shri Arman’s law… the total anger emitted per unit time by
Sonam is directly proportional to the fourth power of our fear….”calculation karte
hue main sirf itna hee bol paya…
“Varun…tumhe to main baad me siddha karti hoon…lekin Arman tumne abhi jo

kuch bhi mere aur Nisha ke bare me kaha hai…wo main ek-ek shabd jakar Nisha ko
batane wali hoon…asshole”itna kahkar Sonam to waha se khisak li lekin hum dono
bhari tension me aa gaye….tension kya,mujhe to aisa laga jaise kisi ne meri lulli
hee kat li ho…
“Varun…that’s why, I hate everyone….aakhir freedom of speech bhi koyi chiz hai ki
nahi is desh me….aakhir log sanvidhan ka palan kyun nahi karte ”
.
Maine Nisha aur Sonam ke bare me jo uche vichar thodi der pahle vyakt kiye the
us-se jyada tension mujhe honi chahiye thi aur Varun ko shanti se baith kar
shantipath karna chahiye tha…lekin aisa bilkul nahi ho raha tha…Varun tension
me pure flat me ghoom raha tha aur idhar main aaram se baith kar aaram kar
raha tha….
“Goldflake Lite is better…”cigarette ke dhue ka chhalla banate hue maine kaha

“abey try to mar”
“Arman…what the….”kheej kar Varun bolte-bolte ruk gaya..
“what the hell or what the fuck ? anyway, what does that ASSHOLE term even
mean….Gand ka ched…? ye kaisi gali hai be…”
“tu kabhi kabhi bahut over ho jata hai be Arman…ab phhir se Sonam ko manane
me kayi din lag jayenge…”
“dekh bidu…wo sab apun dekh lega…lekin abhi mujhe interview ke liye jana hai,
isliye ye sab baate baad me…”
“interview..”shocked hote hue Varun ne puchha “kaha…”
“Machine ke parts design karne wali ek company hai ,wahi maine resume dala
tha…”bachi kuchi cigarette ko ungali me fasakar dustbin me nishana sadhte hue
main bola “aur unhone resume accept kar liya… goal…”
“congrats…toh finally tu serious hone laga hai…par dekhna kahi pichhali wali
company ki tarah ye bhi tujhe bahar na fek de…be careful”
“hmm…uh”
.
Interview dene main full taiyar hokar aur full taiyari ke sath gaya tha, actually
mujhe lagbhag wo sabhi question pahle se hee maloom the jo wo waha puchhane
wale the ,jiske liye jawab bhi maine soch rakha tha….Interview dene main time se
decided venue me pahucha lekin mujhe waha kafi samay tak baitha kar rakha
gaya…maine ek do baar waha baithi receptionist se puchha bhi ki ‘aur kitna time

7
lagega’..jispar wo pahli baar to kuch nahi boli lekin mere ek aur baar puchhane
par wo thoda muh banate hue boli ki
“yadi itni hee jaldi hai toh kahi aur chale jao”
Jispar maine kuch nahi kaha aur chupchap aakar jaha baithkar usne mujhe wait
karne ke liye kaha tha,wahi baith kar wait karne laga….main kafi der tak waha
baitha raha taqriban do ghante…nahi dhayi ghante…actually teen
ghante…confirm, dhayi ghante….jiska reason ye tha ki jise mera interview lena tha
wo aaya hee nahi tha……
“oh mister, mobile baad me chalana….andar jao interview ke liye…”dhayi ghante

baad usi Receptionist ne mujhe aawaz dekar kaha
“BC , kitna akad rahi hai…naukari ka sawal hai, nahi to ek mukka marta to ek
mahine tak dard me rahti….koyi kadra hee nahi hai, tu rook….naukari lagne
de….phhir tujhe sudharunga….”Receptionist ko dekhkar main badbadaya aur sath
me use thank you bhi bola….
.
“I just hate everyone…”interview dene ke baad main jaise hee bahar nikla waise
hee mere muh se ye line apne aap nikli…lekin kyun ? interviewer to achche the ,
mera interview bhi achcha gaya tha…late hone par unhone mujhe cold drink , tea ,
coffee ka bhi offer diya tha….phhir maine aisa kyun bola ? yes …I got it…I hate the
whole mankind.
.
“hello,Arman…”
“nahi ,main Arman ka papa bol raha hoon, aap kaun beta…”aawaz badalkar main
bola…
“Good evening uncle, Main…Main Nisha…”thoda hichkichate hue Nisha

boli…shayad wo bhi thoda soch me pad gayi thi ke mere papa kaha se Nagpur aa
gaye…
“acha to tum wahi Nisha ho…jo maal dikhti aur jiske boobs…ahhhh….wait,I’m
cumming….”mere itna bolte hee Nisha ne phone kat diya lekin uske turant baad
usne mujhe dobara call bhi kiya….
“Arman…church ke paas wale park me abhi milo…”
“mera intezar karna….I’m cumming”kahte hue maine mobile ektaraf feka aur
wapas Varun ka formal dress pahan-ne laga…jo ki room me aakar maine utar diya
tha…room ke gate se maine park tak ka trajectory set kiya aur khud ko apne room
se launch kar diya…lekin main park me land karta uske pahle hee mujhe yaad
aaya ki main condom toh room me hee bhool gaya hoon…isliye main trajectory ko
reverse mode me dalkar…wapas room par pahucha aur condoms ka packet uthaya
kya pata kab zaroorat pad jaye…condoms ki…
“Arman…logo ki kadra karna sikh ja…khas kar ke unki jo teri karte hai…mera
matlab hai ki tujhe kya zaroorat hai Nisha se aise baat karne ki…use dekh kitni
rich hai..kitni pretty hai…lekin maine is baat ka zara sa bhi ghamannd uske andar
8
nahi dekha….i’m sorry lekin yadi wo chahe to tere jaise kayiyo ko har din badal
sakti hai…”condom ka packet lekar main nikal raha tha ki Varun ne mujhe tokte
hue kaha
“one correcton please….mere jaise kayiyo ko nahi…main antique piece

hoon…”Varun ki taraf palatkar main bola”aur sale din ba din mota hota ja raha
hai tu…tu uski fikar kar…meri fikar mere pe chhod de…happy”
“tu pahle aisa nahi tha…mana ki tere sath kuch bura hua hai ,kuch bure log tujhe
mile hai…lekin doodh ka dhula toh tu bhi nahi hai…galti to teri bhi thi…par iska
matlab ye to nahi ki tu aane wale achche logo aur unki achchhayio ki kadra hee na
kare…”
“ toh yadi aapka ye lecture samapt ho gaya ho to main prasthan karu…kyunki tere
anusar jiski mujhe kadra karni chahiye wo park me baithi mera intezar kar rahi
hai aur yadi Shri Varun ki izazat ho to main uski kadra karne jaun….”
“gand marao lawda, mujhe kya…”
“exactly….”kahte hue maine goggle lagaya aur cigarette muh me ek side dabakar
ek selfie li aur room se wapas park tak ka trajectory set karke khud ko launch kiya
.
“bahut jaldi nahi aa gaye”park me mere land karte hee hee Nisha taana marte hue
boli aur maine do ungali apne hontho par rakhkar ishara kiya ki main cigarette
pee raha tha….
“aaj tumne meri friend Shipra ko kya bola”mudde pe aate hue Nisha ne pucha..
“chal pahle thoda udhar khisak…phhir batata hoon..air friction bahut jyada
tha…Kurkure sir..mera matlab Kurre sir sahi kahe the ki..aap physics ke khilaf
nahi ja sakte”
“kyun idhar baithne me kya problem hai…”
“problem to mujhe teri god me bhi baithne se nahi hai..lekin iska matlab ye to nahi
ki main tere god me hee baith jaun…Got it…ab chal khisak…khisak na…hadd
hai…tujhe kya lagta hai ki main us side baithkar badminton khelne wali un
ladkiyo ko line marunga…”
“to thik hai ,mat khisak…mujhe kya, main kal aake line mar jaunga…”
“aaj tumne meri friend Shipra ko kya bola”wapas mudde pe aate hue Nisha ne
pucha..
“kaun Shipra…acha wo…..Varun ki item…ya wo item jiske paas koyi item hee nahi
hai”
“ye item-item kya laga rakha hai…Arman…aisi cheap language ka istemal tum
kyun karte ho, ye jante hue bhi ki mujhe aisi language pasand nahi aur jab wo
meri friend ho tab to bilkul bhi hai…humari society me iske liye ek special word
hai...Girlfriend….tum Shipra ko wo to kah hee sakte ho…maine kya tumhare kisi
9
dost ko kabhi kameena…kutta kaha…nahi na…phhir tum mere friends ke liye aise
words kyun istemal karte ho…aur waise bhi Shipra , Varun ki item nahi….”bolte-
bolte Nisha achanak ruk gayi , kyunki josh-josh me uske muh se bhi item shabd
nikal gaya tha aur main rakshasi hasi ke sath daant fadne laga
“ha…ha….ha….”
Chapter-2 : Tempus Itinerantur
“mera matlab tha ki Shipra,Varun ki girlfriend nahi hai…Varun ki girlfriend to

Sonam hai…Shipra to wo hai jo aaj subah tumhe mili thi aur tumne use kaha tha ki
wo 500 ka popcorn kha gayi thi, iske baad tumne uske sath badtameezi bhi ki aur
bola ki wo tumhe line de rahi hai…vagerah-vagerah….”
“vagerah-vagerah…matlab etc. etc.”
“haan”
“wahi na jo hum answer likhte samay use karte hai…”
“haan ”
“waise sach batau…actually I don’t remember her…mujhe lag toh raha hai ki koyi
mujhse mila tha..lekin kaun ye mujhe thik se yaad nahi hai”
“really…”
“teri kasam…”
Aur phhir mere itna bolte hee Nisha ne apna chehra dusari taraf kar liya aur bahut
der tak chup baithi kuch sochati rahi…
“aur Sonam se tumne kya kaha…ki…main pagal hoon , jo tumhe raat-raat bhar
phone karte rahti hoon…tumne Sonam se kaha ki main yedi hoon…ye yedi kya
hota hai…”
“yedi matlab…matlab…innocent…intelligent aur Sonam se maine aisa kuch bhi

nahi kaha…phhir se teri kasam…”
“tumne mujhe pagal samajh rakha hai kya…”apne hath me rakha mobile gusse se
door fekte hue Nisha boli “tumne mujhe samajh kya rakha hai ,jo har baar meri
jhoothi kasam kha rahe ho…tumhe kya lagta hai ki…ki main bewkoof hoon…jise
tum kuch bhi bologe aur main maan jaungi…”
“teri kasam…sorry..abki baar meri kasam …yadi dekha jaye toh technically,maine
Sonam se kuch nahi bola….wo toh maine apne dost Varun se bola tha…jise phhir
Sonam ne sun liya tha…ab bol jhootha kaun…”
“par tumne to mere bare me aakhir wo sab kaha na….”

10
“actually wo ek prank tha…jo main aur Varun milkar Sonam ke sath kar rahe
the..prank matlab ,hum ek funny video bana rahe the…jisme hum Sonam ka
reaction record kar rahe the….”Nisha ke mobile ko uthakar maine use dete hue
kaha “ab ye mat kahna ki tu mujhse yaha sirf isliye milne aayi thi kyunki tujhe
Sonam ne mere bare me kuch kaha tha…”
“sach kahu to haan…main yaha sirf isiliye tumse milne aayi thi…teri kasam…”
“tumne just abhi abhi mera dil tod diya…”
“toh…”
“toh…jab tumne sach kaha hai to main bhi sach bol hee deta hoon…wo prank nahi
tha…wo sabkuch jo Sonam ne tumse kaha uski ek-ek line …ek-ek shabd yaha tak ki
ek-ek matra sach thi…main tujhse aur tere phone calls se trast ho gaya hoon…aur
ek baat, Shri Arman ko tujh jaisi ladki nahi samajh sakti…tum logo ka level hee
nahi hai mere sath rahne ka…tum log bas gaal aur hoth pichka-kar selfie lo….i..i…
I just hate everyone…I hate Bhipra…sorry Shipra…I hate Sonam…I hate your
parents….i hate you….tum log please kahi chale jao…please…chale jao…kahi
bhi…Delhi…Mumbai…Chennai…uganda…”
“okay…Arman…Goodbye…”itna bolkar Nisha uthi aur waha se jane lagi….
“just getlost…mujhe kisi ki zaroorat nahi hai…main akele hee ye story hit kara
sakta hoon”apna sar dono hatho se dabate hue main bola“MC ye sar kyun itna
dukh raha hai…”
.
Aur phhir mujhe kuch aawaze sunayi dene lagi,jo waha aas-paas ki bilkul nahi
thi…mere hath-pair achanak se sunn hone lage aur dhundhale se kuch chitra ya
phhir kahe ki drishya mere samne aane lage…meri aankh puri tarah khuli nahi thi
aur na hee puri tarah band thi…lekin phhir bhi mujhe samne park ka kuch bhi
dikhai nahi de raha tha…jaise ki kisi ne achanak hee park ko gayab kar diya
ho…pahle pahal to mujhe laga ki ye ek sapna hai lekin phhir mujhe ye ahsaas hua
ki ye koyi sapna nahi balki ek haqiqat hai…jiska andaza mujhe tab laga jab maine
us drishya me apne bade bhai ko dekha…par wo drishya ek sapna nahi balki
haqiqat hai iska andaza mujhe tab hua jab maine khud ko us drishya ke andar
dekha…par ye kaise mumkin hai ? main to yaha sabke samne park me baitha hoon
phhir main waha kaise ho sakta hoon…main janta hoon ki main greatest hoon
lekin ek sath do jagah par hona…ye mere liye possible nahi hai…darasal ye
drishya jo mere sar me uthe dard ke karan dikhayi de raha hai wo mere past ki
kuch haqiqat hai jinhe maine shayad hee kisi ko bataya ho…shayad bole to 100 %
confirm….that’s Arman’s language
.
Meri, mere bhai ke sath kabhi bhi nahi jami..na hee bachpan me aur na hee
ab…hum aksar kayi chizo ke liye ladte the…par phhir aap sochenge ki isme kaun si
nayi baat hai,lawda…… ye to har kahani ka ghar hai, I mean…ye toh har ghar ki
kahani hai…lekin nahi ye har ghar ki kahani nahi hai ye thoda alag aur thoda
dangerous hai…thoda se mera matlab hai…bahut jyada.you know ….its apun’s
language.

11
.
“Arman jita de bhai yar,izzat ka sawal hai…”
“izzat…? iski parwah mere dosto ke samne mujhe marne se pahle karna chahiye
tha…”
“dekh 200 ka match hai…main tujhe 500 dunga…”
“khoon ke badle khoon aur bezzati ke badle bezzati…”kahte hue main aage badha
aur puri taqat ke sath cover ki disha me bat ghuma diya aur phhir peeche palat kar
apne bhai ko angootha dikhaya….waise ch aur dikhane ka tha par Bhai tha isliye
sirf angootha hee dikhaya
Shot khelne ke baad maine yahi socha tha ki ball ab boundary par jakar hee dum
legi lekin ball ek ped se takrayi aur wahi rook gayi,tab non-striker end me khade
mere dost ne mujhe aawaz di aur humne bhagkar jaldi se 2 runs le liye….aur itne
hee run hume jeetne ke liye chahiye the….match jeetne ke baad maine ek baar
phhir Vipin bhaiya ko angootha dikhaya aur wo sirf apna daant piskar rah
gaye,unka bas chalta toh wo mujhe wahi patak-patak kar marte…lekin us samay
unki girlfriend apni kuch saheliyo ke sath waha thi aur kuch dusare log bhi the ,jo
waha match dekh rahe the…jiske karan Vipin bhaiya ne apna gussa apne andar
hee daba liya…
Waha match dekhne walo ke liye ye sirf ek team ke player dwara opponent team ke
player ko tease karna tha ,lekin hum dono ke liye ye kuch jyada tha…jaha India me
cricket har dharm ke logo ko jodta hai wahi cricket ne hum dono bhaiyo me darar
dalni shuru kar di thi…
Meri ek aadat hamesha se thi ki jab main kisi ka Mazak udata hoon to marte dum
tak uska Mazak udata hoon…toh phhir isme main apne bhai ko kaise chhod sakta
tha…jaha Vipin bhaiya ke andar match harne ka gussa tha wahi ghar par mere
indirectly comments ne unka gussa aur badha diya….
“Maa…humare school ka ek senior hai..pata nahi khud ko kya samajhta hai…kal

usne mere dosto ke samne meri utari aur aaj maine…bada aaya tha,role
jamanne…Maa ,pata hai.. kaise match ke aakhiri kshado me wo aaj mere samne
gidgida raha tha…”bolte hue main ruka aur Vipin bhaiya ki aawaz behude tarike
se nikalte hue bola “Arman,match jeeta de bhai yar, izzat ka sawal hai…dekh
match 200 ka hai main tujhe 500 dunga…please bhai …maan ja yar…”
“Arman…ab bas kar, bahut pareshan kar liya tune Vipin ko…”Kitchen se Maa boli
Lekin main kaha rukne wala tha…maine Vipin bhaiya ki khilli udani jari rakhi….
“mom…pata hai..aaj match dekhne kaun aaya tha….”
“Arman ,yadi tune Aksha ka naam bhi liya toh soch lena…patak-patak ke
marunga….”dheemi aawaz me Vipin bhai saab bole
“ab pata chala kaisa lagta hai…jaleel hona…remember , bezzati ke badle

bezzati…”maine bhi dheemi aawaz me kaha
12
“ab yadi tune ek aur shabd bola toh….ye taala jo chair par rakha hai…seedhe fek ke
marunga…”kahte hue Vipin bhaiya ne chair par rakha taala utha liya….
Par mujhe pata tha ki Vipin bhaiya kabhi bhi wo taala mujhpar nahi fekenge
…mujhe kya,waha meri jagah aur bhi koyi hota toh wo wahi sochta…isliye maine
apna karyakram jaari rakha aur Maa se kaha…
“Maa, jo aaj ke match ka special guest tha…uska naam Aks ….”
Pahle toh mujhe samajh nahi aaya ki kya hua , main aise kaise Aksha ka naam lete
hue rook gaya…lekin jab mere mathe se khoon tapak kar neeche aaya toh mujhe
pata chala ki Vipin bhaiya ke hath me jo taala tha….wo seedhe aakar mere sar me
laga tha….main is waqt jitney gusse me tha us-se jyada kahi hairan tha ki Vipin
bhaiya ne aakhir ye kar kaise diya…
“chup ho ja…Arman , warna…sale, patak-patak ke marunga….”
“ab toh seedhe jakar…Aksha ke baap ko bataunga,phhir dekhna kaise uska baap
uske andar se ishq ka bhoot utarta hain….”
“sale tameej nahi hai kya…baat karne ki…”mere paas aakar Vipin bhaiya ne ek
mukka aur mere mathe pe jad diya aur dusara mukka uthane hee wale the ki
maine unhe peeche dhakel diya....jisase unka pair wahi paas rakhi table se
ladkhadaya aur wo apna balance khokar seedhe sar ke bal zameen pe ja gire…
Maine bahut tej dhakka diya tha..jiske karan Vipin bhaiya bahut teji ke sath gire
the…physics ki language me bole toh impact kafi jyada tha…isliye Vipin bhaiya
jaise hee zameen par gire unke sar ke pichhale hisse se khoon nikalne laga yani ki
unka bhi sar phoot gaya tha….Vipin bhaiya ke sar se khoon nikalta dekh maine
aav na dekha taav…aur ghar se bahar bhag gaya…..
.
.
“Arman…uth…itni raat ko park me kya kar raha hai …”mujhe hilate hue Varun
bola
“Varun tu…”
“haan…chal room chal…”
“ghar nahi jaunga main…Vipin bhaiya se meri ladayi ho gayi hai…maine unka sar
fod diya hai….ab ghar jaunga to mammi-papa bahut marenge….”Varun ki taraf
dekhkar maine jawab diya…jiske baad Varun kuch der tak mujhe ektak aise dekhta
raha….jaise maine use hath me apna lund thama diya ho…I mean.. full shoked
“Arman , ya toh tu pagal ho gaya hai ya tu mujhe pagal bana raha hai…abey tu
yaha hai…Nagpur me…bhool gaya kya ki tu ek saal pahle ghar chhodkar yaha
aaya tha mere paas….”mujhe pakad kar uthate hue Varun ne kaha “tu chal…room
.daru piyega toh sab kuch yaad aa jayega…”
“tune mujhe dhoondha kaise…”

13
“tera number off aa raha tha toh Nisha ko call kiya tha maine…usi ne bataya ki tu
yaha hai…le us-se baat kar le…pareshan hai bahut…”Nisha ko call lagakar mobile
mere hath me dekar Varun bola
“kaun Nisha…”
Jiske baad ek baar phhir Varun mujhe aise dekhne laga jaise maine apna lund uske
hath me de diya ho…yani ki full hairan…pareshan…aur abki baar Varun ko meri
taraf aise dekh main samajh gaya ki…main hee kuch gadbad kar raha
hoon…warna Varun mujhe aise gusse se nahi dekhta…maine apnai aankhe band ki
aur jor se apna sar hilaya….
“Nisha…..Nisha…Ni+Sha….Ni= Nickel…S= Sulphur…acha Nisha…Desai ji ki

laundi…abey use kyun call karwa raha hai…thodi der pahle tu yaha rahta toh
dekhta kaise bhav kha rahi thi…goodbye bolkar gayi mere ko…ek baat bolu
Varun…mujhe lagta hai ki wo na koyi kala jadu karti hai…dekhta nahi kaise ajeeb
bartaav karne laga hoon main aajkal…tu naa…us-se baat-vaat mat kiya
kar….”kahte hue maine call disconnect kar di…. “acha ye bata…mera mail check
kiya kya…interview ka result aa gaya hoga…”
.
Maine park se room tak ka trajectory set kiya lekin phhir laga ki Varun udte waqt
air friction nahi jhel payega…isliye maine trajectory cancel ki aur aisich paidal hee
room ki taraf chalne laga…room jate waqt sadak par mujhe Bisleri dikhayi diya,jo
ki apne kuch dosto ke sath race laga raha tha….Bisleri ko samne se apni taraf
daudta dekh main ekdum se uske samne aa gaya aur use rok liya…
“kyun be lawde…kaha ghoom raha hai…in awara kutto ke sath…”Bisleri ka kaan

pakad kar main bola…jiske jawab me Bisleri ku-ku karke kikiyane laga…wo kabhi
apni jeebh nikal kar apna muh chat-ta toh kabhi apni pooch hilate hue kikiyata
…jisase main samajh gaya ki lawda use meri baton me koyi dilchaspi nahi hai…use
toh bas chakna chahiye….
“sale kutte tak matlabi hai…that’s why I hate everyone…”Bisleri ka kaan pakad
kar ghumate hue bola “Varun yadi tu bole toh…”
“nahi…”beech me hee meri baat katkar Varun ne kaha
“sun toh le…”
“bilkul nahi…tu chahta hai ki main is kutte ko apne sath lekar chalu…apne room
me rahne du…toh mera jawab hai nahi…bilkul nahi…”
“ek aur baar soch kar dekh…”
“bola na nahi…BC kitna ganda hai ye…muh dekh lagta hai abhi-abhi kisi nali me
muh marker aaya hai…aur tu thoda door rah is-se…iske daant kitne bade-bade
hai…kaat lega tujhe…”
“ye mujhe nahi kaatega…”
“kyun”
14
“aakhir isne mera daru piya hai………..aur chakna bhi…”
“dekh Arman…tujhe chalna hai toh chal…ise toh main apne sath nahi le jane
wala…”
“khali laundiyo par pyar dikhao tum log…chhote log chal Bisleri…tu nikal ab…4
baje milte hai park me…”
.
Bisleri se vida lekar main room pahucha aur room jaate hee sabse pahle mootne
gaya….
“maja aa gaya baincho…bahut der se lagi thi…”bathroom se bahar aate hue main
khud se bola aur apna mail check kiya….
“tumhari maa ka 9.8, isiliye main kahi aaply nahi karta…”

“kya hua Arman…. ”
“maine abhi just apna mail check kiya….”
“oh…ab samjha….reject kar diya, it happens bro”
“reject…reject nahi kiya be…reject…abey pagal hai kya…reject kyun

karenge….accept kar liya mujhe…”
“toh phhir kyun itna chilla raha hai..”
“lawda kal ki joining date de ke rakhi hai…khamkha Nagpur ka address dal

diya…kahi aur ka dalta toh ek week ka aaram toh dete…”
“arey wo sab chhod na…tujhe toh khush hona chahiye….yaaaaaaa…..party”
“ye sale….chhote log”Varun ki taraf hath dikhate hue maine kaha…

.
Job ka pahla din…aur logo ki ray li jaye toh wo kahenge ki time pe jana…formal
dress pahan kar jana…shoes ache se polish hona chahiye…office me apna chehra
khushal rakhna aur sabse ache se baat karna…khaskar ke ladies se….yadi aap
salah lene jaoge…chahe online ya offline…toh bahut se salah milenge...kuch toh ye
bhi kahenge ki naha kar jana…BC ye bhi koyi salah hai….ki naha kar jaana….par
mujhe salah nahi sahyog chahiye…aur yakin mano toh mujhe aise hee
laparjhandis pasand hai…main jis company me kaam karne ja raha tha uska name
kafi lamba chauda tha…Sharda Machine Tools & Parts Design Limited
Par phhir maine socha ki kaun baar-baar itna lamba naam lega toh maine
company ka name Sharda Vihar rakh diya…Sharda Vihar isliye kyunki mere
school ka yahich name tha…
“congrats Arman ,tune toh bahut lamba teer mar diya…par tu ab tak taiyar nahi
hua…”Varun ne mujhse pucha…

15
“itni fikar hai toh tu chala ja meri jagah…”kahte hue maine apna mobile uthaya
aur apna mood normal karne ke liye video dekhne laga…
“pahle din hee late Jakar galat impression dalega apne boss par…”
“bhad me gaya boss…sala takla…”
“tujhe kaise pata ki tera boss takla hai…”
“guess kiya..aur lavde ab tu chup rahe toh ekat gana sun loon…”
“main ja raha hoon…jate samay room lock karke jana…kal ki tarah khula mat
chhod jana…”
“get out…”
Aur phhir maine wo kiya jo mujhe nahi karna chahiye tha…maine marte dum tak
mobile me video dekha aur phhir bistar par hee mar gaya…marne se mera
tatparya hai neend…aur neend me maine ek sapna dekha jisme main aur Nisha
kitni khushi se apni zindagi gujar basar kar rahe the…us sapne me mere paas wo
sab kuch tha jiski mujhe zaroorat thi…jiski mujhe chah thi aur sabse badi baat ki
us sapne me main bahut khush tha…pata nahi kaise par main khush tha…bahut
khush…jaise ki Nisha hee meri zindagi ho…aur yaha par khushi se mera matlab hai
khushi…par us sapne ke aakhiri chand lamho me kuch thik nahi hua…kyunki is
sapne ka ant ek khoon se hua tha…aur wo khoon maine kiya tha..par ye kaise
mumkin hai…bhala main kisi ka khoon kyun karunga…wo bhi revolver se..?
neend se jagne ke baad maine apna mobile uthaya aur Nisha ko ek sorry wala
messege bhej kar M.B.D. Restaurant me milne ke liye bulaya…main jab se mar kar
zinda hua tha tab se Nisha ke bare soch raha tha aur jaise-jaise main uske bare me
sochta mujhe ahsaas ho raha tha ki wo kitni khoobsurat…kitni ameer hai…aur
yadi koyi meri zindagi badal sakti hai toh wo sirf Nisha hai…
“I love you ,Nisha”khud se kahte hue maine ek aur messege Nisha ko tapka diya
jisme maine 2 ghante baad na milne ko bolkar bas aadhe ghante ke baad milne ko
kaha tha...
.
“aakhir tumne mujhe bulaya kyun…maine toh kal park me hee goodbye kah diya
tha…bahut insult kar chuke tum mere parents ki…mere friends ki aur meri…”MBD
ke andar jate hue Nisha ne kaha aur wahi gate ke paas rook gayi
“hat pagli,ise insult thode hee kahte hai…ye toh mera pyar hai tere parents ke
liye…aur teri un sexy,hot ,glamorous,smart,beautiful saheliyo ke liye aur waise
bhi aadmi bezzati usi ki karta hai jiski wo izzat karta hai…”apni shirt ki jeb tatolte
hue maine kaha aur mera itna kahna hee tha ki Nisha MBD restaurant ke gate se
hee wapas mud gayi….
“wait…wait..”daudkar Nisha ke samne aate hue maine kaha “tum mujhe pyar karti
ho aur main bhi shayad tumhe pyar karta hoon…toh kya tumhe nahi lagta ki hum
dono ko yahi par karna chahiye….”
“kya..sex ?”
16
“nahi,pyar ka izhar….wo jaise filmo me karte hai na ki…ladka,ladki ko gulab ka

phool deta hai toh ladki khushi ke mare apne dono hath apne galo par rakhkar mar
jati hai…”
“kyaaaaaa…”
“sorry…sorry…wo toh aise hee flow-flow me nikal gaya…toh main kaha

tha…haan… wo jaise filmo me karte hai na ki…ladka,ladki ko gulab ka phool deta
hai toh ladki khushi ke mare apne dono hath apne galo par rakhkar thoda sa smile
karte hue haan kah deti hai…phhir dono wahi kiss karte hai aur phhir ek gana
chalta hai…jiski ending ladka/ladki ke ghar me sex scene se khatm hoti hai…”
“toh ?”
“toh shuru kare…”
“tumne kaha ki..tum mujhe pyar karti ho aur main bhi shayad tumhe pyar karta
hoon…shayad ?”
“shayad se mera matlab hai 100 % confirm…you know it’s apun’s language…”
“hmm…”mere taraf dekhte hue Nisha boli aur finally uske chehre par halki-halki
wo muskan aane lagi…jise maine shayad sadiyo se nahi dekha tha..
“kal raat bhi tum aise hee smile kar rahi thi…”
“kal raat…? Kal raat kab…”
“kal raat nahi…aaj din me..yahi kuch…52-53 minutes pahle…”apni ghadi me time
dekhte hue main bola “maine ek sapna dekha tha…jisme main aur tum ek ghar me
the…jo tumhare ghar jitna toh bada nahi tha…par bada tha…suraj ki good
morning wali kirne khidki aur darwaje se pure ghar me faili hui thi aur unhi kirno
me se gujarte hue main ghar se bahar aa raha tha ki tabhi kisi ne mera name lekar
pukara…aur wo aawaz sunkar main muskuraya ,main bahut khush hua…ekdum
achanak se…lekin kyun…aur jab main iska reason jan-ne ke liye peechhe palta toh
dekha ki tum kuch doori par mere peechhe khadi ho ,smile marte hue…halki
si…yahi kuch 1-2 centimeres tumhare honth khule hue the…thik aisi jaisi abhi kar
rahi ho.hum dono bahut khush the aur aisa lag raha tha jaise bas yahi meri life ka
the end hai…mere andar wo sukoon tha jise main apni puri zindagi dhoondata
raha aur kamal ki baat hai ki ,wo tum thi…blue colour ke kisi short dress me…lekin
phhir achanak tumhe kisi ne bulaya…waha par sirf hum dono the lekin wo aawaz
meri nahi thi…wo toh us ghar ke kisi hisse se aayi thi..kisi aadmi ki aawaz ya aurat
ki…mujhe thik se yaad nahi..par waha par koyi teesara tha aur usi ne wo aawaz
tumhe di thi…aur phhir tum achanak se ghabra gayi….jiske baad phhir…”
“ phhir…”
“ phhir…”
“are aage bologe bhi…”

17
“phhir maine tumhe goli mar di…pata nahi kyun…par ,maine aisa hee kiya…jiska
mujhe koyi pachhtawa bhi nahi tha”bolte hue main apne pant ke jeb me kuch
dhoondhane laga “sala gulab ka phool ,jo maine bagal wale ke flat se churaya
tha…kaha gir gaya”
“ye tum kya nikal rahe ho…”thoda peechhe hat-te hue Nisha puchhi…
“revolver nikal raha hoon,taaki tujhe shoot karke sapna sach kar saku… tumhare
liye ek gift laya tha,wahi dhoondh raha hoon…”
“gift…”apne aankhe badi karte hue Nisha wapas mere karib aayi…
“khush toh aise ho rahi hai,jaise main ise Kohinoor condom matlab Kohinoor
diamond de dunga…badi mushkil se ek gulab ka phhol chori kiya tha…wo bhi kahi
gir gaya…ab ise kya bolunga…kahi phhir se iska mood kharab na ho jaye…ek
kaam karta hoon ,next pocket me jo bhi chiz hogi wahi gift bolkar ise pakda deta
hoon…baad me justify kar dunga ki wo chiz badi anmol hai….yesss…”sochte hue
maine apne pant ki next pocket me hath dala aur jo chiz mere pakad me aayi wo
nikal kar maine Nisha ko de di…
“ek kora kagaz…Arman,ye kaisa gift hai…isme toh kuch likha bhi nahi hai”
“kyun tumhe pasand nahi aaya…A-4 size ka kagaz hai..”
“toh ? ye bhi koyi gift hai..”
“tujhe ek A-4 size kore kagaz ki ahmiyat nahi maloom…kitna costly gift hai ye..”
“prove it”
“ye ek A-4 size ka blank paper hai.. jisme main aptitude ke 60 questions solve kar
sakta hoon aur wo 60 question kisi bhi exam me kisi bhi shaks ko naukari dilwa
sakte hai…ab chal maan le ki us aadmi ki monthly income 30k hai toh us hisab se
uski annual income hui 360k aur wo minimum 30 saal tak bhi naukari kare toh
uski income hogi yahi kuch……..10.8 Million…aur ye sab kuch hoga sirf is A-4 size
ke kore kagaz se…aur mujhe nahi lagta ki aaj tak tumhe kisi ne 10.8 Million ka
gift bhi diya hoga…. That’s Shri Arman for you……bitches”
“itna costly gift…wow”
“worth over 10.8 Million rupees”
“thank you…so what’s next”us kore kagaz ko apne purse me rakhte hue wo boli..
“pahle kiss aur phhir sex…aur phhir sex aur phhir ek aur bar sex…”
“shut up”
“nahi..”
“no…”

18
“teen baar nahi toh chalo acha do baar…do baar bhi nahi…chalo koyi baat
nahi…ab kya…ab aise kyun dekh rahi ho…ek baar bhi nahi...”
“hum yaha kya sex karne aaye the…”
“actually maine yaha tumhe apna sapna sunane ke liye bulaya tha aur…aur…ye
kal park me jo hua …matlab jo hua,lekin nahi hona chahiye tha…lekin phhir bhi
hua…jiska mujhe behad afsos toh hai lekin utna bhi nahi jitna tum soch rahi
ho…toh maine socha ki kyun na tumhe jakar…….”bolte hue main ruk gaya…
“sorry bolna chahte ho…”
“kamal hai,main kab se yahi kahna chah raha tha…par mujhe ye word hee nahi
soojh raha tha…par dekho tumhi ne sorry bol diya…chalo maine maaf kiya…tum
bhi kya yaad rakhogi ki kis…”
“yugpursh se tumhara pala pada tha…”
“Nisha , seriously ab main tumhe (5 x 15) % pyar karne laga hoon…aur mera aisa
mannna hai ki is percentage ko aur badhane ke liye hume sex karna
chahiye…”ungali se ishara karte hue main bola “by the way ,Nice boobs…last time
thoda chhote the shayad…tum kaho toh…”
“Arman, main ab chalti hoon…bahut time ho gaya hai…aur mere bachpan ka

friend David bhi aaj hee Nagpur aaya hai toh…mujhe uske sath movie bhi dekhne
jana hai…idea ,tum bhi mere sath chalo…bahut maza aayega…”
“bhad me gaya David…chalo restaurant ke andar coffee peete hai…”kahte hue

maine Nisha ka hath pakda aur restaurant ki taraf badha…
“Armaan…hath chhodo…pagal ho kya…main tumse baad me milti hoon…abhi

mujhe sach me late ho raha hai”apna hath chhudakar Nisha boli… “main toh aati
bhi nahi, par tumne itna jor diya toh aa gayi…”
“it’s Arman…A-R-M-A-N not A-R-M-A-A-N….mujhe gussa aata hai jab koyi mera
name galat pronounce karta hai to…ab chal…chal coffee peete hai…aaj main acha
hoon ,kal pata nahi kaisa rahunga …isliye main aaj ka apna pura time tere sath
bitana chahta hoon…”kahte hue maine wapas Nisha ka hath pakda aur restaurant
ke gate ki taraf badha….
“ye kya kar rahe ho Arman…”jhatke se apna hath chhudate hue Nisha boli “tum
thik toh ho…yaha kayi log mujhe jante hai aur tum mere sath aisa behave kar rahe
ho…Arman main apne family ke sath rahti hoon tumhari tarah akeli nahi…jo pura
waqt tumhare sath bita doon…aur jab main bol rahi hoon ki David jo ki mera
bestfriend hai uske sath main movie dekhne ja rahi hoon toh…tum baat ko samajh
kyun nahi rahe…”
“main nahi samajh raha ? tujhse milne ke liye maine office ka pahla din miss kar
diya…aur tu ek movie miss nahi kar sakti…wo bhi kisi tuchiye friend ke sath…dekh
ab mera mood kharab mat kar aur chal…”
“main ghar ja rahi hoon…”

19
Itna bolkar Nisha palti aur waha se chal di…Nisha ko waha se jata dekh mera
mann kiya abhi uska hath pakdu aur khichkar do-teen tamacha uske gaal par
jama doon aur bolu ki tu meri rakhail hai…toh rakhail ki tarah rah….warna wo
haal karunga ki movie dekhna toh door movie ka name bhi lene se daregi…lekin
main toh is sadi ka sabse mahan vyakti hoon aur yadi main aisa karunga toh mere
fans kya sochenge aur bas apne fans ke liye…sirf aur sirf apne fans ke liye main
apna gussa pee gaya…
“Arman doesn’t need anyone…main khud do cup coffee order karunga aur khud
piyunga…I hate Nisha…I hate her gay father and her lesbo mother …I hate her
hijda friend David…I hate that flop movie and its fucking, flop, faggot
actors,directors and producers….i…i…just hate everyone ”aur isi ke sath maine
MBD restaurant me entry mari…
.
Restaurant ke andar aane ke baad main bahut der tak khamosh baitha raha aur
kuch bhi order nahi kiya..approximately 15 minutes tak…aur haqiqat me 14
minutes 6 seconds tak..jiske baad ek waiter waha aaya…
“kya lenge sir aap…”
“teri maa ki choot…dega kya…”
What a reply! Lekin afsos ki baat ki main use ye kah nahi paya kyunki yadi main
ye kahta toh anjaam bahut bura hota…aur us-se bhi bura ye hota ki is tarah main
Nisha ka gussa us waiter par utarta jise main janta tak nahi…aur in do chizo ne
mujhe aisa karne se rok liya…kyunki ye mere siddhantoke sakht khilaf
tha…kyunki main apna gussa usi par utarta hoon jo uske layak hai…jo uska karan
hai.aur wo waiter uska karan nahi tha….
“thodi der baad aao…”maine kaha…
Nisha toh chali gayi thi,lekin uske jane ka asar mere dil…dimag…lund har jagah ho
raha tha…upar se wo sapna…jo mujhe abhi bhi puri tarah yaad tha. Nisha kitni
sundar dikh rahi thi us sapne me…par shayad wo sapna…sapna hee rahega nahi
toh Nisha mere sath abhi mere samne baithi hoti…par maine use sapne me mara
kyun…kya pata, waise bhi aajkal mera system hang maar raha hai…par mujhe
yakin nahi hota ki Nisha ne mere sath coffee peene ke bajay us David ke sath movie
dekhna choose kiya..jo kisi bhi lihaz se thik nahi tha…kyunki jaha Nisha ab mall
me 3 se 4 ghante waste karegi wahi mere sath sirf aadhe ghante me uska kaam
tamam ho jata aur baki bache time me hum sex kar sakte the…jaha Nisha ab movie
dekhne me hazar barbaad karegi wahi mere sath ye aakda hazar bata dus
rahta…upar se kaha main aur kaha wo jhat ka baal David…matlab economically
aur emotionally ,dono taraf se Nisha ka David ke sath jaane ka faisala galat
tha.par usne aisa kyun kiya ?…kahi aisa toh nahi ki uske aur David ke beech kuch
chal raha hai ? kahi aisa toh nahi ki Nisha mujhe dhokha de rahi hai ? kahi aisa toh
nahi ki do-char din baad Nisha mere paas aayegi aur bolegi ki
“Arman…meri shadi David ke sath ho rahi hai aur main ab tumse nahi mil sakti”

20
Chapter-4 : Tempus Itinerantur - 2
“sir…aapka order…”
Is aawaz ne meri ekagrata todi aur maine aawaz ki taraf apna rookh kiya aur
paya ki abki baar ek ladki mera order lene aayi thi…
“sir..aap kya order karna chahenge…”apna question repeat marte hue us waitress
ne ek aur baar mujhse pucha
“teri gand…tel laga ke…degi kya”
Again…what a reply ! aur ek baar phhir se afsos ki main ye kah nahi paya…reason
wahi purana wala ki…kisi aur ka gussa kisi aur par kyun utaru…
“do cup coffee…100 wali”
“sir, us range me humare paas koyi coffee nahi hai…”
“dhat teri ki…Shri Arman ne kis restaurant ka address de diya…ek kaam karo
tumhe jo pasand hai wo wali coffee le aao…lekin do…”
“okay…koyi aur bhi aa raha hai kya…”
“kyun…nahi bataunga toh nahi degi kyaa…tujhe kya matlab hai ki kaun aa raha
hai…kahi tu Nisha ki friend toh nahi hai ,jo mera Mazak uda rahi hai…”
“nahi sir, mai toh bas aise hee puch rahi thi ,kyunki aapne do cup coffee order kiya
isliye…”
“control…control…gussa bacha ke rakh”sochte hue maine khud par kabu kiya aur
phhir waitress ki taraf muskurate hue dekhkar bola “ek cup tumhare liye…ek cup
mere liye…hmm”
.
Coffee peete-peete maine decide kiya ki ab main Nisha ke bare me aur nahi
sochunga aur apne is decision ko sahi karne ke liye main waha aas paas baithe
logo ko dekhne laga aur kuch der tak kayi logo ko dekhne ke baad meri nazar ek
table par rook gayi, jaha ek family baithi hui thi...ek mard…ek aurat aur unke do
ladke…thik usi tarah jaise meri family thi…hum bhi aksar aise restaurants ya
hotels me jaaya karte the….lekin us din ki meri aur Vipin bhaiya ki ladayi ne sab
kuch badal diya tha…mujhe yaad nahi aata ki us ladayi ke baad main kabhi apne
family ke sath kisi restaurant me gaya bhi hoon ya nahi tab main samajh jata hoon
ki us din ki ladayi ne sab kuch badal diya tha….main aur Vipin bhaiya , hum dono
ek hee school me padhte the…isliye aksar hum dono school me ek-dusare ke kiye
kand ka ghar me bakhoobi bayan karte the…dar-asal hum dono aksar isi talaash
me rahte the ki kab hum dono me se koyi aisi galti kare jise ghar me batane se
samne wale ko daant pade ya maar pade…
“Arman…ab teri koyi shikayat nahi aani chahiye…”school jate waqt mere papa ne
mujhse kaha “aur ab tu Varun ke sath bilkul nahi ghoomega…wahi tujhe bigad
raha hai…”

21
“kaun Varun…wo toh sharif hai papa…use bigad toh main raha hoon…”kahte hue
maine apna school bag kandhe pe latkaya aur aaine me dekh kar apna hairstyle
thik kiya… (“lawda, isiliye baal nahi katwata main…baal set hee nahi ho raha”)
“maine bol diya na ki tu Varun ke sath nahi rahega…bas baat khatm…”
“ok…”kahte hue maine ek aur baar apna baal set kiya aur bus-stand ki taraf chal
diya jaha mera khas dost Varun mera intezar kar raha tha….
“aur launde…sar kaisa hai…suna hai ki tera bhai tere sath taala fek khel raha
tha”bus stand me meri taraf aate hue Varun bola “waise is saal class me do-char
nayi maal aayi hai…”
“maal ko hata side…aur jo cigarette tune last time pilayi thi wo wali laa aur do
lana…aaj do cigarette ek sath piyunga…ek left side me daba ke aur ek right side me
daba ke…”
“ek beech me bhi aa jayega…”
“ Arman se mazak karta hai, nalayak…chal jakar cigarette la”
“Marlboro…”
“jo bhi ho…idk…”
“idk…?”
“I don’t know ...chutiye”
“marlboro ka toh packet hai mere paas…tu do pee…chahe char pee…”
“pura packet ?….acha beta ab samjha ….Reema ke sath apna jugad jamvane ke liye
tu meri sewa me malarboro…sorry,marlboro ka packet lekar baitha hai”
“are yar, tu bhai hai mera…tere liye toh Marlboro ka packet kya, mera reebok ka
naya bat bhi kurbaan…”
“kaha tak baat pahuchayi tune…”
“bas jaisa tune kaha tha…uske according maine teri math ki notebook pe apna
name likhkar use de diya hai…”
“good…dobara kab gaya uske baad…uske paas”
“tune uske baad kuch kaha nahi toh maine bhi kuch nahi kaha…aur phhir tera sar
wala kand…vagerah-vagerah…”
“aaj half time me samosa khilayega toh main teri setting aage badhau…”
“haan na bhai…’’
22
“chal phhir done…aaj Reema ko jakar bolna ki kahi use kisi theorem me doubt toh
nahi…phhir wo bolegi haan,toh tu doubt clear kar dena…”kash marte hue main
bola
“yaar .ye dhue ka chhalla kaise banate hai log…main toh try kar-kar ke thak
gaya…sala banta hee nahi…Varun tujhe aata hai kya…”
“abbey yar…math me toh Reema se jyada meri fat-ti hai aur tune use apne usi
subject ka notes de diya…ab uska doubt main kaise clear kar paunga…”mere muh
se cigarette nikal kar Varun bola “yadi tune science…social science…subject ke
notes diye hote toh shayad main kuch shekhi jhad bhi deta…english…meri English
tez hai…english hee de deta…kaha math subject de diya yar…lagta hai tu chahta
hee nahi ki Reema mere se set ho…”
“beta…uski English tujhse jyada tez hai aur science aur social science wo rat dalti
hai…isliye inme toh wo tujhe ghas bhi nahi dalne wali toh dil dalne ki baat toh door
hee hai… wo kya hai na ki loda aur hathoda bina dekhe nahi mara jata…aur math
ki tension chhod main tujhe do-teen toughest theorem explain kar dunga aur tu kisi
movie ke dialogue ke maafiq yaad karke uske samne bol dona….”cigarette ka ek
lamba kash marker main bola “tu itna nervous kyun ho jata hai aksar…”
“kahi beech me bhool gaya toh ?”
“yaha main italian songs ke lyrics yaad karne ki soch raha hoon aur tu hindi me
theorem yaad nahi kar sakta…tum sale ,chhote log”
“chal bas aa gayi...”
“bas…ya bus ? teri English toh sachmuch kafi strong hai…kaha se seekhi…Lundan
university se”
.
“sir ,aapka bill…”
“hmm…thodi der baad aate toh kya main paise nahi deta…khair jaane do…tumhari
bhi kaun si galti hai”
Bill pay karne ke baad main waha se utha aur MBD se bahar aa gaya…Pahle mujhe
lagta tha ki main dohri zindagi jee raha hoon…ek college ki aur ek aaj ki…lekin
pichhale kuch dino se mujhe school life ke bhi kuch scene dikhne lage hai…pata
nahi kyun,par mujhe lagta hai jaise mera aaj ,mera aaj nahi hai…jaise ki main ye
sab kuch pahle bhi kar chuka hoon…jaise ki main Nisha se ek saal pahle nahi balki
kayi salo pahle mila hoon..aur sach batau toh mujhe ab bhi yakin nahi hota ki 8th
semester khatm ho chuka hai…mujhe aisa lagta hai jaise ki ye sab ek sapna
hai…jaise ki main samay ke kisi antarjaal me fasa hua hoon aur wahi gote laga
raha hoon par ek din meri neend tootegi aur main khud ko college me
paunga…kahne ka matlab hai ki mujhe mera present…past lagta hai aur past
,future……confused ? well ,I’m too…aakhir tihari zindagi jeene ka kuch toh nuksan
hoga hee…
----------------------------------------------------------
School life - Arman Version 1.0
College life - Arman Version 2.0
23
After college- Arman Version 3.0

Ye terminology yaad kar lo,
Chapter-5 : Sharda Enterprises
“hello...”baye kaan se mobile satate hue maine jawab diya
“ji..kya meri Arman ji se baat ho rahi hai”kisi ladki ki aawaz ne dusari taraf se
mera name pukara toh mujhe laga ki meri koyi lady fan hai…
“nahi…mera matlab haan…”mobile ko baaye kaan se daye kaan me shift karte hue
maine bola….
“Arman ji,main Sharda Enterprise se call kar rahi hoon…aaj aapki joining date thi
aur aapko mail kiye gaye call letter me humne saaf-saaf likha tha ki aaj ki date me
aapko join karna hee hai…company koyi delay bardasht nahi karegi…am I right
Mr. Arman…”
“hundred percent…”
“aur aapne aaj join nahi kiya…is-se hume yahi maloom hota hai ki company ke
rules aur regulation ki aapko koyi parwah nahi…”
“mom…I mean , mam…actually baat ye hai ki ,parso girlfriend ke sath mera

jhagda ho gaya tha toh maine socha ki kyun na use aaj date pe le jaun…mujhe ye
khayal bhi aaya ki aaj toh mujhe company join karni hai…aur phhir maine
socha…bahut socha…. toh samajh me aaya ki joining date delay ki ja sakti
hai…main kal join kar lunga aur aap chahe toh main kal 20 ghante kaam karne ko
taiyar hoon…aap chahe toh mujhe punish karne ke liye mere one week ki salary
bhi kaat sakte hai…main mind nahi karunga…par sach manniye…meri girlfriend
ko mannana jyada zaroori
tha…hello…hello…………hellllllo…heeeello……….hellooooo…..phone cut gaya
kya…hello,janemann…bura maan gayi kya…tum chaho toh tumhe bhi date par le
ja sakta hoon…ab toh reply de, ya lawda ghusau toh hee mannegi…lagta hai lawdi
ne call disconnect kar di…gand maraye…talented launda hoon main…”
Maine jeb me ek cigarette sulgaya….matlab jeb me hee cigarette sulgaya…yani ki

maine shirt ki jeb me hee cigarette sulgaya yani ki jeb ke andar cigarette sulgaya
aur machis ki tilli jeb me hee fek di aur jaise hee mobile jeb me rakhne laga toh kisi
ne mujhe call kiya lekin tabhi mujhe kuch bahut bura sa mahsoos hua…mujhe aisa
laga jaise ki bata nahi sakta ki kaisa laga… aur jab meri nazar mere shirt ke jeb
par gayi toh maine dekha ki waha se dhua nikal raha tha aur mere dekhte hee
dekhte mere wo dhua aag ki chhoti-chhoti…nanhi-nanhi…pyari-pyari lapto me
tabdil ho gaya
“iski maa ka…”
Maine mobile ek taraf feka aur apne doo hatho se shirt ki jeb me lage aag ko
bujhane laga…jisme mujhe kuch hee seconds hee lage…lekin jab tak maine wo aag
bujhayi meri wo shirt kharab ho chuki thi aur upar se mere seene ke paas ki thodi
24
si chamdi bhi jal gayi thi…actually jaIi nahi thi bas kala sa nishan aa gaya tha aur
jalan mahsoos ho raha tha…
“aur maro beta stunt…jal gaya na dil,ab kaun bharega iska bill….bill se yaad aaya
mera mobile phone…”
Maine zamin se mobile phone uthaya aur ye dekhne laga ki call kiski thi…“Nisha
call kar reli thi..par kyun…zaroor mujhse mafi magni hogi…rahne do…bahut
uchak rahi thi…lekin kya ye sahi rahega…call kar hee leta hoon .afterall har kisi ka
dil mere dil ki tarah bada nahi hota…”kahte hue maine Nisha ka number dial
kiya….
“Arman…mujhe laga ki tum mera call hee receive nahi karoge…lekin dekho tumne
toh return call bhi kar diya…”call uthate hee Nisha boli “kaash ki tum bhi mere
sath aaye hote…main…David aur Shipra bahut enjoy kar rahe hai…yadi tum aaye
hote toh tumhe bhi bahut maza aaya hota…”
“kya yahi batane ke liye mujhe call kiya tha…”apne jale hue seene aur shirt ko
simultaneously sahlate hue maine puchha…
“I’m sorry ,Arman…ki maine tumhare sath thoda rude behave kiya…”
“thoda ?”
“actually , sach kahu toh sorry tumhe bolna chahiye,par tum toh sorry bolne se
rahe toh maine socha ki main hee bol doon…I apologize”
“apology accepted…ouch..”
“kya hua Arman…”
“kuch nahi bas tumhare gham me apna dil jala raha hoon…”
“ok…bye…Arman. Shipra mujhe bula rahi hai…abhi hum horror house me jaane
wale hai…”
“Shipra bhi hai…aaj kitne ka popcorn chaba gayi wo…”
“shut up,Arman…ok bye…”
“byyyeee….aish karo baap ke paiso par…I hope ki usne last line nahi suni
hogi…Sali, KAPD(khade Armano par dhokha) karke sorry bolne ka natak karti
hai….i just everyone……………hate…..”
Sach kahu toh kabhi-kabhi mujhe nafrat hoti hai un logo se jo mere aas-paas
hai…main thak gaya hoon wahi life roj jeete hue…roj unhi jaane pahchane logo ko
dekhna, unse milna aur ye dikhawa karna ki main kitna khush hoon…jo ki main
nahi hoon…main thak gaya hoon har roj Varun ko dekhkar…har roj Nisha ko
dekhkar…lekin ye baaten main unhe nahi bata sakta kyunki mujhe maloom hai ki
wo mujhe nahi samajh payenge…matlab kya fayda aisi zindagi ka jisme ek saal tak
25
sirf do logo ka chehra dekhna pade…sirf do logo se hee baat karna pade…isiliye jab
kabhi bychance main kisi teesare vyakti se milta hoon toh mujhe aisa ahsaas hota
hai jaise main insaan nahi balki koyi alien hoon ya phhir mujhe prithvi ke kisi nayi
jaati ke samne lakar khada kar diya gaya ho…aur phhir log chahte hai ki main
unse normal behave karu,lekin hota iske thik ulat hai…darasal main ye kahna
chahta hoon main logo ke sath jaanbuchkar waisa bartav nahi karta, jaisa ki main
karta hoon…wo toh bas apne aap ho jata hai…upar se bahut kam sone ki vazah se
aajkal main thoda chidchida bhi rahta hoon…isliye jab bhi koyi jabarpeli ki
hoshiyari karta hai toh main uski hoshiyari uske gand me ghused deta hoon…lekin
jaha aap kaam karte hai waha aapki personal problems se koyi matlab nahi
hota,waha aapko sabhya hee rahna padta hai,phhir chahe aap andar se kitne bhi
bade tharki ya sanki kyun na ho…upar se jab aap apne office ke pahle din hee
gayab rahe ho toh sabhya rahne ki jimmewari…yani ki jimmedari, thodi badh jati
hai aur isi vazah se main agle din white shirt ,black trouser ke sath black tie me
dress up hua aur paidal hee office ke liye nikal pada…pahle toh maine socha ki
Varun ki car ya bike me se kuch utha loon ,lekin phhir mujhe khayal aaya ki yadi
main auto se jata hoon toh auto me mujhe maal mil sakti hai,jinke sath seat share
karte waqt unke shareer ke kuch private part mere shareer ke kuch parts se
takrayenge…halaki iski probability 50 % thi, ya phhir usase bhi kam…lekin phhir
bhi maine auto se jaane ka hee decision liya aur samne se aa rahe ek autowale ko
hath dikhaya…
Autowale ne mujhe dekhkar jaha mai khada tha us-se se thodi door aage me auto
roka aur apne muh ka gutkha thook kar bola “kaha…”
“sharda enterprise…”kahte hue maine auto ke andar nazar ghumayi “bc ek bhi
maal nahi,yaha toh sab buddhi baithi hui hai…”
“25 lagega…”
“5 me chalna hai toh bol…main aaj pahli baar sharda enterprice nahi ja raha
hoon…mera roj ka aana jana hai…”use talne ke liye maine jaanbuchkar aisa
kaha…
Jiske jawab me autowale ne ek aur baar gutkha thooka aur auto ka handle samne
ki taraf ghuma kar accelerator marte hue waha se nikal gaya….
“ek aur auto aa raha hai…ummid hai ki isme maal hongi…”ek aur autowale ko
samne se aata dekh maine mann me kaha aur hath dekar use rukwaya…
“huhh…kohhaaa…”apna muh upar uthakar usne mujhse aise pucha taki uske muh
me bhara gutkha uske muh me hee rahe…
“shordaaa…entorprise…”uski nakal utarte hue main bola…
“30 rupiyaa lagega…”
“30 rupiyaa..”
aur phhir meri nazar andar baithi do ladkiyo par gayi jinke chehra unhone scarf se
thak rakhe the…aur unhe dekhte hee main us auto me jaane ke liye raji ho gaya
lekin aaj meri kismet kharab nikli kyunki jaha se main baitha tha waha se thoodi

26
doori par hee wo dono ladkiya utar gayi aur phhir pure raste bhar auto me koyi
dusari ladki nahi aayi…
sharda enterprises ka head office ek complex ke andar tha…complex ke bahar auto

se utarkar maine autowale ko paisa diya aur upar ki taraf dekha…
“sharda complex…toh ye puri building hee sharda vihar walo ki hai…gazab,lawde

logo ne acha business bana kar rakha hua hai…”
Pahle Main complex ke andar ghusa aur phhir complex ke andar bane sharda
enterprises ke head office me…yaha aane se pahle maine socha tha ki meri pelam-
pel insult ki jayegi…lekin jab main andar pahucha toh dekha ki kisi ne mujhe kuch
nahi kaha aur ek letter dekar ek office me jane ke liye kaha…
“kamal hai…is letter par toh aaj ki joining date likhi hui hai”khud se baat karte hue
main us office ki taraf badha jaha mujhe letter lekar jaane ke liye kaha gaya tha…
“may I come in…”
“who are you…”thoda strict aawaz me ,ek aurat ya phhir kahe ki ek ladki boli…jo
ki us office ke main chair par sawar thi…
“I’m Arman…your new designer…I mean, your new machine designer…”thoda

nervous hote hue main bola…
“Arman…come in.have a seat…”
“thank you….mam”uske samne ki ek chair par apna pichhwada tikate hue main
bola…
“Arman…tumhari joining date kab ki hai…”
“is letter ke according toh aaj hee hai…”apne hath me rakhe letter ko dekhte hue
main bola “par actual joining date kal ki thi…”
“toh phhir tumhe mere samne kal hona chahiye tha, aaj nahi…is delay ki koyi
vazah…”
“wo main kal……kal isliye nahi aa paya…kyunki”
“kyunki tum apni girlfriend ke sath date par gaye the…am I right Mr.Arman…”
“aapko kaise pata”chauk kar maine pucha aur tab mujhe samajh aaya ki kal phone
pe yahi lawdi thi…matlab yahi ladki thi…par is samay mere samne jo aham sawal
tha wo ye ki main ise ladki kahu ya phhir aurat…kyunki wo ladki kahlane ke umra
se adhik aur aurat kahlane ke umra se chhoti thi…matlab ladki aur aurat ke beech
me jo phase hota hai , wo usme thi lekin phhir maine socha ki ise ,iske name se hee
pukara jaye…wohi jyada better hai….. “Ms. Vandana Rathi…huh ,ghatiya name ”
“toh kya kal call aapne ne kiya tha…mam”Ms. Rathi ke toblerone nameplate ko
dekhte hue maine pucha

27
“yes…give me your joining letter”
Iske baad Ms..Rathi ne mere letter pe sign kiya aur mujhe wo letter le jakar wahi
wapas jama karne ko kaha,jaha se lekar main aaya tha…
Jaisa ki maine pahle bataya hai ki mujhe aksar chidh hoti hai kisi naye vyakti se
baat-chit karne me aur yahi haal mera Sharda Vihar me bhi raha ,mujhse
milne…mujhe assist karne ke liye do-char log mere paas bhi aaye lekin un sabse
maine aisa bartaav kiya jaise ki wo mere office me kaam karne wale worker nahi
balki Esha ke boyfriend Gautam ho…aur phhir sham ko 4 baje ke lagbhag mere
computer ke bagal me rakha telephone baj utha…
“hello…”
“aadhe ghante pahle tumhare paas maine do files bhijwayi thi,uski report tumne
abhi tak nahi di…”
Aawaz sunte hee main samajh gaya tha ki ye Ms. Rathi hai lekin phhir bhi maine
pucha ki “kaun” pata nahi kyun par maine aise hee puch liya…
“your manager…”
“Rathi mam… ?”
“puch rahe ho ya bata rahe ho…”
“dono…”
“kya…”
“dono files maine dekh li…ek ko toh nipta bhi diya.i mean first wale ke andar jitney
machine tools aur parts the unki design maine check kar li aur jinki dimensions
galat thi usko correct karke…correct karke…Yogij…Yogijog…..kya nam hai
iska….Yogijogi…Yogi-jogi ko bhej di hai…”
“and what about the second one…”
“I’ll finish it tomorrow….i mean today, at home”
“really…”
“yeah”
“ek file complete karne me tumne aaj ka pura din nikal diya aur yadi tumne dusari
wali file ko ghar par complete kiya toh us par puri raat nikal jayegi…”
“ek engineer aur us engineer ki ek raat ki mehnat par kabhi shaq nahi karna
chahiye mam…”thoda majakiya lahje me bolte hue maine apni ghadi me time
dekha “abhi toh 4 baje hai aur yadi aap chahe toh kal office me aane se pahle tak
main ek kya teen files ko check kar sakta hoon…”
“sach me…soch lo.yadi ek baar commitment kar di toh phhir ….”

28
“don’t worry mam,files bhijwa dijiye…kal aapke aane se pahle teeno files apki
table par hongi…”
“ok…as your wish…”bolte hue Ms. Rathi ne phone rakh diya.
“BC ,randi…”
Rolebazi me maine Ms.Rathi ko ye toh bol diya tha ki main ye kar dunga…main wo
kar dunga…lekin jab teeno files mere paas aayi aur jab maine unhe dekha toh main
samajh gaya ki beta Arman…ab toh tujhe swayam Shri Newton bhi nahi bacha
sakte..kyunki har files par taqriban char se panch ghante lagne the yaani ki kul
milakar 12 ghante se adhik ka workload toh tha hee...
“kaha jaoge…”Sharda complex ke bahar mujhe khada dekhkar ek autowale ne

pucha…
“river view colony…”
“30 lagega…return me koyi sawari nahi milti udhar se….”
Aur phhir maine auto ke andar dekha aur dekhte hee mera mann khil
gaya…kyunki andar teen-teen maal baithi thi and guess what….un teeno me se sirf
ek ne apna chehra dhak rakha tha…maine turant hami bhari aur auto me baith
gaya….auto me main jis ladki ke bagal me baitha tha uski jaangh ka kuch hissa
mere jaangh se touch ho raha tha aur kyunki hum char log ek hee seat par baithe
the toh bahut hee roughly uski jaangh meri jaangh se ragad rahe the….
“aah ,maza aa gaya…kya tight maal hai”andar hee adar khud ko sabashi dete hue
maine kaha
Aur tabhi autowale ne auto rok-kar do aur sawari ko andar bhar liya unme se ek
ladka tha toh dusari ladki…wo dono beech ke seat me meri taraf muh karke baith
gaye….launda toh badhiya adjust ho gaya…lekin ladki ko adjust hone me thodi
dikkat ho rahi thi jiske karan mujhe aur meri sath baithi teen ladkiyo ko thoda
aage –pichhe hona pada…par ye mere liye hee faydemand raha kyunki isi dauran
do teen baar meri kuhani mere bagal me baithi ladki ki breast ke thoda neeche
wale part se takrayi aur ab uski bum ka kuch hissa bhi mujhse roughly touch ho
raha tha….jiske karan mera khada ho gaya….auto ke andar ye mahol taqriban dus
minutes tak raha aur phhir jo ladki ek launde ke sath abhi-abhi auto me chadhi thi
wo thoda tez aawaz me mujhse boli…
“bhaiya ,aap gent hai…aap aage nahi ja sakte kya…”
“nahi ,behan…”
“idiot…mannners nahi hai”badbadate hue usne apna chehra dusari taraf kar liya
Usne aakhiri line boli toh dheere thi lekin maine wo sun li aur aap sab toh mujhe
jante hee ho ki main Newton baba ka third law aaply karne me kabhi deri nahi
karta matlab ki maine usi intensity aur frequency ki aawaz ,jis intensity aur
frequency ke sath wo mujhpar chillayi thi …. main bola…

29
“ye kahi ka rule hai kya ki ladka hee aage baithne jaye…kya main tere se kam
paisa de raha hoon…ya tu koyi rani victoria hai jo main tere khatir aage
jaun….tujhe kya lagta hai ki mere mathe par L likha hai aur idiot kisko boli be
tu…choose any field ….any topic and any place ,I’ll fuck you in your backyard…”
“ladies se baat karne ki tameej nahi hai kya…”
“wah…tum chaho toh hume idiot…kutta…kamina bol lo….wo sahi hai,lekin jab
hum tumhe tumhari language me hee jawab de toh galat hai…mana ki hume
sikhaya jata hai ladies aur senior citizens ko seat deni chahiye lekin tu na toh
pregnant hai aur na hee senior citizen….jitna paisa tu de rahi hai utna main bhi de
raha hoon…yadi aaram tujhe chahiye toh phhir mujhe bhi chahiye…phhir main
kyun aage jakar latku….baklol samajh ke rakhi hai kya aur by the way…who the
hell are you ? do I even know you ?equality chahiye na tum logo ko toh phhir lo
equality…badi aayi tameejdar…aur agali baar kisi ladke ko idiot bolne se pahle
hazar baar soch lena kyunki har shaks Arman jitna dayalu nahi hota jo sirf
warning dekar chhod dega…now get lost”
Iske baad wo ladki ekdum sann ho gayi aur waha baithi baki teen ladkiya bhi…jise
maine abhi batti di thi uska boyfriend bhi sann ho gaya tha… main aamtaur par
itna gussa nahi hota hoon balki isase jyada hota hoon ,ye toh kuch bhi nahi
hai….mere kam gussa hone ki vazah shayad mera lund tha…jo thodi der pahle jaha
aasman ki bulandiyo ko chhu raha tha wahi ab wo patal lok ki surango me kahi
gum ho gaya tha…mera matlab ab bhi mere bagal me baithi ladki ka pichhwada
mujhse roughly touch ho raha tha lekin mera lund tha ki patal lok se bahar aane
ka naam hee nahi le raha tha…
.
“pahli baar tu laptop me movie ya bf dekhne ke aalawa kuch aur kar raha
hai…abey ye kya hai itna bhayankar diagram…”mujhe tokte hue Varun bola aur
main isi ke sath thoda chauka…
thoda matlab yahi kuch 10-12 %...par main chauka kyunki Varun kab aa gaya iski
mujhe bhanak bhi nahi lagi aur wo aakar…hath-muh dhokar…kapde badalkar
,usne jab mere paas aakar mere dwara banaye gaye diagram ko bhayankar kaha
tab mera dhyan uspar gaya….kamal hai, is tarah toh koyi room me ghuskar chori
bhi kar lega aur mujhe bhanak tak nahi lagegi….
“kaha kho gaya be…”abki bar chutki bajate hue Varun bola….
“kamal hai, main ek bar phhir kho gaya…back to back do baar…mujhe koyi bimari
hai kya…pahle toh aisa nahi hota tha…lagta hai mere sixth sence ko repair ki sakht
zaroorat hai aur mujhe maloom hai ki ye kaise hoga….Nisha…sex ”
“ab ye saanp ki tarah kya fusfusa kyun raha hai…hua kya tujhe…”abki baar mujhe
hilate hue Varun ne kaha…
“this is fucking crazy…BC teesari baar…”
Main abhi back to back teen baar apne hee khayalo me hee kho gaya tha lekin iska
matlab ye nahi ki mujhse Varun ne jo kaha mujhe yaad nahi…mujhe yaad hai ki
30
wo mere dwara cad software par banaye gaye gear arrangement ke diagram ko
bhayankar bol raha tha….ab kyunki baatchit Varun ne wahi se shuru ki thi ,isliye
maine bhi wahi se reply dena shuru kiya….
“mast hai na…maine banaya”
“sach…”
“main kabhi jhooth bolta hoon kya…waise laptop par bf dekhne wali baat se mujhe
yaad aaya ki Reema aur tera jhagda solve hua kya…”
“abey uska name Sonam hai…ye Reema kaha se aa gayi”hairan-pareshan hokar

Varun ne kaha
“mera matlab wahi tha…jhagda solve hua…”
“nahi…maine use sorry bhi bola lekin wo nahi mani”
“kaisa aadmi hai be tu…mujhe dekh main kaise Nisha ko har baar handle kar leta
hoon aur ek tu hai Sonam se hamesha sorry bolta rahta hai….”
“ab har koyi Shri Arman thode hee hota hai, kuch aam insaan bhi hote hai…jaise ki
main.waise Sonam lagbhag maan hee gayi hai ,bas uski ek shart hai…”meri taraf
ummid bhari nazro se dekhte hue Varun ne kaha…
“ki main us-se sorry bolu…hai na”
“haan…”
“don’t worry…bol dunga…lekin apne style me…”
“sorry matlab ,sorry hee bolega na…ya Shri Arman ke language me sorry ka
matlab kuch aur bhi hai…you know, its apun’s language”
“relax…sorry hee bolunga…par mujhe samajh nahi aata ki log mujhse sorry kyun
bulwate hai…sorry bolne ke peechhe logo ki ye intention hoti hai ki mujhe maaf
kijiye, hum sharminda hai apne kiye par aur yahi vazah hai ki main kisi ko sorry
nahi bolta kyunki main kabhi apne kiye par sharminda hota hee nahi aur yadi
maine by chance kisi ko sorry bola bhi toh uska matlab ye nahi hota ki main
sharminda hoon…balki uska matlab ye hota hai ki…janeman ,abhi toh main tujhe
aur sharminda karunga..kyunki main mahan…mera lund mahan”
“toh phhir ,ye tay raha ki tu Reema ko sorry bolega…”
“Reema nahi Sonam…”
“haan…wahi, wahi…Sonam…Sonam main tumhe bhool jaun ye ho nahi sakta aur

tum mujhe bhool jao ye main hone nahi dunga…ayyyee…Sonam”
“bas kar be…”
“chal thik hai…toh phhir tu ye apna ye gear chala ,main chala sone…”
31
“sone , time kya hua hai…”chaukte hue maine Varun se pucha…
“11:45 ”
“oh teri toh…12 baj gaye…mujhe laga ki 7-8 baje honge…aaj tu 12 baje room par
aaya yani phhir tu Sonam ke sath kahi bahar gaya tha…”
“good night Arman…”

Chapter-6 : Upheaval
“chal be…”
“bhai ek kaam karna...eyedrop dal de”
“khud dal le”bolkar main wapas lappy me busy ho gaya

Mujhe toh aaj raat bhar jagna hai warna Rathi darling se kiya hua commitment
toot jayega…aur waise bhi mujhe kaun sa neend aati hai…kabhi-kabhi toh lagta
hai ki mujhe marne ke baad hee neend aayegi,khair usme abhi time hai…
Main raat bhar jaga aur Rathi mam ki di hui teeno files ko salta kar cigarette peete
hue morning walk par nikal gaya…waise toh cigarette peena koyi badi baat
nahi…jalao, dhua andar lo aur phhir bahar feko…lekin daudte waqt cigarette
peena…ye badi baat hai….aur main yahi kar raha tha jiske karan park me mere
aas-paas mauzood log mujhe thoda hairani se dekh rahe the…unme se kuch shayad
mann me has bhi rahe honge aur kuch toh gali bhi de rahe honge…lekin mujhe
kaunsa fark padta hai…main toh bas apne aap me mast cigarette peete hue daud
raha tha aur park ke kuch chakkar katne ke baad maine pani ki bottle jisme main
beer bharkar laya tha use kholkar peene laga….main tab tak beer peeta raha jab
tak main ek saans me pee sakta tha aur phhir ek lambi saans chhodte hue park ki
deewar par kood kar baith gaya…
“maza aa gaya, I love beer more than girls…”
“you’re Armaan…hai na”mere samne khade hokar ek shaks ne pucha
“Arman…not Armaaaaaaan…. only single ‘a’ between ‘m’ and ‘n’…samajh me aaya
ya paper me likh kar dikhau…”bolte hue maine bottle ka dhakkan khola aur phhir
beer peene laga….
Beer peete samay mujhe khayal aaya ki ye mujhse milne aaya hai toh zaroor
mujhe janta hee hoga ya phhir mera fan hoga…mujhe ise beer offer karni
chahiye…lekin phhir jab mujhe khayal aaya ki ye beer 760 ki hai toh maine apna
ye irada badal diya
“I’m David…Nisha’s ”
“brother…”
“friend not brother…”

32
“kya fark padta hai dono same hee hote hai…Rakshabandhan me bach kar
rahna”beer ki dhakkan band karte hue maine mann me kaha “acha hua sale ko
beer offer nahi ki…ye toh David hai”
“tumse kuch baat karni thi…tumhare paas time hai…”
Maine apni ghadi me nazar mari aur phhir ghadi ki taraf hee dekhte hue kaha
“tumhare paas char sau char…teen…do….ek…. seconds hai…jaldi bolo…”
“phhir kabhi…baat karenge…”achanak apna mood change karte hue David

bola“main janta hoon ki tum ye soch rahe hoge ki main tumhe kaise janta hoon
,tumhari photo Nisha ne dikhayi thi aur aaj park me tahalte waqt maine tumhe
jogging karte hue dekha toh….”
“chal, be ….kya bore kar raha hai”David ki baat ko unsuna karke main waha se
utha aur room ki taraf chal diya….
David se meri koyi anban nahi thi kyunki afterall wo le deke Nisha ke liye uska sirf
ek acha dost tha aur Nisha ke bare me main aaj tak jo chiz samajh paya hoon wo ye
ki wo meri tarah tharki nahi hai aur wo kisi ke sath bhi kitni raat tak kyun na
ghume…chudegi sirf mujhse hee…ye baat alag hai ki last time mujhe uspar thoda
shaq hua tha ki kahi wo David se toh set nahi hone wali..par aaj David ko dekhkar
main samajh gaya tha ki Nisha use is janam me toh kya agle sau janmo me bhi
nahi milegi, Lekin phhir bhi mera bartaav David ke sath kuch acha nahi tha…jiska
karan, as you know …ye tha ki mujhe nafrat hai naye logo se baat karne se…mujhe
bilkul bhi pasand nahi ki jise main pasand nahi karta wo mere paas aakar mujhse
mere ya Nisha ke bare me baat kare….i just…just hate everyone….
“Arman…”mere khayalo me vighn dalte hue ek aawaz mere kano me gunji aur
main samajh gaya ki ye aawaz kiski thi…isliye is aawaz ko ansuna karke main
room ki taraf aage badhta raha…
“Armaaaan….”ek baar phhir wahich aawaz mere kano ko cheerti hui nikli aur abki
baar aawaz thodi tez thi aur thodi tez se mera matlab hai bahut tez….
“Nisha…mujhe room jana hai aur office ka kuch kaam hai usko khatm karna hai,
isliye main tumse abhi nahi mil sakta…bye”bina peeche mude aage chalte hue hee
main bola ….
“main Nisha nahi Aradhna hoon…”abki baar ye aawaz bahut jyada tez thi…itni tez
…jaise kisi ne mere kaan ke paas jor se chillaya ho aur is aawaz ne mere badhte
kadmo me jam sa laga diya….mera dil joro se dhadakne laga…hath-pair kanpne
lage aur main man hee man me bhagwan se prathna karne laga ki maine jo kuch
bhi suna hai…wo sirf mera vaham ho….
Mere andar itni himmat nahi thi ki main peechhe mudkar dekhu…jabki is samay
full din ka samay tha…mere kadam aise jam ho gaye the jaise ki kisi ne bediyo se
unhe bandh diya ho…matlab main unhe hila toh sakta tha lekin ek kadam bhi aage
badhana mere liye doobhar tha…lekin main pura time toh yaha khada nahi rah
sakta tha abhi nahi toh kabhi toh mujhe peeche dekhna hee hoga…isliye apni puri
himmat jutakar main peechhe palta…par waha koyi nahi tha…

33
“fuck…ab ye bhi din dekhna padega…pahle toh sirf sapne me hee Aradhna ki aawaz
sunayi deti thi ,par aaj toh haqiqat me bhi….ek minute, kahi ye sapna toh nahi…?”
Maine apne aaju baju dekha,sab kuch normal hee tha…main waha ke aas-paas ke
environment ko dekha …sab kuch waisa hee tha jaisa ki haqiqat me hota hai…lekin
yadi ye haqiqat hai toh phhir Aradhna ki aawaz mujhe kaise sunayi de sakti hai
…kahi ye mera vaham toh nahi ya phhir sach me main koyi sapna dekh raha
hoon…sapna ya haqiqat….? Ye Sapna hai…..nahi haqiqat…..nahi ye sapna
hai…pagal hai kya bosedk, ye haqiqat hai…aur Jab bahut der tak mujhe samajh
nahi aaya ki ye ek sapna hai ya haqiqat toh maine apna purana funda istemal
kiya…jo main tab istemaal kiya karta tha…jab mere school ka ek marhoom dost
mujhe sapne me daraya karta tha…sale ne bahut pareshan karke rakha tha,us-se
main jitna dara tha utna toh main 8th Semester ke end me S.P. se nahi dara tha…
.
Main ek ghar ke samne gaya aur us ghar ki boundary par ek mukka marne ka
socha kyunki yadi ye sapna hota toh phhir main jaha soya hua hu waha apne hath
me uthe dard ke karan uth jata lekin yadi mukka marne ke baad main yahi rahta
aur mujhe dard bhi hota toh ye haqiqat hai aur sath me wo aawaz bhi jiske karan
main apna hath todne ka risk le raha hoon…maine apne hatheli ko kaskar bandha
aur ek jordar punch deewar par mara….
“real hai, BC”dard se hath sahlate hue main cheekha aur hath sahlate hue hee
room ki taraf badha…
.
Room pahuchkar maine fridge se barf nikala aur apne hath sekte hue Varun se
kaha….
“Varun tu kisi ache doctor ko janta hai kya…matlab waisa doctor jo buddhijiviyo
ka ilaaz karta hai…”
“buddhijiviyo se tera matlab mental log ?"
“apparently ”
“Neurologist ?”
“hao yar…abhi-abhi mujhe Aradhna ki aawaz sunayi di…”
“ye tere hath ko kya hua…”
“kuch nahi ,bas experiment kar raha tha deewar par mukka mar kar…tere jaan
pahchan me hai kya koyi neurologist”
“dekhna padega”
“dekh lena…”apna laptop on karte hue main bola…aur apne kaam par lag gaya…
“ye bhi complete…ye bhi complete aur ye bhi complete…arey wah ,aaj toh Rathi
darling bahut khush hogi…kamal kar diya apun ne…par kamal ki baat ye hai ki

34
main puri raat jaga aur neend ab bhi meri aankho se koso door hai…ek jamhayi
tak nahi…bolo Shri Arman ki……Jai”
Rathi mam ki fat ke char ho gayi,jab maine Sharda Vihar pahuchte hee teeno files
uske table par fek di toh…matlab jab table par rakh di toh….usne apna spectacle
uthaya aur aise muh banakar mujhe dekhne lagi jaise kisi ne uski choot marte
waqt unexpectedly lawda uske gand me daal diya ho yani ki full shocked… bas fark
itna tha ki Rathi mam ko is samay sirf dard nahi ho raha tha baki pura expression
wahi unexpectedly gand me lawda dalne wala tha….
“Yogi se check karwaya….”files dekhte hue Rathi mam ne kaha aur files dekhte
waqt wo beech-beech me apne hontho ko apne daanto se chaba rahi thi…jisase
main samajh gaya ki Rathi mam ki fat ke char nahi balki aath ho gayi hai….
“bitch please…I’m Arman..Shri Arman”maine mann me kaha
“yogi se check karwaya ?”
“abhi nahi…”
“excellent job….it’s a pleasure to have you, Arman….”files me apni aankhe gadakar

Vandana Rathi boli
“thannnkkk…..”bolte-bolte main achanak ruka kyunki files dekhte hue Rathi mam
itna kho gayi thi ki wo apne neck ke thoda neeche scratch karne lagi aur main bhi
gaur se unke neck ke neeche ke hisse ko dekhne laga….
“abhi iske upar mutth mar du to….maza aa jaye…suppose Arman, ki Rathi mam
apna lawda… yani ki tera lawda choos rahi hai…yahi ,abhi…isi cabin me….phhir
wo apne trouser ki zib kholte hue peechhe mudkar apni gand teri taraf kar deti
hai….”aur mere aisa sochate hee waha ka drishya badalne laga….
maine dekha ki Rathi mam mujhe ungali se ishara karke apne paas bulati hai aur
main unke paas jakar unke boobs ko jor-jor se masalne lagta hoon….Rathi mam ka
ang-ang unke tight trouser aur shirt se bahar aane ko bekabu ho rahe the aur jor-
jor se saans lete hue wo kabhi mere hontho ko chumti toh kabhi mere seene ko aur
phhir usne apne hath se mere pant ki zib kholi aur apna hath mere underwear ke
andar dalkar mere lund ko masalne lagi….Rathi mam ke mere lund chhune se
utpanne uttejana ke karan maine uske sar ke baal ko kheenchkar uske hontho par
apni ungaliya firayi aur phhir use neeche jhukakar uska muh apne zib tak le
aaya….. meri is harqat par Rathi mam ne muskura kar meri taraf dekha aur mere
lund ke bahar wale pant aur underwear ke hisso par apna muh ragadne
lagi….maine apne dono hatho se uska sar pakda aur apne pant par ragadne
laga….Rathi mam is kadar uttejana ke aagosh me thi ki usne mere pant aur
underwear ko chus-chus kar geela kar diya tha aur phhir thodi der baad mere lund
ko underwear se bahar nikal kar apni jeebh se halka sa sparsh kiya…..aaahhhh
“Arman….Arman….”
“haaann…yes mam…”sakpaka kar main jaise hosh me aaya aur hosh me aate hee
apne zib ke paas apna hath le gaya… “ khayali pulav ”

35
“kaha ho mister…kaha kho gaye the…”
“darasal mam main soch raha tha…kya soch raha tha yes… I should use SkyCiv
3D to model and solve complex 3D structures…”
“as your wish…good luck”
“thank you….mam”
.
Aaj ka din mere liye office me thoda boring ho raha tha kyunki aaj mujhe koyi
kaam nahi tha…isliye maine mann me Rathi mam ko chodne ke bare me
socha…kyunki jo time mila hai uska use toh karna hee chahiye upar se Rathi mam
bagal wale kamre me hai toh thodi feeling bhi aayegi aur yadi jyada mann kiya toh
bathroom me jakar muthiya mar lunga afterall, jaisa mann…waisa karm…
.
Maine apne shoes utare aur chair peeche khiska-kar dono pair computer wali desk
par rakhkar aaram se baitha aur ek lambi saans lekar aankh band ki…waise toh
maine ye sab kuch Rathi mam ke liye kiya tha lekin aankh band karne ke baad
mera mann sirf Rathi mam ke cabin tak hee pahuch paya tha ki ekdum se mere
imagination ka scene hee change ho gaya….jaise kisi androoni taqat ne mere mann
ko Rathi mam ke cabin ke bahar se dhar dabocha aur le jakar kisi andheri jagah
par patak diya ho…yani ki charo taraf sirf andhera hee andhera tha…koyi insaan
nahi , koyi aawaz nahi…charo taraf ghanghor shanti…kya main so raha hoon ?
lekin yadi main so chuka hoon toh ye kaise mumkin hai ki main khud se baat kar
raha hoon…par ye toh koyi sapna bhi nahi hai…toh phhir asal me main aur mera
mann hai kaha ? kahi main neend aur sapne ke beech wali awastha me toh nahi
hoon…? Wait, ye aawaz kaisi hai…ye toh…ye toh….mere school ki prayer hai…toh
kya main……………………………………………………………
.
“uth be ,so gaya tha kya prayer me….Arman, uth ja..wo dekh Bhaisa idhar hee
raha hai…yadi usne prayer time me sote hue dekh liya to…tere pichhwade me
seengh ghusa dega”
“Varun tu….”use school dress me dekhkar main chauka…
“aur nahi toh kya…Robert downey Jr. aakar tujhe uthayega…uth ja ab chal…”
“chal ab…ab chal…a bchal….abchal= 6 words yani inse 6! Words banaye ja sakte
hai yani ki 720 words….Varun mujhe aisa kyun lag raha hai ki kisi subject ka test
hai aaj…aaj test hone ki probability kya hai…?”
“zero bata sannata ”
Prayer khatm hone ke baad main…Varun ke sath kuch der School me idhar-udhar
ghoomta raha …aur class teacher ke class me aane se pahle hum dono wapas aa
gaye…
“Armaaaan…”

36
“present sir…”(kabhi toh actual name liya kar be Bulla…ladko ne tera name bhaisa
sahi rakha hai…)
“wo dekh Reema…kitni achi lag rahi hai…”abhi attendance chal hee raha tha ki
Varun apni adat anusar mujhse baat karne me lag gaya
“chal tujhe main kathin wale theorem explain kar deta hoon ,taki Reema se teri
setting ho jaye...main pahle tujhe theorem samjha deta hoon jise tu dialogue bana
kar ratt lena aur apne se koyi bhi…I repeat… apne se koyi bhi line mat add karna
aur aakhiri me hence proved likhkar pen copy me halke se fekna, lekin pen copy se
neeche nahi girna chahiye…I repeat ,pen copy ke neeche nahi girna chahiye warna
ghamand wala expression hoga ….pen halke se copy par fekna..hmm… actually
fekna mat…pen ko copy me rakhna aur jis side Reema hogi us side ungali se roll
kar dena…roll matlab samajhta hai na…ye dekh aise…”apne pen ko desk par roll
karke Varun ko dikhate hue main bola “toh ahiste se pen ko roll karna aur
muskurate hue normal aawaz me Reema ki taraf dekhkar bolna ….Hence ( ½
second gap ) proved aur phhir waha se turant uthna aur meri taraf aana….turant
uthna ,lekin aaram se uthna….hadbada kar nahi aur thank you…you’re so smart
type ke words sunkar ansuna karna aur seedhe, bina peechhe mude meri taraf
aana….chal ab bol ke dekha hence proved….”
“hence proved..”
“itni jaldi nahi…hence…half second gap….phhir proved….hence proved”
“hence proved…”
“exactly…”
“kaun nalayak peechhe se aawaz kar raha hai…khade ho ja…”humare class

teacher shri…shriman Bulla ji ki moti aawaz class me gunj uthi…jise sunkar aadhe
student toh aise hee has diye lekin main nahi hasa kyunki main…main toh uski
nazar me is school ka sabse acha student tha….main toh apne school ka topper
tha…toh phhir according to stupid teacher’s stupid logic…main toh halla kar hee
nahi sakta tha….”
“Arman…kaun halla kar raha hai ,name batao toh…”mujhe khada karke Bulla ne
pucha…
“sir , ye Varun…Varun halla kar raha hai…”bina ek pal gawaye main bola…
“sir ,Arman jhooth bol raha hai…maine halla nahi kiya…”seena taankar Varun bhi
bina ek pal gawaye mere virodh me uth khada hua…
“chup kar nalayak…Arman jhooth thodi bolega ,wo toh school ka sabse acha ladka
hai…chal bahar ja class se…”
“kya sir, aap bhi…”
“jaata hai ya main aaun…nalayak…disturb karta hain attendance lete time…”aur

phhir meri taraf dekhkar Bulla ne pucha “aur kaun-kaun halla kar raha tha
Arman…”
37
“sir…ye Reema aur uske baju me baithi hai jo isi saal aayi hai…kya name hai
uska…. Shweta…haan…Shweta….wo bhi halla kar rahi thi…”
“Sirrrrr…”bijali ki bhati Shweta uthi aur meri taraf dekhkar boli “sir, ye ladka
jhooth bol raha hai…”
“Shweta…tum toh padhne me achi ho phhir kyun baat kar rahi thi…aur Arman
kabhi jhooth nahi bolta kyunki wo toh…”
“School ka sabse acha ladka hai…”Bulla ki praising lekin boring line ko complete
karte hue main bola aur Shweta gusse se mujhe ghurte hue baith gayi...
raha sawal Reema ka toh wo pichhale do saal se mere sath padh rahi thi…isliye wo
janti thi ki Bulla ko ullu banana meri aadat hai aur ladkiyo ko warning dekar
chhod dena…Bulla ki aadat hai…isliye wo kabhi react nahi karti thi balki andar
hee andar ise enjoy karti thi…jiske karan kabhi-kabhi mujhe lagta tha ki shayad
wo mujhse man hee man me pyar karti hai….lekin Varun ke karan maine use
chhod rakha tha kyunki mera ek siddhant tha ki dost ki bahan aur dost ki maal ko
kabhi line nahi marni chahiye….yani ki Varun ki maal Reema mere liye Varun ki
bahan ki tarah thi yani ki meri bhi bahan….and this is the first law of
friendynamic…..proposed by Sir Arman”
.
School me meri bahut jyada hee dhak thi jiske kayi karan the…pahla karan ye tha
ki main School ka topper tha…Literally . last year maine jo marks score school kiye
the utne pure school me kisi ne nahi kiye the, upar se mere school me aaj tak ka
highest marks ka jo record tha use bhi maine 0.40 % adhik lakar tod diya tha…ye
hua pahla karan. Dusara karan ye tha ki main cricket me apne school se state level
ke do players me se ek tha aur aage sirf isliye khelne nahi ja paya kyunki mere
gharwalo ko laga ki khel me jyada dhyan dene ki vazah se mere marks Pandey ji ki
beti se kam aa jayenge…teesara karan ye tha ki main apne school ka president
tha…yeah , main president tha…chautha karan ye tha ki mere father mere school
ke trustee me se ek the….pachwa karan ye tha ki main apne school se is saal bhi top
marne wala tha aur sixth reason ye tha ki main…main tha. Isliye sare teachers
mujhe jante bhi the aur mante bhi the…halaki main thoda ghamandi bhi tha jiske
chalte ek-do teacher mujh napasand bhi karte the lekin apun ne kabhi iski parvaah
nahi ki….
.
Next period me Varun ne mere bataye anusar wo theorem Reema ko explain kiya
aur plan ke according hence proved bolkar meri taraf aane laga….
“mujhe dekh rahi hai kya be…”
“hao,chup chap aaja…peechhe mat mudna…tujhe hee dekh rahi hai…”
“lagta hai pat gayi bhai…thank you …kya batau ,tujhe ki kitna khush hoon…”

38
“soch ,jab sirf mere sath class me baitkar tu itne jhande gaad raha hai toh , yadi
exam me mere aage ya peechhe hota toh…mera matlab tera name ‘A’ se hona
chahiye tha…”
“lekin mujhe mera name pasand hai…VARUN….VARUN DEV…sakshat bhagwan ke

darshan hote hai tujhe roj…aur ab is-se jyada kya chahiye tujhe…”
“mera matlab completely change mat kar…bas samne ka V hata de…Run suffix me
rakhe rakh….ARUN….Arun…Varun…Arun….dekh kitna acha name hai….Arun-
Arman….jodi bhi jam rahi hai….”
“prabhu mujhe kshama karo …main Varun hee thik hoon…”
“jaisi teri marji…mera kya ,main toh tere hee fayde ki baat kar raha tha….”
.
“sir…Arman sir….”
“kaun hai be…”gusse se daant pees kar main bola aur samne Sharda Vihar me
kaam karne wale peon ko dekhkar main apna pura gussa pee gaya,kyunki kisi
mahan vyakti ne kaha tha ki yadi kisi shaks ka kirdar janna ho toh ye dekho ki
uska bartaav uske neeche ohade me kaam karne walo ke sath kaisa hai…jitna acha
bartaav, utna acha wo insaan….
“sorry yar…kal Rathi mam ne itna kaam de diya tha ki raat bhar nahi so paya aur
jab tune uthaya toh tujh par chilla utha…sorry”
“koyi baat nahi..”khush hokar usne kaha
“jyada khush mat ho, main sorry isiliye nahi bolta kyunki main apne kiye par
sharminda hoon,balki isliye taaki samne wale ko aur sharminda kar saku…ja chay
le ke aa…”
“coffee ya chay”
“bidu ,I’m an Engineer…Mechanical Engineer….mujhe chay aur cigarette ki aadat

hai…par tune mujhe chay ke liye nahi uthaya…toh phhir kisliye uthaya”
“arey wo toh main batana hee bhool gaya….Vandana mam bula rahi hai…”
“iski to…chain se jeene nahi deti toh kam se kam chain se sone toh de….waise kyun
bulaya hai…tujhe koyi idea hai kya…”
“no idea…”
“chal ja phhir…kaha acha khasa main Shweta se milne wala tha, isne utha
diya…par manna padega , past ke ek-ek events ko exactly itne detail me yaad
karna kitna shandar hai…par kahi ye koyi bimari toh nahi ? kya fark padta hai,
kaun sa main kisi ko jaan se maar raha hoon…main toh bas apne hee past events
ko realize kar raha hoon….”sochate hue main utha aur jamhayi + angadayi ,
simultaneously lete hue apni garden chatkayi….
.
39
“itni der…dus minuts ho gaye tumhe bulaye hue aur tum intercom ka phone kyun
nahi utha rahe the…”mere andar ghuste hee Rathi baras padi, iske bawzood ki
maine teen din ka kaam ek din me kar diya tha….Sali, randi….isiliye main logo se
nafrat karta hoon….kyunki wo hai hee isi ke kabil…
“kal raat ko soya nahi toh…yaha office me aankh lag gayi thi…”
“ye…tumhare late aane ka excuse hai…”phhir se mujhpar cheekhte hue wo boli aur
mera matha thanakne laga….wo toh main sokar utha tha isliye thoda shant tha
warna abhi tak toh Rathi ko chod ke zameen par bichha diya hota ….par main abhi
shant tha…matlab gussa toh mujhe aa raha tha, par main shant tha….
“excuse nahi,mam…ye sach hai…”jamhayi lete hue main bola
Mera jawab sunkar Rathi mam ki jal gayi,wo mujhe pakka pel hee deti yadi main
yaha ek engineer ki haisiyat se na hota toh….lekin wo aisa nahi kar saki aur table
par rakhi do files ki taraf ishara karke boli….
“ye do files hai…inki report mujhe kal tak chahiye…”
“bas do…teen kar dijiye…teen kyun…char…abhi toh char ghante office me hee
rahunga toh ek toh yahi complete kar dunga….”bolkar main muskura diya jis-se
Rathi mam ke chehre ka rang thoda badalne laga ….
“nahi,bas do hee files hai…inhe complete kar dena”
“Madarchod…nahi, madarchod nahi….Madharchod….ye sahi rahega iske

liye…thoda vazandar gali….lagta nahi ki main yaha jyada din tik paunga…ye
chudail kha jayegi mujhe….BC kal puri raat nahi soya aur aaj bhi ab sona mushqil
hai….mana ki main yugpurush hoon lekin lawda kya gand hee mar loge is
yugpurush ki, jaga-jaga kar….waise bhi kam sone ki vazah se dimag mera hang
marte rahta hai aur toh aur aaj Aradhna ki aawaz bhi sunayi di…yani ki aage bhi
sunayi degi…upar se aaj main apne neend aur sapne ke beech me kahi phas gaya
tha…wo toh bhala ho school life wale Varun ka jo usne mujhe kheechkar prayer
hall me le gaya,warna mera coma me jana tay tha….khair isiliye toh main…main
hoon…ek raat aur sahi…cigarette aur daru ke bharose toh main apni puri zindagi
kaat doon …ye toh sirf ek raat katne ki baat hai…par kuch bhi ho, Rathi hai badi
Madarchad…madarchod nahi…Madharchod….”
Chapter-7 : Hallucination or Reality
“oh hello…kaha kho gaye…”
“kahi nahi mam,bas aaj kal mera brain ,hang mar deta hai…kahi bhi…..aisa pahle
bhi hota tha…lekin aajkal kuch jyada hee ho raha hai…khair, koyi baat nahi…kal
tak ye files bhi complete ho jayegi”
Jab aap do raat soye nahi hote hai toh kaisa mahsoos hota hai ye bayan karna
thoda mushqil hai…kyunki BC, kuch sahi se mahsoos hee nahi hota….halki si bhi
40
aawaz room me hone par wo bahut der tak kaan me gunjati rahti hai aur aapka
dimag us aawaz ki nakal karta rahta hai,jab tak ki usko koyi dusara kaam nahi
mil jata….lagatar do raat tak jagne ka jo ek nuksan hai usme se ek ye bhi ki chizo
ko mahsoos karne ki aapki Shakti kam ho jati hai….jaisa ki abhi mere sath ho raha
tha….room ka fan on tha,lekin phhir bhi mujhe uski hawa mahsoos nahi ho rahi
thi…main har panch-dus minutes ke baad apna sar pakad kar dabata…khujata aur
phhir kaam par lag jata….beech-beech me mujhe kayi aawaze bhi sunayi
deti…jinme se kuch aawazo ko toh main pahchanta tha par kuch ko nahi…mujhe
kabhi auto ki aawaz sunayi deti toh kabhi train ki….jabki in dono se main is samay
kafi door tha…mujhe aisa lagta ki Varun jag raha hai aur chadar oodhe mujhe
ektak nihare ja raha hai…lekin jab main uski taraf dekhta toh bistar par wo mujhe
sote hue hee milta tha….mujhe kuch pal ke liye aisa lagta… jaise ki bahar bahut tez
aandhi chal rahi hai toh kuch pal aisa lagta jaise ki dharti hil rahi hai….kabhi
mujhe kitchen me mere aur Varun ke aalawa kisi teesare ke hone ka ahsaas hota
toh kabhi kitchen me bartan ke girne ki aawaz sunayi deti….mujhe aisa bhi lagta
jaise ki is ghupp andhere me koyi balcony ke khule darwaje se mujhe jhak raha hai
aur bas mere sone ka intezaar kar raha hai….par main janta tha ki ye sab sirf ek
vaham hai, mere dimag ka vaham…asliyat me toh abhi room ka fan on hai aur is
flat me mere aur Varun ke aalawa teesara koyi nahi hai….ek taraf mere dimag ne
jaha mere andar dar paida kiya tha wahi dusari taraf mere dimag ne hee us dar se
samna karne ki taqat mujhe di thi….kahne ka matlab hai ki main dar toh raha tha
lekin itna nahi ki phati me balcony aur kitchen ka darwaja band karke chup chap
so jaun…warna mere fans kya sochenge….wo toh jeete-jee mar jayenge mujhe is
kadar dara hua dekhkar….yahi sochate hue maine apne laptop ko thoda kinare
kiya aur aankh band karke apna sar dabane laga…ki kisi ke sparsh se mera pura
rom-rom kanp utha…mujhe aisi kapkapi hui ki bas pucho mat… jisne bhi mere
jaangh par hath rakha tha uska dar ab mere andar sama chuka tha….mujhe aisa
lag raha tha jaise ki wo bas mere aankh khulne ka intezar kar raha hai aur mere
aankh kholte hee kuch aisa karega jiski maine kalpana tak nahi ki hogi….isiliye
maine apni aankh nahi kholi aur waise hee ankh band kiye hue leta raha….
Jisne kuch der pahle mujhe sparsh kiya tha ,wo ab ungaliyo se mere jaangh me
taal de raha tha aur har guzarte waqt ke sath mere dil ki dhadkane tez hoti ja rahi
thi…
“Arman, ye sab ek vaham hai…tere dimag ki mangadhat kahani…haqiqat me yaha

tere aur Varun ke siwa koyi nahi hai…”ye sochate hue maine apni aankh kholne ka
nirnay liya
main hundred percent sure tha ki jab main apni ankhe kholunga toh samne koyi
nahi hoga…Yahi sochate hue maine apni aankh ek jhatke me kholi par main galat
tha… mujhe mere samne kisi ka chehra dikha jo apni aankhe badi kiye hue mujhe
ghoor raha tha …maine bina ek pal gawaye apna pura jor lagakar use peeche
dhakka diya aur uthkar kaske ek laat uski chhati par mari….iske baad main use
marta hee gaya ,bas marta hee gaya….lekin wo na toh mera virodh kar raha tha
aur na hee mujhse bachne ki koshish kar raha tha…wo toh bas apna daant fadkar
mar khate hue hase ja raha tha….
“kaun hai…madarchod tu…bol…kaun hai …”uske muh pe laat marker maine

puchha aur jab usne koyi jawab nahi diya toh use phhir se marne laga…
Ye silsila kafi der tak chalta raha…main use marta aur beech-beech me sawal bhi
karta ,lekin usne koyi jawab nahi diya…uske muh aur naak se khoon nikalkar floor
41
par bah raha tha lekin wo tha ki bas haste hue maar khaye ja raha tha aur jab
main use maar-maar kar thak gaya toh wo utha aur balcony ki taraf badha….main
use aur bhi marna chahta tha…main use jaan se marna chahta tha lekin ab
mujhme itni bhi taqat nahi thi ki main kuch bol bhi paun…yaha tak ki mujhe saans
lene me bhi dikkat ho rahi thi isliye puri tarah thak kar main bistar par gir pada
aur thodi der baad jab mujhme kuch himmat aayi toh mujhe kuch shabd sunayi
diye….
“main phhir aaunga….”
Maine apni puri taqat laga di khud ko uthane ke liye aur jaise hee wo balcony se
kuda main bhi uthkar uske peeche balcony se kood gaya…
“bhagta kaha hai lawde, rook…teri maa ka…”bolte hue maine use pakda
Lekin abki baar wo mujhse chhoot gaya aur boundary se chhalang markar Colony
ke sadak par bhagne laga…is samay raat ke do ya teen baje the…jiske karan is
samay full shanti thi…aisa lag hee nahi raha tha ki ye koyi colony hai yani
ghanghor shanti...bhagte hue kayi baar main uske karib pahucha…lekin jaise hee
main use pakadne ki koshish karta wo apni speed aur tez kar deta….jiske karan
mera gussa aur meri raftaar dono lagatar badh rahi thi….par yaha sochane wali
baat ye hai ki main aisa kar kyun raha tha jabki mujhe maloom tha ki wo sirf aur
sirf mere dimag ki ek upaj hai aur tab daudte waqt mujhe realize hua ki main toh
aisa bilkul bhi nahi karna chahta…wo toh bas apne aap hee ho raha hai…jaise ki
kisi ne mujhe command de di ho ki Arman tujhe bas bhagna hai….maine khud ko
rokna chaha lekin mere kadam ruk hee nahi rahe the,main toh bas uske peechhe-
peechhe andha-dhundh bhage ja raha tha….duadte-daudte main colony se bahar
nikal aaya aur ab bhi main us anjaan shaks ka peecha karte hue daud raha tha….
“main rook kyun nahi raha…ye ho kya raha hai…”daudte hue main jor se cheekha
aur khud ko rokne ki tarqeeb sochane laga ki mujhe samne ek ped dikhayi diya…
“Arman…rukne ka sirf ek hee tarika hai…samne wale ped ke paas jab pahuchega
toh us-se takra jana…isase chot toh aayegi ,par atleast tu ruk toh jayega…ok, done
phhir….”
Aur isi ke sath meri ped ke sath jabardast takkar hui.Ped toh ek inch bhi nahi hila
par main takra kar kayi meter door ja gira aur jo shabd mere muh se nikla wo tha
“behanchod”
iske baad maine na koyi aawaz nikali aur na hee koyi pratikriya di….kyunki main
ab iske kabil hee nahi tha….mujhe aisa lag raha tha ki ped se takrane ke karan
shayad mera left wala kandha toot gaya hai lekin phhir bhi main shant wahi
zameen par pada raha aur kuch der baad wahi so gaya…..
.
Subah meri neend surya ki kirno ke mere aankh ke sath hue collision ke karan
khuli aur maine wahi zameen par pade-pade apne aas-paas ke mahol ka jayja
liya….

42
“National Highway 6(NH 6)…jo Gujarat… Maharashtra… Chhattisgarh… odisha…

Jharkhand aur Kolkata ko jodti hai, is samay din ke 7 baje honge…aasman khula
hai ,isliye barish hone ki sambhavna na ke barabar hai….temperature 26 degree
hai aur sadak ke dono taraf ped lage hue hai jiske karan thandi-thandi hawa bhi
chal rahi hai….great ”kahte hue maine apna baya kandha sahlaya…. “not bad…bas
dard hee hai, haddi sahi salamat hai….”
Apne kandhe ko sahlate hue main utha aur jeb se cigarette nikal kar rajnikant style
me muh ke taraf feka lekin mera nishana chuk gaya aur cigarette mere chehre se
takra kar neeche zameen me gir gaya
“main aaj bhi feke hue cigarette nahi uthata ….hhayi…”neeche gire cigarette ko
dekhkar maine khud se kaha…isi beech mera hath mere pant ki jeb me rakhe mere
goggle par gaya aur mujhe maloom chala ki baye kandhe ke sahare ped se takrane
ke karan goggle ke ek taraf ka kanch toot gaya tha….maine ek aur cigarette
jalakar ek lamba kash kheecha aur toota hua goggle pahankar dhua udate hue
River View Colony ki taraf chal pada….
Room me Varun ab tak so raha tha aur use sota hua dekh mera mann kiya ki uske
pichhwade me ek kaskar laat maru…lekin phhir socha ki jane do yar…mujhe neend
nahi aati iska matlab ye thode hee hai ki main dusaro ko bhi na sone
du….:khushnaseeb hai wo log jinhe chain ki neend aati hai yaha toh BC aankh bhi
band karo toh bhoot nazar aate hai:
.
“tu kitne din se nahi nahaya be….”Bathroom se nahakar nikalte waqt Varun ne
pucha aur maine use completely ignore maar diya…matlab na toh uske sawal ka
jawab diya aur na hee uski taraf dekha….main toh is waqt Rathi mam ki di hui do
files ko complete karke facebook chala raha tha….
“tu fb bhi use karta hai…meri photo like kar dena phhir… jo kal maine Sonam ke
sath mall me kheechi thi aur mann kare toh sweetest couple type ke kuch comment
bhi kar dena…”
“done…”
“waise tu fb kyun chala raha hai…”
“ab lawda sab tumko bata du…”
“bata na bhai…”
“ajeeb jabarjasti hai…chal na, tera photo like kar dunga aur sweetest couple wala
comment bhi thok dunga…”
“ye kaun hai…jiski tune profile khol rakhi hai…”
“ye aaya na tu point par….ye Rathi mam hai, Sharda Enterprises ke Nagpur
branch ki manager….soch raha hu friend request bhej du…lekin Sali ne ignore kar
diya toh bezzati ho jayegi…waise tana tann maal hai na…”
“hmmm…shadi ho gayi iski…”

43
“pata nahi…”
“name ke aage kya likhati hai…Miss ya Mrs.”
“Ms. ”
“dhat teri ki…”bolkar Varun mere paas se door chala gaya

tabhi mera mobile bajne laga….maine dekha call Nisha ki thi aur mere receive
karte hee wo boli….
“ye kaise dialer tone hai….Rishte me toh hum tumhare baap lagte hai, name hai
Arman….Amitabh Bachchan ke bade wale fan ho kya…”
“ringtone ho toh Shri Arman ke jaise,warna na ho…”BigB ka ek aur dialogue

chipkate hue maine kaha “toh finally tumhe meri yaad aa hee gayi, do din baad…”
“toh tumne kyun phone nahi kiya…kya ye kahi ka rule hai ki main hee har baar
phone karu…bhagwan ne tumhe bhi mobile diya hai, number dial karne ke liye
hath diya hai aur abki baar toh maine soch liya tha ki main na toh tumse milungi
aur na hee tumhe pahle se call karungi…but I lost once again…”
“so…”
“wo actually, main aur Varun aur Shipra aur Sonam….David ke sath sham ko
dinner par ja rahe hai…toh socha ki tum bhi aana chaho…”
“main ye sab ochhe kaam nahi karta”
“please aa jao na…I love you..love you..love you”
“thik hai…venue sms kar dena…mood hoga toh aa jaunga,lekin phhir yadi mere se
kuch ulta seedha ho gaya toh mujhe blame mat karna…aajkal mere andar koyi
naya virus ghus gaya hai,jiska antivirus dhoondane me mujhe time lagega…”
“don’t worry, main tumhe sambhal lungi…ok bye and thank you…love you…”
“fuck you…”mobile bistar par fek-kar main bola “ye mujhe sambhal
legi…huh…yaha main hee khud ko nahi sambhal pa raha hoon aur ye kahti hai ki
ye mujhe sambhal legi aur BC ye kya chutiyapa laga rakha hai is David ne…lawde
ko lund pakdana hee padega…jab se shahar me aaya hai, Nisha ko mujhse door
kiye hue hai….rook beta tu aaj sham ko mil …itna chodunga ki body se paseena
nahi balki khoon niklega…”
“kya boli Nisha…”Varun ne puchha
“acha toh tum bhi shamil ho…darasal ye tera hee plan raha hoga mujhe bahar le
jane ka…tune socha hoga ki tere bolne se toh main jaunga nahi toh tune Nisha ko
patti padha di…aur toh aur us popcorn killer Shipra aur Jhatu David ko bhi shamil
kar liya…ye jante hue bhi ki mujhe naye logo ke contact me rahna bilkul bhi
pasand nahi…”

44
“Shipra se toh tu mil chukka hai aur rahi baat David ki toh actually kal raat ko
M.B.D. restaurant me meri aur Sonam ki mulaqat David se hui thi…wahi Sonam ne
mujhe David ka introduction Nisha ke childhood friend ke taur par karaya…hum
teeno phhir kafi der tak MBD Restaurant me baithkar idhar-udhar ki baate karte
rahe….tabhi usne mujhe aaj ke dinner ke liye invite kiya toh main mana nahi kar
paya…”
“toh phhir mujhe isme kyun shamil kiya…”
“Nisha ke kahne par…Nisha ne mujhe phone kiya tha ki main tujhe kah du…lekin
main janta tha ki tu meri baat manega nahi, isliye maine ye kaam Nisha ko hee
saunp diya…”
“aur ye bhi bata diya ki mujhe razi kaise karna hai….wah, badi achi dosti nibhayi
tune”
“haan toh isme galat kya hai…tujhe problem kya hai Shipra aur David se….David
ko toh tu janta bhi nahi…”
“asal me mujhe problem Shipra ya David se nahi balki…balki naye logo se milne
me hai…mera matlab kaise log in bade-bade hotel me baithkar badi-badi baate
karte hai…bewazah ek dusaro ko advice dete hai…kisi teesare ki peeth peeche
burayi karte ya politics ka adhura gyan chodte hai….isme se kuch do kaudi ke log
bhi hote hai jo bharat ke itihas ki charcha karte hai aur Mahatma Gandhi ko ulta
seedha bolkar ye dikhate hai ki wo kitne joshile hai…kitni aag hai unke andar aur
yadi paas me koyi unke aukat ka ya unse adhik aukat wala kuch galat kare toh
unme ratti bhar bhi himat nahi hoti ki wo use jakar roke….dar-asal ye log jo ache
,sabhya hone ka dhong karte hai…wo isliye nahi ki kyunki wo aisa karna chahte
hai balki isliye kyunki ye sab karne ka unke paas paisa aur power hai…lekin main
aisa nahi hoon…main har situation…har temperature…har pressure par constant
rahta hoon….na toh main change hota hoon aur na hee meri values….baki sab sale
variable hai…. Upar se main thahra Mechanical department se …mujhe ghutan
hoti hai itni sari ladkiyo ke beech aur jab wo apna muh pout karke selfie leti hai
toh mera mann karta hai ki unke muh me mukka maar du…aur toh aur unke sath
BC unke sath wale ladke bhi aise gand ke chhed jaisi shakl banakar photo
khichwate hai , in short ….i Hate everyone….i…..i….just….hate…..everyone….”
Mujhe nahi pata par Kya kisi ne kabhi gaur kiya hai ki kya matlab hota hai
“GANDU” aur “GAND” jaise sabhya…susheel shabdo ka ? Gandu ko hatao….Gand
par concentrate karte hai…what is its actual meaning….maine bahut sari adult
stories me dekha hai ki kayi bar log is shabd ka kuch is tarah istemaal karte
hai,jaise ki “main uske gand ko kaskar masalne laga….uska gand mere gand se
touch ho raha tha….maine uske gand me lund dal diya jisase wo cheekh uthi…”
Darasal main puchhna ye chah raha hoon ki gand ka asali matlab kya hota
hai…pichhwada ya phhir pichhwade ke beech ka…………………..hm-uh……you got
it…I know you got it. Par main ek Yugpurush hokar ye sab kyun soch raha
hoon…mana ki mujhe hardcore anal sex ka video dekhna pasand hai lekin aisi
baate publicy karna ,kya ye mere jaise mahan insaan ko shobha deta hai ? nahi ?
darasal baat ye thi ki maine abhi-abhi Ms.Rathi ka pichhwada dekha tha aur
confuse ho gaya ki uske us portion ko gand bolu ya nahi….bas isiliye,baki toh main
bedam sharif hoon

45
“excellent…Arman…you’re too good… actually you’re …”
“fantabulous…?”Rathi mam ko word suggest karte hue main apna kaan khujane
laga….
“hmmmm….yes…mujhe toh laga hee nahi tha ki tum ek din pura nahi sone ke
bawzood dusare din bhi apna kaam khatm kar loge…you’re amazing”
“bas mam ”
“today you’re free….jo karna hai karo…jago ya so jao…mujhe koyi matlab

nahi…bas kisi se complain nahi aani chahiye….baki jo karna hai karo…”
“chudai karu teri…”Rathi mam ko dekhkar maine man hee man me kaha aur ek
taraf ishara karte hue puchha ki wo jo us side world cup jaisa kuch rakha hai ,wo
unhe kyun mila tha….
“acha wo…wo toh mujhe promotion ke samay mila tha jab main senior executive se
Manager bani thi tab….you wanna see it”
“why not”
Aur isi ke sath Rathi mam apne ghumaudar chair se uthi aur us cup ki taraf jaane
lagi jispar main mootu tak na…wo toh apun ko Rathi ki gand dekhni thi isiliye
maine us-se us world cup ke bare me pucha tha….Rathi mam ke pichhwade ko bade
gaur se dekhte hue maine khud se kaha “chal beta, aaj raat ke mutth marne ka
jugad ho gaya…”
“acha hai…kitna bada aur mota hai….aur beech me chhed bhi hai ”Rathi mam ke
gand aur cup ko ek sath mix karke maine kaha…
“aisi bhi koyi taarif karta hai..kya ? mota hai , bada hai aur beech me chhed bhi hai
”thoda hairan hote hue wo boli “Arman mere kal ke behavior ke liye…sorry ,thoda
personal problem tha…jiski vazah se main thoda gusse me thi….tumne bura toh
nahi mana na…”
.
Aur tabhich mere Arman Version 2.0 ne mujhe aadesh diya ki main Rathi mam se
cheekh-cheekh kar bolu ki “janeman…bura wo manta hai…jiske paas bur hota hai
aur mere paas toh lawda hai…main bura nahi manta balki bur fad deta hoon…”
lekin maine khud pe control kiya aur Rathi mam ki baat dhyan lagakar sun-ne
laga taki jab main apne mann me isko chodte waqt apna lawda iske muh me dalu
toh main iske muh aur daant ka actual size aur shape soch saku….
“tumne dil pe le liya kya….”
“abey ye toh mera dialogue tha…”chaukte hue maine ek baar phhir khud ko control
kiya aur shant baitha raha…
“ok…Arman…thank you…”

46
“actually mam ,you like my simplicity….i mean I like your simplicity….thank

you”kahte hue main utha aur Rathi mam ke cabin se bahar aa gaya.
.
Aaj ka din mere liye thoda acha tha,kyunki aaj Rathi janeman ne kuch bhi kaam
mujhe nahi diya tha…na hee koyi officework aur na hee koyi homework…jisase
maine ye socha ki mujhe Nisha aur uske dosto ke sath dinner par jana
chahiye….warna mere fans kahenge ki Shri Arman ki social life zero hai….mujhe
aaj office me koyi kaam nahi tha isliye main aaj ek ghante pahle hee bina kisi ko
bataye Sharda Vihar se nikal gaya....
“kidhar jaoge”Sharda Complex ke bahar mujhe khada dekh ek autowale ne pucha…
“tum kidhar jaoge…”
“apun toh kidhar bhi chale jayega,yadi sawari ho toh…”
“Ganga-jamuna chalega kya…”
“par waha ka double charge lagega…police ka lafda hota hai udhar”
((Ganga-Jamuna is the third largest red-light area{brothel} of India,located in

Nagpur))
“kitna lega…”
“waise toh 200 rupaye per candidate leta hai apun ladko ko us chakle me chhodne
ke liye lekin aap single ho isliye 300 rupiya lega…”
“kaha lega….muh me…? itna rate toh waha ke chakle ki chakliyo ka bhi nahi
hai….”
“bade…risk bhi toh apun ko jyada hai…kisi ne dalal samajh ke dhar liya toh panch-
dus hazar gaye jeb se…”
“aisa kya…chal phhir nahi jata….tum bhi kya yaad rakhega ki kis…..oye
auto….”bagal se guzarte hue auto ko aawaz dene ke chakkar me maine apna
dialogue adhura chhoda aur jo autowala mere paas khada tha us-se bola”chal thik
hai bidu…apun chalta hai…par ek din tere khatir zaroor jaunga us red right area
me matlab…red light area me....kya bolta hai tu use…”
“chakla…”
“haan….. us chakle me zaroor jaunga main….”

.
Jab main auto me baitha toh main akela tha…lekin bahut der ke liye nahi aur jald
hee agle chauk se auto me do aur logo ka aagman hua…jisme se ek ladki thi aur ek
uska boyfriend….aisa maine socha…waise toh wo dono bhai-bahan bhi ho sakte
the…ya jija-Sali…ya devar-bhabhi bhi…lekin maine unhe girlfriend aur boyfriend
hee samjha kyunki iski probability jyada thi. Auto me ladka mere bagal me baitha
aur ladki ko usne apne bagal me baithaya…jise dekhkar mera mann kiya ki launde
47
ke muh me thook du,lekin phhir maine aisa nahi kiya aur chupchap earphone laga
kar gana sunne laga lekin thodi der baad hee Vandana Rathi phone ke through
mujhe disturb karne aa gayi….
“Ye BC Rathi…na toh mujhe chain se jeene deti hai…na chain se sone deti hai aur ab
toh BC mujhe chain se gaana bhi sunne nahi de rahi rahi…kya karu…mar jaun kya
ab…ye lawda private naukri hoti hee aisi hai….bhad me gayi ….MC”aur isi ke sath
maine ungali swipe karke mam ko red wale option par lejakar apne mobile se
bahar kar diya…..
Auto me aaj kuch interesting nahi hua aur ek baar toh mujhe auto wale ne aage
baithne ke liye bhi kaha…jiske liye maine shuru me toh saaf mana kar diya lekin
phhir uske request ke karan main maan gaya…
“change mangta apun ko bidu. Sau ki patti toh apun ke paas bhi hai…”
“toh apne us sau ki patti ki batti bana aur daal le….andar”
“change nahi hai bhai….”accelerator ko ghumate hue wo bola….
“chal phhir kal le lena…”
“rook, apun jugad karta hai kuch….” wo auto wala peechhe muda aur baki logo se
kiraya collect karke mujhe dete hue bola “ye le bidu….tere 70 …”
“thik hai…”
“ok…thank you bidu…”
“sala…chaklabaz”jeb me paise rakhne ke baad maine auto wale ki taraf dekhkar

kaha lekin shayad usne dhyan se suna nahi aur kuch reply diye bina hee waha se
chala gaya
River View colony ki taraf chalte hue maine apna mobile nikala aur whatsapp se jo
gandi-gandi photos aur videos download hui thi unhe dekhne laga…. River View
colony ,NH-6 ke thik bagal se laga hua tha lekin mujhe NH-6 se wo 200-250 meters
ka rasta bahut akharta tha…mere mann me khayal bhi aaya tha ki main bike se
Sharda Vihar aaun-jaun lekin meri tharak ne mere is khayal ko darashahi kar
diya…. isliye main office se aate waqt pure raste kuch na kuch karte rahta
tha….abhi main River View Colony ki taraf aate hue ek video hee dekh raha tha ki
ek safed color ki Mercedes mere bagal se sansanate hui nikli aur phhir thoda aage
jakar ruk gayi….lekin mera dhyan ab bhi mobile par tha….main is waqt mobile me
ek desi hot video dekh raha tha aur wo video dekhne me main itna busy tha ki
mujhe abhi mere aas-paas ho rahi ghatnao ki koyi jaankari nahi thi…bole toh
,Arjun drishti aur meri arjun drishti tab tak kayam rahi jab tak ki main khud us
Mercedes ke pichhwade se nahi takra gaya….
.
“bc…kaise beech raste me car khadi kar rakhi hai…”car ke pichhwade se hui meri
takkar ke baad sambhal kar khade hote hue main cheekha aur video ko wahi se
chalu kiya jaha se mercedes ke sath collision ke karan main dekh nahi paya tha….

48
“kya chutiyapa kar raha hai lawda…chod na…BC…. ek toh camera jhat jagah set
kiya hua hai…upar se sirf doodh dabaye ja raha hai.. chhote log abey,lawda
chusa lawdi ko…”
“Arman….”
“ye kaun bola be…”aaju-baju nazar marker main dheere se bola aur jab mujhe koyi
nahi dikha toh maine socha ki ye mera bhram hai….isliye apna lawda khujate hue
aage badh gaya.
“Armaaaan….”abki baar thodi tez aawaz me kisi ne mera name pukara….
“Aradhna…? Lekin uski aawaz toh aisi nahi hai….phhir kaun sa naya character
mere dimag me ghus gaya hai…ek toh lawda waise hee kal raat wala launda ,jise
maine khoob mara…wo bolkar gaya hai ki wo phhir aayega…upar se Aradhna ki
aawaz bhi mujhe aajkal sunayi dene lagi hai….uspar ab teesara kaun aa
gayi….teesara matlab teesari…. matlab abki baar wali aawaz ek ladki ki thi aur
yadi mera sixth sense sahi hai toh….BC kya khak sahi hai…din bhar uzool-fizool ki
chize dikhate rahta hai….”
“Armaaaaaaaaan..”thoda aur intensity ke sath ye aawaz phhir mere kano me

gunji…
.
Aur tab mujhe ahsaas hua ki ye aawaz na toh mere aaju se aa rahi hai… na toh
baju se… aur na hee mere aage se….. darasal ye aawaz mere peechhe se aa rahi thi
aur jab mujhe iska ahsaas hua toh main peeche palta
“iski maa ka ….Rathi Lund….ye yaha kya kar rahi hai…kahi ye mere 1400 gm ke
dimag ki koyi ghinauni kartoot toh nahi…ya ye sach me yaha hai…let me
think…Rathi mam ne mujhe teen baar bulaya aur teeno baar unki aawaz gradually
badhi hui thi yani ki jab unhone second time mera name liya toh pahli baar se
aawaz jyada tej thi aur jab teesari baar mera name liya toh pahle ke dono baar se
jyada tej thi…yani ki normal human behaviour ?….wo mere taraf abhi thoda gusse
se dekh rahi hai…ye bhi normal human behaviour ?…lekin jo sochane wali baat hai
wo ye ki….ye is samay yaha kya kar rahi hai….ye toh meri fan bhi nahi hai…isliye
yaha par mamla gadbadata hai…yani ki ye sirf meri thinking hai….actual me
Rathi mam yaha hai hee nahi….toh kya karu…jaun uske paas ya yahi khade
rahu….”
Main abhi isi soch me dooba hua tha ki Rathi mam ne mujhe apni taraf na aata
dekh car start ki aur meri taraf aane lagi….aur main ab bhi isi confusion me tha ki
Rathi mam yaha par haqiqat me hai ya ye sirf mera ek vaham hai….
“tumhe sunayi nahi deta …bahre ho gaye ho kya…kab se aawaz de rahi

hoon…”mere thik bagal me car rok kar Rathi mam boli….
“dress toh wahi hai subah wali…toh kya ye sach me yaha hai…ek kaam karta
hoon…chhu kar dekhta hoon…lekin kal raat jab main use maar raha tha tab bhi
toh main use chhu hee raha tha…yani ki iski koyi guarantee nahi hai ki touch wali
feeling se meri is samsya ka solution nikal jayega…lekin phhir bhi ek baar touch
kar hee leta hoon… ”

49
maine car ke window par rakhe Rathi mam ke hath ko ek baar dheere se chhua aur
jhatke se turant hata liya…. “real lag reli hai…” bolte hue maine dusari baar ahiste
se Rathi mam ke hath ko chhua aur confirm karne ke liye teesari baar Rathi mam
ke hath ko touch karke sahlane laga…
“tum ye kar kya rahe ho..tumhara dimag toh sahi hai na…”
“yes……..i mean, no….yes….actually main check kar raha tha ki aap haqiqat me ho
ya ye sirf mera……you know”
“fallacy…”
“hmmm”
“tum psycho ho kya…”
“use hatao…aur mujhe batao ki yadi aap real ho toh aap yaha kya kar reli ho…”
“kar reli….”haste hue Rathi mam boli…
“ye le…iska toh itne me hee gand fat gaya…iska tab kya hoga jab main lambe-
lambe dialogue marunga…tab toh has-has ke iske gand se pani nikal jayega…mera
matlab choot se pani nikal jayega”
“tumne kuch kaha kya…tumhare honth silent mode me fadfada rahe hai…”
“mera lund ,jyada fadfada raha hai…”silent mode me hee apne honth fadfadate hue
maine kaha…
“again…”
“aapne mere sawal ka jawab nahi diya ki aap yaha mere peechhe kyun aayi hai…”
“oh hello, main tumhare peeche nahi aayi hoon, River View Colony me mera flat
hai, E-5 aur mujhe maloom hai ki tum yahi rahte ho….A-3 flat me….”
“ab fas gayi na,janeman…..tum haqiqat me nahi ho…ha…ha…ha…”daant fad ke

haste hue main bola ,jiske baad Rathi mam bhi hasne lagi….lekin phhir haste hue
achanak wo ruk gayi…
“ek minute….abhi kya bola tumne mujhe….”chehre ka rang laal karte hue usne
meri taraf dekha
“chal na…jab tu yaha hai hee nahi toh main tujhse kyun daru…mere khud ke dimag
me itna bhav kha rahi hai…chal nikal…”
“tumhari himmat kaise hui…”
“nahi toh kya karegi…ek-do files aur de degi….huh…Shri Arman ke liye wo

punishment nahi balki baye hath ka khel hai….tu apne real version me sochati hogi
ki tu dhada dhad files mujhe dekar mujhe pareshan kar rahi hai…bitch
please....yadi dena hai toh 7-8 files de…ye teen-char files toh main mutth marte hue
50
complete kar deta hoon….aur aise kya dekh rahi hai, maregi kya mujhe…le
maar…ye tera office nahi hai jaha tu mujhpar raub jhadegi…ek ulte hath ki padegi
na toh……...khair chhod”bolte hue maine apna wahi ek side se toota hua goggle
lagaya aur phhir cigarette jalate hue bola “ab mujhe kya jhak reli hai…chal khisak
le dabi me…”
.
Itna bolkar main waha se jaane laga lekin mujhe andar hee andar mahsoos hua ki
maine Vandana Rathi ki insult karne me apna sau pratishat nahi diya hai, isliye
main wapas Vandana Rathi ke paas jakar ek lamba kash kheencha aur dhua
Vandana Rathi ke muh par fek kar bola “tu abhi tak idharich hai…chup chap nikal
le…warna ek mukka marunga na toh ek mahine tak dard dega….”
Chapter-8 : The Dinner
Girlfriend- ye ek hee word kafi hai un logo ko jalane ke liye ,jinke paas ye nahi hoti
aur ye ek hee word kafi hai un logo ko dilasa dene ke liye jo iske chakkar me
chutiya bane hai…ab log kahenge ki Shri Arman ,ladkiyo ki izzat nahi karta….Shri
Arman , sexist hai…. toh mera logo se kahna hai ki…haan ,hoon main sexist .jo
ukhadna hai ukhad lo….i see women as sexual objects….koyi pyar nahi…koyi
chutiyapa nahi….sirf chudai…actually main kahna ye chahta hoon ki zindagi kitni
simple hai lekin hum ise pyar ke chutiyape me padkar complicated bana dete
hai…dusare shabdo me……zindagi kitni simple hoti yadi hum pyar ke chutiyape me
nahi padte toh….aur isi karan main Nisha ko jhel raha tha…warna kab ka Aradhna
ki tarah nikal kar fek diya hota….
Lekin Nisha ko jhelne ki sirf yahi vazah nahi thi…dar-asal kabhi-kabhi wo mujhe
achchhi lagti thi.isiliye main use abhi tak apni girlfriend banaye hue tha….lekin
mujhe ye bilkul pasand nahi ki main apni girlfriend ke liye dikhawe ki zindai
jiyu….matlab un jagah par jaana jaha main jana nahi chahta…us tarike se jeena
jaise main jeena nahi chahta…wo sab movie actual me dekhna jise dekhne ki
kalpana shayad main sapne me bhi na karoon….. yahi vazah hai ki main aur Nisha
aajkal jyada nahi milte….jaha ektaraf main usase pareshan hoon toh dusari taraf
wo mujhse…lekin phhir bhi hum dono aise dikhate hai jaise ki hum kitne khush
hai….mujhe yaad nahi ki Nisha ne last time mere sath coffee kab pee thi….shuru-
shuru me toh mujhe laga ki ye sab uske naraz rahne ke karan ho raha hai…lekin
jab us din usne M.B.D. restaurant me mere sath jane ke bajay David ke sath film
dekhne jane ka decision liya tab mujhe thoda shaq hua aur maine Nisha ke bartaav
me aaye parivartan ko gaur karne laga aur tab main is conclusion par pahucha ki
hum dono ki relgadi ab kisi bhi samay patri se utar sakti hai aur ho na ho….is
kaam me uska dost David zaroor humari relgadi ko patri se neeche dhakka dene ka
kaam karega….main sab janta tha, main wo sab kuch mahsoos kar sakta tha jo ki
Nisha mere bare me aajkal sochati hai…lekin main phhir bhi kuch nahi kar raha
tha aur kyun nahi kar raha tha….kyunki ye sab mujhe bahut boring lagta
hai…yani ki mujhe pasand nahi hai…..khair is waqt Varun mere samne badhiya
suit pahan raha hai aur main is samay bhi yahi soch raha hoon ki ….main dinner
par jaun ya nahi…
“chal na taiyar ho…”

51
“Nisha ko bol dena ki mujhe thoda kaam aa gaya tha office me…isliye main nahi aa
paya…”
“itna simple bahana…wo bhi Shri Arman ke case me…maza nahi aaya….chal jaldi
se taiyar ho aur by the way main koyi jhooth nahi bolne wala…”
“toh thik hai…main bol deta hoon…”
“sale sharam kar…wo nahi hoti toh devdas banker sadak par ghoom raha hota
Disha ki yaad me…”
“Esha ”
“haan,wahi…Esha ki yaad me…aur tu uske liye uske dost ke sath dinner me nahi ja
sakta…jaha main khud bhi hoon tere sath…”
.
Aur tab suddenly mujhe realize hua ki kis halat me main Nagpur aaya tha…jaise
mera koyi wazood hee na ho…log mere aas-paas se guzarte toh the lekin mujh par
unka koyi effect nahi dikhta tha…main jaha ek baar baith gaya toh ghanto wahi
baitha rahta aur pura din sirf apne ateet ke uljhano me khoya rahta tha….mere
college ke aakhiri din main muskurane ki acting kar raha tha aur aise behave kar
raha tha jaise ki mujhe koyi fark hee nahi padta…lekin fark pada tha…jisme Esha
aur Gautam ne milkar char-chand laga diye the….seriously I miss Rajshri Pandey,
hostel…my friends….fights between hostlers and other college students…. Esha….
Anchoring…. aur tabhi mujhe S.P. yaad aaya aur uske sath me Aradhna aur wo
sab kuch jo maine Aradhna ke sath jeete hue kiya aur wo sab kuch jo uske marne
ke baad mere sath hua….maine phhir bhi khud ko sambhala aur final semester ka
exam diya aur chahta tha ki Esha mere sath rahe…lekin aakhiri exam ke din usne
bhi…………..leave it.
.
aksar mere man me ye khayal aata hai ki bhagwan kyun mujhe wo sab kuch nahi
de deta jo main chahta hoon…jise paane ke liye maine mehnat ki…jiske liye main
tadpa aur phhir main un logo ko dekhta hoon jinke paas wo hai aur tab main
samajh jata hoon ki wo log…wo chize jinhe main pana chahta tha…wo mere layak
hee nahi thi…
.
“dekh Arman last time puch raha hoon ….chalega…”
“hmmm…chalo, chalte hai…mera kya bigdega”bolkar main utha aur taiyar hone
laga…
.
Ek bade hotel me jaane ka baki kya fayda hota hai, ye toh mujhe nahi pata par ek
jo fayda mujhe hamesha dikhta hai wo ye ki aisi jagaho par maal bahut hoti
hai…waitress se lekar customer tak….sab fad maal hoti hai aur aisi jagah par main
aur mera hathiyar hardum taiyar rahte hai….hathiyar se mera matlab hai mere
muh se….aapne kya samjha ?

52
“tumne kuch order nahi kiya, Arman…”mujhe dekhkar David ne kaha aur
suddenly mujhe ahsas hua ki mujhe bhi kuch order karna chahiye.
“jo Varun ne order kiya same wahi”Shipra ki taraf muskurate hue dekhkar main
bola “aur do char kilo popcorn…”
“Nisha…dekh ,Arman phhir se mujhse kaise baat kar raha hai…”
“main tujhse baat hee kaha kar raha hoon…aur jo sach hai wo sach hai…tu accept
kyun nahi kar leti ki tune us din 500 ka popcorn akele khaya tha”
“very funny”
Sab kuch thik tha…sab kuch normal hee chal raha tha ,jab tak ki David ne mujhe
toka nahi…..
“Nisha ne bataya tha mujhe ki ,tum Vegetarian ho…par sharab bahut peete ho”
“kyunki mera aisa manna hai ki kisi aur ki jaan lene se behtar hai ki main khud ki
jaan le loon….kya main galat hoon ? ”
“toh tum kahna chahte ho ki tum humse…yaha baithe har shaks se behtar ho
kyunki tum nonveg nahi khate….hmmm….tab toh mujhe afsos ke sath kahna
padega ki tumhari soch kitni chhoti hai”
David ke aisa bolte hee mere bagal me baithe Varun ne mera hath dabaya ,yani ki
wo indirectly mujhse kah raha tha ki main David ko koyi jawab na du…mann toh
mera nahi mana lekin socha ki …hatao yar,jane do lavde ke baal ko….
Mere kuch na bolne ka asar positive raha aur David ne aage kuch nahi bola
,shayad Nisha ne bhi uska hath daba liya hoga….aisa maine andaza
lagaya…maine gaur kiya ki table par baitha har wo shaks jise main ache se janta
tha ya sirf janta tha wo sab bilkul shant the…yani ki aadat ke mutabiq Shipra apna
muh nahi fad rahi thi…Sonam Varun se ishq nahi lada rahi thi aur Nisha mujhse
baat nahi kar rahi thi aur David… jab se main aaya hoon tab se wo ya toh sirf
mujhe ghoore ja raha tha ya meri harqato par comment pass kar raha tha…khair
,main use nahi janta isliye uske bare me kuch nahi bol sakta lekin baki
teen…wo,itne chup kyun the….aur ye BKL David mujhe kyun ghoore ja raha
hai….abhi lawda fek ke marunga toh pura khandan chud jayega…..aur jab maine
apna dimag daudaya toh dekha ki Shipra David ko kuch ishara kar rahi thi…jiske
baad David ne mujhse turant ek sawal kiya….
“tum ek engineer ho”
“Mechanical Engineer…”
“tum kaam kaha karte ho”
“Sharda Vihar”
“ye kaha hai”
“sorry….Sharda Enterprise…”
53
“kamaal hai,maine toh aajtak name bhi nahi suna”kahte hue David hasne laga aur
uske sath Nisha , Shipra aur Sonam bhi has di aur tab mujhe samajh aaya ki ye
darasal in charo ki milibhagat hai….
.
“acha toh ab puri kahani samajh aayi mujhe….maine Sonam ki insult ki…phhir
Shipra ki insult ki aur Nisha ki toh main aaye din karta hee rahta hoon aur ye
teeno mujhe aaj tak jawab nahi de payi isliye inhone David ke sath milkar mujhe
neecha dikhane ka plan banaya hai…ab samajh me aayi ye kahani….Sonam aur
Shipra ka toh samajh me aata hai,lekin Nisha bhi…… that’s why I hate
everyone”Nisha ki taraf dekhte hue maine socha…..
.
mujhe ab bhi yakin nahi ho raha tha ki Nisha aisa kar sakti hai…..khair yahi toh
antar hai mere jaise yugpurush me aur in jaise chhote insano me….kahi isme
Varun bhi toh shamil nahi hai ….? Maine Varun ki taraf dekha toh wo is samay
thoda gusse me tha ,jiski vazah shayad yahi thi ki David ka yun mera Mazak
banaya jana ,use kuch khas pasand nahi aaya tha….yani ki jaise Nisha ne mujhe
chutiya banaya tha waisich Varun ko Sonam ne chutiya banaya tha…aur tabhi
mujhe apni wo baat yaad aayi jisme maine kaha tha ki…Girlfriend- ye ek word hee
kafi hai un logo ko jalane ke liye jinke paas ye nahi hai aur ye ek word hee kafi hai
un logo ko dilasa dene ke liye jo iske chakkar me chutiya bane hai…aur yaha wo
chutiye main aur Arun…matlab main aur Varun the…..
“tum aksar shant kyun ho jate ho…kahi tumhe aisa toh nahi lagta ki main tumhara
Mazak uda raha hoon ,actually main aisa hee hoon….main dil ki baat jubaan par le
hee aata hoon….tum chaho toh Sharda Enterprise chhodkar ,mere sath meri
company me kaam kar sakte ho….aur tumhari salary hogi 30000 per
month….mujhe nahi lagta ki Sharda Enterprise tumhe isase jyada salary degi”
“thirty thousands per month….yuck….itne me tohmeri naukrani bhi kaam na

kare”bolkar Shipra has padi aur main khud ko control karne laga ki nahi beta
Arman…nahi…in logo ke muh nahi lagna inhe kya pata teri mahanta ke bare me….
.
Maine us waqt jab Shipra mujhpar has rahi thi toh gaur kiya ki Varun ne mera
hath chhod diya tha yani ki wo ab chahta tha ki main un sabko jawab du…lekin
maine apne mann ko bhatkaya aur apne hee khayalo me kho gaya…is beech Varun
bahana markar waha se jana bhi chaha lekin Sonam ne use apni kasam dekar use
rok liya….pata nahi wo log Varun ko kyun rok rahe the…kyunki khushi toh unhe
meri bezzati karne se mil rahi thi….
“Arman tumne jawab nahi diya ki…tum meri company join karoge ya nahi….”
“done…tees hazar me done…thank you…yugpurush_arman@india.com me call

letter bhej dena… ab khush”
“peon ki post hai….manzoor hai kya”kahte hue David has diya….Sonam aur Shipra
bhi hasi lekin main sirf Nisha ko dekh raha tha….wo bhi is samay mand-mand
muskura rahi thi....wo kayi baar toh apni hasi rok leti lekin kayi baar uski hasi aisi

54
mand-mand muskano ke roop me samne aa jati thi….jise dekhkar main bhi

muskura deta tha….
“toh tum taiyar ho meri company me subah-sham jhadu marne ke liye…”
“sorry…darsal baato hee baato me main kahi aur khoya hua tha , you know… ek
busy person ke paas faltu logo ki baato ko sunne ka time nahi hota lekin phhir bhi
wo faltu tuchiye log bakar-bakar karte rahte hai toh mujhe unki haan me haan
milana padta hai…abhi tak main wahi kar raha tha lekin ab main pure tarike se
yahi hoon aur kuch der rahunga bhi toh jo puchhna hai ab puchho….chalo start
karo puchhna”
“tum jhooth bol rahe ho…tumne humari sari baate dhyan se suni aur uska jawab
bhi diya lekin ab bol rahe ho ki tum kahi khoye hue the….ye kaise mumkin
hai”Shipra boli
“MTL hoon main yani ki multi talented ladka…ye toh kuch bhi nahi main toh
khoye-khoye tujhe ek jhapad bhi maar sakta hoon , jiske baad tu bhi kho jayegi…
try karegi”
“Shipra ko chhodo ,mujhse baat karo…..newton ka third law lagao aur humne tum
par jo action liya hai uska reaction do…newton ka third law…jante bhi ho ya
nahi…kamal hai…science ke student hokar third law of newton nahi jante….main
batata hoon every action has equal and opposite reaction….”
“wow David…. You are so smart…mujhe ye rule likh kar do na…taki main bhi
Arman ko ye rule bol saku”David ki taraf dekhkar Shipra boli
“actually, main khoya hua tha ek facebook post me….maine kal facebpook me ek
post dekha tha… ek image….koyi jpeg file thi shayad…jo ki kisi nami page ne post
kiya tha...jisme do image ko combine kiya gaya tha….ek image thi om sybol ki…om
matlab om…shankar bhagwan wala om”hawa me om banate hue maine kaha“aur
dusari image par number likha gaya tha 786….aur us image ke upar likha gaya tha
ki om ke liye like kare aur allah ke liye comment…dekhte hai kaun jeet-ta
hai…yakin nahi manoge us page par barah lakh logo ne like kiya tha aur shayad
itne hee logo ne comment…. Maine us pic ko dekha aur usme like aur comment ho
rahi sankhya ko dekhkar mere mann me vichar aaya ki kitna free time hai logo ke
paas….upar se yadi comment section me jao toh aise aise shabd ek dusare ke
religion par kiye hote hai ki unhe main bata nahi sakta…bata nahi sakta
kya…main toh soch bhi nahi sakta….bas isi vazah se mujhe socially hona pasand
nahi hai kyunki main aksar logo se disappoint ho jata hoon… ab aaj ke dinner ko
dekh lo, main jab se aaya hua hoon tab se tum log mera Mazak uda rahe ho, lekin
maine kuch kaha….nahi na ….kyunki main janta hoon ki tum logo ki aukat hee
yahi hai…group me baithkar kisi ki hooting karna….i just hate everyone…aur
David , tu mujhe Shri newton ka third law padha raha hai…abey ullu yadi tune
apne 8th semester ki book….sorry 8th semester kaha se aa gaya, teri toh aukat hee
nahi ki tu Engineering ke 8th semester tak pahuch paye…yadi tune apne school ki
class 8th ki science ki book ko thik dhang se padha hota toh tujhe samajh aata ki
newton ke third law me action aur reaction alag-alag body par hota hai lekin
tu….tune toh naya rule hee nikal diya…action aur reaction ko ek hee body par thok
kar…tujhe toh award milna chahiye…chutiya award…ya phhir ghanta award…ye
hua first point….aur dusara point ye ki tune newton ke third rule ke base par
55
mujhse kya bola ki main tujhe apna reaction doon….abey gandul, newton chacha
ne kaha tha ki action aur reaction alag-alag time par nahi…usi samay hota
hai….toh yadi maine usi samay , jab tum log mera Mazak uda rahe the ya Mazak
udane ki koshish kar rahe the toh yadi usi samay main tumlogo ko ek-do mukka
mashak deta ya phhir tum logo ke muh me thook deta tab wo hota newton ke third
law wala reaction….isliye agali baar se ye rule kahi ghusadne se pahle yaad
rakhna ki Shri Arman ne kya kaha tha….BC tum jaise log hee ,bachpan me 2+2 ke
jawab me 6,7 likhkar aksar murga bana karte ho….aur Shipra tujhe newton ka
third rule chahiye….taki tu mujhe bata sake….tujhe pata hai, tum jaisi ladkiyo ko
dekhkar main kya sochta hoon….main sochta hoon ki….tumlog is duniya me kyun
aayi…matlab koyi career nahi…koyi knowledge nahi…tum jaise…tum jaisi se
matlab tum teeno jaisi ladkiya bas baap ke paise ke dum par 23-24 saal tak aish
karti hai phhir shadi kar leti hai….bas life khatm….BC isase achchhi life toh River
View Colony ka kutta-Bisleri jeeta hai…kyunki afterall uski koyi respect hai…uska
koyi role hai…tum logo ka kya role hai ?…baap ke paise par aish karna…? Tum
logo ko zara sa bhi andaza hai ki tum logo ko dekhkar tumhare maa-baap kya
sochte honge ? apne dosto ke samne kitni sharam aati hogi unhe ye bolne me
ki…meri beti, kuch nahi karti…wo toh bas chhachhundar ke mafiq idhar se udhar
din bhar ghumte rahti hai….shame on you, girls….shame on you….”kahkar maine
ek lambi saans li aur pani peene laga….paani peene ke baad maine ek Dakar mari
aur Shipra ki taraf dekhkar bola“aur janeman, kya haal hai….aglI baar kisi padhe
likhe ko le aana mujhse muqabala karne ke liye…toh main chalu, ya kisi aur ko
koyi aur baat karni hai…Nisha…?Sonam….?Shipra…..? itni shant kyun ho tum
teeno…lagta hai mere baaton ko tumne dil pe le liya…dil pe hee lena warna kahi
aur logi toh kahi aur se baat bahar niklegi…badi aayi, third law of newton explain
karne wali…. toh main chalu….David bhaiya ? main jaun ya aap mujhe koyi aur
naya offer denge ya koyi science ke rule samjhana chahe toh main ruk sakta
hoon…basharte aapne un rules ko ek anpadh…bepakal insaan ki tarah na padha
ho….”
Meri baat ka waha baithe sabhi logo ne bur maan liya tha aur Varun ke reaction
ko dekh-kar mujhe ahsas hua ki maine jyada bol diya hai….Shipra ki halat toh
rone jaisi ho gayi thi…Sonam aur Nisha bhi gumsum gumsum thi….
“dekha ho gaya na kabada…mujhe chhedte hee kyun ho, phhir..mana ki currently

main version 3.0 par chal raha hoon…lekin iska matlab ye thodi hai ki Version 2.0
ke ek bhi features nahi honge…mere dimag me version 1.0 aur 2.0 ka backup
hai…jise main jab chahu tab install karke tum sabki fad sakta hoon..that’s Shri
Arman for you…bitches”
“main soch raha tha ki ” un sabka kaam tamaam karne ke baad main waha se
jaane ke liye khada hee hua tha ki David bol pada“Arman tum baat kar rahe the
kisi fb pic ki, jisme kisi famous page ne kuch objectionable material post kiya tha
,jiske karan tumne us post ko like karne wale ,us post me comment karne wale
lakho logo ko galat samajh liya….ye kis hadd tak sahi hai…kya yahi tumhari aukat
hai….kya tumhari thinking itni giri hui hai ki tumne us page par like,comment
karne wale sabhi logo ko galat maan liya…jabki galti sirf us pic ko post karne wale
ki thi…tumhe pata hai humare uchi society me log tum jaise insaan ko kya kahte
hai…narrow minded…iska matlab bhi pata hai tumhe…narrow minded…”

56
“abhi tune thodi der pahle science ka rule mujhse pucha tha, usase santusti nahi
hui kya…jo tu ab science se koodkar English me aa gaya….abey tune mujhe samajh
kya rakha hai…khair jaane do…”
“ok leave it…lekin tu ye toh zaroor manega na ki tu narrow minded hai… tum jaise
log hee terriorist jaisi chizo ko badhawa dete hai”
“lol…gay please”
“let me finish… tum ek baar socho aur phhir mujhe batao ki galti kiski thi…us fb
post me…use post karne wale ki ya use like/comment karne wale ki”
“dono ki… darasal mera aisa manna hai ki….chutiya banana buri baat nahi hai,
chutiya banna buri baat hai….sorry lesbians for my foul language… kya karu,
dialogue book me yahi likha tha ”
“toh tum ye kahna chah rahe ho ki us pic ko like karne wala har shaks chahe wo
chhota ho ya bada…chahe wo nasamajh hee kyun na ho…wo sab bure hai…ab ye
mat kahna ki unme se koyi innocent nahi raha hoga…”
“bahut ho gaya,ye vad-vivad…main chalta hoon”ghadi me time dekhte hue maine

kaha…
“toh tum haar gaye…”
“nahi”
“toh phhir ise complete karke jao….jise tumne shuru kiya hai…warna apni haar
swikar karo aur hum sabse dus-dus baar sorry bolo”
Chapter-9 : Deterioration of Brain
“hmmmm….lagta hai tum logo ko completely finish karna padega….taki aaj ke

baad mere samne khade hote hee tumhara paani nikal jaye….”wapas baith kar
main bola“toh kaha the hum…haan us fb post par…jaha tumhare according kuch
innocent log bhi the jinko duniyadari ki samajh nahi thi……toh yadi deeply analyse
kiya jaye humari baato ko toh tum yahi dekhoge ki tum ek-do ache insan ke avaj
me sau bure logo ko bacha rahe ho aur main sau bure loge ke karan us ek ache
insan ko bhi nahi baksha raha… aur yadi aur deeply analyse kiya jaye humari
baato ko toh tum paoge ki hum dono hee galat hai….par tum mujhse jyada galat
ho….darasal main ye kahna chah raha hoon ki hum sabhi galat hote hai par sawal
ye hai ki kaun jyada aur kaun kam….aur rahi baat us ek ache insan ki toh….. ye
toh natural law hai…gehu ke sath ghun bhi chudta hai….so shut the Ferrous
uranium….i mean fuck up”
Dusare din subah subah mere mobile par Nisha ka sms aaya ki….aaj ke baad wo
meri shakl bhi nahi dekhna chahti hai….maine ye baat Varun ko batayi toh wo
thoda sad ho gaya…afterall dosti toh nibhani hee thi aur usi dosti ke karan Varun
sad hone ka natak kar raha tha….ya sachmuch me sad tha ?…mujhe nahi
pata…maine mobile me aaya hua sms Varun ko dikhaya…toh wo bola
57
“kal raat bahut reaction pe reaction pel raha tha na, ab jhel ye reaction….ab ro
baithkar”
Jiske jawab me maine kuch nahi kaha aur table par rakhe goggle ke sath cigarette
ke packet ko uthakar balcony ki taraf chup-chap aa gaya…maine cigarette jalayi
aur kash marne hee wala tha ki mujhe yaad aaya ki procedure toh ye nahi
hai…procedure ke mutabiq mujhe pahle goggle pahanna chahiye uske baad phhir
cigarette jalani chahiye….maine jali hui cigarette ko kuch der dekha aur phhir
balcony se neeche fek kar goggle lagaya aur dusari cigarette jalaya….
“hat BC , bahut rahis hoon main…mujhe kisi ki zaroorat nahi hai…”
“kamal hai, Shri Arman bhi udas hote hai…mujhe laga tha ki ye pyar….mohabbat
ke chutiyape me padkar tu kabhi udas nahi hoga”room ke andar se hee mujhe
taana marte hue Varun bola“chal thand rakh…Sonam se baat karke tera patch up
karwa dunga main”
“abey, main wo nahi soch raha , jo tu soch raha hai ki main soch raha hoon…main
toh isliye udas hoon kyunki ye bhi koyi tareeka hai break up karne ka…ki bas ek
sms kar diya aur break up…mera matlab koyi gali nahi koyi galauch nahi…ye toh
insult hai meri…mujhe dekh maine kitne style se Aradhna se break up kiya tha aur
utne hee style se Esha ne mere sath….lekin Nisha ne toh KAPD kar diya..”
“acha toh tu chahta hai ki ,Nisha pure society me announce kare ki usne tujhe apni
zindagi se nikal feka hai”
“ye sab chhod… wo tu kya bol raha tha ki Sonam ke through tu mera patch up
karwa dega…yadi aisa hai toh main abhich Sonam ko sorry bolne ke liye taiyar
hoon…wo bhi live….bol kya bolta hai”Varun ki taraf cigarette aur lighter fek kar
main bola “soch le…tera kitna name hoga…log kahenge… gaur se dekhiye is shaks
ko…yahi hai wo shaks ,jisne Shri Arman se sorry bulwaya ,wo bhi ek ladki ko….log
toh tere diwane ho jayenge aur ladkiya tera lund chusane ke liye tere peeche
bhagengi….aur tera boss….tujhe”
“ho gaya na be….”meri baat ko beech me katkar Varun ne kaha“chal main try
karta hoon…lekin pahle tu Sonam ko call karke sorry bol”
.
Maine apne mobile ka front camera on kiya aur video recording start karke sorry
bola lekin mujhe usme kuch khalipan sa laga yani ki kuch adhoora adhoora
sa…aur jab maine aas pass dekha toh mujhe samajh aaya ki maine goggle nahi
pahna hai…kamal hai , mujhe jaha tak yaad hai , usme toh maine abhi do minute
pahle hee goggle pahna tha..phhir ye kaise mumkin hai ? anyway maine goggle
pahna aur ek baar phhir se video mode me camera on kiya..
“hiii…Sonam…Good morning…may god give you all the good and bad things you
want today and sorry for last night…I know you and your beautiful ,intelligent
friends will give me mercy…ok bye, have a bad day…I mean good day…love you
from Varun” video record karke maine mobile Varun ki taraf fek kar kaha“is video
ko jaha bhejna hai bhej de….main chala Sharda Enterprises ”

58
Kal raat ko David ke dinner aur subah Nisha ke break up messege ke karan main
ek baat toh bhool hee gaya tha…jo ki is samay mere liye sabse jyada important thi
…wo ye ki kal mujhe River View Colony ke bahar jo Rathi mam milI thi wo haqiqat
me thi ya wo mere dimag ka koyi jhol tha…yadi wo mera vaham hua toh phhir thik
hai…lekin yadi wo sach me Rathi mam niklI toh phhir main toh gaya kaam se….
Sharda Vihar pahuch kar main chupchap apni seat par jakar virajman ho gaya
aur mere virajman hone ke kuch samay baad hee mere computer ke paas rakha
telephone baj utha….aur jaisa ki mujhe ummid thi call Rathi ki thi…usne mujhe
apne cabin me aane ka nyota diya…jiske baad maine soch liya ki “ yadi aaj jyada
hawa me udegi toh isko bhi zameen pe le aaunga…. bhad me gayi naukari….Shri
Arman ko naukari ki kami hai kya….huh”
Ms.Rathi ke cabin me ghuste hee mere hosh udd gaye kyunki aaj wo jo tight dress
pahan kar aayi thi use dekhte hee nano second me mera lund tight ho gaya…waise
toh Ms.Rathi ko maine aaj tak sirf formal me dekha tha lekin aaj wo pata nahi
kaun sa dress pahan kar aayi thi…jisme kandhe tak toh kuch tha hee nahi aur
kamar ke paas elliptical shape me uski dress ka kuch hissa gayab tha…jis-se Rathi
mam ki gori…chikni kamar ka kuch hissa mujhe dikh raha tha… mera sara gussa
Ms.Rathi ko dekhkar chhoo-mantar ho gaya…aaj Rathi mam kuch jyada hee saj
sawar kar aayi thi…isliye main bahut der tak bina hile dule…bina saans liye ektak
sirf aur sirf use dekhta raha…mera matlab…isko chodne ko pa jaun toh mera
jeewan safal ho jaye…lekin ye janeman ,aaj formal dress me kyun nahi aayi….kya
Sharda Enterprises ke kayde ispar lagu nahi hote….yahi fayda hai manager hone
ka…
“tumhare kal ki badtameezi ke liye main tumhe baad me sabak sikhaungi…filhal

mujhe abhi Sharda Enterprise ke General Manager Shivakant Sehgal ko receive
karne jana hai…isliye main abhi jaa rahi hoon aur khabardar yadi kal ki tarah
samay se pahle ya kisi ko inform kiye bina gaye toh”kahte hue Ms.Rathi ne apna
bag uthaya aur waha se chalti bani….aur meri nazar unke matakte hue gand aur
kamar par ja atki….jiske baad mere muh se anayas hee kuch shabd Rathi mam ki
tariff me nikal pade
“tujhe na chodu toh chain mujhe aata nahi hai,

Ek tere siwa koyi aur lund ko bhata nahi hai…”
Rathi mam ke jaane ke baad main wapas apni jagah par aakar baith gaya, jaha
office me kaam karne wala peon jo ki meri hee umra ka tha meri table par chay
rakhte hue bola…
“kya , Arman bhau…kidhar chale gaye the tum kal….Rathi madam bhadak relI thi
bahut”
“tu mujhse aap kahkar baat kiya kar be…warna kisi din pel dunga…samjha”
“kya Arman bhau…apun ko laga ki apun dono firand hai…isliye aapko tum
bola,warna ricard hai Jagat ka ki,usne kabhi is office me kisi sahib aur madam ko
bhav tak nahi diya”
“ye kya hai be…thandi chay leke aaya hai…ja dusari leke aa”

59
“are kya bhau…thik hai apun laata hai,lekin aapko apun ka ek kaam karna
padega”bolkar Jagat ne pahle idhar udhar dekha aur phhir dheere se bola“mujhe
wo walI fillum chahiye”
“bhag lawde yaha se…warna abhi shikayat kar dunga”
“kya bhau…bhav kha rele ho…do na”
“chal beta kalti ho ja…”
Mujhe Sharda Vihar me kaam karne se koyi dikkat nahi thi balki Sharda Vihar aur
Rathi mam ki badaulat main aksar bore hone se bach jaya karta tha lekin iska
nuksan bhi tha ,wo ye ki office me kaam na hone ki vazah se main bore bhi hone
lagta tha aur ye jo boring word hai, isase main duniya me sabse jyada nafrat karta
hoon…insano se bhi jyada.
Yahi haal aaj ka bhi tha,balki aaj haal kuch jyada hee behal tha…baki din toh
Rathi mam ki gand ka sahara bhi tha ,lekin aaj toh wo bhi nahi thi…I mean aaj toh
lawda… lawde hee lag gaye…upar se Vandana mam ki dhamki alag…Vandana
mam se pichha kaise chhudaya jaye ? aisa kya karu ki Vandana mam wo wali baat
puri tarah se bhool jaye…
Inhi pareshaniyo se joojhate hue main chair par pura pasar gaya aur upar chhat
ki taraf dekhne laga…chhat se mera matlab hai ceiling…maine dekha ki ceiling ek
do jagah se crack hai aur ek jagah usme shayad black ya green color ka daag bhi
tha….mujhe karne ko kuch toh tha nahi ,isliye main us daag ko hee dekhne laga
aur jaise-jaise main use dekhta gaya ,mere dimag me kayi aakritiya aane lagi wo
ceiling ka hara dhabba chamakne laga aur uski chamak itni tez thi ki meri aankho
me chubh rahi thi….kayi aakritiya mujhe ceiling par madrati hui dikhayi
di….maine us chamakte hare rang se honi wali chubhan ko rokne ke liye apni
aankh band kar li…lekin meri aankh ab bhi chubh rahi thi jaise maine apni aankh
band hee na ki ho…mera pura sharir bahut jor se kanpne laga….itni jor se ki mere
dono hath pair buri tarah kaanp rahe the aur daant aapas me takra rahe the..main
apni aankhe kholkar ye dekhna chahta tha ki BC ye kya bala hai lekin jab maine
apni aankhe kholi toh main kahi aur tha…maine apni aankh kholi toh paya ki main
toh apne ghar me tha…jaha mujhe Vipin bhaiya ki aawaz sunayi de rahi thi…
.
“papa,aapne Arman ko kaha tha ki wo Varun ke sath na ghoome lekin maine kal
Varun ke sath hee Arman ko dekha tha bus-stop par…..”
“uthne de usko ,abhi batata hoon main…”ek kadak aawaz ke sath mere papa ji ne
kaha ,jo mere kaano tak bhi pahuchi…..
“subah se hee shuru ho gaye ye baap-bete…pata nahi kya dushmani hai

mujhse”badbadate hue maine bistar chhoda
Us din jyada kuch khas nahi bola mere papa ne…bas mujhe ek bar aur warning di
ki main yadi Varun ke sath ghoomte ya baat karte hue paya gaya toh meri aisi-
taisi kar denge…..pata nahi kya problem hai in sabko Varun se ? khair main taiyar
hua calender me taarikh dekhi….23 sept. 2009

60
“bhai yar , tujhe ek baat batani hai…”prayer ke dauran apne aage baithe Varun ko
kochakte hue main bola
“Bulla bhai ,idhar hee round maar rahe hai aur unhone tujhe mujhse baat karte
hue dekh liya toh, wo tujhe toh kuch nahi kahenge lekin mujhe thapadiyate hue
kahenge ki nalayak disturb karta hai…school ke sabse ache ladke ko….”bina
peeche mude Varun ne kaha
“sun toh sahi”
“na bhai…”
“bhag sale…ab bolna ki Reema se setting karwa de…”
“kaun se jamane me jee rahe ho gurudev…Reema se meri setting ek mahine pahle

hee ho chuki hai…kal hee toh bataya tha tujhe ki maine use uske ghar jakar kiss
kiya hai”
“yani ki last time main ek mahine pahle aaya tha”badbadate hue maine apni
aankh band ki aur prayer me wapas lag gaya….
.
Ye shayad dusari ya teesari baar tha jab main apne version 1.0 me pahucha
tha…aur main ye janne ko bahut utsuk ho chuka tha ki kya main yaha jo bhi
karunga kya wo mera past change kar dega aur kya mujhe mere ateet ki dusari
hee kahani bayan karega…mera matlab yadi maine abhi apne hath ko chaku se
kaat liya toh kya next time jab main yaha aaunga toh kya mere hath me chaku ka
wo nishan rahega ya phhir aise hee sirf aaj tak ke liye hee wo nishan simit
rahega...23 sept. 2009 mujhe ache se yaad hai ki aaj ke din recess time me meri hee
class ka ek launda bathroom me cigarette peete hue pakdayega jiske baad uski
khoob pelayi hogi….isliye mere paas bahut se mauke the ye check karne ke liye ki
yadi main yaha koyi changes karu toh haqiqat me kya hoga…..
“haan ab bol…ki kya bol raha tha prayer ke time…”prayer hall se class ki taraf
aate hue Varun ne mujhse puchha
“main tujhse kahna chahta hoon ki…ki……nahi yar tu sochega ki main tujhe
bewkoof bana raha hoon…jo ki main tujhe hardum banata hoon ”
“bolega bhai”
“main tujhse kahna chahta hoon ki main is waqt se nahi hoon….matlab main
Arman hee hoon lekin pata nahi main yaha kaise achanak aa jata hoon..”
“chal be…subah se kuch aur nahi mila kya…kal tu class me mujhe bol raha tha ki tu
future dekh sakta hai aur aaj bol raha hai ki tu future se hee aaya hai…”
“abey kal maine waise hee kah diya hoga ,sixth sense ke dum par….lekin aaj main
sachmuch me future se aaya hoon”
“aisa toh phhir ye bata ki”class me baithe laundo ki taraf dekhte hue Varun ne
puchha“aaj kise bulla class ke bahar bhejega”
61
“abey ye chindi sawal mujhse tu kyun puch raha hai…main tujhe bade kand ki
information deta hoon…wo bhaisa hai na C section me”
“kaun wo kariya…jisase kutte ki tarah baas aati hai”
“haan wahi…kariya…wo aaj lunch ke samay cigarette peete hue pakda

jayega,jiske baad school ke sare teacher use gher kar marenge aur ”mera itna
bolna tha ki aas-paas ki deewaro me vibration hona shuru ho gaya…jisase main
samajh gaya ki ab mera ant samay aa gaya hai...lekin itni jaldi ?…pichhali baar
toh kafi time tak main yaha tha. Ab main ye kaise maloom karunga ki yaha change
kiya hua incident vastav me bhi change hota hai ya nahi….
Initially mera plan ye tha ki main recess me us ladke ko bathroom me cigarette

peene nahi dunga jisase wo na toh teachers ki pakad me aayega aur na hee school
me halla hoga aur next time jab main yaha aaunga toh Varun se puchh lunga ki
kya wo launda cigarette peete hue pakdaya tha….ispar yadi Varun ka jawab na
rahega toh main samajh jaunga ki cheeze badal rahi hai lekin yadi Varun ne haan
kaha toh samajh jaunga ki mera yun yaha aana sirf aaj ke liye valid hai…main jo
karunga wo sirf aaj tak ya phhir kahe ki sirf mere dimag tak hee simit rahega… in
sabka vastavikta se koyi lena dena nahi hai aur phhir River view colony me jakar
Varun se finally confirm kar lunga…warna directly puchhne se wo mujhe pagal
samjhega…lekin abhi achanak vibrate hoti dewaro ne mera sara plan chaupat kar
diya tha ye aisa tha jaise ki prakriti mujhse kah rahi ho ki…. na munna na…tum jo
ho chukka hai use badal nahi sakte….
“Varun sun dhyan se…2011 me India world cup jeetegi lekin 2015 me semi final me
haar jayegi…ab tu ye yaad rakhna…chal jaldi se bol ke dikha”
“2011 me india world cup jeetegi lekin 2015 me semi final me haar jayegi…”
“right…bas tu ye yaad rakhna aur next time main tujhse jab bhi puchhu toh mujhe
bata dena…aur sale agli baar jab Reema ke ghar jayega toh dhyan se kand karna
kyunki uska bhai tum dono ko pakad lega aur Gandhi jayanti ke agle din Bulla
surprice test le….le…leeee….lega”apna sar dabate hue main bola“isliye taiyari kar
lena kyunki Bulla hum dono ko alag……alag…….”
.
“iski maa ka….koyi zandu balm lao be” haqiqat me aakar apne sar ko dono hath se
thok kar main bola
mere dimag ki ulool zalool harqato ke karan hee main aajkal vartman samay me
honi wali kayi ghatnao ko yaad nahi rakh pa raha tha aur kisi bhi chiz ko mujhe
bar-bar remind karna padta tha jaise ki aaj taarikh kaun si hai…aaj din kaun sa
hai…abhi thodi der pahle kya hua tha….kal kya hua tha. Yani ki mere common
sense ki aajkal full baji padi thi aur aisa hee kuch abhi ho raha tha…maine aankh
band karke kuch der tak socha aur tab mujhe samajh aaya ki main is waqt Sharda
Vihar me hoon aur mere samne ye ladka jo mobile hath me pakde hue khada hai
uska name Jagat hai….

62
“Jaggu…ek cup”ungali dikhate hue maine use kaha…jiske thodi der baad hee Jagat
chay lekar aa gaya
“wo yogi ji bol rahe hai ki apna mail dekh lo…”
Maine Jagat ke hath se chay ka cup liya aur bina kuch responce diye apna mail
kholne laga…lekin Jagat wahi khada raha…
“Arman sir…wo wali video do na”
Aur uske itne bolte hee maine gusse se bhari tirachhi nazar se use dekha jiske baad
wo chup chap waha se khisak liya……chay ki siskiya….. mera matlab chay ki
chuskiya lete hue maine mail se juda attachment download kiya jisme machine
parts se related dimensions vagerah thi…..
“hat behanchod”eka-ek us attachment ko close karte hue main bola“ab ye mujhe

chodna sikhayenge…”lekin phhir dusare hee pal maine attachment ko khola aur
kaam par lag gaya
.
Sharda Vihar se room aate waqt mera mobile baja…auto itna pelam-pel bhara hua
tha ki mujhe apna mobile nikalne me kafi dikkat ho rahi thi aur mobile nikalne ke
dauran mera hath mere bagal me baithi ek ladki ke jaangh se touch ho
gaya….mujhe use sorry kahna chahiye tha, lekin mobile nikalne ki jaldbazi me
maine use kuch bhi nahi kaha…jisase shayad wo bur maan gayi aur wo boli….
“idiot…andha hai kya”
“haan ,bol Varun”us ladki ko bina koyi jawab diye main bola lekin Varun shayad
kisi se baat kar raha tha jisase mujhe kuch background aawaze sunayi di….
“ye article ,Mishra ko de dena aur bolna ki maine bhijwaya hai aur….aur Ganga-
Jamuna wala article yahi rakh do…pahle main check karunga…ab tum jao”
“bolega be….”
“haan Arman…ek khushkhabri hai tere liye”
“bak”
“Sonam tere sorry wale video se bahut khush hui aur usne Nisha ko mana liya
hai…aur unhone bhi tujhe sorry bola hai”
“pakka”
“haan…”
“chal phhir ,bye…abhi auto me hoon toh aawaz saaf nahi aa rahi”Maine call
disconnect ki aur mypics pe jakar Nisha ki photo par click kiya
“idhar dekh oye…”thodi der pahle mujhe idiot aur andha kahne wali ladki ko
aawaz dete hue maine kaha“ye meri girlfriend hai,jise main bhav tak nahi deta…ab
63
khud ko dekh”front camera on karke uski photo usi ko dikhate hue maine
kaha…“khud ko dekh aur compare kar meri girlfriend se…tujhe lagta hai ki main
jaan buchkar waisi harkat karunga…matlab jab mere paas five star hotel ka ras
malayi hai toh main ek third class dahi bade par apna hath kyun marunga… tujh
jaisi ladkiyo ko main dekhta toh kya thookta bhi nahi hoon…aur ab chup hee
rahna warna aisi bezzati karunga ki itni garmi me body se paseene ki jagah aansu
niklenge…got it”
Auto me baithi us laundiya ko bhapka dekar main colony ki taraf badha…waisi toh
mujhe abhi bahut problems thi lekin sabse badi jo problem thi wo ye ki kaun si
problem sabse badi hai….? mere dimag ka yun ajeeb harqat karna…ya Nisha se
mera breakup ya phhir Vandana mam ki dhamki…main kispe jyada concentrate
karu…kisko pahle solve karu aur kaise solve karu ?
Vandana Rathi ne aaj mujhe office me warning dekar meri tension aur badha di thi
aur mujhe aisa lag raha tha jaise ki ab mera dimag fat jayega... .main toh aaj
Vanadana mam se milne ke pahle tak yahi soch raha tha k kal sham ko office se
aate waqt meri jo unse River View colony ke bahar mulaqat hui thi wo mera
hallucination tha lekin aaj Enterprises jakar pata chala ki wo hallucination nahi
balki sach tha…main sach me Vandana Rathi se kal Colony ke bahar mila tha…
lekin wo yaha kya kar rahi thi ? par gaur karne wala jo mudda tha wo ye ki pahli
baar maine kisi real incident ko bhram mana tha , mujhe toh kal pura yakin tha ki
Rathi mam se meri asal me koyi mulaqat hee nahi hui thi…
“toh iska matlab ye hua ki halat aur kharab hote ja rahe hai, ab mujhe haqiqat aur
apne dimag ke dhokhe ko pahchan karne me bhi dikkat ho rahi hai…Vandana
Rathi toh ab jo karegi , wo karegi hee… lekin ab meri fatne wali hai…mujhe ye ho
kya raha hai..pahle neend gayab hui aur ab haqiqat bhi gayab hote ja rahi hai…
mujhe ab aage se ahtiyat bartna hoga kisi se baat karte samay….sixth sense ke toh
lavde lag hee gaye the ab toh baki bacha kucha sense bhi pata nahi kaha chala
gaya ”
Yahi sab sochate-sochate main colony ke gate ki taraf badh raha tha ki meri nazar
colony ke park me padi…waisi mere aas-paas kya ho raha hai ,kaun kya kar raha
hai…main is par jyada dhyan nahi deta…lekin park ke andar dekhte-dekhte meri
nazar ek ladki par atak gayi, jiski umra mere jitney hee rahi hogi…wo ektak mujhe
waise hee dekhe ja rahi thi jaise ki main use dekhe ja raha tha…hum dono ki
aankhe ek-dusare par bilkul constant thi yani samay ke sath koyi parivartan
nahi…..mujhe kuch samay laga us ladki ko pahachan-ne me…aur jab wo mujhe
pahchan me aayi toh maine ahiste se apni nazar us-se hatakar samne ki taraf kiya
aur teen tak ginti ginkar apne flat ki oor pura dum laga kar bhag khada hua….
“ye toh Aradhna thi BC…ye pakka hallucination hai…hundred percent…lekin kahi
wo sach me hui toh ?.......”maine khud se sawal puchha aur phhir khud par hee
jhalla kar kaha“bitch please….usko mare hue ek saal ho chuke hai aur use yadi
atma ban kar tujhe darana hota toh ek saal ke gap me nahi aati…balki usi samay
teri fad deti jab tu college me tha….”
64
“yani confirm hai ki wo mere dimag ki upaj thi”khud se sawal puchhate hue main
badbadaya aur room ka gate kholkar andar aa gaya…
“isme bhi koyi shaq hai kya…jail wale kand bhool gaya kya…shame on you”
“wokay…no problem…main iska koyi na koyi solution nikal hee lunga……yadi time
mila toh ”
.
“abey Arman , uth…ye had ho gayi be…room ke andar kyun nahi gaya…chal uth”
“kaun hai be..disturb mat kar, warn pelunga…waise bhi neend aati nahi aur jab
aati hai toh tum log utha dete ho…mujhe samajh nahi aata tum log ko dikkat kya
hai mujhse…na sale chain se jeene dete ho…na chain se sone dete ho…ab kya mar
jaun main,tab thandak milegi tum logo ko…”
“abey uth kar dekh toh sahi…tu soya kaha hai…”mujhe wapas jor se hilate hue
usne kaha….
Aur abki baar mera matha itni jor se thanka ki main teji se utha aur uthkar seedhe
Varun ka collar pakad liya
“bosedk fod dunga,bata raha hoon…aukat me raha kar”hath bandhkar maine use
bola…
Ye sab suddenly hua tha ,mujhe ye maloom tha ki samne Varun hai lekin phhir bhi
maine aisa kiya matlab maine kiya nahi wo toh aise hee apne aap ho gaya……
mujhe hosh me aane me kuch samay laga…jiske baad main muskurane laga and
trust me…mera muskurane ka koyi mann nahi tha…abhi toh bilkul bhi nahi….
“fad acting karta hoon na main”Varun ka collar chhod haste hue maine kaha
“acting…ye sab acting thi…tu room ke bahar sham ko 7 baje ghas par so raha hai
aur mere jagane par mujhe marne par utaru ho jata hai aur ab bol raha hai
ki…kaisi lagi meri acting”
“ approximately ”bolte hue main phhir muskuraya
Par wo muskan sirf Varun ka mood thik karne ke liye tha, asal me main andar se
bechain hua ja raha tha ki main yaha kaise aaya…maine toh room ka darwaza
khud apne hath se khola tha aur kayi cigarette peekar stubs ko dustbin me goal bhi
kiya tha…phhir main yaha kaise …kaha aur kab ?
“ab andar chalega, ya yahi ghas par sokar phhir se apni acting dikhayega ”naraz
hote hue Varun bola aur andar chala gaya

65
Varun ke andar jaane ke baad maine ek nazar aas-paas mari aur ye confirm kiya
ki koyi mujhe dekh toh nahi raha hai phhir maine achanak hee apne pant ki zib
kholkar lund bahar nikala aur bola“aao salo…gand nahi fad diya toh bolna”
Raat hote hee logo ki dinbhar ki mehnat unpar hawi hone lagti hai…lekin mere
sath thik iska ulta hota hai , raat ko 11-12 baje mere sharir ke andar energy peak
par hoti hai,jaise main kayi ghanto ki neend lekar baitha hua hoon aur aaj bhi
kuch aisa hee ho raha tha….khana khane ke baad main bistar par leta hua deewar
par tangi ghadi ko dekh raha tha…main second ki sui ko observe kar raha
tha...mera mann ho raha tha ki main Varun ko sab bata du…mera mann kar raha
tha ki main Varun ko apne us time travel ke bare me bata du, jo aksar mera dimag
mujhe karate rahta hai….lekin problem yaha bhi wahi thi ki Varun mera yakin
nahi karega aur jaisi aajkal meri harqate hai… waise me Varun toh kya yadi Arun
bhi hota toh wo bhi mera yakin nahi karta….Arun kya… main khud nahi
karta…lekin tabhi mujhe kuch sujha aur maine Varun se pucha…
“Varun, kya school me maine kabhi tujhe kaha tha ki, main future se hoon…”
“tune toh ye bhi kaha tha ki tu avatar hai kisi bhagwan ka…”apne laptop ki screen
ko jhukate hue usne mujhse kaha….
“wo toh maine aise hee kah diya hoga…ye bata kya maine kabhi tujhe kaha tha ki
2011 world cup india jeetegi aur 2015 me india semi final me haar jayegi”
“dekh Arman disturb mat kar…waise hee sala ye Ganga-jamuna ka matter mere
hath me dekar meri aisi taisi kar di hai agency walo ne….”
“yani Na…ok, mujhe bas yahi janna tha”
Itna bolkar main wapas deewar par tangi ghadi ko dekhne laga aur har baar jaise-
jaise second ki sui hilti main count karte jata….ab mera pura dhyan counting par
tha….main hazar-hazar ke sets me counting kar raha tha…taaki counting ekdum
correct ho aur mujhe asani ho…maine hazar-hazar ke kayi sets complete kiye aur
jab maine thak kar counting band ki toh hazar-hazar ke kul 17 sets the…yani ki
17000 seconds….yani ki sadhe char ghante se bhi adhik samay tak main sirf second
ki sui ke movements ko ginta raha…..wow…… fantabulous !
.
Nisha…mujhe aksar shabd kam pad jate hai is shabd ko describe karne me…main
soch me pad jata hoon ki ,kaisi iski tareef karu…jis-se ye khush rahe aur mujhe
barabar deti rahe ….main soch me pad jata hoon, kaise aur kya karu ki iska dil na
toote ya ise bura na lage aur isi soch-soch me mujhe aksar koyi aisi tarqeeb mil jati
hai jisase main, Nisha ki utar deta hoon………..izzat…. matlab mera intention toh
sahi rahta hai lekin result sahi nahi nikalta…ab isi samay ko hee le lo….jab aaj
Nisha mujhse milne MBD me aayi toh maine use 'hi…' karne ke liye hawa me hath
uthaya tha lekin maine 'hi..' nahi kiya maine apna hath upar hawa me uthaya aur
Nisha ko middle finger dikha di….ye sab ekdum achanak se hua tha aur iski maine
kalpana bhi nahi ki thi…lekin maine ye kiya tha aur paap toh paap hota hai ,chahe
jaan buchkar kiya gaya ho ya anjaane me…

66
“toh ye tarika hai tumhara hi kahne ka…koyi galatfahami me mat rahna ki mujhe
tumhari yaad aa rahi thi ya aur kuch…main yaha isliye aayi kyunki mujhe Sonam
ne kaha tha…”
“sorry for middle finger…wo main karna nahi chahta tha ,bas suddenly… instantly
…mujhse ho gaya…trust me.”
“kal raat tumne thik nahi kiya Arman , tumne hum sabko abuse kiya….”
“wah…tum karo toh cool, hum kare toh fool..I agree ki maine kal raat thik nahi
kiya lekin thik toh tum logo ne bhi nahi kiya tha…kya tum logo ka plan mujhe
bulakar sabke samne insult karne ka nahi tha…tum logo ne mere khilaf
shadyantra racha…tum charo ne milkar mere liye chakravyuh ka nirman kiya…ab
maine arjun ke mafiq chakravyuh tod diya toh isme meri kya galti hai…ye toh
mera parakram hai…”
“thik hai manti hoon ki , humne tumhe insult karne ka plan banaya tha…lekin ek
limit ke andar…lekin tumne toh hadd hee kar di…seedhe hum sabke family
members par pahuch gaye tum….do cup cold coffee…”order marte hue Nisha boli…
“ek hee lana main nahi piyunga…”waiter ko aawaz dekar main bola “There is no
limit to what I can do…. aur tum logo ne kya kiya, wo Varun , sala mujhe bol raha
tha ki main uske office me peon ki naukari kar sakta hoon…tumhari saheliya
mujhpar khullam-khulla has rahi thi…ye galat nahi hai…aur kya name hai us
bewkoof ka….hmm…Shipra ,wo mujhe newton ka third law padhane wali
thi….sorry par ye tumhare liye limit me hoga…mere liye bahut jyada hai aur main
katayi bardasht nahi kar sakta ki meri koyi insult kare ,wo bhi mere dost ke
samne….mere fans kya sochenge , Aur by the way tumne David ko kya koyi
turram khan samajh liya tha jo mere samne le aayi usko…tumhe mere level ka
andaza bhi hai ki main kya hoon…main kaun hoon…main bhagwan hoon, mera
janam nahi avatar hua hai…main nayi duniya bana sakta hoon…us duniya me
sadak,building yaha tak ki insano ko bana sakta hoon…ek ko toh maine bana bhi
liya hai…tumhe andaza bhi hai ki main time travel bhi kar sakta hoon apne tez
dimag ke through….aur aise me tum mera muqabala karne kise le aayi….us David
ko…aur usne field kaun sa chuna…Physics ?. Par tum yaha ye baat karne nahi aayi
ho…dar-asal main kahna ye chahta hoon ki galat hum sab hote hai...par sawal ye
hai ki kaun kam. Kal dinner ke time par galat tum log bhi the aur galat main bhi
tha…”
“toh iska faisala kaise hoga ki,kam galat kaun hai…”coffee ka cup uthakar Nisha
ne kaha aur phhir halki halki chuskiya leni lagi…
“jo sorry bol de…jo ki main bol chuka hoon”
“sorry…”cup neeche rakhte hue Nisha boli aur apne purse se paise nikal kar table
par rakh di…
“rahne de..main de dunga bill…warna ek naya mudda utha legi ki Arman ,tumne
kabhi mujhe coffee bhi pilayi hai…kya”
“sach…”thoda khush hote hue Nisha ne kaha “aaj kafi samajhdar maloom pad rahe
ho…”

67
“haan,kyunki kal sapne me apna jack sparrow aaya tha”
Iske baad Nisha kuch nahi boli aur main use dekhta raha…maine kayi baar Nisha
ke behaviour ko observe kiya aur reading note ki jiska mean nikal kar main is
nateeze par pahucha ki hum dono hee kitne fake hai…kahne ko toh hum dono
boyfriend-girlfriend hai lekin pichhale do-teen mahino se humare beech aisa kuch
bhi nahi hua jisase ye lage ki hum dono wakayi me boyfriend-girlfriend hai…maine
observe kiya ki Nisha shayad ab ek mauke ki taalash me hai…wo mauka jiske
buniyaad par wo mujhse door ja sake...is tarah ab ye relationship puri tarah
mujhpar depend karta tha ki main use wo mauka du ya nahi….chhote log
hamesha mauke ki taalash karte hai lekin mere jaise brahmand vijeta ,jab jo karna
ho…kar dete hai.
“toh main chalu…”jab thodi der tak main kuch nahi bola toh apna bag kandhe me
latkate hue wo boli….
“aaj raat ko free ho kya….”
“common Arman, tum toh aise behave kar rahe ho jaise….jane bhi do….haan free
hoon…”
“main soch raha tha ki , main tum logo ko ek chhoti si party du…mere job lagne ki
khushi me…tum sab ise meri apology bhi samajh sakte ho”
“really…”apni aankhe badi karte hue Nisha boli “mujhe toh yakin hee nahi ho raha
hai…Shri Arman aur apology party….”
“kaha na ki kal sapne me Jackie dada aaye the…wahi pirates wale”
“ok…ab mujhe acha lag raha hai…thank you Arman…”uthkar Nisha ne kaha
“fuck you…I mean…love you”
“love you too…Arman….take care”apne hontho par muskan lakar Nisha boli aur
waha se chal di
“Sali fake…just like me”
Chapter-10 : 24 Hours
MBD se nikalkar main colony ki taraf chal pada aur chalta hee raha…bahut der tak
chalte rahne ke baad maine gaur kiya ki sadak khatm hee nahi ho rahi hai…raasta
to maine apne room tak jaane wala naapa tha par main room nahi pahuch raha
tha…room kya ,main toh colony ke gate tak bhi nahi pahuch paya tha aur ab
achanak se jis sadak par main chal raha tha wo mere liye anjaan ho gayi thi…main
kidhar jaun aur kidhar na jaun mujhe kuch samajh hee nahi aa raha tha…maine
apne aas-paas dekha…waha bahut sari sadak ab apne aap ban rahi thi ,jo ki ek-
dusare ki same to same copy thi aur ek dusare se randomly kahi se bhi judte ja rahi
thi…jinpar se bahut sari gaadiya tez raftaar ke sath gujar rahi thi aur jab koyi
gadi tez raftaar ke sath mere paas se gujarti toh mera dimag jhanjhana
68
jata…maine dekha ki in sadko ka koyi normal pattern nahi tha…ye toh bas
randomly ek dusare se judati ja rahi hai…kayi sadak toh mere aankho ke samne
ban rahi thi…apne aap.jaise kisi ne koyi jadu ki chhadi ghumayi ho aur tabhi mere
paas aakar ek school bus ruki…
“abey, Arman…bheeg kyun raha hai…jaldi andar aa…”
“kaun…kya abhi baarish ho rahi hai ”
“abey andar aayega…School nahi jana kya…”
“School…kaun sa school…kya main ek teacher hoon…? aur ye Arman kaun

hai..mera name Arman hai ?”
“andar aayega ki nahi tu…”ek dusari kadakdar aawaz mere kaano me padi jiske
karan main us aawaz ki taraf dekhe ko mazboor ho gaya…wo school bus ka
conductor tha shayad…confirm, wo school bus ka conductor hee tha….ya phhir
nahi tha.
Maine apne aap ko wahi khade rahkar upar se neeche tak dekha aur paya ki main
ek school uniform me hoon…aur baarish me puri tarah bheeg gaya hoon…lekin ye
barsaat kab hui ? aur yadi hui bhi toh mujhe pata kyun chala ? aur ye jhat barabar
launde mujhe jaldi se andar kyun aane ke liye kah rahe hai ? inki maa ka…
wait….kahi main phhir se toh….shit
“are yar…phhir se past me…pata nahi main real me kaha hoon…”bus ke andar aate
hue main gusse se bola
Mujhe thoda samay laga ye janne me…ki actually mere sath ho kya raha hai.par
mujhe chinta is baat ki thi ki main haqiqat me kaha hoon…kyunki mujhe itna toh
yaad hai ki Nisha ke jane ke baad main bhi MBD restaurant se bahar nikal aaya
tha lekin apne room tak nahi pahucha tha…yani ki main Restaurant aur apne
room ke beech kahi behosh pada hua hoon…?
“BC mujhe yaha se bahar nikalna hoga…warna koyi mere upar gadi chadha kar
nikal jayega….”
Maine gaur kiya ki bahar bahut tez baarish ho rahi thi aur us baarish me main bhi
bheega hua tha,jiska ahsaas mujhe ab ho raha tha…. yani ki apne aankh me paani
dalkar toh main wapas haqiqat me nahi ja sakta tha…kyunki main already pani
me bahut bheega hua tha aur ab bhi yahi tha…isliye maine apne sar ko thodi der
sahlaya aur mere aage wali seat ke peechhe jo lohe ka handle laga hua tha uspar
apna sar de mara…
“kamal hai…kuch nahi hua…lagta hai ,force kam pad gaya” kahte hue maine ek
aur baar apna sar us lohe ke handle me de mara lekin nateeza ab bhi wahi tha…aur
main ab bhi wahi tha…maine do-teen baar aur try kiya…lekin har baar sirf mera
sar hee dard deta…

69
“kyun be…mutth marne ka side effect ho raha hai kya..jo apna sar baar-baar patak
raha hai…”mere bagal wali khali seat me baithkar Varun bola
“tu bhi yahi hai…”
“jaha tu…waha main..”
“gay… waise …aaj date kaun si hai…”
“19th Sept. 2009….”
“ye nahi ho sakta….”apni aankhe fadkar aur full chauk-kar main bola…jiska karan
ye tha ki last time jab main yaha aaya tha toh Varun ne mujhe 23 Sept. ki date
batayi thi aur aaj wo 19th sept. bata raha tha….yani ki past me past…kya
chutiyapa hai yar….
Last time main jab aaya tha toh Varun ko maine ye bataya tha ki ‘ Indian cricket
team 2011 me world cup jeetegi aur 2015 me semifinal haar jayegi’…taaki main ye
check kar saku ki main past events me interfere kar sakta hoon ya nahi….aur mera
plan tha ki jab main agli baar apne School life me Varun se milunga toh us-se ye
puchkar confirm kar lunga…lekin ab samay ne apna naya khel shuru kar mujhe
aur peeche dhakel diya tha...upar se main yaha kab tak rahunga ye bhi mujhe nahi
pata tha…ispar se reality me main kaha pada hua hoon iski mujhe alag hee tension
ho rahi thi…
“Arman…”
“hmm….”
“Armaaan…”abki baar thoda cheekh kar Varun ne mera name pukara
“chillata kyun hai be….wo bhi kaan ke paas”
“ek bahut zaroori baat karni hai tujhse…”
“time nahi hai…main khud bahut pareshan hoon…aur ye jhat barabar launde…jo
bus me aage baithe hai…wo halla kyun kar rahe hai…inki toh main…”
“sun na bhai…”
“bak…”
“wo Gaurav hai na…Gaurav…”
“D section wala,Gaurav…wahi na tera dost…”
“dost mat bol MC ko…”
“kyun be…kal tak toh tu aksar uski tareef karta rahta tha…aaj kya hua…” apna sar
dabate hue Varun ki taraf dekhkar maine puchha…lekin Varun chup raha…

70
Varun mujhse kuch kahna chahta tha…lekin uski jeebh atak rahi thi. Matlab wo
mujhse kah nahi pa raha tha…aur jab wo mujhse nahi kah pa raha tha yani ki
abtak toh usne is bare me kisi se jikra tak nahi kiya hoga…
“le kaan me bol de…”apna sar thoda aur Varun ke karib lejakar maine kaha…jiske
baad Varun ne apni mutthi bheechi aur bahut speed ke sath ek saans me sab kuch
bol gaya…ek saans me ? nahi actually usne ek baar beech me saans liya tha…ya
phhir do baar…?
“main kal sham ko cricket khelne gaya tha aur mom-dad bhi ghar par nahi
the….main Gaurav ko apna dost manta tha aur wo aksar mere sath mere ghar
aaya karta tha…aur kal jab main cricket khelkar ghar wapas lauta toh dekha ki
Gaurav ,meri behan Mahi ke sath mere ghar me tha...Gaurav ko yun apne ghar me
dekh mujhe ajeeb laga…bahut ajeeb laga..lekin mere kuch puchhane se pahle hee
Gaurav boundary koodkar waha se bhag gaya….”
.
Do you Remember the first law of friendynamic ? created by me….let me remind

you…dost ki maal = dost ki behan…yani ki dono ko line marna mana hai….lekin
yaha toh D section wale Gaurav ne jise Varun apna dost manta tha usne sirf line
hee nahi mara tha balki aur bhi bahut kuch mara tha…School pahuchkar maine D
section me jakar dekha…Gaurav abhi school nahi aaya tha…lekin prayer hall me
mujhe Gaurav dikh gaya….mann toh mera usi samay use thokne ka tha lekin phhir
maine khud par control kiya aur jab prayer khatm hui toh main Varun ko lekar D
section me gaya…waha D section ke aur bhi ladke the…jinme se kuch Gaurav ke
dost bhi the….lekin mujhe unse koyi matlab nahi tha aur na hee mujhe unki koyi
parvah thi…main…Varun ke sath seedhe Gaurav ki bench ke samne gaya..jaha wo
baitha hua tha….mujhe ,Varun ke sath dekhkar Gaurav samajh gaya ki main yaha
kyun aaya hoon…
“kaise be..”Gaurav ka thobda pakad kar main bola…
“sorry bhai, galti ho gayi….”dheemi aawaz me Gaurav ne Varun se kaha…
“galti….ye le…”bolkar maine sabke samne Gaurav ko ek tamacha kheechkar diya…
us waqt mujhe pata nahi kya ho gaya tha…jab se maine Gaurav ki is harqat ke
bare me suna tha…tab se mera khoon jal raha tha…mujhe aisa laga jaise ki Gaurav
ne Varun ki behan ke sath nahi balki meri behan ke sath wo sab kuch kiya ho…aur
Gaurav ko waha apne samne dekh main sirf yahi nahi rooka….mere ek tamacha
marne ke baad wo mujhe bhi marne ke liye utha…lekin wo thik se khada bhi ho
pata us-se pahle hee maine uske seene me ek laat jad di…jis-se Gaurav wahi
ladkhada kar peeche neeche gir gaya…aur mujhe maa-bahan ki gali dete hue jor-
jor se rone laga…uske rone ki aawaz se main itna jaan gaya tha ki ab school ke
teachers zaroor aayenge…yani ki main fasne wala to tha hee toh maine socha ki
kyun na ise puri tarah markar khatm kar diya jaye…isliye pahle toh maine neeche
gire hue Gaurav ko laato se mara lekin jab mera mann nahi bhara toh hafte hue
main bhi neeche baitha aur uska baal pakadkar kheechte hue uska sar zameen par
jor se patak diya….jisase uske cheekhne ki aawaz aur bhi tez ho gayi…..lekin main
nahi ruka aur uska sar zameen par marta hee raha…aur jab uske mathe se khoon
nikalna shuru hua toh maine uske sar ko chhodkar utha
71
“Madarchod…Varun tujhe apna bhai mankar apne ghar le jata tha aur tune uski
bahan ke sath hee…”bolte hue maine ek laat seedhe Gaurav ke muh me mari…jiske
baad uske sar ke sath uske muh se bhi khoon nikalne laga….
Par main thoda hairan tha ki D section me se uska koyi bhi dost mujhe rokne ke
liye samne kyun nahi aa raha tha…Gaurav ka koyi bhi dost use bachane ke liye
mujhe nahi rok raha tha aur na hee kisi ne ladayi jhagda shant karwane ki koshish
bhi ki…yaha tak ke Varun ne bhi mujhe nahi roka aur tab main samjha ki Varun
toh yahi chahta tha…wo janta tha ki main friendynamic ke law ke karan bahut
jyada gussa ho jaunga aur bina kuch soche-samjhe marte dum tak Gaurav ko
marunga…yani ki Varun ne jaan-buchkar bus me wo baat mujhe batayi thi ? toh ye
sab Varun ka plan tha ? that’s why ,I hate everyone…..
Maine Gaurav ka pair pakda aur use ghaseet kar class me sabke samne laya aur
phhir se neeche baitha aur mukko ki jhadi laga di….is dauran kayi baar mera hath
neeche floor par bhi takraya aur mujhe bhi dard hua…kayi jagah se mera bhi hath
kat gaya tha aur mere hath se khoon nikal raha tha….lekin main nahi
rooka…mujhe toh bas Gaurav ki shakl dikh rahi thi aur dheere-dheere mujhe uski
shakl me Gautam ki shakl nazar aane lagi….isliye main use maarta gaya, bas
maarta gaya….aur tab tak maarta raha jab tak ki school ke teachers ne aakar
mujhe us-se alag nahi kiya…mere principal ne toh mujhe maarne ke liye apna hath
bhi utha liya tha….lekin phhir wo rook gaye aur mujhe kuch nahi kiya….BC fattu
,Principal…main uski jagah rahta toh kachar dalta.
Jab teachers ne milkar mujhe Gaurav se alag kiya toh maine apne hatho par dhyan
diya…mera dahina hath buri tarah sooj gaya tha aur zameen me takrane ki wazah
se kayi jagah se kat bhi chukka tha aur khoon nikal raha tha….
Gaurav ko turant school wale hospital le gaye aur mujhe Principal ke cabin me
….jaha sabhi teachers mujhpar chilla rahe the…mujhse reason puchh rahe the ki
maine aisa kyun kiya….lekin maine ek shabd bhi nahi kaha….jiske baad teachers
ne D section ke kuch ladko ko bulaya….
“sir, is ladke se puchhiye….ye D section ka sabse achchha ladka hai… ….ye jhooth
nahi bolega…”Principal ke cabin me aaye hue D section ke ek ladke ki taraf ishara
karke Shriman Bulla ji ne Principal se kaha….lekin Principal kuch kahte uske pahle
hee main bol pada…
“kaun ye….ye aur hoshiyar ?…..main baye hath se bhi paper likhu toh is-se adhik
number mere aayenge….”
“Arman…just…shut up…”
Mujhe shut up karane ke baad Principal ne D section ke sabse hoshiyar ladke se

meri is harqat ka reason puchha aur us hoshiyar ladke ne sab kuchh bak
diya…usne Principal sir ko bata diya ki Varun ki bahan ko lekar ye ladayi hui
thi….Principal ne D section ke ladko ko wapas bheja aur Varun ko cabin me bulaya
aur sath hee D section ke ek ladko ko Vipin bhaiya ki class me bhejkar unko bhi
khabar pahucha di…Varun se Principal ne pura matter jaan liya,jiske baad wo
72
soch me pad gaye ki ab aage kya kiya jaye…..unhone mere ghar phone bhi laga
diya par meri asli problem mere mammi-papa nahi the…meri asli problem mera
bada bhai tha…jo abhi-abhi gusse me Principal ke cabin me ghusa tha …
“isne aisa kiya…? ”Principal se pura matter jan lene ke baad Vipin bhaiya uthe aur
seedhe meri taraf badhe…
Vipin bhaiya ko apni taraf aata dekh mujhe andaza ho gaya tha ki ab mere sath
kya hone wala hai…isiliye main apne gaal sahlane laga taaki dard kam ho….
“kyun be…kya samajh rakh hai tune school ko…”ek thappad markar unhone
mujhse puchha…
“tujhe kitni baar samjhaya ki…Varun ke sath mat ghooma kar…mat baat kiya kar
us-se…”dusara thappad marker unhone kaha “aaj main teri sari garmi utarta
hoon…aaj pure school ke samne tujhe markar jo tera ye ghamand hai na….use aise
todunga ki….”
Pahle toh Vipin bhaiya ne mujhe principal ke cabin me dhoya aur phhir maarte
hue mujhe Principal ke cabin se bahar le aaye…is beech Principal sir ne Vipin
bhaiya ko rokne ki koshish bhi ki lekin Vipin bhaiya nahi ruke aur mujhe marte
hee rahe….ab teachers to class me the nahi…kyunki aadhe toh Gaurav ko lekar
hospital gaye the aur aadhe Principal ke cabin me the… isliye bahut se students
idhar-udhar ghoom rahe the…aur jab Vipin bhaiya mujhe marte hue Principal ke
cabin se bahar le aaye toh sabki maano saans atak gayi…jo jaha tha wahi se sann
rahkar is nazare ko dekh raha tha….teachers ne Vipin bhaiya ko rokna chaha lekin
Vipin bhaiya ne saaf-saaf warning de di ki “uske family matter par koyi
dakhalandazi nahi karega….”
Vipin bhaiya ne mujhe bahut dhoya mujhe beeso jhapad mar diye aur jab wo hath
se marte-marte thak gaye toh unhone ek laat mujhpar kaskar jad di….jisse main
wahi thodi door jakar gira…zameen par main thoda tedha hokar gira tha jiske
karan mere ek side ki khopdi zameen par buri tarah ghista kar chhil gayi
thi….lekin Vipin bhaiya ko pata nahi mujhse kya dushmani thi…wo yahi nahi ruke
aur unhone mera baal pakad kar mujhe uthaya
“aaj se tu sudhar jayega…bahut garmi hai na tujhme….”kahkar unhone apna hath

mujhe marne ke liye uthaye hee the ki maine apni hatheli ko kaskar bandha aur ek
mukka kaskar Vipin bhaiya ke naak par de mara…
“bada hai isliye abhi tak khada hai…lekin ab aur nahi…meri bhi koyi izzat hai aur
tujhse kahi jyada hai..tujhe pata hai tere classmates ke aalawa School ke baki
students tujhe kis name se pukarte hai…? Wo sab tujhe dekhkar kahte hai ki wo
dekh Arman ka chutiya bhai ja raha hai ,jo Arman se har field me peeche hai…jo
hamesha Arman se haar jata hai aur ab agar tune meri taraf ek kadam bhi
badhaya toh…yahi zinda gaad dunga…..MAA KASAM”
.

73
Hum dono bhai the…lekin aaj jo school me ho raha tha, wo bahut bura tha…maine
jab Vipin bhaiya ko dhamkaya toh unki thodi fati aur wo shant ho gaye…iske baad
unhone na hee mujh par hath uthaya aur na hee mujhse kuch kaha kyunki wo ab
iske kaabil bhi nahi the…actually hua ye tha ki maine jo mukka unke naak par
mara tha, us-se unke naak se khoon nikalne laga tha…aur thodi hee der me wo bhi
khoon se lathpath ho gaye…par isme galti kisiki thi ? meri ? Vipin bhaiya ki ? ya
School ke teachers ki ? jo is samay mook darshak ban kar khade the….mana ki
mere papa is school ke trustee hai lekin unhe Vipin bhaiya ko phhir bhi rokna
chahiye tha…Vipin bhaiya ne apne jeb se roomal nikala aur apne naak se lagatar
bah rahe khoon ko rokne ki koshish karne lage...main wahi khada tha…wahi kuch
foot ki doori par…maine Vipin bhaiya ko dekha wo ab bhi roomal se apna khoon
saaf kar rahe the tabhi meri nazar principal ke cabin ke bahar rakhi lohe ki bench
par padi aur main bina samay gawaye waha gaya aur bench ko uthakar seedhe
Vipin bhaiya ke paas pahucha….main us bench se kya karne wala hoon ye
samajhne me teachers ko thoda time laga aur jab tak wo ye samajhte maine bench
ko kayi baar Vipin bhaiya ke sar par de mara tha….confirm…maine 4 baar Vipin
bhaiya ko us bench se mara tha aur ek baar school ke us teacher ko jisne mujhe
sabse pahle rokne ki koshish ki thi…
Waise Jab aapke papa school ke trustee rahte hai toh iska sirf fayda hee fayda hota
hai…ab mujhe hee dekh lo …maine itna bada kaand kiya…Gaurav ko hospital
pahucha diya…lekin mujhpar koyi action nahi liya gaya…kam se kam do-teen
hafto ke liye toh school se bahar karna banta hee tha…par wo bhi nahi….upar se
School prashasan ne Gaurav ko iska dosi thahraya aur use restricate to kiya hee
sath hee quarterly exam dene se bhi use rok diya….yani ki mere papa ne apni
influence ka full use kiya aur isme unka sath diya Varun ke papa ne…jo ki School
ke char trustees me se ek the…kyunki afterall unhi ki laundiya ke chakkar me toh
ye bawal hua tha…
.
“hero banne ka bahut shauk hai tujhe…” hospital me meri aur Vipin bhaiya ki
marham patti karane ke baad jab papa bahar gaye to Vipin bhaiya ne mujhse
kaha…
“wo toh main already hoon…”
“tu ruk..Arman…ab toh bas mujhe ek mauke ki taalash hai…phhir dekh main kaise
teri dhajjiya udata hoon….”
“ek baat batao…koyi kaam dham nahi hai kya ,jo din bhar mere peeche pade rahte
ho…kya maine kabhi aapke matter me ungali ki.aapko kya lagta hai mujhe aapke
kands ki jaankari nahi hai…Vipin bhaiya, main sab kuch jaanta hoon…par main
kabhi kuch bolta nahi…yadi main papa ke samne apka parcha kholne baith gaya
na….toh unke idol bete hone ka jo dhong aap rach rahe ho na wo sab rafa- dafa ho
jayega…pata nahi aakhir ghar me sab aapko acha kyun mante hai…jabki aap
jitney percentage late ho us-se toh main hamesha 10-12 % aage hee rahta
hoon…aap koyi sa bhi field chun lo aur mujhse jeet ke dikha
do…study…sports…quiz…GK…kuch bhi chun lo”

74
“Arman…bahut ghamand hai na tere andar…par yaad rakhna ye ghamand tootega

zaroor…zindagi mauka sabko deti hai…abhi tera time hai, kal mera hoga….tab
main gin-gin ke hisab lunga…ghamand toh ravan ka nahi bacha toh phhir tera kya
haal hoga….”
“toh ye bhi toh dekho ki Ravan ka ghamand toda kisne tha…Shri Ram ne…na ki
aap jaise kisi sadak chhap ne…aur mera ghamand jab tootega ,tab tootega...uski
parvah mat karo…aap toh ye socho ki ghamand tootne se pahle main kya-kya kar
jaunga aur mujhe toh bas quarterly exam ka intezaar hai…jaha main har subject
me 95+ score karunga aur aap 70…75 me chud jaoge…aak thoo…jakar padhayi
karo aur maa-baap ka naam roshan karo…shukra manao ki mere karan hee
Pandey ji ki beti se aap sab compete kar pate ho…warna aap sabko wo Pandey ji ki
beti rel deti”
Vipin bhaiya apna daant peeskar rah gaye aur main in sabme itna kho gaya tha ki
mujhe yaad hee nahi raha ki main is samay ka nahi hoon aur ye sab toh pahle se
decided hai…mujhe achanak khayal aaya ki main toh ab bhi MBD aur River View
Colony ke beech me kahi behosh pada hua hoon…maine time dekha…ab tak mujhe
yaha aaye hue lagbhag paanch ghante beet chuke the, par kya haqiqat me bhi
paanch ghante beet gaye honge ?…ya us-se kam ? ya phhir jyada ?
“agli baar se past aur present ke time ko compare karna padega….”bistar par lete
hue maine socha“pata nahi main kis haal me hounga…waha se guzarne wale log
toh mujhe bewada samajh rahe honge…pata nahi yaha se kab niklunga…kahi main
mar toh nahi gaya BC ? ”
Yaha ke bare me ek chiz jo maine aur gaur ki thi wo ye ki mujhe na toh yaha neend
aati hai aur na hee mujhe bhookh lagti hai, isiliye jab ghar me mujhe khane ke liye
bulaya gaya toh maine saaf-saaf mana kar diya aur gharwalo ko laga ki main
gussa hoon…jab ghadi me raat ke dus baje toh meri chinta aur badhne lagi….aur
apne room me deewar ko dekhkar maine socha ki “chalo ek aur baar try marte
hai…”
Maine apne sar ko sahlakar deewar par de mara…lekin nateeza ab bhi wahi tha
aur main bhi wahi tha…
“ye kya hai BC …kya chutiyapa hai...mujhe wapas jaana hai…”deewar par chillate
hue maine kaha aur wapas bistar par let gaya…ab neend toh mujhe aati nahi upar
se main abhi us samay me atka hua tha…jis samay me mere paas na toh laptop tha
aur na hee mobile…isliye beetne wala har ek seconds mere liye ghanto ke barabar
tha…aur wo puri raat meri zindagi ki ab tak ki sabse badi raat rahi…jise maine
bistar par letkar apne vartman ke bare me sochte hue bitaya…mera dimagh ab
puri tarah ghoom raha tha…isliye subah 6 bajte hee main chupke se ghar se nikal
kar ek pan thele par cigarette peene gaya….
“4-5 cigarette dena…”jeb se sau ki ek patti nikal kar maine kaha
“sar me kya hua…”Cigarette dene ki bajay us Pan thele wale ne mujhse mere sar ke
bare me pucha

75
“tujhse kya matlab be…tu apna kaam kar…”bhadakte hue maine kaha…
“itna chilla kyun raha hai…izzat se baat kar…”
“dekh main na teri *** chod dunga…yadi tune cigarette dene ke aalawa ek aur
shabd bhi kuch kaha toh…”
“ja BC , nahi dunga cigarette…”
“cigarette toh tera baap bhi dega…”bolte hue maine sau ki patti wapas apne jeb me
dali aur apna hath andar daalkar cigarette ka ek packet nikal liya “tu mujhse puch
raha tha na ki mere sar me ye chot kaise lagi…aise hee lagi thi…tere jaisa ek lawda
tha…usi ko marte waqt mujhe chot lagi…ab mere peeche mat aana…warna ye chot
tere sar me transfer kar dunga”
Sadak ke kinare bane ek ghar ke peeche jakar maine fatafat ek cigarette sulgaya
aur lambe-lambe kash marne laga …jisase mujhe thodi rahat nahi mili ….jiske
baad maine do aur cigarette fook mare….aur tab mujhe apni galti ka ahsaas hua
aur main wapas us panthele wale ke pas gaya…
“sorry…”cigarette ke dibba uski taraf fekte hue main bola “ 6 bachi hai…rakh
le…aur agli baar se grahak jo maange chup chap de diya karna…”
.
Cigarette peene se meri bechaini thodi kam hui thi lekin phhir bhi main tension me
tha ki main kab yaha se nikal paunga par main itna toh jaan gaya tha ki yadi main
yahi ghar par pada raha toh yaha se nikalna mushqil hai…mujhe kuch na kuch
karte rahna hoga taaki kisi ek event ke dauran mere dimag ke andar chalne wala
samay chakra mujhe bahar nikal feke….isiliye main school jaane ke liye taiyar
hone laga…gharwalo ne bahut mana kiya ki aaj mat ja, thode din rest kar le…lekin
main nahi mana aur important test ka bahana karke school ke liye taiyar hone
laga…lekin gharwale phhir bhi nahi maan rahe the aur Pita shri ne toh yaha tak
kah diya tha ki wo mere teacher se baat kar lenge…lekin main nahi mana aur
jabaran school jaane ke liye taiyaar hone laga….jiske karan papa thoda naraz ho
gaye….lekin maine apna bag taanga aur ghar se nikal gaya….
Aaj Varun nahi aaya tha…isliye main bus me sar jhukaye chup chap baiha
tha..normally bus se school ka safar aadhe ghante ka tha…lekin jab bahut der tak
bus school nahi pahuchi toh maine ghadi me time dekha…
“ek ghanta ho gaya…aur bus abhi tak chal rahi hai…”apna sar uthakar maine
khidki ke bahar dekha toh meri aankh fati ki fati rah gayi….bahar thik usi tarah
bahut sari sadke ban rahi thi…jaise ki kal. Jis-se main samajh gaya ki yahi samay
hai, yaha se nikalne ka…maine khud ko dekha toh paya ki main school uniform me
nahi hoon aur mera sharir bhi present time wale Arman ka tha…maine bus me
apni nazar daudayi , bus me koyi nahi tha….na toh students …na hee conductor
aur na hee driver….par bus apni full speed ke sath sadak par daudi jaa rahi thi….
“kya-kya karwa raha hai mera dimag mujhse….ab is chalti hui bus se koodna
padega…khair koyi baat nahi….kaun sa mujhe kuch hoga…”badbadate hue main
gate tak aaya aur bhagwan ka naam lekar neeche kood gaya….mujhe past me
76
aakhiri pal jo yaad hai usme bus ka tyre mere upar chadh gaya tha aur mujhe
bahut sari aawaze sunayi de rahi thi lekin phhir sab kuch achanak se shant ho
gaya…
Idhar haqiqat me main jab utha toh meri lakh koshisho ke bawzood meri aankh
nahi khul rahi thi…jaise ki kisi ne feviquick se chipka diya ho…maine apni
ungaliyo se bhi aankh kholne ki koshish ki lekin aankh aisi chipak rahi thi main
kuch nahi kar pa raha tha…jis-se mujhe shaq hua ki kahi main sach me haqiqat me
aaya hoon ya phhir se kahi aur pahuch gaya hoon….kahi lawda ,main mar toh
nahi gaya ?
“control…control…aur ahiste se khol…jaha power kaam nahi karta waha pyar

kaam karta hai…kaam kar raha hai…aise hee …haan…iski toh…”
Aankh khulte hee main chauka , kyunki is waqt main apne room me tha…lekin ye
kaise mumkin hai…kyunki mujhe ache se yaad hai ki main MBD restaurant se apne
room pahucha hee nahi tha…maine time dekha toh dopahar ke ek baje the…aur
yadi ye wahi din hai jis din main last time Nisha se mila tha toh yaha ka do ghanta
mere past ke chaubis ghante ke barabar hai…..
“Relativity…Einstein kaka ”
Par yadi ye dusare din ka 1 PM hua toh ?…yadi yaha koyi relativity na hui toh ? ye
bhi toh ho sakta hai ki mujhe kisi sadak ke kinare pada hua dekh Varun mujhe
utha laya ho…aur is waqt kahi bahar gaya hua ho…waise bhi room ka gate khula
hai…par isme ek locha hai…yadi main sadak ke kinare behosh pada rahta aur
Varun mujhe dhoondh leta toh wo mujhe yaha room me thodi lata ,wo toh mujhe
seedhe hospital me admit karta…par ye maloom karna ki aaj kaun si taarikh hai
bahut aasan tha…maine apna mobile uthaya aur date check kiya….
“5 Sept. last time jab main Nisha se mila tha toh 5 Sept. tha ya phhir 4 sept. ya
phhir 3…ek min. kal 4th Sept. tha…sure…lekin mujhe aisa kyun lag raha hai ki kal
4th nahi balki 3rd Sept. tha…bahut confusing hai ye…ek kaam karta hoon Nisha ko
call karta hoon….”
.
“haan ,Arman…toh confirm hain na ki tum hum sabko party de rahe ho….”
“party ,kaisi party…”angadayi lete hue maine pucha
“arey itni jaldi bhool gaye…tumhi ne toh kaha tha ki tum…mujhe, Shipra ko
,Sonam ko aur David ko apology party doge…”
“arey haan…yaad aaya…par pahle main tumhe specially party dunga ,akele
me….uske baad sabko ek sath….”
“tum Mazak kar rahe ho na…”
“na..matlab haan…matlab na…pata nahi kya bol raha hoon main”
“main kuch samjhi nahi…”

77
“samjha toh main bhi nahi…par main Mazak nahi kar raha…aaj sham ko main aur
tum matlab ki tum aur main kahi bahar chalte hai…mall ya hotel…kuch bhi choose
kar lo…”
“sachi na…phhir apni baat se palat mat jaana…ok bye”
“arey rook toh…”
“jaldi bolo…main fb me apni photo dalne ke liye photo edit kar rahi hoon..”
“main tujhse aaj hee MBD me mila tha na…confirm…”
“ye bhi koyi puchhne wali baat hai…do ghante pahle hee toh mile the aur bill bhi
tumne pay kiya tha…remember”
“kya remember…mujhe sab kuch yaad hai…wo toh main bas tujhe yaad dila raha
tha ki aaj bill maine pay kiya hai”
“I love you..ab bye…”
“love you too….”bolte-bolte main ruka aur phhir kisi soch me pad gaya….jiske
baad main man hee man me raksho ki tarah hasne laga…. “ab batata hoon in sabko
ki Arman se panga lene ka kya nateeza hota hai…mujhe toh abhi se hee kafi
excitement hai aur jab mera ye haal hai toh in sabki toh gand hee fat jayegi…inhe
Version 2.0 ki jhalak dikhani padegi,taki next time se aukat me rahe…waise bhi
kafi din ho gaye kuch dhamal kiye hue….mere fans ko lagta hai ki main badal gaya
hoon ”
.
Nisha se baat karne ke baad main bistar se utha aur neeche baithkar cigarette
jalaya…
“toh school life ka ek din real life ke do ghante ke barabar hota hai…main khamkha
tension le raha tha…is tarah toh main kayi din waha bita sakta hoon…Relativity is
great…Shri Einstein is great…ye ab kaun call kar raha hai….kash ki ek din Esha ka
call aa jaye aur wo bole ki…sorry Arman, wo sab toh Mazak tha…asaliyat me main
Gautam se nahi balki tumse hee pyar karti hoon….kya tum mujhe abhi college ki
canteen me mil sakte ho ? …..par main janta tha ki aisa kabhi nahi hoga…ye sab
toh sirf meri dili ichhaye hai jo aksar mere dil me utar jati
hai….Esha….Eshaaaaaaaaa……jitni baar iska naam liya hai yadi utni baar
bhagwan ka naam liya hota toh bhagwan mujhe swarg lok ka raja bana
dete….khair koyi baat nahi…”
Waha se uthkar main balcony me aaya aur wahi khada hokar aane jaane wale
logo ko dekhne laga….aur bahut der tak main waha se aane jane wale logo ko
dekhta raha…pata nahi, kyun..par main waha balcony me khada hokar waha se
guzarne wale har ek shaks ko dhyan se dekh raha tha…jaise ki unhone kya pahan
rakha hai…wo kaise chal rahe hai…wo akele hai ya kisi ki sath me….yahi sab karte
hue maine bahut der wahi balcony par beeta diya tha aur jab mere pair jawab
78
dene lage toh main andar aane ke liye muda lekin peeche mudte hee mujhe meri
aankho ke samne Aradhna ka chehra dikhayi diya…aur main ekdum se jhatka
khate hue apne aap peeche chala gaya…jisase mera pair balcony me fasa aur main
ulta hokar balcony ke neeche gir gaya….
“Maaadhar……kya hai lawwdaaa yeeeee…”karahte hue main sirf itna hee bol paya
aur phhir wahi seedha let gaya….
Chapter-11 : lip of heart
Balcony se neeche girne ke kuch samay tak main wahi zameen par leta raha aur
jab sharir me thodi jaan aayi yani ki jab balcony se girne ka dard kuch kam hua
toh maine lete hue hee apna hath-pair hilaya….
“thoda dard hai lekin hath-pair kaam kar raha hai…”
Waha se uthkar sabse pahle maine apna shoulder ghumaya aur angadayi lene ki
koshish ki…lekin tabhi meri kamar me itna tez dard hua ki angadayi mujhe beech
me hee cancel karni padi…
“kamar lachak gaya kya …aur maro beta stunt…”
“lawda stunt…wo toh Aradhna ka chehra dikhayi diya toh…”
“fattu…”
“ab mare hue logo se kaun nahi darta…upar se jab tumne khud use mara
ho…”langada-langada kar ek hath kamar me rakhkar andar jate hue main bola
aur andar aate hee bistar par gir gaya….
“Nisha ko kya bolunga ab…”maine khud se sawal kiya
“bolna kya hai…sach bol dena..ki jisko tune college life me chod ke fek diya tha…wo
tujhe dikhayi deti hai…use tu sach kyun nahi bata deta ki…tere sath aajkal kya ho
raha hai….kaise teri gand mar rahi hai…”
“tujhe kya lagta hai…main use sab sach bataunga aur wo maan jayegi…”bistar par
palti marte hue main bola “abey wo sochegi ki main use bewkoof bana raha
hoon…”
“abey try toh maar…shuru se explain kar usko…tujhe nahi lagta ki Nisha ko ab sab
sach batane ka waqt aa gaya hai…”
“chal be..jab jhooth bol sakta hoon toh sach kyun bolu…chal acha ,maan le…ki
main use sach bata bhi deta hoon toh beta wo sach janne ke baad sirf ek hee chiz
karegi….”
“kya…”
“breakup…”

79
“wo toh waise bhi hoga”
“jab hoga tab dekha jayega…aur tujhe kya lagta hai ki main use jakar bolunga
ki…Nisha ,main dimag ke through time travel kar sakta hoon ya past me ja sakta
hoon toh wo ye baat maan legi…abey chutiye, wo itna hasegi na ki haste-haste use
heart attack aa jayega….chal ab nikal thodi der aaram marne de apun ko…aur ja
jakar painkiller lekar aa dukan se….”
Balcony se neeche girne ke baad mann toh mera bilkul nahi tha kahi jaane
ka…lekin kyunki Shri Arman ne vaada kiya tha isliye kuch ghante ke rest ke baad
main jabran bistar se utha…facewash se face dhoya… cream, powder lagaya aur
phhir kabad me se suit nikal kar pahan-ne laga…puri tarah taiyar hone ke baad
main room se nikal hee raha tha ki mujhe yaad aaya ki…deo bhi maar leta hoon
aur do-char painkiller bhi mashak leta hoon…aur maine aisa hee kiya…
“kaha hai, janeman….”call karke maine Nisha se puchha…
“bas 5 minute…wo pahle maine green colour ki nail polish laga li thi…lekin phhir
mujhe yaad aaya ki meri dress toh blue colour ki hai ,isliye ab blue colour ki nail
polish laga rahi hoon…sweet na…”
“maha sweet…”
itna sunkar Nisha khilkhila kar hasne lagi…aur maine turant call cut kar di kyunki
wo abhi mujhe apne nail polish ke bare me bata rahi thi aur mujhe ye andaza ho
chala tha ki yadi maine call cut nahi ki toh thodi der me wo apne lipstick…necklace
aur kya kahte hai use jo aankho me lagate hai ?…eye color ….eye liner ? ya phhir
eye shadow ? …whatever ….un sab ke bare me bhi batayegi…isliye maine phone
rakhna hee munasib samjha….
“kya taiyar ho rahi hai yar…aadha ghanta ho gaya….aisich time pe jab main khali
baitha rahta hoon tabhi mera dimag ghumta hai…khair, kar bhi kya sakte hai…”
Ye sochkar maine aadhe ghante ke baad bhi phone nahi kiya lekin jab ye aakda ek
ghante ka hua toh mere sabra jawab de gaya aur maine phone laga hee diya…
“aaj hee chalna hai na ? ya kal chale….”
“bas 5 minute…main room se nikal hee rahi hoon…”
“chal phhir main car nikalta hoon…”apni kamar par hath rakhkar main khada hua
aur car ki chabi ke sath goggle jeb me rakh kar neeche aaya….
.
Main jab-jab Varun ki car ya bike use karta hoon toh har baar man hee man me
use thanks kahta hoon…kyunki uski vazah se mujhe kahi aane jaane me ,kisi ke bhi
sath aane-jaane me koyi dikkat nahi hoti….jo chahiye bas use bol do….uske
according wo car ya bike chhod deta hai….Nisha ko aata dekh maine rear view
mirror khud par focus kiya aur usme apna virtual…erect image dekhte hue baal set
karne laga….

80
“kuch missing-missing hai par kya…watch….done, tie…done….phhir kya missing

hai…yaad aaya, goggle…”badbadate hue maine goggle lagaya aur Nisha ke liye
car ka gate khola….lekin phhir maine achanak car ka gate band kar liya aur laat
maarkar car ka gate khola…jisase Nisha thodi chauk gayi…
“kaisi lag rahi hoon main…”car me baith-te hee Nisha puchhi
“maal”uske puchhte hee maine chir-parichit andaz me jawab diya “nice boobs…ek
baar touch karke dekhu kya”
“aise bhi koyi tareef karta hai…”thoda mayoos hokar wo boli “dhyan se dekho
maine kaun si dress pahni hai…”
“chal na…kyun paka rahi hai…”
“arey dress ka colour dekho…”
“navy blue…”
“kuch yaad aaya…”
“nahi…”
“arey ,yaad karne ki koshish toh karo…”
“blue…blue….hmm…blue film…tu sex karna chahti hai…car sex ”
“nahiiiiiii….yaad karo ki tumne mujhe ek baar apne mysterious dream ke bare me

bataya tha…jisme tum aur main bahut khush the aur usme maine blue dress pahni
thi…yaad aaya”
“kuch-kuch yaad aa raha hai…sapne se yaad aaya, kaha hai re mera

revolver….abhi sapna sach karta hoon…”car start karte hue main bola aur car
sadak par dauda di…
Nisha ki ek bahut kharab aadat hai ki uske sath raho toh all time us-se baat karte
raho…aap kya kar rahe ho,isse use koyi fark nahi padta…chahe aapko heart attack
hee kyun na aaya ho..wo baat karte hee rahegi…yahi mahol is waqt car me bhi
thi…wo har do seconds me koyi naya topic utha leti aur chahti ki main car chalate
waqt us-se baat karu…kabhi wo Shipra ke bare me baat karti ,toh kabhi Sonam ke
bare me ,usne mujhse David ke bare me bhi baat ki aur phhir David ke sath apne
bachpan ki puri kahani sunane baith gayi….jise sunkar maine socha ki…kya
,lawda humi ek chutiya the…jo ego ke chakkar me laundiyo se baat nahi karte
the…khair wo samay Arman Version 1.0 ka tha aur Version 1.0 wala Arman tharki
nahi tha…warna main kayiyo ki abhi tak le chuka hota….
“acha Arman , ye batao…meri heels kaisi hai…tumne gaur kiya kya…”
“mast hai…”bina Nisha ki taraf dekhkar maine jawab diya…
“bina dekhe bol rahe ho…”thoda mayoos hote hue Nisha boli
81
“bina dekhe…arey jab tu ,car me baith rahi thi na…tabhi maine tujhe pura scan kar
liya tha…tere upar ke baal se lekar tere neeche ke baal tak ,sab kuch mujhe pata
hai ki kaisa hai aur kitne centimeter ka hai”
“clean shaved"sharmate hue dusare taraf dekhkar Nisha ne kaha
Sharma kar Nisha boli lekin meri nazar samne sadak par hee rahi…kyunki ek bar
college ke dino me main aise hee rolebazi me road par bike se parabolic curve
banate hue pela gaya tha…jiski mujhe bahut bhari kimat chukani padi thi…main
us din sadak par parabolic curve toh nahi bana paya upar se golden jubilee me
anchoring karne ka hath laga mauka bhi maine gawa diya tha…are bhad me gayi
anchoring…meri jaan bach gayi wahi bahut hai…aur tab main samjha ki free me
sirf blood aur sperm donate karna chahiye..jaan nahi. Us din ke accident se maine
jo chiz seekhi wo ye ki rolebazi kahi bhi chod lo lekin driving ke waqt bilkul
nahi…isliye main Nisha ki baat sun toh raha lekin meri nazar samne sadak par fix
thi….par ye baat alag hai ki ‘clean shaved’ sunkar mere pant me hulchal honi shuru
ho gayi thi….
“acha Arman, ye batao…mera necklace kaisa hai aur ear ring….match to kar raha
hai na…”ek khatarnak turning me Nisha ne mujhse ye sawal pucha, jise maine ek
kaan se suna aur dusare kaan se nikal diya….matlab ki ,no response…
“bolo na…” aur abki baar bhi maine wahi kiya yani ki no response….
Mere is tarah back to back , do no response se Nisha thodi naraz ho gayi aur apna
gaal phulakar apna chehra dusari taraf kar liya….maine Turning cross hone tak
Nisha se kuch nahi kaha aur jaise hee turning cross hui…maine car sadak ke kinare
roki…
“kya chahti hai , car thok du,tere is hazar rupaye ke necklace ke chakkar me
?…nahi tu chahti kya hai…jab se car me baithi hai…bas bole ja rahi hai-bole ja rahi
hai…matlab ek percent bhi dimag hai ki nahi…upar se main thahra nausikhiya
driver…abhi mar jayegi toh pata chalega, phhir narak me puchhte rahna ,rakshso
se ki…meri sandel kaisi hai…meri lipstick kaisi hai…meri dress kaisi hai…”
“necklace hazar rupaye ka nahi…dedh lakh ka hai..”thodi der ke liye Nisha ne apna
chehra meri taraf kiya…jawab diya aur wapas dusari taraf apna muh fer liya….
“itna mahanga…tab toh mauka dekhkar chori karna padega. Ya ek kaam karta
hoon, tujhe yahi jaan se marker…tera necklace lekar rafoo-chakkar ho jata
hoon…kisi ko thodi pata chalega ki tu mere sath thi…kya bolti hai, revolver
nikalu…”
“David ko bataya hai ,maine…”abki baar bhi Nisha ne thodi der ke liye apna
chehra meri taraf rotate karke jawab di aur phhir jawab dekar wapas opposite
direction me rotate kar li…
“ek baar clockwise rotation, phhir rest, uske baad anticlockwise rotation…yani ki
plus, zero , minus….magnitude same hai…toh net effect nikalta hai zero…
82
displacement… zero…wow , Incredible ! Physics…aaj Shri Newton hote toh bahut

khush hote…”bolte hue maine car dobara start ki….
.
Nisha ko maine jab se turning cross karke batti di thi, wo shant thi…jisase mujhe
khayal aaya ki yadi main isko car me ghusne se pahle hee batti de deta toh kitna
acha rahta…lekin ab jab wo chup thi toh mujhe thoda bura lag raha tha…seriously
…mera matlab Nisha bolte hue hee achi lagti hai…main bhi lawda ajeeb case
hoon…ek pal ko yadi mujhe ek chiz achi lagti hai toh dusare pal wahi chiz buri
lagne lagti hai…kabhi-kabhi toh main samajh nahi pata ki aakhir main chahta kya
hoon…kyunki har badalte waqt ke sath meri ichchhaye bahut tezi se badalti
hai…itni tezi se ki ek hee minute me mujhe bahut pasand aane wali chiz dusare pal
napasand ho jati hai….lekin is duniya me ek chiz aisi hai jise main kabhi napasand
nahi kar sakta…actually ek nahi…do aisi chiz hai…jo constantly mujhe achi lagti
hai..par mujhe aisa kyun lag raha hai ki aisi do nahi balki teen chize
hai…Esha…daru…and Physics….confirm…mujhe constantly pasand aane wali aisi
teen hee chize hai aur daru se yaad aaya…I love daru more than girls….
“wow, tumhara necklace toh kafi mehanga lag raha hai…kitne ka hai…”jab Nisha
aur thodi der tak kuch nahi boli toh maine hee baat ki shuruat karna thik
samjha….waise aise aage se baat karna meri fitrat me nahi hai,par kabhi-kabhi
main aisa kar leta hoon…kuch khas logo ke liye.lekin Nisha ne koyi jawab nahi
diya
“kya lipstick lagati hai tu, Nisha….main toh fan ho gaya tere hontho ka…matlab
kamal kar diya tune toh”
“ab tum kyun mujhse baat kar rahe ho…haan !…ab car ka accident nahi hoga.yadi
kuch bolo toh uspar kayam bhi raha karo….mujhe nahi karni tumse koyi baat-
vaat…”mujhpar chillate hue Nisha boli
“mat kar…main toh bas insaniyat ka farz nibha raha tha…socha ki tujhe bur lag
gaya matlab bura laga hoga toh….main aisi hee baat karne laga tha ”
“mujhse, double meaning me kyun baat karte ho aur is tarah ke ashleel…behude

words ka istemaal mat kiya karo…”
“ab main tujhse aise baat nahi karunga toh kya Sonam se aise baat karunga…
kamal karti hai, Physics ke niyam ka palan nahi karti hai…”gussa hone ka natak
karte hue main bola…kyunki mujhe maloom tha ki mujhe gusse me dekhkar Nisha
shant ho jati hai aur ye war is baar bhi kaam kar gaya....jiske baad meri taraf
dekh kar Nisha boli…
“toh tumhe kaisi lagi meri sandel…dhyan se dekho…isme blue colour ka strip bhi
hai neeche…”
“mast hai..ekdum mast…superb…matlab ki itna acha hai ki mera jee kar raha hai
ki ise kha jaun….”
“hihihi…thank you…aur mera hairband…”
“bas kar re bawa…maar hee dalegi kya aaj…”

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“itna acha hai…? Detail me batao na”chahakte hue Nisha itni khush hui ki bata
nahi sakta ki kitni khush hui….
waise bhi ye sab puch-puch kar usne meri halat aisi kar di thi ki ab main kuch bhi
describe karne ki halat me nahi tha….lekin phhir bhi apni puri taqat laga kar main
bola…
“you’re great…your choice is just amazing…your dress is mindblowing and your

vagina ke toh kya kahhh……ne…..sorry wo aise hee apne aap flow-flow me muh se
nikal gaya”slowly-slowly break marte hue maine kaha….
Nisha ne Eternity Mall choose kiya tha…jo ki River View Colony se 25 km door
tha…upar se main thahra nausikhiya driver…isliye hume Eternity pahuchne me
lagbhag ek ghanta lag gaya….Nisha bahut khush thi, isliye main bhi bahut khush
tha….waise meri ye fitrat toh nahi hai ki mujhpar samne wale ki khushi ya gham
ka koyi asar pade…lekin jaisa ki maine pahle kaha tha ki kabhi-kabhi aisa ho jata
hai…
“tumne ye mall kyun choose kiya…”lift se bahar nikal kar maine Nisha se pucha….
Jiske jawab me apna baal hath se peeche karte hue wo mujhe dekhni lagi aur kuch
der tak meri aankho me dekhti hee rahi…
“ye kaha kho gayi…kahi ye bhi time travel toh nahi karne lagi…”sochte hue maine
Nisha ko thoda hilaya , lekin wo meri aankho me hee dekhti rahi…
“kya tumhe itna bhi yaad nahi ki hum pahli baar yaha mile the…isi mall me…”
“yaad…sab yaad hai mujhe…tu kisi ka batua marke ground floor me bhag rahi thi
aur main third floor par tha…jiske baad maine tujhpar tajectory set karke khud ko
launch kar diya tha…mujhe aaj bhi yaad hai wo din…ki kaise tu mere samne ro
rahi thi…”(kamal hai hum dono yaha mile the…mujhe toh laga tha ki park me mile
honge)
“aisa kuch bhi nahi hua tha,samjhe….”kaskar ek mukka seedhe mere chhati me
marte hue Nisha ne kaha…
“pyar me itna tez thodi marte hai….”apna chhati sahlate hue main bola
“dekha mera power…”
“power…? yani work upon time…anyway …leave it ….”samne se aati ek maal ko

dekhte hue main bola “mere samne jyada power-vower mat kar ,warna Abhi fook
dunga na toh neeche feka jayegi…”
.
Nisha khud ek maal thi aur uske rahte maine mere samne se aati hui ek ladki ko
dekha aur bas dekhta hee rah gaya…us ladki ko samne se dekhkar meri dilI
ichchha hui ki main uski gand bhi dekhu …uski gand ka shape aur size dekhne ke
84
liye…jab wo mere paas se gujari toh main peeche muda aur dekhte hee main us
ladki ko chodne ke bare me sochne laga aur man hee man me khud se
bola…“wah…kya gand hai…ye jhatu toh ise bahut chodta hoga…chhote log,
sale….gand ke pujari ”
“Arman…ab saamne dekh lo …wo chalI gayi”jab main bahut der tak peeche hee
dekhta raha toh kohni marker Nisha ne mera dhyan us ladki ki gand se hataya….
“dekha…yahi hota hai…jab hum dono sex nahi karte toh…mera dhyan
unnecessarily …. unnecessary ladkiyo par chala jata hai…”Dominos me ghuste hue
maine kaha…
Dominos ke andar jakar hum dono ek jagah par baith gaye , maine do pizza order
kiya ,jiske baad Nisha boli….
“tumhe meri aankhe kaisi lag rahi hai…”
“kya hua, teri aankho ko….”uski aankho me dekhte hue main bola“teri aankh toh
thodi blue dikh rahi hai…”
“guess karo, ye kaise hua hoga”
“hmm…scattering of light…jiski vazah se aasman neela dikhta hai ”
“nahiiii…jab dekho, tab physics…common sense use karo na”
“lense…lagayi hogi”
“haan…”muskurate hue Nisha ne jawab diya “acha lag raha hai na”
“haan….”
“acha batao…hum dono pahli baar kaha mile the….”apni muskan jaari rakhte hue
usne mujhse pucha…
“kyun batau ? ja nahi batata”
“are batao na…”
“pahle 100 de phhir bataunga”
“chalo de diya ,maan lo”
“toh maine bata diya, tu bhi maan le”
“ab samjhi…tumhe yaad hee nahi hai ki, hum pahli baar kaha mile the…hai
na..”thoda serious hote hue Nisha boli
“yaad…mujhe sab yaad rahta hai…rook thodi der”bolkar maine flashback me

gaya…

85
lekin ajeeb baat hai ki Nisha se first time milne ki jo tasveer mujhe mil rahi thi….wo
Eternity mall ki nahi balki River View colony ke park ki thi….toh kya matlab hai
iska ki Nisha mujhse jhooth bol rahi hai ya phhir mera dimag…? pahle toh aisa
kabhi nahi hua…flashback mar-mar ke toh maine 8th semester ki puri story Varun
ko perfectly sunayi thi…phhir kaha galti ho rahi hai..kya flashback me jaane ki
meri power khatm ho gayi hai ? ya phhir Nisha jhooth bol rahi hai….? lekin Nisha
jhooth kyun bolegi….ya ye bhi ho sakta hai ki hum dono first time park me hee mile
ho aur Nisha jhooth bolkar mera test le rahi ho…..ye toh sala reasoning ka
question ho gaya…chalo maan lo ki hum dono yaha Eternity mall me first time
mile honge, par main mall kyun aaya hounga…kapde kharidne….No Never…8th
Semester ke baad toh ye sab karne ka mera mann ho hee nahi sakta toh phhir kya
pizza khane…kahi yaha Dominos me toh humari pahli mulaqat nahi hui thi ? lekin
yadi mujhe pizza khana hota toh main yaha 25 kilometer door nahi aata…jabki
mera kaam ek call se bhi ho sakta tha….toh kya phhir grocery ke liye main mall
aaya tha….
“bitch please…you are Shri Arman…grocery no… never”
“phhir kisliye aaya raha hounga…jis-se meri mulaqat is-se hui hogi….”Nisha ko
dekh kar main sochane laga….aur wo mano bas mera sar kalam ke liye ekdum
taiyar thi…use bas intezar tha ki kab main galat jawab du aur wo mera sar uda de
“yaad aaya…PVR me…main movie dekhne aaya tha..hai na ? ”
“right..”thoda nirash hote hue Nisha ne kaha aur uske nirash hone ki vazah shayad
ye thi ki use maine wo mauka nahi diya jiski taalash me wo thi….usne mujhe khari-
khoti sunane ka pura intezam kar liya tha ,shayad ek-do dialogue bhi usne soch
rakha tha lekin mere sahi jawab ne uske khade armano par dhokha kar diya
tha…That’s Shri Arman for you….Bitches
Isi dauran humara order bhi aa gaya par jab se maine apna dimag revine mara
tha tab se mera sar me dard shuru ho gaya tha…aur pizza ka ek slice maine jaise
hee uthaya , mere fefdo me aisi tez jalan hui jaise kisi ne garam angare chhua diye
ho….
“kya hua, Arman….rook kyun gaye, khao na”
“pata nahi…kya hua…par mujhe ab bilkul acha nahi lag raha”ek hath se apna sar
aur ek hath se apni chhati sahlate hue main bola “mera sar ghoom raha hai…aise
lag raha hai jaise ki abhi bas fatne hee wala hai…lagta hai brain hamorrhage ho
jayega”
“lo pani piyo”apni jagah se uthkar meri taraf ,mere bagal me aakar Nisha boli…
“pani se kuch nahi hoga…”apna sar peeche chair me tikane ke liye maine apna sar
peeche kiya….lekin chair me main apna sar tika saku wo chair itni badi nahi thi….
“kaisi jhat type chair rakhi hui hai, in logo ne…chal chalte hai,yaha se…”

86
“chalo…”bolkar Nisha uthi aur mobile nikalkar kisi ko call karne lagi…
“kise call kar rahi hai”
“ambulance ko….”
“pagal hai kya…”uske hath se phone chhenkar main bola “wo log mujhe hospital le
jayenge seedhe…”
“toh isme problem kya hai”
“prooo….blll…eeemm”bolte hue main rook gaya, kyunki ab mera seena andar se

itni teji ke sath jal raha tha ki mujhse bola bhi na gaya…lekin Nisha ko batana
zaroori tha ki main hospital kyun nahi ja sakta….isliye seene ki tez jalan ko
bardasht karte hue maine jabarjasti apna muh khola…lekin kuch bol nahi paya
“Arman , tumhari…halat mujhe thik nahi lag rahi…mujhe ambulance ko call karne
do”pareshan hote hue Nisha boli…waha aas-paas logo ki bheed bhi lagi hui
thi…lekin sab sirf mujhe dekh rahe the…waise mujhe kisi se koyi ummid bhi nahi
thi aur na hee mujhe kisi se koyi shikayat thi… because I hate everyone…..
“Armaan…”
“Armaan nahi Arman…A-r-m-a-n…”
“just shut up…”gusse se cheekhte hue Nisha ne kaha aur mere hath se mobile
chheen kar number dial karne lagi…
“samjha kar…mujhe koyi chhoti-moti type ki bimari nahi hai…jo hospital me jakar
thik ho jaunga…mujhe jo bimari hai…usme bahut time aur bahut paisa lagega aur
hospital wale mere ghar par khabar kar denge…jiske baad , wo mujhe hamesha
kahenge ki, main aaj unki vazah se zinda hoon….”apni chhati par mukke marte hue
main bola “chal, parking me chal…mujhe pata hai ki ye kaise thik hoga”
.
Meri baat sunkar bhi Nisha nahi mani aur usne ambulance ko call kar hee
diya…yani ki use mere ego ki koyi parwah hee nahi…isiliye main us-se nafrat
karta hoon…jaan ka kya hai..agle janam me mujhe dusari mil jayegi…lekin
ego…wo main ek baar tootne ke baad kaha se launga…
“main khane ke bina kuch hafte jee sakta hoon….paani ke bina kuch din aur oxygen
ke bina shayad kuch minutes….lekin ego ke bina…ego ke bina main ek second bhi
nahi jee sakta…”
Isiliye Nisha ne jaise hee ambulance ko call kiya , main parking ki taraf ladkhadate
hue teji se bhagne laga…mera irada ab ambulance ke aane se pahle waha se rafoo
chakkar hona tha….taki main hospital na ja paun…
“acha hua…car lekar aaya tha…yadi bike lekar aaya hota toh parabolic ki jagah
aaj bike chalate hue hyperbolic curve banta..chal ,ab nikal le”badbadate hue maine
car ka gate khola
87
Itne me waha Nisha bhi aa gayi…meri aankhe is waqt bahut jal rahi thi aur mujhe
sabkuch dhundhla dikhayi pad raha tha…lekin us dundhale drishya me bhi main
Nisha ka gussa dekh sakta tha…aur sath hee uska mayoos chehra bhi….car ki
chabhi uske taraf fek-kar maine us-se puchha
“car chala legi,kya…”
“ambulance aa rahi hai aur tum usi me seedhe hospital jaoge”
“yaani ki na…koyi baat nahi, main khud chala lunga”dono hath se apne sar ka
baal kheechkar main bola…jiske baad Nisha ne turant car ki chabhi uthayi aur
mujhe car ke andar baithakar driving seat par baith gayi….
“bas tum aaj zinda bach jao….phhir main kabhi tumhare sath kahi nahi jaungi”
“aise bhi koyi…bre…bre…brreeeee…..breakup karta hai kya…Nisha mera muh jam

ho ra…raha hai….by the way, nice dress…kitne me liya..ekdum kamal hai aur
sandel bhi mast hai…usme jo blue colour ki strip hai na , us…uska kya kahna…aur
hairband…wow..just amazing…tumhari aankh…tumhari aankhe aaj neeli hai,
shayad scattering ki vazah se…nahi scattering nahi….scattering nahi…lense ki
vazah se…”
Mera itna kahna tha ki Nisha car chalate hue hee rone lagi…jise dekhkar main soch
me pad gaya…ki main toh bas uski tareef kar raha tha…taaki wo normal ho
jaye…maine kuch galat kaha kya ? anyway…
“rok…rok…”achanak jor se chillate hue maine Nisha ko car rokne ke liye kaha….
“kyun kya hua…”
“mujhe mera ilaaz mil gaya…jaldi se rok…haan, rok diya….ab thoda reverse
maar….ab thoda baye le….bas..bas…tu yahi rah main abhi aaya”
Car se neeche utarkar maine apne wallet se hazar ka note nikala aur apne samne
bani daru ki dukan se ek quarter liya…..
“kyun be…mere area me toh dhayi sau ka ek pavva aata hai…tune toh teen sau kat
liye…ajab andhi chod rahe ho, lawda…khair koyi baat nahi”
Quarter lekar main car me aaya…aur Nisha se car full speed me bhagane ke liye
kaha…
“dekh be…paani ke bina kadwa toh lagega lekin ek yahi chiz hai ,jo tujhe normal
bhi karegi….naak band karke ek saans me jitna pee sakta hai pee le”
lekin main daru ki botal ka dhakkan kholta uske pahle hee car sadak par daudte
hue achanak se apne aap bahut jor se hilne lagi…Car me rakhi har ek chiz…sab
apni jagah par vibrate karne lagi….maine Nisha ki taraf dekha lekin ab wo driving
seat par nahi thi…wo driving seat se mano achanak gayab ho gayi thi,lekin car ab
bhi sadak par daud rahi thi…aur tabhi meri nazar car ke baahar samne ki taraf
88
gayi….aur saamne ka nazara dekh kar mere dimag ne kaam karna band diya
tha….itna vishal aur bhayankar drishya maine apne zindagi me aaj tak nahi dekha
tha…matlab ki koyi is drishya ko kaise describe kare….
“iski maa ka …..ye kya hai be….tsunami…” turant koodkar driving seat par aate
hue main bola aur apni seat belt kaskar bandh li
Maine dekha ki mere samne paani ki vishal dharaye tezi se meri taraf hee badh
rahi hai , wo samundar ka ufaan itna bada tha ki Nagpur ki badi-badi building bhi
bhi uske same chhoti lag rahi thi aur apne samne aane wali har chiz ko wo ukhad
kar apne sath baha rahi thi….chahe phhir wo buildings ho ya phhir sadak ke
kinare lage ped ya phhir khud sadak….maine turant car reverse mari aur full
acelerator markar car bhagane laga….mere aas paas aur bhi log the jo ki us
tsunami se bachne ke liye bhag rahe the…wo sab cheekh rahe the, chilla rahe
the…lekin Samundar ki un vishal aur bhayankar dharao ke aage un sabki aawaz
mano dab gayi thi….mere dekhte hee dekhte kitne log , kitni gadiya us sunami me
sama gayi thi lekin main bacha raha …aur bhagta raha….lekin ek agle chaurahe
par car modte waqt na jaane ek truck kaha se saamne aa gaya aur meri car ko
usne samne se thok diya jis-se meri car palti marne lagi….
.
“acha batao…hum dono pahli baar kaha mile the….”car ke sath jab main bhi palti
kha raha tha toh mujhe ye aawaz sunayi di…lekin ye aawaz toh Nisha ki thi
“kyun batau ? ja nahi batata”mere muh se ye shabd apne aap nikla ,pata nahi
kaise par mere muh se ye shabd apne aap hee nikal gaye…jaise ki bhagwan ne
script likh rakhi ho ki Arman marte waqt ye shabd bolega….lekin ye silsila yahi
nahi ruka mujhe aur bhi shabd sunayi diya aur maine kayi baar automatically
reply bhi diya
“are batao na…”
“pahle 100 de phhir bataunga”
“chalo de diya ,maan lo”
“toh maine bata diya, tu bhi maan le”
“ab samjhi…tumhe yaad hee nahi hai ki, hum pahli baar kaha mile the…hai na..”
“yaad…mujhe sab yaad rahta hai…rook thodi der”
Itna bolte hee maine gaur kiya ki main khoon se lathpath hoon aur pani ki vishal
dharaye bas mujhtak pahuchne hee waiI hai…is waqt mera sar dard nahi ho raha
tha aur na hee meri chhati jal rahi thi… maine car ke andar har us pal ko mahsoos
kiya jab main mar raha tha…maine mahsoos kiya ki kaise meri car sunami me
samayi…kaise pani tezi se meri car ke andar ghusa aur kaise mera dam ghut raha
tha aur kaise maine us car ke andar hee apna dam tod diya…..
89
“acha batao…hum dono pahli baar kaha mile the….”apni muskan jaari rakhte hue
usne mujhse pucha…
“kyun batau ? ja nahi batata…..rook …main yaha kaise main toh just abhi-abhi
mar gaya tha…”bolkar maine apne aas paas dekha toh paya ki main toh Eternity
mall me hee hoon aur mere left side…Nisha khadi hai…actually left side
nahi….right side me…maine gaur kiya mere pure kapde sukhe hai aur paani ka
koyi nam-o-nishan tak nahi tha…
“Arman batao na hum pahli baar kaha mile the…”
“kya ye real hai ya ye bhi mera hallucination hai”
“acha ab main samjhi ,tumhe yaad hee nahi ki hum pahli baar kaha mile the”
“PVR me mile the…kitni baar batau…aur yadi tu mujhse zara sa bhi…electron ke

size ke barabar bhi pyar karti hai toh please do minute ke liye chup ho ja…”
“okay….”mera hath pakad kar bachcho ki tarah hilate hue Nisha boli….
.
Maine apna sar jor se hilaya aur sochne laga ki actually ho kya raha hai….
“main Nisha ke sath Dominos me tha…jaha humne pizza order kiya ,lekin main
pizza khata uske pahle hee mere sar me tez dard shuru ho gaya aur Nisha mujhe
waha se bahar le aayi…jiske baad maine daru li lekin usi samay Nisha car se
achanak chhoo mantar ho gayi aur car vibrate hone lagi….ye vibration aksar usi
samay hota hai…jab main apne banaye virtual world se haqiqat me laut raha hota
hoon…yani ki mujhe us samay jab car vibrate ho rahi thi…tab haqiqat me laut
aana chahiye tha…lekin aisa hua nahi aur main wahi raha…jiske baad ek truck ne
meri car ko thoka aur phhir us car me marne ke baad main wapas yaha aaya…toh
kya ye haqiqat hai ? lag toh yahi raha hai…par sochane wali baat ye hai ki jab car
vibrate kar rahi thi toh main wapas kyun nahi aa paya….khamkha mujhe marne
ka experience lena pada…sala us sunami me dum ghutne ko main abhi bhi
mahsoos kar sakta hoon..anyway, ant bhala toh sab bhala”
“Arman chalo, Dominos me chalte hai..”mera hath pakad kar hilate hue Nisha
mujhse boli
“Dominos…pagal hai kya, sunami aa jayegi…Dominos me”
“sunami….? toh phhir kaha chale”
“ bar chal, aaj tujhe daru pilata hoon”

.
main aur Nisha Eternity ke andar bane beer bar ya disco bar…jo bhi kah lo…uske
andar gaye aur ek kone ki table pakad kar baith gaye…main chah raha tha ki

90
Nisha mere kinare me mujhse bilkul satkar baithe…wo mere paas baithi toh thi par
satkar nahi…
“itna door hee baithna hota toh main beer bar ke mid point me tere sath baithta
na…jaha roshni hai…yaha andhere me nahi”kahte hue main intezaar karne laga ki
Nisha ab mere karib aayegi…lekin jab wo mere karib nahi aayi toh main hee uski
taraf khisak gaya aur uske kandhe par hath rakh kar bola…
“acha Nisha ,ye bata…kya legi pahle aur kaha legi”
“maza ya sprite…”
“white maza ?”
“Arrmaaaan….”
“dil pe mat le…mazak kar raha tha…chal acha , tu aaj mujhse kuch bhi puch
le…main uska sahi jawab dunga…phhir main tujhse kuch puchunga jiska tujhe bhi
sahi jawab dena padega”
“sach”
“haan”apna hath Nisha ke kandhe se neeche le jaate hue main bola
“mujhe sochne do…hmmm…acha ye batao ,tumhari favorite actress kaun si hai…”
“koyi si bhi nahi….”
“tumne bola tha ki, tum mujhe sach bataoge….”
“toh sach hee toh bata raha hoon…meri favorite actress time to time change hoti
rahti hai…zaroorat ke hisab se ”
“ok…ab ye batao ki tum mere sath Mardani aur Mary Kom movie dekhne kyun
nahi aaye the…”
“main wo movie bilkul nahi dekhta, jisme koyi lady lead role me ho… isliye tere
sath nahi aaya tha…kyunki mujhe feeling nahi aati”
“toh kya iska matlab ye hai ki tum sexist ho….jo ladke-ladki me bhedbhav karte ho
”
“maybe…I dont know…”Nisha ke boobs par apna hath le jakar rakhte hue main
bola
“aur puch na kuch, maza aa raha hai”
“tumhara favorite actor kaun hai…”
“isme main thoda confuse hoon..matlab do favorite hai…”
“ek toh Robert Downey Jr. hai aur dusara…? ”

91
“wahi apne Jackie dada…Black pearl wale…”
“acha wo…Jack Sparrow”
“Captain Jack Sparrow… ”bolkar main Nisha ke ek boobs ko sahlane laga aur jab
usne koyi virodh nahi kiya toh maine thoda aur force apply kiya aur uske boobs ko
dabana shuru kar diya…
“acha ye batao Arman….”
“ho gaya na…kitna puchegi…ab meri bari…”Nisha ke boobs ko pura bheenchkar

main bola
“nahi..ek …eee..kkk…ek aur…tumhari favorite story kaun hai aur favorite

writer…let me guess Chetan Bhagat”
“Munshi Premchand….the Vampire , Shakespeare aur favorite story hai

Godan…Bunglow no.13 ,Dead never lie…ab tera time khatm hua aur mujhe afsos
hai ki tune itna acha mauka gawa diya…matlab tu mujhse kuch bhi puch sakti
thi…kuch bhi matlab kuch bhi…lekin tune ise aise hee gawa diya…aur ab main
puchhunga”
maine apna hath hatakar wapas Nisha ke kandhe par rakha aur dheere dheere
uski dress ke andar neeche sarkane laga aur jaise hee mera hath Nisha ke dress ke
andar uski bra se touch hua maine us-se pucha…
“tune bra kaun si colour ki pahni hai”
“light blue”
“aur neeche wala”
“panty ?”
“hmm”
“same color”
Nisha ki bra ke andar hath dalte hee mera rom-rom machal utha tha , maine
dusara hath Nisha ki jangh par rakha aur ahiste-ahiste uski choot tak pahuch
gaya….ab Nisha bhi full mood me aa gayi thi aur use kiss karne ke liye maine jaise
hee apne honth uske honth ke karib laye toh us andhere me mujhe Nisha ke baju me
ek aur ladki baithi hui dikhai di…jo ki mujhe hee ghoor rahi thi…uski aankhe surkh
laal thi aur baal bikhre hue hawa me lahra rahe the…….
“Aradhna…? ”darkar maine Nisha ko ek jhatke me khud se alag kiya
“kaun Aradhna”

92
“Aradhna matlab…prathna…mera mann kar raha hai ki main tumhari Aradhna

karu…room me le jakar”apni jagah par khada hote hue main bola “chal…yaha
se…”
“lekin kyun”
“ashleel ladki…chal, chalkar kuch khate peete hai…bahut bhookh lagi hai mujhe”
“Dominos”
“tujhe bataya toh tha ki, waha jaunga toh sunami aa jayegi…tujhe kya…tu toh car
se achanak gayab ho jayegi…marna toh mujhe padega….chal chalkar samosa
khate hai”
“sunami…car ,ye kya bol rahe ho tum…mujhe toh kuch bhi samajh nahi aa raha
hai”
“ye sab psychological baate hai…teri samajh me nahi aayegi”

.
Nisha ke sath ghanto Eternity me ghumne ke baad humne ek movie dekhi aur phhir
River View Colony ke liye ravana ho gaye…
“Desai ji kuch nahi bolenge kya ki tu kaha thi…”hum River View se kuch hee doori
par the toh maine Nisha se puchha
“nahi…aur yadi wo puchhenge toh main bol dungi ki main na..shopping karne gayi
thi…Shipra aur Sonam ke sath….par mujhe maloom hai ki wo nahi puchhenge ”
“badhiya hai…ye bata ki kya sach me tera necklace dedh lakh ka hai…ya fake rahi
hai”
“isme koyi shaq hai kya…mere paas toh dhayi laakh ka bhi hai…wo main tumhe
kal dikhaungi”
“tu toh mere ummid se jyada rahis hai….do-char laakh mujhe udhar de de…”
“mere account me abhi seventy thousands hai bas…chahiye toh bolo”
“rahne de…kitni achi hai tu Nisha…kash ki tere jaise wo bhi hoti…”
“wo ? kaun wo ?”
“koyi nahi…”
“batao na kaun”muhe pakad kar hilate hue Nisha puchhi…
Nisha ke is sawal par main kuch der chup raha aur phhir ek jordar lambi saans li
lekin main apni wo lambi saans complete kar pata uske pahle hee Nisha ek aur
baar mujhe hila kar puchhi.... "wo kaun ? "

93
“arey Sonam…! aur kaun.... kash ki tere jaise hee Sonam bhi hoti toh Varun kitna
lucky rahta”kahte hue maine car apne flat ke saamne rok di aur Nisha ki taraf
dekha…wo kafi khush lag rahi thi…mere muh se apni tareef sunkar….
“acha,Arman… ok…bye…Good Night”car se utar kar usne mujhse kaha….
“good night…tumhara Necklace acha hai”
“main janti hoon…thank you”apne ghar ki taraf jate hue palat kar mujhse boli…
“tumhari sandel bhi mast hai…khaskar ke usme lagi blue strip”
“thanks…ab jao bhi”ek baar phhir palatkar Nisha ne mujhe thanks kaha
“aur tumhara ,hairband kamal ka hai…kal mujhe de dena…main bhi

lagaunga….”bolkar main intezaar karne laga ki Nisha ek baar phhir thanks
bolegi….lekin abki baar uski taraf se koyi responce nahi aaya….shayad usne meri
aawaz hee na suni ho ya phhir sunkar ansuna kar diya ho…God Knows.
Nisha aaj bahut khush thi….lekin gaur karne walI baat jo thi ki kya main khush
tha ? kya mujhe Nisha wakayi me utni achi lagti hai jitna ki main uske achi hone
ka dikhawa karta hoon….? kya Nisha mere layak hai…? Yadi gaur kiya jaye aaj ke
incidents par toh in teeno ka jawab jo milta hai wo hai….Naa.
Car rakhne ke baad maine daru aur bisleri ki botal ek-ek jeb me bhari aur room
lock karke park ki taraf chal diya….raat ke dus baj chuke the aur park band ho
chuka tha…isliye park me mere daru peene ka ye best time tha….maine botal
deewar par rakhi aur deewar chadhne ke liye apna hath deewar par rakha hee tha
ki kisi ne mujhe peeche se aawaz di….
.
“hey mister…kaun ho tum…aur itni raat ko park ke paas kya kar rahe ho”
“chal na be…nikal yaha se…”bina pichhe mude deewar par chadhne ki koshish
karte hue main bola….lekin isi beech uski aawaz phhir se mere kaano me gunji…
“main tumhe last warning de rahi hoon…seedhe se neeche utarte ho ya police ko

call karu”
“warning de rahi hoon….rahi hoon…? yani ki ek ladki…par iski aawaz sunkar

mujhe aisa kyun laga ki aawaz kisi ladke ki hai…kya ab mere liye male aur female
ki aawaz ko pahchan pana bhi mushqil ho gaya hai…? ek minute , brain ko refresh
karta hoon ….” maine apna sar jor se hilaya jisase mujhe uski aawaz kisi ladki ki
aawaz ki tarah lagne lagi
“tum peeche mudo…kahi chori karne toh nahi aaye yaha”
“haan…ab thik hai ..ab iski aawaz lag rahi hai ki kisi ladki ki hai”peeche mudkar
main bola“par ye ladki nahi hai….ye toh ek budhiya hai…”
“hey…buddhi kisko bola…”

94
“chalo na aunty…kyun dimag kha reli ho….”
“abhi main police ko phone karti hoon”
“us se kya hoga”
“wo tumhe pakad ke le jayenge”
“aur yadi uske pahle ,main apko jaan se markar bhag gaya toh…soch kar
dekho…sochne wali baat hai”
“Kya matlab hai tumhara”sakpaka kar peeche hat-te hue us aunty ne mujhse
pucha
“janeman ,main toh kitne din se tumhare intezaar me tha…aur aaj tum aa gayi…
main abhich chaku se tumhara pet fadunga aur tumhari kaleji ko chakna ke taur
par istemal karke daru piyunga ”kahte hue maine apni jacket me hath dala hee tha
ki wo aurat udhar se khishak li aur uske udhar se khisakte hee main bhi udhar se
khisak liya….
Agle din subah maine Varun ke through Shipra…Nisha…Sonam….David aur 5-6

logo ko raat me party ka invitation diya…jiske taiyari ki sari jimmedari Varun ki
thi….siway ek kaam ke. Aur wo ek kaam tha beer aur daru kharid kar lana….jise
main karne wala tha….par mujhe tension is baat ki nahi thi ki..itna sara intezam
Varun akele kaise kaise karega….balki mujhe tension is baat ki thi ki aaj office me
Vandana Rathi mera kya haal karegi….kal toh maine leave le liya tha….lekin aaj
mujhe har haal me office pahuchna tha….aur Vandana mam ka samna karna
tha….main abhi isi soch me dooba hua tha ki mujhe pata hee nahi laga ki kab auto
me mere bagal me ek ladki aakar baith gayi aur shayad mujhe pure raste bhar ye
pata na chalta yadi wo jor-jor se phone me baat na karti toh….aur jab main hosh
me aaya toh maine tirachhi nazar se use dekha….
“item….kya khushboo mar reli hai baap , mann toh karta hai ki auto me hee taang
utha kar chod du…”tirachhi nazar se use dekhte hue maine socha….
“bhaiya ,auto thoda dheere karna toh….aawaz thik se sunayi nahi de rahi hai”auto
wale ke kandhe par hath rakh kar wo boli aur auto wale ki mazal ki wo uski baat
na mane , auto wale ne turant auto ki speed kam kar di….
Shuru me toh mera dil kiya ki auto wale ko bolu ki auto ki speed kam na
kare…mujhe office ke liye der ho raha hai…lekin phhir maine socha ki jitna hee
dheere wo auto chalayega ,utni hee der tak main aur wo maal ek dusare ke sath ,ek
hee seat me rahenge….aur waise bhi Rathi mujhe pelne wali hai hee toh phhir jaldi
jaane ka kya fayda….yahi sochkar main chup raha….
“haan ,hello…main Khushboo bol rahi hoon…ye mera new number hai….Dileep ko
ye number de dena aur bolna ki mujhe call kare….”thoda tez aawaz me wo boli…
“Dileep…huh ,ghatiya name”

.
95
Sharda Vihar pahuchne ke baad maine sabse pahle jo ek kaam kiya ki main sabse
pahle bathroom gaya aur phhir wapas aakar do glass paani piya….
“kya ladki thi…kuch der ke liye toh mere rom-rom me rum sama gaya tha….use
abhi tak mahsoos kar sakta hoon main… ”
“Arman ,bhau…Vandana madam boli hai ki jaise hee aap aaoge toh aapko unke
cabin me bheju”mere paas aakar Jagat ne mujhe Rathi mam ka farman sunaya
“gusse me hai kya….”
“wo toh hardum gusse me rahti hai…mujhe toh lagta hai ki Vandana mam , Hulk
hai…jo har dum gusse me rahti hai”
Vandana Rathi ne mujhe cabin me bulaya hai…ye sunkar maine ek glass paani aur
piya aur seedhe uske cabin me pravesh kiya….
“aapne mujhe bulaya mam…”masoomiyat ke sath Vandana Rathi ki taraf dekh kar
main bola….
“mujhe tumse kuch nahi bolna…tum jaiso ko main bahut ache tarike se janti
hoon…tumhare samne table me do letter pade hai…jisme se ek blank hai ”
Maine samne dekha aur jaisa ki Vandana Rathi Ne kaha tha ,mere samne table par
do letter fold kiye hue rakhe the….
“un do me se ek balank hai aur ek jo blank nahi hai ,wo tumhara resignation letter
hai ,jisme tum sign karoge”apna gala fadte hue Vandana mam boli…“aur yadi
tumhe resignation letter par sign nahi karna hai toh, jo dusara blank letter
hai…uspar tum mujhse maafi magoge aur is office me kaam karne wale har ek
member ka sign loge….ab choice tumhari hai ki tum kya choose karna chahte ho ”
“par mam ye toh sarasar…”
“no sorry…no excuse…”
Maine Vandana Rathi ki taraf dekha….kitna ghamand tha uske andar aur kaise
choot jaisi shakl bana kar wo mujhpe baras rahi thi…par ye samay josh me aane
ka nahi tha…kyunki , mujhe is naukri ki shakt zaroorat thi upar se main naukri
milne ki khushi me aaj raat ko sabko party bhi de raha tha…yadi josh josh me
maine resignation letter par sign kar diya toh kya bolunga un sabse…David toh isi
intezaar me baitha rahta hai ki kab wo mujhe neecha dikha sake….abhi tak toh
main isliye itna udd raha tha kyunki mere paas naukri thi…Varun ko kya bolunga
aur kab tak uske paise par aish karta rahunga…maine gaur kiya hai ki jabse
maine Sharda Vihar join kiya hai wo mujhse khush rahta hai….warna pahle kabhi-
kabhi wo mujhse chidh jata tha… in sabhi problems ko main door kar sakta hoon
sirf ek letter se, jisme mujhe Vandana Rathi se sirf sorry bolna tha aur office me
kaam karne wale pure staff ke sirf signature lene the…simple…ye baat alag hai ki
phhir office me kaam karne wale sare log mujhpar hasenge aur meri izzat down ho
jayegi…lekin itna toh main kar hee sakta hoon….
96
“toh , kya choose kiya tumne…”meri khilli udane wale andaz me R.Rathi mujhse
puchhi...
“Resignation……”maine jawab diya
Chapter-12 : Life & Engineering
“what…..seriously ?”apni aankhe badi karke Vandana Rathi boli….jiske jawab me

maine apne jeb se goggle nikalkar pahana…
“that’s Shri Arman for you………bitches….ye raha resignation letter me mera

sign…”
Resignation letter me sign markar main utha aur seedhe Sharda Vihar ke bahar
aaya…aur angadayi lete hue khud se kaha “BC, phhir se berojgar…ab phhir se
resume dalna padega…phhir se interview dena padega aur phhir se naye logo se
milna padega….that’s why i hate everyone”
.
Kitna ajeeb ittefaq tha ki jis din main apne naukri lagne ki party de raha tha usi
din meri naukri mujhse chhoot gayi thi…par main ye sab kisi ko nahi bata sakta
tha…na Nisha ko aur na hee Varun ko….isliye aaj mujhe mere naukri lagne ki
party deni hee thi…maine Sharda complex ke paas bane ATM me apna balance
check kiya….jis factory me main pahle kaam karta tha un logo ne mere teen
mahine ki salary mujhe naukri se nikalte waqt de di thi aur usme se ab mere paas
kitna bacha hai yahi check karne ke liya main ATM me ghusa….
“ bas 30,000…itne se kya hoga …jaldi hee dusari job dhoondani padegi…ek kidney
bech doon kya ,BC…pura tension hee khatm”
“wo bhi koyi nahi lega,…alchoholic kidney”
“toh phhir kya karu”
“itna ameer dost hai, itni ameer girlfriend hai…aur kya chahiye tujhe , bas dono se
ladayi mat karna….”
“ tera matlab equilibrium phenomenon use karu…matlab ki dono ke sath

equilibrium me rahu ? ”
“yo, Version 3.0”
“samajh gaya…ab dekh main kaise Equilibrium banata hoon …thanx , Version 2.0”
“ you’re most welcome….3.0”

.
Sharda Enterprises se nikale jaane ke baad chahe main jitna bhi cool rahne ka
dikhawa kar loon…chahe jitne bhi jokes maru ya chutiyapa karu…par haqiqat toh
ye thi ki main andar se bahut udas tha isliye main chup chap auto me bina koyi
97
bawal khada kiye apne room pahucha aur room pahuchte hee maine dekha ki
waha ka toh mahol hee alag hai….mere flat me is waqt Varun apne kuch dosto ke
sath flat ko sajane me laga hua tha aur un sabko lead kar rahi thi…Sonam
maaadharchod…choot ki jhat…. maine dekha ki Sonam mere bed par khadi
hokar…mere bed pe khadi hokar…mere…bed…peeee….khadi….hoo…kar…Varun &
comapany ko instruction de rahi thi…wo kabhi kisi ko ,chair idhar se udhar
khiskane ko bolti toh kabhi kisi ko fugga fulane ke liye bol rahi thi….Varun toh BC
balcony me jhadu mar raha tha….. gandu ,sala….
“itna chutiyapa kaise kar lete hai ye log….itna khush toh tab main khud nahi tha ,
jab meri job lagi thi….upar se ab toh Rathi ne laat markar bhaga diya hai….aur
Varun…ye toh ,lawda…choot ke peeche pata nahi kya-kya karega….pahle Reema
aur ab Sonam….wo toh friendynamic ke mere first law ne mujhe rok rakha
hai…warna Sonam ko aisa jhadta ki har jagah se jhad jati….dekho toh BC ko kaise
role pel rahi hai ,wo bhi mere bistar par khade hokar….aur lawda ye Varun….ise
koyi kaam dham nahi hai kya….”un sabko waha dekhkar maine socha aur phhir
plan kiya ki sar dard ka bahana markar chupke se ek kinare aankh band karke sad
songs sununga…
“arey Arman..aaj tu ,itni jaldi aa gaya”mujhe dekhkar Varun ne jhadu wahi

balcony me feka aur mere paas aaya….
“kya isi din ke liye uncle-aunty ne tujhe pal poskar bada kiya tha ki tu ek ladki ke
kahne par jhadu mare….aur ye kya natak laga rakha hai be…ye fugga-vugga kyun
fula rahe ho…”
“guess kar”
“isme guess karne wali kaun si baat hai…mere naukri chhootne I mean mere
naukri lagne ki khushi me party hone wali hai…”
“pagal hai kya…uske liye main itni taiyari karunga kya…guess kar”
“bata na”
“Sonam se main ab shadi karunga….”
“shadi…aur Sonam se…abey, tera dimag toh sahi hai na aur tu mujhe ab bata raha
hai…matlab ye sab kab….kaise…kyun…what the fuck…”
Sonam se Varun shadi karne ke mood me hai, ye sunkar mere chehre ka rang hee
udd gaya…matlab rang toh pahle se hee uda hua tha par ab mera pura chehra
rangheen ho gaya tha…mujhe samajh nahi aata ki mere jaan pahchan wale aksar
usi shaks se shadi kyun karte hai,jise main pasand nahi karta hoon…pahle Vipin
bhaiya ne Pandey ji ki badi beti se shadi ki…matlab karne wale the aur ab Varun ,
Sonam ke sath set hone ja raha hai…
“toh ye party mere naukri lagne ki khushi me nahi hai”
“do-do baar party dega kya naukri lagne ki khushi me… ? ”
“do-do bar se tera matlab..”jeb se cigarette nikalkar muh me fasate hue maine
puchha…
98
“dekh yaha abhi Sonam hai aur thodi der me uski friends bhi aa jayegi toh please
cigarette mat pi…”mere muh se cigarette nikal kar dustbin me nishana lagakar
Varun bola… “I missed it ….as expected….Arman, tu kaise kar leta hai ye ”
“yadi nishana kharab hai toh thoda daye ya baye nishana laga…guarantee toh
nahi hai par kabhi-kabhi tukka lag jata hai aur main kaise karta hoon, ye toh na
hee main tujhe bata sakta hoon aur na hee tu samajh sakta hai…I mean…isme
angle…height…dustbin se distance …sab calculate karna padta hai…khair chhod
,tu kya bol raha tha ki main do-do party dunga kya naukri ki ? par wo toh maine
Nisha ko di hai na …tum logo ko kaha di…ab ye mat bolna ki Nisha ko party de
di…matlab tum sabko de di…seedhe-seedhe bol ki tune Sonam ke kahne par meri
party cancel kar di hai…ye jyada ghuma-fira kar baat karne ki na toh mujhe aadat
hai aur na hee sunne ki…”
“tu Mazak kar raha hai na…”thoda haste hue Varun ne mujhse kaha
“no..”
“abey kal hee toh tune hum sabko ,is flat me party di thi…tu maal(ganja) peekar
aaya hai kya aur tu Nisha ke sath mall kal nahi parso gaya tha”
“ab, tu Mazak kar raha hai…”
“dekh Arman mere paas faltu baat ke liye time nahi hai…kya, tujhe sach me kal
raat ka kuch bhi yaad nahi hai…ya tu bas aise hee time pass kar raha hai…yadi
timepass kar raha hai toh thik hai, warna tu mere sath abhi doctor ke paas
chal”bolte hue Varun ne apna mobile jeb se nikala aur mujhe kal raat ki photos
dikhane laga…
“ye dekh…tu kaise kal daru pee ke langar dance kar raha tha…”
“actually main, Mazak kar raha tha…yar…tu toh janta hee hai mujhe”Varun ke
hath se maine mobile liya aur apne bistar par ek kinare jakar baith gaya….
.
“Ye photo to meri hee hai aur location bhi humare flat ki hee hai…”apna sar ko ek
hath se dabate hue Varun ke mobile me apne photos ko dekhkar maine socha“toh
kya iska matlab Varun sach kah raha tha…? par mujhe toh kal raat ka kuch bhi
yaad nahi…kal raat ka kya mujhe toh kal din ka bhi kuch yaad nahi hai…ye kaise
mumkin hai…kahi ye sab log milkar mujhse koyi game toh nahi khel rahe…par in
photos me toh main bhi full enjoy kar raha hai…phhir mujhe kal ka kaise kuch yad
nahi hai…chalo maan lete hai ki maine pel ke daru pee hogi aur mujhe kuch yaad
nahi raha hoga…lekin BC kal pura din maine kya kiya…office toh gaya
nahi..warna resignation letter Vandana Rathi kal hee thama deti…kya ho raha hai
ye…situation toh din ba din bigadti ja rahi hai…kuch toh sochna padega…”
“Arman, ek kaam kar doge kya….”mere bistar par khadi Sonam ne jab mujhe
pukara toh mera dhyan uski taraf gaya aur maine haan me apni garden hilayi….
“balloons shayad kam pad jayenge…tum jakar do packet aur le aaoge please”
“balloons matlab”maine pucha

99
Aur mere aisa puchhte hee waha mauzood har ek shaks chauk gaya , wo sab jo-jo
kaam kar rahe the ,wo sab kaam chhodkar meri taraf dekhne lage…jisase main
samajh gaya ki zaroor maine kuch aisa kiya hai, jo ekdum se unexpected raha
hoga….
“Sonam, tumne kya kaha…maine thik se suna nahi”
“maine kaha ki, balloons kam pad jayenge…tum dukan se aur do packet le aao”
“main hoon lene jata balloons….mera matlab main balloons lene jata hoon”apne
laal hue chehre par hath ferkar main bola aur flat se bahar aa gaya
“balloons…what the hell is this…”google me search marte hue main badbadaya aur
jab mujhe balloons ki pics google me dikhi toh maine apna sar peet liya…
“ise balloons kahte hai…balloon ….balloons ….balloon….lagta hai aaj kal jo mere
dimag me chal raha hai us-se mere sochne samajhne ki Shakti par bhi asar pad
raha hai…warna main kya ye nahi janunga ki balloon ka matlab kya hota hai…
faltu me bezzati ho gayi”
.
“kya chahiye….”jab main ek dukan par gaya toh us dukan wale ne mujhe dekh kar
kaha
“mujhe…kya bolte hai use….”kahte hue main apne hath ko gol gol ghumane laga
taki dukandar samajh jaye ki mujhe kya chahiye….maine apne muh ke andar
hawa bharkar hanuman ji ke mafiq apna muh bhi fulaya ,lekin dukandar
samajhne ki bajay meri taraf gusse se dekhne laga….
“chal be ,nikal…pagal sala”meri ajeeb –ajeeb harkate dekhkar dukandar ne kaha
“kis chutiye ko dukan me baitha ke rakhe ho be….grahak ko gali deta hai..ye sale
naukar”
“naukar kisko bola be…tu naukar kisko bola”meri taraf taav se badhte hue wo
cheekha..
“yaha tere aalawa aur koyi hai kya be…jo kisi aur bolunga…tujhe hee bola”
“aise kaise tune mujhe naukar bola…”
“dekh bhai…tera role jyada nahi hai…isliye jyada dialogue bol kar scene lamba
mat kar….aur jaldi se do packet…ye de….”bolkar maine mobile me dukandar ko
balloons ki pic dikhayi ,jo maine raste me download kar li thi…
“nahi dunga…”
“dekh lawda, jyada mat uchak….warna muh me mutth mar dunga…”
“teri toh…ruk tu”bahar meri taraf badhte hue wo phhir cheekha….

100
jiske turant baad maine mere samne dukan me rakhi chocolates ke dibbe me se ek
dibba uthaya aur uska dhakkan kholkar pura ka pura dibba wahi zameen me
bikher diya….Mere dwara dibba kholkar chocolates bikherne ke karan ab
dukandar meri taraf na aakar neeche giri hui chocolates uthane me lag gaya tha
aur main bade aaram se waha se khisak liya…….
.
“kitni der kar di tumne Arman….kya kar rahe the tum itni der…”jab main room
pahucha toh gusse se Sonam mujhse boli….
“Sonam…teri na, main maa chod dunga…tu mujhse baat mat kiya kar”
“ab aise kya dekh rahe ho…kuch bologe bhi….”abki baar aur tez se Sonam boli
“kya ise gali sunayi nahi di ? ya maine gali di hee nahi ?”
“chhodo bhi…”mere hath se balloons ka packet chheenkar Sonam ne mujhe

dhikkara aur saaj sajawat ke kaam me wapas busy ho gayi….
Mera khas dost Varun shadi karne ka faisla le raha tha...isliye mujhe khush hona
chahiye tha aur raat ko jo function rakha gaya tha usme uski madad karna
chahiye tha lekin is samay na toh main khush tha aur na hee unki koyi madad kar
raha tha….Varun ne jab balcony me jhadu mar diya toh main balcony me jakar
khada ho gaya aur balcony me khade hokar colony me bane flats ko dekhne laga…
“Vandana Rathi ka flat , wo udhar hoga… E Series me…raat me jakar sali ko

tochan du kya ?…lekin agar usne police me complain kar di toh ? chhod deta hoon
randi ko….warna khamkha police ka lafda ho jayega…”
Isliye filhal maine Vandana mam ko tochan dene ka khayal apne mann se nikala
aur colony me bane dusare makan ki taraf dekhne laga….main waha bahut der tak
khada raha aur waha bane makano ka deedar karta raha…aur phhir kisi ne peeche
se mujhe aawaz di…
“ja be…Varun bula raha hai…kahi jana hai usko”
“Varun ..mujhe bula raha hai….par....”
Main apni baat bhi complete nahi kar paya tha ki mujhe aisa laga jaise kisi ne koyi
bhari chiz mere sar par de mari ho….mera pura bheja hil gaya aur uske baad ek
baar phhir se mujhe wahi aawaz sunayi dobara di….matlab dobara sunayi di
“tune mujhe mara…teri toh”gusse se tharrate hue main peeche palta aur jaise hee
peeche muda mera pura gussa chhoo mantar ho gaya…..
“Vipin bhaiya…? ”
101
“dekh Arman…tujhe toh pata hee hai ki papa ko tera Varun ke sath ghoomna
pasand nahi hai aur wo Varun….ye sab jante hue bhi tujhse milne aaya hai”
“aaj taarikh kaun si hai”
“15th July ”
“ 2009 ?”
Maine Vipin bhaiya se saal kya puch liya ,wo mujhe aise dekhne lage jaise maine
unse saal nahi balki unki item ka figure puchh liya ho….
“haan…2009 hee chal raha hai ”
“15th july , 2009…yani abhi hum dono ki school me ladayi nahi hui hai…”
“kya matlab hai tera ki hum dono ki ladayi nahi hui hai…kal hee toh maine tujhe
ground me do thappad mara tha…”
“ye sab Psychological baatein hai…aapke palle nahi padegi…aur kal ground me do
thappad mara toh mara…faltu me audience ko batakar meri bezzati kyun kar rahe
ho…anyway…”bolkar main apne ghar ki balcony se neeche aaya , jaha Varun sofe
par baithkar mera intezaar kar raha tha…..
waha mere mammi-papa dono mauzood the aur mujhe seedhiyo se neeche aata
dekh mujhe ghoor kar dekhne lage…mano mann hee mann mujhse kah rahe ho
ki….yadi main, Varun ke sath abhi bahar gaya toh mera hath kaat kar mere hath
me de denge….
“hey Varun…aaj kiske sath match hai…”seedhiyo se neeche aakar maine Varun se
puchha…
“S.S.M. ki team se…”
“chal phhir…”
Main Varun ke sath bahar aaya aur bahar aate hee uspar baras lada…
“kyun bhai…ghar se nikalwayega kya…kitni baar kaha hai ki mere ghar mat aaya
kar…yadi yahi haal raha toh tu dekhna ek din mere gharwale mere pichhwade me
laat markar mujhe ghar se nikal denge…..chal bol kya baat hai… ”
“family problem ? ”
“ab tere us Engineer bhai ne kya kar diya…yahi hota hai jab har koyi bhi
engineering karne lagta hai toh….anyway ,chal bata kya problem hai…”
Jawab me Varun chup hee raha ,isliye maine thoda aur bal lagakar kaha….
“abki baar tere bade bhai ne kuch kya…ya phhir tere baap ne…”

102
“bhaiya aur papa ke beech phhir kaha suni ho gayi hai…papa ne bhaiya ko itna
sunaya ki wo suicide karne ki dhamki dekar ghar se chale gaye hai…mujhe ab
bahut dar lag raha hai yar…samajh me nahi aa raha ki kya karu…kaha
jaun…maine bhaiya ko bahut dhoondha lekin wo mile hee nahi…isliye tere paas aa
gaya ”
“kitne der pahle ghar se nikle the…”
“do ghante pahle…aisa mom ne bataya…main toh Gaurav ke sath bahar ghoom
raha tha…. ”
“kaun Gaurav …wahi D section wala…”
“haan…”
“uske sath mat ghuma kar…uski niyat kharab hai…matlab mujhe sahi nahi lagta
wo…acha time bata…”
“5 baje hai…”
jab actual me yani ki jab main version 1.0 ke roop me 2009 me tha tab Varun ke
bhaiya ko dhoondate dhoondate raat ho gayi thi…lekin ab jab ye sab main ek baar
pahle bhi jhel chuka tha…isliye mujhe pata tha ki mujhe kaha jana hai…
“mujhe maloom hai ki tera bhai kaha hoga”
“sach..?”apna stress thoda kam karte hue Varun ne puchha…
“haan…lekin ab tu ye mat puchhna ki ye sab mujhe kaise pata…bas tu mere sath

chal…”
“ok…”
“aur sale tu mere liye ek shayari likhne wala tha…ek mahine ho gaye lekin tune
mujhe shayari nahi sunayi…lagta hai tu mera sachcha dost nahi hai..main
khamkha tere liye itna kuch kar jata hoon ”
“aaj raat me pakka…”
“lawda ,yahi bol-bol ke kitne din tarka diye tune…”ye kahkar maine apna hath
bandha aur ek mukka Varun ki peeth me pel diya….
“itni tez….abey sach me…maine toh ek line soch bhi li hai…sunau kya ?”apni peeth
sahlate hue Varun bola aur kheechkar ek mukka usne bhi meri peeth me rel diya…
“haa…suna”main bhi apni peeth sahlate hue bola
“toh sun…Arz kiya hai…”
“irshaad..irshaad”

103
“arz kiya hai…Aasmano ke falaq par kuch rang aaj bhi baki hai…”
“aage bol…”
“bas itna hee socha hai abhi…”
“teri toh…abhi tak sirf jhat barabar line sochi hai…wo bhi galat…”ek mukka phhir
Varun ki peeth me pelte hue main bola aur abki baar maine bahut jor se mukka
pela tha…taaki Varun…mukke ka reply mukke se na karke dard se cheekhte hue
kare aur aisa hee hua…
Varun ki gand fat gayi aur wo jaha par khada tha wahi dard se karahte hue baith
gaya…thodi der tak toh usne sirf mujhe galiya di aur phhir jab uska dard kuch
normal hua toh khade hokar mujhse puchha…
“kaun se shabd galat hai be…”
“aasman ko urdu me falaq kahte hai…ab gaur kar…aasmano ke falaq par kuch
rang aaj bhi baaki hai…”
“feel the pain, man…feel the pain…”
“kaisa pain…mujhe toh koyi pain hee nahi hai…”
“aayega…pain bhi aayega…aur tab ye line complete ho jayegi…”
“ok then..”bolte hue main achanak ruka….
Main ruka kyunki maine dekha ki samne se exams me mere peeche baithne wala
lawda…I mean launda bike me akele kahi se aa raha tha…un dino bike ka name hee
mujhe super excited kar deta tha aur mujhe jab-jab mauka milta tha main yun hee
dosto ki bike mang kar chalane lag jata tha….dosto ki bike…kyunki gharwali bike
par toh Vipin bhaiya ne kabja jama rakha tha aur wo mujhe bike kya…bike ki
chabhi tak chhune nahi dete the…
.
“rook be…”wo ladka jiska roll number aksar exams me mere baad aata tha uske
samne jakar maine kaha. maine use kyun roka hai…ye usne shayad pahle hee taad
liya tha…isliye main use kuch bolta uske pahle hee wo bol utha…
“Arman , abhi mujhe urgent kaam hai…isliye main tujhe bike nahi de sakta”
“aisa…chal phhir thik hai”uske samne se hatkar main bola “exams me jab tu
mujhse koyi question puchhega toh main bhi yahi bolunga ki…bhai mujhe urgent
kaam hai…main tujhe abhi iska answer nahi bata sakta”
“thik hai..acha chal, le jaa…jab dekho tab exams ki dhamki deta rahta hai…”bike se
utarte hue usne kaha…

104
“thanks…”bike ka handle pakadte hue main muskuraya aur Varun ko peechhe

baithne ka ishara kiya…
“main nahi baithunga...last time jab tere sath baitha tha toh tune gira diya
tha…”door hat te hue Varun ne bike me baithne se saaf mana kar diya…
“abey baith ja…wo tab ki baat thi…ab toh main bike se…parablla..hyperbola bana
leta hoon…wooooooo”bike ka handle ghumate hue main bola “aaj ellipse
banaunga ”
“tu chahe jitna bol le…main nahi baithne wala…last time tune mujhse bike
nikalwayi aur phhir bike girakar bhag gaya tha…wo bhi mujhe akela
chhodkar…pata hai gharwalo ne kitni galiya di mujhe…”
“kyun bhav kha raha hai..baith na yar…ya ab Shahrukh khan ke mafiq ‘main hoon
na’ bolu tabhi tu baithega”
Finally Varun bike par baitha aur use lekar main waha gaya jaha uska bada bhai
tha….yani ki daru bhatti…lekin ek chiz jo maine gaur ki wo ye ki time bahut speed
se badh raha tha…main apne ghar se sham ko 5 baje nikla tha aur yaha tak mujhe
anyhow 5:30 baje tak pahuch jaana chahiye tha…lekin jab maine bike se utar kar
time dekha toh is samay 8 baj rahe the…ye lagbhag wahi samay tha jab real me
maine Varun ke bhaiya ko suicide karne se roka tha…maine apni ghadi me dobara
nazar mari…seconds ki sui bahut tez ghoom rahi thi aur usi ke hisab se baki sui
bhi….minute ki sui aise ghoom rahi thi jaise wo second ki sui ho aur ghante ki sui
aise jaise wo minute ki sui ho…yaani ki time bahut tezi se aage badh raha tha….aur
mere bike se utar kar daru bhatti tak pahuchne me maine jab time dekha toh 8:30
baj chuke the….bhatti ke andar ahata me Varun ka bada bhai full load tha…yaha
tak ki hume pahchan tak nahi pa raha tha….
“Varun….ja jakar nibbo pani lekar aa…”Varun ke bhai ke bagal me baithkar maine
Varun se kaha
“us-se kya hoga”
“ye tu hamesha itne sawal kyun puchhte rahta hai…ye koyi physics ki class hai kya
? ja jakar nibbo paani ka jugad jama …”Varun ko fatkar lagakar maine uske bade
bhai ki taraf apna rukh kiya“aur bade bhaiya…kaun sa brand liya….”samne rakhi
botal ko uthate hue maine puchha…
“kaun…”halki si aankh kholkar Varun ke bhai ne kaha aur phhir apni aankh band
kar li…
“ what the fuck…arey main hoon….Arman”
“kaun Arman…”abki baar aankh band karke hee Varun ke bhaiya ne jawab diya…
“Varun ko jante ho…”

“Va…va…Varun….Varun , koyi maal hai kya…”
“hadd hai…”
105
“kya hadd hai…”apni aankhe thodi kholkar Varun ke bade bhai ne puchha…jiske
jawab me maine kuch nahi kaha….jiske baad Varun ke bhaiya ne phhir apni
aankhe band kar li aur aankh band kiye hue hee bole…
“tum gaanja peete ho kya…”
“nahi…”maine jawab diya….itne me nibbo pani lekar Varun bhi aa gaya….maine
ishare se Varun ko cool rahne ke liye kaha aur nibbo pani ka glass Varun ke bhaiya
ko thamate hue bola…..
“lo, pahle peg maro…phhir baat karte hai…”
“nahi…bas ho gaya…ab mujhe suicide karne jana hai…tang aa gaya hoon main is
duniya se…”
“suicide…great idea…lekin uske pahle golden peg toh marte jao…”
“thik hai…”bolte hue Varun ke bhaiya ne nibbo pani ka glass uthaya aur ek saans
me pura glass khali kar diya….
“ye toh nibbo pani hai be lawde….jo tune mujhe daru bolkar pila diya…”gusse se
mera collar pakadkar unhone kaha…
“jis tarah ye nibbo pani hai…daru nahi, usi tarah Varun aapka bhai hai…maal
nahi…”apne collar se Varun ke bhaiya ka hath hatakar maine kaha.. “Varun
bhaiya…I mean…Varun ke bhaiya , kya ho gaya hai aap ko…aap toh ekdum
hoshiyar ,tez tarrar ladke the…phhir Engineering ne aapke DNA par aisa kya effect
dala jo ab aap aise ho gaye…”
“Engineering…BC….puri life barbaad kar di engineering ne meri…tumhe pata hai
ek samay main padhne me bahut hoshiyar tha, lekin phhir maine Engineering
karne ki galti ki…jiske baad sab kuch badal gaya. main hindi medium ka student
tha…isliye shuru-shuru me mujhe problem hui…sabse jyada dimag khaya Physics
ne…kya BC ,sodium light se aand-gand experiments karke puri process yaad karna
padta tha. lab tha , lekin waha kiye gaye experiments BC kisliye the aaj tak samajh
nahi aaya. jitna manhoos subject tha us-se kayi jyada manhoos is subject ka
teacher tha. use dekhkar hee padhne-likhne ka mood nahi hota tha…aur mere pure
syllabus me ek bhi aisa interesting chapter nahi tha, jisko padhne ka mann kare.
Pata nahi kis haramkhor ne syllabus set kiya tha, uski maa ka alpha, beta….main
tumhe topics batata hoon…topics kuch aise the… the Fringe
phenomenon…Polarisation….Carnot cycle…otto cycle…lund cycle…choot cycle. ye
sab kya hai lawda…mujhe toh name sun ke hee ulti hoti hai … college me Physics
padhne se acha hota ki main suicide kar leta aur…aur Mere khayal se wo jyada
better rahta… Physics ne meri haalat aise kar di thi ki main jo kuch bhi padhta…wo
sab dimag ke andar toh jata tha lekin kabhi bahar nahi aaya….na class me aur na
hee examps me…sirf padhte jao…padhte jao…apni gaand marwate jao…”
“aapka dimag black hole ban gaya tha kya, jisme sirf incoming thi aur outgoing
bilkul band thi….”
“ jiska nateeza first semester back….second semester back….ispar se job ki tension
alag….kyunki main Engineering college me jaane ke kuch din baad hee ye jaan
gaya tha ki…jobs ki kya conditions hai. Upar se main tha Government college me
aur College walo ko toh jaise humare future ki koyi fikar hee nahi thi….unhe kya
fark padne wala tha ki students padhe ya na padhe…unhe toh barabar salary mil
rahi thi…kya tum yakin karoge ki 60 saal purine Government college me mere hod
ko chhodkar koyi permanent faculty nahi tha...uspar bhi guest teacher aise the ki
un maa ke lawdo se ek question bhi koyi puchh le toh unki dayi-mayi chud jati
thi…aur sectional ki dhamki dekar wo students ko class attend karne ke liye
mazboor kar dete the…ispar bhi yadi koyi placement company college ke name ki
vazah se galti se humare college me aa bhi jati thi toh BC college wale unki koyi
kadra nahi karte the…Private college walo ki tarah humare college walo ko bhi
chahiye ki unke chay paani ka intezam kare..lekin nahi, college walo ka toh apna
106
hee randi rona tha…bolte the ki iska fund kaha se aayega…sale

dalle…madarchod… wo log college ke peon ko placement walo ke paas bhej dete
the…ab bhai, placement walo ki bhi koyi izzat hai. Wo waha bheekh magne toh
aaye nahi hai..jo tum unke sath aisa bartaav karo…isliye jo bhi company humare
college me ek baar aati…next year se wo humare college ki taraf dekh kar thookti
bhi nahi thi…yani ki next year se companies ne aana band kar diya…idhar dusari
taraf mere back pe back lagte gaye….tension me college jana to door ki baat maine
4th semester ke exam tak nahi diye….mujhe itna stress tha ki main fifth semester
me hee suicide kar leta yadi meri life me Anjana nahi aayi hoti toh…pahle wo meri
friend bani aur phhir mere dil ki dhadkan…uski vazah se maine 5th sem se college
aana shuru kiya aur phhir dheere-dheere padhayi me mera interest badha….tab
mujhe samajh aaya ki mujhse kitni badi galti ho gayi hai…maine apni zindagi ke
aham do saal yun hee in madarchodo ke karan tension me barbaad kar diye
the….lekin phhir bhi maine haar nahi mani aur Anjana ke sath-sath padhayi me
bhi interest lene laga….jiski vazah se 7th sem tak mere sirf do hee back the…lekin
BC us 8th semester ne mere growth rate ko wapas neeche dhakel diya….”
“nice… aisa kya hua tha 8th Semester me…”side me rakha Varun ke bhaiya ka peg
chupke se uthakar marte hue maine beech me pucha….
“8th Semester me…8th semester me mujhe pata chala ki Anjana kisi aur launde se
set hai…mujhse toh sirf wo pyar ka natak kar rahi thi aur mere pahle bhi usne
college me do-teen ke sath yahi kiya tha….maine kya-kya nahi kiya tha uske
liye…raat-raat bhar jagkar uske bare me socha karta tha…raat-raat bhar jaagkar
use kaise hasau sirf yahi socha karta tha…raat-raat bhar jaagkar uske liye ppt
taiyar kiya karta tha… uske liye notes ki photo copy karata tha… lekin jab mujhe
pata chala ki Anjana mujhse nahi kisi aur se pyar karti hai toh…maine use kuch
nahi kaha , na toh us-se kuch pucha aur na hee us-se koyi baat ki…din bhar main
sirf apne room me rahta…Anjana ke bare me sochta…uske sath bitaye waqt ko
yaad karke rota…Anjana ke bina bitaya har ek din sadiyo ke barabar lagta
tha…tab mujhe samajh aaya ki pyar me aadmi sirf andha hee nahi balki chodu bhi
ban jata hai..”
“ek din…ek sadi ke barabar…yani ki theory of relativity..”ek aur peg chupke se
marte hue maine kaha
“maine bahut koshish ki Anjana ki mohabbat ko nafrat me badalne ki…lekin main
aisa nahi kar paya…main Anjana se jitni nafrat karne ki koshish karta us-se mujhe
utna hee adhik pyar ho raha tha aur jab wo mere sath nahi thi toh ye pyar din ba
din aur tezi ke sath badhte ja raha tha…8th semester ke ant me mujhe laga ki main
pagal ho jaunga…jis-se bachnne ka sirf ek hee rasta tha…suicide…maine suicide
karne ki koshish bhi ki…maine ek din decide kiya ki main train ke samne aakar
Anjana se…Engineering se…aur is duniya se hamesha ke liye muqt ho
jaunga…isliye maine train ke saamne koodne ka decision liya…lekin aain waqt par
na jaane mere dost kaha se aa gaye aur unhone mujhe bacha liya….”bolte-bolte
Varun ke bhai ne pause mara aur phhir thodi der baad phhir se bolna chalu
kiya“tumhe pata hai is duniya ka sabse lachar vyakti kaun hai…? Is duniya ka
sabse lachar vyakti wo hai jo is duniya se ,is duniya ke logo se nirash hokar marna
chahta hai lekin wo mar nahi pata…aur use bachane wala koyi aur nahi balki isi
duniya ke wo log hote hai…jinse wo beinteha nafrat karta hai….mera matlab…us
shaks se jyada lachar aur kaun ho sakta hai…jo marna toh chahe lekin mar na
paye…aura b main bahut depression me hoon…mujhe ab na toh kisi chiz ki koyi
chah hai aur na hee kisi se milne ki ichchha aur na hee kuch karne ka junoon mere
andar bacha hai… par kabhi-kabhi main sochta hoon ki life kitni haseen hoti yadi
Anjana mere sath hoti…tab shayad mere 8th semester ka ant aise na hota aur na
hee main aisa hota…lekin mera dil tab aur bhi jyada dukhta hai jab mere gharwale
107
meri halat par gaur nahi karte…unhe toh bas laakho kamane wala beta
chahiye…mere sare dost meri situation ko samajhte hai…aas-paas ke sabhi log
mera hausla badhate hai…lekin is mushqil waqt me mere pariwar wale jinki mujhe
sakht zaroorat hai wahi mujhse khafa hai…kya mere gharwalo ko mahsoos nahi
hota…wo dard jo main jhel raha hoon…kya unhe meri halat dikhayi nahi deti…ya
phhir wo sab kuch jaan kar bhi aisa bartaav kar rahe hai…yadi aisa hai toh phhir
mere yaha rahne ka kya fayda…mujhe toh mar jaana chahiye. isiliye aaj main
suicide karunga…aksar mere man me ye khayal aata hai ki bhagwan kyun mujhe
wo sab kuch nahi de deta jo main chahta hoon…jise paane ke liye maine mehnat
ki…phhir main un logo ko dekhta hoon jinke paas wo hai aur tab main samajh jata
hoon wo log…wo chize jinhe main pana chahta tha…wo mere layak hee nahi hai…”
“aisa nahi hai bade bhaiya…ye sab hota hai…sabke sath toh nahi par…hota hai.”
“lekin main khud ko kaise samjhaun ki mere gharwale hee mere khilaf hai…wo
samajh hee nahi rahe meri situation ko…jabki unke aalawa har koyi turant meri
situation samajh jata hai….”
“aapke gharwalo ke aalawa baki sab aapki situation samajh jate hai kyunki
unhone aap me apna paisa aur samay invest nahi kiya…aap ek kaam kariye…aap
apne dost ya un logo ke paas jayiye jo aapse sahanubhuti dikhate hai aur unse wo
sab karne ko kahiye jo aapke maa-baap ne aapke liye kiya hai…phhir aap boliye
unki us sari mehnat ko aapne college me sirf ek ladki ke chakkar me barbaad kar
diya aur phhir unka reaction dekhiye…kya hoga ? abki baar unka reaction
sahanubhuti wala nahi balki pichhwade me laat marne wala hoga…ye jo aapke
dost hai ya phhir aapse free ki sahanubhuti dikhane wale log hai…unhone aapke
liye wo sab kuch nahi kiya…jo aapke ma baap ne kiya hai…isliye in tuchche logo se
apne ma-baap ki tulna mat kijiye…..aap ghar jao…competitive exams ki taiyari
karo aur exam clear karke apni life track par le aao…this is the best you can
do…baki aap jaha suicide karne jaane wale ho…waha aaj police ki patrolling chal
rahi hai…isliye aaj suicide karne mat jana, warna khamkha police case banega….
aur…”
Chapter-13 : The Detachment
Varun ke bade bhaiya se baat karte waqt maine socha ki isme se toh 50 % mere
sath bhi hua hai…bas mere kabhi back nahi lage…. mujhe pahle se hee pata tha ki
college me mujhe kya karna hai aur kya nahi karna hai… lekin phhir bhi maine wo
kiya..jo mujhe nahi karna chahiye tha.upar se main apna hee wo rule follow nahi
kar raha hoon jise follow karne ki salah maine abhi-abhi Varun ke bhai ko di
thi…jaise ke apne maa-baap ki tulna logo se mat karo…vagerah-vagerah aur is
tarah ek baar phhir main khud hee apne banaye rule ko follow nahi kar raha tha…
Main abhi ye sab bhatti me baithkar soch hee raha tha ki mere side me baitha
Varun mujhe pakad kar hilane laga aur jor-jor se mera name pukarne laga….
“Arman….Arman…abey…kaha kho gaya..”
“mujhe kyun pakad ke hila raha hai…hilana hai toh apne bhai ka hila…mera
matlab apne bhai ko hila”
“bhai ko hilau…tu hai kaha…”
“dekh Varun… jab main kuch achchhi baate kar raha hota hoon toh tu mujhe
disturb mat kiya kar , warna ekat din mood kharab hua toh pel-pal dunga …tujhe
108
zara bhi andaza hai ki kitna samay aur mehnat lagti hai…aise dialogues sochne
me…ab tu mujhe hilana band kar warna main wapas jate samay aaj phhir tujhe
bike se gira dunga….”
“tu bol kya raha hai…meri toh kuch samajh me nahi aa raha…par tu ab hosh me aa
…wo dekh Nisha aa gayi hai and she is looking damn hot and sexy…”
“Nisha ? ”
Maine apne aaju-baju dekha…main ab bhi daru bhatti me hee tha…par is waqt na
toh waha Varun tha aur na hee uska bhai…infact is waqt puri bhatti me koyi nahi
tha..sab achanak se gayab ho gaye the…jis-se mere mann me aaya ki main do-char
botar daru chura kar bhag jaun… lekin phhir maine apne samne wali deewar ko
dekha toh paya ki uska shape aur size bahut jaldi jaldi badal raha tha…kabhi laal
toh kabhi neela…aur thodi der ke baad ye parivartan charo taraf hone laga…ab
mere samne wo table nahi thi jisme maine apne liye ek aur peg bana kar rakha hua
tha…
“ye toh mera ghar hai…aur main balcony me kyun khada hoon…main toh thodi der
pahle Varun ke sath daru bhatti me tha…aur ye aawaz kaisi hai”
Aur phhir pahle ki tarah mere sar ko ek jor ka jhatka laga lekin abki baar wala
jhatka itna tez tha ki mere body ke sare purje hil gaye aur main wahi balcony me
apna sar pakad kar baith gaya
“tu bol kya raha hai…meri toh kuch samajh me nahi aa raha…par tu ab hosh me aa
…wo dekh Nisha aa gayi hai and she is looking damn hot…”Varun ki aawaz mere
kano me gunji…
“lagta hai jyada din zinda nahi rahunga main…yahi haal raha toh brain
hemorrhage pakka hai…”
“kya bola…”
“tu rahne de Varun ,ye sab Psychological baate hai…teri samajh me nahi
aayegi…tu bas party enjoy kar…”bolte hue maine dheere-dheere apni aankh kholi
aur mujhe mere samne thik 90° ke angle par mujhe Nisha dikhayi di…nahi exact
90° pe nahi…wo mujhse 90..89…88..87 …correct. wo mujhe thik 87° par dikhi…jise
dekhkar mere sar ka dard dheere-dheere kam hone laga
“tumne apna sar kyun pakad rakha hai”mere paas aakar Nisha puchhi
“wo main, tumhe compliment de raha hoon…tum itni jyada khoobsurat lag rahi ho
ki maine apna sar pakad liya…”
“say…you love me”
“ 80 % ”

109
“100 % bolo na…”
“pagal hai kya…aise me efficiency 1 ho jayegi aur ye physics ke according mumkin

nahi hai matlab main aisa koyi kaam nahi karta jo physics ke khilaf ho….my love
for physics is forever”
“ok… ”
.
“par kuch bhi ho…aaj tum kamal lag rahi ho..matlab kitna taiyar hokar aayi
ho…itna makeup…kaise kar leti ho ye sab…”Nisha ke chehre par aaye baal ko
peeche karte hue maine uske gaal ko pinch kiya… “ye sab real hai…”
“real hai ? matlab ? tumhe shaq hai kya ki tum sapna dekh rahe ho…hmm ? aur
yadi tumhe sahq bhi hai toh tumhe khud ko pinch karna chahiye tha…naa ki
mujhe”
“main mahan…mera sab kuch mahan. Anyway aaj tera mujhse shadi karne ka toh
irada nahi…jo itna saj sawar ke aayi hai..”
“kaha taiyar hokar aayi hoon…simple hee toh hoon…”
“toh ho jaye phhir…”
“kya…”
“wahi…”
“Noooooo…”
“kya yar…tu kahe toh room bhi khali hai ek…matlab maine ek aur flat book kar
rakha hai River view me…”
“maine kaha na nahi….”
“aakhiri bar humne kab kiya tha…”
“parso raat me…”
“main kiss ki baat nahi kar raha hoon…arey wo…jisme hum dono bahut hilte hai”
“main kya ab ye yaad rakhungi ki humne last time kab kiya tha ”thoda naraz hote
hue Nisha boli
“wahi toh…tujhe yaad bhi nahi ki aakhiri baar humne sex kab kiya tha…isiliye
aajkal humare beech aaye din ladayi hoti hai…kyunki hum dono aajkal thik se
connect nahi ho pa rahe hai…meri baat maan…chal mere sath…maine ek aur flat
book kar rakha hai…chal sex karte hai…”
“Arman…humare beech sex na hone ki vazah se ladayi nahi ho rahi…balki ladayi

hone ki vazah se sex nahi ho raha…”

110
“baat toh wahi hai yar…mera matlab energy koyi si bhi ho,kya fark padta
hai..uska unit toh joule hee rahega na…I mean lund choot me dalo ya phhir choot
lund me, chudna toh choot ko hee hai na”
“tumne pura mood off kar diya…”

“mood off ho gaya ? mera ek dost hai Arun…wo aksar mera mood off hone par
mujhse kahta tha ki ja…mutth mar ke aa…lekin tujhe toh main wo bhi nahi kah
sakta…”
“Arman…..this is disgusting ”
“toh thik hai ungali kar le…”kahte hue main has pada aur Nisha ki tone nikalte hue
bola “Arman….this is disgusting ”
“tum aisa kyun karte ho…kya tumhe achchha lagta hai ye sab karke…ya sukoon
milta hai…”
“actually meri ek philosophy hai ki jo chize tumhe buri lagti hai unka Mazak
banana shuru kar do…phhir wo thoda kam buri lagti hai…”
Ye sunkar Nisha kuch nahi boli aur chup chap apne friends ke paas chali gayi…aur
main khud ko koste hue balcony ki taraf mud gaya….
Varun mera khas dost tha…mujhe uski help karni chahiye thi…is waqt mujhe uske
sath rahna chahiye tha…lekin main tha ki balcony me hee khada hokar chup chap
andar ho rahe ek-ek chiz ko dekh raha tha…maine school life me friendynamics ka
ek law banaya tha…jiske according mujhe Sonam ki respect karni chahiye thi…thik
usi tarah jis tarah main apni bahan ki karta…yadi wo hoti toh…lekin pichhale
kuch dino se main kayi baar apne khud ke law ko hee tod chuka tha aur Sonam ki
insult kar chuka tha….yani ki Thermodynamics ke first law ki tarah
Friendyanmics ke is law ki bhi kuch limitations thi….yani ki ab samay aa gaya tha
jab main friendyamics ka second law parit karu…aur isiliye..bas isiliye maine
balcony me khade hokar friendynamic ka second law banaya .jo ki first law se
milta julta tha ya phhir kahe ki first law ka modified version tha….
“According to second law of friendynamics… at standard temperatre &

pressure(STP), your friend’s girlfriend is equal to your sister and you must have to
respect and love her(non-in**st) unless you get frustrated with her…after that you
can even rape her…….….but from mouth….”
“wow…kyun hoon main itna talented…let’s take a bow ”
Update-39
Quote:
“According to second law of friendynamics… at standard temperatre &
pressure(STP), your friend’s girlfriend is equal to your sister and you must have to
respect and love her(non-in**st) unless you become fucking frustrated…after that
you can even rape her…….….but from mouth….”
“wow…kyun hoon main itna talented… let’s take a bow ”
Mere dwara friendynamic ka second law banane tak Varun aur Sonam ki is party
me ab bahut jyada log aa chuke the aur main bhi full taiyar hokar abhi bahar hee
aaya tha…maine dekha ki party me lagbhag wo sabhi log mauzood the jinhe main
janta tha…yani ki David…Shipra…Sonam…Nisha aur Varun ke kuch dost jo ki ek-
111
do baar flat me aaye the…kahne ko toh main bahut logo ko janta tha lekin phhir
bhi main bahut akela mahsoos kar raha tha aur mujhe rah-rah kar mere college ki
farewell party yaad aa rahi thi…jisme Rajshri Pandey ne meri thali se rasgulla
nikal kar kha liya tha…farewell party ko yaad karne se mera mann kiya ki
lawda,abhich anchoring kar maru, jaisa ki maine apne farewell party me kiya tha,
jisme meri welcome speech kuch aisi thi….
Quote:
"Gentlemen and gentlewomen....tum log soch rahe hoge ki main ab ek shaleen
bhara, swachh bhashad prastut karunga...jisme main tum logo ka aabhar vyakt
karunga ki aap log yaha aaye, isliye dhanyavaad....yadi tum sab aisa sochate ho to
,bhool jao, kyunki main aisa kuch bhi nahi bolne wala aur main kahe tum ko logo
thanks bolu be....ek to free ka khana khaoge, seetiya maroge, langar dance karke
pure karyakram ki aisi-taisi karoge...upar se tum sab ye apeksha rakhte ho ki
main tum logo ka shukriya ada karu....ladkiyo ka to khair main bahut aadar karta
hoon isliye sabke saamne unhe kuchh nahi bolunga ,lekin ladko...tum log apna
kaan khol kar sun lo aur yadi jaroorat ho to kuch aur bhi khol kar sun sakte
ho...lekin dhyan se sunna....tum me se bahut aise honge, jo khud ko bahut bada
cool dude, funny samajhte hai ,jo programme ke beech-beech me muh me dono
hath rakhkar chillate hai, comments pass karte hai, un logo ne yadi aisa kuchh bhi
kiya...to beta, mujhe jaha dikhoge ,wahi par marunga aur langar dance to bilkul
hee ban hai...i hate langar dance. Ye aaj ke function ke terms & conditions hai ,
yadi manzoor ho toh i agree ka button daba kar join kar lo...warna khisak
lo....nahi to main baal pakad kar ghaseetate-ghaseetate le jaunga....."
Quote:
"lagta hai, tum logo ne dil pe liya...main to aise hee mazak kar raha tha, dar-asal
ye script me tha....aur mujhe kaha gaya tha ki main ekdum tevar me tum log ko
dhamkaun....to kaisi lagi meri acting"
Mere mann me aaya ki farewell party wali speech main yaha bhi thok du…lekin
phhir jab waha mauzood logo ko dekha toh laga ki rahne deta hoon…waise
anchoring se yaad aaya ki kaise Esha farewell ke din mujhse sex karne ko utaru ho
gayi thi…kya maal thi..us-se toh main left side se pyar karta tha…sala
Gautam…madarchod…..madarchod nahi Maadharchod… thoda vazandar gali…
“hey bro…”mere college farewell ki yaadon me khatas dalte hue mere hee umra ke
ek ladke ne mujhse hath milaya aur mujhse jabarpeli ka gale lagte hue bola
“bro…mera name Vivek hai…yo…main medical shop chalata hoon…meri dukaan

tumne dekhi hogi yahi colony se thodi door me hai...”
“ main faltu ki chizo par dhyan nahi deta”
“yo bro…par meri medical shop se Sanjeevani clinic bhi attached hai…jaha mere
bade bhai doctor hai…yo..”
“toh tu mujhe kyun irritate kar raha hai ye sab bata ke…”khisyate hue main bola…
“aisi baat nahi hai bro…”
“dekh be… yadi tune ek aur baar…. Bro…yo bro…kaha toh main wo samne wali
beer ki botal lunga aur use tere pichhwade me dalkar…us botal me ek laat

112
kheechkar marunga…tu ja na apna kaam kar…ek toh waise hee mera sar ghoom
raha hai…upar se tu apni aisi taisi kara raha hai…”
“bro…tumhara sar ghoom raha hai…”kahkar usne turant apni jeb me hath dala
aur ek tablet mujhe dekar bola “isko kha lo…”
Maine ek baar usko upar se neeche dekha aur socha ki iska kya karu…is-se
chhutkara kaise paun…iske muh me mukka maar du…ya iske khopdi me apni
khopdi de maru ya phhir ise lund fek ke maru….lekin phhir mujhe ek aur raasta
soojha aur maine chup chap uski tablet li aur use badi shaleenta ke sath‘excuse me’
bolkar waha se khisak liya…
“sala kya ajeeb chipku tha…bro…yo bro…bolkar dimag ka dhokla bana diya…ek
aur minute uske sath rahta toh dimag ki nashe fat jati….kaise-kaise log hai is
duniya me…I hate everyone”
.
“Arman……idhar aa”
“ab kaun hai be…”palatkar maine dekha… “ye toh Varun hai…par ye mujhe kyun
bula raha hai…”
“aana..champagne beer kholni hai”
“toh khol lena…mujhe kyun bula raha hai…”
Jiske baad Varun ne mujhe ghoor kar dekha aur na chahte hue bhi mujhe waha
jaana pada…waha is samay Varun ke paas kuch khas hee log the…baki sab thoda
door khade hokar champagne khulne ka intezar kar rahe the…Nisha, Shipra…
Sonam ke bagal me khadi thi aur main ,Varun ke bagal me khada tha, mujhe nahi
maloom ki kyun par mujhe is samay bahut insult wali feeling aa rahi thi…lekin
tabhi waha wo medical shop wala launda aa gaya…jisne thodi der pahle..bro…bro
karke mera dimag kha liya tha…
“hey bro…”mujhe kohni markar wo bola
“main teri gand mar lunga yadi tune mujhe dobara touch bhi kiya toh…ya phhir
mujhse baat bhi ki toh…lawda, bahut der se bardasht kar raha hoon tujhe…ab yadi
tune ek aur shabd bhi bola toh teri gand me danda dalkar 1000 R.P.M. ki speed se
danda ghumaunga…”
“Arman ,ye kya bol raha hai tu…”dheere-dheere apna daant peeste hue Varun bola
“Vivek dost hai mera…tu us-se aise baat nahi kar sakta…”
“toh usko bol ki mujhse baat hee na kare…simple”
“Vivek ,tu abhi chup rah…main baad me tujhse milta hoon…”

113
“ok…Varun bro…”bolkar Vivek waha se door hat gaya aur Vivek ke waha se jaane
ke baad Varun ne Sonam ke sath milkar champagne beer kholi….sale gay
.
champagne khulne ke ek ghante ke baad hee waha mauzood har shaks chala gaya
tha…siway kuch logo ko chhodkar….jo shayad Sonam…Nisha…Shipra aur David
the…shayad isiliye main is waqt flat ke andar nahi balki chhat par daru aur beer ki
botal lekar baitha hua tha aur andar chal rahe hasi Mazak se main beech-beech me
andaza laga raha tha ki…andar kaun-kaun hai….Chhat par is samay pel ke
andhera tha aur kyunki mujhe andhera bahut pasand tha isliye main aksar raat ko
daru yahi piya karta tha…jiske karan meri assumption itni strong ho gayi thi ki
main andhere me bhi peg bana liya karta tha….
“kya be,Arman…teri koyi izzat-vizzat hai ki nahi…Varun ne itna bada faisla le liya
aur tujhe bataya tak nahi…tu kahe toh pel du sale ko…”peg banate hue maine khud
se pucha aur peg banane ke baad khud ko jawab dete hue bola…
“usne bataya tha mujhe…par mujhe yaad hee nahi raha…main toh yahi soch raha
tha ki meri naukri lagne ki khushi me party di ja rahi hai…”
“offer ab bhi khula hai…tu kahe toh pel du…”
“rahne de…wo toh main bhi kar sakta hoon…”
“waise ek baat bata…ye David kab se Varun ka itna acha dost ban gaya…jo ab tak
tere flat me ruka hua hai…kahi Varun aur David gay toh nahi hai…jaise tu aur
Arun the…”
“tu in logo ki tulna Arun se kar raha hai…? ”
“sorry...3.0 , Arun was classy…lekin tujhe kya hua..tere samne David , Nisha se
ishq ladata hai..dinner me bulakar teri insult karta hai…matlab insult karne ki
koshish karta hai aur tu sirf use jaane deta hai…kaha gaya wo Arman…jisne jo
hoga dekha jayega bolkar collector ke launde tak ko pel diya tha…ye jante hue bhi
ki phhir baad me uski pelayi hogi…kaha gaya wo Arman…jisne Gautam ko hostel
me patak-patak ke kutto ki tarah choda tha…ye jante hue bhi ki Gautam shahar ke
sabse bade gunde ka beta tha… tu thoda soch aur phhir mujhe jawab de ki kya ab
tujhe khud par sharam nahi aati ki tu kya tha aur ab kya ban gaya hai…”
“wo…wo main nahi tha…matlab main tha..lekin ab main wo nahi raha…pichhale

ek saal ne mujhe bahut badal diya hai…tum toh lawda kand karke nikal
liye…jhelna mujhe pada…wo toh bhala ho ki mujhe Physics me interest tha,isliye
main in sabse nikal gaya…warna main aaj khud suicide kar chuka hota…maine
pichhale ek saal me physics ki kayi books padhi…physics ke siddhanto ko apne life
ke sath interpetate kiya…tab main samjha ki Physics se bada is duniya me koyi
nahi….i mean the deeper you go, the deeper it becomes. aur rahi baat meri toh
maine wo zindagi jee hai jiske bare me tu soch bhi nahi sakta… tune toh pel ke
ayyashi mari aur chala gaya lekin uska anjaam mujhe jhelna pada ”
“main chala gaya…? Main ab bhi yahi hoon..aur tu kahe toh tujhe iska proof bhi
dikha sakta hoon…”

114
“dikha proof…”
“phhir kamar kas le bidu…par starting tu karna…baki main sambhal lunga…toh

chale..”
“chal…”bolkar maine aakhiri peg mara aur hilte-dulte hue khada hua….
“chalo phhir…aaj in sabki pond marte hai…”
Pahle toh maine socha ki normal tarike se normal raaste se yaani ki seehiyo se
neeche jaun…lekin phhir maine plan badal diya aur chhat se latak kar seedhe
balcony me kooda..jiske karan waha bahut tez aawaz hui aur room me mauzood
har ek shaks us aawaz se thodi der ke liye kanp gaya…lekin jab un logo ne mujhe
dekha toh hasne lage…
“jyada pee li hai kya be…”mere balcony me koodne ke baad David ne mujhse
kaha…
“sorry…David Sir…”
Iske baad maine kuch nahi kaha aur chup chap wahi unke paas me jakar baith
gaya…maine waha baithe har ek shaks ka co-ordinate apne dimag me set kiya
…Sonam as expected…Varun ka hath pakad kar baithi hui thi aur Nisha ,David ke
bagal me thi…baki sab toh shant the lekin David politics ke bare me apna gyan
chod raha tha…jaise ki 1947 ke pahle kya-kya hua tha…aur isi dauran wo Gandhi ji
ki pelam-pel burayi karne laga…jiske baad main waha se utha aur fridge me se ek
beer nikal kar wapas waha aaya jaha sablog baithe hue the….maine muh se beer
ka dhakkan khola aur dhakkan seedhe David ke ke upar muh se hee fek diya….jiske
baad waha mauzood sabhi log mujhe ghoor kar dekhne lage…yaha tak ki Varun
aur Nisha bhi….lekin maine un sabko ignore kiya aur wahi khade hokar beer peene
lag gaya aur phhir beer ka ek ghoot muh me bharkar Varun ke upar pichkari
marte hue bola….
“tum jaise log jo Gandhi ji ki burayi karte hai, wo char kaudi ke log hote hai aur do
kaudi ki baate karte hai…tujhe pata bhi hai ki tu kiski burayi kar raha
hai…Mahatma Gandhi ki…mana ki unse kuch galtiya hui…lekin wo toh sabhi se
hoti hai…Gandhi ji ko aur unke motives ko samjho… na ki is Shipra ki tarah ratta
maro…sale, Madarchodo…”
“teri himmat kaise hui…mujh par thookne ki…you motherfucker”aakrosh me

aakar khada hote hue David cheekha aur jaise hee wo khada hua maine beer ki
botal uske sar me fod di….
“neeche baith…Maaadharchod….bahut din se tujhe dekh raha hoon,lawda… main

kuch bolta nahi iska matlab ye nahi ki main kuch janta nahi…kyunki main kuch
bolne ke bajay kuch karne me yakin rakhta hoon ”ye kahkar maine ek mukka
kaskar David ke pet me mara, jiske baad wo apna pet pakad kar wahi baith
gaya….aur dard se rone laga….
Ye David ka haal tha…lekin waha mauzood baki logo ka haal David se bhi bura ho
chala tha…Shipra toh dar ke mare Nisha ke peeche chhup gayi thi…baki bache teen
115
log…Varun ,Sonam aur Nisha…wo is waqt mujhse dar bhi rahe the aur mujhe
ghoor bhi rahe the…
“Armaaaaann…what the hell is this…”mujhe jor se dhakka dekar Nisha cheekhi…
“main soch hee raha tha ki ab kiska number lagau…par tune mera kaam aasan kar
diya…”Nisha ki taraf badhte hue main muskuraya…lekin main Nisha ke aur karib
jata…uske pahle hee Varun ne mujhe pakad liya….
“Arman…tu is waqt hosh me nahi hai…tu chal mere sath…aur Sonam tum David ko
sambhalo…uske sar se khoon nikal raha hai…”
“Sonam, yadi tune David ko chhua bhi toh main na teri gand maar dunga…salo
Shri Arman ki bezzati karte ho…aaj tumlog ko apna real version dikhata
hoon…Varun tu hat be..”
“Arman…Sonam meri girlfriend hai…tu us-se aise baat nahi kar sakta”
“teri girlfriend hai toh kya…tu us-se mere sar me mootwayega…Sonam ko chhod
yadi tune bhi David ki koyi help ki toh main tere sath bhi wahi karunga…”
“Nisha…wo us almirah me first aid ka box hai…tum David ki help karo…main

Arman ko sambhalta hoon….”bolkar Varun ne mujhe peeche se pakda aur pakad
kar waha se door le jaane laga…
“tu mujhe sambhalega…chhod mujhe…abey chhod…teri toh…chhod de, main bol

raha hoon ki mujhe chhod de…ye sala…Varun me mujhse jyada dum kabse aa
gaya…main khud ko chhuda hee nahi pa raha…”khud ko Varun ke changul se
chhudane ki koshish karte hue main badbadaya…
Isi beech Nisha almirah se first aid ka box nikal layi aur dard se karahte David ke
paas pahuchi…
“iski maa ka…Varun chhod mujhe… aaj is rakhail ko bhi thik karta hoon.. bahut
dimag khati hai ye… BC ne pagal kar diya hai ye puchh-puchh ke ki main kaisi dikh
rahi hoon… meri dress kaisi hai… mera hairband kaisa hai… meri sandel kaisi
hai.… phhir mujhe apne aur David ki kahani sunayegi… mere same kisi aur ki
taarif karegi… yadi itna hee pasand hai tujhe David toh ,ja usi ka lund le le… phhir
mere paas kyun aati hai… Sali rakhail aur Varun, tu mujhe chhodega ki nahi be”
“Arman…nahi…tu pagal ho gaya hai abhi…”
“abhi toh main thik hua hoon…tu mujhe chhodega ya nahi”
“nahi…”
“le phhir…”
Maine apna sharir aage ki taraf karke kisi spring ke mafiq pel ke potential energy
store ki aur phhir puri taqat jhok di Varun ko peeche dhakelne me…jiska nateeza
ye hua ki hum dono ki peechhe deewar se jordar takkar hui…Varun ke aage rahne
ke karan main toh phhir bhi thik tha…lekin Varun…uska sar peeche ki deewar se ja
116
takraya aur wo bhi David ki tarah dharashahi ho gaya….jiske baad main utha aur
Varun ke sar se khoon nikalta dekh bola…
“yahi hota hai Sher aur uske shikar ke beech me ungali karne se…ab pada rah aise
hee… 8th Semester ki puri kahani sunne ke baad bhi tu mere beech me aaya…tune
kya socha tha ki Arman teri baat maan jayega… sale aukat me rah aur bhool mat
ki kya haisiyat thi teri mere saamne…bosdiwale ”
“tumhari himmat kaise hui…”tarrate hue Sonam mere paas aayi aur mujhe marne
ke liye apna hath uthane hee wali thi ki maine uska hath pakda aur uthakar Varun
ki taraf fek diya….
“ab ye mujhe chodna sikhayenge… Friendynamic ke law ne mere hath baandh

rakhe hai warna main tujhe achchhe se batata ki meri himmat kaise hui… randi
Sali… paise lekar lund choosne wali… tujhse toh main baad me niptunga.. tu rook
do minute abhi”
Sonam ko fekne ke baad maine flat ka room andar se lock karke chabhi apne jeb me
dal li aur sabka mobile chheenkar balcony me fek diya .yaha tak ki apna bhi…pata
nahi kyun par maine apna mobile bhi balcony me fek diya. Shayad flow-flow me
fek diya hoga…anyway uske baad maine balcony ke gate ko bhi lock kiya aur
chabhi apne jeb me dal li….yani ki ab mere kaand karne ki ideal situations thi . bole
toh no external disturbance….mere bistar par apna pet pakad kar rote hue David
ka maine pair pakda aur ghaseet kar neeche patak diya aur ek laat use marte hue
bola
“kaise be…ab bol…”
“sorry bhai…”hath jodkar vinti karte hue David mere samne gidgidane laga
“kya sorry be…lawde” ek aur laat use pelte hue maine kaha
“sorry…bhai…galti ho gayi mujhse…”
“kyun hoon main itna dayawan…”David ko continueosly marte hue maine kaha
“mahan…hone ka… yahi…ek….nuksan…hai… ki main… logo ko… jaan se…nahi…
maar pata”
.
David ko bharpet marne ke baad maine use wahi chhoda aur Nisha ki taraf badha
aur sabse pahle uska baal pakad kar jabaran uske honth par kiss kiya aur phhir
bola….
“tum ladkiya jitni bholi ban-ne ka natak karti ho utni tum hoti nahi….tujhe kya
lagta hai ki mujhe tere bare me kuch nahi maloom…tujh jaisi ladkiya kisi ek ki
nahi ho sakti…college me tune kisi aur se marwayi ,phhir mujhse aur ab David
se….”
“David sirf mera dost hai…”ruwasi hokar cheekhte hue Nisha boli….

117
“yahi bol-bol kar tum ladkiyo ne 90 % laundo ko chutiya bana rakha hai…tu toh
mujhse baat karne ke layak hee nahi hai…isliye main tujhse toh baat hee nahi
karunga….Sonam…tu kidhar hai... Sali chhinar… paise lekar lund chusne wali..”
“Arman tu use kuch nahi bolega…warna ab main bhi shant nahi rahunga…
”deewar ke sahare khade hokar Varun ne kaha
“ Sonam tu wahi ladki hai na…jo paiso ke liye blow job deti hai…tujhe kya lagta hai
ki mujhe tere bare me kuch nahi maloom”
“tu ye kya bol raha hai Arman…”
“mujhe chutiya mat bana Varun…maine Sonam ko tujhse bolte hue suna hai ki
yadi tu use diamond ring gift karega toh wo tujhe blow job degi…yani ki tera
lawda chusegi… Varun, call recordings could be noxious or even deadly. ”
Ek minute….ye maine kaha…kya sach me maine aisa kaha….ya ye sirf mera vaham
hai ki maine aisa kaha….kya ho yadi main kuch der baad khud ko kahi sota hua
paun…ya phhir ye bhi toh ho sakta hai ki main ab bhi apne flat ki chhat par baitha
daru pee raha hoon aur jyada peene ke karan maine ye story apne aap bana li
ho…?kyunki fake story banana me main mahir hoon. Kahi aisa toh nahi ki main
koyi sapna dekh raha hoon ya phhir Sharda Vihar ki chair par baithkar main time
travel kar raha hoon…afterall maine past toh kayi baar ghoom liya hai aur yadi
brain ke through past me jaana possible hai toh phhir future me kyun nahi…..? par
yaha ek sawal ya phhir kahe ki sabse aham sawal jo mere saamne aata hai wo ye
ki kahi 8th Semester ki jo kahani maine Varun ko sunayi thi yadi uska koyi wazood
hee na ho toh ? kya ho agar main kabhi college gaya hee na hoon toh ? kahi
mujhpar koyi experiment toh nahi chal raha…..
Yani ki kayi sambhavnaye…mere dimag ko jodti hai un sabhi ghatnao se jo sach
bhi ho sakti hai aur jhooth bhi…aur ab mujhe ek baar phhir se yahi lagne laga tha
jaise ki mera present mera past hai aur past….future…..confused ? well me too
baby…but I’m enjoying it now . because it’s better to enjoy rather than be confused
all the time.
.
“tumne mujhe samajh kya rakha hai….you son of a bitch…”
ek bahut tez aawaz ne mujhe present me wapas la patka…ya kahe past me ya phhir
future me….par us aawaz ne mujhe wahi la patka jaha se maine scene ko adhoora
chhoda tha…yani ki Nisha…Sonam…Shipra….Varun…..David aur main ab bhi ek
kamre me band the jiski chabhi mere jeb me thi……
“tumne mujhe samajh kya rakha hai….you son of a bitch…”wo ladki phhir se
cheekhi aur abki baar itna jor se cheekhi ki mere andar mauzood har ek chiz kanp
uthi… mera dil, mera dimag, mere hath-pair… kidney…liver… , mera lund . sab
kuch… sab kuch matlab sab kuch.
“ye BC itna kyun cheekh rahi hai…kya isne mujhe bahra samajh rakha hai…oh
sorry…yaad aaya ye toh gusse se cheekh rahi hai…”
“tumhara name Sonam hai na ? jo diamonds ke badle blow job deti hai…”

118
“Arman bahut ho gaya ab…”mere paas aakar mera collar pakad kar Varun ne
kaha… “mere ahsaan mat bhool…mat bhool ki pichhale ek saal se jo tu ye ayyashi
kar raha hai na…wo sab meri badaulat hee kar raha hai…bhool mat ki yadi main
nahi hota toh tu kahi bheekh mang raha hota … meri achchhayi ne mujhe namra
rahna sikhaya hai lekin iska matlab ye nahi ki main tujhe koyi jawab nahi de
sakta…”
“collar se hath hata be…”Varun ko ek mukka markar door dhakelte hue maine
kaha“kaun se ahsaan be…tu pichhale ek saal se mujh par koyi ahsaan nahi kar
raha tha…balki mere ahsaan ko utar raha tha…bhool gaya kaise School life me
mathematics ke har dusare sawal me teri fat jati thi…jiski baad tu mere paas bhag
kar aa jata tha…bhool gaya…kaise meri vazah se Reema tujhse pati thi aur ye sab
ko chhod bhi diya jaye….toh yaad dila du ki jab teri behan tere dost ke sath tere
ghar me pakdi gayi thi tab maine yani ki Shri Arman ne pure school ke saamne us
launde ko mara tha aur phhir pure school ke saamne main maar bhi khaya
tha….chal le de ke is mamle ko bhi hata…lekin us ahsaan ke bare me tu kya bolega
jo maine tujh par nahi balki tere pure khandan par kiya tha…”
“kaun sa ahsaan…”
“kaun sa ahsaan ? ek minute…”David ke paas jaakar maine ek jhapad David ko

mara aur us-se puchha “yaad dila be…kaun sa ahsaan”
“mujhe kaise maloom hoga…”chillate hue David ne turant jawab diya
“Shri Arman se tez aawaz me baat karta hai…teri toh…”ek aur mukka David ke pet
me marte hue main peeche palta aur Varun ko dekhkar kaha “wo ahsaan..jab tera
bhai tum logo se tang aakar suicide karne chala tha…tab use kisne bachaya
tha…bhool gaya kya ? abey maine jitney ahsaan tujh par kiye hai uska yadi main
10 % bhi kisi aur par karta toh wo zindagi bhar mera lund dhokar peeta …aur tu
toh mera dost tha…mera khas dost… par tune toh Sonam ke chakkar me mera
collar pakad liya… mujhe tum sabse nafrat hai… bosdiwalo… tum sabse ”
Bolte hue main ruka aur phhir jeb se room ki chabhi nikal kar gate khola…main ab
samajh gaya tha ki aaj yaha jo kuch bhi hua hai uske baad Varun mere sath nahi
rahega…Varun kya nahi rahega…main khud uske sath nahi rahunga….i…i…just
hate everyone…maine almirah se apna bag nikala jo ki maine pahle se pack karke
rakha hua tha aur waha se jaane laga….
“Arman…toh ye sab tune pahle se plan karke rakha tha…ye sab kuch…isiliye tune
apna bag pahle se pack karke rakha tha…main toh ab tak yahi soch raha tha ki ye
sab kuch jo yaha ho raha hai , jo tu kar raha hai….wo sab kuch tere jyada sharab
peene ki vazah se ho raha hai….”
“aur nahi toh kya…tum logo ne mujhe daru peekar bhokne wala kutta samajh
rakha hai kya…tum log mere baare me jo sochte ho wo toh sirf meri beginning
hai… meri ending ka toh tum log andaza tak nahi laga sakte… main Physics ki
tarah hoon… The Greatest… The Biggest… and The Deepest ”kandhe me bag
taangte hue main bola “ Remember Varun…maine kya kaha tha ki…mere sorry
bolne ka matlab ye nahi hota ki main apne kiye par sharminda hoon... balki iska
matlab ye hota hai ki main tumhe aur bhi sharminda karunga….ye jante hue bhi
119
tune mujhse Sonam ko sorry bulwaya…galti meri nahi thi…galti actual me tum sab
ki thi jo mere muh se sorry sunne ke liye itne betaab the…Goodbye and take
care……lawdo ”
“par tu jayega kaha….”
“itni fikar hoti toh mujhe apne ahsaan nahi ginata tu aur na hee is do take ki ladki
ke chakkar me mera collar pakadta…ab jab sab preplanned hai toh rahne ka bhi
kahi jugad kiya hoga maine…bas abhi mujhe yaad nahi hai…lekin jab yaad
karunga toh yaad aa jayega…
Aasmano ke falaq par kuch rang aaj bhi baki hai….waisich apun ke dil ke bhi kuch
Armaan baki hai…sorry it’s A-R-M-A-N…. jo main pure karne ja raha hoon ”
.
Itna bolkar main waha se chal diya…Kitna acha hota yadi ye sab nahi hua hota
toh…yani ki yadi Nisha mere sath raat me bahar jaane ke liye taiyar ho jati ya
phhir Varun party me David ko invite nahi karta toh mujhe nahi lagta ki ye sab
kuch hota…ya phhir main chhat par jakar daru ke dhada-dhad peg nahi marta toh
na hee main khud se baat karta aur na hee khud ko jo kuch bhi hua,wo sab karne
ke liye motivate karta. Lekin ye hua tha aur bahut jor-shor se hua tha…lekin is
waqt main problem ye nahi thi…is waqt jo main problem thi wo ye ki main itni raat
me jaun kaha...? waha toh bahut akad kar kuch bhi bol diya lekin…mujhe jaana
kaha hai…
“mera bag pahle se aise pack tha…jaise meri kahi jaane ki planning ho…Varun ne
sahi kaha tha ki wo sab kuch jo maine thodi dere pahle kiya tha…wo sab mera plan
tha…na ki mera daru peekar bahak jaana …yani ki jo kuch bhi aaj thodi der pahle
hua…wo hona hee tha…par jab ye mera plan tha toh maine kahi toh raat guzarne
ka intezaam kiya hoga…kisi hotel me..? ya kisi ke dost ke yaha ? ya kisi
dharamshala me ?”
Ye janne ke liye maine apne sare jeb check kiye ki kahi se koyi receipt mil
jaye…lekin mujhe kuch nahi mila….phhir maine mobile me sms check kiya ki
shayad kahi online booking karwayi hogi aur uska sms aaya hoga…lekin kisi
booking ya transaction ka koyi sms bhi nahi tha… maine apne mobile me call
history check ki lekin sabhi calls ek line se Nisha ke the.
“ab Gajini ke mafiq camera rakhna shuru kar de…lawda kuch yaad-vaad toh rahta
nahi…” colony se bahar aakar sadak par chalte hue maine kaha “ab toh itni raat
me yaha se city ke liye koyi auto bhi nahi milega…aur maro beta dialogues…kitna
acha dost tha…kitni achi maal thi…free me khana…free me choot…free me
wifi…upar se transport ki bhi facility…aur badle me kya karna tha ? kuch nahi
karna tha…lekin nahi…tu toh Shri Krishna ji ka bahut bada fan hai… aur bina
karm kiye rah hee nahi sakta….”
“aisi baat nahi hai…un sabko sabak sikhana tha ki jab main apne pe aata hoon toh
kya karta hoon…”
“very good…aur tune dikha bhi diya…kya tune apne zindagi se kuch nahi sikha ?
aur kitne jhatke tujhe chahiye serious banane ke liye…maine toh socha tha ki
college khatm hone ke baad tu ekdum serious ho jayega…”

120
“yahi meri quality hai be…ki mere sath kitna bhi kuch ho jaye…ek-do mahine ke
baad main normal jata hoon aur jisme meri ek philosophy bahut help karti hai…”
“kaun si philosophy”
“yahi ki is duniya me jo bhi chiz buri lage uska Mazak udana shuru kar do… jis-se
wo chiz thoda kam bura lagti hai aur kuch samay ke baad ek bhi nahi…jaise ki jab
Esha ne mujhe chhoda toh us-se paar paane ke liye main subah sham khana khan
eke baad khud se kahta tha ki… ye sahi hua… mere sath aisa hee hona chahiye tha.
Main gandu hoon… maha baklund hoon… chutiya hoon. Gali me bhagta hua ek
awara kutta hoon. Phhir main berojgar hua aur tab bhi maine aisa hee kiya…ki
lawda maine college me ayyashi ki…main bahut bada chodu hai…lavde ka baal
hoon… mujhe toh kahi jhadu marne ki bhi naukri nahi milegi etc.etc. ”
“ abey, tu khud ko motivate kar raha tha ya phhir demoralize kar raha tha…? By
the way…toh kya ab tu Esha ke bare me sochkar kabhi udas nahi hota…? Ya
Aradhna ke bare me sochkar ? ya phhir Sidar ke bare me sochkar ? kya tujhe bilkul
bhi bura nahi lagta ki college me tune sirf apne ego ke karan basketball ka ek bhi
match nahi khela…? Jab ki Gautam ke aalawa tere jaisa basketball koyi khel hee
nahi sakta tha…”
“hamesha nahi par kabhi-kabhi sochta hoon… thoda bura bhi lagta hai, lekin phhir
sochta hoon ki… ok… jo hua so hua…now move on….lekin aksar mere mann me ye
khayal bhi aata hai ki…Arman…chal chalkar un sabki *** chod dalte hai… par main
dono me se kuch nahi karta… matlab naa hee main unhe bhoolkar aage badhta
hoon aur na hee wapas jakar unki bajata hoon…main toh unse milo door yaha
Nagpur me baitha mutth maar raha hoon…. “
“toh iska matlab ye hua ki teri philosophy ka exception tu khud hai…”
“ as always… Actually main kahna ye chahta hoon ki mujhe abhi bilkul nahi pata
ki main kya kah raha hoon… kya bol raha hoon. mera abhi just break up hua hai…
maine apne bachpan ke dost ko khoya hai. Isliye main abhi thoda udas hoon ya
phhir khush hoon ? mujhe thik se kuch feel nahi ho raha… zara mere pupil (black
portion of eye) me dekh kar bata toh wo expand ho rahi hai ya shrink… yadi mere
pupils expand hue toh main excited hoon aur yadi shrink hue toh main udas hoon…
”
“lawda ,kuch dhang se nahi dikh raha…”

.
Yahi sab sochte-vicharte main bag taangkar chup-chap raat ke ek baje NH-6 me
chale ja raha tha ki pata nahi do log kaha se achanak tapak pade aur mujhe chaku
dikhakar wahi rok liya…ek mere saamne khada hua aur ek mere peeche…
“chal be samaan neeche rakh…” mere peeche khade shaks ne gurrate hue mujhse
kaha…
“samman… samman kaise neeche rakhte hai… ab kya lund ukhadkar neeche rakh
du..”
“samman nahi be… samaan. Apna bag neeche rakh”

121
“chal be..lavde…abhi lund fek kar marunga toh pura khandan chud jayega…”kahte
hue maine un dono me se ek ko jo mere samne khada tha use dhakka diya aur NH-6
me apna safar continue kiya…lekin tabhi unme se ek ne mere kandhe par tanga
bag pakad kar peeche kheecha…jiska karan main wahi peeche ki taraf ulta gir
gaya….
Mere neeche girne ke baad un dono me se ek mere chhati par baitha aur mere
garden me chaku rakhkar bola…
“tujhe pata bhi hai ki NH-6 me kitne murder…rape…loot hoti hai… hume khud nahi
maloom ki humne kitni baar logo ko loota hai… isliye chup-chap apna bag rakh
aur chalta ban….”
“pahli baat…mujhe darr nahi lag raha… dusari baat yadi tum dono mera bag
lootne me kamyab bhi hue… jo ki hoge nahi… toh bhi tum log itna bhari bag lekar
kaha tak bhagoge aur teesari baat tum dono apna kitna bhi jor laga lo, main tum
dono ko pel dunga… bosdiwalo, apne aap ko kabhi aaine me dekha hai…ek fook
marunga toh tum dono ki haddiya tak toot jayegi…chal hat…”bolkar maine apne
upar baithe us patle-duble insaan ke peeth me jordar mukka mara aur wo apna
peeth pakadkar wahi side me let gaya….
Apni sathi ki haalat dekhkar dusara wala bhi aaya lekin usne mujhse ladayi nahi
ki balki mujhse maafi mangte hue apne sathi ki madad karne laga…..
“bhaiya humko chhod do…hum log bahut garib hai…”
“toh ? garib ho toh kya logo ki gand hee mar logo ? khair mujhe isase kya… looto..
maaro… maro…ma chudao… lekin… lekin…tum logo ne mujhpar par hamla kiya
hai… isliye aise toh chhodunga nahi…waise bhi mere fans aajkal mujhpe shaq
karne lage hai… toh kya kiya jaye tum dono ke sath…police ke hawale kar du kya”
“bhaiyo chaho toh humari gand mar lo…lekin police ke hawale mat karna…”dono
rote hue ek sath bole…
“chal khol…”
“kya… ”
“khol na…”
“aisa na karo bhaiya…hum log bahut jyada garib hai…”
“tum dono itne jyada garib ho ki tum logo ke paas gand hee nahi hai…. muh se
hagte ho kya be…”
“humko maaf kar do…”
“tum dono ke jeb me jo-jo hai… wo sab kuch nikal kar mujhe do…”
“kya…”

122
“ek aur baar…kya bola toh... seedhe thane le jaunga”ek-ek jhapad un dono ko
markar maine kaha….jiske baad wo dono mere hath-pair jodne lage aur rote-rote
unke jeb me jo-jo tha nikal kar mujhe dene laga….
“kya be chindi choro… sirf dhayi hazar…chal koyi nahi daru ka kharcha nikal
gaya…”
Hath me dhayi hazar pakad kar main utha lekin mujhe tabhi yaad aaya ki
dushman ko kabhi peeth nahi dikhana chahiye aur tab toh bilkul nahi jab wo puri
tarah gusse me ho aur unke paas chaku ho… isliye main turant peeche palta aur
dekha ki unme se ek meri peeth par chaku khopne ki taiyari kar raha tha.
“teri maa ka…sale mujhe chaku marne ke jugad me tha…”
apna bag peeche se samne rotate karke maine bag us chor ki hath me de mara
jisase uska hath toh mujhse door ho gaya lekin chaku ab bhi uski hath me
tha…usne chaku bahut kaskar pakad rakha tha…isliye maine aav na dekha taav
aur apna bhari bharkam bag uthakar seedhe uske upar fek diya... is ummid se ki
mere bag me rakha mera laptop sahi salamt rahega…maine uske upar bag feka aur
wo wahi peeche mere bag ke sath neeche gir gaya… jiske baad maine wahi paas
khade dusare wale ke sar ka baal pakda, jo khali hath wahi khada tha aur uske pet
me do-teen mukka kas kar mar diya jisase wo apne aap wahi baith gaya…..
“kyun be tum dono chaku se marne wale the mujhe…”
“haan toh ,humara paisa lekar kyun bhag raha tha tu…”jise maine bag fek kar
mara tha wo zameen me pade-pade hee khisiyate hue bola…
“ sun be burchatte…khair chhod…tum dono apna chor pocket dikhao toh…”neeche

baithkar maine kaha
“nahi…”
“aise kaise nahi ”bolte hue maine zameen me pada chaku uthaya aur seedhe uske
hatheli ke beecho-beech ghusa diya.…jispar wo bahut jor se cheekha par uska
dusara sathi use bachane ke liye aage nahi aaya…wo jaha tha wahi par bina kisi
movements ke apne sathi ki hatheli ki taraf dekhta raha . Wo mujhe is samay dara
hua kam balki hairan jyada lag raha tha , main khud bhi apni is harqat se hairan
tha par jiske hath me maine abhi-abhi chaku khopa tha wo bilkul bhi hairan nahi
tha.wo toh lagatar chillaye ja raha tha… uski cheekhne ki aawaz itni tez thi ki
mujhe uske dusare hath se uska hee muh dabana pad gaya…. Taaki uske cheekhne
ki aawaz sunkar koyi use bachane na aa jaye
“chillata kyun hai be…mujhse adhik tujhe maloom hai ki is samay yaha koyi
madad ke liye nahi aane wala…” maine uske hath me ghusa hua chaku nikala aur
nishana lagakar chaku phhir se usi jagah wapas ghop diya…. “chal chilla…”
Wo abki baar aur jor se chillaya aur uske chillane ka asar hee tha ki uske sathi ne
jise maine do-teen mukka markar baitha diya tha…usne apne chor pocket se nikal
kar apna pura maal mere samne rakh diya….jise dekh kar meri aankhe chamak
gayi….kyunki uske jeb me hazar ke note ki ek gaddi bhi thi….
“shabash…ab apne dost ke andar wale jeb se maal nikal….”

123
“nahi…ye humare mohalle ka dada hai…yadi maine iski jeb se sona-chandi nikal
kar diya toh toh ye mujhe baad me bahut marega”
“ye toh tujhe baad me bas marega… lekin main… main toh teri maa hee chod
dunga…chal jaldi se iski bhi jeb khali kar , warna iske toh hath me chaku mara hai
tere toh main seedhe gardan me chaku ghusaunga ”
Jiske baad usne apne sathi ki jeb me hath dala aur jo kuch bhi uski jeb me tha nikal
kar mujhe diya aur maine gaur kiya ki hum dono ke hath kanp rahe the… jo is baat
ka sabot tha ki hum dono hee is kaam me nausikhiye the. abki baar meri aankh aur
bhi chamki kyunki uske jeb me sone-chadi ki kayi chains, bracelets aur ek-do
angoothi bhi thi….maine wo sab saman apne bag me bhara aur hazar ke note ki
gaddi jaise wallet me dalne laga waise hee mujhe apne wallet me mujhe yellow
colour ki ek receipt dikhayi di…
“Name-Shri Arman
Flat No. E-6….
Date- 25-09-2016”
“oh BC…ye maine kab book kiya ? acha tabhi main Nisha ko baar-baar ye bol raha
tha ki chal party se chalte hai ,maine ek flat book kar rakha hai… wow,aaj toh
main khud ka fan ho gaya hoon…pata nahi aage kya-kya hoga…”
.
NH-6 se main wapas colony ki taraf chal pada aur gate ke paas aakar apna bag
zameen par rakhkar bag me E-6 flat ki chabhi dhoondhane laga…kyunki jab maine
flat book kiya hai toh zaroor chabhi bhi mere paas hee hogi…aisa maine socha aur
meri ye soch ek dum sahi sabit hui kyunki mere bag ke side wale pocket me ek
chabhi thi…..
“yahich hogi…mere flat ki chabhi…kya number hai mere flat ka…E-6 ya E-5…. E- 6
hoga… E-5 to us Randi Vandana(R.Vandana) ka flat hai shayad…ab maza
aayega…jab main har roj nangi-nangi photos uske ghar me fekunga.Vandana
Rathi...hold your choot… Shri Arman is cumming…. ”
Maine receipt me dekha flat ka no. E-6 tha. Maine wo sabhi paise aur jewellery bag
me ekdum neeche dali jo maine choro se chori ki thi aur chup-chap apne flat me
chala gaya….
.
Subah uthkar maine adat anusar sabse pahle apna mobile uthaya aur bistar par
pade-pade gaana sunne laga ki tabhi mere mobile me ek messege aaya….messege
Nisha ne kiya tha isliye main ye janne ke liye bahut utsuk ho utha ki Nisha ne kya
likha hoga….
“mujhse tumse bas aakhiri baar milna hai…sham ko 5 baje park me aa jana…”
“kamal hai…itna sab kuch karne ke baad bhi ? ye mujhse milna chahti hai…ab kya
kahna hai ise…kahi ye in sabka koyi plan toh nahi ki mujhe park me bulwakar
marwa dale…. Waise bhi aaj ki date me kisi ka kya bharosa ? nahi jaunga ,faltu me
kahi lene ke dene pad gaye toh…? Waise bhi main kyun milu kisi aisi ladki se jo
mere layak hee nahi hai…”

124
Maine apna mobile ek taraf feka aur kal raat ki robbery me meri jitni kamayi hui
thi usko check karne laga….
“shuru me usne dhayi hazar diye…phhir hazar-hazar ki ek gaddi mujhe di…jisme

20 hazar the. mere account me abhi 22 hazar hai…upar se jo ye sona-chandi
hai…kam se kam 60-70 hazar ka maal hoga lekin black me bechunga…isliye 40-45
se jyada nahi milega…yani ki abhi mere paas 80k ke lagbhag rupaye hai….itne me
toh aish karunga main….waise bhi mujhe ab naukri ki zaroorat nahi…jab bhi paiso
ki zaroorat hogi main NH-6 me robbery karne nikal jaunga…. acha idea diya hai
un chutiyo ne…. phhir log mujhe kahenge ki….Shri Arman : The Criminal of NH-6
ya phhir The Robber of NH-6…ya phhir Pirates of the NH-6….NH-6 ke lootere…
sounds cool… par pahle is flat ko rahne layak banata hoon”
.
Maine pura din laga diya apne flat ko arrange karne me… jaise ki main daru ki
botal kaha rakhunga , kaha baithkar daru piyunga…apne flat ke kis room me
baithkar apni criminal activities ke plan banaunga…vagerah-vagerah aur sham
hote-hote tak sari arrangeent karne ke baad jab main naha dhokar bathroom se
nikla toh 6 baj chuke the...maine apna mobile uthaya aur dominos wale ko order
diya ki do large pizza wo fatafat le aaye… pizza order karne ke baad maine apna
mobile wapas bistar me ek taraf fek diya aur full taiyar hokar park ki taraf
chala…waise toh mujhe Nisha ne 5 baje bulaya tha lekin mujhe maloom tha ki wo
mera intezaar zaroor karegi…isiliye main bade aaram se park ki taraf ja raha
tha…
“hi….”mujhe dekhkar Nisha ne kaha…
“hi…sorry main thoda late ho gaya….”Nisha ke bagal me baithkar main bola “toh
kaha hai…baki ke log”
“baki ke log…kaun…”
“wahi David aur uske gunde… “aas-paas dekhte hue main bola… “kamal hai,mujhe
door-door tak na toh David dikh raha hai aur na hee koyi aisa jispar mujhe shaq
ho ki wo mujhe marne aaya ho…”
“mere aalawa yaha koyi nahi hai…Arman…”
“mujhe laga ki tum logo ka mujhe marne ka plan hoga…lekin jab tum logo ka aisa
koyi plan hee nahi hai toh phhir mujhe yaha kyun bulaya…”
“kyunki main tumse ye kahna chahati thi ki main tumse pyar karti hoon aur
hamesha karti rahungi…par ab main aur bardasht nahi kar sakti…main tumhe
bhool nahi sakti…par ab aur tumhare sath nahi rah sakti…tum jab mujhe pahli
baar mile the tab tum mere liye ek mystery the aur aaj jab main tumse aakhiri
baar mil rahi hoon…tab bhi tum mere liye ek mystery hee ho …mujhe nahi pata ki
tumne kal raat wo sab kyun kiya aur na hee main tumhe kuch kahungi…infact
maine tumse kal raat ek bahut achi chiz seekhi hai ki sirf apne bare me socho…sirf
khud se pyar karo… sirf apne ahankar me jiyo… kya kahte hai ise…”
“may be Narcissism…”

125
“I don’t know and I don’t care….isiliye maine ye decision liya hai ki aaj ke baad
humara ye rishta yahi par khatm ho jayega….Remember Arman, jab tum mujhe
pahle baar Eternity me mile the… hum dono ek-dusre se takraye the…aam taur par
log ek-dusare se sorry bolte hai aur maine bola bhi tha lekin tumne mujhe sorry
nahi bola…ulta mujhe hadka diya ki main tumhe line maar rahi hoon… uske baad
humari mulaqat yahi isi park me hui…Arman…tumhe main bata nahi sakti ki main
tumhe kitna pyar karti hoon…main tumhe kabhi bhool nahi paungi aur na hee
bhoolna chahti hoon… kyunki meri life ka sabse acha samay tumhare sath
beeta…toh kya hua yadi ab tum mujhse thik se pesh nahi aate…toh kya hua ki
tumne meri bahut insult ki…actual me tum aise nahi ho…maine gaur kiya hai ki ye
tumhari sachchayi nahi hai…tumne apne aap ko kahi chhupa rakha hai…aur main
aaj tak isi ummid me thi ki ek din main tumhare us chhipe hue Arman ko bahar le
aaungi….lekin main isme kamyab nahi hui aur yahi meri nakamyabi thi…galti
meri thi…tum toh hamesha se aise the…tumne mujhe pahle bhi kaha tha ki samay
ke sath tumhara bartaav kharab ho jayega…lekin main hee bewkoof thi jo har baar
tumse baat karne pahuch jati thi… shayad main tumhare layak hee nahi aur aaj ke
baad hum kabhi nahi milenge. Please… aaj ke baad mujhse milne ki koshish mat
karna ”itna bolkar Nisha uthi aur waha se jaane lagi…..
“ayusman bhava…”apni aankh mijte hue maine kaha “and don’t worry… mujhme
kisi ko manane ka feature bhagwan ne diya hee nahi hai… isliye befikar raho, main
sapne me bhi tumse sorry nahi bolunga ya manane aaunga , reality me toh bahut
door ki baat hai. Afterall I’m a Narcissist ”
Chapter-14 : Relative Motion(Present≈Past)
“mujhe call mat karna ab aur na hee koyi sms chahiye mujhe…”cheekh kar maine
kaha
“I won’t…aur maine apna number change kar diya hai…isliye tum bhi mujhe call
ya sms mat karna…”
“toh tum us David ke liye mujhe chhodkar ja rahi ho…”
“David ka toh yaha sawal hee nahi aata Arman…”wapas mudkar Nisha boli “ye
kahani sirf hum dono ki thi…”
“nahi…tune jabran David ko is kahani me ghusaya… warna kisi ko kya interest

hoga tere bachpan ke dost pe”
“David ne meri family ko abuse nahi kiya….David ne kal raat daru peekar
hungama nahi kiya…David ne mujhe kabhi nahi rulaya…par isme bhi galti meri
hee hai…mujhe kya pata tha ki David ke sath rahne ke karan tum itna insecure feel
karoge…aur yahi chiz prove karti hai ki tum wo nahi ho jo tum sari duniya ko
dikha rahe ho…Arman I’m sorry… tum mahan ho,lekin hum nahi..hum normal log
hai aur hume normal logo ke sath rahna hee pasand hai…in short…tumhari
language me kahu toh hum tumhare layak hee nahi hai…mujhe ummid hai ki jo
tumhare layak hai ya jise tum chahte ho wo tumhe mil jayegi…Goodbye…Arman”
“good…bye…Goodbye…Ni…Nisha….Goodbye Nisha…love you 85 %....”

126
Iske baad Nisha waha se chali gayi…usne ek baar bhi peeche mudkar nahi dekha
lekin main use tab tak dekhta raha jab tak ki wo mere aankho ke samne se oojhal
nahi ho gayi…
“toh kya yahi ant hai ? the great Arman aur Nisha ki story ka….? Ya phhir koyi aur
twist hai…aur ye meri aankh se aansu kyun nikal rahe hai…shayad kam sone ki
vazah se…. mujhe koyi fark nahi padta kisi ke aane-jaane se.main toh bilkul bhi
dukhi nahi hoon…ya phhir hoon lekin mujhe pata tak nahi hai…? …anyway ,lets
follow the procedure…”
Maine goggle lagaya aur cigarette jalakar lambe-lambe kash marte hue Nisha ko
jaate hue dekhta raha…aur tabhich mere muh se nikla…
“Love you ,Nisha….now 100 %.....i hope you’ll find your right one…better than
me…smarter than me… I’ll always remember your tight boobs ”
.
Meri zindagi se ab kayi logo ka patta kat chukka tha jaise ki Varun… Nisha…
David… Sonam… Shipra isliye mujhe ab bahut sukoon tha…mera matlab main
bata nahi sakta ki in sabke chale jaane se main kitna khush hoon …ab no more
..time pe ye karna…wo karna aur no more Nisha ke boring call jhelna…kuch dino
se toh BC Varun bhi philosopher ke mafiq lecture dene laga tha matlab ki wo
launda jo 3 cm diameter ka circle bhi dhang se nahi bana sakta tha wo mujhe
aajkal ye bata raha tha mujhe life me kya karna chahiye. Wo toh phhir bhi chalo
mera dost hai… I mean dost tha, isliye use main ignore bhi kar sakta hoon lekin ye
David… Nisha par meri full sulgi hui thi aur toh aur tumhe yakin nahi hoga ki
Sonam bhi mujhe suggestions de chuki hai. sabki suggestion chahe kitni bhi alag
kyun na ho, kitni bhi achchhi kyun na ho… sab me 9 to 5 wali job common rahti
hai…BC sale…inke suggestion sunkar mujhe aisa lagta hai ki jaise koyi mujhe ye
sikha raha ho ki mujhe basketball kaise khelna hai…par ab jo aham sawal tha wo
ye ki ab iske aage kya…ab kya meri puri zindagi E-6 me akele beetegi ?kitna
achchha ho ki colony me rahne wale sab log mar jaye. Tab toh sala maza hee aa
jaye. Ya phhir main inko ek-ek karke marna shuru kar du. ?
.
Park me main bahut der tak baitha raha aur jab raat ko 9 baje park band karne ka
samay hua toh colony ke guard ne mujhe hosh me lakar waha se jaane ke liye
kaha…
“9 baj gaye…. ? you're right... 9 baj gaye hai”apni aankhe jaldi-jaldi laplapate hue
ghadi me time dekhkar maine kaha “acha hua us dominos wale ko phone karke bol
diya tha ki mere na rahne par parcel gate ke andar rakh de….”
Main park se bahar nikalkar apne flat ki taraf chal diya.is puri colony me E-6
sabse aakhiri flat tha isliye jab se main yaha shift hua tha tab se mujhe aisi feeling
aane lagi thi jaise ki main is duniya ke sabse aakhiri chhor me rahta hoon…main
apne flat ke andar ghusa aur pizza uthakar andar jaane laga toh dekha ki E-5 ki
light jal rahi thi…..
“Rathi…ise zara ahsaas dilate hoon ki main yaha aa gaya hoon…lekin kaise ? ise
maa-behan ki gali du ya phhir deewar me chadhkar uske side moot du ya phhir

127
iske boundary ki deewar me patthar se choot ka diagram bana du ? ek kaam karta

hoon…”
Maine apne room ka lock kholkar parcel andar rakha aur bahar se ek patthar
uthakar Rathi ke darwaje par nishana sadhne laga…..
“darwaje pe nahi…khidki me maar…”
“good idea, two point zero”
Maine darwaje se khidki par apna target shift kiya aur ghuma kar R.Rathi ki
khidki par patthar mar aur bhagkar apne room ke andar ghus gaya….Patthar
seedhe jakar Rathi mam ki khidki se takraya tha… kyunki kaanch tootne ki bahut
tez aawaz mere kano me padi thi.
“tu ruk…Vandana Rathi…tujhe yaha se shift nahi karwaya toh bolna…gand fad
dalunga teri main ab…tujhe pata nahi ki tune kis-se panga liya hai…. Bas mera
mood thoda aur satakne de tere upar, phhir dekh main kya-kya karta hoon…. Tune
mujhe do letters ka option diya tha na… wahi do letter main roll karke tere dono
chhed me dalunga… Good night.”
Main chahe upar se kitna bhi dikhawa kar loon lekin isme koyi shaq nahi ki Main
ab bilkul akela ho gaya tha…mera ab na toh koyi dost tha aur na hee koyi
girlfriend…aur na hee mere paas koyi kaam tha…yani ki perfect life… yahi toh
main chahta tha…par ab sabse bada jo sawal tha wo ye ki ab kya ? Maine Arun ke
new number pe call kiya , jo usne mujhe yaha aakar diya tha…
“aur lawde kaha hai…”Arun ke call receive karte hee main turant bol utha… lekin
us taraf se koyi aawaz nahi aayi…
“bolega be bosdiwale…”maine phhir se Arun ke samman me pyar bhare shabd

kahe… lekin abki baar bhi udhar se koyi aawaz nahi aayi… jis-se mujhe apni galti
ka ahsaas hua ki mujhe direct gali se shuruat nahi karna chahiye tha.
“hello… hello…. Kuch toh bol…”
“kaun hai bad-tameez”ek aurat ki cheekhti hui aawaz mere kaan me padi, jiske
turant baad maine call disconnect ki aur khud se bola “lagta hai Arun ki Maa ya
Behan ne call uthaya tha… relax… hota hai aisa…”
Mobile jeb me rakhkar maine bistar se 6 feet ki doori naapi aur waha paas ek
kapda rakhkar dusare room me gaya aur dusare room se daudkar jaha maine
marking ke liye kapda tha... waha se seedhe bistar par jump kiya
“woohoo , I did it…”dhadam se land hote hue maine hafte hue kaha par phhir thodi
der baad mujhe pata chala ki main asal me nahi haaf raha tha balki hafne ki acting
kar raha tha....

128
Ab kya karu… pahle school kiya , phhir degree bhi hasil ki …do –teen jagah naukri
bhi ki aur un sabne mujhe naukri se nikal diya...toh ab kya ? another job ? ya phhir
kuch aur….
“yadi main phhir koyi private naukri karunga toh phhir se nikal ke fek diya
jaunga…isliye abki baar, Modi Sarkar…yani ki ab samay aa gaya hai…jab main
sarkari naukri ke liye taiyari karu….kyunki yahi wo field hai jaha main apne
seniors se ladayi karke bhi bana rah sakta hoon…okay…phhir done ki mujhe
sarkari naukri karni hai…lekin kaun si…IAS ? nahi lawda…isme gand fad mehnat
hai…GATE ? ye thik hai…ab apun gate ki taiyari karunga aur gate ke sath-sath
khidki…bhi nikal lunga….”
“waise gate se yaad aaya ki gate ka form bharna shuru ho gaya hoga…toh bhar du
?”
“bhar de…”
“pakka… padhte waqt disturb toh nahi karega na…”
“version 2.0’s promise”
“pakka na…”
“ab kya lawda sperm se likh kar du…”
“ok, done phhir….”

.
Maine gate ka form bhara aur gate ka form bharne ke baad zameen par let kar
cigarette peete hue gate ki preparation ka plan banana laga…
“ek din me chaubis ghante…jisme se char ghante sone ke liye…dus ghante padhai
ke liye…do ghante cigarette aur daru peene ke liye…10+4+2= 16…phhir bhi 8
ghante bach rahe hai…chalo isme se do ghante NH-6 me loot ke liye nikal deta
hoon….phhir bhi 6 ghante seedhe-seedhe khali hai…ok…16 ghante gate ki
preparation…char ghante sone ke liye aur…do ghante NH-6 me dhamaka karne ke
liye aur baki bache do ghante cigarette aur daru peene ke liye…16+4+2+2= 24
hours…L.H.S. = R.H.S. , hence proved….lekin aaj se nahi…abhi toh bahut taiyari
karni hai….”
.
Yahi sochate hue main zameen par letkar bina kash khiche cigarette jalata raha
aur phhir pura dum lagakar ek kash khicha.cigarette ke us ek dumdar kash ke
dauran meri nazar ceiling fan par gayi….fan bahut tez chal raha tha aur jis
direction me pankha ghoom raha tha(clockwise) meri aankh bhi usi direction me
ghoomne lagi…shuru-shuru me toh mere aankh ke ghoomne ki speed bahut slow
thi…lekin samay ke sath mere aankh ki bhi ghoomne ki speed badhti gayi….maine
ye sab aise hee time pass ke liye shuru kiya tha lekin ab ye rook nahi raha
tha…meri aankh itni tez rotate karne lagi thi mera sar chakrane laga tha…aur
phhir ek samay aisa aaya jab meri aankh ki rotational speed fan ke rotational
speed ko match kar gayi….jiska pata mujhe tab chala jab fan dheere-dheere slow
hokar rook gaya tha…lekin ye haqiqat me nahi hua tha….haqiqat me toh fan ab bhi
129
ghoom raha tha…jiski hawa main mahsoos kar sakta tha…actually ho ye raha tha
ki mere aankh ki rotational speed fan ki speed ke equal ho gayi thi…yani ki fan aur
mere aankh ke beech relative motion zero ho chukka tha…isliye mere room ka
ceiling fan mujhe rooka hua dikh raha tha…jabki actual me wo bahut tez speed ke
sath ghoom raha tha aur meri aankh bhi.
Main kab tak aise hee zameen par pada raha mujhe nahi maloom par bahar jab
kisi ne mera name pukara toh main mano hosh me aaya aur apni aankh mijte hue
bahar gaya…..
“Varun tu… ?”
“kyun be…aaj coaching nahi jana kya…”
“lawda,phhir se past me never mind…pankhe ki maa ki choot….”
“kya bol raha hai be…chal jaldi…warna janta hai na ki physics wala teacher kaise
insult karta hai…”
“tu do minute rook, main do minute me aaya…”
Varun ko rukne ke liye kahkar main andar gaya aur apne bag se sara samaan
zameen me fek-kar sirf ek rough copy bag me dalkar bahar aa gaya. maine Physics
ki book bhi nahi li thi kyunki jo Physics main tution me padhne wala tha ,wo sab
mujhe pata tha balki us-se kuch jyada hee matlba bahut jyada. You know its apun’s
language….maine apne gharwalo ko aawaz di…lekin meri aawaz sunkar koyi nahi
aaya jis-se maine ek aur baar aawaz di par nateeza wahi raha…yani ki is baar bhi
kisi ne koyi response nahi diya…jisase mujhe shaq hua ki kahi kisi ne silently mere
ghar walo ko tapka toh nahi diya…isliye maine pura ghar chhan mara …..
“kamal hai ,mere ghar me mere aalwa koyi nahi hai…”bahar aate hue main Varun
se bola “tujhe pata hai kya Varun ki mere gharwale kaha gaye hai…”
“mujhe kaise pata hoga…”apna kandha uchkate hue Varun ne jor se jawab diya….
“toh chillata kahe hai be…”ek mukka markar maine Varun se kaha…
“waise tune mujhe kal school me bataya tha ki tu ,kal apne family ke sath kisi
Pandey ji ke yaha jayega…lagta hai tere gharwale tujhe chhodkar chale gaye…
main toh ye bhool hee gaya tha, warna tere ghar thode aata.lekin achchha hee hua
ki aa gaya”
“ho sakta hai…main toh so raha tha…ya phhir ye bhi ho sakta hai ki maine hee
jaane ke liye mana kar diya ho…waise aaj taarikh kaun si hai…”
“28”
“full form me bata be..”
“28th November 2009…”

130
“November….mahina chal raha hai ? ”
“haan toh isme itna khush kyun ho raha hai….”
“chal bata ki 2011 me world cup kaun jeetega…”
“India…”Varun ne jawab diya….
Aur Varun ka jawab sunte hee main road par khushi se nachne laga…yesss…yani
ki yun hardum past me aana meri koyi bimari nahi hai…balki ek ability hai…main
past events ko change kar sakta hoon…past me jakar apna messege de sakta
hoon…jiske according sab kuch real me change ho sakta hai…toh kya is tarah main
apne college ki story badal sakta hoon ? bilkul badal sakta hoon…? Main
councilling ke dauran us college ka option hee nahi dalunga…jisme main padh
chuka hoon…is tarah main apna future safe kar lunga…yay… main mahan, mera
sab kuch mahan…
“itna naach kyun raha hai…”mujhe bakchod ki tarah sadak par kudate-fadte dekh
Varun ne pucha…
“tu nahi samjhega…tu ye bata ki 2015 me india world cup jeetegi ya nahi…”
“mujhe kya pata…wo toh tu kal school me ek ladke se 2011 world cup kaun jeetega
is topic me ladayi kar raha tha…tera kahna tha ki India aur us ladke ka kahna tha
ki Australia…aur tu ab mujhse na lade isliye maine India kah diya….”
“lavde ke baal…”apne emotion ko control karke maine Varun ke pichhwade me ek

laat meri aur badle me apne pichhwade me ek laat bhi khayi aur phhir apna
pichhwada sahlate hue bola…
“main khamkha kya-kya sochne laga tha…lekin tune mere sare armano par muh se
mutth mar diya…”
“muh se mutth…?”bolkar Varun apna muh alag-alag shape me banana laga…

“yuck”
“ab ye kya kar raha hai…”
“muh se mutth maar raha hoon…”
“bakchod sale…acha ye bata…tution me kaun sa topic chal raha hai…”
“laws of motion…”
“mujhse sab banta hai…”

.
Kya maine kabhi apne school ke physics teacher ke bare me bataya hai ? mujhe
thik dhang se yaad nahi…isliye yadi bataya bhi ho toh ,dobara bata deta
hoon…humare school ke Physics teacher ka name Amarnath Shukla tha…aur sala
ek number ka chodu…bakchod…lanth aadmi tha…aap zindagi me ek baar kisi ladki
ko samajh sakte ho lekin Amarnath ko samajh pana….koyi chance hee
131
nahi….humne uska name pyar se Amaru rakha hua tha…jo ki use bhi pata
tha…lekin wo ise enjoy karta tha…uski ek khas property thi ki wo standard
temperature aur atmospheric pressure me kisi ke bhi samne, kisi ko bhi… kuch bhi
bol deta tha ,phhir chahe wo uske students ho ya phhir uska beta…ya phhir uski
biwi. Uski biwi tana-tan maal thi aur ghar me aane wale har mard ko vaasna ki
nazar dekhti thi…ya phhir nahi dekhti thi…main is bare me confirm nahi
hoon…lekin Amaru ka launda bahut pahuchi hui chiz tha…ghar me jaha wo gand-
fati me rahta wahi bahar full ayyashi pelta tha…mujhe ab bhi yaad hai Amaru ke
bete ka ek kissa jisme usne apne se 6 saal badi ladki ko bus-stand me khullam
khulla propose mara tha…wo bhi apne liye nahi balki apni colony me rahne wale
apne jaise hee ek launde ke liye… us din humari toh gand hee fat gayi thi aur hum
soch me pad gaye the ki BC Amaru ne kis angle se apni biwi ko chodkar ise paida
kiya hai.anyway….
Amaru ko Physics ke bare me knowledge toh bahut tha lekin uske ajeeb bartaav ke
karan uski class science ki class kam…comedy classes jyada lagti thi…aur bas yahi
se mujhe physics me interest aaya…dusare shabdo me kahu toh Amaru mera
inspiration tha aur yadi ise teesare sabdo me kahu toh Amaru hee wo shaks tha jis-
se maine seekha tha ki Physics aur bakchodi ko mixup kaise karna hai.
Hum paanch launde Amaru ke yaha physics padhne jaya karte the…par waha
padhayi kam bakchodi jyada hoti thi…abhi Shukla ji ne first law of motion
padhaya hee tha ki unhe bhookh lagne lagi….aur unhone apni biwi ko khana lane
ke liye kaha….
“tum log bhi khaoge kya…”
“nahi sir…”Varun ne jawab diya…
“dekho agla topic hai force yani ki bal…jab tum kisi bhi chiz ko dhakka dete ho aur
wo gati karne lagti hai toh usme bal ki ek matra kaam karti hai…jise hum F=ma se
nikalte hai…lekin yadi bal lagane se wo chiz ya vastu gati nahi karti toh….”
“sir, wo bal nikalne ka derivation aapne nahi bataya…”smart banne ki koshish

karte hue Varun ne ek sawal daga…
“ajeeb aadmi ho yar, tum toh Physics ki maiyya chod de rahe ho.beech me disturb
kyun kar rahe ho..bakchod-vakchod ho ka…Arman, maro sale ko…”
Amarnath sir ne aisa kaha…jo ki unka chir-parichit andaaz tha aur phhir maine
bhi apne chir-parichit andaaz me ghuma ke ek mukka Varun ki peeth me jama
diya…
“ab aage se disturb mat karna…. Dekho,jab tum kisi bhi chiz ko dhakka dete ho aur
wo gati karne lagti hai toh usme bal ki ek matra hoti hai…jise hum F=ma se nikalte
hai…lekin yadi bal lagane se wo chiz ya vastu gati nahi karti toh usme lagaya gaya
bal zero hota hai lekin iska matlab ye nahi hota ki usme koyi bal nahi lagaya
gaya…example dekho…”
Example dikhane ke liye Amarnath sir apni table se uthe aur apna pura jor lagakar
apni ghar ki deewar ko dono hatho se dhakka dete hue bole…

132
“ye dekhhhoo… maine is deewar me apne dono hatho se bal lagaya lekin deewar
me koyi motion nahi hua…lekin yaad rakhna ki bal phhir bhi lag raha hai…lag
raha hai…lagte hee ja raha hai…ufff…gand fat gayi”
jo example Amarnath ne hume bataya tha…wo physics ki book me bhi tha aur hum
sab easily samajh bhi gaye the lekin Amarnath sir the ki hume demonstration dene
me tule hue the…wo is samay deewar ko puri taqat ke sath dhakel rahe the aur
unhe aisa karte dekh hum sab jor-jor se hasne lage…
“dekho…deewar ki position me koyi changes nahi hai…lekin bal lag raha hai…lag
raha hai…kamal hai yar, main idhar padha raha hoon …udhar tum log has rahe
ho…bakchod ho ka sab ke sab…tumlog ko physics padhane se achchha hai ki main
konte me jakar mutth maar loon…”
Bal lagne ka demonstration dene ke baad Amarnath sir wapas apni chair par
baithe aur bistar ki chadar se apna paseena pochhne lage…
“sir, ab bhi bal lag raha hai kya…”maine pucha…
“bal lag raha hai aur lagte hee ja raha hai”
Amarnath ne apna paseena saaf karne ke baad apne launde ko bulaya aur apne jeb
se saman ki list nikal kar use saman lane ke liye kaha.jise unka launda turant
lekar aa gaya…
“tumhara khana nahi bana kya…”andar apni biwi ko aawaz marte hue sir ne
puchha
“bas nikal rahi hoon”
“jaldi lao…”
Ab hume padhana chhod Sir wo saman dekhne lage ,jo unka beta lekar aaya
tha…aur jab unhone bag me rakha saman pura check kar liya toh apne bête ko
paas bulaya aur use ek thappad markar puchha…
“poha kyun nahi laya…”
“mummi ne mana kiya tha…”cheekhte hue unke bête ne jawab diya jispar sir ne ek
aur thappad mar kar kaha…
“hum na, tumhari mahtari ke gand me char laat markar wapas bhej
denge…samjhe…ab ja yaha se aur apni mahtari ko bol ki khana laye”
Itne me unki wife unke liye khana lekar aa gayi…unki wife ne humse bhi pucha ki
kya hum log bhi khana khayenge lekin humare naa bolne par wo hum sabko smile
dekar andar chali gayi….Amarnath sir bahut der tak thali ko ghoorte rahe aur
phhir eka-ek tez aawaz me unhone apni biwi se pucha…
“ye kya banayi ho ji…”
“kadhi…chawal “unki biwi ne andar se hee jawab diya…

133
“ye kadhi chawal hai….ya tatti chawal…kyun ji Varun, tum dekh ke batao…ki ye
kya hai…”
“nahi sir…mujhe nahi dekhna…”
“are dekho toh…tatti type se dikh rahi hai ya nahi…’
“yuck…”
“bathroom se tatti lakar chawal me mila diya hai…main nahi khaunga “bolkar
Amarnath ne thali zameen par fek di…jisase tatti chawal…sorry I mean kadhi
chawal zameen par idhar-udhar fail gaya aur jis thali me kadhi chawal tha wo
round-round wahi zameen par ghoomne laga…
Shuru me mujhe ye normal laga lekin jab bahut der tak wo thali round-round
ghoomte rahi toh mera bheja apni jagah se khiska aur maine apne aas-paas dekha.
Mere saare dost dheere-dheere waha se gayab ho rahe the aur waha se jab bhi koyi
gayab hota tab gayab hone ke pahle unka sharir halka sa chamkane lagta tha.ab
waha sirf main akela baacha tha…waha ab na toh Varun tha …na hee mere dost
aur na hee Amarnath sir…sab log waha se achanak gayab ho gaye the par zameen
me giri wo thali ab bhi usi speed ke sath waha zameen par gol-gol ghoom rahi thi…
“woohooo iska matlab ab main wapas present me jaane wala hoon…kitna hoshiyar
hoon main…aur abki baar toh mujhe darr bhi nahi lag raha…ok… ulti ginti
shuru….three…two…one…”bolte hue maine apni aankhe band ki aur thodi der
baad apni aankhe kholi….
“ye kaise mumkin hai…main ab bhi yahi hoon…”chauk kar maine kaha…maine
phhir se apni aankhe band ki aur teen tak ki ulti ginti shuru ki…
“abki baar hindi me karta hoon, lagta hai time travel walo ko English nahi
aati.ok…teen…paune teen…dhayi…do…ek...vartman me aapka swagat hai… par ye
kya…main phhir ab bhi hoon…wtf…ye kaam kyun nahi kar raha..kahi maine apni
ability kho toh nahi di..”
“tum yaha se tab tak nahi jaoge …jab tak main nahi chah leti…”andar se bahar
aate hue Amarnath ki biwi boli…
Maine ek baar phhir gol-gol ghoom rahi thali ki taraf dekha….ye kaise possible
hai..ye toh sarasar physics ke khilaf hai…mana ki Amaru ne isme bal lagaya
tha…lekin isme toh ab bhi bal lag raha hai…lag raha hai….lagte hee jar aha
hai.rukne ka naam hee nahi le raha hai.
“kya…tumne meri aawaz nahi suni…tum yaha se tab tak nahi jaoge …jab tak main
nahi chah leti…”mere saamne khadi hote hui Amarnath ki biwi boli…
“maine suni thi..par mujhe maloom hai janeman ki, tu real nahi hai…isliye maine
dhyan nahi diya…”Amarnath sir ki biwi ki taraf dekhte hue main bola aur sath me
buri tarah chauk bhi gaya….

134
Amarnath sir ki biwi is samay mere samne khadi thi…par ye mere buri tarah
chaukne ki vazah nahi thi…main buri tarah chauka, uski vazah ye thi ki Amarnath
ki biwi mere samne is samay puri nangi khadi thi aur unka pura badan pani me
bhiga hua tha….maine unhe dekha aur unhe dekhte hee main unhe dekhta rah
gaya…
“mujhe pata hai ki…tum inke paas coaching padhne kyun aate ho…tum apne dosto
se kahte ho ki Amarnath sir bahut funny hai…isliye tum unke paas padhne jaate
ho…lekin main aur tum bhali-bhati jante hai ki yaha tum kyun aate ho…yaha tum
mere liye aate ho….”aage badhte hue wo boli…aur jaise-jaise wo meri taraf badh
rahi thi mera gala sookhta ja raha tha…
Amarnath sir ki biwi apne pure badan se pani tapkate hue bistar par chadhi aur
phhir apne ek pair se mere lund ko sahlane lagi…..sahlane kya,ye bolo masalne
lagi…yaha tak usko bhi.
“tum batao Arman…kya tum mujhe chodne ki ichchha lekar yaha nahi aayt…”
“haan…mera matlab na…bilkul nahi”
“mujhe…jhooth bardasht nahi…. sach batao…”

unhone apni peeth mere taraf kar di aur jhuk kar apni gand meri taraf karke
mujhse puchhi
“kya tum isme apna lund nahi ghusana chahte….”
“chahta hoon..mera matlab nahi chahta hoon..aaa, abey apna pair toh hata
raand” dard se karahte hue maine kaha…
Jiske baad Amarnath sir ki biwi wapas meri oor palti aur apna ek pair mere lund
se hatakar seedhe mere mathe par rakh kar mujhe bistar me let jaane ka ishara
kiya….mere bistar par let jane ke baad usne apna ek pair mere baye kandhe ke
bagal me rakha aur apna dusara pair mere daye kandhe ke bagal me rakha…jisase
uske sharir aur choot se pani tapak kar seedhe mere muh me girne laga….maine
apna muh band kiya aur use hatane ki koshish ki…lekin wo apni jagah se hili tak
nahi…maine ek aur baar koshish ki lekin wo thi ki pahad ke mafiq apni jagah par
khadi rahi…yani ki bal lag raha tha lekin motion zero tha….aur uske choot se pani
ki boond lagatar muh me gir rahi thi….maine use apne upar se hatane ki kayi
koshish ki lekin main har baar nakam raha...wo bahut der tak mere upar pani
tapkati rahi aur phhir ahiste se wo mere muh ke upar baith gayi…jisase uski choot
ya phhir gand seedhe mere muh ke contact me aaya….
“iski maa ka…bc randi….uth…Sali…burchatta samajh ke rakhi hai kya

mujhe…abey main Shri Arman hoon…” ghuti-ghuti aawaz me maine kaha…lekin
Amarnath sir ki biwi thi ki mere upar se hatne ka naam hee nahi le rahi thi…balki
wo apne choot ko mere muh me aur bhi jyada force ke sath dabaye ja rahi
thi…jisase mera dum ghootne laga… mujhe saans lene me dikkat hone lagi…meri
aankhe dum ghutne ki vazah se ab apne aap band hone lagi thi aur apni aankh puri
tarah se band hone ke pahle maine jo aakhiri chiz dekhi wo ye ki jo thali itni der se

135
non-stop full speed ke sath ghoom rahi thi…uski speed ab dheere-dheere kam ho
rahi thi….
“ab samjha…”lagatar kam hoti thali ki speed ko dekhkar maine khud se kaha
“jaise-jaise thali ki speed kam hogi, meri jaan waise-waise version 1.0 se 3.0 me
transfer hogi aur jab thali ekdum se ruk jayegi…tab main completely version 3.0
me transfer ho jaunga…ye sara khel relative motion ka hai, BC….anyway, abki
baar counting sankrit me karta hoon… shayad safal ho jaun…ok… countdown in
sanskrit…treeni…dve…ekam…”
.
Aur abki baar sanskrit me meri counting kaam kar gayi…main sach me apne
present time me laut chuka tha…jiska andaza mujhe tab hua jab maine khud ko
apne flat me pankhe ke neeche leta hua paya… maine dekha ki pankhe ki speed
lagatar badh rahi thi yani ki ab meri aankh aur pankhe ke beech Relative motion
ab zero nahi tha…
“ab samjha ki main past me kyun chala jata hoon…actually ye sab kuch relative
motion ka kamal hai…time ko teen part me divide kiya gaya
hai….present…past..future aur in sabki apni alag-alag speed bhi hogi…aur isiliye
hum time ke is boundation ko paar nahi kar pate par jab kinhi do time ki yani ki
Past,Present ya present,future ki velocity kisi bhi vyakti ke liye same ho jati hai toh
wo vyakti time ke is boundation ko cross kar sakta hai…jaise ki kuch dino se mere
sath ho raha hai...actual me ye sab relative motion ka khel hai…jab-jab main past
me jata hoon tab-tab mere liye past aur present ki relative speed zero hoti
hai…nahi zero nahi…zero se thodi adhik hoti hogi…tabhi toh present ka ek ghanta
past ke lagbhag 12 ghante ke barabar hota hai…yani ki relative velocity zero nahi
hoti balki zero se thodi adhik hoti hai…par itni adhik nahi ki main past me na ja
saku…jaise ki do train jo dheere-dheere chal rahi hai…unme se ek train ka
passenger dusari train me kood kar chala jata hai..kyunki us samay un dono train
ki speed bahut kam hoti hai….aur jab ye past aur present wapas apne original
speed me move karne lagte hai toh main past dwara wapas apne samay me fek
diya jata hoon…kyunki tab santulan banaye rakhne ke liye present mujhe wapas
bula leta hai…yani ki kul milakar ye sab relative velocity ka khel hai…is it ? ya
phhir koyi aur reason hai ? gand maraye…Shri Arman toh ab daru peekar
mathematics solve karenge…wo bhi raatbhar. Kitna stamina hai mere
andar…main just abhi-abhi ek duniya se dusari duniya me aaya hoon aur aate hee
padhne baith gaya sach kahta hoon maine apne se jyada mahan insaan aaj tak
nahi dekha….aur isi mahanta ko sakshi maankar main ye shapath leta hoon ki
main Physics-Putra Shri Arman, kal Ganga-Jamuna randi chodne jaunga.”
Chapter-15: Ganga-Jamuna
Update-47
is it ? ya phhir koyi aur reason hai ? gand maraye…Shri Arman toh ab daru peekar
mathematics solve karenge…wo bhi raatbhar. Kitna stamina hai mere
andar…main just abhi-abhi ek duniya se dusari duniya me aaya hoon aura ate hee
padhne baith gaya. sach kahta hoon maine apne se jyada mahan insaan aaj tak
nahi dekha….aur isi mahanta ko sakshi maankar main ye shapath leta hoon ki
main Physics-Putra Shri Arman, kal Ganga-Jamuna randi chodne jaunga.”
136
Main apne room se bahar nikla aur dekha ki Vandana Rathi ka flat yani ki E-5 ki
khidki tooti hui thi...lekin maine uspar jyada dhyan nahi diya Aur waha se aage
badh gaya….
“rook BC…aaj goli marunga…bahut udd rahi thi Sharda Enterprises me…ab tere
wahi pankh…jiske dum par tu itna udd rahi thi…unhe katkar teri gand me nahi
bhar diya toh bolna….Vandana Rathi, tere achchhe din aane wale hai..”
Vandana Rathi ko aisi kayi galiya dekar main colony se bahar aaya aur NH-6 me
khade hokar auto ka intezaar karne laga….tabhi ek autowala mere paas aakar
ruka…
“kaha malik…”auto rok kar auto wale ne mujhse pucha…
“Ganga-jamuna…itwari…”
“baitho…”
“hata nahi jaunga…”bolkar main auto se thoda door aa gaya…
“kyun nahi jaoge malik…”apni garden side se nikal kar us autowale ne pucha…
“mujhe tere auto ka number nahi pasand…upar se tera auto diesel se chalta hai
jiske chalte humara environment ka santulan bigad raha hai aur main nahi chahta
ki log ye bole ki Shri Arman ko apne earth ke environment ki koyi parvaah nahi
hai…tu khud soch itna bada aadmi hokar main aisa chhota kaam
karunga…”goggle lagate hue maine kaha “so best option for you is just get lost…”
Maine us auto me nahi gaya aur na hee uske baad aane wale agle teen auto
me…problem wahi ki wo sab auto diesel se chalne wale the…
“ganga-jamuna, itwari chaloge kya…”finally jab ek petrol se chalne wala auto

aaya toh use rukwa kar maine puchha…jiske baad wo auto wala aur uske auto me
baithe sabhi log mujhe ghoor kar dekhne lage…
“aise kya dekh rahe ho tum sab…tum log bhi chalo….”
“dedh sau lagega…”
“arey tu do sau le liyo…lekin ekdum perfect point me chhodna padega…wo kya hai
paidal chalne me energy loss ho jati hai”
“baitho phhir…”
Itwari yani ki Ganga Jamuna red light area pahuchane me mujhe yahi kuch 40-45
minutes lage aur aakhir me auto me main aur sirf wo autowala tha….
“koyi lafda toh nahi hota na idhar….”auto se utar kar maine puchha…

137
“kis chiz ka lafda bhai…sab kuch toh khulla hai…ab chaho toh video bana lo…yaha
koyi kuch nahi bolne wala…yaha ki ladkiya chahe kitne hee kapde pahan le…logo
ko wo nangi hee nazar aati hai…”
“le tu apna do sau pakad…maine toh tujhse yaha hone wale lafde ke bare me pucha
tha…lekin tum toh lawda gyan hee chodne lage…mujhe koyi fark nahi padta ki
kaun kis halat me hai”
“thik hai phhir…”paise jeb me rakhte hue us autowale ne ek taraf ishara kiya aur
bola “bas daddu ke area me kadam mat rakhna….wo us taraf uska ilaka
hai…warna katta chala dega…abhi ek hafte pahle ki hee baat hai…uske under ki ek
rakhail apne premi ke sath bhagne ki koshish me thi…daddu ne pure ilaake me
dauda-dauda kar us launde ko mara…”
“aur us rakhail ka kya hua…”
“uska toh pata nahi par kahte hai ki…daddu ne beeso aadmiyo ko ek sath uske
kamre me bhej diya…pahle toh unhone us rakhail ke jism ko khoob masla aur
phhir jaan se maar diya…isliye daddu ke ilaake me bilkul bhi mat jana…”
“acha thik hai… main yadi zinda raha toh wapas milunga…”autowale ko hath
dikhate hue maine kaha
.
Ganga-Jamuna….kitna pavitra name hai ye…pata nahi kis chutiye ne ye name is

ilaake ko de diya tha.koyi kahta hai hai ye name do nritaki(dancer) Ganga aur
Jamuna ki vazah se pada tha. Ganga-jamuna ki kya jhakkas arrangement
thi…sadak ke left side me ek line se sirf ghar hee ghar bane the ,beech-beech me
cigarette aur chay ke thele bhi the aur ghar ke samne char-paanch ladkiya…aurate
baithi hui thi ya khadi thi…aur sabki kamar zero size…kuch gori thi toh kuch
saanwali thi…par thi sab maal ki maal….us autowale ne sahi kaha tha…yaha ki
ladkiya chahe jitne bhi kapde pahan le… nazar wo nangi hee aati hai…maine ek
aur chiz jo gaur ki wo ye ki waha itne saare ghar the lekin ek bhi ghar ke saamne
koyi mard jaat ka prani nahi tha…jaha dekho sirf maal hee maal…lekin sadak ke
right side me jis taraf main chal raha tha udhar iske ulat hee mahol tha….sadak ke
right side me badhiya badi-badi dukane thi…jaha mujhe aurat jaat ki koyi prani
nazar nahi aa rahi thi…mujhe sadak ke right side me jo bhi dikhta wo ya toh koyi
ladka hota…ya koyi aadmi ya phhir koyi budha…..aur sab apne-apne kaam me
busy the…isliye maine bhi goggle lagaya aur cigarette peete hue apne kaam me
busy ho gaya…main sadak ke right side me bane ek chay wale ke paas gaya aur
bola…
“Daddu bhai kaha milenge….”
“kaun Daddu bhai…?”
“main police ka aadmi nahi hoon be…jo mujhse chhipa raha hai…mujhe toh bas
kuch kaam hai Daddu se…”
“hum kono Daddu ko nahi janat hoon…”

138
“gadfatt kahi ka…”waha se aage badhte hue maine kaha…aur next thele wale ke
paas gaya…jaha phhir se mujhe wahi sab kuch sun-ne ko mila jo ki mujhe pahle
thele wale se sunne ko mila tha yani ki wo bhi ek number ka gadfatt aadmi
tha…isliye abki baar main teesare thele wale ke paas gaya aur jate hee bola ki
main police ka aadmi hoon jisase wo thele wala thoda saham gaya aur mere bina
kuch puchhe hee bol pada…
“mazboori me ye sab karna padta hai sahib…warna kaun apni biwi ki dalali karna
chahega…”
“jurm…jurm hota hai …chahe mazboori me kyun na kiya gaya ho…chal thane…”
“humka maaf kai do sahib…”
“chal nikal hazar rupaye…”
“hazar rupaye…oo toh abhi humre paas nahi hai…”hath jodte hue usne mujhse
kaha…
“chal phhir ye bata ki Daddu kidhar rahta hai aur yadi tune bola ki kaun
daddu…toh teri biwi ko toh chodunga hee…tujhe bhi thane me lejakar
chodunga…isliye seedhe-seedhe apna muh khol aur Daddu ka address bata…”
“kaun Daddu…”
“sale dalle…”uski garden pakad kar dabate hue main bola “chal apna boriya-bistar
bandh…aaj tujhe thane lejakr police ka danda teri gand me nahi dala toh mera
name bhi ACP Arman nahi…”
“humka jaye do...” mere pair pakad kar rote hue wo bola aur tab meri fati ki kahi
koyi panga na jaye…isliye maine use uthaya aur use chup karate hue bola….
“ek shart par…main tujhe chhodunga…pahle ye bata teri biwi kaha hai…”
“kyun…”
“ab ye bhi main hee batau…chal mujhe lekar…”

.
Us thele wale ne apna thela khiska kar wahi paas me ek dusare thele wale ke paas
apna thela khada kar diya aur mujhe lekar waha se chal pada…jaha usne apna
thela laga rakha tha uske thik samne sadak ke us paar uska ghar tha…lekin wo
mujhe peeche se ghuma kar le gaya… aur ghar ke peeche wala darwaza jor-jor se
khatkhataya…
“aayi…”andar se ek aawaz aayi…
Aawaz toh normal thi lekin darwaza khulne ke baad jo maal bahar aayi wo normal
nahi thi…wo BC itni hot aur itni jyada sexy thi ki mujhe ek pal ko laga ki mera pant
me hee gir jayega…lekin maine khud ko control kiya aur andar gaya…mere andar
jaane ke baad wo aadmi jo mujhe yaha tak lekar aaya tha waha se chup chap
khisak liya…jiske baad us aurat ne andar se room band karke mujhe ek kamre me
139
aane ka ishara kiya…maine pure ghar ka jayja liya…us ghar me teen kamre
the…jisme se ek kamre ko un logo ne kitchen bana rakha tha…deewaro ki halat kafi
jarzar thi aur mujhe thoda-thoda darr bhi lagne laga tha ki kahi deewar bhasak na
jaye…par mere samne jo ek problem abhi thi wo ye ki main use ladki kahu ya
aurat…same wahi problem jo Vandana Rathi ko dekhkar hui thi…isliye andar
jakar maine cigarette jalate hue uska name puchha…
“Madhulika….”charpayi me baithte hue usne jawab diya
“huh,bakwas name…”
Main pahli baar kisi red light area me nahi aaya tha…aur jaisa ki mera past
experience tha uske hisaab se ye sab itni gumsum nahi hoti hai…jitni ki ye hone ka
dikhawa kar rahi hai…mujhe Arun ne bataya tha ki kaise jab wo randi chodne
gaya tha…toh randi ne uske wallet se pura paisa chheen liya tha….uske hisaab se
ya toh ye lawdi hoshiyari chod rahi hai ya phhir abhi-abhi dhandhe me aayi
hai…par sabse jyada jis baat ne mujhe pareshan kiya wo ye ki ye us thele wale ki
biwi bilkul nahi lagti…BC kaha wo kariya,takla 60 saal ka dikhne wala gandul aur
kaha ye 28-29 saal ki rapchik maal…upar se kitni chikni hai ye aur taiyar toh aisi
hui hai jaise ki miss world contest me participate karne wali ho…
Main wahi bistar se thodi door me baitha aur cigarette fookte hue Madhulika ko
dekhta raha…wo nihayat hee gori..chikni thi aur koyi solid perfume laga rakhi
thi…kamar ke upar usne sirf blouse pehan daal rakha tha , jo ki bahut kasa hua tha
aur kamar ke neeche ek salwar…baaki pura portion khali tha…jisase mujhe shaq
hua ki isne underwear pahni hogi ya nahi….
“chod na be…”maine khud se kaha…
“pagal hai kya…aise kaise chod du…”
“dekh lawda ,chodna hai toh chod nahi toh nikal idhar se…”
“ok”
Khud ke andar josh bharkar main chair se utha aur bistar me uske side me baith
kar uska name ek baar phhir puchha….
“Madhulika…”
“wo takla tumhara husband hai ?”
“nahi pitaji hai wo mere…”
“pitaji…? BC dalla…ek baar ka kitna leti ho”
“500 ”
“har baar paise mil jate hai ? mera matlab yadi koyi tumhari leke tumhe na
de…toh kya ukhad loge tum uska….”
140
“pitaji pahle paise lete hai aur phhir kisi ko yaha late hai…adhiktar unke dost hee
yaha aate hai,jinse unhone udhari li hoti hai….”
Maine apne hath se pahle uski gori chikni kamar kamar sahlayi aur phhir apna
hath uske salwar ke andar daal diya….
“acha ye bata…”uski salwar ke andar hath daalkar uski jaangh ko masalte hue
maine kaha “tu raat ko booking me bhi jati hai kya…booking matlab…raat bhar tu
kisi ke yaha rahi ho…”
“nahi…”
“booking me chalegi…”
“mere pitaji se puchho…”
“is sabki shuruat kaise hui….matlab first time tune …kaise….kaha….tu samajh rahi
hai….”uski salwar kholkar utarte hue maine puchha aur jaisa ki mera shaq tha
usne underwear nahi pahni thi….salwar utarne ke baad maine uski blouse bhi utar
di….
“sach-sach batana …police me hoon main…yadi jhooth bola toh jail me daal
dunga…”
“mujhe ab koyi fark nahi padta ki…kaun kaha dal raha hai…aur aapne pahli dafa
ka puchha hai toh bata deti hoon….wo raat ka samay tha jab mere pitaji apne
dosto ke sath ghar me jua khel rahe the…wo aksar aisa karte the…lekin us din jab
unke paas paise khatm ho gaye toh unhone udhari me kuch paise apne dosto se
liye….aur wo udhari ke paise bhi jue me haar gaye…jiske baad unhone mujhe daav
par rakh diya….us samay main andar khana bana rahi thi…meri toh rooh kanp
gayi thi ye sunkar….maine suna ki kaise mere pitaji apne dosto ke beech meri boli
laga rahe the…kisi ne pach sau kaha toh kisi ne ek hazar aur phhir ant me do hazar
me mere pitaji ne mujhe ek raat ke liye apne dosto ke hawale kar diya…..”
“ye le…”Madhulika ke hath me condom dete hue main bola….
Madhulika ne bina samay gawaye mere hath se condom ka packet liya aur muh se
condom ke packet ko fad kar condom mere lund ko pahna diya….jiske baad maine
use upar uthaya aur uski choochiyo ko dabane laga….main jab tak uske doodh
dabata raha wo bina kisi harqat ke waisi ki waisi jis postion me thi, wahi jami
rahi….mano koyi laash ho, BC koyi effect tak nahi…isliye maine kaskar , uski
choochiya dabayi…
“chuuuusna bhi hai…? uska charge alag se dena padega….”
“chusna….?”
“maine pucha ki aapka lund chusna hai ya nahi….lund chusne ka 200 alag se
dena padega…aur mujhe dena padega….”

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“tera baap mujhse…do hazar lekar baitha hai aur tu alag se do sau legi….abey
jitney paise maine tere baap ko diye hai…utne me main tujhe char din aakar
chodunga….aur tujhe chusaunga bhi….chal baith neeche aur choos…”
“pure Ganga-Jamuna me lund choosne ka alag charge lagta hai….aap kahi bhi
puchh lo….”
“mere paas ab itna hee kaam bacha hai ki main pure Ganga-Jamuna me lund
chuswane ka rate puchhu…”Maine uska jabda kaskar pakda aur dabate hue
bola…“pure Ganga-jamuna me koyi kisi raand ko panch sau ke badle do hazar nahi
deta hai….isliye chup-chap neeche jhuk aur choosna shuru kar…warna pel-pel ke
muh aur gand aise kar dunga ki dono me se kaun kya hai… pahchan nahi payegi
aur ye sochne ki bhool bilkul mat karna ki maine tujhse tere past ke bare me
puchha toh mujhe tujhse koyi humdardi hogi…mujhe na toh kisi ke humdardi ki
zaroorat hai aur na hee main kisi ko humdardi dikhata hoon…kyunki mujhe
maloom hai ki is-se kuch nahi hota…aur na hee kuch badalta hai…isliye is bhool
me bilkul mat rahna ki mujhe tujhpar koyi daya aa rahi hai…isliye neeche jhuk aur
thook laga kar chatna shuru kar… chal baith…neeche…”
Vivash hokar Madhulika neeche baithi aur mere lund ko ek baar me hee gapp kar
gayi….jiske baad usne mere lund ko choosne ka jo silsila chalu kiya wo bahut der
tak chalta raha…wo jab mere lund ko chooste-chooste thak jati toh mere lund ko
beech-beech me bahar nikal deti aur hath se lund ki chamdi aage peechhe karke
saans lene lagti thi….
“thook kar chat…nahi aisa mat kar…”
Maine Madhulika ke sar ko peeche se pakda aur uske baal kheenchkar apna lund
uske honth aur gaal par ragadne laga….aur aisa karte-karte mere lund ne uske
gaal me hee paani chhod diya….
“jaa, apna muh dhokar aa aur ek glass paani mere liye bhi lekar aa aur nangi hee
rahna…warna tere baap ko arthi par lita dunga…bhoolna mat ki main ek police
officer hoon….Sali randi…ab ja na…mujhe ghoor ke kyun dekh rahi hai….tujhe
pata bhi nahi hoga ki main kitna frustrated hoon…mera vash chale toh prithvi se
tumhari jaat hee mita doon….”
Paanch minute tak wo room se attached jhat barabar bathroom me apna chehra
saaf karte rahi aur phhir bathroom se nikal kar mere liye paani lene chali
gayi…Waise toh wo shuru-shuru me zinda laash thi lekin jab se maine use gaali
dena shuru kiya tha uski aankh nam hone lagi thi….shayad use mere shabd kaante
ki bhati chubh rahe the…wo nangi hee apni gand matkate hue pani lene gayi aur
jaise hee wo matke se paani nikalne ke liye jhuki uski gand khulkar mere samne
aayi jiske karan mujhse raha nahi gaya aur maine daud kar use peeche se pakad
liya….
“paani rahne de….”uski choot me ungali dalte hue maine kaha “chal ek baar phhir
se choos kar khada kar….”
“ab mujhse nahi hoga…mujhe ab ghin aa rahi hai…”

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“chal phhir nikal mere do hazar rupaye…”uske pond me ek thappad marte hue
maine kaha… “mere paise nikal ya phhir mera pakad ke muh me
le…warna….maar-maar ke laal kar dunga…”
Maine back to back do-teen thaqppad uski gori pond me jad diye…jisase wo sisakne
lagi.pahle toh mujhe laga ki uski siskiya wo wali siskiya hai lekin baad me pata
chala ki wo toh rone wali siskiya thi aur tabhich mujhe ladkiyo ke bare me ek chiz
maloom chali ki ladkiya maar nahi sah sakti….wo bahut nazuk hoti hai…humare
tattoo ki tarah aur unhe sambhal kar rakhna padta hai….warna unki halat
Madhulika jaisi ho sakti hai…
Madhulika aur maar sahan nahi kar saki aur paani ka glass gusse se neeche palat
kar wapas meri taraf palti aur neeche baithkar gusse me jaldi-jaldi mera lund
choosne lagi….itni tezi se ki paanch minute pahle salami de chukka mera lund
phhir se salami dene ke liye taiyar hone laga…Madhulika jitni tez gati ke sath mere
lund ko choos rahi thi…main bhi utni tezi ke sath uski choot me apni ungali andar-
bahar kar raha tha….humari gati badhti gayi aur hum dono siskiya lene
lage….mera lund chuste waqt ek do baar Madhulika ne apne daant bhi gada
diye…lekin mere andar abhi itna josh tha ki mujhe koyi fark hee nahi pad raha
tha….maine Madhulika ko roka aur use wahi matke ke paas zameen par lita kar
uske upar chadh gaya….lekin maine apna lund uski choot me turant nahi
dala…main bahut der tak apne lund ko uske choot ke muhane par rakhkar ragadta
raha…beech-beech me ek-do baar main apne lund ka thoda sa hissa uski choot me
dal deta lekin phhir turant nikal leta aur wapas uski choot ke muhane par ragadne
lagta….Madhulika zameen me pade-pade ab angadayi lene lagi thi aur meri
aankho me dekh kar mujhe ishara kar rahi thi ki main uski bur faad du…lekin
maine aisa nahi kiya aur uske doodh dabate hue usase puchha….
“tum us raand ko janti ho kya….jiski maut pichhale hafte hue thi aur jise Daddu ne
mara tha”
Mere is sawal par Madhulika buri tarah chauk gayi aur mujhe ektak niharne
lagi….uski vaasana ki sari angdayi mano mere ek prashn se samapt ho gayi
thi…wo ab wapas zinda laash ban gayi thi…aur kisi zinda laash ki bhati mujhe
ghoore ja rahi thi….
“aise kya dekh rahi hai…”Mahulika ke dono doodh dabate hue maine puchha
“uska name Kaamini tha… aap usko jante the…”
“ek number ki randi thi Sali…ek bechare sharif launde ko apne changul me fasa kar
jaan se marwa diya bechare ko….maine news paper me padha tha ki use Daddu ke
aadmiyo ne mara tha….kya ye sach hai…”uske muh me apni ungaliya dalte hue
main bola aur Madhulika ko ishara kiya ki meri hath ki ungaliyo ko thik wo waise
hee choose jaise mere lund ko choos rahi thi….
Maine Madhulika ke upar chadhe-chadhe hee apni pant utar kar neeche khiska di
aur shirt utar kar wahi bagal me fek diya…ab main aur Madhulika ek-dusare ke
jism ke direct contact me the aur mera jism is samay vasana ki aag me dhadhak
raha tha….Madhulika bhale hee ek veshya thi par meri harqate use vaasna ke
sagar me dubo rahi thi…jise main uske kanpan hote jism se mahsoos kar sakta
tha….maine apna lund wapas uski chut ke upar rakha aur Madhulika ke pure
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nange badan ko apne sharir se dabane laga jiske karan uske sharir me phhir se
sihran uthi aur wo lambi-lambi saanse lene lagi….maine apna ek hath neeche
lejakar uski choot ko apni ungaliyo se phailaya aur apna lund chhed me rakhkar
puri taqat ke sath dhakka mara….jisase ek bahut he manoranjak aawaz pure
vatavaran me gunj uthi….
“Daddu hai kaun….? Aur kya role hai uska Ganga-Jamuna me…”apna lund nikal
kar uski choot ke muhane se sparsh karate hue maine Madhulika se puchha aur
wapas jor se dhakka mara…
“Dadduuuu…yaha ka sher hai…adhiktar aurato ki jismfaroshi me uska bhi hath

rahta hai aur har din jo aurat jitna kamati hai usme se 20 % wo khud leta hai….”
“tum log use paise kyun dete ho…matlab ki gand tum marwao aur gulaab jamun
wo khaye….aisa kyun…”
“iske badle me wo hume police se protect karta hai…”
“achchha…”uski choot me apne dhakko ki raftaar tez karte hue main bola “aur jo
log use apni kamayi ka 20 % nahi dete unke sath wo kya karta hai….”
“Itwari thane ka daroga uske relation me kuch lagta hai…isliye jo log use paisa
nahi dete wo daroga uske ghar me chhapa mar deta hai aur dus guna jyada vasool
karta hai….isliye sabhi Daddu ko uska hissa pyar se de dete hai….”
“Daddu…. dikhne me….. mere se….. jyada smart hai kya…”Madhulika ki choot me
lagatar apna lund dalte hue hee maine puchha….
“nahi….”
“usne tujhe kabhi choda hai…”
“ye aap kyun puchh rahe hai…”
“tu jawab dena…”
“Daddu ne mujhe bahut baar choda hai…uska beta bhi aksar aakar apni aag bhuja
jata hai…”
“Kaamini ke bare me thoda aur bata….matlab ki uske sath-sath kya-kya kiya

Daddu ne….”
Maine apna lund Madhulika ki choot se nikala aur use wahi zameen par ulta letne
ke liye kaha….lekin wo boli ki use zameen me dukh raha hai….isliye hum dono
waha zameen se uthkar dusare room me rakhi charpayi par gaye….Madhulika ulti
late gayi aur apni tango ko bina mere bole hee faila di…yaha tak ki usne apne dono
hatho se apni pond ko failaya aur apni gand me lund dalne ka mujhe khula nyota
diya….

144
“that’s the spirit ,ye hoti hai asli randi…jo bina bole sab samajh jaye…Vandana
Rathi ko bhi ek din aise hee chodunga…uski toh main gand faad dalunga….bas
kuch din wo aur aish kar le….”
Madhulika ki is harqat ko dekhkar main muskuraya aur kood kar uske upar ja
baitha….wo ab bhi apne hath se apne gand ko failaye hue thi….maine pahle uski
gand ko ungali se sahlaya aur phhir apni ungali uski gand me daal di…jisase wo
thodi jhijhak uthi….
“lund dalne se pahle thoda thook dena…dard kam hota hai….”
“oil nahi hai kya…”Madhulika ki gand me apni ungali andar-bahar karte hue
maine puchha….
“hai na…waha dusare room me rakha hai…”
“toh ja.. jakar lekar aa…warna aise hee ghusa dunga”
Madhulika wapas seedhi hui aur bistar se uthkar dusare room se oil lene jaane lagi
lekin tabhi maine uske pichhwade me jhapad mara…wo bina kuch bole dusare
room me gayi aur tel ka botal mere hath me dekar…wapas charpayi par ulta let
gayi..maine pahle tel uski kamar par giraya aur masalte hue tel uski gand tak le
gaya….
“tune Kaamini ke bare me jyada nahi bataya….”apna lund Madhulika ki gand se

connect karte hue main bola….
“meri saheli thiiiiiiiiiiiiiii….aaaaiiiiiss”
“teri saheli…”chaukte hue maine apna lund Madhulika ki gand ke andar hee
rakha…. “kaisi saheli thi…achchhi wali ? ”
“haan…”
“wo bhi tere type full raand thi kya….”
“aap zinda logo ko izzat nahi dete…kam se kam mare logo ko toh do…aur koyi bhi
ladki apni marzi se randi nahi banti…ya toh wo mazboori me banti hai ya phhir
gharwalo ke dabav me aakar use randi banna padta hai…aapko kya pata ki
mazboori kise kahte hai…aap bade ghar me paida hue…achchhe school me
padhe…phhir college karke naukri ki ya phhir naukri nahi bhi ki toh bhi aapko
khilane ke liye aapke maa-baap hai…unki beshumir daulat hai….lekin humare
paas ye sab nahi hai….hum apna jism bechkar apna aur apne pariwar ka gujara
chalate hai….kabhi bhookhe rahe ho ? sari samajhdari gand me ghus jati hai ki kya
sahi hai aur kya galat…”
“ bitch please…Aradhna ke case me main teen din thane me bhookha band tha….
anyway toh iska matlab teri dost bhi full raand thi…teri tarah”apna lund
Madhulika ki gand se nikal kar maine kaha aur phhir jor lagakar wapas uski gand
me dal diya….jiske baad Madhulika ki gand marne ka maine jo silsila chalu kiya
wo bahut der tak chala…

145
“Daddu ke bete ne use veshya banaya tha….”jab maine final stroke uski gand me
markar us-se chipak kar let gaya toh wo boli “wo Kaamini ko apni rakhail bana
kar rakhna chahta tha…lekin uske hee ek dost ko Kaamini se mohabbat ho gayi aur
wo Kaamini ko lekar yaha se bhag gaya….”
“wo bhagne me kamyab ho gaya tha…? Phhir Daddu ne use kaise dhoondha…”
“maine bataya tha ki wo kaha chhipi hai….”
“wooow…kahani me twist…lekin kyun”uthkar khada hote hue maine puchha aur

apna lund uske honth se touch kara diya….jisase wo baukhlayi aur gussa bhi
hui…..lekin kuch boli nahi….
“bata na…tune apni saheli ko kyun faswaya….jabki wo yaha se nikal chuki

thi….”ek baar aur apna lund uske muh se touch karake maine puchha aur is baar
wo pahle se jyada baukhla gayi….par pahle ki tarah abki baar bhi wo kuch nahi
boli….bas apna muh sikod kar dusari taraf kar liya
“Daddu aur uske gunde mujhe jaan se marne ki dhamki de rahe the….pitaji ko toh
unhone bahut mara bhi…”
“kabhi apne baap se badla lene ka khayal tere mann me nahi aaya ya phhir
bhagwan se ”pant upar chadhate hue maine Madhulika ki taraf dekha aur apne
pant ki jeb se hazar ka ek patta nikal kar uski taraf fek diya….
“main unhe ab apna pita nahi manti aur bhagwan se kaisi shikayat….bhagwan ne
mujhe veshya banne ke liye nahi kaha….”uthkar baithte hue wo meri taraf dekh
kar boli…
“par bhagwan ne tujhe is ilaake me paida toh kiya….?”
“par mujhe ab bhi bhagwan par bharosa hai…kam se kam mere sath wo toh nahi
hua jo Kaamini ke sath hua…main zinda hoon…mere pita bhi zinda hai aur hum
dono ko do waqt ka khana mil raha hai…isase jyada sochane ki meri koyi khwaish
nahi hai….”
“tu zinda hai kyunki tujhe abhi tak waisa aashiq nahi mila jaisa ki Kaamini ko
mila tha…aur kabhi mile bhi toh uske sath mat bhagna aur bhagwan par bharosa
karna chhod de….kyunki ant me , bhagwan koyi madad nahi karne wala…infact
mujhe kabhi-kabhi toh aisa lagta hai ki bhagwan hai hee nahi”pant ki jeb me hath
daal kar maine ek aur hazar ka note nikala aur charpayi par rakhkar Madhulika
ke doodh dabate hue bola “kal se full taiyar hokar rahna…main phhir
aaunga…have a sexy day….”
.
Thodi Si himmat...thodi Si chalaki aur thoda sa jhooth... Aur tum wo paa loge jiski
tumne kabhi kalpana tak nahi ki thi…par main yaha kyun aaya tha ? aur ye sab
kyun kar raha tha..? toh jawab hai Gun… is duniya me bahut mahan aviskar aur
aviskarak hue lekin personally mera aisa manna hai ki Gun un sabme sabse
mahan hai…bilkul meri tarah ! bole toh koyi dikhawa nahi, koyi bhed-bhav
nahi…pelna hai toh pelna hai, phhir chahe samne wala peon ho ya prime
minister..wo utna zakhm prime minister ko bhi degi jitna ki peon ko…bole toh No
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Discrimination ! aur Gun ka yahi attitude apun ko bahut pasand aaya aur apun
idhar aaya.
Madhulika ke ghar se nikal kar main wapas sadak par chalne laga…Madhulika se
vida lete waqt maine us-se Daddu ke bare me aur bhi bahut kuch jaan li thi…jaise
ki Daddu ka ghar kaha hai…uska adda kaha hai….wo mujhe yaha kab
milega….wagerah-wagerah…jiske anusar Daddu raat me Ganga-Jamuna ki sabse
badi randi se milne aata hai….jiska khud ka ek chakla hai aur uske under me 20-22
randiya kaam karti hai….Madhulika ne mujhe bataya ki log use Ajmeri bai kahte
the…kyun kahte the…ye use nahi maloom tha….Ajmeri bai Ganga-Jamuna ki sabse
badi randi hone ke sath-sath sabse badi dalal bhi thi…aur sirf kuch khas logo ke
sath bistar garam karti thi…jinme se ek Daddu bhi tha….
Maine ghadi me time dekha….abhi dopahar ke ek baj rahe the aur Daddu se milne
ke liye mujhe raat tak ka intezaar karna tha isliye maine wahi rahkar Daddu aur
Ajmeri bai ke bare me kuch aur puchh-tachh ki….aur main jis-se bhi un dono ke
bare me puchhta wo mujhe ghoor kar dekhne lagte…adhiktar logo ne toh mere
muh pe mana kar diya ki na toh wo Ajmeri bai ko jaante hai aur na hee Daddu
ko….lekin waha kuch aise bhi the…jinhone paiso ki lalach me mujhe bahut kuch un
dono ke bare me bata diya tha…jiske according….Ajmeri bai 22 saal ki thi jab uska
premi use yaha bechne aaya tha….us samay wo pregnant thi…tab Daddu ki dhak
utni nahi thi , wo bas Ganga-Jamuna ka mamooli gunda tha…jo randiyo ko chodne
ke jugad me Itwari me ghoomte rahta tha aur wahi ek roj Daddu ne Ajmeri Bai ko
dekha….jiske baad kya hua iski kahani mujhe nahi maloom….par Daddu aur
Ajmeri bai ke milaap ne jaha Daddu ko is Ganga-Jamuna ka maalik bana diya tha
wahi Ajmeri bai ko sabse badi raand hone ka khitab mil gaya tha….kuch log toh ye
bhi kahte hai ki Ajmeri bai ke aashiqo me kayi political leader bhi hai ,jinki vazah
se Daddu upar chadhta gaya….isliye maine Daddu se milne se pahle Ajmeri se
milne
ka socha lekin Jis tarah Daddu raat ko hee Ganga-Jamuna me aata hai…usi tarah
Ajmeri bai ka kotha bhi raat me hee khulta tha….isliye sham ko 7 baje tak main
pure Itwari me ghoomte hue mahol tadta raha aur phhir sham hote hee Ajmeri bai
ke kothe ki taraf chal diya….
.
Ajmeri bai ke kothe ka haal kafi acha tha…waha saaf-safai thi aur pure kothe ko
Ajmeri ne aise saja kar rakha tha jaise ki waha koyi function hone wala ho….kothe
me main gate se andar jaane ke baad ek bada sa hall tha jaha ek bahut bada sofa
rakha hua tha jis par shayad Ajmeri bai baithkar T.V. dekh rahi thi….main Kothe
ke main gate se andar gaya aur mujhe dekhte hee Ajmeri ne apni chakliyo ko
aawaz mari….jiske baad wo sab waha turant aakar mere samne khadi hokar
mujhe dekhne lagi…
“aage ki jo do hai unke 600 …beech me jo paanch hai unke 1000 aur peechhe
wali teeno ke 1500 . Richa kaha rah gayi re…wo manager abhi tak uske sath busy
hai kya….sala lagta hai bank ka pura paisa aaj uda ke hee manega….ek ghante se
meri bachchi ko band karke rakha hua hai….jab wapas aaye toh double charge
lena…bachchiya shikayat bhi karti hai ki sala , wo Manager jor-jor se dabata
hai….”
Maine Ajmeri bai ko dekha…pahle toh mujhe yakin hee nahi hua ki yahi Ajmeri Bai
hai…maine toh soch rakha tha ki ye 40-45 saal ki koyi aurat hogi…jiska pet, gand
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ki tarah bahar nikla hoga aur wo muh me paan daba ke randiyo ke maafiq dalali
karti hogi lekin jab maine use dekha toh mujhe yakin nahi hua….uski umra
Vandana Rathi ke barabar thi…ya phhir usase teen-char saal jyada….par saali ne
kya maintain karke rakha tha khud ko…isne toh Madhulika…Vandana Rathi yaha
tak ki khoobsurti ke mamle me Nisha ko bhi peeche chhod diya tha….kya perfect
figure tha Ajmeri ka…upar se baby face…matlab ki shakl dekh kar lag hee nahi
raha tha ki wo ek veshya hai….isiliye sala Daddu itna upar pahuch gaya….
“kamal hai…maine toh socha tha ki Ajmeri Bai….paan ki peek marte hue gand jaisi
shakl wali 50 saal ki budhiya hogi….lekin ye toh kayamat nikli bidu….”Ajmeri bai
ko upar se neeche tak dekh kar maine socha….aur sirf socha hee kyunki lund ko toh
main Madhulika ke yaha chhod aaya tha…isliye mere paas siway sochne ke kuch
nahi tha….
“kya re….kaun si pasand aayi….”mujhe shant khada dekh wo boli. uski aawaz
sunkar mujhe bahut bada jhatka laga…kyunki jaha ek taraf wo tanatan rapchik
maal thi, wahi uski aawaz bahut kharab thi….Arun ki aawaz se bhi kharab.“Sali ,
muh me lawda le-le ke aawaz kaisi ho gayi hai iski….”
“kisko chodega re….”Ajmeri ne phhir apna muh fada
Maine ek baar waha mauzood sabhi randiyo ko dekha aur phhir Ajmeri bai ki taraf
apna rookh karke bola“tujhe…rate bata…”
“salaaaa…kutta…mujhe chodega…tere jaise na jaane kitne laundo ka main apne

andar le leti hoon…aur tu mujhe chodega….”
“kya baat hai Ajmeri bai….suna hai yaha ki sabse badi randi hai tu…”Use uksate
hue maine kaha
“isko bharo re aur itna marna ki Itwari me kabhi wapas na aaye….”
Ajmeri Bai ne jor se aawaz mari….jiske baad teen-char mustande daudkar bahar se
andar aaye aur mujhe utha kar bahar le jaane lage…..
“Ajmeri….teri aawaz bahut kharab hai…Sali randi, jab chillati hai toh aisa lagta
hai jaise ki gadhe ki gand me danda daal diya gaya ho…thoda kam lauda choosa
kar…ya phhir mera lawda choos le….Sali randi…burchatti…”
Main itna hee bol paya tha ki un logo ne mujhe andar se lakar bahar patak
diya…pahle toh unhone mujhe bahar patka aur phhir mera collar pakad kar mujhe
kheechte hue kahi le jane lage…..
“Daddu ke paas le ja rahe ho na…actually main usi se milne aaya tha…Ajmeri toh
sirf ek jariya tha….chalo Daddu ke paas…”maine kaha
Aur mere aisa kahne ke baad jisne mera collar pakad rakha tha usne mera collar
chhod diya aur mujhse puchha ki main Daddu ko kaise janta hoon
“Daddu se bahut badi deal karni hai….par koyi address nahi bata raha tha Daddu
ka…isliye ye sab karna pada…”apna collar aur shirt sahi karte hue maine kaha aur
goggle pahan kar ek cigarette left side me dabaya….
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“lighter hai kya….”cigarette ko left side se right side me shift karte hue maine
puchha….jiske jawab me unme se ek ne machis nikali aur ek teeli jalakar cigarette
ke paas le aaya….
“sorry…”machis ki teeli ko fook markar bujhate hue maine kaha “Shri Arman, sirf
lighter se cigarette jalata hai…ego problem…anyway, chalo Daddu ke paas”
Iske baad unme se kisi ne mujhe hath tak nahi lagaya par wo mujhe gher kar chal
rahe the…taaki main bhag na jaun….thodi der tak paidal chalne ke baad main
Daddu ke adde me pahuch gaya….
“kya hua be…tum log yaha…Ajmeri ne bheja kya….”apne aadmiyo ko waha apne
adde par dekhkar Daddu ne unse puchha…jispar ek apne hath bandhkar thoda
jhukte hue bola…
“bhai…ye ladka…Ajmeri behan ke sath lafda kar raha tha aur unhi ke kahne par
main isko yaha laya hoon…”
“isne Ajmeri ke sath lafda kiya aur tum log ise marne ke bajay mere paas lekar
aaye ho…”
“i can explain it…Daddu bhai….”apna hath upar uthakar beech me main bola…
“actually main yaha aapke liye hee aaya tha matlab aapse milne aaya tha”
“mil liya na, ab chal mar…”bolte hue Daddu ne apne pichhwade me hath dala aur
desi katta nikal kar mere upar taan diya….
“dus hazar per piece dunga is type ke katte ke….”
“ dus hazaaaaar….”
Dus hazar ek desi katte ka rate sunkar Daddu ke hosh udd gaye…aur uske hosh aur
udate hue maine boli aur badha di….
“acha… 15000 per piece….ab thik…”
“15000 har desi katte ke liye…chal aaja….aaja, baith-baith”
Daddu ne gun neeche ki aur mujhe wahi ek chair par baithne ka aamantran
diya….maine ek cigarette apne muh me fasaya aur apne jeb se lighter nikal kar
cigarette jalate hue wahi Daddu ke samne baith gaya…
“jab tere paas lighter tha toh humse kyun mang raha tha….”jo char mustando
mujhe utha kar yaha laye the…unme se ek ne jawab diya….mera matlab puchha…
“wo toh main tum logo ki aukat check kar raha tha…anyway..”saamne palat kar
Daddu se maine kaha “Daddu bhai…kitne Desi Katte ka intezaam kar sakte ho…”
“kitne chahiye tumhe….”
“yahi koyi chalis katte….”

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“chalis…”
“hmmm…no. make it hundred. Sau katte. Sunne me bhi achchha lagta hai aur
calculation me bhi ”
“payment kab doge….”
“delivery do baar me do alag-alag jagah par hogi…50-50 ke set me. vehicle humara
hoga, bas tum time aur jagah mujhe bata dena ,har delivery ke pahle payment mil
jayega..”
“karoge kya itne katte ka…”
“everyone needs a mask, you have yours…I have mine”
“kyaaaaaa….”
“ab main tumse puchhu ki tum itne katte laoge kaha se toh kya tum mujhe bata
doge….”
“nahi…”
“exactly, bas main bhi nahi bata sakta….”muskurate hue maine kaha….jiske baad
Daddu bhi muskura utha…
Maine Daddu ke yaha se sample ke taur par 15000 dekar ek katta liya aur salam-
dua karke waha se bahar nikla….mere peeche-peeche Daddu ke aadmi bhi nikle par
thodi door tak aane ke baad wo laut kar wapas chale gaye….meri is samay fat toh
bahut rahi thi ki kahi Daddu ya uske aadmi mujhe peeche se goli na maar de…par
kyunki jaisa maine pahle bhi kaha hai ki… Thodi Si himmat...thodi Si chalaki aur
thoda sa jhooth... Aur tum wo paa loge jiski tumne kabhi kalpana tak nahi ki thi,
upar se is samay main NH-6 ke Thug ke kirdar me tha…isliye main darne ke
bawzood peeche palta aur Thug ke kirdar se pura nyay karte hue Daddu ke
aadmiyo ki taraf cigarette peekar role me dhua chhodne laga….
“dhua chhodna band kar be…warna kahi in logo ki khisak gayi toh tujhe hee dhue
me na tabdil kar de….kaise-kaise kaam kar raha hoon main…kya choda Madhulika
ko aur kaise Daddu ko chodu banaya….use kya maloom ki mujhe sirf ek desi katta
chahiye tha….taki main apne sapno ko saakar kar saku….abhi tak mera pair
kaanp raha hai…sala Daddu ne jaan se nahi mara wahi bahut hai…yaha se jakar
do peg marunga aur chup chap so jaunga…yadi neend aayi toh…pura rom-rom
dark e mare kaanp raha hai…thank you bhagwan. Aisich sath bane rahna ,last
time ke mafiq dhokha mat dena aur phhir dekhna ki kaise main in sabki leta
hoon….”
.
Ganga-jamuna se main raat ko 11 baje ke karib River View Colony pahucha…aaj

din bhar ki bhag-daud ke karan main kafi thak chuka tha aur aalas itna aa raha
tha ki mujhe khana khane ka bhi mann nahi kiya…waise normal day me meri
energy is time pe top pe hoti hai hai par kyunki ye normal day nahi tha isliye mere
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sath kuch bhi normal nahi ho raha tha…siway ek chiz ke…ki baki din ki tarah
mujhe aaj bhi neend nahi aa rahi thi…main bahut der tak bistar par leta
raha…sone ki koshish karta raha…lekin meri laakh koshisho ke bawzood main
sone me safal nahi ho paya isliye uthkar baith gaya….aur jaise hee main uthkar
baitha mere side me rakha katta mere pair se touch hua….katte ko dekhkar mera
matha thanka .maine katta uthaya aur daudkar apne flat ki chhat par gaya….
“yadi koyi mujh par attack karega toh main…pahle yaha chhup kar use goli
marunga…aur phhir yaha chhipkar…phhir chhat par let kar chalte hue chhat ke
dusare hisse me jaunga aur usi dauran gun ko dobara load karunga…aur peechhe
ki taraf mauzood logo ko maar dunga…dichkyooon….lekin yadi hawai hamla hua
toh ? idea …main turant kood kar pahle E-5 me jaunga..phhir E-4 me…phhir E-3 me
au aise karte-karte colony ke bahar nikal jaunga….let’s make it happen”
Maine katta wahi zameen par rakha aur chhat ke ekdum kinare par khada hokar
mere flat ki chhat aur R.Rathi ke flat ki chhat ke beech kitni doori hai iska andaza
lagane laga…
“10 feet…nahi actually 8 feet hogi…9 bhi ho sakti hai…ek min.” Vandana Rathi ke
flat me torch markar maine kaha “8.5 feet correct… but I think 8.46 would be more
correct … done 8.46. ek kaam karta hoon us side se daudkar yaha aaunga aur
phhir ek long jump….yess…yahi ek tarika hai hawai hamle se bachne ka…chal
Arman…3.0 ”
Main apne flat ki chhat me peechhe gaya aur aankh band karke kuch der tak khud
ko utsahit karta raha…phhir maine apni aankh kholi aur gand-fad tez daud kar
apne chhat se Vandana Rathi ki chhat ki taraf chhalang maar di…main apne chhat
se Vandana Rathi ke chhat par pahuchne hee wala tha, main bas pahuch hee
chukka tha lekin sala meri jump kam pad gayi…aur main chhati ke bal seedhe
chhat ke kinare se takraya…aur takra kar seedhe neeche gira…
“hey Arun kya chal raha hai…sab log chhat se kood kyu rahe hai, kahi Gautam ke
baap ne gunde toh nahi bheje hostel me…”
“nahi be, wo toh shart lagi hai ki jo yaha se neeche koodkar wapas seedhiyo ke
raaste se hota hua mujhtak pahle aayega use 1000 ka inaam diya jayega…”
“chal phhir, hazar rupaye lekar rakh…aaj daru peene bar chalenge”apna jeans
utar kar Arun ko pakdate hue maine kaha…
“abey ab tu ye race nahi jeet sakta , wo sab bahut pahle kood gaye hai…”
“main gate andar se locked hai aur chabhi mere us jeans me hai…neeche ja aur tab
tak gate mat kholna jab tak main gate ke paas pahuch na jaun…”
“wow…great. Par sambhal ke…neeche bahut bada gaddha hai…do toh usme se
nikal bhi nahi paye hai…”
“ Deeper I fall, stronger I’ll rise…”itna bolkar main chhat se neeche kood gaya…
Par ye kaise ? main toh yaha hoon hee nahi…ye toh past ki memories hai… kyunki
main chhat se neeche kood nahi raha , main neeche gir raha hoon….
Aur jab ye hua…. yani ki jab main seene ke bal chhat se takra kar neeche gira toh
mere muh se tarah-tarah ki aawaze nikalne lagi…jisme main kabhi dard se
karahta toh kabhi maze lekar hasta…sach batau toh mujhe kafi maza aa raha
tha…mujhe meri chhati me jalan mahsoos hui…mujhe aisa laga jaise ki meri chhati
chhil gayi ho….aur aisa hua bhi tha kyunki jab maine apne chhati me apna hath
lagaya toh mera shirt khoon ki vazah se geela tha aur…aur …. aur jyada geela ho
raha tha, par mujhe sabse bada dar jis baat ka tha wo ye ki kahi Vandana Rathi
yaha na aa jaye…waise uske pure flat ki light band thi aur mere is karname ke
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baad bhi uske pure flat ki light band hee thi…jisase maine anuman lagaya ki
Vandana Rathi ab bhi so rahi hai aur mere is karname ki use koyi bhanak tak nahi
lagi hai …..maine khoon se lagatar bheeg rahi apni chhati ko sahlaya jiske baad
mujhe aisa laga jaise mere seene me aag lagi ho..kyunki chhat se seene ke bal
takrane ke karan mera seena buri tarah chhil chukka tha aur mujhe kafi jalan type
ki feeling aa rahi thi par thodi der baad wo jalan band ho gayi…maine wapas apna
seena sahlaya par abki baar mujhe kuch mahsoos hee nahi hua, mujhe aisa laga
jaise main apni nahi balki kisi aur ki chhati sahla raha hoon….yani ki meri puri
chhati ab sunn pad gayi thi….main thodi der tak wahi pada raha aur phhir kohni
ko zameen me tikakar uthne ki koshish ki….lekin main uth nahi paya aur wapas
wahi gir gaya aur tab mujhe chhat par thode der pahle ki hui training yaad
aayi…jisme main kohni ke bal zameen me ghisat-ghisat kar chhat ke ek hisse se
dusare hisse ki taraf gaya tha….
Maine zameen par apni dono kohni tikayi aur ghisat-ghisat kar aage badhne
laga….isme mujhe mushqil toh ho rahi thi…par utni jyada bhi nahi….kyunki
Vandana Rathi ne pure flat ke charo taraf chhote-chhote ghas lagwa rakhe
the…jisase mujhe zameen par ghisatne me thodi sahuliyat mil rahi thi….main aise
hee zameen ki mitti khata hua Vandana Rathi ke gate ke neeche se sarak kar bahar
aaya aur aise hee zameen ki mitti khate hue ghisat-ghisat kar apne flat ke gate ke
neeche se andar aaya…aur apne flat ki boundary ke andar aane ke baad main
deewar ke sahare tik kar baitha aur bas wahi baitha raha….kyunki waha tak aate-
aate meri puri energy khatm ho chuki thi…mere pura sharir paseene aur khoon se
bheeg chukka tha aur ab mujhme itni bhi taqat nahi thi ki main hil bhi paun…mera
gala bahut sookh raha tha….mera mann kiya ki Varun ko call kar du…lekin phhir
socha ki mere fans kya sochenge…isliye maine Varun ko call nahi kiya…
“paa….ni….ab raat bhar yahi rahna padega….kya main marne wala hoon…”
“pata nahi, mujhe aas-paas koyi yamdut toh nahi dikh raha….”
“waise achi koshish thi…”
“haan…kal phhir karenge….”
“Good Night ,Version 2.0”
“Good Night….3.0”
.
Subah main jab utha toh dekha mere shirt ka saamne wala pura hissa khoon ki
vazah se laal ho chuka tha aur zameen me ghisatne ki vazah se meri kohni chhil
chuki thi par sabse important baat jo is samay thi wo ye ki mujhe bahut jor se pyas
lagi thi…meri halat ab is samay aisi thi ki yadi ab mujhe turant pani nahi mila toh
main bas mar hee jaunga…
Maine jis deewar ke sahare tik kar kal ki puri raat guzar di thi…usi deewar ko
pakad kar main utha aur langdate langdate apne flat ke andar aakar pahle toh pet
bhar paani piya aur pani peene ke baad baad bathroom me pani se bhari balti ke
paas baithkar apna pura sar us balti me daal diya….
“sala…gand hee fat gayi meri…main kya ban gaya hoon…is-se acha toh BC wo
katta apni kanpatti pe rakh kar trigger daba doon…laanat hai aisi zindagi
pe….”thodi der baad balti se apna sar bahar nikalkar main bola aur bathroom se
bahar aakar farsh par hafte hue let gaya…..
.
Kal raat ke karname ki vazah se mera seena bahut jagah se chhil gaya tha aur
dard toh tha hee…isliye maine do-teen din room me rest karna hee behtar
samjha…par phhir maine socha ki main room me pure din karunga kya…tab
mujhe khayal aaya ki ….GATE…..gate ki taiyari karunga….maine khane ka order

152
mara aur colony ke paas hee bani ek clinic me apni marham patti kara kar…kuch
medicine lekar wapas apne flat me aaya…..
Mere andar ek khas baat hai ki jab main jo karta hoon tab main use pure mann se
karta hoon…uske aalwa mujhe aur kuch nahi soojhta…phhir chahe wo movie
dekhna ho ya cigarette peena ya phhir padhayi karna….yadi main kuch bhi karne
ek baar baith gaya toh phhir bas usi me ram jata hoon…jiska example ye hai ki
maine lord of the ring ke teeno part ek hee din me yani ki ek hee raat me back to
back dekhe the…third part dekhte samay toh meri aankh se aansu bhi nikalne laga
tha lekin main use complete karke hee utha…yadi maine ye thaan liya ki mujhe
mutth marna hai toh phhir main mutth maar kar hee rahunga…phhir chahe koyi
aa jaye. Bole toh mera concentration itna bhayankar hai ki main kisi se baat karte
hue bhi mutth maar sakta hoon aur yahi haal abhi meri padhayi ka tha….Vandana
Rathi ki chhat se takrane ke baad maine apni behtari ke liye ye decision liya tha ki
main ab agle kuch din koyi dhamal nahi karunga aur isme main kayi din tak
kayam bhi raha…exact kitne din ye toh mujhe yaad nahi…lekin…ek minute…main
count karke batata hoon….maine apne room ki deewar ko dekha jaha maine ek
kale patthar se deewar par is month ka pura calendar bana rakha tha…aur jo-jo
din guzarte ja rahe the us par gola marte ja raha tha….
“teen-do…paanch…paanch-do…saat….total saat din hue hai mujhe Mathematics

padhte hue….jisme bas do chapter aur baaki hai…phhir
mathematics…khatam….iske baad back to back do baar revise
marunga…lawda….nahi toh jo padha hai bhool jaunga…sala itne bade-bade
formulae hai ki gand fat jati hai….formulae toh BC phhir bhi yaad ho jaye…lekin
formulae ke name…..yaad rakhna jyada mushqil hai….chalo baki bache chapter
bhi revise maar leta hoon….” .
Maine laptop me B.S.Grewal ka ebook khola aur padhne me busy ho gaya aur raat
ko ek baje tak ek aur chapter saltine ke baad adhmara sa hokar bistar par let
gaya….laptop me din bhar apni aankh gadane ke karan meri aankh me jalan ho
rahi thi isliye apni aankh band karke main apni aankho ko sahlane laga….
“Arman sir…”
“kaun hai be…”jaise hee mujhe ye aawaz sunayi di maine turant apni aankh kholi
aur apne charo taraf dekha…par waha koyi nahi tha….
“lagta hai vaham hai mera…”bolkar maine apni aankh wapas band ki aur phhir se
apni aankh sahlane laga ki mujhe ek baar phhir se wo aawaz sunayi di…
“tumhari amma ka 9.8….jo bhi hai saamne aao…warna determinant me pack kar
dunga…”
“main idhar hoon sir…”
“abey ye toh reply pe reply aa raha hai…mere flat me mere aalawa aur bhi koyi
rahta hai kya…?”
“please sir…idhar aao…hall me meri garden jakad rahi hai…main saans nahi le pa
rahi…please sir…help me…”
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Ye sunte hee bhay aur aatank ne mujhe apni giraft me le liya…meri himmat nahi
ho rahi thi ki main apni jagah se hil saku…lekin phhir bhi main apne bed se utha
aur dheere-dheere bedroom se deewar ke sahare hall ki taraf badha….hall ki taraf
badhta mera har kadam mujhe kah raha tha ki main aage na jaun…lekin main
dheere-dheere deewar ke sahare aage badhte gaya aur ant me deewar ki oot se
chhipkar maine hall me jhanka….
Maine dekha ki hall me lage pankhe se ek ladki latki hui thi…uske baal bikhre hue
the jisase uska chehra mujhe nahi dikh raha tha. wo apni gardan me rassi fasakar
pankhe se latki hui thi aur apne aap ko chhudane ki bahut koshish kar rahi thi….ek
taraf jaha wo khud ko chhudane ke liye bahut chhatpata rahi thi…wahi dusare
taraf apne naakhoon se apne garden aur chehre ko cheekhte hue noche ja rahi
thi….us ladki ki haalat itni kharab thi ki uska peshab tak nikal gaya tha aur main
kuch karne ke bajay bas deewar ki oot me khada hokar use dekh raha tha…mujhe
samajh hee nahi aaya ki main kya karu…isliye main murti ke saman waha khade
rahkar bas us ladki ko dekhe ja raha tha….lekin phhir us ladki ne mujhe dekh liya
aur apne hath se apne baal ko hatate hue boli….
“sir..main hoon Aradhna…aaj toh bacha lo…”
“Ara..dh..dhna….”
“haan…sir…aapki rakhail…jisne college me aapke liye jaan de di thi…”
Aradhna ka chehra dekh kar mere andar na jaane kaha se itni himmat aa gayi ki
maine apne bedroom se ek chair uthaya aur turant Aradhna ke paas gaya….maine
chair neeche rakha aur uspar chadhkar Aradhna ko pakad liya….
Maine Aradhna ko waha se utara aur seedhe bedroom me lakar bistar par lita
diya….
“thank you ,sir…”
Jawab me maine kuch nahi bola aur turant bhagkar Aradhna ke liye paani laya…
“le , paani pee le…”
“nahi…ab main thik hoon…”wo boli
Jab main Aradhna ke liye bhagkar paani lene gaya tha tab Aradhna ke baal bikhre
hue the aur uske pure chehre par aise nishan the…jaise usne apne aapko noch dala
ho…lekin jab main wapas aaya toh uske sharir me ek bhi zakhm nahi tha….upar
wo ab aisi lag rahi thi…jaise ki usne kitna bhari make up kiya ho….aur toh aur wo
mujhe dekh kar muskura bhi rahi thi…..main wahi khada hokar use dekhta raha ,
wo bhi mujhe dekh rahi thi….
“tum bhoot ho kya…ya phhir..atma…”
“aapko kya lagta hai…”bistar par uthkar baithte hue wo mujhse puchhi…jiska
mere paas koyi jawab nahi tha…balki mere paas toh is samay bahut sawal the…jo
154
main us-se puchhna chahta tha…kayi aise sawal jo uske suicide karne ke baad se
hee mere jehan me bas gaye the aur aaj tak mujhe pareshan kar rahe the….lekin
maine us-se kuch nahi puchha aur wahi bistar ke paas wali deewar par tik kar
neeche baith gaya aur ek cigarette sulgayi….
Maine bahut galtiya ki hai, jisme mujhe maza bhi bahut aata hai par….par mera
aisa manna hai ki Aradhna mere zindagi ki shayad sabse badi galti thi, mera
matlab kya zaroorat thi mujhe Aradhna se pyar ke jhoothe vaade karne ki…meri
zindagi toh thik-thak chal hee rahi thi….kitna acha hota ki yadi main Aradhna se
kabhi mila hee na hota toh…par iski shuruat kaha se hui…8th semester me
anchoring ke practice session se ya phhir kahi aur se…yaad aaya wo sala kallu
kanghi chor ne mujhse ek baar shart lagaya tha ki yadi mujhme dum hai toh main
ek maal pata ke dikhau…bas wahi se maine soch liya tha ki pataunga toh sirf
Aradhna ko hee…mere aisa kahne ki do vazah thi…ek toh ye ki Aradhna college me
new aayi thi aur bahut easy target thi…dusari vazah ye ki Aradhna ki wo kallu bhi
lena chahta tha…isliye maine uske target par hee nishana saadh liya kyunki jab
main kisi ki gand marta hoon toh khoon nikal deta hoon…matlab itna bada drama
sirf ek shart ki vazah se hua tha…lekin galti meri hee thi…main chahta toh
Aradhna ke sath apne rishte ko kabhi aage badhne hee nahi deta…main chahta toh
Aradhna kabhi mere itne karib nahi aati…lekin mere andar hee choot ki bhookh
sawar thi…uspar se itna ghamand ki maine Aradhna ki itni insult ki…sari galti
meri thi…mujhe aisa nahi karna chahiye tha…maine hee Aradhna ko suicide ke
liye mazboor kiya…uske baad jo mere sath hua wo toh sirf meri galti ka
consequences the…jo maine jhela aur jhel kar nikal bhi aaya….
Main deewar ke sahare tik kar neeche baitha raha aur puri raat wahi baithe-baithe
Aradhna ko niharta raha…wo aaj bhi waisi dikhti thi…jaisa ki pahle dikhti
thi…waha neeche baithe-baithe main ghanto Aradhna ko ghoorta raha aur isi
dauran beech me mujhe neend aa gayi…subah jab meri neend khuli toh Aradhna
waha nahi thi….shayad wo chali gayi thi… maine deewar par mere dwara banaye
gaye calendar me aaj ki taarikh par gola mara aur taiyar hokar Ganga-Jamuna
jaane ke liye nikal gaya…kyunki kal raat ko Daddu ne mujhe call karke ye kaha
tha ki main aakar guns dekh loon….
Main apne room se bahar nikla aur darwaja lock karke jaise hee peeche palta
mujhe saamne Aradhna khadi dikh gayi…jo is samay kafi gusse me dikh rahi
thi....maine aav na dekha taav aur turant peeche mudkar bhag khada hua…
“bhag le beta…atma gusse me lag rahi hai…peeche wali boundary kood ke khisak
le…”
.
Maine aisa hee kiya aur peeche wali boundary koodkar…waha se khisak liya…ab
kyunki mujhe Ganga-jamuna jana tha aur paidal main itni door ja nahi sakta
tha…isliye maine ek auto pakda aur ek side me chup-chap baithkar Madhulika ke
bare me sochane laga….
Auto me driver ke aalawa is samay main aur ek Buddha tha….auto driver 30-32
saal ka raha hoga…lekin tha BC full tharki….jaha bhi sadak par ladkiyo ko
dekhta…phhir chahe wo dusari side me hee kyun na chal rahi ho…auto rok kar un
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sabse puchhta ki kaha chalogi….yaha chalogi….waha chalogi…..ab bechari ladkiya

koyi jawab nahi de rahi thi…isliye uski himmat badhte gayi….ab wo jaha ladkiyo
dekhta wahi pel ke horn bajane lagta….auto wale ke baar-baar auto
rokne…ladkiyo par chillane aur unhe dekh kar horn bajane ke karan mera
concentration bigad raha tha….upar se mere side me baitha budhau jo ab tak shant
baitha tha…wo bhi us auto wale ke sath shamil ho gaya aur haste hue bola….
“aahha…dekho toh kaise gand pasar-pasar kar chal rahi hai. mann karta hai
dauda-dauda chodu”
Phhir jab ek ladki us budhau ke bagal se pass hui toh wo use ‘janu’ bolkar
chillaya…..apne isi chhiltayi ko continue karte hue auto wale ne chup-chap jaa rahi
ek ladki ko dekhkar auto roka…aur us-se bola…
“condom nagar chalogi kya…condom nagar….”
Jiske jawab me wo ladki kuch nahi boli…aur bina kuch bole aage badh gayi…jispar
mere bagal me baitha budhau auto se apni garden nikal kar chillaya….
“oye janu…chal na…condom nagar…”
Mujhe koyi fark nahi padta ki wo dono kiske sath kya kar rahe the…lekin unki is
harqat ke karan main bahut disturb ho raha tha aur jab main jitna disturb hota
hoon tab main utna hee gussa hota hoon…upar se frustrated toh main hoon
hee…maine auto rukwaya aur auto se utar kar pahle budhau ko kheechkar ek hath
diya aur phhir ek laat auto wale ke seedhe jabde me mara….jisase wo dusari taraf
palti markar gir gaya…
“Maadharchod…aise auto chalata hai…is-se acha toh titanic wala ship chalaya
raha…”
“hath kaise lagaya be…teri bhain cho…”bolkar gusse se wo utha aur ghoom kar
mere paas aaya….maine turant katta nikala aur uske sar par taan diya….
“peeche chal be randi ki aulaad, jaha hai wahi khada rah warna gand me goli
marunga toh gand band ho jayegi….teri chachi ka pond…bhosdiwale.teri maa ne
kutte se chudwaya tha kya jo tujh jaisa kutta paida hua”
Meri gaaliya sunkar autowala mujhe jaan se marna chahta tha par mere hath me
gun dekhkar Auto wala jaha tha wahi rook gaya…aur gun apne upar dekh shant
hokar sirf gun ko dekhne laga…waha aas-paas aur bhi log the aur sabki nazar
mujhpar tiki hui thi….maine auto wale ko waha se chup-chap khisakne ke liye
kaha, actually kaha nahi bas katta ghumakar ekdum role me waha se jaane ka
ishara kiya aur uske jaane ke baad phhir ek dusare auto me baithkar waha se
Ganga-jamuna ke liye ravana ho gaya….sale ye mujhe chodna sikhayenge.
.
Mujhe pata nahi ki Ganga-jamuna aate hee mujhe kya ho jata hai…kyun main is
tarah ki gundo wali harqate karne lagta hoon…mana ki main acting karne me
mahir hoon lekin itni real acting…? wo bhi ek gunde ki…? mujhe ye toh maloom
rahta hai ki main kya kar raha hoon lekin mujhe yaha Ganga-jamuna me aisa
lagta hai ki jaise mere sharir me main nahi balki koyi aur hai….jaise kisi ne meri
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body se aatma exchange kar di ho….phhir…main…main nahi rahta…mera mujhpar

koyi control nahi rahta…sabkuch mujhe aisa lagta hai jaise ki scripted ho…jaise ki
ye sab mujhe pahle se pata hai ki kya hone wala hai…jaise ki ye sab pahle bhi ho
chuka hai…
“ To me…present seems like past and past like future….confused ? well me

too”cigarette jalate hue maine khud se bola “but I’m enjoying it now”
Aaj main direct Madhulika ke baap ke paas gaya aur mujhe dekhte hee wo ummid
ke viparit khush hua…jisase main soch me pad gaya ki kya ye sach me khush hai
ya meri tarah acting kar raha hai….
“kyun be dalle…itna muskura kyun raha hai….”
“kya babu…maine toh socha tha ki aap us din ke paisa nahi doge…lekin aapne toh
2000 diye the….”
“kyun be budhau…tune toh kaha tha ki wo teri biwi hai…lekin jab maine aas-paas
logo se pucha toh unhone kaha ki Madhulika teri biwi nahi balki teri beti hai….
apni beti ki dalali karta hai tu…bhadwe”
“roji-roti ka sawal hai…sahib…Daddu is ilaake me kisi ko iske aalawa koyi aur

dhandha karne hee nahi deta….ye chay ka thela toh customer se baat-chit karne
vaste hai…kya kahte hai angrezi me ise….aaffice…ye mera aaffice hai…”
“Madhulika hai kya…andar…”
“haan malik…jayiye…”
“mujhse pahle aaj koyi aaya toh nahi tha…”
“itni subah-subah kaun aayega…aap aaj ke pahle customer ho….”
“aaj paise nahi dunga…. Samjha…isliye apni beti ko paise ke liye…pareshan mat
karna….”
.
Maine aaj bhi wahi raasta liya ,jis raaste se wo us din mujhe le gaya tha…jo seedhe
Madhulika ke ghar ke peeche milta tha…andar aane ke baad main seedhe us room
me gaya jaha charpayi rakhi hui thi….main charpayi me baitha aur Madhulika bhi
mere bagal me baithi….
“itne din kaha the aap…”mere hath ko sahlate hue Madhulika puchhi….
“aurat chahe randi hee kyun na ho...be-matlab ke sawal puchh kar hee
rahegi…tujhe kya zaroorat hai ye sawal puchhne ki……kya tu yaha ki ekmatra
randi hai…jo main sirf tere paas hee aaunga….apne kaam se kaam rakh…aur chal
thook ke choos…tu ek rakhail hai aur rakhail hee rah…wo chutiye aur hote honge
jo apna dimag lund me lekar ghoomte hai aur tum jaisi chhinaro ki meethi-meethi
baato me aakar apna sab kuch luta dete hai…main wo hoon jo tum logo ka sab
kuch loot dunga…isliye mujhe apni hoshiyari mat dikha…sirf choot dikha…”

157
Meri jali-kati baat sunkar Madhulika apna daant peeskar rah gayi…wo mujhe
shayad us waqt jaan se marna chah rahi hogi…ye andaza maine laga liya kyunki
aksar mere aas-paas rahne wale log yahi chahte hai…Madhulika ne mere katte ki
taraf bhi ek nazar mari…jo maine uski bistar par rakh diya tha…aur jab wo meri
jali – kati sunkar katte ki taraf dekhne lagi toh thodi der ke liye main dar gaya…
“dar mat…katta khali hai…sale fattu…”

.
Main bistar par hee neeche pair latka kar baitha raha…Madhulika neeche zameen
par baithi aur meri pant utarne lagi…pahle usne belt nikala aur phhir mere pant ki
button kholkar mere pant ko thoda neeche khiska di….maine uske sar ko peeche se
pakda aur uske face ko apne underwear ke upar ragadne laga….shuru me toh usne
koyi virodh nahi kiya lekin phhir thodi der ke baad wo apna chehra waha se
hatane ki koshish karne lagi…lekin maine uska sar apne dono hatho se daboch
rakha tha…isliye wo chhoot pane me naqam rahi….wo mujhe maar bhi rahi
thi…lekin main uska sar pakad kar uska chehra apni underwear me ragadta hee
raha.
“harami….”maine jab uska sar chhoda toh wo apna daant peeskar mujhe boli aur
wahi zameen par lambi-lambi saans lete hue let gayi….
“madarchod, lund se daba kar mar dalunga…”
Maine neeche jhuk kar uski saree pakdi aur jor-jor se kheechne laga….jiske karan
uski saree ka thoda sa hee bhag uske jisme se nikalne ke baad fat gaya….maine
apne shirt ke jeb se ek hazar ka patta nikal kar uske muh me feka aur phhir se uski
saree pakad kar kheechne laga...kyunki mujhe maloom tha ki ek randi afterall sirf
paiso ki bhookhi hoti hai…paise ke liye toh wo ek jaanwar se bhi chudwa sakti
hai….bistar se uthkar main bhi zameen me Madhulika ke upar let gaya….
“aaj mere se pahle koyi aaya tha….”
“nahi…”mere dwara feke gaye hazar ke note ko uthakar side me rakhkar

Madhulika ne jawab diya….
“tune brush kiya hai…”
“haan…”bolkar mere peeth me wo apne hath ferne lagi….
Madhulika ka bas itna bolna tha ki main uske hontho ko choosne laga…. Par
humara kissing scene successful nahi ho pa raha tha…kyunki Madhulika beech me
baar-baar apna jeebh le aa rahi thi….
“lawda nahi choos rahi hai tu…honth choos rahi hai…”bolte hue maine uski choot
ke upar hath rakha aur upar se hee sahlane laga…
Main uski taraf dekh kar bahut der tak uski choot ko sahlata raha aur phhir uski
bachi-kuchi saree ko upar kiya….usne aaj bhi underwear nahi pahani hui thi….
“tu underwear kyun nahi pahanti…”
“chaddi…? ”
158
“hmm…”uski choot ko lagatar masalte hue maine kaha….
“jab din me 5-6 baar utarna hee hai toh ,chaddi pahan kar kya fayda….”
“chal phhir, ghoom ja….”Madhulika ke upar se uthkar maine kaha….
Madhulika ne saree…blouse utar kar wahi ek kinare rakh di aur aur phhir apni
taang faila kar let gayi…..
“tel waha upar rakha hai….”
“aaj bina tel ke…”
“dard hoga….”
“toh kya aise hee main tujhe hazaro rupaye deta hoon…taaki tujhe pata bhi na
chale…? meri lund ki mauzoodagi ka tujhe kuch toh ahsaas hona chahiye…kyunki
afterall main mahan, mera lund mahan ”
“mujhe nahi aapko dard hoga….baad me…”
“ wo main sah lunga….”kahte hue maine uski gand ko failaya aur apna lund uske
gand par rakhkar dhakka mara….
“tel laga ke chodo na….please”
“chal be Sali…”kahkar maine apne lund par aur jor lagaya jis-se mera pura lund
uski gand me dhas gaya aur tabhi mujhe aisa laga jaise koyi chiz mere lund ko
jakad rahi thi… par thodi der baad jab maine physics ka concept lagaya toh mujhe
samajh aa gaya ki ye sab Madhulika ke dwara apni gand tight karne ka nateeza
hai….
Mera pura lund uski gand ke andar dastak de chukka tha lekin phhir bhi main
jabran apne lund ko aur andar thelne ki koshish kar raha tha….maine Madhulika
ka dono hath uski kamar par rakhkar apne ek hath se pakad liya aur apna lund
uski gand se bahar nikal kar condom utar ke fek diya….maine ab condom ke bina
lund uski gand ke muhane par rakha aur jaise hee maine apna lund uski gand me
dala wo apna sar aadha ghuma kar apna hath chhudane ki nakam koshish karne
lagi….
“pitaji ne kaha hai ki bina condom ke kisi ko bhi chodne na du….wo kahte hai ki ye
saale randi baaz…awara kutte hote hai….pata nahi kaha-kaha ghusate rahte
hai….”
“kya kabhi tune kisi kutte ko kutiya ko chodte waqt condom lagate hue dekha
hai….”Madhulika ko chodte hue uske pichhawade par pinch karte hue main
bola…”mujhe tere bare me ye toh pata hai ki tu is dhandhe me kaise aayi…lekin
Sali randi…tu itni sharif dikhti nahi… randi ban-ne se pahle bhi tune kisi ka lawda
liya raha hoga….let me guess…apne mohalle ke kisi ladke ka…ya phhir…mohalle
ke kisi aadmi ka…? ya phhir kisi buddhe ka ...yaaa phhir kisi jaanwar kar”

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“apne pitaji kaaaa….”
“saaaaach….”Madhulika ko chodte hue main beech me ruka…. “sala, in**st lover”
“ meeeeri..meri maa jab bimar hui tooo..ooh….pita ji ne maa ke samne mujhe

nanga karke choda tha....main cheekhti rahi…chillati rahi…lekin meri madad
karne koyi nahi aaya….bhagwan bhi nahi…”
“at the end, god will not help you…trust me, I have seen the future”bolte hue maine
uska hath chhod diya…
“kya…”apne dono hath zameen par rakh kar uthne ki koshish karte hue boli…
“mujhe kuch samajh nahi aaya…”
“chup chap leti rah….raand” Madhulika ko wapas neeche dhakel kar main bola
“aur main bol raha tha ki bhagwan koyi madad nahi karta…wo ab tang ho chuka
hai insano se…insaan use irritate karte hai….isiliye ab bhagwan insano ki madad
nahi karte…wo toh bas ab insano ko khatm karne ke firaq me hai…”
“neeche farsh par sex karne se baad me sharir bahut dukhta hai…aap bahut bhari
ho…”
“ok…chal uth…aur bistar par jakar ghodi ban ja….”
Abki baar maine Madhulika ko uthne diya.Madhulika uthi aur bistar par ghodi
bankar apne chutado ko hilane lagi, mano wo mujhe bula rahi ho….
“Daddu ko kabhi police pakad kar nahi le gayi….”uske peeche jakar uske chutado
ko sahlate hue maine puchha
“abhi kuch mahine pahle le gayi thi…jab usne yaha ke purv vidhayak ko dhamki di
thi…”
“thank you….”uski choot par apna lund rakhte hue khushi se maine kaha“toh wo
dukan wala sahi kah raha tha…news confirmed…tune jo kuch bhi us din Daddu ke
bare me bataya tha use us dukan wale ne confirm kiya aur yaha ke Ex-MLA se
Daddu ke lafde ke baare me jo us dukan wale ne bataya tha, use tune confirm
kiya….L.H.S. = R.H.S. , hence proved…”
.
Apni bhookh shant karne ke baad main bistar se utha aur apne kapde pahan-ne
laga….Madhulika bistar par hee leti hui thi aur meri taraf hee dekhe ja rahi
thi….uska yun meri taraf dekhna mujhe disturb kar raha tha aur pasand toh bilkul
bhi nahi aa raha tha…jispar pahle toh maine kuch nahi kaha lekin jab wo mujhe
aise hee dekhti rahi toh main irritate hokar bola…
“aise kya dekh rahi hai be…tum randiyo ko main ache se janta hoon…aise hee look
de-dekar logo ko apne jaal me fasti ho aur unka sab kuch lootkar unka ghar tabah
kar deti ho…lekin jaisa ki maine pahle bhi kaha hai ki main un chutiyo ki tarah
nahi hoon..”apna belt kaste hue main bola…jise sunkar Madhulika hasne lagi….
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“bahut ki pant utari hai maine, saheb…aur pant ke sath-sath unke chehre se unka
naqab bhi…aur meri baat mano toh ab aap yaha mat aao…warna loot kar hee
jaoge…aap ye bolto ho ki main aapka kuch nahi loot paungi…par jitni baar aap
yaha aaye utni baar aap sirf lut kar gaye hai, loot kuch nahi paye”
“ye hazar-do hazar…huh..ye hazar-do hazar mere liye koyi mayne nahi rakhte aur
aaj kal toh bilkul bhi nahi”
“ye toh abhi shuruat hai...waqt ke sath-sath ye mulaqat bhi badhegi aur ye hazar
ka aakda bhi….maine bade-bade mahapursho ko yaha nanga hote hue dekha hai
toh phhir aap kya chiz ho….”
“main yugpurush hoon…aur kyunki mera sathi Physics hai isliye mujhe duniya ki
koyi taqat nahi hara sakti aur is mind game toh bilkul bhi nahi… tum log bas thoda
intezaar karo, Ganga-Jamuna me rahne wali har ek randi ki gand laal nahi ki toh
mera name bhi Shri Arman nahi….i mean Shri Arman 3.0” apne kapde pahan kar
maine goggle lagaya aur cigarette jalakar uska dhua Madhulika ke muh me fek
kar bola…
“tujhe andaza bhi nahi ki apne aap ko sahi sabit karne ke liye aur apna badla lene
ke liye main kitna neeche gir sakta hoon…. mere liye toh physics bhi apna law
badal deta hai… in short, I’m that dog who will bite everyone…see you soon…ache
se gand marwana…bye”
Chapter-16: Recall-1/The Breakup Show
Madhulika se vida lekar main seedhe Daddu ke yaha pahucha… aaj Daddu ke
shagirdo ne mujhe ache se bithaya aur chay-pani ke liye bhi puchha…Daddu waise
toh raat ke samay hee Itwari me aata hai, lekin thodi jaanch-padtal ke baad mujhe
ye maloom hua tha ki subah 10 baje ke pahle bhi Daddu Ganga-Jamuna ka ek
round marta hai aur ye sach bhi nikla kyunki Daddu is samay apne hee adde par
Ajmeri bai ke sath busy tha…isliye main waha Daddu ke jhat jaise cabin me baith
kar cigarette par cigarette peeta raha….lekin Daddu tha ki Ajmeri ko chhodne ka
name hee nahi le raha tha….maine ek aur cigarette muh me fasayi aur use chabate
hue khud se bola….
“sala kaun si goli khata hai be…jo itni der se nikal hee nahi raha….puchhna
padega, Vandana Rathi ko wahi goli khakar chodunga”
Maine waha aas-paas mauzood uske pantaro se kaha ki wo jakar Daddu ko mera
messege de…tab unme se ek bola ki yadi unhone Daddu ko disturb kiya toh wo
unhe jaan se mar dega… unke pantaro ne ye bhi kaha ki last time jab Daddu
,Ajmeri ke sath tha toh pure char ghante tak andar hee raha tha….sala Viagra-
baz….par meri kismat achi thi…mujhe waha sirf ek ghanta hee Daddu ke liye wait
karna pada….ek ghante baad Daddu aur Ajmeri dono sath me nikle….Daddu ke
hath me katta tha toh uska dusra hath Ajmeri bai ke pichhwade me tha….undono
ko dekh main waha baitha raha jise Daddu apna office bolta tha…jiske baad Daddu
ne mujhe dekha aur Daddu ke sath Ajmeri bai bhi waha us office me aayi…Daddu
table ke us paar main chair me baitha aur Ajmeri bai table ke is paar mere bagal
me rakhi chair par sawar hui….

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“light on kar be…”Daddu ne aawaz mari aur uske aawaz marte hee jaha hum log
baithe the waha ki light chalu ho gayi…
“kyun ladke…us din ke baad dikha nahi kothe par…us din toh bahut badi-badi
baate kar raha tha…”mere hath par apna hath rakhte hue Ajmeri boli…
“chhat par koodte waqt chot lag gayi thi...”
“chhat ko toh chhod deta…”haste hue Ajmeri boli…
“nice one… par maine koodte hue kaha…aapne shayad kuch aur samjha”
“tu meri bare me mere hee area me puchh-tachh kar raha hai…tune mujhe chutiya
samajh rakha hai kya…”mere aur baby face Ajmeri Bai ke beech ke conversation
ko khatm karte hue Daddu bola…
“chutiya nahi samajhdar samajhata hu…isiliye socha ki aap samajh jaoge…main

aapke sath gun smuggling kar raha hoon…toh thoda bahut toh puchh-tachh karna
mangta hai ki nahi….? waise us din aapne jin do aadmi ko mera peechha karne ke
liye chhoda tha….unhe bol dena ki main waha nahi rahta ,jis ghar me main ghusa
tha…wo toh unhe bhatkane ke liye main ghusa tha…waise bhi meri party ka main
dealer main nahi hoon main toh bas broker hoon… aap bas ye samajh lo ki aise hee
do number ke dhandhe se mera guzara chalta hai…”
“chutiye sale…par unhone toh kaha tha ki tu waha se wapas hee nahi nikla…”
“main bhagte hue aage se ghusa aur bhagte hue peeche se nikal gaya…guns kab
tak aa jayege…”
“main tere ko phone karunga…”
“no problem…by the way apun aapke vaste kuch laya hai…”ek packet table par
rakhte hue maine kaha…
“kya hai iske andar…”
“new phone…”Ajmeri bai ki taraf muskura kar dekhte hue maine kaha “wo bhi
seal…packed…jiske badle me mujhe sirf itna chahiye ki mera maal ek mahine ke
andar mujhe mil jaye…jiske baad main yaha mauzood har ek shaks ko ek mobile
gift karunga…even Ajmeri bai ko bhi…”
Itne me Daddu ke aadmi ek shaks ko jabran ghaseet-te hue utha kar waha laye aur
Daddu ko bahar bulakar us shaks ko marne lage…Daddu ne apne aadmiyo ko use
wahi andar cabin me lane ke liye kaha….shayad wo mujhpar apna raub jhadna
chahta tha…maine us shaks ko dekha…wo meri umra ka hee tha…ya phhir mujhse
kuch saal thoda bada raha hoga…uske andar aate hee Daddu ne us par katta taan
diya aur bola
“kyun be…tujhe samajh nahi aata kya…bola na ki teri behan Ajmeri bai ke kothe
par dhandha karegi…uska college kal se band…ab uski class kal se Ajmeri bai ke
kothe par lagegi…aur kal se tu apni behan ka dalal kahlayega…”
162
“mujhe maaf kar do Daddu bhai…wo meri behan hai…”rote hue Daddu ke pair
pakad kar wo gidgidane laga…
“wo teri behan hee hai…biwi toh nahi hai na…wo kya hai ki teri behan bilkul seal
packed hai…is mobile ki tarah…isliye uska rate bahut jyada rahega….aur Ajmeri
bai ke kothe par bahut kam khush naseeb ladkiyo ko kaam karne ka mauka milta
hai…”
“lekin Daddu bhai…”
“Madarchod…samajh nahi aata kya…ek baar me….”ek laat use markar Daddu bola
“tu apne aap hee apni behan ko Ajmeri bai ke kothe par chhod ja…warna tere pure
khandan ko randi bana kar Ajmeri bai ke kothe par dhandha karwaunga…chal
nikal sale yaha se ab…”
Maine ye sab kuch dekha , ye sab mere saamne hee hua…jaha ek taqatwar aadmi
ne ek kamzor ko dhamki di thi… us pure samay main yahi sochta raha ki Main us
aadmi ki help kar sakta hoon…main koyi tikdam lagakar use aur uski behan ko
bacha sakta hoon…aisa meri antaratma ne mujhse kaha….par isi ke sath ek aur
sawal jo meri antaratma ne mere saamne rakha ki…why should I….. kya lena-dena
mujhe us anjaan shaks ki behan se… kaun sa lawda yadi main use bacha lunga toh
uski bahan mujhse chudwayegi…. Hat BC , do-do antaratma…..
.
filhal toh maine us matter me koyi ungali nahi ki aur seedhe Colony ke liye ravana
hua...Apne flat pahuchkar Maine jaise hee main gate khola mujhe farsh par ek
notice dikhayi diya…par actual me wo koyi notice nahi tha…balki electricity bill
tha…maine electricity bill ko dekha aur modkar dustbin me nishana lagane laga…..
“sala, miss ho gaya….? par kaise…”chaukte hue maine phhir se us bill ko uthaya
aur dustbin se thodi door jakar dustbin par phhir se nishana lagaya….
“phhir se miss…ye kaise mumkin hai…”
Maine phhir se bill uthaya aur use modkar ek-do mantra jo mujhe school time ke
yaad the unhe bolkar dustbin me nishana lagakar feka…lekin main is baar bhi
chook gaya tha…jisase khisiya kar maine decide kiya ki jab tak ye bill dustbin me
nahi jayega...main dustbin me nishana lagata hee rahunga…phhir chahe subah
hee kyun na ho jaye…maine apna sara hunar ,sari mehnat laga di tab jakar 31st
time me bill dustbin me goal hua aur Dustbin me goal marne ke baad maine apni
khushi ka izhar karne ke liye hawa me hath uthaya hee tha ki mujhe kisi ne
peechhe se pakda. Pakda kya…balki daboch liya…jiske karan main jhijhak utha
aur peechhe palat kar dekha….
“hello sir…”
“hell..O…hello”
“how are you, sir….”apni pakad mazboot banate hue Aradhna ne puchha…

163
“f..f..faa….fine…how..how are you…Aradhana”kanpte hue maine jawab diya….
“aap mujhse itna darte kyun ho…pahle toh aap aise nahi the…kya aap ab badal
chuke ho….”
“main aur dar….m..m…main kaha…haahaaaa”
“you love me, right…”
“ofcourse…not…I mean why not”Aradhna ke changul se chhootne ki koshish karte

hue maine kaha…lekin usne itni mazbooti se mujhe pakad rakha tha ki main uske
changul se chhoot tak nahi paa raha tha….
“sir, aapko yaad hai…college time pe kaise aap mujhe bure ladko se bachaya karte
the…”
“ yaad… ofcourse yaad hai…”Aradhna ki pakad se chhootne ki koshish karte hue

maine kaha…lekin jab abki baar bhi main nakam raha toh main
bola…“Janeman,ab kya tum mujhe chhodogi…mujhe bathroom jaana hai…”
“thik hai”
“jaha power kaam na aaye waha pyar kaam aata hai…”
Aradhna ke chhodne ke baad…main jaldi se bhagkar bathroom me ghusa aur

bathroom ka gate andar se band kar liya….
“iski maa ka…abey ye kya tha…wo bhootni aaj kaise aa gayi…pahle toh kuch din
ka gap lekar aati thi…kahi main sapna toh nahi dekh raha…let me check…”
“lawda check…real hai…”
“tujhe kaise pata…”
“yakin nahi toh apna sar patak ke dekh le…ya phhir bathroom me susu kar
le…yadi sapna hoga toh bistar me geelepan ki vazah se teri neend khul
jayegi…jaise bachpan me hota tha…remember”
“great idea… “
“welcome ”
.
164
Maine apne pant ki zib kholi aur susu karte hue bathroom me Arun ka name likhne
laga…. ye raha…A… R… U… lekin Arun ka pura name likhne se pahle hee mera tank
khali ho gaya aur main ab bhi wahi tha…
“ye haqiqat hai…”apne lund par jor dete hue maine kaha…. “anyway…main Arun
ka name complete zaroor karunga…”
Maine apne pet me thoda aur bal lagaya aur phhir Arun ka name complete karke
bathroom me hee khade-khade sochne laga ki ab kya karu….Aradhna ko yaha se
kaise rafa-dafa karu…ye toh Sali gale hee pad gayi…ab ise kaun samjhaye ki is
duniya me sabse jyada nafrat main Gautam ke baad isi se karta hoon…Sali dehati
kahi ki…khamkha har baar mere peechhe pad jati hai….kya karu…kya karu…
“thik waisa hee kar jaisa ki tune college time me kiya tha…Aradhna se break up
karne ke dauran…”Version 2.0 ne apni salah mujhe di…
“mujhe thik se kuch yaad nahi…aajkal meri power thodi kam ho gayi hai…bole toh
mera sixth sense aajkal kaam nahi kar raha…mujhe toh ye tak nahi maloom ki aaj
ki taarikh kaun si hai…jabki deewar bar banaye gaye calendar me maine subah
hee aaj ki taarikh par gola mara tha”
“main help karu…”
“hmm…”
“aankhe band kar…”
“aankh band karu…par kyun…”
“flashback baby…flashback… ab kya aankh kholkar flashback me jayega”
“oh k…”
maine apni aankh band ki aur aankh band karte hee mujhe sabse pahle mera
college dikhayi diya…badhiya bada sa, behatareen sa… jaha maine apni zindagi ke
sabse behtareen char saal guzare the ya phhir yun kah lijiye ki jaha maine apni
zindagi ke sabse bekar char saal guzare the… maine dekha ki waha college ke
165
saamne kuch jhat barabar launde the , jo parking me khade hokar ladkiyo ko line
maar rahe the….
“2.0, please, change the location…I hate my college”
aur mere aisa bolte hee mera dimag college se girls hostel ki taraf jaane wali sadak
par daudne laga...ye sab bahut speed ke sath ho raha tha matlab bahut hee tez gati
ke sath mera dimag girls hostel wali sadak par dauda aur aakhir me Girls hostel ke
bahar jakar rook gaya aur maine dekha ki main toh waha par pahle se hee khada
tha lekin main toh yaha tha… maine do-do antaratma ka experience kuch der pahle
hee liya tha par ab do-do Arman…ye kaise mumkin hai ? main toh yaha peechhe
khada hoon , phhir waha hostel ke gate ke saamne mujh jaisa dikhne wala insaan
kaun hai…. kahi wo Gautam toh nahi, jo mask lagakar aaya ho, ya phhir Arun…
“abey jhat, brain ke through tu flashback me hai… time travel me nahi… jaha tu
Arman-1 ke sharir me ghus jata hai… kya tujhe flashback aur time-travel ke beech
ka difference nahi maloom ? flashback me tu sirf dekh sakta hai, sun sakta hai.. ro
sakta hai aur ye sab sirf tujh tak simit rahega… bakiyo ko tere presence ka aabhas
tak nahi hoga… ye mera time tha aur jo tere saamne Arman khada hai wo 2.0
hai..yaani ki main..”
“par tu toh yaha mere saamne hai”
“abey gandul… ye flashback hai.. jab log kisi ko apne beeti yaado ke baare me
batate hai tab bhi toh wo dono jagah hote hai… ab samjha kuch.. khud ko Physics-
putra kahta hai aur itna nahi maloom… jaa back to back dus baar mutth markar
mar ja kahi..”
“bas kar be aur kitni insult karega show shuru kiya jaye”
Toh waha…. Girls hostel ke bahar main khada tha aur Aradhna ka besabri se
intezaar kar raha tha….abhi 6:30 baje the aur raat 7 baje tak hee ladkiyo ko bahar
aane-jane ki permission thi…waise kahne ko toh wo flashback tha par main
mahsoos kar sakta tha ki waha khada Arman kya mahsoos kar raha hai…kyunki
wo main hee tha…
Aradhna ko ab apni girl friend bolne me mujhe kuchh khas achchha nahi lagta tha
.ek to wo average ladki thi,upar se use main kayi baar apne dosto ke room me
lejakar chod chuka tha...isliye ab uspar mujhe koyi interest nahi tha ,halanki uski
badi-badi chutado me ab bhi itna dam tha ki wo mera lawda khada kar de...lekin
ab sala mood nahi hota tha ,Aradhna ke sath wo sab karne ko....aur waise bhi jiski
girl friend Esha jaisi ladki ban jaye toh phhir Aradhna jaisi ek average gaanv ki
ladki ke sath relationship banakar kaun apni durgati karaye....isliye main us waqt
166
Aradhna se milne gaya tha....halaki us waqt mujhe Aradhna se sahanubhuti toh ho

rahi thi ki usko bura lagega...lekin main kar bhi kya sakta tha...main nahi chahta
tha ki kisi din jab main college me Esha ke sath kahi ghoom raha hoon toh Aradhna
waha aaye aur bole ki “kal raat ki chudai ka asar abhi tak hai…sir, please aisa mat
choda karo....” isliye main aaj idhar sab kuchh khatam karne aaya tha…lekin
mujhe us waqt kya pata tha ki sabkuch wakayi me khatm ho jayega….
.
Mera aisa manna tha ki Aradhna mujhse naraz hogi ,mujhpar
cheekhegi,chillayegi...yaha tak ki gusse me hath bhi utha sakti hai isliye Aradhna
ko hostel se bahar aate dekh maine apne hatho ko kisi bhi achanak hamle se
nipatne ke liye taiyar kar liya tha.
"kya hua sir, itni raat ko...kya vichar hai...aapka"hamesha ki tarah chudne ke
mood me aate hue Aradhna boli... Sali randi..Madarchod
"bas aise hee..."(thode der ruk hawasi, aisa lawda ghusaunga ki zindagi bhar dard
nahi jayega)
"phhir kahiye...kyun kast kiya yaha tak aane ka..."
"mujhe kuchh kahna hai tere ko..."
"toh nervous kyun ho rahe ho...aap bhi nervous hote ho kya.."mera mazak udate
hue Aradhna hasi...
Update-56
Quote:
"phhir kahiye...kyun kast kiya yaha tak aane ka..."
"mujhe kuchh kahna hai tere ko..."
"toh nervous kyun ho rahe ho...aap bhi nervous hote ho kya.."mera mazak udate
hue Aradhna hasi...
"main actually nervous nahi hoon, nervous hone ki acting kar raha hoon ,taki jo
main aage kahne wala hoon, use sunkar tera dard kuchh kam ho aur main
ye…ye…kahna chahta hoon ki main tujhse pyar nahi karta...wo sab to aise hee bas
time pass karne ke liye maine ye sab natak kiya tha...."
Itna bolkar Maine socha ki abhich...bas abhich Aradhna royegi, mujhpar hath
uthayegi...lekin usne waisa kuchh nahi kiya .ulta wo rone ki bajay aise hasne lagi
jaise maine uski choot me gudgudi ki ho.....
"tu has kyun rahi hai...main sach bol raha hoon "

167
"mujhe yahi batane ke liye hostel se bahar bulaye ho..."Aradhna ne thode der ke
liye apni hansi roki aur phhir hasne lagi.....
"hans le,mera kya hai...lekin main kuchh chize clear kar diye deta hoon...ab se na
toh tu mujhe call karna aur na hee messege...waise bhi agar tu ye sab karna bhi
chahegi to kar nahi payegi ,kyunki main kal hee apna number change kar dunga
aur apna purana number hostel ke kisi launde ko de dunga...isliye soch-samajh kar
hee messege karna..."
"hmmm...."ye sunkar Aradhna ki hansi abki ruk gayi...."main samjhi nahi

kuch...aap kahna kya chahte ho..."
"main directly jo kahna chahta hoon,use indirectly hee samajh le na...tujhe hee
fayda hoga..."
"matlab…"
"indirectly nahi samajhi na...toh phhir le, directly sun .maine tere door ke bhai
kallu kanghichor se shart lagayi thi ki main tujhe pata ke chodunga...jisme main
kamyaab raha. Lekin ab mera mann bhar gaya hai,isliye...aaj se hum kabhi nahi
milenge aur yadi kabhi mile bhi toh baat nahi karenge aur yadi kabhi baat bhi
karni padi to ,is baare me to bilkul bhi baat nahi karenge...."thode der ke liye main
ruka ,kyunki jaise-jaise main bolte ja raha tha,Aradhna ki aankhe dheere-dheere
badi hoti ja rahi thi...wo rona chahti thi,ya phhir kahe ki wo bas ro hee deti ,yadi
main us waqt chup na hua hota toh....isliye main thodi der ke liye ruka aur jab
mujhe yakin ho gaya ki ,Aradhna ab thoda normal ho gayi hai to maine aage bolna
shuru kiya....
"maa kasam, Aradhna...main tujhse bilkul bhi pyar nahi karta.main kisi aur se
pyar karta hoon, main tujhe uska name bhi batata lekin security reasons ki vazah
se main tujhe uska naam nahi bataunga.main janta hoon ki tujhe bahut bura lag
raha hoga aur lagna bhi chahiye… aakhir tune mujhse apni gand aise hee thodi
marwayi hai ki main kisi aur ko dekh kar ya phhir sochkar mutth maru…lekin
main kya karu....main mazboor hoon…waise bhi tujhe sochna chahiye tha ki mujh
jaisa ladka college ki baki ladkiyo ko chhodkar tere peechhe kyun padega .main
janta hoon ki main bahut bura kah raha hoon lekin mujhe is waqt bilkul bhi bura
nahi lag raha hai ,jo is baat ki gavaah hai ki mere kaleje me tere liye zero point
zero zero zero zero one(0.00001) ke barabar bhi koyi feeling nahi hai par main
tujhe salah de sakta hoon… Google me jakar search karna ki 'how to forget ex-
boyfriend'. Ummid hai,kuch kaam ki chiz mil jayegi...."bolkar main chup hua aur
yaad karne laga ki aur kuchh bolna baki hai ya phhir khisku yaha se....
"ek aur baat....aaj ke baad kisi se bhi pange mat lena aur yadi koyi senior intro
vagerah le toh shanti se de dena...kyunki ab main tujhe bachane nahi aane
wala...ab chalta hoon.all the best..."
iske baad main waha ek second ke liye bhi nahi ruka aur wapas tez kadmo ke sath
hostel ki taraf badha....kyunki main nahi chahta tha ki Aradhna mere peechhe aa
jaye....

168
"Wow ! Aradhna ka matter to badi aasani se sulajh gaya....usne to koyi react hee
nahi kiya. Mujhe aise hee ladkiya pasand hai,jo meri baat sune aur bas sune...koyi
jawab ya sawal na kare...."
Aradhna se break up karke hostel ki taraf jaa rahe Arman ko maine aawaz di…use
rokna chaha…taaki wo ruk jaye aur Aradhna se break up na kare… lekin ye
flashback tha…koyi time travel nahi…jo main kuch kar sakta tha…afterall wo main
hee toh tha…jisne abhi-abhi ek ladki ka dil dukhaya tha aur ek baar bhi palat kar
Aradhna ko nahi dekha tha…lekin Aradhna …wo ab bhi wahi khadi thi aur mujhe
hostel ki taraf jate hue dekhti rahi…wo waha bahut der tak khadi rahi…aur ant me
jab uske hostel ke chaukidar ne use andar aane ke liye kaha toh usne apni nazar
2.0 se hatakar meri taraf dekha….yes… meri taraf dekha…matlab version 3.0 ki
taraf dekha aur bahut tezi se daud kar mere paas aa gayi….
“kya sir…flashback….”
“what the….tu mujhe kaise dekh sakti hai…main toh yaha hoon hee nahi…”chauk
kar peechhe hat-te hue maine kaha...aur turant apni aankh band kar li….
“thank god…”bathroom me apni aankh kholte hue lambi-lambi saanse bharkar

maine kaha “ye Aradhna toh pagal kar degi mujhe…ye toh mere rom-rom me bas
chuki hai…kya iska koyi ilaaz nahi hai…aise me toh ye mujhe suicide bhi nahi
karne degi…”
Galti insaan ko ye dikhati hai ki usne kya galat kiya aur aage use kya nahi karna
chahiye lekin shayad main ye kabhi samajh hee nahi paya tha…warna Nisha ke
sath mera relation kabhi nahi banta aur na hee main Madhulika ke paas
jata…mera matlab mujhe kya zaroorat hai Ganga-Jamuna jakar Daddu se koyi
deal-veal karne ki…kya main koyi criminal hoon…ya phhir koyi aatankwadi
hoon…. seriously main kya karunga un 100 guns ka aur main kyun kar raha hoon
ye sab…mujhe chahiye ki main apne ghar jaun…gharwalo se maafi mangu aur jo
salah maine us din Varun ke bade bhai ko di thi us salah ko main bhi apnau…
Quote:
…..aap ghar jao…competitive exams ki taiyari karo aur exam clear karke apni life
track par le aao…this is the best you can do…
“yeah..this is the best I can do…”bathroom me jabran apne hath dhulte hue main
bola…jabki main ek baar already apne hath-pair dhul chuka tha.
“bitch please…You’re Arman…Shri Arman…”
“ correct…main Arman hoon…Arman 3.0 na ki Arman 2.0…tujhe yani ki Version

2.0 ko zindagi ne sab diya tha…friends, girlfriends, paisa, power, family ,
talent…lekin tune sab kuch barbaad kar diya… lekin main aisa nahi
karunga…main apne talent ka pura istemaal karunga…main abhi jakar
Mathematics ke pure topics revision marunga aur phhir Thermodynamic padhna
start kar dunga….”
“par bahar jo Aradhna hai…uska kya karega….”
“wo ab bahar nahi hogi…”

169
“sixth sense… check kar le…yadi Aradhna abhi bahar dikh gayi toh main ek hafte
tak nahi hilaunga….”
“done…”
“done…”
Main bahar aaya aur pure flat me Aradhna ko dhoondha lekin Aradhna kahi bhi
nahi thi… that’s Arman-3 for you…..bitches
Maine thermodynamics ka ebook khola aur syllabus ke according padhna shuru

kar diya…shuru-shuru me jab main padhne baitha tha tab raat ke 10 baje the aur
us samay meri andar energy peak par thi…lekin jaise-jaise samay beeta mera sar
bhari hota chala gaya…aur maine raat ke 2 baje bahar ghoomne ka plan
banaya….pahle toh maine do round river view colony ka lagaya lekin jab mera
mood phhir bhi thik nahi hua toh main colony se bahar nikal kar NH-6 ki taraf
daudte hue chala gaya….is samay mere paas mera katta bhi tha, isliye mujhe zara
sa bhi dar nahi lag raha tha ki koyi mujhe kuch kar dega…. Main full bindas me
NH-6 me night walking kar raha tha ki tabhi ek car bahut speed me aayi aur mere
paas se guzar gayi…
“Maaadharchod….”us car wale ko maine kaha aur phhir samne thodi doori par ek
ped ko dekh kar khud ko challenge kiya ki kya main us ped ko daudkar 8 seconds
me paar kar sakta hoon ?
Maine khud ko challenge kiya aur khud hee challenge accept bhi kar liya…
Chapter-17: Family, Friend and Basketball
“yeah…I did it…”us ped ko 8 seconds ke bheetar paar karne ke baad hafte hue
maine kaha aur ghutno par hath rakhkar jhuk gaya taaki thakan jaldi jaye….aur
tabhi door se aati hui ek car ne horn maarkar mujhe sadak se hatne ka sanket
diya….
“Arman se panga…abhi batata hoon…”
Sadak se hatne ke bajay ulta main aur beech me khada ho gaya aur meri taraf aati
hui car par maine gun taan di…
Jab main aisa kar raha tha toh mujhe yahi laga tha ki car wala ya car wali mere
hath me gun dekhkar dar ke mare apni car rok dega…jispar main do-teen
dialogues chipka kar use vida kar dunga…lekin jab se sadak ke beech-o-beech
khada hokar maine gun us aati hui car ki taraf kiya tha tab se us car ki speed aur
badh gayi thi….jisase meri fati aur maine fati me turant trigger daba diya…lekin
trigger chalate waqt mera hath kanpa aur goli pata nahi BC kis disha me gayi….ab
car ki speed aur bhi tez ho gayi thi,isliye maine jyada rolebazi na marte hue samne
se hatna hee behtar samjha….. lekin maine aisa kiya bilkul bhi nahi balki iske ulat
wahi beech sadak par khade hokar car ki taraf firing ki aur abki baar mera hath
na kaanpe isliye apne dusare hath se maine jis hath me gun pakda hua tha , use
170
pakad liya…. ab samajh aaya filmo me aise gun kyu pakadte hai, taaki nishana
correct baithe…
Jab Mere dwara dusari bullet fire karne ke baad bhi Car meri oor badh hee rahi thi
tabhi maine apni aankh band kar li , kyunki mujhe andaza ho chala tha ki ab ye
car mujhe udane wali hai… main chahta toh waha se hatkar in sabko rok sakta
tha…lekin main apne ego ke karan sadak ke beech-o-beech khada raha aur is
karname ko anzaam de diya….
“kya main zinda hoon… ? ”apni dayi aankh dheere-dheere kholkar maine samne
dekha aur khud se sawal kiya
“mujhe toh kuch nahi hua… kya mere andar koyi super power hai… ”apni dusari
aankh bhi dheere-dheere kholkar maine khud se sawal kiya aur tabhi kisi ke dard
se karahne ki aawaz mujhe sunayi di…maine apna rookh us aawaz ki taraf kiya….
“iski maa ka… ye kya kar diya maine… kya main itna strong hoon ki mujhse takra
kar car ghoom gayi…”
Kuch der pahle Jis car ke saamne main khada tha, wo car ab highway se neeche ek
ped se thuki hui thi aur uske andar baithe log dard se karah rahe the…. Main thodi
der jaha khada tha, wahi khada raha aur phhir sochne laga ki actual me kya hua
hoga….
“dusari Bullet maine car par chalayi thi jo seedhe jakar car me hee lagi aur car
mere tak pahuch pati uske pahle hee car mere bagal se bayi taraf mudkar ek ped se
takra gayi….. car wale ne mujhe nahi thokha…iske do karan ho sakte hai…pahla
karan ye ki bullet ke Car se contact hone par driver dar gaya hoga aur usne aanan-
fanan me Car dusari taraf ghuma di hogi…dusara karan ye ki bullet seedhe driver
ko lagi hogi aur uske hath se car ka steering ghoom gaya hoga…. Chalkar dekhta
hoon…”
.
Maine apna chehra roomal se bandha aur Katta apne hath me ghoomate hue ped se
takra chuki us car ke paas pahucha… main bade role se katta ghuma raha tha ,
jiske karan ek baar toh katta mere hath se gir bhi chuka tha…anyway, Car ke
andar total 5 log the aur sab launde hee the… jo nashe me full tunn the… waha car
ke andar unke aas-paas beer ki kayi botal padi hui thi….kuch khali , toh kuch bhari
hui aur kuch phooti hui…
“please don’t kill us…take the money or take whatever you want, whatever you
like… but don’t kill us… please, please”un paanch ladko me se ek ne mujhse kaha….
“great idea… chalo tum sab apna-apna batua nikalo…”katta unpar taante hue
maine kaha
Jiske baad un sabne bina kisi rok-tok ke apna-apna batau nikala aur bahar fek
diya….jiske baad maine un sabke batue se paise nikal kar batua unhe wapas kar
diya… kyunki unme unke ATM card, PAN card wagerah the….

171
“main tum log ko ek shart me zinda chhodunga…” Car ke andar khidki se hath
dalkar ek beer nikalte hue maine kaha “ jo-jo Taylor Swift I mean Taylor series ka
formula bata dega uski jaan main baksha dunga….”
“itna bada….form..form…formula kaun batayega…”aage wali seat par baitha ek

launda apni seat belt kholne ki koshish karte hue bola “wo toh humne third
semester me padha tha…”
“tu engineering kar rela hai kya…”
“hum sab Mechanical Engineering ke students hai…. Aur apne dost ka birthday
celebrate karke wapas ghar ja rahe the….”
“Engineering kar rahe ho... isliye jaan se nahi maar raha hoon… lekin ghar jakar
Taylor Series ka formula yaad zaroor kar lena….kal main tum logo ke ghar aakar
formula puchhunga”bolkar maine Car ke andar se ek aur beer ki botal uthayi aur
waha se bhagkar wapas apne flat me aaya….
“ maza aa gaya BC…. Ab roz NH-6 me jaunga aur logo ko lootunga… jisme mera
sath dega mera Katta… ”
“I am Arman, I have a Gun

I own this world, let’s begin the Fun….”
Room me Beer ki ek botal khali karne ke baad main chhat par pahucha aur net se
Nagpur ke Ex-MLAs ki list nikalne lag gaya….
“Sidharth Singh Bairangi…. Ye raha mera bakra… yahi hai wo jis-se Daddu uncle
ki bilkul nahi jamti… mujhe bas in dono ko bhidana hai. Taaki mera kaam aasan
ho jaye… wait, par main ye sab kyun kar raha hoon… oh, got it…”muskurate hue
maine mobile apne jeb me rakha aur phhir Vandana Rathi ki chhat ki taraf nazar
dali….
“kya bolta hai Arman…ek baar phhir ho jaye…”
“bilkul nahi…last time wala bhool gaya kya… kaise kutto ke mafiq gheesat-gheesat
kar R.Rathi ke flat se apne flat me aaya tha….”
“so what… Always Remember that A lion never stops after an unsuccessful hunt…”
“marwa ke hee rahega tu…”
“that’s two point zero for you…. My dear”
“chal phhir… ho jaye ek-ek jump… lekin helmet pahan ke…”
“sure…”
.
Maine apne sar me helmet lagaya aur apne flat se Vandana Rathi ke flat tak ki
doori ko measure karte hue apna sar khujane laga I mean helmet khujane laga….
172
Main thoda peechhe gaya aur daudkar apne flat se ek jump liya…. Abki baar mujhe
puri ummid thi ki main safal ho jaunga aur main safal ho bhi jata lekin meri jump
is baar bhi thodi si kam pad gayi aur mere sar ke sath meri puri body deewar se
takrayi aur deewar se takrane ke baad main pichhali baar ki tarah is baar bhi
Vandana Rathi ke garden me gira… dard mujhe ab bhi ho raha tha lekin pichhali
baar ki tulna me abki baar dard bahut kam tha…kyunki last time meri chhati E-5
ke chhat ke kinare se takrayi thi jabki baar aisa nahi hua tha… khair main thodi
der tak wahi naram-naram ghas par aankh band kiye hue leta raha aur jab dard
kuch normal hua toh aankh kholkar dono hath se apna helmet utara…. Lekin mere
hath is waqt itna kaanp rahe the ki sar se helmet nikalna bhi mere liye mushkil ho
raha tha…
.
Maine bahut mehnat ki helmet ko nikalne ki lekin jab maine helmet utara toh paya
ki eka-ek subah ho gayi hai…subah nahi…actually dopahar ho gayi thi…par phhir
jab maine waha pade-pade aas-paas gaur kiya toh paya ki actuyally abhi sham ka
samay hai…time yahi kuch 4-5 baje honge…. Aur toh aur ye jagah wo nahi
thi…jaha mujhe girna chahiye tha… ye jagah toh…. Ye jagah toh…. Mere ghar ke
paas wala ground tha..mujhe abhi dhang se kuch dikh bhi nahi raha tha…mera
matlab thodi der pahle mujhe sab kuch saaf dikhayi de raha tha… lekin ab sab kuch
dhundhala-dhundhala dikhayi pad raha tha… upar se waha bahut shor-sharaba
bhi ho raha tha... mujhe sab kuch dhundhala sa hee jaan pad raha tha ki mere kano
me kisi ki aawaz padi...
"Arman, bach... wo bat lekar tujhe marne aa raha hai..."
Maine apni aankh ek baar band karke ahiste se apni aankho ko sahlaya aur phhir
apni aankhe kholi….
“ab saaf dikhayi de raha hai…lekin ye kya…. koyi mujhe bat se marne wala hai…
iski toh… ”bolkar maine apni aankhe band kar li… lekin jab kuch der tak mujhe
kuch ahsaas nahi hua toh maine apni aankhe dobara kholi…
“what the… fuck. Pahle Vandana Rathi ka flat , phhir ghar ke paas wala ground
aur ab turant hee ek jhatke me main apne school ke basketball court me ? itni jaldi-
jaldi scene kaise change ho raha hai…lagta hai past ka recap mode activate ho
gaya hai…”
.
Main is samay apne school ke basketball court ke paas akele baitha hua tha aur
thodi der tak main wahi baithakar apne aaju-baju dekhne laga ki koyi yaha bhi toh
mujhe marne nahi aa raha hai aur jab thodi der tak waha koyi nahi aaya toh main
waha se khada hua aur school ke main gate ki taraf chal pada….Mera irada abhi
filhal school se bahar nikalne ka tha…lekin maine jaise hee school ke main gate se
bahar jaane ke liye apna pair uthaya mera pair hawa me hee rook gaya…meri puri
body jaise jam ho gaya ta… main apne sharir ka koyi bhi ang nahi hila pa raha
tha…yaha tak ki apni ek ungali bhi nahi mujhe aisa laga jaise bhagwan ne mujhe
statue bol diya ho aur us dauran jab mera pair hawa me atka hua tha tab…aasman
ka rang bahut tezi se badalne laga…school ki deeware achanak se chhoti-badi ho
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rahi thi…waha school ke paas jitney bhi ghar ya dukane thi…sabme koyi na koyi
changes ho hee rahe the…kisi ka color change hota toh kisi ka shape. sadak,
school…waha bane ghar aur dukane sab kuch meri aankho ke saamne tezi se badal
rahe the aur phhir eka-ek hawa me latka hua mera pair zameen me aaya par ab
main school me nahi tha…ab main apne ghar me khada tha….
Chaukte hue main apne ghar ki deewaro ko dekhne laga ki kahi ye bhi badal rahi
hai ya nahi… aur jab unme koyi parivartan nahi hua toh maine baki mahol pe
dhyan diya…jis-se mujhe pata chala ki mere mummy-papa ke sath mera bhai
saamne sofe par baitha hua hai aur main kisi mujrim ki bhaati unke saamne khada
tha…jis-se mujhe ahsaas hua ki zaroor maine aaj ke date pe koyi kaand kiya hoga
jiski peshi ghar par chal rahi hai… maine apne sar par apna hath firaya toh paya
ki mere sar me patti bandhi hui hai… yani ki meri zaroor kisi se ladayi hui hogi…
yaad aaya, wo ground me us ladke dwara mujhpar bat se hamla…..
“jawab dega… ya yun hee muh band kiye khada rahega….”Vipin bhaiya ne mujhse
kaha…
“jawab kya dena hai…hum log match khel rahe the aapke dosto se. aur jab wo
harne lage toh gaddari karne lage… jispar Varun ne aapke dosto ko gaddar kah
diya aur aapke wo sand jaise dost Varun ko marne lage…aur beech-bachav me
mujhe ye chot lag gayi…”
“tujhe hazar baar kaha hai ki Varun ke sath mat ghooma kar…lekin tu…”sofe se
uthkar mere papa ne mujhe ek tamacha jad diya….
“teri maa ka…”mann hee mann me maine kaha aur chup-chap sah liya…
“ye aise hee sudhrega papa… kuch log iski tarah laat khane wale hee hote hai jine
apne family ki izzat ki koyi parvah nahi hoti…”Vipin bhaiya ne kaha….
“Arman… tu kyun aisa karta hai… abhi pichhale hafte hee tere sar me chot lagi thi
aur aaj phhir tune….”bolte-bolte meri maa ruk gayi… kyunki is dauran mere papa
ne mere gaal par ek aur tamacha pel diya tha…
“teri maa ki maa ka…”dusara tamacha khane ke baad maine kaha…..lekin mann
me
“dekh beta… Varun acha ladka nahi hai…uske sath mat ghooma kar… tu humari
baat maan kyun nahi leta… teri sab ladayi uski vazah se hoti hai”

174
“mom… aapko pata hai, main pichhale kayi dino se soch raha tha ki Aisi kya vazah
ho sakti hai… jiske karan aap sab Varun se itna nafrat karte ho… mera matlab
Varun , Vipin bhaiya ke un sabhi langoor dosto se laakh guna acha hai…jinke sath
baithkar Vipin bhaiya Government school ke peechhe cigarette peete hai… kabhi
Vipin bhaiya ke dosto par gaur kiya hai…? unke dost bus stand me ladkiyo ko
chhedte hai…unse gali khate hai aur gali khane ke baad daant dikha kar haste
hai…atleast Varun aisa toh nahi karta. Papa aapko pata hai ki nahi par Varun
bhaiya ki ek girlfriend hai… jiska name toh abhi mujhe yaad nahi par main aapko
baad me bataunga… in dono ko maine apne hee ghar me kiss karte hue dekha hai…
isliye mujhse nazar hatao aur apne idol bete ki fikra karo…”
“Vipin tu ye sab karta hai… aise logo ke sath ghoomta hai… “Vipin bhaiya ko
jordar hadkate hue papa ne kaha aur main intezaar karne laga ki abhi…bas abhi
jaise mujhe do thappad pade waisich papa Vipin bhaiya ke bhi gaal laal kar
denge…. Lekin unhone Vipin bhaiya ko kuch nahi kiya… even thik dhang se fatkar
tak nahi lagayi….
“mujhe do diya hai…bhaiya ko kam se kam ek toh banta hai papa”
“tu bilkul chup rah aur Vipendra ye sab karta hai, iska matlab ye nahi ki tu bhi ye
sab karega….samjha…aaj ke baad yadi tu mujhe Varun ke sath dikha toh soch lena
Arman…puri 206 haddiya tod dunga teri”
“darasal, main ab puri tarah samajha ki aap sab Varun se itna nafrat kyun karte
ho…ab mujhe iska reason samajh me aaya hai…aap log Varun se nafrat karte ho
kyunki uski family humse jyada paisewali hai… uske dad ki pahuch aapse jyada
hai aur school ke har function me aapse pahle Varun ke papa ka samman kiya jata
hai… isiliye aap sab Varun se nafrat karte hai…nahi ye sahi word nahi
rahega…nafrat nahi…nafrat nahi….jalna…ye word perfect rahega…. Aap sab
Varun se jalte ho kyunki unki family humari family se jyada powerful hai…
common dad, grow up”
“teri himmat kaise hui dad ki insult karne ki…”Vipin bhaiya apni jagah se uthe aur
mujhe marne ke liye apna hath utha liya…
“last time tujhe school me bola tha na be… ki yadi tune ab aage se mujhpar kabhi
hath bhi uthaya toh MAA KASAM zinda gaad dunga…. Remember…theoretically
samajh nahi aaya lagta hai, practically samjhana padega”Vipin bhaiya ka hath
pakad kar unhe peechhe dhakka dete hue maine kaha
aur mere aisa karte hee mere papa ne meri jo thukayi start ki wo bahut der tak
chali aur usi thukayi ke dauran ek scene aisa aaya jisme mujhe marte hue mere
papa achanak rook gaye… bole toh same wahich situation jo kuch der pahle school
175
ke main gate se nikalte waqt thi…ek baar phhir se mere charo taraf ke drishya
bahut tezi se badalne laga…aur abki baar mera sar bhi ghoomne laga… mujhe aisa
laga ki mujhe chakkar aa rahe hai aur jab ye changing khatm hui toh main wapas
apne school ke basketball court me tha…. Lekin abki baar waha main akela nahi
tha…waha koyi match chal raha tha aur main, Varun ke sath waha court ke bahar
baitha us match ka anand le raha tha….
“tera sar kaisa hai, kafi chot lagi hai tujhe aur lawde tu has kyun raha hai… waise
thanks…tu beech me nahi aata toh jo zakhm abhi tere body par hai wo mere body
pe hote”
“sirf sar wala hota, baaki face wala bapu ne diya tha…kal sham ko…”
“tere baap ne tujhe itne bure tarike se mara…?”chauk kar mere chehre ke nishan ko
dekhte hue Varun ne kaha “Arman, tu apne baap par case kar de… main apne baap
se baat karu…?”
“yes…basket… apni team ab haar jayegi… yes…woooh… salo ne mujhe ye bolkar

team me nahi liya tha ki main cricket me dhyan doon…ab lawda le le, school
wale…. District level me hee sale bahar ho jayenge…”
“tune jawab nahi diya , tu bole toh apne baap se tere baap ke baare me baat
karu…”
“kis baare me… yessss…. Opponent team ne phhir se basket kiya…”
“wahi tere baap ke upar police case ke baare me…”
“the more pain we feel, stronger we become… par main kabhi-kabhi sochta hoon
ki…. yar, zindagi kitni simple hoti yadi hum family ke chutiyape me nahi padte
toh…. tujhe kya lagta hai kaun jeetega…aaj ka match”
“tu kab se itna interest lene laga basketball me… jaha tak main tujhe jaanta hoon
uske hisab se toh tu…..”
“if you think you know, you don’t know me at all…”Varun apni baat puri kar pata
uske beech me hee maine kaha “dekh beta… ye cricket-vricket toh koyi bhi khel leta
hai… lekin yadi ladkiyo ko impress karna hai toh basketball type ka game khelna
shuru kar de… jis-se Reema toh kya uski badi bahan Seema bhi tujhse pat
jayegi…”baithe-baithe ecliars chocolate khate hue maine Varun se kaha…. “is game
me bahut rola hai, zara dekh kaise wo tujhse bhi badsurat launda basketball khelte
hue smart lag raha hai…”
176
“bol toh sale aise raha hai… jaise khud bahut bada shurma ho is khel ka aur
pachaso ladkiya pata rakhi ho… ”
“toh shurma ban jaunga…main jab bhi is game ko dekhta hoon toh , aisa lagta hai
jaise main isi ke liye bana hoon… padhai toh main befaltu kar raha hoon… matlab
mere andar se mujhe ahsaas hota hai ki main bahut achchha basketball khel sakta
hoon… seriously , mujhe iske sapne bhi aate hai… jisme main toofan ki tarah
basketball khelta hoon…ab pata nahi wo main hee rahta hoon ya koyi aur…. aur tu
yakin nahi karega ki maine kabhi TV par is game ka ek match nahi dekha ,kabhi is
game ki rulebook nahi padhi….lekin mujhe iske pure niyam maloom hai…ye game
mere andar default app ki tarah hai….”
“aur wo kaise…”
“abhi bataya toh ki main sapne me ye game khelta hoon…bas wahi se… ab mera
tujhse ek sawal hai….Varun kya tujhe basketball court hilta hua dikhayi de raha
hai…”
“nahi toh…”
“chal phhir…… milte hai…..kuch din baad ya phhir…… kuch mahine baad ”khada
hokar Varun se hath milate hue maine kaha “good byyyyee aur…….. Sonam ki maa
ka bhosda…”
Maine Varun se itna kaha aur meri aankh apne aap ek pal ke liye band hui aur
phhir dusare hee pal turant meri aankh khuli….as expected main Vandana Rathi ke
gardan me gira pada tha…..
Chapter-18: Police at the door
“finally… bahar aa hee gaya… aaj toh sar hee ghoomne laga tha…”khada hote hue
main bola aur langda-langda kar Vandana Rathi ki boundary kood kar apne flat
me aaya…
“aakhir meri jump success kyun nahi ho rahi hai… upar se ek-do din ke liye phhir
book ho gaya…wo toh bhala ho ki maine helmet pahan rakha tha…warna sar foot
jata. Anyway… bolo Shri Arman ki…..”
“jai…”
.

177
Apne flat me aakar maine apna laptop khola aur Nagpur ke ex-mla Sidharth Singh
Bairangi se related news google me search karne laga…jisme mujhe pata chala ki
paanch din pahle Bairangi ji ke bête Rajak Singh Bairangi ki taalab me doobne se
maut ho gayi thi… ye news mere liye shocking thi… mere liye ye news jitni
shocking thi utni hee Bairangi ji ke liye dukhdayi… so sad.
Maine turant apne bistar par khade hokar Bairangi ji ke bete ki atma ki shanti ke
liye do minute ka maun dharan kiya aur phhir apna maun todne ke baad maine
detail me news padhi…. Jis-se mujhe pata chala ki Bairangi ji ka beta apne kuch
dosto ke sath Nagpur se outer me bane ek mandir me ghoomne gaya tha aur Jab
uske dost mandir ke andar hee the toh Bairangi ji ka launda josh-josh me taalab
me nahane utar gaya aur phhir wapas nahi aaya…
.
Thoda aur detail me padhne par mujhe pata chala ki Rajak ko saans ki bimari thi
aur shayad jab wo gahre paani me tha tab saans lene me kathinayi ke karan wo
tair kar bahar nahi aa paya aur jaha se phhir yumdooto ne use waha se bahar
nikal kar apne sath le gaye the… maine is news pe aur chhan-been ki tab mujhe
pata chala ki Bairangi ji ki biwi ko ye khabar milte hee heart attack aaya tha…par
filhal wo ab thik hai…lekin unka mansik santulan thik nahi hai aur ilaaz zari hai…
“Bairangi ki toh baj gayi… ye meri kya madad karega. khair abhi thermodynamic
ka ek chapter khatm kar leta hoon…aaj waise bhi kuch nahi padha .”
.
Bairangi ka masla band karke maine pdf khola aur jitni der tak padh sakta tha
padhta raha aur jab padhte-padhte mera sar ghoomne laga aur aankh jalne lagi
toh main wahi laptop ko kinare karke let gaya… lekin tabhi kisi ke sparsh ne mere
rongte khade kar diye….
“Aradhna…. Abhi main bahut thaka hua hoon… please thodi der baad aakar
darana…”apni aankh band kiye hue maine kaha
“lao…sir. Main aapka sar daba deti hoon…”
“ok…no problem… pata nahi in sabse kab mukti milegi… thoda dheere daba, sar
fod degi kya… kya main pagal ho gaya hoon ? koyi hai, jo iska jawab de sake… koyi
mahan purush ?”
“jawab toh bahut log de denge…sir…lekin aap unki baat manoge nahi…”mera sar
dabate hue Aradhna boli…

178
“tu marne ke baad bhi yaha hai…kyun ? kya tu mujhe marne aayi hai…”
“iska jawab toh mujhe bhi nahi pata sir… main yaha aayi kyunki aapne mujhe
bulaya… aap akele the ,isliye aapne mujhe yaha bula liya…”
“chal maine tujhe bulaya… lekin tu aayi kyun. Tu toh sab janti hai ki main kitna
bura insaan hoon aur sabse jyada dukh toh maine tujhe hee diya hai…phhir bhi tu
mere bulane pe aa gayi… kyun ?”
“pyar achchhayi ya burayi nahi dekhta sir… aap ab bhi Esha se pyar karte ho…ye
jaante hue bhi ki ab aap use zindagi me dobara nahi dekh paoge… “
“love is not lovable… ye hum dono hee jaante hai… by the way…thanks. Mujhe ab
neend aa rahi hai. Good Night”
“good night sir…”
“ise aise nahi bolte… pahle good bol phhir half second ka gap phhir Night…. Good
Night, just like hence proved…is-se feeling aati hai…. Matlab sunne walo ko aisa
lagta hai jaise ki is duniya me koyi toh aisa hai, jo uski bhalayi chahta hai… phhir
chahe meri tarah ye uska vaham hee kyun na ho”
“Good Night…sir”
.
Subah meri neend darwaje par kisi ke dastak dene se khuli… koyi bahut der se
mere flat ka darwaja peet raha tha… pahle toh maine ignore kiya lekin jab darwaje
par dastak nahi rooki toh main majburan apne bed se utha aur uthkar sabse pahle
ek glass paani pani piya aur phhir mootne bathroom me ghusa…Is dauran bahar
khada manushya mere flat ka gate lagatar peet-ta raha…
“aa raha hoon be… thoda sabra kar…”bolkar main bathroom se nikla aur bedroom
me ghusa… waha maine goggle lagaya aur phhir ek cigarette jalakar do-teen kash
mare aur phhir jakar gate khola….mere samne jo shaks is samay khada tha use
dekhkar mere mann me kayi sawal uthne lage the aur mere mann me uthne wale
un sawalo ke beech us shaks ne mujhse puchha…
“aple nav ”usne puchha shayad Marathi me…
“ name ? Shri Arman Version 3.0”

179
“Version aapka surname hai…”
“ sorry… aap kaun ?”
“vardi dekh kar samajh nahi aa raha kya… Police”
“police….”use upar se neeche dekhkar maine khud se kaha “kahi in logo ko kal raat
wale kaand ki khabar toh nahi lag gayi… ? lekin wo ladke mujhe pahchan kaise
gaye… maine toh apna chehra dhak kar rakha hua tha….”
“kya tumne apne aas-paas kisi aise ko dekha hai… jo tumhe ajeeb laga ho…”
“haan ,dekha hai…”
“kaun tha wo aur kaisa dikhta tha wo…”
“bilkul tumhari tarah… tumhari tarah police ki vardi pahne hue tha… tumhari
tarah mujhe neend se jaga kar mujhse un-necessary ke sawal puchh raha tha aur
uski vardi me bhi wahi name likha tha jo tumhari vardi me likha hai…I think ,wo
tum hee ho”
“kaye re… Tu maskari karatoyasa”thoda gusse se us policewale ne mujhse kaha…

jis par mere bagal wale flat yani ki E-5 se ek aawaz mere kaan me pahuchi...
“kya re Shiva Prasad…itnaa chilla kyun raha hai…”
“kahi vishes nahi, sir… ye,khali fokat me maskari raha hai…”
“idhar lekar aa use…”dusari taraf se aawaz aayi…jiske baad mere samne khade
hawaldar ne mera ek hath pakda aur mujhe waha se le jaane ki koshish karne
laga… lekin maine bhi apne ek hath se gate ke paas wali khidki me lagi rods ko
pakad liya, jiske karan wo ek kadam bhi aage nahi badh paya…. huh
“mujhe dum dikha raha hai… janta hai na ki main police me hoon”
“toh….? ”apne kandhe uchkate hue maine kaha….

180
“tujhe maloom hai ki main tujhpar police se bezzati karne ke ilzam me andar kar
sakta hoon…”
“mera sawal ab bhi wahi hai…..toh ?”
“Shriwas sir… ye nahi aa raha…”E-5 ki taraf muh karke bolte hue Shiva Prasad ne
kaha… jiske kuch der baad hee double star se saji vardi pahne hue ek nauzwan
mere flat me aaya…. Aur apne hawaldar se marathi me kuch puchhne laga….
“tum kya karte ho…”meri taraf dekh kar abki baar Shriwas ne puchha…
“gate nikalne ki taiyari me hoon main”apne ghar ke gate ko pakad kar jhoolte hue
maine kaha “mera matlab…gate ki taiyari aur sath me naukri ki taalash…
undercover agent ki zaroorat ho toh call karna”
“kya tumne is colony me kisi anjaan vyakti ko dekha hai… ya koyi aisa jispar
tumhe shaq ho…”
“main yaha pichhale ek saal se bhi jyada samay se rah raha hoon lekin phhir bhi is
colony ke sabhi log mere liye anjaan hai…I just hate everyone… toh main jaun..
mera matlab toh ab aap dono jao”peeche mudte hue maine kaha…lekin tabhi us
inspector ne mera kandha pakda aur bola…
“abhi main kuch puchh raha hoon na…”
“mera name Arman hai… main pahle isi colony me apne ek dost ke sath rahta tha.
Maine Nagpur aakar kayi companies me job ki lekin sabne mujhe mere kharab
bartaav ke karan mujhe nikal diya… isliye maine ab socha hai ki mujhe koyi
government job karni chahiye taaki mera future secure ho jaye…. Maine kal puri
raat padhayi ki aur kuch der pahle hee soya tha ki tum logo ne aakar jaga diya…
ab yadi aapki permission ho ,Shriwas sir… toh main jakar apni neend complete kar
loon… kyunki mera sar is waqt kisi boiler ke mafiq bahut jyada garam hai aur yadi
maine ise thanda nahi kiya toh ye fat jayega aur rahi baat kisi ajnabi ko jan-ne
pahchan-ne ki toh main yaha sirf do logo ko janta hoon… ek toh Mr. Desai aur
dusara Sidharth Singh Bairangi…. Actually Bairangi ji ne hee mujhe yaha room
dilwaya hai... baki main kisi ko nahi janta. sooo…… get lost”
“kitna bolta hai be…”kutto jaisi shakl bana kar Shriwas bola “chal acha jaa aur
dekh ke, kisi ne bagal wale flat ka kuch din pahle khidki tod diya tha aur kal raat
koyi chori-chhupe uske ghar me bhi aaya tha, jiska helmet wahi chhoot gaya tha…
be careful. Yaha pahle bhi bahut choriya ho chuki hai…”

181
“thank you… Mr. Shriwas.. main iska khayal rakhunga…”banawati muskan ke

sath unhe vida karte hue maine darwaza band kiya aur goggle utarkar kaha “toh
R.Rathi ne police bulwayi hai… main bhi kitna bada chodu hoon jo helmet uske
garden me hee chhod diya tha… ab toh police raat me idhar round maregi… kahi
mujhe pakad na le… warna kya jawab dunga ki… raat ko 2-3 baje main chhat
koodne ki practice kar raha tha…?”
“why fear… when 2.0 is here…”
“chup be… tere chakkar me pada toh phhir se jail jaana padega .upar se ab koyi
bachane wala bhi nahi hai…”
Main thodi der tak darwaje ke paas khada raha aur jab mujhe police jeep ke waha
se jaane ki aawaz sunayi di toh maine ahiste se apna gate khola aur apna sar
neeche karke bahar nikla aur E-5 & E-6 ki jo common boundary wall thi waha
jakar neeche baith gaya…. Maine bahut der tak dusare taraf hone wali kisi bhi
aawaz ko sunne ki koshish ki aur yahi karte hue taqriban 15-20 minutes tak main
waha boundary wall ke paas baitha raha…. Mujhe nahi pata ki main aisa kyun kar
raha tha. Lekin jab se police wale ne mere ghar me dastak di thi… mera dil joro se
dhadak raha tha… mujhe dusari taraf se kayi aawaz sunayi di jaise ki kisi bartan
ke girne ki aawaz… nal se pani girne ki aawaz… aur kisi gadi ke rukne ki aawaz…..
maine dhyan se suna toh paya ki koyi gadi ruki aur uske thode der baad boundary
ka gate khula.
“Vandana Rathi akele rahti hai ya koyi aur bhi uske sath rahta hai… uthkar dekhta
hoon ki kaun aaya hai… lekin yadi usne mujhe dekh liya toh… ?”
“toh kya… kya ukhad legi…”
“phhir dekhu…”
“yes…”
“thik hai phhir…”
Maine wahi neeche baithe-baithe hee palti markar apna chehra Rathi ke flat ki
taraf kiya aur dheere-dheere uthne laga aur boundary wall ki oot se chhipkar E-5
par ek nazar mari… waha bahar koyi nahi tha… lekin BC maine toh just abhi-abhi
gate ke khulne ki aawaz suni aur E-5 ke bahar ek car bhi khadi hai, jo Vandana
182
Rathi ki nahi hai… yani koyi toh aaya hai. Lekin kaun ? …….. wait. Par mujhe is-se
kya…? Main toh Arman The Great hoon…Mujhe kya lena-dena ki Vandana Rathi se
kaun-kaun milne aata hai…? Mera toh sirf ek hee maqsad hai… wo hai, iski maa
chodna… jo main chod ke rahunga.
“ab heartbeat normal hai… chal chalkar daru peete hai…”
seena taankar main bina dare khada hua aur jeebh me ungali fasakar do-teen tez
seeti mari… lekin jab E-5 me koyi harqat nahi hui toh main wapas apne flat me
ghus gaya aur mere dimag me jo is samay hot topic tha wo tha…Sidharth Singh
Bairangi aur uska marhoom beta… maine dhada-dhad black dog ke teen peg mare
aur bistar par 4 feet ki doori se kooda
“according to news… Bairangi ka ladka apne dosto ke sath ghoomne gaya tha. Aur
wo asthama ka mariz bhi tha. Jiske karan tairate waqt jab wo mandir ke paas
bane bade se taalab ke beecho-beech tha tab saans lene me dikkat hone ke karan
wo doob kar mar gaya. Ye toh hai news ki story…. Dimag laga Arman… apna
detective mode activate kar… is hatya ki gutthi ko suljha… ise aptitude ka question
samajh aur solve kar de. Yadi tune ise solve kar diya toh tere liye naye darwaje
khul jayenge…. Lekin kaise ? ise solve karne ke liye mujhe kuch logo ki details
chahiye… jo mujhe police wale denge nahi aur Bairangi ji se yadi is bare me baat
karunga toh wo mujhe jaan se marwa dega…. Lekin yahi ek raasta hai, jiske jariye
main apne upar hone wale police case me Bairangi ki madad le sakta hoon. Ek
kaam karta hoon… kuch din baad Bairangi ke paas jaunga. Phhir jo hoga dekha
jayega”
Iske baad maine ek cigarette jalaya aur bistar se neeche hath jhulakar bina koyi
kash liye Madhulika ke bare me soch-vichar karne laga….
“Madhulika… pata nahi kaisi aurat hai. Use dekhkar samajh hee nahi aata ki wo
mujhe pasand karti hai ya nafrat…. Waise main chahta hoon ki wo mujhse nafrat
kare… isiliye toh uske sath itna bura bartaav karta hoon. Lekin kuch bhi ho…uske
sath maza bahut aata hai… jab main apna lund uske muh me deta hoon , jab main
apna lund uske gaal par ragadta hoon toh bahut anand aata hai… us waqt aisa
lagta hai jaise ki zindagi ka sara maza sirf lund chuswane me hai…”
Par zindagi ka sara maza sirf lund chuswane me nahi hai , logo ki gand marne me
bhi hai aur ye maza tab aur badh jata hai, jab raat ho aur aapke hath me gun
ho…isliye aadhi raat ko chehra dhak-kar hath me katta liye main NH-6 ke beech-o-
beech khada tha….main kafi der tak waha sadak ke beech-o-beech shanti se khada
raha aur jab thoda time ho gaya toh dimag me aaya ki , chalo ab dusara pose dete
hai….
aaj yaha ka mahol kuch thanda-thanda sa tha mera matlab aaj bahut heavy
vehicle nikal rahe the aur unse chhedkani karne ka mera koyi irada nahi tha…upar
183
se police ki jeep bhi waha do round mar chuki thi. NH-6 me main bahut der tak
road par ghoomta raha, sadak ke beech-o-beech khada hokar tarah-tarah ke pose
marta raha aur jab mujhe mera shikar nahi mila toh wahi road se thodi door me
baithkar apne escape plan ke baare me sochne laga ki yadi by chance police ne
mujhe pakad liya ya mera peechha kiya toh main kya karunga, kidhar
bhagunga…. main wahi sadak se thodi door jhadiyo ki oot me baitha aur ek patli si
lakdi lekar zameen par apna escape root banana laga…
“maan lo ki north-south me NH-6 highway hai aur East-west ko alag karti

hai.main is waqt East me baitha hoon aur highway ke dusari taraf yani ki west me
meri colony hai.jiske thik samne highway ke dusari taraf jungle hai….ab yadi main
jungle se thoda peechhe south directon me jaunga toh mujhe ek basti milegi…jaha
wo do chor rahte hai, jinka saman maine loot liya tha.us basti ke thik samne sadak
ke dusari taraf yani ke west wale portion me bhi ek basti hai aur uski aage ek river
hai jo riverview colony aur us basti ko alag karti hai….chalo maan lo ki police ne
mujhe abhi yahi par gher liya, tab main pahle seedhe jungle ki taraf bhagunga aur
phhir jungle ke raaste hote hue choro ki basti me pahuch jaunga….waha ki galiyo
me police ko chakma dekar road ke is paar bane basti me aaunga….phhir nadi me
koodkar tairte hue nadi paar karunga aur river view colony me aakar E-6 me
aaram karunga.mere daudne ki speed bahut jyada hai aur mera stamina bhi….is
tarah police kabhi mujhe nahi pakad payegi aur yadi meri mathematics sahi hai
toh police mere peechhe maximum choro ki basti tak hee aa payegi unless police ko
mera pura plan pata ho ya phhir Shri usain bolt Maharashtra Police me join ho
jaye. baki unka shaq mera peechha karte hue us choro ki basti me rahne wale logo
par hee jayega.wo kabhi soch hee nahi payenge ki NH-6 ka sabse bada lootera
River View Colony me rahta hai….par is-se ek fayda bhi hoga. choro ki basti me
rahne wale kayi choro ka, jo NH-6 me loot-maar karte hai, unka police safaya kar
degi…kitna risk leta hoon main is duniya ki bhalayi ke liye, lekin phhir bhi kisi ko
meri kadra nahi hai…. idhar main yaha NH-6 me lambe-lambe kand karunga aur
udhar police apne most wanted list ke choro ka safaya karegi…. phhir main NH-6
ka aakhiri lootera bachunga…lekin…ye lawda, kaun hai…. jo car se mootne utara
hai… abhi pelta hoon ise, sala mujhe lund dikha raha hai”
Update-61
Quote:
kitna risk leta hoon main is duniya ki bhalayi ke liye, lekin phhir bhi kisi ko meri
kadra nahi hai…. idhar main yaha NH-6 me lambe-lambe kand karunga aur udhar
police apne most wanted list ke choro ka safaya karegi…. phhir main NH-6 ka
aakhiri lootera bachunga…lekin…ye lawda, kaun hai…. jo car se mootne utara
hai… abhi pelta hoon ise, sala mujhe lund dikha raha hai”
Main abhi apna escape plan bana raha tha ki ek car mujhse thoodi door me ruki
aur us car se ek aadmi mootne ke liye neeche utra, jise dekhkar mera rom-rom
khushi se machal utha…wo aadmi jaha khada hokar moot raha tha, main ahiste-
ahiste uske paas gaya aur peechhe se ek kohni uske sar par pura dum lagakar
mara….
“sale, mujhe lund dikhata hai…”

184
“kaun hai be madarchod…teri bahan ka tana…bhadwe…”dard se apni aankhe band

kar apna sar sahlate hue us aadmi ne mujhe pyar se kaha…
“tere ko bhi same dialogue…”katta nikal kar maine kaha “chal seedhe se apun ko
apnda batau de”
“tujhe pata hai ki main kaun hoon...”
“dekh bidu, apun ka time khoti mat kar…warna abki baar goli marunga…”katta
uspar taante hue maine kaha…jispar usne apne dono hath khade kar diye….wo
kafi der tak aise hee apne hath hawa me kiye chup-chap khada raha aur main uske
batau nikalne ka intezaar me tha
“wallet kaun tera baap nikalega…bosdike.jo kuch bhi tere jeb me hai na… wo sab
kuch bahar kar de nahi toh is bandook ki sari goli main tere andar kar dunga…tu
apun ko jaanta nahi abhi…”
“ok…ok….goli mat chalana please, main sab kuch deta hoon…”bolkar usne apne jeb
ka sara saman nikal kar zameen par rakh diya…jisme kuch 100 ki aur 500 ke note
the…usne apna mobile bhi neeche rakh diya tha….
“iPhone…par ye mujhe nahi chahiye…ise tu utha aur door fek…”
“par kyun….”
“taaki tu mere jaane ke baad kisi ko phone na laga sake…chal fek.”
“ok…ok”
“very good…ab pure paise utha kar mere hath me de aur yaad rahe koyi gand-
masti nahi…koyi chalaki nahi.”use paise uthane ke liye bolkar maine us-se puchha
“car me aur kaun hai…”
“car me…car me koyi nahi hai…”
“chodu mat bana…jhadi me chhipkar maine sab dekh liya tha ki tere aalawa bhi
car me koyi hai…”
“wo meri biwi hai…”
“maal hai kya..”
“kya…”
“arey bosdike….tere biwi maal hai kya….”
“thodi-thodi…”kuch der sochne ke baad wo bola
“thik hai, phhir…apne gang ko bulata hoon, aaj maza hee aa jayega…”

185
“please , don’t do this.tumhe jo chahiye tha…wo toh maine tumhe de diya.tum kaho
toh pure jewellery tumhe de du…lekin please meri biwi ko pareshan mat karna….”
“ek shart par…mera matlab ek sawal par, main teri biwi ko chodunga….i mean
chhodunga”
“mujhe manzoor hai….”
“toh phhir ye bata ki Marvel wale IRON MAN 4 kyun nahi bana rahe, jabki wo
unka sabse successful hero hai…tujhe gussa nahi aata kya ,ye dekhkar….ki side
role karne wala Captain America , CIVIL WAR me iron man ko hara diya….i mean
seriously…yar,main toh ye dekhkar suicide karne wala tha, lekin kyunki pirates of
Caribbean ki fifth installment aa rahi hai isliye apna plan drop kar diya…chal
mujhe reason bata ki Iron Man 4 kyu nahi aa rahi….warna teri biwi ke sath main
ab tujhe bhi chodunga….”
“I don’t know…”apne dono hath mere samne jodte hue usne kaha “mujhe nahi
pata,please hume jaane do….tum chaho toh sari jewellery le lo…paise le lo…lekin
hume chhod do….please”
“bol ki tera favorite hero Robert Downey Jr. hai….”
“mera favorite hero Robert Downey Jr. hai…”
“ek aur baar bol…”
“mera favorite hero Robert Downey Jr. hai…”
Maine gun uski kanpatti par taani aur use car ki taraf chalne ke liye kaha…wo
pahle toh bahut dheere-dheere chal raha tha lekin phhir maine jab use hadkaya toh
uski speed thodi tez hui…wo car ke paas pahucha aur seat belt baandkar so rahi
apni biwi ko dheere-dheere aawaz dekar uthane laga….lekin uski biwi thi ki uth
hee nahi rahi thi….kuch der tak toh maine intezaar kiya ki… ab uthegi….ab uthegi
lekin wo uthi hee nahi, upar se police ke aane ka dar ki kahi wo round par na aa
jaye….
“itna dheere-dheere kyun bol raha hai be…tez se bol.mere paas itna hee kaam nahi
hai bas….abhi jakar Thermodynamic ke do chapter bhi khatm karne hai…”
“Richa….Richa....”dheere se apni biwi ka name pukarte hue carwale ne apni biwi

ko hilaya… lekin uski biwi Sali, abki baar bhi nahi uthi…
“ye Sali police se pakadwayegi….. tu hat samne se…”use dhakka dekar maine
samne se hataya aur gehri neend me so rahi uski biwi ke gaal par jor se ek
tamacha jad diya…jis-se wo sak-paka kar uthi…
“what rubbish…”neend se jagkar mujhe dekhte hue wo tez aawaz me boli, jispar
maine apna ek hath khidki se andar dala aur ek tamacha aur mara…
“hiiii, main NH-6 ka Thug hoon…maine tumhare husband ke kanpatti me bandook

taan rakhi hai aur jitni jaldi tum apni jewellery utar kar mujhe dogi,utni jaldi
186
main tumhe yaha se jaane dunga…and please, no argument…. Warna teen din se
mutth nahi mara hoon aur mera khada hai… upar se tera cleavage bhi mujhe dikh
raha hai…got it ? now give it ?”
“Richa…ye jo mang raha hai, ise de do…”
“par Sumit, ye maine last week hee kharidi hai…”
“arey de de…main dobara kharid dunga…”
“ok…”
Car ke andar baithi us aurat ne apni puri jewellery mujhe de di.shuru-shuru me

toh maine dhyan nahi diya par jab wo jewellery utar rahi thi tab maine use dhyan
se dekha aur paya ki wo toh ekdum tanch maal hai aur kisi bhi angle se is
chapadganju ki biwi nahi lagti….maine jewellery apne pocket me rakhi aur car ke
aage wale tyre par goli chala kar bola…
“kya name hai be tera, idhar aa….”
“Sumit…”
“Sumit...huh, bakwas name.Sumit, tu khud ko dekh aur apni biwi ko dekh…sale
kaha wo khoobsurat , tanaka maal aur kaha tu…takle. Tere jaise laundo ke karan
hee mere jaise smart aur handsome ladke maal nahi pata pate…chal murga ban…”
“par tumhe jo chahiye tha, wo toh maine de diya…ab toh hume jaane do…”
“murga banta hai ya phhir teri biwi ka gang-bang karwau…chal ban jaldi
murga…”
Use aadhi raat me beech sadak me murga banakar maine uski biwi ki taraf apna
rookh kiya aur bola
“dekho janeman tum bahut dhansu dikhti ho aur privacy ki vazah se main apna
chehra tumhe nahi dikha sakta…par tum ye jaan lo ki main bhi ekdum dhansu
dikhta hoon..is takle ko chhodo aur mere type kisi hoshiyar ladke ko fasao….ye
bahut fattu hai aur mujhe offer de raha tha ki ise chhodne ke badle me ye mujhe
tumhare sath sex karwa sakta hai…lekin jab maine mana kar diya toh ye itna
neeche gir gaya ki isne apni gand ka bhi mujhe offer de diya…isliye is gandmare ko
chhod dena…bye…aur ek baat police ko mat batana ki main yaha se thodi door
choro ki basti me rahta hoon aur mere hatho ke beech-o-beech chaku ghusne ka
nishan hai… mere gang me do log hai… please ye sab baate police ko mat
batana….”
Chapter-19: The Game of doors
There are two exits in my home but I often get confused that which one is beginning
and which one is ending……..
Kal raat ki loot ke baad dusare din main subah utha aur kal raat ke kand ko yaad
karte hue bahar ka darwaza khola, par wo darwaza bahar jaane ka nahi tha..wo

187
toh bathroom ka darwaza tha. apni galti ka ahsaas hone par maine bathroom ka
darwaza band kiya aur main gate ki taraf chalkar bahar jane wala gate khola….
“arey yar, ye toh kitchen ka darwaza hai….tera dimag kaha hai…”
“sorry….sorry….”khud se maafi mafte hue main peechhe ghooma aur phhir finally
apne flat ka main gate khola…
“abey andha hai kya…ye toh bedroom ka darwaza hai…kya chutiyapa kar raha
hai.dimag kaha hai tera…”
“ sorry…again”
Maine bedroom ka darwaza band kiya aur phhir waha se bahar aakar ek naya
gate khola…par wo darwaza bhi mere flat ka main gate nahi tha…maine phhir se
apne bathroom ka gate khol diya tha….maine phhir se use band kiya aur dusara
gate khola..
“ye toh kitchen hai…next wala pakka main gate hoga…”
“fuck…ye toh phhir se main bedroom me pahuch gaya…”
Aur aisa bahut der tak repeat hota raha…main, bahar wale gate ko kholne ke
chakkar me baar-baar kabhi bathroom ka gate kholta toh kabhi kitchen ka aur
phhir lautkar wahi pahuch jata, jaha se main chala tha…yaani ki bedroom
me…phhir jab maine ispar gaur kiya aur phhir apna dimag lagaya toh mujhe pata
chala ki ye sab kuch sequence me ho raha hai…pahle bathroom…phhir kitchen aur
aakhiri me bedroom.main bahut der tak isi chakkar me apne flat ke andar
ghoomta raha aur bahar jaane ka gate dhoondhata raha…par wo muhjhe nahi
mila…
“lagta hai, yaha se bahar jaane ka koyi gate hee nahi hai…”
“achchha…toh phhir Ganga-Jamuna kya gand ke raaste gaya tha…”
“mere khayal se maine yaha teleport karne ka system bana liya hoga”
“chup be chutiye…aur bahar jaane ka raasta dhoondh…mujhe ab andar ghutan ho

rahi hai”

188
“mera bhi dum ghut raha hai…”lambi-lambi saanse bharkar maine kaha “actually
, mujhe yaad nahi ki bahar jaane ka darwaza kaun sa hai…par mere paas ek plan
hai…”
“kaise plan…”
“abhi maine bedroom ka darwaa khola tha….hai na”
“wo bedroom nahi…bathroom tha…”
“wo bathroom tha ? no problem…toh ab jo main next darwaza kholunga…wo

sequence ke according kitchen hoga…”agla darwaa kholkar main bola “see…ye
kitchen hai aur ab agla darwaza jise main main gate samajh kar kholunga wo
mujhe bedroom le jayega…..”
“toh…ye toh phhir se repeat hua..tera plan kaha hai…?”
“bedroom pahuchkar waha se main ek marker pen uthaunga aur har darwaje par
likh dunga ki wo kaha jane ka darwaja hai…”
Bedroom me ghuskar maine marker pen uthaya aur bedroom wale gate par BDR
likha…isi tarah maine bathroom ke darwaje par BTR aur kitchen ke darwaje par
KTCHN likha aur phhir pure flat me ek nazar mari toh mujhe do darwaje aise dikhe
jispar kuch nahi likha hua tha…jisme se ek flat ke agwade me khulta tha toh
dusara pichhwade me….
“woh…finally… bahar aa hee gaya…Sonam ki maa ki choot, David ki maa ka

bhosda…pura dimag hila diya isne…ab thoda achchha lag raha hai”goggle lagakar
maine kaha aur chhat par jakar apna headache kam karne ke liye dhada-dhad
cigarette peene laga…….ddc, just found new abbreviation - dhada-dhad cigarette
just like ddg- dhada dhad goal.
“kal raat jo maal udaya hai, wo 2-3 lakh ka toh hoga hee…khamkha main aaj tak
naukri dhoondhane me laga hua tha…. ye dhandha set hai apun ka…”
“ab aage kya…bechega kaha usko…”
“Daddu hai na, tujhe kya lagta hai ki meri koyi planning nahi hai…beta tu soch bhi
nahi sakta ki main kya-kya soch sakta hoon…Daddu mere chori ke maal ko bechne
ka kaam karega….”
189
“Daddu tera sath isliye de raha hai kyunki tune use 100 katta kharidne ka vaada
kiya hai yaanki ki 15 lakhs .jis din Daddu ko maloom chala ki tu use chutiya bana
raha hai us din tera kya hoga…. wo din tera aakhiri din hoga”
“wo din mera nahi Daddu ka aakhiri din hoga aur Ganga-Jamuna walo ko Daddu
se mukti mil jayegi...mahan log aise hee hote hai, wo bura bhi kare toh kuch na
kuch achchha ho hee jata hai…”
“good…phhir Ganga-Jamuna ke log tujhe Arman The Great ke name se janenge….”
“sounds khool…”
.
“Arman tummm…..aur yaha E-6 me”
“ye teri aawaz ko kya hua…laundiyo jaisi aawaz kyun sunayi pad rahi hai
mujhe…”maine mann hee mann me khud se kaha
“oh hello, main tumse baat kar rahi hoon…”
“iski maa ka…ye toh koyi external object ki dhwani hai…”badbadate hue main
aawaz ki taraf muda aur jaise hee saamne dekha mere pairo tale zameen khisak
gayi I mean mere pairo tale chhat khisak gayi… mere samne yani ki E-5 ki chhat
me Vandana Rathi full shocked hokar meri taraf dekh rahi thi….jispar maine bhi
shoked hone ka natak kiya…maine apni aankhe thodi badi ki, thoda sa apna muh
khola aur chehre par shocked wala expression lakar bola…
“Vandana mam, aap yaha rahti hai…? E-5 me…?what a pleasant surprice…I mean,
kamal hee ho gaya na ki…. jis-se main itni nafrat karta hoon wo mere bagal me
rahti hai…”
“mind your language…”
“mind your business…”aadhi jali cigarette Vandana Rathi ke chhat par fek-kar
maine kaha aur phhir usi ke saamne do cigarette nikala aur dono ko ek sath
jalakar ek sath hee dono cigarette ka kash mara aur dhua chhodkar Vandana
Rathi ki taraf dekha “dekha mera stunt… Good Morning”

190
“it’s afternoon…”
“kya fark padta hai, main toh good night me bhi Good Morning bol deta
hoon…mere liye kya subah aur kya sham…mere liye ye samay koyi mayne nahi
rakhta.main chahu toh time ko extend kar sakta hoon…reduce kar sakta hoon even
kuch pal ke liye rok bhi sakta hoon…main ab tum logo ki tarah ordinary nahi
hoon, main ab 4 dimensional ho gaya hoon…you ordinary, three dimensional
people in short, main hee samay hoon….waise,aaj aap kaam pe nahi gayi”
“aaj Sunday hai"
"sunday ? kya fark padta hai..ki aaj sunday hai ya monday, jab se aapne meri
naukri chhudwayi hai...tab se mera har din funday hai"
"aur tum samay ho matlab…main kuch samjhi nahi”
“ye sab psychological baate hai , aap nahi samjhogi…”
“main ab bhi kuch nahi samjhi….”
“dekha…maine kaha tha na ki kuch nahi samjhogi… anyway,jo main kahna chahta
hoon wo ye ki…time….time is the most powerful weapon of mankind and we are
wasting it by doing 9 to 5 job…? apne aas-paas dekhiye, mam… sab yaha kya kar
rahe hai… aapko kya lagta hai ki bhagwan ne insano ko isliye banaya taaki wo 9
to 5 job kar sake…?”
“tum bhagwan par yakin nahi karte, hai na… are you an atheist”
“I’m not an atheist. I believe in god because I always need someone whom I can
blame for my bad deeds..for my bad decisions and guess what, he never said a
word… not a single word... he never got frustrated, he never abused me back…. So I
analysed these data and got a result…”
“interesting and what was the result…”
“the result”
“hmm…the result, what was the result…”
“the result was……..God is either very kind or very cruel”
Aur meri ye line sunkar Vandana Rathi jaha thi, jaise thi… waise hee rahi. Mano
uske liye samay rook gaya ho, usne mujhe jo dekhna chalu kiya toh bahut der tak
dekhti rahi… jis-se mujhe shaq hua ki kya main abhi itna smart dikh raha hoon ya
phhir Vandana Rathi bhi meri tarah 4th dimensional me badal rahi hai ? main
thodi der tak intezaar karta raha ki…Vandana Rathi ab normal hogi…ab normal
191
hogi…ab normal hogi… lekin wo toh normal ho hee nahi rahi thi… pata nahi mere
dialogue me aisa kyat ha, wo toh maine aise hee bol diya tha aur phhir Vandana
mam ko wapas lane ke liye maine Vandana mam ko dekhkar aankh mari…jiska
asar unpar hua aur wo wapas vartman me aayi…
“sorry, wo aapko wapas present me lane ke liye aankh mari thi… its apun’s style”
“no problem… tum kuch kah rahe the”
“main kah raha tha ki jisko dekho wo paise kamane ki hod me hai…yadi aapke
paas paise hai toh gali ka kutta bhi aapki izzat karega aur yadi aapke paas paise
nahi hai toh phhir aapke maa-baap ke liye aapke aur us gali ke kutte me bhi koyi
fark nahi rahega… anyway… main chiz toh batana bhool hee gaya …wo main tha
jisne aapke ghar ka kaanch toda aur mera hee helmet aapke flat ke garden me mila
tha… uske liye sorry…mera helmet wapas kar dena… thank you and good day”
.
Vandana Rathi ke samne badi-badi baate karke aur use confuse karke main neeche
aaya.mera hamesha se aisa manna hai ki yadi ladki ko patana hai toh use confuse
kar do… is-se wo jyada attract hoti hai, jiska best example Nisha thi….maine use
patane me kuch khas nahi kiya… humari bas chhoti-chhoti mulaqat hui aur wo
mujhse confuse hote-hote mujhse pat gayi… Nisha chahe kaisi bhi rahi ho par thi
bahut cute…aksar bolte rahti thi ki marne ke baad hum dono swarg jayenge aur
waha ice-cream khayenge… ab use kaun bataye ki swarg ka mera patta toh kayi
saal pahle hee kat chuka hai…. chhat se neeche aane ke baad jab mujhe realize hua
ki maine Rathi ko kya bola tab main dua karne laga ki Vandana Police ko na
bataye….sala flow-flow me jo muh me aaya sab bol gaya…
Mere flat me bahar nikalne ke do raste the…ek aage wala aur ek peechhe wala aur
abhi main waha un dono darwaje ke ekdum beech-o-beech khada hokar ye soch
raha tha ki bahar jaane wala kaun sa hai matlab saamne ki taraf bahar jaane wala
kaun sa hai….mere pure flat me kul 5 darwaje the jisme se teen par maine marker
pen se marking kar di thi aur ab aise do hee darwaje bache the jinpe maine
marking nahi ki thi aur wo dono hee flat se bahar le jaate the…….. shayad.
par sawal ye tha ki unme se aage wala kaun sa hai aur peechhe wala kaun sa hai
aur dusara sawal jo hai wo ye ki main aaj itna confuse kyun ho raha hoon…kahi ye
kal raat do baar mutth marne ka side effect toh nahi….par kal raat toh maine
mutth mara hee nahi…ya mara tha ? kamal hai, aisi chize main kaise bhool sakta
hoon, wo bhi jab do baar kiya ho tab ?
“ek minute…abhi check karta hoon…”bolkar maine bf me mobile chalaya…mobile

me bf chalaya aur uske according jaisa mere body ka reaction tha , us-se main is
conclusion par pahucha ki kal raat maine mutth….
“mara tha…ab sure hai”
Aur ye sure karne ke baad mere samne phhir se wahi sawal tha ki in do gate me se
kaun sa beginning hai aur kaun sa ending…

192
“abey gate khol kar dekh kyun nahi leta ki kaun sa beginning hai aur kaun sa
ending….”
“no…never…yadi main aisa karunga toh mere fans meri kabiliyat par shaq
karenge…isliye mujhe is mystery ko dimag ke through hee solve karna
padega…mujhe sochne de…main just abhi-abhi main gate se andar aaya hoon yani
ki peeche wala darwaja beginning hai…wait…flat ke andar aakar main kitchen me
ghusa tha aur phhir ek glass pani peekar yaha khada ho gaya…yani ki mere
peeche wala darwaja beginning nahi, balki ending hai…par mujhe aisa kyun lag
raha hai ki kitchen se paani peene ke baad main bathroom bhi gaya tha…uske
according toh mere peeth ke peechhe wale darwaje ko beginning hee hona
chahiye…bahut confusion hai yar….kaise solve karu ise…koyi formula…koyi
concept”apna sar masalte hue main apne dimag ko check karne laga aur tabhi
mere dimag ki batti jali….
“arey lawda….kitchen ke paas wala darwaja is flat ka ant hai…bhool gaya kya.
Itni mamooli si baat sochane me itna time ”
“aakhirkar…darwajo ka ye khel khatm hua….”deewar par khud ke banaye

calendar par marker se aaj ki tareekh par gola lagate hue maine kaha… “time table
ke mutabiq mujhe abhi khana khakar padhna chahiye….par aaj mood nahi
hai…aaj khud ko rest deta hoon. Ek kaam karta hoon…thodi der so jata
hoon…dimag ko thoda aaram milega toh thoda thik rahega…”
Ye sochkar main bistar par 6 feet ki doori se thik waise hee kooda jaise ek baar aur
kooda tha aur sone ki taiyari karne laga. maine apni aankhe band ki aur universe
ke baare me kalpanye karne laga ki bahut sare planet , asteroids mere aas-paas
ghoom rahe hai…maine apni galaxy cross ki aur phhir waha side me jo choot ke
shape ki dusari galaxy thi usme ghusne ka socha aur main abhi us choot ke shape
wali galaxy me ghus hee raha tha ki wo galaxy behanchod hilne lagi, Sali attitude
dikha rahi thi mujhe….us galaxy se waisi aawaz aayi jaise kisi chiz ko thokne se
aati hai….
“arey jhat…koyi room ka darwaja khatkhata raha hai”
“ye le…itni mushqil se sone ka plan bana tha aur isne sab kuch kharab kar
diya…par wait kahi koyi chor hua toh…apni gun peechhe chhipa leta hoon aur
kuch gadbad hui toh thaaayyye se goli maar dunga ”bistar se uthkar maine kaha
Maine gun apne kamar me khosi aur dheere-dheere flat ka main gate khola, acha
hua..is baar confuse nahi hua….
“arey lawda ye toh ending wala hai…”
Main turant waha se peechhe muda aur main gate khola…Saamne Vandana Rathi
khadi thi.uske chehre par is samay chudayi wala koyi expression nahi tha… wo
ekdum shant khadi thi…pata nahi, wo yaha kyun aayi thi, par use dekhte hee meri
nazar uske tann seene par padi….
“doodh…chay piyega ?”apne mann me main cheekha

193
“Arman… tumne dekha ya nahi par humne, tumhe apology letter bheja tha aur
tumse dobara Sharda Enterprises join karne ke liye request bhi ki thi, lekin tumne
koyi jawab nahi diya….main toh yaha tak tumhare flat A-3 me bhi gayi thi par
mujhe tumhare dost ne bataya ki tum ye shahar chhod kar ja chuke ho aur phhir
aaj maine tumhe yaha dekha….”
Chapter-20: Time loop
“you’re late, mam.ab toh main time wala dialogue maar chuka hoon…isliye ab
main dobara Sharada Enterprises toh join nahi kar sakta”
“humne tumhe 10 din pahle email kiya tha…”
“dekha nahi…waise bhi kya fark padta hai… main in sab kaamo ke layak nahi
hoon.aapne achchha hua jo mujhe nikal diya….idhar aapne mujhe nikala, udhar
usi din mera meri girlfriend Nisha ke sath breakup hua... jo ki thik hua.All Credit
goes to you and 2.0”
“tum layak nahi the….? Tumhare baad jo design engineer aaya tha, wo bahut hee
kharab tha…uski designing me bahut jyada errors aa rahi thi.isliye humne use
change kiya…par dusara jo aaya uski designing toh perfect hai lekin ek file ko
complete karne me use teen din lag rahe hai…jabki tumne teen file ek din me
complete kar di thi….isiliye mere senior ne mujhse kaha ki main tumhe apology
letter bheju aur tumhe wapas bulau…..”
“toh aap ye kahna chahti hai ki Sharda Enterprises ko meri zaroorat hai…”
“haan…”
“toh aap ye kahna chahti hai ki Sharda Enterprises me mujhse achchha design
engineer koyi nahi hai…”
“haan…”
“toh iska matlab aap ye kahna chahti hai ki main sabse mahan hoon ”
“haan….nahi…ye mahan kaha se aa gaya”
“just fishing in troubled waters…main toh bas benefit le raha tha…aapko soch ke
batata hoon…”

194
“kab tak me…”
“aaj sham tak me…ya phhir kal sham tak me ya phhir parso sham tak me”
“thik hai phhir…bye…”peechhe mudkar waha se jaate hue Rathi boli…nahi,

actually pahle boli, phhir peechhe mudi aur phhir gayi…literally
“BC…randi.lund khada karke chali gayi…”

.
Without sex life is just like Marvel without Iron Man or DC without
Batman(Christopher Nolan wala…other sucks ) aur isi liye Vandana Rathi ne jo
mera lund khada kiya toh use wapas baithane ke liye main Ganga-Jamuna aa
gaya….par pahle main Daddu ke paas pahucha…waise bhi lawda phone kar-karke
dimag khaye ja raha tha ki ‘deal pakki hai na’.actually wo dimag kam kha raha
tha, dhamki jyada de raha tha ki yadi maine use dhokha diya toh meri aisi taisi
kar dega… anyway, wo aaj bhi apne jhat jaise cabin me baithkar kisi se phone me
baat kar raha tha.mujhe aata Dekh wo muskuraya aur mujhe baithne ka ishara
kiya….
“us madarchod ko bol ki apni aukat me rahe warna main uske pure khandan ki
aurato ko ganga-jamuna me randi bana kar unse dhandha karwaunga….”
Itna bolkar Daddu thodi der ke liye chup hua aur phhir phone par cheekhte hue
bola…
“Vidhayak hoga ,wo apne ghar ka… usko bolna ki Daddu ke paas aaj bhi wo randi
hai jiske sath wo dus saal pahle maje kiye karta tha…ek minute lagega mujhe uski
party ki maa chodne me…bhaidchod….mujhe Ajmeri bai ke kothe ki sari randiya
wapas chahiye aur sath me uska name bhi jisne police ko ye bataya ki Ajmeri bai
ke kothe me maine katta chhupa rakha hai….use aur uske pure pariwar ko nanga
karke beech chaurahe me goli nahi mari toh mera name bhi Daddu nahi…Ganga-
jamuna meri jaagir hai. main jab chahu, jaise chahu, jo chahu wo main
karunga…koyi gunda yaha apna laad nahi hilayega aur yadi hilaya toh main uska
lund kaatkar uske maa-bahan ke gand me dal dunga aur tu mera jaldi se ye kaam
kar warna main teri bhi maa chodunga, samjha”bolkar Daddu shant hua aur
dusari oor jo aadmi tha, uski baat sunne laga
“haan..ye ki na mardo wali baat…15 minute ke andar mujhe meri randiya mere
kothe par wapas chahiye…ab phone rakh”
phone rakhkar daddu thodi der ke liye shant hokar idhar-udhar dekhta raha aur
phhir mujhse mukhatib hokar bola….

195
“sala dhandha karna mushqil kar diya hai,in policewalo ne…. jab se ye Bairangi ka
naya paltu kutta S.P. aaya hai na, gand me baans kiye baitha hai.”
“life is like physics Daddu bhai…”apne jeb se mobile nikalte hue maine kaha
“kya…..kya.kya…….kya”
“fucking illiterate”apne mobile ka lock kholkar whatsapp par messege check karte
hue main bola“dusare tareeke se samjhata hoon…life me un logo ko bilkul bhi
allow mat karo, jinka role jyada important nahi hai”
“kahna kya chahta hai tu…”
“no problem.teesare tareeke se samjhata hoon…. Mujhe maloom hai ki wo kaun

hai…jisne police ko ye khabar di ki Ajmeri bai ke khoobsurat kothe me jo ki ganga-
jamuna ki aan-baan aur shaan hai…waha aapne gun smuggling ka maal rakha
hua hai…”
“tujhe kaise pata ki Ganga-Jamuna me police ki raid padi hai…wo bhi Ajmeri ke
kothe me”
“jaisa ki maine pahle bhi kaha hai ki na toh aap chutiya ho aur na hee main… main
jiske liye yaha deal kar raha hoon…wo bahut bada aadmi hai, he is the biggest, the
greatest and the deepest… use sab pata rahta hai, phhir chahe wo yaha ho ya na ho
aur rahi baat yaha raid padne ki toh main hamesha Itwari ke red light area se ek
kilometer pahle utarta hoon aur sabse pahle jayja leta hoon ki yaha kya ho raha
hai…phhir idhar entry marta hoon. Wo kya hai na ki ek hoshiyar aadmi kabhi
jyada hoshiyari nahi chodta…aaj bhi waisa hua, maine ek kilometer pahle land
kiya, logo se baat-chit ki aur sari baat pata chal gayi… lakho ki deal main aise hee
nahi karta… any doubt”
“tu, bol raha tha ki tujhe pata hai kisne Ajmeri ke kothe me chhipaye katte ki
jaankari police ko di…”
“haan… Ajmeri ke kothe me chhip…”
“Ajmeri nahi…Ajmeri bai bol use… use sirf Ajmeri wahi bol sakte hai, jo use chodte
hai…tu respect de Ajmeri ko”

196
“ok..mujhe pata hai ki Ajmeri bai ke kothe me aapke gun-smuggling ki information

kisne police ko di…”
“kaun hai wo madarchod…main abhi uski maa-bahan ko randi bana dunga…”
“wo toh aap already bana chuke ho…”
“kya matlab tera…”
“zara socho…Ajmeri bai ke kothe me apne guns rakhi…ye kise maloom ho sakti hai.
aapko , Ajmeri bai ko, aapke un aadmiyo ko jinhone waha guns rakhi aur…”
“aur…”
“aur waha ki randiyo ko….”
mere itna bolte hee Daddu apni jagah par khada hua aur hadak kar mujhse bola
“wo Ajmeri bai ke kothe me saalo se kaam kar rahi hai, wo aisa kyun
karengi…jabki unke ghar ka chulha wahi se jalta hai…wo sab apne marji se waha
aayi hai”
“sab ki sab ?”
“tujhe kahna kya hai…”
“ jaha tak mera dhyan jata hai, uske anusar…last time jab main yaha aaya tha tab
ek aadmi aapse bheekh mang raha tha ki wo apni behan ko Ajmeri bai ke kothe me
nahi bhejega, phhir aapne jabardasti ki thi shayad…..kuch samajh me aaya….”
“salaaa….. ye toh maine socha hee nahi….aaj hee main us randi ko aur uske bhai
ko jaan se maar dunga….par pahle main confirm karunga…”
“trust me, I have seen the future…par main yaha is kaam se nahi aaya tha…”apna
bag kholkar maine kaha aur pura bag Daddu ki table par khali karke kaha “mujhe
ye jewellery black me bechna hai…achchhe daam me. ”
Daddu ne mujhse ek bhi sawal nahi kiya aur apne aadmiyo ko bhejkar ek aadmi ko
bulane ke liye bheja….jo shayad koyi sunar tha aur main aisa kah sakta hoon
kyunki wo waha baithkar mere dwara laye gaye sone ki jaanch-parakh kafi bariki
se kar raha tha, upar se uske kapde aur uske sar me ek topi… uske hath me kayi
rang-birangi angoothiya thi aur gale me latakti sone ki ek chain se bada ajeebo-
garib locket latak raha tha matlab usne apne aapko , apne dhandhe ko full tantra-
mantra se baandh rakha tha lekin phhir bhi mere katte se nikli ek goli uske sare
tanta-mantra ki dhajjiya uda sakte the aur isiliye mujhe guns pasand hai…bas
saamne wale par nishana sadh kar thaayyye se goli maar do, saamne wala turant
197
thanda pad jata hai… us samay ek pal ko maine aisa karne ka socha bhi, darasal
mera mann bahut utsuk ho raha tha, ye janne ke liye ki jab main is sunar ke sar
par goli marunga toh ye zinda rahega ya mar jayega… yadi zinda raha toh kab tak
zinda rahega aur yadi mar gaya toh kitni der me marega… lekin phhir Daddu
mujhe zinda nahi chhodega, isliye waha baithe-baithe, jab sunar mere jewellery ki
naap-taul kar raha tha toh ek pal ko mere dimag me ye bhi khayal aaya ki kyun na
pahle main Daddu ko hee maar du…?
“3 lakh…”sunar ne mere puri jewellery ka rate bataya, jise sunkar hee main
samajh gaya ki wo dono mujhe chuna laga rahe hai…. lekin phhir bhi maine kuch
nahi kaha kyunki ek hoshiyar aadmi har jagah apni hoshiyari nahi chodta aur
jaha khatra ho waha toh bilkul bhi nahi…
“done…par mujhe ye abhi chahiye.darasal ye maal mera nahi hai,ye kisi dusare ka
hai…”
“Daddu ji, aapka commission….”
“ab Arman ji se commission lunga kya….inhe 3 lakh do ,mera commission is baar

tumhare account se katega…”
Maine apna paisa apne bag me dala aur Daddu se vida lekar Madhulika ke ghar ki
taraf chal pada….
Daddu ke guns police ne jabt kar liye the, yani ki Daddu ko ab mera assignment
complete karne me aur bhi waqt lagne wala tha kyunki Daddu is khel ka bahut
chhota khiladi tha warna sau katte toh wo mujhe chand dino me de deta, baki uski
smuggling ka jariya kya hai, iske baare me mujhe jyada jaankari nahi thi…
main Madhulika ke ghar pahuch pata us-se pahle hee Daddu ka ek aadmi kutto ki
tarah bhagte hue mere paas aaya…nahi kutto ki tarah nahi, kutta toh phhir bhi
achchha bhagta hai…wo toh gadho ki tarah apni gand utha ke bhagte hue mere
paas aaya aur mere saamne apna break markar hafne laga…
“bolega be, ya bas hafte rahega….”
“Daddu ne bulaya hai…”
“kyun…”
“pata nahi….”
“sach me nahi pata ya mujhe batana nahi chahta…par kar bhi kya sakte hai, chal”
Main wapas muda aur Daddu ke adde par pahucha.Sunar apna kaam karke waha
se ja chuka tha aur ab waha ek ladki thi jiski umra mushqil se 20-21 saal rahi
hogi…jiske baal pakad kar Daddu use ghaseet raha tha…..
“tujhe pata hai, ye kaun hai…”us 20-21 saal ki ladki ko zameen par dhakka dekar
Daddu ne mujhse puchha
“yeeee…ye ek randi hai…nahi, I shold give her some respect… ye ek veshya hai”

198
“tune sahi kaha… ye ek randi hai”kaskar ek laat us ladki ke peeth me markar

Daddu bola aur wo ladki paglo ki tarah chillane lagi…shayad use Daddu ke ek laat
me hee ye bhanak lag gayi thi ki uske sath ab aage kya hone wala hai…main chup
hee raha
“tujhe kaise pata chala ki ye ek randi hai..”
“main ladkiyo ki shakl dekh ke hee pahchan jata hoon ki kaun randi hai..god gift”
“tumne sahi kaha tha, isi rakhail ne Ajmeri bai ke kothe ki jaankari police ko
di….aaj main achchhe se iski gand marunga…”bolte hue Daddu ne us ladki ko
uthaya aur wapas zameen me patak diya…jis-se ek pal ke liye toh
meri……….zameen me us ladki ko patakne ke baad Daddu ne uski chhati ke upar
apna pair rakha aur apni puri taqat se us ladki ko dabane laga…
“toh main jaun…”
“nahi…tum yaha jo hone wala hai uska maza lo… main chahta hoon meri ye
bahaduri koyi dekhe.. koyi iska sakshi ho , kya bolte hai ise angrezi me…”
“eyewitness”
“haan…wahi… tu yahi rook aur dekh aaj Daddu ki dadagiri… tujhe maza aayega”
“maza…? phhir main waha aaram se baith jata hoon…”ek chair ki taraf ishara
karte hue maine Daddu se kaha
“thik hai…”
Main Daddu ke cabin se ek chair utha kar bahar laya aur uspar baithkar bola “toh
show shuru karo…”
Aur waha uske baad jo hua, wo main chup-chap dekhta raha….Daddu aur uske
aadmiyo ne pahle us ladki ke kapde fade aur phhir sab ek sath uspar toot pade…wo
ladki dard se itni cheekh rahi thi ki laga mere kaan se khoon nikal aayega.wo use
maar bhi rahe the aur chod bhi rahe the….Daddu us ladki ko beech-beech me itne
jam se marta ki mujhe lagta ki bas kayi kaam se, ye ladki…lekin wo ladki itni jaldi
nahi gayi.Daddu aur uske do-char chuninda sathiyo ne us ladki ko buri tarah se
mara…koyi us 20-21 saal ki ladki ko hath se maar raha tha toh koyi pair se… kisi
ke hath me lath tha toh kisi ke hath me belt aur Wo sab us ladki ko non-stop
cheedte-fadte ja rahe the…uska pura sharir thodi hee der me khoon se dhak gaya
tha… iske baad Daddu neeche jhuka aur us ladki ka sar pakad kar zameen me
patakne laga…main toh ye soch ke kanp raha tha ki iska sharir abhi tak zinda
kaise hai….wo itni asahya ho gayi thi ki jab sabne apni bhadash nikal li toh us-se
hila bhi nahi ja raha tha….wo jaha thi wahi nagn awastha me bahut der tak padi
rahi….phhir Daddu ne apna belt nikala aur us ladki ko belt se peetne laga aur tab
tak marta raha jab tak ki uska sharir thanda nahi pad gaya aur main wahi kursi
me baithkar ye sab dekhta raha. Par ajeeb baat ye thi ki mujhe bilkul bhi us ladki
ke liye bura nahi lag raha tha, main jaha baitha tha…wahi baith kar sab kuch
chup-chap dekhta raha…ant tak dekhta raha.
199
“bhai, lagta hai ye tapak gayi…”
“tapak gayi…nale me fek do ise aur iske bhai ke pure khandan ko utha lao…sabka
yahi haal hoga….sabko…sabko…is randi ke sare khandan ko nanga karke
marunga… pahle toh iske baap ke gand me iske bhai ka lund dalwaunga aur phhir
iski maa ke bhosde me iske bhai ka…phhir iske bhabhi aur maa ka nanga naach
hoga yaha sabke samne..itna hee nahi is mari hui randi ko bhi iske baap-bhai se
chudwaunga…. Rooh kaanp jayegi is madarchod ki aur pura Ganga-jamuna yaad
rakhega ki Daddu ke khilaf jaane ka kya hashra hota hai…jaa jakar iske pure
gharwalo ko utha la, madarchodo ne Daddu ko Mazak bana rakha hai….”
mere mann me aksar ye khayal aata hai ki yadi prakriti koyi devi hoti aur main
unse kabhi milta toh….ye sawal zaroor puchhta ki unki nazar me dinosaurs jyada
achchhe the ya phhir insaan...i just hate everyone, including myself….
Main waha se utha aur zameen me lahuluhan padi us ladki ke paas gaya…
“kya umra hogi iski…? 20 ya phhir 21 aur teri vazah se ye mar gayi… kitna bura
hai tu…Kya zaroorat thi tujhe iska name batane ki, tu apne talent ka…apne tez
dimag ka galat istemaal kar raha hai par yaad rakhna tujhe in sabka hisab dena
padega… keemat toh chukani padegi tujhe…jaise maine chukaya tha, college
me….tab main dua karunga ki tera haal aisa na ho”
“chup be, 1.0 ke jaisi baate mat kar…warna tujhe bhi uninstall kar dunga…”
“you’re a bad person…very…very…very….bad person. Why ?”
“ I became a bad person because being good is too boring and I hate boring
things…”
Main neeche jhuka aur zameen me lahuluhan padi ladki ke paas baithkar uski
saanse check ki…wo abhi bhi zinda thi shayad, par uske sharir me koyi harqat nahi
thi…. uske kaan ke paas apna muh lejakar maine us-se kaha… “mard ban…die with
smile, not with tears…”
Aur waha se bahar aa gaya, kyunki mujhe maloom tha ki aage ab waha kya hone
wala tha aur mera pet sirf ek se hee bhar gaya tha……
“die with smile, not with tears…” ye maine us marti hui ladki se kaha tha, lekin
kyun…? Kya zaroorat thi mujhe ye kahne ki…kaun sa wo meri baat maankar
muskurate hue mar rahi hogi… Madhulika ke ghar ki taraf badhte hue maine is
baare me socha…bahut socha…pel ke socha…tab mujhe samajh aaya ki….dialogue
tha, so maar diya.
Madhulika ke ghar ki taraf badhte hue mere dimag me jo dusari baat aayi wo ye ki
kya abhi jo hua uska reason main hoon ? kya meri vazah se us ladki ki wo halaat
hui ? kya kabhi bhagwan mujhe maaf karega ? par bhagwan toh hai hee nahi aur
yadi hai bhi toh wo ye sab dekh nahi raha….

200
“congrats , ab tere dimag me ek aur character ghusne wala hai….wo ladki toh
bhoot banker teri band baja degi….tu kitna bura hai be”
“I had two choices… to be a good man or a bad but then I chose to be Great.so here
is The Great AR-Man….Arrogant Reputed MAN aur us ladki ke baare me Daddu ko
toh waise bhi pata chalne wala tha…Daddu kanche khelkar itna bada nahi bana
hai….”
“phhir toh tera bhi ant aisa hee hoga….”
“waise bhi zinda kaun rahna chahta hai, yaha aur jis tarah Daddu kanche khelkar
bada nahi hua hai waise main bhi kanche khelkar bada nahi hua hoon… jis din
Daddu aur mera aamna-samna hoga us din ya toh Daddu marega ya main aur
dono hee case me insaniyat ka bhala hoga…chal papa bol”
“abey ,Madhulika ka ghar peechhe chhoot gaya….”
“hata ,aaj chodne ka mood nahi hai…”
“room le chal…”
“pagal hai kya…wo mere room kyun aayegi”
“uska baap paiso ka lalchi hai aur tere bag me teen lakh rupaye hai….itne me toh
wo taklu bhi tere sath aane ke liye taiyar ho jaye….phhir Madhulika ko toh wo bhej
hee dega.”
“reverse..….”
.
Maine khud ko reverse mara aur saamne se Madhulika ke ghar me ghusa…

Madhulika ka baap is samay chair me baithkar apna lund pant ke bahar se khujate
hue ghar ki deewar ki taraf dekh raha tha…
“kyun be, dalle…”andar jate hee maine Madhulika ke baap ko dhikkara par wo
mujhe dekhkar khus ho gaya….
“arey aap… aapki vazah se main ghar ki deewaro ko thik karwane ka soch raha
tha….”
“Madhulika kaha….”
“wo maine apne ek dost se kuch saal pahle kuch paise udhar liye the…par gareebi
ki vazah se chuka nahi paya…isliye Madhulika wo chuka rahi hai….”
“kitna neech hai be tu….maine tujhse jyada gira hua insaan aaj tak nahi
dekha…”wahi uske bahar wale room me rakhi ek tooti hui kursi par sawdhani se
baithkar maine kaha
“kabhi aaina nahi dekha kya bhau…”
“kya matlab hai be tera….bosdiwale”

201
“yadi main kasai, toh Madhulika bakri aur aap mere kharid-dar….galti sirf meri
nahi hai, aapki bhi hai…par hum ye baat kyun kar rahe hai, aap baitho main
aapke liye kuch khane-peene ka prabandh karta hoon…”
“ek randi ke yaha ka khana…yuck…mujhe aisi feeling aa rahi hai jaise kitno ne us
khane me apna mutth milaya hoga…rahne de”katta hath me ghumte hue maine
kaha “achchha ye bata, Madhulika ek raat ke liye kitne rupaye me mil sakti hai…”
“2000 me puri raat…”bina samay gawaye tapak se Madhulika ka baap bola “aap
rukne wale ho kya….?”
“main aur yaha…never. Main Madhulika ko ek raat apne sath le jaane ki baat kar
raha hoon…”
“ee ka kahat ho aap…ye nahi ho sakat bhau.Madhu kabhi kahi nahi gayi…”
“5000…”
“arey bhau, kahe sharminda karat ho….aap samajh kahe nahi rahe ho”
“10000 me , soch le…”
“aur iski kya guarantee hai ki Madhu ko kuch nahi hoga….”
“ye le mera number, call karte rahna aur bosdike Daddu mujhe achchhi tarah
jaanta hai, isliye main Madhulika ko lekar kahi nahi bhagunga”
“thik hai, par Daddu ko ye mat batana bhau ki aap mujhe dus hazar de rahe
ho…warna do hazar toh wo hee kha jayega…thik hai bhau”
Maine apna bag rotate karke saamne kiya aur ekdum role se chashma lagakar bag
ka chain khol kar tees hazar uske taraf aise feke jaise na jaane main kitna bada
rahis hoon….
“ye le 30 hazar aur teen din ke liye Madhulika mere sath rahegi aur ab bosdiwale
tune koyi aana-kani ki toh Daddu ko bolkar tere muh me mutth marwa
dunga….tujhe pata nahi par abhi thodi der pahle hee Daddu ne mere kahne me ek
raand ko chudwa-chudwa kar jaan se maar diya aur yadi meri khisak gayi toh tere
sath bhi wahi hoga…Madhulika ko bol…naha dhokar bahar aaye, main bahar
khada hoon….yaha andar mujhe dalalo wali feeling aa rahi hai…”
Mujhe yaad hai ki main yaha Ganga-Jamuna me pahli baar jis auto me aaya tha us
autowale ne mujhse kaha tha ki Ganga-Jamuna ki ladkiya chahe jitni marji kapde
pahan le…logo ko wo nangi hee nazar aati hai aur wo sach tha…. Madhulika mere
bagal me saree pahan kar baithi hui thi lekin mujhe aisa lag raha tha…jaise ki wo
ab bhi nangi hee ho….
Par mujhe ye bilkul bhi achchha nahi lag raha tha, kisi bhi angle se nahi…kahi se
bhi nahi ki…main ek veshya ko apne sath le jar aha tha. mujhe ye ho kya gaya
hai…? meri vaah se abhi ek ladki ki jaan gayi aur ab main ek veshya ko teen din ke
liye apne ghar lekar jaa raha hoon…kya mera dimag ghaas charne gaya hai…kya
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kahenge mere dost jab unhe meri in kartoot ke baare me pata chalega toh… Mana
ki Madhulika bahut hot hai…bahut sexy hai. lekin phhir bhi use apne sath le jaana
ye kaha ka nyay hai….kya mujhe Madhulika se pyar ho gaya hai ? No…Never…ye
nahi ho sakta…main aur ek randi se se pyar…. Main jab Nisha se pyar nahi kar
paya toh phhir kisi aur se kya karunga….phhir main is auto me iske sath kya kar
raha hoon… mujhe ya toh ise neeche fek dena chahiye ya phhir khud kood jaana
chahiye. Maine ek randi ke liye tees hazar kharch kar diye… tees hazar… seriously
tees hazar… itni toh sharda enterprises me meri salary nahi thi .
“aap kaha rahte ho…”itni der se auto me jo khamoshi thi use todte hue Madhulika
boli aur badle me main andar hee andar khisiya kar rah gaya….mujhe ab bhi
yakin nahi ho raha tha ki main Madhulika ko apne sath le jaa raha tha….
“ye sapna hai behanchod…pakka sapna hai behanchod, ye haqiqat nahi hai
behanchod, ye haqiqat ho hee nahi sakti behanchod…main is waqt apne flat me
hoon behanchod….”sochte hue maine apna purana formula apnaya aur auto me ek
mukka mara….
“haqiqat hai……… behanchod…”apna hath dusare hath se malte hue maine kaha
“itni jor se marne ki kya zaroorat thi…”
“main samajh sakti hoon…mere sath koyi nahi rahna chahta.maine toh pahle hee
warn kiya tha ki mere paas mat aaya karo…”auto me meri harqate dekh
Madhulika boli “aap chaho toh mujhe yahi utar do…main wapas chali jaungi…”
“haan, ye sahi rahega…nahi..ye sahi nahi rahega…maine 30 hazar tujhe chhodne

ke liye nahi balki tujhe chodne ke liye diye hai aur tu chup rah…mujhe tujhse
advice lene ki zaroorat nahi hai..”
“thik hai…”muskurate hue Madhulika boli aur ye shayad pahli baar tha jab main
use muskurate hue dekh raha tha par main bilkul bhi nahi chahta tha ki main uski
taraf dekhu…kyunki use muskurata hua dekh main normal hone laga tha…par
main aisa nahi chahta tha. main use bhar-bhar ke gaali dena chahta tha…main use
randi…veshya…chhinar aur bhi bahut kuch kahna chahta tha.lekin uski ek
muskurahat ne mere muh par mano tala laga diya tha. main use kuch bol hee nahi
paya….
“phhir se wo wala stunt kar toh…”maine kaha
“kya…”
“arey wahi stunt jo tune abhi thodi der pahle kiya…phhir se kar toh”
Aur wo shant hee rahi…jispar mujhe meri galti ka ahsaas hua aur maine apne
sabdo ko badal kar kaha…
“mera matlab ,phhir se muskura toh…mujhe wo achchha laga…”
“kya…main kuch samjhi nahi…”muskurate hue Madhulika boli…

203
“wow…amazing…you look beautiful. Tumhe pata hai main bhi pahle aisich…aisich
natural smile diya karta tha, meri muskan ekdum kadak, real aur natural hua
karti thi.par ab main sirf acting karta hoon….maine khud se itna jhooth bola hai ki
ab main khud hee nahi samajh pata ki kya haqiqat hai aur kya mera jhooth..
mujhe lagta hai ki meri hasi, meri muskan, mera gussa ye sab ek chhalawa hai,jo
sach ko mujhse chhipa rahe ho…. tum yakin nahi karogi par main khud se jhooth
bol sakta hoon par kamal ki baat toh ye hai ki main uspar yakin bhi kar leta hoon,
jisme meri acting mera bharpoor sath deti hai….”
“acting… yani ki abhinay na…ek baar muskura kar dikhao toh…”
“yaha…? ”
“haan…”
“abhi…isi waqt…?”
“kyun nahi…”
“thik hai phhir…”maine apna chehra dusari taraf kiya aur do-teen lambi-lambi
saans lekar apne daant dikhate hue Madhulika ki taraf muda aur Madhulika ne
mujhe dekh kar jo hasna shuru kiya toh wo bahut der tak hasti rahi….
.
“kya be 3.0, ek veshya tujhpar has rahi hai…tujhpar hasne ka haq sirf Esha ko
hai…baaki kisi ko nahi…”
“iski toh…”
Maine apna muh turant band kiya aur turant apne face ka expression change
karke Madhulika ko gusse se dekha…par wo ab mujhe dekhkar aur bhi jor-jor se
hasne lagi….
“tu bhai, sanyas le le…tujhse kuch na hoga. Kyun meri kamayi hui izzat me mutth
mar raha hai… just kill her…”
“yaha…pagal hai kya…khoon-voon room me, tension kyun leta hai…teen din ab ye
mere sath hee rahegi…”
“version 2.0 activate karu kya…”
“abhi nahi…uski kamar dekh kitni gori hai…lagta hai chat loon…”
“go on…”
Maine hasti hui Madhulika ke kamar me apna hath rakha aur uski chamdi ko
masalne laga, jis-se Madhulika apni hasi rok-kar auto walo ko dekhti hui meri
taraf khisak aayi…

204
“tu mujhe last time kah rahi thi ki main tujhse door rahu warna main barbaad ho
jaunga….aaj wahi baat main tujhe kahta hoon ki tu mujhse door rah, warna main
tera khoon kar dunga. Tune kabhi kisi pagal kutte ko dekha hai….? use koyi fark
nahi padta ki saamne wala kaun hai, uski aukat kya hai…uske saamne jo bhi aata
hai,wo use kaat leta hai…main bhi usi pagal kutte ki tarah hoon jo har kisi ko kat
khata hai.so be scared…”
.
Main Madhulika ko lekar E-6 me pahucha aur khane ka order dene ke liye apna
mobile uthaya….lekin mere mobile me balance hee nahi tha…maine socha ki net
banking ke through recharge kar leta hoon, lekin BC mera netpack bhi kal hee
expire ho chuka tha….yani ki mujhe…mujhe swayam Yugpurush Shri Arman ko
recharge karne ke liye jaana pad raha tha…shuru me mujhe khayal aaya ki
Madhulika ko bhej doon…lekin phhir socha ki kahi kuch ho na jaaye is dar se
maine khud hee jaane ka socha...
“sahi hai, udhar se MBD se khana bhi pack karwa lunga…kitne din pizza kha-kha
kar guzara karunga…kahi aisa na ho ki pizza kha-kha kar main bhi pizza ke mafiq
gol-matol ho jaun…”
Maine apne bag me rakhe 3 lakh rupaye me se ek gaddi nikali aur mobile recharge
wale dukan me pahucha…waha apna mobile recharge karane ke baad main MBD
pahucha aur mujhe jo-jo khana tha usko pack karne ka order de diya….
“10 minute sir…aap tab tak waha baithiye…kya lenge aap tea ya coffee…”
“daru…”
“sorry sir…yaha drinking aur smoking allow nahi hai…”
“ek kaam karna…”menu dekhte hue maine kaha “aalu ke parathe 12 se 15 kar de….
Nahi 15 toh main hee kha jaunga… 20 kar de…twenty final. Kitna bill hua…”
“ twenty parathas, one full paneer…aapke hue total 865 /-”
Maine use 500 ki do patti di aur baki bache paise use aise hee de diye… bahut bada
dil hai mera ………..aur lund bhi….
“thank you sir…”
“tum order ready karo…main do-teen peg markar aata hoon”
“ok sir….”
Do-teen peg markar aur khana pack karwa ke main flat me wapas
aaya…Madhulika mere flat ka kona-kona jhak rahi thi aur mere andar aate hee
meri taraf khushi se aayi…
“aapka ghar bahut achchha hai…aap bahut ameer ho.aap kaam kya karte ho…”

205
“Pirates of NH-6, company ka name suna hai…”saman table par rakhkar maine
kaha aur apne dono shoes utarkar dustbin me feka… “yessss, goal…”
“aapne joote kude-dan me kyun fek diye…”thoda shocked hokar Madhulika

puchhi…
“kafi der se mera mann kar raha tha ki main koyi chiz dustbin me feku…so…um-
hmm…by the way, kaha tha main..”apne shocks utar ka lighter se jalate hue maine
puchha
“aap apne baare me bata rahe the ki koyi company…”mere jalte hue shocks ko
dekhkar Madhulika boli… wo is samay thodi-thodi dar rahi thi ki ye main kya kar
raha hoon aur exactly, yahi toh main chahta tha…
“pirates of NH-6…main us company ka owner hoon..”
“main khana bana doon…”
“bahut rahis hoon main , bahar hotel se magwa kar roj khana khata hoon aur tu
khana kyun banayegi…ye khana jo main pack kara kar laya hoon, use kya tera
baap khayega ya teri mari hui maa…mari hui maa....lol…”
Jawab me Madhulika chup ho gayi…par use dekhkar main samajh gaya ki wo meri
baat ka bur maan gayi thi, wo bhi shayad mujhe bhar-bhar ke gaali dena chahti thi
ya phhir meri maa ko…lekin usne aisa kuch nahi kiya…usne mujhse ek shabd bhi
nahi kaha aur yadi kuch kahti toh main uske gand me ek bade sa danda daalkar us
dande me jor se laat maar deta…literally… khair wo chup-chap apna daant
peeskar rah gayi….
Mere dwara uski mari hui maa ke bare me bolne ke baad kafi der tak hum dono
aise hee chup-chap ek dusare ko dekhte hue khade rahe aur us dauran daru ne
apna full asar dikhana chalu kiya, mera sharir apne aap hilne-dulne laga
tha…maine ek angdayi li aur
“main chhat me jaa raha hoon aur khabardar jo mere peechhe aayi toh, warna
wahi se neeche fek dunga…”
.
Ladkhadate hue main apne flat se bahar aaya aur chhat par jaane ke liye seedhiyo
par chadhne laga..waise toh mujhe daru chadhti hai,lekin itni nahi ki main khud
par control na rakh saku…par is waqt main seedhiya chadhte hue itna ladkhada
raha tha ki ek pal ko mujhe aisa laga mano main seedhiyo se fisalkar neeche hee
gir jaunga…mera sar bahut ghoom raha tha aur pair seedhiyo par upar chadhte
hue buri tarah dagmaga rahe the…ye toh phhir bhi normal tha…. lekin upar chhat
par jaate hue ek waqt aisa aaya jab mere pair itne bekabu ho gaye ki khud ko girne
se bachane ke liye mujhe railings ka sahara lena pada… maine railings ko dono
hatho se pakda aur aankh band karke ahiste-ahiste wahi seedhiyo par baithne ki
koshish karne laga…ab mera sar aur bhi jyada ghoomne laga tha aur jab main
railings ke sahare neeche baith raha tha tabhi eka-ek mere hath railing se chhoot
gaye aur mere pairo ne mera sath chhod diya… us pal mujhe buri tarike se neeche
girne ka ahsaas ho chuka tha, maine toh ye bhi soch liya tha ki kaha-kaha mujhe
chot lagne wali hai aur kitne din main bed par pada rahunga…lekin tabhi… tabhi
206
achanak se kisi ne mujhe pakad liya aur uske sparsh matra se main samajh gaya ki
wo kaun thi…
“thank you, Aradhna….achchha hua jo tune mujhe pakad liya, warna aaj main bhi
tere paas pahuch jata…”
“sir, mujhe ye bilkul bhi nahi pasand ki aap us veshya ko yaha lao…”mujhe pakad
kar wahi seedhiyo par baithate hue Aradhna boli aur khud bhi mere bagal me
baith gayi..
“wo toh mujhe bhi nahi pasand…de tali”Aradhna ki taraf dekhkar maine kaha…
Waise toh waha is waqt bahut andhera tha, lekin main Aradhna ko saaf-saaf dekh
sakta tha. uska pura sharir shwet prakash ki tarah chamak raha tha…Aradhna
meri taraf apna chehra karke baithi hui mujhe bade pyar se nihar rahi thi aur
main…main uske bade-bade doodh saaf dekh sakta tha aur nashe ki halat me
ladkhadate mere mann ne mujhe huqm diya ki main uske doodh daba du….par
maine aisa nahi kiya… kyunki after all wo ek mari hui ladki thi… Respect _/\_ .dil
se na sahi… hath se toh de hee sakta hoon.
“Aradhna…”
“hmm…”
“bina namak ke sabji khayi hai kabhi…”
“haan..ek baar.. kuch feel hee nahi hota..”
“same, mujhe bhi sala kuch feel nahi hota… waise, meri vazah se aaj ek aur ladki
mar gayi.tumhe kya lagta hai…kya main uski maut ka jimmedar hoon…Daddu toh
use waise bhi ek na ek din pakad leta…”
“ye bhi toh ho sakta hai ki yadi aap Daddu ko kuch na batate toh Daddu use kabhi
pakad hee na pata… shayad isi bahane police uski help karti aur wo us narak se
bahar nikal jati… lekin……lekin……aap ki vazah se….. aap itne bure kyun ho,
sir…mera matlab kya zaroorat thi aapko Daddu ko us ladki ke baare batane
ki…aap dusaro ki parvah kyun nahi karte… aapko kya zara bhi andaza hai ki
aapke is bartaav ka dusaro par kya asar hota hai… aapke liye ye kuch seconds ka
maza dusaro ke liye kitna bhayanak saabit hota hai, iska aapko andaza bhi nahi…
aapne kabhi ye nahi socha ki is duniya me aur bhi log hai aur unki bhi zindagi
hai… jis tarah aapka guroor hai, waise hee unka bhi guroor hai… jise bachane ke
liye wo kuch bhi kar sakte hai… wo ladki jo aaj mari, kuch din pahle hasi-khushi
jeevan bita rahi thi, phhir uspar Daddu ki nazar padi aur usne uski zindagi ko ek
pal me chaknachur karke use kothe me bitha diya aur phhir aaj aapki meharbani
ki vazah se Daddu ne use peet-peet kar maar dala…par main bol kise rahi hoon ,
use…jisne kabhi apne baap tak ki izzat nahi ki… par mujhe aaj tak ek baat samajh
nahi aayi ki aap aise kyun ho… mera matlab koyi toh reason hoga ”
“reason… reason actually, main tab bahut chhota tha, jab main ye jaan gaya ki
yaha kisi ko kisi se koyi matlab nahi hai… Aradhna, tumhare school me tumhare
class me koyi padhne me hoshiyar raha hoga,jo class me top marta raha
hoga…kuch aise rahe honge jo sports me avval aate rahe honge…kuch aise bhi rahe
207
honge jo kayi tarah ke compition jeetkar apne school aur maa-baap ka name
roshan karte rahe honge, kuch toh aise bhi rahe honge jinke maa-baap apne bete
ko sirf annual function me anchoring ya perform karta dekh khushi se…garv se
dusaro ko batate rahe honge ki wo dekho…wo mera beta hai, mera matlab…kamal
hai na..ek ladka jo stage me jakar 5 minutes ghisi-piti lines bolta hai…use sunkar
unke maa-baap ka garv se seena chauda ho jata hai….Ye sab ki sab qualities mere
andar thi… maine itne cup jeete ki unhe jhole me bharkar rakhna padta tha,
kyunki mere papa ko laga ki is tarah pure ghar me mere winning cups rakhne par
Vipin bhaiya ko sad feel hoga…. par jo chiz mujhe sabse jyada hurt karti thi ki wo
ye ki mere baap ne kabhi meri peeth nahi thapthapayi… unhe meri kabhi koyi
qualities nahi dikhi wahi yadi Vipin bhaiya kisi bhi competition me yadi
consolation prize bhi jeet jaye toh mere mummi-papa kayi dino tak uske baare me
dusaro se charcha karte rahte the… main bahut kam umra me samajh gaya tha ki
jin logo ke paas meri jitni qualities nahi hoti wo mujhse jalte hai, mujhse nafrat
karte hai… main unki jalan aur nafrat se aisa bana... jinhe main apna kahta tha,
maine un sabki aankho me mere liye chhipi nafrat dekhi… phhir chahe school me,
wo mera dost Varun ho ya phhir ghar me mera bada bhai…yaha tak ki mere maa-
baap bhi. Wo aksar yahi dua karte the ki main jis competition me participate kar
raha hoon usme kabhi na jeetu… infact apne influence ka istemaal karke unhone ek
baar toh school me ho rahe quiz contest me mere kayi right answers ko galat
karwa diya tha aur unhone socha tha ki mujhe ye kabhi nahi pata chalega, par
main itna bewkoof nahi tha… us din main kuch nahi kar paya aur mere baap ki
vazah se kuch chutiye mujhe chutiya bana gaye jiske baad mere bheje me ek baat
ghusi ki yadi is duniya me jeena hai toh khamosh mat baitho, balki duniya ko
khamosh kar do… apne hunar se, apne taqat se kuch aisa karo ki tumse jalne wale
aur jale yaha tak ki tumhe pyar karne wale bhi jalne lage…make everyone cry like
a little bitch…log tumhare name se roye…. Tab se mera sirf ek hee usool hai….dont
be silent, make the world silent… ”
“life is all about our thinking, our beliefs and our daring..it’s you vs you...always it
was and always it will be…. But then I met a guy who was exactly like me…”
“Arun sir…”
“haan… us lawde ko kabhi koyi farak hee nahi pada…uska din mutth marne se
shuru hota aur mutth marne pe khatm ho jata… ajeeb mutth-baz tha sala…chutiya,
gandul… kabhi-kabhi main sochta hoon ki tumhari jagah yadi wo mujhe dikhta toh
kitna maza aata.wo mujhe naye-naye tarike se mutth marne ke tricks batata aur
phhir hum dono bathroom me jakar sperm donate karte…tum bhi mujhse college
me nafrat karti thi, hai na…kaha gayi ye, Sali gayab ho gayi…achchha hua khud
mar gayi,warna jaise iske college me bartaav the…us base pe toh main hee ise
maar deta”
Maine railings ko dono hatho se pakda aur railing par sar tikakar wahi so gaya
lekin phhir aadhi raat ko mujhe Madhulika ne uthaya aur main neend ke aagosh
me dooba hua andar aakar so gaya…. Aradhna ke dikhne ka ek fayda ye tha ki wo
aksar mujhe sula kar jati thi… how sweet…….. lawda
Mujhe pata nahi Madhulika ko dekhkar kya ho gaya tha… wo teen din mere sath
waha rahi par un teen dino me main uske zara bhi kareeb nahi gaya, yaha tak ki
208
use chhua tak nahi…. Pahle din toh wo mere se chudne mere paas bhi aayi thi lekin
maine use waha se bhaga diya…pata nahi kyun, par maine aisa hee kiya…maine
uske rahne ka intezaam dusare room me kar diya tha aur apne room ka gate har
waqt band karke rakhta tha…is tarah main khud ke flat me ek randi ki vazah se
kaid ho gaya tha aur us dauran un teen dino me mujhe aisa lagne laga tha jaise ki
mere flat me total 5 nahi balki 6 darwaje hai… ek extra darwaja mere bedroom me
tha.. bedroom me aane-jaane ke liye do darwaje the. Ek darwaja wo jiska istemaal
main karta hoon aur dusara wo jiska istemaal Aradhna karti hai… Aradhna wala
darwaja mere bed bed ke thik bagal me tha aur pichhale teen dino se wo usi
darwaje ke through mere room me aa-jaa rahi thi… maine bhi us darwaje ka
istemaal karna chaha, kyunki uska istemaal karne par mujhe bahar hall me
mauzood Madhulika ka saamna nahi karna padta… lekin main wo darwaja nahi
khol paya… waha beshak chhatha darwaja tha lekin mujhe wo deewar jaisa hee
mahsoos hota tha…
Maine us sixth door ke baare me Aradhna se bhi baat ki toh usne kaha ki wo ek
spiritual gate hai, waha se sirf wahi log aa-ja sakte hai… jo marne ke baad kisi se
communicate karte hai aur main ek zinda insaan hoon… usne mujhe kaha ki yadi
mujhe us sixth door ka istemaal karna hai toh mujhe khud ko maarna padega,
jisme wo meri madad kar sakti…
“toh wo ek spiritiual door hai…tabhi wo achanak aati hai aur achanak chali jati
hai kahi is ghar me aur bhi bahut sare hidden darwaje toh nahi…? jinke baare me
mujhe pata hee na ho”
“mujhe aaj jaana hai…”mera gate khat-khatate hue Madhulika boli….
“toh jaana…”
“mujhe raasta nahi maloom aur aapne mere pitaji se kaha tha ki aap mujhe wapas
chhodenge…”
“maine aisa kaha tha ? sala kuch bhi promise kar deta hoon…exact do minute tees
second ke baad gate knock karna…na ek second kam aur na hee ek second jyada”
Aur is tarah pure teen din baad main aaj apne room se bahar nikla tha…maine
pahle Madhulika ko waha se bahar sadak par jaane ke liye kaha aur jab wo sadak
par chali gayi toh main taala band karke bahar aaya….
“tu mujhse char kadam peechhe hee rahna…”Madhulika se char kadam aage aakar
maine kaha…
Mere is bartaav ka Madhulika par kya asar ho raha tha mujhe nahi pata aur na
hee maine ispar koyi dhyan diya…mujhe toh bas jaise-taise Madhulika ko yaha se
saltana tha aur maine mann hee mann ye pran le liya tha ki aaj ke baad main uski
shakl kabhi nahi dekhunga, warna main Physics-Putra Arman nahi…
“hey Arman….”kisi ne bahut jor se mera name liya
“Vandana mam, aap…”aawaz ki taraf jab maine palti mari toh mujhe Vandana
Rathi dikhi aur use dekhte hee maine apne jeb se turant goggle nikala aur turant
pahankar bola “ Good morning ,mam ”

209
“hell with your Good Morning… maine tumse 3 din pahle kuch kaha tha aur tumne
kaha tha ki tum sham ko jawab doge… lekin aaj teen din ho gaye… maine kayi baar
tumhe call kiya , kayi baar tumhare gate par knock bhi kiya…lekin tumne koyi
answer hee nahi diya… tum kya last time ka mujhse badla le rahe ho ? yadi Sharda
Enterprises rejoin nahi karna toh mat karo…lekin itna attitude dikhane ki koyi
zaroorat nahi hai…ok”
“ok..”
“tum mujhe abhi batao ki kya tum Sharda Enterprises join kar rahe ho ya nahi”
“aaj sham ko batata hoon…”
“phhir se sham ko…”apna sar peet kar Vandana mam boli....actually boli nahi
balki cheekhi…jiske jawab me maine apna muh thoda se khola aur saamne ke aath
daant(I counted it later) dikhate hue maine kaha “haan ”
“whatever…who’s she”mere peeche mujhse char kadam ki doori par khadi

Madhulika ki taraf ungali dikhakar usne puchha…
“who..? she…? That beautiful girl…? I don’t know”
“she is with you…isn’t she ? ”
“ok bye…”itna bolkar main waha se aage badh gaya.

.
Madhulika ko uske ghar chhodkar maine uske baap ko pakda aur ginkar do laat
use mare…par wo rone ke bajaya, mujhpar gussa hone ke bajay has raha tha…jis-
se mera matha aur sanka aur maine ek mukka kaskar uske takle me diya…
“kya hua saheb, maja nahi aaya kya….”apne takle par hath pherkar wo haste hue
bola
“tu BC mujhe dikhna mat aaj ke baad…sale dalle…”
“dekho saheb, izzat se baat karo… bahut sah liya maine. Wo toh paisa dete ho isliye
bardasht kar raha hoon…warna mujhe pahle din hee pata chal gaya tha ki aap
police me nahi ho. Ganga-Jamuna jis thane me padta hai waha ke policewalo ko
Daddu sirf har mahine isi baat ke lakh rupaye deta hai ki wo yaha na aaye aur
dusari baat policewale Daddu ke katte ka istemaal nahi karte…toh yadi agli baar
kisi ko bolo ki tum police wale ho toh ye hazar rupaye ka katta apni jeb me hee
rakhna…”waha rakhi ek chair me baithte hue Madhulika ka baap bola “toh kaisa
tha mera abhinay…? Amitabh Bachchan ke mafiq solid tha na.. tumhe kya laga ki
main sach me tumse darta hoon… ye humara pushtaini dhanda hai aur tumhe
socha ki tum mujhe chuna laga doge…”
“ tu baki sab toh samajh gaya, your acting was pretty good…no doubt… par tu ye
nahi samjha ki meri kahani me kisi bhi character ka ant smoothly nahi hota… ya
toh main unki leta hoon ya phhir wo meri lete hai. par adhiktar main hee leta hoon
aur waise bhi kya hua jo main police me nahi hoon, Gun toh hai na mere paas aur
goli bhi”
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“mere paas bhi hai…wo bhi do-do…”
“chal be sale, madarchod….dalle…randi ki aulad… teri bahan ka bur-bada like

dahi-bada…”ek jhapad aur use markar maine kaha…
“madartaka tujhe samajh nahi aa raha kya…”mera collar pakad kar wo

cheekha…“chup-chap ja yaha se”
Itne me humari garma-gahmi ke beech Madhulika waha aa gayi aur apne baap ki
peeth sahla kar use shant rahne ke liye bolne lagi….jis-se wo taklu shant hone
laga…
“tu bhi apni beti ko chodta hai kya be…dalle…. Jis tarah se teri ye randi beti teri
peeth sahla rahi hai…us-se toh yahi lagta hai ki customer na milne par tu khud ise
chodta hoga, tu khud iski choot chat-ta hoga aur ise lund chusate hue isi ke muh me
mutth gira deta hoga aur phhir paise bhi nahi deta hoga…hahaha… tujhe pata hai
maine kaise teri beti ki itne din se gand mari hai…wo zameen dekh raha hai wahi
par ghista-ghista kar teri beti ko choda hoon… teri beti lund mast choosti hai… sale
dalle, chutiye…mujhe toh tujhe dekhte hee teri asliyat samajh jaani chahiye
the…waise bhi tu mujhe yaha yahi bolkar laya tha ki ye teri biwi hai… bol tune
apni mari hui biwi ke saamne apni beti ko choda hai ya nahi aur phhir jab tera
nikalne wala tha toh tune apna lund apni marti hui biwi ke chehre ki taraf kar
diya… Sali randi, lund ka swad lete-lete mar gayi…. Hahaha… ab yadi tu ek randi
ki aaulad hai, jo ki tu hai hee toh aa aur mujhse lad… warna ja jakar apni beti ke
choot me ungali kar… waise bhi teen din se use lund nahi mila toh gam me hogi….
Kutiya kahi ki…. Betichod sale… “itna bolkar maine ek jordar saans li aur bola
“nice provoking… I’m too good in this…”
“saheb aap jao…”gusse se ufante apne baap ko pakad kar andar kheechne ki
koshish karte hue Madhulika mujhse boli….
“ghoor kya raha hai be behanchod…”zameen me pada uska chappal uthakar usi ko
fek kar marte hue maine kaha “aukat me rah be dalle, jab main apne baap se kabhi
nahi dara toh phhir tujhse kya darunga aur jyada hoshiyari chodi na toh tujhe aur
teri beti ko bisleri se chudwaunga….wo bhi pure Ganga-Jamuna me sabke
saamne… bhosdike randiyo… pata nahi kis-kis ka lawda chat kar badi hui hai teri
beti aur kis-kis ka lawda lekar teri biwi ne ise paida kiya hai… kya teri maa bhi
randi thi ? khandani dhandha hai ye tumlogo ka…”
Main jaanta tha ki main jo kah raha tha wo bahut jyada katu shabd the , itne katu
ki samne wala samne wale ki jaan le le… Narcissism , jo ki mere according mujhe
tha uska ye lakshan hai ki koyi yadi mujhe kuch kahta hai ya phhir mujhe chutiya
banata hai toh bawal phhir bawal hona tay hai…Madhulika ke baap ne teen din
pahle mujhe tees hazar ka chuna lagaya tha upar se bahut nautanki bhi ki
thi…isliye saza toh usko deni thi. par kayi baar main confuse bhi ho jata hoon ki
main sach me Narcissism se grasit hoon ya phhir maine ise apnaya hua hai…
Aur yadi main apni baat karu toh yadi mujhe koyi aisi gali deta jaisi ki main is
samay Madhulika ke baap ko de raha tha toh Esha ki Kasam main usko jaan se
maar deta, par main dekhna ye chahta tha ki ab Madhulika ka baap kya karta
hai….Us takle Madharchod ne Madhulika ko do thappad markar khud se door feka
aur mujhe wahi rukne ka bolkar andar gaya…. andar se kayi chizo ke girne ki
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aawaz kuch der tak aati rahi aur jab wo aawaze band hui tab Madhulika ka baap
same to same waisa hee katta lekar mere samne aaya, jaisa ki mere paas tha…usne
Katta mujhpar taana aur meri taraf dheere-dheere badhte hue bola…
“ab bol, kya bol raha tha…madargaddi”
“what the hell is this madar-taka or madar-gaddi…tu randi, teri beti randi, teri
biwi randi, teri maa randi… teri mausi randi… teri chachi randi… teri mami
randi… teri bua randi, teri dadi randi… in short tera pura khandan randi….”
Maine jawab diya. Par jawab dene se pahle maine katta chalaya aur Madhulika ke
baap ka pair khoon se lahu-luhan kar diya…dusari firing maine Madhulika ke
baap ke shoulder me ki…waise mera nishana uska wo hath tha, jis hath se usne
katta pakad rakha tha par firing ke samay jhatke ki vazah se goli uske shoulder me
lagi thi… back to back do goli lagne se aur Madhulika ke baap ke hath se Gun
chhootkar neeche girne ke karan ab pura game mere hath me tha…par main
Madhulika ke baap ke sath jyada kuch kar nahi saka kyunki goli chalne ke turant
baad waha aas-paas rahne wale log andar aa chuke the… wo toh mujhe maar hee
dete lekin mere hath me mauzood katte ki vazah se unme se koyi mere jyada paas
tak nahi aaya….siway Madhulika ke....
“tumne aisa kyun kiya…”jaha-jaha Madhulika ke baap ko goli lagi thi un jagah par
khoon rokne ke liye kapda bandhte hue Madhulika cheekh kar boli….
“kamal hai, first meeting me toh tune kaha tha ki tera baap zinda rahe ya mar
jaye…tujhe koyi fark nahi padta…bas main yahi check kar raha tha ….you failed…
mujhe samajh nahi aata ki log apni baat par kayam kyun nahi rahte…”
“koyi ambulance ko call karo…. Reeta, jaldi call kar… Mani didi , jaldi se call
kariye…. Isne befaltu me mere pitaji ko maar diya, ise jaane mat dena…”
“Janeman, meri zindagi ek circus hai aur main us circus ka joker hoon….zinda
rahne ke liye mujhe perform karna padta hai aur rahi baat yaha se jaane ki toh…
tum sab yaad rakhna ki mere paas”hath me pakde apne katte ko choomte hue
maine kaha “so, get the hell out of here….clear my way, you all 3 dimensional
ordinary people , tum log 3D hokar 4D man ko rokoge aur yadi rok bhi liya toh
main time ko phhir se reset kar dunga”
Katte ki jor me main waha se nikla lekin mere peechhe-peechhe Ganga-Jamuna ke

kayi log pad gaye… wo sab katte ki wajah se toh mujhse thodi doori banaye hue
the, par lagatar mere peechhe-peeche chal rahe the… jis-se meri gand fati aur main
daudkar Daddu ke adde ki taraf bhaga…. wo sab bhi mere peechhe Daddu ke adde
ki taraf bhage…
Daddu aaj bhi apne jhat jaise cabin me baithkar kisi se phone me baat kar raha tha
aur mujhe aata Dekh wo thoda sa muskuraya aur mujhe baithne ka ishara kiya….
“us madarchod ko bol ki apni aukat me rahe warna main uske pure khandan ki
aurato ko ganga-jamuna me randi bana kar unse dhandha karwaunga….”Itna
bolkar Daddu thodi der ke liye chup hua aur phhir cheekhte hue bola…

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“Vidhayak hoga ,wo apne ghar ka… usko bolna ki Daddu ke paas aaj bhi wo randi
hai jiske sath wo dus saal pahle maje kiye karta tha…ek minute lagega mujhe uski
party ki maa chodne me…bhaidchod….mujhe Ajmeri bai ke kothe ki sari randiya
wapas chahiye aur sath me uska name bhi jisne police ko ye bataya ki Ajmeri bai
ke kothe me maine katta chhipa rakha hai….use aur uske pure pariwar ko nanga
karke beech chaurahe me goli nahi mari toh mera name bhi Daddu nahi…Ganga-
jamuna meri jaagir hai. main jab chahu, jaise chahu, jo chahu wo main
karunga…koyi gunda yaha apna laad nahi hilayega aur yadi hilaya toh main uska
lund kaatkar uske maa-bahan ke gand me dal dunga aur tu mera jaldi se ye kaam
kar warna main teri bhi maa chodunga, samjha”bolkar Daddu shant hua aur
dusari oor jo aadmi tha, uski baat sunne laga
“haan..ye ki na mardo wali baat…15 minute ke andar mujhe meri randiya mere
kothe par wapas chahiye…ab phone rakh”
phone rakhkar daddu thodi der ke liye shant hokar idhar-udhar dekhta raha aur
phhir mujhse mukhatib hokar bola….
“sala dhandha karna mushqil kar diya hai,in policewalo ne…. jab se naya S.P.
aaya hai, gand me baans kiye baitha hai.”
“life is like physics Daddu bhai…”
“kya…..kya.kya”
“fucking illetrate”muskurate hue maine kaha “dusare tareeke se samjhata

hoon…life me un logo ko bilkul bhi allow mat karo, jinka role jyada important na
ho….wait………. what the……. Kya ye pahle nahi hua…main jab last time aaya tha
tab bhi aapka Ajmeri ji ke kothe par police ne chhapa markar sabko andar kar diya
tha aur aaj bhi ? same kapde, same time, same dialogues, same expression….what
a coincident, behanchod ye ho kya raha hai…. maine bhi toh same dialogue bola…
main kya bol raha hoon,kyun bol raha hoon…ek minute shuru se shuru karte
hai…”
“dekh…tu jo bhi kuch bhi bola, sab apne neeche se gaya…lekin apun itna samajh
gaya ki tu apun ka mazak bana raha hai…agli baar aisa kuch kiya toh dono
kanpatti pe gun rakhkar dono side se ek hee time pe aisi goli marunga ki sala
confuse ho jayega ki kis side ki goli se mara hai… apun ko tumhara ye chutiyagiri
nahi magta….”
“hua kya….”
“mera pura gun jo maine magwaye the wo police ne pakad liya….”
“Ajmeri bai ke kothe se ?”
“haan….par tere ko kaise maloom be…”
“phone pe baat karte suna na…par you sure ki ye incident aaj hee hua hai…mujhe
aisa kyun lag raha hai ki ye kand teen din pahle hua tha…”

213
“tu kya jhad rela hai…ye aaj hee hua hai aur aadhe ghante pahle hee hua hai…pata
nahi sala kisne inform kiya us bhaidchod s.p. ko…”
“hail physics…”
“kyaaa…”
“physics is simple daddu bhai, so is life…par aajkal situation thodi complicated ho

rahi hai…main aapse baad me milta hoon…bye…”
Main waha se utha aur jaise hee Daddu ke adde se bahar nikla toh mujhe kuch
laga…matlab.. jaise.. koyi… waha kuch tha… koyi energy type chiz… dark matter
ya phhir dark energy…jo ki hidden rahti hai.
Waha bahut sare log Daddu ke adde ke bahar khade the…ye sab wahi log the jo
Madhulika ke ghar se mere peechhe the… un sabko waha dekh main peechhe muda
toh dekha ki Daddu idhar bahar hee aa raha tha…. ek toh ye time repeat hua, upar
se ye log aur ab peechhe se Daddu… kis par concentrate karu…
“tum log yaha kyun jama hue ho…”bahar ki bheed dekhkar Daddu ne gurrate hue
un sabse puchha…
“gaya lawda ab toh… 2.0, any escape plan…?”
“no…”
“apna engineering wala dimag laga aur jaldi se koyi tarqeeb nikal warna aaj gaya
kaam se… main toh first time fasa hoon aisi situation me… tujhe toh kafi ideas
honge”
“is-se pahle ki Daddu tujhe mare, tu Daddu ko maar de… main college me yahi
karta tha… Varun, Naushad, Gautam, Collector ka launda… ”
“sale, tu bachane ka plan bata raha hai ya marwane ka plan bata raha hai… pahle
maloom hota toh…..”
Chapter-21: Recall-2/The Balcony Show

“shukar mana, ki tu chand minutes me time loop se bahar aa gaya.. China me toh
ek aadmi 8 saal tak timeloop me fasa tha…”
“china nahi, Japan be…”
“kya fark padta hai…”
“cigarette piyega…”
“piyunga…do jala…. No sharing”

214
“that’s the spirit…”
Maine do cigarette sulgayi aur dono ko apne muh ke ek-ek side me rakhkar kash
kheechne laga jis-se autowale ka dhyan meri taraf aakarsit hua aur usne do-teen
baar palatkar mujhe…
“ itne me chauk gaya... abhi version 1.0 activate nahi hai, warna beech me bhi ek
cigarette daalkar teen ek sath peeta hoon… ab peechhe mat mudna.. bf dekhkar
mutth marunga, pura dimag ghoom gaya……sala”
.
Mujhe neend nahi aati…din toh phhir main kaise bhi karke kaat leta hoon, lekin
raat mujhe bahut jyada pareshan karti hai... main apni raate ya toh NH-6 me logo
ko lootne me bitata hoon ya phhir koyi engineering ki book uthakar baith jata
hoon aur jab main aisa karta hoon toh mere dimag me pata nahi kya chalte rahta
hai… main khud se baate karta hoon.. khud se sawal karta hoon, un sawalo ke
jawab bhi deta hoon aur ye sari conversation English me hoti hai… yahi mere
dialogues bante hai…jinhe phhir main yaad karke logo ko marta hoon…
“Being comfortable is our biggest enemy and we spend our whole life to get that
comfort.”
Ye meri philosophy hai aur isi se mujhe matlab hai, isiliye raat ke teen baje main
apne comfort ki maa-bahan karke itni kadake ki thand me NH-6 me Katta hath me
liye apne shikar ka intezaar kar raha tha… waise mujhe aaj NH-6 me loot nahi
karni chahiye thi, kyunki pichhale dedh ghante me, jabse main yaha aaya tha
police ki jeep char baar round maar chuki thi… jiski vazah shayad meri pichhali
robbery ho sakti hai.. waise bhi last time jise maine loota tha, wo kafi rahis tha aur
baar-baar mujhe dhamki de raha tha ki wo mujhe chhodga nahi… mere khayal se
usi ne police ko latada hoga jiske baad Police raat me NH-6 ko lekar itni satark ho
gayi thi, nahi toh pahle mushqil se ek raat me ek-do gasht hee police wale lagate
the, par aaj toh unhone kamal hee kar diya tha…
“ye hai paachwa round and as per my observations, Police ka next round 20-25
minute ke baad hoga…”ped ke peechhe se police ki jeep ko jata dekh maine hisab
lagaya..
Main ghanto se apne bas ek shikar ki taalash me tha ki kaise karke bas ek ko pakad
loon, waise bhi aaj-kal jis hisaab se mere kharche hai mujhe ye toh karna hee
padega...wo udhar se ek bike aa rahi hai…
“police ko gaye hue abhi 5 minute hee hue hai… ise salta sakta hoon main…”

215
kahkar main sadak me aaya aur jis taraf se bike aa rahi thi, usi taraf apna chehra
roomal se baandhkar daudne laga aur bike se thodi door pahle ruk-kar bina samay
gawaye apne jacket se katta nikala aur bike ke tyre ko nishana banakar fire kiya…
“dhat…. phhir se hath hil gaya..”
Mera nishana chuka aur Ab bike wala bhi jaan gaya tha ki main uske sath kya
karna chahta hoon isliye usne apni speed thodi kam karke jaha par tha wahi se
bike modne laga… use aisa karta dekh us par nishana banakar main uski taraf
dauda aur wo apni bike puri tarah mod pata us-se pahle hee kafi karib aakar
maine uske pichhe wale tyre me ek bullet ghusa di…
Jis pal bullet us bike wale ke tyre me ghusi usi pal wo bike samet wahi gir gaya aur
ghisat-te hue sadak ke kinare ja pahucha…..
“10 minutes hai mere paas…”us bike wale ki taraf bhagte hue maine ghadi me time
dekhkar khud se kaha aur uske paas jaate hee sabse pahle uske thobde me ek laat
mari…
uska ek pair bike ke neeche daba hua tha, is karan wo jaal me fasi us machhali ke
saman tha jo sirf fudak sakti hai…kar kuch nahi sakti.wo bhi jaal me fasi usi
machhali ke saman gusse se bilakh raha tha, lekin jaise hee maine uske thobde me
jamkar ek laat mari, uska sar road se takraya aur wo shant ho gaya…
“hello… how are you… sorry , mere paas jyada time nahi hai…”uske jacket se uska
wallet nikalte hue maine kaha “tumhe nahi maloom par main kafi entertaining
hoon… tumhe apna show kabhi aur dikhaunga…filhal ke liye tu mujhe bas apne
hath ki angoothi mujhe de de… asali sona hai na..”
“fake gold hai…”
“I like fake gold…”uska hath pakad kar uski ungaliyo se angoothi nikalne ki
koshish karte hue maine kaha…lekin usne apni hatheli mod li… jise seedha karne
ke liye maine paas me pada ek lakdi ka tukda uthaya hua aur uski ungaliyo par do-
teen baar jor-jor se mara , itna jor se ki uske hath se khoon nikalne laga , par ab
uski ungaliya seedhi ho gayi thi ya phhir kahu ki apni ungaliyo ko modne me use
itna dard ho raha tha ki wo apni ungaliya mod hee nahi paya aur maine uske hath
se sone ki angoothi bhi nikal li aur phhir uske gardan ki chain kheech kar waha se
gayab ho gaya…
.
“le..le...le..le.. maja re ,le…le..le…le maja re… ye kya, River view colony ke bahar
police…shit”
216
Colony ke entrance me police ki jeep dekhkar road se kinare hua aur thoda peechhe
ek dukan ki aad lekar police ki harqato par nazar rakhne laga… lekin police ki jeep
jab bahut der tak waha se nahi gayi toh main dukan ki tek lekar wahi zameen me
baitha aur mobile me thermodynamics ka pdf kholkar formulae yaad karne laga…
maine kayi formulae yaad kiye jis dauran ek aisa topic aaya jise dekhkar main
soch me pad gaya… kyunki ye wahi topic tha jiske dauran main aur Arun class me
baithe-baithe college ki ladkiyo ke baare me baad kar rahe the aur yadi meri
yaddasht sahi hai toh wo 4th semester tha shayad…
“hey Arun…”bench par khisakte hue maine genuine tarike se Arun ka abhinandan
kiya aur use baithne ke liye jagah di….
“chusega…”mere bagal me na baithkar mere parallel me jo ek bench thi usme

baith-te hue Arun ne kaha
“haan…chusunga, khol”
“pagal hai kya lawde…”
“thoda-thoda…”
“waise kya tujhe hai pata ki…. Mera matlab, kya tujhe pata hai ki… CS branch me
ek nayi ladki aayi hai, tune use dekha…? Ekdum karri maal hai.ekdum…matlab ye
bade-bade doodh hai uske…pakka bahut log se chudwayi hogi wo…aise…
dekh”apne dono hath se apni chhati ko samet kar Arun bola “dekh aise…aise hee
wo bahut log ka lund apne dono doodh ke beech me li hogi…samajh aaya ? abey bf
me jaise hota hai…”
“maine nahi dekha use abhi tak…”
“nahi dekha… abey dekha hoga. uska muh bhi mast bada hai.. main toh use dekhte
hee samajh gaya tha ki wo do-do ladko ka lund ek sath chus sakti hai… uske honth
bhi ekdum sexy hai, use chodne ke baad uske honth me mutth girane me mast maza
aayega”
“nahi dekha…”
“Esha se fursat milegi tab na dekhega…waise Esha se yaad aaya, kal maine use
Gautam ke sath mall me dekha tha… tu yakin nahi karega par dono wo jhat si film
hai na… name yaad nahi… wo dekhne gaye the aur BC un logo ne fb me status bhi
217
dala tha… kitna kharab taste hai be teri maal ka… yuck…. Is-se acha toh mera lund
dekh lete dono… hostel me. Free me balcony show dikhata un dono ko…”
nice one”Arun ko chup karane ke liye maine fb like wala symbol dikha kar kaha
“tu dekhega ? mera balcony show…kya hua, bur maan gaya kya, abey bol na…
dekhega… tu toh bur maan gaya ”
“main yadi bur maan gaya na toh tera bur hee faad dalunga…”thoda tez aawaz me
maine Arun se kaha.
Meri aawaz abki baar thoda tez thi , jiski vazah se mere aas-paas baithe ladke yaha
tak ladkiya bhi hasne lagi… ab Mechanical department me kaun ladke aur kaun
ladkiya… aur waise bhi us samay mere mahan banne ki process chalu thi, isliye
main ladko aur ladkiyo ke beech me koyi bhed-bhav nahi karta tha…bole toh
chhutta class me laad-gand karta tha… main jitni gali ladko ko deta tha utni gali
ladkiyo ko bhi deta tha… shayad thoda jyada hee…
Toh meri wo bur faad dene wali line sunkar mere agal wale, bagal wale , aage
wale….peeche wale. Nahi peechhe wale nahi, kyunki sabse aakhiri bench par toh
main hee baitha tha… wo sab hasne lage… jiske karan us samay class me mauzood
Vibha mam, jise dekhkar mujhe aksar aisa lagta tha ki shayad main uska crush
hoon…. usne mujhe khada kiya aur puchha ki ye peechhe kya ho raha hai….
Ab Vibha mam se mera relation toh kafi logo ko pata tha ki kaise first year me
pahle usne meri ragging li thi aur phhir MTL bhai(Sidar) ki help se maine uski li
thi… uske baad maine uske sath A walk to the jungle ka khel bhi khela tha aur ab
wo humare college me daily basis ke taur par mauzood thi… par kabhi-kabhi main
sochta hoon ki us din maine I mean Version 2.0 ne Vibha ko jungle me choda kyun
nahi ? jabki mera raasta saaf tha aur ulte ragging ke case me un sabko andar
karwa sakta tha lekin maine police ka sahara kyun nahi liya…? mere khayal se
wahi ek aisa incident tha jisne college me Shri Arman ke varchasva ki neev rakhi…
main choot ka bahut pyasa hoon aur gand ka bhi…. toh phhir maine us din Vibha
ko kyun chhod diya ?
Got it…actually main us samay transition position me tha , yani ki normal insaan
se mahan ban raha tha aur mera wo nirnay is baat ka proof hai ki tum Arman ko
choot dikhakar ya phhir do botal daru dikhakar kharid nahi sakte kyunki un dino
bahut logo ki mere prati ye dharna thi ki Arman ko bas do peg daru pilao, jiske
baad Arman wo sab karega jo tum us-se karwana chahte ho… aise kayi chutiye the
jo aisa sochte the aur jo ab bhi aisa sochte hai unhe mera khulla challenge hai ki
wo meri zindagi ka ek bhi aisa incident le aaye jab maine daru ke liye kuch kiya
ho…I dare you… I double dare you.
Toh main kaha tha…? haan, mujhe Vibha mam ne class se bahar fek diya tha aur
main usko continue na karke ye sab sochne laga tha, waise bhi ye sab live toh ho
nahi raha toh phhir mere dimag me chalti memories ke liye samay ki kya
boundation ? main jab chahu, jaha chahu…jis jagah chahu…apne dimag me past
events ko pause karke kuch aur kar sakta hoon aur phhir kuch samay baad wahi se
resume maar sakta hoon… in short, time ki koyi boundation nahi….
.
Toh us din Jab Vibha mam ne mujhe class se nikala tha… nahi actually jaha last
time maine incident chhoda tha waha par Vibha mam ne mujhe sirf khada karke
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puchha tha ki…peeche aisa kya hua jo sab is tarah has rahe hai par indirectly
Vibha mam jo mujhse puchhna chahti thi wo ye ki “ kyun be bhosdiwale, abki baar
tune kya kiya… burchatte”
“mam, wo Arun mujhse gandi-gandi baate kar raha hai…bolta hai ki mujhe
balcony show dikhayega..”
“silent…..”hasti hui class ko shant karate hue Vibha mam boli “balcony show ? ye
kya hai…”
“wo main aise sabke saamne nahi bata sakta…”
“jab tum class me raho aur teacher padha raha ho toh aisi baate bilkul bhi discuss
mat karo…jo phhir teacher ke saamne bata na sako. Kitna simple hai ye rule ! jo
maine apne first class me hee bataya tha… phhir bhi. tum wo baat abhi mujhe
bataoge ya phhir lunch me hod ko… choice tumhari hai”
“hod ko…..”maine kaha “wo kya hai na mam….ki, jab insult karwani hee hai toh
thoda bade aadmi se karwate hai… daily basis walo se toh main baat bhi nahi
karta toh phhir unse insult karwana toh bahut door ki baat hai”
“no excuse…”
“excuses are good, they give hopes…”
“then get out and go, find your hopes because at the lunchtime you’re gonna need
it…”
“happiness is going outside the class…”apne bench se nikalte hue maine khud se
kaha ,jispar Arun ne ek comment kiya “lavda le le…ab”
jise Vibha mam se share karte hue maine kaha ki “ mama…ye mujhe… Lele …Lele
…pakad le…pakad le…. Bol raha hai…”
“tum logo ne meri class ko kya bana kar rakha hua hai… Arun, out”
“par maaaaam….”
“just get lost, warna sandel utar kar marungi…”
Aur is tarah present me mere mobile me mauzood ek pdf ke ek chhote se formula ko

dekhkar main kayi saalo ka safar karke , time ki boundations ko tod-fod ke ateet
me apne Engineering ke second year me ek class se bahar aaya, jaha mere peechee-
peechhe Arun bhi aaya…. waise Vibha mam ne hum dono ko class ke bahar khade
rahne ke liye kaha tha lekin maine Arun ko dabocha aur use Canteen ki taraf le
jaane laga….
“kya lawda, tere chakkar me aaj hod chodega mujhe…”
“tujhe pata hai , main future se aaya hoon and trust me aisa kuch bhi nahi hoga…
class ke baad Vibha mujhe call karegi aur phhir matter sulajh jayega… don’t

219
worry…”saamne se aati ek item ko dekhkar maine goggle nikalne ke liye apne jeb
me hath dala….par goggle mere jeb me tha hee nahi….
“ye kaise mumkin hai BC, main ek baar apna lund room me bhool sakta hoon lekin
goggle nahi… goggle lagane ke baad hee toh meri creativity jagti hai… kaha bhool
gaya main… ye maal bhi nikal gayi aur ise line bhi nahi de paya main….Arun…
tune mera goggle dekha…dekhaaa…dekhaaaaa…. Bhosdiwale, chotte, mere jeb se
goggle nikal kar tu pahna hai aur idhar main pareshan hoon… wo ladki bhi nikal
gayi…anyway, phhir se peechhe chalte hai…”
Maine class se bahar aakar canteen me jaane wala incident dobara shuru se play
kiya aur abki baar maine class se nikalte hee goggle laga liya tha…
“tujhe pata hai , main future se aaya hoon and trust me aisa kuch bhi nahi
hoga…class ke baad Vibha darling mujhe call karegi aur phhir matter sulajh
jayega…don’t worry…”
“bola toh ki sab sulajh jayega…trust me, I’ve seen the future…”
“kaan me Divya ne moot diya kya….”
“ajeeb chodu hai be bhosdiwale…teri cd kaha atak gayi…”
Maine apne aaju-baju dekha tab mujhe pata chala ki actually cd Arun ki nahi balki
meri atki hui thi….maine dekha ki hum dono aage jaane ke liye kadam toh badha
rahe hai, par aage badh nahi rahe… hum dono bas wahi par atak gaye the aur tab
mujhe samjah aaya ki jaise hee maine future wali baat ki time ne mere ghadi ki sui
hee atka di thi…
bole toh “kya lawda, tere chakkar me aaj hod chodega mujhe…”
Ye humare conversation ki aakhiri line thi aur uske baad jo maine kaha wo sab bas
aise hee kahi kho gaya tha, Arun ne use suna tak nahi… ek akshar bhi nahi… isliye
main ab chup raha aur bas….chup heee raha…..
Par ye toh flashback tha na…? phhir main yaha kaise fas sakta hoon ya phhir ye
time travel hai ? yani ki……… mere lawde lage hue hai.
main taqriban ek ghante tak wahi, waise hee repeat steps marte hue khada raha
aur phhir ek ghante baad humare kadam aage badhna shuru ho gaye….
“Arman, yar ek maal patwa na… kam se kam ek kiss hee dila de yar, kuch toh maza
le loon zindagi ka… waise bhi Engineering ke baad zindagi jhat hone wali hai…”

220
“ek Engineer ko kabhi ladki ke peechhe nahi bhagna chahiye… tu railway ke exams
ki taiyari kar…kyunki baki toh tujhse kuch hone nahi wala aur ye ladki-wadki
chhod…”
“why”
“first, a Girl will become the reason of your distraction and then destruction… daru
is better than girls…. cigarette piyega ?”
.
River view colony ke gate se police aadhe ghante me gayi, pata nahi wo River View
ke hawaldar…I mean chaukidar…I mean guard se kya puchh-tachh kar rahi
thi.par jo bhi puchh-tachh kar rahi thi..mujhe ek baat toh clear ho gayi thi ki abhi
us Guard ko ye nahi maloom chalna chahiye ki main abhi bahar hoon, isliye
maine… main gate se andar na jakar colony ki 8 feet lambi deewar kood kar andar
jaane ka socha…..
“people are bad…”deewar me chadhkar maine kaha….
“why…”
“people are bad, they waste my time… ab police ko hee dekh le, yadi police yaha
nahi aayi hoti toh main is waqt apne room me baithkar biryani kha raha hota…”
“tu non-veg khane laga, congrats…”
“veg-biryani….”
“main bhi khaunga…”
“isiliye toh do full plate order kiya hai… waise main teen karne wala tha. ek
Aradhna ke liye bhi…lekin uska kuch bharosa nahi ki wo kab aati hai aur kab jati
hai… aaj toh sixth door bhi gayab hai… isliye phhir teesara plate cancel karwa
diya par yadi wo aa gayi toh ?”
“aa gayi toh kya, ladki hee toh hai…kitna khayegi.. do-do chammach de denge
usko…”
“hmm.. nice….”E-5 ke saamne se guzarte hue maine kaha “yar , Vandana Mam so
gayi hongi kya…”
“aur nahi toh kya ?”
“use jakar uthau kya…”
“no… police case kar degi..”
“phhir utha hee deta hoon…”
“abey nahi…”
“chup be… mera kya ukhad legi wo aur yadi jyada natak ki toh maarkar yahi aas-
paas gaad dunga…kisi ko hawa bhi nahi lagega….”
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“par pahle gaddha toh khod le…warna baad me kisi ne gaddha khodte hue dekh
liya toh… waise bhi subah hone wali hai”
“itna tension kyun leta hai, tujhe kya lagta hai ki main ye sab aise hee karta hoon…
abey mera har movement jo main karta hoon wo sab pre-planned hote hai aur yadi
mere plan me Vandana Rathi ki maut likhi hogi toh maregi aaj Sali…”
Main Vandana Rathi ke boundary wale gate aur zameen ke beech wale gap se
sarak kar andar gaya aur koodkar style se ek laat Vandana Rathi ke darwaje par
mari….
“yee Raaand , Vandana…”hijdo jaisi aawaz nikal kar maine kaha aur thik usi
prakar tali mari jis prakar hijde train me marte hai…
“aeeee, Randi Rathi…. Denaa…”uchak kar phhir se ek laat Vandana Rathi ke gate
me marte hue maine kaha… “gate khol de Rathi, warna teri pond me garam rod
chhua dungi main…”
Ektaraf idhar main tha ki acting pe acting kiye jaa raha tha aur dusari taraf
Vandana Mam thi ki darwaja kholne ka naam hee nahi le rahi thi… darwaja na
khole… kam se kam koyi aahat toh ho… par jab aisa kuch bhi nahi hua toh khunnas
me main peechhe gaya aur full raftaar me daudkar gate ko takkar dekar todne ka
socha…
“dekh, abhi apun yaha se full speed me jayega aur gate ko todte-fodte andar entry
marunga… kyunki main darwaja todne ke baad zameen me girunga aur us samay
koyi mujhpe attack karke mujhe maar na de…isliye zameen me neeche girte hee
main dhada-dhad goliya chalana shuru kar dunga… ready ?”
“as always”
Maine boundary ki deewar se full speed pakdi aur full speed me Vandana Rathi ke
gate ki taraf bhaga…. mujhe puri ummid thi ki is-se mera kaam ho jayega aur
Vandana mam ke gate ko tod-fod kar main seedhe andar daakhil ho jaunga… lekin
jab main ye karnama kar raha tha yani jab main boundary wall ko chhookar gate
ki taraf bhaga tabhi is dauran gate ki taraf bhagte hue mera pair ghas me fisla aur
mera jo angle of projection tha wo thoda sa divert ho gaya jiski vazah se main gate
se na takra kar muh aur kandhe ke bal deewar se takraya….
“behan…….chod….”apne thobde ko pakad kar dabate hue maine kaha…
Meri halat is samay bahut nazuk thi… khair wo toh har waqt hoti hai par is samay
seriously meri halat bahut kharab thi aur aise me Vandana Rathi ke flat me
halchal hui… par mujhme ab itni himmat nahi thi ki main hil bhi saku… mere
sharir ke pure purje is waqt dharashayi ho gaye the aur mere dimag ne bhi mera
sath chhod diya tha upar se police ke siren ki aawaz ne mere sharir me kapkapi
paida kar di…
“aaj toh gaye thik tarike se… ab police pahle mujhe pakdegi aur phhir mere room
ki taalashi legi jisme use bullets aur chori ki hui jwellery milegi aur phhir mera
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kaam tamam…. Vandana ne bhi kya kamal ka game khela, khud darwaja kholne ke
bajay police ka number dial kar diya… bas chand minutes me police wale yaha
honge aur main jail me…”
“common yar…uth yaha se aur boundry se palti maarkar apne boundary me entry
maar….”
“mushqil hai… kyunki jab tak main taala khol kar andar ghusunga police wale
mujhe dekh lenge”
“koshish toh kar…nahi dekhenge…”
“trust me, I have seen the future….”
“chal phhir thodi help kar…mere bas ki baat nahi hai ab”
“installing Shri Arman version 2.0 ….”
“permission granted…”
Chapter-22: Sharda Enterprises-2
Aur phhir maine apne andar bachi-kuch energy store ki aur pura jor lagakar utha
aur boundary koodkar E-5 se E-6 me aaya…. Girte-padte jaldi-jaldi me maine room
ka gate khola aur phhir andar jakar turant gate band kiya….
“dekha bola tha na…”
“chup be, uninstalling 2.0…”

.
Mere kandhe ka toh bura haal tha hee par mujhe fikar mere thobde aur thuddi ki
thi, jisme kayi jagah khoon jam gaya tha par mere beard ke karan wo dikh nahi
raha tha… mere mathe par left side me bhi halke-fulke zakhm ke nishan the, jinpar
maine band aid bandha aur painkiller khakar do ghante baad jab suraj nikla toh
apni chhat par pahucha….. chhat par abhi mast thandi-thandi hawa chal rahi thi
isliye main wahi chhat me rakhi chair par baitha aur E-5 ki taraf dekhne laga….. E-
5 ke kitchen ki khidki khuli hui thi aur us khuli hui khidki me se Vandana Rathi
mujhe saaf-saaf nazar aa rahi thi… meri nazar khidki se hote hue jaise hee
Vandana Rathi ke nightgown aur nightgown ke uske ubhar par padi toh mujhe
yaad aaya ki kal sham ko toh mujhe Vandana Rathi ko jawab dena tha ki main
Sharda Enterprises dobara join karunga ya nahi….
“phhir se bhool gaya… abhi jaun…? Ya na jaun…. Rahne de, kahi chamkane na
lage…. Waise bhi bahut ghamand hai usko….”
“yaar… bhad me gaya sab kuch, Rathi ke paas chale jata hoon…”khada hokar
maine kaha aur ahista-ahista apne flat se nikalkar ahista-ahista Rathi ke flat me
daakhil hua…. matlab ekdum flat ke andar nahi… bas boundary ke andar jakar us
gate ke paas pahucha, jise todne ki koshish me kal raat main toot gaya tha… maine
darwaje par aaram se dastak di….
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“Arrrmaaan…. Good……Morning…”gate kholkar pause lete hue VR boli…
“itni jyada spelling mistake, wo bhi mere name me…anyway, Good morning to you
too..”
“tumhari shakl ko kya hua…”
“basketball practice…”
“really ?”happiness aur shocking wale expression ek sath dete hue Vandana mam
boli “I love basketball… tum sach me basketball khelte ho…”
“khelta hoon ?... bitch please, I am a national player”
“mujhe , lip reading nahi aati…isliye jo bolna hai… sound effect ke sath bolo…”
“khelta hoon ? mam… main national player hoon…”
“oh great… common come on in…”mujhe andar aane ka prastaav dekar Vandana
Rathi boli
“kamal hai, main itne din se Vandana Rathi ke flat me ghusne ke liye itne tikadam-
tikdi kar raha tha , par ye toh mujhe aise hee aane de rahi hai…pahle pata hota toh
kal raat wala accident toh nahi hota…”andar Vandana mam ke ghar ko aur ghar ki
ek-ek chiz ko gaur se dekh kar maine socha… “isne kya maintain karke rakha hai
ghar ko, akele sofa hee 4-5 lakh ka hoga, lagta hai…wah yar, itna mahanga aur
achchha sofa toh mere ghar me bhi nahi tha aur na hee Varun ke ghar me… kafi
maaldar party hai ye… aur shayad kunwari bhi hai… isi se shadi kar loon kya…?
Boss ko chod raha hoon ye sochkar sex karte waqt uttejana bhi badhegi , mera lund
toh abhich khada ho gaya. upar se main aisi ladkiyo ke prati jyada attracted rahta
hoon jo ekdum hot ho aur ghamandi bhi… ise jab zameen kutiya banakar
chodunga toh kitna maza aayega us waqt mujhe aur jab iske muh me mutth
marunga tab toh….. aaahhhh…..”
“coffee…? ”
“do cup…”
“do cup…? ”
“psychological problem, aap nahi samjhogi…”
“toh phhir samjhao… apna talent dikhao…”
“tujhe toh main kuch aur dikhaunga…”
“maine kaha na ki, mujhe lip reading nahi aati…”
“wo actually, mujhe lagta hai ki jab main school me tha tab main… main nahi tha
tab koyi aur mere sharir me tha… jo ab ye sharir chhodkar ja chukka hai par
school ki tamam yaadein de gaya hai… use main Arman 1.0 kahta hoon… phhir
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main college me pahucha aur meri puri life change ho gayi… mera behaviour…
mera baat karne ka andaaz, kisi bhi situation me mera reaction… sabkuch kafi
unexpected tarike se bahut jaldi change hua… jo ki school wale Arman se bahut
jyada alag tha isliye maine use dusara Arman mana…yaani ki Arman 2.0 aur ab
yani ki college ke baad main kitna badla ye toh mujhe nahi maloom par meri life
bahut jyada badli aur usi ke sath me main bhi… isliye maine…”
“Arman 3.0”
“haan latest version yahi hai par sochane wali baat ye hai ki Arman 2.0 ab bhi
mere andar hai, main us-se baat karta hoon… uski salaah leta hoon vagerah-
vagerah…actually main kahna ye chah raha hoon ki mujhe aisa feel hota hai jaise
mere sharir toh ek hai lekin atma do hai… ya phhir mera sharir kisi mobile ki tarah
hai, dual sim supported I mean dual soul supported…. ”
“Version two and Version three… intereting, very interesting”apni hasi rokne ki
koshish karte hue Vandana mam ne do cup coffee mere saamne rakh kar boli “ye
left wali Version 2.0 ke liye aur right wali 3.0 ke liye…how funny is that...you’re
lying , right ?”
“maine pahle hee kaha tha ki ye sab psychological baatein hai, aap nahi
samjhogi…”Vandana Rathi ko haste hue dekh maine mayoos hokar kaha aur dono
coffe ke cup ek sath uthakar bari-bari se ek ke baad ek cup ka coffee peene laga…
“okay…okay… kaam par aate hai… tum Shardaa…”
“main join karunga…”uski baat puri hone se pahle hee maine kah diya aur phhir
jab mujhe ye ralize hua toh maine socha ki…abey ye maine kya kah diya… mera
plan toh Vandana Rathi ke is offer ko reject karne ka tha… phhir maine…. what the
fuck… ab kya karu… version 2.0 ? bhai…help
“wahi bol de….sorry main , join nahi kar sakta ,wo toh aapke doodh dekhkar flow-
flow me… join karunga, muh se nikal gaya…”
“no…never..”
“mujhe lagta hai, lip reading ka course kar hee lena chahiye..kyun ?”mujhe beech
me tok kar Rathi mam boli “waise mujhe achchha laga ki tumne humara offer
swikar kar liya… mujhe laga nahi tha ki tum dobara join karoge”
“ache log isliye ache nahi hote kyunki wo sirf apne bare me acha sochate hai”
“iska kya matlab ?”
“kuch nahi…dialogue tha, so mar diya… warna bhool jata… bhool toh main waise
ab bhi jaunga par atleast ab kahi darj toh rahega…”
Maine apni ungali(index) Vandana Rathi ke seene ki taraf ki aur phhir jaise hee
mujhe hosh aaya toh maine turant hee us ungali ko chatkate hue puchha“mam,
aap doodh kaha se leti hai..”

225
“sorry ?”
“doodh… milk… wo doctor ne doodh ke sath tablet khane ko kaha hai toh…”
“mere paas uska number hai… wo main tumhe de sakti hoon..”
“thank you mam, toh kab se join kar sakta hoon main…”
“abhi tumhari haalat mujhe thik nahi lag rahi…abhi tum kuch din rest karo… main
tumhe inform kar dungi…”
“I’m fine… main aaj se hee join kar leta hoon…”khade hokar maine kaha
Sharda Enterprises:- mere sapno ka jahaan… jaha main formal dress me baith kar
computer ke saamne kaam karta, jaha logo ko meri kabiliyat ki parakh hoti…wo
meri izzat karte… mera samman karte aur ek hot si sexy si…. Lady boss.. jo mujh
par fida ho…. ye tha mere bachpan ka mera sapna jo Bollywood filmo ko dekhkar
maine dekha tha aur phhir jaise-jaise meri umra badhi aur mera rujhan
Hollywood ki taraf shift hua toh is sapne ko jaise main kahin bhool hee gaya tha…
par aaj Sharda Enterprises ke bathroom ke aaine me khud ko dekhkar jab maine
pant ki chain band ki toh mujhe mere bachpan ka wo sapna yaad aaya…..
“tabhi main sochu ki maine haan kyu kar diya… toh ye sab maine apne bachpan ke
sapne ko sakar karne ke liye kiya aur ye sach bhi hua… lekin phhir main khush
kyun nahi hoon ”aaine me khud ko dekhkar maine kaha “ye formal dress utni buri
bhi nahi hai… ekdum tight fitting hai… kitna jach rela hoon main..upar se tie
lagaunga toh… toh Sharda Enterprises me kaam karne wali ladkiya toh mere
kapde hee faad dalengi aur mera lund nikal kar choosne lagegi…”
Jeb se nikalkar maine tie…tie ki aur phhir full role me bathroom se nikalkar apni
seat ki taraf jaane laga… Office me kaam karne wale adhiktar youngsters the aur
hum sab ek-dusare ko by name toh nahi par by face zaroor jaante the… toh is tarah
ye probability bhi banti hai ki by face kuch log mujhe bhi jaante honge aur kyunki
main aaj itne din baad unhe dekh raha tha shayad isiliye wo sab mujhe thoda
ghoor kar dekh rahe the… actually ghoor ka nahi dekh rahe the, sirf dekh rahe
the… lekin maine sabko ignore mara aur aage badhta raha… badhta raha aur itna
aage badh gaya ki mujhe ghoomkar wapas peechhe aana pada… is dauran maine
dekha ki office ki me kaam karne wali kuch khobbsurat aur badsurat ladkiya
water cooler ke paas paani peete hue aapas me ek-dusare se baat kar rahe the
“Sali, sab rakhail hai…sab Ganga-Jamuna me jakar gand marwati hai… inki maa
ko chod dalu… chhinar Sali… dil toh karta hai ki ek-ek ke gand me katta dalkar
inke gand me goli maru… wo bahanchod corner wali kaise phone me apne dalal se
baat kar rahi hai… zaroor kutiya aaj raat ka apna programme fix kar rahi hogi…
sab Sali randiya hai… kaise maadharchodo ne itne kam-kam kapde pahan ke rakhe
hai… aisa hee chalta raha toh kuch din baad toh ye nangi hee office aayengi…
dayichod… mera katta abhi bag me hai nahi toh teen-char ko toh abhiyech khallas
kar dalta… inki maa ka pakoda… bhosdiwaliya… aur wo white shirt wali, jo right
corner me baithi hai, kaise office me kaam karne wale Jagat ke upar chilla rahi
hai… us lawdi ko samajhna chahiye ki yadi wo Jaggu itna hee padha likha hota toh
kya yaha wo peon ki hasiyat se hota…Sali anpadh ,gawar… mujhse bhide toh main
uski dayya-mayya chod dun aur ye lawde water cooler ke paas kab se khade hai,
226
madarchod ladki kya paa gaye, water cooler ko hee apna lovers point bana liya
inhone… yaha kaam karne aate hai ya muchodi karne... mujhe samajh nahi aata ki
log meri tarah pure professional kyun nahi hote… Main yaha ka Boss ya Manager
hota toh in sabke pichhwade me chabuk mar-mar ke inka pichhwada laal kar
deta… lekin mujhe kya, maa chudaye ye log aur ye company… main toh bas apna
chutiyapa katne yaha aaya hoon… jo ki kat raha hai… baki rest is waste… sale
chhote log… I hate them... all of them”
Apni tie ko tight karte hue main apni seat par baitha aur software se machine parts
ki design check karne laga… main bahut der tak bina kisi se baat kiye silently apna
kaam karta raha aur phhir jab mujhe pyas lagi toh maine apni gardan uthakar
Jagat ko aawaz di… jo ki door ek ladki ke paas file lekar khada hua tha….
“file wahi rakh de aur ek glass paani lekar aa…”ishare se maine Jagat ko kaha,
jiske jawab me Jagat ne mujhe do ungaliya dikhayi… yani ki do minutes.
Isliye main wapas apne kaam me lag gaya lekin jab thodi der baad bhi Jagat paani
lekar nahi aaya toh mera matha thanka aur abki baar maine thode uche aawaz me
Jagat ko aawaz di….
“Jagat, come here…”
“mam se shikayat kar dungi yadi tu yaha se hila bhi toh… main bahut important
kaam kar rahi hoon aur jise chay, coffee peeni hai wo khud uthkar pee le, pata nahi
kaha-kaha se recruitment me bhar lete hai inhe… kuch aata-jata toh hai nahi,
company ki Tea-coffee peekar bas masti marte rahte hai… tu yahi khada rah…
samjha.”
“ye kya tha be…?”us ladki ki aawaz , jiske paas files ka bandal pakad kar Jagat
khada tha , uski aawaz sunkar maine khud se kaha “isne kya wo sab mujhe kaha ?
nahi… mujhe kaise kah sakti hai… mujhe toh wo jaanti bhi nahi aur bina jaane-
pahchane koyi apne fellow worker ko kaise itna sab kuch kah sakta hai… nahi…
nahi , usne ye mujhse nahi kaha hoga… kisi aur se kaha hoga…Jaggu…? Jaggu se
kaha hoga… par usne toh kisi aur ko indicate karke kaha tha aur wo… koyi aur
nahi… balki main tha…”
“lol, itni bhari insult… peechhe dekh kaise sab log tujhe dekh kar has rahe hai… jaa
bathroom me mutth maar kar mar jaa… 2.0 se bada samajh raha tha na khud ko ?
ab kya hua, bolti band ho gayi…”
“usne wo sab mujhe nahi kisi aur ko kaha…”
“achchha jab Jaggu aayega tab us-se puchh lena…”
Jab se meri dusari antaratma ne mujhe ye ahsaas karaya tha ki us ladki ne mujhe
chamkaya hai tabhich se mere dil ki dhadkane tez hone lagi thi… mera sharir
kanpne laga tha. main ek pal nervous hota toh dusare pal pratishodh ka magma
mere andar dahakne laga… mujhe maloom hai ki main bahut sahasi hoon aur
maine apna ye sahas samay-samay par dikhata bhi rahta hoon… pahle school me,
phhir apne ghar me, phhir apne college me, phhir River View Colony me , phhir
Vandana Rathi ke cabin me, phhir NH-6 me aur phhir Ganga-Jamuna me…. lekin
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ye office pata nahi mujhe kyun nervous kar raha tha, upar se mere peechhe baithe
mere sathi workers ki hasi mujhe aur nervous kar rahi thi… sach kahu toh meri
puri tarah fat chuki thi aur main bas office se kahi bhag jaana chahta tha… kahi
bhi… phhir chahe wo mera ghar ho ya phhir Varun ka flat A-3… main is waqt kahi
bhi jaa sakta tha bas office me nahi rahna chahta tha… jaise-jaise office me samay
beet raha tha, mere dil ki dhadkane tez hoti jaa rahi thi aur kuch der baad toh main
sharm ke maare apna sar uthakar aas-paas bhi nahi dekh paa raha tha… main
chah raha tha ki kash ye sab sapna ho… kash ye sab mere dimag ki upaj ho aur
aisa ho bhi sakta hai kyunki The Great Arman ki insult bhala koyi kaise kar sakta
hai aur yadi usne kar bhi diya toh phhir The Great Arman kuch kar kyun nahi
raha… ye sach me sapna hee hai… 100 %.
.
“sorry bhau, wo Princi mam aisi hee hai… do saal senior hai na toh sab par raub
jhadte rahti hai… aaj aap ko sunna pad gaya… waise welcome back…”
“welcome back ke bachche… usne sach me mujhe hee batti di kya…”
“haan… waise aap mujhe kisliye bula rahe the…”
“jaa aur jaakar ek cup chay laa…”
Jagat jaldi se waha se gaya aur ek cup chay mere liye le aaya… iske baad wo smile
marte hue mere paas hee khada ho gaya…
“kya…”usko aise smile marte dekh maine puchha
“aaj toh de hee do Arman bhai…”
“kya de du…”
“wahi…”
“chal bhag yaha se….ek toh sale,us laundi…kya name hai uska…”
“Princi…”
“haan, princi…ek toh us Princi se bezzati karwa di aur…. Chal ja paani lekar aa…”
Jagat ko toh hadka kar maine use paani lane ke liye bhej diya lekin mere andar ab
bhi Princi aur uski kahi hui baat mere dil-o-dimag me ghoom rahi thi… actually
main is chiz ko accept hee nahi kar paa raha tha ki kisi ne meri insult ki aur main
us insult ko chup-chap sah gaya… apni insult toh maine Supritendent of Police ke
saamne nahi sahi thi aur uske saamne Collector ke launde ki chhati par ek laat
mara tha , wo bhi uske thane me… phhir aaj main kyun ghabra raha hoon… mujhe
toh aisa feel ho raha hai jaise ki main hakla hoon aur us Princi ke saamne
dialogues tak nahi bol paunga…kya sach me main hakla hoon…. Let me check…
“I’m Arrrrrr…rrman and my fav. Movie is Th…th..the Shawshank

Redemption….dhat teri ki main toh sach me hakla raha hoon… ye bimari kab se lag
gayi mujhe…”
228
“chup be bhosdiwale… kab se dekh raha hoon, chutiyape pe chutiyape kiye jaa
raha hain…I mean, soche ja raha hai… tujhse kuch nahi hoga… mujhe lead role me
aane de…”
“denied… River View Colony ka kaand bhoola nahi hoon main…”
“soch le, phhir… tere fans kya sochenge.. wo toh jeete jee mar jayenge.. fans ko
chhod, wo toh kisi tarah adjust bhi kar lenge…lekin tu… tu kaise rahega phhir…
abhi kuch der me hee tera BP high aur low hone laga hai…tu insult hone ke sirf do
minute ke andar hee hakla ban gaya toh phhir soch baad me tujhe kitni problem
hogi… ek Aradhna kam hai kya jo tu aur aantarik samsyo ko bulava de raha hai…
install me and everything will be okay…”
“sub soul 2.0 selected…”
“let’s begin the fun….”
Tab tak Jagat paani ka glass lekar aa chukka tha… maine paani ka glass uthaya
aur pura pani gatak gaya… ab main ekdum normal feel kar raha tha… maine
Princi ki taraf dekha, jaha se baithkar usne mujhe batti di thi , par wo waha nahi
thi….
“wo kaha gayi be…”apni baah sikodte hue maine Jagat se puchha
“kaun…”
“wahi…Princi…”
“wo udhar, thande pani wali machine ke paas hai”
“uske sath me jo ladka khada hai, jis-se wo baat kar rahi hai…wo kaun hai…”
“wo Princi mam ka boy-frend hai… badi mushqil se pati hai us-se, pati kya ye bolo
Bhau ki bas loot rahi hai launde ko…”
“tujhe kya lagta hai hum dono me kaun jeetega…”
“muhchodi me ?”
“muhchodi me toh main use hara hee dunga… main shareerik ladai ki baat kar
raha hoon, yadi by chance wo Princi ko bachane aaya toh use bhi marna padega
na… isiliye… tujhe kya lagta hai… kaun jeetega…”
“kaun jeetega….”mujhe ek baar gaur se dekhkar Princi ke boyfriend se compare

karte hue Jaggu ne kaha “barabar ki takkar lagti hai mujhe…”
“chal phhir, jhel lunga main…”apni ungaliya chatkate hue maine kaha aur apni
gardan gol-gol ghumayi….
“phhir ho jaye aaj ”

.
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Jab maine Princi se badla lene ka socha tha, tab wo water cooler ke paas thi aur
sath me uska boyfriend bhi tha, lekin ab waha aur bhi do char log aa gaye the… wo
waha bahut der tak khade rahe aur aapas me baat karte rahe… itne saare anjaan
logo ko waha dekh main phhir se nervous hone laga… main chahta tha ki waha
jitna kam bheed ho wo situation mere liye utni hee achchhi hogi. Main chahta tha
ki jinka role is story me na ke barabar hai wo waha na hee rahe aur jald se jald
waha se khisak jaye…. Par aisa sochane wala main waha akela nahi tha, waha ek
aisa prani bhi tha…jise mujhse jyada jaldi thi….
“kya hua bade bhai… jao na…”
“chup be Haggu… sorry, Jaggu… dekh nahi raha waha kitne log hai aur sale, tujhe
itni jaldi kyu hai be”
“wo ek hafte pahle us Princi mam ne apun ko sabke saamne ek thappad marela
tha…”
“aur tune use chhod diya…?”
“apun complain kiyela tha Rathi mam ke paas, par unhone ulta apun ko hee
warning de dali ki kaam karna hai toh dhang se karo… ab pet ka sawal tha nahi
toh apun dikhata usko ki apun bhi apni gali ka sher hai”
“pet ka sawal tha ? abey bakchod… pet tu bheekh mang kar bhi bhar sakta hai,
lekin jo izzat usne teri utari hai…. use tu kaha se layega…anyway, mujhe ab bhi
halka-halka dar lag raha hai ki aage kya hoga … kahi main word-war me haar
gaya toh ? word-war me aaj tak hara nahi hoon main”
“tu dar kyun raha hai…. tu bas khada ho aur style se unke paas jaa…. Baki apun
hai na…”2.0 meri himmat badhate hue bola….
“pakka na…”
“100 %”
“chal phhir….”
Main apni seat se utha, goggle lagaya , shirt ki collar upar ki aur tie dheeli karte
hue water cooler ki taraf badha…. Main is samay chewingum chabane ki acting
kar raha tha taaki main cool lag saku…. Mujhe water cooler ke paas aata dekh
Princi ke aas-paas khade laundo-laundiyo ko Princi se dheere se kuch kaha aur wo
sab mujhe dekhkar hasne lage…. Main waha water cooler se thodi doori par ruka
aur khada hokar chup-chap unhe dekhne laga… mujhe nahi pata ki unme se ek
ladka jaan-buchkar mere aur water cooler ke raaste me khada tha ya phhir
anjaane me… main uske paas gaya aur use dhakel kar bola….
“chal be, baju hat… aankh se bahra hai kya, dikhai nahi deta ki 4-D man aa raha
hai aur by the way ye tum logo ka lovers point nahi hai…jo yaha khade hokar ek-
dusare ko daant dikha rahe ho… baki workers ko, jo yaha kaam karne aate hai
unhe problem hoti hai…yadi tum logo ko group sex karna hai toh kahi dusari jagah
230
jakar karo aur tu sun be… tu aainda mere aur water cooler ke raaste me aaya na…
toh sale aisa jhapad marunga na ki… teen tarike se mootega… thanda, garam aur
gunguna…… pata nahi kaha-kaha se recruitment me bhar lete hai nallo ko… kuch
aata-jata toh hai nahi, company ki Tea-coffee peekar bas masti marte rahte
hai…”maine chilla kar kaha… actually chilla kar nahi normal hee kaha tha, jis-se
aas-paas wale log bhi sun le aur upar tak baat bhi na pahuche….
.
Ab yaha par mera ek sawal hai ki aap ek company join karte ho… gand faad
mehnat karte ho… do-teen saal apne boss ki chat-te ho is aas me ki future me boss
kaam aayega ya phhir promotion me aasani hogi aur Boss ye sab na bhi kare toh
kam se kam office me chhutti lene me toh aasani hogi… phhir do saal baad aapki
promotion hoti hai, aapke saamne new recruitment wale chhore-chhoriya aate
hai… wo sab aapko sir-mam bolte hai aur wo aapki thik waise hee chat-te hai jaise
aapne apne boss ka chata tha…jabki unhe maloom hota hai ki aapki chatne se unhe
kuch nahi milega… wo toh aapke through company ka jo main boss hai wo uski
chat rahe hote hai aur unhone is kaam ke liye aapko isliye chuna kyunki unhe pata
hai ki aapse bada chattu is office me koyi nahi hai…. aap unhe baat-baat me
chamkate ho…apna raub dikhate ho… bematlab hee unhe pareshan karte ho, unhe
dara kar rakhte ho, thik waise hee jaise pahle college me senior, junior ko daba kar
rakhte the… wo sab aapse darte hai aur us dar ke karan aapki izzat karte hai par
ek din unhi me se ek ladka aapki us sari mehnat, sare dar, sari izzat par achanak se
moot deta hai… kaisa lagega aapko ? I’m sure ki aapko gussa hee aayega us ladke
par… par pahle aap shocked hoge ki BC kaise ek naya launda aapki izzat utar sakta
hai… how it is possible ? aapki gand fat jayegi, aapko aisa lagega jaise kisi ne
aapki gand me ek mota danda dala ho aur phhir us dande me jor se laat maar di
ho… bole toh ghanghor bezzati
.
Kuch yahi reaction waha water cooler ke paas mauzood un logo ka tha… wo sab
apna muh faad ke mujhe dekhe ja rahe the . unke liye jaise samay rook sa gaya
tha… ya phhir unke sharir se unki jaan yamraj ne kheech li thi… unka muh fata
hua tha ur wo sab mujhe ghoor rahe the…. Aisa hee kuch haal, us hall me mauzood
unke sathi aur mere sathio ka tha… matlab sab shocked the… yaha tak ki main
bhi… main isliye shocked tha ki log itne shocked kyun hai. main waha thodi der ke
liye khada raha aur intezaar karta raha ki shayad ab… ki shayad ab… ki ab…
saamne se koyi reply aayega… lekin saamne se koyi reply nahi aaya.. jiski vazah
se maine glass me paani liya aur waha se chalta bana….
.
“hey you idiot… stop.”jab main paani ka glass lekar apne seat ki taraf ja raha tha
toh mujhe peechhe se ek lady ki aawaz sunayi di…
“yes, bitch…”palatkar maine kaha.. nahi, palat kar nahi… balki palat-te hue kaha.
dono me kafi antar hai
“tumne mujhe bitch kaha…”
“yes bitch…”
“main tumhari senior hoon… ye Sharda Enterprises ka head office hai aur tum
yaha aisi cheap language ka istemaal kar rahe ho… anapadh… “
231
“language cheap nahi hoti, bhavnaye cheap hoti hai… bitch. For example, yadi
main apne dost Arun se bolu ki bitch… toh wo bura nahi manega… lekin tum bura
maan gayi… actually bhavnaye bhi cheap nahi hoti, log cheap hote hai aur
tum……um-hmm”
“tujhe tameej nahi hai kya be, sale ek fight marunga na toh tera pura kriyakaram
ho jayega… tu Princi mam se aise baat kaise kiya be… rook tu…”Jagat ke according
jo ladka Princi ka boy-frend tha wo meri taraf badha aur jaise uske tevar the uske
anusar toh ye ladayi hatha-payi ka roop dharan karne wali thi….
“sale, hum tere senior hai yaha… seniors ki respect karna seekh warna zindagi
bhar yahi isi post me latka ke rakhunga tujhe…”
“tujhe itna dard kyun ho raha hai… anyway, jo mere se kam handsome hota hai us-
se toh main baat hee nahi karta,isliye tu hat aur Princi janeman ko saamne bhej,
kyun be second division… bahut udd rahi thi thodi der pahle… abey Sali tu Princi,
2nd division me paas hone wali.. tujhe toh main ek mukka aise dum lagakar
marunga na ki teri ulti saans chalni lagegi… khud ko dekh.. ugly bitch, tere upar ke
baal se jyada straight toh mere neeche ke baal hai aur tu mujhe hoshiyari de rahi
thi…”
“look, I don’t know your name…”
“don’t worry, you’re gonna remember my name for your entire life.. aur tu
launde… aainda se tu aukat me rahna warna isi office me ghaeet-ghaseet ke
marunga, phhir jo ukhadna ho ukhad lena aur Princi janeman, ye chutiya tera
boyfriend hai…thoo.. is-se acha toh Arun dikhta hai aur…. Arun bahut kharab
dikhta hai… aise logo ko bhai banaya kar aur tu launde, ye jhat jaisi ladki teri
girlfriend hai… thoo, is-se achchha toh Nisha ki saheliya dikhti hai jinhe dekhne
tak ka mera mann nahi karta… iska figure dekh aur mujhe bata ki aisa kya hai
isme jo tu itne dino se iske peechhe pada hai… is-se achchha toh tere peechhe wali
hai, use line maar… shayad pat jaye…”
Princi aur uska so called boyfriend meri baat sunkar confuse ho gaye the mujhpar
gussa kare ya kuch aur kare… unhe shayad samajh nahi aa raha tha ki main unki
tareef kar raha hoon ya burayi… kyunki maine apna samay aur energy bachane ke
liye ek sath ek hee samay me un dono ki tareef aur burayi sath me kar di thi… jiski
vazah se ab wo dono hee confuse ho gaye the aur office ke baaki staff bhi…
“ sala koyi level hee nahi hai, tum logo ka aur agli baar mujhse bhidne se pahle
soch lena warna, lawda yadi munda kharab hua toh pel-pal dunga… phhir faltu me
police case hoga, jiske baad main phhir se tumhe pelunga aur tab tak pelta
rahunga jab tak tumlog mera chooskar mujhse sorry nahi bologe, isliye…… ”
Maine matter wahi khatm kiya aur matter waha par wakayi me khatm bhi ho gaya
tha lekin pata nahi kisne jakar Vandana Rathi koi iski khabar de di ki meri mutth-
bhed…I mean muthbhed office ke dusare workers se hui hai… isliye VR ne taqriban
3 baje , yaani ki ladayi khatm hone ke ek ghante baad ladayi me shamil sabhi logo
ko apne cabin me bulaya….
232
Maine pahle-pahal toh socha ki Vandana mam mujhe cabin me bulakar pahle
thoda sa batti degi aur phhir pyar se apni sexy aadao se mujhe samjha-bujhakar
wapas bhej degi… maine Vandana mam ke cabin me sirf mere aur Vandana mam
ke hone ki aasha ki thi, isliye pant ki dahini jeb ke andar apna dahina hath dalkar
ahiste-ahiste lund sahlate hue main VR ke cabin ki taraf ravana hua lekin jab main
waha pahucha yani ki jab maine cabin me pravesh kiya toh dekha ki waha already
bahut bheed jama thi… waha Princi, uska boyfriend aur unke do-char wahi chutiye
sathi the…
“maine socha tha ki case close ho gaya…”un sabko waha dekhkar maine kaha
“ab aap sab yaha se jao… main Arman se baat kar lungi…”
Vandana mam ne chhote role wale kirdaro ko waha se bahar bheja aur mujhe apne
saamne wali chair me baithne ka ishara kiya…
“bolna shuru karo…”table par rakhi ek file ko uthakar Vandana Rathi boli aur
spectacle lagakar file me apni nazre gada li..
“mujhe do ghante aur chahiye , abki baar design kafi complex hai aur kyunki main
Gate ki preparation kar raha hoon, isliye main office ke baad koyi kaam nahi kar
sakta… par aaj ke kaam ko main yahi khatm kar dunga aur kal subah ek baar
check karke Yogi-jogi ko mail kar dunga aur uski ek copy aapko de dunga”
“tum mujhe bana rahe ho ya tumhe sach me koyi idea nahi hai ki maine tumhe
yaha kyun bulaya hai ?”file se apni nazar hatakar meri taraf dekhte hue Vandana
Rathi ne mujhe tana mara…
“mam main aapko ek story sunata hoon… mere dost kahte hai ki main bahut
achchhi story sunata hoon…”
“go on”
“okay… toh, ek shaks…. jise raato ko neend nahi aati , jiska sar har samay ghoomte
rahta hai, jo har samay is confusion me rahta hai aage use kya karna chahiye…
jiske paas aisa ek bhi zinda insaan nahi jis-se wo baat kar sake… wo apna kaam
puri imaandari se karta hai… toh ek din hota ye hai ki wo shaks jise do din se
neend nahi aayi thi wo computer ke saamne baithkar apna kaam kar raha tha. do
din se na sone ki vazah se uski aankhe jal rahi thi upar se computer ke screen ki
light ? lekin phhir bhi wo apne kaam me juta raha kyunki ye kaam use, usne diya
tha jiski wo bahut respect karta tha… infact wo apne boss ki itni jyada respect
karta tha ki unke name ke samne [size=”5”]R.[/size] lagane laga tha jaise ki
R.Vandana mam yani Respected Vandana mam… toh us din wo unhi R. mam ka
kaam kar raha tha… wo kayi ghanto se kaam kar raha tha, isliye uska gala bilkul
sookh chuka tha par wo pyas sahta chala gaya kyunki yadi wo uthkar paani peene
jaata toh uska flow bigad jata aur speed kam ho jati isliye usne apni pyas ko ignore
kiya… lekin pyas toh pyas hai , yadi use samay par bujhaya nahi gaya toh samay
ke sath wo kam nahi hoti balki aur badhti hai… aisich same uske sath bhi hua aur
uski pyas badhti gayi lekin wo phhir bhi sahta gaya, reason wahi… R.mam aur jab
uski pyas last stage me pahuchi yani ki jab paani peena ekdum anivarya ho gaya
toh usne office me kaam karne wale peon ko aawaz di ki wo idhar aaye… lekin usi
samay uski ek senior ne sirf apna raub jhadne ke liye us mehnati, imaandar aur
233
kaabil shaks ko jhad diya aur yaha tak ye bhi bola ki use kuch aata-jata nahi… ab
aapse mera ek sawal hai mam ki aap do raat se soyi nahi ho, aap apni bhookh-pyas
sah kar puri lagan aur imaandari se apna kaam kar rahi ho aur aapko koyi ek
glass paani ke peechhe bura-bhala bole toh aapka kya reaction hoga….? may
i”Rathi mam ki table par rakhe pani ke botal ki taraf ishara karte hue maine
puchha jispar unhone apna sar haan me hilakar sahmati di…[/b]
Maine pani ki botal uthayi aur gata-gat aadha botal gatak liya… Vandana mam ab
meri taraf dekh rahi thi… wo is samy thoda shocked thi ki koyi insaan bhala kaise
–aise baat kar sakta hai I mean koyi insaan bhala itna creative, itna talented, itna
smart, itna handsome kaise ho sakta hai… Vandana mam yadi meri boss nahi hoti
toh is samya wo zaroor daud kar mere paas aati aur apni gand mere taraf karke
bolti ki… “le Arman… mar de aaj is Rathi ki gand”
wo yadi meri boss nahi hoti toh zaroor wo apne kapde faadkar apna doodh mujhe
pilati ya phhir nangi hokar , apni taange failakar mujhe apni choot chatne ka
nyota deti… par us randi ne apne emotions ko achchhe se control kiya… usne aisa
kuch bhi nahi kiya aur na hee aisa kuch kaha…
“look around Arman , they all are waiting for my strict action against you… they
all hate you…”
“so do I…….. by the way, people have tendacy to hate awesome man… If they hate
you.let them hate...”
“let them hate…? Really…? why can’t you be normal like everyone else ? I mean
often you behave like…”
“like….”
“ like you are a curmudgeon…”
“curmudgeon…? matbal”
“a bad-tempered”
“you want me to be like them… behave like them…? Mam please , after seeing their
faces you know what I think… I think killing people should not be considered as an
illegal act..theyyyy…”
“kya hua…”
“pani ki botal…. pata nahi aaj khaaaaasi itni kyun aa rahi hai, shayad water
cooler ka thanda pani peene ka asar hai…”gata-gat do peg paani marne ke baad
maine kaha aur jab main botal wapas table par rakh raha tha tab mujhe ahsaas
hua ki abki baar toh maine botal me muh laga kar paani piya hai
“sorry mam, jaldbazi me dhyan nahi aaya..”
“no…no…no problem, its okay..”

234
“toh kaha the hum…”wapas table par pani ki botal ki taraf hath sarkate hue maine
puchha…
“ killing people should not be considered as an illegal act…”
“haan, inko dekho… ye sab subah uth-te hai, yaha kaam par aate hai, sham ko 5
baje ghar chale jate aur phhir sex karke so jate hai… kuch toh sex bhi nahi karte
honge aur kuch toh sex karne ke kaabil bhi nahi honge… mera matlab for god sake,
we are humans…. Not money or baby producing machines..Time is the most
powerful weapon of mankind and what are we doing ? nothing… we are wasting it
by doing 9 to 5 job…. I mean if you cant do something good then atleast do
something bad… something different, something notable… something remarkable”
“very deep thoughts, it’s…it’s nice… let’s do something special today…”muskurate

hue Vandana apna spectacle table par rakhte hue boli… “something special,
something notable, something eye catching….”
“what…”
“how about apologize to Princi ? it will be very special, will be notable as well as
remarkable… actually I have a offer for you…”
“iski maa ka prism… ye toh mujhse hee khel rahi hai, abhi pant kholkar lund dikha
duna toh yahi par moot degi… phhir wo hoga, something special, something
notable and eye-catching… R. kahi ki…”
“maine pahle hee kaha hai ki mujhe lip reading nahi aati…”
“ok. No problem.. let’s do this … but first let me know about the offer…”
“offer… offff…er… koyi offer nahi hai…”
“no offer , no sorry…”Vandana Rathi par apni pakad mazboot banate hue maine
kaha…
“ok, aaj raat ko dinner, mere ghar me…”
“dinner…..done…”
Aur is tarah zindagi me pahli baar Yugpurush a.k.a. Shri Arman a.k.a. 3.0 a.k.a. 4-
D man a.k.a. Arrogant Reputed Man ne na chahte hue bhi kisi ko sorry bola…jab
office se sabke jaane ke baad maine Princi ko sorry bola toh uska chehra dekhna
layak tha, wo us samay aise khush hui jaise kisi ne do-do lund uski choot me daal
diye ho…. uski khushi ka toh thikana hee nahi tha aur khushi-khushi me…. it’s
okay bolkar usne mujhe apne doodh se bhi laga liya… yahi hota hai jab koyi
Yugpurush kisi tuchchh manav ko sorry bolta hai toh…. Par hazar baat ki ek baat
ye hai ki maine sorry bola aur main chahe jitney bahane maar loon, chahe khud ko
jitna bhi justify karu, sach toh yahi tha ki maine sorry bola… wo bhi ek ladki ko.
Wo bhi jisne 59 logo ke saamne meri insult ki thi…
.

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Main jab bhi apne dosto ko ya phhir apne dushmano ko apne sahas ke kisse sunata
hoon toh main aksar Police station ke us case ke baare me zaroor baat karta hoon
jisme maine superintendent of police ke saamne Collector ke bete ki chhati me laat
mari thi wo bhi police station me…. meri nazar me wo meri zindagi ka sabse
zokhim bhara stunt tha… halaki uske pahle aur phhir uske baad me policewalo ne
bhi mere sath stunt kiya tha… par wo collector ke bete ke chhati par laat marne ka
jo moment tha na wo kamal ka tha… use soch kar main aaj bhi thrill ho jata hoon
aur dil karta hai ki Ganga-Jamuna jakar Daddu ke saamne Ajmeri bai ko chodu…
par phhir…. Anyway leave it.
.
Sharda Entereprises me apna pahla din bitakar main auto se wapas aa raha tha…
waise is samay sham ki 5:30 ya 6 bajne chahiye par jab maine ghadi me time dekha
toh paya ki 8 baj rahe the… mujhe pata nahi ye kaise hua I mean main 5 baje
Sharda Enterprises se chhutne ke baad 3 ghante maine kya kiya, mujhe kuch yaad
nahi… mujhe toh bas itna yaad hai ki maine Princi ko sorry bola aur Collector ke
launde ko marne wale incident ke baare me sochte hue main Sharda Enterprises se
bahar nikla tha aur jab main apne ateet se wapas vartman me aaya tab raat ke 8
baj chuke the aur main sadak me bad-hawasi ki halat me chale jaa raha tha jiske
baad River View Colony ke liye maine ek auto book kiya…. Ye thik aise hee tha jaise
kisi ne ghadi me time aage badhaya ho aur time sachmuch me aage badh gaya….
.
“what a concentration, man…I love it…”
“maza aaya na, abey ye toh kuch bhi nahi… ek baar toh raat se lekar subah tak
main ghadi ki sui ko ginta raha aur jab mera concentration toota tab subah ho
chuki thi… chal bol papa…”
“2.0 was better…”
“le… 2.0 better hota toh wo 3.0 me update hee kyun hota, tu 1.0 se better tha par
main best hoon…”
“aaj office me maine dekh liya ki tu kitna best hai…”
“abey teri tarah chutiya nahi hoon main, main dimag se khelta hoon aur dimag se
pelta hoon… yaha tak ki dimag se sex bhi kar leta hoon aur yadi chahu toh abhich
bina lund chhuye dimag se mutth bhi mar sakta hoon”
“chal be, 8th semester ke baad tune sirf ek mardo wala kaam kiya hai… wo bhi
David ko marne ka… usme bhi main tere sath tha… sath kya, darasal us kaam ko
bhi maine hee anjaam diya tha, warna tu aise hee aand latkaye zindagi bhar David
aur Varun ki ji-huzoori karte rahta…”
“bol toh aise raha hai jaise, NH-6 me roj tu hee kand karta hai… sale aaj tak kabhi
gun dekhi bhi hai ? yaha main smuggling kar raha hoon guns ki… Sau guns ka
order diyela hai maine daddu ko…sau guns ka”
“aur wahi guns Daddu ek-ek karke tere gand me dalega… phhir mat bolna ki… 2.0
bacha le mujhe…”
“chal be, tere jaise old version ke muh nahi lagta main…”
236
“tu chal be…”
“abey tu chal be…”
Chapter-23: Rocket of Vengeance
“chal jaa na…”
“sala old version…”
“dekh chup ho ja, warna abhi auto se kood jaunga…”
“baap ka raaj hai kya…”
“nahi raaj toh The Ron ka hai…….lol…”

.
“bhai, ye aap kya kar rahe ho ? aur baat kis-se kar rahe ho…”sadak ke kinare auto
rok-kar auto wale ne mujhse puchha…
Aksar jab mere andar mauzood meri dono antaratmaye aapas me baat ya bahas
karti hai toh sab silent mode me hota hai jis-se saamne wale ko kuch nahi pata
chalta lekin aaj pata nahi kaise humara volume tej ho gaya tha… jiska aabhas
mujhe autowale ne karaya….
“dude, this is the psychological thing, you won’t understand….”
“main kuch samjha nahi…”
“dekha, maine pahle hee bola tha ki tu nahi samjhega… ha..ha..ha.. you poor
people, tu dimag mat chala, auto chala…”
.
River View Colony se thodi door maine auto rukwaya aur jaise hee autowale ne
auto roka main turant auto me se koodkar bina paise diye waha se bhaga…. NH-6
me bhagte hue maine peechhe palat kar dekha, wo autowala bhi apna auto
chhodkar mere peechhe bhag raha tha aur bhagta bhi kyun na… use 700 dene ka
maine vaada jo kiya tha… sale , chodu samajh ke rakhe hai public ko… mana ki
NH-6 ki badaulat main aaj-kal kafi rahis hoon lekin aise free me thodi paisa
batunga… jab ye bhosdiwale mere se itna paisa le rahe hai toh phhir aam-aadmi ki
toh gand hee maar lete honge… sabko…sabko ek-ek karke line me launga.
Auto se koodkar bhagte hue maine socha tha ki thodi door tak mera peechha karne
ke baad wo autowala wapas laut jayega, lekin wo BC peechhe hatne ka naae hee
nahi le raha tha… bhagte-bhagte uska kaleja muh ko aa gaya tha…lekin wo phhir
bhi apna kaleja muh me liye mere peechhe daude ja raha tha…
“abey chutiye, 700 ke peechhe mat bhag, kahi koyi tera auto lekar udd gaya toh…
chus lena phhir…”bhagte hue main ruka aur mudkar mere peechhe bhag rahe

237
autowale se bola… jise sunkar wo autowala ruka aur phhir thodi der wahi khada
kuch sochta raha….
“kutra…nahi toh. tu dobara milna kabhi mujhe… saat sau ka saat hazar na
wasoola toh kahna… dukkar,sala”itna bolkar wo autowala wapas laut gaya aur
main phhir bade aaram se apne flat tak aaya….
“maza aa gaya aaj toh, dekha be 2.0… tune kabhi aisa kuch kiya tha kya”
“aise chhote kaam main nahi karta…”
Room ke andar jakar maine apne wo kapde nikale jinhe pahankar main Vandana
Rathi ke ghar dinner par jaane wala tha.. maine apne shoes bhi polish kiye aur ant
me perfume dhoondane laga… par mere paas toh perfme tha hee nahi. pichhale ek-
dedh saal se toh main Varun ka perfume use kar raha tha…. uske baad na toh kabhi
zaroorat padi aur na hee mujhe kabhi yaad aaya…. Anyway, maine shower lene ka
socha aur towel lekar bathroom me ghusa… wo bhi itni thandi me, wo bhi ek ladki
ke liye… is tarah main aaj back to back do baar apni hee nazar me gir gaya tha…
main kafi der tak chuppi saadhe apni aankh band karke bathroom ke bahar khada
raha aur phhir jo do paap maine aaj kiye hai, unko dhone ke liye bathroom ka
darwaja khola….
“abey, bhosad…. Ye toh main gate hai… band kar lawda, itni thandi-thandi hawa
aa rahi hai…”
“sorry…”main gate band karke maine us gate ko khola jisar maine BTR likha hua
tha aur bathroom ke andar jakar gate lock karne laga…
“par main bathroom ka darwaja andar se kyun lock kar raha hoon, yaha toh main
akele rahta hoon… yaad aaya… Aradhna… good strategy… par yadi usko andar
aana hee hoga toh wo darwaja knock thodi karegi…. wo toh direct yahi prakat ho
jayegi….”
Mujhe shower lena bahut pasand hai bole toh mere pasandida chizo me se ek hai
aur Shower ke neeche bheegte hue zindagi ke baare me sochane ka toh maza hee
kuch aur hai, khas-kar ki ye sochna ki life me mujhe aage kya karna chahiye. Yahi
wo jagah hai jaha mere andar ki creativity bahar aati hai… yahi mere plans bante
hai aur yahi wo jagah hai jaha main full 100 % serious rahta hoon… 100 % nahi, 99
%... 100 % toh physics ke khilaf hai aur main aisa koyi bhi kaam nahi karta jo
physics ke khilaf ho…
shower ke neeche soch-vichar karne ki meri ye aadat bahut purani hai, ye mere
bachpan ki un gini chuni aadato me se hai jo mere college tak ka padav aar kar
gayi aur ab tak barkarar hai…. maine yun shower ke neeche sochne-vicharne ka
kaam college me bhi bahut kiya tha…par usme thoda fark tha , us samay main
apne future ke baare me nahi balki Esha ke baare me socha karta tha… maine apne
char saal shower ke neeche Esha ke baare me sochne me vyateet kiya lekin phhir
bhi..…anyway,

238
mujhe nahi lagta ki is-se badi nakamyabi aur jillat ki baat mere liye koyi aur ho
sakti hai… par abhi main apne future ke baare me soch raha tha yani ki Vandana
Rathi ke baare me, jo is waqt apne ghar me khade hokar ya phhir gand ke bal
baithe hue mere liye lunch taiyar kar rahi hogi…
“lunch nahi…dinner…”
“dinner ? raat ho gayi kya…”
“raat hee toh hai be…”
“oh.k… sala aise bhi koyi confuse hota hai kya…”

.
Iske baad maine decide kiya ki ab main kuch aur nahi sochunga, warna jitna
sochunga utna hee confuse hota jaunga…
“ye kya tha… chod behan…. aisa laga jaise kisi ne mere kandhe me koyi nukili chiz
ghop di ho….”maine apne kandhe par hath fera toh paya ki mere kandhe me ek pin
jo 3-4 inch lambi hogi wo aadhi ghusi hui thi… pin kafi patli, magar lambi thi… jo
shayad shower ke paani ke jariye hee aaya tha… sala
Maine apne kandhe se wo pin nikali , mere kandhe me jaha wo pin ghusi thi waha
se ab halka-halka khoon nikal raha tha… maine ispar jyada dhyan nahi diya aur
phhir se shower ke maje lene laga… lekin thodi der baad mere dusare kandhe me
phhir se waisa hee dard hua, jaisa pahli baar hua tha… is baar dard ki intensity
thodi jyada thi…
“abki baar char pins… colony ke secratery se complain karni padegi…”un charo
lambi pins ko nikal kar neeche fekte hue maine kaha…. “acha hua lund me nahi
laga, warna… dahine hath ka exercise kuch din ke liye rook jata…”
Lekin uske baad toh jaise iska silsila hee shru ho gaya…har minute-do minute me
shower ke through mere sharir me pins ghus rahi thi aur main tha ki shower ke
neeche se hatne ka naam hee nahi le raha tha… dheere-dheere shower ke paani me
lambi, nukili pins ki sankhya badhti gayi aur usi ke sath mere shari ke zakhm bhi…
par main showerke neeche se nahi hata…. Mere sharir ke kayi hisso se khoon ki
dharaye chalni shuru ho gayi… lekin main wahi mazbooti se data raha . maine
gaur kiya ki jaise-jaise samay beet raha tha…waise-waise paani ki matra kam hoti
ja rahi thi aur pani ki jagah pin baras rahe the… mujhe tabhi samajh jaana
chahiye tha ki ye kya ho raha hai, par us samay jaise mere dimag ne kaam karna
band kar diya tha ya phhir main ye kahu ki is samay mera dimag itna jyada kaam
kar raha tha ki mujhe kuch aur sochane ki zaroorat hee nahi thi… na toh mujhe
apne dard ki parvaah thi aur na hee apne khoobsurat chehre ka nukili pins ke
jariye bigadne ka koyi gham tha…. shower se dheere-dheere paani kam hota gaya
aur phhir ek samay aisa aaya , jab shower se paani ki jagah tez aawaz ke sath puri
tarah lambi-lambi pin barasne lagi… main har pal, har seconds un pins ko apne
sharir me chubhte hue dekh raha tha. mere pure sharir me pins ghusi hui thi aur
dheere-dheere mere sharir se khoon ris raha tha… main kaafi der tak aise khada
khud ko dekhta raha aur phhir ek waqt aisa aaya jab mera khada rahna bhi
mushqil ho gaya….

239
Mere pair mere sharir ka vazan nahi utha pa rahe the aur pure sharir se khoon
bahne ke karan mera sharir neela padne laga tha… thodi hee der me mujhe mere
dil ki dhadkane sunayi dene lagi, jo ki dheere-dheere… dheeli pad rahi thi…. aur
phhir mere dil ki dhadkane band ho gayi aur isi ke sath meri aankhe bhi….. par
main mara nahi tha, main ab bhi soch sakta tha… main kalpanaye kar sakta tha…
main ab bhi Vandana Rathi ke bade-bade doodh imagine kar sakta tha…
“Arman bahar nikal… mom ise bolo na ki bahar nikle, kab se andar ghusa hua
hai…”mere kaano me ye aawaz padi, jise sunkar main turant jaan gaya ki main
kaha hoon….
“itna dard… abhi tak aisa lag raha hai jaise pins chubhi hui hai…”shower band
karne ke baad apne pure sharir ko dekhkar main badbadaya….
.
Bathroom se bahar aakar main taiyar hone laga… par kisliye ? mujhe toh is waqt
ye bhi nahi maloom ki main yaha kitne baje tapka hoon… lekin phhir bhi main
taiyar hua aur taiyar hokar Maa ke paas gaya… ek toh mujhe aajtak ye samajh
nahi aaya ki moms aksar kitchen me kyun hoti hai… din-bhar kitchen me kuch na
kuch khutur-putur karte rahti hai… main kitchen me apni maa ke paas gaya aur
bola…
“hey, beautiful lady…come here”
Par meri maa ne mujhe completely ignore mar diya , jiske baad apni insult ko
cover karte hue maine kaha ki “mom, kya aapko pata hai ki main shower lene ke
baad kaha jaane wala tha…?”
“tuition jayega aur kaha jayega… khelne gaya toh taange tod dungi, pata nahi
basketball khelne ka kya naya junoon sawar hua hai… pure ghar ko basketball
court bana rakha hai... wo bucket jo tune deewar par taang kar rakha hai use nikal
de warna mujhse bura koyi nahi hoga…”
“ kya mom, ab main ek yugpurush hoon…”
Main kitchen se bahar nikla aur apne room ki deewar me dekha, jaha maine plastic
ki bucket ka surface kaatkar deewar se taang diya tha aur usme basketball dalne
ki practice kiya karta tha… maine basketball uthaya aur bucket me basket karke
tuition ke liye nikal gaya…..
.
Kitna achchha lagta hai apne bachpan ko dobara jeekar…. Jaha meri maa
thi…mera bada bhai tha, ek rahis baap tha aur mera ek alag room… jaha main jab
chahu mutth maar sakta tha… jaha tarah-tarah ki suvidhaye bhi thi…. kayi logo ko
toh iska 1 % bhi naseeb nahi hota aur main aksar bhagwan se complain karte rahta
hoon ki usne mera sath nahi diya…. Par meri zindagi me ek chiz ki hamesha se
kami thi wo thi dream ki…ek goal ki… mera koyi sapna nahi tha, mera koyi aim
nahi tha ki main zindagi me kya banna chahta hoon…. School me sochta tha ki
scientist banunga , phhir socha ki indian ambassy , phhir collector, phhir
superintendent of police aur phhir jab kuch wahiyat movie dekhi toh socha ki inse
achchhi movie toh main bana sakta hoon…isliye kuch mahine mere dimag me
Movie director banne ka bhi chuluk sawar raha… main aksar logo ko dekhta aur
240
unhe apni movie me role de deta… par main apni movie me kabhi koyi lead role
nahi le paya... kyunki mujhe ek aise kirdar ki zaroorat thi, jo mujhse bhi ek kadam
aage ho par sala aisa koyi mila hee nahi… isliye maine movie banana ka plan drop
kar diya… par sach toh ye tha ki main inme se kuch nahi ban paya,isliye nahi
kyunki mere andar talent nahi tha balki isliye kyunki maine kabh koshish hee nahi
ki, actually jo main kahna chahta hoon wo ye ki insaan ke andar chahe kitna bhi
talent kyun na ho yadi wo koshish nahi karega toh jhat ka ek baal bhi nahi ukhad
payega…. Par is waqt main koshish kar raha tha…. is waqt main apne physics
teacher Amarnath Shukla ji ke yaha tuition padhne aaya hua tha aur Rocket
propulsion ka ek numerical solve kar raha tha…..
“kyun be tera rocket uda ya nahi….”mujhe kafi der tak ek question me joojhate
dekh Varun ne haste hue puchha….
“udega…udega. Gravity thoda problem create kar raha hai…”
“chhod na, waise bhi ye question exam me nahi aane wala, yadi aaya toh main
apni moochhe katwa lunga…”
“teri moochhe hee kaha hai”
“jab aayegi, tab katwa lunga… chal chhod na.. T.V. dekh power rangers aa raha
hai, Amaru sir abhi andar apna pet bhar rahe hai tab tak ek-do episode dekh
le…warna phhir baad me mujhse puchhega ki kya hua…”waha mauzood dusare
laundo ki taraf dekh kar Varun bola “puchhega so puchhega… wo main bata dunga
, lekin ye lawda bolta hai ki main action karke ise dikhau ki kaise hero ne villain ko
mara aur phhir ant-shant jagah se mujhe kudwata rahta hai….”
“kitna cute hoon na main, chal ab question solve karne de…. Mujhe bada hokar
scientist banna hai… waise Gravity se mujhe yaad aaya ki main kal kuch soch raha
tha….”
“maar sale ko…maar, maa chod de us bahan ke lawde ki…. “T.V. me apni nazar
gadaye hue Varun ne puchha “kya soch raha tha ? zaroor Shweta ke baare me soch
raha hoga…use pata kyu nahi leta, itna toh line deti hai…ab kya tere saamne nude
hokar wo aaye tabhi tu use wo 3 magical words bolega”
“nahi be, Shweta ke baare me nahi soch raha tha… main darasal apne baare me
soch raha tha… ab dekh…School ka sabse handsome launda kaun…?”
“kaun..”
“abey main… aur kaun… School ka sabse smart aur intelligent launda kaun…?
phhir se main… School me aisa kaun hai jo sports me school ka name roshan karta
hai…? jawab hai…main. Pure school ka topper kaun…? main. Last year swami
Vivekanand ke anniversary me inter-school quiz contest kaun jeeta tha…? main…
School ke functions me function ki shaan kaun badhata hai…main ? School me
sabse jyaa Physics kis-se banti hai…? ek baar phhir se….main…main… main. Main
hoon… main hee hoon, sirf main hee hoon…. kaha main aur kaha tum sab…salo
mujhe dekhkar tumlog ko sharam nahi aati kya…? Aaj se aap kahkar baat kiya
karo mujhse… gandi naali ke keede-makodo… ma-baap ne tum logo ko kuch
sikhaya-nahi hai kya… chutiyo”dahadte hue maine kaha
241
“tu kahna kya chahta hai be…”
“oh,sorry… wo toh main bhool hee gaya… darasal main kahna ye chahta hoon ki
School me mera wahi role hai, jo Physics me Gravity ka hai…”
“hmm… is hisab se dekha jaye toh phhir tere papa toh Newton hue… hai na ? ”
“sale, Arman se Mazak karta hai…”
“chup kar aur chup-chap apna rocket uda… mujhe Power Rangers dekhne de….
bada aaya… main…main…main, sala ATMAKAMI”
.
Aur maine aisa hee kiya , maine Varun ki baat maan li aur apna rocket udane me
busy ho gaya… abki baar mera rocket uda aur seedhe chaand me pahucha…. i
mean question tha ki Moon me pahuchne ke liye rocket ko kitna samay lagega…
Amarnath Shukla sir, jo ki school me humare Physics teacher the aur jinke yaha
hum physics ki coaching karne jaate the wo andar apna pet bhar rahe the aur
mujhe chhodkar baaki launde T.V. dekh rahe the… infact Amaru sir ne khud kaha
tha ki jab tak wo aate hai, hum log t.v. dekhe… normally is situation me teachers
apne students ko revision marne ke liye kahte hai… lekin humare Physics teacher
ki toh baat hee nirali thi aur yahi wazah thi ki hum unke yaha padhne jaya karte
the…. Lekin meri nazar t.v. par nahi thi kyunki us samay toh mujhe scientist banne
ka bukhar chadha hua tha….
“ye…ye kya dekh raha rahe ho tum log….”Dakar marte hue andar se bahar wale
room me aate hue Shukla ji ne puchha…
“kuch nahi sir, bas aise…hee”
“is-se achchha toh bf dekh lete yar… CDs wahi t.v. ke upar padi hai… kya bakchod
ho yar…”
“wo sir, dhyan nahi diya… warna bf hee dekhte aur phhir aapki biwi ko chodte
”Shukla ji ki baat sunkar maine kaha…………..mann me.
.
Toh is tarah Shukla ji se mujhe khali samay me bf dekhne prerna mili aur humari
aaj ki class shuru hui. Shukla ji bade moodie aadmi the aur full josh me physics
padhate the aur jab physics padhate-padhate wo jhad jate I mean thak jate tab wo
apni ek-do story humse share karne lagte aur abhi bhi waisa ho raha tha…. book
ke jis rocket ko maine thodi der pahle udakar chaand par pahuchaya tha, usi
rocket ko Shukla ji bhi udane ki koshish kar rahe the… par unka rocket udna toh
door hil bhi nahi raha tha, jiske baad maine sir ko free falling ka concept diya aur
unke rocket ko bhi chandrama me land karwaya… woooh… mujhe toh astronaut
hona chahiye tha, phhir main bhi Interstellar movie ki tarah black hole me
ghusta… anyway…
.

242
“bahut hard question tha yar, well done Arman… waise rocket ke udne se mujhe
yaad aaya ki ek baar main bhi flight me udkar apne mauseri didi ke paas gaya
tha….”
“lijiye chay…”Sir ko beech me hee disturb karke unki wife boli aur chay dene ke
liye thoda neeche jhuki….
“abey Varun, Shukla ji ki biwi ka pond dekh ke bata toh ki… kitna bada hai… jhuki
hui hai toh mast clear dikhega… ye bade-bade pond.. beech me vertically darar…
mann karta hai, chipak jaun”khush-fusate hue maine Varun se kaha aur Varun ne
apni gardan tedhi karke angdayi lene ke bahane Shukla ji ki biwi ka pond dekha
“bahut bada hai be…”
“aahhhhh…uske pond me ek laat maar na, maza aayega”
“bhag bhosdike…”
“uske pond me kiss karna…”
“pond-chatta…”
Shukla ji ki biwi ne jhuk-kar Shukla ji ko chay di aur wahi khadi rahi kyunki last
time Shukla ji ne chay peene ke baad cup, hume parabolic curve samjhane ke liye
fek diya tha…
“toh kaha tha main…”chay peete hue Shukla ji ne puchha…
“sir… aap, udkar apni mauseri didi ke paas gaye the…”
“haan, kya batau tum logo ko… main apni didi ke paas salo baad gaya tha aur
shuru me toh main unhe pahchan bhi nahi paya tha…. tum logo ko pata hai , unke
itne bade-bade doodh the… ye itne bade-bade dooddha”apne hath se apni mauseri
didi ke doodh ka size batate hue Sir ne kaha… jo ki humare liye kafi awkward
situion thi… aur wo bhi tab jab Mrs. Amarnath waha mauzood ho .
hum sab bahut jor-jor se hasna chahte the… lekin Shukla ji ki biwi ke waha hone ke
karan hum logo ne apni hasi daba rakhi thi, maine Shukla ji ki biwi ko dekha…wo
bhi is samay awkward situation me thi par isko chhipane ke liye wo mand-mand
muskurane lagi thi… hum sab apni hasi dabaye baithe hue the… kuch ko toh itni
hasi aa rahi thi ki hasi dabane ke chakkar me unhe buri tarah khasi aane lagi aur
tab maine socha ki, BC ye toh past hai… kya ukhad legi Shukla ki biwi.. aur main
dahad mar-markar hasne laga…jis-se baki log jo abhi tak apni hasi daba ke rakhe
hue the…wo bhi hasne lage…. Humara is tarah hasna Shukla ji ki biwi ko kuch
khas pasand nahi aaya tha aur isme char chand lagate hue maine apna hath unki
taraf kiya aur unhe ishare kar-kar ke hasne laga, jis-se wo serious ho gayi… lekin
mujhe maloom tha ki Shukla ji ke hote hue wo mere jhat ka ek baal bhi nahi ukhad
sakti….

243
Toh is tarah intentionally aur unintentionally, jo bhi kah lo… maine Shukla ji ki
biwi ki pel ke insult ki aur us din mere bheje me ek baat ghusi ki yaadi aapke paas
ekka, badshah hai toh phhir nahle, dahle se nahi darna chahiye…. Us din sirf itna
hee kaand nahi hua, us din tution me ek aur kaand hua tha jo ki Shukla ji ki biwi ko
bahut bura laga tha… hua darasal ye tha ki Shukla ji ka wo barbaad launda jisne
bus-stand me apne se kayi saal badi ladki ko propose mara tha… uske propose ki
khabar Shukla ji ko kisi ne phone par de…de thi aur jab sham ko unka ladka bahar
gand marwa kar wapas ghar aaya toh unhone use pyar se puchkar kar apne paas
bulaya aur uske baal sahlakar apne seene se lagate hue bade pyar se bole….
“humara chhutku na, jis claas me padhta hai… us-se ek class aage ki meaning yaad
karke rakha hua hai… kitna hoshiyar hai… humara chhutku… …….. madarchod
nahi toh…”apne bête ke sar ka baal kheechkar uske gaal par back to back jordar
thappad marte hue Shukla ji ne kaha… “madarchod, bhosdiwale… aaj raat ko main
tujhse meaning puchhunga aur yadi wo yaad nahi hui na toh tere gand me danda
daalkar pure mohalle me nanga ghumaunga…sale, harami… padhna likhna toh
kuch hai nahi… ladkiyo ko chhedta hai…”
.
Shukla ji achanak se itne hyper ho gaye the ki wo apne bete ko lagatar marte jaa
rahe the aur main waha dusari taraf baitha ye gin raha tha ki wo kitna thappad
kha chukka hai….
“30…31…32….33….wow… aaj toh full entertain kar diya Shukla ji ne, 38…39…40..
common shukla ji…century maar do aaj, chahe toh tea-break le lo…”
“heee… heeee”hum logo ki taraf dekh kar Shukla ji bole “heee , tumlog bhi maro is
harami ko… maa chod dalo iski….”
Lekin hum log shant baithe rahe, bhala hum log kaise Shukla ji ke bete ko maar
sakte the… isliye hum log apni-apni jagah par shant baithe rahe…. jis-se abki baar
khisiya kar Shukla ji ne humse kaha…
“kamal hai yar, iska baap bol raha hai phhir bhi nahi maar rahe ho… arey maro, is
harami ko…. Kaise shant baithe ho tum sab, bakchod-vakchod ho ka…”
Aur phhir main apni jagah se utha aur Shukla ji ke launde ka baal pakd kar use
apni taraf kheecha aur ek laat kaskar uske pichhwade me di, jis-se wo girte hue
andar wale room me gira… main bhi andar wale room me gaya…jaha uski maa
yani ki Shukla ji ki biwi apne aankho me aansu liye ek kinare baithkar subak rahi
thi… maine Shukla ji ki biwi ke saamne uske bete ko laat se marna shuru kar diya
aur kayi tariko se uchak-uchak kar style se mara… Shukla ji ki biwi ke saamne
main bahut der tak uske bete ko laat se, hath se , kohni se aur ghutno se pelta raha
aur phhir jab marte-marte thak gaya toh Shukla ji ki biwi ke paas gaya aur bola….
“tujhe yaad hai, kuch din pahle… jab main tere yaha T.V. par power rangers dekh
raha tha toh tune role me t.v. band kar diya tha aur mujhe, specially mujhe
chamkaya tha ki yaha aate ho toh sirf padhai par dhyan diya karo…. Remember…
bas usi ka badla hai ye….ab se apni aukat me rahna warna next time tere bete ko
nahi tujhe marwaunga ….Got it, now get lost…. You, ugly bitch”

244
Mujhe nahi pata par kya kisi ne gaur kiya ki maine beech me ek sentence add kiya
tha ki kisi ne Amarnath sir ko phone karke uske bete ki kartoot batayi thi…
actually wo main hee tha, jisne Amarnath sir ko phone kiya tha… pahli vazah ye ki
Amarnath sir ke launde ne jis laundi ko chheda tha, wo koyi aur nahi balki meri
school life crush thi aur dusari vazah ye ki mujhe Amarnath sir ki biwi se apna
hisaab chukana tha… is tarah main phone ke through ek teer chalaya aur un dono
ka shikar kar liya….
.
Tuition ke baad main apne ghar aaya aur apne time travel ke baare me gahan
chintan me doob gaya… maine kafi dimag lagaya , ghanto dimag lagaya…ji-se
mujhe ek baat jo ye pata chali ki main jaise past me enter hota hoon waisich yaha
se exit bhi hota hoon… phhir chahe school Bus ke through aana-jana ho ya phhir
relative motion ke through… har baar aisich hee hota hai…
“yani ki yaha se jaate waqt mujhe phhir se un pins ke chubhne ka dard sahna
padega… oh my physics … anyway, let’s do it…mere yaha aane me koyi control
nahi hai lekin yaha se jaane me toh hona chahiye….”
Chapter-24: Ambiguously Unambiguous
Main apne room se bahar aaya aur raat ke 10 baje kadake ki thand me bathroom
ke andar ghusa aur shower chalu kiya…. Aadhe ghante tak shower ke neeche
kanpte rahne ke baad bhi mere sharir me ek bhi pins aakar nahi lagi
“lagta hai ye experiment fail ho gaya…haaaau… gand fat gayi re, itni thand me….
hooooooo….. haaaaa… aao na behanchodo, kiski gand me ghuse ho…. ”
Aur jab thodi aur der tak mera plan kamyab nahi hua toh main shower ke neeche
se hata aur apne sharir ki taraf dekh kar bola….
“hat madarchod… chutiya samajh rakha hai kya…”
Aur tabhi meri nazar mere dahine kandhe par padi jaha ek lambi, nukili keel mere
kandhe me ghusi hui thi aur waha se khoon ris raha tha… jise dekhkar main khus
bhi hua aur chauka bhi… kyunki abki baar pins ki size double thi. shower ki taraf
dekhkar main shower ke neeche aaya, itne me ek keel shower ke paani ke sath aayi
aur seedhe mere dahine aankh me ghusi…..
“iski toh….dhatt”apni aankh se keel nikal kar maine kaha par keel ke sath-sath
mere aankh ke kuch bhag bhi nikal aaye the… maine bathroom me lage mirror me
khud ko dekha… meri aankh ke beecho-beech gahra chhed ho chuka tha aur waha
se khoon bhi nikal raha tha.
iske baad jo silsila chalu hua, wo chalta hee raha… bole toh mera pura sharir keelo
se chhalli ho gaya... mera sharir dheere-dheere kamzor pad raha tha aur pahle ki
tarah is baar bhi mujhe mere dil ki dhadkane sunayi dene lagi… tabhi bathroom ke
gate me kisi ne dastak di….
“Arman tu…. Naha raha hai ? is waqt…. Tera dimag toh sahi hai na…. mom-dad…
dekho Arman raat ke 10 baje naha raha hai…”
maine bathroom ka darwaja khola aur bheegte hue Vipin bhaiya ko middle finger
dikhakar bola “chusega kya…” aur phhir unhe dekhte hee dekhte mere ankho ke
245
samne ek pal me scene aise change hua…jaise bathroom… bathroom nahi balki lift
ho aur satak se upar wale floor me pahucha diya ho…mera matlab Vipin bhaiya ko
jab maine wo do magical word “chusega kya..” bola tab uske baad mujhe kuch nahi
dikha, maine apni palke jhapkayi aur jab aankh khola toh vartman me tha…maine
apne pure sharir ko dekha, kahi koyi nishan nahi tha…
“delusions….”explain it
“kisi doctor ke paas kyun nahi jata…”
“you mean psychiatrist…”
“jo bhi bolte ho…”
“main psychiatrist ke paas jaunga toh meri izzat down nahi ho jayegi aur waise
bhi kua pyase ke paas aata hai, pyasa kue ke paas nahi jata... I accept ki mujhe
koyi serious bimari hai …lekin mujhe is-se problem nahi hai… jise problem ho wo
ilaaz karwaye…. Mera kya hai, main 4-D man hoon, jaha kuch galat hua toh time
reset maar dunga”
Mujhe pichhale kuch dino se ek ajeeb hee adat lag gayi thi aur wo thi har jagah suit
pahan kar jaane ki… phhir chahe main dus kadam door cigarette lene hee kyun na
gaya hoon… yaha tak ki apne chhat se Vandana Rathi ke chhat par maine jump bhi
suit pahan kar mara tha… yaha tak ki NH-6 me loot bhi. maine aaine ke saamne
aakar ek cigarette jalayi aur dhua chhodte hue khud ko aaine me dekhne laga…
mere gaal thode pichak gaye the aur meri aankho ke neeche kali jharriya bhi
padne lagi thi… honth bhi pahle ki tulna me kafi kale ho gaye the ,jispar se mere
chehre me kayi jagah kate-fate nishan mere chehre ki sundarta me char-chand
laga rahe the…. Par ek chiz mujhe jo bahut pasand aayi wo ye ki meri ye halat suit
me kafi jach rahi thi…. bole toh apun ko is waqt full criminal wali feeling aa rahi
thi… maine aaine me hee deewar me tangi ghadi ko dekha aur khud par chillaya…
“abey 10 baj rahe hai, ladkiyo ki tarah taiyar hona band kar…kaun sa Vandana
Rathi tujhe choot de degi…”
“nahi degi toh phhir rape hoga… waise bhi sirf yahi bura kaam bach gaya hai meri
zindagi me karne ko…”
“chal phhir aaj ho hee jaye…”
“pakka…”
“aur nahi toh kya… waise bhi mujhe kya parwah…mujhe toh bas kand karna hai…
jhelna toh tujhe padega,jab wo tere khilaf rape ka case thokegi…”
“itna bakchod dikhta hoon kya main… jo rape karne ke baad zinda chhod dunga.
ye gun maine photo khichkar facebook..whatsapp me d.p. dalne ke liye nahi liya
hai… ek goli choot me aur ek goli gaand me…total do goli marunga… do taraf se
marunga…wo bhi pata hai kaise…”
“kaise…”

246
“gun ki nali uske choot aur gand ke andar dalne ke baad gun upar ki oor ghuma
dunga… zara soch ke dekh toh wo scene…”
“chal na…ab…”
Aur is tarah main 10:30 baje mere aur VR ke flat ki jo jhat barabar common
boundary wall thi use koodkar Vandana Rathi ke flat ke garden me pahucha... par
jab maine Vandana Rathi ke flat par nazar dali toh paya ki uske pure flat ki light
band thi…
“kahi, isne mujhe chodu toh nahi bana diya…? Ki khud dinner karne bahar gayi
hogi aur main yaha bhookha maru… nahi, car toh iski yahi hai…wo bhi ek nahi do-
do… ye dusari car kiski hai… yaad aaya… ye toh wahi car hai jo us din Vandana
Rathi ke ghar ke bahar khadi thi jis din wo do police wale aaye the…kya name tha
un thullo ka… ek ka Shriwas aur ek ka Shivaprasad…. huh.bakwas name… par
R.Rathi ne apne ghar ki battiya kyun band rakhi hai…? zaroor candle night dinner
ka programme rakha hoga… kahi mujhe ye shadi ke liye propose toh nahi marne
wali…? Wow, I’m so excited…anyway sabse pahle Vandana Rathi ke car ka tyre
puncture karta hoon…yesss…”
Aur aisa karne ke baad maine R.Rathi ke darwaje par dastak di… ek baar nahi do
baar nahi…pure barah baar lekin Vandana mam ne darwaja nahi khola…
mujhe waha se wapas chale jana chahiye tha… kyunki ho sakta hai ki Vandana
mam ne mujhse office me aise hee kah diya ho aur phhir bhool gayi ho ya phhir
kafi der tak mera intezaar ki ho aur jab main nahi aaya toh khana khakar so gayi
ho… ye common sense ki baat thi, mujhe samajhna chahiye tha aur waha se chale
jana chahiye tha… lekin maine aisa nahi kiya… main waha se nahi gaya aur
Vandana Rathi ki darwaja kafi der tak jor-jor se khatkhata raha…
“aise kaise so jayegi, lawda… kab tak darwaja nahi kholegi… mere paas puri raat
hai…puri raat. puri raat iska darwaja khatkhatata rahunga aur phhir aakhir me
tod dunga… iske baap ka bhosda… mazak bana rakha hai… AR-Man ka”ye bolkar
maine jor se terahvi bar bhi darwaja khatkhataya aur jab is baar bhi andar se koyi
response nahi aaya toh… maine uchak kar darwaje me ek laat mari aur is baar
darwaje aawaz itni jor se hui ki main khud dar gaya…
“teri maa ka lund, tere baap ka bhosda… Randi Rathi…” bolkar maine ek aur baar
uchak kar darwaje par laat mari…
“ruko…”abki baar andar se aawaz aayi, jiske thodi der baad aawaz dene wali bhi
bahar aayi…
“Arman tum, mujhe laga tha ki tum hoge…”jamhayi lete hue Vandana Rathi boli
par main jaan gaya ki uski jamhayi natural nahi hai…
“kaun hai ye…”thode gusse me andar andhere me se ek aur aaawaz bahar aayi…
kisi mard ki aawaz…
“sala, ye kaun kahani me new character aa gaya…ise toh maine dala hee
nahi…”andhere me us aawaz ki taraf dekhte hue maine socha…par mujhe siway
247
ghupp andhere ke kuch nahi dikha… “mere kaan toh nahi baj rahe, ya sach me
andar koyi hai…”
“Arman raat ke 11 baje rahe hai…”mujhe dekh-kar Vandana Rathi boli…
Nahi… actually usne pahle mujhe dekha aur phhir kaha… ya phhir pahle kaha aur
phhir dekha… ya phhir kahte hue dekha hoga ya dekhte hue kaha hoga, ye bhi ho
sakta hai ki usne mujhe dekha na ho… main ekdum sure nahi tha… kyunki VR ke
flat ki sabhi lights off thi aur mujhe sirf itna dikh raha tha ki ek lady nightgown
pahankar mujhse kuch doori me apne flat ke darwaje ke paas khadi hai…. lekin wo
mujhe saaf-saaf dekh sakti thi kyunki mere flat ki boundary me jalne wala bulb
itna prakash phaila raha tha ki meri shakl us mahila ko dikh sake… in short, Main
Mahan, Mera bulb Mahan….
par ab ek sawal jo mere mann me strike kiya wo ye ki wo nightgown me randi jaisi

dikhne wali mahila aakhir thi…. kaun aur itni raat ko main yaha kya kar raha
hoon… mujhe toh abtak mutth markar so jana chahiye tha…
“two point o… ? ye raand kaun hai be”
“Rathi hai be…”
“oh, got it…”nightgown pahan kar andhere me mere saamne khadi Rathi ko
dekhkar maine khud se kaha “mast nightgown pahni hai… is-se chodne me aasani
hogi. bas deewar ke paas le jakar is kutiya ko kutiya banao aur nightgown
uthakar, chaddi neeche khiskakar chodne lag jao… I like this simplicity.”
“Arman…raat ke 11 baj rahe hai…”
“aapne dinner ka vaada kiya tha… aaj…. shayad”
“oh…toh isliye tum yaha aaye ho, come on Arman… tum bhi jante ho ki maine
mazak kiya tha… lagta hai tumne dil pe le liya”
“behan ki lawdi, teri dayi ka pond… bahut dil pe le liya…le liya , dialogue maar
rahi hai… jis din main marunga na toh muh se moot nikal jayega…”
“again lip reading… waise boundary wala gate toh maine lock kiya hai, tum andar
kaha se aa gaye..”
“time mam… time… Time is the most powerful weapon of the mankind and you are
wasting it by…”
“aage bolo… ye main pahle bhi sun chuki hoon”
“mera matlab tha time bachane ke liye main boundary kood kar aaya…gate ki
taraf maine dhyan nahi diya…”
“Vandana ise bolo, ab ye yaha se jaye…”ek baar phhir andhere me khada insaan
thode gusse se bola aur jiske baad Vandana Rathi us baat ko repeat karti uske
pahle hee boundary kood kar time bachate hue main apne flat me aa gaya….

248
“Madarchod, mann toh kar raha hai ki iska sar deewar me patak-patak kar chodu
aur phhir chodne ke baad ise jinda jala doon… iski toh toh maiyya chod dunga, bas
kisi din mood ban jaye mera…. Jo Daddu ne us randi ke sath kiya, wo main iske
sath karunga… nagdi kahi ki…gandmari”
.
“ghor bezzati….”….yahi shabd thik rahega us chiz ko bayan karne ke liye jo thodi
der pahle mere sath hua tha… nahi ye shabd thoda kamzor hai…
“ghanghor bezzati…”…ye world sahi rahega….par kya fark padta hai…? par yadi
koyi fark nahi padta toh main yaha aadhi raat ko apne chhat par kya kar raha
hoon..? kya main Vandana Rathi par nazar rakhne aaya hoon ya phhir jumping-
japak ,thumping thapak karne…? Ya phhir aise hee tahalne…? Ya phhir cigarette
peene…?
“Abhi thodi der pahle toh yaad tha…itni jaldi kaise bhool gaya.. 2.0”
“Vandana Rathi par nazar rakhne aur ye dekhne ki wo aadmi kaun hai...”
“good…thank you”
.
Aadhi raat ko chhat ke kinare wale hisse me Vandana Rathi ke flat ki taraf muh
karke main baitha aur puri raat yun hee baithe-baithe guzar di… is dauran mujhe
kayi baar 5-10 minute ki jhapkiya bhi aayi aur mujhe dar bhi laga ki kahi neeche
na gir jaun warna yadi neeche gira toh mera sar foot sakta hai aur main mar bhi
sakta hoon… lekin marne ke dar se main apne kadam peechhe toh nahi kar sakta
na… ye sarasar mere dwara meri khud ki insult hogi… isliye sar ko bachane ke liye
maine helmet pahna aur helmet pahan kar puri raat chhat ke kinare baithkar
guzar di.. maine kayi baar jhapkiya bhi peli aur kayi baar un jhapkiyo me mujhe
bade ajeeb-ajeeb sapne bhi aaye jaise ki main neeche gir raha hoon… jaise ki Arun
ko ek ladki ne sandel utar kar mari ho… jaise ki Esha meri zindagi me wapas aa
gayi hai par ek sapna sabse ajeeb tha… jisme meri shadi tak ho chuki thi aur mere
do launde bhi the… bole toh chhote-chhote Arman par sapne me jo sabse ajeeb aur
sabse khas tha wo ye ki meri wife…… meri wife….. Angelina thi. chalo haqiqat me
na sahi, sapne me hee sahi…
…kash ki mera ye sapna sach hota… kitna maza aata yadi Angelina meri wife hoti
toh ? full to enjoy… kabhi main us par hawi toh kabhi wo mujh par, hum dono ki
mast ladayi hoti, phhir hum dono kuch dino ke liye ek-dusare se baat karna band
kar dete aur phhir… ant me, Angelina mujhe mana leti aur phhir …. Iske aalawa
main apne laundo ko basketball khelna sikhata, ladkiya patana sikhata aur ye
sikhata ki apne teachers se jyada na dare… unke baap ke saamne unke teachers ki
koyi aukat nahi hai… yadi unke teachers unhe nahi padhayenge toh unka
Yugurush baap unhe padhayega… maine unhe aur bhi kayi chize bhi sikhata aur
sath me dialogue marna bhi…
Ek achchhe sapne ki khas baat ye hai ki us sapne ke tootne ke sath dil bhi toot jata
hai… that’s the first characteristic of the sweet dream. anyway, maine haar nahi
mani aur raat bhar apne mission me data raha… mera luck achchha tha ki main
neeche nahi gira aur jab subah hui toh Rathi ke boundary wale gate ke khulne ki
aawaz se meri neend achanak khuli…
249
“ye toh jana-pahchana lag raha hai… yahi kal raat Vandana Rathi ke sath andhere
me khada hokar hoshiyari de raha tha… par sala hai kaun, iske paas toh Vandana
Rathi se bhi jyada mahangi car hai… bahut rahis hoga lawda…”chhat ke kinare se
thoda peechhe hat-te hue maine kaha aur apna helmet utara…
“pura sar jhanna raha hai, aankhe jal rahi hai… khair puri raat jagne ka fayda bhi
hua, iski shakl dekhne ke liye baitha tha… wo dekh liya… car aur car ka number
bhi dekh liya… not bad… love you Arman, kitna mahan hai tu ”
.
Ab jab maine puri raat jasoosi ki thi toh din me chhoti-moti jhapki aana toh aam si
baat thi aur tab ye aur aam si baat ho jati hai jab aapki nazar computer screen me
pade… ek toh aankh waise bhi jal rahi thi upar se Sharda Enterprises me computer
screen par jab bhi meri nazar padti toh meri aankh tez jalan ke karan apne aap
band ho jati aur yadi main jabran aankh khol ke computer screen par aankhe
gadaye rakhne ki koshish karta toh meri aankh se aansu nikalne lagte… kul
milakar Sharda Enterprise me mera aaj ka din kuch thik nahi ja raha tha… upar se
aaj jo file mere paas aayi thi, usko lekar Vandana Rathi ne mujhe khas kaha tha ki
main use aaj hee complete kar doon, wo bahut important hai. isliye main kaise bhi
karke haar nahi maan raha tha… lekin jab computer me kaam karna namumkin ho
gaya toh maine apni aankh me eyedrop dali aur kuch der ke liye chair me peechhe
sar tikakar apni aankh band kiye ludhak gaya… jiske karan mujhe turant neend
bhi aa gayi…
“bhau…Arman bhau… bhau… utho bhau…”mujhe uthate hue kisi ne kaha…lekin

meri neend itni gahri thi ki mujhe hosh hee nahi raha ki main is waqt sharda vihar
me hoon…. main sota hee raha…
“ye kya bhau… bhau laga rakha hai, ye sharda enterprises hai…tumhara gaanv
nahi.. yaha aise dehati words ka istemaal mat kiya karo… itna sikhati hoon tumhe
lekin tum ganwar ke ganwar hee rahoge….”
“sorry mam….Arman sir…uthiye..”
Aur phhir main utha. mujhe pata nahi ki neend se jagte waqt mera chehra kaisa
tha par mere chehre ka expression dekhkar waha saamne mauzood sab log hasne
lage….. jinhe dekhkar maine pahle apni aankhe sahlayi aur phhir bola…
“kya hua…”
“tum so rahe the..Arman…”ekdum thande swar me mere samne khadi Vandana

Rathi boli… mujhe uski aawaz pasand aayi aur sath me wo bhi…
“wo, kal raat ko dinner na karne ki vazah se bhookh ke karan puri raat jag kar
bitani padi…”Vandana Rathi ko indirectly taana marte hue maine kaha…jiske
baad wo muskura kar waha se apni pond matkate hue chali gayi….
Lekin waha Vandana Rathi akele nahi thi, waha Jaggu bhi tha aur sath me
R.Princy bhi…

250
“tumne kal raat dinner nahi kiya…. Kya tumhare paas paise nahi the..”Vandana
Rathi ke waha se jaane ke baad Princy boli…
jise maine ignore mara aur apne pant ki jeb me hath dalkar neend me khade hue
apne lund ko adjust karne laga… jispar Princy ne ek baar phhir apna sawal
dohraya…
“ye behan ki lodi…kab mere jitna hoshiyar hogi aur samjhegi ki dusare ke matter
me kuch nahi bolna chahiye aur tab toh bilkul bhi nahi jab wo matter mera
ho…maaaaaaadddhr… main tere.. main tere …. Bhosde me bomb fod dunga…
nagdi, madarchod”Princy ko saamne khada dekh maine andar hee andar socha…
“kya tumne sach me kal raat kuch nahi khaya…”
“tu ja na behan…apna kaam kar… please”
“okay, as your wish…mujhe kya”waha se khisakte hue Princy boli
“waise kal raat ko maine sach me khana nahi khaya. Jaggu, ja.. bhagkar ja aur 10
samose bhagkar le aa…paise mere account me add karwa dena.jaldi ja aur jaldi se
aa…phhir tujhe bf deta hoon”
“thik hai bhau…sorry… bhau nahi….sir…”

.
Eyedrop ki vazah se meri aankho ko aaram mila aur samosa ki vazah se mere pet
ko… aur phhir maine file kholi aur 4 baje tak puri file salta kar Yogi-jogi ko mail
kar diya….
Mana ki main ek Yugpurush hoon lekin hoon toh ek insaan hee isliye kal raat ko na
sone ki vazah se aur aaj dinbhar chair me baithe rahne ki vazah se thakan mujhpar
hawi thi… itni hawi ki mera sar beech-beech me buri tarah ghoomne lagta…
yaad hai…jab bachpan me humlog jhat barabar the toh kaise apne dono hath
phaila kar gol-gol ghooma karte the aur phhir jab gol-gol ghoomte hue humari
gand fat jati thi toh rook jate the… lekin phhir bhi humara sar ghoomte rahta tha…
hume aisa lagta ki jaise prithvi ab bhi ghoom rahi ho aur kafi der tak humare sar
me dard bhi rahta tha…. same waisich feeling mujhe abhi ho rahi thi… mera
matlab mujhe bhi aisa lag raha tha ki jaise pura sharda enterprises mere charo
taraf ghoom raha ho,sath me waha mauzood log bhi aur cabins bhi lekin main jaha
tha, meri jo position thi…wo fix thi… jaise main surya hoon aur ye sab planets aur
sab mere charo taraf ghoom rahe ho… mere charo taraf ghoomte logo ko main apni
gardan ghoomakar dekhta lekin unse kuch kahta nahi tha…
Mujhe bathroom jana tha aur main chala bhi jata lekin problem ye thi ki jo raasta
bathroom ki taraf jata tha wo raasta bhi speed ke sath mere charo taraf ghoom
raha tha… isliye main jab us raaste ki taraf badhta toh wo ghoom kar saamne se
hat jata… maine kayi baar koshish bhi ki…ek timing fix ki.. ki itne samay me
bathroom ka raasta ek chakkar pura karta hai aur uske according apni seat se
uthkar bathroom ki taraf jaane wale raaste me speed ke sath kooda bhi…lekin ya
toh main kabhi thoda fast ho jata ya phhir thoda late… kabhi main canteen wale
raste me pahuch jata jata toh kabhi exit wale raste me...jaha se phhir mujhe wapas
apni seat par aana padta….
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Office me jis jagah main baith-ta tha, waha wapas aane me mujhe koyi dikkat nahi
ho rahi thi…kyunki wo jagah fix aur stable thi… isliye main bade aaram se kisi bhi
raaste se wapas aa jata.... maine phhir se revolution ki timing note ki aur kitne
seconds baad sharda enterprises ka kaun sa phase saamne aata hai, use observe
karne laga… maine apni desk par rakha ek white paper uthaya aur usme apni
observation likhne ke liye pen dhoondhne laga… lekin pen mere paas nahi tha…
isliye maine apni imagination ka sahara liya aur apne imagination ke through
usme imaginary reading likhne laga… shuru-shuru me toh mujhe problem hui yani
ki shuru-shuru me mera kaam nahi bana lekin jab 23rd time tak koshish karne ke
baad 24th time me main success hua aur maine us A-4 size ke paper me apne dimag
se ek bahut bada circle banaya aur beech me uska center , jaha is waqt main baitha
tha… maine us circle ke circumference me kayi section ko denote kiya…jaise ki VR's
cabin, way to the canteen & bathroom...
“20 seconds me ek complete revolution aur 7th second me bathroom wala raasta
mere saamne aata hai…start..ek...do...dhai...teen...sadhe
teen...char...paanch.....sadhe paanch...chhakka”time dekhte hue main apni desk
par chadha aur jaise hee mere ghadi ki sui ne saatwa second indicate kiya… maine
desk se chhalang laga di….
“ hail Lord Arman…”bathroom ke raaste me sahi salamat pahuchkar angadayi lete

hue maine kaha
lekin meri problem yahi khatm nahi hui thi… ab main us circle ke stationary point
se koodkar moving section me aa gaya tha aur ab main bhi us moving section ke
sath ghoom raha tha… isliye bathroom tak pahuchna ab bhi aasan nahi tha… main
kabhi dhakka khakar kabhi ek taraf takrata toh kabhi dusari taraf… ek baar toh
main girte-girte bacha aur ek baar aisa jor ka jhatka laga ki…. Laga wapas center
me pahuch jaunga par maine haar nahi mani aur deewar ke sahare , deewar ko
pakadte-pakadte bathroom tak pahucha aur jaise hee bathroom ka darwaja band
kiya…. sab kuch normal… sab kuch normal ho gaya…
Bathroom me apna kaam tamam karne ke baad main bahar nikla toh dekha ki
office me mauzood har ek manushya mujhe ghoor kar dekh raha tha… mujhe pata
nahi wo sab mere baare me kya soch rahe the aur na hee mujhe iski parvaah hai,
lekin jab unhone mujhe ghoorna band nahi kiya toh mera matha thanka aur main
chillakar un sabse bola….
“stunt dekh ke pet nahi bhara kya, ab autograph bhi chahiye kya be tum logo ko…
apna-apna kaam karo na…”
Jiske turant baad mere computer ke bagal me rakha telephone baja and as
expected… phone sexy Vandana ka tha…
“abhi…mere cabin me aao…”
“I’m cumming…”Telephone ka receiver rakhkar maine kaha
Maine apne desk se file uthayi aur apna bag kandhe me taang kar Vandana Rathi
ke cabin me pahucha…
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“Resignation…”apna resignation letter badi shaleenta se dete hue maine kaha….
“Resignation ?”hairan hokar Vandana mam ne mera resignation letter khola aur
phhir mujhe wo letter dikhate hue boli “ye toh blank hai…”
“imagination mam imagination… imagination se maine apna resignation letter

type kiya hai, isliye shayad aapko ye blank dikh raha hai par aap yadi apni
imagination power ka istemaal karke dekhengi toh payengi ki ye sach me
resignation letter hai, jisme maine saaf-saaf likha hai ki abki baar…. Modi
Sarkar… nahi Modi Sarkar nahi… maine apni imagination power se likha hai ki
abki baar main kisi se sorry nahi bolne wala… phhir last me maine bold me apna
name bhi type kiya hua hai… jiska size hai-24, color-black…font-algerian aur toh
aur maine underline bhi kiya hua hai aur signature bhi…”
“Arman…this is totally blank…okay…and why the hell are you talking about
resignation ?”
“really..i mean…really, you ain’t going to fire me…”
“noooo… who told you that… and never use ain’t contraction. Ain’t isn’t the part of
formal english”
“no one… I told to myself… actually I assumed that.. that…”
“you assumed…? hell ”khisiyate hue Vandana mam ne cabin me rakha computer on
kiya aur usme sharda enterprises ki video recording play ki…
“oye…ye toh main hoon…”us video recording me khud ko dekhkar main khushi se
bola…
“mujhe bhi pata hai ki ye tum ho… lekin tum ye kar kya rahe ho, tumhe nahi lagta
aise sab logo ke samne apne desk me chadhkar neeche kood kar bathroom jane ka
tumhara tareeka thoda ajeeb hai…. tum chahte kya ho aur tum saabit kya karna
chahte ho… humne tumhe wapas Sharda Enterprises me wapas bulaya iska matlab
ye nahi ki tum jo aayega wo karoge aur itna hee nahi ye dekho tum phhir
bathroom jaate samay khud se khud ko dhakka dekar deewar se takra rahe the…
aakhir tum kar kya rahe the, tumhe pata nahi par pichhale do din me tumhare
khilaf darjano complain aa chuki hai…”
“jin logo ne complain ki hai unke name mujhe dijiye…kal se complain nahi aayegi…
I assure you”
“what….does….that…..mean…”gurrate hue Rathi boli
“that means…. If you want to make your life easy then take the things easy…. Mera
matlab aap is chhoti si chiz ko itna bada kyun bana rahi ho… mana ki mera is
tarah desk se koodkar bahar aana thoda….thoda…thoda…”
“behuda…”

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“haan…behuda…. Mana ki mera aise desk se koodna thoda behada hai, lekin ise
aap easy lo na aur yadi main iski tah tak jaun aur aapko pura sach batau… jo ki
aap sun-na chahti hai toh… sach ye hai ki us waqt pura office solar system ban
gaya tha… you know solar system…? Sun, Planets, moons… asteroids… comets ?”
“continue…”
“ toh pura office mere charo taraf ghoom raha tha… mujhe chakkar aa rahe the,
mujhe pata nahi kya ho gaya tha..par wahi ek tarika tha jo mujhe is-se nikal sakta
tha… isliye maine aisa kiya…”
Itna bolkar maine samne dekha… Vandana mam mujhe aise ghoor rahi thi jaise
maine unki choot ke baare me kuch kah diya ho… wo matlab meri baat sunkar
bahut jyada gussa thi… itni gussa ki yadi meri jagah Jagat hota toh wo use
madarchod tak bol deti… unhone do-teen lambi-lambi saanse li aur apne gusse ko
breathing ke through dissipate karne lagi…
“if you want to make your life easy, take the things easy…”maine repeat kiya, jise
sunkar Vandana mam thoda relax hui…thoda kya… bahut jyada relax hui…
“ise meri baat ab jakar samajh aayi kya…? lagta hai iski English kamzor hai…
nagdi kahi ki… pond marwate rahti hai raat bhar”
“Armaaaaan….”ek aur lambi saans bhar kar wo boli “mujhe lagta hai, tumhe rest
ki zaroorat hai… shayad tumhari personal problems tumhe kuch jyada hee
pareshan kar rahi hai… jaise ki tumhara, tumhari girlfriend se breakup… yadi tum
kuch din ke liye break lena chaho toh le sakte ho…”
“no.. I hate breaks… and of course I miss her but now I don’t want her…”
“as your wish… lekin ek baat ka dhyan rakhna ki yadi ab tumne aisi koyi ut-
patang harqat ki toh main tumhe replace kar dungi…”
“aap mujhe replace nahi kar sakti…actually nobody can….Nobody can replace me
because I’m unique like heath ledger was as joker.”
“joker… I like joker very much”
“ yeah, me too…let me show you something…”waha desk par se ek pen uthakar

maine desk me seedha rakha aur bola “I'm gonna make this pencil disappear. Tah-
da ! it’s..it’s gone”
Mere us harqat par Vandana Rathi bhi muskura gayi… wo chahti toh nahi thi par
phhir bhi wo muskura gayi aur tab uski muskan aur badh gayi jab maine Joker ki
ek aur line us par fek ke mari… “you wanna know how I got this scars…?”
“no.. because I know your father was a drinker and a fiend. And one
night…..”muskurate hue Rathi boli “kya tum har samay aise hee rahte ho…kya aisi
koyi chiz hai jiske liye tum kabhi serious hote ho…”

254
“I only care about 2 things….time and money. but now time is like my toy…I can
stop it, I can extend it or cease it… actually, you know…. I play with time hence, I
only care about money…”
“good one…”
“May I go now…”
“hmmm…”
Main waha se utha aur bas utha hee tha ki Vandana mam ne ek aur sawal daga….
“who taught you to behave like this…it’s interesting”
“ learned from a child….”bolkar main waha se jaane laga lekin ek baar phhir
Vandana Rathi ne mujhe aawaz mari…
“Arman, kal raat ke liye sorry… maine tumhe office me dinner ke liye kaha aur
phhir…. …Tumhe bahut bura laga hoga na…”
“bura…? jaisa ki maine pahle bhi kaha hai main chizo ko easily accept kar leta
hoon… yadi mujhe koyi goli bhi maar de toh main khud se yahi bolunga ki… come
on yar, sirf ek bullet hee toh lagi hai…”
“Arman… main jyada ghuma-phirakar chizo ko na toh samajhti hoon aur na hee
bolti hoon. Kal tumhe dinner par invite kiya tha…lekin…. Use hatao, aaj raat ko
tum sach me invited ho, be there at 9 pm…okay”
“okay…”
.
Main apne room aaya… samay ke sath ghadi ke kaate badle aur sath hee mere
kapde bhi aur raat ko 9 bajkar 2 minute me maine Vandana Rathi ka darwaja
knock kiya aur mere darwaja knock karne ke paachve second me Vandana Rathi
ne gate khol kar chhathe second me mujhe smile ke saat andar aane ke liye kaha….
Aur saatve second me main andar ghusa
“jitney bade log, utna bada dikhawa….”Rathi ke dinning table ki taraf dekhte hue
maine khud se kaha….
Rathi mam ne apna table utna nahi sajaya tha lekin phhir bhi jo bhi tha jitna bhi
tha kamal lag raha tha… mujhe jo chiz dinning table me sabse jyada pasand aayi
wo thi unke table me sajawat ke sath rakhi gayi daru ki glasses… bole toh kya
dhasu design me glasses ko rakha gaya tha… ek glass me daru dalu aur jab wo full
hoga toh daru neeche wale glass me transfer hone lagega… dinning table ke
tablecloth aur table par rakhi napkins itni ironed thi jitna ki mere kapde nahi the
aur baat karu Vandana Rathi ki toh wo toh kamal hee lag rahi thi… usne ek black
color ka koyi dress pahna hua tha, jis-se uske sharir ke ek taraf ka hissa, kandhe se
lekar kamar tak ka khula hua tha aur main apni baat karu toh ye sab mujhe sirf
ek…ek dhokha sa lag raha tha, jaha ek Manager apne colleague ko ye dikha rahi
thi ki wo kitni rich hai aur sath hee sath apne jism se use vash me karne ki
255
planning kar rahi thi…. warna itni thand me aise kapde kaun pahanta hai… jaha
doodh ka kuch hissa side se dikhe ?
Chapter-25: Lascivious
“kya ye ek date hai…?”jab Rathi ke yaha ki servent mere saamne plate rakhne lagi
toh maine VR se puchha aur muskura diya… lekin Rathi mam apna muh band
karke meri aankho se aankhe milakar kuch der tak mujhe dekhti rahi… gusse se
toh nahi lekin pyar se bhi nahi… bole toh neutral… normally, jaise ek anjaan
manushya, dusare anjaan manushya ko anjaane me dekhta hai
“tumne date kaha…? Age difference dekhi hai..”
“10 to 12 years…? I can shorten it. You know, time is my toy”
“yes, I know you play with time…you can extend it, stop it or compress it… main
sun chuki hoon…par seriously tumne date kaha…?”
“mujhe aisa laga ki ye ek date hai… actually mere andar se aawaz aayi, jise maine
bahar transfer kar diya…”
“transfer karne se pahle dekh liya karo ki aas-paas kaun hai…”pahle ki tarah
neutrally dekhte hue Rathi mam boli aur soup ka pyala uthaya…. Ek to log soup
kyun peete hai, mujhe samajh nahi aata… sala full time barbadi… time ki kadra
hee nahi hai logo ko.
Vandana Rathi ke yaha kaam karne wali servent ne jo ki adhed umra ki mahila thi
unhone meri plate me do parathe aur do-teen type ke pata nahi kya-kya rang-
birange liquid rakha phhir jab maine use taste kiya toh maloom chala ki BC ye to
sabji aur chatni hai… Parathe dekhkar maine ek baar Vandana Rathi ko
dekha…wo fork se parathe ko cheed-fad ke kha rahi thi… Rathi mam ko dekhkar
mujhe khayal aaya ki mujhe bhi aisich fork se khana chahiye aur maine aisa kiya
bhi… lekin ek parathe ka kaleja cheerkar khane ke baad mera munda thanka aur
maine dono fork ko wahi table par rakhkar apna coat utara aur shirt ki baah upar
karke parathe ko pakda aur beech se cheerkar do tukde kiye. Un do tukdo me se
maine ek tukda uthaya aur waha jitney bhi prakar ke liquid, semi-solid the sabko
thoda-thoda parathe ke us tukde me dalkar apna muh fada aur pura ka pura ek
baar me gapp kar gaya….
Mere is tarah se khane ko dekh Vandana Rathi ne soup peena band kar diya aur
thodi narazagi se mujhe dekhti rahi, shayad wo is waqt soch rahi thi ki usne bhi
kise dinner ke liye invite kiya hai… mera khana dekh kar uska khana band ho gaya
lekin maine apna concentration nahi bigada aur bina baat kiye samne lagi kuch
paintings ko dekhkar lagatar khata raha aur jab waha table par rakhe aakhiri
parathe ka aakhiri aadha tukda maine muh me dala toh Vandana Rathi boli…
“aur…”
Jiske jawab me maine kuch nahi kaha kyunki mera muh pura packed tha aur jab
mera muh thoda khali hua toh maine kaha “ab nahi… ab chawal-dal khaunga
papad ke sath… dahi me mix karke”

256
Jise sunkar Vandana Rathi mujhe aise dekhne lagi jaise maine us-se chawal-daal
nahi balki uski gand mang li lo… bole toh full aashcharya-chakit…
“aap kyun nahi kha rahi…”pura paratha khatm karne ke baad maine puchha
“tumhe dekhkar hee mera pet bhar gaya…”
“mera ek dost hai… Arun. usi ne mujhe is tarah khana sikhaya tha, bolta tha ki aise
khane se khana pet me nahi dil me jaata hai… jis-se dil swasth rahta hai… main toh
bolta hoon aap bhi aise hee khaya karo… kaha ye chammach-chhuri ke chakkar me
apne dil ko kharab kar rahi ho…”
“tum college me hostel me rahte the na…?”
“haan…aapko kaise pata…”
“khane ke tarike se pata chal gaya aur ye jo tumhari dil wali philosophy hai na wo
sab jhooth hai… tumlog sabse jaldi sabse jyada kha sako isliye tumlog aise khate
ho…”
“gazab… aapne toh ek baar me pakad liya....mera jhooth”
Table me jis pateele me chawal laya gaya tha usko uthakar maine aadha apni plate
me udela aur phhir Vandana Rathi ko aur pateele me rakhe baki chawal ko
dekhkar compare kiya ki wo itna kha payegi ya nahi… Nahi kha payegi, isliye
maine pateele se thoda chawal aur apni plate me udel liya aur phhir se samne
deewar me tangi paintings ko dekhkar khel shuru kar diya…. main khana khate
hue kafi der tak deewar me lagi un paintings ko dekhta raha, mujhe un paintings
me se ek jaani-pahchani lag rahi thi….
“abhi yaad aaya…”khana khate hue maine jor se kaha
“kya yaad aaya…”
“yahi ki ye ye painting maine kaha dekhi hai…”
“tum painting exhibition me bhi jate ho…?”shocked hokar Rathi boli…
“nahi… par jab main school me tha tab maine ye painting news paper me dekhi
thi… ye painting 29 desho me first aayi thi… par yadi gaur karo toh kuch hai nahi
isme… painter ne alag-alag paint me brush dala hoga aur phhir randomly tarike se
brush ko drawing sheet me jaise mann aaya waise marta gaya… is-se achchhi
painting toh mere college ka Rajshri Pandey karta hai wo bhi muh se…”
“muh se… seriously”haste hue Vandana mam ne pyar se mera name pukara
“Arman…”
Lekin maine use koyi tawajjo nahi di aur khana khane me busy raha…. Mera ek
siddhant hai ki khana khate aur mutth marte waqt ek dum shant rahna chahiye
tabhi inme maza aata hai….

257
“Arman….”
“you like my name....? Actually I like it too, but sometimes I feel like this is not my
name….. I feel like everything in this world is a lie … I feel like I’m not here… you’re
not here… we never met each other… I don’t know but sometimes it seems like all is
in my mind.. I’m living someone’s else life… I was on the way to find myself
but………I lost the way… now tell me where am I now ?”
“in E-5, River View Colony, Nagpur… very poetic words. that is a poem, right…….?
You’re not here, I’m not here…. We never met each other…. Good poem.”
“just abhi banaya… aapko dekhkar. Waise aap yaha akele rahti hai…? ya koyi aur
bhi…”
“aur ye tum kyun puch rahe ho…”
“apne aas-pados walo ko janna chahiye… warna kal aapne koyi kand kar diya toh
police ki help kar saku… main ek jimmedar bhartiya hoon”
“haan… main akele rahti hoon…”
“phhir kal raat ko wo jo andhere me tha wo kaun tha… zaroor Vandana Rathi ka
aashiq raha hoga….”khana khatm karke hath dhote samay maine mann me
socha…
“mujhe pata hai tum kya soch rahe ho…”main hath dho hee raha tha ki Vandana
mam bol uthi “tum kal raat jo mere sath tha, uske baare me puchh rahe ho…”
“mam, let’s play truth and dare…”
“why…”
“kyunki mujhe aisa lagta hai ki ladkiyo me na toh sach bolne ki himmat hoti hai
aur na hee kuch karne ki daring…”Vandana Rathi ki maid ko waha se jate hue dekh
main bhari khush hua aur Rathi ko bhadkane laga…..
“maine tumhare bare me ek chiz notice ki hai… tum ek misogynist ho… do you even
know what misogynist means…?”
“a person who dislikes, despises, or is strongly prejudiced against women.”
“correct…”smile marte hue VR boli aur apne dress ko kandhe ke paas lage
mechanism se thoda dheela karke mujhse pani ka jug manga…..
Vandana Rathi kafi der tak mujhe dekhkar muskurati rahi mera matlab mujhe
aisa laga… aur jab mujhe aisa laga tab maine kaha…
“mera dost kahta tha ki jab koyi aurat ya ladki hadd se jyada muskuraye toh uspar
yakin nahi karna chahiye…”
“see, I was right. you’re a misogynist…”

258
“50 %”
“fifty percent ?”
“Because I don’t hate women only, I hate the entire human race…. You should call
me a misanthrope instead of misogynist… I hate everyone”
“you know, you don’t know how pathetic or wretched you really are.”
“everyone has their own style. You have yours, I have mine”
“why do you hate everyone ?”
“you really want to know ?”
“hmm…”chair par thoda tedha hokar baith-te hue Rathi mam ne puchha, jis-se
unka jo without kapde wala part tha wo thik mere saamne ho gaya aur main Rathi
ke us hisse ko lagatar ghoor kar dekhta laga… kafi der tak dekhta raha… Shri
Arman ko kiska dar….
“why you hate everyone…”
“why I hate everyone…”apne khade lund ko pant me adjust karte hue main bola
“hmm… I would like to hear your another… powerful…strong misconception”
Jawab me maine apna dahina hath pant ki jeb ke andar dala aur Rathi ke boobs ka
jo hissa side se dikh raha tha use dekhkar apna lund sahlate hue kaha “ I hate
everyone because they all are fake… they don’t live in reality. they fuck each other
for money, power…….revenge”
“Astonishingly, All the three qualities you just mentioned belong to you… you’re
fake, you don’t live in reality… you have created your own world and here you’re
struggling for money, power or maybe some kind of revenge. Who knows”
“Exactly and that’s why I hate myself too”
“again a strong reply, kaha se copy karte ho ye sab… kya tumne koyi anti-social
group join kiya hua hai…”
“nahi…”maine kaha aur itni der se jo meri aankhe Vandana mam ki chuchiyo par
tiki hui thi, unhe continue VR ki chuchiyo par tikaye rahte hue maine ek shabd me
jawab diya…
table ke karan Vandana Rathi abhi tak dekh nahi payi thi ki main pant ki jeb me
hath dalkar uske samne apna lund sahla raha hoon aur mere hath ki movement bhi
itni slow thi ki VR ko iski bhanak tak nahi lagi…. Maine toh ye aise hee shuru kiya
tha…lekin jab aise hee lund sahlate-sahlate thoda aur samay beeta toh mujhe
samajh aaya ki… main toh Vandana Rathi ko dekhkar mutth maar raha hoon.
Vandana Randi choot zaroor marwati thi par wo chutiya nahi thi. mera matlab,
usne zaroor meri aankho ko notice kiya hoga… kam se kam ek baar toh kiya hee
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hoga…. lekin wo bolti bhi toh kya ? aur karti bhi toh kya…. jaisa ki maine pahle bhi
kaha hai ki ladkiyo me na toh sach bolne ki himmat hoti hai aur na hee kuch karne
ki daring… halaki kabhi-kabhar aisa ho jata hai ki kuch ladkiya thodi-bahut
himmat dikhakar sadak par chhedkhani karne wale laundo ko sandel se marne
lagti hai… ek-do video maine whatsapp aur youtube par dekhe hai…. par… par aisa
isliye nahi hota kyunki un ladkiyo me himmat hoti hai balki isliye hota hai kyunki
wo ladke, ladke nahi hizde hote hai… burchatte sale. mujhe koyi ladki sandel se
marna toh door bas sandel dikha de, madarchod aisa jor se laat gand me marunga
na… ki gand andar ghus kar choot ke raaste se bahar feka jayegi….. lawda… lund
aur choot ke muqable me jeet hamesha lund ki hogi.
Toh R.Rathi ne mujhe kuch nahi kaha aur is beech uski dress me uske bade-bade
tight boobs dekhkar mere hath ki raftaar bhi thodi tez hui par itni tez nahi ki
Vandana Rathi jaan jaye ki main use dekhkar mutth mar raha hoon…. Maine apne
hath ki raftaar thoda aur tez kar di…
“tell me something about yourself… something I don’t know… something you want
to tell me…”apne seene se mera concentration bigadne ke liye Vandana mam ne
mujh par sawal daga… unki koshish thi ki main apna dhyan unke boobs se kisi
tarah hata loon….
“I’m like the free falling objects from the space and it depends on other people’s
gravity that how much can they attract me but unfortunately…… everyone fails to
do so….”
“do you regret anything in life ?….Arman … Armaan… Armaaaaan”thoda tez se

Vandana mam boli…lekin maine unko ignore karke apne hath ki movement bahut
tez kar di, itni tez ki mere is kand ki khabar Vandana Rathi ko bhi lag gayi thi aur
shayad isiliye usne mera naam itni jor se pukara tha.
“Arman…Armaaan…”
maine is baar bhi Vandana Rathi ko ignore kiya aur apne hath ki gati aur tez kar
di…
“Arman , ….stop…”
“no..now I can’t… soooo sooorry…”
“what the…. hell are you…. Are you out of your mind…”
“fuck….yeeeeesss”apna sar upar karke maine kaha aur phhir kaam khatm……….
Jiske baaaaad mujhe realize hua ki maine ye kya kar diya hai… jis thali me khana
khaya, usi me mutth maar diya ? waise toh main guility feel nahi karta aur na hee
is samay kar raha tha… lekin phhir bhi chehre par wo expression lakar bola…
“I’m sorry.. mam, pata nahi… ye kaise… mera khud pe control nahi raha… sorry”
“get out…”glass me rakha pani mere chehre me fek kar Rathi mam boli…
Jiske baad main waha se utha… waise bhi ab main waha ruk-kar karta bhi kya… ?
jo hona tha wo toh ho chuka tha… waise bhi Shri Arman ko sirf ladkiyo ki choot se
260
matlab hai na ki unke chutiyape se…. maine table par se do napkin uthayi… ek se
apna chehre ka pani pochha aur dusare napkin se apna wo wala hath aur waha se
jaane ke liye khada hua…
Main dining table se uthkar bahar jaane laga ki tabhi mere dimag me Vandana
Rathi ka wo ekmatra sawal ghooma… jiska jawab main nahi de paya tha
“do you regret anything in life ”
Main peechhe muda aur bola… lekin phhir main aage muda aur baal-vaal banakar
role se peechhe muda…
“mam, i don’t regret my past rather than I believe in changing it by my strong

imagination…. And you know my imagination power… good night.”
.
NH-6 me ho rahi lagatar vardato ne jisme se kuch vardato ko maine anjaam diya
tha, un vardato ne police ka dhyan kafi hadd tak apni taraf aakarsit kar liya tha…
NH-6 me main akela nahi tha jo raat ko ye sab karta tha… waha aur bhi bahut se
chor, lootere the…. Abhi maine kal ke newspapaer me hee padha tha ki NH-6 me
choro ne ek car me mauzood sabhi logo ko loota aur phhir gala ret kar unki hatya
kar di… uske baad us kand ke neeche mera wala kand tha… jisme ek bike wale ko
lootne ka jikra tha… Police ki patrolling ab itni badh gayi thi ki ab river view
colony me bhi aadhi raat ko patrolling karte hue police kabhi bhi aa dhamakti thi
aur NH-6 ke toh kya kahne ? waha toh jagah-jagah Police wale khade rahte. Aise
me mera colony se aadhi raat ko bahar nikalna hee kafi khatre se bhara hua tha,
kyunki yadi main kaise bhi karke, himmat jutakar itni jordar thand me bahar
jaane ka sochu toh mujhe gate par hee police jeep ke milne ka khatra tha aur maan
lo ki main kaise bhi karke ek flat se dusare flat koodkar girte-padte colony se bahar
bhi nikal jata hoon toh phhir NH-6 me jagah-jagah gasht mar rahe thulle mujhe
dhar lenge… matlab meri next loot me kafi problems aane wali thi, isliye maine ise
step by step solve karne kasocha aur andhere me chhat me baitha police jeep ko
jate hue chup-chap bina kisi aawaz ke chup-chap dekhta raha aur jab police jeeb
waha se gayi toh main neeche aaya lekin colony ke main gate me mujhe phhir se
police jeeb khadi dikhayi di… police wale, jeep se utarkar colony ke guard se kuch
baat-chit kar rahe the… maine turant apna raasta badla aur River View Colony ki
badi si boundary kood kar bahar aaya…
Chapter-26: Fallen
Colony se bahar aakar main road ke bajay maine ek dusari kachchi gali pakdi jo
ubad-khabad thi… upar se pata nahi itni raat me kaun sa jeev kaha se aa jaye.
Mujhe bas itna pata tha ki idhar se ek shortcut hai jo paas me hee bane Central
University ke peechhe se hote hue NH-6 me bahut aage milta hai…. maine apna
khud ka naam liya aur apna naam lekar us raste ki oor mobile ka flash jalate hue
aage badha kyunki aaj kisi ko colony ke aas-paas rok kar lootne me bahut jyada
risk tha…
“bhag madarchod”jab ek gaddhe me mera pair fasa aur main neeche zameen par
lot gaya toh jor se cheekha… “ab bina flash jalaye aage badhunga, dekhta hu
lawda kaun kya karta hai… daiyya-maiyya ek kar dunga sabki…”

261
Bolkar maine apne mobile ka flash band kiya aur mobile jeb me dalkar apne
imagination power ka istemaal karke aage badhne laga…. phhir thodi door aage
jane ke baad maine apne jacket se goggle nikala aur goggle pahankar aage badhne
laga…
“ye lawda, yaha zameen toh upar hee uthe ja rahi hai bahut der se… kahi bhoole se
bhi niche gira toh….? Ghor bezzati hogi… isliye ye zameen mujhe giraye, uske pahle
main khud hee gir jata hoon… kya bolta hai 2.0 ? knock…knock…. Two point O…
abey kaha hai… lagta hai Rathi ko dekhkar mutth marne se naraz ho gaya… inhe
kya maloom meri mahanta ke baare me. wo toh pahle se koyi planning nahi thi
warna Rathi ko lund dikha ke mutth marta, behanchod… randi, bhosdiwali…
mujhe kahti hai ki main us princy ko sorry bolu… Madarchod…. rod garam karke
aar-paar kar dunga… bas Daddu wala matter ek baar salat jaye… ready…”
“kisliye…”
“isliye…”bolkar main peechhe muda aur apni puri taqat se neeche ki taraf andhere
me daudne laga….
“maza aa gaya behanchod, zinda bacha toh ek aur baar karunga...

wwooooooo…”bike ki aawaz muh se nikalte hue main neeche full speed se dauda
aur kayi jhadiyo se takrate hue, apne kapde aur sharir ko chhilte hue main aage
badhta raha… aur tab tak main aise hee muh se bike ki aawaz nikal kar daudta
raha, jab tak mera mann kiya yani ki bahut baar. Main zameen ke us uthe hue
bhag se daudkar neeche aata aur phhir apni imagination power ka istemaal karke
wapas waha jata aur phhir se neeche ki taraf daudta… aisa maine kayi baar kiya
aur har baar race chalu karne ke pahle main Sonam ki maa ko yaad karta tha… jis-
se mere andar energy level full high ho jati thi…. Aur jab ye sab karke main thak
gaya yani ki jab main bore ho gaya toh maine mobile ka flash jalaya aur NH-6 ki
oor dobara badhne laga
main NH-6 me aaya par phhir highway se neeche utarkar thodi doori rakh-kar
andha-dhundh aage badhta raha… taki yadi police patrolling me udhar se gujre
bhi toh mujhe direct na dekh paye aur mujhe waha aas-paas kahi chhipne ka
samay mil jaye. NH-6 se kafi doori banakar NH-6 ke parallel main kabhi daudta
aur jab daudkar thak jata toh hafte-hafte chalne lagta… iske baad main phhir se
daudne lagta… aisa maine taqriban do-dhayi ghante tak kiya hoga, jiske karan
colony kafi peechhe chhot chuki thi aur sath me wo area bhi jaha police gasht mar
rahi thi….
.
Meri NH-6 me loot-maar karne ki simple aur sober trick thi ki logo par main waha
hamla karta tha jaha se main asani se gayab ho jaun isliye meri abhi tak ki sabhi
loot Colony ke aas-paas hee hui thi… lekin main aaj aisa nahi kar sakta tha kyunki
us jagah ke aas-paas aaj police thi jiske karan itni raat me mujhe itna door aana
pada tha. ab main highway ke kinare nahi balki highway par hee chal raha tha,
jiski do vazah thi pahli ye ki yaha koyi street lights nahi thi aur dusari ye ki ab
main itna door aa gaya tha ki idhar shayad hee police aati… highway par aane ke
baad maine bag se nikalkar torch jalaya aur usi ki roshni me aage badhne laga…
main ab bhi thakne tak bhagta aur jab thak kar choor ho jata toh hafte hue chalne
lagta… waha se kayi trucks guzre , kayi car bhi gayi lekin maine kisi ko nahi roka
aur unhe aise hee jaane diya…
262
Main highway par aage badhta gaya… mere saamne se kayi gadiya gayi, lekin
maine kisi ko kuch nahi kiya… mera mood ab colony se itne door aakar change
hone laga tha aur phhir ek jagah aakar main rook gaya… mere mann me actually
ek sawal aaya tha… jiske jawab paane ke liye main apne dimag par jor dal raha
tha…. sawal ye tha ki “yadi bhagwan ne insano ko banaya toh aakhir kyun
banaya… banaya kyun…? 2.0, any answer…”
“mujhe kya pata lawda… maje lene ke liye banaya hoga”
“phhir bhi soch ke toh dekh…”torch ki roshani me zameen se ek patthar uthakar

maine kaha aur puri taqat se sath ek taraf fek diya….
“bataya toh ki…bhagwan ne insano ko maje lene ke liye banaya… for entertaining
purpose…”
“toh humlog ko bhagwan ko entertain karna hai… hai na…”ek dusara patthar
uthate hue maine kaha aur use bhi pahle wale patthar ke path me feka…
“aur nahi toh kya… koyi aur reason ho toh bata…”
“thik hai phhir…”
itne me mujhe police ki siren sunayi di wo bhi samne se… mujhe samajh nahi aaya
ki ye kaise mumkin hai… ek toh police ko idhar aana nahi chahiye tha aur yadi
aana bhi tha toh peechhe se aana chahiye tha… jidhar se main aaya tha. lekin ye
toh saamne se aa rahi hai… ye chutiye itni door tak gasht mar rahe hai…
maine samne ek ped dekha aur uske peechhe chipkar samne se aa rahi siren ko
sun-ne laga…
“ambulance hai be”
“aisa kya…”
“chal loot phhir..”
“nahi, Arman itna neeche nahi gir sakta ki ek ambulance ko loote, bechare waise
bhi tension me honge….”
“toh ?”
“abey koyi patient hoga, critical condition hogi uski… uske gharwale tension me
honge…”
“toh…?”
“yadi wo critical condition wala patient sahi samay me hospital nahi pahucha
toh… mar jayega..”
“mera sawal ab bhi wahi hai…. toh ?”

263
“toh phhir…….. chal…”
Maine turant apne hath me pakde hue patthar ko apne mathe me 2-3 baar mara
aur jab mere mathe se khoon nikalne laga toh khoon ko pure chehre me phailakar
beech sadak par aaya aur ghutno ke beech baithkar apne dono hath hawa me
hilate hue madad magne laga…..
Ambulance dan-dana ke mere paas aayi aur mujhse thodi hee door me ruki, jiske
baad samne jo aadmi baithe the wo turant driver ke sath mere paas aaye….
“kya hua.... ye kisne kiya…”meri taraf jhuk-kar ambulance ke driver ne jor se

puchha, itni jor se ki mera kaan jhanjhana utha…
“tere baap ne…madarchod”bolkar maine apne peechhe rakha hua patthar uthaya
aur jisne mere kaan ke paas chillaya tha uske sar me puri taqat se mara….
“sala, Shri Arman se sawal karta hai…”
Iske baad maine katta nikala aur dusare wale ko jo ki mujhe marne hee badh raha
tha use dikha-kar use wahi roka aur peechhe kiya….
“ambulance ke pichhwade me kaun-kaun hai…”apne chehre par roomal badhte hue

maine puchha…
“patient hai… bahut door se la rahe hai…”
“patient ke aalwa aur kitne log hai andar…”
“do-teen ladies aur ek aadmi hai…”
“koyi mast maal hai kya ?”
“baku… gadi kyun rok di…” itni der me ek aadmi peechhe se bahar aaya aur utar
kar puchha….
“aa… tu bhi idhar aa… lawde ke baal… chal line me lag…”
Maine un teeno ke mobile liye aur un sabko wahi sadak par baithaya... un teeno me
se jo abhi-abhi aaya tha , wo ruwasi shakl banakar mere saamne gid-gidane laga
aur bola ki main use waha se jaane du…warna uska baap beech raaste me hee mar
jayega…
“jaldi –jaldi jo main bolta hoon wo kar , warna tere baap ke sath baki log bhi mar
jayenge… ab apni maa ki tarah rona band kar aur in dono ke sath-sath tere wallet
me jitney paise hai wo sab lakar mujhe de aur tum dono wahi khade rahna warna
yadi tum madarchodo ne koyi gand-masti ki na toh ek-ek ko nanga karke ek-ek ke
gand me do-do goli marunga…. Got it ?”
Un teeno ki taraf maine apna bag feka aur us bag me paisa dalne ke liye bola…
jiske baad un teeno ne bina kisi deri ke mera kaam kar diya….

264
“ab tum dono…driver aur khalasi.. chalo sadak par daudo aur rukna mat, 10
minute tak lagatar daudte rahna…phhir reverse marke wapas aa jana, chalo shuru
karo…”
“bhaiya…please bhaiya, unko mat bhejo… nahi toh gadi kaun chalayega bhaiya…
mere papa ki tabiyat bahut kharab hai bhaiya… samjho bhaiya… please
bhaiya…”apne dono hath jodkar wo bola…
“tum dono ko sunayi diya kya be… ya sale ek-do ko maru tabhi samajh me
aayega…start karo daudna… tumhari maa ka… aur tu sale rondu-lal khade ho aur
bag pakad kar chal mere sath peechhe aa… nahi peechhe nahi, aage chal…”
Maine us aadmi ko jiska baap critical condition me tha use aage kiya aur
ambulance ka peechhe wala darwaja kholne ke liye kaha, is beech meri nazar
sadak par barabar daudte hue driver aur khalasi par thi….. kya pata wo dono kahi
danda lekar mujhe marne na aa jaye… waise bhi is duniya me imandar aur
achchhe log nahi bache… kya bharosa unka.
Ambulance ke andar teen ladies aur ek budhau tha jo oxygen mask lagaye soya
hua tha… teen ladies me se do so rahi thi aur ek umra-daraj mahila budhau ka hath
pakad kar baithi hui thi…
“chal tu bhi andar baith aur jo-jo bolta hoon… chup-chap karte jana aur yaad
rakhna koyi gand-masti nahi aur ye do jo so rahi hai, unhe utha….”
Mere aadesh par us aadmi ne un dono ko uthaya aur phhir jagne ke turant baad
jab un dono ne mujhe dekha aur jab unhe samajh aaya ki yaha kya ho raha hai toh
wo dono rone lagi aur main bata nahi sakta ki us samay mujhe kitna maza aaya….
Matlab ekdum sukoon sa mahsoos ho raha tha…
Maine us aadmi ko un aurato ke sare gahne apne bag me dalne ke liye kaha aur jab
usne aisa kar diya toh bag lekar main waha se jaane ke liye hua lekin tabhi mujhe
seat ke neeche rakha ek bag dikhayi diya….
“is bag me kya hai… khol ise jaldi…mere paas time nahi hai.. ek aur gadi aa rahi
hai..”
“isme sirf humare kapde hai…”ghabrate hue wo aadmi bola aur use dekhte hee
main samajh gaya ki wo jhooth bol raha hai aur main muskurane laga…
“isme paisa hai na… kitna hai…”
“please bhaiya… wo papa ke ilaaz ke liye hai, kuch toh raham karo bhaiya… hum
dua denge aapko..”
“beta, kya tumhe dikhayi nahi de raha ki yaha ek marta hua aadmi hai aur tum
madad karne ki bajay use aur mar rahe ho… kya tumhe insano ki jaan ki koyi
parvah nahi…”wo budhiya boli, jo us budhe ka hath pakad kar baithi hui thi…

265
“mataji sawal ye nahi ki mujhe iski parvah hai ya nahi…sawal ye hai ki yadi main
mar raha hota toh kya taapko meri parvah hoti… tell me, kya aap tab bhi aise
bhasad deti… mere liye…”
“nahi.. kyunki main tumhe nahi jaanti…”
“toh phhir aap mujhse kaise expect kar sakti hai ki main uski parvah karu,jise
main nahi janta…” seat ke neeche se bag kheechte hue maine kaha aur mere aisa
karte hee wo budhiya bol padi…
“bhagwan tumhe kabhi maaf nahi karega…”
“aur na hee tujhe... I’m just entertaining the god”us budhiya ko dekhkar seat ke
neeche se bag nikalte hue maine kaha. Shuru me mujhe khayal aaya ki use pel du,
lekin phhir umra ka lihaj karke maine use jaane diya aur bag lekar waha se bhag
gaya….
.
Waha se bhagne ke liye maine highway nahi pakda.NH-6 north-south direction me
tha aur main andhere west ki taraf bhaga… beech-beech bhagte hue me main bahut
jagah gira bhi par uthkar bhagta raha aur phhir aakhir me pata nahi kya hua…
main kaha pahucha ki mera pair ekdum se fisla aur main neeche girne laga, kabhi
mera sharir kisi patthar se takrata toh kabhi mere sharir ka koyi aur hissa… main
bahut der tak aise hee girta raha… mere dono bag mujhse kab alag hue mujhe pata
nahi chala aur phhir main jhapak se pani me gira….
“sala nadi me gira hoon ya phhir koyi nala hai… smell toh gandi nahi hai, toh
phhir ye nadi hee hogi….”
Maine pani me tairati hui torch uthaya… andar pani ghusne ki vazah se torch ruk-
ruk kar jal rahi thi… maine torch uthaya aur aas-paas nazar mari… jaha main gira
tha wahi mujhse thodi door me nadi me ek bada sa patthar tha… jiska aadha bhag
pani ke andar aur aadha pani ke bahar tha… main kisi tarah langdate hue us
patthar ke paas pahucha aur us patthar par chadhne ke liye jaise hee apna pair
uthaya main wahi jhapak se nadi me gir gaya….
“iski maa ki choot, madarchod….huuuuuhh… itni thandi upar se pura bhig gaya…”
wapas khade hokar main gusse me cheekha…
Torch ab puri tarah se band ho chuki thi aur mujhe ye bhi nahi maloom tha ki
mujhe kis taraf jana chahiye… main toh sirf ye dekh paya tha ki mujhse thodi door
me ek badi si chattan hai… andhere me hath se nadi ke pani ko sparsh karte hue
main dheere-dheere us chattan tak pahucha aur phhir se us chattan par chadhne ki
koshish ki lekin abki baar maine dusra pair uthaya aur chattan par dono hath
rakh-kar chadhne laga…. chattan me chadhte hue maine apne dahine hath me
jyada vazan diya aur mujhe itna dard hua ki mera hath khud-ba-khud mud gaya,
jiske baad pahle mera sar chattan se takraya aur phhir… phhir main nadi me
wapas ja gira….
“iski maad ka lawda…huhhhhu… aaj toh gand hee fat gayi… itna thanda
pani”wapas nadi me khada hokar kanpte hue main gala phadkar chillaya

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Maine abki baar nadi me khade-khade hee apne sharir ke har ang ko thoda-thoda
ghumaya jiske anusar mere daya hath aur daya pair aise the ki mera vazan nahi
sah sakte the… isliye pichhale do baar main chattan me chadhte hue nadi me gir
chuka tha… ek toh thandi, upar se thanda pani ispar se ab mera dimag bhi jawab
dene laga tha… mujhe ab aisa lag raha tha ki jaise main phhir se nadi me girne
wala hoon…
Maine apna pura jor lagaya aur thand me kaanpte hue aage badhne ki koshish ki
aur jaise hee apna baya pair uthaya toh phhir se nadi me ulta ja gira…. Sala
dahina pair me phhir se load de diya.
“maaaadhar…. … Aaj lagta hai, marunga… kitni thand hai be ”
“bhosdike teen baar gand galwa chuka hai ab dahine pair me vazan mat dena,
bakchod…”
“kaun sa daya, kaun sa baya… mujhe toh lag bhi nahi raha ki mere paas pair bhi
hai”
Nadi me mujhe itni jordar thandi lag rahi thi ki mere daant aapas me takrane lage
the… mera sharir sikudne laga tha, main saans bhi leta toh pura badan kaanp uth-
ta lekin main kar bhi kya sakta tha… maine wapas khud ke andar himmat jutayi
aur andhere me hee patthar ki taraf anuman lagate hue badha… mera pura sharir
itni jor se kaanp raha tha ki jaise koyi mujhe pakad ke hila raha ho… par teen baar
nadi me girne ke karan ek chiz jo mere bheje me ghusi thi wo ye ki dahine hath aur
dahine pair me load nahi dena hai… isi baat ko dhyan me rakh kar nadi ke pani ko
thatholte-thatholte main aage badhte hue chattan ke paas pahucha aur seene ke
bal patthar par ghisat-ghisat kar upar chadha…
Main chattan me toh chadh gaya tha lekin meri problem ab bhi kam nahi hui thi,
jisme sabse badi dikkat ye thi ki mujhe puri raat yahi gujarni thi, upar se mere
pure kapde bheeg chuke the… mera dahina hath thoda bend ho gaya tha aur jab
maine use seedha karne ki koshish ki toh seedha tak nahi kar paya… chattan ke
upar baith-kar maine apne aap ko sameta aur kaanpte hue, daant kat-katate hue
bas baitha raha… maine bahut koshish ki sone ki, taaki ye raat kat jaye… lekin itni
thand me neend kaha aane wali thi… maine kayi ghante wahi chattan par gujare
aur phhir jab kayi ghanto ke baad waha aas-paas halki-fulki roshni hui toh maine
apni nazar ghumayi mujhe sab kuch dhundhla-dhundhla sa dikha… ek toh itni
thand me waisi hee sharir me jaan nahi thi upar se ab kuch saaf-saaf dikhayi bhi
nahi de raha tha aur dum toh itna bhi nahi tha ki hil bhi saku... mere kapde kuch
toh sukhe the lekin kayi hisse ab bhi gile the… maine thodi der tak intezaar kiya ki
mujhe thodi der me saaf-saaf dikhna shuru ho jayega, lekin aisa nahi hua… maine
kayi baar apni aankhe switch-off karke switch-on ki, lekin nateeza wahi raha…
isliye maine apni aankhe phhir se band ki aur kanpte hue apne daant kat-katate
wahi nadi ke beech me chattan ke upar baitha raha… aur tab mere mann me ek
sawal aaya ki yadi earth par gravity ki value 10 meter per second square ki jagah
yadi 50 meter per second square hoti toh kya hota….?
“tera pura sharir zameen ki gand me ghus jata, na toh tu khada ho pata aur na hee
tera khada ho pata…”
“chup be, aisi situation me sexy baatein mat kar…”

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phhir thodi der baad dhoop nikli jiski garmi se mujhe thoda aaram mila… Main
kayi ghanto tak wahi chattan ke upar baithkar dhoop sekta raha aur jab laga ki ab
kuch kar sakta toh aas-paas dekha... ab mujhe kuch saaf-saaf dikh raha tha
main jis chattan ke upar baitha tha waha se mushqil se dus kadam ki doori par wo
dhalan thi jaha se main kal raat neeche gira tha… maine dhalan ko dekha usme
chadhna utna mushqil kaam nahi tha… phhir meri nazar dhalan me pade mere bag
me padi aur sath me wahi pade us aadmi ke bag me jise lekar kal raat main bhaga
tha….
“main nahi mara, yani wo budhau bhi nahi mara hoga…. mujhe samajh nahi aata
ki log itne laparwah kyun hai, unhe kuch toh plan `bana kar rakhna chahiye ki
yadi unme koyi hamla karega toh wo kya karenge… ek toh khud laparwah rahte
hai aur phhir bolenge ki mujhe loot liya, mujhe chod diya… jaisa ki main pahle bhi
kayi baar kah chuka hoon ki chutiya banana buri baat nahi hai, chutiya banna
buri baat hai…. anyway, I survived… ”
Jis taraf maine jaane ka socha tha uske viparit yadi main jata toh wo mere liye
jyada aasan tha, kyunki udhar plan surface tha par Upar dhalan me apne dono
bags ko dekh-kar maine khayi me chadhne ka nirnay liya aur dheere-dheere karke
langadate-langadate apne dahine pair par jyada vazan na dekar maine nadi paar
ki aur phhir dhalan me chadhne laga… kayi jagah mujhe aisa laga jaise ki main
wapas niche nadi me girunga lekin har baar kisi chiz ko pakad kar bachta gaya
aur finally waha paas aaya jaha mera bag tha…. maine dusare wale bag ko bhi
ghaseeta aur wahi dhalan me ek bade se patthar ki tek lekar baith gaya
“kal raat maja aaya ? ”hafte hue 2.0 ne puchha, par wo kyun hanf raha tha…
mehnat toh maine ki thi ?
“is bag me tala laga hua hai… katta bhi pata nahi kaha gir gaya…”
“maine tere bag me kal raat chaku rakha tha, dekh toh..”hafte hue 2.0 ne jawab
diya
“thik kiya…”
Maine apne bag se chaku nikala aur us aadmi ke bag ko chaku se fadne laga…
chaku utna tez nahi tha, isliye mujhe bag fadne me time lag raha tha… dahina hath
ab bhi tedha hee tha isliye bag fadne ka kaam main baye hath se dheere-dheere kar
raha tha… yadi koyi chattan ke peechhe se mujhe is waqt hilte hue dekhe toh wo
yahi samjhega ki main mutth mar raha hoon, kyunki maine bag apni jaangho ke
upar rakha hua tha aur baye hath me chaku pakad kar hila raha tha…
“behan…..” jab bag kat-te hue chaku mere hee hath me ghus gaya toh chaku ko
door fek-kar maine kaha “dono hath gaye…”
“kya kismet hai lawda… ek toh waise bhi… ”baye hath se hee bag ko upar uthakar
daant se fadte hue maine socha… aur bag ka kafi hissa daant se fad diya

268
Utsukta me maine bag ko turant neeche patka aur dekhne laga ki uske andar kya
hai…. Bag me shuru me toh kuch kapde the, jinhe maine nikal kar wahi rakha aur
phhir dekha ki un kapdo ke neeche ek laal chunri me notes ki kayi gaddiya lipti hui
thi upar se laal chunri me ek taabiz bandha hua tha…
“wo budhiya koyi chudail toh nahi thi Sali… kahi lene ke dene na pad jaye…”
“bhag lawda…”tabeej nikalkar neeche zameen me rakhte hue maine kaha
“abey jadu-tona ka matter ho sakta hai… chhod ye sab…”
“bhag lawda…”khada hokar us tabeej me moot-te hue maine kaha “ALL hail Lord
Arman”
maine pure rupaye apne bag me bhare aur phhir waha se uthkar aage badha ek
sawal ke sath ki “bhagwan ne hume kyun banaya…”
.
Waha se wapas aane ke liye mujhe kafi mashaqqat karni padi… wo pura ilaaka
jaha main chal raha tha… wo sab khet the… beech-beech me kuch ghar bhi padte
lekin kisi ne meri koyi madad nahi ki… yaha tak ki ek se jab apna chehra dhone ke
liye maine pani maga toh usne kaha ki uske yaha pani nahi hai aur ye sab dekhkar
mujhe bahut khushi hui… yadi us samay mere paas mera katta hota toh sale ko
jaan se maar deta. Phhir maine ek dukan se pani khareeda apne chehre par dala
aur thodi der susta kar phhir se highway ki taraf badh gaya…. mera dahina hath
pura chud chuka tha, dahina pair bhi bas sath de raha tha… sar ke toh lawde lage
hue the aur puri body me mere har badhte kadam ke sath pata nahi kaha-kaha
dard ho raha tha… main toh balki is samay tazzub me tha ki kal raat main survive
kaise kar gaya… ek toh itne upar se neeche gira, phhir puri raat nadi ke beech me
geele kapdo me guzari… kitna achchha hota yadi nadi ke beech-o-beech chattan me
baithe-baithe mar gaya hota toh… par kyunki main zinda tha isliye mujhe wapas
river view colony jaane ke liye paidal chalna pad raha tha… paidal chalte-chalte
main ek gaanv me pahucha jaha se ek truck me baithkar wapas river view colony
pahucha…. Maine apna bag room me feka aur us clinic me pahucha jaha Vivek
kaam karta tha….
Remember Vivek ? jo, Varun aur Sonam ke party me… jis din maine David ko pela
tha us din bro…yo bro kar-karke mera aand kha raha tha. beshak wo Varun ka
dost tha lekin is samay wo mere liye kisi bhagwan se kam nahi tha… kyunki yadi
main kahi aur jata toh mujhe dar tha ki koyi police wagerah ko inform na kare…
upar se is pure Nagpur me ab mere sath aisa koyi shaks nahi tha jo mere liye bahar
se goli-dawayi lakar mujhe dega… langda-langda kar chalte hue aadhe ghante me
main clinic me pahucha… Vivek medical store chalata tha aur uske bade bhaiya
clinic chalate the, jo ki ab mera ilaaz karne wale the wo bhi bina kisi ko bataye….
Chapter-27: The Last Ride
Main Vivek ki clinic me pahucha, wo is samay roti sabji kha raha tha. mujhe waha
apni clinic me dekh Vivek khush hua aur mujhe bhi khane me shamil hone ka nyota
dekar tiffin meri taraf aage badhaya…

269
“bhag lavda...”
“kya hua bro…”
Yadi mera is samay Vivek se kaam nahi hota toh agla number main usi ka lagata
par main gusse se daant peeskar muskurate hue bola
“kuch nahi bro…”
“yo bro…”
“ how are you bro…”
“fine bro…”
“lund lega bro… I mean… mujhe pahchana bro…”
“Arman bro… Varun bro ke bro…”
“yo bro…”
“ye aapko kya hua bro…”
“tu mujhe sach me apna bro… manta hai na…”
“yes bro…”
“chal phhir ,side me aa…”
Vivek ko side me lejakar maine use ek kahani sunayi ki raat me mujhe ek gadi wale
ne thok diya tha… phhir use samjhaya ki jyada ho-halla karne ki zaroorat nahi
hai… bas wo apne bhai ko kisi tarah mana kar mera ilaaz karwa de….
“yo bro…”meri puri baat sunkar usne kaha
“thank you… bro…”
“love you bro…”
“love you too… bro…”

.
Vivek ke medical store se uske bade bhaiya ki clinic attached thi aur uske upar do
room aur the, jo pahle band rahte the par ab waha red cross ka nishan laga tha…
mere khyal se Vivek aur uska bhai upar ke room me do-char bed dalkar apna
dhandha badha rahe the… Vivek ke bhaiya ne mujhe unhi room me shift kiya aur
kayi jagah mere sharir me kaat-pit ki aur phhir mujhe shakt hidayat dete hue 6-7
prakar ki tablets thama di… upar se unhone roj subah-sham injection lagwane ko
kaha…. Mere dahine hath me unhone elastic bandage bandha aur dahine hath me
ek kapda baandh kar mere gardan me wo kapda baandh diya aur bole ki… main
jyada apne dahine hath ko na hilau-dulau… jisme maine haan me sar hila diya.
Aur bhi kayi chize Vivek ke bhaiya ne mere body me jagah-jagah bandhi… jaise
270
meri kamar me , mere chehre me , mere pair me…. thigh me… matlab main har
jagah se toota hua tha…. kahi wo kal raat wala budhau mar toh nahi gaya ?
.
Maine kayi din Vivek ki clinic me kaate , mera mobile nadi me bheegkar kharab ho
chuka tha aur itne din clinic me main din akela hee patient tha, waha mere baad
koyi aur admit nahi hua…. Par beech me ek maal aayi thi, ek ladke ke sath… kafi
gand-fati me thi wo… maine socha ki shayad is ladki ko bawasir ho gaya hai aur
ab ye yahi admit hogi yani ki raat me baye hath se mutth marne ka full jugaad…
lekin wo usi din thodi hee der me hee chali gayi… jiske baad vivek ne mujhe bataya
ki wo ladki bachchha girwane aayi thi…
“bachcha girwane…? Sali randi… kutiya nahi toh. Zaroor kutte se chodwayi rahi
hogi… achchha hua use sochkar ek baar bhi mutth nahi mara…”
“kya kar sakte hai bro…”
“kitna lete ho bachcha girane ka…”
“dus hazar…..bro..”
“wah launde, matlab full kamayi…. Ek baat bata, andar se kya nikalta hai…. pure
liquid rahta hai ya kuch aur”
“time pe depend karta hai”
“aur fekte kaha ho use…”
“humlog nahi fekte… humlog… humlog kyun fekenge ? humlog material ko ek

polythene me bharkar , jo bachcha girwane aaye hote hai…unhi ko de dete hai… ab
ye unki jimmedari hai ki wo kaha fekte hai…”
.
Is tarah maine Vivek ka aur Vivek ne mera…hum dono ne kayi dino tak ek-dusare
ka aand khaya… maine us-se aur bhi kayi baate puchhi jaise ki jab ladkiya
menstrual cycle me hoti hai toh unki gand kyun fat jati hai ? mc ka symptoms kya
hai….? log condoms kaise magte hai, josh wali sabse achchhi goli kaun si hai… kya
ladkiya bhi condoms, Viagra lene aati hai…. is tarah ke kayi atpate sawal main
Vivek se puchhta tha... par in sabhi sawalo se upar jo ek sawal tha wo ye ki…
“why god created us…”
Mere NH-6 me last kaand ke aath din baad jab main chalne ke kaabil hua aur mere
sar ke take toot gaye toh maine clinic se jaane ka socha aur Vivek ko ye baat
batayi….
“main big bro.. se puch ke aata hoon…”
“main puch nahi raha, bata raha hoon….pata nahi Sharda Enterprises walo ne
nikal toh nahi diya… upar se Daddu ko bhi advance me paisa pahuchana hai…”
“thik hai… main puchh ke aata hoon”

271
Aur phhir main ek baar yaha tha… apne college me. apne hostel ki jung lagi kursi
me akela baitha Arun ka intezaar kar raha tha…
“aur launde… bahut din laga diya abki baar yaha aane me, koyi item mil gayi kya
bahar”mere bagal me baith-te hue Arun ne ek cigarette jalayi…
“I’ve been quite busy these past few days… I broke up with Nisha then my new job…
then VR , NH-6”
“and Daddu…”
“you know Daddu ? how”
“I know what you know and that’s a very bad idea…”
“really, I mean…you really think so ? ”
“bakchod hai ka be, marega… tu aukaat me rah, warna is baar coma me nahi
seedhe upar jayega”
“I’m eagerly waiting for death… waise aaj kaun-kaun dikha college me”
“kafi log hai yaha, Deepika mam bhi… maine toh unki class bhi attend ki.”
“bur faad dal.. uski, mast maal hai… yaha toh wo kuch kar bhi nahi sakti. Sabke
samne chod usko… nanga karke… aur koyi dand-fand kare toh maiyya chod dena
uski.. ye bata Esha dikhi…”
“Arman… hostel vibrate ho raha hai…”
“matlab jaane ka time ho gaya… bye”
“bye….”
Lambi saans bharte hue maine apni aankhe kholi… mera sar ab bhi vibration mod
me tha.
Kahne ko toh main 24-25 saal ka hoon par mujhe aisa lagta hai, jaise maine kayi
zindagiya jee li ho, mujhe mera pichhla sab yaad hai… lekin phhir bhi sab kuch
begana sa lagta hai… mujhe aisa lagta hai jaise kisi ne mere dimag ki chip badal di
hai.. kabhi school, toh kabhi college, toh kabhi ghar… inki yaadein kisi na kisi
tarike se mere dimag me ghoomti rahti hai… kabhi Sharda Enterprises toh kabhi
Ganga-Jamuna aur phhir beech-beech me NH-6. Sharda Enterprises me kayi log
mere liye khadoos, akela, sanki jaise shabdo ka istemaal karte hai… mujhse baat
karne me hichkichate hai aur jo koyi bhi kaam ho toh wo Jaggu ke jariye mujhse
karwate hai… mere aur VR ke last dinner ke baad VR bhi ab mujhse door bhagne
lagi hai… wo ab mujhe koyi file nahi deti aur na hee koyi instruction… ab meri,
mere kaam ko lekar sari baat Yogi-Jogi ji se hoti hai… mere office ke kuch log jo
kabhi-kabhar mujhse canteen vagerah me thodi der ke liye baat karte hai wo kahte
hai ki main bahut boring hoon, meri life me koyi adventure nahi hai, koyi mujhe

272
jaanta nahi aur kal yadi main mar gaya toh 134 crore ki jansankhya wale desh me
kisi ek ko bhi koyi fark nahi padega ki main kyun mara…
Aur yadi main khud ke experiences se baat karu toh meri zindagi mujhe ek rang-
manch ki tarah lagti hai , jaha darshak toh badal jate hai lekin show chalta rahta
rahta hai… Mujhe nahi pata ki ye pahle kisi ne kabhi kaha hai ya nahi…shayad
kaha ho ya phhir na bhi kaha ho…ye bhi ho sakta hai ki ise maine kahi padha ho
aur bhool gaya ho…. ya ye bhi ho sakta hai ki ye mujhe pata ho ki ye kisne kaha
aur main natak kar raha hoon….. par mudde ki baat ye hai ki sadak ke kinare
damru lekar nachne wale ko aur unke darshako ko auto se ek pal ke liye dekhkar
aisa laga jaise puri zindagi ka saar main samajh gaya… mujhe zindagi ek rang-
manch ki tarah lagti hai, jisme darshak toh badal jate hai, lekin rang-manch chalta
rahta hai.purane walo ki jagah naye aate hai aur rangmanch ka maza lete hai…
zindagi rangmanch ki hee tarah hoti hai, jaha kisi ko bahut taaliya milti hai toh
kisi ko bahut gaaliya aur unke beech me kuch aise bhi log hote hai…jinhe koyi
mahsoos tak nahi karta. Zindagi rang-manch ke darshako ki tarah bhi hoti hai…
jaha koyi bahut khush rahta hai toh koyi bahut dukhi…kisi ke sath bahut sare log
hote hai toh koyi meri tarah akela hota hai aur ant me parda gir jata hai yani ki
khel khatm…. Zindagi khatm. Phhir naya show, nayi story, naye kirdar, naye
darshak…. Nayi khushi, naya dard. Par main is waqt auto me nahi hoon, main toh
Sharda Enterprises me hoon ? pata nahi main itni jaldi waha se yaha kaise
pahucha aur itni jaldi 10 se 2 kaise baj gaye… rang-manch wali baat toh 10 baje ki
thi aur ab 2 baj chuke hai. beech me kya hua………………… lawda
2 baje main Lunch me apni jagah se utha aur Canteen me gaya…. waha kayi log
aise the, jo ghar se apna lunch late the, kitno ke ghar-pariwar the… sab kitne
khushi se baat karte hue lunch karte the aur main life ko simple banane ke chakkar
me apne ghar se nikal aaya tha.. beshak main isme kamyab raha tha, meri life me
ab sirf main…main aur main hee tha lekin is-se achchhi toh gharwalo ke sath meri
kat rahi thi… kam se kam waha lunch me roj-roj 8-10 samose toh nahi khane padte
the…. Par problem ye thi ki sab log mujhe aise dekhte jaise main kitna bada failure
hoon… yaha tak ki mere ghar bartan majne wali naukrani ki bhi mere baare me
yahi ray thi. main wo tha jiska scope toh tha, par wo kuch kar nahi paya…. Mere
ghar me aane wala har ek insaan mujhe salah diya karta tha, phhir chahe wo 12th
me third division se hee paas kyun na hua ho…. khair mera dahina hath ab bhi kisi
kaam ka nahi tha isliye maine kal baye hath se hee mutth mara tha aur aaj baye
hath se hee samosa todkar chatni me dalkar yahi sab sochate hue mix kar raha
tha….
“kya Arman bhai, akele-akele..”mere saamne apna muh faad kar khada hote hue
Jaggu ne kaha… jispar maine canteen walo ko ishare se ek aur plate lane ke liye
kaha….
“achchha Haggu, I mean Jaggu…. Ye bata ki yaha kuch hone wala hai kya… wo
Princy aaj kisi function ki baat kar rahi thi…”
“haan, Sharda Enterprises har baras apne andar kaam karne walo ko ek rapchik
party deta hai… ekdum lazwab aur is saal bhi wo party hone wali hai kuch dino
baad… aapko invitation nahi mila kya…”
“achchha hua nahi diya.. main aata bhi nahi”

273
“aao na bhau, mast dhamal karenge…”
“tu kya dhamal karega be, tujhe chay-coffee wali tray pakda denge aur bolenge ja
usko deke aa… wo leke aa. Sale Shri Arman ke sath-sath rahkar apni aukat mat
bhool… chal ja yaha se…”
“aap mazak kar rahe ho na…”
“haan… tujhe kaise pata chala, kya meri acting me koyi kami thi…”
“mujhe pata tha, isiliye maine bura nahi mana…”
“maan bhi leta toh kya ukhad leta…”feeki si muskan ke sath maine samne dekhkar
kaha…. “wo peechhe ladki kaun hai… use aaj se pahle nahi dekha”
“kaun wo… wo princy mam ki dost hai shayad… nahi, wo toh kisi Sharda
Enterprises me hee kaam karne wale kisi bade aadmi ki beti hai, kal hee aayi hai”
“ hot lag reli hai… matlab uske doodh toh utne bade-bade nahi hai aur gand bhi
chaudi nahi hai… lekin achchhi lag rahi hai… iske muh me mutth marunga toh
bahut maza aayega… uska name kya hai”
“setting jamau aapki…”
“ek sher kabhi shikar ke liye kutto ki madad nahi leta….”waha khade hokar maine
kaha “waise tere layak mere paas ek dusara kaam hai, badle main tujhe hazar
rupaye bhi dunga aur tera mobile bf se bhar dunga… bol karega…”
“kyun nahi… par ka kaam hai”
“kabhi ganga-jamuna gaya hai…”
“ek baar gaya tha… ghabrahat me khada hee nahi hua…”
“Daddu ko jaanta hai…”
“nahi…”
“ye le… phhir”apni jeb se ek kagaz nikalkar us kagaz me jis ladki ko Daddu ne mere
saamne mara tha uska address likhkar maine kaha “is address par jakar kahna ki
peechhe likhe number par call kare… is kagaz me full address hai, sath me us
aadmi ka name bhi, jise tujhe ye kahna hai. Yadi khud address dhoondh lega toh
hee us aadmi ke paas jana, yadi address nahi dhoondh paya toh kisi se mat
puchhna… galti se bhi nahi… aur wapas aa jana.chup-chap…”
“aap kyun nahi jate…”
“main jaunga toh koyi notice kar lega… mera matlab maine waha ki ek randi ko
bahut choda phhir paisa nahi diya… main jaunga toh hazar ki jagah dus hazar
ghus jayenge….”
“ho jayega…”
274
“chal phhir, nikal… sham ko milta hoon…”
Mere bhai ke father-in-law…. I mean Pandey ji , mera matlab mere bhai ki biwi ke
papa ke bhai ne ek baar mujhe cigarette peete hue dekh liya tha aur mujhe aakar
ek ghanta lecture diya tha ki mujhe cigarette nahi peeni chahiye… cigarette peene
se dimag kharab hota hai… jispar maine kaha tha ki…. par mere case me ye ulta
tha, main jab-jab cigarette nahi peeta tha ya jab-jab cigarette peene ka gap lamba
hota tab mera dimag kharab hone lagta, jis-se main aksar confuse ho jaya karta ki
main cigarette pee raha hoon ya cigarette mujhe pee rahi hai. ab abhi ke hee
situation ko le lo…. Main apni seat par baitha hua mast bina kisi rok-tok ke kaam
kar raha tha ki meri aankho ne ajeeb-ajeeb harqate shuru kar di… main is samay
apne computer ke saamne baitha tha, lekin mere saamne is samay VR ke cabin ka
scene tha..jaise main sakshat Vandana mam ke cabin me baitha hua hoon… phhir
mujhe Nagpur city ki sadke dikhne lagi, phhir mera flat, phhir Vivek ka clinic,
phhir us raat wala kand jisme maine apni puri raat nadi ke beech-o-beech kaati
thi, phhir VR ko dekhkar usi ke ghar me mutth marne ka karnama …. Matlab
ekdum sequence se, tez gati se meri aankhe haal hee me hui ghatnaye mujhe dikha
rahi thi… mujhe wo scene bhi dikhayi diya, jisme main Vandana Rathi ke chhat se
takrakar lahuluhan hua tha aur wo scene bhi jab maine aur Nisha ne aakhiri baar
sex kiya tha… ye sabhi chize ekdum sequence se ho rahi thi.. kahi koyi uch-neech
nahi thi… phhir mere college ke pictures mere saamne ghoomne lage aur un
pictures me mujhe Esha dikhayi di… jaha mere peechhe jaane ki speed ek-do
seconds ke liye thami aur phhir saye se main wapas peechhe jaane laga… Sidar ki
maut, Gautam ke gundo ke dwara meri thukayi, mere dwara Gautam ki thukayi…
Deepika mam aur meri chudayi, meri ragging… vagerah-vagerah… maine har ek
moments ko mahsoos kiya aur phhir wo scene jaha main basketball ground me
hawa me latke hue basket kar raha tha aur phhir aakhir me mere ghar ka scene,
jaha main sofe me baithkar Charlie Chaplin ki movie The Circus dekh raha tha….
“ye hata na, kya faltu cheeje dekhta rahta tha…”mere hath se remote chheenkar
channel badalte hue Vipin bhaiya ne kaha…
“bhaiya, wo Charlie Chaplin tha…Charlie Chaplin… mera matlab Charlie

Chaplin…”
“toh uska name kyun jap raha hai.. mujhe samajh nahi aata ki logo ne uska itna
havva kyun bana kar rakha hua hai, mujhe toh kuch khas nazar nahi aata… ja ab
yaha se… dimag kharab mat kar”
Aur us din mujhe ek baat samajh aayi ki sirf movie banane ke liye talent nahi
chahiye, balki movie dekhne ke liye bhi talent chahiye aur baki har talent ke sath
ye talent bhi mujhme tha aur mera bada bhai hamesha ki tarah talentless…
Vipin bhaiya ne channel change kiya aur 3-4 saal se chale aa rahe ek serial ko
dekhne me busy ho gaye…..
“in serial walo ki maa ko chod dalu, inki maa ka bhosda… jabran lavde ke baal log
kahani ko kheechte rahte hai, inka madarchod clear hee nahi hota kuch… BC pata
nahi kaha se ek se ek chutiye pakad ke laate hai… mera vash chale toh ek-ek ko
lund fek ke maru….. jhataho ko sharam bhi nahi aati ki kya bana rahe hai…
actor/actress ki toh phhir bhi roji-roti ka sawal hai lekin ye chutiye
275
producer/directors…. kutte sale. Betichod… inke chakkar me aaj phhir The Circus
ka end nahi dekh paunga aur Vipin bhaiya kab se serial dekhne lage… zaroor serial
ki items ko dekhkar raat ko mutth marne ka jugad jama rahe honge… mujhse bol
diya hota toh bf de deta….”tv me chal rahe serial ko kuch der dekhkar maine socha
aur andar aakar school ke liye taiyar hone laga…
Is saal main aakhiri baar school ja raha tha.. phhir pata nahi aage kaun se school
me padhu… waise toh mere pitaji yahi chahte the ki main 12th tak yahi padhu lekin
meri aisi koyi ichchha nahi thi… jispar ghar me already 7-8 baar bahas aur 2-3
baar meri thukayi ho chuki thi… main ab har roj sham ko basketball khelne ek club
me bhi jaya karta tha, jiska virodh mere ghar me mauzood har ek shaks ne kiya…
lekin main nahi mana aur basketball khelne pahuch hee gaya… iska ye matlab
nahi ki cricket mujhe pasand nahi tha, bas maine cricket khelna chhod diya tha…
baki india ke har ek match main aaj bhi utne hee josh me dekhta tha, jitne josh ke
sath pahle dekhta tha… aakhir indian hoon, khoon me cricket toh rahega hee…
national game hockey hua toh kya hua. phhir chahe social media me hazar chutiye
ye kyun na bole ki cricket popular game nahi hai. sirf 8-10 country hee khelti
hai…mera matlab, kya fark padta hai…
.
Kyunki maine decide kiya tha ki aaj ke baad main school ab sirf exam dene
jaunga… wo bhi board exam hai toh center toh dusare school me hee
rahega….isliye maine apne school ke is aakhiri din ko yadgar banana ke liye josh-
josh me Vipin bhaiya ke jeb se bike ki chabhi nikali aur bike lekar chupke se nikal
gaya… mujhe pata tha ki iska nateeza kya hoga, par……kya fark padta hai.
sabse pahle maine goggle lagaya aur full role ke sath bike chalate hue bus-stand
pahucha... maine bus-stand me mazood apne kayi dosto ko red carpet par chalne
wale celebrity ke mafiq hath hilakar hi..hello kaha, jiske baad kayi log mere paas
bhi aaye aur kuch toh mere bike me bhi baith gaye…. Lekin maine un sabki maa-
bahan ko yaad karke unhe utara aur Varun ko bithakar college ke liye nikla…mera
matlab School ke liye.
“wah, Arman aaj toh tune kamal kar diya…jo Vipin bhaiya se bike mangkar le
aaya…”
“madarchod phhir se neutral ho gaya… ye lawda teri jhat jaisi bike chalakar
peechhe gear marne ka adat ho gaya hai…”
“abey isme gear aage lagta hai…”
“sale chup-chap baitha rah…baap ko chodna mat sikha..”
“gadi band ho gayi…bhosdike, kyun bezzati kara raha hai”
“lawde gadi band nahi hui..maine gadi band ki hai, ja-jakar cigarette lekar aa…
phhir tujhe Shweta ke baare me ek baat batata hoon…”
“kaun Shweta, apne class wali…jo isi saal aayi hai..”
“aur nahi toh kya… Shweta mam… jo apne chutiye husband Anish ke sath school
me padhati hai. waise wo bhi isi saal aayi hai, mast maal hai wo bhi… chodne ko

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degi toh chod dunga, lekin… apni taraf se koyi try nahi karunga… mere liye toh
mere class wali Shweta hee kafi hai…. chutiye sale…”
Varun ne cigarette kharida jiske baad main aur Varun waha se ek kopche me
gaye…
“Shweta aur tera kya chal raha hai… kuch hua final”cigarette jalate hue Varun ne
puchha
“main soch raha hoon ki use aaj propose maar du…waise bhi aaj ke baad hum dono
school nahi jayenge… toh yadi wo techares se complain bhi karegi toh kuch nahi
hoga…”
“hum dono nahi…. Sirf tu. Main kal bhi school jaunga aur pagal hai kya, next year
try karna.. ekdum shuru se..”
“main next year yaha nahi padhunga, main kahi bahar jaunga… lawda ab aur
apne gharwalo ko nahi jhel sakta main…”
“badhiya hai…”
“tu bhi chal… mast maza aayega, khali time me ek-dusare ki gand me ungali kara
karenge….mast… ”
“sochta hoon…”
“chal jaldi khatm kar… wo jo naya math ka teacher aaya hai, uski class shuru ho
gayi hogi… BC full sanki hai, mujhe tak chamka diya usne kuch din pahle… pata
nahi kaha se aaya hai…”
“abey dekh uski shadi hue 7 saal ho gaye hai, lekin lawda bachcha nahi ho raha
uski biwi ko, isi khunnas me sabko pelte rahta hai… abhi kal ki baat hai, sirf books
na lane par usne D-Section ke ladke ka dande se maar-maar ke hath suja diya…
rakshas hai BC, full rakshas…”
“is-se achchha toh Bulla class teacher tha… pata nahi sale ka transfer kyun hua
aur ye haivan yaha aa dhamkha…”aakhiri kash markar maine Varun se kaha…..
.
Main apni puri school life me kabhi bike se school nahi gaya tha,isliye aaj ka din
khas na hote hue bhi mere liye khas tha… main aaj first time bike se school gaya
tha aur first time school pahuchne me main late bhi hua tha…
Waise jab tak Bulla sir class teacher the koyi problem nahi hoti thi, lekin jab se
unki jagah ek naya class teacher aaya tha usne pure school me aatank macha
rakha tha, kuch samajhta hee nahi tha BC. Main toh phhir bhi thoda kam dar raha
tha, lekin Arun… mera matlab Varun…Varun ki dar se fat kar char ho gayi thi…
“wo marega be, Arman chal wapas… bhad me gayi teri memories, bhad me gayi
tere school ke aakhiri din ki yaadein…”
“dar kyun raha hai, chal main aage ho jata hoon… ab khush…”Varun ke aage hote
hue maine kaha “ab jo hoga pahle mujhe hoga… tu mera dost hai be… main bahut

277
selfish hoon, main sabke liye kuch nahi karta, par jiske liye karta hoon… sabkuch
karta hoon…”
Maine Varun ko peechhe kiya aur saand ki tarah gusse se chair par baithe apne
class teacher se andar aane ki anumati mangi aur mere anumati magne ke baad
main haste hue peeche muda…
“dekha ,tu khamkha dar raha tha… kuch nahi hua…”

Maine Varun se ye kaha aur itni hee der me mujhe peechhe se kisi ne sar me bahut
tez se mara… itna tez ki jaise laga kisi ne lohe ki rod se mara ho… Varun ki gand
fati aur wo waha se bhag gaya… bhag toh main bhi jata, lekin jab se mere sar me
kisi ne mara tha mujhe kuch soojh hee nahi raha tha… bas main peechhe muda toh
mujhe pata chala ki mere class teacher ne jise humlog saand kahte the usne dande
se mere sar me mara tha… wo bhi isliye kyunki main class aane me 20 minute late
hua tha… wo sand yahi nahi ruka usne mujhe pakad kar class ke andar kheecha
aur back to back thappad markar mera gaal laal karne laga… mera toh pura bheja
hee khisak gaya BC, us dauran mujhe kuch samajh hee nahi aaya ki kya kiya
jaye….
Wo saand mujhe kutto ki tarah latad raha tha aur mere class me mauzood sabhi
ladke chup-chap tamasha dekh rahe the… main unki jagah hota toh aisa bilkul bhi
nahi karta... jabki unme se adhiktar ke liye maine kitni baar ladayi ki thi.. lekin us
samay unme se kisi ne kuch nahi kiya, kisi ne ek shabd kuch bola tak nahi……
napunshak… sale…. that’s why I hate everyone….. everyone including Varun.
Khair, wo saand mujhe bahut der tak maarta raha, usne mujhe saamne ek ladki ki
desk me jhukaya aur marta raha… marta toh main bhi usko..lekin usne mujhe aise
pakad rakha tha ki main apni jagah se hil bhi nahi pa raha tha…. phhir mar khate
hue meri nazar mere saamne baithi ladki ke hath pe gayi.. uske hath me ek pen tha
aur pen dekhte hee maine apni puri taqat laga di sirf apna hath chhudane ke liye…
ki kisi tarah se mere hath me ye pen aa jaye. Lekin aisa nahi hua, mera hath nahi
chhoota aur wo saand mujhe non-stop marta raha… pata nahi us BC ko kya
khunnas thi mujhse, jabki main toh aaj dusari baar hee uska class attend kar raha
tha…
“bahut hoshiyar samajhta hai apne aap ko…huh… le…..le…”mere sar ke baal
pakadkar mera sar ghumate hue usne aakhiri mukka meri peeth me mara aur
phhir mujhe chhod diya…
“ja…jakar baith, apni jagah me… bahut charbi chadh gayi hai tum logo ko”
Aur main ab tak isi soch me tha ki…hua kya.. isne mujhe itni buri tarah kyun peeta,
ye jaante hue bhi ki main is school ke trustee ka beta hoon… upar se jab mera pure
school me itna name chalta ho. matlab maine apne school ke aakhiri din ke liye ye
toh nahi socha tha… par sach toh yahi tha, sach toh yahi tha ki us saand ne mujhe
meri hee class me ek ladki ke bench par jhuka-kar meri thulayi ki thi….
Puri class mujhe dekh rahi thi aur main us ladki ke pen ko… maine apna sar thodi
der ke liye dabaya aur phhir sar ke baal banakar, angadayi lekar us ladki ke hath
se pen kheecha aur kursi me virajman apne class teacher ke shoulder me puri taqat
se pen ghusaya… pen toh sirf thoda sa ghusa lekin use dard itna hua ki wo turant
apna shoulder pakad kar chair se neeche gir gaya…. usne kabhi socha bhi nahi
hoga ki main bhi uspar hamla kar sakta hoon, wo bhi itni jaldi…. Mujhe marne ke
278
baad toh wo waise bhi thaka tha, upar se shoulder me ek baar ghus chuke pen ka
dard…
“tu mujhe mar raha hai, apne teacher ko…”
“bad people need to be punished by worse people”ek aur baar pen uske shoulder me
ghusakar maine kaha… mera nishana utna achchha toh nahi tha ki pahle wale
zakhm me hee pen ghuse… par dard toh usko is baar bhi hua tha. aur phhir maine
teesari baar pen ghusaya….
Itne me class ke kafi ladke mujhe rokne aaye, ladkiya awwww karne lagi… kuch
toh rone bhi lagi…
“kyun be saand…”apna juta nikal kar neeche gire hue teacher ke sar ka bal usi
tarah pakda jis tarah usne mera pakda tha aur uske gaal par back to back jute se
marte hue maine kaha “suna hai teri biwi ko bachcha nahi hota, mere paas bhej
de… ho jayega..”
Jis tarah mujhe mere class teacher ne mara tha, us tarah maine bhi apne class
teacher ko mara… class bhi wahi thi aur classmates bhi… so meri jo izzat pure class
me utri thi use maine wapas pahan liya… nahi…? Mujhe toh yahi lagta hai… baki
background scene me teachers ne mujhe jamkar sunaya… lekin jab maine puri
baat batayi aur gawahi me puri class ko saamne khada kar diya toh us teacher ko
turant school se nikal diya gaya , is farman ke sath ki wo ab is sanstha ke kisi bhi
school me teacher nahi ban payega aur ek baar phhir is kaam me mere aur Varun
ke papa sath the….
Lunch tak me ye pura mamla salat gaya aur school me us pure din shayad yahi
baat chali ki kaise Arman naam ke yugpurush ne ek rakshas ka sanhar kar diya…
bas usi din se maine khud ko Yugpursh ki upadhi se nawaza…
aaj Amarnath sir do class back to back le rahe the… ek lunch ke pahle aur ek lunch
ke baad….
Amarnath sir ne board ke ek sire se lekar dusare sire tak ek line kheechi aur usi line
ke parallel line kheechne me itne vyast ho gaye the ki board me line kheechte-
kheechte wo deewar me line kheechne lage aur phhir deewar me line kheechte-
kheechte class ke bahar hee chale gaye…. lawda, kya kamal the Amarnath Shukla
bhi…
Amarnath sir ke is stunt par puri class hasne lagi ,lekin gate ke saamne baithi do
ladkiya kuch jyada hee khii-khii kar rahi thi… jis par Shukla ji ko bahut ghusa
aaya aur unhone jakar un dono ki choti jod di aur bole…
“kya khhii-khhii laga rakhi hai…tum logo ko jo itni shiddat se padhata hai usi ka
mazak udati ho, abhi pel dunga toh akal thikane aa jayegi…bakchod kahi ki…”
Ye unhone kaha… mujhe pata hai ye believable nahi , par ye unhone kaha bhi aur
humne suna bhi…
Lunch ke baad wali class me unhone padhate waqt khidki se bahar khadi meri bike
dekhi aur class ke taraf apna rookh karke puchha…
279
“ye gadi kiski hai…”
maine hath uthaya…..
“ye gadi nahi…gada hai… ekdum padwa… kitni heavy hai. hum ye gada dekh kar
hee samajh gaye the ki Arman aaya hoga… koyi baat nahi, baitho… toh class, LINE
ka ek aur question main tum sabko padhaunga… par ek chiz yad rakhna, chahe
Physics padho, Math padho ya biology… yadi kisi question me diagram hai toh
pahle theory padhkar, description padhkar diagram yaad karo aur jab diagram
yaad ho jaye toh exam me diagram ki help se theory likh do…. Matlab study time
theory ki madad se diagram banao aur exam me diagram ki madad se theory….
Chize aasan nahi hoti, par unhe aasan banaya ja sakta hai. Aaj ki class yahi khatm
hoti hai……. bye”
.
Mere school me aise kayi teacher the, jo ki antique piece the jaise Amarnath
Shukla, Bulla, wo Saand… sale ek se badhkar ek… full comedian. Khair jab maine
decide kar liya tha ki main is school me agle saal se nahi padhunga toh main us din
apne class me sabko dekh raha tha… mujhe koyi gam nahi tha, school chhodne ka
balki main toh khush tha agle saal se main gharwalo se door aaram se rahunga…
Apne school ke aakhiri din, aakhiri class me maine Shweta ko I love you bolne ka
plan banaya tha… thodi fat bhi rahi thi ki yadi usne mujhe reject kar diya toh meri
izzat ke toh lavde lag jayenge wo bhi aakhiri moment me… phhir is school me aane
wale kya bolenge ki Yugurush Arman , jisne sabkuch kiya… wo ek ladki tak nahi
pata paya, is tarah toh meri gatha aadhoori rah jayegi… kahi log mujhe gay na
samjhe… isliye jo bhi ho mujhe Shweta ko propose karna hee padega… waisi bhi
thodi-bahut line toh deti hee hai..
Maine apni copy se do page fadkar ek me dil banaya aur ek me gulaab aur Shweta
ki taraf jaane ka socha…
“baap re, kitna halla karte ho tum log…”tabhi wild card entry marte hue ek lady
teacher boli “ek toh kuch din baad exam hone wala hai tum logo ka… usme bhi itna
halla…”
“ye behan ki lawdi kaun hai be…”maine Varun se puchha…
“jhat barabar laundo ko padhati hai…”
“nursery walo ko…?”
“hao…”
“toh phhir ye yaha kya kar rahi hai… iski maa ko chodu, ye baith kyun rahi hai…
aise me kaise hoga”
“mujhe kya pata…”
“aise me main Shweta ko propose kaise karunga…”
“tu Shweta ko propose karne wala hai…?”

280
“haan…ye dekh maine dil bhi banaya hai aur red rose bhi…”
“yeeee… aur red rose… sale kariya pen se rose bana kar bolta hai red rose…”
“neeche dekh p.s. karke likha hai…. p.s.red rose”
“aur ye dil hai… mana ki tere paas dil nahi hai, par tujhe toh dil banana bhi nahi
aata”
“lavde, actual dil aise hee rahta hai… jis shape me tum log banate ho na… wo thoda
galat shape hai… mujhe dikhawa pasand nahi… samjha…”
“ja bhai..tu ja.. ye kala dil aur ye kala gulab lekar…”
“haan to jaunga, teri tarah fattu nahi hoon… log misaal dete hai mere naam ki”
Main apni jagah se khada hua aur beech class me, jab wo jhat barabar laundo ko
padhane wali madam class me thi tabhich maine unse permission mangi aur
Shweta ke peechhe wale khali bench me jakar baitha… is beech wo wildcard lekar
entry marne wali madam ne ek taraf se sabka name, unke baap ka name puchhna
chalu kar diya…. nagdi, Sali….
“Name- Shankarshan Tiwari, Father’s name- Shri Ramlal Tiwari…”
“sit down…next”
Main Shweta ke peechhe baitha bahut der tak apne andar himmat jutata
raha…lekin har baar meri himmat dharashayi ho ja rahi thi…
“bolega be, ya aise hee Shweta ke bagal me baithi uski saheli ka pichhwada dekhta
rahega…”
“abey main uski gand nahi dekh raha… matlab dekh raha hoon.. par waise nahi…
main toh beginning line soch raha hoon”
“Shweta…I love you, main tumse bahut pyar karta hoon…itna pyar ki tumhare
pimples bhi mujhe achchhe lagte hai……”
“ ye kaisi line hai, bakwas……”
“ok… make it simple.. Shweta, I like you… main tumse friendship karna chahta
hoon…..”
“ abey bakchod wo toh pahle se hee teri dost hai…”
“arey haan! ye toh bhool hee gaya tha…okayy… Shweta, main tumse fatat le pyar
karta hoon, main tujhe zindagi bhar pelna chahta hoon… tere muh me dena chahta
hoon … tera muh me lena chahta hoon… bole toh 69. ye sahi rahega… ekdum
killer… The ARman Style”
281
“sahi hai…”
“lawda sahi hai…”
“kuch soch phhir…”
“sochta hoon… par kitni kamal ki baat hai ki is baar teeno version past me transfer
hue hai… ”
Is beech jhat barabar laundo ko padhane wali madam lagatar sabse unka name,
unke baap ka name puchhte ja rahi thi… waise us chiz me kuch khas naya nahi tha
lekin ek shabd tha jo bar-bar mere dimag me strike karta tha… wo shabd tha
“Shree”
Aksar ladke apne baap ke name ke saamne Shree…Dr…. , Er…. Mr. prefix jod rahe
the… par mujhe ye Shree word kuch jyada hee achchha laga. maine ye pahle bhi
suna tha lekin ispar dhyan aaj diya tha… mujhe ye word kafi acha lag raha tha…
main toh hamesha apne baap ke name ke saamne Mr. lagata tha… khair maine
Shweta ko propose karne ke apne plan pe dhyan diya lekin jab-jab koyi ye word
use karta mere dimag me wo word kafi der tak ghoomta rahta…..
“Shweta, seriously… I love you, mujhe tumse teesari nazar me hee pyar ho gaya
tha…”
“teesari nazar… pahli nazar bol…”
“jo sach hai, wo sach hai… ab teesari nazar me pyar hua toh main jhooth kyun bolu
ki pahli nazar me hua…. Honesty bhi koyi chiz hoti hai ya nahi… Arman koyi
dikhawa nahi karta…”
“achchha phhir… gand mara…”
“wo toh main marunga… iski, jo mere saamne baithi hai…”
Maine kayi aur lines sochi , bahut tarike soche lekin kuch jam nahi raha tha… main
khud me hee abhi ulajh chuka tha aur idhar mere school ke aakhiri din ki aakhiri
class khatm hone ke kagar par thi…
Yadi koyi mujhe puri class me khade hokar madarchod bolne ke liye bole toh main
bejhijhak bol dunga… yaha tak ki samne desk par khade hokar apna lund bhi dikha
dunga lekin ye ‘I love you’ word mann me sochte hee mera dil jor se dhadakne lagta
tha… matlab, kitni kamal ki baat hai na… khair… jab main bahut der tak kuch nahi
bol paya toh apni aur Shweta ki kahani ko yahi khatm karke wapas apni seat par
jaane ka socha… is khayal ke sath ki kya Shweta kabhi jaan payegi ki main us din
use waha propose karne ke irade se gaya tha….. nahi… use toh ye yaad bhi nahi
rahega aur mujhe…….
Par usi samay jaise ek chamatkar hua aur jab maine Shweta ko bina kuch kahe
waha se jaane ki thaan li toh wo khud peechhe mudi aur thoda muskurate hue,
thoda sharmate hue, thoda ghabrate hue mere hath me jaldi se se ek kagaz pakda
di…
282
“iski maa ka… ye kya tha be…”Shweta ke dwara mere hath me pakdaye kagaz ko
dekh maine khud se kaha “ love letter… ? ya phhir physics ka koyi hard
numerical…? Love letter hee hoga… love letter… yani meri gatha complete…
yeeesss… Shweta weds Arman… par lead role me toh main hoon isliye , Arman
weds Shweta”
Maine bade utsah ke sath Shweta ka wo letter khola jo baad me love letter nikla…
jiske andar usne apna pura dil kholkar rakh diya tha… uski writing bhi mujhse
achchhi thi… khaskar ke uske A aur S banane ka tarika… us letter me usne 13 baar
mujhe I love you kaha tha…. jisme se 10 baar usne Arman ki jagah Armaan likha
tha.
Armaan…A-r-m-a-a-n… seriously, koyi itna irresponsible kaise ho sakta hai… wo

bhi mere name ko lekar….
“ye kya hai…”gusse se dheemi aawaz me maine Shweta se puchha… jispar wo

muskara uthi…
“Shweta, tujhe main propose karne ka soch raha tha aur isiliye main yaha aaya
tha… lekin tune mujhe kyun propose kiya… kya tere maa-baap ne tujhe manners
nahi sikhaye… kyun maa-baap ka name barbaad kar rahi hai… main tujhe patata
aur tu pat jati toh wo thik tha, lekin tune mujhe kyun propose mara…? aaj ke baad
mujhse kabhi baat karna… I hate you…”
“kya fark padta hai…”thoda gusse se Esha boli…. Mera matlab Shweta. Sala aaj
teeno version transfer hue hai toh dikkat ho rahi hai…
“tumhara dimag toh sahi hai…. tum mujhe I love bolo ya main tumhe I love you
kahu… kya fark padta hai”
Bina kuch bole main waha se utha aur bagal wali column me jo ek ladka baitha tha
uske sath baith gaya… Shweta mere jawab se kafi udas ho gayi thi, lekin maine iski
koyi parvaah nahi ki… idhar dusari taraf wild entry lene wali madam ab bhi
name.. baap ka name puchhne me lagi thi aur do ladko ke baad mera number tha…
“my name is Anuj Singh and my father is Dr. Pankaj Singh..”
“sit down…next”
“my name is gopichand kushwaha and my father’s name is Shri Rajendra

kushwaha..”
“next…”
Aur phhir main khada hua aur maine apna name bola…
“Shri Arman….”
Ye apne aap hee hua tha, mere name ke aage maine anjaane me hee Shri jod diya
tha aur is tarah maine ek hee din me khud ko Yugpurush ke sath-sath Shri ki bhi
upadhi de di thi……
283
School se wapas ghar jate waqt main aur Varun wapas apne adde par cigarette
peene gaye…. Jaha Varun ne mujhse kaha
“ye saal bhi khatm… tu pakka ab school me nahi padhega…”
“done…”
“aur tere gharwale nahi mane toh.. tere school ki fees toh wahi denge na…”
“collector’s scholarship… jo bhi board exams me district me top 2 me rahega uski

state ke kisi bhi school me free me padhayi hogi… bas ek baar top 2 me aa jaun
phhir dekh tu… main toh bolta hoon tu bhi chal… mere sath… maine toh school bhi
soch liya hai… Sharda Vihar, Bhopal. mast school hai aur waha padhayi ke sath-
sath sports me bhi dhyan dete hai… last year 32 students national khelne gaye the
waha se aur 4 indian camp… waha aise-aise games ke coach hai jin games ka
maine aaj tak name tak nahi suna… matlab ekdum perfect jagah hai… ”
“nahi… main nahi jaunga…”
“kyun… main rahunga na tere sath…”
“mera toh bahut mann hai lekin gharwale nahi manenge…”
Jispar maine pura dum lagakar ek kash mara jiske karan mujhe khasi bhi aane
lagi… par main nahi ruka aur khaste hue bola…
“look…if you really want to do something, then do it. Don’t waste your time on
someone ‘s opinion .not even on your parents. Isliye main bolta hoon chal… kya
karega in chutiyo ke sath… waha tu mere sath rahega…. Arman ke sath… Shri
Arman ke sath…”
“isi liye toh nahi jaunga…”
“kya matlab…”ek aur lamba kash markar maine puchha…
“dekh ab tu us school me jayega, top marega… sports me medals leke aayega… har
tarah ke competitions me participate karega aur phhir se medals, trophies vagerah
layega… aur main…? Sab log mera ,tujhse compare karenge… bolenge ki Arman ko
dekho kitna tez hai aur Varun kitna bhondu hai… kayi log toh abhi se hee yahi
bolte hai… main bahut jealous feel karta hoon tujhse ki bhagwan ne sab kuch tujhe
kyun diya, BC ek bhi talent nahi hai mere andar aur tu chahta hai ki main tujhe
aur jhelu… aur do saal teri kamyabi se jalu… sorry, par main nahi jaane wala…
tere sath toh bilkul bhi nahi aur jo subject tu lega, wo bhi main nahi lunga… warna
phhir se mere gharwale tujhse comparison karke mujhe taana marenge….”
Ye sunkar main muskuraya aur bas muskuraya… kyunki aur kuch toh tha hee nahi
kahne ko….. wo jagah thi aur wo samay tha, jab maine nakli muskan ki kala
seekhi… mera mann toh kiya ki main Varun ko wahi chhod du lekin maine kuch
nahi kaha aur muskurate hue use bike me baithne ka ishara kiya… maine
muskurate hue bike start ki aur muskurate hue hee bike sadak par dauda di……
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“so this is our last ride…”bike ki speed tez karte hue chillakar maine puchha
“kya bola…kuch sunayi nahi diya…”
“main bol raha tha ki… ye humari last ride hai shayad… ek sath…”
“haaaan…”
“kya bolta hai, speed badhau…”
“badha de…”
“le phhir….”
bolkar Maine clutch dabakar pel ke accelerator mashak diya, jis-se bike speed me
toh nahi gayi par itni tez aawaz hui ki waha aas-paas mauzood logo ke kaan ke
parde fat gaye….. hahaha…sale madarchod…
Phhir maine clutch chhoda aur ahiste-ahiste bike ko speed me lane laga… main
mast bike chala raha tha, bole toh full enjoyment aur usi waqt ek aisa samay aaya
jab bike ki speed apne aap dheemi hone lagi, bike ki aawaz apne aap kam hone lagi
jabki maine accelerator pel ke daba rakha tha upar se petrol bhi full tha… maine
aas-paas dekha aur mahsoos kiya mujhe ab na toh hawa ki sarsarahat sunayi de
rahi hai aur na hee meri peeth thok kar mujhpar chillate Varun ki koyi aawaz aur
ek baar phhir se wo hua, jo thodi der pahle hua tha…. jab main Sharda Enterprises
me baitha hua tha… mere aankho ke saamne phhir se meri zindagi ki tasvire
nachne lagi… bas fark sirf itna tha ki last time sequence backward tha lekin abki
baar sequence forward tha…. jaise ki main future dekh raha hoon… mujhe phhir
kuch seconds ke liye Arun dikha, phhir Kuch seconds ke liye Esha dikhi… jinhe
dekhkar maine bike me peechhe baithe Varun se kaha….
“Varun jaldi-jaldi me ek baat toh bolna bhool hee gaya…. tu ek baat hamesha yaad
rakhna…”
“kya….”(ye usne kaha hoga)
“ Sonam ki maa ka bhosda…”
Waqt badla, scene badla, log badle aur jo nahi badla wo tha main…. jab main
wapas present me aaya toh apne dimag me ek sawal liye turant apne kaam me lag
gaya… aur wo sawal tha….“why god created the humans….”
Mera dimag ab bhi thodi-thodi purani yaado me ghoom raha tha, upar se wo sawal
ki…bhagwan ne hume kyun banaya lekin phhir bhi maine computer screen par
nazar gadayi aur fata-fat apna kaam niptane laga… MTL
Shweta se us din ke baad main kabhi nahi mila.. yaha tak ke exams me bhi nahi.
isliye main exactly nahi bata sakta ki mere baare me uski ray kya rahi hogi aur
abhi kya hai... par ek baar facebook me uski id dikhi thi mujhe tab maine mazak-

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mazak me 'hello' likhkar bheja tha use, jiske baad usne bhi same reply kiya tha par
phhir maine kaha ki...
"tu wahi laundiya hai na jise maine kayi saal pahle reject karke behan-zoned kar
diya tha...haha"
jiske baad usne mujhe turant block kar diya aur shayad aaj tak block karke rakhi
hui hai... shayad unblock bhi kar diya ho... mujhe nahi pata. waise bhi ab kya fark
padta hai...
“tum, kya name hai tumhara… tum.. kya samajhte ho tum khud ko…”mere kaan ke
paas aakar ek ladki chillate hue boli…
Jispar maine apna kaan pen se khujaya aur us chillane wali ladki ko dekha… ye
toh wahi ladki thi jise maine canteen me dekha tha aur Jagat se iske khoobsurati ki
tareef bhi ki thi… lekin ye mujhpar kyun chilla rahi hai, ise toh main jaanta tak
nahi…. kahi ye meri fan toh nahi, jisko maine reply na diya ho aur ye is baat se
bhadak gayi ho....
“tumne kya kaha mere bare me… haan… tum khud ko samajhte kya ho… kya aise
hee apni maa-bahan ke baare me bhi dusaro se baat karte ho… what is your
problem…”
“the problem is we don’t want problems but problems want us… now tell me, what’s
your problem”dusare wale kaan ko pen se khujate hue maine kaha...
“kya… kya matlab tumhara… tumne us Jagat se kya kaha ki tum mujhe pasand
karte ho… apni bahan ke liye bhi tum aisa hee bologe…”
“pahli baat…meri koyi bahan hee nahi hai, isliye main us chiz ki toh baat hee nahi
karunga aur rahi dusari baat toh…kya har khoobsurat ladki ke paas dimag nahi
hota except Angelina… maine kya kaha Jaggu se…? sirf yahi kaha ki wo ladki jo
waha baithi hai wo kafi khoobsurat hai… bas itna hee....”
“toh tumne mere baare me kaha kyun…”
“mera muh... mere shabd aur freedom of speech… isliye... ab chal ja yaha se…socha
tha tujhe pataunga ,lekin tu bhi…”
“tumhari himmat kaise hui ye bolne ki…”
“tu ja na bahan… ab khush ya rakhi baandh kar jayegi…”
“sorry bolo…”
“ja nahi bolta sorry, jo ukhadna ho ukhad le…”
“main bolti hoon sorry bolo….”

286
“teri….”gusse se khade hote hue maine kaha “tujhe bola na jaane ke liye..chal ja
yaha se, warna ek mukka marunga toh ek mahine tak dard dega… nahi ye purana
ho gaya… ok…again… chal nikal, warna ek jhapad me jhad jayegi”
“tumhari himmat kaise hui Shivakant Sehgal ki beti se aise baat karne ki, mere
papa Shivakant Sehgal…. General Manager hai, sharda enterprises ke….”
“toh…”
“toh…main tumhe naukri se nikalwa dungi…”
“toh…”
“toh… main tumpe maanhani ka case kar dungi…”
“tu jati ya nahi yaha se…”
“pahle sorry bolo”
“sorry… ab ja, jakar mar ja……..pura dimag ki maa-bahan kar di…”
“no problem, bye… compliment ke liye thanks”haskar waha se jaate hue wo

Shivakant Sehgal ki laundiya boli…
“ajeeb gandu laundi hai, lawda….. itna dimag khane ke baad bolti hai ki no
problem, bye…. why the hell god created us…”
Chapter-28: The Wedding Reception
jyada bimar hone ka ek fayda ye hai ki aapko kuch bhi acha nahi lagta….i mean
choot… chuttad… various kind of chutiyapa. sab aadmi ke liye bejaan hote hai…
aur wo samay hota hai jab ek insaan apni zindagi me mahan hota hai… example ke
taur par mujhe dekh lo main na jaane kitne saalo se bimar hoon aur isiliye main
mahan hoon…. Main puri raat khud ke, khud ke future ke baare me sochta hoon
par mujhe yahi lagta hai ki main kuch nahi soch raha….. ab isi samay ko hee le lo…
main kuch soch raha hoon lekin mujhe aisa lag raha hai ki main kuch nahi soch
raha…
“guns kaha deliver karne hai…”Daddu ne mujhse puchha…
“abhi time kya hua hai…”
“ saat bees”
“isi samay, saat din baad…char alag-alag jagah, Haryana me…Delivery kaise
karoge… ”
“25-25 guns ki char potli banakar ek potli phal ke truck me, ek potli ambulance me,
ek potli shadi ke liye Haryana ja rahe ek family ke saman ke sath aur ek…. Bike me
mere aadmi leke jayenge…”

287
Paiso ka bag nikalkar maine Daddu ke saamne rakha, jisme maine wahi note
rakhe the jo maine us ambulance se loota tha…
“isme toh sirf 7 laakh hai…..”
“ye jewellery….”ek aur bag Daddu ki table par rakhkar main muskuraya “aadha
abhi, baki delivery time. Haryana me jin char jagah par tumhe maal pahuchana
hai uska address main tumhe nahi dunga, bas main tumhare aadmiyo ko root
bataunga aur wo usko follow karenge…. Police ka khatra nahi chahiye apun ko.”
“khatarnak…”paiso ke sath jwellery table par apni taraf kheech-kar Daddu bola
“khatarnak… ekdum full planning ke sath. Ekdum…. Kya bolte hai usko angrezi
me…… I like you… ajmeri ke kothe ki jo randi chahiye wo le lo aaj… apun ki taraf se
tohfa….”
“sach…”
“Daddu ki jubaan hai…”
“thik hai phhir..”aankho me ho rahi jalan ko shant karne ke liye apni aankho ko
mijte hue maine kaha“Ajmeri chahiye…. Milegi ?”
Mere itna bolte hee Daddu aur waha mauzood uske sabhi aadmiyo ki chok ho
gayi.. chok toh meri bhi hui par main normal hee bana raha… kyunki Daddu ab
kar bhi kya sakta tha, usne mujhe jubaan di thi… upar se thahra paiso ka
lalchi…usne ek baar paiso ki taraf dekha aur phhir haan kar diya.
“lekin aaj nahi… kal.. kal raat me….”
“aaj kyun nahi..”
“samjha karo Daddu bhai, already subah se do baar ho chuka hai….. ”
“hihihihi…I like you”
“I like you too….Daddu bhai, aapne us din kya mara us laundiya ko… sala idhar se
belt, udhar se danda…phhir rape. Matlab maza aa gaya dekh ke… full enjoyment…
main toh aapka fan ho gaya us din se… aapke sath ek photo lena magta apun ko,
bole toh yun bindas style me aur ek autograph bhi… aapki photo ko apun frame
karake apne ghar ki deewar pe latyega aur bade-bade aksharo me likhwayega ki…
ye hai DD- Diler Daddu…”
“aur uske neeche Ganga-Jamuna ka baadshah bhi likhwana…”
“bilkul…”
Daddu ke sath selfie lekar aur ek mude hue paper me Daddu ka autograph ke sath
ek katta lekar main waha se nikal gaya….
.
.

288
Har din main khud se do jhooth zaroor bolta hoon… pahla subah me… ki… aaj ka
din achchha hoga aur dusara raat me ki….aaj ka din achchha raha…. Baki kuch
achchha hota toh nahi phhir bhi main har din ye repeat karte rahta hoon…
Aaj subah bhi jab main 2 ghante ki lambi neend lekar utha toh khud se kaha ki…
aaj ka din achchha hoga aur apna bag lekar A-3 ki taraf badha. Remember, A-3…?
mera purana ghar… jaha main ek saal se bhi adhik samay tak raha tha. waise
maine jis din David ko A-3 me pela tha, usi din soch liya tha ki ab main un sabki
shakl tak kabhi nahi dekhunga… lekin ek chiz jo mere dimag me har din ghoomte
rahti thi wo ye ki jis dost ne itne mushqil samay me mere sath diya, maine uski hee
insult ki… uske hone wali biwi ki insult ki… ye sahi nahi tha. mana ki maine
bachpan me Varun par bahut se ahsaan kiye the, lekin yadi main wo ahsaan nahi
bhi karta toh bhi Varun ka kuch jyada nuksaan nahi hota… wo kisi na kisi tarah
situation handle kar hee leta… lekin main… main ye nahi kar sakta tha, meri
zindagi college ke sath hee khatm ho chuki thi, mere dost ke sath-sath mere
gharwalo ne bhi mera sath chhod diya tha… us waqt Varun hee ekmatra tha, jisne
meri emotionally aur economically bahut help ki thi… isliye mujhe uske ahsaano
ka badla toh chukana hee tha aur pichhale dino raat bhar nadi ke beech bitane ke
baad mujhe khayal aaya ki aise toh main kabhi bhi tapak sakta hoon toh kyun na
Varun se aakhiri mulaqat kar li jaye… isiliye main yaha tha. Flat number A-3 ke
saamne….
A-3 pahuchkar maine gate knock kiya…
“kamal hai 5 minute ho gaye, sale ne gate nahi khola… zaroor sonam ke sath
chudayi machayi hogi kal raat me aur abhi kapde pahan raha hoga…”jab Varun ne
gate nahi khola toh maine anuman lagaya…
Is beech A-3 se judi meri kayi yaade taaza hone lagi… jinhe rok-kar maine ek aur
baar darwaja knock kiya….
“kya hai yar, koyi izzat hee nahi hai.... abhi batata hoon…”bolkar main thoda
peechhe gaya par usi samay Varun ne gate khola… towel pahankar
“achchha hua, jo gate khol diya…warna main todne wala tha…”
“Arman tuuu.. yahaaaa”
“itna chauk kyun raha hai… main yaha rahne nahi aaya hoon, don’t worry…”gate
ki taraf badhte hue main bola… lekin tabhi Varun ne mujhe rok liya
“tu andar nahi ja sakta…”
“kyun Sonam bhi hai kya andar…”
“haan, par wo baat nahi hai… tu abhi andar nahi jayega…”
“kya hua… tu mujhe rok kyun raha hai…”
“rook na be, itna hadbada kyun raha hai…”
“ab samjha…main… ki tu kyun mujhe andar nahi aane de raha, bole toh batau…”

289
“nahi…”
“batane de na… please”
“nahi… Arman nahi…”
“tune Sonam ke sath raat bhar chudai ki…”
“Arman…chup ho ja…”
“aur phhir thukam-thukayi karne ke baad tum dono thak-kar aise hee so gaye,
jiske baad tum dono ki neend abhi mere gate knock karne pe khuli hai… tabhi toh
tu towel lapet ke aaya hai…”
“aur kuch bolna hai…”peechhe mudkar Varun ne dekhte hue kaha…
“hat na… mujhe bhi dekhna hai…”
“tu mera lund dekh… bhosdiwale… jiska dekhna tha , uska toh dekha nahi… ab
koyi aur dekh raha hai uska…”
“Nisha…. ? Itni jaldi David se set ho gayi… Sali chhinar… mujhe toh uspe shuru se
hee shaq tha… achchha hua jo chhod diya usko… warna wo apne ghar me apne
maa-baap ke saamne David se chudwate rahti aur main idhar khali mutth marte
rahta, sale in**sts… tujhe pata hai breakup se kayi mahine pahle usne mujhe choot
tak nahi dikhayi.. jabki main har hafte kisi na kisi bahane kaise bhi karke use apna
lund dikhata tha… jab wo yaha aati ya jab main kahi uske sath ghoomne jata toh
main use ishare bhi karta ki wo mujhe dikhaye… jis par wo bolti ki… ‘Arman, meri
koyi izzat hai ya nahi, tumne mujhe samajh kya rakha hai’… wah bc… jaise mere
lund ki koyi izzat hee nahi…”
“Varun, kaun hai gate par… zara andar aana toh, aur ye kal raat wale bartan
tumne abhi tak nahi dhoye….”andar se ek auratjaat ki aawaz aayi aur is aawaz ke
aate hee Varun ne mujhe andar aane diya….
“ja…ja bartan dhokar, phhir baat karte hai…”
Varun ke waha se andar jaane ke baad maine pure flat ko dekha… flat ka toh pura
look hee change ho gaya tha… deeware phhir se paint karayi gayi thi, kayi sare
frames vagerah lagaye gaye the aur kayi naye saman bhi Varun laya tha… jaise
naya sofa… maine apna bag ek taraf feka aur shoes pahankar hee sofe me kooda…
phhir maine table me iphone dekha, jise dekhkar ek pal ko mujhe khayal aaya ki
main wo iphone pel doon…. Khair maine apna wo plan drop kiya aur apne joote se
ragad-ragad kar sofe ko saaf karne laga…. mera matlab joote ko saaf karne laga.
“kaisa hai tu aur kaha rahta hai aajkal…”apna hath towel se pochhate hue Varun
ne puchha…
“Nehru chauk ke paas…”

290
“toh…kaise aana hua…”sofe me ek taraf baithkar Varun ne puchha
“tu jaisa soch raha hai, waisa nahi hai hai… main tujhse paise magne nahi aaya…
balki dene aaya hoon”
“ye tune kiya… ye sofa tune ganda kiya abhi aur tu…tu shoes pahan kar sofe me
baitha hai… neeche kar jaldi, warna Sonam dekhegi toh…”
“toh…”
“toh kuch nahi…”apna sar dabate hue usne kaha “tujhe samajhna itna mushqil
kyun hai… tu us din toh aise gaya tha jaise kabhi laut kar nahi aayega aur phhir
aaj aa gaya….”
“main toh ek khuli kitab ki tarah hoon dost, par mujhe sirf padho mat...mujhe
samjho. Physics ke concept ki tarah… deeper you go, deeper I become… anyway”
“I hate physics…”
“kya fark padta hai… par dobara mat bolna ”
“thik hai… nahi bolunga… lekin tu jo sochkar yaha aaya hai, wo ab nahi ho sakta…
tu chahe jitna bol le lekin mujhe maloom hai ki tu yaha rahne aaya hai… lekin
bhai, I’m sorry… ab ye nahi ho sakta… tune mujhme ahsaan kiye the, maine tujhpe
kiye… baat khatm aur jaldi se jaldi yaha se jaa… Sonam abhi bathroom me hai,
maine use bataya hai ki mere office ka ek dost aaya hua hai….”
“tu aise kyun hadbada raha hai… ”
“aise kyun hadbada raha hoon…? meri Sonam se engagement ho chuki hai… kuch
mahino baad shadi hone wali hai… hum dono sath rahte hai aur wo is duniya me
sirf ek hee shaks se nafrat karti hai wo hai tu… kyunki us din tune raat me uske
sath bahut galat kiya….”
“bahut galat kiya…? Aisa kya kiya tha maine…”dimag par jor dalkar maine
socha…
((“tumhari himmat kaise hui…”tarrate hue Sonam mere paas aayi aur mujhe
marne ke liye apna hath uthane hee wali thi ki maine uska hath pakda aur uthakar
Varun ki taraf fek diya….
“ab ye mujhe chodna sikhayenge… Friendynamic ke law ne mere hath baandh

rakhe hai warna main tujhe achchhe se batata ki meri himmat kaise hui… randi
Sali… paise lekar lund choosne wali… tujhse toh main baad me niptunga.. tu rook
do minute abhi”))
“Bad need to be punished by worse… i mean, I was just entertaining the god…yahi
niyati hai, mere bhai”
“chhod usko.... waise tere peechhe bahut kand hua idhar… par teri shakl ko kya
hua aur tera hath… bend kaise ho gaya”

291
“kya batau, ek din josh me itni jor se mutth mara ki hath hee bend ho gaya… waise
tu kisi kand ki baat kar raha tha..”
“David ne police case kar diya tha, tere naam pe aur police mujhse puchh-tachh
karne bhi aayi thi… mujhse unhone tere ghar ka address bhi manga tha…”
“phhir…”do cigarette muh me fasate hue maine puchha… jispar Varun naraz ho
gaya...
"tujhe peena hai toh pee, main nahi piunga..."
"abey main khud ke liye hee do cigarette jala raha hoon... ek version 2.0 ke liye aur
ek khud ke liye... right wali cigarette main piyunga aur left wali, 2.0... khair chhod
tu, ye sab teri samajh me nahi aayega... ye sab psychological baate hai... tu aage
bata, phhir kya hua..."
“phhir kya… phhir maine Sonam aur Nisha ke jariye kaise bhi karke David ko case
wapas lene ke liye mana liya aur ek baat tere bhai ki shadi ho chuki hai aur wo
dono 6 mahine pahle USA shift ho chuke hai… dono matlab ek tera bhai aur
dusari…”
“Pandey ji ki laundiya, yani meri bhabhi… good aur mere mom-dad…”
“last month wo bhi gaye … pahle kuch problem tha builder ke license ka…”
“toh license mil gaya… wow… mera baap toh full rahis ho jayega phhir…. Sala ,
yadi mere paas itna paisa hota toh roj ladkiyo ko nanga karwake mutth marta….
Koyi aur khabar”
“tu pahle mujhe ek baat bata, wo tujhse itni nafrat kyun karte hai… aise-kaise koyi
apne aaulad ko chhod sakta hai… tune aakhir kiya kya tha ghar me”
“kiya kya tha…? thik se toh yaad nahi… rook thodi der…”bolkar maine apne dimag
me jor dala…
((“hi Arun… Esha aayi hai kya college”
“areyy hatt lawda…”
Abey… Ye toh main college pahuch gaya… 2.0 , thoda daba ke gadi aage le… ghar
pahucha… haan, bas..bas… bas yahi rok… ye pahucha main family episode me...
“sun be, ab main chhota nahi raha jo jab jee aaye pelte rahoge… munda kharab
hua na toh main maiyya chod dunga tum sabki…”))
“oh teri… ye sab hua tha… baap re”wapas present me aate hue maine khud se
kaha..
“kya… hua tha..”
“kuch nahi… kuch khas nahi… tu suna… koyi aur khabar”

292
“Nisha ki shadi ho gayi… last week”
“kamal hai… River View Colony me toh koyi jashn hee nahi tha…”
“hota bhi toh tujhe kaise pata chalta, tu toh Nehru chauk ke paas rahta hai na…?”
“oh haan, sala abhi tak yahi address yaad hai…”
“reception do din ke baad ka hai… Nisha ne kaha tha ki yadi mera tujhse koyi
contact ho toh main tujhe reception me aane ke liye invite kar du…”
“aur tune kar diya… bakchod. Abey, wo mere maze lene ki koshish kar rahi hai aur
tu… zindagi bhar lanth hee rahega tu…”
“tu shayad thik se samjha nahi…. Main bhi tere maje hee le raha hoon… kitne paise
chahiye tujhe…bol…. main dunga, lekin utni baar tujhe Sonam se sorry bolna
padega”
Update-100*
Quote:
“aur tune kar diya… bakchod. Abey, wo mere maze lene ki koshish kar rahi hai aur
tu… zindagi bhar lanth hee rahega tu…”
“tu shayad thik se samjha nahi…. Main bhi tere maje hee le raha hoon… kitne paise
chahiye tujhe…bol…. main dunga, lekin utni baar tujhe Sonam se sorry bolna
padega”
Varun ki last line sunkar maine uski taraf dekha… matlab dekh toh pahle bhi raha
tha par is baar thoda dum lagakar dekha, muskuraya aur khamosh hee raha…
yaha aane se pahle toh maine socha tha ki purane yaar itne dino baad milenge toh
sare gile-shikawe door ho jayenge… lekin shayad mere karam hee aise the jise
bhulaya nahi ja sakta…
“ye toh mere hee maje lene lag gaya… main maje lene me aaunga toh phhir….
Anyway, chhote logo ke kya muh lagna….”
Isliye main sofe se utha aur bistar me pade apne bag ko uthakar wapas sofe me
baitha…shoes pahankar
“maine pura hisab kiya hai tera…”apne bag se noto ki gaddi nikalkar Varun ke
hath me dete hue kaha “1,46,000 ke around tune mujhpe ahsaan kiya tha… ye
pure dedh laakh hai, aish kar…”
“dedh lakh, kama liya tune…itni jaldi, chori karne laga kya… waise bhi aajkal
Nagpur me loot-maar jyada ho rahi hai, kuch din pahle ki baat hai kisi ne
ambulance ko hee loot liya aur us ambulance me jo patient tha wo paise na hone ki
vazah se hospital walo ne use admit hee nahi kiya aur wo mar gaya…. kahi wahi
note toh nahi hai na ye… warna pakda jaunga… sach bata kaha se laya…”haste
hue Varun ne puchha… lekin use zara bhi andaza nahi tha ki mazak-mazak me wo
sach bol raha tha…. siway iske ki…ki wo note wo nahi the jo maine ambulance se
paar kiya tha, ambulance wale sare rupaye toh main Daddu ko dekar aaya tha…
“tere baap se lekar aaya hoon ye paise… chup-chap le le…”

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“dedh lakh… isme tune apne mobile ka bill joda kya, jo maine tujhe tere birthday
pe gift diya tha… 30,000 ka tha… ab jab ahsaan chukka raha hai toh pure ahsaan
chuka de… warna tujhpe bojh rahega…”
Maine apne bag me nazar dali… bag me ab sirf pachas hazar hee the…. Main kuch
der tak apne bag me hee dekhta raha, jis par Varun ne taana marte hue kaha…
“kya hua engineer saab, bag khali ho gaya kya…. koyi nahi, Sonam ki taraf se
ahsaan maan ke rakh le….”
“ye le, soot samet pachas diya… tu bhi kya yaad rakhega……..lawda..”
Pura bag khali karne ke baad main waha se jaane ke liye utha aur tabhi peechhe se
tantanate hue Sonam aayi…
“Varun, ye yaha kya kar raha hai… is wahiyat insaan ko yaha se bahar karo,
jaldi…isi waqt…”
“chup be… bhool gayi kya itni jaldi ”
“whattt…. You……… mean….”
“I mean…. I don’t care if you are my best friend’s slut or my best friend’s wife… I
hate you and I’ll always do.”
“Arman , tu jaa yaha se aur aaj ke bad yaha mat aana…”kisi anhoni ki aashanka se
Varun ne kaha
Main waha se jaane laga, lekin gate par pahuchkar mujhe kuch achchha nahi laga
mera matlab kaha main aur kaha ye… main peechhe palta aur Varun se bola…
“Varun… main soch raha tha ki yadi us din maine Gaurav ko nahi mara hota toh
wo teri behan ko aur tere khandan ki izzat ko aur kitna chodta… mujhe us din
school me Gaurav ko nahi marna chahiye tha… wo teri behan ko itna chodta ki wo
pregnant ho jati aur phhir tere lawde se latak kar jhool jati, galti actually Gaurav
ki nahi thi… teri lund ki pyasi behan ki thi, jisne Gaurav ko seduce kiya hoga phhir
uchak-uchak kar Gaurav se gand marwayi hogi… jaise ye Sonam marwati hai aur
tera wo maha chutiya bhai, gandu jo college me ek ladki ke peechhe gand marwa
ke suicide karne chala tha….sala chodu, mujhe use bhi marne dena chahiye tha…
ab jab ahsaan chukane ki baat ho rahi hai toh yadi waqt mile toh iske baare me
sochna… ya phhir meri bheekh samajh ke rakh lena… waise bhi meri bheekh pe hee
jeeta tha tu… warna School me Reema ke honth chatna toh door tu uske jhat ka
baal bhi nahi chat pata… achchha mara, lawda tumsabko ko us din… bahut udd
rahe the betichod… baitha diya… hahaha… maza aa gaya behanchod… is Sonam ko
toh choot pakad kar uthake feka tha… jhatahi , Sali, randi, chhinar, kutiya,
bhosdiwali…nagdi kahi ki… mujhe milna mat tu kahi bahar, warna dayi chod
dunga teri main… hattt madarchod, teri pure pariwar….”
“aaj toh main tujhe zinda nahi chhodunga…rook tu..”bagal me rakhi hockey stick
uthakar meri taraf badhte hue Varun gusse se cheekha…
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“na munna na… baap se panga nahi lete, peechhe chal…”bag se katta nikalkar
maine kaha aur bina koyi deri kiye Varun ko pel diya… ek goli uske mathe me aur
ek uske seene me….
Sonam ki toh gand fat gayi… wo jaha thi.. wahi khadi rahi… mera matlab koyi
action nahi, koyi reaction nahi… yaha tak ki Varun bhi jaisa tha, waise hee tha…
mere goli marne ke baad wo neeche gir raha tha… par ab wo beech hawa me atak
gaya tha… uska khoon jo uske sharir se nikal kar neeche gir raha tha…wo bhi
hawa me hee rooka hua tha… phhir maine khud ko dekha… main bhi un dono ki
tarah atak kar raha gaya tha… bas meri aankh daye-baye ho rahi thi…..
Aur Phhir………..
“whattt…. What do You mean….ki main bhool gayi ?”
“I mean…. I don’t care if you are my best friend’s slut or my best friend’s wife… I
hate you and I’ll always do.”
“Arman , tu jaa yaha se aur aaj ke bad yaha mat aana…”kisi anhoni ki aashanka se
Varun ne kaha
Aur main waha se jaane laga, lekin gate par pahuchkar mujhe kuch achchha nahi
laga. mera matlab kaha main aur kaha ye… kuch toh jawab dena banta tha isliye
main peechhe palta aur aur mere peechhe palat-te hee Varun ne kaha…
“ab kya…”
“Sonam ki maa ka bhosda…. ”bolkar main hasa aur haste hue waha se bahar
aaya….
.
Ab mri life me na friend tha aur na hee friendynamic… ab Varun jis-se sabse jyada
nafrat karta hai, wo main hoon… kuch din pahle tak yadi koyi ye bolta toh shayad
hee is brahmand me kisi ko yakin hota lekin ab paasa palat chuka tha… bhavnaye
palat chuki thi… dost, dushman ban chuke the aur dushman dost… kayi log ek hone
ja rahe the toh kuch log alag ho chuke the… kitna sab kuch pichhale kuch mahino
me change ho gaya tha aur kuch log kahte hai ki kuch hua hee nahi, meri story
aage badhi hee nahi khair is dauran jo chiz nahi badli wo tha main aur physics ke
laws… jaise F= ma or W=F.S etc.etc.
Itne dino me maine ek chiz jo sabse chhipa kar rakhi , yaha tak ki khud se bhi… wo
ye ki us raat jab version 2 ne David ke sar me botal fodi thi, jiske baad mera aur
sexy Nisha ka breakup hua tha… wo ladayi, wo kand, wo ghamasan mere aavesh
me aane se ya phhir ek-do din pahle ka plan nahi tha…. abhi Nisha aur David ki
reception party me aane ke baad jab maine apni ex-maal Nisha ko dekha toh mujhe
khayal aaya ki… wo actually bahut pahle se hee planned tha, wo mera instant
reaction nahi tha. aur iski vazah the do insaan aur do relations.
.
Varun aur Sonam ka pyar maine bahut pahle hee mahsoos kar liya tha, mujhe ye
ahsaas ho chala tha ki zaroor ye dono Shadi karenge… kyunki jis tarah main
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randiyo ko shakl se pahchan jata hoon usi tarah burchatto ko bhi pahchan jata
hoon aur Varun…um-hmm… main jaanta tha ki ek na ek din, aaj nahi toh kal
Varun mere paas aayega aur mujhse directly bolega ki wo Sonam ke sath rahna
chahta hai jiska indirectly matlab ye hoga ki main apna saman baandh kar waha
se nikal loon… ye hone hee wala tha… aaj nahi toh kal… aur jab ye hota toh meri
bahut bezzati hoti… isliye wo log mujhe jaane ke liye kahe,us-se pahle hee maine
waha se jaane ka nirnay le liya tha aur us raat wala kaand meri isi soch ka
parinam tha. actually us raat main ek tarah se Varun aur Sonam ki zindagi sawar
raha tha… unpar ahsaan kar raha tha… aur maine kiya bhi, par apne style se.
Main Nisha aur David ki wedding reception me aa toh gaya tha par yaha aane ke
baad mujhe laga ki mujhe nahi aana chahiye tha. yaha itne sare log the ki mujhe
un sabko dekh kar hee ghin aa rahi thi… sab madarchod role marne me lage hue
the yaha tak ki waiter bhi… mujhe yaha kuch bhi achchha nahi lag raha tha siway
decoration ke… khana shuru ho chuka tha, isliye maine bhi ek plate pakda aur
chutiyo ki tarah line me lage logo ke beech me ghusa…
“chal be… peechhe khisak… dekhta kya hai be,yahi pe ragad dunga.. chal
peechhe…”ek sajjan purush ko dhakka dekar maine kaha… jis par uske peechhe
khade sajjan purush ko shayad bura lag gaya…
“line se aao bhai, bahut khana hai… itna hadbadane ki zaroorat nahi hai…”
“chal be, main yaha bheekh magne nahi aaya hoon, jo line se aaun… ek toh meri
maal ki shadi ho rahi hai phhir bhi main patthar me dil rakhkar khana khane aaya
hoon, usme bhi tu ye expect kar raha hai ki main line me lagu…? Tera dimag toh
sahi hai…? tum logo ko zinda chhod diya wahi bahut hai… aur tu sale , aur paneer
dal na.. sale, bheekh de raha hai kya..lawde…. dimag kya gand me bharkar aaya
hai… ”
.
Isi tarah ladte-jhagadte maine apna plate bhara aur ek chair par jaha sab
Orchestra ka programme dekh rahe the waha jakar peechhe baith gaya… khane ki
plate lekar waha baithne wala main akela tha isliye jab main waha khane ki plate
lekar baitha toh mere agal-bagal wale, mere aage-peechhe wale… mujhe aur mere
khane ko ghoorne lage….
“ghoorte raho, kisi ko ek dana nahi dunga khane ka… badi mushqil se kood-fand
karke laya hoon itna material… I’m a material engineer… engineer roxxxx…. Sorry
sexy, tu jitna bhi try kar le… khoobsurat nahi dikhegi, isliye apne maa-baap ka
paisa mat kharch kar. ab tu hai hee itni badsurat…. Upar se mujhe line de rahi
hai… chal aage dekh. tujh jaiso ke toh main muh tak me na girau, mera sperm
ganda ho jayea… tujhe toh bisleri tak reject kar dega… chal ab aage dekhkar
ungali kar…”
“control 3.0, itna baukhlaya hua kyun hai…”
“jaise Esha ko Gautam ke sath dekhkar tu baukhlata tha, waise hee Nisha ko David
ke sath dekh kar main baukhala raha hoon… waha tu college ke ladko ko pel ke
apni bhadas nikalta tha yaha main in sabko pel raha hoon… kamal hai, tune 4 saal
kaise kaat liye, mujhse toh aadha ghanta bhi nahi saha ja raha…”

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“khana kha le….”
Maine abhi-abhi apne aage baithi jis ladki ko bura-bhala kaha tha, use meri baat
itni buri lagi ki wo waha se uthkar turant chali gayi aur mere aas-paas baithe log
apni jagah se uthkar dusari jagah baith gaye…. Maine apne dahine hath ki baah
upar uthayi aur plate me upasthit sabhi items ko mix karke full speed ke sath
khane laga, kyunki mujhe maloom tha ki jo ladki abhi yaha se bur maan ke gayi
hai wo kisi na kisi ko apne sath lekar wapas yaha aayegi…. Isliye bhalayi isi me
hai ki main jaldi se apna dose lekar future kand ke liye prepared rahu… ab sala
story me jinka role nahi hai, unhe bhi role dena padega….
Waise us ladki ke bur manne se yaad aaya ki maine Nisha ko lekar kayi din pahle
ek sapna dekha tha, jisme maine use apne hath se goli mari thi… kamal hai wo
dream toh sach hota nzar aa raha hai… kyunki Nisha par goli dagne ke liye mere
paas gun bhi hai aur vazah bhi… toh kya main sach me Nisha ko goli marunga ?
yadi haan, toh phhir is-se ek baat toh clear ho jayegi ki ye ability hai……
.
Us raat jab A-3 me mera Nisha ke sath breakup hua tha… isme bhi maine Nisha par
bahut bada ahsaan kiya tha. kyunki jab tak main wo kand nahi karta toh wo
mujhse chipki hee rahti aur is tarah David jaisa ladka jo ki kafi rahis hai…
sanskari hai, burchatta hai… wo Nisha ke hath se nikal jata… main David ko
pasand nahi karta aur na hee kabhi karunga, lekin isme koyi do ray nahi ki Nisha
ke liye David mujhse lakh guna better hai… kyunki ek toh David, Nisha ki tarah
normal tha, upar se uske bachpan ka dost bhi tha… Nisha ne mujhe kabhi nahi
bataya par main apne sixth sense ke jariye samajh chuka tha ki Nisha aur David ke
pariwar wale un dono ki shadi karana chahte hai… isliye ek na ek din, wo din bhi
aata jab Nisha ko lekar bawal hota…. Waise sach kahu toh main ghanta, Nisha ke
liye uske maa-baap se nahi ladta… waise bhi main Nisha ko itni baar chod chuka
tha ki uske karan ab mera lund bhi khada nahi hota tha… mera matlab, main
Nisha se bore ho chuka tha… yadi Nisha ki jagah Esha hoti tab situation shayad
alag hoti…
Mujhe andaza ho chala tha ki ek din Nisha bhi Varun ki tarah mujhe apni zindagi
se nikal fekegi, isliye wo mujhe pahle feke aur meri bezzati ho iske pahle hee maine
use fekne ka nirnay liya aur us raat A-3 me mujhe wo platform mila jaha maine
Varun aur Sonam ke liye ghar toh khali kiya hee, sath me David aur Nisha ke pyar
ki neev bhi dal di…. Par apne style me. lekin kamal ki baat toh ye hai ki mujhe aaj
tak iske baare me pata hee nahi tha… sala mahan hone ka yahi ek nuksan hai ki
main ahsaan karke bhool jata hoon…. Nisha aur Varun ko toh mera lund dho ke
peena chahiye…. These thankless people
.
“tumne meri friend se kya kaha…”
“chal ja na…”jisne bhi mujhe aawaz di thi use completely ignore markar maine
kaha “ rasgulla bhi mix ho gaya…. tabhich maza nahi aa raha”
“Arman, tumnee…. Meri….. friend……. Seee….. kyaaa…… kahaaa…..”

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Aur kha….kha…khana chhod main turant peechhe palta, kyunki is party me koyi
mera name bhi janta hai, is khayal se hee kafi shocked tha. mujhe laga ki shayad
Esha hogi par jab main peechhe muda toh……..
“maine tumhe toh invite nahi kiya tha… uspar bhi tum yaha aaye aur humare
family guest ki insult kar rahe ho…”
“Nisha… tu…. looking hot. kya gand hai...maza aa gaya lawda.... hahaha. Mujhe
nahi maloom ki tumne kya pahna hai matlab kya name hai is dress ka …par jo bhi
ho, overall sab badhiya hai…”plate wahi chair ke neeche khiskate hue maine
kaha…
“ab tumhari ye tricks mujhpe kaam nahi karengi Arman, isliye tumhare liye
behtar yahi hoga ki tum yaha se chalte bano…”
“tu sach me mujhse pyar karti thi ya phhir meri tarah tu bhi bas timepass kar rahi
thi… ye doubt clear kar de, taki baad me koyi locha na ho… wo kya hai ki mere
paas already hee itne sawal hai, usme ek aur sawal…”Nisha ki aankho me aankhe
dalkar maine puchha… main Nisha ko mahsoos kar sakta tha… us waqt jab main
uski aankho me dekh raha tha toh wo bilkul chup khadi thi, shayad use samajh hee
nahi aaya ki wo mere us sawal ka kya jawab de…. Aur phhir…
.
kaha “sala, rasgulla bhi mix ho gaya….”
“Arman, tumne…. Meri….. friend……. Se….. kya…… kaha…..”
Aur kha….kha…khana chhod main turant peechhe palta, kyunki is party me koyi
mera name bhi janta hai, is khayal se hee main kafi shocked tha. mujhe laga ki
shayad Esha hogi aur jab main peechhe muda toh……..
“…mam… oh.. hello… hi.... evening….good”apni plate wahi chair ke neeche khiska
kar roomal se apna hath aur muh pochhte hue maine R.Rathi ka abhivadan kiya…
“Who the hell do you think you are? Tumne meri friend se kya kaha…”us ladki ko
jise maine thodi der pahle jhada tha use saamne karke Rathi mam puchhi…
“ye itni khoobsurat ladki kaun hai, wow… hii…”uski taraf hath badhate hue maine
kaha…
“say sorry to her… Arman”
“I’m so sorry, dear… please forgive me”
“okay…”us badsurat ladki ko dilasa dete hue VR boli aur use waha se wapas bhej
di…
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“aapko thoda ajeeb lagega par, yahi ladki thodi der pahle Nisha ke sath aayi thi…
same Time, same dialogue ki tumne meri friend se kya kaha… bas story thodi
different thi, usme ye Nisha ki family guest thi”
“tum kuch bhi bolte ho, itni jaldi itna jhooth laate kaha se ho ?”
“ aap chahti hai ki main iska jawab doon ?”
“no….actually, I like both you and your lies ”
“mera sar ghoom raha hai…”apne sar ke baal ko kheechte hue maine kaha “waise
aap bhi yaha meri tarah langar me khane aayi ho ? ya sach me invitation mila
hai…”
“tumhe kaisa lagta hai…”
“invite kiya hoga Desai ji ne…”
“tum bhi langar me nahi aaye ho, mujhe pata hai…”
“Nisha meri ex….exxxx….xxx…….. xx….x”
.
kaha “sala, rasgulla bhi mix ho gaya….”
“TUMMM….. ek minute , main tumhe jaanti hoon…”
“mujhe kaun nahi jaanta…”khane ka nivala muh me dalkar maine uski taraf bina
dekhe kaha…
“TUMMM… wohi ho, jo mujhse camp me mile the… kya name hai tumhara… mujhe
yaad nahi aa raha… main tumhara name kaise bhool sakti hoon… oh god…
Aman…. Nahi Armann… haan Armaan… tum Arman ho…”
“Angeliiiiii…lliiiiii….llliiiiii….llliiina…. Angelina…”apni plate satak se chair ke

neeche rakhkar , roomal se apna hath-muh saaf karte hue main apni jagah se
khada hua aur Angelina ko kheechkar gale se lagaya….
“tumhe main bata nahi sakta… ki itne salo baad tumhe dekhkar aaj kitna khush
hua hoon main… matlab sare dukh-dard ek second me mit gaye… I love you….”
“what the….. leave me”
“le chaku mar, us baar ki tarah… wo nishan ab bhi hai….”Angelina ko kaskar

pakadte hue maine kaha “wow, toh main khush bhi hota hoon… wakayi … khush
hona kafi khushnuma hai… matlab main bina baat ke hee muskura raha hoon…
pata nahi kyun, par mujhe thodi-thodi sharam bhi aa rahi hai…”
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“Armaaaaan…”ghuma ke ek mukka mere pet me markar Angelina ne mujhe door

kiya…
“abey teri… chal chhod”apna pet sahlate hue maine kaha aur jo ladki Angelina ke
sath aayi thi jise maine thodi der pahle yani ki jise maine bahut der pahle jhada
tha… use dekhkar maine uska shukriya ada karte hue kaha “kamal hai, itne chhote
role me bhi tune kamal kar diya, tune toh mujhe Angelina se mila diya… love you
too… chalo teeno chalkar kinare me sex karte hai… maza hee aa jayega aaj toh…
tu, chhote role wali ladki… tu mera lund choosna aur Angelina, tujhe main
chusunga…yaahhhhh… Angelina, I love you so much… jaldi se apni nude photo
dikha… aaj toh maadharchod do-teen litre mutth marunga… sali, randi, chhinar,
kutiya, bhosdiwali, teri dayi ka bur… mar ja lawdi… Sali sapne me dikhti hai….
gand me dum hai toh NH-6 me aa, gaand fad dalunga… teri sari doctori na tere
gand me bhar dunga… bas tu aa ek baar, tere se bhi hisab chukana hai pichhali
baar ka…. bahut role me thi.. ”
“lawda, ye kya tha be….. 2.0….? mujhe toh bina piye hee hangover ho gaya… mujhe
aisa laga ki main Nisha ke wedding reception me hoon…? Par haqiqat me toh main
is ghanghor ratri me apne flat ki chhat par khada Nisha ke ghar me hone wale jalse
ko yahi se dekh raha hoon”
“delusions… ya phhir khuli aankh se sapna dekhna, wo bhi itni raat me chhat me
khade hokar… jo bhi samajh me aaye samajh le… waise ek third option bhi hai… ”
“no….”
“yes..”
“no…”
“why….”
“because the universe is infinite…”
“ yes and there are infinite number of universes… ”
“toh…”
“toh ho sakta hai ki ye incident kisi aur universe me hue honge ya ho rahe honge…
mera matlab ho sakta hai ki kisi ek me Angelina abtak tujhse mil bhi gayi hogi…
aur usi ki yaad yaha achanak se tere dimag me transfer hui hogi…”
“kuch bhi..? hatt lawda… daru peene de, yaha ek zindagi toh jee nahi pa raha aur
tu anginat zindagiyo ko jeene ki baat kar raha hai…”
Kayi saal pahle mujhe ek sapna aaya tha, jisme maine apne class ke ek launde ke
marne ka sapna dekha tha aur phhir jab meri neend khuli toh wo sach me mar
chuka tha… jise maine A DEAD DREAM(in 8th Semester….) nam diya tha. wo mera
pahla aur aakhiri aisa sapna tha, jo aajtak sach hua tha… yani ki mere dimag me
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bahut pahle se hee thoda-thoda locha tha. apne dimag ke bare me main kabhi
jyada nahi sochta aur khaskar ki tab, jab wo baat mere sapne ki ho ya phhir mere
bhram ki… kyunki mujhe pata hai ki main inke baare me jitna sochunga utna
jyada confuse hounga… aur ye samay confuse hone ka nahi hai. abhi kuch dino
baad mujhe mere dimag ki sabse jyada zaroorat hai, jab main Daddu se deal
karunga…. Waise main jyada toh nahi sochta par thoda-bahut toh soch hee leta
hoon jiske according abhi jo kuch der pahle hua, wo sab ek incident ko lekar teen
probable situations thi… jo mere sath hoti ya ho sakti thi, yadi main aaj raat Nisha
ke wedding reception me jakar us chhote role wali ladki ko batti deta… waise ye
bhi ho sakta hai ki aisa bilkul nahi hota aur meri kabhi us chhote role wali ladki se
mulaqat hee nahi hoti, ye bhi ho sakta hai ki waha party me Nisha gusse se mera
khoon kar deti… ya phhir main uska kar deta. Ya phhir ye ho bhi chuka hoga… kisi
aur jagah me… kisi aur universe me(as per 2.0) aur jab hone-khone ki baat chal
hee rahi hai toh hone ko toh ye bhi ho sakta tha ki ye reception party mere aur
Nisha ki hoti aur waha David meri tarah alag baitha hota, ya phhir ye shadi mere
aur Esha ki hoti aur Gautam chutiyo ki tarah us chhote role wali ladki se lad raha
hota….
Kahne ka matlab ye hai ki ye antheen sambhavnaye… jo kisi na kisi duniya me hui

hogi. Kahi main us waqt udas raha hounga toh kahi David toh kahi Gautam… kisi
duniya me Esha mujhse waisi mohabbat karti hogi , jo main us-se is duniya me
karta hoon… kahi Angelina ko maine dumb kiya hoga, jis tarah usne mujhe is
duniya me kiya… kahi main superstar hounga toh kahi super chutiya, kahi main
mar raha hounga toh kahi is waqt paida ho raha hounga… kisi duniya me stud ,
handsome hunk bhi ho sakta hoon toh kahi gay… gand-mara, hizda… kisi duniya
me main Vandana Rathi ki le raha hounga toh kisi aur duniya me Vandana Rathi
dildo lagakar meri le rahi hogi….. ye sab kahi na kahi ho raha hoga… (according to
2.0) par is duniya me main us party me gaya bhi nahi jaha se mere dimag me ye
sab ghusna shuru hua… main toh ab bhi apne flat ki chhat me cigarette peete hue
apne dilemma ko physics se relate karne ki bajay khulla mutth mar raha tha…
mujhe koyi dar nahi tha ki koyi mujhe dekh lega ya phhir koyi meri is harqat par
mera mazak udayega… mind ko relax karne ke liye maine mobile me full sound me
bf chalu kiya aur Vandana Rathi ko apne aage doggy style me jhuka hua assume
karke shuru ho gaya… aur jald hee Vandana Rathi ke garden ko apne shwet
boondo se pavitra kar diya…
“Sali, Shag Man se panga leti hai… 2.0, ek aur baar ho jaye kya…”
“hat be Mutth-Manav…”
Chapter-29: Recall-3/The Love Show
Mujhpar jin do logo ka prabhav sabse pada hai… unme se ek Esha hai aur dusara
Arun. Esha ki baat baad me karunga… pahle Arun…
Main college ke dino me aksar confuse hota tha ki main use copy karta hoon ya wo
mujhe… kyunki hum dono ki kayi aadatein, pasand kafi milti –julti thi… hum dono
ke dost bhi same the aur dushman bhi… kabhi-kabhi toh hum dono use bhi apna
dushman bana kar pel dete the, jise hum jaante tak nahi the. yadi wo Arun ka
dushman hai toh mera bhi dushma hai aur yadi Arun ka dost hai toh mera bhi dost
hai… bole toh buy 1 get 1 free wala offer… meri nazar me wo is duniya ka sabse
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coolest guy tha aur uski nazar me main…! siway 8th Semester ke kuch aakhiri dino
ko chhodkar…. Kyunki un dino wo ladkiyo ki tarah mujhe blame karne laga tha ki
uske sath jo bhi hua, hostel ke ladko ke sath job hi hua… sab meri vazah se hua…
mera matlab police ki maar ne uska level thoda sa gira diya tha.
Hum dono ka roll number bhi aage-peechhe tha aur hum dono ki understanding
itni badhiya thi ki koyi bhi teacher ho, kitne bhi teacher ho… aisa ek bhi exam ya
class test nahi tha… jisme humne cheating na ki ho. yaha tak ki Presentation aur
viva me bhi. Presentation me professors, hod aage baith-te the aur jab wo
presentation ke baad one word type conceptual question puchhte toh peechhe se
Arun mujhe unke jawab diya karta tha aur Viva me meri jaangh par ungaliyo se
likhkar…. Waise mostly hum dono samajh nahi pate the ki saamne wala kya kah
raha hai…. par kya fark padta hai.
Mujhe nahi lagta ki Arun jaisa koyi supportive kirdar meri story ya meri life me
mujhe kabhi milega… isliye aksar mera mood jab bhi jyada off hota hai ya main
kuch jyada hee depressed hota hoon toh aksar college ke kuch wo incidents yaad
kar leta jisme Arun shamil tha aur abhi…. main depressed tha…
“do-teen… paanch… paanch- paanch…. Dus…. Dus-do… barah”hostel se nikalkar

college jate samay Arun ko pata nahi kya hua ki wo apne sare jeb se chillar nikal-
nikal kar pure raaste gin raha tha…
“Arun, kisi ne mujhe aawaz di kya… par tu toh yaha hai… phhir mujhe kisne
pukara…”college ke andar ghuste hee maine Arun se kaha… mera matlab puchha
“… barah-ek… terah. Yess… Aaj canteen ka jugad ho gaya mera, tujhe nahi
khilaunga… dus ke do samose, chatni ke sath, phhir do rupaye ki beedi… aur ek ka
chewing gum”apne sabhi jeb se chillar nikal kar ginte hue Arun ne kafi khush
hokar kaha…
“mujhe kisi ne pukara kya ? Aaluuuund ?”
“tu gand mara na, Andmaaaan….. dekh, disturb mat kar… ek toh waise bhi
engineering me jab se calculator use karne laga hoon, 1+1 bhi calculator me check
karna padta hai…. terah… terah-do…. Pandra… total pandra rupaye… yani do
samose matar ke sath, do rupaye ki beedi aur ek last me chewing gum…”
“thik hai phhir, ye le mera bag aur ekdum first desk par rakhna… aaj Deepika mam
ko line dena hai,uske chal-chalan thik nahi lag rahe aaj-kal mujhe… main is lavde
ke baal Gautam ko pel ke aata hoon… lagta hai, usi ne aawaz di hai mujhe, wo dekh
parking me khada hai…”bag Arun ko dekar maine kaha…
“main bhi chalu kya, kahi tujhe akela jaankar pel na de… waise bhi jabse hostel
walo ne Varun aur uske dosto ka gang-bang kiya hai, college ka mahol garam
hai…”
“jise mujhe pelna tha, wo sab pel chuke… ab ye college royega mere name se aur
yaha rahne wale log bhi…. Main is college me hostelers ki gunda-gardi us level tak
le jaunga, jaha tak Sidar bhi kabhi nahi le ja sakta… Sidar toh aksar thanda pad
jata hai… bas tu unhe agle saal nikalne de aur hostel ki Kaman mere hath me aane
de… phhir dekhna ye bhosdiwale 6-7 saal se engineering karne walo ko kaise pelta
hoon… college me saans lena duswar kar dunga inka…. Bhosdiwale jaha dikhenge
wahi fodunga … Bas ek saal aur…”
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“chal be, aukat me rahkar baat kiya kar… jab ragging hui thi toh kaise gand jaisi
shakl bana kar lauta tha khooni ground se aur Sidar ki help se do-char ko pel kya
diya khud ko bhosdiwale shurma samajhne laga…. sab Shri Arun ki sangati ka
asar hai. Shri Arun ke sath rahkar tumhare aise aatu-jhatu bhi khud ko top
samajhne lagte hai…”
“bhag lawde, chutiya… tumhari sale aukat hee nahi hai Shri Arman ke sath rahne
ki… tu ja… jake Kurre sir se gand marwa, sale badsurat insaan.. tujhse jyada gora
toh mera lund hai”
“abey randve, natural color hai ye mera… tumhare jaise aat-jhat darjano cream
nahi lagata main aur sanwla hoon toh kya hua… sanwle toh bhagwan bhi the”
“jo mere se kam smart hota hai, us-se main baat nahi karta…”
“kyun…? lund leta hai kya unka…. Jo sirf apne se adhik smart dikhne walo se hee
baat karega”
“chal be… tu jaa..”
“tu jaa…”
“ja.. jake gand marwa…”
“tu marwa na… tera gand bada hai…”
“bhag lavde…”
“bhag bakchod…”waha se jate hue Arun ne kaha aur main chashma-vashma

lagakar parking me aaya… jaha Gautam , kuch seniors ke sath khada tha….
.
Waise ek andar ki baat batau… ? mujhe kisi ne aawaz nahi di thi… wo toh mere
andar hee chuluk thi ki main Gautam ko jakar neecha dikhau. Kyunki main kisi ko
marte dum tak bhale na maru, lekin marte dum tak insult zaroor hoon… ye mere
rag-rag me hai aur jab meri is aadat se mera bhai, mera baap nahi bach saka toh
phhir Gautam kaise bach sakta hai…
Jab se maine college me saat saal se engineering kar rahe Varun ko thoka tha,
tabhich se mere tevar badal gaye the… College me mera name waisich hee circulate
ho raha tha, jaise body me blood. Main first year me hee jaan gaya tha ki ye college
meri rakhail ban kar rahne wala hai… mujhe bas Sidar ke college se jaane ka
intezaar karna tha… kyunki Sidar ke andar wo aag nahi thi, jo mere andar thi…
uske andar wo gussa nahi tha, jo mere andar mere gharwalo, Esha, Gautam ko
lekar tha… Sidar dinbhar kahi na kahi busy rahta , kabhi football khelne me toh,
kabhi gym me, toh kabhi padhai me aur uske peechhe aaj bhi hostelers ka wo rutba
nahi tha, jo ho sakta tha… jo mere rahte ho sakta tha. infact maine ek list bhi bana
li thi jisme maine un logo ke naam likh rakhe the jinhe main hostel ki Kaman apne
hath me aane ke baad pelne wala tha….

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“kaise be, bahut udd raha hai beta tu…”jab main parking me pahucha toh Gautam
ka ek dost mujhse bola…
“chup be, baap ko beta bolta hai…”
“Sidar ke dum pe uchak le, jab tak wo yaha hai… phhir tum sabko ek-ek karke
hostel me hee ragad dunga…”
“abey jhat, Sidar ko jaane de ek baar… phhir dekh kaise chodta hoon main tum
sabko… ye jo college me dinbhar idhar se udhar gand marwate rahte ho na,
madarchodo…. college me saans lena mushqil kar dunga… abhi jo juniors se tu-
tadak karte ho na… un sabse hee laat khilaunga… is duniya me yadi main sabse
jyada kisi se nafrat karta hoon toh wo tu hai… tu… tu… abey tu… abey tu nahi, tera
toh koyi role hee nahi hai story me.. tu hat samne se… haan Gautam, wo tu hai…tu”
“Arman, tujhe dekhkar mujhe hasi aati hai… tu kyun mujhse bhidna chahta hai, tu
mujhe abhi achchhi tarah se nahi janta.. meri pahuch ka tujhe andaza bhi nahi
hai… uspar se tu Esha ke peechhe bhi pada hai. uske sapne dekhna bhool ja.
Abey,sale… khud ko compare kar Esha se. teri itni aukat nahi ki tu uska ek din ka
bhi kharcha utha sake…. Upar se tu is firaq me hai ki wo mujhe chhodkar tere paas
aayegi… ? kabhi nahi… Isliye bolta hoon… tu ja yaha se. Engineering karne aaya
hai toh engineering karke chup-chap nikal ja… nahi toh, aisa hashra karunga na
ki, gali me regne walo kutto se bhi badtar teri zindagi hogi… jitni baar saans lega,
utni baar mere name se royega.”
“sach ?....... tujhe sach me lagta hai ki mujhe Esha ko patane ke liye wo sab karne ki
zaroorat hai jo tu kah raha hai…… ya jo tune kiya hai… ? abey bhosad-lal meri
history nikal ke dekh le….. I am the best and the beast…I’ll either beat you or eat
you…. tujhe toh main pelunga hee, sath me tere aage-peechhe walo ko bhi pelunga.
Mark my words. Abhi chalta hoon, abhi Deepika mam line me hai, phhir teri behan
Divya line me aayegi aur aakhiri me Esha… aur rahi baat tere-mere comparison ki
toh wo waqt hee batayega ki kiska lund kitna bada hai…. tum sabki maa ka
bhosda. Ab gand me dum hai toh hath laga ke dikhao ya mera laad chat ke jao….”
Update-104
….. I am the best and the beast…I’ll either beat you or eat you…. tujhe toh main
pelunga hee, sath me tere aage-peechhe walo ko bhi pelunga. Mark my words. Abhi
chalta hoon, abhi Deepika mam line me hai, phhir teri behan Divya line me aayegi
aur aakhiri me Esha… aur rahi baat tere-mere comparison ki toh wo waqt hee
batayega ki kiska lund kitna bada hai…. tum sabki maa ka bhosda. Ab gand me
dum hai toh hath laga ke dikhao ya mera laad chat ke jao….”
Maine Gautam aur uske sath khade chhote role wale ladko ko gali dekar khulla
offer diya ki wo mujhpar hath uthaye. Darasal main ye chahta tha ki aisa ho
kyunki uske baad Sidar un sabki dayi-mahtari kar deta… Sidar ke andar bhale hee
meri jitni aag na ho, lekin uske contacts bahut the… local politician se lekar college
ke director tak Sidar ka danka bajta tha… Local Politicians se contacts isliye tha
kyunki election time me hostel ke launde Sidar ke kahne par rally wagerah me
nikal jate, isliye aise maar-dhadh wale lafde se toh Sidar ke sar me joo tak nahi
rengati thi aur rahi Director ke support ki baat toh… wo isliye, kyunki ek baar
Director ki laundi ko kisi ne shayad fasa liya tha… phhir Sidar ne us ladke ko pel-
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pal ke pura matter close kiya tha… isiliye main chahta tha ki Sidar aur Gautam ke
beech an-ban ho jaye…. Jab tak Sidar college me tha tha tab tak ye balance me tha.
phhir uske baad maine do-char seniors ko pel-pal ke jaise-taise hostel ki kamaan
sambhali aur phhir pure balance ki maa-behan ek kar di… na toh maine election
rally me launde bheje aur na hee director ki izzat ka koyi khayal rakha… par iska
matlab ye nahi ki hostelers ki power down hui thi, balki mere time me toh hostelers
peak par the…
aur phhir 8th Semester me Aradhna aur Collector ke launde ko pelne ke karan sab
kuch tahas-nahas ho gaya… ab meri college ki kya haalat hai, mujhe nahi pata…
waise bhi, ab…..kya fark padta hai.
Toh us din parking me Gautam ne mujhe kuch nahi kiya aur na hee uske dosto ne…
jis-se mera Sidar ko Gautam ke peechhe lagane ka plan flop ho gaya… isliye main
waha se seedhe apne class pahucha aur Deepika mam ke gand-doodh dekhkar unhe
mann me gacha-gach do-teen bar choda aur phhir Canteen me ja pahucha…
“gand maraye padhayi, mujhe physics aati hai… baki subject padhne ki kya
zaroorat. One night fight karke nikal lunga subject… ”
Ye wo time tha… jab meri……. Esha aur Gautam ki bahan R.Divya se thodi-bahut
baat-chit, thodi bahut hasi-mazak chalti thi… bole toh shuru-shuru ke din the. Un
dino Esha aksar mujhe canteen me mil jaya karti thi… kabhi akele toh kabhi apni
kuch saheliyo ke sath… aaj wo waha akeli thi… actually akele nahi thi, waha Divya
bhi thi par ab wo waha se uth kar bahar jaa rahi thi… main nahi chahta tha ki ye
chhote role wali ladki bahar aate waqt mujhse baat kare… lekin….
“hiiii…. Armaaan… tumne goggle kyun lagaya hai, yaha toh dhoop nahi hai…”
“mere andar bahut dard hai aur main nahi chahta ki koyi mere dard ko meri
aankho se dekh le… ”
“lol… Armaaaaan….”
“okay, R.Divya…”
“itna respect kyun dete ho… tum har ladki ko…? Jo unke name ke aage R.
abbreviation use karte ho…”
“lol…”
“isme kya lol…? Anyway, maine tumse kaha tha ki tum mujhe twitter par follow
karo, par tumne abhi tak kiya nahi…”
“pahle 100 de, phhir karunga…”
Jiske baad R.Divya waha se katak li aur phhir maine Esha ko dekha wo is samay
frootie me straw dalkar mast frootie pee rahi thi… main jaha khada tha wahi
khada hokar use kafi der tak dekhta raha… kitne pyar se wo frootie pee rahi thi…
yadi wo usi frootie me straw dalkar mujhe peene de toh main abhi apne ghar me
batwara karake apne hisse ki sari jaydad uske naam karwa doon. Khair aisa hua
nahi aur frootie peene ke baad Esha ne kisi ko call kiya aur phhir ek aur frootie ka
order dekar apni nail polish dekhne lagi…. Esha ko aisa karte dekh mujhse raha
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nahi gaya aur do-teen jordar matlab pelam-pel matlab gand-fad lambi saans lekar
main Esha ki taraf badha…
“frootie se jyada maja… maaza me aata hai… tumhe peena chahiye…”
“Armaan… tum.”
“mujhe bahut achchha lagta hai jab koyi mujhe ARMAN ki jagah ARMAAN kahta
hai toh… matlab itna achchha lagta hai ki saamne wale ko kiss karne ka mann
karta hai…”
“Hi… how are you…”
“kya batau tujhe ki kaisa hoon main aur bata bhi dunga toh tu samhegi nahi…
mujhe samajh nahi aata ki tujhe sach me kuch samajh nahi aata ya phhir tu bas
mere maje lene ke liye kuch na samajhne ka natak karti hai… Gautam bol raha tha
ki tere kharche bahut hai….. ek baar haan bol de, kidney… bechkar iphone gift
karunga… ”
“ye kya… tum toh kuch bol hee nahi rahe… maine puchha how are you…”
“fine…ahh.. fine… fine… fine… fine..phhine… phhhhhinnneeee aur tum…? Maine

suna ki tumne suicide karne ki koshish ki thi… mujhe bolti main jaan se maar
deta…lol”
Itna bolkar main hasne laga ye sochkar ki ab Esha bhi hasegi… lekin wo toh ulta
aur jyada serious ho gayi… shayad use meri baat pasand nahi aayi thi… maine
kuch galat kaha kya...? sala sense of humor hee nahi hai, logo ke paas…
“ahem… sorry, not-lol…”
“please go…”
“bola na sorry… mujhe laga ki ye sach nahi hoga, kisi ne aise hee afwah udayi
hogi… par… sorry… I’m sorry, mujhe pata hota ki ye sach hai toh tumhe lagta hai
ki main tumse kabhi is baare me puchhta…”
“no problem… waise bhi main ab us-se aage badh chuki hoon. Mujhe pata hai ki
college me kayi logo ko pata hai ki maine Gautam ki khatir suicide attempt kiya
par mujhe is-se jyada fark nahi padta… par jab meri best friend Divya hee mujhe
ignore kare toh main kya karu....”
((“par wo toh abhi yahi se gayi na…? shayad jab ye aayi hogi, Divya ke saamne
baithi hogi tab wo yaha se chali gayi…? Kitna hoshiyar hoon main… lawda ”))
“mujhe is-se jyada fark nahi padta… par jab meri best friend Divya hee mujhe
ignore kare toh main kya karu....”
“face it….”
“and what about Gautam… without him I feel trapped, abandoned, empty.. lonely”

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“Gaauutam...”apne gusse ko breathing ke through dissipate karke maine kaha “If

you are alone then you’re strong. You just cant imagine the power of loneliness.”
“ye kahna aasan hai Arman, par aise akele rahna aasan nahi hai… yadi main wo
karu jo tum mujhe kahne ko kah rahe ho toh main andar hee andar apne aap me
ghut kar rah jaungi… phhir kya pata main shayad pagal bhi ho jaun. Aise akele
rahne ki advice dena bahut aasan hai lekin rahna mushqil… Tum kuch nahi
jaante… aajkal Gautam mujhse jyada baat nahi karta aur karta bhi hai toh rookhe
andaaz me. mere suicide ke baad police case bhi hua tha…. jiske karan shayad
Gautam mujhse naraz hai… wo mujhe kabhi maaf nahi karega…. ”
Apne pyar ke saamne baithkar uske pyar ke baare me sun-na ye beshak is duniya
ka sabse mushqil kaam nahi hai par us-se kam bhi nahi hai… aur uspar se apni ray
dena… ye toh sirf bhagwan hee kar sakta hai… kya main bhagwan hoon ? kahi aisa
toh nahi ki main sach me koyi bhagwan hoon aur mujhe Dharti-lok ke kalyan ke
liye bheja gaya ho…? waise bhi… mujhe bachpan se hee mahsoos hota hai ki…
mera janm nahi balki avatar hua hai…
“… aajkal Gautam mujhse jyada baat nahi karta aur karta bhi hai toh rookhe
andaaz me. mere suicide ke baad police case bhi hua tha…. jiske karan shayad
Gautam mujhse naraz hai… wo mujhe kabhi maaf nahi karega…. ”
“acting kar raha hai wo… wo tumhe kabhi nahi chhodega…”(aur khaskar ke tab
toh bilkul bhi nahi, jab use maloom hai ki main tumhe pakadne ke liye taiyar hoon)
“tum Gautam ki jagah hote aur ye sab police ka lafda meri vazah se tumhare khilaf
hota toh tum kya karte…”
“main kya karta…?”
“hmm..”
“main tumhare paas aata aur tumhara hath aisich jaise abhi apne hath me pakad
raha hoon waisich tumhara hath, ane hath me lekar tumhare sath frootie ke do-
teen hard peg marta aur bolta.… English me bolta…ki… it doesn’t matter what you
did, what you do or what you’ll do…. I love you and I’ll always do.”
“sach…”khushi se meri taraf dekhkar Esha boli…
“aasar toh isi ke hai, ab aage kya ho, mujhe kya pata…”
“Arman , tum bahut achchhe ho..”
“mujhe pata hai”
“aur handsome bhi…”
“ye bhi pata hai”
“tum basketball bhi achchha khelte ho… Gautam sir se bhi achchha…”

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“yo..”
“I love you…”
“I love you too….”flow-flow me maine kaha par phhir mujhe yaad aaya ki aisa toh
kabhi hua hee nahi, Esha ne toh us din I love you nahi kaha tha.. phhir aaj kaise ?
aur Esha, kab se Gautam ko…. Gautam sir bolne lagi…? Ohhh…….my…….. Physics”
Chapter-30: Sexual Congress
“I love you sir….”
“I love you , Esha… par tumhari tabiyat toh thik hai na, mera matlab yun
achanak…. Abeeeeyyyyy teri” saamne Aradhna ko Esha ki jagah dekhkar main
chauka ,buri tarah chauka… itni buri tarah ki.. chauk-kar wahi kursi samet neeche
gir gaya aur isi ke sath meri aankh khuli…
“toh wo Esha thi… jiske karan aapne mujhe chhoda tha….”mera sar sahlate hue
Aradhna boli aur maine koyi jawab diye bina pahle situation ko samajhna thik
samjha…
.
Main is waqt apne bed par leta hua tha aur Aradhna mera sar sahla rahi thi…
maine deewar me tangi ghadi me time dekha aur deewar me apne dwara banaye
calendar ki taraf dekha…. hamesha ki tarah aaj bhi din, taarikh, samay ka mujhe
koyi andaza nahi tha… ghadi me 3 baj rahe the par, dopahar wala ya subah
wala….? Confusion door karne ke liye maine khidki ki taraf dekha…
“ Khidki ka kaanch mutth colour ka dikh raha hai, toh dopahar wala hee teen
hoga… maine aisa andaza lagaya.”
“aaj toh Ajmeri se milne ka din hai…”fatak se bistar se uthkar main bola “Aradhna
,chal tu khisak sixth door se…. arey waaaah, mere bolne se pahle hee chali gayi…”
.
Ganga-Jamuna jaane ke liye maine NH-6 me auto rukwaya aur andar ghusa.
andar mere aalawa, do aur launde baithe the… maine dono ko right side me
khisakne ke liye kaha aur phhir left side me ekdum konte me baith gaya… kyunki
main nahi chahta tha ki wo dono mujhe kisi bhi tarah se chhue… I just hate
everyone…
Wo do ladke kisi ladki ke matter pe baat kar rahe the. Main sunna toh nahi chahta
tha, par kyunki sound.. solid, liquid aur gas teeno se move kar sakti hai isliye unki
conversations longitudinal wave ke roop me travel karte hue mere kaano tak
pahuchi…
“tu dekh lena, Dheeraj…. yadi Sakshi ne mera pyar swikar nahi kiya toh main apne
pran de dunga… phhir use samajh aayega ki main us-se kitni mohabbat karta
hoon.. phhir use mera pyar samajh aayega… phhir wo mere liye aansu bahayegi
,jaise abhi uske liye aansu bahata hoon… lekin tab main is duniya se ja chuka
hounga. Main marne se pahle ek suicide note bhi likhunga… jisme uska name
mention karunga ki uski vazah se maine atmahatya ki hai… phhir dekhna kaise
badnaam hogi wo… koyi thookega bhi nahi uske upar”
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“abey, bhopu… laundi log ke peechhe itna serious nahi hone ka… choot chahiye toh
ganga-jamuna ja… 100-200 me ladkiya apni gand tak marwa leti hai…. ”uska sathi
bola..
“gand marwane ka 500 leti hai randiya… 100-200 us samay ka rate hai jab tera
baap randi chodne jata raha hoga….”Ganga-Jamuna ki jaankari un dono ko dete
hue maine kaha…
“kya bola be ?”meri taraf chauk kar wo dono dekhe aur un dono me se jiska name
Dheeraj tha, yani ki jo suicide karne wale ka sathi tha usne apna daant peeskar
mujhse kaha
“tu baju hat toh…”Dheeraj ko baju karke jo launda suicide karke ladki ko fasane
wala tha use maine ratt se ek jhapad mara, jiske jawab me uska dost bina soche-
samjhe, bina kisi planning ke mujhpar jhapta …lekin maine toh aisa hoga pahle
hee soch liya tha aur main iske liye taiyar bhi tha… isliye maine samay ko thoda
peechhe kiya aur Dheeraj ke mujhpar jhapatta marne se pahle hee maine uska baal
pakad kar uske thobde me mukke pe mukke marne laga…. confused ?
Ab actually hua ye tha ki jab maine us pahle wale launde ko jo laundi ke pyar me
suicide karne wala tha use pahla jhapad marne ke turant baad maine uske sathi
par hamla kar diya tha aur is tarah jo uske dwara mujh par jhapatta marne ki
meri assumption thi wo kabhi hui hee nahi…. maine wo kaha, kyunki mujhe waisa
mahsoos hua…
“kyun maar raha hai be inhe….”side me auto rok-kar driving seat se hee mujhe
pakadte hue auto wale ne kaha…
“chup lawda, warna tujhe bhi marunga…”bolkar maine auto wale ko dhakka diya
aur un dono ka pair pakad kar ghaseet-te hue auto se bahar nikala…
“arey aakhir baat kya hai, kyun mar raha hai in dono ko…”
“kyun mar raha hu… ye sala suicide karke ek bholi-bhali masoom item ki zindagi
barbad karne wala tha, in dono ki maa ko chod dalu…. Jab koyi ladkiyo ki izzat
nahi karta toh mujhe bahut gussa aata hai, itna gussa ki dil toh karta hai ki goliyo
se bhoon du….”katta nikalkar maine kaha “tu sun be rondu, yadi suicide kiya toh
teri dayi-mahtari kar dunga… ghoorta kya hai be, kya ukhad lega….. yadi teri maa
chhinar nahi hai aur tu apne baap ki aulaad hai toh uth ke muqabala kar…
madarchod phhir se ghoora… lee… ”
Ek laat pelkar maine kaha
“Apṇa chatiahe tara yettheeee rahu. majhe mitra yave. Te tumhala balatkar hoila
te apna vijaya hoilaa. Te tumhala ṭhara marila. Mi mhaṇalo, mhaṇuna apaṇa pita
mulaga asala tara nantara karu…. ”neeche pade-pade wo jor se chillaya… “Jai
Maharashtraaaaa….”
“chup bhosdike… Marathi me bolega toh dar jaunga kya… teri Aai ki choot.. teri
Aai ka bhosda…”
“kolhi mulaga, kutra nahi toh… dum hai toh rook yahi”
309
“bahaduri aur bewkoofi me jyada fark nahi hota aur insaan ko isi fark ko pachan-
na chahiye… mera yaha khada rahna bewkoofi hai aur tera apne gang ke sath
mujhe dhoondhte hue River View Colony me A-3 tak aana bahaduri. Yadi teri maa
chhinar nahi hai toh apne dosto ko lekar aana, warna ye raha mera mobile
number… apni Aai ke bhosde ka video send kar dena… mutth marne ka jugad ho
jayega… bye… aur bhoolna mat, mera naam Varun hai…” maine kaha aur waha se
sadak ke dusari taraf aaya… wo dono ab bhi zameen me pade the aur auto wala
unki madad kar raha tha….
“3.0… goli mar lawda… zinda kyun chhod diya…. khali-fokat me apne dushman
badha raha hai… ”
“Shri Arman can live without friends but not without enemies…”
Sadak ki dusari side se maine dusara auto pakda aur Ganga-Jamuna ke liye
ravana ho gaya par jab auto thodi door aage gaya toh mujhe dhyan aaya ki auto
toh Ganga-Jamuna jaane ke bajay RVC ki taraf ja raha hai… maine jaldi se auto
rukwaya aur auto se utarkar phhir se road ke dusari side jakar Ganga-Jamuna ke
liye auto pakda aur tab mujhe dhyan aaya ki ye toh mera hee plan tha ki pahle
River View Colony ki taraf jane wale ek auto me thodi der ke liye baithna aur phhir
us-se utarkar apne target ki taraf wapas badhna… taaki jin do laundo ko maine
abhi-abhi just pela hai, unke sathi mujhe wrong direction me dhoondhate rahe….
Ya phhir ye sab ittefaq ho sakta hai, mujhe nahi pata….. par, mujhe jo is waqt pata
tha wo ye ki main pure ek din peechhe chal raha tha.
Maine parso Daddu ke samne Ajmeri ki choot aur gand marne ki apni dili ichchha
jahir ki thi, jise Daddu ne swikar kar liya tha par phhir kyunki parso mera chudai
karne ka koyi mood nahi tha toh maine ise ek din postponed kar diya yani ki kal ke
liye…. Par kal main Ganga-Jamuna nahi aaya tha. kal sabse pahle main Varun ke
paas gaya, jaha se mujhe maloom chala ki Nisha aur David ki shadi ho chuki hai
aur phhir sham ko chhat me ajeeb-ajeeb sochna jisme ek baar maine Nisha se baat
ki toh ek baar randi Vandana se toh ek baar Angelina se…. yani maine kal ka apna
pura din aise hee waste kar diya tha.
Mujhe andaza ho chala tha ki mere kal is tarah nadarad rahne aur apna mobile
band kare rahne se Daddu mujhse naraz hoga, mujhpar thoda chillayega… par jab
usne mujhe dekha yani ki jab doahar main Daddu ke adde me pahucha toh wo
mujhe dekhkar gussa hone ki bajay muskurane laga….
“ye sala gay toh nahi hai na…. shakl toh sala aise hee bana raha hai…”Daddu ki
taraf muskurate hue main badha…
“ Ajmeri shayad so rahi hogi… kisi aur ke sath”
“no problem, wo kal aa nahi paya, uske liye sorry….”
“kono baat nahi… aaj aa gaya na….”

.

310
Aaj main jab Daddu ke adde me pahucha toh wo mujhe dekhkar gussa hone ki
bajay muskurane laga….
“ye sala gay toh nahi hai na…. shakl toh sala aise hee bana raha hai…”Daddu ki
taraf muskurate hue main badha…
“itni der kyun kar di… Ajmeri so rahi hogi…”
“no problem, wo kal aa nahi paya, uske liye sorry….”
“kal nahi aa paya matlab…”
“kal nahi aa paya matlab… kal nahi aa paya, ab iska kya matlab….. sorry”
“kal hee toh aaya tha tu mitra”
“kal nahi parso, kal toh main apne dost Varun ke flat A-3 me tha… A-3 me, jo ki
River View Colony me hai…”
“A-3 me… River View Colony ”Daddu ne jor lagakar kaha…
Quote:
“shitttt……… shitttt……. Shitttttt………….. abey gandu address kyun bataya isko,
maha-bakchod aadmi hai be tu toh… kahi teri taalash me pura river view chhaan
mara toh……?”
“dhatt teri, madarchod ne kal-parso bol ke confuse kar diya toh confusion me laga
ki ye autowala launda hai..… waise time repeat hua kya ?”
“gand mara…”
“bahut logo ke sath dhandha kiyela hai apun, par terech jaisa bewda nahi dekha
maine… jo ek din aage chala jaye. Arey chhote, tu kal idhar aaya tha, jiske baad
apun dono ne pura programme set kiya aur phhir tune mere sath photo liya tha…”
“aur autograph bhi…. shayad ”
“haan… aur phhir Ajmeri wali baat…”
“achchhaaa…. toh wo kal tha… ye sale mere sapne bhi itne lambe aur real hote hai
Daddu bhai ki … anyway, Ajmeri kab tak aayegi….”apni aankhe malte hue maine
puchha
((yani kal na toh main Varun ke ghar gaya, na hee maine use 2,00,000 diye aur
na hee Nisha ki shadi hui…? Yani mere bag me ab bhi 2 laakh honge…))
“apun tere ko udhar bhej dega thodi der me… par bheje me do chiz dal lene ka…
Ajmeri se koyi badtamizi nahi aur wo jo bole sirf utna hee karne ka… is Ganga-
Jamuna ki sabse anmol chiz hai Ajmeri”
“bilkul…. Ajmeri ko toh main left side se lunga”
“left side se…? tere dono side lund hai kya…”

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“ye salaaa… gandu… first part me nahi tha kya, jo mere code word nahi samajh
pata…”Daddu ko dekhkar maine realize kiya aur light ki speed se past me gaya aur
light ki speed se wapas present me aaya… “abey… ye first part me nahi tha…”
“tune bataya nahi left side se lega matlab…”daant dikhate hue Daddu ne puchha…
“left side se lunga matlab dil se… dil left side me hota hai na…”
“dil bole toh ye…. Ye dekh…”apne baya doodh dabakar Daddu ne puchha
“aadha inch right me aur aadha inch neeche…”
“yaha…”
“exactly….”
“thik hai toh…”waha mauzood apne kayi aadmiyo me se Daddu ne ek ko saamne

bulaya aur mujhe Ajmeri bai ke kothe me le jaane ke liye kaha….
.
Daddu ke adde se Ajmeri ke kothe ki taraf yadi paidal chala jaye toh yahi kuch 10-
15 minute ka raasta tha… maine apne jeb se Stamina RX ki ek goli nikali aur muh
me dala…
“bhosdike… do toh tu room se kha ke nikla tha… ab kisliye…”
“wo sab chhod… pani toh hai hee nahi…”bolkar maine apne muh me laar create
kiya aur goli nigal gaya…
“khao beta… jab side effect marega na tab samajh aayega, upar se khali pet.. tujhe
yaad bhi hai ki last time khana kab khaya tha tu…”
“kal sham ko… shayad… tu faltu me tension le raha hai... abey main Shri Arman
hoon…”
.
“Arun, bhosdike…. result aa gaya fifth semester ka aur tu yaha mere bistar me
mera blanket oodh kar bf dekh raha hai….”
“sar bahut bhari-bhari sa lag raha tha toh socha ki mind fresh kar loon…”
“sach bata, tune mutth toh nahi mara na… mere bistar me…”
“bas , nikalne hee wala tha… par…. Anyway badhai ho… 7.6 , wah launde…”
“tune result dekh bhi liya…”chauk kar maine Arun ke mobile se earphone nikala
aur wahi chair me baithkar bf dekhne laga… “aawaz aur tez kar na… aaahhh….
Aaahhh ki aawaz sun-ni hai…. haan , bas itna hee … warna aur bhi log aa
jayenge… chod… aur chod, bur fad de randi ka… mere paas aayegi toh aisa
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chodunga ki jaangh-vaangh sab ukhad dunga…. Ye dekh aise.. abey idhar dekh
na…”
“shanti se dekh na be….”
“tere result ka kya hua…”
“hatt.. lawda…”
“phhir back laga kya…. lol”
“back wale me phhir se back lag gaya, lagta hai madarchod 8th semester me hee
clear hoga…. ye electrical subject…. Inki maa ko chod dalu, teen-teen book se padh
ke gaya tha, phhir bhi back…. Lagatar pachawi baar back laga hai electrical me.
ab maine itna electrical subject padh liya hai ki Electrical walo se jyada knowledge
mujhe hai… pata nahi lawda kaise copy check karte hai bitiyachod…. Mujhe copy
check karne wale ka bas address de de koyi, uske purvajo tak ko chod dalunga….
Madarchod ne tamasha bana rakha hai… mahtari-chod nahi toh… hizda,
bhosdiwala, suar ki aaulad… ”
“chal chhod na, waise apne class ki ek ladki ne aaj ek sawal puchha mujhse… kahe
toh batau…”
“hatt lawda… apne class ki ladkiyo ki baat mat kar… randi hai sab Sali, chhinar…
yadi wo mera mutth chatne ke liye magengi na… toh bhi nahi dunga unhe.
Bhagwan ne unhe paida kyun kiya… unhe toh 20-30 baar mar jana chahiye tha
abhi tak… Arman, main tujhe bata raha hoon… un sabki maa randi hogi… ek mutth
ki paidaish nahi hai wo sab…. 10-12 logo ne ek sath unki maa ko choda hoga, jis-se
un 10-12 logo ka mutth mix hokar wo paida hui hai. kudrat ka shrap hai bahinchod
sab ki sab. Mera vash chale na toh roj unke muh me moot kar laat-e-laat maru… ”
“bas kar be… tera back kya laga tu toh… itna toh main bhi nahi bolta. Khair..
sawal sun…. aaj wo bade gand wali mere paas aayi aur boli ki… Arman, What is
more dangerous than hatred of a woman….”
“toh tune kya kaha…”
“bhag lawda…. Mera matlab main sirf bhag kahna chahta tha lekin lawda apne
aap nikal gaya… us bade gand wali ladki ki toh gand hee fat gayi… Sali mujhse
romantic ho rahi thi… bolti hai ki… Arman, kya tum apni maa-behan se bhi aise
baat karte ho…”
“sach…”mobile wahi bistar par fek kar Arun uthkar baith gaya aur bola “toh
phhir…. Tune kya kaha…”
“wahi… jo pahli baar kaha tha…. bhag lawda…. Waise tere hisab se kya answer
hona chahiye…. What is more dangerous than hatred of a woman…”
“bhag lawda…”
“hahaha…..”

313
“Arman…? Arman…… abey bahar aa….”
“Arun…What is more dangerous than hatred of a woman…”
“arey chhod na, Arun ko… wo dekh Ajmeri ka kotha aa gaya… ek aur josh wali goli
yahi kha le, warna phhir andar Ajmeri ke saamne khayega toh tujh par hasegi…
lawde ke baal, tu abhi tak bahar nahi aaya….”
“tu chup kar be, 2.0… Arun , tu jawab de… What is more dangerous than hatred of
a woman…”
“arey gand maraye hatred of woman… tu abhi idhar activate ho…”
“hatt lawda… Arun, tell me…. What is more dangerous than hatred of a woman…”
“Vagina of a woman….”
“Vagina…. Correct.”apne jeb se josh wali goli muh me dalkar chooste hue maine
kaha… “arey ye toh kadwi hai…”
“wo sex pills hai, Vandana Rathi ki choot nahi, jise choosega toh maza aayega…
josh aaya…?”
“jeans fatne wala hai…”
“chal phhir ho jaye aaj, do-do round… main toh bolta hoon do-char goli aur
mashak le… jo hoga dekha jayega… jyada se jyada mar jayega aur kya”
Ajmeri bai ka kotha do manzila tha aur jise Daddu ne mere sath Ajmeri bai ke
kothe me bheja tha wo bina kuch bole, bina kisi se kuch puchhe… kothe me dhada-
dhad andar ghusta gaya aur uske peechhe-peechhe main bhi… mera pant itna tana
hua tha ki wo jab bhi peechhe palat kar mujhe dekhta uski nazar mere pant par
apne-aap chali jati, jis-se mujhe yani Shri Arman ko awkward feel ho raha tha…
kyunki ek toh wo launda tha upar se anjaan aur jab ek anjaan ladka… dusare
anjaan ladke ke lawde ko baar-baar dekhe toh kafi ajeeb feel hota hai… uski is
harqat se mujhe uspar shaq bhi hua ki kahi ye Angel Priya toh nahi…. aur ant me
uski in harqato se pareshan hokar maine apne dono hatho se apna lund Dhaka aur
uske peechhe-peechhe andar ghusta chala gaya….
“Ajmeri bai ka kotha toh uski choot ki tarah kafi gahra hai, maine toh socha bhi
nahi tha ki itna andar tak hoga… mere under me Ajmeri bai ka kotha hota toh ek
porn site bana kar ghar baithe laakho kamata. in sari randiyo ki profile banata
aur jaise imdb me actor/actress ki detail hoti hai, waisich inke bhi detail dalta…
inke har porn video ke do review column hote jisme ek critics review hota aur
dusara user review… aur phhir aakhiri me porn video se related jo dusare porn
video hai unki link… IMDB me jaise actor/actress ki height wagerah rahti hai,
waise main apni us site me inke choot aur gand ka size likhta ki kitne diameter ka
gand hai aur choot ka circumference kitna hai vagerah-vagerah… bole toh full
technical….”

314
“yaha toh koyi nahi hai… ye room toh tere dimag ki tarah khali hai…”jab Daddu ka
aadmi mujhe ek room me chhodkar waha se jane laga toh maine us-se kaha…
Jispar wo mujhe ghoorkar aise dekhne laga jaise main Ajmeri ko nahi balki uski
behan ko chodne aaya hoon aur mujhe gusse se apni aankhe dikha-kar waha se
chala gaya… maine andaza lagaya ki shayad Ajmeri thodi der me aayegi, isliye
main room ke aur andar aaya aur bistar par baitha….
“kya bolta hai, 2.0… ho jaye..”
“nahi, energy bacha ke rakh…”
“arey bahut energy hai… bhool mat, we’re Shagmen”5 feet anuman lagakar main
bistar se door gaya aur waha par ek imaginary line kheechi jise sirf main ya phhir
mere jaisa NH-6 Conqueror hee dekh sakta tha…
Imaginary line kheechne ke baad main gate tak gaya aur gate ko chhookar full
speed ke sath bistar ki taraf dauda aur jo imaginary line maine kheechi thi, waha
se seedhe jump mara….
“yeeessss…..”bistar par land karne ke baad maine kaha… aur tabhi room ke andar
halchal hui…
Waha room ke andar ek aur room tha ya phhir shayad bathroom tha… jo bhi ho,
par jaise hee maine bistar par land kiya, room ke andar wala darwaja khula aur
ek puri nangi ladki ne mujhe andar aane ka ishara kiya….
“ye Ajmeri hai….? nahi… ye toh Ajmeri nahi hai par jo bhi hai, maal hai… ab toh
lund bhi khada ho gaya hai aur pura sharir ufaan maar raha hai… ab jo bhi mile…
sab chalega… phhir chahe wo suske doodh wali princy hee kyun na ho…”
Main turant bistar se kooda aur us gate ki taraf badha, jaha se us nangi ladki ne
mujhe ishara kiya tha. room ke andar wo jo room tha, wo bathroom nahi tha, balki
kuch aur hee tha… maine jab waha pahuchkar us room ke andar apni nazar dali
toh dekha ki ek bahut bada hall uske andar tha… waha char-paanch ladkiya thi,
jinke sath na jaane kaun-kaun chudai macha rahe the… koyi sofe par toh, koyi
table par… koyi deewar se satakar toh koyi zameen me letkar… sirf position aur
pose ka fark tha, baki kaam waha chudai ka hee ho raha tha… us nangi ladki ne
mujhe andar aane ke liye kaha. Par ab main hichkicha raha tha ki andar jaun ya
na jaun… sala itne logo ke beech kaun choot marega… after all main ek Yugpurush
hoon aur inhone mera video banakar leak kar diya toh ? na baba na… aise ashleel
kaam main nahi karunga.
“andar aao…”gate par khadi ladki ne ek aur baar mujhe kaha aur phhir palatkar
waha se jaane lagi… maine uski hilti hui kamar dekhi aur sath me uska pichhwada
bhi, jiske baad… maine khud se kaha ki, jo hoga dekha jayega, abhi filhal andar
chalte hai.
Main us room ke andar ghusa aur us pond matka kar chalti hui ladki ke peechhe
chalne laga, jab main room me aage badha toh dekha ki waha room ke andar ek
kone me do-char ladkiyo ko nangi karke latkaya hua tha. unke hath upar chain se
315
baandh diye gaye the aur muh par kala patta baandh diya gaya tha… jinhe waha
mauzood kuch nange aadmi kabhi chod rahe the toh kabhi belt aur hunter se
beech-beech me mar rahe the… un ladkiyo ko hunter se marte dekh mera bhi mann
kiya ki main bhi un ladkiya ko maru… madarchod, itna jam se marunga ki ek hee
war me chamdi ukhad dunga, in randiyo ki…. Sali rakhail… kutiya kahi ki. Inke
gand me toh kohni tak pura hath dal dena chahiye. Tab inka randipan kam hoga.
mujhe kamaan saaunp de toh inke choot me hath dalkar bachcha-dani fad
dunga....
"WHAT THE FUCK... 3.0 ?"
"chup lawda... "
un ladkiyo me se kuch belt aur hunter ki maar se ro rahi thi toh kuch ise enjoy kar
rahi thi par waha ek aisi bhi thi, jo behosh ho chuki thi…. ya phhir mar chuki thi ?
mujhe confirm nahi pata… matlab uske muh se khoon aur laar ka mixture tapak
raha tha aur wo saans bhi nahi rahi thi… yadi wo saans leti toh uska doodh zaroor
koyi movement karta… par wo toh ekdum sithil the.
“abey, ye toh Madhulika hai…” jab main us behosh ho chuki ladki ke paas se guzra
toh maine behosh ho chuki ya us mar chuki ladki ki pahchan Madhulika ke roop me
ki…
“ise bhi maar dala kya Daddu ne ? hadd hai lawda… ye toh mere se bhi bada wala
hai… jise mann me aata hai, use hee pel deta hai… kahi iske baap ne Daddu ko jo
paise ke mamle me dhokha diya kahi uske karan toh ye sab nahi hua ? aur jab
Madhulika ka ye haal hai toh phhir iske baap ko toh boti-boti karke Ganga-
Jamuna ke nale me fekwa diya hoga Daddu ne… betichod, mere saamne uchak
rahe the ye lawde… mar gaye na… mujhe bulana chahiye tha, mar-mar ke maa
chod deta iski… choot-e-choot me belt markar choot fula deta is randi ka… Sali
lund ki pujarin… mere samne badi-badi baat kar rahi thi ki… saheb, mere paas mat
aaya karo, warna barbad ho jaoge…. Ab kya hua, gand fat gayi na.. randi, Sali…
agle janam me phhir chodunga tujhe aur tere baap ko… aur teri maa ko aur teri
beti ko bhi… hatt bitiyachod”
“bas kar be… concentrate on Ajmeri…”
Madhulika ko usi ke haal me chhodkar main aage badha aur thodi der aage
badhne ke baad mujhe phhir se ek room dikhayi diya, jiske andar lejakar us nangi
ladki ne mujhe chhoda aur waha se bahar chali gayi… mere us room me andar
ghusne ke turant baad hee Ajmeri bathroom se bahar nikli… wo sar se lekar pair
tak puri geeli thi, matlab naha kar nikli thi…
Ajmeri ne mujhe dekha aur maine Ajmeri ko… main use dekh kar muskuraya aur
wo mujhe dekhkar muskurayi, par dil se nahi, matlab uski muskan me udasi mix
thi. Ajmeri puri bheegi toh thi par sath hee usne green color ki saree bhi pahan
rakhi thi… mujhe apne saamne dekh dahine hath se saree ko kholte hue mujhe apne
paas aane ka ishara kiya….
Ajmeri ke kale ghane baal jo uske doodh tak lambe the, wo is samay do part me
divide the….ek left side aur dusara right side aur dono side ke beech me wo wala
portion ekdum clear dikh raha tha jaha par aurate sindoor bharti hai… jise main
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aaj apne mutth se bharne wala tha. Ajmeri ke baal ka right side ekdum peechhe
kaan ke uspar chipka hua tha par left side wala hissa ekdum aankh ke saamne
lahlaha raha tha, shayad wo bheegne ke baad apne baal pochh rahi thi par tabhi
maine entry le li… Ajmeri ke sar ke kuch baal blouse ke andar bhi the jise usne
mere saamne blouse se nikala. Wo ab bhi apne dahine hath me saree ka pallu liye,
apni gori chikni gol nabhi se mujhe attract kar rahi thi… lund toh mera full tanka
hua tha aur main is samay bas chodna chahta tha… phhir chahe wo koyi bhi aurat
kyun na ho…. mere pet me ab halka-halka dard bhi shuru ho gaya tha, jise maine
ignore kiya…
.
Jab main kuch der aur wahi khada raha toh Ajmeri ne apne dono hath sar ke
peeche kiye aur mujhe apni clean armpit dikhane lagi…
“two… three… one… ”
"abey chutiye.. two.. three ... one nahi... three... two... one..."
"chup lawda..."
two.. three..one... Counting karke main Ajmeri ki taraf badha aur use jhatke se
wahi peechhe deewar se sata kar uski gardan choomne laga... choomna kya, ye
bolo chatne laga… Maine apne hath se uske pet ko masla aur apni ek ungali uski
nabhi ke andar dalkar apni ungali andar-bahar karne laga…
“ye kya kar raha hai tu…”
“ye mat puuuch ki kya karrr raha hu, ye puch ki kya karunga… fad dalunga teri
aaj…”ek hath se Ajmeri ka muh daba kar dusare hath ki ungaliyo ko uski nabhi me
teji se ghusate hue maine kaha….
Shuru me toh Ajmeri kuch nahi boli, matlab jab maine uska muh band kiya toh
usne koyi virodh nahi kiya, lekin thodi der baad wo mujhe peechhe dhakelne lagi…
lekin maine uske pure sharir ko peechhe deewar me de mara aur upar se apni puri
body se use jakad liya, jiske karan mujhe peechhe dhakelna toh door wo ab hil tak
nahi pa rahi thi. is beech main uski nabhi me lagatar apni ungali andar-bahar kar
raha tha aur main jaise-jaise ye karta Ajmeri bai ki chhat-patahat badhte hee jaa
rahi thi…
Mujhe kafi der baad pata chala ki mere naakhun Ajmeri bai ke nabhi me chhubh
rahe the aur teji ke sath andar bahar karne ke karan Ajmeri bai ki nabhi chhil
chuki thi aur uske nabhi se halka-halka khoon bhi nikalne laga tha….
“I’m sorry…”Ajmeri ko chhod peechhe hat-te hue maine us-se ek pal kaha aur phhir
dusare hee pal use ghaseet kar bistar par patak diya…
Ajmeri ko jab maine first time Ganga-jamuna me dekha tha tabhi mujhe us-se lust
at first sight ho gaya tha… lekin pichhale kayi hafto se usko dekhkar maine itni
baar… itni bhayankar tarike se mutth mara ki ab mujhe kuch khas chodne ka
mann nahi kar raha tha. Ajmeri utni bhi perfect nahi thi… jitna main use imagine
kiya karta tha… matlab uski gaand heart shape ya A-shape na hokar… H-shape me
thi…

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Par kyunki sex pills apna kaam bakhoobi kar rahi thi, isliye bistar par maine uski
ek taang ko turant modkar ek side kiya aur dusari taang ko upar uthaya… jis-se
Ajmeri bistar par tedhi hui aur uski choot mere saamne puri khuli thi, maine aur
koyi vilamb na karte hue seedhe apna lund uski choot ke muhane me rakha aur
puri taqat ke sath shot mara…. Mera ye shot Ajmeri ko kafi pasand aaya aur wo
mere shot padte hee thoda sa hasi…. Shayad mera mazak uda rahi thi. Jiske baad
maine phhir se dum lagakar shot mara aur abki baar wo aur jor se hasi… aisa kayi
baar hua.. main shot pe shot mare jaa raha tha aur wo lagatar hase hee ja rahi thi
“mere se badi psycho toh ye hai… kabhi hasti hai, toh kabhi ekdum se chudte waqt
shant ho jati hai… toh kabhi pyar se bolti hai ki aur chod…”Ajmeri ki choot me
pura lund dalkar us-se chipakte hue maine socha…
Ajmeri ko thodi der isi position me pelne ke baad maine socha ki position change
kar leni chahiye… kyunki mujhe dar tha ki shayad koyi chupke se ye sab record
kar raha hoga aur main nahi chahta ki jo bhi ye video dekhe ,wo ye bole ki lawda is
hero ko toh kuch aata hee nahi tha, ek hee position me jhad gaya… isliye position
change karna zaroori tha. aakhirkar main hero hoon… bf wala hee sahi… par hero
toh hero hai… isliye maine Ajmeri ko chodna band kiya aur uske ek side letkar aur
use, apne side me litakar uske dono pairo ko modkar bistar par thoda upar kiya,
jis-se uski mast badi gand choot ke sath puri ki puri dikhne lagi…. Ajmeri turant
samajh gayi ki ab main kya karne wala hoon, main kaha lund dalne wala hoon…
isliye wo thoda sa apni kohni ke dum par uthi aur apne muh se thook nikalkar
apne gand par malne lagi… phhir usne apne hath se apni choot ko dabaya…
“dal de ek baar me aur dalne ke baad rukna mat… itna maza dungi ki zindagi bhar
tere dimag me meri gand ghoomegi… randwe…”
“kitna chudwati hai tu raand… par hai ekdum tanaka…”uski gand par apna lund
rakhkar lund se uski gand ko sahlate hue maine kaha aur dheere-dheere andar
dalne laga…
“dal na, bhosdike…”
“chup be… tu randi hai lekin main randa nahi hoon… upar se ye pet dard…”
Main dheere-dheere apna lund uski gand me dalne laga aur phhir jaise hee maine
ek jordar dhakka mara Ajmeri ka muh aise ho gaya, jaise aajkal ki ladkiya selfie
lete waqt apna muh banati hai… wo aise hee apne honth pichka kar apne gand me
mera lund lete rahi aur is dauran uski nazar ek baar bhi apne gand se nahi hati….
Jo tablets maine khayi thi, wo apna pura asar dikha rahi thi… jiske karan main
bahut der tak, is pose me bhi Ajmeri ki leta raha… mujhe is samay sirf teen hee chiz
dikh rahi thi… Ajmeri ki choot, Ajmeri ki bhari bharkam H-shaped gand aur mera
lund…. Iske aalawa mujhe kuch nahi soojh raha tha… main ek baar jis position me
Ajmeri ko litakar chodna shuru karta toh kafi der tak chodta rahta… itni der tak ki
Ajmeri mujhe rukne ke liye kahti aur phhir… phhir se apna muh pichka kar mujhe
chodne ke liye kahti….
.
Maine phhir se position change ki aur abki baar uske dono pair uthakar Ajmeri bai
ko apni taraf khiskaya. Wo is baar apni dono kohni ko bistar par rakhkar thoda
upar uthi aur mujhe choomne lagi… mujhe halanki ye pasand nahi aaya par

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kyunki main use abhi bahut chodna chahta tha, isliye main ye sah gaya aur jo
gussa mere andar tha, use lund ke through uski choot me transfer karne laga…..
“ye ladkiyo ko aise baandh kar mar kyun rahe hai….”uske honth, apne honth se
alag karke maine puchha…
“tujhe us-se kya matlab… tu mujhe pel aur nikal yaha se.”
“chakli kahi ki… wo toh main isliye puchh raha tha kyunki mujhe kafi sukoon mila
ye dekh kar… main bhi isme shamil hona chahta hoon… aisa ghuma ke hunter
marunga ki, next time mujhe dekhte hee moot maregi ye rakhail…. Choot ke andar
hath dalkar bachcha-dani nikal lunga…”
“tu choot ke raaste bachcha-dani faaaaaaaaadega…. Aur jorrr se… aur jorrrr laga
ladke…”
“unme se ek mere pahchan ki hai… matlab pahchan ki nahi hai, bas do-teen baar
uske gaal me mutth mara hai… uski gand tere se mast hai, teri toh gand…gand
nahi ghosla hai… ekdum naram. Lekin uski… ekdum….Tight thi….”Ajmeri ki choot
se lund nikalkar hafte hue maine kaha aur apna pet dabane laga…
“ye sab ek kanoon hai , jo bhi chakli yaha se nikalna chahti hai, use ye sab sahna
padta hai… aur jo log unhe marte hai… wo sab bahut bade-bade log hai, jo pani ki
tarah paisa bahate hai…”
“tere sath bhi hua tha kya aisa…”
“maine hee ye niyam shuru kiya hai… mere yaha aane se pahle ye sab niyam nahi
tha…”
“gazab…”bolkar main utha aur uthkar Ajmeri ki chhati par ja baitha…
“ab kya meri chuchiyo ko chodega kya…”
“nahi… tere mu ko…”bolkar maine dono hatho se Ajmeri ka sar pakad kar thoda
upar uthaya aur uske honth par apna lund sparsh karne laga….
“mu khol na… kyun itna bhav kha rahi hai… main roj-roj nahi aaunga… soch le…”
“pahle tu mere sawal ka jawab de…”mere lund ko apne hath se rok-kar Ajmeri boli
“tune Daddu ko ye kyun bola ki tu mujhe chodna chahta hai, yadi main na kar deti
aur gusse me Daddu ko tujhe marne ke liye kahti toh tujhe pata hai Daddu tujhe
marne se pahle ek pal ke liye bhi nahi sochta.... tujhe dar nahi lagta kya…”
“mujhe bhagwan ne special power di hai…”Ajmeri ke hath se apna lund chhudakar

wapas uske honth me ragadte hue maine kaha “ main ladkiyo ki shakl dekh-kar
unka bhavishya jaan leta hu ki wo mujhse chudengi ya nahi…aur tuuuu…. Us din
jab tune Daddu ke adde me mazak-mazak me mera hath pakda tha, tabhi main
samajh gaya tha ki tujhe kya chahiye…. Aur wahi mujhe bhi chahiye tha. par
dikkat Daddu ki thi… kyunki yadi main uski permission ke bina tujhe thokta aur
Daddu jaan jata toh meri aisi taisi kar deta… isliye maine itne din intezaar kiya

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aur tere naam ki mutthi mar… par aaj….. chal ab muh khol na. aur ekdum ragad ke
choos… aise choos jaise ki aaj ke baad lund hee nahi payegi choosne ke liye….”
“sale harami…”jaise hee Ajmeri ne mujhe ye gali dene ke liye apna muh khola…
maine apna lund uske muh me bhar diya aur uski choochiyo ko puri taqat ke sath
masalte hue use lund choosane laga….
Ajmeri bai ne mera lund jo choosna chalu kiya wo aakhir tak choosti rahi aur
phhir jab main uske muh me jhad gaya toh thodi der tak tak muh me kulla karte
hue usne apna purse jo sirhane me rakha tha use jaldi se kholkar usme se ek chhota
sa kale rang ka dibba nikal kar pura sperm apne muh se us dibbi me bhar di
“full jugad leke chalti hai tu toh…”ek hath se apna pet aur ek hath se apna sar
dabate hue maine kaha… “khali pet pills nahi leni chahiye thi… ye toh har seconds
ke sath meri fadte jar aha hai… waise mast purse hai…”
“muh me lene ka maja hee kuch aur hai… jab tak mere muh me safed pani na jaye
tab tak mujhe santushti nahi milti…. Daddu hota toh pee leti uska…”
Mere jhadne ke baad mere lund ko jhuk jana chahiye tha, lund ka natural law toh
yahi hai… lekin maine jo tablets ka cocktail mara tha, uska asar itna bhayankar
tha ki sala lund jhukne ka naam hee nahi le raha tha… jispar maine Ajmeri ki taraf
dekha aur….
“bathroom me degi…”
“tujhme ab bhi dum hai…”
“ye dekh…”
“hmmm….”
Phhir kya tha, hum dono bathroom me ek sath nange ghuse… actually ek sath
nahi… pahle Ajmeri bathroom me ghusi jiske 5 minute baad main bathroom me
ghusa aur un 5 minutes me main apna pet dabate hue Ajmeri ka purse khol-kar
dekhta raha…. Phhir main bhi bathroom me ghusa… apna pet pakad kar.
Main Ajmeri ko is samay bas chodna chahta tha… bas chodna… mere dimag me is
samay sirf ek chiz thi… actually do thi… nahi ek hee thi…. aur wo thi Ajmeri ki
choot… main uski maang mutth se bharna chahta tha aur apne Shagman ke naam
ko aur bulandi pe pahuchana chahta tha… main use itna chodna chahta tha, itni
jor se chodna chahta tha ki wo hag mare…lol.
Par jaise hee bathroom me ghusa toh pet me itni jor se cramps aaye ki main pet
pakad kar pahle wahi baitha aur phhir farsh par lotne laga….
“is baar nahi bachunga…”dono hath se apna pet dabate hue maine kaha…
Maine puri zindagi kya kiya.. kyun kiya… ye samay dar samay badalta raha lekin
randiyo se main shuru se hee beinteha nafrat karta hoon… phhir chahe wo Varun
ki girlfriend Sonam hee kyun na ho… lekin jab Ajmeri bai ne mujhe uthaya aur
sahara dekar bathroom ke bahar le gayi toh meri vichar-dhara thodi badalne
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lagi… lekin jaise hee dard kam hua, nafrat phhir se peak pe pahuch gayi… main
kapde pahankar khada hua aur thodi der Ajmeri ke purse ko ghoorta raha…
Ajmeri ne pani ka ek bottle mujhe diya, lekin maine nahi liya…
“mar jaunga, lekin randi ke hath ka pani nahi piyunga…”
Main thodi der aur waha shanti se khada raha aur phhir bahar ki taraf dheere-
dheere chal pada… bahar jate waqt ek baar phhir se mere pet me cramps aaye...
maine apni aankhe band ki aur dono hath se pet pakad kar bahar ki taraf bhagne
laga….
“mar jayega be.. bhosdiwale… rook ja… cramps jaane de… ”
Lekin main nahi ruka aur bahar ki oor bhagta raha… jiske karan bhagte hue ek-do
baar main gira bhi... mujhe pata nahi kya ho raha tha, par mera pet ukhad raha
tha aur sar bhi ghoom raha tha… maine kal pura din kuch nahi khaya tha aur
phhir aaj wo sex-pills… lagta hai reaction ho raha hai.. isiliye itni thandi me bhi
mujhe paseena aa raha tha…. mujhe aisa lag raha tha jaise kisi ne mera pet pakad
kar jor se marod raha ho… ye pahli baar mere sath ho raha tha. kash baap ki baat
maankar MBBS kiya hota toh ye toh pata hota ki ab kya karna hai…. khamkha
Engineering kar li, lawda… koyi use hee nahi… bapu toh 80 lakhs donation dene ko
bhi taiyar tha..
“phhir 8th semester kaise banti…”
“haan, wo toh hai…”
Maine Ajmeri bai ke kothe se nikalkar aanan-fanan me ek autowale ko hath diya

aur us auto wale ke rukte hee andar ghusa aur is process me chutiyo ki tarah auto
me hee gir gaya… jise dekhkar Autowala utarkar peechhe aaya aur mujhe peechhe
wali seat me litaya….
“kya hua…”
“pata nahi, pet akad raha hai, aisa lag raha hai jaise koyi apna badla nikalne ke
liye liver daba raha hai… badla, Vivek…kahi Vivek ne apna badla toh nahi liya ?
nahi wo tablets toh maine khud mangi thi… Vivek ne toh kaha bhi tha ki ek baar me
sirf ek aur dusari lene ke liye kuch din ka gap… maine hee role-role me teen-char
mashak liya…”
“chhodna kaha hai…”
“RVC”
“RVC.. ye kaha hai…”
“mere lawde me hai…”chillakar maine kaha…
“dekh, izzat se baat kar… tera karja nahi khaya hoon main…”
“RVC matlab… River view colony…”

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“utni door main nahi jaunga… bahut door hai. aur jaunga toh 500 lunga…”
“hazar le lena, ab toh chal”
Autowale ne auto daudaya aur main peechhe wali seat par paseene se tar-batar
hokar dono hath se apna pet dabaye ek konte me kaanp raha tha… mujhe ab bhi
yahi lag raha tha ki koyi mera liver , kidney jor-jor se daba raha hai… ye toh pahle
kabhi nahi hua tha, ye kaun si bimari hai….. sala, gand fat gayi re… aaj ke baad
kabhi wo tablets nahi khaunga…. Vivek ki maa ka. Chutiya, sala…. Marunga
madarchod ko.
Maine kaanpte hue apni aankhe band ki aur kaanpte hue hee jab thodi der baad
jab meri aankhe khuli toh main apne college hostel ke us jung lagi bench par baitha
hua tha…
“hey Arman…”
“hii…. Arun, no sorry… hii… Es…Esssh… Esha… hiii… howww…. How… are
yoooou… you… you… Esha… hiii… hello… main… main … Arman… hi ”apna pet
dabate hue maine kaha “matlab, tum yaha… kaa..kamal ho gaya ye toh… matlab,
finally…. Matlab…. mujhe pata hota ki mere tablet khane se tum yaha aaogi toh
main kab ka wo tablet kha leta, I love you…”
“really….? maine Gautam ke sath milkar jo kiya uske baad bhi…”
“it doesn’t matter what you did or what you do….iii”
“you love me and you’ll always do…”meri line complete karte hue Esha boli
“kamal hai… ye line toh maine mann me kahi thi… tumhe kaise pata chali…”
“here, what you know, we all know…”mere pet se mera hath hatakar apna hath
rakhte hue Esha boli…
“Arun kaha hai…”
“wo chala gaya, usne kaha ki jab tak main yaha rahungi, wo tumse milne nahi
aayega… wo mujhse kafi nafrat karta hai, kya tum bhi…”
“main…? Nahi… main nahi… wo jalta hai sala, gay……. tumhe mere paas
dekhkar…”
“thoda-bahut… shayad isiliye usne tumhe ye nahi bataya ki main kafi samay se
yaha hoon… maine Arun ko bahut baar kaha ki wo Arman ko bol de ki main yaha
aa chuki hoon… kyunki main jaanti thi ki tum kya soch rahe ho. yaha hum sab
tumse connected hai… aur kafi din se tumhara college aane ka intezaar kar rahe
hai. lekin Arun ne kisi ko yaha nahi aane diya, jo bhi tumse milne ke liye hostel ki
taraf aata, wo use marne lagta…. Wo hamesha college aur hostel ko milane wali
sadak par khada rahta hai, taki koyi bahar ka yaha na aa sake…”

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“par tumne toh abhi kaha ki hum sab ek-dusare se connected hai, phhir mujhe ye
kyun nahi pata chala ki tum yaha aa chuki ho aur Arun ye sab kar raha hai…. ?”
“hum sab tumhari soch ko jaan sakte hai, lekin tum kisi ki bhi nahi…. Creator loss”
“Arun ne tumhe kyun nahi roka…”
“usne bahut koshish ki mujhe rokne ki par ant me wo haar maan gaya, wo
mujhpar hath nahi utha sakta… aur na hee mujhe kuch ulta-seedha bol sakta hai…
due to your friendynamic law…”
“friendynamic law works here… ?”chauk kar maine puchha “wo law toh kuch
mahine pahle mere hee dwara tod diya gaya tha…”
“this is ideal world… yaha raat nahi hoti, 24 hours college chalta hai, gravity ki
value 9.8 nahi balki 8.9 hai, hostel ke ladke yaha ke malik hai, wo hee decide karte
hai ki yaha kya hoga aur Gautam aur Aradhna yaha exist nahi karte… unka koyi
nam-o-nishan tak nahi hai… na toh admission slip me aur na hee kahi aur ya phhir
hostel ke ladko ne un dono ko mere aane se pahle hee maar diya hai… ya phhir
tumne…”
“maine, unhe nahi mara….yadi maine un dono ko mara hota, toh tumhe pata
hota…”
“oh haan… correct”
“aur… isiliye tum mere paas aayi, kyunki yaha Gautam nahi hai… toh tumne socha
ki Gautam na sahi, Arman sahi… matlab aaj bhi main tumhari second choice
hoon…”
“sach kahu toh tum third choice the”
“third ? really ”chauk kar maine kaha “ main tumhari third choice tha… second
kaun tha….”
“Sidar….”
.
“ooo bhiya… aa gaya tumhara kaloni…”mujhe uthate hue us autowale ne kaha…
Chapter-31: OverRun
“thoda der aur rook jata toh… tera kya bigad jata…”ek aankh aadhi kholkar main
auto se pet pakad kar bahar aaya… mera pet me abhi bhi halke-halke cramps aa
rahe the, par ab ye cramps jhelebal the, matlab pahle ki tarah unjhelebal nahi, inhe
main jhel sakta tha….
Meri shirt ki jeb me jitney rupaye the wo sab maine autowale ke muh me fek ke
mara(literally) aur apna pet pakad ke Colony wali sadak par chal diya….
.

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Pahle Deepika mam, phhir Aradhna, phhir Nisha uske baad Madhulika aur aaj
Ajmeri… total 5 hui… agli kaun hogi…. VR ? par sabse jyada maja toh Deepika
mam ko chodne me aaya tha… aur aaj bhi maine us-se jyada sexy item nahi dekhi…
pata nahi randi abhi kiska lawda apni pond me le rahi hogi par kya mast bezzati
karke college se nikalwaya tha, randi ko…. Shri Arman se khelne chali thi..
logo ko samajhna chahiye ki jo ye sochte hai ki wo Shri Arman se khel rahe hai wo
darasal Arman se nahi khud se khel rahe hote hai. mujhe haraya nahi ja sakta,
Mujhe sirf mara ja sakta hai… wo bhi dhoke se. kyunki bina dhokhe ke toh main
tumhari gand mar lunga…
apne flat ki taraf jaate hue mujhe Vandana Rathi bhi dikhi, jo apne gate ke saamne
kisi se baat kar rahi thi… maine use dekha, usne mujhe dekha…. Main use dekhkar
muskuraya par wo mujhe dekhkar apna daant peesne lagi. Phhir main aage badh
gaya… maine apne room ka darwaja khola toh mujhe saamne Aradhna dikhayi
di…
“kaisi hai behan ki lawdi….”use dekhkar muskurate hue maine socha…. “behan ki
lawdi kahi ye bhi toh mere mind se connected nahi hai…. warna aisi-taisi kar degi
meri…”
“connected hoon….”meri soch me dakhalandazi karte hue Aradhna ne apni kameej

upar uthayi aur apne payjame ka nada apni ungali me fasakar hilate hue boli “
toh, finally, wo aapko mil hee gayi…”
“tujhe pata tha… hai na, tujhe pata tha ki… wo waha pahle se hai, lekin phhir bhi
tune mujhe nahi bataya…”
“I know, what you know… aapko nahi pata tha matlab mujhe bhi nahi pata
tha…”itna bolkar Aradhna ne apne payjame ka nada kheech diya aur uska
payjama earth ke gravitation ke karan neeche ja gira…. apni gori-gori, chikni-
chikni, badi-badi jaangho par hath pherkar usne mujhe invite kiya…
“kya tujhe pata nahi ki abhi thodi der pahle main kis halat me tha… ? aur uske
baad bhi…? Ab toh iske koyi sawal hee nahi…. Isliye apna payjama utha le…”waha
se langdate-langdate bedroom me jaate hue maine kaha…..
“ye toh kitchen hai…”
Is tarah main ek-do baar aur bedroom ki taalash me galat room me ghusta raha,
yaha tak ki ek baar toh flat ke bahar bhi ja pahucha aur phhir Tikdam lagakar
bedroom me pahucha…. mujhe is samay aag taapne ka kafi mann kar raha tha,
isliye maine bistar ka ek paya toda aur uspar daru chhidak-kar bedroom ke beech-
o-beech aag jalayi… phhir maine farsh me bed ko patak-patak kar, deewar se
bistar ko takra-takra kar dusara paya bhi toda aur usme bhi same process…. Yani
ki daru chhidak-kar aag jalayi… aur kambal oodhkar wahi aag ke paas deewar se
satkar baith gaya aur puri raat aise hee baitha raha….
“main itna akela kyun hoon. Maine apne liye kabhi aisa toh nahi socha tha…”room
ke beech-o-beech jalti aag ki lapto ko dekh kar maine khud se kaha…
“if you are alone then you’re strong…”

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“yeah… aaj toh mutth bhi nahi mar sakta..”

.
Subah uthkar maine deewar par khud se banaye calendar par aaj ki taarikh par
gola mara kyunki aaj main apni aakhiri loot karne wala tha. uske baad…. Sab
khatm. Aaj bas successful ho jaun, phhir koyi kabhi jaan tak nahi payega ki Shri
Arman ne logo ko lootne ka kaam bhi kiya tha… par iske liye mujhe full planning ki
awashyakta thi na ki last time ki tarah…. Jaha mujhe apni puri raat nadi ke beech
me bitani padi thi… main taiyar hokar bahar aaya aur muh me ek side cigarette
fasakar gate lock karne laga….
“toh tune decide kar liya ki tu zindagi bhar Sharda Enterprises me ghisega….”
“nadi ke beech me raat guzarne se toh achchha hai ki main Vandana Rathi ke flat
ke bagal me rahte hue waha kaam karu, jaha mujhe uski gand dikhe…. Waise
Sharda Enterprise utna bura bhi nahi hai….”
“waha ke log bure hai…”
“mujhse bhi jyada….?”
“tujhe jyada toh nahi par bure toh hai hee… ab is VR ko hee dekh le, jabran hawa
me udti rahti hai… us princy ko dekh, kaise jaggu jaise ladko ki gand marte rahti
hai aur ab toh ek aur boss aa gayi hai teri… kya name hai uska Shivakant Sehgal ki
laundiya ka… jis-se teri muthbhed hui thi… ye sab… bure hai”
“bad need to be punished by worse… aur main kahi bhi jaun, bure log toh milenge
hee isliye future ki future me dekhenge…. Filhal tujhe pata hai kya ki main apna
room lock karke yaha kyun khada hoon…?”
“taaki jab Rathi office ke liye nikle toh tujhe dekh sake… teri sab mutth-giri jaanta
hoon main… tu yadi us din Rathi ko dekhkar mutth nahi marta aur jaanwaro ki
tarah khana nahi khata toh shayad wo khud pahal karti kisi na kisi tarike se….
lekin tune toh mutth mar diya uske saamne…. Sala, mutth-man”
“as if I care…”
“wo dekh…aa gayi teri, agli shikar…”
Vandana Rathi apne room se nikli, mujhe cigarette peete hue dekha aur phhir car
me baithkar chali gayi… koyi reaction nahi. Wo aise behave kar rahi thi jaise
mujhe jaanti tak na ho. mana ki maine jo kaam kiya hai wo kafi neech kaam tha…
par kisi mahan purush ne kaha tha ki dusaro ke sath waisa hee bartav karo jaisa ki
tum dusaro se apeksha rakhte ho… aur maine Rathi ke saamne mutth mara,
kyunki yadi wo bhi mere saamne mutth marti toh main bur nahi manta… is tarah,
yadi dekha jaye toh maine us raat koyi galat kaam nahi kiya tha.
.
Main Sharda Enterprises pahucha aur jaise hee apni jagah jakar virajman hua toh
meri table par ek invitation card rakha hua tha…

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“kahi ye us party ka card toh nahi jo Sharda Enterprises me hone wali hai… jiske
baare me jaggu us din canteen me mujhe bata raha tha…”
maine invitation card khola…. mujhea aaj se 12 din baad Sharda Enterprises me
hone wali party ke liye invite kiya gaya tha. maine invitation card me apna name
dekha… usme Arman ki bajay Armaan likha hua tha.
“anpadh sale, madarchod… lawda jayega mera”invitation card dustbin me fek-kar

maine apna computer on kiya….
“design… design…. Plan design… kaise karu aaj ki aakhiri loot. Venue kaun sa
chunu. Last Time wala kafi door tha aur kafi andhera bhi… wo venue thik nahi aur
jab waha loot ho chuki hai toh ye bhi jayaj hai ki Police ki patrolling waha bhi
hone lagi hogi aur shayad us-se bhi aage… isliye main kuch bhi karu, last time
wala plan flop hai aur idhar colony ke paas karne me dikkat ye hai ki yaha toh
hamesha hee police van khadi rahti hai…. phhir kya kiya jaye… kuch toh sochna
hoga… dikkat ye nahi ki police mujhe pakad legi… mere bahar aane ka plan toh
pahle se hee taiyar hai… par dikkat ye hai ki yadi police walo ne mujhe on the spot
pel diya toh ? waise bhi kafi khunnas me honge… khaskar ke mere ambulance
lootne ke baad…. Isliye jo sochunga wahi hona chahiye, warna yadi thoda sab hi
19, 20 hua toh khel khatm….”
“Hiii… Armaan… good morning”mere bagal wale computer ke samne baith-te hue
ek ladki boli… par ye kaise mumkin hai….
is office me Koyi anjaan mujhse kaise baat kar sakta hai, wo bhi ek ladki… kahi
main ise jaanta toh nahi ? ye na toh VR hai aur na hee Princy… phhir kaun hai…
jisne sakshat Shri Arman se baat karne ki jurrat ki…
“abey canteen wali hai…”
“kaun canteen wali…”
“abey wahi… jiske sath Jaggu teri setting jama dega bol raha tha… phhir ye tere
paas aakar tujhse ladi bhi thi,tune isko sorry bhi bola tha….”
“ yad hai mujhe… main toh bas khud se mazak kar raha tha, you know how funny I
am…”
Sharda Enterprises ke sare workers ek bade se hall me kaam karte the, jaha unko
jhat barabar space diya gaya tha… jise fir charo taraf se dhayi foot wood se pack
kiya gaya tha… jiske andar gol-gol ghoomne wali ek revolving chair, kariya rang
ka ek computer rakha rahta tha…. aur kuch zaroori saman bhi... jaise dustbin.
Mujhe uska name yad nahi tha par jab wo bagal me baithi aur mujhe good
morning kaha toh main uska name sochne laga… uske dahine hath me coffee thi
aur baye hath me news paper… usne is samay jo kapda pahan rakha tha mujhe
maloom nahi par jo bhi pahna tha, ghutne tak hee tha. maine kuch second uski
jaangho ko bhi ghoora… phhir uske kapdo ke bahar se uski choot ko dekhkar
imagine karne laga ki uski choot… choot hai ya phhir bhosda… maine andaza
lagana chalu kiya…

326
“ye school life me set ho gayi hogi 11th-12th me… chalo thoda relaxation de deta
hoon aur ise iske college ke first year me set karwata hoon… first year me 20-30
baar, second year me 60-70 baar aur phhir uske baad…. yani... ”
“I said , hello…”mujhe apni taraf ghoorte dekh wo item boli…
“hhhhh…..”
“tum haklate ho….”coffee ka peg table par rakhte hue wo boli, jispar maine uski
jaangho se apni najre hatayi aur bina kuch bole apne computer ki taraf dekhne
laga… par mera dhyan ab bhi wahi, uski taraf hee tha
.
phhir maine samne rakhi file kholi aur use padhne laga...
Ye kaha se aa gayi… aise hee exam me ek ladki bagal me baithi thi, sala pure teen
ghante paper likhte waqt lund khada rahta tha aur yaha to 7-8 ghante….aise me
toh mera lund tootkar neeche gir jayega… sala ab office me bhi mutth marna
padega, taki ye mera khada lund na dekh sake… kahi main iske saamne bhi mutth
na mar du.. Is-se achchha toh wo pahle wala mota tha… jo mujhse darker chup toh
rahta tha aur apne kaam se kaam rakhta tha… ab ye kaha se aa gayi aur mere
bagal me kyun…….
Mere nazar ab bhi meri file me thi par dhyan us nayi laundiya par hee tha… mere
dwara use ignore karne ke mere ravvaye par wo thoda naraz thi par apne
computer par apni nazre gadaye wo shayad tirachhi nazar se dekh rahi thi… maine
bhi ek tirachhi nazar us par dali aur hum dono ki tirachhi nazar takra gayi…
“hatt madarchod, bezzati ho gayi…”turant dusari taraf dekh kar maine version 2.0
se kaha….
.
“hi, main Supriya… Supriya Sehgal…”mere taraf apna hath badhate hue wo boli…
“Supriya… Supriya… SuuuuuuuPriya…. Sehgal… utna acha name nahi hai… mera
name suno Arman… Shri Arman …. Name aisich hona chahiye, kaha Supriya-
vupriya type ka name rakhte ho… ab tum bologi ki… awwww, isme meri kya galti
hai, par galti tumhari hee hai… mujhe dekho, maine apna name khud rakha hai…
jab main bahut chhota tha… tab mere ghar ke aas-paas wale bhaiya mera
admission karane school le gaye the… waha unhone kaha ki iska name Pankaj
hai… lekin tabhich apun ne bola ki.. mera name Arman rahega…”us-se hath milate
hue maine kaha…
“abey hath kyun milaya us-se… kahi gand khujakar aayi hogi toh…”
“toh main bhi toh mutth markar aaya hoon… ”
“tumhare bare me thik hee bataya tha logo ne… par tum muskura kyun rahe ho…
kya mere face par kuch laga hai…. ya phhir…”
“nahi…”
“toh phhir kyun muskura rahe ho…”

327
“nahi bataunga… aur mujhse na aap karke baat kiya kar… kyunki main yaha tera
senior hoon”
“par haqiqat me toh…main tumhari senior hoon… kyunki main yaha recruit hokar
nahi aayi hoon… balki mera yaha transfer hua hai aur jo yaha is jagah par kaam
karte the… wo tumse senior the… pahle main Sharda Enterprises ki Ahembdabad
ke head office me thi aur char saal waha kaam karne ke baad apna transfer yaha
kara liya… kyunki yaha mere dad Shivakant Sehgal bhi rahte hai…. kuch week
pahle hee unka bhi transfer yaha hua hai…”
“phhir toh tumhari MAA ka bhi transfer hua hoga… matlab full family job me…
mast hai… kabhi NH-6 me milo raat ke waqt phhir…”
“meri maa housewife hai…”mere bolne ke dhang se thoda khafa hokar wo boli…
“bur maan gayi… lawda”
“maine suna nahi”
“kyunki maine kuch kaha hee nahi…”
“nahi tumne abhi kuch kaha… mujhe dekhkar…”
“actually main tumhara name yad kar raha tha….”
“Supriya… Sehgal”
“Supriya… hmm… means well-loved”
“beautiful name… isn’t it?”Apni coffee khatm karke wo muskurayi aur mouse ko
hath me pakda…
“ beautiful is the ugliest word I have heard in my entire life… so, in this way your
name is…. ahem ahem ”
“how the hell… you…”Supriya ka matha thanka par usne khud ki jeebh fisalne nahi
di aur lambi-lambi saanse bharkar saamne computer ko refresh maarne lagi…
phhir wo ekdum se shant baithi kuch sochne lagi…. Wo shayad ye soch rahi thi ki
aise kaise koyi us-se baat kar sakta hai… jaha uske name ko pahli hee baar me koyi
ugliest name ka darja de de… usne kabhi socha tak nahi hoga ki koyi uski jaisi item
ki bhi insult kar sakta hai wo bhi uska junior…
.
Logo ko samajhna chahiye ki main unse baat karne me koyi interested nahi hoon…
unhe mujhse bilkul bhi baat nahi karni chahiye. Mere aas-paas wo jab bhi rahe toh
apni aukaat me rahe… jyada chu-chakari mujhe pasand nahi. Par aksar ye log
bhool jate hai… lagta hai mujhe apne mathe par ‘MISANTHROPE’ ka label lagana
padega… taki jo bhi aaye mujhse baat na kare… ab is kanya ko hee dekh lo, kaise
mere pahal na karne ke bawzood apni gand uchka-uchka kar udta hua teer gand
me lene ki koshish kar rahi thi… aur jab maine teer dal diya toh gand fulakar baith
gayi…

328
“Too much thinking about anyone could result in hatred.” Supriya ko taana marte
hue maine kaha… “dil pe mat lo.. it is me… you’ll get used to it..”
“Vandana mam ne bataya tha ki main tumse thoda door rahu… tumhe ajeeb-ajeeb
daure padte hai. phhir unhone wo video bhi dikhaya tha jisme yaha upar se neeche
koodkar… deewar se khud-ba-khud takra rahe the…unhone ye bhi bataya ki RVC
me tum unke bagal wale flat me rahte ho aur puri raat sote nahi… tum-me koyi
manners nahi hai… tumhe Vandana mam jald hee nikalne wali hai… shayad tumne
aaj ke newspaper me new designer ka advertisement nahi dekha….”saamne se
news papar utha kar apne hath me hilate hue wo boli
“kya fark padta hai….”Supriya ke hath se ek jhatke me newspaper chheen kar

maine kaha…
“tumhe ye jaankar dukh hua, hai na…”
“thoda-thoda…. Kyunki Sharda Enterprises me mast mahol tha… par koyi baat
nahi kyunki jab main yaha se chala jaunga tab main 24x7 hours apne room me
bitaunga… kitna maza aayega tab… alone, strong… ”
“toh tum dukhi bhi ho aur khush bhi…”
“well, that’s my first characteristic… I can be both happy and sad at the same
Time…”
“good luck”apna hath meri taraf badhakar Supriya boli…
maine phhir se apna mutth marne wala hath Supriya ke hath se milaya par jab
Supriya thodi khisiya gayi tab mujhe samajh aaya ki usne apna hath mujhse hath
milane ke liye nahi balki newspaper lene ke liye badhaya tha… back to back
bezzati.
“tumne itna bhari makeup kyun kiya hai… mera matlab simple cream-powder laga
kar bhi toh aa sakti ho na…. uspar se ye duniya bhar ka… tumhari salary toh isi me
khatm ho jati hogi… ”
“excuse me… tumse koyi matlab…”
“ Time… dear time… time is our most powerful weapon and you’re just wasting it to
apply lipstic in your lips… kitna taiyar hokar aayi hai, zaroor 6 baje se makeup
karne baith jati hogi… ”
“shut up… ”
“aur baal, ye hai kaun se rang ka… lol”
“chup rahne ka kya loge….”
“choot……”maine kaha…… mann me.
“dobara mujhse baat mat karna… main tum ladkiyo ko achchhi tarah se jaanta
hoon, handsome-smart ladka dekha nahi ki line marna chalu ho jati ho… lekin
329
main us type ka nahi hoon…. Main Arman hoon…”khada hokar waha se jaane ki
taiyari karte hue maine Supriya se kaha “aur koyi mere baare me puchhe toh bol
dena ki Arman ji ka mood thoda kharab tha toh wo ghar ko nikal gaye hai aur wo
apna kaam ghar me karke yogi-jogi ko mail kar denge….”
“unaccompanied… Alone… deserted… friendless… you and your shadow…. These

are the things they told me about you… but I’m still wondering… why, I mean
why… anyone would like to spend his life alone.”
“question is not why but why not…”Esha ko yaad karte hue maine kaha…
“sorry…?”
“I mean… the question is not why I don’t like people but why should I like them…
find the reasons till our next meet and I’ll answer… aur ek baat… I’m not alone…
I’m a Narcissist…”
Meri last loot ka date maine aaj fix kar rakha tha, isliye Sharda Enterprises se E-6
aakar maine sabse pahle office ka kaam niptaya aur yogi-jogi ko mail karke bistar
ke baki bache do paye bhi ukhad kar unme aag lagakar wahi uske paas chair me
baitha aur sochane laga… tabhi mujhe ek number se call aaya… aur maine kuch
purane news paper se Bairangi ki kayi photos katkar room se bahar nikla…. Par
pahle main ek chhoti si workshop me gaya, waha apna kaam niptaya aur us shaks
se mila, jisne mujhe phone kiya tha… phhir main wapsi me Vivek ke paas gaya, use
marne nahi balki uski help lene…. is beech jab main apna pura kaam nipta kar
wapas room pahucha toh mujhe ahsaas hua ki maine toh aaj bhi kuch nahi khaya
tha, isi liye pet me dard ho raha hai… mera sar thoda-thoda ghoomne laga tha…
farsh aur chhat hilti hui ya phhir kahu ki vibrate hote hue dikh rahi thi….
“bhookha toh nahi marna chahega….”
“order kiya hai… aata hoga..”
Khana khane ke baad mujhe kafi aaram mila… matlab bahut jyada… itna jyada ki
mujhe neend tak aane lagi. Maine headphone fasakar apni aankhe band ki… kafi
sukoon mila… main kafi der tak aise hee chair par peechhhe sar tikaye leta raha
aur phhir jaise kisi ne peechhe se meri gardan pakddi aur tod di….
“uth be….”
“Aaaalund tuuu…. HL … I mean, hii lawda”
“KL… matlab , kya lawda…. suna hai aakhiri bar tu Esha se mila tha…”
“nahi… kisne kaha…”
“tu mujhse jhooth nahi bol sakta… and by the way, I know… what you know. ”
“you bhi know, what I know… aise me main tujhe chodu kaise banaunga… tu toh
pahle hee sab jaan jayega…”

330
“ jaan-buch kar ban jaunga aur Esha bahar hai, usi jung lagi bench par… jaha hum
dono mile the… mujhe pata hai tu wahi uske paas jane wala hai… tu use bhoolta
kyun nahi be…”
“koshish jaari hai…”
“kya gunda banoge… ”
“toh chalu…”
“bas beta, maal kya mili… dost ko bhool gaye”
“that’s Shri Arman for you, bitches and call me The Originator”bahar jate hue
maine apne mann me kaha… kyunki jo main mann me kahta wo toh use pata
chalne hee wala tha toh phhir main peechhe palatkar chilla kar kyun kahu
.
“hiiii…”Esha ke bagal me baith kar maine kaha
“oh hii.. Arman…”
“what time it is…”
“five past seven”
“yaha subah hai, par reality me toh raat ho chuki hai…”
“yaha raat nahi hoti, koyi ghar nahi jaata… mere khayal se maine last time bataya
tha…”
“maine ye toh nahi socha tha…”
“par yaha aisa hee hai… tumhe andaza bhi nahi ki main kab se yaha tumhara wait
kar rahi hoon… tum hamesha se yahi chahte the na… hai na… apni puri zindagi
tum yahi chahte the ki main tumhara intezaar karu, jis tarah tum mera parking
me college se bahar aane ka karte the… par jab asaliyat me nahi hua toh tumhne
wahi concept yaha apply kar diya…. aur jo tumhare dimag me hai yani ki jo tum
aaj karne ki firaq me ho… wo mujhe pata hai aur uska anjaam bhi…”
“yeah… I know…. you know,what I know…”
“stop it Arman. It’s enough now… you don’t need to do more… you don’t need more
enemies and Daddu isn’t like your any college opponent… he is ruthless. he’ll hunt
you down and kill you when he’ll know… who you really are… you’ve seen him and
his revenge… but still you’re trying to… okay, leave Nagpur and make new
friends… some really good friends not like Arun… ”
“ Arun…? He’s my best friend including some others like Saurabh, Sulabh….”
“I hate them all… they didn’t stop you when they could rather than they enjoyed it..
they used you and when you needed them… they turned their back on you…
331
actually I think, they are also the reason of your bind condition… I hate your all
best friends including Rajshri Pandey…”
“I hate your best friends too… especially Divya.”
“really… I didn’t know that… why”
“yeah...I think… our best friends are like our own shit… only we know how to live
with them”
“I think… our best friends are like our own shit… only we know how to live with
them and about your concern regarding Daddu then sorry to tell you, but Daddu is
necessary for my living… he’ll pay what he did…”muskurate hue maine Esha ki
taraf dekha… par wo ab bhi thodi chintit thi…. shayad Esha mere dimag ke us bhag
ki rachna thi… jo hamesha mujhe aur mere kands ko rokne ki koshish karte the….
par hamesha nakam rahte the…
“ aur Nisha… mujhe nahi lagta jitna wo tumhe pyar karti thi kisi aur ne kiya hoga
aur shayad hee koyi aur kare”
“Nisha…. Wo tumhari tarah nahi hai. wo mujhe bore karti thi… chhoti-chhoti baat
ko lekar ladti thi ki maine uski friends ko good morning, good night wish kyu nahi
karta… main uske messege ka reply usi samay kyun nahi deta… wo kisi bhi shop
me jati, kahi bhi jati toh dresses ki pic kheech-kheech kar mujhe bhejti aur bolti ki
batao, Arman inme se kaun sa le loon…. Kya ghantaaaa.. sorry, Mera matlab, kya
zaroorat hai aisa karne ki, kaun sa main mahan dress designer hoon ya phhir
mujhe iske baare me kuch pata hai… Mere khud ke kapde Arun, Saurabh kharidte
the kyunki mujhe kharidna nahi aata tha… phhir main uska birthday bhool gaya…
main jaanta tha ki yadi main uska birthday bhool gaya toh wo mujhpar jhapatta
maregi, isliye maine ek mahine pahle se reminder laga ke rakha tha… lekin pata
hai kya hua… reminder ek din aage ka tha… is baat pe ek hafte tak wo naraz rahi…
apne ghar se bahar tak nahi gayi… jis-se uski saheliya… whatsapp, facebook yaha
tak ki call kar-kar ke mujhe blame karne lagi ki ye sab meri vazah se ye hua hai…
uski saheliyo ne itna pareshan karke rakha tha ki sabko block marna pada… jiski
baad iski khabar unhone phhir se Nisha ko de di aur phhir se hafto bhar wo bahar
nahi nikli…”
“kafi kuch mujhse milta julta hai… aur Arman… shadi ke pahle yadi koyi ladki
tumse lade, baar-baar naraz ho jaye toh iska matlab ye nahi ki wo tumse nafrat
karti hai, balki pyar karti hai… shadi ke baad ka pata nahi…”
“I agree.. lekin har chiz ki koyi limit hoti hai… har samay ye faltu ka pyar ya
ladayi jo bhi tum kahti ho thik nahi rahta…. ab ek baar wo mere sath ghadi
kharidne gayi… usne aage ek pahan kar dekhi phhir mujhse puchhi ki kaisi hai…
maine kaha badhiya… lekin usne kaha ki main jhooth bol raha hoon. Phhir usne
dusari ghadi pahni aur phhir mujhse same sawal.. jiske baad mera bhi same jawab
lekin usne phhir kaha ki main jhooth bol raha hoon… is tarah usne teesari ghadi
nikalwayi. Tum yakin karogi ki aisa pure ek ghante tak chala… tumhe lagega ki
isme kaun si badi baat hai, ek ghante toh normal si baat hai… lekin kabhi karke
dekhna. Ek ghante ke baad use ek watch pasand aayi lekin uske agle hee din usne
mujhe call karke kaha ki wo.. wo wali return karke dusara kharidegi… mera toh
bheja hee khisak gaya sunkar, diya jordar batti… jispar wo boli ki, toh chalo na
332
kaun sa job karte ho…din bhar room me pade hee toh rahte ho… matlab aisa wo
kaise bol sakti hai, meri bezzati karne ka haq sirf Arun ko hai…”
“and you still didn’t understand why I’m not with you, why Nisha is not with
you…”
“ A time comes in your life when you realize that losing people isn’t actually….. a
loss and I realized it in 8th Semester…. Thanks to you, Gautam and my
family”bolkar main muskuraya…. Par main ye bhi jaanta tha ki Esha itni jaldi
haar nahi manegi… kyunki Esha ke roop me indirectly ya phhir directly main khud
se hee baat kar raha tha… yani ki main khud se lad raha tha aur yahi hota hai,jab
do mere jaise log aapas me bhidte hai toh….. audience tay nahi kar pati ki kaun
sahi hai aur kaun galat.. kaun jeetega aur kaun harega….
“We all have to pay the price for our sins and if you didn’t then you will… ”
“don’t worry…. One solid step and everything will be changed.”
“it is very hard to convince you….. I can’t…”
“no one can….”
“you always do the things which people tell you not to do... hai na”
“yes…. and trust me...I love it. I just hate everyone excluding you… I cant hate you,
I mean I tried but fortunately, I failed… ”
“that’s the Arman I know… who hates everyone, who hates truth… who hates….”
“no…..”maine beech me kaha “I don’t hate truths. No…. I don’t hate truths…. i hate
the society…and there are many differences between these two…. Two…. Two
hateful objects”
“OKAY, I surrendered…. Time to go….”background me chalte gaane ko sunkar

Esha boli…. “you won, I lost”
“my alarm…. Shit.…”waha khade hokar maine kaha aur apna goggle shirt se saaf
karne laga…. maine thoda Esha ko chidhaya bhi ki kaise wo mujhse is word-war
me haar gayi par wo muskurati rahi…. Alarm ki aawaz dheere-dheere tez hone lagi
aur waha mauzood har chiz apni jagah par hilne lagi….
“ you’re smiling…”
“ does my smile scare you… ?”
“ no… the other thing scares me most actually that’s the scariest thing ”
“and what is that scariest thing….”
“I’ve seen the future and the scariest thing is…. one day you wont be able to
smile…..”

333
“then that day will be my last day…………… bitch.”goggle lagane ke baad maine
kaha aur idhar meri aankh khul gayi… maine mobile ka alarm band kiya aur…. jis
chair par soya hua tha, us-se uthkar main bathroom me pahucha aur bathroom ka
nal kholkar nal ke neeche thande pani me apna sar dhone laga… raat ke 11 baj
chuke the. bathroom se bahar aakar maine apne bedroom se ass hataya… I mean
ash.. wood ash. Aur phhir do-teen pet dard ki goli khayi taaki aain mauke par mere
pet me marod na ho….
.
Main NH-6 me jaha bhi, jo bhi kand karta… har jagah mushkilat the aur ye
mushqil police paida kar rahi thi… isliye maine police van ko hee lootne ka socha...
mujhe pata hai ki main chodu hoon kyunki ek toh main police van ko lootne ja raha
tha jo ki pahle se hee taiyar the upar se yadi main kamyab bhi hua toh hazar-do
hazar ke aalawa mujhe kuch nahi milne wala tha… par meri ye loot paiso ke liye
nahi thi. meri ye loot self satisfaction ki thi… taaki zindagi bhar main jab bhi NH-6
ke baare me sochu… toh main ise apne victory spot ke roop me yaad rakhu na ki us
roop me jaha maine apni puri ek rat sardi ke dino me nadi ke beech me bitayi thi…
maine katte me kartoos bhara aur chehre par roomal baandh kar phhir se us
shortcut wali gali me nikla jis par last time gaya tha… kyunki front se jaane par
police wale toh mujhe dekhte hee pel dete aur yadi na bhi pelte toh pakad toh lete
hee… isliye maine wo andhere me jhadi-jhunjhati me ghuskar us kachche raaste
me aage badhta raha….
Kathinayi toh mujhe aaj bhi hui, par main aage badhta gaya aur apne mathe me
kayi jagah jhadiyo ke kharoch ke nishan lekar finally main highway me
pahucha….
NH-6 highway par ekdum beech-o-beech khada hokar maine jor se police walo ko
gali di… bahut bhayankar gali… matlab itni bhayankar ki main khud darr gaya ki
yadi kisi policewale ne sun liya toh wo toh meri gand hee phad dalega…. Par meri
gali mere aalawa kisi ne nahi suni….
.
Mera plan simple tha… kisi bhi police jeep ko pakadna, unhe batti dena, ek do ko
goli marna phhir do-char dialogue dekar waha se kalti ho jana… isliye NH-6 me
mera sabse pahla kaam aaj police jeep ko dhoondhana tha…. wo bhi aisi police jeep
ko jo ki patrolling marte waqt kahi khadi ho… isiliye NH-6 me main us shortcut
raaste ko pakadkar itna peechhe aaya tha aur Mujhe ye bhi pata tha ki police jeep
mujhse kitni door me, kis direction me khadi hogi… maine usi direction me apna
rookh kiya aur daudne laga…. daudte hue maine katte me silencer fit kiya…
silencer: kya maine iski story batayi ki silencer mujhe kaha se mila ?
.
Main aaj Sharda Enterprises se dopahar me hee room aa gaya tha, par room aane
se pahle main ek workshop pe gaya tha… sabse pahle main jis workshop me gaya,
waha kafi bheed thi aur us workshop ka owner thoda Buddha tha, isliye maine
andaza lagaya ki sala ye mera kaam nahi kar payega, isliye main dusare
workshop me pahucha… par wo band tha. teesare workshop wale ne mera kaam
karne se mana kar diya aur bola ki main police station se written me likha ke laun
aur sath me apne aadhar card ki photocopy uske paas jama karu… gandu, lawda…
itni mehnat aur risk uthana hota toh main khud nahi bana leta… phhir main
chauthe workshop pe gaya jaha wo 1500 me mera kaam karne ko maan gaya…
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Usne mujhe 1 inch, 2 inch diameter ki PVC pipe lane ke liye bola aur do-char
different size ki drill bit ke sath glue bhi magwaya… jab maine ye sab saaman use
lakar diya toh usne mujhe andar karke workshop ka gate lock kiya aur fatafat
kaam me lag gaya… pahle toh usne mere katte ke barrel ka size mapa, phhir jo
maine do pvc pipes lakar di thi.. use tape se mapne laga… measuring-veasuring
karke usne chhote size wale pipe me equally spaced drill hole kiya aur ek wood ring
ki help se use bade wale pvc pipe me fit karke use glue se chipka diya…
“ye niklega toh nahi…”pvc pipe ko kheechkar maine kaha “lawda… ye toh alag ho
gaya…”
“sukhne toh de bhai… ab kya mutth marne ke baad lund ekdum se thodi chhota ho
jata hai, thoda Time toh lagta hai na.. waise hee, bas thode samay ke baad ye jud
jayenge…”wapas se wood ring ke sath dono pvc pipe ko set karke workshop wale
ne kaha….
“nice…… example…”
Iske baad jab glue ke karan dono pvc pipes jud gayi toh usne use pakad kar na
jaane kya-kya karta raha…. Kabhi ek saw me pelta toh kabhi dusare saw me…
kabhi vertically toh kabhi horizontally aur phhir finally mujhse mera katta maga…
aur katte ke purje-purje alag karke katte ke barrel me khanche yani threads
banaye aur phhir silencer ko katte ke barrel me ghuma-ghumakar fit karke mujhe
dete hue bola….
“1500…”
“kamal ka aadmi hai yar tu toh…” 1500 ke badle 2000 dekar maine uske hath se
apna hathiyar liya aur silencer khol kar wapas fit karte hue bola “keep the
change…”
“waise bhi change nahi hai… name kya hai tumhara…”
“The Originator…”kahte hue maine zameen me uske pair ke paas goli chalayi, jis-se
wo kood kar door chhitak gaya…
“pagal hai kya lawda…”
“haan…”
.
Toh NH-6 me daudte hue maine katte me silencer fit kiya aur jab daudte hue mujhe
door police van dikhayi di toh main wahi ruka aur ek ped ki oot me chhipkar
situation ko analyse karne laga…
“andhere me dikhayi dene wala binocular bhi kharid lena chahiya tha… kuch dikh
hee nahi raha, yaha se toh…”kahkar main ped ke peechhe chhipte-chhipte aage
badhne laga… aur jaise hee main unke kafi karib aaya main phhir se wahi rooka
aur situation ka jayja lene laga…

335
Police van me shayad do policewale the, jinme se ek wireless par thodi-thodi der
me baat kar raha tha aur ek khali steering sambhale hua tha… kul do log the aur
dono hee aage baithe hue the… maine silencer ko ghuma-ghuma kar khola aur ek
baar phhir se use achchhi tarah se gun me fit kiya aur neechhe jhuk-kar aage
badha… main police van ke peechhe gaya aur wahi baithkar upar-neeche ho rahi
meri saans ko thoda control kiya… mere gale me kharash hone lagi, jise maine
apna muh dabakar shant kiya aur phhir police van ki tek lekar wahi sadak par
baitha raha…
“three….one….. two….”
Teen tak gin-ne ke baad main utha aur neeche jhuk-kar samne wali khidki ke paas
pahuchkar wireless par baat karte hue policewale ke kanpattti par seedhe katta
sata diya aur ek gahri lambi saans li…
“give me your all money otherwise I’ll give you death… whooo”
jiske sar par maine katta rakha tha, wo toh achet hee ho gaya matlab wo ekdum
murti ke mafiq apni seat par mano jam gaya tha par jisne steering sambhal rakhi
thi usne turant apne senior ka revolver nikala aur mujhpar taan diya…
“all clear bolke wireless rakh… aur tu be, driver… jo bolta hoo kar, warna dono ki
main yahi maiyya chod dunga… rakh wireless madarchod, ek bar me sunayi nahi
deta kya aur us bhosdiwale ko bol ki apni maa mat chudaye, revolver dikha ke…
warna main toh bulletproof jacket pahna hoon,bach jaunga… lekin tu nipat
jayega… ab chal bol, usko ki wo revolver peechhe wali seat par fek de…”
Jis policewale ke kanpattti par maine gun taani thi usne hath ke ishare se apne
sathi policewale ko revolver neeche rakhne ke liye kaha aur sath hee wireless me
all clear bolkar usne wireless bhi peechhe fek diya… maine unhi me se ek se
peechhe wala gate khulwaya aur andar baithkar dono ke sar par gun taankar
hasne laga….
“driver gadi badha… kitni der se dekh raha hoon, kab se yahi khade ho… bore nahi
hote kya tumlog…”
“teri toh main bajaunga… achchhe se..”
“madarchod, gadi aage badha… dhamki baad me de dena…”
“police se rada kar raha hai tu, bach kar jayega kaha…”gadi start karte hue us
driver ne kaha…
“Teri bahan ke paas jaunga….”
Jispar wo gadi chalate hue hee gusse se peechhe mudne laga par maine tabhi use
ahsaas dilaya ki uski khopdi ka bhavisya mere hath me hai….
“abhi gadi ki speed kam kar aur aage se left mar… us chor basti me rahta hoon
main. Par mujhe pata hai ki tum log yakin nahi karoge, tum log sochoge ki bhala
336
ek chor apne thikana kyun batayega… aur tum log aisa sochoge yahi sochkar
maine wo kaha… jis par tumhe yakin nahi karna chahiye par phhir bhi tum uspar
yakin karoge aur finally result ye hoga ki tum log khud confuse ho jaoge ki maine
exactly kaha kya tha…dekho be… mujhe jyada ghuma-firakar baat-chit karne ka
shauk nahi hai isliye bol raha hoon… wallet nikal kar mujhe do”
Unke sar ke peechhe guns ko tight karke maine kaha… jiske baad dono ne apna
wallet mujhe diya…
“sale garibo… tumse jyada paisa toh mere paas college time me rahta tha… aur ek
baat batao mujhe tumlog… tumlog bhosdiwalo, itna udi me kyun rahte ho be..
mera matlab jhat barabar hawaldar jinme se adhiktar ko lawda gravity kya hota
hai ye tak nahi maloom wo behanchod aise uchakta hai jaise madarchod kitna
bada gyani hoon… chal be tu bata… wormhole kya hai ?”
“kyaaa….”jis-se maine puchha tha, uske baju wale ne kaha… yani driver ne.
“tujhse puchha kya maine…”apne katte se uske hath me kartoos ghused kar maine
kaha… “beta lightly mat le mujhe, maa chod dunga tum sabki… chal idhar se right
maar… abey bhosdiwale right me tera sasural hai kya jo udhar mod raha hai… left
le. Jo main bolu uska just opposite karna…”
Par left turn lene ki bajay usne break mara aur apna hath pakad kar dard se
dabane laga… aur phhir khunnas me mujhpar peechhe jhapatta marne ki koshish
ki, par kartoos ghusa uska hath ke dard ne use peechhe thik se mudne tak nahi
diya…
“tu saaale, rook behan ke laude…. Bhajiya tal dunga tera main… madar…”
“teri dayi ka bhosda… Originator ko gali deta hai… madarchod, teri maiiya ko
chod dalu, tere baap ke gand me tera lund… chutiya, burchoti ke… I mean burchodi
ke…, burmari ke… gand-mare madarchod, burchatte, randi ki paidaish…. Kutte…”
“kutta bolta hai mere ko.. isssss … sher hoon main sher, ek baar tu pakad me aa,
yahi tera gala ghot kar teri maa nahi chod diya toh bolna…”
“tu sher hai…? lol… teri maa jungle sher se chudwani gayi thi ya sher tere ghar teri
maa ko chodne aaya tha… sala teri maa toh phhir mera bhi lawda bhi le legi… kahi
ganga-jamuna ki randi toh nahi hai teri maa… phhir toh shayad choda bhi hoga
maine teri maa ko… gand bhi mari hogi teri maa ki… teri maa ke muh me mutth bhi
giraya hoga… meri chhod, teri maa ko toh tere hee police department ke log chodte
honge, infact… tu khud logo ko apni maa ki chudai me invite karta hoga… thik usi
tarah jaise log apne dosto ko khane pe invite karte hai.. tere senior ne bhi teri maa
ko choda hoga.. main toh bas soch-soch kar khush ho raha hoon ki teri maa ki gand
ke chhed ka diameter toh do-dhayi centimeter ka ho gaya hoga itne logo se
chudwane ke baad… kahi tu bhi toh apni maa ko nahi chodta, sale in**st…
bhosdike… ab bol… hahahahaha…”
Us police driver ne apna sar peet liya, wo kabhi rota toh kabhi meri gali sunkar
steering wheel me hee apna sar de marta… is dauran uska senior use shant rahne
ke liye bolta raha… par wo toh mano pagal hee ho gaya tha aur gusse se aise ubal
raha tha ki yadi main galti se bhi uske hath aa gaya toh wo mera jeete-jee
karamkand kar dega… khair… choro ki basti me maine ek jagah police van
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rukwaya aur apna katta aur unme se ek ka revolver… jo mujhe mast naye jamane
ka lag raha tha use lekar neeche utara aur tyre par goli markar waha se bhaga-
bhag macha diya…
.
Choro ki basti se escape plan maine bahut pahle hee banaya hua tha… kisi ko yaad
hai ya nahi par jab maine NH-6 me loot ke dauran car me soti hui item ko jhapad
mara tha, uske pahle jab uska husband mootne ke liye car se utara tha… uske
pahle main NH-6 me ghoomte hue bore ho raha tha. Remember ? tabhi maine
sadak ke kinare ret par ek patli lakdi lekar zameen me plan banaya tha ki yadi
police bychance mujhe kabhi gher bhi leti hai toh main yaha jungle ke through
chor-basti me jaunga… phhir basti cross karke sadak ke dusari oor, samne dusari
basti me pahchunga aur river view colony ki direction me aage badhte hue us
dusari basti ko cross karke jo nadi bahti hai use paar karke river view colony me
aish farmaunga… par kyunki mera nadi me koodne ka koyi vichar nahi tha isliye
maine apne plan ko reverse mode me activate kiya tha… yani ki nadi par karke ,
pahle choro ki basti me aana… phhir wo chhota jo jungle tha, uske through NH-6
ko cross karke colony me pahuchna….
Ab kyunki main already choro ki basti me bhag raha tha isliye maine jungle me
entry mari… aur andhadhund bhagta raha… bhagte-bhagte main kayi baar ped se
takrata toh kayi baar mera pair kisi jagah faskar mujhe gira deta, lekin main har
baar uth khada hota aur phhhir se bhagne lagta… maine apni speed kam karke
rakhi hui thi, taaki yadi main kisi chiz se takrau bhi toh mujhpar impact kam
pade… lekin tabhi mere bagal me aisi aawaz hui jaisi kisi ne goli mari ho… aur is
aawaz se hee meri gand fat gayi aur main full speed ke sath bhagne laga… par goli
ab bhi chal hee rahi thi.. aur samay ke sath mujhpar jo log goli chala rahe the, unki
sankhya bhi badhne lagi thi..
.
Maine peechhe mudkar dekha toh paya ki kayi aadmi vishal torch liye mere
peechhe daud rahe hai.. shuru me mere peechhe 4-5 torch lapak rahe the par phhir
thodi hee der me ye sankhya teen gune se bhi jyada ho gayi aur sab mujhpar firing
kiye ja rahe the… par meri kismet achchhi thi ki yaha itna andhera tha ki wo thulle
mujhe dekh nahi pa rahe the upar se unki aur meri distance bhi kafi thi…. par
phhir bhi wo mere peechhe pade the… par ajeeb baat ye thi ki salo ko ye kaise
maloom chal raha tha ki main kis direction me mud raha hoon…. Main jis taraf bhi
mudta, jaha bhi ghusta… police wale usi ke according apna direction change kar
rahe the… Maine NH-6 me raat-o-raat ghoom-ghoom kar ek se ek rasto ko khoj
nikala tha… taaki waqt aane par main police walo ko chakma de saku aur unhi
raasto me main is samay bhag raha tha par police kaise unhi raasto me mere
peechhe aa rahi thi… upar se wo na toh kahi rook rahi thi aur na hee kahi bhatak
rahi thi… bole toh exact main jidhar jata, udhar wo pahuch jati…
.
“Yaha mujhe nahi dhoondh payenge ye…” hafte hue ek kaatedar jhadi ke andar
side se ghuste hue main badbadaya… “gand mar li be behanchodo ne… pata hota ki
sale itna daudayenge toh do hafte pahle se stamina bana kar rakhta… lagta hai
chhati fat jayegi…. Kahi heart fail na ho jaye madarchod….”

338
Jhadi ke andar ghuskar main thodi der sustaya ki tabhi mere peechhe bhag rahe
policewale daudte-daudte rook gaye aur dheere-dheere meri taraf chalkar aane
lage…
“inki maa ka… inhe pata toh nahi chal gaya ki main yaha chhipa hoon ? rook kyun
gaye ye… sala bhag leta hoon, warna pakad me aaya toh encounter kar denge yahi
pe… upar se sala itni bhayankar gali bhi de rakhi hai…ki… wo toh akele sau goli
marega mujhe… bhaag lawda…”ahiste-ahiste jhadi se nikalkar dabe paanv
khisakte hue maine socha… par shayad mere pair ki aahat unko sunayi de gayi aur
unme se ek ne jisne pata nahi hath me kya pakad rakha tha… meri taraf ishara
karke kaha….
“wo bhag raha hai…”usne kaha
“goli maro kutte ko…”ye uske kisi sathi ne kaha hoga…
“jaan se mat marna koyi, usne meri maa ko gali di hai, use main sabak
sikhaunga….”ye shayad us police cum driver ne kaha hoga….. bhagte hue maine
andaza lagaya aur tabhi mere upar roshani padi….
.
Wo mere itne paas aa chuke the ki unki torch ki roshani mere sharir me pad rahi
thi… maine waha se bhagne me pura jor laga diya aur physics bhagwan se dua
karne laga ki wo apne physics putra ki help kare aur is incident ko apni kisi theory
me uljha de… ya phhir mujhe yaha se kaise bhi karke nikal de.. Arun ki kasam
khakar kahta hoon ki aaj ke baad ek footi kaudi nahi churaunga…
.
“bhagne mat dena haramjade ko… danda fek ke maro harami ko….”
Policewale walo ne ab firing band kar di thi, yani wo mujhe zinda pakadne ke firaq
me the… isiliye main bhi goli nahi mar raha tha kyunki yadi main ek-do fire karta
toh phhir policewale bhi firing par utar aate. filhal mujhe rokne ke liye wo gas ke
gole, danda, patthar fek ke mujhe mar rahe the… aadhe se adhik policewale toh
bhagne ke dauran kafi peechhe chhoot gaye the par do-teen aise the jo barabar
jungle me mere peechhe bhag rahe the… jo shayad new-new join hue honge…. jab
bhagte hue mujhe highway ke uspar river colony ke paas aane ka aabhas hua toh
maine jungle ke paar highway ko crosss karke RVC jaane ka socha… par yadi main
is tarah jata toh policewale bhi mere peechhe pad jate aur mera peechha karte-
karte wo bhi Colony pahuch jate, jaha se unhe mujhe dhoondhna jyada aasan
rahta… isliye maine apna jacket nikala aur andar us jacket me bandhe do bomb
nikale…. sahi suna….. bomb. Real bomb.
.
Kya maine apne bomb banane ki story batayi ? nahi… ?
toh hua actually ye tha ki workshop se main silencer banwa kar jab apne room
yani ki E-6 ki taraf aa raha tha toh raaste me mera pair ek battery se takraya jise
laat marte hue main apne room tak laya aur phhhir ghuma kar ek laat us battery
ko aisa mara ki seedhe boundary paar VR ke ghar ki deewar se battery takraya….
Aur tabhi mujhe kuch soojha… maine VR ke flat se wo battery liya aur Vivek ke
medical me pahucha…. Maine us-se hydrogen peroxide ki maang ki,jispar usne
kaha ki…

339
“main ye nahi bechta…bro.. lekin main us bro ko jaanta hoon jo aapko ye de sakta
hai…”
“sach…”
“haan bro…”
“chal phhir shutter gira… dukan ka…”
Maine Vivek ko mere bro hone ka vaasta diya aur use lekar usi ki bike me us
chemist shop me pahucha jaha se mujhe Vivek ne hydrogen peroxide ki 2 litre ki
botal dilwa di… maine us botal par label dekha…
“3 %, dil. Hydrogen peroxide… is-se mera kaam nahi hoga , mujhe concentrated
hydrogen peroxide chahiye… jisme 60-70 % hydrogen peroxide ho…”
“abey rocket udayega kya..”haste hue us chemist ne kaha “ le ja, isi ko… cons.
Hydrogen peroxide aise hee nahi milta yadi Nagpur ka collector bhi personally
mage toh use bhi nahi milega aur mere paas hai bhi nahi… ”
.
2 Litre Dilute hydrogen peroxide , ek thermometer lekar main apne room pahucha
aur jo hydrogen peroxide main lekar aaya tha use gas par garam karne ke liye
chadha diya… main beech-beech me thermometer ubalte hue hydrogen peroxide
me dalkar temperature check kar raha tha ki kahi temp. 100 degree celsius se adhik
na ho jaye kyunki water jo ki hydrogen peroxide me mix tha wo toh 100 degree
celsius me steam ban kar udd ja raha tha lekin hydrogen peroxide ko steam banane
ke liye 150 degree temp. chahiye tha… isiliye meri yahi koshish thi ki temp. 100-105
degree ko anyhow cross na kare… taki liquid se sirf water portion out ho aur dilute
hydrogen peroxide, concentrated hydrogen peroxide me convert ho jaye… 5-6
ghante lag gaye mujhe is kaam me… is dauran, wo battery jo mujhe sadak se mili
thi, maine use khola aur pura black material jo ki magnesium oxide tha use conc.
hydrogen peroxide me milakar half litre ke do bottle me bhar kar shock detonator
fit karke apne jacket me achchhi tarah se baandh kar…. Chair me so gaya, jaha
phhir meri Arun, Esha se mulaqat hui aur aankh khulne ke baad , police wale ko
pelkar jungle me bhagte hue, jab mujhe aabhas hua ki colony bas mujhse thodi hee
door me hai toh maine daudte hue apna jacket utara aur dono bottles ko nikal kar
bhagte hue rook gaya…
.
“bhag behanchod… bomb hai”meri taraf bhag rahe police wale ko sachet karne ke
uddeshya se maine kaha aur cap nikal kar puri taqat se wo bottle zameen me
feka….
“madarchod phoot na….”jab kuch seconds ho gaye aur visfot nahi hua toh maine
darr ke mare khud se kaha…
Policewala jo mere bomb bolne par ruka hua tha, jab kuch seconds aur bomb nahi
foota toh wo dheere-dheere phhir meri taraf badha…

340
“aaa.. aaa…. Lavde aaa… ek aur botal hai… seedhe tere khopdi me fodunga… aaaa
gand me dum hai toh aa… madarchod, teri dayi ka bhosda…”
Par jab meri taraf badhte hue policewale ne apne kadam peechhe nahi kiye toh
maine dusari botal bhi fekne ka socha aur jaise hee botal ko fekne ke liye hath
uthaya waha gand fad visfot hua… itna bada ki behanchod main waha se kayi
meter door ja gira… main seedhe jakar ped se takraya aur kuch der tak apni
aankhe band kiye hue baitha raha…
“15 seconds… got it…”ped ko pakadkar khada hote hue maine kaha aur dusari
botal ka bhi cap nikalkar jor se feka… aur goggle lagakar Highway ki taraf
badha… aur kuch der baad yani ki 10-12 seconds baad background me phhir se ek
bhayankar visfot hua aur main bade aaram se highway paar karke langdate hue,
kate-fate kapdo ke sath… chori, chupke colony ki boundary koodkar apne room me
pahucha… room pahuchkar maine darwaja andar se lock kiya aur chhat ki taraf ek
hath uthakar uparwale se bola….
“chodte hai….. lawda”

.
Maine police ke revolver jise maine loota tha use apne katte ke sath saaf karke
neeche farsh pe rakha aur jakar sofe par mari halat me ja gira… kyunki bed ko toh
maine aag lagakar tap liya tha. main chahta tha ki ab mujhe bas Arun ya Esha
dikh jaye taki mere andar ki bechaini, police ka khauff thoda kam ho… maine
music play karke earphone kaan me lagaya aur room ki light ke sath-sath apni
aankhe band ki… par usi samay mera darwaja kisi ne bahut jor se peeta… itni jor
se ki main kursi se kap-kapate hue utha…
“kahi, Aradhna toh mujhe nahi dara rahi…”chair se ekdum uthkar maine anuman
lagaya… aur main abhi thik dhang se anuman laga bhi nahi paya tha ki mere
darwaje me ek baar phhir se jordar aawaz hui…
Aur abki baar aawaz bahut jyada tez thi… jaise koyi darwaje ko goliyo se bhoon
raha ho… tabhi mere dimag me strike kiya ki… ki… kahi police toh nahi aa gayi…
2.0 ?
“BC Police… bhag lawda…”
Aur jaise hee 2.0 ne kaha… main turant mobile, earphone wahi patak kar peechhe
wala exit door khola…
“sala ye toh bathroom hai…”
Phhir maine dusara darwaja khola…
“ye toh bedroom hai, yahi se toh nikla tha be…”
“ek minute, sochne de… bahar wale exit se peechhe wala exit thik 180 degree par
hai… toh jis darwaje se goliyo ke chalne ki aawaz aa rahi hai, us-se thik 180 degree
me dusari taraf peechhe wala exit hoga… yess.. got it…”

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Jis gate ke bahar se goliyo ki aawaz aa rahi thi jisme bahut sare chhed ho chuke
the, us-se thik seedhe wale gate ki kundi pakad kar mujhe khayal aaya ki Jack
Sparrow ka wo “aaj ka din tumhe hamesha yaad rahega….” Wala dialogue police
ko maar du… lekin maine jaise hee gate ki kundi pakad kar gate khola… mere sar
me saamne se kisi ne bahut tez se mara… shayad dande se… kaan ke thoda upar
khopdi me… aur usne itni jor se mara tha ki aankh apne aap band ho gayi… kaan
ke sath-sath pura dimag sunn pad gaya…. usne mujhe dande se itni tej se mara tha
ki dusari taraf bhi tej dard ho raha tha ya phhir kahu toh pura sar hee dard de
raha tha… pata nahi kis chiz se mara tha sale the… pura sar ghoom gaya… aur
main sirf ek war me hee peechhe hokar zameen me baith gaya.
.
Main wahi darwaje ke paas bahut der tak aankhe band karke baitha raha, is
dauran police walo ne main gate ukhada aur sab ke sab waha bahar jitney
mauzood the, wo sab aa gaye…
“khade kar isko… pure room dekho, kaha-kaha kya-kya chhipa rakha hai isne….
Sala, aatankwadi”
Itne me ek ne mujhe uthaya aur meri gardan dabate hue peechhe deewar par jor se
patka, jis-se ek baar phhir mera sar me dard hua, meri aankhe ab bhi band thi…
par is harqat ke karan maine apni aankhe kholi toh dekha ki saamne wahi police
wala tha… jiski maa ko maine NH-6 me randi, chakla, chhinar kaha tha…
“mujhe mara ja sakta hai, lekin haraya nahi ja sakta….”maine 2.0 se kaha…
“kya matlab be tera…”
“dekh…”
Maine us police driver ko jiske hath me maine goli mari thi uski taraf dekhkar
kaha….
“tu wahi hai na… jiski maa sabse chudwati hai…lo.. lo..lol”
Chapter-32: ill will
usne aav na dekha taav aur mera sar pakad kar lagatar deewar pe marne laga aur
phhir gardan pakad kar neeche patak diya jiske baad uska sath dene uske kayi
sathi aaye aur mujhe laato se, dande se bhada-bhad marne lage…
.
Sabse jyada dum lagakar mujhe wo mar raha tha, jiski maa ko maine randi kaha
tha… us samay police se maar khate waqt meri jehan me 8TH SEMESTER ! ka wo
scene yaad aaya jab police walo ne mujhe aur mere dosto ko jail me bharkar koota
tha…
Koyi mere jabde me laat marta toh koyi rifle ko ulta karke dana-dan mujhe pele
pada tha… mera sar shayad phat chuka tha, isiliye pure farsh me khoon phail raha
tha… mera sar hee nahi balki mere sharir ke kayi hisse, kayi hisso se phat chuke
the aur iske bawzood police wale the ki pele pade the… meri aankhe ab band honi

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lagi thi, mere sar se bahta khoon meri aankho me bhar raha tha jiske karan mujhe
apni aankhe band karne padi aur…………… phhir
.
main ek baar phhir se yaha tha. apne college me, apne hostel me, apne room me…
main langdate hue apne bistar se utha aur khidki ke bahar dekha… hostel ke bahar
aaj bhi wo jung lagi bench rakhi hui thi, jispar Esha mera intezaar kar rahi thi….
Arun mere peechhe khada tha aur sath me Saurabh bhi…
“so, this is the end of The Great Arman… ?”Arun ne hamesha ki tarah majakiya
andaaz me puchha.. Arun ki jo tasveer, jo yaad mere dimag me thi… wo uski
chuTiyepanti ki thi… isiliye maine use aise hee save karke rakha hua tha. jaha
situation koyi bhi ho wo mujhse hamesha majak hee karega…
“maybe, I don’t know… cigarette hai…?”
“maine kaha tha, sharif ban ja…”mere muh me cigarette fasate hue Arun ne kaha…
jispar maine uski baat ka koyi jawab nahi diya aur Saurabh ki taraf dekhkar
kaha….
“tu toh aa gaya… kya hal hai Delhi ka. Rajshri Pandey kaha hai”
“Rajshri Pandey humara junior tha… jo jis sequence me tujhse haqiqat me mila
tha, usi sequence me yaha bhi tujhse milega… par lagta hai ki uske aane se pahle
hee… tu”
“toh kya main yaha se bhi mar jaunga ?”chauk kar maine puchha…
“hume kya pata lawda…”mere muh se cigarette chheen kar Arun bola… “ye dekh,
aise dhua nikal lega.. aise, circular shape me…”
“circular… ? abey main rectangular shape me bhi nikal sakta hoon…”
“yeah… man”apne chaddi ke andar hath dalte hue Arun bola “chal bathroom ko
sperm donate karke aate hai aakhiri bar…”
“kya Esha hamesha us jung lagi bench me baithi rahti hai… ?”khidki se bahar Esha
ko dekhkar maine puchha..
“hamesha nahi, par jab-jab tu yaha aata hai… wo yaha apne aap prakat ho jati hai
achanak se… matlab hume pata hee nahi chalta ki wo kab , kidhar se aayi…warna
main wo raasta hee band na karwa du…”
“itna hee nafrat karta hai toh jaan se maar kyun nahi deta use…”
“maine koshish ki thi……. Par koyi nateeza nahi hua. Phhir maine check karne ke
liye Varun ko jo 6-7 saal se engineering kar raha hai use marne ki koshish ki… tab
mujhe pata chala ki yaha koyi bhi nahi mar sakta…”
“creativity…”
“ ja uske paas, mil le us-se…”

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“rahne de… aaj mood nahi hai…”aakhiri kash kheechkar maine kaha “ek aur de…”
“khatam… dukan se lana padega…”
“wo almari ke upar kya hai…”
“wo kharab hai be, bahut din se waha rakhi hai. pani me gir gayi thi toh sukhane
ke liye rakh diya tha… rahne de… kharab ho gayi hogi…”
“pagal hai kya…”almari ke upar se wo cigarette nikal kar maine kaha
“ajeeb taste aayega uska.. rahne de… kharab hai”
“ kharab chize kabhi kharab nahi hoti”
“tu toh ek baar me hee ludhak gaya be Arman.. maine toh socha tha ki police walo
ka jamkar muqabala karega aur jung jeet ke aayega…”mere kandhe me hath
rakhkar mere sath khidki ke bahar Esha ko dekhte hue Saurabh ne kaha…
“I’m neither the winner nor the loser… I’m Yugpurush, Shri AR-Man, MTL, 4D
Man… nope… 5D and The Originator…. And Shagman also.”
“really..? phhir kyun haqiqat me teri body ekdum se shant pad gayi… phhir kyun
tujhe itna dard hua….”
“To become the strongest man you need to face the strongest pain…because The
more pain we feel…stronger we become.”
“so you’re still breathing…”
“I hope so…”
“oh teri…”mere muh se cigarette chheenkar Arun bola… “If you’re still breathing
then there is still hope.”
“what’s that supposed to mean ?”
“Make your priorties… Create your options.…Then pick up the one… and Do the
action…”
“kya matlab tera…”
“ye matlab hai mera…”laat maarkar mujhe khidki se bahar fek-kar Arun bola
“take it easy… Shagman…”
Aur main full speed ke sath neeche girne laga… girta raha aur girta raha… par
neeche gira nahi… iska karan jan-ne ke liye jab maine aaju-baju nazar dali toh
paya ki… main… main… neeche nahi balki upar gir raha tha. yeah, you heard it
correctly… khidki se girne ke baad main aasman ki taraf khicha ja raha tha wo bhi

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bahut tez speed se… escape speed se… jisne mujhe meri hee duniya se nikal feka aur
wapas mere flat me lejakar mujhe patak diya….
.
“zinda hai sir… mara nahi abhi…”
“marna mat… ambulance ko call karo aur aas-paas ke jitney log ghar ke bahar
aaye hai, sabko andar bhej do… koyi dekhe na aur koyi video na bana paye… ek
kaam kar Shriwas, ambulance ko rahne de… police jeep me hee dal isko… aur
turant hospital lekar ja…”
.
.
Once my Physic professor asked me… Arman, how would you relate your life with
physics and I replied
“Life is like Physics sir, Simple and BeauTiful.”
“ unless we make it complicated… outstanding... top-notch... great, but tell me, why
is it simple and beautiful”
“because of its universal truth and surprising discoveries… we work hard but at the
end, we all die… this is the universal truth and about discoveries… you know more
about this than I do…..
Jiske baad mere class ke sabhi log hasne lage the aur mujhe samajh nahi aaya ki
kyun…? matlab aise fad answer ke baad aap taaliya expect karte hai par mere case
me ulta hua, jis-se main thoda dukhi bhi hua… khair, kya fark padta hai. Mujhe ye
bhi samajh nahi aaya ki wo mujhpar has rahe the ya khud par… kyunki mujhse
pahle sab Physics ko life se jodne wale sawal ke jawab pe wonder of science ka
essay suna rahe the… ye is tarah ka pahla incident tha, jaha log jabran mujhpar
has rahe the… par aakhiri nahi, matlab aise kayi wakye hue… jaha par mere
ekdum deep… thoughtful answers ke bawzood bhi kayi log mujhpar haste the…
jiske baad main samjha ki main chahe achchha karu ya bura, log mera virodh hee
karenge toh kyun na bura hee kiya jaye….. aur wahi maine kiya.
Jab police walo ne mera khopdi fodkar mujhe police jeep me bhara, tabhi main
samajh gaya tha… ki main zinda bach jaunga aur ek din ke andar mujhe hosh aa
jayega. Aisa isliye, kyunki mere ek dost ka accident hua tha, jisme uski khopdi, I
mean… skull foot kar uske brain me ghus gaya tha. maine toh maan liya tha ki wo
nahi bachega… par wo bach gaya aur teen din baad use hosh aa gaya. ye baat alag
hai ki wo kabhi recover nahi ho paya… mere case me toh ye uska 20 % bhi nahi tha
aur jaisa ki mujhe andaza tha… ek din ke andar mujhe hosh aaya…. Ek chiz jo
maine apne baare me aajtak notice ki hai wo ye ki situations jitni kharab hoti hai
mera sense of humour utna hee strong hote jata hai. yani ki kal yadi byluck Arun
mar gaya toh uski maiyyat pe main apni zindagi ka sabse best joke invent
karunga… aur wahi joke mujhe normal kar dega. Kyunki jo chiz mujhe buri lagti
hai, main uska mazak banana shuru kar deta hoon. Phhir chahe wo chiz kitni bhi
buri kyun na ho…
Mere gharwalo se contact karne ki police ki sari koshish nakamyab rahi.. matlab
puri tarah nahi… matlab jab unse USA me contact karke unhe bataya gaya ki unka
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launda India me kya gul khila raha hai toh unhone saaf kah diya ki.. unhe mujhse
koyi matlab nahi, wo jo chahe… mere sath kar sakte hai aur yahi main chahta
tha… yadi meri jagah wo hote aur unki jagah main hota toh main bhi wahi karta…
main bhi wahi kahta ki… wo jo chahe, mere family ke sath kar sakte hai, mera unse
koyi lena-dena nahi. main hamesha se chahta tha ki mera, meri family ke sath
completely break up ho jaye aur aaj mujhe iska sakshat praman mil chuka tha. ab
is-se jyada mere jaise insaan ko aur kya chahiye. Ye toh best hai jo koyi mujhe de
sakta hai. ab toh swayam Robert Downey jr. aakar bhi kahe ki main apni family
walo ke sath ho jaun tab bhi main unki baat na manu… matlab ab aap mere andar
ki nafrat ka andaza laga sakte ho.
.
Toh meri family mujhe bachane nahi aayi aur na hee mere mama-mami, foofa-
foofi, masi-mausa, chacha-chachi…. Aur na hee unke launde-laundiya. Bole toh aaj
Shri Arman completely anath ho gaya tha, warna mujhe pahle yahi lagta tha ki
koyi na koyi toh aayega hee…. Par koyi baat nahi. sabka number lagaunga… ek-ek
ko dagani dunga… karmo ka phal toh bhugatna hee padta hai, maine toh bhugat
liya… ab unki baari hai. pure khandan ko khatam kar dunga… waise bhi ye jyada
mushqil nahi hai. yaha se nikalne ke baad un sabke ghar me ghuskar ek-ek goli hee
toh marni hai bas… kitna maza aayega, mera kitna naam hoga… Whooo… Arman,
The Slaughterer…. BC, Main marta kyun nahi.
.
toh mere hosh aane ke kuch ghante baad police wale mujhe uthakar seedh thane
me le gaye… mujhe jyadatar unhone kamar ke upar hee mara tha, isliye mera pair
thoda safe tha aur main walking stick ki help se dheere-dheere aise chal raha tha,
jaise koyi, kisi ki maiyyat me aaram-aaram se chalta hai… baki kahu apne baki
hisse ki toh mujhe khud nahi pata ki mujhe kaha-kaha kitni chot lagi thi… yaha tak
ki dard ka ahsaas bhi nahi ho raha tha. jiska karan sirf yahi ho sakta hai ki mujhe
medicine ka heavy dose diya gaya ho. main is waqt nashe me bhi tha lekin maine
koyi nasha nahi kiya tha… iski vazah se mujhe andaza hua ki mujhe medicine ka
heavy dose diya gaya hai…. meri aankh puri khul bhi nahi rahi thi aur aaj itne
mahino baad mujhe sone ka bahut mann kar raha tha… par….
“baitha isko idhar… mere saamne… aur iske peechhe khade rahna, kahi gir na
jaye…”ambulance se utar kar jab main ahiste-ahiste chalkar thane ke andar
pahucha toh mujhse ek police wale ne kaha… jo ki mujhse kam smart dikh raha
tha.
Maine uski vardi me nazar dali, uski vardi me lage star dekhe… wo T.I. tha aur wo
wahi shaks tha jiske kanpatti par maine last loot ke dauran katta tana tha… waha
aur bhi kayi police wale the… jinme se teen ko main pahchanta tha. ek tha Sub-
Inspector Shriwas, ek tha Constable- Shiva Prasad aur ek wo tha jiski maa ki
maine maa-bahan ek ki thi… aur ek ye T.I. yani ki teen… sorry char. Maine jiski
maa ko chakli kaha tha wo hath me patti baandhe mujhe gusse se dekhte hue wahi
mere paas me khada tha… maine uski vardi me uska name dekha- Chongeshwar
Maine apne baye hath ki madad se apna dahina hath dheere-dheere upar uthakar
Chongeshwar ki taraf kiya aur use dekhkar hasa… “heeeee… chongu… haaheee..
tu… toh… hawaldar… nikla… be…. Chongu… chodu”

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“shant baith idhar…”mera hath neeche karke T.I. bola “tu toh gaya lambe se… ab
kabool kar le ki NH-6 me ki gayi sari choriya tune ki hai… warna gand me danda
daal ke statement likhwaunga. Police ko tune baklund samajh rakha hai… jo ek
desi katte se puri unit ko ghuma dega… sale itne andar goli marunga na ki doctor
bhi nikal nahi payega… ab le… ye blanck paper aur sign kar…”
maine chup-chap wo blank paper liya aur use dekhne laga… A-4, White paper…
((“ye kaisa gift hai Arman, ek kora kagaz… ye bhi koyi gift deta hai kya…”
“ye ek A-4 size ka blank paper hai.. jisme main aptitude ke 60 questions solve kar
sakta hoon aur wo 60 question kisi bhi exam me kisi bhi shaks ko naukari dilwa
sakte hai…ab chal maan le ki us aadmi ki monthly income 30k hai toh us hisab se
uski annual income hui 360k aur wo minimum 30 saal tak bhi naukari kare toh
uski income hogi yahi kuch……..10.8 Million…aur ye sab kuch hoga sirf is A-4 size
ke kore kagaz se…aur mujhe nahi lagta ki aaj tak tumhe kisi ne 10.8 Million ka
gift bhi diya hoga…. That’s Shri Arman for you……bitches”
Kitni achchhi zindagi thi, Nisha ke sath… kya gore-gore mast doodh the…
khamkha… ))
“kya dekh raha hai…”
“A-4 size… white paper, wor..worth 10.8 Milli…Million Rup…Rupees…”ruk-ruk kar

maine kaha
“kya bola Tune… ye kora kagaz 10.8 million ka hai… lagta hai tere dimag par kuch
jyada hee asar hua hai… chal seedhe se sign kar… warna tere pichhwade me danda
dalkar sign karwane me time nahi lagega…”
“sign kar behanchod….”Chongeshwar bhi taav me aate hue bola…
“sign toh karwa loge….. lekin saabit kaise karoge…… main toh abhi….. yahi….
Swikar karta hoon….. NH-6 ki loot…. maine ki…. Par court me saabit…. kaise
kar..karoge….”bolte hue main khasne laga aur bahut der tak khasta raha…aur
phhir lambi-lambi saans bharkar aage bolne ki koshish ki… par phhir se khasne
laga….
“ k..k..ki..kiiiisi Victim ne shakl… tak nahi dekhi hai meri…. Aur… aur… is khasi ki
toh….. pani la be chodu… I mean, chongu”
“kya bola be tu… phhir se bol…”mera collar pakad kar wo bola…
“pani la be chongu…. Ye bola... aur beta wormhole kya hota hai, padh lena. Agli
class me puchhunga… warna abb…abki baar teri behan ka number lagaunga aur
aisi-aisi lines marunga ki aankh se aansu ki jagah khoon niklega… ab dekh kya
raha hai, T.I. se revolver chheen aur pura revolver khali kar de.. aur bheje me
marna, Bachna nahi magta apun ko….”
“teri toh…”mujhe table se neeche girakar marne ke liye Chongu apna laat uthaya
hee tha ki T.I. ne use hadka kar rukne ke liye kaha… jiske baad mujhe phhir se
table me bithaya gaya….
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“kya bol raha tha tu ki hum log saabit nahi kar payenge… bata toh kaise…”
“pahle paani… Chongu paani la……”lambi-lambi saans bharte hue maine kaha…
jispar Chongu is baar bhi gussa hua par T.I. ke kahne par usne mujhe paani lakar
diya… Mujhe pyas toh lagi thi, par phhir maine Chongeshwar ki taraf haste hue
dekha…
“hat lawda…. thulle”
Jispar T.I. meri taraf dekhkar pahle apna daant chaba aur phhir ekdum shant
aawaz me bola…
“yadi tujhe maarne par tere marne ka dar nahi hota na… toh maa kasam, tujhe
marte dum tak maarta… isliye ab bol aur tu, Chongeshwar… ja, bhagkar ek chay
lekar aa…”
Maine T.I. ki vardi ke star toh dekh liye the, par uska name nahi dekha tha… isliye
maine uski vardi me uska name dekha…
“Madhure… huh, bakwas name…”
“chal aage bol.. bata ki humlog kaise saabit nahi kar payenge”
“mujhe batana toh nahi chahiye… par… anyway. mujhe pakadne ke baad mere
room ki talashi toh li hee hogi… kya mila mere room se…”
Jispar T.I. Madhure ne Shriwas ki taraf apna rookh kiya aur us-se puchha ki mere
room se kya-kya mila hai…
“main hee bata deta hoon ki kya mila hai..”Shriwas ke bolne se pahle hee maine
kaha “ek desi katta, ek revolver jo Maine aapse hee chheeni thi, pachas hazar
cash… ek mobile, mobile ke andar do sim card…ek memory card, jisme 20-30 hd
quality me bf hongi… bas.. aur please bf delete mat karna… Baki kisi bhi victim ne
mera chehra nahi dekha… court me kaise saabit karoge…”
“bete, abhi tu utna bada nahi hua ki police ko chutiya bana sake… tera pichhla
record hai mere paas… upar se tere room me katta mila hai, Gun Smuggling ke
case me thok dunga… uspar S.P. Dangi ki gawahi… aur yadi chah loon toh
Aradhna name ki jis laundi ne tere karan suicide kiya tha… uska case bhi uske
baap ke jariye reopen kara du… ispar se tune jo jungle me do dhamake kiye the..
aatankwadi ghosit kar sakta hoon… tujhe jail me sadane ke liye saboot ki zaroorat
nahi hai mujhe… tere kand hee kafi tujhe jail me sadane ke liye…”
“aur ye sab hoga us Dangi ki gawahi se…? jiske saamne hee maine collector ke
ladke ko pela tha… wo us samay kuch nahi kar paya toh ab kya kar lega… rahi
baat in kands ki jinke dum pe mujhe andar bhejna chahte ho toh… main khud ko
pagal ghosit kar dunga…. Jiski gawahi pata hai kaun-kaun denge…. RVC me rahne
wale Desai ko toh jaante hee hoge… uski beti-Nisha, usi ki tarah rahis uski kuch
friends… Press Editor-Varun, Sharda Enterprises ke General Manager ki beti-
Supriya Sehgal, Sharda Enterprises ki hee Executive Manager- Vandana Rathi…
aur police department ke do log… Inspector-Shriwas aur Constable-Shiva
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Prasad….”Shriwas aur Shiva Prasad ki taraf muskurate hue dekh kar maine kaha “
Ek baar bhid chuke hai mujhse aur court me mera lawyer in dono se hee kabool
karwa lega ki meri dimagi halat kuch thik nahi hai… jiske baad main judge ko bhi
jaan se marne ki dhamki dunga, phhir toh wo mujhe pakka pagalkhane bhejega
aur main kuch mahine me riha…”
T.I. Madhure shant hua aur Shriwas ko apne sath bahar le gaya… is dauran main
wahi baitha baki policewalo ko dekhta raha… T.I. mujhe sahi banda lag raha tha,
par in bakiyo par mujhe bilkul bhi bharosa nahi tha… khaskar ke us chogeshwar
par… kya pata kab pel de... waha se bahar T.I. gaya toh Shriwas ke sath tha par
wapas wo akele aaya… zaroor usne Shriwas ko koyi zaroori kaam saunpa hoga…
.
“katta mila hai tere paas se, uspar teri ungaliyo ke nishan….”
“bluff mat maro…. Kuch bhi karne ke baad main sabse pahle saboot mitata hoon..
room aane ke baad sabse pahle maine katte se apni ungaliyo ke nishan hee mitaye
the… kisi ke nishan nahi hai usme… aur jo 50k cash hai.. wo bhi chori ke nahi hai,
chori walo ko toh maine thikane laga diya… usko trace karte rahna, lamba hath
maroge… mera matlab aisa aadmi pakad me aayega, jiski taalash me kab se ho
tum log…”
“kahna kya….”Madhure bol hee raha tha ki Shriwas beech me aa tapka
“sir… maine us-se contact kiya hai… jis ambulance ko isne loota tha, unme
mauzood ek shaks ne kaha hai ki wo ise dekhega toh pahchan jayega… yadi iske
chehre par khoon dalkar uske saamne le jaye toh wo ise pahchan jayega….”
“ab fasa ye… ab bol…”
“shit…”
“rook ab tu… thodi der me wo aadmi aayega aur tujhe pahchan le bas… phhir
ghusega andar aur abki baar nahi bachega,beta tu….. Shriwas..”
“haan sir…”
“usko bula thane, jisne ise khoon me sana hua dekha hai… bas wo ise pahchan le ek
baar… phhir Chongu… sorry, Chogeshwar… tu apna badla le lena is-se… jaan se
bas mat marna baki… jo karna hoga kar lena… bahut din baad kisi case me maza
aaya hai… mann changa ho gaya pura…. Shiva Prasad chay manga ek…”
“par abhi-abhi toh laya tha…”
“abey toh ek aur manga…. Chay peene me kono burayi thodi hai”
Madhure waha se utha aur mujhe dhamki dekar waha se jaane laga….
“mere khayal se…….”Madhure ko rokne ke liye maine kaha “mere khayal se…
aapke liye ye jyada important hoga ki Rajat Singh Bairangi kaise mara bajay iske
ki wo ambulance kisne loota aur kaise loota… waise bhi wo budhau mara nahi…
par marega zaroor.. aaj nahi toh ek-do hafte baad… par Rajat Singh Bairangi….”
Ye sunkar Madhure ke bahar jate kadam ekdum se rook gaye
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“tu kaise jaanta hai, Rajat Bairangi ko…”
“isme jan-na kya hai, kayi hafto tak uske marne ki khabar newspaper me aayi thi…
sath me ye bhi ki uski maa ka mansik santulan bigad gaya tha, is khabar ke baad…
toh kya decision nikala tha.. Rajat Singh Bairangi ke maut ka.. kahi sach toh nahi
maan liya ki asthama ka marij hone ke karan talab me saans phoolne se uski maut
ho gayi”
“jab uske dost mandir ke andar the tab Rajat Bairangi pavitra kund me nahane
gaya aur kyunki wo asthama ka patient tha uski saans phoolne se wo wahi kund
me doob gaya….”
“seems logical… par kya uske dosto ki chhan-been ki…”
“ek Nagpur ka local hai, ek Haryana se, ek Bihar se aur ek Uttar Pradesh se… wo
sab Rajat ke college friends the… maine unka bayan bhi liya tha… family
background bhi check kiya tha. clear hai…”
“yadi mera bhi family background check karoge toh wo bhi clear hee niklega…”
“unka bayan liya tha maine unhone kaha ki Rajat unhe bina bataye kund me
nahane utar gaya, jab wo sab mandir ke andar the… unhone Rajat ko aas-paas
dhoondha bhi, par wo unhe kahi nahi mila… toh unhe laga ki shayad Rajat car ke
paas hoga, isliye wo Mandir ke peechhe bane kund ki taraf jaane ki bajay car ki
taraf gaye…. Par Rajat waha bhi nahi tha…. ek minute…. Par main ye sab tujhe
kyun bata raha hoon.. aur Shriwas tune us ambulance wale ko call kiya ya nahi…”
“abhi karta hoon…”bolkar Shriwas waha se bahar jaane laga…
“kya ho, agar main bolu ki Rajat ko uske dosto ne hee dooba kar mara hai toh…
sochane wali baat hai…”maine kaha jis-se Shriwas jaha tha, wahi rook gaya aur
Madhure pahle ke mafiq bina expression change kiye mujhe dekhta raha….
“sir, ye sendi laga raha hai… iski baat mat suno…” Shriwas ne Madhure se kaha…
“pura dimag se khatam hai, kisi se bhi kuch bhi bolta rahta hai…”
“thik hai phhir… mat suno aur mujhe andar kar do… lekin tab kya hoga jab
Siddhart Singh Bairangi ko pata chalega ki Police walo ne jaan-buchkar uske bete
ke khoon aur khooni ko chhipaya… bahut bhayankar marega tum sabko band
karke…”
“5 minute… sab bak”apne hath ki paancho ungaliya mujhe dikhate hue Madhure
ne kaha “aur Shriwas, tu us aadmi ko chhod aur turant Bairangi ke ghar me call
karke bol ki humlog waha aa rahe hai… unke bete ki maut se related kuch
information hai humare paas… aur tu, Shiva Prasad… tu kya sun raha hai.. ja
bhagkar chay le aa aur tu, kya name hai tera… tu jo jaanta hai bak dal aur saboot
ke sath…”
“aapko pata hai sir, maine kafi online aur offline news padhi Rajat Singh Bairangi
ke maut ko lekar… bahut dimag lagaya, par kahi se koyi clue hee nahi mil raha
tha… jiske baad maine iske baare me sochna chhod diya, par phhir ekdin main
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flashback me gaya… aapko bata doon ki main aksar flashback me jata rahta hoon
ya phhir time travel… abhi main ispe sure nahi hoon, matlab na toh ise completely
flashback bola ja sakta hai aur na hee completely time travel… kyunki jab-jab past
me jakar maine ghatnao ko change karne ki koshish ki… toh uske consequences
change hee nahi hue. Time travel… aap jaante ho na time travel kya chiz hai…
aapne Physics padhi hai ? mera matlab aapne 11th me kaun sa subject liya tha…
actually, main kahna ye chah raha hoon ki… time travel physical way me lagbhag
impossible hai kyunki yadi time travel possible hota toh… yani past, present,
future teeno ka alag-alag astitva hota toh future ke log time travel karke kab ka
humare paas nahi aa gaye hote…? Ya phhir ek theory ye bhi hai ki past kisi bhi
time-space me exist hee nahi karta… Isiliye physical way me, ye impossible hai
lekin yadi baat ki jaye brain ke through time travel ki toh…”
“sun be… dimag mat khiska tu mera.. jitna puchh raha hoon utna bata…”
“matlab 11th me commerce ya arts liya tha… hai na.. never mind”
“Arts…”
“thik hai phhir mudde pe aata hoon… yadi Rajat Bairangi apne dosto ke sath
ghoomne gaya tha toh wo akele us kund ya taalab me nahane kyun ghusega. upar
se jab use maloom ho ki wo asthama ka patient hai… wo bhi apne dosto ko bina
bataye… mera matlab main toh aisa kabhi nahi karta aur uske dosto ne bayan
diya kiya ki wo log Rajat ke na milne par car ki taraf gaye… ab gaur karne wali
baat ye hai ki jaha parking-varking ki suvidha hai.. wo mandir se 400 meters ki
doori par hai… 400 meters….? Utni door bhala koyi kyun jayega, upar se jab wo
waha ghoomne gaye the toh plan bhi banaya hoga ki kitne baje tak unhe wapas
aana hai aur according to news paper, wo sham ko wapas aane wale the. isliye
Rajat Singh Bairangi ke naa milne par mandir ke aas-paas dhoondhane ki bajay
seedhe car ki taraf jane ka uske dosto ka bayan.. irrelevant hai. kabhi statements
wale question aapne solve kiya hai, jisme do-teen statements diye rahte hai aur
choice diya rahta hai ki… kaun-kaun se statements sahi hai. usme jo-jo statements
irrelevant hote hai usko elimination method se hatakar answer mark karna hota
hai… same concept. uske dost jhooth bol rahe hai… off season hone ke karan us din
mandir me unke siwa koyi nahi tha, un charo ne Rajat ko jabran dooba-dooba kar
mara hai…”
“saboot kya hai….”
“us-se pahle mera ek sawal…. Aapko mere ghar ka mera matlab mere flat ka mera
matlab E-6 ka thikana kaise mila… jabki main toh police ko jungle me bahut
peechhe pachhad chuka tha…. E-6 me main rahta hoon iski khabar kaisi mili
aapko….”
Mere is sawal par Madhure muskuraya aur ek hath me Shiva Prasad se chay ka
cup lekar, dusare hath me apni revolver nikal kar mujhe dikhate hue bola…
“yaad hai, tune mujhse ye revolver chheena tha…”
“haan…toh..”

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“iske andar electronic sensor hai…. jo GPS ki tarah kaam karta hai… Shriwas, kya
name tha iska.. arm telem..”
“firearm telematics…”pura karte hue maine kaha “iske jariye ye pata chalta hai ki
gun kaha hai, kis disha me kaise fix hai aur kitne round fire ho chuke hai… salaa…
maine socha nahi tha ki India me itni jaldi aa jayegi ye technique… anyway.. Rajat
Singh ke jin char dosto ke aapne naam liye unme se do Daddu ke aadmi hai…
matlab hai charo Daddu ke aadmi par do ko main sabit kar sakta hoon… jo Daddu
ke gang me shamil hee isiliye hue the… taaki Rajat Bairangi ko uda sake… phhir
Daddu ne unhe Nagpur ke us college me bheja… jaha Rajat Bairangi padhta tha…
unki umra kam thi, isliye kisi ne shaq nahi kiya…”
“tu Daddu ko kaise jaanta hai…”chauk-kar chay ka cup side me rakhte hue
Madhure bola aur Shriwas ke aalawa sabko bahar bhej diya…
“mere room se jo katta mila hai, wo usi se khareeda hai… par aage main bolu, us-se
pahle mujhe surety chahiye ki main yaha se bedaag niklunga….”
“ye possible nahi hai..”
“Siddharth Bairangi possible karega…. Aur waise bhi NH-6 ke loot ka pura ilzaam
Daddu ke upar daal dena, sath me aaj ka bomb visfot bhi… tareeka main batata
hoon”
“Daddu teri ghar ki kheti hai kya be… Siddharth Bairangi toh kuch ukhad nahi
paya aaj tak… tu kya kar lega… tu use in chindi cases me fasana chahta hai… abey
ek saal pahle Ganga-jamuna ke sabse bheed-bhad ilake me ek LIC agent ka gala ret
diya tha aur koyi kuch ukhad tak nahi paya… kyunki itni jansankhya me kisi ko
kya fark padta hai… sab do-char din ke baad bhool jate hai…”
“I’m with you on that… lekin abki baar koyi aam chutiya nahi balki , Bairangi ka
launda… sorry , respect… ladka mara hai aur rahi baat Daddu ke nikalne ki
toh……. Use criminal ghosit mat karo… aatankvadi ghosit karo… phhir koyi nahi
bacha payega use…”
“aur wo kaise…”pura chay ek ghoot me marte hue Madhure bola… abhi tak toh wo
normally meri baat me react kar raha tha par abki baar wo khud ke emotions ya
expression.. jo bhi bolte hai, uspe control nahi kar paya aur muh se saans lete hue
Shriwas ki taraf bade ashcharya se dekhne laga…
“wo main Sidharth uncle ke ghar pe bataunga… taaki unhe bhi toh Shri Arman ke
baare me pata chale… warna pura credit khud le loge…. Aur ek baat, mujhe
bewkoof banane ki koshish mat karna… kyunki maine isme 1440 ghante waste kiye
hai. in short, I’m eminently eminent, Yaani utkrisht roop se utkrisht. waise mere
original plan me police shamil nahi thi… par kya fark padta hai... toh chale…”
“chal.. par uske pahle…ek…”
“ek chay.. kyunki… chay peene me kono burayi thodi hai…”

.

352
Main, T.I. Madhure aur S.I. Shriwas… Bairangi ke bunglow me pahuche… Bairangi
kahne ke liye bas ex-mla tha… waha ki protection toh aisi thi jaise koyi bahut bada
cabinet minister ho… mujhe kafi utsukta thi, is baat ko lekar ki Siddharth Bairangi
dikhta kaisa hoga.. kya wo Daddu ki tarah kadak, jordar, tez-tarrar hoga ya phhir
single haddi… maine newspaper me uski ek passport size photo dekhi thi, par photo
kuch saaf nahi thi, isliye filhal yaha aane se pahle main uske huliye ka bas andaza
laga sakta tha…
“baithiye, wo thodi der me aayenge…”ek jawan ladke ne hume ek room me

baithaya aur waha se chala gaya…
Us ladke ke waha se jaane ke baad maine sofe me apna sar tikaya aur sar tika-kar
apni aankhe band kar li, kyunki ab dheere-dheere puri body me ajeeb-ajeeb tarah
ka feel ho raha tha aur main bas aankh band karke sona chahta tha par jaise hee
maine apni aankhe band ki, mera sar itni bhayankar tarike se ghooma ki… jaise
ganja piya hua hoon. mujhe kuch hosh-o-hawas hee nahi raha… tabhi mere dimag
me ek picture ghoomi… jisme kisi jagah, jaha kafi andhera tha… waha koyi ladki
lahu-luhan padi thi… uska chehra mujhe bilkul bhi nahi dikh raha tha par aawaz
jani-pahchani thi aur jab maine us ladki ko dekha toh usne ektak mera name
liya….
“please mujhe mat maro… tum jo bologe main karungi…”
“aye…. Uth… kya hua… so gaya kya… uth….”
“kuch nahi…”apni aankhe band kiye hue hee main bola “mujhe aisa lagta hai
jaise…. maine abhi-abhi kisi ka khoon kiya hai…”
“mazak mat kar sir ke saamne… chal thik se baith…”
Mujhe laga Bairangi aa gaya hoga par ye Bairangi nahi tha… yeee toh police
uniform me hai… acha… Superintendent of police…
“hello sir…”maine apna hath S.P. ki taraf badhaya… par mujhse hath milana toh
door usne meri taraf dekha tak nahi aur Madhure se puchha…
“yahi hai wo…”
“haan sir, yahi hai…”
“aur tu bina mujhe bataye ise seedhe yaha le aaya… dimag kaha hai tera ? seedhe
Bairangi ko call karne ki kya zaroorat thi… tu police ke liye kaam karta hai ya
Bairangi ke liye…. Aainda aisa nahi hona chahiye aur tu…. Kya jaanta hai tu…”
“wo toh main…. Bairangi ji ko hee bataunga…. Kisi aur pe bharosa nahi kar sakta
main…”
“star dekh ke kuch bola kar… is jile ka S.P. hoon main… koyi mamooli T.I. ya S.I.
nahi...”
“toh…?”khada hone ki koshish karte hue maine kaha…

353
Aur hum dono ke beech ye toh…toh … wali chugalbandi hoti uske pahle hee
Madhure uthkar S.P. ke paas pahucha aur uske kaan me sari baat batane laga….
aur Madhure apni jagah par wapas aaya toh S.P. kafi der tak meri taraf aise
dekhta raha… jaise usne sakshat bhagwan ke darshan kar liye ho….
“tu khada kyun hai…”Madhure ne mujhse puchha…
“Bairangi ji ka bulawa aayega….”
“sixth sense… ab bhi kaam karta hai mera…”
“kya matlab…”
“matlab ye ki….”samane darwaje ke bahar ek shaks ko jis room me hum baithe the,
us taraf aate dekh maine kaha… “matlab ye ki… Bairangi ji aa gaye…. Hello sir…”
“kaun ye aur Bairangi….hahaha…”wo teeno ek sath mujhpar has pade….
“ye Bairangi nahi hai…?”Madhure ki taraf dekhkar maine puchha…
“abey chutiye, ye Bairangi ka naukar hai… aur chay-pani puchhane aaya hai…
bahut badhiya hai tera sixth sense… yadi Rajat ke bhi case me tera sixth sense aisa
hee raha na toh… Bairangi hee tujhe marwa dega… Daddu se kam mat samajhna
Bairangi ko….”
“hat sala..role marne ke chakkar me bezzati ho gayi….”chup-chap dande ka sahara

lekar baith-te hue maine kaha…
.
Naukar ne kisko kya chahiye wo puchha aur waha se chalta bana… Madhure ne as
expected chay ka order diya tha aur maine daru ka… par mujhe nahi lagta ki
Bairangi ka naukar daru lekar aayega…. Kyunki usne mere daru bolne par jis
tareeke se ghoora tha, mujhe nahi lagta ki wo mere liye daru layega…..
“isko bhi pelunga lawda, mujhe aankh dikhata hai… tu mil bahar”
.
Aur phhir Bairangi ne room me entry mari… uske sath, uske peechhe, uska naukar
tha, jo hath me chay ki tray liye hue tha…
“ye toh khatam insaan hai… dekh ke lagta hai ki kal hee mar jayega… marna mat
be madarchod, warna lawde lag jayenge mere…..”Bairangi ko dekhkar muskurate
hue maine socha….
Sidharth Singh Bairangi 65-70 saal ka, wheelchair me sawar budhau tha…mujhe
toh laga tha ki Daddu ki tarah hast-pust randi chodne wala hoga… lekin iski wheel-
chair toh khud koyi dusara dhakel raha tha… par Bairangi tha bahut manners
wala… usne sabse hath jodkar namaskar kiya aur phhir mujhe dekh ke kuch ishara
kiya…

354
“sorry.. main samjha nahi…”
“sarkar puchh rahe hai ki aapki ye halat kaise hui…”uske peechhe khade naukar ne
mujhe kaha…
“in logo ne….”Madhure ki taraf ungali karke maine kaha…
Aur mere ungali karte hee Madhure jo bade maje lekar chay pee raha tha, wo
khasne laga… iske baad Bairangi ki taraf se S.P. ne pahal ki, usne bhi mujhse wahi
sawal puchhe jo Madhure ne thane me baitha ke puchha tha…
“tujhe kaise pata ki wo charo Daddu ke aadmi the…”
“kuch hafte pahle Ganga-Jamuna ke nale se ek ladki ki laash mili hogi… name
mujhe pata nahi, par uska khoon mere aankho ke saamne hua tha… Daddu ne
mujhe darane ke liye mujhe pura live show dikhaya tha”
“kaun ladki…”
“apne hath peechhe mat hatao…wo ladki koyi aur nahi balki aap hee ke
department ke liye kaam kar rahi thi aur isiliye Daddu ne use jaan se mar dala…”
Mere ye bolte hee Bairangi, S.P. ko dekhkar saanp ki tarah fusfusaya… jis-se S.P. ki
hawa tight hui…
“haan.. haan yaad aaya… mujhe uski maut ka afsos hai…”
“wakayi…”
“haan..”
“kamal hai dekh ke toh aisa nahi lagta…khair, uske marne ke baad Police ne uska
sath chhod diya, lekin…”
“lekin… tu pahle ye bata ki tu waha Daddu ke sath kya kar raha tha… ? Bairangi ji,
kahi ye ladka hume double cross toh nahi kar raha…”
“uspe baad me aayenge… toh jis ladki ko tum logo ne marne ke liye chhod diya,
maine Jagat ke through, jo ki Sharda Vihar me kaam karta hai….us ladki ke bhai
se contact kiya… jis-se mujhe ye pata chala ki wo kuch saal pahle Daddu ke yaha
hee kaam karta tha aur shadi hone ke baad usne Daddu ka kaam chhod diya tha.
aksar hum log nayi zindagi jeene ka sapna dekhte hai… usne bhi dekha. Par uska
yahi sapna uski behan ki zindagi le dooba… mera matlab khunnas me Daddu ne
uski behan ko, jab wo maal bani toh jabran Ajmeri bai ke kothe ki veshya bana
diya… Bairangi ji… aapke bete ke jo wo char dost the, unse Rajat ki friendship
college me hee hui thi… aur Engineering complete kiye hue unhe ek saal beet chuka
tha yani ki kul milakar hue paanch saal aur wo jab Daddu se mile the tab mera wo
aadmi Daddu ke yaha hee kaam karta tha… us bechare ko Daddu ko chhodna kafi
mahanga pada… pahle uski behan veshya bani aur jab uski behan ko Daddu ne
berahmi se maar diya toh wo Daddu ke khilaf na jaye, isliye Daddu ne uski biwi ko
bhi Ajmeri bai ke kothe ki rakhail bana diya hai… khair ye badi baat nahi hai, aise
logo ke sath aisa hee hona chahiye… we all have to pay the prize for our sins and if
355
you didn’t , then you will…. toh maine usi aadmi ko news paper me chhape aapke
bete ke dosto ki jab tasveer dikhayi toh usne do ko turant pahchan liya…”
“chal thik hai.. maan le ki hum Daddu ko police custody me lete hai, lekin uska kya
hoga… wo bol dega ki ye mere purane aadmi the.. ab uska unse koyi lena-dena
nahi hai… tujhe kya lagta hai ki humne Daddu ko kabhi remand ya custody par
nahi liya ? humne kayi baar use remand par liya hai… lekin wo har baar aise hee
hathkande apna kar nikal jata hai… uske sare gande kaam me aise log faste hai
jinka us-se koyi connection nahi hota… ab in char ladko k…..”S.P. mere saamne
apni baat rakh hee raha tha ki Bairangi ji ki gand fat gayi…
mera matlab, wo rone lage… aur bahut jor-jor se rone lage… matlab itne jor se ki
mujhe bhi unki halat dekh-kar bura laga…. kahi suna tha ki aaulaad ki maut se
bada dukh ek maa-baap ke liye koyi dusara nahi hota.. Bairangi apne launde ko
toh nahi bacha paya, par mere jariye wo badla toh le hee sakta tha. bas use meri
kuch shart bas man-ni thi. jisme ek shart ye bhi thi ki.. yadi main aur Daddu, hum
dono yadi aaj raat ke baad zinda bach gaye toh mujhe jail me Daddu se 5 minute
free time chahiye. jisme main pahle 3 minute use bahut maarta aur phhir aakhiri
ke 2 minute me use maarne ka reason batata………………..
Bairangi apne bete ka naam le-lekar ro raha tha aur aise ro raha tha ki uske naak,
muh sab jagah se material bahar aa raha tha…. main Bairangi ko yun mere
saamne rota dekh kafi der tak dekhta raha… kabhi-kabhi mujhe kafi bura lagta toh
kabhi-kabhi hasi aati… main khud kafi confuse tha ki main aakhir dikhana kya
chahta hoon is sabke bawzood maine apni in dono feelings ko daba kar rakha hua
tha aur dabane me main bahut mahir hoon, phhir chahe wo feelings ho ya
doodh……
Khair, Bairangi ko rota dekh S.P. role marte hue turant khada hokar unhe dilasa
dene laga aur naukar ko kaha ki… wo Bairangi ji ko waha se le jaye… aur is tarah
Bairangi ji apne bete ke naam se rote hue waha se chale gaye….
.
“toh saabit kaise karega ki un char ladko ne Daddu ke kahne par Rajat ka khoon
kiya hai…”Bairangi ke waha se jaane ke baad wapas mudde par aate hue S.P. ne
kaha
“main ye saabit nahi kar paunga… main kaise saabit kar sakta hoon, abhi aapne
hee toh kaha ki Daddu kafi chalak hai, wo apne kand un logo se karwata hai jinka
us-se koyi connection nahi hota…. Ye sab toh maine Bairangi ji ki attention paane
ke liye kiya, you know, I’m attention seeking whore”
“phhir kya yaha jhakk marne ke liye laya hai… Rajat ke maut par toh hume bhi
Daddu par shaq tha”chilla kar S.P. bola…
“aapke is sawal par main aapke us sawal ka jawab dunga, jisme aapne mujhse
puchha tha ki… us din jab wo ladki mere aankho ke saamne mari thi toh main
waha kya kar raha tha… par pahle mujhe cigarette chahiye… mera gala sookh
raha hai…”
“gala sookh raha hai toh paani pee na…”

356
“gala sookhne par paani aamlog peete hai, main cigarette peeta hoon.. this is The
Arman Style…”
.
Maine Police walo par lead le li thi isliye yadi ab main unki behan ki choot bhi
magta to bhi wo mujhe dete, phhir toh yaha sirf cigarette ki baat thi… Shriwas
turant gaya aur Cigarette ka packet lekar aaya…
“yeeee… ye wali nahi peeta main… isme jab dhua andar leta hoon toh seena nahi
jalta… mujhe seena jalane wali cigarette chahiye.. warna peene ka maja hee kya…
ja bhagkar dusara lekar aa…”
“kyaaaa… kya… kya bola tu…”taav me aakar Shriwas bola…
“I said… dusara lekar aa… dusara… mahangi wali, wo nahi jo tu peeta hai… chal ja
ab… ghoorta kya hai”
“sir.. ye mujhse aise kaise baat kar raha hai…”S.P. se shikayat karte hue Shriwas
bola…
“ye bhai.. tu jana… jaldi se dusara packet le ke aa… kyun itta bhav kha raha
hai…”Madhure ne Shriwas se kaha “aur jab jaa hee raha hai toh, ek cup chay ke
liye bhi bol dena… waise maine chay pee toh abhi hee thi, par phhir se pee lunga…
wo kya hai ki chay peene me kono burayi toh hai nahi… kyun S.P. sahab”
Shriwas mere liye cigarette lene gaya aur idhar maine phhir se bolna chalu kiya…
“ toh aapke is sawal par ki main ye kaise saabit karunga ki Daddu ke kahne par un
char logo ne Rajat ka khoon kiya… aapke is sawal par main aapke us sawal ka
jawab dunga, jisme aapne mujhse puchha tha… ki… us din jab wo ladki mere
aankho ke saamne mari thi toh main waha kya kar raha tha… ! main us din waha
Daddu ko 100 desi katte ka order dene gaya tha, jisme se ek main sample ke taur
par laya bhi tha… jo ki Madhure ji ki hirasat me hai…”
Iske baad Madhure aur S.P. ne jo reaction diya use dekh kar maine jana ki waha
main akela nahi tha jo apni feelings daba raha tha. kyunki mere sau katte ki order
ki baat sunkar wo dono normal hee rahe… aisa sirf do hee condition me ho sakta
tha… first, ya toh wo apni feelings daba rahe the ya phhir, second… unhe ye sab
pahle se hee maloom tha aur wo Daddu se mile hue honge. I prefer the first option.
“haan sir… sahi bol raha hai ye… iske room se desi katta mila hai… thik usi model
ka, jo model Daddu smuggling karta hai… par jaldbazi me main jyada soch nahi
paya”chay ka peg apne hath me uthakar Madhure bola….
“mujhe pata hai ki aap sab yahi soch rahe honge ki main kaun hoon aur main sau
desi katto ka kya karunga, kaha le jaunga, kise dunga… wagerah-wagerah… par
sach kahu toh main isi jariye Daddu ko fasana chahta tha… mujhe un guns se koyi
lena-dena nahi… use aap rakh sakte ho.. Daddu ka maal pakdo, use naxalite ya
aatankwadi ghosit karke goli mar do ya jail me dal do… mujhe koyi matlab nahi..”

357
“ab sari baat clear ho gayi….”S.P. bola“tu bolta hai tujhe koyi matlab nahi… par
main shuru se hee soch raha hoon ki jab tujhe koyi matlab nahi toh phhir tu Daddu
se bhida kyun.. tune NH-6 me loot-maar ki, Daddu se deal ki, Rajat Bairangi ke
khoon ka sabot yaha Bairangi ji ko diya… par kyun.. mere khayal se tujhe pahle se
hee andaza tha ki NH-6 me humlog tujhe ek na ek din pakad hee lenge isliye tune
bachne ke liye Rajat Bairangi ke maut ki jaanch-padtal ki aur Bairangi ji ko botal
me utara…. Phhir Daddu ko pakadwane ka lalach dekar tu police walo ko botal me
utarna chah raha hai… yadi sabko milaya jaye toh result ye nikalta hai ki tune
laakho ki loot ki aur phhir aise hee bachkar nikal jayega… Police kahi ise baad me
dhokha na de de… isiliye tune bete ki maut se tadap rahe Bairangi ji ko apne
paksha me kiya… taaki baad me kuch bhi ho Bairangi ji, us shaks ka sath toh kabhi
nahi chhodenge, jisne unke sabse bade dushman aur unke bete ke khooni ko
pakadwaya… sab teri chaal thi aur hum isme faste gaye… hume tujhe kabhi yaha
nahi lana chahiye tha.. ye sari baate toh tu waise bhi hume batata, aaj nahi toh
kal… pyar se nahi toh maar se…”
“kamal hai, toh ab Daddu ko chhodkar main Police ka dushman ho gaya… aapne
Ganga-Jamuna ke drishya nahi dekha… aapne un ladkiyo ki aur un ladkiyo ke
pariwar walo ki zindagi nahi dekhi… jinko Daddu chand paiso ke laalach me
rakhail bana deta hai… uspar se aap log kuch karte nahi aur yaha main kuch kar
raha hoon, kanoon ki madad kar raha hoon toh aapko problem ho rahi hai…? ab
iske badle maine chand rupaye loote toh isme kya burayi hai… maine ulta logo ko
sikhaya hai ki unhe raat me apne ghar se nikalte waqt apni safety ke baare me bhi
sochna chahiye aur yadi mujhe yaha nahi late toh bhi main yaha se nikal jata…
kyunki pahle main ek plan banata hoon aur phhir us ek plan ke liye dusara aur
phhir us dusare ke liye teesara… is tarah ye continuous chalte rahta hai aur mere
paas infinite plans hote hai, kisi bhi situation se nikalne ke liye… so trust me, you
cant do much in my case. I’m the best and the beast…”
“karne kya wala tha un desi katto ka…”
“Haryana me char random jagah par Daddu un katto ko deliver karta…”
“ Guns Haryana ke liye kab niklenge…”
“time kya hua hai…”
“5 pm”
“ 4 ghante baad yani 8 baje guns Haryana ke liye niklenge….7 baje main Daddu ko
call karunga, wo mujhe apna wo gupt adda batayega jaha mujhe jakar bache hue
2-3 laakh rupaye dene honge… phhir main Daddu ko call kar-kar ke root bataunga
aur wo apne aadmiyo ko…”
.
“aapko, sarkar bula rahe hai upar…”isi beech Bairangi ka naukar room me
daakhil hua aur mujhse bola…
“main bhi chalta hoon..”apni jagah se khada hokar S.P. ne kaha, par Bairangi ke
naukar ne kaha ki sirf mujhe hee bulane ke liye kaha hai…

358
Main waha se utha aur dheere-dheere naukar ke peechhe jaane laga… mujhe laga
tha ki upar ki seedhiya chadhte hue Bairangi ka naukar meri madad karega… par,
usne ek baar jo aage chalna shuru kya kiya…. Behanchod chalta hee gaya. wo toh
mann nahi tha mera, warna jis lathi ke sahare main chal raha tha, wahi fek ke
marta.
Istarah langdate hue, railings pakad-pakad kar main Bairangi ke room me

pahucha. Bairangi apne room me wheelchair me ek kone me chup-chap baitha
tha… uska naukar mujhe waha chhodkar chala gaya, jiske baad Bairangi kafi
samay tak khamosh raha… kafi samay tak matlab kafi samay tak… jis dauran time
pass karne ke liye main Bairangi ke room me nazar daudane laga.. Bairangi ke
room ki deewaro me ek taraf mural thi matlab deewaro par jo artwork ya painting
ki jati hai… wahi… jisme ek aurat thi, khud Bairangi tha aur uska launda… jo kisi
park ke saamne khade the. main kafi der tak us wall mural ko dekhta raha tab
mujhe dhyan aaya ki ye jo park ya garden hai ye Bairangi ke ghar me hee toh hai.
uske baad bhi jab Bairangi ne mujhse kuch nahi kaha toh main chhat ki taraf
dekhne laga… aur main ye jaankar aashcharya-chakit rah gaya ki uske room me
kahi bhi fan nahi hai… matlab aisa kaise ho sakta hai…
“AC be…”
“phhir bhi…”
“abey, tu jo karne aaya hai wo karna…”
“bahut attitude hai mere andar… main aage se baat nahi karunga.”bolkar main
Bairangi ke room ka size, deewaro ki height calculate karne laga aur kafi der tak
karta raha…
“tum..he… tumhe isss… iske badle me kyaaaa chahiye…”jor lagakar Bairangi

bola…
“kabhi pankha lagwaoge toh yaha lagwana…”chhat me ek taraf ungali dikha kar
maine kaha “aur pankhe ka size 56” rahna chahiye…”
“maine ye nahi puchha tha shayad…”
“kuch der ke liye 3 laakh rupaye… jo Daddu ko pakadne ke baad police aapko
wapas kar degi.. mere upar saare loot-maar ke case ka rafa-dafa aur yadi police
Daddu ko pakad legi toh uske sath lockup me paaaaanch… paaaanch
minute”maine kaha aur apna sar dabane laga… “ achanak se tez dard kyun shuru
hua… bas aaj raat bhar sath de de… phhir tera ilaaz karaunga”
“jo tum kar rahe ho, wo beshak mere liye toh nahi kar rahe… phhir bhi main
tumhara sath dunga, lekin tumhare crimes ki puri file gayab karna… ye mumkin
nahi hai… kuch rules hote hai.. jise hume follow karna padta hai, jinhe toda nahi
jaa sakta..”
“isiliye aaj tak Daddu ko Police daboch nahi payi, warna.. anyway, what I want to
say is … sometimes we have to break the rules in order to protect them…”
…
…
359
Aur phhir sham ko 7 baje maine Daddu ko call kiya, usne mujhe ek address bataya
jaha mujhe us-se final mulaqat karni thi. jis jagah mujhe Daddu ne bulaya tha
main waha pahle bhi ja chuka tha… exact waha nahi, par us jagah ke paas hee wo
eorkshop tha, jaha se maine silencer banwaya tha. Police ne mujhe taiyar karke
bole toh pata nahi kya-kya mere andar fit karne lage… yaha tak ki mera makeup
bhi kiya taaki mere chehre ke nishan mit jaye…
“Daddu ne talashi le li toh..? mera mobile trace karte rahna… location toh mil hee
jayega… waise bhi dusara tracker kaam pe laga hua hai… ”maine kaha..
“aaj se pahle usne kabhi taalashi li hai teri…?”chay ka cup uthakar Madhure ne
puchha…
“nahi…”
“phhir… aaj kya usko sapna aayega. Waise bhi tere bomb dhamake aur colony me
tere arrest hone ki news kahi bahar nahi gayi hai… isliye Daddu ke liye tu ab bhi
wahi hai, jo kal tha…”
“done…”thumbup karke maine kaha…
“tujhe Shriwas, auto me baithakar us jagah le jayega.. par Shriwas par jyada
depend mat rahna kyunki wo tujhe chhodkar waha se turant wapas aa jayega…”
“done…”
“kya kaha tune ki jaha Daddu ne tujhe bulaya hai… wo koyi storehouse hai… kya
rakhta hai Daddu waha… tu sure hai na ki wo ek storehouse hai”
“storehouse… repository… warehouse, kuch bhi kah lo.. aur main sure isliye hoon
kyunki kal Police ko lootne yani aapko lootne se pahle main wahi gaya tha. exact
toh nahi… par usi storehouse ke paas me ek workshop hai.. waha se mujhe pata
chala ki wo jagah hai kya…”
“workshop me kyun gaya tha…”
“silencer banwane… main us workshop ka name deta hoon, use pakad ke batti do.
Sala, paiso ke lalach me kisi ke liye kuch bhi kar deta hai…”
“chay piyega…”
7:30 baje main us jagah pahucha jaha Daddu mera intezaar kar raha tha. Shriwas
auto chalak ke roop me mujhe yaha chhodne aaya tha aur uske jaane ke baad
maine wo sab kuch nikal ke fek diya… jo police ne jagah-jagah mere kapdo me fit
kiya tha aur apne purane plan ke mutabiq aage badha kyunki mujhe yakin tha ki
mere mobile ko police trace karke location ka pata kar hee legi… itna toh main kar
leta hoon, wo toh phhir bhi Police hai aur nahi bhi kar payi toh dusara tracker toh
hai hee….

360
ye jagah Ganga-Jamuna se 10-12 km aage tha… koyi godam ki tarah… par tha pura
khali, waha na toh koyi saaman tha aur na hee koyi truck.. waha Daddu tha aur
hamesha ki tarah uske 15-20 aadmi… mujhe dar toh lag raha tha ki kahi ye meri
taalashi na le le lekin phhir bhi use dekhkar main muskuraya aur langadate-
langadate uski taraf badha….
“tujhe kya hua… langda kar kyun chal raha hai”mujhe dekhkar Daddu ne kaha….
“accident… gadi se gir gaya tha kal raat me… badi mushqil se aaya hoon, you
know, I’m the man of my word”Bag upar uthakar maine kaha “ isme baki ke paise
hai…”
“aur paiso ke sath me tracker bhi… hai na..”
“kya..ha..ha…haha”haste hue maine kaha
“yahi… yahi… kya bolte hai usko… reaction.. haan, reaction… yahi reaction mera
bhi tha, jab mere aadmiyo ne mujhse ye kaha tha…”
“phhir ye raha bag… check kar lo…”paiso wala bag zameen par patak kar main
bola… jiske baad Daddu ke do aadmi turant meri taraf aaye…
Un do me se ek ne bag pakda aur ek ne mujhe… ek bag ki taalashi lene laga, toh

dusara meri aur dono hee jagah Daddu ke aadmiyo ko mayoosi jhelni padi…
“hath chhod be… dikhayi nahi de raha kya ki mere hath me zakhm hai…”
“kamal hai… mera aadmi galat kaise ho sakta hai…”
Tabhi Daddu ke aadmiyo ke beech me se mere barabar hee ek ladka nikalkar

saamne aaya aur mujhse mera mobile manga… maine us ladke ko dekha. Simple
jeans aur t-shirt me.. power wala chashma lagaye, ek patla-dubla ladka mere
saamne khada tha.
“ye kaun hai…”mobile wala topic divert karne ke liye maine kaha “kamal hai,
Daddu bhai… ab aise mare hue logo ko bhi kaam par lagne lage… isko toh main ek
hath se mar du… hahaha… waise, Daddu bhai.. yadi aapka ye checking-veking
wala karyakram ho gaya ho toh… mujhe maal dikhayenge… mujhe apne upar bhi
baat karni hai…”
“pahle apna mobile dikha…”us launde ne apna hath aage badha kar kaha…
“main kaam ke waqt mobile nahi rakhta… distract ho jata hoon…”
“nanga karke mobile dhoondh nikalo iska…” us ladke ne Daddu ke aadmiyo se

kaha…
Uske aisa karte hee main samajh gaya ki mujhe yaha nahi aana chahiye tha…
mujhe police par bharosa nahi karna chahiye tha, yadi main apne pahle hee plan
par chalta jo ki thoda heroic tha, toh shayad main bach bhi jata, isiliye toh VR ke
flat par raat-o-raat jump marne ki practice ki thi… ki mauke par yaha se escape

361
kar jaun… zaroor Police me hee koyi Daddu ka kutta raha hoga.. khair, ab kya fark
padta hai.
“kuch nahi hai…”Daddu ke aadmi meri taalashi lene ke baad bole…
“ kuch nahi hai…? 10 ka ek sikka tha… chura liya kya be..”maine kaha
“maine bahar se check karne ke liye nahi kaha.. nanga karke check kar…”us ladke
ne kaha..
“sun be, mujhe nahi pata ki tu kaun hai par jitna gandu tera chashma hai, utna hee
gandu tu hai… ye kya laga rakha hai…”
Tabhi mere paas khade Daddu ke aadmiyo me se ek ne ek mukka mere pet me

kinare, kidney ke paas mara….
“what the… ppfffff”
“Daddu saab ke bete se aise baat karega…”
“Dalle ka beta…”pet pakad kar khada hote hue maine kaha
“Madarbhagat.. abhi batata hoon.. … pakdo be ise…”
Daddu ne apne aadmiyo ko mujhe pakadne ke liye kaha jispar maine bag wahi
feka.. par wo toh main pahle hee fek chuka tha… isliye main turant peechhe muda
aur daudna chaha, lekin main daudne ki bajay ladkhadaya aur sar ke bal zameen
par gir pada… jiske baad Daddu ke aadmi mere upar kood pade, unhone mera hath
pair pakda aur pura nanga karke mere kapde wahi fek diye… mera muh par
unhone meri hee underwear thesi aur mere hath-pair baandhkar mujhe uthaya
aur zameen me fek diya… mere short se mobile nikalkar Daddu ke ladke ne table
par rakhe apne laptop se connect kiya aur thodi der baad apne baap se bola…
“Mobile trace ho raha hai…”
“Da..dd..Daddu, bhai… aapka ladka jhooth… jhooth bol raha hai… mobile trace
nahi ho raha…”
“chodna kisi aur ko sikhana… kamputer Engineer banaya hu use main…”
“.. tera mobile bewajah har do second ke baad bina kisi matlab ke beep mar raha
hai, light apne aap jal-bujh rahi hai.. upar se har minute error messege… koyi bhi
tera mobile thodi der ke liye dekhega toh samajh jayega… aisi nausikhiya kaam
Police nahi kar sakti… isliye agli bar yadi Police ke sath kaam kar raha ho toh,
Police ke according hee chalna… waise yadi tu Police ke sath chalta toh bhi pakda
jata…”
“tere Dalle baap ko marne ke baad main tere peechhe aaunga…”
“haha.. sach.. par mujhe dhoondhega kaise…”

362
“jaise tere baap ko dhoondha…”
“main madad karu…..? main apna name bata deta hoon.. zinda bacha toh mujhe
dhoondhne zaroor aana.. waise toh mera name Devdoot hai, par tu tere liye main
Yamdoot hoon… idhar aaj tu marega, udhar kuch din baad tera pura khandan…
par uske pahle ek sawal… Gautam kaha hai..? Gautam ka pata bata aur teri Maa ki
izzat nahi lootunga, sirf jaan se marunga… manzoor hai toh bata… warna..
rape+death ka combo offer bhi hai mere paas…”
Mere yadi is waqt hath-pair khula hote toh main Daddu ke ladke ko tab tak marta
rahta, jab tak ki wo mar nahi jata… zinda chaba jata… maine koshish bhi ki, rassi
se chhootne ki… lekin sirf chhatpata kar rah gaya… maine rassi ko todne ki dobara
koshish ki… neeche pade-pade farsh par apne hath ko ragadne laga… lekin … is
baar bhi sirf chhatpata kar rah gaya…. lekin Daddu ke ladke ko marne ke liye main
itna vyakul tha ki main farsh par lagatar apna hath ragadta raha… jab tak ki
unhone mujhe uthaya nahi…
Godam ke peechhe ek koyi dusara raasta tha shayad, jaha se wo mujhe bahar lekar
aaye… Godam ke peechhe teen gypsy thi, jisme se ek me unhone, mujhe peechhe
feka aur mere upar kayi sare bag lad diye… main yadi abhi normal hota toh zaroor
kuch na kuch karta lekin is waqt… na toh mera dimag kuch soch pa raha tha aur
na hee mera sharir kuch kar pa raha tha… unhone mujhe jaha feka tha… main
wahi bags ke neeche daba raha… mere sar ke stiches bhi khul gaye the… par phhir
thodi der baar mujhe ahsaas hua ki stiches nahi khule hai, balki stiches se skin ka
jo portion bandha hua tha wo shayad kisi dusari jagah se fat gaya tha… mujhe
Gypsy me peechhe jaha Daddu ke aadmiyo ne feka tha.. waha thik mere peeth ke
peechhe lohe ki ek sharp rod laga diya gaya tha… jo ki mere peeth me ghuste hee ja
raha tha… upar rakhe bags ki vazah se main zara sa bhi hil nahi pa raha tha ki
aage khisak kar us rod ko apni peeth me ghusne na doon… par yaha bhi main
nakamyab raha… aur phhir gadi start hi aur chalne lagi…
“wo bhi hai kya andar…”kisi aurat ki aawaz mere kaano me padi…
“haan… bhar liya usko bhi. Sala Daddu ke sath game khel raha tha… ek baar apne
purane adde par pahuch jaun, phhir sale ka ek-ek ang kaat ke alag kar dunga…
Chutiya samajh rakha hai Daddu ko…”
“chutiya toh tu ban hee gaya tha… kitni baar tune iske peechhe apne aadmi
chhode, lekin ye har baar unko chakma dekar nikal gaya… wo toh jis din mujhe
chodne mere kothe me aaya tha, us din pata nahi ise achanak se kya hua aur
seedhe kothe ke bahar hee auto me baith gaya… warna baki din toh paidal hee
bahut door tak jata tha… game toh tera ho gaya tha… par tujhe ispar shaq kaise
hua ki ye police walo ke sath mila hua hai”
“shaq…? Kal ispar nazar rakh rahe mere launde ne bataya ki iske ghar force aayi
thi.. aur aaj ye ekdum se police ke lafde se nikal kar mujhse deal karne aa gaya…
itni jaldi toh main police ke lafde se nahi nikal pata, phhir ye kaise nikal gaya…
pahle ye hospital me tha, phhir thane pahucha… phhir us harami Bairangi key
aha.. phhir headquater… tabhich mujhe laga ki zaroor ye police ka kutta banker
mujhe kaatne aayega.. aur mera shaq sahi nikla… maine Devdoot ko bulaya,
Colony ke Seceretary se iska naam maloom kiya aur Devdoot ne iski puri janam-
kundali mere hath me de di… pahli baar aisa hua hai, mere toh rongte hee khade ho
363
gaye the.. pahli baar zindagi me itna dar laga… bhaidchod.. madarchod bahut
dimag lagata hai… iska land kaat ke iske hath me na diya toh mera naam Daddu
nahi… maiyya chod dunga iski… pura khandan khatm kar dunga is behan ke
lawde ka… iski ghar ki aaurat rakhail ban kar nanga ghoomegi tere kothe me…”
“rakhail nahi banwana… iski maa-bahan ka wahi haal hoga, jo Madhulika aur
uske baap ka hua…”
“haahaha… maza aayega madarchod… jab iska lund kaat ke iski maa ke….”
Daddu iske aage kuch bolta uske pahle hee wahi pade-pade maine kuch aur sochna
chalu kar diya… main Esha ke baare me sochne laga… theory of machine subject ke
numericals ke baare me sochane laga… basketball ke national certificate ko
imagine karne laga ki kaise bhosdiwalo ne certificate me mera name- Arman ki
jagah Armaan likh diya tha… main khud ke reasoning sawal banane laga aur khud
unhe solve bhi karne laga… taaki mere kaano me Daddu ki wo aawaz na aaye, jo
main nahi sun-na chahta… aur ant me main apne dimag ki banayi us duniya me ja
pahucha, jaha main apne pairo par khada tha, jaha mere sharir me koyi zakhm
nahi the… jaha na toh mere hath-pair bandhe hue the aur na hee meri peeth me rod
ghusa hua tha… jaha hostel ke bahar jung lagi bench aaj bhi waisi hee rakhi hui
thi, jo mere college ke samay me rakhi rahti thi… par aaj yaha koyi nahi tha. na
toh Esha aur na hee Arun aur na hee baki hostel ke launde… shayad main khud
nahi chahta tha ki waha… aaj, is waqt koyi rahe… main kisi ko nahi dekhna chahta
tha… main kisi se is baare me koyi baat nahi karna chahta tha… isliye aaj waha
koyi nahi tha. main hostel ke apne room me khada hokar chup-chap bas deewaro
ko dekhe ja raha tha… aur tabhi mere kapde achanak se gayab ho gaye… dheere-
dheere mere sharir me wo zakhm wapas ubharne lage jo ki vaastav me the… mere
room ki deewaro ka aakar chhota hone laga aur khidki mere dekhte hee dekhte
steering wheel ka roop dharan karne lagi, wo pura room ek pal me gypsy me badal
chuka tha aur tabhi kisi ne peechhe se mera baal pakda aur baal pakad kar
ghaseet-te hue gypsy se neeche gira diya…
.
Uske aisa karte hee main samajh gaya ki mujhe yaha nahi aana chahiye tha…
mujhe police par bharosa nahi karna chahiye tha, yadi main apne pahle hee plan
par chalta jo ki thoda heroic tha, toh shayad main bach bhi jata, isiliye toh VR ke
flat par raat-o-raat jump marne ki practice ki thi… ki mauke par yaha se escape
kar jaun… zaroor Police me hee koyi Daddu ka kutta raha hoga.. khair, ab kya fark
padta hai.
Par tabhi mujhe Daddu ke launde ka wo sawal yaad aaya jo usne mujhse Godam
me puchha tha…ki… Gautam kaha hai ?.. mujhe kya maloom ki wo kaha hai… last
time jab use dekha tha toh wo aur Esha Parking me mera mazak uda rahe the..
"sun be Gautam, tujhe teri girl friend ne bataya hai ki nahi mujhe nahi maloom par
ek shandar, jaandar aur dhamakedar dushman hone ke karan mera farz banta hai
ki main tujhe bata du ki farewell ke din.. yani farewell ki raat, maine Esha ko kiss
kiya tha.... wo bhi bahut der tak. yakin na aaye to puchh liyo... tum dono yaha
aaye the mujhe ullu sabit karne...par ullu sabit khud ho gaye, isliye ab ek kaam aur
karna ki ullu ki tarah aaj raat bhar jagna. waise bhi ab jo maine bolne wala
hoon,use sunkar tujhe aaj raat neend toh waise bhi nahi aayegi aur wo ye hai ki…
364
farewell wale din… yani raat, Esha ne mujhe sex karne ke liye kaha tha... wo bhi ek
baar nahi balki teen-char bar, wo to meri hee niyat achchhi thi,warna.... anyway,
kya fark padta hai. chalo jao be, tum bhi kya yaad rakhoge ki kis mahan vyakti se
pala pada tha.... par yaad rakhna, main itni aasani se nahi jaane dunga tum dono
ko… main iska second part banaunga… jab tum log meri tarah sochkar itna sab
kuch kar sakte ho toh phhir socho ki… main kya karunga…”
Ye un dono se meri aakhiri mulaqat thi aur phhir main thik akela waise hee college
se nikla ,jaise college me aaya tha.....
Uske baad toh main kabhi un dono se mila bhi nahi.. phhir Devdoot mujhse kyun
puchh raha tha. matlab mujhe ye toh pata hai ki Daddu aur Devdoot ka Gautam se
kya relation hai, par Gautam ke baare me mujhse puchhna… aakhir wo hai
kaha…?
Gypsy se ghaseet kar Mujhe Daddu ke aadmi ek bade se jarjar ghar me le gaye..
aur waha ek pipe me mere dono hath chain se baandhkar chain ko pipe me ek parat
lappet kar dono chain ko uske do aadmiyo ne pakad liya…. maine behosh hone ki
jordar acting ki.. matlab Oscar Winning acting… lekin jab Daddu ne mere kaan ke
paas katta rakhkar chalaya toh main jhijhak kar turant uth gaya, jis par Daddu
has pada…
“mujhe chutiya bana raha hai bhadve… Police toh us aakhiri Godam ke paas hee
rah gayi aur tera mobile bhi usi godam me hai… police toh abhi yahi soch rahi hogi
ki tu ab bhi wahi hai aur mujhse deal kar raha hai.. mere bete Devdoot ne aisa
karne ke liye kaha… Kampoter engineer hai wo… BREC me”
“maine wo college reject kiya tha.. waise, achchha hua jo college ka name bata
diya… ab use dhoondh kar marne me jyada aasani hogi”bolkar maine muskurane
ki koshish ki lekin uske pahle hee…
"teri mahtari ka lund… Madarchod…”ek laat seedhe mere pet me markar Daddu
bola…
jiske baad kayi chize ek sath hui… jaise meri aankh se bhayankar aansu nikle,
khoon ki ulti hui aur main aankh band karke wahi ghutno ke bal gir pada aur
khasne laga… tabhi Daddu ke aadmiyo ne jinhone mera hath chain se baandhkar
chain ko pakad rakha tha… wo chain ko kheechne lage… shuru me main chain ko
kaskar pakde rakha.. lekin thodi hee der me chain mere hath se chhoot gayi aur
phhir mujhe aisa laga ki mere hath, mere kandhe se ukhad jayenge.. main bahut
jor se chillaya, wapas chain ko apni kalayi aur hatheli me lapet kar neeche ki taraf
kheechne laga… lekin Daddu ke aadmiyo ne is bar itni jor se chain kheecha ki jung
lagi wo chain meri hatheli aur kalayi ko kayi jagah se fad kar mere hath se chhoot
gayi aur un dono me se ek ne mere peeth me wahi ek laat mara, jaha gypsy me rod
ghusa tha… main phhir se chillaya.
.
“ye toh kuch bhi nahi hai… abhi toh main tere pure sharir ki chamdi nikalunga, tab
pata chalega tujhe… par uske pahle bol ki teri maa randi hai aur tu Madarchod
hai…”
“bol ki teri maa randi hai, mujhse chudwati hai aur tu madarchod hai…”

365
“bolega, madarchod… ya gand pakde, latke rahega…”

.
Maine kuch nahi kaha aur aankh band karke saans lene laga.. par main thik se
saans bhi nahi le pa raha tha.. mere kuch na bolne par Daddu mere peechhe aaya
aur meri peeth me jaha rod ghusi thi waha apni ungali ghusane laga aur jaise hee
Daddu ne ye kiya, main cheekhne laga.. mujhe aisa laga ki… aisa laga ki.. matlab…
mera ang-ang kaanpne laga. main khasne laga.. apna muh kholkar muh se saans
lene laga… mano mere sharir se meri jaan nikal rahi hai…
“bol ki tu madarchod hai…”apni ungali ghumate hue Daddu ne kaha…
“haan, lawda… hoon main, Madarchod…. Tum sabki ko maa ko chodta hoon…”
“ab pata hai main kya karunga… main teri photo kheechunga aur tere baap ko
send karunga… mere bete ne pata lagaya hai ki tere maa-baap ne tujhe tyag diya
hai… par ab dekhna ye hoga ki kya wo teri aisi photo dekhkar wapas India
aayenge aur jab wo wapas aa jayenge toh unke sath bhi yahi hoga… pahle main
tere bhai ko latkaunga. Kyunki tere bhai ko apne aankho ke saamne aise marta
dekh tera maa-baap mujhse bheekh magenge. Mera pair pakad kar tere bhai ko
chhodne ke liye kahenge… tere bhai ko marne ke baad tere baap ko aur phhir teri
maa ko… hahahaha… arey main toh bhool gaya ki teri toh bhabhi bhi hai na… use
nahi latkaunga… uske sath toh… maine photo dekhi hai teri bhabhi ki… ekdum
tanaka maal hai. uske sath wahi hoga, jo Madhulika ke sath hua tha… maza aa
jayega… bhaidchod…”ye bolkar Daddu saamne aaya aur ek laat phhir se seedhe
mere pet me mara….
Ab bas Daddu ke is tarah ke ek aur hamle ki zaroorat thi, jiske baad mera kaam
tamam ho jata aur main chah bhi raha tha ki wo mujhe aise hee jam ke ek aur laat
mere pet mare… jiske baad main sure tha ki meri aankhe bahar aa jayegi… pet fat
jayega aur khoon ki dhada-dhad ultiya marta hua main role se mar jaunga… waise
bhi yadi kahi se koyi chamatkar hua aur main bach bhi gaya toh… mera pura
sharir is haalat me tha ki baad me mere zakhm hee mujhe maar dalenge…
.
Ab mujhe muh se bhi saans lene me dikkat ho rahi thi… main ek baar me pura
saans na lekar rook-rook kar le raha tha aur mere har ek saans me mera pura
sharir kanp jata… saans chhodta toh, muh se khoon nikalta. Daddu ke last kick par
maine uske upar khoon ki ulti ki thi, jise saaf karne ke liye wo, mujhe aur meri
family ko gali dete hue… waha se chala gaya aur ab mere saamne Ajmeri aayi…
“maza aaya….”mera mazak banate hue Ajmeri puchhi…
“bahut…”
maine kaha… par shayad usne suna nahi.. ya phhir maine kaha hee nahi… ya
phhir mann me kaha… don’t know exactly..
“kyun re harami, police walo ki gand se gand takra kar Daddu ki gand marne
chala tha tu, mar gayi na teri… ab mar… mera moot peekar… tere marne ke baad
tere sharir par ganga-jal nahi mera moot chhidka jayega aur teri body aisi gayab
hogi ki police yahi sochegi ki tu unhe chutiya banakar kahi bhag chuka hai… aise
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kya dekh raha hai, mujhe… tu kahi ye toh nahi soch raha hai ki hum kaise
bachenge….? Tune hee toh Daddu ko laakho rupaye diye hai… kuch mahine ke liye
gayab ho jayenge kahi…”bolkar Ajmeri thoda peechhe khiski aur apne purse se
chhota sa aaina nikal kar apna chehra dekhte hue boli “bhosda dekhega… aakhiri
baar…”
Ajmeri ke thoda peechhe khisakne ke baad Daddu ka ladka samne aaya aur
muskurate hue bola
“khel toh tune sahi khela, par ye bhool gaya ki khiladi hum bhi hai…
overconfidence is such a bad thing… anyway good performance , you won our
hearts… kidney… liver and dick. Kill him”
“no one… can… defeat… me”
“we just did…”
“hear here… dickhead. I’ll cut my dick and eat it, if I ever get my ass kicked by you,
even though I’m a vegetarian. no one can defeat me unless I allow them ”maine
gala fadkar kaha.. par shayad un logo ne suna nahi ya phhir unhe samajh me nahi
aaya ya phhir maine mann me khud se kaha… ya phhir kaha hee nahi…
Maine Ajmeri ko dekha aur phhir meri nazar Ajmeri ke kandhe par tange us purse
par padi, jis-se usne thodi der pahle aaina nikal kar mujhe bhosda dikhane ki baat
kahi thi… aaina dekhne ke baad Ajmeri ne apne purse se lipstick nikali aur lipstick
lagane ke baad dono hontho ko jodkar lipstick ko uniformly and equally apne
hontho pe failane lagi. Lekin main dave ke sath kah sakta tha ki khoon me bheegne
se mere honth Ajmeri ke honth se jyada laal rahe honge. thanks to hemoglobin
protein.
Maine pahle Ajmeri ko dekha, phhir uske lipstick ko aur phhir uske kariya colour
ke purse ko. Ajmeri ko dekh ab main hasne laga… matlab hasne ki koshish karne
laga… jiske karan mujhe back to back hichkiya aane lagi, jisme mere muh se khoon
bhi nikla. mujhe aisa karte dekh Ajmeri meri taraf badhi aur tabhi Ajmeri ne jis
aaine ko pakad rakha tha, wo achanak se phoot gaya aur Ajmeri neeche zameen
par gir gayi… uske gardan me achanak kuch ghusa tha, jiske karan uske gardan
me chhed ho gaya tha aur us chhed se khoon nikal raha tha…
.
Kya maine Ajmeri ke purse me tracker chhipane ke baare me bataya…? Nahi….?
abhi bata deta hoon…
toh hua actually ye tha ki jis din main Ajmeri ko chodne uske kothe par gaya tha
toh uske bistar ke sirhane par uska purse rakha hua tha jise kholkar maine dekha
tha….. kyunki main pahle bhi kayi baar Ajmeri ko uske purse ke sath dekh chuka
tha, isliye mujhe purse ke color, design ka pura andaza tha aur usi rang me tracker
ko rangkar maine tracker uske purse me bahar neeche ki taraf chipka diya tha… jo
maine Police ko bhi bataya tha aur yahi wo dusara tracker tha, jiske baare me
Godam me aane se pahle baat kar raha tha… jiske baad Daddu ke aadmiyo ne meri
wo halat ki… ki main iske bare me bhool hee gaya.
.
Toh Ajmeri ke seedhe gardan me bullet ghusi aur wo wahi turant neeche zameen
me lot gayi… jiske baad waha bahut bhayankar firing hui… kisi ke bheje me goli
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ghus rahi thi toh kisi pet me… police wale dhadha-dhadh goli mare pade the… par
main Daddu ko goli lagne ka intezaar kar raha tha… jo ek deewar ke peechhe
dubka baitha tha… isi beech Daddu ka launda neeche gira… jispar maine jyada
dhyan nahi diya. mere saamne Ajmeri apni taang pasar kar padi hui thi, uski
gardan khoon se sani hui thi… uski gardan se khoon nikalkar zameen me charo
taraf phail raha tha… par wo abhi puri tarah mari nahi thi. wo rook-rook kar kutto
ki tarah gigiyate hue saans le rahi thi aur uske har saans ke sath uske gardan me
jaha goli lagi thi, waha se khoon nikalta… maine apna imagination level high kiya
aur apna baya pair uthakar antim saans lete hui Ajmeri ke chut ke upar rakha aur
uski chut masalne laga aur kafi der tak masalta raha phhir pura dum lagakar uski
chut me kaskar ek laat mara
“Sali, chhinar… mujhe bhosda dikha rahi thi, ab mera lawda dekh…”
aur phhir apna pair aur upar lejakar uske muh me apna juta ragadne laga…“kyun
re randi… ab bol…”
Aur phhir jab Ajmeri koyi response dene ke bajay sirf gigiyate hue saans hee leti
rahi toh maine apna pair uske muh se neeche khiskaya aur uske doodh ko masalte
hue uske doodh ko bhi mara. main aisa kafi der tak karta raha aur udhar
background me police sabko pele padi thi… police, behanchod pata nahi kaha-kaha
se goli mare padi thi aur jab ek bullet mere baye hath me ghusi tab mujhe haqiqat
ka aabhas hua aur samajh aaya ki…. Mere hath-pair ab bhi chain se bandhe hue
hai aur jo kuch bhi maine abhi Ajmeri ke sath kiya, wo actually hua hee nahi.
Ajmeri toh kab ka mar chuki thi. Daddu ke kuch aadmiyo ne Police ki firing ka
jawab bhi diya aur kuch waha se bhagne ke chakkar me shikar ban gaye… Daddu
ka launda aur Ajmeri Bai ka banta dhar ho chuka hai… ye shayad Daddu ko pata
chal gaya tha isiliye Daddu Deewar ke peechhe shant baitha tha.
“even people like Daddu is better father than my own father…”
golibari ab bhi chalu thi aur Police ko meri jaan ki bilkul bhi parwah nahi thi..
kyunki golibari ke dauran ek bullet jaha mere hath me lagi toh dusari thik mere
baye ghutne me, jiske baad main khada bhi nahi rah paya aur na hee puri tarah
neeche zameen par gira. Meri situation is samay aisi thi jaise kisi dead body ko
chain se baandh diya gaya ho. jiske baad main samajh gaya ki ab mera bhi
number aa gaya hai… bas koyi kahi se aakar goggle laga de, taki kal news paper
me meri role wali photo aaye… actually, mujhe pahle hee khoon me sani apni photo
badhiya edit-vdit karke police walo ko de deni chahiye thi ki yadi main mar gaya
toh meri ye wali photo chhapna. Jise dekhkar phhir pure Nagpur me aurat-jaat ki
sari member meri photo dekhkar apni gaand me apna hath ghusa lengi…
aaaaaahhhhhh. Sala mutth marne ka mann kar raha hai… maine Ajmeri ki taraf
dekha, par wo toh tapak chuki thi…
“ die with smile not with tears… ”maine Ajmeri se kaha

.
.
Iske baad meri yaddasht mera sath chhodne lagi… log kahte hai ki… marne se
pahle aadmi ki zindagi ki tasveere uski aankho ke saamne nachti hai, use wo sab
kuch mahsoos hota hai jo usne apni puri zindagi me kiya… sare achchhe kaam,
sare bure kaam… jaise usne kisko-kisko sochkar mutth mara tha…. wo sare log jo
uski zindagi me ahmiyat rakhte hai… wo sab… sab use yaad aate hai..
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I mean, Really…? sach me aisa hota hai…? phhir mere sath aisa kyun nahi ho
raha… jabki meri atma mere sharir se nikal rahi hai… main ye feel aur describe
dono kar sakta hoon. Phhir mere sath aisa kyun nahi raha. Mujhe mere ateet ki
koyi tasveer kyun nahi dikh rahi… iski do hee vazah ho sakti hai… ya toh ye
kahawat galat hai ya phhir mera koyi ateet hee nahi hai…
Mujhe thik-thak kuch bhi yaad nahi par uske baad maine apne sharir se jaan
nikalne ke aalawa aur bhi kuch mahsoos kiya jisme mujhe ambulance me dala
gaya… mujhe kayi log dikhe, kayi prakar ki aawaze sunayi di… par na toh main un
aawazon ko pahchan paya aur na hee un logo ko… shayad maine unhe aaj se pahle
kabhi dekha hee nahi tha. Meri aankh kabhi band hoti toh kabhi achanak hee khul
jati… kabhi mujhe meri aankh band rahne par bhi sab kuch dikhta toh kabhi aankh
khuli rahne ke bawzood bhi main kuch nahi dekh pa raha tha aur aise waqt me
koyi ek bhi aisa nahi tha… jise main jaanta hoon. Ye meri hee galti hai…shayad.
Par ab kya fark padta hai…
“Die with smile, not with tears…”
“Attentionnnnn… exercise number 1…. One…”
“yes madarchod…”
“two…”
“yes madarchod…”
“three…”
“maa chuda madarchod….”

.
“Arman wo card game ka name kya tha. jo casino royale movie me james bond
khelta hai…”
“it’s no limit texas hold’em. I can teach you how to play it”
“you knowww…”
“bitch please, Los Vegas me paida hua hoon main. Jis umra me tum apni maa ke
god me baithkar doodh peete the na, us umra me main apne muh me ek side beedi
dabakar Los Vegas ke casino me raaj kiya karta tha.”
.
.
“tell me, why you did that… what did you want to prove…”
"sorry ?"
"i mean, whole Daddu, Ganga Jamuna kand... what did you want to prove..."

369
“I come and I conquer”

Chapter-33: To Exist...?
Mujhe laga ki mere sath Jo Abhi ho raha hai ya Abhi Jo ho raha hai… both are
same , use main feel and describe dono kar sakta hoon. Mujhe laga ki marte waqt
wo past, present ka combine hona mahaj purane logo ki dakiyanusi baate hai par
Ab Jo mere sath ho raha hai ya Jo Ab mere sath ho raha hai use main sirf feel kar
sakta tha, describe nahi…
.
and for that I want to tell you, I’m sorry. That was wrong of me. I hope you can
forgive me. beacuase now, From one way I am seeing nothing but from another
way I am seeing everything. I even know how shall I meet Angelina. It’s all…all
double dutch to me. I’m sorry for this… for my failure to describe my current
situation and scenario and for that I’d like to apologize again but I promise I’ll do it
next time.
“stop it now, you’ve described enough…”
“tu kaun hai be…”
“please don’t tell me, you cant recognize your own face… anyway I have to collect
more versions of you then I’ll combine them. I must be going. you’re in transition
phase… take it easy”
“what the hell that supposed to mean…”
“please, don’t act like normal persons…”
“I am a normal person…”
“no… you’re not”
“sun be… ek toh waise bhi samajh nahi aa raha ki main zinda hoon ya tapak gaya
hoon, upar se tu dimag me lund ghusa raha hai… chup-chap khisak le nahi toh
main tere gand bomb fod dunga”
“more flashbacks and flash-forwards are coming… take it easy…”
“take it easy ? abey madarchod… kyun dimag kharab kar raha hai bhai.. please ja
na….. nahi toh main teri dayi chod dunga”(yadi maal hui toh)
.
.
Aur thik mere jaise dikhne wale ke jaane ke baad mujhe phhir se dikhayi dena band
ho gaya aur………………
“papa ko mat batana please, Nikki bhaiya… warna jab ghar jaunga toh mera baap
mera khoon kar dega…”ek ladka lagbhag gidgidate hue kisi se bola…
Main aur Arun hamesha ki tarah college shuru hone ke pahle yani college khatam
hone ke baad Cigarette peene apni udhari wali dukan par pahuche hee the ki…
370
dekha ki mera…mera koyi junior, kisi se gidgida kar uske baap se kuch na batane
ki vinati kar raha tha… ye unka family matter tha, isliye maine ispar jyada dhyan
nahi diya aur dukan wale se bola…
“do Marlboro do…”
“paisa…”
“arey police ka launda khada hai mere bagal me… ekdum corrupt police… matlab
gand-fatat le ghus khata hai Arun ka baap… ye do Marlboro kya do sau Marlboro
ka paisa de dega…”
“lawde, baap se majak nahi…”
“bol de ki tera baap aaj tak paisa nahi khaya hai…”
“kya hai be… do cigarette ke liye sabke saamne mere baap ki bezzati kar raha hai…
main tere baap ki bezzati karu toh tujhe kaisa lagega…”
“kar de… infact main toh kahta hoon ki mere baap ke sath-sath meri maa ki bhi
bezzati kar de…”
“kash ki tera baap us din mutth mar liya hota… toh tera janam hee nahi
hota”dukan wale ko paisa dekar Arun ne kaha…
“mera janam nahi hua, mera avatar hua hai…”
Mere ye kahte hee dukan wala hasne laga aur mujhse puchha ki mujhe aur kya
chahiye….
“do beedi de…”
“beedi…? Maine toh tujhe beedi peete nahi dekha…”
“arey, wo raat me hostel ke kuch launde chhat pe ganja peete hai… main bhi abhi-
kabhar chala jata hoon.. madarchod pahle din toh ekdum gand hee fat gayi… salo
ne ekdum hari-hari patti todkar kuch ghanto sukhaya aur fir pila diya… tujhe pata
hai, first year me first year hostel ke peechhe first time jise jhadi samajh kar hum
dono waha mootne jaya karte the… waha darasal seniors ne ganja bokar rakha
hua tha… kisi ko batana mat… ab bhi ganja ugate hai hostel ke launde”
“isme beedi ka kya role…”
“dekh jaise kisi ladki ko chodne se pahle humlog lubricant use karte hai na… taki
mast, achchhe se chudayi ho… thik ganja me beedi ke tobacco ka bhi same role
hai… matlab samjh ja ki muh choot hai, chilam… lund hai aur beedi lubricant… got
it ? now give it…”
“please bhaiya… mat batana na papa ko… warna bapu danda daal dega pichhwade
me…”hostel ke gate ke paas phhir gidgidate hue bola…

371
“Arun ye dono kaun hai be… Cigarette lene gaye tab bhi waha the aur yaha hostel
ke gate ke paas”
“ek apne college me padhta hai, dusara uske gaanv se aaya hua uska muhbola
bada bhai hai… yaha uska muhbola bada bhai inspection pe aaya hai ki uska
muhbola chhota bhai padhai kar raha hai ya humari tarah……………… anyway, toh
uske muhbole bade bhai ne achanak uske room me entry mari toh room me daru ki
botal dekh li… upar se pandey hokar non-veg vagerah kha liya bas yahi baat ye
bahari launda bade Pandey ji ko batane wala hai…”
“tujhe kaise pata ye sab…”
“b-h-u…”
“humlog second year me hai kya…”
“what the…”
“yad aaya… ye toh Rajshri Pandey hai… mera fan. Sala maine imagination me isko
kitna kharab dikhaya tha par reality me toh….. us-se bhi jyada kharab dikhta hai”
“please Nikku bhaiya… mat batana na.. samjho toh sahi… yad karo bachpan me
aap jab nali me ball marte the toh main hee utha kar laya karta tha….”
“dekh Pandey.. tu kya karta hai, kaha marwata hai… in sabse mujhe koyi lena
dena nahi… tere papa ne mujhpar bahut bharosa karke yaha bheja hai.. unhe ek-ek
chiz ki exact detail chahiye… reality toh batani padti hai dost… phhiir chahe wo
tere paksha me ho ya vipaksha me…”
“arey bol dena na ki… badhiya se rah raha hai hai, padhai-likhayi kar raha hai…”
“par ye reality nah hai aur reality toh sabko batani hee padti hai”
“reality me toh teri maa bhi chudi hai… toh kya ye baat bhi sabko batayega… nahi
na. kyunki kuch realities ko bataya nahi chhipaya jata hai… baki main is baar
kuch nahi bolunga… par yadi apne gaanv jakar bade Pandey ji se sab kuch sach-
sach bata doge toh unka tujh par bharosha pakka ho jayega aur wo phhir se tujhe
kuch mahine baad yaha bhejenge.... tab main tujjhe pelunga”
“bade-chhote ka lihaj nahi hai kya… main apne district me student org. ka head
hoon… mujhse tu aisi baat kiya kaise….”mera gardan daboch kar Nikku..Nikki.. jo
bhi uska name tha usne kaha…
“upar dekh, hostel ke board ke neeche kya likha hai…”
“kkkkyaaa… likha….hai……. jo yaha akadta hai, wo mera pakadta hai- ARMAN”
“Arman main hee hoon aur student org., students ko manage karne ke liye hote
hai.. humlog jaanwar hai… jinko bas ek baar aawaz de do… iske baad wo ye bilkul
nahi dekhte ki saamne kaun hai aur galti kiski hai… marna hai toh bas marna hee
hai… yaha aisa hee hota aaya hai aur aage bhi aisa hoga.. bhool ke bhi next time
kisi bhi student organization ke chamcho ko mat lana aur yadi galti se bhi Rajshri
372
ki shikayat uske baap se ki na toh yaad rakhna next time teri maa ko tera baap
nahi main chodunga……………. yadi maal hui toh, nahi toh phhir Rajshri Pandey
hai hee aur mere college ke student org. ke members ke paas bilkul mat jana
kyunki un sabko main last year hee pel chuka hoon… so, two options…. Lie or Die…
choose wisely and act nicely…. chal nikal ab pranam karke..”
.
“ye tune achchha nahi kiya…”Nikku ke waha se jane ke baad hostel ke ek ladke ne
kaha…
“chal bhag be kanghichor…” jalti hui cigarette uske sar ke upar jhadkar maine
kaha…
“w..w..wo k.k.. koyi… mamooli ladka nah..nahi tha, jisko tu..tune chamkaya… wo
Director se shikayat ka…ka…”
“ye kaun hai be… hakla…”
“De..De..Deeeee…. Deepak Bhagat…”
“sala, Chetan Bhagat ka bhai lagta hai… hat saamne se, warna muh ke sath-sath
gand se bhi haklayega… tum jaise nagdo se toh Arman baat tak nahi karta”
Maine us hakle ko kinare kiya aur hostel me jaane laga ki tabhi Rajshri Pandey ne
mujhse kaha…
“Arman bhai… aaj se apun aapka shagird… aaj aap jo bolo aapke liye hazir hai…
ladki chahiye toh bolo abhi kothe pe chalte hai ya phhir daru… aaj hee 2000 aaye
hai mere account me…”
“I love daru more than girls…”
.
.
.
“Kya hai madarchod… 20 bf download kiya hoon… madarchod ek bhi aisa nahi hai
jo dobara dekhne layak ho… dobara kya ek baar bhi nahi dekha ja raha… wahi fati
bur.. wahi latke hue doodh… bf wale directors toh sale apne tv serials ke director se
bhi gaye gujre hai bhosdiwale…”
“kya hua Arman bhai…”
“kuch nahi.. par tu kaha se aa raha hai be… aaj toh Sunday hai…”
“arey ek ladki se milne gaya tha… left side wala pyar ho gaya lagta hai us-se…
chalo Arman bhai isi khushi me chhat par chalkar waha se guzarne wale local aur
global logo ko gali dete hai…”
“chal be, main aisi chhichhori harkat nahi karta…”
“gali mat dena… sirf maje lena… gali toh apan juniors se dilwa lenge…”

373
“tu khud junior hai…”

.
Main chhat par pahucha… toh dekha ki taqriban 15-20 ladke chhat pe is samay
the… mujhe pata toh tha ki yaha kya hota hai, par is chiz ka itna craze….? Upar se
beet-te waqt ke sath waha ladko ki sankhya bhi badh rahi thi aur thodi der baad
mobile me achi-achi hardcore bf search karte hue Arun bhi waha aa pahucha….
Darasal humne 20 bf ekdum jhat type ki download ki thi iska jitna dukh mujhe tha,
us-se kahi jyada dukh Arun ko tha… kyunki uski zindagi me bf ke aalawa tha bhi
kya…
“Choda le….”hostel ki boundary se sate road par bike me ja rahe ek couple ko dekh
kar Rajshri Pandey chillaya aur jaise hee us ladke ne bike roki Rajshri Pandey
phhir chillaya… “kyun re randi, mere se bhi chudwa le… kya bade-bade pond hai
tere… madarchod… apne baap ka number de, abhi tere baap ko phone lagata
hoon…”
“madarchodo… behan hai wo meri… tumhari maa ka…”zameen se patthar uthakar

us ladke ne hostel ki chhat ki taraf jor se feka… jise chiila-chot kar rahe juniors me
se ek ne catch kar liya aur bola.. “tu sale jhooth bol raha hai, wo teri behan nahi
hai pakka randi hai, uski gand dekhkar hee main samajh gaya tha… uski gand me
do-do lund chale jayenge”
Us ladke ke paas waha se jaane ke aalawa koyi aur option nahi tha, mujhse chup-
chap raha toh nahi ja raha tha, par maine phhir bhi kisi ko kuch nahi kaha…
kyunki main ye janta tha ki yahi launde bina sahi-galat soche bas hostel ke naam
se ladayi karne ko taiyar ho jate hai…
Iske baad waha aise hee gali-galouch ka programme chalta raha, waha se jo bhi
guzarta, bahut badtar aur bhayanak gali sunke jata… phhir wo bicycle par sawar
chhota bachcha ho ya phhir koyi budha… hostel ke launde kisi ke sath koyi bhed-
bhav nahi kar rahe the aur sabki maa-behan chod rahe the. jise dekhkar mujhe
bahut kuch karne ka mann karta par main kaise bhi karke khud pe control kiye
hue tha….
“abey oye… chocolate.. rook…”sadak par khelte-kudte ja rahe teen-bachcho k eek

group ko rok-kar ek junior ne kaha… “madarchod… bhag yaha se nahi toh teri
gand kaat dunga… bhag madarchod…”
“bachcha hai be…”mobile me bf search karte hue Arun ne kaha…
“arey koyi bachcha nahi hai Arun bhai… abhi konte me jakar mutth marega..
madarchodo, gaye nahi abhi tak… tum sabki mammi kaha bur fadwa rahi hai…
ghar jakar apni maa se kahna ki…. Maa, choot dikhao na… yad kar lo lawdo… ghar
jakar, apni maa se bolna ki…. Maa, choot dikhao na… ek baar bol ke batao toh kya
bologe ?”
“Maa… choot dikhao na…”
“chalo jao fir aur jo bola hai zaroor bolna warna tum teeno ki maa ki gand kaat
dalunga… hahaha… bhago madarchodo yaha se…”

374
“kya hai yar, fir se fati bur…”bf search karte hue Arun badbadaya… mujhe hostel
ke ladko ka ye ravaiya dekhkar phhir se nahi raha gaya, par maine khud ko phhir
se control kiya…
.
“oye, Pandey.. Oo dekh apna roj ka shikar…”
“roj ka shikar ? matlab…”maine pucha
“matlab ye roj apni biwi ke sath subah paas wali university me jata hai aur sham
ko isi time wapas aata hai, sabse jyada gali toh humse isi ne khayi hai… dekhna
sir, kaise iski gand fategi abhi…”bolkar us junior ne sadak par sath chal rahe ek
mard aur ek aurat ko aawaz di…
“kyun re taklu-lal… aaj kaha choda is kutiya ko aur ye kutiya hamesha apna
chehra kyun thak kar rakhti hai… kahi ise ye dar toh nahi ki hum log iske muh me
mutth mar denge… hahaha… sala aisi badi gand ko ek baar chhu bas loon toh 10-12
baar apne aap jhad jaun…”
“abey, wo dekh…”RP bola…
“kya…”
“abey uske baye pond ke paas uska payjama fata hai.. Sali ne chaddi tak nahi
pahni…. Chudne ka itna khumar… ki chaddi utarne me ek second bhi waste nahi
karna chahti… arey wo raand…. Kabhi hostel aa… sab mil kar itna chodenge ki
mar jayegi behan ki lawdi… aur marne ke baad tujhe wahi gaad denge jaha
humlog ganja ugate hai, is-se kya hai zameen upjau bani rahegi aur ganje ki kheti
mast hogi… main toh tere gand me mitti bhar ke ganje ka ek paudha teri gand me
bhi ugaunga….”
“abey takle.. teri ghar me koyi maa behan nahi hai kya… kabhi unko bhi le kar
aaya kar.. sala is kutiya ko hamesha le aata hai… aur sun, bina chaddi pahnaye
lana, kyunki bina chaddi ke sadak par chalte hue jab unka payjama unki pond ke
beech fas jayega toh hume imagination me aasani hogi… dekh RP kitna sahansheel
hai betichod… itne din se iski maa-behan ek kar rahe hai, par kuch bolta tak nahi”
“bolne ki baat toh door hai, wo toh hume dekhta tak nahi…”
“jo is-se kuch bulwa le, main pure char saal uski gulami karunga…”RP ne taav me
aakar kaha
“main bhi…”usi taav me dusare ne bhi kaha..
“main bhi…”
“main bhi…”
“main bhi…”
“main kya, humara pura batch uski gulami karega”

375
“tumhari maa ka… ab mujhse control nahi ho raha, bahut ho gaya… tum logo ka…
ab main bhi maje lunga… bahut der se khud ko sharif bana kar baitha hua
hoon”apni jagah se uthkarar main daudte hue parapet(reling) par chadha aur us
couple ko dekh kar bola…
“pani me bheegkar aaya hai, mahtarichod… zaroor aashiqi 2 dekh ke aaya

hoga…”iske baad maine apne pant ki zib kholi aur lund bahar nikal kar unhe
dikhate hue hilane laga… “idhar dekh re randi… babaji ko pranam karo, nariyal
fodo, agarbatti jalakar safed aashirwad prapt karo… ”
Lekin jab mere itna sab kuch karne ke bawzood un dono ne dekha tak nahi toh
maine unke aur paas aane ka intezaar kiya aur jab wo paas aaye toh maine
Parapet me hee khade hokar unki taraf mootna shuru kar diya..
“come on, Arman… You can be better…ok.. start.. 3..1…2.. bhadwa hai,
madarchod… abey yeeeee hai… ab pahchana ise, iski maa toh pichhale hafte police
raid me 20 aadmi se chudwate hue pakdayi thi… phhir raid se bachne ke liye thane
me iski maa ko pure police walo ne choda tha, lekin iski maa itni badi randi thi ki
police walo se hee paisa magne lagi… jiske bad police walo ne apne sage-
sambandhio ko bhi police station bulaya aur sabne iski maa ko tang utha-utha kar
choda… aur jo iske sath muh baandh kar ja rahi hai na, wo koyi aur nahi iski maa
hee hai… tabhi uski gand aise curve mar rahi hai… Sali kutiya… humse chudwa le…
20-30 de hee denge…”
“ruk bhosdike… meri maa ke bare me aisa bolta hai…”
“ab bhai teri maa randi hai toh isme meri kya galti… dalali toh tu hee kar raha hai.
le..ye le..” 5 ka sikka jeb se nikal kar fekte hue maine kaha… “apni bhosad maa ko
aaj raat ke liye bhej de… kal subah ek bhai tujhe gift karunga… tujhe pata hai tere
paida hone se pahle teri maa sadak me bheek magti thi aur log teri maa ko ek-ek
do-do rupaye ke badle me sadak ke kinare hee choda karte the… jise bhi chodna
hota wo jake teri bheekh magti maa ke katore me ek rupaye fekta aur fir wahi
gacha-gach teri maa ke sath shuru ho jata… yaha tak ki gali me ghoomne wale
aawara kutte bhi teri maa ko chodte the.. teri maa unkkalund aur mutth chat-tii
thi… ek baar toh aisa hua ki…”
Itti der me us aadmi ne neeche zameen se ek patthar uthaya aur mujhe nishana
banaya… uske patthar fekne se pahle main taiyar ho gaya ki.. jab wo mujhe
patthar marega toh main catch kar lunga lekin main isme asafal raha aur patthar
seedhe mere mathe me laga….
“bhag ke channel gate band kar…”apna sar sahlate hue maine kaha…
Wo aadmi meri gali sunkar kuch jyada hee gusse me aa gaya tha, usne pahle
mujhe patthar mara aur phhir khisiya kar bada sa patthar uthakar hostel ke gate
ki taraf dauda… lekin wo gate tak pahuchta us-se pahle hee channel gate band ho
chuka tha…
“kyaaa chahiye aapko…”achanak hui is bhag-daud se apne room me so raha

warden utha aur us-se chillakar pucha
376
“tum warden ho yaha ke…”us aadmi ne bhi chilla kar kaha…
“haaaaa… toh…”warden phhir chillaya “sala na raat me sone ko milta hai aur na
din me…”
“ek baat batao… yaha pagal log rahte hai kya..? madarchod din me jata hoon tab
bhi bakte hai aur sham ko wapas aate samay bhi bakte hai… pichhle ek mahine se
itna torture hua hoon ki raat me sapne me inki galiya sunayi deti hai…”
“college me complaint karo…”bolkar warden apne room me dubak gaya…

.
“kya hua, itna tension me kyu hai…”room me Saurabh ne mujhse puchha…
“main zinda hoon na…? kahi aisa toh nahi ki.. ye sab kkabhi hua hee na ho… tujhe
pata nahi par main story banana me mahir hoon… meri puri zindagi mere dimag
ki upaj toh nahi hai…. mujhe is waqt hospital me hona chahiye tha…” bolkar main
fb se Esha ki photo churane laga… “sala madarchod, Gautam… meri maal ke sath
bahut selfie le raha hai aajkal…”
“tum mujhe khoon do, main tumhe aazadi dunga…”room ke bahar bheed me Arun
chillaya
“hume aazadi nahi bf chahiye…”
“thik hai phhir.. tum mujhe net do, main tumhe bf dunga…”
Net aur bf ka len-den karke Arun andar aaya aur aate hee mujhse bola..
“wo sab tune fix kiya tha na…”
“kya.. wo sab.”
“wo us aadmi ko gali dene ka pura plan…”
“tujhe kaise pata chala..”
“jab Rajshri Pandey chhat me chillaya ki…. Main kya, mera pura batch us shaks ki
gulami karega jo us aadmi se kuch bulwa le… tabhich… tabhich… apun sab samajh
gaya. kitna gira hua insaan hai tu…”
“gire hue insano se aise hee kaam liya jata hai… ab main unke paas yadi prem se
jata aur bolta ki… bhaiyo, aaj ke baad meri jis-se bhi ladayi hogi, chahe wo hostel
ka senior hee kyun na ho.. tum log aankh band karke mera sath dena. … tujhe kya
lagta hai wo aise me sath dete..? nahi… Rajshri Pandey ko main pahle se jaanta
tha, baki us din hostel ke saamne uske muhbole bhai ko batti dena toh plan ka
hissa tha, RP ne mere kahne pe jaan-buchkar daru ki botal ko apne room se nahi
hataya aur us time chicken khane baitha, jis time uske gaanv se aane wali bus
highway pe rukti hai aur main us din isiliye Marlboro lene ke baad apne hostel na
jakar junior ke hostel me tujhe lekar gaya aur RP ko bachaya…. taki juniors soche
ki zaroorat padne par main unka bhi sath dunga….”

377
“tune Rajshri ke sath sab jugad jamaya… tujhe maloom tha ki wo aadmi apni biwi
ke sath roj university se aata hai aur tune use galiya di… taki log baad me tere
bolne par marne-maarne par utaru ho jaye… mast chutiya banaya bakiyo ko lekin
mujhe nahi…”room se jate hue Arun ne kaha…
“aur tu ab tak nahi samjha ki meri ragging ke dauran kayro ki tarah jab tu room
me chhipa tha toh uske baad bhi maine tujhe kuch kyun nahi kaha… tujhse dosti
kyun nahi todi… kyunki main do hafte me hee jaan gaya tha ki tu meri tarah sanki
hai… yadi main best toh tu second best… aura pun kabhi nahi chahega ki mere
jaisa hee koyi mere khilaf ho…”Arun ke jaane ke baad maine socha….
.
.
.
“ye Pandey aaj itna udas kyun hai…”cafeteria me maine Arun se puchha…
“jisko wo line mar raha tha, wo use dhokha dekar kisi aur se set ho gayi… lol...”
“teri maal Divya ne bhi toh tujhe dhokha diya.. lol”
“kam se kam meri abhi tak Divya single toh hai.. Esha toh tere saamne Gautam ke
sath ghoomte rahti hai.. dono ek car me aate hai, ek car me jaate hai aur isi dauran
beech raaste me car rok-kar kahi…………”
“rook kyun gaya, aage bol na… maza aa raha hai…”
“ajeeb chutiya insaan hai be.. tu..”
“actually, mujhe kal raat gyan ki prapti ho gayi… jaise Shri Gautam Buddha ji ko
hui thi na…waisich.. unko Bodhi briksha ke neeche gyan ki prapti hui thi aur
mujhe mere laptop ke saamne bf dekhte hue… mera ab in sansarik sukh-dukh se
koyi lena dena nahi hai… baki yadi koyi ladki khud aake chodne ke liye bolegi toh
main chod dunga, aisa bhi nahi hai”
“kisi ladki ke itne bure din nahi aaye..”
“bure din…? most eligible boyfriend hoon main is college ka… yaha itne sare ladke
hai… unme se tu beta, gin ke ek aise ladke ka name bata de… jo mere se jyada
handsome ho, jo goggle lagane ke baad mere jitna manohar, haseen, sudaul ho… jo
do-do cigarette ek sath muh me daba ke peeta ho… most eligible boyfriend hoon
main… ladkiya mere naam se mutth marti hai… mujhe dekh aur phhir khud ko
dekh… tujhe toh sharm se hee 20-30 bar ikatthe mar jana chahiye…”
“tu Esha ke liye meri kuch jyada bezzati nahi kar raha…”
“hat sala uska naam lekar uska naam ganda kar diya aur Esha ke liye sab kuch
jayaj hai… uske liye toh main teri kya.. teri maa ki bhi bezzati kar du”fb se Esha ki
churayi hui photo Arun ko dikhate hue maine kaha “ye dekh… kaha ye, kudrat ka
karishma aur kaha tu, kudrat ka shraap… tere se achchha toh tere peechhe khada
ye Chetan Bhagat ka bhai dikhta hai… aa be hakle… baith… ladki patane ki trick
deta hoon tujhe…”

378
Arun ke peechhe khade Deepak Bhagat ko maine apne paas bulaya, jo meri baat
bahut der se sun raha tha…. wo haklu saamne aaya aur mere bagal me baitha…
jiske thodi der baad pyar ke gam me doobe Rajshri Pandey ne bhi waha aasan
grahan kiya…
“ye sale, mechanical wale sab jhand hote hai… unke branch me toh ladki rahti
nahi… lawde dusaro ki maal me muh marte firte hai… madarchod, jis ladki ke
peeche main pada tha… wo mechanical branch ke first year ke ladke se set ho
gayi… yanii, apne se junior se… wo bhi ladki ne khud use propose mara…”
“madarchod, main bhi mechanical ka hoon…”Arun bola…
“arey main city walo ko bol raha tha…”iske baad Deepak Bhagat ke kandhe par
hath rakh kar RP bola “kyun be psycho... teri item ka kya haal hai… suna hai tera
room partner use chod raha hai…”
“i..i.. love.. s.s.sssss”
“isliye tere se nahi pati…”ek jhapad kheech ke use marte hue maine kaha.. “agar
teri jagah main rahta aur Arun ne meri item ko pataya hota toh main Arun ke muh
me moot deta… lekin tu toh sale dhang se moot bhi nahi payega…”
“wwww…. Wo… kyun”
“ kyunki… jis tarah main mahan.. mera lund mahan… usi tarah tu hakla… tera
lund hakla…. Matlab rook-rook kar mootega…”
“mera mazak mat..mat..mat udao… aaj mera mazak tum log uda rahe ho… kal
meri jagah tu ho sakta hai… frame of refrence… tujhe toh iska mat.mat. matlab bhi
nahi pppppppata hoga..”
“nahi pata…. tu hee bata de…”
“object change ho jate hai, isme…”
“bas..?”
“haan.. yahi frame of refrence hai…”
“madarchod…”uska baal pakad kar uska sar gol-gol ghoomate hue maine kaha
“library me padi ek jhat book se relativity topic ke andar 4-5 line frame of refrence
ke baare me padhkar mujhe gyan chod raha hai… tujhe toh ye bhi nahi maloom
hoga ki jo meaning toh bata raha hai, wo relativity ke terms me bhi loosely fit
baithega… actual me iska meaning kuch aur hai… isiliye teri maal tere se nahi
pati.. ab toh teri maal ko main chodunga aur hostel me nanga karke usko hunter se
mar-mar ke uski gand laal kar dunga…”
“Eeeeeessshaa ko main…”
“arey hat madarchod…”uska sar pakad kar table par marte hue main waha se utha
aur bahar jaane laga… jaha beech raaste me Gautam mujhe dikha…Actually maine
Bhagat ko mara hee isiliye tha, taaki Gautam ko dikha saku…
“dekh le be… tujhe bhi aise hee marunga.. isliye aukat me raha kar…”Gautam se
itna bolkar main cafeteria se bahar nikal gaya…..
.
.
.
“so tellllllll….. m…. Armaaaaaaan, why yooo diiiiiiid you ……. that…”
“did what…. Ek minute, aawaz saaf nahi aa rahi..”apne kaan me lagi hearing
machine/hearing aid ko set karte hue maine kaha…
“why did you do that…”mere saamne baithi ek doctor boli…

379
“ab maine kya kiya… aur ye item kaun hai..”apne kaan ki machine thik karne ke
baad maine charo taraf dekhkar khud se sawal kiya… “Sali randi toh nahi hai… ya
phhir meri fan hogi… bahut fan following hai meri lawda…. Pure universe me
mujhe jaante hai……. lag toh ye hospital raha hai… ye mere hath ko kya hua aur ye
mera pair… madarchod goli ghusi thi yaha aur mujhe sunne ke liye hearing aid
lena pad raha hai… ye flashback nahi flash-forward hai… yani future……”
“Tell me, Arman… tummhare sath tumhare ghar me kya hua, jab tum 8th Semester
ke baad ghar gaye toh…”
“ye randi hai kaun… jo Shri Arman se sawal kar rahi hai…”aas-paas mahol ka
jayja lete hue maine ek baar phhir khud se kaha “wo raha bahar wala gate… chal
bhag”
Main chair se uthkar sirf do-teen kadam darwaje ki taraf badha tha ki… ek-dum se
zameen par muh ke bal gira…
“Arman, tum bhag kyun rahe ho…”
“chup be chhinar… mujhe pata hai tu mera lund katne wali hai… aur mera lund kat
ke freezer me rakh legi aur jab bhi mann karega toh chusegi… randiyo ko main
shakal dekh ke pahchan jata hoon…”
.
.
.
“that girl you just saw.. was Angelina… a future event. Anyway do you remember
all these memories… except the last one, that will happen in future”
“sorry…”
“don’t tell me, you cant recognize your own face……….. again”
“no…”
“really…?”
“i mean I don’t remember these memories.. my mind got blank and these incidents
don’t ring the single bell in my brain…. How can these incidents completely slipped
my mind. it’s like someone’s adding new incidents in my past life… plot is same, but
these incidents… it feels fresh… not a single bit of these moments are striking my
mind… it feels live not highlight”
“don’t worry, once I’ll be done you will get new life…”
“what if I don’t want new life…”
“still you’ll get one.. you’re going to die, my friend… I’ve watched you, manipulated
you for years…”
“still you’ll get one.. you’re going to die very soon, my friend… I’ve watched you,
manipulated you…. for years… now There is no such way, there is no such plan by
which you can survive”
380
“bitch please, I survived 4 years of engineering…”
“bad time to crack a joke….”
“ok…enough. Let’s assume that somehow I believe this… okayyy… ok. you’re not
my hallucination but then… I have to believe in everything related to you... right ?”
“yes and that’s what I want.”
“then a while ago, I saw a moment… somehow, I was speaking to Angelina. that
means, I’m going to survive this………”
“what if I tell you that, that will happen in other dimension….? What I want to say
is Your whole life, your whole hallucinations, your whole story is combination of
alternate realities… when you’re hallucinating, you’re not actually hallucinating…
you just visualize incidents from the other dimensions... ”
“and how am I able to do that…?”muskurate hue maine puchha…
“because of me…. I’m the best version of you… or I should say, you’re just a
corrupted copy of mine in other dimension… you’re just a puppet but now I’m
gonna kill you… You've caused me a lot of harm, not anymore. Now tell me,
Arman… How do you save yourself, when you are about to kill yourself”
“ bahut hua. mujhe pata hai ki ye sab mere dimag ki banayi hui kahani hai… just
like a maze. Jisme main kho chuka hoon. Main zaroor is waqt coma me hoon aur
yaha se bahar nikalne ke liye mujhe ye khel khelna hee padega… mujhe apne
dimag ki is bhool-bhulaya se nikalna hee hoga.. sala kya mastermind aadmi hoon
main bhi… khud ko hee gandu bana raha hoon.“apne samne khade mere jaise hee
dikhne wale ko dekhkar maine socha aur jaise-jaise main ye sochta gaya wo
muskurata gaya…
“ye sala gay toh nahi hai… mera matlab kahi ye mera dimag toh nahi padh raha...
yadi aisa hua toh phhir main ise harane ka plan kaise banaunga…. ek rasta hai,
jis-se main ye check kar sakta hoon. abhi check karta hoon… sun be…. teri biwi ki
choot me tere bete ka lund…. teri maa ka bhosda itna bada hai ki teri maa ke
bhosde me tera baap apna pura sar dalkar chata karta tha… teri maa randi thi…
teri maa madarchod thi… teri maa shemale thi.. teri maa ke muh ki jagah choot
tha.. teri maa muh se moota karti thi aur tera baap ek sath teri aur teri maa ki
gand mara karta tha… tu apne baap ka gand chat-ta tha… gadchataue…. hat teri
maa ka bam bhosda”
“stop it… I know you don’t believe me… you never did… so now I’m gonna tell you
my story one more time… few years ago or many years ago… we were part of
Quantum Computing program through brain….”
“quantum computing through brain……? Hahaha.. and how were you gonna
perform that process you just called Quantum computing through brain… ? by
installing a software from playstore…? lol”

381
“by DMT… dimethyltriptamine. The Spirit Molecule… It produced naturally inside

of human brain during sleeping…”
“in pineal gland.. both in plants and animals…”maine achanak se kaha… ya phhir
clearly kahu toh apne aap mere muh se nikla…
“ye maine kaise kiya… mujhe toh ye bhi nahi maloom ki pineal gland hai kya…?”
“that’s why I admire you.. you’re the only version of mine, who defeated me… and I
still have to know that how you did that…”
“and when I defeated you…?”
“in future”
“so, you’re saying that I’m gonna survive these injuries or I did it already… I just
have to open the tunnels of my brain to go back”
“but on what prize… and the more important question is do you really want to go
back ? I don’t think so. I mean…. Why would you like to go to a world that you hate
since you have been born. I can give you the peace you always wanted. I can free
you from your miseries. Just allow me to kill you, peacefully or I’ll do it
forcefully…”
“ forcefully.. ? if you could kill me then you would have killed me… anyway
according to you I’ve beat you before… ”
“that’s why I’m manipulating your brain… I’m changing your memories. So do
whatever I speak, or else I will make your life so bad that after some time you will
not even recognize who you are.”
“You said that I have beat you earlier”
“In future….so I chose the time when I could beat you, I changed your whole life. I
changed People’s attitude towards you and the result of this is that today you are
losing your life and in the last moment of your life… you’re alone.”
“how did you change my whole life..”
“In our world, we have been experimenting on a secret project. some died, some
gone insane but I passed the experiment right”
“what was that experiment…”
“connect to parallel universe through brain by injecting extra DMT, the spirit
molecule in the brain”
“to perform quantum computing stunt….?”
“yes.. but then people in parallel universe started dying due to our program…”

382
“aukat se jata nahi bol raha tu… tu hai kaun… itna toh main samajh chuka hoon ki
ye sab kuch mere dimag me ho raha hai. 1.0 tu hai nahi… 2.0 aisa tha nahi aur 3.0
tu ho nahi sakta, kyunki wo main hoon… phhir meri shakl tujhse kaisi milti hai aur
ek baat batau…. ekdum jhat lag raha hai… ”
“you can call me 4.0, though I’m not… what will be your response, if I tell you
that… I’m 5 dimensional ”
“At first I’ll laugh at you and then punch you… anyway, continue… I’m enjoying
this”
“we’re never meant to kill our own versions in parallel dimension… but then
something bad happened and I started killing my own. i killed thousands of my
own kind, my own forms in other worlds…. but you beat me. I don’t know how…
but you beat me… you beat me so brutally that I feel like a 3-dimensional…
ordinary people…. And then I chose a time where I could kill you. the time is just a
dimension for us, we can go ahead in time….. even behind”
“so you’re saying that you’re from 5 dimension world and you traveled back in
time …. Just to kill me..? a 3-dimensional ordinary man… who cant even make a
tea…”
.
.
Note: next update raat me dene ka try marunga. thank you everyone.
“No, it's not like that. I'm not a murderer…. But at the same time, I can’t stop myself
from killng you. When the Quantum Computing program started, the first parallel
world I went to, the first man’s brain I was connected to was a murderer and He
was killed just hours after I joined him. I felt everything that the man did ... I felt
stress on my neck. I felt dying myself and then I died with him. We did not envisage
what would happen if we died before our return from Parallel world to our real
world. I died with that criminal at that time and it closed the channel to my world.
My consciousness was lost for some time and I was lost too and then when I sensed,
I was in another Parallel World. It goes like this. I die and then open my eyes in the
new Parallel World and in this sequence I found you.”
“it means I have to die so that you can live. Now…. I understand why I see such
terrible dreams and why, I do not sleep at night. You fucked my brain so bad that I
see the ghost of Aradhna and Despite having fadu memory I forget a lot of things…
such as my birthday party day but please clear one thing on whether I really had a
girl named Esha in my life or it is just my hallucination or imagination or lawda-
lahsun due to your so-called DMT aka the Spirit Molecule… please, tell me… what I
was, what was my life in reality. Do i really have a big brother ? I am very tired
now fighting all these things. Please answer me..”
“fuck you and take it easy…. You’re in transition phase.. soon you’ll reach the zero
point, from where.. I’ll take the charge. ”
“zero point….?”

383
“That point where past, present and future meet together. So Keep your fingers
crossed… bitch”
.
.
.
“Arman bhai…. Bhai… kaha kho gaye… arey wapas aao.. wo idhar hee aa rahi
hai..”
“Arman bhai…. Arey kya hua… utho… bhai… wo idhar hee aa rahi hai… aise samay
me dhokha mat do… mera moot nikal jayega..”
“sala phhir se past tense…”apna sar sahlate hue maine kaha…
“bach gaya… aaaahhhh… waise hua kya tha, achanak se aisa laga jaise khade-
khade mar gaye…”
“chup be… sala ek toh ye bhi nahi maloom ki tu kabhi haqiqat me tha bhi ya nahi…
main khamkha kyu tere liye ladta firu…”
“kar do na… parallel universe ki khatir…”
“tujhe kaise pata be… parallel universe ke bare me…”
“kal aap hee toh bol rahe the ki yadi humlog 3 dimension se aage badh jaye toh
bahut kuch kar sakte hai… tarah-tarah ki laundiya chod sakte hai, gori-gori choot
chat sakte hai… ladiyo ke muh me lawda de sakte hai”
“ye maine kaha… wo bhi kal…?”
“haan…”
“lagta hai zero point door nahi… madarchod, usne sach kaha tha ki main, khud ko
kaise bachaunga… jab main khud hee khud ko marne wala hoon…”
“aap phhir se kho gaye…”mujhe jor se hilate hue RP ne kaha…
“Woo…wo.. wo toh apun acting kar rela tha… ab performance toh dena mangta hai
na beedu… waise ekdum fad acting karta hoon na… sala ab samajh me aaya ki
main aksar aise beech me kisi se bhi baat karte-karte kyun kho jata tha”
“bilkul…. Ekdum mast acting karte ho. bhagwan aapka bada kare.. par aapke
performance ke chakkar me meri gand fat ke chauraha ho gayi thi….”
“la pani de… fir teri maal se bhidta hoon..”Rajshri ke bag se pani ka botal nikal kar
peete hue maine socha “madarchod sabkuch ekdum itne saye-saye se ho raha hai
ki… sala kuch palle hee nahi pad raha… upar se ye ladki…”
“chakhna..? kaha hai be”
“chakhna.? Pani pee rahe ho, daru nahi….”
“toh kya pani.. bina chakhne ke peete hai…?”

384
“aur nahi toh kya….”us ladki ko apni taraf aata dekh paseene se tar-batar hote hue
RP ne jawab diya…
“acha hua, bata diya… mujhe toh maloom hee nahi tha… anyway… hiiiiiii”Rajshri
ko dhokha dene wali item ko maine hath dikhaya aur pani peene laga…
.
Rajshri ek samay ek ladki ke peechhe kafi pagal tha par wo ladki RP ko lawda
dikhakar kisi aur ka lawda apni pond me le rahi thi… mujhe bura toh laga par
phhir bhi maine bura nahi mana… reason…wahi… anyway, jab wo ladki kisi
dusare se set ho gayi toh Rajshri ke kahne par maine uske boyfriend ko pel diya tha
matlab do-teen jhapad mar diya tha. jyada isliye nahi maar paya kyunki wo ek
hosteler tha.
“is-se bolo ki ye yaha se chala jaye… main tumse akele me baat karna chahti
hoon… Raj…”
“Raj…… hahaha… iski maa ka…” pani peete hue mujhe itni jor ki hasi aayi ki mera
pani peene ka balance bigda aur jitna pani mere muh se lekar gardan ke beech tha,
wo sab mere achanak hasne cum khasne ke karan us ladki ke chehre, gardan aur
doodh me ja gira…
“sorry.”khaste hue maine kaha… “tumne isko Raj kaha toh achanak se hasi aa
gayi… really sorry. You continue…”
Sorry bolkar Main wapas pani peene laga… wo mujhe thodi der tak ghoorti rahi,
phhir mann me gali di aur wapas RP se baat karne lagi…
“Raj… ye tumne thik nahi kiya….”
Usne ek bar phhir se Pandey ko Raj kaha hee tha ki.... maine phhir se uske muh me
thook diya…
“Aaaaaaa, kutte tu aisi harqat kyun kar raha hai… teri behan ke sath koyi aisa
kare toh… laj-sharam sab dhokar pee gaya hai kya….”
“tujhse toh jyada hee laj-sharam hai mere andar… do-do lawda choot me ek sath
lene wali, sari duniya se chudwate ghoom rahi hai aur mujhe naseehat de rahi
hai…”
“toh bhadwe tera kya ja raha hai… meri choice hai ye…”gala fad kar wo boli… jis-
se waha aas-paas mauzood sabhi log parking ki taraf dekhne lage.
“ye choice-voice kuch nahi suddh randi-pana hai. suna hai ki tu 25 me deti hai…
sach hai kya…? matlab tera 25 kaun deta hai… main toh free me na loon”
“tu samajhta kya khud ko… tere bare me sach hee bolte hai sab ki tu ek number
ka….”
“bitch please.. first raise your level, then raise your voice… now get lost. Aur gali
mat dena, warna main jis level ki gali aajkal dene laga hoon na… wo sunkar tere
385
dimag ki nashe fat jayegi… matlab itni intense gali deta hoon. Isliye ja, apne
boyfriend ko bol ki wo aisa samjhe ki uske baap ne use laundiyabazi karne ki saza
di hai aur phhir aaram se ghumo… mera aashirwad tumhare sath hai. sada
suhagan raho aur yadi bhag kar shadi karna ho toh batana… victim main ban
jaunga…”
“victim nahi Arman bhai… witness…”
“haa wahi… witness aur tu sun ladki, 25 me mat diya kara… chillar ki problem hoti
hogi ladko ko. 30 me ya 20 me diya kar… Chal RP. chal..chalkar ek dusare ki
gand me ungali karte hai… yahi bacha hai zindagi me. ab…”
.
Main parking se hostel ki taraf muda par puri tarah mud nahi paya.... mere aas
paas mauzood har chiiz mere charo oor teji se ghoomne lagi… itni teji se ki mujhe
kuch nahi dikh raha tha… ye aisa hee tha, jaise bachpan me hum log aankh band
karke hath faila kar gol-gol ghooma karte the aur jab ghoomte-ghoomte gand fat
jati toh jaise rukne ke baad sar ghooma karta tha…. waisich mujhe abhi feel ho
raha tha. main kuch der wahi khada raha aur bardasht karta raha aur phhir jab
ye bardasht ke bahar ho gaya toh main apna sar pakad kar wahi baith gaya…
"Hiii... Did you have any victories you want to share”
Maine use dekha jisne abhi-abhi mera naam liya tha… phhir use dekhne ke baad
maine aas-paas ke mahol ko dekha aur phhir muskura diya… fir main past me
gaya aur uske sawal par gaur kiya…..
“sorry main samjha nahi… tum meri kaun si victory ke bare me puch rahi ho.. ab
kya hai ki mujh jaisa shoorveer jisne lakho jung jeeti hai, wo thoda confuse ho jata
hai…aise sawalo se”
“tum na... kabhi-kabhi... i was asking about your day... What was frustrating
about your day?” mand-mand muskurate hue Esha boli
“I don’t remember and I don’t care… anyway... it’s nice to see you. After so much
time I enjoyed seeing you…aisa lagta hai sadiya beet gaye.. tumhe thoda ajeeb
lagega.. thoda kya bahut ajeeb lagega.. par kya main tumhe thoda sa touch marke
confirm karu kya....”
"Zelja.. 4 ghante pahle humne sex kiya hai aur bol rahe ho ki tumse mile sadiya
beet gayi.."
"Hat pagli... mazak karne ki teri aadat abhi tak nahi gayi.. aise hee bol-bol ke meri
aisi taisi kar di tune... par mera dil bahut bada hai.. ja tujhe maaf kiya... "
"Zelja...?"thodi der chup rahne ke baad... ek-do saans lene ke baad Esha sirf itna
hee boli... Zelja..
.
Ye Zelja... kya hai behanchod... zaroor english ka koyi khati word hoga. Sala yadi
meaning puchh liya toh bezzati ho jayegi...

386
"Zeljaaaa..."abki baar Esha thoda aur teji ke sath boli... jiske jawab me maine bhi
kah diya... "Zelja.." .
Maine socha zaroor koyi phrase ya riwaz hoga... jisme jab samne wala Zelja bole
toh uske samne wale ko bhi Zelja bolna hota hoga...
"Zelzaaa..."wo fir boli
"Zelja..."maine bhi repeat kiya...
"Zelja... go.."
"Zelja... kaha go.."
"Zelja.. it's your turn... go"
"Zelja.. ok.."
.
Aur main apni seat se utha aur mere khade hote hee itne jor se log taaliya bajane
lage ki mujhe aisa laga jaise mere sare fans aaj yahi aa gaye hai... maine bhi hath
uthakar abhivadan kiya... maine pahle aise hee simple tarike se hath uthakar
abhivadan kiya aur phhir bagal me baithe ek aadmi ke jeb me rakha goggle
jabarjasti kheecha aur goggle pahankar logo ka abhivadan kiya... jis-se log aur jor
se taaliya bajane lage... jis se mere andar aur josh aa gaya aur main apni seat par
khade hokar logo ko flying kiss dene laga....
.
"Zeljaaa... Zeljaa...Zeljaaa..."wo sab chillaye.
"Zelja... Zelja.."main bhi chillaya...
jis par ab kuch log hasne lage the... Esha mera hath pakad kar neeche kheechne
lagi... wo mujhe baithne ke liye bol rahi thi. Par ye kya... ye kaise ho sakta hai...
aisa toh door-door tak kabhi nahi hua aur Esha bol rahi thi ki maine uske sath 4
ghante pahle sex kiya... ? Par aisa toh kabhi nahi hua tha. Infact Maine toh use aaj
tak bikni tak me nahi dekha tha phhir sex toh bahut door ki baat hai.....
"toh kya main future me hoon..."maine apne aas-paas dekha...
Waha bhari bharkam bheed is waqt jama thi aur sab Zelja... Zelja chilla rahe the.
Maine khud ki shakl dekhne ke liye apne jeb se mobile nikalna chaha... par mere
jeb me mera mobile nahi tha... isliye maine jis-se thodi der pahle goggle chheena
tha usi ke saamne wale jeb me se uska mobile kheecha...
"Sorry man... thodi der me lautata hoon aur ye jhat type ke kya dhoti jaise kapde
pahan ke aaye ho tum sab log... mujhe dekh ke kuch seekho..."
.
Maine uske mobile me camera on kiya aur khud ko dekhne laga... usme meri photo
ke sath neeche Name... umra aur address bhi likha aa raha tha... main dikh toh
387
same raha tha... par mere baal thoda gandu type ke lambe-lambe the aur toh aur
maine bhi wahi dhoti type kapde pahan rakha tha... jo waha auro ne pahan rakha
tha. Meri shakl toh same thi par mere khayal se meri umra thodi jyada thi. Mere
bal bhi safed hone lage the... matlab main same hokar bhi same nahi tha... phhir
maine auditorium ko gaur se dekha... ye na toh mere college ka auditorium tha aur
na hee yaha anchoring ki practice chal rahi thi... ye toh koyi function tha... jise
main Esha ke sath attend kar raha tha....
.
Mujhe apni aankho pe yakin nahi hua... matlab ye toh ekdum out of syllabus nahi
balki out of world tha... maine socha ki ye mera vaham hoga... isliye maine phhir
se camera me khud ko dekha... nateeza wahi pahle wala hee tha. Jiske baad camera
ke neeche jo name, age likha aa raha tha maine waha dekha aur dekhta hee rah
gaya....
.
"Ye log Zelja...Zelja .. isliye nahi chilla rahe kyunki ye koyi riwaz ya phrase hai...
ye log... ye isliye chilla rahe hai kyunki ye mera name hai... mere khayal se main
future me nahi balki parallel world me hoon..."
Jaise hee mujhe ye maloom hua ki main shayad parallel dimension me hoon ...
main us auditorium se uthkar bahar bhaga. Par aisa karne wala main akela nahi
tha... mere peechhe aur bhi kuch log bhage. Pahle-pahal toh mujhe laga ki wo sab
mere die hard fans honge par baad me samajh aaya ki wo mere fans nahi balki
mere security ke liye the... unme se do ne mera hath pakda aur mujhe neeche le
jaane lage... Main shayad yaha bahut badi hasti tha... main jaha rahta tha wo
jagah bhi badi alishan thi... upar se duniya bhar ki security... sukh.. suvidha...
maine pel ke khana khaya.. mast daru piya aur phhir apne signature style me do
cigarette ek sath jalaya...
.
"Zelja..."mere kamre me ek aadmi aate hue bola "tumne ye thik nahi kiya Zelja..
tumne kaha tha ki bagiyo ko tum surrender karne ka mauka doge... par aaj jab
tum bina kuch bole auditorium se aise hee chale aaye toh Zokaro ka bagiyo ko
marne ka bill pass ho gaya... itihas tumhe tumhari is kayarta ke liye kabhi maaf
nahi karega"
"Gautam... tu... tu yaha kya kar raha hai aur tere gand me himmat kaise hui
mujhse baat karne ki... madarchod mujhse tu karke baat karta hai... rook
bhosdiwale... abhi teri maa chodta hoon..."
Main apni jagah se uth khada hua aur table me rakhe pens me se do pen uthakar
Gautm ke paas gaya... wo clueless nazar aa raha tha.
"Is b ko rokne ke liye humne tumhe kitna gold diya tha... tab toh kisi paltu kutte ki
tarah humari haan me haan milaya tha tumne... tumhari is harqat se tumhe
andaza bhi hai ki kitna collateral damage hoga... hazaro begunah log mare
jayenge... tum ye rok sakte the"
"I dont remember and i dont care..."

388
Mujhe maloom tha ki wo Gautam... wo Gautam nahi tha... jise main jaanta tha...
par phhir bhi maine apne dono hatho me ek-ek pen liya aur Gautam ke paas jakar
uske dono kano me ghusa diya....
.
"Zellll...jaaa..."neeche zameen par girte hue wo zor se chillaya...
.
.
.
"Abey gandmare... kya soch raha hai...chal... abey chal na... "mujhe kheechte hue
Arun ne kaha... "aise hee desh ki raksha karega... jaha dekho... wahi so jata hai...
uth.. chal desh ko teri zaroorat hai... teen goli chahiye mujhe tere seene me..."
" phhir se past tense... sigh... anyway... maine abhi-abhi Gautam ko jaan se maar
diya. Chal papa bol"
"90° pe clockwise direction me ghoom..."
"90° pe clockwise... roger that... ye toh Gautam hai..."
"Wo bhi Esha ke sath aur tu bol raha tha ki tune use maar diya..."
"Haan toh sach bol raha tha... maine use sach me mara.. par yaha nahi, kisi aur
duniya me... parallel dimension me..."
"Aur tu waha pahucha kaise..."
"Through brains... matlab not in physical way... matlab mind to mind shifting..."
" wo din door nahi jab tu logo ko patthar marega..."

.
"Hat madarchod... teri dayi ko chodu... sale kallu... teri behan ka bhosda... kanghi
wapas kar nahi toh teri behan Aradhna ka nanga naach hoga..."RP gusse se
chillaya...
"Betichod.. gali kyu de raha hai..."
"Burmari ke..."kaliya ka baal pakad kar kheechte hue RP bola... jiske jawab me
kallu bhi RP ka bal pakad kar kheechne laga....
"Arman... ye RP... kuch jyada udi me nahi rahta ? Ek kanghi ke peechhe uski behan
ko gali de raha hai..."
"Randi hai madarchod... gand dekha hai tune uska... itna bada hai... lagta hai apne
baap se chodwati hogi ghar me... "Jaha dono lad rahe the udhar jate hue maine
Arun se kaha...
"Senior hoon main tera... chhod mujhe..."

389
"Senior hai toh kya ukhad lega... teri maa ko aaj raat me sarso tel laga ke
chodunga..."
"Chhod... "RP ko kanghichor se alag karte hue maine kaha... RP toh alag ho gaya
lekin ab kallu jyada excite ho gaya tha aur jab maine aur Arun ne dono ko alag
kiya toh kallu ne RP ko phhir se pakad liya...
"Isiliye teri maa mar gayi madarchod... pure gaanv walo ne milke choda hoga...
randi thi sali... main bhi choda hoon teri maa ko..."RP ki gardan dabate hue Kallu
bola...
Kallu kanghichor ne jaise hee ye kaha meri aur Arun ki fat ke char ho gayi aur
mujhe thoda-thoda ye abhas hua ki un logo ko kaisa lagta hoga... jab main unhe
gali deta hoon... khair iske baad jyada kuch khas nahi hua... bas humne kallu
kanghichor ke kapde fade aur nanga karke pure hostel me dauda-dauda kar
mara... jiske baad RP ke sath main aur Arun ground ki taraf ghoomne nikal gaye...
"Kyun be Pandey... aaj bahut gusse me tha..."
"Arey sala... india semifinal me Australia se haar gayi... madarchod pura mood off
ho gaya. Phhir Socha ki taiyar-vaiyar hokar ground me ladkiyo ko tadunga toh
kuch dard kam ho jayega... lekin kanghi hee nahi mili... Arman bhai... india jab
aise bade match harti hai toh gand hee fat jati hai bc... pura mood hee off ho jata
hai..."
"Pahle se hee imagine kar liya kar ki india haregi... aankh band karke wo scene
dekha kar jisme vipakshi team khushiya manate hue nazar aati hai... isse fayda ye
hoga ki yadi india phhir haar bhi gayi toh tu bur nahi manega kyunki wo toh tune
pahle hee soch ke rakha hua tha aur yadi jeet gayi toh phhir balle-balle..."
"Ye kaam karta hai..?"
"It works.... worked for me. Depends on your imagination power... "
"Kaise..."
"Toss hone ke bad maine apni aankhe band ki.. highlight mode me Australia se pel
ke run banwaye aur phhir highlight mode me india walo se jhat type se khilwaya
aur 150 me all out karwa diya... phhir main india ke harne se dukhi bhi hua.. pura
mood off ho gaya tha... jiske baad jab maine apni aankh kholi toh main india ki har
ke liye taiyar tha."
"Matlab us chiz ka gam pahle hee mana lena... jo abhi hua hee nahi hai aur sure bhi
nahi hai ki aisa hee hoga..."
"Thats the silver lining of being a pessimistic... ek nirashavadi sirf bura nahi
sochta... wo us bure situation se ladne ki himmat bhi jutata hai aur ye sirf match ke
results se nahi balki puri life se ladne me kaam aata hai. Ab jaise main pahle se hee
maan chuka hoon ki Esha mere se nahi pategi... engineering ke baad meri life
jhand ho jayegi... isliye ab mere sath kuch bhi ho...mujhe jyada fark nahi padega...

390
main uske gam me padne ki bajay main kya kar sakta hoon ispar bina ek bhi
second gawaye kaam kar sakta hoon..."
"ye sahi nahi hai... kisi ko bhi aisa nahi sochna chahiye."Arun ne kaha...
"Sometimes people dont need hopes... they need tricks to overcome their loss and
grief... i'm not telling you to follow it... i'm just giving you another option to deal
with your problems"
"Maa chudaye... main toh Arman bhai ko follow karunga..."RP chillaya " abhi sala
room me jakar imagine karke aata hoon ki Kohli ipl me jhat type se khelega... "
.
RP ke jaane ke baad main aur Arun wahi ground ke 400 meter ke track me paidal
chalne lage... un dino main aur Arun duniyabhar ki idhar udhar ki baate karte hue
kayi ghante tak kayi kilometer chal dete the... reason wahi... hum dono har jagah
hamesha bahut bore hote the. Ab toh college ki ladkiyo ke bare me bhi baat karne
me hume kuch khas maza nahi aata tha. Is boriyat se bachne ke liye TV series ek
option toh tha par apne college ke bache kuche din laptop ke saamne gujarne ka
mera koyi irada nahi tha... upar se future ki tension alag.... Arun ko.
"Finally... final semester bhi khatam hone wala hai... kya karega aage... kuch
socha hai"
"Yahi toh dikkat hai mere sath... main har chiz ke liye itna sochta hoon... itne
tikdam khelta hoon. Plans banata hoon lekin jab mere future ki baat aati hai toh
mujhe kuch samajh hee nahi aata... maine kabhi socha hee nahi ki mujhe zindagi
me kya karna hai... mera koyi aim nahi hai... koyi goal nahi hai... main kuch bhi
nahi banna chahta par shayad ab main samajh gaya hoon ki aisa kyun hai...
mujhe shayad pahle se hee maloom tha ki main college ke baad jyada din tak zinda
nahi rahunga. Isiliye maine apne liye kabhi koyi lakshya nirdharit nahi kiya tha...
kyunki jab mujhe jeena hee do din tha toh main do mahine ki planning karke
mehnat kyun karta..."
"Matlab..?. tu suicide toh nahi karne wala na.. yadi karega toh apne naam ki
jaydad pahle mere naam kar dena... please..."
"Wo toh main kar dunga... par pahle ye bata ki saamne ground me tujhe wo
disturbance dikh raha hai kya..."
"Disturbance ?"
"Basketball track tedha-medha ho raha hai kya..."
"Nahi..."
"Have you ever heard of that wormhole in brain which shifts you in another world
created within brain..."
"Hat bc"
"Chal phhir... bye..."

391
Aur main ek baar phhir se yahi tha... apne hostel ke saamne. Us jung lagi bench ke
saamne jo aaj bhi wahi thi jaha mere college ke dino me hua karti thi.
"Wapas reality me jaane ke liye bas yaha se nikalne ki zaroorat hai... jiske baad
Nisha ke pure khandan ko pelunga... bahut khushi mana rahe honge madarchod
log... next target: David... i'm coming bitches... be scared... be very scared"
Chapter-34: To Exist...? 2
Jiske baad main ek baar phhir se yahi tha… apne dimag me, apni khud ki banayi
duniya me… jaha mauzood har ek shaks mere baare me sab kuch jaanta tha… jaha
mauzood har ek shaks mujhe samajhta tha. main waha se andar apne kamre me
aaya aur ek baar phhir se apne kamre ki khidki ke paas khada hokar hostel ke
bahar bench par mera intezaar karti hui Esha ko dekh raha tha… mere dimag me
ek baar phhir se pura Ganga-Jamuna kand ghoomne laga.. jaise main waha pahli
baar+ aakhiri baar kab gaya.. kyun gaya... kaise meri vazah se Daddu ne ek ladki
ko jaan se mara... kaise main thuka aur kaise meri vazah se Daddu thuka...
.
“KL… KL…”room ke darwaje par ek laat maarkar andar aate hue Arun bola(KL=
kya lawda)
"HL...."(hii lawda)
"ML..."(mast lawda)
“hat lawda…”peechhe mudkar maine kaha “gand fat gayi bhai… tujhe pata hai
kaise baandhkar pela mujhe..."
“ab lund se bada laad loge toh yahi na hoga… sabne mana kiya ki mat kar.. mat
kar… aukat me rah… lekin nahi… waise real me kafi difficult situations thi… ”
“God always put me in difficult situations because he knows I’ll handle it… ”
“solid…”
“so, this is the end of The Great Arman…”
“maybe… or maybe not. I know, what you know… and if you don’t know, how the
hell I’ll know..”
“fine…”maine like ka symbol bana kar Arun se kaha, jiska saaf matlab tha ki hum
dono ka mood is samay bahut kharab tha aur… aur jyada chutiyapa kisi ek ke liye
bhari pad sakta hai… isliye Arun ne ek cigarette sulgayi aur mere paas, mere bagal
me aakar chup-chap khada ho gaya….
Hum dono Esha ko dekh rahe the… par hum dono ki feelings me kafi antar tha…
par main Esha ko dekhkar kya feel kar raha hoon, wo Arun mere bagal me khada
hokar feel kar sakta tha… infact is samay mere hostel me mauzood har ladka apni
khidki ke paas khada hokar Esha ko dekh raha tha aur un sabke andar wahi

392
feelings daudne lagi thi jo mere andar daud rahi thi… is samay un sabke dil me
Esha ke liye beinteha mohabbat thi…
"Why you did it... what did you want to prove"
"I wanted to save the humanity"

.
Meri hamesha se ek ichchha thi ki Esha mere saamne rahe aur main use ghanto
dekhta rahu… bina palak jhapkaye, bina kuch kahe… bas aisich dekhta rahu aur
aaj meri wo wish itne saal baad puri ho rahi thi… aaj mere paas bharpoor samay
tha aur uske paas bhi. Na toh aaj use mujhse door le jaane wala Gautam tha aur na
hee Arun mujhe us-se door kar raha tha… ye mere liye perfect duniya thi… par kab
tak. Sawal toh ab bhi wahi hai ki… kya main zinda hoon ? Aur yadi haan toh kis
halat me ?
..
..
“hiiii….”Esha ke bagal me baith kar maine muskurate hue kaha…
“ajeeb hai… tum ab bhi muskura rahe ho…”
“khoobsurat ladkiyo ko dekhkar main apne aap muskurane lagta hoon.. ye default
feature hai mere andar... pahle bhi ye hota tha aur aaj bhi yahi hota hai…
daru,cigarette ke baad yahi meri khayal se ek aisi aadat hai jisne mera sath nahi
chhoda…. Love you”
“main tumhe pyar nahi karti… tum ye jaante ho aur na hee kabhi karungi… phhir
bhi….”
“kya fark padta hai…”
“ghoomne chale….”apna hath meri taraf badha kar Esha boli…
“kaha…”uska hath pakad kar maine pel ke dabaya… jis-se usne apna hath chhuda
liya….
“ye kya kar…”
“ye kaam mera hai… matlab pahle mujhe hath badhana chahiye, tumhe nahi…
isich liye…”
“aise hee tumne Shweta ka proposal reject kar diya tha… kyunki usne tumhe pahle
propose kiya tha…”
“according to me… Love is cross product, I mean… A x B ≠ B x A.isiliye direction

change nahi honi chahiye… friendship me aisa ho sakta hai kyunki wo dot product
hai… A.B = B.A”apna hath uski taraf badhakar maine kaha “ghoomne chale….”
Aur badle me Esha bhi mere hath ko jor se dabane lagi lekin jab maine koyi
reaction nahi diya toh wo apne dono hatho se mere hath ko dabane lagi.. par main
muskurata raha… aisa nahi hai ki mujhe dard nahi hua dard toh mujhe hua… par
main sah gaya…. aur finally haar mankar Esha hasne lagi….
393
“toh kaha chale….”khade hokar wo puchhi.. lekin maine koyi jawab nahi diya… wo
ek aur baar puchhi… lekin maine is baar bhi koyi jawab nahi diya….
“Armaaaan… kuch bolte kyun nahi…”
Jiska maine phhir se koyi jawab nahi diya… aur teen baar mere koyi jawab na
dene se Esha ko apni galti ka ahsaas hua aur wo wapas bench par baithi…. Jiske
baad main utha aur Esha se puchha…
“toh kaha chale…”
“maine suna tha ki first year ke ladke ragging se bachne ke liye ek khufiya raaste
se jungle-jhadi ke beech se college jaya karte the… kya ye sach hai…”
“hundred one percent… main khud gaya tha kayi din aur us saal ye aakhiri baar
hua tha kyunki next year jab Sidar college se gaya toh maine wo raasta band
karwa diya aur jo non-hosteler seniors first year ki ragging lete the un sabko
maine samjha diya ki aaj ke baad college me kahi bhi ragging nahi hogi… par ye
maine aane wale naye ladke-ladkiyo ke liye nahi kiya tha… mujhe toh bas un
seniors ko marne ka bahana chahiye tha, isliye main khud first year ke ladko ko
pahle unse bhidwata aur phhir unko fodta…”
“toh kya hua, tumhare iraade chahe jo bhi rahe ho… par college me ragging toh
band ho hee gayi thi… us samay tum mujhe bahut achchhe lagte the… par phhir
tumne Gautam ko hostel me……..”bolte hue Esha ruki…
Wo do tarike se ruki… bolte hue bhi aur chalte hue bhi… kamal hai, mujhe toh
hawa tak nahi laga ki hum chalte hue baat kar rahe the ya phhir baat karte hue
chal rahe the…. mujhe toh yahi laga tha ki main ab bhi hostel ke saamne bench ke
paas khada hoon….
“Gautam ko maine jaan-buchkar nahi mara tha… wo khud 15-20 ladko ko lekar
hostel me hostelers ko marne ghusa tha…. par usne ye nahi socha ki us hostel me
200 ladke the…”
“aur wo sab… mera matlab wo pure 200 ladke Gautam aur uske dost ko marne aa
gaye the…? kitne bewkoof the na wo sab… mera matlab un 200 me se 190 ko toh ye
bhi nahi pata raha hoga ki kis baat par ladayi ho rahi hai… lekin phhir bhi wo
kood pade…”
“mere.. tumhare... Gautam ke aane se pahle hee hostel me ek niyam banaya gaya
tha ki galti chahe kisi ki bhi ho… yadi hostel ka ladka ladayi me shamil hai toh sab
uska sath dene jayenge aur jo aisa nahi karega use phhir baad me milkar hostel ke
sabhi ladke marenge….”
“aur sabne maan liya…?”
“nahi… do-char ko us samay marna pada tha… jiske baad hostelers ki ladayi me
sab shamil hone lage…. Waise bhi meri gulami karne ki bahut logo ne shapath li
394
thi... ”ek kaantedar jhadi ko uthakar maine kaha… “iske andar ghuso… wo raasta
yahi se aage jata hai…”
“kya… yaha toh ghutno ke bal chalna padega… tum aage chalo… yadi main aage
chali toh tum kahi peechhe se…..”
Sunkar main muskuraya…. Shri Arman par shaq… par kar bhi kya sakte the..
main ghutno ke bal baitha aur dono hath zameen par rakhkar aage badhne laga
aur mere peechhe Esha….
“kafi sangharsh kiya tum logo ne… first year me”
“abhi aisa lag raha hai, us samay aise chalne me bahut maza aata tha… ek baar
maine aise hee mere aage chal rahe Arun ke pichhwade me kaskar ek laat maari thi
aur wo saamne wali jhadi me muh ke bal gira tha… Uska chehra us din dekhne
layak tha… yaha se right aur ye bahar…”khada hokar apne kapde jhadte hue
maine kaha…
“first year me humare kapde aise hee gande hote the, is karan hum logo ne kapde
dhone band kar diye the ki… kya fayda kapde dhone ka… gande toh waise bhi hone
hai aur college wale sochte the ki hostel ke ladke bahut gande, jaanwaro ki tarah
rahte hai…”
“ye peechhe wala darwaja hai… hai na…? workshop ke paas wala… yaha maine ek
baar Vibha mam ko kuch ladkiyo ke sath dekha tha… jo hostel se aane wale first
year ke ladko se bahut bura bartaav kar rahi thi… tumhe Vibha mam yaad toh hai
na… jo us samay final year me thi, jab hum first year me the…”
.
Vibha mam… Vibha…Vi+bha… Vibha… use kaise bhool sakta hoon main…. Wo jab
yaha se sab chhod-chhad ke ja rahi thi... tab usne mujhe railway station bulaya
tha... par main kabhi gaya nahi... jispar wo mujhe railway station se call karke
boli..
"Kya boli..."
"Unke last words the..... Fuck you, Arman"
"Not surprised... aur unke pahle shabd kya the..."
"Pahle shabd..... yaad karta hoon"
((“oye maa de ladlo… kaha bhage ja rahe ho idhar aao…”jin ladkiyo ko main thodi
der pahle swarg ki apsara samajh kar line marna chahta tha wo ab nark ki chudail
ban chuki thi… aur unme se ek Vibha thi…
“yes..yes mam…”paseene se tar-batar hokar maine kaha… jiske jawab me Vibha ne

mere muh me cigarette ghused di… maine peechhe mud kar Arun ko dekha, is
ummid me ki shayad usme thodi-bahut himmat hogi… par wo toh mujhse bhi jyada
dara hua tha… phattu, sala

395
“kyun be lawdo, kya socha tha ki peechhe se aaoge toh bach jaoge… dildo lagakar
gand marenge hum tumhari…. Chalo, jhuko..”))
“Armaaaan…”mujhe hilate hue Esha boli
“Vibha…. Wahi na, Sidar ki crush…. Got it… wahi jise Sidar full left side se pyar
karta tha par wo har saal fail hone wale Varun se set thi…. dekha jaye toh Sidar ki
story bhi kuch-kuch meri tarah thi… meri jagah Sidar bhai the, Tumhari jagah
Vibha aur Gautam ki jagah Varun… unhone Varun ko Varun ki class me hee
ghuskar mara tha… thik waise jaise maine Gautam ko mara tha…. us samay main
college me nahi tha par main aksar us ghatna ki kalpana kiya karta tha ki kaise
hua hoga wo sab…. jab Sidar bhai third year me the aur Varun final year me…
Sidar, final year ki class me chasma-vashma lagakar... gali-vali dete hue role se
gaya aur phhir pure final year ki claas ki saamne Varun ko jhapad-e-jhapad pela…
unko bhi Vibha nahi mili aur mujhe bhi… mera matlab story lagbhag-lagbhag
same hai bas mere case me pyar jyada tha, dushmani jyada thi, khoon jyada baha
aur anjaam kafi bura nikla….”
“toh tum muskura kyun rahe ho… tumhe toh udas hona chahiye…”
“maine kaha na ki, tumhe dekhkar ye apne aap hota hai… kafi practice kiya karta
tha hostel me main iski… ki... andar chale…? ”
“college ke andar… kaha…”
“wahi… apne lover point pe.”
“canteen…”
College ke peechhe wale gate se workshop se hote hue Civil, Electrical department
ko cross karke main aur Esha Mechanical Department me pahuche…. Aur apni
final year ki class ko dekhne laga… andar hod sir heat and mass transfer ki class le
rahe the… maine class ke andar nazar dali… toh mere kayi sare dost mujhe andar
dikhe aur phhir wo ladkiya jinki char saal tak maine khoob bajayi…
“I know all of them…”garv se maine kaha
"Then why none of them are with you now. I think you were the only one in the
whole college, who got nothing. no friends, no love… all you got is Vengence, anger,
frustration… why do you have so less”
“because I was the best…”
“that went right over my head…Do you mind explaining it again? ”
“I mean… I am the best that’s why I have the less…”canteen me Esha ke liye chair
kheechkar maine kaha..
“I got the better one…. you’re nothing that’s why you have nothing…”

396
“l got the best one…. I’m everything that’s why I have everything… look around
Esha…"
"This is not real... Arman, and not likely to happen"
"Not as far as i know but maybe in future... anyway, just think of what you want
and canteen wala will serve you…”
“do frootie… one doughnut….. wow.. Arman, ye kitni jaldi aa gaya order leke…
main jab kal Divya ke sath aayi thi toh itni jaldi mera order leke nahi aaya tha”
“you’re with The Originator…”Esha ke top ko kheechkar uske top se apna goggle
saaf karte hue maine order mara “one quarter, one packet cigarette and …. Kya…
aise kyun dekh rahi ho… nahi…? thik hai phhir… daru, cigarette cancel… ”kahkar
maine Esha ke muh se frootie chheeni aur peene laga….
“tumhari aankhe yaha pahle se jyada bhoori hai…. ”ek saans me pura frootie
gatakne ke baad maine kaha...qQ
“aur tum yaha pahle se jyada achchhe ho… funny, sensible, lovable….”
“funny.... sensible.... lovable..Was not I in college ? main college me bhi aisa tha…
par meri ragging ne sab kuch badal diya… us din mere andar jo nafrat paida hui,
wo kabhi khatam hee nahi hui… maine un sabse apna badla liya lekin meri nafrat
kam hone ke bajay badhti hee gayi aur itani jyada badh gayi ki isne mere andar ke
insaan ko hee khatam kar diya…. par kis liye aur kab tak… why I hate everyone…?
You never know what will happen to you and what you will become ”
“okay… Arman. Time to go…”
“tum aise nahi ja sakti..”
“sab kuch tumhara decided hai… tum kisi ek se bore na ho jao, isliye tumne apna
time divide karke rakha hua hai… kuch mere liye, kuch apne dosto ke liye aur
kuch…”
“aur kuch… ?”
“Gautam ke liye…. Bye…”
“par Gautam yaha, kaise aa sakta hai… yaha na toh Aradhna aa sakti hai aur Na
hee Gautam… phhir kaise…..Esha… Esha…”
"Take care, Arman... see you later, Alligator "

.
“teri item gayi be… ab kis-se baat kar raha hai….”kisi ne ek mukka bahut jor se
mere sar me mara….
“teri behan ka….............. Arun tu…”

397
“bhosdike… hod ki class me tha main… madarchod ne pura dimag choos liya…
paralyzed ho gaya tha main, ek class aur attend karta toh glucose chadhana
padta… sab teri vazah se hua… na tu Esha se itni der baad karta aur na hee hum
hod ki class me kaid hote… lawde ke baal, bahut bhayankar game khel raha hai tu..
jo itna bhayankar arrangement karke rakha hai khud ke liye aur Esha ke liye…. Na
toh lawda use tere gravity-energy ke combo ke karan koyi chhoo sakta hai aur na
hee jab wo tere sath ho toh tum dono ko koyi disturb kar sakta hai…. itna dimag
yadi padhayi me lagakar kuch ban gaya hota toh Esha ka baap Esha ke sath-sath
Esha ki maa ki bhi shadi tere sath kara deta…. Waise ye tune kiya kaise..."
“psychosics hai... tere samajh me nahi aayega..."
"Ye kya hai be.."
"Psychology+Physics "
"Toh tu ab apne words bhi banane laga..."
"Yaha main apni alag duniya bana le raha hoon aur tu words pe pada hai... khair,
tu ye bata ki... ye Gautam ka kya lafda hai… ”
“ Gautam ko toh tu khud yaha lane wala hai… aur shayad R.Aradhna ko bhi….
Exact kisi ko kuch nahi pata… ”
“main kyun launga us bhosdiwale ko… main toh chahta hoon ki Gautam, is college
me toh kya is universe me hee kahi na rahe…”
“tere bore hone ki aadat…. Aur kisliye. Tu humse jab bore ho jayega tab tu Gautam
ko bhi yaha entry de dega… waise bhi Gautam ke bina tera wazood nahi hai,
kyunki yadi wo nahi hota toh Esha is college me nahi aati… Esha college me nahi
aati, toh tu uske liye pagal nahi hota aur yadi tu uske liye pagal nahi hota toh tu
aaj waha hota jaha tujhe hona chahiye tha, na ki waha jaha tu aaj hai…”
“aur yaha Esha hai, isliye Gautam college me aayega…”
“correct… Arman ke bina Esha ka wazood ho sakta hai, lekin Esha ke bina Arman
ka nahi…. isliye Gautam yaha aayega aur ek baat jo main aaj puri tarah samjha
hoon ki kyun yaha koyi nahi mar sakta… tune ye isliye kiya taaki tu Gautam ko
marte dum tak maar sake par wo mare na… balki thik ho jaye aur phhir dusare din
tu use marte dum tak maar sake…. Par yadi iska ulta hua toh…? Yadi Gautam ne
kisi tarah hume hara diya aur tujhe rojana marte dum tak mara toh….”
“bitch please, I’m The Originator…”
“dekh le… baki Gautam ke dosto ka college me gang ban chuka hai…. wo bas
Gautam ke aane ka intezaar kar rahe hai… unka manna hai ki abhi unconscious
state me pada tera brain... jab highly unstable hoga matlab koyi control nahi
hoga... tab ek moment aisa aayega jab Gautam ko yaha la patkega.... baki chut-
chudan mujhe nahi pata... mujhe sirf do kaam aata hai.. marna aur chodna.. pahle
bhi yahi karta tha ab bhi yahi karunga... charo dishao me mutth marne wala
aadmi hoon main... record darj hai mere naam..."

398
"Arun... A-Run... Ambitious Run..."
"Arun... A-Run... Ambitious Run.. anyway... Gautam yaha kabhi nahi aayega….”
“main bhi yahi chahta hoon.. ab aur ladayi nahi. kafi achchha mahol hai college
ka. Par yadi wo yaha aaya toh tension mat lena main sare laundo ko taiyar kar
raha hoon…. Maa chod denge unki is baar…. Workshop ki Lathe machine me
katenge sabko… by the way.. i've a news which will ruin your life….”
“Mi aikat aahe...”
“Rajshri Pandey is here….”
“RP bhi aa gaya.... kaha hai…”Arun ke aage-peechhe, daye-baye… upar- neeche

dekh kar maine puchha…
“abey yaha nahi hai.… neeche kya dekh raha hai ab kya wo mere lawde se
niklega... hostel me hai….”
“wait….”
"Kahe ka wait..."
“aur Arman bhai…”peechhe se mujhe aawaz dekar Rajshri Pandey mere saamne
aaya aur apni trademark harqat karne laga…
Rajshri ne ek Rajshri Gutkhe ka pouch fada aur phhir Rajshri ke sath milne wale
tobacco ka pouch bhi fadne laga…
“kya bolte ho Arman bhai, aaj kha hee lo… Rajshri….”
“chal be… mera koyi level-vevel hai ki nahi.. jo main rajshri kha loon”
“Arun bhai… aap logo…”
“laa lawda, aaj try maar hee leta hoon…”
Itna sunte hee Rajshri Pandey ke andar itna josh aaya ki usne turant tobacco
Rajshri ke pouch ke andar dalkar tobacco ko supari ke sath milaya aur ek dose
apne muh me bharkar Arun ki taraf packet badha diya…
“lo, Arun bhai… peg maro…”
“tum log khate hee ho toh, Rajshri kyun khate ho… kuch level wali chiz khaya
karo..…”
“main explain karta hoon..”wahi ek ladki ke gaal par Rajshri thook kar RP bola…
“dekho Arman bhai… jis tarah har ore ...mineral hota hai, lekin har mineral... ore
nahi.. jis tarah har iphone ... mobile hota hai, lekin har mobile ....iphone nahi… thik
usi tarah har Rajshri .... gutkha hota hai, lekin har gutkha... rajshri nahi… Rajshri
ki baat hee alag hai, kyun Arun bhai…”

399
“aur nahi toh kya…”bagal wale table me, jiske gaal me RP ne abhi-abhi rajshri
thooka tha, usi ki glass me Arun ne rajshri thooka aur usi ladki ka dupatta
kheechkar apna muh pochhne laga….
Dupatta ladki ke kandhe par safety pin se fit tha aur Arun ke is tarah jhatka dekar
duatta kheechne se uski dress fat gayi aur wo ab Arun ko ghoor kar dekh rahi thi….
“ghoor kya rahi hai bahinchod… yahi pe patak ke chodunga… yakin na aaye toh
apne bagal wali se puchh.. 4-5 baar chhat par le jakar chod chuka hoon usko…
samajh nahi aa raha kya, lawdi tere ko….. ajeeb gand-mari hai, ghoorna band hee
nahi kar rahi… dekh… aakhiri baar bol raha hoon, ghoorna band kar… warna
mahtari chod dunga”
“chup be chutiye… jo mann me aaye bolta rahta hai… samajh kya rakha hai tune
college ki ladkiyo ko.. jis din hum apni pe aaye na toh nanga karke college me
ghumayenge aur aakhir me lund kaat denge…”
“Arun… hahaha..”Arun ki taraf dekhkar main aur RP hase…
“tu kya has raha hai…”Arun ne mujhse puchha
“tujhpe has raha hoon, dekha nahi kaise us ladki ne teri utari…”
“tujhe sach me lagta hai ki us ladki ne wo mujhe kaha… zara dhyan se dekh toh…”
“dhyan se dekh ka kya matlab… pahle tune uski udayi aur phhir usne teri…
simple…”cigarette muh me fasate hue maine us ladki ki taraf dekha… wo ladki
Arun ko nahi balki mujhe hee ghoor kar dekh rahi thi…. maine Rajshri Pandey ko
dekha , wo bhi mujhe hee dekh kar has raha tha…
“very good… ab cigarette ka filter dekh…”
Maine waisa hee kiya aur dekha ki cigarette me laal rang laga hua tha… phhir
mujhe ahsaas hua ki Rajshri main kha raha hoon, Arun nahi… aur jo thodi der
pahle hua wo maine kiya tha… maine us ladki ke gaal par Rajshri kha-kar peek
mari thi aur maine hee uska dupatta pakad-kar kheencha tha, jiske bad uske kapde
fat gaye the… us ladki ne mujhe hee reply diya tha aur mere hee lCund ko kaatne ki
dhamki di thi…
Maine pani ka jug uthaya aur us ladki ke muh par pani feka aur haste hue Arun ki
taraf dekha…
“nahi..... pagal hai kya be…. Ye gande kaam main nahi karta… main iska rape
bilkul nahi karunga…”
“really…”
“tera badla… tu hee lena…”
“badla main hee le raha hoon… RP idhar aa, baith ke maza lete hai…”

400
Jiske baad Arun apni jagah se utha aur us ladki ke kapde fadkar use canteen me ek
kinare le gaya… jiske baad mujhe us ladki ki cheekhe sunayi di… Maine kafi enjoy
kiya un cheekho ko… mera matlab ekdum mood hee fresh ho gaya… phhir jab wo
cheekhe shant hui toh main samajh gaya ki lund ghus chuka hai. Tab mujhe andar
se thoda bura laga ki ye maine Arun se kya karwa diya… khud toh paapi tha hee,
Arun ko bhi paapi bana diya. isi beech Rajshri Pandey ne rajshri ka ek au packet
fada…
“Arman, ye tune achchha nahi kiya… tune mujhe mazboor kiya, mere dimag ko
control kiya aur…. ye sab haqiqat me bhale hee na ho.. Arman….. par bhagwan
tujhe kabhi maaf nahi karega…”
“aur na hee main kabhi bhagwan ko maaf karunga… why the hell he created me.”
.
main apni jagah se utha, table ke neeche padi kulhadi uthayi aur jis ladki ko Arun
ne abhi konte me lejakr pela tha… uske baal pakad kar use ghaseet-te hue canteen
me sabke beech laya… phhir Arun aur RP ko mazboor kiya ki wo us ladki ke hath-
pair pakde… taaki us ladki ko jab main zinda kaatu, toh mujhe koyi problem na
ho….
“pel do, Arman bhai… ekich baar me kaam tamam hona chahiye…”
“hao…”
“ aap ruk kyun gaye… maro kutiya ko… aapse jubaan lada rahi thi.. arey phhir
rook gaye…? ”
"Arey pelo na... ruke kyun ho. Kaat dalo lawdi ko... aaj isko bhun kar khayenge..."
"Phhir rok gaye... soch kya rahe ho..."
“rook be thoda… goggle laga loon, kya pata koyi video bana raha ho whatsapp...
youtube me dalne ke liye…”
Maine goggle lagaya aur us ladki ke gardan par kulhadi se dheere-dheere kharoch
kar ek nishan banaya ki mujhe yahi pe marna hai aur nishan banane ke baad pura
dum lagakar us ladki ka gardan par kulhadi mara… mara toh maine pura dum
lagakar.. par us ladki ki gardan puri tarah kati nahi… meri kulhadi uske gardan ke
andar jakar phas gayi.. jiske baad na toh main kulhadi bahar nikal paa raha tha
aur na hee uski bachi-kuchi gardan kaat pa raha tha… main jab bhi kulhadi ko
thoda sa bhi idhar-udhar karta toh chhatpatate hue zameen me padi wo ladki aur
chhat-patane lagti… jise dekh kar hum teeno kafi enjoy kar rahe the… Rajshri ne
mere kahne par us ladki ki salwar utari aur phhir chaddi utar kar uski choot me
apni ungali andar-bahar karne laga…
“lagta hai, mar gayi Arman bhai… ek bhi maza nahi aa raha…”
“choot chat ke dekh toh…”

401
“yukkk... mari hui ladki ka choot kaun chatega....”
“arey kuch nahi hoga… chal chaat…”
“thik hai phhir….”majbooran us ladki ki choot chatne ke liye RP ne apna muh us

ladki ki choot ki taraf kiya…
Aur maine us ladki ke chehre par ek pair rakh-kar jhatka dete hue kulhadi uski
gardan se nikali… aur is beech, jab Rajshri Pandey uski choot chat raha tha, jab
Arun us ladki ki doodh daba raha tha… toh maine kulhadi hawa me uthayi aur
pura jor lagakar us ladki ke gardan par phhir se de mara……. Jis-se us ladki ki sar
uske dhadh se puri tarah alag ho gaya… maine us ladki ka sar uthaya aur table par
rakh kar Canteen me mauzood sabhi logo ki taraf dekh kar kaha…
“I can forgive you for my murder but not for my insult... I’m the most ruthless,
worthless and fearless creature you’ve ever met or you’ll ever meet. Even the devil
is a kid infront of me… got it…? Now get lost… you ugly people.. I hate you all…”
Us ladki ki gardan kaatne ke baad main Canteen se akele nikla aur Esha ki class ki
taraf jaane laga… bhale hee ye real me na hua ho.. par phhir bhi jo maine kiya tha..
jo bhi maine Arun aur RP se karwaya tha, usne mujhe sochne ke liye mazboor kar
diya tha... main kaun hoon aur kya banta jaa raha hoon. Kya iska koyi ant nahi..?
Aur yadi iska koyi ant nahi toh mujhe Ganga-jamuna kand ke baad zinda nahi
bachna chahiye.. kyunki is duniya me mere aur mere jaise logo ke liye koyi jagah
nahi... sawal ab bhi wahi hai ki... kab tak aur kis kimat par..?. jo log kahte hai.. jo
naitikta aur insaniyat ki badi-badi baate karte hai... wo toh mujhe kahi dikhti hee
nahi or i've lost my humanity and there is no hope to return....
Khair... main jaise hee canteen se nikalkar insaniyat ki taalash me Esha ke class ke
bahar pahucha... tabhi uski class chhoot gayi, jaise professor ko maloom tha ki
main kya chahta hoon aur usne class khatm kar di. Esha ki class se launde-
laundiya bahar aane lage, unme se kayiyo ne mujhse hath milaya, kayiyo ne door
se sirf hath dikhaya toh... kayiyo ne mujhe smile pass ki. Par kisi ne mujhe koyi
advice nahi di… koyi salah nahi, koyi saleekha nahi… koyi gyan nahi ki... maine ye
thik nahi kiya aur koyi gungaan nahi ki... maine kaise ek zinda ladki ko kaat
dala...
main Esha ke class ke bahar thodi door pe khada tha. Esha ke class ke kayi launde-
laundiyo ko main jaanta tha par unme se adhiktar aise the… jinhe main nahi
jaanta tha, infact main unhe aaj pahli baar dekh raha tha. ya phhir kahi dekha
hoga… par yaad nahi. thik usi tarah jis tarah sapne me kuch anjaan chehre
dikhayi dete hai. bas fark itna tha ki mere case me ye bulk me tha, yaha anjaan
chehre kuch jyada hee dikhayi de rahe the… main bhale hee un sabko nahi jaanta
tha, par unme se aisa koyi nahi tha… jo mujhe na jaanta ho. chahe wo reality me
mere college ke dino ki baat ho ya phhir yaha haqiqat me...I mean sapne me… upar
se maine thodi der pahle jo canteen me gardan kaatne ka stunt kiya tha, wo un
sabko mere through pata chal gaya hoga… isiliye, jinhe main jaanta tak nahi… wo
bhi mujhe salaam thok rahe the.

402
Kam shabdo me kahu toh ye mere liye perfect world tha. yaha kuch karibi logo ko
chhod diya jaye toh koyi mujhe saalah nahi deta, sab saalam thok ke jaate hai…
phhir chahe wo ladke ho ya ladki… yaha na toh Gautam tha aur na hee meri sabse
jyada gand fadne wali Aradhna… infact wo har jagah jaha Gautam aur Aradhna
na ho par Esha ho… wo jagah mere liye perfect hai, phhir chahe mujhe R.Divya ki
respect hee kyun na karna pade…
sabse jyada professors ki gand fati hui thi. kyunki college me toh phhir bhi meri
koyi limit thi… lekin yaha…………Kul milakar ye jagah mujhe kafi raas aa rahi thi
aur yadi yaha rahne ke liye mujhe marna bhi pade toh main khushi-khushi katta
apne mathe par rakh kar trigger daba dunga… par abhi main sure nahi hoon ki
marne ke baad main yaha hamesha ke liye rah paunga… jis din ye confirm hua, us
din E= mc2 formula ki kasam ki main suicide kar lunga… jisme 5th dimension wale
ki help lene padegi..
.
Yahi sab sochate hue Esha ki class ke bahar khada main Esha ka intezaar karta
raha… main pahle bhi aisa kiya karta tha, matlab college ke dino me bhi… par us
samay ye sab main chhip ke kiya karta tha aur pure chaar saal chhip-chhip ke kiya
lekin aaj…. Lekin aaj main khullam-khulla kar raha tha. thodi der baad Esha apne
class se bahar aayi.. par wo akeli nahi thi, uske sath R.Gautam ki behan R.Divya
bhi thi…
“jo tumne abhi kiya… wo hum sabne dekha. Wo thik nahi tha. tum yaha bhi waise
hee ho.. jaise college me hua karte the…. sniffy, egotistic, self-loving, self-conceited,
swollen-headed, vain and…. ”main jaise hee Esha ke paas pahucha wo boli…
cheekhte hue boli aur mujhe waha se jaane ke liye kaha…
“ I’m no more that crappy, arrogant, swollen-headed person I used to be… now I’m
awesome, astonishing, mind-blowing, charming, entertaining and thrilling… and if
people cant handle me, then they must die.. just like that girl died in canteen”
“allow my brother and he’ll tell you who must die… you chose us… okay. Fine...but
without my brother ? without any difficulty…? how coward you are.. Arman… you
knew.. you knew that if my brother was here... Esha wouldn’t even spit on your
face”mujhpar haste hue R.Divya boli…
"That's an interesting interpretation... do you mind walking me through your

logic?.. or, you've forgotten me completely... ?. I love the difficult things as well as
your baklol brother Gautam, You know…why…? because it gives me chance to
know myself…to know my abilities, my weakness… my cruelty… and soon you’ll
know it too. don’t worry”
“I’m not worried, you dickhead… we just saw what you do when you lose.. I mean
She just replied to your blashphemy and when you… you got nothing to support
yourself… you just cut her throat..? and your this act proved that… once a failure,
always a failure….”
“you’re right… I’m a failure, I know it very well. I know, My whole life was a
failure… is a failure but have you ever seen any sign of failure in my face ? .. the
answer is… NO and here I become The Invicible, The Inviteble. Randi Divya…. sorry

403
for my harsh words but I do the things which I like, which makes me happy and
trust me, I’ll do it forever”
“see… I was right, Arman… no matter how you show yourself.. at the end you will
end up as a bad person…”
“bad..?.. no… Version 1.0 was bad, 2.0 was worse but 3.0 is worst… yani ki main.
now one question…have you ever seen the use of three forms of adjectives in a
better way.”
“wo toh waqt batayega, jab mera bhai Gautam yaha aayega… college me gang
banna shuru ho chuka hai…”
“aur wo aayega kaise… mere bina toh wo aa hee nahi sakta…”
“yahi toh tumne Aradhna ke baare me bhi socha tha na.. par wo toh aa gayi. Maine
use aaj college me dekha.”
“Almost surely impossible…”
“mujhe bhi yahi lagta tha, par jab Aradhna ko aaj college me dekhi toh meri
ummid jaag gayi… jiski vazah shayad real world me tumhari behoshi ya maut ho
sakti hai… jaha tumhara tumhare dimag par koyi control nahi… jis tarah se
Aradhna aayi hai, usi tarah se Gautam bhi aa sakta hai…”
“thik hai… suppose ki Gautam aa gaya. phhir uske baad kya… i'm damn
Originator..., yaha toh wo mujhe chhoo bhi nahi sakta, lekin main….. Isliye uske
liye yahi behtar hoga ki wo yaha na aaye, warna roj uska sar, dhad se alag
karunga…”
“jaisa ki maine pahle hee kaha hai ki ab yaha zaroori nahi ki wahi ho… jo tum
sochoge… tumhara dimag hee tumhare khilaf ho jayega… thanx to your
counterpart 4.0.. who came from some 5 dimensional world.. ”
“ye kya tha…”aas-paas hone wali aawazo ko sunkar maine Divya se puchha… uske
agle hee pal mera dum ghutne laga… maine apna sar dono hatho se dabaya aur
jor-jor se saans lene ki koshish karne laga lekin main saans nahi le paya… balki..
jab maine saans lene ki koshish ki toh mujhe aisa laga jaise main pani ke andar
saans lene ki koshish kar raha hoon aur waisa hee affect bhi…
Par ye sirf mera vaham nahi tha… main sach me pani ke andar tha… jiska andaza
mujhe tab hua, jab maine apni aankh kholi. Main kisi taalab ya phhir nadi ke
andar tha… mujhe pata nahi ki ye achanak location change kaise hui par main is
waqt gahre pani me tha aur mera dum ghut raha tha… maine khud ko concentrate
kiya aur aankh band karke upar aane laga….
“iski...... maaa... ka…”pani se bahar aakar maine jab charo-taraf dekha toh bola
“sala..ye toh samundar hai… aur thik hostel se sata hua bhi… nahi, actually ye
pure college ke charo taraf hai… ye toh maine kabhi nahi socha tha. phhir kaise…?
404
kahi Divya sach toh nahi bol rahi thi ki mera, mere dimag me koyi control nahi
hai.. kahi Gautam sach me toh nahi aane wala…?”
Hairan-pareshan main Samundar se bahar nikal-kar kinare tak aaya aur kinare
par aakar let gaya… ye bhale hee maine na socha ho par tha ye gazab ka… matlab
maine ye kyu nahi socha… Samundar me bahta hua mera goggle bhi waves ke
through kinare tak aaya, jise maine pakda aur goggle lagakar wahi kinare me leta
raha…. Par main waha akela nahi tha. waha Esha bhi thi…. wo bhi bikni me. waise
toh maine Esha ke baare me kabhi us tarah se nahi socha… par abhi use dekhte hee
mera lund khada ho raha tha… wo wahi mere bagal me baithi aur muskurane
lagi…
“kahi isne mera khada hua lund toh nahi dekh liya… tabhi ye itna muskura rahi
hai...”
Aur Mera aisa sochna hee tha ki Esha ne mere underwear ki taraf dekha aur dekhte
hee ek baar phhir muskurayi…
“dhattt… main na hee ye sochta aur na hee use mere through pata chalta ki main
kya soch raha hoon aur na hee wo idhar dekhti…”
“koyi baat nahi, Arman… normal hai ye...”

Chapter-35: Breakdown
“normal…? Haan.. normal hee hai ye... thik usi tarah jaise tum logo ko periods aate
hai…”
“ok. That was unexpected... ye normal nahi hai.. mera matlab periods aana normal
hai, lekin use aise example dekar kahna… ye normal nahi hai.. tumhe nahi kahna
chahiye tha…”
“main toh bas explain kar raha tha…”
“anyway, tumhe swimming aati hai…”
“mujhe kya nahi aata…. Bhagwan se jyada talented hoon main…”
“ohkay… waise name kya hai is sea ka..”
“iska naaaaame… ............. Engineer’s Sea”
"You figured that out fast. That's really nice. DYNAMITE !..”
“See the Sea… Esha…”
“I’m”
“Don’t you think seas are great place to commit suicide...”
“dont know... "
"You should go now.. "Arun ko aata dekh maine kaha..

405
"see you later, alligator...”

.
"See you later, alligator... badhiya rhyming hai.. tu bhi bol diya kar... see you
soon, my moon... lol.."hatheli me gaanja malte Arun bola...“waise... maine suna ki
aaj Divya ne tujhe thik waisi hee dhamki di, jaise college ke dino me diya karti
thi…”
" Is duniya me aise bahut hee kam log hai.. jo mujhe dhamki nahi dete… par main
unko jyada seriously nahi leta kyunki… "
"Haan kyunki... tu galat ho sakta hoon lekin kamzor nahi.... like a monster…”
“ monster..? main monster nahi hoon... par pata hai monster kaun hai ? maine
unhe dekha hai. wo log pura valentine week celebrate karte hai. chocolate day me
chocolate dete hai, teddy bear day me teddy bear day dete hai, phhir last me hug
dete hai… mera matlab how foolish, gandul, immature they are… they are the real
monsters. Aise logo ko dekh ke rooh kaanp jati hai meri aur yahi vazah hai ki
aliens humse kabhi nahi milte… inhi burchatto ki vazah se… mera vash chale toh in
sabko nanga karke aapas me inka pond se pond ladwau…”
“abey wo toh bahana rahta hai… haqiqat me adhiktar log ye nahi karna chahte par
isi ke jariye unhe wo raasta milta hai, jaha wo apna lund dalna chahte hai. Par
hum dono iske liye nahi bane the... ya phhir tu bhi ye sab karta yadi Esha tujhe line
deti toh… par tu ye kar nahi paya… shayad isiliye jo ye kar rahe hai tu unhe
khunnas me bak raha hai…. tera Daru ne utna nuksaan nahi kiya jitna Esha ne
bina kuch kare kar diya… bahut bada chutiya nikla be tu, Arman… hum sochte the,
hum me se sabse pahle tu bada aadmi banega par ab toh tu aadmi ban-ne ke bhi
layak nahi bacha… par ab bhi waqt hai… mujhe allow kar, main tujhe Esha se
mukti dila dunga… just allow me to pass that gravity-energy barrier, you made
around her ”chilam me gaanja bharkar apna hath jhadte hue Arun bola...
“that will lead you to your extinction and by the way.. I’m addicted to her. now,
either I’ll get her or I’ll kill her… there isn't any third option.”
“first wala toh bhool ja… kyunki kuch chize zindagi me kabhi nahi badalti… upar se
wo aise logo ke beech rahti hai jo tujhse beinteha pyar karte hai, jaise Divya… wo
Sona…”
“Sona…… Sona…. S+ O+ Na… Sulphur… Oxygen… Sodium… Sona kaun be…”
“jab Aradhna ne suicide kiya tha yad hai…”
“wo toh main agle janam me bhi yad rakhunga….”
“toh phhir jab wo critical condition me hospital me admit thi… tab main, tu aur RP
Apollo hospital gaye the… yaad kar…”
“yaad hai…”
“waha phhir hospital ke bahar girls hostel ki ek laundi tujhe jhadne aayi thi… yaad
kar…”
406
“hostel ki laundi…. … rook ek minute… Sona… Sooooonaaaaaa…. Yani gold..”
((Arun ke karan main chup ho gaya.Sona humare paas aakar kuchh der tak apne
kamar me hath rakhkar mujhe ghoorti rahi aur main kabhi baye dekhta toh kabhi
daye... .maine kuchh der tak intezaar kiya ki wo mujhe ab gali degi...ab gali degi.
lekin jab wo mujhe kuchh bolne ke bajay sirf ghoorati rahi to main bola...
"Ab bolegi bhi... Bol na... jo bolna hai...."
"sharam aa rahi hai thodi ,bahut..."
"Thodi si..."
"disgusting....jab se Aradhna ke suicide ke bare me uske papa ko pata chala hai,

unhe hosh tak nahi...idhar Aradhna apni zindagi se lad rahi hai aur udhar uske
papa....kya bigada tha usne tera, jo use aisa karne par majboor kar diya.jab pyar
tha hee nahi ,tab kyun uske sath sambandh rakha tune....bloody hell...."
.
"idhar dekh idhar..."bolkar Sona ne dusari taraf dekh rahe mere chehre ko apne
hatho se pakad kar apni taraf kiya....
"teri maa ka lawda... madarchod... chodri... hath kaise lagaya be tune.. .jyada
kachar-kachar karegi toh yahi dhar ke kachar dunga... bol toh aise rahi hai jaise
maine khud ne chuhe marne wali dawa laakar use diya aur bola ho ki'le kha aur
mar ja'...khud to dus-dus lawde apne gand me lekar chalti hai aur mujhe yaha
aakar naseehat de rahi hai....bhool gayi lawdi... pichhale saal jab ek ladka tere
karan Yashwant se maar khaya tha. sali khud to kayi ladko ki zindagi barbaad kar
di aur yaha mujhe suna rahi hai... choddari kahi ki"
is beech Arun ne mera hath dabana jaari rakha taaki main chup ho jaun...
"hath chhod be tu...ise aaj goli de hee deta hoon, bahut shan-patti kar rahi hai
apun se....tune kya socha tha ki tu yaha aayegi aur mujhe chamka kar apne
saheliyo ke saamne deenge hakegi... ki... 'girls.. i just bashed Arman.. wow..
awwww... aahhh...aaahhhhhhhh '......wo aur ladke hote honge... jinpar tu hukumat
karti hogi...mujhse thoda door hee rahna...warna jab Police mere paas aayegi toh
tera naam le lunga aur kahunga ki... tune mujhe aisa karne ke liye kaha tha...ab
chal nikal lawda.. yaha se..."
"maine sahi suna tha tere baare me...tujhe ladkiyo se baat karne ki tameej nahi
hai..."
" tujhe bahut tameej hai ladko se baat karne ki....sali........chodri kahi ki."
"abhi chahe kitna bhi akad le ,ye sab karke tujhe raat me bahut tension hogi.tujhe
neend tak nahi aayegi...."
"Neend nahi aayegi toh kya hua.. tv series dekh lenge... lawda... tu chal ab.. pond
utha ke bhag."
407
"how dare you..."
"aa gayi na apni aaukat pe...char saal me english ka sirf ek line sikhi hai ... 'how
dare you'.... dum hai toh iske aage english me bol ke dikha...."
iske baad Sona kuchh nahi boli aur chup-chap udhar se jaane lagi....lekin main
phhir bhi chillate hue bola..
"apne kaan ke sath apna sab kuchh khol ke sun le...ye sar sirf tirange ke aage
jhukne ke liye bana hai...ladkiyo ke samane nahi aur tujh jaisi ladki ke samane to
bilkul bhi nahi...agli baar se kisi ladke ko kuchh bolne se pahle soch lena kyunki
har ladke tere boyfriends ki tarah jhandu nahi hote... kuchh jhande gadne wale bhi
hote hai... aur sun tera payjama baye pond ke paas fata hua hai.. hath laga le..
hahaha"
"Arman bhai... lodh.."
"That's lol not lodh... chutiye.."
"Iska full form..?"
"Lol means.... Lots of lund"))
“achchha wo Sona… use kaise bhool sakta hoon main… maine use na chodne ki
bajay Aradhna ko choda.. isliye wo bur maan gayi thi. mere khayal se Aradhna ki
jagah wo mere liye suicide karna chahti thi… par use wo mauka nahi mila… sahi
hai behanchod… isiliye Esha mujhse nahi pati kyunki chaubiso ghante toh wo
Randi Divya aur chodri Sona ke sath rahti thi… waise tujhe pata hai kya ki is
duniya ka sabse samajhdar insaan kaun hai…?”
Mere is sawal par Arun aise chup raha jaise usne kuch suna hee na ho ya phhir
maine kuch kaha hee na ho… par sach ye dono nahi tha. wo actually gaanje me
beedi patti mila raha tha….
"Arun... bata is duniya ka sabse samajhdar insan kaun hai..."
“kaha laga pada hai... lawda... lee machis maar…”mujhe machis dete hue Arun ne
kaha aur chilam muh me fasaya...
Maine machis jalaya aur Arun ne chilam… bhaka-bhak do shot kheechne ke baad
dhua mere muh me chhodte hue Arun bola…
“toh tu kuch samajhdar-vamajhdar insaan ki baat kar raha tha…”
“you know... who is the wisest man in this universe…”
“main aur kaun…”
“correct… but why…”

408
“tune ye sawal puchhte hue mera name socha isliye maine jawab de diya.. lekin
reason tune daba ke rakha hai… in short, mujhe kya pata lawda…”
“kyunki tu kabhi pyar me nahi pada… who don’t love are the wisest…”
“bhosdike… maine kabhi pyar nahi kiya lekin itna zaroor maloom hai ki pyar kiya
nahi jata, balki ho jata hai… isiliye... Esha nahi pati tujhse…”
“mere case me aisa nahi hai… mujhe pyar hua nahi tha… maine pyar kiya tha.
update your baba aadam jamane ka quotes… what I want to say is it’s better to be
alone than be a chutiya…”
“par tu toh dono hee hai… laundibazi me pagal hua… ghamand me kabhi
basketball nahi khela aur hoshiyari me police se thuka lekin iske baad bhi shant
nahi hua… socha ki ghar me bhi tu waise hee rahega… jaise college me rahta tha…
isliye gharwalo ne bhi nikal diya… seriously Arman, tujhse bada chodu insaan
maine zindagi me nahi dekha… main tere sirf ek chiz ki tareef karta tha wo tha tere
basketball khelne ki ability ki… bc kya match tha wo… jab tune aakhir ke chanda
minutes me dhada-dhad goal pel diya tha… jisme se do half court se bhi the…
matlab meri toh gand hee fat gayi thi behanchod… bhagwan ne kya talent diya tha
tujhe lekin”
“Don’t thank God….”
“kya…”
“don’t thank god… yadi tu mere bure kaam ke liye bhagwan ko doshi nahi manta
toh phhir mere achchhe kaam ke liye bhagwan ko credit dena galat hai... yadi main
basketball court me half court se basket karta hoon toh ye mera talent hai… na ki
bhagwan ka… I made myself. Warna usne toh mujhe sabki tarah… goonga,
bewkoof hee paida kiya tha…” maine kaha aur Arun muh faadkar suntan raha… is
beech uski chilam bujh chuki thi…
Usne mujhe chilam pass ki aur machis jalane laga…
“tujhe pata hai… iski maa ka…”khaste hue maine kaha “tujhe pata hai.. bhagwan
ne mujhe kyun paida kiya…”
“nahi...”
“dialogue marne ke liye…”khaste hue maine dialogue complete kiya
“aaram se khich be… waise chal… time ho gaya…”
“kis chiz ka…”
“party… aaj hostel me party hai… farewell party… kuch log bol rahe the ki 5th
dimension wala teri conscious tujhe wapas dene wala hai... taaki tujhe maar sake”
"Aur main yaha kab tak rahunga.. ye decide karne wala wo kaun hota hai..."

409
"Tujhe ab bhi lagta hai ki ise tu control kar raha hai...?"
"Aur nahi toh kya... i'm the damn Originator.."
"And who made you the damn Originator.. ? Tu samajh kyun nahi raha.. tu ise nahi
jeet sakta... wo tujhe har jagah kaid kar raha hai... tu jitna aasan ise samajh raha
hai.. itna aasan ye hai nahi... Khair, tu ye sab chhod.. aur farewell party me chal..
kuch toh aisa kar ki kuch chize toh aasan ho...“
"Not interested...."
"ladke-ladkiya sab allowed hai… aur jo nahi aayega chahe wo ladka ho ya ladki…
sabko nanga karke hostel ke bahar murga banwaya jayega… aise farman maine
jaari kiya hai… tere naam se…”
“matlab…. Arman ka farman…”
“yaa...”
“aise me yadi main hee nahi gaya toh meri sarasar bezzati ho jayegi... main
chalunga..."apni jagah pe khada hokar maine kaha "chal phhir… izzat down nahi
honi chahiye… 5th dimension wale ke baare me baad me sochunga... waise bhi
mujhe yaha se bahar kaise nikalna hai.. ye pata hai ”
Maine ghadi me time dekha raat ke 9 baj rahe the… par aisa lag raha tha jaise din
ke 9 baje ho. Arun ke sath main Engineer’s Sea se hostel ki taraf badhne laga…
“maine suna ki Aradhna aa chuki hai yaha…”
“do baar chod bhi chuka hoon use.. workshop me. kya tight gand hai be..
madarchod pahle toh ghus hee nahi raha tha. bahut royi, vinti ki… lekin main nahi
ruka aur phhir jor se dhakka mara… tab andar gaya… Aradhna ki toh gand hee fat
gayi…(literally)... jab tak choda tab tak roti rahi… phhir wahi workshop me band
kar diya use… aaj ke baad roj uski gand marunga…”
“aur jab thak jaye toh boti-boti kar dena…”
“hat be… itni mast maal hai, tune use chhoda kyun..”
“gad-chataue... isiliye tu kabhi Shri Arman nahi ban paya…”
Main aur Arun Hostel pahuche… par humare pahuchne se pahle hee hostel ki chhat
me party shuru ho chuki thi… matlab Originator ki koyi izzat hee nahi... ya phhir
wo sab mere jaane se itne khush the ki mera intezaar hee nahi kiya. Well, hostel ki
chhat pe dj baj raha tha… log naach rahe the aur main.. chadda, banyan pahankar
upar chhat par pahucha… waha maine ek ladke ko pakad kar kheecha, jisne
badhiya kapda pahna hua tha aur uske kapde utarwakar maine pahan liya… phhir
maine goggle lagaya aur chilam muh me fasakar lighter mara aur chilam kheechte
hue aage badha…
410
“Arman bhai… kya dikh rele ho… matlab ekdum fad…”
“rajshri khila…”RP ke sar pe chilam rakhkar maine kaha
“arey bilkul…”fatak se rajshri ka packet mujhe dekar RP bola…
"In logo ki tarah... Tu bhi mere jaane se khush hai kya be..."jispar RP ne koyi
jawab nahi diya
.
“abey Arman… jise tune nanga kiya wo hostel ka launda tha…”
“toh…”
“abey toh… wo humari team ka hai aur tu use hee sabke saamne beizzat kar raha
hai”
“main ab in chizo se upar uth chuka hoon.. mere liye sabhi jeev-jantu saman hai...
uski jagah tu bhi hota toh main tujhe bhi nanga kar deta… chal baju hat… ”
Arun ko side karke main ladkiyo ke jhund ki taraf gaya.. jo apna gand fulaye…
mera matlab gaal fulaye, shanti se ek oor baithi hui thi.. in short kahu toh wo Esha
ka group tha. par waha Esha nahi thi… Divya aur Sona toh thi par Esha pata nahi
kaha thi…
“Esha kaha hai be… Chodari”Sona ke baju wali ladki ke muh me rajshri thook kar
maine kaha aur wo gusse se aankh fad-fad kar mujhe dekhne lagi…
“harami…”
“yesss... yahi toh main chahta tha ki koyi mujhe bas motivate kar de aur gali
sunkar main motivate ho jata hoon.. ”us ladki ka baal pakad kar maine use uthaya
aur kayi baar gol-gol use ghoomane ke baad uski choot me pura dum lagakar ek
laat mara..
"Aaaaaaaa..."
Wo waha peechhe rakhe sofe se takrayi aur dono hatho se apna choot pakad kar...
apna choot dabate hue rone lagi….
"maza aa gaya behanchod… i always wanted to kick a vagina.."maine kaha aur

gala fad kar hasne laga...
Us ladki ko rote hue apna chut dabate dekh mujhe itna maza aaya ki main uske
paas gaya aur..... ek aur baar uski choot me pura dum lagakar laat mara…. Jiske
baad wo ladki bahut ajeeb harqat karne lagi… uske choot me mere dusare laat ke
karan uska muh fata ka fata rah gaya aur wo thodi der tak apna muh fade, apne
choot ko dabaye ekdum waisich rahi… matlab na toh koyi aawaz aur na hee koyi
reaction… matlab kuch der ke liye ekdum shocked ho gayi thi. lekin phhir wo itni
jor se rone lagi ki... laga… kaan ke parde fat jayenge…
411
“RP, iska gala kaat ke neeche fek… aur gala katne ke baad iske upar moot dena”
Rajshri Pandey kisi aagyakari shisya ki bhati fork lekar us ladki ke gardan me
ghusa diya aur phhir fork se hee uski gardan fadne laga…
"Gardan nahi kat raha, Arman bhai..."
"Ye le..." table par rakha chaku fek-kar dete hue maine kaha...
Jiske baad RP ne chakur aur fork ke combo se us ladki ki gardan ki jo slice nikali...
wo dekhne layak tha. wo ladki bahut tadpi, bahut chillayi… yaha tak ki moot bhi
di... par main kya karta.. usne mujhe harami kaha tha… matlab swayam The
Originator ko… isliye ye sab toh use jhelna hee tha… anyway, jab RP ne us ladki ka
gala kaat diya toh main peechhe muda aur Sona ke peechhe jakar uski gardan
sahlate hue bola…
“Sona… mera lona”
“k..k..kya…”
“chal side me…”
Jiske baad Sona ek jhatke me turant khadi hui.. matlab usne koyi virodh nahi
kiya… face ka koyi exression change nahi kiya… shayad use mujhpar first year se
hee crush tha… ab main hoon hee itna cute…
maine Sona ko uthaya aur waha se jaane laga, Arun ek side me khada hokar chup-
chap ye sab dekh raha tha. shayad thodi der pahle maine use jo kaha tha use usne
dil me le liya tha…
“itna chup kyun hai… ja chod Divya ko. Main toh mazak kar raha tha…”
“abey main, bur nahi manta…”
“phhir chup-chap kyun khada hai... isko chodega kya…”Sona ki choot bahar se hee
sahlate hue maine kaha…
“nahi.. Divya ko… crush thi meri first year me…”
“toh problem kya hai…”
“problem ye hai ki yadi main use chodunga toh wo us chudai ko enjoy na karne
lage… iska mujhe dar hai. isliye main yaha konte me khade hokar is college ka
sabse chutiya ladka dhoondh raha hoon… jis-se chudne ke liye ek kutiya bhi mana
kar de aur jab wo ladka Divya ko chodega toh Divya ko khud se ghin ho jayegi…”
“all hail Lord Arun… bow… that's my bro... wo raha kallu Kanghi-chor…”
“haan, wo thik rahega…”

412
“abey Kariya gand…”Kallu ko aawaz dekar maine paas bulaya… aur jab wo paas
aa gaya toh maine kaha…
“Sona ko chodega ya Divya ko…”
“kya…”
“madarchod… Sona ko chodega ya Divya ko…”
“Esha ko… par wo dikh nahi rahi…”
Jiske baad main, Arun, Sona… waha mauzood har ek shaks Kallu Kanghichor ki
taraf dekhne laga… main toh ye soch ke hairan ho jata hoon ki time to time itni
pelayi khakar bhi uski himmat kaise ho jati hai... mere khilaf jaane ki.... Esha ke
baare me aisa toh college time me bhi koyi nahi bolta tha aur isne toh yaha bol
diya… maine apni aankhe band ki, dono hatho se apni aankhe mali aur phhir uska
tetua pakad kar RP se chaku maanga…
"Isme ye jaldi mar jayega.. fork de. I always wanted to do this..."
Maine apne hath me fork liya... kaliye ko neeche zameen me litakar Arun aur RP ko
use pakadne ke liye kaha aur apna kaam shuru kar diya. Is dauran Kallu yadi
thoda sa bhi hilta toh fork beasar ho jata.. lekin maine haar nahi mani aur dheere-
dheere hee sahi… uski gardan kaat-ta raha.. maine uske gardan ki ek-ek nash ko
kaata.. haddi tod di aur finally puri tarah uski gardan kaat kar jab main utha toh
mere pure sharir me sar se lekar kamar tak khoon se san chuka tha… maine apna
chehra saaf kiya aur Divya ko bhi apne sath aane ke liye kaha….
“tu mujhe maar de, lekin main tujh jaise sanki ke sath kabhi nahi jaungi…”rote hue
Divya boli…
“jayegi toh teri maa bhi…”
“kya.. meri maa…”
“Arman bhai.. le ke aaun kya iski maa ko… is Divya gadwi ko isi ki maa ka gand
chatwana..."
“ja.. aur jaldi lana… Godspeed”
“thik hai main chalti hoon…”rote hue Divya boli… “lekin meri maa ko kuch mat
karna…”
“sorry babe… ab toh tere sath-sath tere bagal me teri maa bhi ghodi banegi…”bolte
hue maine Divya aur Sona ka baal pakadkar zameen me ghistate hue waha se le
jaane laga….
Sona aur Divya ko mere dwara zameen me ghasit-te hee waha hadkanp mach
gaya... waha mauzood sabhi ladke jis par bhi mann kiya kood pade… kuch ne iska
virodh bhi kiya… par…. Ladkiyo ki choochi-gand dekhkar wo bhi khud ko nahi rok
paye..
413
Khair main.... Sona aur Divya ko lekar neeche apne room me jaane laga… maine
seedhiyo se utarte waqt bhi dono ko ghasit-ta raha.. jis-se unke sar seedhiyo se
takraye... wo dono roti rahi, mujhse bheekh magti rahi ki main unhe chhod du...
par unhe chhodne ke bajay main ek aur baar un dono ko seedhiyo se ghasit-te hue
upar le gaya aur phhir wapas seedhiyo se neeche laya...
.
Divya aur Sona ko apne room me lakar.. maine dono ko nanga kiya aur bistar par
aage Sona ko ghodi banaya aur uske peechhe Divya ko… Divya ko maine Sona ki
gand chatne ke liye kaha… jise wo fauran chatne lagi.. us se ban nahi raha tha..
par phhir bhi bina ruke Sona ki gand me jeebh firaye pade thi aur idhar maine,
Divya ki gand se apna lund sataya…. Aur ahiste-ahiste andar dalne laga...
"Aaahhh... maaa"Divya cheeckhi..
"Teri maa bhi yahi chillayegi.. rook thodi der.."
...ki tabhi upar chhat se ajeeb-ajeeb aawaze aane lagi… shayad upar ladayi ho rahi
thi. maine khidki se bahar dekha….
“andhera….? Ye kaise hua…”Divya ke gand se apna lund nikal kar maine socha…
"yaha toh andhera hota hee nahi.."
“andhera ho gaya… yani…”cheekhte hue Divya boli…
“chup be..”
Divya ko ghoomakar maine uska jabda pakda aur uske honth me apna lund
ragadte hue bola..
"Le choos.."
Par jab Divya ne apna muh nahi khola toh maine uska tetua daba diya... jis-se
Divya ka muh khula aur maine uske muh me lund dal diya..
“raat hui matlab Gautam aa gaya…”Sona ekdum se khade hokar boli… “isiliye..
isiliye Esha aaj raat party me nahi thi..”
“toh…”Divya ka gardan dabate hue uske muh me apna lund andar-bahar karke
maine kaha “soch toh use kaisa lagega jab use maloo hoga ki maine uski behan ko
choda… aur agla number uski maa ka hai…”
“Gautaaaaam….”Sona apna jism dhak-kar jor se cheekhi…
Aur uske cheekhne ke turant baad hee mujhe ek rod dikhayi diya.. jo ki mere seene
ko seedhe cheerte hue nikla tha… kuch der ke liye toh main waise hee khada raha
jaise kuch hua hee na ho aur jab saans lene ki koshish ki toh Gautam achanak mere
saamne aaya aur saamne se bhi ek rod ghusakar paar kar diya… mera dum ghutne
laga.. main ye bhool gaya tha ki saans kaise lete hai… maine saans lene ke liye

414
apna muh fada aur tabhi Gautam ne ek aur rod uthaya aur seedhe mere muh me
ghused diya...
“jaan pyari hai toh dobara mat dikhna idhar… tujhe thikane lagane ke baad tere
ek-ek dost ko niptaunga.. Arun… Saurabh … ek-ek hosteler ki maa chod dunga
main aur sabse pahle toh us Rajshri Pandey ki dayi chodunga.... aur ek baat apne
gand me bhar le… daring starts with me…”
“and ends with me…. and here i defeated self-claimed 4.0... he wanted to imprison
me... but see, i'm getting out of here. Tu college me bhi chutiya tha aur yaha bhi
chutiya hee hai.. ja.. jake apni behan ki gand ka khoon saaf kar.. hahaha... see you
later, waiter.."maine kaha.. mann me.
Aur ek baar phhir se main mar raha tha.. main wahi farsh par neeche pada raha
aur phhir achanak se sab kuch normal ho gaya.. main normally saans lene laga..
normally feel karne laga. Pahle ki tarah normally sar dard bhi shuru hua... Maine
apni gardan ghumayi toh dekha ki… mere pure sharir me patti bandha hua tha..
" mummy bana ke rakh diya mujhe in logo ne... kahi 100... 200 saal toh nahi beet
gaye..."
maine apna sar wahi aage-peechhe thodi der tak ragdata raha jis-se mujhe aabhas
hua ki mere sar ke baal udd chuke the.. aur toh aur main waha akela nahi tha…
“kahi main college ke second year me toh nahi hoon, jaha Gautam ke gundo ne
mujhe mara tha… ? yadi aisa ho toh…? Maza hee aa jaye. Kyunki yadi ye sahi hoga
toh phhir wo sab galat hoga… Sidar bhai zinda honge aur college ke do saal ab bhi
baki honge… maa kasam yadi ye sach hua toh pure mann se padhayi karunga…
gand maraye Esha, Gautam, Arun, Saurabh… hostel chhod dunga… daru chhod
dunga… duniya chhod dunga... Bas ye sahi ho jaye…”
Confirm karne ke liye maine aas-paas nazar mari… mere sirahne se right side me
lagbhag 60 degree angle par ek Buddha apni budhiya ke hath se khana kha raha
tha…
“do hafte se jyada nahi jiyega ye lawda… hath-pair thik ho jaye toh main khud raat
me mauka dekh ke marunga is buddhe ko… madarchod, mere saamne khana kha
raha hai… marega tu..”
Phhir maine left side me apni gardan ghumayi… jaha 20° par ek aurat aankho me
moot liye apne husband ke bagal me uska hath pakad ke baithi hui thi… wo apne
husband se kuch bol rahi thi.. par uska husband tha ki kuch sun hee nahi raha
tha… kash ki meri bhi biwi hoti… toh mast mutth marwata… is aurat ko iska
husband bahut dukh de raha hai… raat me isko bhi salta dunga…
Phhir meri nazar left side me hee 70 se 80° angle ke beech gayi. Main exact angle
nahi bata sakta kyunki ek toh meri bayi aankh se kuch khas dikh nahi raha tha
upar se tirchha dekhne se meri bayi aankh me dard bhi hone laga tha.. lekin maine
phhir bhi dekha ki shayad mutth marne ka koyi jugad jam jaye… par wo wala bed
toh khali tha. isliye main wapas apni aankh ki direction 20° pe set karke bejubaan
ki tarah lete aadmi ki aurat ko dekhne laga… maine imagine kiya ki uska husband
415
mar gaya hai aur wo gam me ro rahi hai… phhir main hero ke mafiq use dilasa
dene jata hoon aur dilasa dete-dete uska doodh dabakar uske pond me apna lund
ragadne lagta hoon… uske husband ki laash wahi mere saamne jis bed par hai usi
bed me us aurat ko jhuka kar us aurat ki saree uthakar uski chaddi utar kar
chodne lag jata hoon… aaahhhhh.
“thank god…”mujhe jaga hua dekh jab ek nurse ki nazar mujh par padi toh wo
boli… jispar maine apni nazar us aurat se hatakar us nurse ke taraf ki…
Nurse maal toh nahi thi par phhir bhi maine use dekhkar aankh mar di… jispar wo
mujhe ajeeb tarah se muskurate hue dekhne lagi…
“choo…choo…choooooo…choosegi kya…. lawda”maine pura dum lagakar kaha aur

phhhir sar itni jor se ghuma ki wapas apni aankh band kar li…
.
Mujhe ummid thi ki ab main wapas Originator wali duniya me jaunga aur Gautam
se apna badla lunga.. par sabse aham sawal ye tha ki main abhi hoon kaha aur ye
kaun sa saal hai.. yadi main apne college ke second year me hoon toh phhir ye
mere liye bahut achhi khabar hai kyunki tab MTL bhai ki maut, Aradhna ka meri
zindagi me aana, Golden jubilee me performance na de pana, 8th Semester me meri
thukayi hona ye sab mahaj mere dimag ka ittefaq hota… phhir na toh koyi River
View colony hoti aur na hee koyi Esha… mera matlab Nisha aur na hee Sonam… ab
toh mujhe khud ke astitva pe bhi shaq hone laga tha ki aakhir main hoon bhi ya
nahi... aur yadi ye sab… sab mere dimag ka khel hai toh phhir na toh koyi Angelina
hogi aur na hee koyi Madhulika…
“tabhi main sochu ki main school life me kaise cigarette pee raha tha… jabki jo
reality mujhe maloom thi uske according toh main school me bahut simple, sober
aur sweet type ka banda tha… wo zaroor mere dimag ki upaj hogi… warna kaun
aise raat-raat bhar jaagkar national highway me loot-maar karta hai aur kaun
jabran Daddu jaiso se bhidta hai… toh ye sab jhooth tha…? I’m sure ki main apne
college ke second year me maar khane wale kand ke karan yaha hoon na ki Daddu
ki maar ki vazah se… 2.0 ?... 2.0… two dot O ? ye bhi nahi hai… kyunki... 2.0 main
hee hoon..? phhir toh pakka main second year me hoon aur ye ICU ka hee scene
hai… let me guess… main is samay takla hoon… jo ki us samay bhi tha… damn
sure… main college me hee hoon. Bas jaldi se koyi college ka banda mujhse milne
aa jaye”
Main jab tak jaag sakta tha.. jagta raha.. kisi ke aane ka intezaar karta raha.. par
koyi nahi aaya.. kayi hafto tak koyi nahi aaya ya phhir kayi dino tak… mujhe
samay ka koyi andaza nahi tha. isliye mujhe aksar kuch ghante… din ke barabar
lagte the aur kuch din hafte ke barabar… mujhe kabhi bhi achanak hosh aata…
kabhi normally toh kabhi sar me tez dard ki vazah se. ek baar toh main chillate hue
utha… aisa kayi hafto tak chalta raha, ya phhir kayi dino tak.. mujhe thik se kuch
pata nahi.. main bas uthta… kuch der utha rahta... kuch der aur uthe rahne ki
koshish karta aur phhir so jata. Mujhe bade ajeeb-o-gareeb sapne aate the… jaise
ki ek sapne me main sirf isliye mar gaya kyunki mere paas khane ko kuch nahi tha.
ek sapne me mujhe zinda kaat diya gaya… aise kayi dil ko dahla dene wale sapne
mujhe aaye. Matlab, mera matha khisak gaya tha. Maine ek baar spane me yaha
ka sapna dekha.. matlab maine sapne me koyi jagah dekhi... jaha thak-haar kar
main so gaya,jiske baad maine sapne me dekha ki main yaha ICU me leta hua
416
sapna dekh raha hoon ki main sapne me sapna dekh raha hoon... mujhe
kuchsamajh hee nahi aa raha tha ki kya sach hai aur kya jhooth. Par is dauran jo
ek baat… jo ek sawal mere dimag me constant raha wo ye ki main hoon kaha… kya
Daddu mere dimag ka vaham tha ya phhir sach… ?
“thik hai.. dusare angle se sochta hoon. Mujhe yaha admit hue hafte toh hue hee
honge… phhir mujhe hosh aaye bhi kuch din hue honge, lekin mujhse milne abhi
tak koyi nahi aaya… yadi main college time me hota toh zaroor koyi na koyi
mujhse milne aata. Chalo, maan liya ki hospital walo ne mere dosto ko mujhse na
milne diya ho… lekin mere gharwale…? Unme se koyi kyun nahi aaya. Ye toh tabhi
ho sakta hai jab maine apni engineering comlete ki ho aur uske baad apne bade
bhai ki shadi me wo kiya ho… jaisa ki main manta hoon ki main kiya hoon. Jiske
baad maine apne gharwalo ka aur mere gharwalo ne mera tyag kar diya ho…
warna college time me rahta toh koyi na koyi toh zaroor mujhse milne aata. Mera
bhai nahi… mere papa nahi toh kam se kam meri maa toh zaroor aati. Lekin koyi
nahi aaya yani… yani ye sab sala sach hai… kash ki family show wala kand na
kiya hota… toh… anyway...., is angle se toh yahi lag raha hai ki Daddu… Ajmeri…
Nisha sab real me hai… kyun , 2.0 ? ye bhi pata nahi kaha mar gaya… ye hospital
wale, kuch batate bhi nahi. kam se kam mera laptop toh mujhe de de… ekat tv
series hee complete kar du…”
Khair main is sawal se jhoojhta raha aur Dheere-dheere meri situation me sudhar
hone laga… mera dahina toh nahi par baya hath kuch thik hua… jiske baad maine
left side me 20° angle par lete ek adhed umra ki biwi jab us-se milne aayi toh uska
gand dekhkar rook-rook kar mutth mara… rook-rook kar matlab, mera hath thodi-
thodi der baad bahut jyada dard dene lagta tha, isliye mujhe beech-beech me rukna
pad jata tha… aadha ghanta laga mujhe mutth marne me.
hospital wale mujhe kuch nahi batate the. wo na toh mujhe ye batate the ki mera
bill kaun pay kar raha hai aur na hee ye ki aaj din-taarikh kaun si hai… unke kuch
na batane ki ek vazah shayad ye bhi ho sakti hai ki main unse kuch puchhta bhi
nahi tha. Mujhe andar se feel hua ki yadi main.. yani ki swayam me Swayam Shri
Arman.. in logo se kuch puchhenge toh beizzati ho sakti hai... istarah na maine
kuch puchha aur na hee unhone kuch bataya. Maine bhi socha ki... chalne do
lawda, jab tak chalta hai... kaun sa yaha se bahar jaane ke baad bahar Angelina
mera wait kar rahi hogi...
istarah ICU me pade-pade din gin-ne ke aalawa mere paas aur koyi raasta nahi
tha. Beizzati na ho, isliye maine kisi se din, taarikh tak nahi puchha... balki din gin-
ne ke lliye maine khane ko target banaya… ek din me wo teen baar mujhe jhat type
ka khana dete the aur khane ki counting karke main din gin raha tha aur usi se
mujhe andaza hota ki abhi raat hai ya din…
.
“kis-se milna hai…?”
“Arman…”
“aage se right wale room me jayiye…”ek nurse ki aawaz mere kano me padi jiske
baad main kafi utsahit ho gaya tha. kyunki mujhe mere kayi sawalo ke jawab

417
mujhe ek sath milne wale the…. Jaise ki main kaha hoon aur kya sach hai... kaun
sach hai.
.
Maine dua ki.. ki ye mere gharwale ho ya phhir mere college ka koyi mera dost aur
jab wo manav mere saamne aaya toh…….
“Madhure and Shriwas…”mujhse milne aaye logo ko dekh kar maine kaha…
“sir bhi laga le…”mere bed ke paas rakhi chair me baith-te hue Madhure bola…
“sab pata chal gaya tere baare me…”muskurate hue Shriwas bola… “yakin nahi
hota ki itni purani aur chhoti si baat par tu Daddu se bhid jayega…”
“Daddu ka game hua….”
“nahi… zinda hai wo…”
“wahi… mera bhi wahi matlab tha… hai kaha wo…”
“jail me… thanks to you…”
“no problem…”
“nahi yar… sach me thanks. Tune jisliye bhi ye kiya ho, hume us-se matlab nahi…
par teri vazah se kayiyo ki zindagi sudhar gayi… kayi ladkiya apne ghar chali gayi
aur kayi bade-bade name saamne aaye… ab unme se adhiktar jail me hai ya phhir
farari kat rahe hai…”
“mera bill kaun bhar raha hai… yad rakhna mere paas footi kaudi nahi hai. isliye
yaha ka bill bharwa dena, warna yaha ka bill bharne ke liye mujhe NH-6 me phhir
se chori karni padegi…”
“Bairangi ji yaha ka bill de rahe hai…”
“thik hai… tu aaram kar… hum log toh aise hee aa gaye the…”apni jagah par khade
hote hue Shriwas ne kaha…
“yar Shriwas, suna hai ki hospital ki chay bahut badhiya hoti hai… ho jaye kya ek-
ek cup…”
“chalo… chay peene me kono burayi thodi hai...”

.
Shriwas aur Madhure ke jaane ke ek hafte baad tak main ICU me raha jiske baad
mujhe general ward me shift kar diya gaya… general ward me aane ke baad maine
doctor se, nurses se kaha ki main ab thik hoon, mujhe discharge kar do… lekin wo
lawde nahi mane. Phhir maine unhe kaha ki main swayam ek doctor hoon.. par.
wo lavde phhir nahi mane. Jiske baad maine unhe 8th Semester ki story sunayi aur
kaha ki main hee Arman hoon aur mujhe apna badla lena hai... lekin wo lawde
phhir bhi nahi mane aur bole ki yadi maine ab unhe pareshan kiya toh mujhe
electric shock denge...
418
Is dauran ek-do baar aur Madhure+Shriwas mujhse milne aaye... maine unhe bhi
kaha ki mujhe yaha se nikalna hai, mere fans bahar mera intezaar kar rahe hai...
lekin wo dono lawde bhi nahi mane... Jiske baad ek din main bathroom jaane ke
bahane hospital se bhag khada hua… par ye meri galti thi. maine socha tha ki main
ab bhi pahle jaisa fit-fat hounga aur kood-kad ke yaha se khisak lunga... lekin
main bhagte hue hospital ke main gate tak pahuchte-pahuchte do baar gira…
shuru me third floor par, jab do guards mere peechhe daude, lekin phhir bhi main
kaise bhi karke neeche tak yani ground floor tak pahucha par seedhi ke paas mere
waha pahuchne se pahle hee 4-5 guards khade the. jiske karan maine waha se
neeche parking me jaane wali seedhi par direct koodne ka socha. Mujhe maloom
tha ki aisa karna sahi nahi hoga aur isiliye main ye karne ke liye aur jyada
motivate hua… kyunki jo chiz mujhe nahi karni chahiye… wahi karne ki mujhe
chuluk rahti hai. Toh waha jab main third floor se seedhiyo ke raaste stick ke
sahare dheere-dheere langdate hue, girte-padte bhagte hue jab ground floor par
bas pahuchne hee wala tha ki mujhe waha mera intezaar karte hue 4-5 guard
dikhe… jiske baad maine ground floor se neeche parking me jaane wali seedhiyo ko
dekha aur guards ko dekhkar haste hue jaha tha wahi baith gaya…....... kya laga,
koodunga ? aur jab meri is harqat par hospital ke guards ki nazar gayi toh
unhone mujhe turant daudkar pakada aur wapas general ward me lejakar fek
diya…
.
“aisa kaun karta hai… aayye… kya samajhta hai khud ko. Management ne tere
karan mere ko chamkaya… Punha kidhihi nahi.. anyatha mee tumhala thappada
karin..”
“jaiiii Maharashtraaa…” General ward me chillakar maine kaha… jiske baad

Mujhe laga ki wo moti-bhaisi nurse jai Maharashtra sunkar khushi se wo bhi Jai
Maharashtra chillayegi… lekin wo nahi chillayi… aur main hasne laga...
“TV me toh aise hee dekha tha… 2-3 baar”
“why are you smiling… seems happy…”ek aur moti-tagdi nurse jo baju wale
patient ko dekh rahi thi mujhse boli...
“happy...? no… If I'm silent then I’m happy but if I’m smiling or laughing , I’m
depressed, full of anger and want to fuck someone. IN SHORT- My smile is more
dangerous than my silence... So, Why don't you go outside and take a flying fuck at
a rolling donut.... buffalo…”
Maine kaha aur phhir chup ho gaya...Ye maine jaan-buchkar nahi kaha tha,
matlab main uske sharir par koyi comment nahi karna chahta tha… wo toh…….
okay, ye maine jaan-buch kar hee kaha tha aur sach kahu toh ye kahne ke baad
mujhe bahut maza bhi aaya aur jor-jor se main hasa bhi, jiske baad waha general
ward me mauzood aur bhi log hasne lage jiske bad wo moti bhains waha se chali
gayi… wo bhi bina kuch kahe. Iske baad wo jab-jab round par humare ward me
aati, main use dekh kar hasna chalu kar deta tha aur mujhe hasta dekh kuch aur
log bhi hasna shuru kar dete…. Shuru ke kuch din toh wo moti sah gayi par phhir
ekdin usne khunnas me meri shikayat kar di… jiske baad ek doctor us nurse ko
lekar mere saamne aaya…
419
“kya name hai tumhara…”us doctor ne mujhse puchha…
“nahi bataunga…......... hahahahaha”
“no problem…”meri medical report wali file dekhte hue doctor ne kaha… jiske front
page me hee maine pen se choot banaya hua tha…. kul milakar kahu toh jabse
mujhe general ward me shift kiya gaya tha, main aisi ut-patang harqate karte hee
rahta tha… Doctor mere report file me choot dekh kar kuch nahi bola... bas
khunnas me, gusse se medical report ka wo page fadkar dustbin me fek diya
Main yaha se jald se jald nikalna chahta tha aur ye sab maine isiliye kar raha tha…
main isme kamyab toh nahi hua par mere general ward me shift hone ke 12 din
baad aakhir wo din aa hee gaya jjab hospital walo ne mujhe discharge kiya….
.
“har hafte ye teen injection lagwa lena warna infection phail jayega… medicine
time pe lena aur apna khayal rakhna…. Ab shayad tum pahle ki tarah ghoom-phhir
na pao… par maine is-se bhi bure halat dekhe hai… tumhe toh khush hona chahiye
ki tumhari halat kuch sahi hai… face bhi tumhara kharab ho chuka hai, yadi
surgery karani ho toh… inke paas contact kar sakte ho…”kisi surgeon ka card dete
hue us doctor ne mujhse kaha… “aur is galatfehmi me kabhi mat rahna ki hospital
walo ko tumne bahut pareshan kiya… Bairangi ji ke karan tumhe humne tolerate
kiya, warna 2 seconds me main tumhari zindagi ke sabse bure pal tumhe de sakta
tha…”
“chup be… mujhe mat bata ki mujhe kya karna hai. ek toh itne din se bore kar raha
hai.. upar se aaj jab jaa raha hoon tab bhi boring instruction de raha hai… main
amaratva ko prapt kar chuka hu.. isliye apni ye doctor-giri kisi aur ko dikhana
warna ek mukka chhati me markar puri haddi-pasli tod dunga… zameen me
letaakar aisa kachrunga na ki… ”
“get out…”
“hat lawda… jhat jaisi shakl lekar mere shakl ke baare me baat kar raha hai ki
main surgery kara loon… abey gandmare, mujhe dekh aur khud ko dekh... kaha
main Kudrat ka karishma aur kaha tu Kudrat ka shraap... tujhse achchha toh
mera lund dikhta hai…. aur bc kya gyan chod raha tha ki…. Ye toh kuch bhi nahi
hai, maine is-se bhi bure halat dekhe hai…. abey, jhat… ab tum mujhe chodna
sikhaoge….”
“bhag ja harami…. Nahi toh…”table par rakhi ek syringe uthakar wo doctor gusse
se kanpte hue chillaya...
“tu toh. bur maan gaya be… hat lawda, sachcha engineer nahi hai tu… waise, teri
biwi maal hai kya… dilana ek baar… ye le... phhir se bur maan gaya tu toh..
burmari ke"
Jiske baad mujhe do security guards ne waha se uthaya aur hospital ke main gate
ke bahar fek diya(literally) aur sath me ek polythene me medicine aur ek file jisme
mere liye descriptions.. prescriptions.. ascriptions.... likhe the… use bhi fek diya.
maine apne dimag me time reset kiya aur timer on karke ek taraf se walking stick
420
aur dusari taraf se hospital boundary ki deewar ka sahara lekar khada hone ki
koshish karne laga aur jab mujhe 10 minute aise ho gaye toh mujhe khayal aaya ki
doctor sahi bol raha tha… deewar ka sahare khade hokar maine lambi saans bhari
aur neeche pade medicine aur meri medical reort wali file ko dekha…
“Shri Arman doesn’t need anyone or anything….…”medicine aur medical report

wahi chhodkar main walking stick aur deewar ko pakad kar aage badhne laga…
“oye auto… rook… peechhe aa… abey aana… waha tak paidal aane me aadha
ghanta lag jayega mujhe..”
“Railway jaoge... Railway... Railway... Railway.. aa jao bhaiya, railway

wale...”auto rok kar auto wala chillane laga.. maine use dekha wo meri hee umra
ka tha ya phhir mujhse bhi chhota. Jab main use jawab dene ki bajay use dekhta
raha toh usne mujhse phhir se puchha…
“Railway bhaiya…?”
“ nahi.. Railway station toh kharid liya kal.. aaj soch raha hoon RVC kharid loon...
… par pahle ye le… lund pakad mera…” walking stick fek kar use dete hue maine
kaha... "ab andar kheech mujhe"
“thanks... lund wapis kar mera..." andar aakar hafte hue maine kaha
“kaha jaoge…”
“Bairangi…”
“kaun bairangi… Bairangi bol toh aise rahe ho, jaise Siddhart Singh Bairangi ho…”
Auto wale ki baat sunkar main mann hee mann muskuray aur Bairangi ke yaha
jana cancel karke use seedhe River View Colony chalne ke liye kaha… aaj itne dino
baad wapas River View Colony jakar mujhe thoda ajeeb lag raha tha… mujhe aisa
feel ho raha tha jaise main aaj pahli baar RVC ja raha hoon.. matlab same
depressed.. low .. down and out wali feelings jo yaha first time aate waqt maine
feel kiya tha. waise abki baar kafi kuch badal chuka tha. jiska sahi-shot andanaza
mujhe tab laga jab maine khud ko closet ke mirror me pura dekha.
Aur jaise hee khud ko usme dekha yakin hee nahi hua ki ye main hoon… matlab
mujhe apne chehre, apni body, apni personality ka hee toh sabse jyada ghamand
tha. par ab… aisa lag raha tha, jaise maine aaj tak jitney logo ko badsurat bolke
mazak udaya hai… ye sab usi ka nateeza hai. maine apne sar par hath ferte hue
khud ko dekha… mera sar ka aadhe se adhik hisse me baal nahi the, matlab baal
nahi aa rahe the... jo ki Daddu ke maar ki nishani ban chuki thi... aur waha ab
kabhi baal aayenge bhi nahi... mere right side wala gaal tab buri tarah fata hoga,
jab Daddu ne mujhe buri tarah mara tha… jiske baad waha taanke lage aur ab
taanko ne apna nishan chhod diya tha.. ek aur chiz jo maine notice ki thi... wo ye ki
jyada tez light hone par meri dahini aankh se dikhna band ho jata hai... kul
milakar mera baya hath... dahina pair... dahini taraf wali aankh... khatm ho chuki
thi. Upar se ab zindagi bhar mujhe ganja bankar rahna tha.

421
"MAHTARICHOD..." apne hath me pakde stick se closet ka aaina todkar, main wahi
neeche zameen par baith gaya…
.
"Doctor ke according ab main zindagi bhar sirf stick ki sahayata se hee chal
paunga. Yani ki ab main zindagi me kabhi basketball nahi khel sakta..... NH-6 me
dhamal nahi macha sakta … mujhe waise toh khud par kabhi taras nahi aata, par
aaj mujhe khud par bahut jyada taras aa raha tha...."
“ye maine kya kar diya…”neeche toot-kar bikhre aaine ke tukde me ek aur bar
khud ko dekh kar maine kaha…
“is-se achchha toh mar jata…”
“kaun…?”
“abey main…”
“2.0… ?”
“yeah…. really, is-se buri shakl maine zindagi me kabhi nahi dekhi…”
“maine bhi… tu tha kaha”
“ main har pal tere sath tha. ICU me, General ward me, phhir auto me bhi… bas teri
badsurat shakl dekh kar tujhse baat karne ka mann nahi kar raha tha…”
“isiliye maine hospital me aaina nahi dekha, ye sochkar ki jab discharge ho jaunga
toh pahle ki tarah thik ho jaunga…”
“ab koyi chance nahi… tujhe, tune kitni bar samjhaya ki sudhar ja… par tu toh The
Biggest, The Greatest, The Deepest ki rat lagaye baitha tha… badla kabhi bhi free-
fokat me nahi aata dost… bhari keemat chukani padti hai. example ke taur par tu
khud ko le le”
"There is no use crying over spilt milk“
“ab kya karega…”
“ab bacha hee kya zindagi me… isliye,baki bacha badla lunga… ab Esha aur
Gautam ka number… par uske pahle Nisha...”
Chapter-36: Agony and Angelina
“abhi bhi nahi manega…”
“you know my answer, dont you...”
“kisi ko call karu.. Nisha ko ya Varun ko…?”

422
“ Arman doesn’t need anyone or anything… now, i'm going to get some shut-eye…
see you tomorrow morning”stick zameen me tika-kar uske sahare khade hote hue
maine kaha aur bed ki taraf dekha...
Par bed toh waha tha hee nahi, uski jagah toh waha sirf raakh thi, jiske baad
mujhe dhyan aaya ki maine thandi lagne par aag ke liye bed ko part by part jalaya
tha. isliye main sofe me baitha aur band khidki ki taraf dekha… main khidki ke
bahar dekhna chahta tha… par itni himmat nahi thi ki chalkar utni door jaun aur
khidki khol kar wapas yaha baithkar bahar ka nazara dekhu… isliye maine
imagine kar liya ki khidki khuli hui hai aur bahar mast suraj ki roshani khidki ke
through mere room me mujh tak aa rahi hai… maine imagine kiya ki mere room ki
light maine band kar di hai aur pure kamre me andhera hai. suraj ki kuch kirne
khidki ke through mere room me aa rahi thi… maine apni gardan peechhe sofe par
tikaya aur so gaya…..
..
..
“Arman bhai…”
“arey hatt madarchod..”
“arey Arman bhai main hoon… Rajshri..”
“chal bhag... subah 7 baje soya hoon.. waise bhi kuch mahino baad 8th semester
khatm hone ke baad zindagi jhand ho jayegi… neend nahi aayegi, isiliye abhi
neend ka quota pura kar raha hoon…”
“arey Esha mam se related hai..”
“ main toh mazak kar raha tha… mera sense of humour toh tu jaanta hee hai...”
uthkar baithte hue maine kaha aur chadar lapet kar baith-te hue bola “bol de ki
usne.. I love you bola hai…”
“nahi bola…”
“phhir..”
“uski ek friend hai.. usi ki class me padhti hai. main us-se kab se line de raha tha…
phhir usne bhi mujhe thoda-bahut line diya matlab ki hum dono love conductor
the, insulator koyi nahi tha aur barabar ek-dusare ko line de rahe the… lekin usne
hostel ke hee second year ke launde ko propose kar diya do din pahle… tab se bahut
kharab lag raha hai… matlab kaise iska vivaran doon, samajh nahi aa raha… ek
baar phhir se wahi sab kuch ho raha hai... phhir se ladki mujhe dhokha de gayi aur
jab maine ye baat apne class ke dosto ko bataya aur unse help mangi toh wo bhi
mujhpar hasne lage… do din se mera mazak uda rahe hai.. aap anchoring ki
practice me aaj kal busy ho toh aapko bola nahi.. par sach me Arman bhai… life
bahut viran lag rahi hai. bhookh-pyas-neend-chain-vain sab udd gaya hai..”
“isme Esha se related kya hai…”

423
“hai na… mera do din se ye haal hai. aap toh char saal se Esha ko Gautam ke sath
dekh rahe ho… kaise jhela aapne… toh ab hua na Esha se related..”
“mujhse doglapan mat kiya kar. Madad chahiye toh seedhe aao.. mere saamne
gidgidao... main madad kar dunga.. time kya hua hai…”
“11 baj rahe hai…”
“chal.. phhir. Arun uth…”
“na toh main mahila pradhan movie dekhta hoon aur na hee mahilao se koyi
sambandh rakhta hoon aur na hee unse sambandh rakhne wale tum jaise
burchatto se… ”
“wo konte me pada danda utha…”jeans pahante hue maine kaha aur phhir aaine
me dekhkar Rajshri se puchha “bata, RP .. is college ka sabse handsome launda
kaun hai…”
“aap Arman bhai… aapko toh modeling-vodeling karna chahiye… kaha

Engineering kar rahe ho…”
“bata.. phhir bhi Esha nahi pat rahi.. itna mast dikhta hoon main, kabhi-kabhi toh
lagta hai ki khud ko Mr. Engineer ki upadhi de doon..”
“pat jayegi, Arman bhai… aap na dhang se line nahi marte…”
“nahi pategi…”karwat lete hue Arun bola
“cowards choose leave while stalwarts choose live… tu chal RP”
maine hostel warden ke room me rakha lohe ka rod uthaya aur hostel se bahar
aakar hostel ke board ki taraf dekha… jaha hostel board ke upar yani neeche ek
line likhi hui thi...
“jo akadta hai, wo pakadta hai- Arman”
Maine cigarette sulgayi aur RP ne Rajshri ka pouch fada aur hum dono college ki
taraf badh gaye…
“maine uske liye khud ko kitna badal diya tha, Arman bhai… ek hafte se Rajshri bhi
nahi kha raha tha… par kya fayda hua… pat wo junior se gayi aur maine jab us-se
puchha toh mujhe dehati, gutkha-khor, loser aur na jaane kya-kya bolne lagi… kya
maine galat kiya, Arman bhai… khud ko badalkar”
“ launda hai kaun se branch ka…”
“Mech. mechanical…”thoda hichkichate hue RP bola…
“wah… ek toh hosteler, upar se khud meri branch ka… fresher party me daru
pilaya hounga main usko aur tere karan aaj…. Khair, kaun sa mera koyi imaan,

424
dharam hai. confirm Mechanical ka hai..? kyunki hod chodega mujhe baad me yadi
us launde ne shikayat karwa di toh…”
“areyy hod kya kar lega… director hai na”
“Sidar uncle aaj upar se dekh ke kitne gussa ho rahe honge ki kaise humlog unke
marne ke baad unka naam ka… unke achchhayi ka misuse kar rahe hai…”
“Sidar bhai toh napunshak type the Arman bhai… aap chaho toh kya nahi kar
sakte. Maine aapka presence of mind kayi baar dekha hai… aap jitni jaldi situation
ko samajh kar uska solution nikalte ho wo koyi aur nahi kar sakta…”
“bas kar be… aur kitna chadhayega.”
“arey sach… main bhi aapke jaane ke baad aapki mafiq college me dhoom-dhadaka
karunga… kuch toh abhi se hee bolne lage hai ki main is college ka next Arman
hoon… main bhi ek din aapki tarah banunga…”
“it takes too much sacrifices to become AR-Man, you simply and specially cant
be.…”canteen me ghuste hue maine kaha aur RP ko wahi canteen ke gate par khade
rahne ke liye kaha…
mujhe waha rod ke sath andar ghusta dekh sab ghabra gaye aur canteen se bahar
hadbada kar bhaagne lage... sabki fati me aa gayi thi…………………………… well, aisi
meri soch thi ki aisa hoga, par hua nahi. koyi ek bhi apni jagah se nahi hila. Even
kisi ne notice tak nahi kiya. Isliye maine pure canteen me nazar mari aur jo pahla
banda mujhe Mechanical second year ka dikha seedhe usi ke paas gaya…
“kyun be… class bunk kyun kiya. Khud ko Shri Arman samajhta hai kya…”
“good morning sir..”
“ayushman bhava…”
“wo sir, aaj mess wale ne upma banaya tha breakfast me… isliye yaha charne aaya
hu”
“ kya gunda banoge, lawda aise me… khair tu Rajshri Pandey ki item ke aashiq ko
jaanta hai ? hosteler hee hai koyi…”
“kaun… Ranjan…”
“kaha hai…”
“wo kinare baitha hai… aapko hee dekh raha hai..”ek oor ungali dikhate hue usne
ishara kiya…
“kaha… wo…”
“haan…”
“thanks…”
425
Canteen ki Tables me rod thok-thok kar bajate hue main us ladke ki taraf badha…
aur jaise hee main uski taraf jaane laga, wo ekdum se utha aur canteen se bahar ki
taraf bhaga… lekin gate paas RP khada tha aur usne usko daboch liya…. RP use
full marne ke jugad me tha, lekin maine RP ko roka aur us ladke ko parking me
laya…
“aap hee ne kaha tha sir… ki hostel wala hostel wale ko nahi marega… humari
ladayi Gautam aur uske dosto se hai…”
“I’m the man of my word…”
“toh main jaun…”
“rook toh… main tujhe nahi mar sakta lekin Rajshri Pandey toh mar sakta hai…”
“I’m not the man ooof…. Aage kya tha, Arman bhai…”
“tu maar na… dialogue pe kyu dhyan de raha hai..”
“haan…”bolkar Rajshri Pandey ne us ladke ke gardan apni kohni me fasaya aur

uska gardan dabana laga…
“maaaadharchod.. mere saamne meri maal ko leke ghumega, uske sath valentine
week manayega, use movie dikhane le jayega, us-se chat karega, uski pic like
karega.. use pizza khilayega.. use apne dost ke room me lejakar uska bur
chatega…. Uska pond dabayega.. uske muh me mutth marega... Bhosdike…
le…”gardan daboch kar apne ghutne se us ladke ke pond me ek laat marte hue
Rajshri Pandey ne kaha…
“tuuujhse nahi pati toh main kya karu, sale shakl dekhi hai apni… din-bhar toh
gutkha khake idhar-udhar thookte rahta hai. shakl dekh ke baat kiya kar…”
“maadharchod… Rajshri is life aur apne senior se aise baat karta hai... sale bol toh
aise raha hai, jaise Arman bhai jitna handsome dikhta ho"ek aur baar ghutne se
uske pond me markar RP bola aur Parking me khadi bike par us ladke ko jhuka
kar, uske peeth me back to back mukka marne laga…….
Maine socha ki RP ab rukega… ab rukega, lekin uske andar itni khunnas thi ki wo
mukke pe mukka mare ja raha tha… wo haaf bhi raha tha aur maar bhi raha tha..
uske muh se Rajshri tapak kar us launde ke upar bhi gir raha tha…. Par RP nahi
ruka… is dauran waha aur bhi log aaye…
“ho gaya bas kar….”RP ko alag karte hue maine kaha “energy bacha kar rakh… jab
iski item aayegi toh uske saamne marna ise... HOD gand toh fad dega meri… par
chalta hai… internal me lawda dega… mujhe bhi aur tujhe bhi… manzoor hai…?”
“na… nahi… ek toh waise bhi 5.9 chal raha hai mera……”
“mc jab gand me dum nahi rahta toh aaya mat karo. Chodu hoon kya main,
lawda.. chal peechhe ja… mera 7.5 + chal raha hai”
426
“Riya aa rahi hai…”peechhe jate hue Rajshri bola
“Riya kaun”
“arey wahi… meri maal…”
“ok… plan 2”maine Ranjan ka baal pakda aur Parking me uska baal pakad kar hee
khada raha… “hath neeche… kar”
Aur phhir uske gaal me uske maal ke saamne ek jhapad mara… parking me mahol
garam hone laga tha, kayi launde waha ghera banane lage the… launda hosteler
tha isliye koyi jyada kuch kar nahi sakta tha… mere kuch chuninda sathi College
gate ke paas chale gaye the, taki koyi college me jakar kisi ko bata na sake….
Maine ye sab mazak me shuru kiya tha, socha tha… ki aisi hee warning dekar
chhod dunga, lekin jaise-jaise bheed badhi… main serious hota gaya…. Matlab ab
meri izzat daav pe thi ki Arman apne opposition ko kitna aur kaise dominate karta
hai... is tarah ab ye matter mera na hote hue bhi mera ban gaya tha..
“Ranjan….”uski maal Parking ke bahar se hee apne boyfriend ko dekh kar daudte
hue chillayii...
“Ranjan and Riya… just like Arman and Angelina… hath neeche…”
“I’m sorry… sir…”jab maine use uski item ke saamne ek aur jhapad mara toh wo
bola…
“sorry kisliye…? Galti teri thodi hai… galti toh meri hai. mujhe aisa nahi karna
chahiye… koyi aur hota toh use apne is kaam ka anjaam bhugatna padta… lekin
main Arman hoon… hath neeche…”
Maine ab tak Riya ki taraf achchhe se nahi dekha tha, mera pura concentration
Ranjan ko marne me laga hua tha…. kayi baar Ranjan ka gaal laal karke maine
use chhoda toh dekha ki… ki… waha Riya ke paas Esha aur Divya bhi khadi thi…
bc.. ye dono kab aayi.. khair, maine wapas Ranjan ka baal pakda aur us-se
puchha…
“bata be… main jyada handsome hoon ya Gautam… .”
“aap…”
“chal bhag hostel aur jate hee Riya ko block marna… fb me, whatsapp me, dil me…
har jagah… ”
Uske baad main un teeno ki taraf badha… mujhe apni taraf aata dekh Esha waha
se chali gayi, lekin Riya aur Divya wahi khadi rahi…. Main is samay khud par kafi
proud feel kar raha tha…
“jab tum mera kuch ukhad nahi sakte toh mujhse nafrat karne ka kya fayda…”Riya
aur Divya ke paas jakar main bola..
.
427
.
....
Tabhi doorbell ke bajne ke karan meri aankh khuli… news paper main leta nahi
aur doodh main peeta nahi, phhir itti subah kaun aa gaya… khidki kholkar maine
kaha.
“subah ho gayi… ? chalo, in sabka ek toh fayda hua ki ab neend badhiya aati hai… "
“Arman…”
“koyi ladki aawaz mar reli hai..”
"Ladki...? VR ?"
Gate me koyi ladki hai, ye khayal aate hee maine stick uthaya aur goggle lagakar
gate ki taraf badha… phhir mujhe khayal aaya ki kahi mere hath me stick aur kala
chashma dekh kar mujhe andha na samajh le, isliye maine goggle utar diya…
maine gate khola… gate ke saamne do log the… ek nar aur ek maada… aur dono ko
main jaanta tha.
“Arrrrman….”mujhe dekhte hee Nisha boli aur bolne ke baad chup ho gayi…
“it’s A-r-m-a-n..”
Jis par wo thoda sa muskurayi… actually, wo dono muskuraye…
“ tum dono chup-chap bina koyi sympathy-giri kiye yaha se nikal lo aur Varun,
main ab bhi tujhse jyada handsome dikhta hoon aur ye sar pe kya baandha hai..?
aur tu takla kyun hua … Sonam mar gayi kya ？. Ab har kisi se chodayegi toh yahi
hoga .... kisi ne muh me aisa lawda diya hoga ki saans nahi le payi hogi”
“dekha Nisha, maine kaha tha na aur ek tum thi.. jo bol rahi thi ki… itna time ho
gaya hai toh Arman badal gaya hoga...”
‘‘time changes everyone except Shri Arman… I am independent of time and space...
mujhe yaad hai, tu ek baar Sonam ke kahne pe jhadu mar raha tha. mere bhi room
me maar de yar.. purane dino ki khatir... itna toh kar hee sakta hai…”
Jiske baad Varun waha se jaane laga.. tabhi mujhe achanak yaad aaya
“Sonam ko bolna ki............ uski maa ka bhosda…”
Khisiya kar Varun toh waha se chala gaya lekin Nisha wahi khadi rahi.
“tu kya blowjob deke jayegi.. tu bhi nikal.. but wait, tu Varun ke sath kyun aayi ?
tu Gautam ke sath soti hai na.. I mean, David ke sath. Phhir Varun ke sath kaise…?
Kahi tera Varun ke sath affair toh nahi chal raha… mujhe shuru se tere character
par shaq tha… zaroor tu, Sonam aur Varun threesome karte hoge… tabhi... tabhiii..
main sochu ki tu mujhse achanak ladne kyu lagi thi....”

428
“jab tum hospital me admit the, tab main tumhe dekhne aayi thi… par tum kisi
nurse se lad rahe the, use abuse kar rahe the.. kafi hasi aayi tumhe hospital me
waisa dekh… Varun dikhata nahi, par wo kayi din hospital aaya tha, tumhe
dekhne… par tumse mila nahi.”
“toh… kya ukhad liya usne, aisa karke.. hahaha”
“toh ab bhi waqt hai… maine Varun jaisa dost nahi dekha.”
“tumne abhi mujhe nahi dekha… tum mere baare me siway mere lund ke kuch nahi
jaanti...”
“ok… bye… and I'm married to David…”
“I don’t… care. I’ll always see you as my slut…"
Nisha ke jaane ke baad main peechhe muda par main peechhe nahi mud paya
kyunki peechhe mudte hee maine khud ko us chair me baitha hua paya.. jaha main
kal raat soya hua tha...
"Wasn't i talking to Nisha ? If yeees.., then why am i still on my couch.. and if No,
then...... fuck you, man... "
.
.
.
Main thodi der aur waise hee sofe par raha aur phhir taiyar hone laga...
“iski maa ka... itni dhoop....” room ke bahar kadam rakhte hee maine kaha aur
wapas andar aaya...
"ek aankh se toh abhi se hee dikhna band ho gaya..."goggle lagakar wapas bahar
kadam rakhte hue maine kaha "i hate everything.. including sun."
“so, what’s next…”
“Shriwas texted me, last night and i believe, Bairangi should have my autographs…
so, the next stop is Bairangi House..."
Is tarah khadi dopahari me main chashma-vashma mar ke... taiyar-vaiyar hoke

Bairangi ke ghar ke liye nikla... . Ganga-jamuna ke kand ke baad kayi chize badal
gayi thi... ab main daud nahi sakta tha yaha tak ki dhang se chal bhi nahi sakta
tha... mujhe apne room se yani RVC se highway tak pahuchne me hee bc aadha
ghanta lag gaya... maine deewar ke sahare teji se chalne ka bhi prayas kiya lekin
phhir bhi meri speed me kuch khas parivartan nahi hua aur aadhe ghante me main
highway par pahucha aur wahi highway ke kinare lage ek thele wale ke paas rakhi
chair me hafte hue baith gaya...
"Do cigarette do... khamkha Daddu ke chakkar me fasa... sale ne mujhe apahij
bana diya.. shakl ki maiyya chod di alag... ab jeene ka kya fayda. 5th dimension
429
wale se koyi deal karke main bhi chalta hoon is duniya se... oye auto...rook... rook
be..."
"Kaha ja rahe ho..."auto ke rukne par maine puchha...
"Railway...."
"Muh me le lo yar mera..."
Jiske baad auto wale ne mujhe upar se lekar neeche tak dekha aur chup chap waha
se chala gaya....
"Ye toh lada hee nahi... koyi baat nahi... next wale pe try karta hoon...
autoooo..."main jor se chillaya "kaha ja rahe ho..."
"New bus stand..."
"Le lo yar muh me mera...."
Iske baad wo dusara auto wala bhi mujhe ghoorne laga aur uske sath me us auto
me baithe log bhi...
"Aaja lad le... lad le be... mera din ban jayega... hat bc... darpok... kariya gand nahi
toh... oye auto rook..."
Maine teesare auto wale ko rukwaya... wo udhar hee ja raha tha.. jidhar bairangi
ka ghar tha... isliye use bina muh me diye, Main chup chap us auto me baith gaya...
.
"Baithiye... Sarkar aapse kabse milna chah rahe the..."Bairangi ke naukar ne

mujhse kaha...
Mujhe bairangi ke naukar aaj bhi wahi bithaya jaha aakhiri baar Shriwas aur
Madhure ke sath bithaya tha. Aur us din ki tarah mujhse aaj bhi puchha ki mujhe
kya chahiye... jiske baad maine bhi us din ki tarah aaj bhi use daru ke liye bola aur
us din ki tarah aaj bhi uska reaction mujhe kha jaane wala tha... khair... us din ki
tarah usne mujhe aaj bhi kuch nahi kaha aur waha aur chala gaya... jiske baad wo
Bairangi ki wheelchair dhakelte hue thik usi tarah room ke andar laya jaise us din
laya tha... Bairangi ne aaj bhi wahi kapde pahne the jo usne us din pahne hue the.
Matlab sabkuch itna similar tha ki... mere dimag me collision hone laga... mera
dimag guch-puch hone laga.. mujhe aisa laga jaise koyi mera dimag nichod raha
hoon... matlab mujhe puri marne wali feelings aane lagi. Maine apni aankhe band
ki aur us din ki tarah aaj bhi sofe me peechhe apna sar tikaya... jiske baad us din ki
tarah aaj bhi mere dimag me ek picture ghoomi… jisme kisi jagah, jaha kafi
andhera tha… waha koyi ladki lahu-luhan padi thi… uska chehra mujhe bilkul bhi
nahi dikh raha tha par aawaz jani-pahchani thi aur jab maine us ladki ko dekha
toh usne ektak mera name liya….
“please mujhe mat maro… tum jo bologe main karungi…”

.
"Fuck.. Ye bhi us din dekha tha... ye ho kya raha hai... "

430
"Mujhe tumhare baare me pata chala..."Bairangi bola..
"Aapne vaada kiya tha ki yadi main aur Daddu dono zinda bach gaye toh main us
se paanch minute jail me mil sakta hoon... mere khayal se aapne mujhe isi liye
yaha bulaya hai.."apne sar ke bal nochte hue maine kaha.. jiske baad mujhe
andaza hua ki mere sar par toh baal hai hee nahi... isliye phhir maine imagine kiya
ki mere sar par baal hai aur phhir main unhe nochne laga..
"Jaroor.. kyu nahi. Par maine tumhe yaha... tumhara shukriya ada karne ke liye
bulaya hai..."
"Cheers... i mean.. that's ok.. no problem..."
"Hmmmm...."apne naukar ko ishara karke Bairangi ne kuch ishara kiya aur mujhe
apne sath chalne ke liye kaha...
"Waise aapko bhi thank you... afterall aapne hospital ka pura kharcha jo uthaya..
."
"I owed it to you....."
"Daddu ko fasaya kaise..."Bairangi ke bagal me stick ke sahare dheere-dheere

chalte hue maine kaha...
"Daddu ke paas mile notes ke number... NH-6 me ambulance se chori hue notes ke
number se match ho gaye... jis se NH-6 me pichhale kuch mahino se hone wali loot
ka pura blame uspar gaya... phhir jungle me jab police uske aadmiyo ka peechha
kar rahi thi toh police par bomb ke sath attack karna... Ajmeri bai ke kothe ki
ladkiyo ke bayan aur katta smuggling ke case se use aatankwadi ghosit karne me
jyada dikkat nahi hui... upar se tumne jo uska signature... ek paper ko modkar liya
tha. Wo bhi bahut kaam aaya..."bolte hue Bairangi ek room ke bahar ruka aur
meri taraf mudkar mujhe andar dekhne ke liye kaha...
.
"Ye meri patni hai.. jo mere bete ki hatya ke baad se aisi hai... "
"Aisi hai..? Matlab kaisi hai..."andar jhakte hue maine mann me kaha"Chhee
lawda.. kitna bekar dikh rahi hai... jhatahi.. ise dekh kar toh mera lund bhi ulti kar
dega.. mar kyu nahi jati be raand.. ."
"Jab se mere beta gaya hai tab se... se..... iska ilaaj chalu hai..."
"Rona mat re... madarchod..."maine phhir ek baar mann me kaha aur bahar
security observe karne laga ki yadi by chance mujhe Bairangi ko jaan se marna
pade toh mujhe kya-kya karna padega...
" unke doctor hai... Dr. Boaz aur Dr......."
"Forgive me, for my...... insensitivity...sir but i'm not interested.."
"I was hoping for some........... but never mind, i'll do it alone..."
431
" chaprasi samajh rakha tha kya. Main phhir dayi bhi chodta hoon..."Bairangi ko
dekhkar muskurate hue maine socha...
.
Jiske baad Sidharth Bairangi ne mujhse aur koyi baat nahi ki aur thodi der me
mujhe apne do aadmiyo ke sath waha se bhej diya... main un dono ke peechhe
peechhe chalne laga. Ab wo thahre hatte-katte.. ekdum fit-fat aadmi. Unhone
mujhe ek taraf ishara karke apne peechhe aane ke liye kahkar teji se us taraf chal
diye aur Main dheere-dheere unke peechhe chalne laga... aur chand minute me hee
main unse kafi pichhad gaya...
"Sale log.. mann me bahut has rahe honge... mujhpar. Ab toh katta bhi nahi hai
mere paas ki raaste me uda doon, bhosdiwalo ko... jhand ho gayi hai meri
zindagi... achchha hua, lund sahi-salamat hai aur barabar ladkiyo ko dekh kar
khada hota rahta hai. Ab ye kaun aaya..."Bairangi ke ghar me ghus rahi ek car ko
dekh kar maine socha
"zaroor... randiya magwayi hongi, Bairangi ne. Uski biwi toh ab lawda choosne ke
layak bhi nahi rahi... isiliye Bairangi ne rakhail bulwaya hoga... ya phhir hijdo ko
bulwaya hoga... gandmara Bairangi... sala mujhe toh uspe pahle se hee shaq tha.
Tabhi aaj mere lund ki taraf baar-baar dekh raha tha... Par usko maloom nahi ki
yadi main chodunga toh uska bistar bhi uski biwi ke bagal me lag jayega... sala...
tharki budhau... hattt.. iski maa ka..."
.
Apni utsukta ki khatir ki is aane wali car me kaun hai ye dekhne ke liye main wahi
stick ke sahare khada ho gaya...
"Toh ye hai doctor Boaz... maal hai ye toh... anyway..."waha se aage badhte hue
maine kaha... par.. thoda aur aage jakar main peechhe muda aur phhir se us item
ko dekha... dr. Boaz... Boaz.....
Main phhir aage badha par phhir peechhe palta aur abki baar pura peechhe
palta...
"Dr. Boaz... ghante ka Boaz... ye toh Angelina hai... Angelina... confirm.. Angelina
hai... Arun ki maa ki kasam... hundred one percent... ye Angelina hai... ek minute
abhi confirm karta hoon..."
.
Main wapas teji se muda aur jaha Car khadi thi us taraf jitni speed se chal sakta
tha... chalne laga... shuru me toh usne mujhe dekha bhi nahi par main jab hafte
hue.. teji se uski taraf badhta raha toh wo meri taraf dekhi aur jab main uske aur
paas gaya toh thoda peechhe khisak li...
.
"Angelina... right.."khush hote hue main bola...
"Yeah..."
"Silva..."
432
"Yeah..."
"Angelina Silva... ?"maine ek aur baar puchha
"Yes... yes..."
" main Arman..."
"Nice to meet you, Arman..."
"Arey main... Arman... Shri Arman... the platinum bar"
"Nice to meet you, Shri Arman..."
"Arey main... hum dono camping ke dauran dam me mile the.. humne ek dusare se
platinum bar me baat ki thi... phhir maine tumse sex karne ki apni ichchha bhi
prakat ki thi jise tumne swikar kar liya tha... par actual me tum mujhe sabak
sikhana chahti thi aur konte me lejakar chaku mar diya tha... remember...?"
"Oh God..! Meri mulaqat pagalo se hee kyu hoti hai..."upar dekhti hue Angelina
boli aur phhir meri taraf dekhte hue apna sar hilane lagi...
"Chal na.. bahut hua. Kya natak kar reli hai.."
"Oh hello..... main na toh tumhe jaanti hoon aur na hee tumse kabhi mili hoon aur
na hee kabhi... kya name bataya tumne..."
"Arman... single a"
"Aur naa hee is naam ke kisi shaks se mili hoon...."
"Natak band kar... bahut ho gaya... munda kharab hua toh Ajmeri bai ke paas bhej
dunga..."
"Ajeeb aadmi ho... jab kaha ki main tumhe nahi pahchanti tab bhi chipke ja rahe
ho.. pagal ho kya..."
"Haan.. love you."
"Suck your own balls..."ye bolkar Angelina ne mujhe dhakka diya aur waha se
andar jaane lagi...
Angelina ke dhakka dene ke karan mera balance bigda aur main wahi uske car ke
paas neeche jor se gira...
"Deeper i fall, higher i rise..." stick ke sahare khade hote hue maine kaha aur apni
ghadi me time dekha...
"1 baje ye Bairangi ke yaha aati hai... par yadi ye... Bairangi ki lugayi ka ilaaz kar
rahi hai toh phhir ye Dr.Boaz kaun hai aur Angelina mujhe ekdum se kaise nahi

433
pahchan payi ya phhir jaan-buchkar mujhe na pahchanne ki acting ki.. ek

minute..."
Maine, apna shirt uthaya aur kamar me chaku ka nishan check kiya.. jo ki tha.
Yani Angelina mujhse mili thi aur usne chaku bhi mara tha... phhir BC pahchan-ne
se inkar kyun ki...
"ab samajh me aaya ki log mujhse kitni nafrat karte hai. Par use dekh ke lag nahi
raha tha ki wo acting kar rahi hai.. matlab wo full frustrate hui hogi... tabhi mujhe
dhakka diya. Par ye kaise ho sakta hai... mujhe pakka yaad hai ki main camping
me is se mila tha... warna mujhe iska name kaise maloom rahta... khair... abhi
Daddu pe concetrate karta hoon.. Silva darling toh ab Nagpur me hee hai..."
.
Main, Sidharth Singh Bairangi ke dono aadmiyo ke sath jail me ghusa... jail me,
pahle toh unhone mujhe metal detector se gujara aur jab main metel detector test
pass kar gaya toh unhone meri stick chheen li aur use check karne lage...
"Yadi mujhe Daddu ko marna hota toh tumhe lagta hai ki wo abhi tak zinda hota ?
aur main front gate se aata..."deewar ke sahare khade hokar maine kaha...
"Aapad turungaat sodu ichchhita asalela tyacha mitra asu shakto..."
"Jaiiii Maharashtraaaaaaa...."main chillaya...
"Murkha vyakti..."
"Jo mujhe chodu samajhte hai... sabse jyada wahi chudte hai...anyway "
.
Iske baad wo kuch nahi bola aur meri stick mujhe wapas kar di.. actually, wo
bolna bahut kuch chahta tha.. par Bairangi ji ke naam aur unke do mustando ki
vazah se usne kuch nahi kaha.. jiska nateeza tha ki aadhe ghante ke aur aise dand-
fand procedure ke baad main Daddu ke saamne tha. Jis room me main tha.. wo kafi
bada tha aur beech-o-beech salaankhen (trellis) thi.. salaankhon ke is taraf main
tha toh us taraf Daddu... Mujhe zinda dekh uska khoon khaul utha aur khaulta bhi
kyun nahi.. meri vazah se uska ladka jo mara tha.. wo salaankho ke peechhe se
mujh par jhapatta marne ki koshish karne laga... galiya bakne laga... aur bakta
bhi kyun nahi... meri vazah se uski rakhail jo mar chuki thi. Main Daddu ko aise
hee tadapte hue... dekhta raha aur jab wo shant hua toh main uske paas gaya...
"Mere kutte ko apni taraf milakar tu khud ko bahut bada turram khan samajh
raha hai.."
"kutta tune pala, boti maine khilayi... waise bhi main math ke field se hoon, mujhe
bas last me answer laane se matlab hai, method koyi bhi ho, beech me kitni bhi
kata-piti kyun na ho.. mujhe fark nahi padta. .. Tujhe College me mujhe maarne ke
liye gunde nahi bhejne chahiye the.... tere karan main ek semester pura paper nahi
de paya tha... maine meri ragging lene walo ko itna mara.. itna jaleel kiya toh
phhir tujhe kaise chhod sakta tha... tune socha ki tere bhatije ko college ke kisi
jhandu jaise ladke ne jhund banakar mara hoga... Par.. wo main tha, jisne tere
bhatije ki daiyya-maiyya chod di thi... pura college yahi manta tha ki Gautam ka
434
baap gunda hai.. main bhi yahi manta tha, par baad me mujhe pata chala ki unka
asli source toh tu hai... Gautam ke baap ki yani Maravi ki gundagardi me mukhya
kirdar toh tera tha. tere dum par Gautam ka baap uchka karta tha aur uchke bhi
kyun na... tu uska saga bhai jo thahra... mujhe ye yaad nahi ki mujhe tere baare
me kaise pata chala... bas ek din main utha aur mujhe tere baare me sab kuch
maloom tha. Tu kaha rahta hai... kya karta hai.. kaha karta hai. Sab kuch. Mujhe
toh ye bhi pata hai ki Nagpur se sate kis gaanv me tere katte bante the... par tera
beta unexpected tha.. 5th dimension wale ne yaha mujhe dhokha diya, wo mujhe
marwane ke full plan me tha.... "
"Tu mujhe jaanta nahi... main Daddu hoon... yaha se nikalne ke baad tere pariwar
ke ek-ek aadmi ki gand me katta chalaunga... main kitna bada harami hoon tu abhi
nahi jaanta. Tu sochta hai ki teri vazah se kuch randiya mar gayi, ya ek-do log ke
pariwar ka naash ho gaya toh tu meri tarah bura ban gaya ? Burayi tune abhi
dekhi nahi... main tujhe dikhata hoon... Bachpan me mera baap daru peekar ghar
aata tha aur ghar me sabko nanga karke marta tha... fir chahe wo meri maa ho ya
meri badi behan.. Mere ghar me sab mere baap se pareshan the.. Lekin main nahi...
Balki main toh har din yahi prarthna karta ki mera baap aaj bhi daru piye aur
sabko nanga karke mare, kyunki is dauran mujhe meri behan aur meri maa ko
nanga dekhne ka mauka jo milta tha... phhir ek baar garmi ke dino me meri maa
ko lakwa maar gaya... wo na toh kuch bol pati thi aur na hee apna sharir ka koyi
hissa hila pati thi... hum do bhai aur ek behan the.. Hum teeno apne baap ke
bharose the par mera baap daru peekar kahi bhi pada rahta tha... Maravi us
samay bahut chhota tha, lekin mujhe duniya ki samajh ho chuki thi. Mujhe aksar
kisi aurat ko chodne ki bahut ichchha hoti thi, par kahi jugad nahi jam raha tha...
aur phhir ek din jab meri behan mere maa ke kapde badal rahi thi toh mujhe meri
maa ki gori-gori chikni jaangh dikhi... jise dekhte hee mere andar kamukta ki lahar
daud gayi.... main samajh gaya ki jis chiz ko main itne dino se bahar taalash raha
tha wo toh mere ghar me hee hai...
Us din jab meri behan school padhane gayi toh maine Gautam ke baap yani Maravi
ko khelne bhej diya aur apni maa ko hee nanga karke choda... maine apni maa ki
gand bhi mari. Meri maa paralyzed bhale hee thi par wo shayad ye jaan gayi thi ki
main uske sath kya kar raha hoon. Iske baad main sirf mauka dekhta tha ki kab
meri maa mujhe akele mile... maine kayi mahino tak apni maa ko choda.... aur
phhir ek din jab roj ki tarah meri behan school aur Maravi khelne gaya tha toh
main bistar par apna lund tankaye chadha... maine, apni maa ki saree ko kamar
tak khiskaya aur bur chatne laga... uski jaangh masalne laga... lekin jab main
upar aaya toh dekha ki meri maa toh tapak chuki thi... wo toh bhagwan ko pyari
ho gayi thi.. lekin main kya karta... ? Mujhe choot toh chahiye hee tha... upar se
mera lund bhi khada ho chuka tha toh maine apni mari hui maa ko hee ulta
paltaya.. use ghaseetkar tanki ke paas le gaya, uska gand saaf kiya.. phhir uski
gand chati, uske gand me ungali ki aur phhir apna lund daal diya... kam shabdo
me kahu toh maine meri maa ke mar jaane ke baad bhi use choda... meri maa ke
jaane ke baad mujhe phhir se choot ki kami hone lagi, isliye maine abki bar apni
behan ko nishana banaya... maine apni behan ko kayi din jabardasti bistar me
baandh kar choda.. Maravi ko ye pata tha... lekin usne kisi ko kuch nahi bataya...
shuru-shuru me toh meri behan natak karti thi lekin phhir jab maine kayi baar use
chod diya toh phhir wo shanti se chudwane lagi... kya bolte hai use...
compromise... hahaha... Maine use ye bhi bataya ki main... maa ko bhi chodta
tha... jis par usne mujhe bataya ki use ye baat maloom thi. Main toh madarchod
hairan hee rah gaya ye sunkar... par uske is shabd ne mere andar itna josh bhara
435
ki main us din ghanto uski gand-choot chat-ta raha... maine use kayi baar Maravi
ke saamne bhi choda aur phhir ek din apni behan ko Maravi se chudte hue dekha....
wo aisa isliye nahi karte the kyunki unka bhi mann karta tha.. wo aisa isliye karte
the kyunki unke andar mera khauff tha.... jo ki ye sunne ke baad tere andar bhi
hona chahiye... kyunki meri maa ke marne ke kuch mahine baad maine apne baap
ko toilet saaf karne wali acid jabran pila kar maar diya tha. Wo bhi Maravi aur
apni behan ke saamne... aur yahi sab main teri maa-behan ke sath bhi karunga aur
tujhe aise hee zinda chhod dunga marne ke liye.. waise bhi teri halat mare hue
insaan se badtar ho chuki hai..."
"heard of brains...? Brains are awesome, i wish.. you had one..."
Daddu ki baate mere dimag ki taar hila chuki thi... yadi wo salaankho ke us par na
hokar... is paar hota toh main use jaan se hee maar deta. Par aisa tha nahi isliye
aisa sochne me maine jyada waqt barbad nahi kiya...
main yaha aaya toh Daddu ko hilane tha par Daddu ne ulta mujhe hee hila ke rakh
diya tha...
.
"Tu mere khandan ko khatm karne ki sirf baate kar sakta hai... lekin main sach me
tera khandan khatm karne wala hoon... isiliye toh maine sabse pahle tujhe raaste
se hataya... Ab tera bhai... behan.. tera pura khandan vulnerable hai... unhe
maarne me mujhe jyada mushqil nahi hogi... jiske baad main Esha ke khandan ka
number lagaunga... aur phhir apne khandan ka... tujhe mere maa-baap ya bade
bhai se badla lene ki zaroorat nahi hai... unhe main khud maarne wala hoon aur ye
sab karne ke liye mujhe teri jaisi nangayi chodne ki zaroorat nahi hai... tu bas
dekhta jaa... kuch din baad Maravi ki maut ki khabar ke sath main khud yaha
aaunga... main tujhe dikhaunga ki main kya hoon... the name is Arman... Arrogant
Reputed Man.... Remember it.. brit."
.
Main waha se muda aur jaane laga... lekin mere dimag ke taar ab bhi hil rahe the.
Main waha se bahar jaane laga...
"Tujhe lagta hai ki tu mujhse jeet chuka hai...? Pahle khud ko dekh ek baar... thik se
chal bhi nahi sakta aur mere khandan ko khatm karega... mujhse badla lene ke liye
tune zindagi bhar ke liye khud ko apahij banana swikar kar liya.. abhi toh tujhe
lag raha hai ki tu ye sah lega... par baad me tu royega... sochega ki tujhe aisa nahi
katna chahiye tha. Abhi tujhe hosh aaye hue din hee kitne hue hai. Ab Koyi jhat
barabar launda bhi tujhe pel sakta hai aur tu zameen par kutto ki tarah pada
gigiyata rahega... bahut maza aayega tujhe maarne me.... "
"Destiny will serve you... but are you prepared for the worst. Goodbye..
madarchod... Daddu... Aaj teri maa-behan ko imagine karke mutth marunga...
waise teri behan zinda hai na abhi..? Main bhi use baandh kar hafto chodunga...
Sala maza hee aa jayega..."
.
***Phase-2 Ended***
Chapter-37: Flipside
Chapter-34: Flipside
436
Update-144
Daddu se ... yani Gautam ke sage uncle se milne ke baad main seedhe E-5 ke liye
ravaana hua. Apne flat ke gate ke paas pahuch kar maine ek nazar E-4 par dali...
Aur jaldi-jaldi ye socha ki ab mujhe kya karna chahiye... mere paas is samay do
options the. First, ye ki main seedhe apne flat me ghus jaun ya phhir Rathi se
milkar apni naukari ke baare me kuch puchhu ki... kya re Randi.. Main ab bhi
Sharda Enterprises ka employee hoon ya chod diya mujhe... ??
.
Main bahut confuse ho raha tha ki kaun sa option choose karu... first ya second...
aur jab ye confusion door nahi hua toh maine ek teesara option create kiya jisme
both (a) & (b) tha. Yani main pahle apne room me gaya... hath-muh dhoya...
kanghi-vanghi mar ke.. perfume vagerah dal ke... Rathi darling ke flat ke liye
nikla... is dauran mujhe wo kayi pal yaad aaye jab mere hath-pair ekdum sahi-
salamat the... jab main raat-o-raat, kisi bhi waqt VR ke ghar me boundary kood
kar chala jata tha. Jab main raat-raat me Rathi ke flat me ghuskar mutth mar deta
tha... Wo bhi kya din the.....
.
"Arrrmaaaaann... tum... "thoda khush, thoda aashcharya-chakit, thoda utsah ke

sath Rathi ji boli... jiske baad maine bhi thoda khush, thoda aashcharya-chakit aur
thoda utsahit hokar jawab diya...
"Abhi tak toh main hee hoon... aage pata nahi.."
"I knew, god would protect your sense of humour. Come inside..."saamne gate se
hat-te hue Vandana mam haste hue boli par phhir turant peechhe mudi....
"do you mind taking off your shoes, i just cleaned and mopped the floor and I want
to keep them clean... thank you . i really appreciate it. "
"Toh behanchod iske liye... itna engliah chodne ki kya zaroorat thi... seedhe-seedhe
do shabd me bol deti ki... Jute Utaro..."bahar shoes utarte hue maine mann me
kaha....
"Maine suna tumhare baare me... aur jo suna, jo dekha... uske liye unexpected
word bhi kafi expected hai... matlab ek raat... achanak se police ka pura kafila
tumhare ghar pahucha... unhone tumhe arrest kiya par phhir do din baad pata
chala ki tum police ke sath milkar kaam kar rahe the aur is shehar ke sabse bade
gunde ko police tumhari vazah se pakad payi..."
"Ye kya news me chhapa tha...? Phhir toh meri photo bhi aayi hogi..."
.
"Nahi... tumhare baare me toh koyi jaanta bhi nahi... par police dwara ek letter
Sharda Enterprises me aaya tha.. jisme explain kiya gaya tha ki hum kyu tumhe
naukari se na nikale..."
"Matlab main ab bhi aapka employee hoon..."

437
"Obviously..."
"Annual day nikal gaya... ? Kaisa tha..."
"Well, party was good but i dont want to hurt your feelings by telling you more
about annual day.. "
" dont worry, I dont mind anything.. and i always miss the most destined party of
my life..."sadak par parabolic curve banate samay main jaise pelaya tha us scene
ko yaad karte hue maine kaha aur kuch der usi scene me raha... matlab chup-chap
apne ateet me
"I gotta go now..."thodi der baad maine hee kaha... "Main apna resignation email
kar dunga...."
"Tum resign... karrr... rahe ho.. Kyuuun.. "chauk kar Vandana Rathi boli "tumne
shayad thik se suna nahi... Police ka letter aaya tha Sharda Enterprises me jisme
unhone kaha tha ki..."
"Mera kaam ab yaha khatm ho chuka hai, isliye yaha jyada din rukne ka koyi
matlab nahi.."VR ko beech me rok-kar maine kaha
"needless to say, but I always knew, you don't give a damn for this job and as far as
my guess is correct you didnt come here in search of job. All this was a way to make
your agenda successful... and now that... your undercover thing with police has
worked... i dont think, you will do it more.. so why leaving.."
.
Vandana Rathi ke is sawal ka kya jawab dena maine thik nahi samjha.. kyunki
main use batata bhi toh kya... Ki.. Ab main apna baki bacha badla lunga ? isliye VR
ke is sawal par maine sirf apni million dollar wali smile di aur stick ke bharose
dheere-dheere waha se bahar jaane laga... par mujhe mere aur Vandana Rathi ke
beech ka ye conversation thoda adhoora-adhoora sa laga... mujhe yaad hai ki last
time jab main Rathi ke yaha aaya tha toh bahut bada kaand kiya tha aur toh aur...
wapas jaate samay koyi dialogue bhi mara tha... yahi sab sochte hue main gate tak
pahucha....
" i did not get the chance to say sorry for that night.... that night means that...
night..... i'm sorry..."
"I know... you wanted to get fired... that was your plan..."
"Plan... nah... i just wanted to fuck you that night.. Good Night"
.
.
Us din ganga-jamuna ke kand ke baad meri puri zindagi badal gayi.. pahle aksar
Daddu aur NH-6 me loot karne ke baare me sochna padta tha... par ab ye dono
mamle salat gaye the. Waise bhi ab main physically itna saksham nahi tha ki..
waisa kuch kar saku. Par phhir bhi mujhe ab bhi yaha bahut kuch karna tha...
mujhe Nisha aur David se apna badla lekar jald se jald... Gautam aur Esha ke
khandan ko marna tha. Main, Nagpur jis kaam ke liye aaya tha... wo kaam pura
438
ho chuka tha. Halaaki uski bahut bhari kimat mujhe chukani padi... jiski maine
parikalpana nahi ki thi... main yaha se aaj Daddu se milne ke baad hee chala jata
par Angelina darling se hui meri aaj ki mulaqat ne mere kadam wapas nagpur me
jama diye the... jiske baad abhi khali time me jab maine mujhse doglayi karne walo
ke baare me socha toh paya ki Nisha aur David ko bhala main kaise chhod sakta
hoon... un dono ne bhi toh mere sath wahi kiya... jo college time me Gautam aur
Esha ne kiya tha... toh kyun na jab tak Nagpur me hoon in dono ka game baja
doon...
.
"Nisha..? Use kyu taad raha hai ? Waise bhi yadi Nisha aur David ko kuch hua
toh... Police sabse pahle tere paas aayegi..."2.0 ne apna dimag yani mera dimag
lagate hue kaha...
"Pahli baar me jab lund nahi ghusta toh chudayi band toh nahi kar dete... dobara
lund ghusate hai na…waisich, Nisha bhi first time bach gayi thi… lekin abki baar
ekdum nishane me aisa lund ghusaunga ki... zindagi bhar dard dega aur rahi baat
police ki toh... Police na toh pichhali baar kuch ukhad payi thi aur na hee abki baar
kuch ukhad payegi... next mission activated.. maza aayega, Nisha ki ek aur baar
gand maarne me... bc bahut role de rahi thi... aur wo lawde ka baal, David...
maaaadhaaaarchod... mujhe naukari dene wala tha... lawda mujh jaise param
gyani ko newton kaku ka rule explain kar raha tha... abhi main usko batata
hoon....."
"Ho jaye fir... par police ko sambhalne ki jimmedari teri..."
"Done..."
"Wait... Kahi ye sab 5th dimension wala toh nahi karwa raha..."
"No one can defeat me... unless i allow them..."
"Then let's go..."
"Abhi.... ? Itti raat me...? Pagal hai kya..."
"Kabira sir ka fan hoon main... kal kare so aaj kar........"
"Chal phhir.. waise bhi... tujhe kya... chalna toh mujhe hai. Uske ghar tak jaane me
hee aadha ghanta lag jayega... madarchod police wale... lund me goli maar dete,
pair me kyu mara..."stick ke sath cigarette ka packet uthakar maine kaha...
" ab toh lawda cigarette jalane ke liye bhi deewar par tik kar khada rahna padta
hai... Ki.. Kahi gir na jaun..."
Update-145
Main apne room se nikla... park cross kiya... apna purana flat cross kiya, jaha ab
Varun aur Sonam rahte the... un dono ne toh ab tak shadi bhi kar li hogi, aisa
maine andaza lagaya....

439
"Mere sath... rahne wale... kaha se kaha pahuch gaye... ab Varun ko hee le lo...
mere muqabale tha hee kya wo... aisa bhi nahi hai ki mera background kamzor
raha ho.. mere paas bhi wo sab tha... jitna uske paas tha. Balki wo toh ekdum dhor
tha school me... aise kayi example hai... kaise-kaise chutiya log kaha pahuch
gaye... koyi lawda jhat sa dikhne wala... maal-e-maal pataye pada hai toh koyi
betichod... foreign me naukari kar raha hai.... koyi behan ka lawda netagiri me
utar gaya toh koyi business wagerah karne laga.... mujhe lagta hai... main hee bas
ek defaulter hoon... khali... movies ki baat kar lo..."
"Kya kaam hai..."mere chintan me vighna daalkar ek aadmi ne mujhse puchha...
"Tujhe kyun batau be... ki mujhe kya kaam hai... chal hatt saamne se..."use dhakka
dekar maine kaha... jiske baad usne mujhe pakda aur mujhe dhakka dekar girane
ki bajay wahi ek chair par bithaya....
"Tu naya hai.. isliye mujhe nahi jaanta... Nisha meri maal hai..."
Jis par Nisha ke ghar ka guard mujhe ghoorne laga... ghoorne kya, apna daant
peesane laga...
"Matlab ex-maal.."apna jawab update karke maine kaha...
"Main yaha 5 saal se kaam kar raha hoon... Nisha madam ke ghar aane wale sabhi
doato ki shakl mujhe yaad hai... tumhe toh kabhi nahi dekha..."
"Kyunki main din ke ujaale me nahi... balki raat ke andhere me aane wala dost
hoon...”
is par wo mujhe aur jyada ghoorne laga
“abey.. teri madam ka affair tha mere sath... ek saal tak. Affair matlab samajhta
hai na... nahi... ? Affair... Affair matlab... gupt yaun sambandh jisme salagna
vyakti se sabandhit logo ko kuch bhi pata nahi hota... waise… main jab-jab yaha
aaya... teri jagah koyi aur tha..."
"Pee rakhi hai... kya... pichhale 5 saal se main yaha sikorti ka kaam kar raha hoon
aur... main kar raha hoon matlab sirf main hee kar raha hoon..."
"Phhir wo dusara kaun tha... jise maine dekha tha..? Anyway.. let me go
innnn.."khade hote hue maine kaha... par usne phhir se mera hath pakda aur
mujhe wahi baitha liya...
"Ye kahi gay toh nahi hai.."use upar se neeche dekh kar maine socha... par tabhi
Nisha ke bunglow ka bada sa darwaja khula...Darwaja khulte hee wo guard ekdum
se salute marne wali position me khada ho gaya...
"Arey baith lawda... in jhataho ko izzat dene ki zaroorat nahi hai..."

.
Nisha ke ghar se char log bahar nikle... Varun.. Sonam.. David aur Nisha...
"now, dont be stranger.."Nisha ke gaal par fake kiss karte hue Sonam boli... jiska
jawab Nisha ne same fake kiss se diya...

440
"ye sale, zaroor andar group me bf dekh rahe the... tabhi Sonam aur Nisha me abhi
tak josh hai... waise… ek baar Nisha ko bf dekhkar kya choda tha..."
Wo charo haste hue, ek-dusare se baat karte hue gate ki taraf aa rahe the. Jaise-
jaise wo mere taraf aaye... un dhokhebazo ki tasveere andhere me clear hone lagi...
maine Nisha ko dekha...
"Sahi bolte hai log ki breakup ke baad ladkiya mast dikhne lagti hai... iska toh
pura look hee change ho gaya… jab ise marunga toh bura toh bahut lagega... par
kar bhi kya sakte hai... patthar me dil rakh ke marunga… ise"
“dude, it’s… dil me patthar.. not patthar me dil…”
“chup be… maine jo kaha, mera wahi matlab hai… dil me patthar rakhna…. yani..
majboori aur patthar me dil rakhna yani.. mazbooti…. ”
.
"Amaru, ye kaun hai..."Nisha meri taraf ungali dikhakar guard se puchhi aur apna
baal peechhe karne lagi...
"Koyi bhikhari lagta hai..." Sonam boli...
"Toh kya ye koyi langar hai... jo yaha baitha rakha hai ise... bhaga yaha se
isko..."uchi aawaz me David ne bhi mujhpar hath saaf kiya... jise follow karte hue
ant me Varun bola...
"David, Aise logo ke toh muh hee nahi lagna chahiye... kuch kaam-dham toh karna
hai nahi... bas zaroorat padne par dusaro ke saamne hath failana bas aata hai...
aise logo ko inke maa-baap ghar se nikal dete hai... lekin phhir bhi inke bhuse
bhare dimag me kuch nahi jata... inhe sirf ek hee kaam aata hai... wo hai.. bheekh
magna.. Amaru, ise bahar kar... aur yadi na jaye toh police ko call kar dena..."
Maine un sabki puri baat suni... un charo ne mujhe bahut jaleel kiya... main bahut
jala bhi par phhir maine apni billion dollar smile dete hue un charo se kaha...
"… Madarchodoo.... "
Aur mera itna kahna hee tha ki Varun... David aur Amaru mujhpar toot pade...
mujhe toh ye bhi nahi dikha ki iske baad hua kya... mujhe unhone pakda...
dhakela... neeche giraya aur ghaseet-kar security guard wale room me band kar
diya aur us room ki light band kar di…
“come on… Arman.. You’re DareDevil… sense the things”us andhere kamre me
idhar-udhar hath-pair marte hue maine kaha…
jiska darwaja phhir police ne khola...

.
"Yahi hai kya..."hawaldar ne baharwalo se puchha...
"Ab jab andar main hoon toh main hee na rahunga... hahaha..."police wale par
haste hue maine kaha "akhand chutiya hai be tu.."
441
"Mujhe gali deta hai..."
"Gali toh main tere us T.I. Madhure ko bhi de chuka hoon.. NH-6"hint dete hue
maine kaha... par us hawaldar ne hint nahi liya balki mujhe lekar seedhe police
station aa gaya...
.
Maine us hawaldar se kayi baar kaha ki main police ka hee aadmi hoon... main
Madhure aur Shriwas dono ko jaanta hoon... lekin us hawaldar ne meri jhat ek bhi
nahi suni aur jeep me baithakar thane le ja patka... sath me usne David ko bhi
thane me bulaya... jispar, David ke sath Nisha bhi thane tak aayi.... aur uske baad
David ne call karke Sonam aur Varun ko bhi thane bula liya...
.
"Us hawlu ne bulaya sirf ise tha.. tum kyun aa gayi... ? Itna pyar... meri toh aankhe
hee bhar aayi..."thane me maine Nisha se kaha...
"Main tumhe jaanti hoon ?"mujhe dekh kar Nisha puchhi... ab wo har second-do
second ke baad mujhe dekh rahi thi.... matlab ek taraf wo mujhse puchh rahi thi ki
kya wo mujhe jaanti hai... toh wahi dusari taraf wo waisi harqat kar rahi thi...
jaisi harqat usne tab ki thi.. jab main us-se first time mila tha...
kabhi-kabhi aisa hota hai ki ekich nazar me saamne wala achanak se pasand aa
jata hai.. phhir wo chahe kaisa bhi ho. Par mere case me aisa nahi tha... Nisha ne
pahle mujhe park me basketball khelte hue dekha tha.. phhir church ke bahar
cigarette peete hue aur phhir park me shant baithe hue... jab main us-se first time
mila tha tab wo aise hee mujhe har minute-do minute me palat-palat ke dekh rahi
thi aur aaj bhi same scene repeat ho raha tha...
"Kahi toh dekha hai, ise... David ?"
"Kahi aur bheekh magte hue dekha hoga.... in logo ka ek pura network hee hota
hai... abhi yaha kuch der toh kuch der baad kahi aur... aise log hee bheekh magne
ke bahane ye dekhte hai ki kiska ghar khali hai aur phhir chori karte hai... ye hai
toh bhikhari.. par main sure hoon ki iske jeb me iske haisiyat se jyada ka mobile
hoga... ye in logo ko pahchan-ne ka sabse aasan tareeka hai..."beech me apni pond
ghusedte hue Sonam boli…..
"Bhikhari nahi lag raha mujhe... thik se dekh.."bade gaur se dekhte hue Nisha ne
kaha...
"Bhagwan se toh dar, Sonam. Kis angle se tujhe main bhikhari lag raha hoon.. bc
bhikhari woodland ka shoes pahanta hai kya...."
Par hawaldar ne meri ek na suni aur meri taalashi lene laga… taalashi lene ke
baad hawaldar ne mere jeb se mera mobile nikal kar Sonam ki baat confirm karne
laga...
"Dekha.. maine kaha tha na... dekha, kitna mehanga mobile rakha hai..."

442
"Abeyyy.. tumhariiiiiii... wo isliye kyunki main bhikhari nahi hoon... akhand

chutiyapa macha rakha hai, tum logo ne... abey main Sharda Enterprises me job
karta hoon aur E-5 me rahta hoon.. yakin na aaye toh Mere manager Vandana
Rathi ko phone karke puch lo aur tu.. mera mobile wapas kar.. galti se koyi button
daba dega toh kahi Sidharth Singh Bairangi ko call na lag jaye..."
"Tu Bairangi sir ko jaanta hai..."Varun ne chauk kar puchha..
"He's my fan..."
"Maine zaroor tumhe kahi dekha hai..."Nisha phhir boli...
"silly girl… teri inhi harkato ki vazah se maine tujhe chhoda tha. Sala... sar pe chot
mere lagi aur yaddasht in logo ki chud gayi... ya phhir natak pel rahe hai..." apni
aankhe mijte hue maine socha..
"Maine bhi ise kahi dekha hai.." Nisha ke baad wahi paas me khade ek hawaldar ne
bhi meri oor dekh kar kaha...
"Tune toh mujhe yahi dekha hoga be... kuch hafte pahle yahi toh tha main... yaad
kar kaise kuch nahi ukhad paye the tum log mera aur phhir Daddu ko pakadwaya
tha maine..."
"Ammraaan.. hai na.."
"Bitch please..."
"Arman...?"
" ye ho kya raha hai..... iska jo bhi naam ho, ye Amran ho ya phhir Arman… FIR
darj karo iske naam..."David pura jor dekar bola...
"F.I.R. ? itni bhi jaldi kya hai..."thane me entry marte hue Shriwas ek hawaldar se
bola "wo Khatik ki illegal daru bhatti wale case ki file lana toh... jisme wo bach
nikla tha..."
Shriwas ko waha dekh mujhe thodi rahat mahsoos hui aur main ekdum se seena
taankar khada hua... matlab khade hone ki koshish ki…
"Ab tune kya kiya..."
"Kuch nahi... bawle ho gaye hai ye charo... purani baat ka badla le rahe hai... bolte
hai ki mujhe jaante hee nahi.. aur ulta chor bol rahe hai.."
"Tujhe hum sach me nahi jaante aur teri hasiyat bhi nahi ki tujhe hum
jaane..."David gurrya "inspector, F.I.R. likho.."
"Really...? i mean.. really...? tum yaha aaoge aur chilla kar mujhe bologe ki F.I.R.
likho..."
"Kisi ke ghar me bina jaan-pahchan ke koyi kaise ghus sakta hai... phhir isne hum
sabko abuse bhi kiya..."
443
"Aap Nisha Desai ho na... kuch hafto pahle main tumse mila tha.."
"Haan... kisi Arman name ke shaks ke baare me puchhne ke liye ki... kya main use
jaanti hoon.. ohhhhh my god..... oh my god... oh.my.god ab mujhe yaad aaya ki
maine tumhe kaha dekha hai... ye Inspector tumhari photo lekar mere paas aaye
the.. wahi maine tumhe dekha tha. Par tab tumhare chehre me ye nishan nahi tha...
ye nishan kaise laga..."
" abeyyy… tumhariii…. mere se pahle tum log apna ilaaz karwao be... akhand
chutiyapa pel rakha hai..."apna sar mijate hue maine kaha..."sala tum logo ki baat
sunkar mere dimag me heart attack aa gaya..."
"Toh aap ise nahi jaanti..."Shriwas ne meri taraf ishara karke Nisha ne puchha..
"No... never.."
"Aur isne kiya kya..."
"Main batata hoon ki isne kya kiya..."Nisha kuch bolti uske pahle hee David ne
bolna shuru kar diya... par jaise David beech me tapka tha waise Shriwas bhi
beech me tapak gaya...
"Aap rahne do.. Nisha ji… aap boliye, please..."
" main.. my fiance, David.. my best friend Sonam and her fiance, Nishad..."
"Uska name Nishad nahi... Varun hai…. lodh.. Mere bachpan ka dost... Ye log
jhooth bol rahe hai... aadhar card check karo uska…"
"I see that something bothering you. Take a deep breath and please, shuuut up"
mujhe chup karate hue Nisha boli..
.
Ek toh main pahle se hee satka tha.. upar se in logo ki alag hee kahani chal rahi thi,
jo ki meri kahani se bilkul match nahi kha rahi thi. Mere sar me ek baar phhir se
dard utha aur maine chupchap wahi konte me peechhe deewar par sar tikaya aur
apni aankhe band kar li...
"Ye madarchod kuch din se naye type ka hee dard shuru hua hai... dimag ekdum
gooch-mooch ..gooch-mooch ho jata hai.. maa chudaye ye log.. thodi der so jata
hoon..."
.
"Arman... oye.. Arman.. uth.. uth… be "
"So gaya tha kya... isko pani de"
"I was taking power nap.. anyway, What happenend and what is about to
happened.."
"Nothing happened and nothing will happen... relax..."

444
Shriwas un charo ki taraf dekha aur bola..
"Toh aap charo jab Nisha ji.. ke ghar se bahar nikle toh aapne ise waha security
guard ke paas dekha.... phhir aap sabne ise bhikhari kahna shuru kar diya jiske
jawab me isne gali di.. mujhe nahi lagta ki aap logo ko ye baat aage badhani
chahiye..."
"Par is-se pahle puchho ki ye waha kar kya raha tha.. mera matlab security guard
ke paas ye kyu baitha tha..."
Shriwas meri taraf muda.. jis par maine apne kandhe uchka diye aur Shriwas ne
phhir aankho se ishara kiya ki main kuch bol du... toh maine socha ki kyun na sach
hee bol diya jaye...
"Main in charo ko maarne gaya tha aur guard mujhe andar nahi jaane de raha
tha"
Maine kaha aur un sabki taraf dekha.. kisi ko bhi mujhpar yakin nahi ho raha tha..
sab mujhe aise nafrat se dekh rahe the, jaise maine Game of Thrones ka koyi
suspence reveal kar diya ho..
"Okay... i'm a gay.. so is Nisha's Security guard.. main use us time mere sath sex
karne ke liye pata raha tha... ab khush..."
"Chhhee... yuckkk... i'm outside.."bura sa muh banakar Sonam waha se chali

gayi...
"Mera security guard gay hai... mujhe toh pata hee nahi tha "
"ek gay ko pahchan pana itna aasan nahi hai… Ek gay hee dusare gay ko pahchan
sakta hai... aur main……….. I’m a gay and I’m proud of it…"
"So khatam kare... mujhe NH-6 par round pe bhi jaana hai.."
"NH-6 me round…? dakaiti karne wala to pakda gaya tha na... Daddu name tha
uska... gun aur girl dono ki smuggling karta tha... "maine kaha aur has diya..
.
Nisha & gang waha se aise hee khali hath ravana hue.. unke jaane ke turant baad
main Shriwas se bola...
"What the fuckkk… was that... wo charo bol rahe the ki wo mujhe nahi jaante ? aur
main bata raha hu, uska name Nishad nahi.. Varun hai... uska id kyun nahi check
kiya..."
"Kyunki main use jaanta hoon..."wahi table par rakha News Paper mujhe dete hue
usne kaha... "Ganga-Jamuna ka article usi ne chhapa hai.. aankh fad ke padh le..."
"Usne apna name kab change kiya... isme toh Nishad Choudhary likha hua hai..."

445
"Same goes for Nisha.. wo bhi tujhe nahi jaanti... jab tune us din thane me kaha ki
tu khud ko pagal saabit kar dega.. jiski gawahi Sharda Enterprises ki Manager..
RVC me Rahne wale Desai ji ki beti... vagerah-vagerah log denge... tab maine iski
chhan-been ki.. main Desai ji ki ladki se mila.. tera name bataya... teri photo use
dikhayi.. par usne tujhe pahchan-ne se inkar kar diya... tune apna purana address
A-3 diya tha.. jaha Nishad rahta hai.. main waha bhi gaya aur us-se tere baare me
puchha.. par wo bhi tujhe nahi jaanta tha..."
Itna bolne ke baad Shriwas shant ho gaya aur main...? Main….. toh… pahle se hee
shant tha.. hum dono ek dusare ko tak-taki baandhe dekh rahe the.. Shriwas mujhe
chutiya samajh raha tha aur main use... hum dono ke dimag ko is waqt heart
attack aa raha tha...
.
"Dimag ghuma ke rakh diya tha tune.... ekdum khatm insaan hai be tu..."
"Bye..."stick zameen me tika kar khade hote hue maine kaha
"Teri shakl dekh ke nahi lag raha ki tu jhooth bol raha tha... 12 kyun baje hai teri
shakl me.."
"Yeeee.. ye toh.. Performance de raha hoon main... waise bhi meri hamesha se ek
philosophy hai ki... jhooth bolna buri baat nahi hai, thik dhang se jhooth na
bolna… ye buri baat hai... "bahar jaate hue maine kaha "aur mujhe maloom tha ki
uska naam Varun nahi balki Nishad hai.. wo toh main acting kar raha tha…. taaki
wo log confusiya jaye…"
.
.
"What the fuck was that... i still feel Nisha's tight ass and her vagina pulsing… how
the hell it happened and how the hell it didn’t happen"Police station se nikal kar
main khud par chillaya..
"According to current situations.. tu kabhi Nisha se nahi mila.. tu kabhi David se

anahi mila.. Sonam ka chutiyapa tere sath nahi hua aur jise tu Varun samajh raha
tha.. wo Nishad hai aur uska door-door tak tujhse koyi lena dena nahi hai..."
"Matlab ye sab mera vahaaaammm thhhaaaaa... whhhhat thheeeee fuccckkkkk

isssss happeningggg...."
meri aawaz slow hone lagi toh maine apne aas-paas dekha aur apne aas-paas
dekhkar aisa laga, jaise duniya tabah ho rahi ho.. ped-paudhe apne aap chalne
lage.. ghar toot kar phhir se banne lage.. ek pal din hota.. toh dusare pal raat.. ek
pal mujhe kadake ki thand lagti toh dusare pal pura sharir paseene me naha jata..
kabhi baarish hoti toh kabhi kuch nahi hota.. sadke apne aap chal rahi thi.. sab
kuch bahut teji se badal raha tha…. zameen upar uth rahi thi aur aasman neeche
aa raha tha.. sab aapas me mix hone laga.. ped-paudhe.. gaadiya.. sadke.. ghar..
zameen.. aasman... mera sar bahut jor se jhannaya... aur main apna sar paadkar
wahi neeche baith gaya.....
"That was a glimpse of five dimensional world... did you see that.."
446
Aawaz sunkar maine apni aankhe kholi... par saamne kuch nahi tha.. kuch nahi
matlab kuch bhi nahi… naa koyi ghar… na koyi sadak aur naa hee koyi insaan…
mere saamne is waqt sirf aur sirf… ghana andhera tha aur wo aawaz….
"That was a five dimensional world...? But how the hell i supposed to go a world..
whose channel is already closed... as you said.. "
"I was using the DMT produced in pineal gland inside your brain and guess what….
it fires the neurons.. normally, it creates hallucinations & feelings of being
separated but sometimes it allows to visit another reality.. through mind.. not
physically.."
"And what's the side effects..."jis taraf se aawaz aa rahi thi.. us taraf bhagte hue
maine puchha... main us aawaz ke peechhe kafi der tak bhagta raha jiske baad
mujhe samajh aaya ki main daud nahi raha balki tair raha hoon…
"You could become mad or you could die.. well, DMT.. alter the brain functions and
grant access to knowledge of parallel universe.. by quantum computing."
"gand maraye DMT …. you tell me, why Nisha.. David.. Sonam and Varun didnt
recognized me... were they right..? all that was just my hallucinations or..."
"they are right.. so are you.”
" how…"
" truth isn’t the truth and lie isn’t the lie……."
" do you mind explaining it again because i still don’t get why you’re saying what
you’re saying"
"i mean… All the incidents, you remember with Nisha and her friends.. that never
happened here.. that all was took place in another space-time.. i still remember the
day when you came to the Nagpur.. you're sitting in a park and Nisha came out of a
church.. sit next to you... and here you had 2 options... talk to her or just ignore
her. You did both and both created their separate space-time. You're living in that
universe.. in which you ignored her in that park... but you have the memory in
which you talked to her.. i mean… you're living in different space-time with
different space-time memory."
"The hell it is... you are saying that.. somehow.. i captured the memory from
parallel world and replaced it with my original one...okayy then.... how would you
like to suck my balls"
"The scientists of your world call it... Cross-universe energy shift. In which multiple
selves in multiple universes are affected by each other.. "
"And how the hell multiple selves affect each other.. i mean how i got the memory of
my counterpart who lives in another space-time.."
"By dimensional transformation of conciousness... DMT produced inside your

brain allowed you to jump over and experience multiple times & space... do you
447
remember your counterpart Zelja.. Zelja ? For sometimes you transferred into his
concious... the same way i did. multiple selves can affect one another.. actually,
they do... that's why sometimes we think that what's happening, is already
happened before... that's why.. sometimes you see a unknown person walking on
the road and that person seems good to you, you feel good... you seem to like that
person and on the contrary, sometimes you don't know a stranger yet you start
hating that stranger for no reason "
"Kya hai BC... Mujhe hee samajh nahi aa raha toh bakiyo ka kya hoga"jab aadhe se
adhik chiz mere upar se paar hui toh maine socha... par beizzati ke karan maine
koyi sawal nahi kiya... aur isliye bhi sawal nahi kiya kyunki mujhe pata tha ki
mujhe sirf sawal sochne ki zaroorat hai...
"Okay.. i can make it simple... your Big-bank theory supported the phenomena... in
which scientists considered univerae as a closed system.. i mean.. their is one main
universe and inside that universe, infinite sub-universes lies in different space-
time... but we, 5 dimensional people... we considered universe as a open system and
we believe that their is infinite number of universes and it recieves energy coming
from outside... i mean… from other universes... we believe that, universe in which
we live is not the only one out there... infact, our universe is just one of an infinite
number of universes... making up a multiverse. To understand it... consider space-
time goes on forever, then it must start repeating at some point, creating another
universe in another space-time..."
"Then why.. we, i mean... we… i mean… weeee… 3-dimensional people haven’t
encountered any of the these universes...."
"Because you haven't looked far enough... if you look far enough, you would
encounter another version of you- in fact, infinite versions of you... in which some
of the Armans will be doing exactly what are you doing right now, while others
not... some Armans love Esha the same way you do... while some hate her... and in
one of these worlds, Esha would be dying to get you... or in one of these… you don’t
even know her… your universe is just a small bubble in a vast sea of space and that
space contains other bubbles too… i mean… other universes or worlds.. i'm sure
there would be also some worlds where humanity is no more but it still exists"
"You said.. our memories travel from one universe to another universe by some
kind of energy shift... in which, respective universe recieves energy from another
universe..."
"Yesss.."
"Then how these energy select the target universe among the multiverse.. i mean…
how, the memories of that Arman, who talked to Nisha in that park... transferred in
me... who ignored her..."
"By Telepathy and Brainwaves... "
"by telepathy… ? seriously…? one universe to another universe by telepathy…"
"i don’t think you know very much about telepathy… and yesss… by Telepathy.
Telepathy is not affected by contraints of time and space... Telepathy often found
448
between twins. They transfer information... thoughts.. thinkings from one side to
other side through brainwaves or atleast, they feel this connection and it happenes
because of brainwaves with similar transmission and reception mechanism...
that’s how you connected to Zelja and the other Arman.. who that day talked to
Nisha in that park... that's how i get connected to my counterparts in multiverse...
I, you and all my counterparts in multiverse are similar to each other in terms of…
of our biological body structure. Our brainwaves more likely to have consistent
transmission and reception mechanism.. this forms a channel, which connects all
the selves in multiverse just like multiple computers are connected with a
transmission line. It's what we call.. cross-universe energy transfer system"
"do me a favour for a favour… make me 5 dimensional and i'll reopen the channel
to your home... "
"I'll do it.. if you make trees to see the wold.."
"I can’t… i mean… they can’t.. they aren’t meant to see things or hear things.."
"Same answer.. i can’t make you 5 dimensional and you can’t become 5
dimensional... you can’t even see the fifth dimension(hyperspace/Shrinkage)…. 3-
dimensional people are not conscious to see the fifth dimension... you can learn
about it.. you can think about it.. but you can’t visualize it.."
"But i've seen the 5th dimension.. that shrinkage... a while ago.. am i transferring
into higher dimension...?"
"That wasn’t you.. that was my conscious and because of it…. now, you can
visualize the 5th dimension.. as you've seen it through me..."
"What is happening... i feel gooch-pooch.. gooch-pooch.."
"You're in the bottom of space.. now you're going to your world... i mean your
universe..."
"Why you answered my all questions..."
"What do you think... from where you get the quality of showoff..? I get bored in
nano seconds and most important... i wanted you to believe me.. it makes me easier
to kill you... See you Later, Alligator.."
"See you Later.................... Traitor..."

.
Aur phhir ek baar phhir wo sab hua.. phhir se kayi chize mix hui.. aur phhir se
main chillaya..... par abki baar khush hokar
"Maza aa gaya... mood fresh ho gaya behanchod.."hawa me gand-fad uchak kar

maine kaha aur seedhe sadak ke kinare zameen me gira... jiske baad main apna
pichhwada malte hue khada hua ki tabhi mere saamne koyi anjaan shaks aa
gaya...

449
"Chal be baju hatt... you, 3-dimensional ordinary people..."saamne wale aadmi se

maine kaha... jispar wo mujhe ghoorne laga...
"Nikal le lawda.. warna har ek universe me dhoondh-dhoondh kar marunga..."
"Pagal hai kya..."
"Chal bhag lawda... apne se kam smart logo se toh main baat hee nahi karta... sale
3 dimenson wale log"
.
.
Toh kahani ye thi ki Nisha aur Varun ka pura chapter... real toh tha.. par real nahi
tha.. mera matlab main ise puri tarah jhooth bhi nahi kah sakta aur na hee sach..
kyunki…
"truth isn't truth and lie isn't lie.. that’s the concept of multiverse "
.
.
"Dr. Angelina Silva, Nagpur" room pahuchkar maine apna lappy khola aur
Angelina ko online dhoondhane laga...
Kyunki mujhe pakka yakin tha ki jab Bairangi kisi doctor ko personally bulayega
toh wo Doctor toh normal hogi nahi... matlab kafi famous hogi aur famous logo ko
dhoondhna jyada mushqil nahi hota...
"Dr. Angelina Boaz.. isme toh Boaz likha hai.. meri wali toh Silva hai.... aur koyi
doctor ka name bhi nahi aa raha... Angelina Silva hee toh Angelina Boaz nahi... ?
Photo bhi nahi hai sala... ek minute..... Bairangi ke yaha jab main aaj gaya tha tab
wo mujhe bata raha tha ki uski biwi ka ilaaz karne wale Doctor ka name Doctor
Boaz aur....... jiske baad, maine kaha tha ki... i'm not interested, mujhe sirf Daddu
se milna hai... Bairangi ne Boaz ka naam liya tha, jiske baad Angelina mujhe waha
dikhi... aur yaha screen par Angelina Boaz likha aa raha hai.. yani Angelina Silva
hee Angelina Boaz hai aur usne apna surname change kiya... matlab uski shadi ho
chuki hai... maza aayega.. main hamesha se kisi shadi-shuda aurat ko chodna
chahta tha aur Angelina se better option toh koyi ho hee nahi sakta tha... ek toh
umra me 4-5 saal badi.. upar se famous doctor.. highly successful... matlab perfect
item.... ."
Maine Angelina ka address, clinic address, jis hospital me wo doctor thi.. waha ka
address yaad kiya aur bistar par letkar Angelina ko sochte hue mutth marne
laga....
"So, what about Nisha & Co. Shouldn’t we make plans to kill them..?"
"You didn’t hear 5D-man.. ? I'm not the one who talked to Nisha in that park.. i'm
the one who ignored her... tabhi main sochu ki main itna burchatta kaise ho gaya...
balki main toh wo hoon.. jisne us dusare universe me rahne wale Arman ka
breakup karwa diya... lodh.."
"Tune karwa diya..?"

450
"Matlab 5D-man ne kaha toh ki main wo brainwaves ke through different space-

time me tha.. yani us space-time me yani dusare universe me Nisha ke sath us
universe ke Arman ke jo sambandh kharab hue.. wo meri vazah se hue.. meri
conscious ke karan hue.. "
"Toh phhir jab tu waha tha toh yaha actual me kya huaaa……....."
"Nisha ke sath mere chakkar ko blank kar de.. baki Daddu wala matter waha bhi
raha hoga.. kyunki main Nagpur aaya hee isiliye tha... matlab ye samajh ki mujhe
mutth marna tha.. ek me maine baye hath se mara aur ek me daye hath se… lekin
mutth mara zaroor… ab mutth ko Daddu se replace kar de… clear…….?"
" ab aage kya.... Nisha & Party ko maarna hai ya... chale apni karmbhoomi... Esha
se mile bahut din ho gaye. Is halat me toh wo pahchanegi bhi nahi..."
"Kuch din baad chalte hai..."
"Angelina...?..?"
"Oh teri...."
"Kya hua..."
"Isiliye Angelina mujhe nahi pahchan payi..."
"ab nahi…. abhi nahi"
"Kyunki main us-se kabhi mila hee nahi.. ye bhi kisi dusare universe me hua hoga..
jo ki brainwaves ke through mere yaddasht me shamil ho gaya... warna....... iska
matlab mujhe jo meri zindagi yaad hai, wo purely... surely ... meri nahi hai... ye
actual me multiverse me hue incident ka combination hai... jaise.. yaha maine NH-
6 aur Ganga-Jamuna me kand kiya... aur Nisha ko kisi aur universe me mere
counterpart ne pataya hoga.. par brainwaves ke through humari memory mix ho
gayi yani yaha ki memory waha aur waha ki yaha... ab samajh me aaya pura
khel... Mandela Effect bolte hai ise... "
"one more…. suck"
" mujhe jagah ka naam nahi maloom.. par ek baar pata nahi koyi programme tha
ki kya tha…. waha baithe logo se Nelson Mandela ke baare me puchha gaya.. jinme
se lagbhag 20 logo ka ye manna tha ki Nelson Mandela ki death 1980 me ho chuki
hai.. jabki us samay Nelson Mandela jinda the.. sab un 20 logo par hasne lage.. ki
kitne gadue insaan hai. GK kitna weak hai. Par jab unka background check kiya
gaya toh wo bade-bade turramkhan nikle... phhir wo Nelson Mandela ke baare me
kaise galat ho gaye.. yahi nahi, unhone ye bhi bataya ki Nelson Mandela ki maut
kaise hui... surprisingly, un sabki story match kar gayi.. jiske baad ye niskarsh
nikala gaya ki unki conscious us parallel dimension me rahi hogi, jaha Nelson
Mandela 1980 me plane crash me mar gaye ya phhir memory mixing... that's the
Mandela effect.. in simple language..."

451
"Matlab, Angelina tere se kabhi nahi mili.. phhir toh teri college life me.... main kya
bolta hoon.. maa chudaye, ye chhote log.. apan , apni karmbhoomi chalte hai aur
Waha chalkar clear kar lete hai ki actual me kya hua tha.. kya pata koyi aur hee
fascinating story mile.."
"Angelina se milna hai.. "
"Chal chhod na.."
"Chup be.. itne update intezaar kiya hoon.. aiwe hee jaane du kya... waise bhi mujh
jaise mutth manav ko aur kya chahiye.. log faltu me bolte hai ki meri kismat jhand
hai.. jabki, jhande toh main hee gaad raha hoon.. baki toh jhande gand me le rahe
hai... hahaha.. Angelina Silva… hold your Vagina... The Shagman is
coming.................. "
.
Iske baad maine do din kuch nahi kiya.. kahi nahi gaya aur room me pade-pade
Prison Break ke baki bache episode dekh mara... Ganga-Jamuna kand ke baad
mujhe ek fayda jo hua tha wo ye ki ab meri neend na aane ki problem ekdum se
salat gayi thi.. ulta ab mujhe har samay neend aane lagi thi.. pichhale do din me
mere andar jo badlaav hua tha wo ye ki har 2 se 3 ghante ke baad mera sar
ghoomta hai aur itni jor se ghoomta ki mujhe apne aap neend aa jati thi.. jiska
maine in do dino me ilaaz bhi dhoondh liya tha.. iska simple ilaaz tha ki har 2 se 3
ghante me ek jhapki khud se mar lo...
.
"Come on, man.. you're the only person in this world.. who have seen the 5th
dimension/hyperspace.. and you're going to that ordinary Doc..."
"Yugpurush aise hee hote hai... wo chhote se chhote logo ko bhi aage badhne ka
mauka dete hai.. phhir chahe wo apne maa-behan ko chodne wala Daddu hee kyun
na ho..... "
"You're comparing 5th dimension with Daddu... really.. ?”
"Shut up..."Memorial Hospital ki site kholte hue maine kaha "ye maine dabaya
submit key.. aur ye bheja Dr. Angelina Sillva aka Mrs. Boaz ko apna medical
record.. bas appointment de de..."
"You're totally fucked.. and still showing that..."
"I dont have time for this conversation."topi lagate hue maine kaha aur aaine ke
toote hue tukdo me se sabse bade wale tukde ko uthakar bola "mere chehre par jo
cut mark hai wo mast lag raha hai... hai na.. main faltu me tension le raha tha.. ab
toh sab mujhe dekhte hee fati me aa jayenge.. mujhe dekhte hee moot marenge..."
"Chal be, langdu-lal.."

.
Main pure din intezaar karta raha Memorial hospital ke taraf se kisi responce ka..
par jab pure din udhar se koyi responce nahi aaya toh maine raat me bhi intezaar

452
kiya.. par dusare din subah mere mobile me messege aaya ki.. Dr. Angelina Boaz ke
sath mera pahla session 11 baje se hai..
.
Maine ye messege.. messege dekhkar khush hua aur phhir confirm karne ke liye ek
aur baar ye messege dekha aur ek aur baar khush hua... par mujhe laga ki kahi ye
mera delusion vagerah na ho.. isliye maine teesari baar bhi dekha... ye sach hee
tha. Phhir ye check karne ke liye ki kahi main yani meri conscious parallel
universe me toh nahi hai... maine boundary wall ko dekha... jisme maine kal raat
Sonam ki maa ka bhosda likha hua tha...
"Confirm.. messege bhi real hai aur ye duniya bhi... ab jab main Angelina se milne
jaunga toh koyi nangayi nahi chodunga.. ek dum ek shikshit, shisht, 5-D manav ki
bhaati vyavhar karunga.. "room se bahar nikalte hue maine kaha...
"Iski maa ka... Itni dhoop ? Dahini aankh se toh abhi hee nahi dikh raha.... I hate
sun... "
.
Jab se mujhe pata chala tha ki Nisha aur Angelina mujhse kabhi nahi mili aur ye
sara khel consciousness ka hai, jisme main ek second yaha toh dusare second kahi
aur... isliye aur aage confusion na ho, isliye maine Etching Needle liya aur jaha-
jaha jata waha A letter, Etching Needle(EN) se ukerta ja raha tha.. EN, ek pen ke
mafiq, pen jitna hee bada tha.. bas fark itna tha ki body wooden thi aur nib, iron
ki... mere room se MBD Restaurant ke beech kayi ghar aaye, kayi ped aaye.. jaha
maine EN se A shabd ukerate hue MBD ki taraf badhta gaya...
"One table for one..."gate kholkar dandana ke andar ghuste hue maine kaha
"Follow me, please..."
Waiter ne mujhe ek table me bithaya aur phhir menu meri taraf khiska ke bola...
"What would you like to start with?"
"Samosa.. bana ke.. aur jab main first plate kha loon toh mujhe next plate mere
table me hona magta… ek second ka bhi interval nahi hone ka"
Maine Samose ka order diya aur phhir table par needle se A... banane laga...
kyunki parallel dimension me bhi same to same aisa hee MBD restaurant hai, jaha
main kayi baar Nisha se mil chuka hoon.. isliye ab jab bhi main yaha aaunga toh
ye mark dekh kar samajh jaunga ki main kaha hoon... par isse bhi bada sawal ya
phhir confusion ye tha ki 4.0 ke karan jo mere andar dimension travel karne ki
ability aa gayi hai…. ye kab se chal raha tha..? Mujhe toh zara sa andaza tak nahi
tha. Tabhi mere mobile me alarm baja.. maine alarm off kiya, apni gardan peechhe
ki aur so gaya.. taaki mere dimag me kuch ghanto ke baad uthne wala dard na
uthe... actually jab se Ganga-jamuna ke kand ke baad mere jagne ki limit 2-3
ghante hee rah gayi thi.. iske baad mujhe har haal me kuch der ke liye sona hota
tha... warna mera dimag bahut tej dard deta tha.... isliye... issssllliiyyyeee....
.

453
"Dekh Arun, ye jhat... yaha aake career guidance de raha hai... do saal pahle kaise
ladki ke chakkar me college ke saamne, sabke saamne ro raha tha... "
"People judge people by their success. If you're successful, then no matter how
cheap and chutiya you are... people will admire you..."
THE END
"matlab kal yadi main bhi kamyab aadmi ban gaya toh mujhe bhi log aise hee dil
aur dimag se sunenge... "
"Aur nahi toh kya... sara khel hee kamyabi ka hai, bidu... wo bhool jayenge ki tu
wahi Arman hai.. jo nangayi choda karta tha. bewda, darua.. jaise prefix tere
naam ke aage se hat jayenge aur yadi kisi ko tere purane kand yaad bhi rahe toh
bhi kuch khas fark nahi padega... dekha kaise, baato hee baato me maine tujhe tera
past change karne ki tarqeeb bata di aur tu kaha, kal puri raat time travel through
wormhole ke baare me Sulabh Sauchalaya se bahas kar raha tha… chal, papa bol...
"
.
.
"Sir..."
"Kya hai behanchod..."jhatke se apni aankh kholte hue main badbadaya...
"Your order.."
"Thanks... par thanks kahe ka.. kaun sa tu mujhe free me serve kar raha hai... in
fact tujhe toh ulta mujhe thanks kahna chahiye… chal thank you bol.."
Mere aas-paas rahne wale log aksar mujhe pata nahi kyun ghoorte rahte hai.. ab
jaise MBD ka pura waiter samaj mujhe ghoor raha tha.. jiske baad maine waiter
samaj ko apni trillion doller smile di.. aur chammach uthakar, extra pyaj lane ke
liye kaha
"Maza aa gaya... bahut miss kiya samosa…”
Samosa khate-khate maine MBD restaurant me baithe bhookhe-nango ko dekha, jo

10 baje se hee muh faad kar yaha aa gaye the aur ek table me jakar…meri nazar
atak gayi...
"Nisha aur David... badhia hai. Main bhi yadi Pandey ji ki chhoti beti ko Vipin
bhaiya ke engagement ke dauran pata leta toh aaj main bhi uske sath kisi aise hee
restaurant me baitha hota... upar se madharchod ka 28 lacs ka package... usi ke
paise se usi ke saamne dusari maal patata..."
Samosa khate hue, Nisha ki taraf dekhte hue main Pandey ji ki chhoti beti ke baare
me soch hee raha tha ki… achanak Nisha ne meri taraf apna hath hawa me uthakar
ungaliya hawa me hilayi... yani mujhe hii... kaha.. jiske turant baad maine table ke
454
ek kone me banaye A.. ko dekha ki kahi baithe-baithe toh main parallel universe
me transfer nahi ho gaya...
"A.. toh hai, phhir ye mujhe kyun hath dikha rahi hai... yaha toh main ise jaanta
bhi nahi… matlab jaanta hoon, par naa ke barabar… "
Maine Nisha ko koyi response nahi diya… Jis par usne ek aur baar mujhe dekh kar
ungaliya hawa me firayi... jispar maine ek aur baar apne banaye nishan…A… ko
dekha aur….. Nisha aur uske agal-bagal me baithe logo ka jayja lene laga...
"Sali, mera mazak udane ki koshish kar rahi hai.. lagta hai. Yadi main responce
dunga toh iska gang jo iske agal-bagal baitha hai mujhpar hasne lagenge... par
main bhi inka baap hoon... ye mujhpar hase, us-se pahle main hee in par bematlab
ka has deta hoon.. par nahi.. mujhe khud ko mature karna hai in chhote logo ko
ignore karna hai.."
Maine Nisha ko koyi responce nahi diya, par is dauran Nisha ko barabar dekhta
raha... bahut der tak dekhta raha aur aise aankh fad-fad kar aise dekha ki David
waha se uthkar seedhe mere paas aane ko majboor ho gaya...
"Meri fiance ko kya dekh raha hai be, itni der se"
"Wo bhi toh mujhe itni der se dekh rahi hai.… itti der se" maine kaha aur samosa
khatam karne ke baad jo chatni bachi thi use plate utha kar peene laga... "maza aa
gaya bahinchod... maal dekhte hue samosa khane ka maza hee kuch aur hai..."
"Tune Nisha ko maal bola.. kyu be.."
"Maine sirf maal bola aur yaha bahut maal hai.. ho sakta hai ki main Nisha ke
bagal wali ko maal bol raha hoon ya phhir uske bagal wali ko.. ya phhir uske bagal
wali ko.. tu topic change mat kar.. topic Nisha ko tadne ka tha... Nisha ko maal
bolne ka nahi…"
"Ahhha.. haa. Haan.. tu kyun dekh raha tha meri fiance ko.. aur ye mat bolna ki wo
tujhe dekh rahi thi... kyunki wo tujhe nahi, balki tere peechhe baithe RVC me rahne
wali Mrs. Arora ko dekh kar hiii.. kar rahi thi.."
"Mrs. Arora..."peechhe palatkar maine kaha.. "hii, Mrs. Arora aaannnd... ...Miss.
Arora.. ?. right ?"
Jis par Mrs. Arora ke sath baithi Miss. Arora ne meri baat ka koyi jawab nahi
diya...
"Tu idhar dekh... udhar nahi..."mera sar pakad kar saamne apni taraf karte hue
David bola...
"Seriously..? Tu mujhse sirf isliye ladna chahta hai, kyunki maine us taraf dekha
jis taraf teri fiance baithi hui thi.. ? I mean, seriously...? Aur waise bhi main Nisha
ko nahi, balki uske peechhe wala glass art dekh raha tha.. matlab kya banaya hai..
ekdum se guch-puch.. guch-puch kar diya do-teen rang ko.. par hum dono ko pata
hai ki ye sach nahi hai.. naa toh main wo glass art dekh raha tha aur na hee Nisha
Mrs. Arora se hii.. hello kar rahi thi... kyun ?"
455
"Par tune use pahle dekha.. galti teri hai.."
"Ab choot lawde me gire ya lawda choot me, chudna toh choot ko hee hai na... same
concept aur Kya chutiyo ki tarah lad raha hai.. tu jaana bhai, apna kaam kar...."
"Behanchod langde... kya bola Nisha ke bare me..."mujhe maarne ke liye David ne
apna hath uthaya aur usi samay mujhe andaza ho gaya ki ab aage kya hone wala
hai...
David waha isiliye aaya tha.. wo us raat ka badla lene aaya tha. Par mujhe ek baat
ab tak samajh nahi aayi ki David, Varun/Nishad, Sonam mujhse pahli hee mulaqat
me kyun nafrat karne lage.. unki pelayi toh parallel universe wale Arman ne ki
thi... phhir kal raat pahli hee mulaqat me wo mujhpar kyu bhadak gaye ? Aur ye
David.. sirf itni simple si baat par mujhse ladne kyun aa gaya...
"multiple selves can affect one another.. actually, they do... that's why sometimes
we think that what's happening, is already happened before... that's why..
sometimes you see a unknown person walking on the road and that person seems
good to you, you know nothing about him yet you start feeling good... you seem to
like that person and on the contrary, sometimes you don't know a stranger yet you
start hating that stranger for no reason "
.
Maine David ka hath apni taraf aata dekh ethching needle nikala aur uske hatheli
me ghusa diya.. David jor se chillaya aur mujhe gali bakte hue jor-jor se apna hath
jhatkarne laga.. Nisha aur baki log bhi waha turant aaye... MBD ka pura staff meri
taraf dauda.. is beech mere aas-paas baithe logo ne mujhe jabarjasti pakad kar
uthaya aur wahi neeche dhakel kar, mujhe maarne lage....
.
"The hell it is... what just happened..."
"Kya matlab tera..."
"Ye sab psychological baate hai, tu nahi samjhega..... oh my physics "apni

quadrillion dollar ki smile dete hue maine kaha "grow up kiddo, ye jo tu aaj kar
raha hai na.. wo sab karke main bahut aage badh chuka hoon aur ek golden tip….
yadi kisi ko marna ho toh us-se itni jyada baat nahi karte... "
"Dar gaya salaaa... langda...hahahaha...."bolkar David hasa aur uske hasne ke

baad uske sathi bhi has pade... mujh par comment pass karne lage. Lekin maine
kuch nahi kaha.. kuch nahi kiya...
kyunki main iska nateeza dekh chuka tha. Kyunki David , Nisha, Sonam & Gang ab
wo David , Nisha, Sonam nahi the.. jo mujhse khauff khate the aur na hee ab main
wo Arman tha… meri sharirik kamjoriyo ne mere hath baandh ke rakh diye the...
khair… wo sab mera mazak banate rahe.. koyi langda bolta, toh koyi taklu.. toh

456
koyi badaurat, toh koyi chor, toh koyi tapori... ek ladki ne toh behanchod lesbo tak
bol diya...
Main wo sab sunte hue dheere-dheere exit gate ki taraf badhta raha aur is dauran
main… Nisha aur uske dosto ke bagal se bhi guzra.... toh Nisha muskurate hue boli
"I think, you ain't paying attention but my friend, Sonam just call you.. A lesbo ..
Lol ... the way, last night... you were behaving in the police station, I did not think
that you would be such a big coward.. guys, last night, he was fluttering in front of
his inspector friend but now look at him.. "
Nisha ke ye katu vachan sunkar main bahar jate hue ruk gaya... maine 2-3 lambi
saans peli aur phhir apni Quintillion dollar ki smile ke sath Nisha ke paas gaya..
paas matlab, ekdum paas...
"Listen, rich..bitch.. deep down, we both know.. you like me more than David and
You could not sleep that night because you were thinking about me. So, stop your
silly showoff... because, if abusing or leg-pulling is an art then i'm the fucking
Artist.."
Nisha ke baad main Nisha ke saheliyo ki taraf mukhatib hua... "and you all... 3-
dimensional ordinary people... first raise your dimension, then raise your voice.... .
"
"Toh aapko Doctor Angelina se milna hai.."apne computer par khat-khit khat-khit
karte hue Memorial Hoapital ke reception me baithi laundiya boli "aur aapka
name hai.. Shri Arman...... nice name... seems married... anyway, Dr. Angelina is
on second floor... "
"Thank you for…. Spending… time… with… me..." jaate hue maine kaha.. jis par wo
receptionist mujhe dekh kar thodi der tak muskurati rahi...
"Main faltu me ladkiyo ke sath vulgar hota hoon.. ladkiya toh mujhse yun hee pat
jaye..."
.
Mujhe samajh nahi aa raha tha ki main kya karu.. kya kahu. Main abhi uske
saamne baitha tha jiske liye maine na jaane kitne universe ko paar karke aaya tha.
Par haqiqat ye thi ki jiske liye main itne universe ko paar karke aaya tha.. wo
mujhe nahi jaanti thi. Maine Angelina se andar aane ke liye thik usi tarah
permission mangi, jaise school me ek bachcha class me andar aane ke liye
permission mangta hai.. phhir maine couch me baithne ke liye bhi permission
manga..
.
Angelina ka ye office kahne ko toh hospital me tha, par phhir bhi hospital ke mafiq
kuch nahi tha. Waha ghar ke mafiq sofe the.. bookshelf tha.. exercise karne ke
equipments.. traedmill vagerah the. Phhir meri nazar bookshelf ke baju me gayi..
jaha 3 alag-alag size ke microscope rakhe hue the.. jiske paas glass ki slide bhi thi...
Angelina ka office itna bada aur aisa tha jaise mano Memorial hospital ke andar ek
457
aur hospital tha.. matlab itna vishal... phhir meri nazar thoda aur door gayi, jaha
ek bed tha aur uske aas-paas duniyabhar ki boring machines... par meri nazar
deewar par likhe ek quotes par atki...
"Nothing human is alien to me..."
"Yeeeah... Yee mere type ki hai..."quote padhne ke baad maine khud se kaha aur ek-
do aur quotes padhne ki liye maine deewar par aage nazar daudayi...
"When i look at the world, i'm Pessemistic but when i look at the people, i'm
optimistic"
"Ye toh bilkul bhi meri tarah nahi hai..."

.
Main bahut der tak aise khamosh baitha raha, maine waha ki har ek chiz ko
observe kiya
"Ek ghante ke session me tumne aadha ghanta barbaad kar diya hai.. "chuppi
todte hue Angelina boli..
"Oh sorry, Doc.. main Arman..."
"I know, who you are.. but what i dont know is why you are…………. here.."
"You're a doctor, i'm a patient... "
"Ohhhk.so, What do you think about the quotes written on the wall"
"I hate them... and that's why, i'm here... i hate everyone.. everything.. even that
white pen in your table…. racist sala"
"And what about me. You hate me too..?"

.
Angelina ke is sawal par main ruka....
"keep nothing back... be straight up"

Par main ruka hee raha.. maine koyi jawab nahi diya..
"Come on, Arman... why on earth you're taking too much time to answer a simple
question.. ? you hate me or not.. ? And please, tell the truth because i have 99 ways
to know that.."
"You see, doc.. that's the problem here.. truth isn't the truth and lie isn't the lie...
what will be your reaction...if i tell you that somehow i got the ability to go in
another universe... how will you react if i tell you that i've already met you in
another world and That is how, on that day outside of Barangi's house.. when I met
you, I knew your name .. whatever I told you on that day, it was not all lies..."
"Okay..."

458
"Ye sach hai.. mere paas parallel universe me jaane ka channel hai.. par actual me
main nahi jaata.. meri consciousness travel karti hai.."
"Ookay..."
"You dont trust me.."
"I do want to trust you.. But first , you tell me how you transfer your consciousness
from one world to another... is it your some kind of genetic quality or you have any
secret appliance. Like the one..in inception movie. If yes, then please show
me."indirectly mera mazak udate hue Angelina boli..
Is session ke liye jab main apply kar raha tha tab hobby aur khali samay me main
kya karta hoon.. iska ek column tha.. jaha maine... patti khelna, watching
hollywood movies, tv series bhara tha.. aur yahi se point pakad kar Angelina ne
abhi-abhi mujhpe tanj kasa tha... maine uski taraf dekha... wo ekdum serious thi..
matlab usne abhi just mera mazak udaya par ekdum serious thi.. maine ab use
upar se neeche tak dekha aur bas dekhta raha.. bahut der tak dekhta raha.. is
dauran wo bhi mujhe dekhti rahi.. usne mujhe ratti bhar bhi disturb nahi kiya...
shayad wo mera dimag padh rahi thi.. ya phhir mujhe padh rahi thi... waise dono
same hee hai…
"Chodaaa leee.."Angelina ki aankho me aankhe dal ke maine aankho se kaha...

"choda le ek baar, aisa gand marunga ki gand se pasena nikal jayega..."
.
"DMT.."maine kaha..
"Sorry..."
"DMT... dimethyltry…. sorry, i forgot its full form but i think.. it is some kind of
liquid..”aankh mijkar jamhayi lete hue maine kaha “produced naturally in pineal
gland inside brain and in the absence of serotonin… actually, i dont have any idea,
what the hell is this serotonin... all credit goes to 4.0. so in the absence of
Serotonin… DMT fires the neurons.. which results in hallucinations and feeling of
being separated, even visiting another reality... i mean, another universe.. and
from my point of view.. DMT changes the mental channel, opening our minds to
other planes of existence... “
“DMT… Dimethyltryptamine…" ye sunte hee pata nahi Angelina ko kya josh aaya…
wo turant apni jagah se uthi aur fatak se bookshelf ki taraf gayi..
Wo bookshelf me dayi taraf.. bayi taraf… upar se neeche, neeche se upar kuch
badbadate hue kuch dhoondhne lagi... wo is ek single word DMT se itna josh me
thi.. jitna ki use Arman word sunkar hona chahiye tha... wo hadbadi me pura
bookshelf upar se neeche.. neeche se upar.. baye se daye.. daye se baye.. sab check
kar dali.. par wo jo chiz dhoondh rahi thi.. use wo nahi mila... wo ek baar mere
taraf mudi aur phhir se shelf ko upar se neeche.. neeche se upar... baye se daye..
daye se baye.. khangal dala aur tabhi waha ujjar kapde pahne hue ek aadmi
aaya...
.
459
"Angelina... chale.. we're gonna miss the movie"
"Doctor Boaz..?."us ujjar kapde pahne manav ko dekh kar maine kaha...
"No... i'm his assistant.. Angelina.. please.. time’s up"(another way)
"Time’s up..."stick zameen me tika kar main utha...
Waise toh mujhe, mere se bada ajeeb, khiska hua , satkela insaan koyi nahi lagta..
par DMT sunte hee Angelina ab jaisi harqat kar rahi thi... us-se wo ab kuch-kuch
meri tarah hee lagne lagi thi.. wo kabhi mujhe dekhti toh.. toh kabhi Dr. Boaz ke
assistant ko.. toh kabhi deewar me tangi ghadi ko... toh kabhi apne bookshelf ko..
pata nahi wo kya dhoondh rahi thi.. par mere dwara kahe gaye ek word DMT ne
mano use aise uttejit kar diya tha.. jaise wo aaj tak isi talaash me thi... usne ek aur
baar puri process repeat ki.. yani wahi.. bookshelf me upar se neeche.. daye se baye
dekhne wali process...
"When will you come next time..? i'll rearrange my schedule and yes, you were
right... i met you during camping."
Angelina ke is sawal aur is khulase par main apni sextillion dollar ki smile dete hue
khada hua aur waha se jaate hue bola...
"I'll inform you about my next session... and you, 3-dimensional ordinary
Assistant.. remember the word.. Arman.... This is the most sacred word of this
world and by chanting it twice a day... your all sins will be forgiven and you'll go
straight to the heaven.. now, get the out of my way.."
main waha se nikla aur thodi door jaane ke baad wapas palatkar, Angelina ke
office ke bahar deewar khada ho gaya… ye check karne ke liye ki… mere jaane ke
baad wo mere baare me kya baat karte hai… main kuch der wahi bahar khada
raha…
“hatt lawda…. kuch baat hee nahi kar rahe ye toh… zaroor Angelina us assistant se
chudwa rahi hogi… waise main faltu me ladkiyo ke sath vulgar hota hu.. ladkiya
toh mujhse aise hee pat jaye.."
langdate hue main waha se bahar jaane laga aur yahi dua kar raha tha ki wo
assistant mujhe kahi maarne na aa jaye... warna self defence me mujhe etching
needle seedhe uske dil me ghusani padegi...
.
Angelina ke us khulase ne ki wo mujhe pahle se jaanti hai.. mera sar ghuma diya
tha.. mera matlab maine badi mushqil se kaha-kaha ka concept lagakar situation
ko handle kiya tha aur ab wo bol rahi hai ki.. wo mujhe pahle se jaanti hai, mujhse
pahle bhi mil chuki hai par yaha sawal ye nahi hai... yaha sawal ye hai ki sawal
kya hai…. kyunki main jitne sawalo ke jawab dhoondhata hoon, unke jawab milne
se pahle yaa toh sawal badal jate hai ya darjano sawal aur jud jate hai.. i mean it
becomes deeper.. and deeper and deeper... isliye pahle sawal toh clear ho jaye…
jawab toh baad me dhoondh hee lunga…..

460
"Life is like Physics, 3.0... deeper you go, deeper it becomes and you know the
simple concept of multiverse.. actually you invented it.. truth isn’t the truth.. lie
isn’t the lie.."
.
Multiverse... pata nahi ye kab aur kaise khatm hoga aur usse bhi jyada importance
iska hai.. ki ye shuru kab hua... maine aasman ki taraf dekha.. aur dekhta hee
raha, kyunki aas-paas mauzood logo se main irritate hone laga tha.. tabhi waha
Nisha aayi aur mujhse boli...
"Why are you looking up at the sky..."
Memorial hospital se aane ke baad main apne room nahi gaya tha, balki seedhe
yahi RVC ke park me aaya tha.. main kafi din baad yaha aaya tha, jis-se park
thoda badla-badla sa lag raha tha…. pure park me jhat barabar launde idhar-
udhar daud rahe the.. wahi kuch log jogging… toh kuch aise hee group banakar
ghoom rahe the.. phhir waha kayi couples bhi the.. jo park ka kona-kona pakad kar
baithe hue the... kuch khel premi waha badminton aur basketball khel rahe the...
maine kuch der un anjaan laundo ko basketball khelte hue dekha.. jiske baad kuch-
kuch mera bhi mann hua par tabhi mera hath mere bagal me rakhi stick par gaya..
jis-se maine apna ye vichar tyag diya aur....
"Why are you looking up at sky.. "
Usi samay Nisha achanak waha aayi aur ye sawal daag di… par…? yaha toh… yani
is duniya me wo mujhse aise-kaise puchh sakti hai… yaha toh main us-se sirf do
baar hee mila hoon… ek baar thane me aur ek baar aaj subah MBD Restaurant
me…. maine park ke kayi pedo par aaj MBD Restaurant jaate waqt jo nishaan (A..)
banaya tha unhe dekha… wo nishan ab bhi un pedo par tha… yaani main apni
duniya me tha…. phhir ye… yaha… kaise……. zaroor, ye mujhe… i love you… bolne
aayi hogi….
"Why are you looking up at sky.. "Nisha ne apna sawal dohraya…
"I'm all… rumbly in my tumbly...”
“sorry… kyaaa…”
“ i mean… my stomach is growling and i want to eat a pie."
" so, you’re looking for a pie in the sky…. lol..lol..lol… what a rhyming… pie in the
sky…. lol… hahaha… hihihi… hahaha… lol.. lol”
“dekh ke… haste-haste mar mat jaana… ”
“well, you know… you never gonna get a pie in the sky…"
"i know.. but that's my desire… Eating a pie in the sky.. pie means… a good Life and
sky means… a good world.. a good life in a good world…… I’m sure, there would be
many good worlds…. anyway, why did you come here and where is your so-called
fiance and your 3-dimensional ordinary friends.... "

461
"I felt very bad about what happened in MBD Restaurant.. sorry about that.. tumhe
bahut bura laga hoga na.."
"Main bura nahi maanta...."
"Kyun..."
"You really want to know ?"septillion dollar ki smile dete hue maine Nisha ki taraf
dekha aur phhir..
"I'm sorry too.. i shouldn't have told you all that.."mere kandhe me hath rakhkar
David bola...
"Ye behanchod kaha se aa gaya.. aur mere kandhe me hath.. hath hata
madarjaat... ye shri Arman ka kandha hai, teri maa ka pond nahi, jaha tera baap
jab chahe hath maar de..."
"I said.. i'm sorry.."mera kandha thapthapate hue David muskuraya "actually
maine kuch jyada hee overreact kiya us din, raat ko… police station me aur phhir
MBD restaurant me.. "
"No worries.."
"Mere best friend Sonam ke boyfriend Nishad ka birthday hai.. tumhe aana
chahiye, bahut maza aayega.. kyun, David.. David bhi tumse yahi bolna chahta
hai.. kyun, David.."
"Ahhaan.. haa.. haa.. kyun nahi.. tumhe aana chahiye"thoda ladkhadate hue David
bola..
"I know, where is it going and what'll be the end of it.. so it'll be better if i stay
away from you…. because last time Sonam's boyfriend's birthday wasnt good
enough………. for you and your friends.. and if i accept your invitation then history
could repeat itself.. "
"Excuseeee meeee, i didn't underrrr..."
"Just trust me.. i've seen the future or you can call it, cross-universe fear transfer...
or you can think like that….that i just rejected your friend request, because you’re
not on my level….. so, bye.. ally"
matlab kal yadi main bhi kamyab aadmi ban gaya toh mujhe bhi log aise hee dil
aur dimag se sunenge... "
"Aur nahi toh kya... sara khel hee kamyabi ka hai, bidu... wo bhool jayenge ki tu
wahi Arman hai.. jo nangayi choda karta tha. bewda, darua.. jaise prefix tere
naam ke aage se hat jayenge aur yadi kisi ko tere purane kand yaad bhi rahe toh
bhi kuch khas fark nahi padega... dekha kaise, baato hee baato me maine tujhe tera
past change karne ki tarqeeb bata di aur tu kaha, kal puri raat time travel through
wormhole ke baare me Sulabh Sauchalaya se bahas kar raha tha… chal, papa bol...
"
.
.
462
"Sir..."
"Kya hai behanchod..."jhatke se apni aankh kholte hue main badbadaya...
"Your order.."
"Thanks... par thanks kahe ka.. kaun sa tu mujhe free me serve kar raha hai... in
fact tujhe toh ulta mujhe thanks kahna chahiye… chal thank you bol.."
Mere aas-paas rahne wale log aksar mujhe pata nahi kyun ghoorte rahte hai.. ab
jaise MBD ka pura waiter samaj mujhe ghoor raha tha.. jiske baad maine waiter
samaj ko apni trillion doller smile di.. aur chammach uthakar, extra pyaj lane ke
liye kaha
"Maza aa gaya... bahut miss kiya samosa…”
Samosa khate-khate maine MBD restaurant me baithe bhookhe-nango ko dekha, jo

10 baje se hee muh faad kar yaha aa gaye the aur ek table me jakar…meri nazar
atak gayi...
"Nisha aur David... badhia hai. Main bhi yadi Pandey ji ki chhoti beti ko Vipin
bhaiya ke engagement ke dauran pata leta toh aaj main bhi uske sath kisi aise hee
restaurant me baitha hota... upar se madharchod ka 28 lacs ka package... usi ke
paise se usi ke saamne dusari maal patata..."
Samosa khate hue, Nisha ki taraf dekhte hue main Pandey ji ki chhoti beti ke baare
me soch hee raha tha ki… achanak Nisha ne meri taraf apna hath hawa me uthakar
ungaliya hawa me hilayi... yani mujhe hii... kaha.. jiske turant baad maine table ke
ek kone me banaye A.. ko dekha ki kahi baithe-baithe toh main parallel universe
me transfer nahi ho gaya...
"A.. toh hai, phhir ye mujhe kyun hath dikha rahi hai... yaha toh main ise jaanta
bhi nahi… matlab jaanta hoon, par naa ke barabar… "
Maine Nisha ko koyi response nahi diya… Jis par usne ek aur baar mujhe dekh kar
ungaliya hawa me firayi... jispar maine ek aur baar apne banaye nishan…A… ko
dekha aur….. Nisha aur uske agal-bagal me baithe logo ka jayja lene laga...
"Sali, mera mazak udane ki koshish kar rahi hai.. lagta hai. Yadi main responce
dunga toh iska gang jo iske agal-bagal baitha hai mujhpar hasne lagenge... par
main bhi inka baap hoon... ye mujhpar hase, us-se pahle main hee in par bematlab
ka has deta hoon.. par nahi.. mujhe khud ko mature karna hai in chhote logo ko
ignore karna hai.."
Maine Nisha ko koyi responce nahi diya, par is dauran Nisha ko barabar dekhta
raha... bahut der tak dekhta raha aur aise aankh fad-fad kar aise dekha ki David
waha se uthkar seedhe mere paas aane ko majboor ho gaya...
"Meri fiance ko kya dekh raha hai be, itni der se"
463
"Wo bhi toh mujhe itni der se dekh rahi hai.… itti der se" maine kaha aur samosa
khatam karne ke baad jo chatni bachi thi use plate utha kar peene laga... "maza aa
gaya bahinchod... maal dekhte hue samosa khane ka maza hee kuch aur hai..."
"Tune Nisha ko maal bola.. kyu be.."
"Maine sirf maal bola aur yaha bahut maal hai.. ho sakta hai ki main Nisha ke
bagal wali ko maal bol raha hoon ya phhir uske bagal wali ko.. ya phhir uske bagal
wali ko.. tu topic change mat kar.. topic Nisha ko tadne ka tha... Nisha ko maal
bolne ka nahi…"
"Ahhha.. haa. Haan.. tu kyun dekh raha tha meri fiance ko.. aur ye mat bolna ki wo
tujhe dekh rahi thi... kyunki wo tujhe nahi, balki tere peechhe baithe RVC me rahne
wali Mrs. Arora ko dekh kar hiii.. kar rahi thi.."
"Mrs. Arora..."peechhe palatkar maine kaha.. "hii, Mrs. Arora aaannnd... ...Miss.
Arora.. ?. right ?"
Jis par Mrs. Arora ke sath baithi Miss. Arora ne meri baat ka koyi jawab nahi
diya...
"Tu idhar dekh... udhar nahi..."mera sar pakad kar saamne apni taraf karte hue
David bola...
"Seriously..? Tu mujhse sirf isliye ladna chahta hai, kyunki maine us taraf dekha
jis taraf teri fiance baithi hui thi.. ? I mean, seriously...? Aur waise bhi main Nisha
ko nahi, balki uske peechhe wala glass art dekh raha tha.. matlab kya banaya hai..
ekdum se guch-puch.. guch-puch kar diya do-teen rang ko.. par hum dono ko pata
hai ki ye sach nahi hai.. naa toh main wo glass art dekh raha tha aur na hee Nisha
Mrs. Arora se hii.. hello kar rahi thi... kyun ?"
"Ab choot lawde me gire ya lawda choot me, chudna toh choot ko hee hai na... same
concept aur Kya chutiyo ki tarah lad raha hai.. tu jaana bhai, apna kaam kar...."
"Behanchod langde... kya bola Nisha ke bare me..."mujhe maarne ke liye David ne
apna hath uthaya aur usi samay mujhe andaza ho gaya ki ab aage kya hone wala
hai...
David waha isiliye aaya tha.. wo us raat ka badla lene aaya tha. Par mujhe ek baat
ab tak samajh nahi aayi ki David, Varun/Nishad, Sonam mujhse pahli hee mulaqat
me kyun nafrat karne lage.. unki pelayi toh parallel universe wale Arman ne ki
thi... phhir kal raat pahli hee mulaqat me wo mujhpar kyu bhadak gaye ? Aur ye
David.. sirf itni simple si baat par mujhse ladne kyun aa gaya...
"multiple selves can affect one another.. actually, they do... that's why sometimes
we think that what's happening, is already happened before... that's why..
sometimes you see a unknown person walking on the road and that person seems
good to you, you know nothing about him yet you start feeling good... you seem to

464
like that person and on the contrary, sometimes you don't know a stranger yet you
start hating that stranger for no reason "
.
Maine David ka hath apni taraf aata dekh ethching needle nikala aur uske hatheli
me ghusa diya.. David jor se chillaya aur mujhe gali bakte hue jor-jor se apna hath
jhatkarne laga.. Nisha aur baki log bhi waha turant aaye... MBD ka pura staff meri
taraf dauda.. is beech mere aas-paas baithe logo ne mujhe jabarjasti pakad kar
uthaya aur wahi neeche dhakel kar, mujhe maarne lage....
.
"The hell it is... what just happened..."
"Kya matlab tera..."
"Ye sab psychological baate hai, tu nahi samjhega..... oh my physics "apni

quadrillion dollar ki smile dete hue maine kaha "grow up kiddo, ye jo tu aaj kar
raha hai na.. wo sab karke main bahut aage badh chuka hoon aur ek golden tip….
yadi kisi ko marna ho toh us-se itni jyada baat nahi karte... "
"Dar gaya salaaa... langda...hahahaha...."bolkar David hasa aur uske hasne ke

baad uske sathi bhi has pade... mujh par comment pass karne lage. Lekin maine
kuch nahi kaha.. kuch nahi kiya...
kyunki main iska nateeza dekh chuka tha. Kyunki David , Nisha, Sonam & Gang ab
wo David , Nisha, Sonam nahi the.. jo mujhse khauff khate the aur na hee ab main
wo Arman tha… meri sharirik kamjoriyo ne mere hath baandh ke rakh diye the...
khair… wo sab mera mazak banate rahe.. koyi langda bolta, toh koyi taklu.. toh
koyi badaurat, toh koyi chor, toh koyi tapori... ek ladki ne toh behanchod lesbo tak
bol diya...
Main wo sab sunte hue dheere-dheere exit gate ki taraf badhta raha aur is dauran
main… Nisha aur uske dosto ke bagal se bhi guzra.... toh Nisha muskurate hue boli
"I think, you ain't paying attention but my friend, Sonam just call you.. A lesbo ..
Lol ... the way, last night... you were behaving in the police station, I did not think
that you would be such a big coward.. guys, last night, he was fluttering in front of
his inspector friend but now look at him.. "
Nisha ke ye katu vachan sunkar main bahar jate hue ruk gaya... maine 2-3 lambi
saans peli aur phhir apni Quintillion dollar ki smile ke sath Nisha ke paas gaya..
paas matlab, ekdum paas...
"Listen, rich..bitch.. deep down, we both know.. you like me more than David and
You could not sleep that night because you were thinking about me. So, stop your
silly showoff... because, if abusing or leg-pulling is an art then i'm the fucking
Artist.."

465
Nisha ke baad main Nisha ke saheliyo ki taraf mukhatib hua... "and you all... 3-
dimensional ordinary people... first raise your dimension, then raise your voice.... .
"
"Toh aapko Doctor Angelina se milna hai.."apne computer par khat-khit khat-khit
karte hue Memorial Hoapital ke reception me baithi laundiya boli "aur aapka
name hai.. Shri Arman...... nice name... seems married... anyway, Dr. Angelina is
on second floor... "
"Thank you for…. Spending… time… with… me..." jaate hue maine kaha.. jis par wo
receptionist mujhe dekh kar thodi der tak muskurati rahi...
"Main faltu me ladkiyo ke sath vulgar hota hoon.. ladkiya toh mujhse yun hee pat
jaye..."
.
Mujhe samajh nahi aa raha tha ki main kya karu.. kya kahu. Main abhi uske
saamne baitha tha jiske liye maine na jaane kitne universe ko paar karke aaya tha.
Par haqiqat ye thi ki jiske liye main itne universe ko paar karke aaya tha.. wo
mujhe nahi jaanti thi. Maine Angelina se andar aane ke liye thik usi tarah
permission mangi, jaise school me ek bachcha class me andar aane ke liye
permission mangta hai.. phhir maine couch me baithne ke liye bhi permission
manga..
.
Angelina ka ye office kahne ko toh hospital me tha, par phhir bhi hospital ke mafiq
kuch nahi tha. Waha ghar ke mafiq sofe the.. bookshelf tha.. exercise karne ke
equipments.. traedmill vagerah the. Phhir meri nazar bookshelf ke baju me gayi..
jaha 3 alag-alag size ke microscope rakhe hue the.. jiske paas glass ki slide bhi thi...
Angelina ka office itna bada aur aisa tha jaise mano Memorial hospital ke andar ek
aur hospital tha.. matlab itna vishal... phhir meri nazar thoda aur door gayi, jaha
ek bed tha aur uske aas-paas duniyabhar ki boring machines... par meri nazar
deewar par likhe ek quotes par atki...
"Nothing human is alien to me..."
"Yeeeah... Yee mere type ki hai..."quote padhne ke baad maine khud se kaha aur ek-
do aur quotes padhne ki liye maine deewar par aage nazar daudayi...
"When i look at the world, i'm Pessemistic but when i look at the people, i'm
optimistic"
"Ye toh bilkul bhi meri tarah nahi hai..."

.
Main bahut der tak aise khamosh baitha raha, maine waha ki har ek chiz ko
observe kiya
"Ek ghante ke session me tumne aadha ghanta barbaad kar diya hai.. "chuppi
todte hue Angelina boli..
466
"Oh sorry, Doc.. main Arman..."
"I know, who you are.. but what i dont know is why you are…………. here.."
"You're a doctor, i'm a patient... "
"Ohhhk.so, What do you think about the quotes written on the wall"
"I hate them... and that's why, i'm here... i hate everyone.. everything.. even that
white pen in your table…. racist sala"
"And what about me. You hate me too..?"

.
Angelina ke is sawal par main ruka....
"keep nothing back... be straight up"

Par main ruka hee raha.. maine koyi jawab nahi diya..
"Come on, Arman... why on earth you're taking too much time to answer a simple
question.. ? you hate me or not.. ? And please, tell the truth because i have 99 ways
to know that.."
"You see, doc.. that's the problem here.. truth isn't the truth and lie isn't the lie...
what will be your reaction...if i tell you that somehow i got the ability to go in
another universe... how will you react if i tell you that i've already met you in
another world and That is how, on that day outside of Barangi's house.. when I met
you, I knew your name .. whatever I told you on that day, it was not all lies..."
"Okay..."
"Ye sach hai.. mere paas parallel universe me jaane ka channel hai.. par actual me
main nahi jaata.. meri consciousness travel karti hai.."
"Ookay..."
"You dont trust me.."
"I do want to trust you.. But first , you tell me how you transfer your consciousness
from one world to another... is it your some kind of genetic quality or you have any
secret appliance. Like the one..in inception movie. If yes, then please show
me."indirectly mera mazak udate hue Angelina boli..
Is session ke liye jab main apply kar raha tha tab hobby aur khali samay me main
kya karta hoon.. iska ek column tha.. jaha maine... patti khelna, watching
hollywood movies, tv series bhara tha.. aur yahi se point pakad kar Angelina ne
abhi-abhi mujhpe tanj kasa tha... maine uski taraf dekha... wo ekdum serious thi..
matlab usne abhi just mera mazak udaya par ekdum serious thi.. maine ab use
upar se neeche tak dekha aur bas dekhta raha.. bahut der tak dekhta raha.. is
dauran wo bhi mujhe dekhti rahi.. usne mujhe ratti bhar bhi disturb nahi kiya...

467
shayad wo mera dimag padh rahi thi.. ya phhir mujhe padh rahi thi... waise dono
same hee hai…
"Chodaaa leee.."Angelina ki aankho me aankhe dal ke maine aankho se kaha...

"choda le ek baar, aisa gand marunga ki gand se pasena nikal jayega..."
.
"DMT.."maine kaha..
"Sorry..."
"DMT... dimethyltry…. sorry, i forgot its full form but i think.. it is some kind of
liquid..”aankh mijkar jamhayi lete hue maine kaha “produced naturally in pineal
gland inside brain and in the absence of serotonin… actually, i dont have any idea,
what the hell is this serotonin... all credit goes to 4.0. so in the absence of
Serotonin… DMT fires the neurons.. which results in hallucinations and feeling of
being separated, even visiting another reality... i mean, another universe.. and
from my point of view.. DMT changes the mental channel, opening our minds to
other planes of existence... “
“DMT… Dimethyltryptamine…" ye sunte hee pata nahi Angelina ko kya josh aaya…
wo turant apni jagah se uthi aur fatak se bookshelf ki taraf gayi..
Wo bookshelf me dayi taraf.. bayi taraf… upar se neeche, neeche se upar kuch
badbadate hue kuch dhoondhne lagi... wo is ek single word DMT se itna josh me
thi.. jitna ki use Arman word sunkar hona chahiye tha... wo hadbadi me pura
bookshelf upar se neeche.. neeche se upar.. baye se daye.. daye se baye.. sab check
kar dali.. par wo jo chiz dhoondh rahi thi.. use wo nahi mila... wo ek baar mere
taraf mudi aur phhir se shelf ko upar se neeche.. neeche se upar... baye se daye..
daye se baye.. khangal dala aur tabhi waha ujjar kapde pahne hue ek aadmi
aaya...
.
"Angelina... chale.. we're gonna miss the movie"
"Doctor Boaz..?."us ujjar kapde pahne manav ko dekh kar maine kaha...
"No... i'm his assistant.. Angelina.. please.. time’s up"(another way)
"Time’s up..."stick zameen me tika kar main utha...
Waise toh mujhe, mere se bada ajeeb, khiska hua , satkela insaan koyi nahi lagta..
par DMT sunte hee Angelina ab jaisi harqat kar rahi thi... us-se wo ab kuch-kuch
meri tarah hee lagne lagi thi.. wo kabhi mujhe dekhti toh.. toh kabhi Dr. Boaz ke
assistant ko.. toh kabhi deewar me tangi ghadi ko... toh kabhi apne bookshelf ko..
pata nahi wo kya dhoondh rahi thi.. par mere dwara kahe gaye ek word DMT ne
mano use aise uttejit kar diya tha.. jaise wo aaj tak isi talaash me thi... usne ek aur
baar puri process repeat ki.. yani wahi.. bookshelf me upar se neeche.. daye se baye
dekhne wali process...
"When will you come next time..? i'll rearrange my schedule and yes, you were
right... i met you during camping."
468
Angelina ke is sawal aur is khulase par main apni sextillion dollar ki smile dete hue
khada hua aur waha se jaate hue bola...
"I'll inform you about my next session... and you, 3-dimensional ordinary
Assistant.. remember the word.. Arman.... This is the most sacred word of this
world and by chanting it twice a day... your all sins will be forgiven and you'll go
straight to the heaven.. now, get the out of my way.."
main waha se nikla aur thodi door jaane ke baad wapas palatkar, Angelina ke
office ke bahar deewar khada ho gaya… ye check karne ke liye ki… mere jaane ke
baad wo mere baare me kya baat karte hai… main kuch der wahi bahar khada
raha…
“hatt lawda…. kuch baat hee nahi kar rahe ye toh… zaroor Angelina us assistant se
chudwa rahi hogi… waise main faltu me ladkiyo ke sath vulgar hota hu.. ladkiya
toh mujhse aise hee pat jaye.."
langdate hue main waha se bahar jaane laga aur yahi dua kar raha tha ki wo
assistant mujhe kahi maarne na aa jaye... warna self defence me mujhe etching
needle seedhe uske dil me ghusani padegi...
.
Angelina ke us khulase ne ki wo mujhe pahle se jaanti hai.. mera sar ghuma diya
tha.. mera matlab maine badi mushqil se kaha-kaha ka concept lagakar situation
ko handle kiya tha aur ab wo bol rahi hai ki.. wo mujhe pahle se jaanti hai, mujhse
pahle bhi mil chuki hai par yaha sawal ye nahi hai... yaha sawal ye hai ki sawal
kya hai…. kyunki main jitne sawalo ke jawab dhoondhata hoon, unke jawab milne
se pahle yaa toh sawal badal jate hai ya darjano sawal aur jud jate hai.. i mean it
becomes deeper.. and deeper and deeper... isliye pahle sawal toh clear ho jaye…
jawab toh baad me dhoondh hee lunga…..
"Life is like Physics, 3.0... deeper you go, deeper it becomes and you know the
simple concept of multiverse.. actually you invented it.. truth isn’t the truth.. lie
isn’t the lie.."
.
Multiverse... pata nahi ye kab aur kaise khatm hoga aur usse bhi jyada importance
iska hai.. ki ye shuru kab hua... maine aasman ki taraf dekha.. aur dekhta hee
raha, kyunki aas-paas mauzood logo se main irritate hone laga tha.. tabhi waha
Nisha aayi aur mujhse boli...
"Why are you looking up at the sky..."
Memorial hospital se aane ke baad main apne room nahi gaya tha, balki seedhe
yahi RVC ke park me aaya tha.. main kafi din baad yaha aaya tha, jis-se park
thoda badla-badla sa lag raha tha…. pure park me jhat barabar launde idhar-
udhar daud rahe the.. wahi kuch log jogging… toh kuch aise hee group banakar
ghoom rahe the.. phhir waha kayi couples bhi the.. jo park ka kona-kona pakad kar
baithe hue the... kuch khel premi waha badminton aur basketball khel rahe the...
maine kuch der un anjaan laundo ko basketball khelte hue dekha.. jiske baad kuch-
kuch mera bhi mann hua par tabhi mera hath mere bagal me rakhi stick par gaya..
jis-se maine apna ye vichar tyag diya aur....
469
"Why are you looking up at sky.. "
Usi samay Nisha achanak waha aayi aur ye sawal daag di… par…? yaha toh… yani
is duniya me wo mujhse aise-kaise puchh sakti hai… yaha toh main us-se sirf do
baar hee mila hoon… ek baar thane me aur ek baar aaj subah MBD Restaurant
me…. maine park ke kayi pedo par aaj MBD Restaurant jaate waqt jo nishaan (A..)
banaya tha unhe dekha… wo nishan ab bhi un pedo par tha… yaani main apni
duniya me tha…. phhir ye… yaha… kaise……. zaroor, ye mujhe… i love you… bolne
aayi hogi….
"Why are you looking up at sky.. "Nisha ne apna sawal dohraya…
"I'm all… rumbly in my tumbly...”
“sorry… kyaaa…”
“ i mean… my stomach is growling and i want to eat a pie."
" so, you’re looking for a pie in the sky…. lol..lol..lol… what a rhyming… pie in the
sky…. lol… hahaha… hihihi… hahaha… lol.. lol”
“dekh ke… haste-haste mar mat jaana… ”
“well, you know… you never gonna get a pie in the sky…"
"i know.. but that's my desire… Eating a pie in the sky.. pie means… a good Life and
sky means… a good world.. a good life in a good world…… I’m sure, there would be
many good worlds…. anyway, why did you come here and where is your so-called
fiance and your 3-dimensional ordinary friends.... "
"I felt very bad about what happened in MBD Restaurant.. sorry about that.. tumhe
bahut bura laga hoga na.."
"Main bura nahi maanta...."
"Kyun..."
"You really want to know ?"septillion dollar ki smile dete hue maine Nisha ki taraf
dekha aur phhir..
"I'm sorry too.. i shouldn't have told you all that.."mere kandhe me hath rakhkar
David bola...
"Ye behanchod kaha se aa gaya.. aur mere kandhe me hath.. hath hata
madarjaat... ye shri Arman ka kandha hai, teri maa ka pond nahi, jaha tera baap
jab chahe hath maar de..."
"I said.. i'm sorry.."mera kandha thapthapate hue David muskuraya "actually
maine kuch jyada hee overreact kiya us din, raat ko… police station me aur phhir
MBD restaurant me.. "

470
"No worries.."
"Mere best friend Sonam ke boyfriend Nishad ka birthday hai.. tumhe aana
chahiye, bahut maza aayega.. kyun, David.. David bhi tumse yahi bolna chahta
hai.. kyun, David.."
"Ahhaan.. haa.. haa.. kyun nahi.. tumhe aana chahiye"thoda ladkhadate hue David
bola..
"I know, where is it going and what'll be the end of it.. so it'll be better if i stay
away from you…. because last time Sonam's boyfriend's birthday wasnt good
enough………. for you and your friends.. and if i accept your invitation then history
could repeat itself.. "
Chapter-39: Angelina, her husband and hyperspace

Update-153
Quote:
.
" dude, you just rejected a vagina.. Rich Vagina..."
" tujhe abhi tak samajh nahi aaya kya..? Wo hoshiyari de rahe the.. party
me bulakar bezzati karne ka plan tha un sabka... tu ye nahi samajh saka…? isiliye
Aradhna jaisi ladki bhi teri mar ke nikal gayi.. waise Aradhna se yaad aaya.. uska
bhoot nahi dikhta nahi aajkal..."
"Wo toh waha us jagah kaid ho gayi na.. jaha Gautam ne tere seene me rod
ghusaya tha.. yaad kar, Divya boli thi ki Angelina.. i mean, Aradhna waha Gautam
ke pahle pahuch chuki thi... aur phhir waha ka link toot gaya.. yani wo ab wahi
hogi, i think.. salaaa, kya concept lagaya hoon.."
"Good Night..."
"Good Night.. 3.0"
Maine jeb se EN nikala aur apne forearm ko halka needle se halka-halka kaatkar
A.. letter banane laga taki yadi kabhi bhi kuch bhi gadbad ho toh mere forearm me
bane A.. meri help karenge... mujhe sahi raah dikhayenge… baaki aisa karne me
jhaat kuch dard nahi hua.. main bas shuru me ye dekh leta ki mujhe kis taraf kitne
angle me apna hath kaatna hai aur phhir aankh band karke kaat deta... aankh
isliye band karta tha kyunki dekh ke katne me bada ajeeb lagta tha.. aisa lagta tha

471
ki ulti aa jayegi... upar se dekh kar kalakari karne me dard bhi adhik ho raha
tha.... isliye main aankh band karke hee apna hath kaatne laga…
"Holy Mother... khoon toh ruk hee nahi raha.. aur ab dard bhi dene laga hai..."
dono hatho me jaldi-jaldi kapda baandhte hue maine kaha... aur phhir kapda
baandhkar sanitizer yani dettol ki puri botal hath me udel diya... jis-se dard ke
sath-sath ab jalan bhi hone lagi...
"Iski maa. Ka... arey lawda... "dono hatho se dono hath dabate hue maine kaha..
par dettol ka jalan jab kam nahi hua toh jakar dono hath pani ki balti me daal
diya, jis-se thoda aaram mila aur main wahi balti me hath dale kuch der baitha
raha...
Maine puri raat sone ki koshish ki... mujhe neend bhi aayi, par jab-jab meri aankh
lagti ya band hone lagti tab dono hatho me maine jo karamat ki thi, uske dard ki
karan main turant uth jata aur apne hath me fookne lagta,... is tarah meri puri
raat sirf fookne me beeti aur jaise hee subah hui.. main Vivek ki clinic ki taraf
bhaga.. matlab dheere-dheere.. langadate hue gaya...
.
"Arey dude... itni subah-subah..."
"Ya.. Good Morning.."
"good morning... dude" Fleming ka left hand aur right hand rule dono hatho me ek
sath apply karke usne apna hath hawa me uthaya aur bola "how are you.. dude.. ."
"How am i.. ? I'm good.. very good..” chilla kar maine kaha..
"Sorry dude.. "
Iske baad Vivek ne wo kaam kiya jiske liye main waha aaya tha....
"Ye kyun kiya dude.. apna hath kyun kata.."
"Ek ladki hai, Angelina naam ki.. main us-se fatat le pyar karta hoon aur wahi
dikhane ke liye A... likh liya.."
"Par dono hatho me...?"
"Abey toh mujhe maloom nahi tha na ki.. kaun sa hath kat-te hai.. isliye dono kaat
liya... bata.. hoon na ekdum hoshiyar"
"Haan dude..."
"Bas karna be.. kitni overacting karta hai.. jab se aaya hoon tabse dude-dude kiye
jaa raha hai… ye mujhe doodh- dahi bolna band kar…...."
"Ok bro... bro bolu, bro kaise rahega bro..."
"Ekdum khau aadmi hai be tu... jaisa khau hai, waise hee khau baate karta hai...
Agli baar se koyi role nahi dunga Tujhe... dimag chod deta hai tu pura..."
.
"You said.. DMT alters your brainfunction and grant access to knowledge of
parallel universe..."apna spectacle adjust karte hue Angelina boli...
Main is waqt Angelina ke ghar me tha.. maine kal raat ko apna hath kaatne se
pahle Angelina ko apne next session ke baare me kaha tha ki.. main kal sham tak
aa sakta hoon, jiske baad aaj subah jab main Vivek ke clinic se wapas aakar bf
dekhne ke liye apna mobile dekha toh usme mere next session ki details di hui thi...
Yaha pahuchne ke liye mujhe bahut chakkar kaatne pade.. Autowala khud yaha
tak lane me na jaa kitne logo se kitni baar puchha hoga…. par finally main yaha
pahuch hee gaya aur ab Angelina ke saamne baitha tha…
.
Main Angelina ke sath jaha baitha tha, wo room, Angelina ke office ke mafiq hee
same to same tha.. bas yaha equipmenta nahi the aur ye kuch jyada hee bada tha…
472
"Yesterday.. you said.. DMT alters brainfunctions and grant access to knowledge of
parallel universe.."
"By performing quantum computing.."
"Quantum Computing ? Seriously.. do you even know what is quantum computing
or its reqired conditions ?. first there is no way and no place in earth... where you
can perform this. Second... how you even know it... "
"Lets concentrate on the first one.. why there is no way or no place in earth to
perform quantum computing... i mean i know.. people can go crazy. But..."
"Crazy.. ? This experiment will results in instantly death.. because to transfer
through parallel universe by Q.C., it requires absolute zero temperature and our
brains can't withstands it... now tell me how you know all this.. even i didnt know
much untill i read various journals last night..."
"Maine bhi... whaaaat the..."apna sar pakadkar dabate hue maine kaha... mera sar
achanak itni jor se ghuma ki maine apni aankh band kar li par phhir bhi mujhe sab
kuch dikh raha tha... sab matlab.. sab.. waha ki kayi chize bend hone lagi.. deewar
tedha-medha hokar bookshelf ke sath mix ho gaya... Angelina.. Sofe me baithi thi
par aisa lag raha tha, jaise sofa Angelina ke upar rakha hua ho...
"Mujhe ye sab kaise pata.. ?"Apne hath ki baah upar karke maine kaha "well,
maine bhi journal padha hai... kya main tumhe touch kar sakta.. ? "
"Touch.. Offfcourse.. kyu nahi"thoda hichkichate hue wo boli...
"Tumne kabhi fifth dimension dekha hai..?"
"5th dimension..?"
"Arey 5th dimension.. bole toh hyperspace.. main abhi wahi dekh raha hoon... ise
shabdo me bayan karna mushqil hai.. it's too beautiful and too irritating..."
"Ok... how are you.."
"Absolutely fine..."Angelina ke hath ko dobara se chhu kar maine kaha aur phhir
maine khud ko chhua... "i'm fine.. ekdum tip top.."
"Meri taraf dekho.."
"Main tumhari taraf hee dekh raha hoon..."
"Tum bahar darwaje ki taraf dekh rahe ho.. "
"Because of shrinkage established due to 5th dimension...i can see you anywhere in
this room.. it's amazing... "neeche aa chuki chhat ko chhune ke liye apna hath upar
karte hue maine kaha..
.
"Yesterday you said that you hate everyone. Let me give you a situation.... now
think, you are in train.. going to somewhere.. There are many people with you and
then there is a traveler sitting next to you, whom you do not know .... after few
hours, something unthinkable happens.. he just collapses right in front of you due
to sudden heart attack.. what will you do..? You'll call for help or you'll start
helping him by yourself.... "
"how about third option... i'll do nothing.. i'll enjoy the show.."
"Choose between option first and second"

473
" main bahut selfish aadmi hoon... mam, duniyadari ka kaam duniya par chhod
deta hoon. Jab mere marne jeene se dusaro ko matlab nahi toh dusaro ke marne-
jeene se mujhe kyun matlab hone laga..."
Angelina mujhe dekhti rahi.. dekhti rahi aur isi dauran dheere-dheere shrinkage
khatam hone laga.. yani sab kuch pahle ke mafiq normal, ordinary, 3 dimensional
hone laga... jiske baad maine ek aur baar Angelina ka hath chhat ki taraf dekhte
hue chhua..... jaan-buchkar.
"Ok.. ab tum mujhse puchh sakte ho ki maine tumhe us din Bairangi ke ghar me
pahchan-ne se inkar kyu kar diya... "
"Mujhe nahi janna... abhi toh bilkul bhi nahi... kyunki main apni life me jitna
andar jata hoon utna hee andar faste jata hoon.. mujhe aur koyi sach ya vastvikta
nahi janni.. phhir chahe wo meri imagination hee kyun na ho.. ya phhir some sort
of alternative life memory.. as i said earlier"
"And as i replied earlier.. it's not possible and you must live in reality not in your
imaginary...... 5-dimensional world.. where you have access to Visit multiverse...
and i'm gonna help you because reality never changes.."
"my imaginations are realer than reality. my imaginations are so real that they
become real... and your finding reality quest is good.. but not for me.. apply on
someone else." apne dono hath faila kar maine kaha "I'm Arman, Son of Physics...
and Life is like physics.. deeper you go, deeper it becomes..."
"No, Life isn't like physics.. Life is like psychology,, deeper you go, simpler it
becomes... so your time is up... and the next time you come.. i'll ask you about your
relationship with your family... be prepared"
"Never warn your opposition. you know.. i can manipulate facts.."
"Trust me, you can't.. and don't forget i've 99 ways to know the truth.."
"And i've 199 ways to tell a lie.... i won by 100 ways.."
"Then let it be.. good night..."

.
Main waha se nikla.. raat ho chuki thi aur Nagpur ke is chhor se us chhor tak jaane
ka tension alag... upar se Angelina ne kaha tha ki wo next time mere family
background par discuss karegi...
"Baju hat be..."mere saamne achanak prakat hue aadmi ko dekh kar maine kaha
Par wo baju hatne ke bajay mujhse bahas karne laga ki maine use aise kaise bol
diya... maine use aise-kaise dhakka de diya... phhir usne mere baare me puchha ki..
main kaun hoon aur main uske ghar me kya kar raha tha...
"Tera ghar hai toh kya be... shanti se nikal le warna tujhe khel lunga, khilaune ki
tarah"

474
"Hey, ruko ek minute... "kadakti aawaz me usne mujhe aawaz di..
"Arey hat lawda..."

.
"Tujhe pata hai, tu abhi kiske sath bhidha..."2.0 ne bahar aane ke sath hee
puchha...
"Dr. Boaz..."
"Angelina ka husband hai wo... tujhe kya lagta hai, wo kaise react karegi next
time.. jab use ye pata chalegi ki.. tu, usi ke ghar me.. usi ke husband ko galiya baka
hai..."
"All session completed... ab main wapas nahi jaane wala... main isiliye kisi
psychologist ya therapist ke paas nahi ja raha tha.. kyunki mujhe maloom tha ki,
is-se kuch nahi hoga... mera matlab 5-dimensional disease ka treatment ek 3-
dimensional world me kaise hoga... upar se wo mere family ke baare me
puchhegi... main ye nahi kah raha ki wo ek kharab psychologist hai.. wo actually
bahut achchhi hai aur ho sakta hai, uske andar mere jaise koyi hidden talent bhi
ho.. par tune dekha na ki.. mujhpar ab tak koyi effect nahi hua.. upar se 10,000
chud gaye wo alag..."
"Toh seedhe-seedhe bol na ki paise nahi hai.. bahana kyi marta hai.."
"As i said.. i've 199 ways to tell a lie.. these are just 2-3"
"Actually.. mere khayal se... Angelina sahi direction me ja rahi hai... wo pahle
problem ko samajh rahi hai ki tere sath locha kya hai, phhir wo use verify karti hai
ki tu aiwe hee toh nahi bol raha.. jaise wo train wala example... wo bas verify kar
rahi thi ki tu sach me misanthrope hai ya nahi... usne tujhe do option diye the aur
dono me us heart attack wale aadmi ki tu help kar raha tha.. par tune teesara
option banaya.. enjoy the show... wala. Jis-se wo sure ho gayi.. aur next time wo ek
step aur neeche jayegi... tere family background aur foreground me...
"Wow... "
"So next session pakka..."
"Ab Main apna har decision mutth marne ke baad leta hoon... taki josh-josh me
kahi koyi galti na kar du.. isliye aaj raat mutth marne ke baad sochunga..."
.
.
Toh phhir jaisa ki maine decide kiya tha, maine sochaaa..... par bina mutth mare..
kyunki mutth marne ke baad meri thinking power kam ho jati hai, isliye bina
mutth mare main sochta raha ki mujhe next session attend karna chahiye ya nahi..
par ye sochte-sochte main main yahi nahi soch paya aur..... kuch aur hee sochne
laga... Jiske baad mujhe samajh aaya ki Angelina ne mujhe ye kyun kaha ki next
session me wo meri family ke baare me baat-chit karegi.. actually, wo mere
memory ko trigger kar rahi thi. Wo chahti thi ki main ye sab sochu.. jo ki ab main
soch raha tha. Wakayi me yar... matlab really... itna mind game..
.
.
475
Ye sunkar mujhe kafi odd lagta hai, jab koyi kahta hai... tell me, those three
magical words... Three Magical Words... ... 3.. i mean three... ye mujhe wakayi me
kafi odd lagta hai. Iski do vazah hai.. pahla toh yahi ki 3 khud apne aap me ek odd
number hai aur dusara mathematics field se hone ke karan maine ise jyada
seriously le liya... isliye maine math ka basic funda lagaya aur 2 se multiply karke
ise even bana diya.. is tarah mere liye ye three magical words se six magical words
me tabdil ho gaya aur wo six magical words hai...
Chapter-40: Hiraeth~home sickness.
Update-155
Ye sunkar mujhe kafi odd lagta hai, jab koyi kahta hai... tell me, those three
magical words... Three Magical Words... ... 3.. i mean three... ye mujhe wakayi me
kafi odd lagta hai. Iski do vazah hai.. pahla toh yahi ki 3 khud apne aap me ek odd
number hai aur dusara mathematics field se hone ke karan maine ise jyada
seriously le liya... isliye maine math ka basic funda lagaya aur 2 se multiply karke
ise even bana diya.. is tarah ye three magical words se six magical words me tabdil
ho gaya aur wo six magical words hai...
My Life... My Journey.... My Way....
.
My College Life... shayad shabd kam pad jaye is journey ko describe karne me...
sabki apni journey hoti hai aur sabka apna ek tarika... kaha se ye shuru hua aur
kaha khatm hua. Maine college me jitna dusaro ko torture kiya utna torture main
khud bhi hua.. especially.. 8th Semester me. Aur jab main college se wapas ghar aa
raha tha.. tab main is ummid ke sath ghar aa raha tha ki ab mujhe sukoon milega..
ab finally sab pareshani khatm ho gayi. Ab sharifo wali zindagi jeene ka waqt aa
gaya hai.. ab mahan insaan se aam insaan banne ka waqt aa gaya hai... 8th
Semester ke baad mujhe bas sukoon ke do pal chahiye the, jiske baad main apni
zindagi ke baare me soch saku.. apni zindagi me aage badh saku.
.
Par main ye nahi bhoola tha ki maine beete char saal me kya kiya tha aur na hee
mere ghar wale.. aur na hee mere mohalle wale... main apna bag pack karke ghar
toh aa gaya, par kuch din rahne ke baad pata chala ki ab ye wo ghar nahi tha.. jo
bachpan me hua karta tha.. maine 11th me jo ghar chhoda tha uske baad jaise main
kabhi ghar aa hee nahi paya tha... na toh main apne gharwalo ko samajh pa raha
tha aur na hee mere gharwale mujhe... bole toh mutual un-understanding. baki
Vipin bhaiya se man-mutav toh jamane bhar se chala aa raha tha.. par pichhale
kuch salo me jis tarah unhone ek-do baar mera sath diya tha us-se mujhe laga tha
ki shayad... anyway. mere maa-baap mere maa-baap hone ka farz nibha rahe the
aur mujhe paal rahe the.
.
8th Semester me jab se main police station se chhuta tha, tab se kisi ne mujhse baat
nahi ki thi aur 8th Semester khatm hone ke baad bhi yahi chalta raha... main
subah jab mann hota uthta, jab mann hota khana khata aur jab mann hota
ghoomne nikal jata... purane dost jo ek-do bache the.. unke sath kuch time bitata
aur phhir wapas ghar aa jata... kayi dino tak mera yahi routine raha aur main
iska aadi bhi ho gaya tha. Mujhe mere school ke dost ke sath-sath mere School ki
ladkiya bhi kabhi-kabhar dikhti thi... par ab wo mujhe aakarshan se nahi balki
pratikarshan ke tarike se dekhti thi.. thanks to Aradhna. Par aisa karne wali wo
476
akeli nahi thi, mere ek-do purane dost ko chhodkar(jinhe mere ahsaan ab bhi yaad
the) sabka mere prati yahi vyavhar tha.. chahe wo koyi bhi ho, kisi bhi umra ka
ho... khaskar ke bade-bujurg. pahle mujhe dekh kar jin logo ke gand se hafto goo
nahi nikalta tha wo ab mujhe dekhte hee hag dete the... wo bhi muh se. sale,
betichod.. mujhe dekhte hee mere college ke baare me, Aradhna ke baare me, mera
future me kya karne ka iirada hai... ye sab puchhne lagte. par main bhi kam nahi
tha... shuru-shuru me toh ek-do baar main sah gaya, haskar nikal diya lekin jab
wo nahi mane toh ek din bol diya ki "tumhare jaisa garib nahi hoon jo kuch karu,
bahut paisa hai mere paas..."
.
Mera hometown koyi bahut bada shahar nahi tha jaha bagal wale ko bagal wale se
koyi matlab na ho... balki ye ek hill station ke roop me ek kasba tha...aur yaha
bagal wale ko bagal wale shahar me kya hua, is-se bhi matlab rahta tha. jaha main
rahta tha, wo ek hill station tha aur sath me colliery area bhi.. matlab jaha mines
vagerah thi.. ek baar toh hadd tab ho gayi jab main ek dukaan me doodh lene
gaya.. jab main gaya toh us dukaan me ek ladki dukaan sambhale hue thi aur jaise
main waha pahucha aur hath me doodh ke packet ka shape banakar jaise hee
doodh maanga toh wo ladki chilla kar turant andar bhag gayi.. madarchod... in
logo ki inhi harkato ne mujhe wo banaya jo main aaj hoon.... uske baad us ladki ka
baap bahar aaya aur mujhe doodh ka packet diya aur jab main doodh ka packet
lekar chupchap waha se jaane laga toh wo bola...
"Ise apna college mat samajhna... yaha wo sab harqat ki toh khaal kheech lenge..."
Aur phhir main rook gaya.. maine apni nonillion dollar ki smile dete hue peeche
muda... kuch der tak us dukan wale ko dekh kar gusse se muskurata raha aur
phhir uske sar me doodh ka packet fek ke mara.. jo ki uske sar me hee jakar foota...
"Is baar aise hee chhod de raha hoon, next time.. tera takla nahi teri beti ki seal
todunga...yadi mujhe kuch bola toh.."
"Bhosdiwale... Rook tu.. aye susheel.. aye Sonu.. bahar aava ta..."
"Bula...bula.. sabko bula.. apni beti ko bhi bula.. uski gand dekh lu, taaki chodne se
pahle andaza rahega ki kitne KN ke force ke sath lawda dalna padega... arey ye
toh.. ek pal me bahar aa gayi.. sali lawda dekhi nahi ki muh fad ke aa gayi.. aur ye
hai, tere Susheel aur Sonu... hahaha... abey moot dunga toh bah jayenge ye.. jis
samay ye chaddi me moot-te the na us samay Shri Arman din me 5 baar mutth
mara karta tha.. wo bhi bina bf dekh ke. ye mujhse ladenge... jao jake apni maa ka
pond dabao be.. aur tu sun be.. jhaklu.. main sirf bolta hee nahi, chodta bhi hoon...
isliye apna muh aur gand sambhal ke rakhna...... lawdaaaaaaaa... jyada uchko
mat be, warna khel lunga tum sabko, khilaune ki tarah...
"
.
iske baad maine Dukan ke andar hath daal kar doodh ka dusara packet nikala aur
waha se ghar ki taraf badh gaya.. ghar jaate waqt maine dekha ki mohalle ke
saare aadmi, sari aurat.. apne ghar ke bahar khadi hokar ye nazara dekh rahi
thi... us dukan wale ne sach hee kaha tha ki ye mera college nahi tha kyunki ye
baat ab mere ghar pahuchne wali thi.. par usne ek baat galat kahi thi ki... wo meri
khaal kheech lega.. kyunki khaal toh main in sabki kheechne wala tha...
.
477
"Tujhe pata hai.. jo log ab tujhse ghrina karte hai, apne mohalle ke wahi log kuch
saal pahle tak apne bachcho ko tera example diya karte the... jo ghar me ye bahana
marte ki uski tabiyat kharab thi ya phhir wo kahi khelne gaya tha.. isliye uske
number achchhe nahi aaye.. toh unke maa-baap kahte the ki kya teer maar liya
unhone.. kaun National khel aaye, kaun sa har din subah sham do-do ghante
practice karte the.. jo unhe padhne ka samay nahi mila.. Arman ko dekho,
Basketball me do saal national khel aaya, Merit me naam le aaya, Mumbai-Delhi
ke un-un institution me ghoom aaya, jaha aam aadmi ja tak nahi sakta.. aur tu
yaha ghar me baithe-baithe patthar tod raha hai aur bolta hai ki sports ke karan
tere number nahi aaye... seriously , man... maine kabhi nahi socha tha ki tu aisa
banega... Degradation of The Great Arman.."Akib ne kaha aur phhir ek cigarette
nikal kar mujhe thamaya...
.
Akib wahi ladka tha, jiska roll number school ke dino me mere thik aage rahta
tha,.. jise main pel ke nakal karwata tha.. aur ye wahi banda hai, jise main exam
ka dar dikha-kar beech sadak me Varun ke sath milkar iski bike chheeni thi, jab
Main Varun ke bhai ko bachane ke rescue mission par nikla tha... kul milakar kahu
toh wo meri badaulat 10th pass hua tha aur aaj bhi sirf 10th pass hee hai.. kyunki
uske baad main Bhopal ravana ho gaya tha aur Akib ne teen saal 12th me fail hone
ke baad padhayi chhod di thi aur apne baap ki kirane ki dukaan par baithta tha...
maine use kayi baar kaha bhi ki U.P. se form bhar de.. khulla nakal hota hai waha
kuch district me... 10,000 kharch kar.. . 80-85 % toh bade aaram se ban jayega. Par
usne kaha ki woo doctor ki degree hee kyun na le le.. use baithna toh uski dukaan
me hee hai toh phhir wo kyun apni mehnat aur paisa barbaad kare...jiske baad
maine wo six magical words kahe ki.. your life.. your journey... your way...
.
"Maal piyega..."bus stand se thodi door bane kachche gharo me se jab ek ghar ka
darwaza khula toh Akib ne mujhse puchha...
"Maal.. matlab.. gaanja na...?"
"Hao..."
"Nahi piyunga , lawda.. gand fat gayi thi last time. Lawda gaanv me tha tab.. do-
char gaanv ke mustande aaye aur bole ki... chal, Arman.. tujhe Jannat
dikhayenge.. maine bhi aav na dekha taav aur apna lund khada kiye unke sath
chal diya.. ki zaroor kisi ladki ko chodne ja rahe honge.. aur as a goodwill, mujhe
bhi invite kiya hai.. salo ne gaanje ki hari pattiya pila de.. uske baad jo chadhi
behanchod.. aisa sar ghooma ki.. lawda taalab ke upar se ludhak kar neeche taalab
me gir gaya tha..."
"Arey aaja.. ho jaye do-do fook..."
"Tu pahle party de..."
"Party Kis khushi me..."
"10th me 82 % bane the tere.. us khushi me..."

478
"10th me...? bhai, 6 saal beet gaye, us baat ko... kaha laga hai aur us samay maine
itni alishan party di thi ki puch mat.. mere khandan me main eklauta aisa tha,
jisne kabhi kisi bhi class me 70 % cross kiya tha... ab kya party du.. ab toh mujhe ye
bhi nahi pata ki meri marksheet kaha rakhi hai..."
"Waah beta, sabko party de di.. lekin jo us party ki vazah tha... use hee party nahi
diya.. kal sham ko milna yahi pe.. jyada nahi, bas ek khamba.. ek packet marlboro
aur... aur kya... bas..."bus stand se nikal kar ghar ki taraf prasthan karte hue
maine kaha.. "kal sham yahi pe... adda jugad kar lena... jhadi-jhunjhati ke peechhe
baith kar nahi piyunga main..."
Bus stand se main ghar ke liye chal diya.. mere hath me ab bhi doodh ka packet
tha. Jise bhookh lagne par maine raaste me hee khola aur ghar aate hue pee gaya...
kyunki mujhe maloom tha ki ghar jaate hee gaali khana hai toh khali pet kyun
khaun...
.
"Oye Arman... tu sun"mujhe dhakka dete hue mere school time ke ek dost ne kaha...
Yaad hai , maine kaha tha ki ab yaha mere sirf ek-do dost bache hai.. well, dusara
yahi tha. Par wo is samay gusse me tha... wo bhi mujhpar.. jiski vazah bhi main
jaanta tha....
"Tujhe pata hai, jis dukann wale ko tu abhi thodi der pahle bak kar aaya hai, wo
mera saga chacha hai... mera dost hote hue bhi tu mere chacha se lada.. meri behan
aur chachi ko gali di... kaha gaya tera friendynamic rule.. kya tujhe nahi pata tha
kya ki.. wo mere chacha ka pariwar hai.... "
"Kya tere chacha ko pata tha ki.. tu mera dost hai..."
"Haan..."
"Toh phhir yadi wo ye jaankar meri insult kar sakta hai toh phhir main kyun
nahi...? Waise bhi tere chacha ki mohalle ke ladko ko tanj kasne ki bahut purani
adat hai... Varun ke bhai ko wo kaise insult karta tha.. maine dekha tha. Aaj usne
galat aadmi ko pakad liya... got it now get lost" bolne ke baad maine wapas doodh
ka packet apne muh se lagaya aur ghar ki taraf badh chala...
"Le madarchod..."
Maine ye suna aur uske baad hee mere peeth me bahut tez dard utha.. usne ek
patthar uthar kar seedhe meri peeth me de mara tha...
"Teri dayi ka bhosda..."peeth sahlate hue main peechhe muda aur jaise hee main
peechhe muda wo bhagne laga... aur uske peechhe main bhi bhaga...
Shuru-shuru me jab tak peeth dard de raha tha, meri speed kam thi par phhir thodi
der baad jab main normal hua toh main daudte hue hee zameen se ek patthar
uthaya aur aur daudte hue hee use fek ke mara...

479
"Bhagne ka pahla niyam... kabhi straight line me mat bhago..."jab patthar uske
peeth ke beech-o-beech laga toh maine kaha... par wo ruka nahi.. wo bhagta hee
raha aur uske peechhe main bhi...
Ek Sports person hone ka fayda ye hai ki aise mauke pe stamina kaam aata hai...
upar se jab aapko school time me daily 10-12 km daudne ki practice ho... actually
humare coach ne school time me hume daudte hue relax kaise karna hai ye sikhaya
tha aur wahi ab mere kaam aa raha tha...
"Hoooooo... gaaand... faaaad diya.... dauda....aate ... dauda...aate..."apne dost ko

pakad kar neeche dhakelne ke baad main bola aur phhir kuch der tak ghutno me
hath rakh kar hafta hee raha....
"Never.... ever... betray..... Arman..."joota utar kar uske gaal pe maarte hue maine
kaha..
Maine shuru me ek baar mara.. phhir ruka aur dusari baar mara .. main phhir
ruka aur teesari baar mara... jiske baad main ek baar phhir rook gaya.. lekin meri
atma ko santusti nahi mili thi.. meri antaratma mujhe kah rahi thi ki main use aur
maru... jiske baad maine use back to back maarna shuru kar diya aur tab tak
maarta raha, jab tak ki uske muh se khoon nahi nikal gaya aur aakhiri me uske
naak me ek joota maar kar uska naak bhi lahu-luhan kar diya....
"Never betray Arman..."

.
.
"Kya uncle... subah-subah aagan dhone lage, well done..."ghar ke paas pahuch kar
maine apne ghar ke paas rahne wale ek uncle se kaha...
jisne ki mujhe bachpan me kafi motivate kiya tha ki main dhang se padhayi karu...
motivate karne se mera matlab hai jaleel karna. Usne mujhe ek baar mere
percentage kam aane par mujhe bahut jaleel kiya tha..
Mere sawal ka us uncle ne koyi jawab nahi diya aur balti ka pani udel kar aagan
dhota raha...
"Kya uncle, itni subah-subah saaf-safayi.... ghar ki saaf-safayi aap karte hooo..?
Maid kaha gayi.."
"Arey wo late aati hai aur Main bas aagan saaf kar leta hoon, subah-subah... taaki
logo ko lage ki andar bhi safai ho chuki hai... a psychological trick..."
"Toh uncle, logo ko ye bhi toh lagega ki jab bahar aapne jhadu-pochha mara hai
toh andar bhi aapne hee mara hoga... Lol... log aap par haste honge.. aunty ji ke
ishare par nachne wala kahte honge aapko... hahahaha..... "
Maine kaha aur waha se haste hue apne ghar ki taraf chal diya.. ghar me ghuste
hue maine time dekha.. main subah 6 baje doodh lene nikla tha aur abhi 8 baj
chuke the.. upar se khali hath. isliye mujhe thoda-thoda aabhas ho chuka tha ki
mere andar ghuste hee kya scene create hoga... khair main andar ghusa aur jaise
hee andar ghusa mujhe dhad-dhada ke ek sath kayi log dikhe... mera baap.. meri
maa.. mera bada bhai.. wo dukandar jise maine chamkaya tha aur do policewale...

480
"Aa gaya.. idhar aa..."mera collar pakad kar Vipin bhaiya ne mujhe ghaseeta aur
us dukandar ke saamne khada kar diya "kya bolke aaya hai tu aaj inki beti aur
inke wife ke baare me.."
"Shuru inhone kiya tha.. mujhe ulta-seedha bol rahe the.. toh maine phhir inhe
ulta-seedha kah diya..."
"Kya bola tha... Dineshwar uncle ne..."
"Mujhe bola ki.. yadi maine college jaisi harqat ki toh meri khaal kheech lega..."
"Toh kya galat bola"bolte hue mere Papa saamne aaye aur ratak se ek jhapad mere
gaal me mara, jo ki seedhe mere muh laga... "yaha rahna hai toh kayde se rah..
college nahi hai tera.."
.
Apne papa ka ek jhapad khate hee mera dimag sanna gaya, kaan garam ho gaye
aur mere muh se halka khoon nikla.. shayad honth fat gaya tha aur tabhi....
"Vipiiiin... oye Vipiin.. bahar nikaal apne bhai ko... bahut bada gunda samajhta
hai, apne aapko...."bahar se kisi ne aawaz mara...
"Not nowwwww...please."bahar se chillate hue aadmi ki aawaz sunkar maine khud

se kaha..
Update-157
Usne ek aur baar bahar se aawaz mari aur abki baar mere baap ka naam lekar...
jiske baad mere aalawa sab bahar gaye aur main wahi apne honth par ungali
firate hue sofe par baith gaya.. jiske baad mera bhai andar aaya aur mujhe
ghaseet kar jo do policewale aaye the, unke saamne fek diya aur bola ki wo mujhe
le jaaye... ab aur wo mujhe bardasht nahi kar sakte...
.
.
Mere dimag me apne routine ke mutabik dard shuru ho gaya aur main apni is soch
se bahar aaya... meri imagination power ye sab sochte hue itni strong thi ki mujhe
aisa lag raha tha.. jaise just abhi-abhi mere bhai ne mujhe maara ho... mujhe ab
bhi mere dost ka khoon me sana hua chehra saamne dikh raha tha. Infact aankh
kholne ke baad bhi mujhe mere maa-baap, mera bhai.. wo dukandar, wo do
policewale aaju-baju khade hue dikh rahe the.. jaise-jaise mere sar ka dard badha..
waise-waise unki tasveere dhumil hote gayi aur phhir gayab ho gayi...
"That was hell of the day..."aankh mijte hue main badbadaya aur so gaya...
.
.
" tumhari tarah main bhi yahi sochta hoon ki... maine faltu me apne purane dost
ko us din mara, mujhe aisa nahi karna chahiye tha.. par maine kiya aur kyunki
maine ye kiya.. isliye mujhe aisa nahi karna chahiye tha... ab ye nahi sochna
chahiye... maine kiya, kyunki mujhe wahi sahi laga. Baki sahi-galat ki mujhe
jyada parvaah nahi "
"REALLY..."
481
"Yup.."
"and why ..."
"i don't believe in ethics.. i'm the ethically unethical."Maine Angelina se kaha...
Main is waqt Memorial hospital me tha aur Angelina doctor ke libas me spectacle
lagaye mere saamne baithi hui thi... main jitni baar uske honth dekhta, utni hee
baar mera lund hunkar maarne lagta... usne lipstick nahi lagayi thi par phhir bhi
uske honth naturally kafi pink the... maine Angelina ko dekh-kar khud ko bahut
control karne ki koshish ki par jab mere hawas ki saari limit toot gayi toh maine
5th dimension ka bahana karke Angelina ko chhoone ka plan banaya... jaisa ki last
session me maine kiya tha. Bas difference ye rahta ki is samay mujhe khud 5th
dimension visualize karna tha aur waisi hee natural acting karni thi.... so maine
show shuru kiya...
"I told you already, i've 99 waysss.... so, don't do it.."
"Iskiiii... "turant apna hath peechhe karte hue maine kaha...
"Ok.. ye ladayi mar-pit chhodo aur ye batao ki tumne apne ghar ke paas rahne
wale uncle ko kyun bura bhala kaha..."
"Kaun.. wo aagan dhone wala..? Us-se toh bahut purana rada tha apun ka.. hua
actually ye tha kiiiii..... main hamesha se padhne me tez nahi tha.. matlab tez tha,
par utna bhi nahi... jab main 7th standard me tha, tab maine gaur kiya ki bahut
log.. jo school-college pass kar gaye hai... wo akasar aapas me kuch numbers
discuss karte rahte the ki... open kya aaya, jodi kya bani, aaj 23 khela tha, 32 ban
gaya.... sala din me 52 khela tha, raat me 52 ban gaya.. 65 khela tha, 63 ban
gaya........ matlab ati confusion... phhir mujhe pata chala ki ye ek prakar ka jua
tha.. jisko ye log satta matka bolte the. Satta Matka...Meri curiosity aur badhti
gayi aur ek din itni badh gayi ki maine ek ko pakda aur iske baare me puchh
mara... jiske baad mera toh bheja hil gaya, matlab... 10 se 99 number tak number
choose karo aur Matka khilane ke paas jakar wo number laga do... yadi wo exact
match kar gaya toh 1 ka 80 milta hai.. yani 100 ka 8000... phhir kya tha, maine
socha ki koyi pattern hee hoga, jiske base par number nikalte honge ye log... us
samay mere paas jyada source nahi tha.. upar se umra bhi kam... so maine us din
ke baad jitne number aaye unko likhte gaya aur pure samay... din.. raat wo
pattern pakadne ki koshish karte rahta jis par ye number nikalte hai... do-char din
ke number kisi ek pattern ko follow toh karte par phhir se pattern change ho jata...
tumhe yaki nahi hoga main us saal quarterly aur half yearly dono exams me all
subjects me fail hua... reason wahi.. mere dimag me har samay sirf aur sirf number
ghoomte the.. mano main pagal ho gaya tha. Mujhe 6-7 mahina laga us pattern ka
tod nikalne me... actually ye tod nahi tha...balki pichhale mahine jo numbers aaye
the.. unme matha pachchi karke maine ek date nikali 20 jan... jis din har taraf se
04 jodi banne wali thi..."rook kar maine apna seena sahlate hue Angelina ki taraf
dekha.... wo badi shanti se aur ekdum dhyan se meri baat sun rahi thi...
"Toh us din maine 04 par 500 lagaya... aurrrr.."bolte-bolte mera seene me itni jor
se jalan hui ki main bolte hue rook gaya aur apna seena sahlane laga...

482
"Paaa..ni.."
Maine Pani piya, jis-se mujhe thodi rahat mili aur apna seena sahlate hue maine
aage bolna shuru kiya...
"Toh us din main kafi sure tha ki 04 hee banega aur.... 04 hee bana.. us umra me
mere hath me 40,000 rupaye aa gaye the.. 6-7 mahine 04 ke liye waste kar diya tha
aur baki bache din us 40 hazar ko kharch karne me... jiska result ye nikla ki mera
result barbaad ho gaya.. passed by grace aur us chirand ne... puri garmi.. jab bhi
mujhe dekhta.. har jagah mera result puchhta. Har din.. har waqt sala mujhe
torture kar raha tha wo.. uske sath koyi bhi ho, mere sath koyi bhi ho... bas wo
mujhe dekh le toh uska muh fat jata tha. Anytime...anywhere... madarr... sorry.
Mera matlab, usne mera jeena haram kar diya tha... jiske baad maine padhna
shuru kiya and the rest is history..."
"Tum chahte toh itna sab kuch 3-4 lines me summarize kar sakte the aur ye
tumhare seene me kya hua hai..."
"'Pata nahi.. andar hee andar jalan ho raha hai... adhik cigarette peene ki vazah se
hoga... ek do baar pahle bhi ho chuka hai.. normal hai.."
"Ok.. what's your aim in life..."
"Aim... kuch nahi.... i can become anything i want... even a doctor and for that i just
need to connect myself to that universe, where i would be a Doctor..."
"Maybe you haven't found your passion yet..."
"Actually, i already found it. I want to become a Sanyasi and settle in the
Himalayas ... the most distant, all alone ... busy in myself. I want solitude so that I
can write epics and by doing this i'll heal my soul.... in a way it will be a
mediation."
"And that's... i mean.. all this.. becoming a sanyasi... writing epics in himalayas is
your aim... ?"
"Why not, what's wrong in it... i'll be an Epicstar.. "
"Epicstar..?"
"I don't... know. I just created that word..."
"Very good... so you want to write stories.. Tell me, something about your stories
or epics you're gonna write.."
"First I'll write about myself.. in 2 parts.. in first part i'll show my college life and in
second.. i don't have any idea and then i'll write another epic.. Hiraeth and then
another... Rogue Black hole.. and then another... After the Mirror.. and then.. The
Solar Eclipse and then.... Rise of the Warrior and then.. Zero Point... and then...
Deadfall and then...."
"Ok.. stop..."mujhe achanak se chup kara kar Angelina boli... " hiii... Xalxo"
483
"I'm sorry .. mujhe disturb nahi karna chahiye tha.. par..."paas aakar us 3-
Dimensional Ordinary Assistant ne Angelina ke kaan me kuch kaha aur use jo
kahna tha, wo kahkar wo turant waha se jaane laga... jiske baad maine us-se wahi
kaha jo maine first time kaha tha...
"And Don't forget to chant my name.. remember..? Your all sins will be forgiven
and you'll go straight to the heaven..."
Update-158
"Di.. please, take care of it... he's having a blood rush.."mujhe completely ignore
markar Xalxo ne Angelina par dabav banaya....
"Diii.. ? toh ye Xallll.. sala pronunciation kya hoga.. iske name ka.. toh ye Xalxo,
Angelina ka bhai hai.. main khamkha sochne laga tha ki Angelina ka iske sath
affair hoga... par sala ye dikhta kaisa hai. kaha, Angelina... kudarat ka karishma
aur kaha ye... kudarat ka shraap... Angelina ka toh nahi par lagta hai Angelina ki
maa ka zaroor affair raha hoga..."
.
Xalxo ke jaane ke baad Angelina Silva mujhe kuch der ke liye ghoorti rahi... is
tarah shayad wo apna gussa thanda kar rahi hai thi...
"Tum samajh gaye hai na..."
Jis par maine haan me sar hilaya...
"Good... don't do it again.. now we're done.. your next session is on..."
"I'm sorry, i promise... I.N.D.I.A."udas hote hue maine kaha...
" I.N.D.I.A. ?"
"i'll never do it again... kabhi padha nahi kya " bolkar main hasne laga...
"You know.. you aren't terrific.. you're terrible... but ok.. lets move on.. what you
do in free time.."
"lawde se khelta hoon"main badbadaya...
" hmm .."
"Main aage ke liye plan banata hoon.. matlab aage, jo bhi problem aane wali hai..
unke liye main yojnaye banate rahta hoon.. pahle main ek plan banata hoon phhir
us plan ke liye.. ek dusra plan.. taaki yadi first wala kisi karanvash flop ho gaya
toh...? Aur phhir un dono ke liye.. ek teesara aur un teeno ke liye ek chautha... is
tarah kisi bhi ek situation se nikalne ke liye mere paas kayi tareeke hote hai..."
"ookayy.. ahem.. par tumhe pata kaise chalta hai ki aane wale dino me kya aane
wala hai... matlab tumhe aane wali problems ka pata kaise chalta hai, ab ye mat
kahna ki tum future bhi dekh sakte ho "mand-mand muskurate hue Angelina boli...

484
"main khud problems create karta hoon.... "agal-bagal, aage-peechhe dekh kar
main dheere se bola " example ke taur par Daddu ko le lo... Daddu ko toh jaanti hee
hogi, ya phhir suna toh hoga hee... use jail bhejne ke peechhe mera hath tha, par
kisi ko batana mat..."
par Angelina ne mujhe yahi par roka aur ek card meri taraf khiskate hue session
khatm kar di... card kisi doctor ka tha. Angelina ne mujhe us-se milne ki salah di...
jis-par maine apna sar haan me hilaya aur seene me hath firate hue utha..
" one request... Quit smoking.. it's damn injurious to your health"
"Yeah, it's injurious to health.. causes cancer etc. etc. I read it on packet... it may be
bad for my health but good for my soul.... aur sharir ka kya hai Silva ji, Sharir toh
nashvar hai.. aaj hai, kal nahi rahega.. lekin cigarette kal bhi thi aur kal bhi
rahegi.. anyway.. sayonara........."
"bye and don't die..."

.
Memorial Hospital se nikal kar main city bus me baitha.. jis seat par main baitha
uske just aage wali seat par ek policewala ek bachche ke sath baitha hua tha...
"Papa, aee Nagar Nigam ka hothe... madam kal bole rahis ki maloom karke aabo"
"Jis shahar ya kasbe ki jansankhya 2 lakh ya us-se adhik hoti hai toh waha
prashashan ke liye ek sthaniya sarkar banayi jati hai, use hee Nagar Nigam kahte
hai.."
"Aur ye Collector ka hothe..."us bachche ne apne baap se agla sawal puchha... par
mera dhyan us bachche par bilkul nahi tha.
Mera dhyan toh us policewe pe tha.. kyunki Police se mera pyar barso purana
tha... us din jab mere gharwalo ne mujhe police ke hawale kiya toh wo pura din aur
raat mujhe thane me bitana pada... mere kapde utarwakar unhone mujhe lockup
me toh nahi dala par thane me baitha kar zaroor rakha.. naa toh maine wo pura
din kuch khaya aur na hee puri raat... aur phhir dusare din mujhe waha se jaane
ke liye bol diya gaya...
"Dekh.. tera ye first time hai, isliye aise hee warning dekar chhod de rahe hai...
warna jail bhi jaata..."
Pura ek din ho chuka tha, kuch khaye-piye hue.. isliye mu-chodi karne ka mera
koyi mann nahi tha.. isliye main mann gira ke waha se bahar jaane laga...
"Tere baap ke karan chhod diya tujhe, warna itni jaldi nahi chhut-ta... warning
dekar chhod raha hoon..."
"Mere baap ne ye bolne ke liye kaha ya phhir mere bhai ne...?"
"Kya matlab..."
"Matlab ki.. mujhe ye pata hai ki tu mere bhai ke sath baith ke gurchhare udata hai
aur mere bhai ke kahne par hee mujhe kal ek glass paani tak nahi diya tum logo
485
ne... main chahu toh ek hafte ke andar tujhse sorry bulwa sakta hoon.. par kya hai
ki, main apna level maintain karke chalta hoon... aur ek baat... main berojgar
hoon, bakchod nahi... isliye ye darane-dhamkane wali harqat kisi aur ke saamne
karna.. fuck you..."
"Main chahta toh tujhe lockup me puri raat rakh sakta tha, par tere baap ne tujhe
bacha liya.. 75 hazar rupaye tere baap ne diye us ladke ke baap ko, jiska tune sar
foda tha..."
"Fuck you...again"
"Oye idhar aaa... kya bola S.I. sir ko.."
"Fuck you, too.."
"Jaane de khemu ise... apne Vipin ka bhai hai..."

.
Police station se nikalne ke baad main cigarette peene ek thele me gaya.. ye thela
wahi thela tha.. jaha se ek baar maine gusse me cigarette ka packet bina paise diye
utha liya tha... par us waqt jo aadmi baitha karta tha, wo ab budha ho chuka tha...
lekin uski umra ka uski yaddasht se koyi takaja nahi tha.. wo mujhe dekhne ke
kuch der baad hee pahchan gaya...
"Tuuuu..."
"Kya haal hai uncle, kafi jawan dikh rahe ho.. ghabrao mat, aaj cigarette ka packet
lekar nahi bhagunga.. do Marlboro do."
"Ee le.. toh wo tu hai, jiske baare me budhau hume do saal se paka raha hai..."
Maine unki taraf dekha, jinhone ye kaha tha.. wo school ke ladke the aur kamal ki
baat toh ye thi ki wo mere hee school ke ladke the... maine do Cigarette ek sath muh
me fasayi aur dono ko jalakar kash marne ke baad bola...
"... yadi mere baare me aur janna hai toh apne Principal se puchhna ki... Arman
kaun tha.. "
.
.
Cigarette peene ke baad main ghar pahucha.. bahar wale room me meri Maa, 2-3
aurato ke sath baithi hui thi....
"Bahar Car khadi hai, matlab door ke jaan-pahchan wale honge..."bina kisi ko
hi..hello kahte hue main seedhiya chadhne laga...
"Arey, tum log ye kya itna bhari-bhari jwellery pahane rahti ho har waqt, mera
toh bilkul bhi mann nahi karta... ekdum simple rahti hoon main.."bahar se aayi 3-4
aurato me se ek boli..
aur ye sunte hee main bola

486
"Bahana mat maro aunty ji... Pahan-ne ke liye hona bhi toh chahiye tab na
pahnogi.. wo kya hai na, ki... buggi me safar karne wala har aadmi yahi bolta hai
ki.. Car me sawari karne me use maza nahi aata... Lodh.."
Update-159
Aur phhir mujhe meri galti ka ahsaas hua... waha baithi safi aurato ka muh fata ka
fata rah gaya tha.. wo kabhi seedhiyo ki taraf mujhe dekhti toh kabhi meri Maa
ko...
"Sorry....."itna bolkar main waha se khisak liya...

.
.
"River View Colony wale.... utar jao.." RVC aane par bus wala jor se chillaya aur
main dheere-dheere waha se utarkar apne room ki taraf chal diya...
Room jaate waqt main har un nishan ko parakhte ja raha tha, jise maine RVC me
jaane wale raaste ke ird-gird, deewar par ya phhir ped par banaya tha... aur phhir
ant me maine apne dono hath dekhe... dono hath me A letter ab bhi tha..
"yeah，i'm in my world.."
Main apne room me pahucha, apna laptop khola aur purane photos dekhne laga...
lekin Vipin bhaiya ki shadi ke time ki pics maine kis folder me rakhi thi, mujhe
yaad nahi aa raha tha... aur total 100+ folder the aur kisi ka bhi naam maine
simple nahi rakha tha... ki dekhte hee samajh jaun ki iske andar kaun si photos
hongi...
"Corruption... yesss.. yaad aaya, Corruption naam hai, folder ka..."
MAine folder khola aur ek taraf se photos dekhna shuru kar diya....
"Ye toh behan ki lodi.. jhaat.. thi. Kutiya din bhar maa chudate rahti thi idhar se
udhar..." ek pic dekhkar maine kaha
"aur ye maa ki lawdi, toh randi thi... aur ye mere bua ka ladka.... har samay meri
copy karte rahta tha aur ye raha main... The Most dashing Person of the Family...
apne room ke bahar railing par dono hath rakh kar neeche chal rahe chutiyape ko
dekhte hue.. ye photo meri Mausi ke ladke ne kheechi thi... kitna bada fan tha wo
mera, din bhar mujhse kuch na kuch puchhte hee rahta tha.. jab in sabko marunga,
toh sirf use hee jinda chhodunga. "
Phhir main Photo me khud ko dekhne laga... dono pair sahi salamat, dono hath
sahi salamat... tab main dono aankh se dekh sakta tha... jiske baad main ek baar
phhir se 8th Semester ke baad ki meri life ke baare me sochne laga...
.
Police station se aane ke baad maine kisi se kuch nahi kaha tha aur na hee kisi ne
mujhse.. Pahle-pahal wo aurate jinhe maine apne ghar me dekha tha , unhe dekh
kar yahi laga tha ki bas aise hee routine Visit par aayi hongi.. par wo routine Visit
nahi tha. Wo shadi ke pahle hone wali kayi rashmo me se ek rasham thi, jise
nibhane wo aayi thi aur wo akeli nahi thi.. aaj aur bhi bahut se log aa gaye the..
487
mere lagbhag sabhi relatives , agal-bagal rahne wale log... jansakhya itni badh
gayi thi... mujhe ajeeb lagne laga, mera dimag kharab hone laga... sab log idhar se
udhar... udhar se idhar chahalkadmi kar rahe the... isi beech waha mera Cousin
aaya, jise main bachpan se Chini bola karta tha... ye meri mausi ka wahi ladka tha,
jo mera bahut bada fan tha... jise main zinda chhodne ki baat kuch der pahle kar
raha tha...
"Bhaiya aaloo ke parathe khaoge..."meri taraf plate karke usne puchha...
"Chal be door chal Chini, warna ghol kar pee jaunga..."apna mobile use dekar
maine kaha
"le ek mast photo le aur yadi photo achchhi aayi toh IUPAC nomenclature aise....
yuun... yunn... aadhe ghante me clear kar dunga..."
"promise..? "
"I swear, I Promise, I Guarantee..."
Aur phhir usne wo photo li, jo main abhi apne laptop me dekh raha tha....
"These corrupted people... jabran ka reeti-rivaj follow karte rahte hai... sab
chutiyapa hai... yahi se Corruption panapta hai.....i think, i hate them all"pose dete
hue maine chini se kaha...
"Done..."mera mobile mujhe dekar Chini bola..
"toh kab aaun.."
"Pahle ye bata ki yaha sabse handsome ladka kaun hai.."
"Aap ho..."
"Hai na.. mere sath kuch bhi ho, yahi bolkar khud ko motivate karta hoon ki sala
kuch bhi ho, handsome toh dikhta hee hoon... chal bye..."
.
Chini ko wahi upar chhodkar main seedhiyo se neeche aaya, neeche kuch log kaam
me lage hue the, toh kuch log gappe lada rahe the... wahi mere ghar ke main gate
ke paas ek aurato ka jhund khada hokar khi-khii kar raha tha... jinme abhi mere
neeche aane ke dauran kuch aur aurate shamil ho gayi thi... us jhund me adhiktar
wo the, jinhe mere kaand ki sari jaankari thi.. par unme kuch aisi bhi thi jo kafi
door-daraj se aayi thi aur mujhe aaj bhi waise dekhti thi jaise main pahle tha...
jiska andaza mujhe tab laga jab mujhe unme se ek ne rok liya... mujhe toh pata bhi
nahi tha ki behanchod wo hai kaun... usne mera hath pakda aur mujhe apni taraf
kheech liya...
"Arman kitna bada ho gaya na, Kusum..."mere sar par hath firakar hair style
kharab karte hue wo apni dusari saheli se boli...

488
"Mera lund bhi bada ho gaya hai... madarchod, baal bigad ke rakh diya
pura..."maine Socha aur apna baal sahi karne laga...
"Bachpan me kitni shararat karta tha, ek baar bhagta tha toh koyi pakad hee nahi
pata tha ise.. 4-4 log lagte the, ise pakadne me..."abki baar mere gaal par hath ferte
hue wo chhinar boli
"pahle pakad nahi pati thi... Abhi ke kaand sunegi toh moot maaregi re lawdi...
chhod mujhe"maine phhir socha...
"Arman, ruko... main tumhe kisi se milwati hoon... Nillllayy.. Nilay... Nilu... come
here, baby..."
Ek jhat barabar launda, jhat type ke kapde pahankar, jhato ki tarah daud ke aaya
aur us aurat ke bhosde se chipak gaya, mera matlab us aurat ko pakad liya...
"Nilay, baby.. Shake hands.."
Aur phhir mera hath pakad kar mujhse boli... "Arman, hum na abhi jitne din yaha
hai, tum ise training de do.. ise basketball bahut pasand hai... bolo, doge na ise
training... bolo, Arman... training doge na ise.."
"Ye koyi kutte ka pilla hai kya, jo main ise training du...you just get lost.. biiitch..
with your potato face son..."
Aur phhir ghor sannata..mere ye kahte hee wo sabhi aurate khamosh ho gayi..
usne ahiste-ahiste mera hath chhoda aur apne bete ko leke udas mann ke sath
waha se chali gayi...
"Sooo.. Sorrrrrrr... Sorry... meri juban fisal gayi... fuck..."

.
Main apne ghar se nikla aur us dukaan ki taraf jaane laga, jiski vazah se maine ek
din jail me gujara tha... dukaan ki taraf jaate hue mujhe ek ghar ke saamne do
ladkiya dikhi.. ek mere hee age ki thi toh ek kafi badi.. wo dono mast hilte-dulte,
haste-khilkhilate EK-dusare ko hath-pair maarte hue aapas me baat kar rahi thi...
un dono me se ek ko jo mere age ki thi use main jaanta tha, wo mere sath School me
padhi thi..
"Pahle kaise jhat dikhti thi.. naak bahta rahta tha iska aur aaj.. maal ban gayi...
pichhale 6-7 saal me sala puri duniya idhar se udhar ho gayi... ab toh lagta hee
nahi ki ye mera hometown hai.. aisa lagta hai, jaise kisi ne jabardasti mujhe yaha
laakar patak diya ho... par main is ladki ko jaanta hoon.. bachpan me ek mukka
mara tha ise, jiske baad isne mera hath kaat liya tha aur phhir maine baal pakad
kar mukka hee mukka mara tha, behan ki lawdi ko... achchhi maa chodi thi iski us
din... gaand se moot mari thi us din ye... hahaha.. aaj bhi ek mukka maarne ko mil
jaye toh aisa jor se mukka iski pond me marunga ki pond pichak jayega iska...
madarchodin nahi toh..."
Bina un dono ki taraf dekhe main seedhe, seedha chalta raha.. wo dono pahle toh
normally baat kar rahi thi, par jab main unke paas pahucha toh unki aawaz thodi

489
badh gayi.. is dauran jo mere sath school me padhi thi wo apne saamne wali se
boli...
"Mere jija ji, na... Pantaloon me dress designer hai..."haste hue wo lagbhag chilla
kar boli..
"Pantaloons me..?"rook kar maine puchha...
"Haan kyun... "
"Toh unko bolo ki dhang se kaam kare, aaj tak ek bhi chiz pasand nahi aaya mujhe
pantaloons ka.. ekdum raddi maal rahta hai.. yuck..."
Aur phhir main itna bolkar aage badh gaya.... us dukan ki taraf jaha kal mera
locha hua tha...
Update-160
"Do Marlboro de be..."dukan me ghusne ke sath hee main bola..
Usne chupchap mujhe do Marlboro diya aur dukan ke ek kinare me rakha jhadu
pakad liya...
"Mere ghar me yadi tune bataya ki main yaha cigarette lene aaya tha toh, jo haal
tere bhatije ka kiya tha... wahi tera bhi karunga.... aur chal maafi maang..."
"Tu jaa yaha se, mujhe faltu ka lafda nahi chahiye..."
"Madarchod, maafi maang..."uske dukan me saamne jo chocolate ke dibbe rakkhe

the, unhe girakar maine kaha...
"Bhosdike.. tere baap ke umar ka hoon main aur tu mujhe gali de raha raha hai"wo
dukandar bola... ....... rote hue.. jis-se main confuse ho gaya ki wo mujhpe gussa
kar raha hai ya mujhse pareahan hokar rone laga hai...
"Main bhi toh tere bete ka umar ka tha.. toh phhir tune mujhe wo kyun kaha...
maafi mang, suarchod... "
"Maaf kar de...."rote hue wo bola...
"Aaj ke baad kisi ko chidhayega..."
"Naaaayiii..."
"Good... teri beti kaha.."
"Kaaahheee.."
"Aise hee.. ab hum dono dost hai na, toh is hisab se wo bhi meri beti hui na......"
"School gayi hai.."
"Uspe nazar rakh... chudaane lagi hai kisi se... ya phhir kahi tu hee toh... um-
hmmm.. ahem... sale, in**st lover.. bitiyachod... anyway, mera baap tere se
490
relation wapas thik karne ke liye tujhe mere bhai ki shadi ka card dega... gaand fad
dalunga, yadi aaya toh aur sach me teri beti kisi se chudwa rahi hai... kyunki
randiyo ko.. main shakl se pahchan jaata hoon aur teri beti... "
.
.
Main apni us photo me kafi der tak khoya raha, shayad isliye kyunki.. ab main
physically waisa nahi tha. Ab main single haddi tha aur din-ba-din meri halat
bigadti jaa rahi thi.. mera sharir kamjor hota ja raha tha... phhir maine next pe
click kiya.. aur phhir next pe..
" ye kya-kya photo kheecha hai Chini ne.... ab khane ki photo kaun kheechta hai
aur ye badsurat aurato ke hath me lagi mehandi ki photos... lesbo sala "darjano
photos mark kar delete karte hue maine kaha "sala mera mobile liye ghoomta tha
aur meri hee photo nahi liya.. aisa lagta hai, jaise sala main dusare universe me
rahta hoon... ekat photo bas kahi-kahi dikhti hai... haan ye aayi... meri photo...
isko bolte hai photo... god damn , i miss my room... par ye selfie hai kaun se time
ki.. main toh selfie leta hee nahi... jaroor jab main use IUPAC nomenclature padha
raha hounga... tab ki hogi... arey haan usi time ki hai.."
Maine wo photo ghuma-ghuma kar.. Zoom-Zoom karke dekhne laga.......

.
.......
"Bhaiya ek selfie... idhar dekho..."
"Tu yaha padhne aaya hai ya photo kheechne... be.. jab dekho tab photo kheechte
rahta hai... idhar dekh.. iska IUPAC name... 4-isopropyl 5- propyloctane hoga..."
Par, Chini ne meri baat ko fully ignore kiya aur copy me maine jo structure banaya
tha.. uska photo kheechkar... selfie ke sath Instagram me daal diya...
"#Reading...#IUPAC_nomenclature...#it's_very_easy_friends..."
"Very easy... ?"
"Samajh nahi rahe bhaiya.. is-se ladkiya impress ho jayengi aur phhir class me
mujhse puchhne aayengi..."
"Chal ab idhar dekh... last 5 minutes... 5,5 dimethyl... abey udhar kya dekh raha
hai.. idhar dekh... abey idhar... idhar... copy ki taraf... tujhe sunayi nahi deta kya...
gate me teri girlfriend hai jo tu use dekh raha hai..."
"Palat ke dekho..."
"Kya palat ke dekhu..."peechhe mudke maine dekha...
Gate par ek ladki khadi thi.. jo mast deewar se tik-kar pura nazara dekh rahi thi...
use dekh-kar maine apne dimag me guess karna shuru kar diya ki wo kaun ho
sakti hai...

491
"Tumhe mera autograph chahiye...?"jab mere dimag ne Error..not found show kiya
toh maine us ladki se puchha...
"Char pahle le bhi leti.. par abhi nahi... "andar aakar wo boli aur mere bistar par
kuch documents vagerah rakh di..
"Ise sambhal kar rakhna..."
"Ye hai kaun be..."sochte hue maine documents dekha.. "Rumi Pandey... ye toh
Pandey ji ki badi laundiya ka naam hai.. par ye wo nahi hai... matlab... iski maa
ka... bandook kaha mera, do-do trigger wala..."
"Vipin bhaiya ko de dena... unhone manga tha.. Di....., ka passport me name update
karwana hai... "
"Yes mam.. aur koyi seva..."
"Aur toh kuch nahi.. bas yahi de dena... wo neeche hai, unhone kaha ki unke room
me rakh du.. par tum dikh gaye..."waha se jaate hue wo boli... "aur chemistry me
mere tumse jyada number the..."
"Dekha be isko.. tere class me bhi hai kya aisi..."uske jaane ke baad maine chini se
puchha..
"Hai toh bahut, par aisi nahi hai..."laar tapkate hue Chini bola...
"Shabaah... beta.. sahi line me jaa rahe ho..."
"Bhaiya ek selfie..."
"Hat be.. din bhar selfie... selfie... itna bhi selfish aadmi nahi hoon main ki dinbhar
selfie leta rahu..."
.
"Ye aurat..?"next photo dekh kar maine socha "jani-pahchani lag rahi hai.. Zaroor
mujhse kabhi gali khayi hogi.."
Maine us aurat ko ignore kiya aur next par click kiya.. Lekin abki baar bhi usi ki
photo aayi, WO bhi dusare pose me.. Maine phhir next par click kiya aur phhir se
usi ki photo.. Istarah back to back 8-10 photos usi usi ki thi.. Jinko mark karke
maine delete kiya...
"Ye randi hai kaun... Kahi wo tohhh.. Abeyyy.. Teriii.. Sorry aunty ji.."pic wapas
recycle karke maine kaha "us din ke liye sorry... "
Ab jaisa ki maine bataya ki gharwalo ke chakkar me hum sabko kayi aise kaam
karne padte hai, Jo Hume ratti bhar bhi nahi pasand rahta.. Duniya bhar ke
niyam-kanoon.. Reeti-riwaz.. Ye mat karo, wo mat karo... Yaha jao.. Waha jao.. Ye
lekar aao, ise lekar aao.. Ek toh betichod mehmaan itne rahte hai ki inhi ki sewa-
satkar me gand se dhua fek deta hai.. Inhi sab chizo ne College ke baad mera dimag
chod diya tha.. Main itna frustrate rahta tha ki koyi mera naam bhi le le.. Toh..

492
Darjano gali main use mann me de diya karta tha aur isi sab ke beech.. Gharwalo
ne mera dimag chodne ka ek aur naya plan banaya... Mandir jaane ka...
.
"Lawda.. kabhi kabhi sochta hoon ki, Zindagi kitni aasan hoti yadi isme pariwar
ka chutiyapa na hota toh.. Jab dekho tab lawda.. Ye karo.. Wo karo.. Lawda dekho,
lahsun dekho.. Chatni dekho, chavanbahar dekho.. Sab Vipin bhaiya ki kartoot
hai.. Pandey ji ki beti se milna hee tha toh mard ki tarah milte, aise mandir aane ka
bahana kyun kiya... Upar se itni lambi line.. Madarchodo ,aage toh badho
be...."baye side sar nikalkar maine aage dekhte hue badbadaya "sab saale narak
me jaoge... Ek toh inke niyam ki yaha khana nahi khaoge toh pooja adhoori rah
jayegi.. Vipin bhaiya bhi, ek laundiya ke chakkar me kya-kya karwa rahe hai..
Main toh Angelina ke liye bhi itna na karu.... Khud toh setting jama ke nikal liye
aur main... Yaha line me.. Waise main hee baad me aata hoon bolkar, cigarette
peene chala gaya tha..."
UPDATE-161
.
Ghanto line me dhakka-mukki karne ke baad finally mera number aaya.... Khana
khane ke baad main utha aur tanker ki taraf pani peene gaya.. Par waha bhi itni
bheed thi ki bheed dekhte hee meri pyas hee bujh gayi, lekin jaanwaro ki tarah jo
khana khaya tha use chhipane ke liye hath-muh toh dhona hee tha.. Isliye main
side se gaya aur ek disposal utha kar apna hath aage badhaya...
"Bhai, isme dal na.."maine aawaz markar kaha..
" thoda sa isme de na yar..."maine ek aur baar kaha... par usne ab bhi dhyan nahi
diya
"abey deeenaaa..." maine ek aur baar apna luck aajmaya lekin wo launda jo pani
de raha tha.. Wo sirf ladies ki taraf hee magan raha.. Jiske baad main aise hee
kuch der aur hath me disposal liye khada raha aur phhir bola..
"Arey isme dalega.. Ajeeb aadmi hai, sala phhir se ignore maar diya.."
"Sunayi nahi de raha hai kya.."maine thoda tez aawaz me kaha par usne is baar
bhi bilkul dhyan nahi diya...
Maine disposal wahi tod-marodkar feka aur gusse me aise hee joothe muh wapas
Car ki taraf chal diya.. Main jaise waha se door ja raha tha mera gussa badhta ja
raha tha ki madarchod, seene me ek billa laga ke sala khud ko hero samajh raha
hai.. main peechhe muda aur wapas tanker ki taraf badha.. Maine ek disposal liya
aur jor se bola..
"Abeyy madaaaarchod, bhadwa-giri baad me karna.. Pahle Pani dal"

.
.
Jiske baad hum dono ki ghamasan bahas hui.. WO bhi mujhe gaali deta aur main
bhi use gali deta.. Par gaaliyo ke level me kafi antar tha.. Maine aisi-aisi galiya di
ki waha mauzood aurate, ladkiya waha se jaane lagi aur aadmiyo ne waha jhund
banana shuru kar diya....
493
"Ye itni gandi-gandi gali de raha hai.. Ye hai kiska ladka"waha ikatthi ho rahi
bheed me se ek ne puchha..
"Tu kiska ladka hai.."us-se maine puchha..
"Ye hai kaun.. Kayde se baat kar.."
"Nikal lawda, nahi toh phhir main dayi bhi chodta hoon.. Aur tu be..."ek jhapad
kheech kar pani dene wale ladke ko marte hue maine kaha..
"Tu bhosdike.. Aainda yaha laundiya-bazi karta nazar aaya na toh.... Teri maa ki
gand me petrol chhidak-kar aag laga dunga, gand me hath lagakar bhagegi teri
maa... aur phhir pichhwade me pani daalte rahna"
.
"Tujhe samajh nahi aata kya.. Kyun family ki izzat ki aisi-taisi karwate rahta
hai.."ghaseet karne mujhe le jaate hue Vipin Bhaiya ne kaha..
"Hath hata be.. Public me mujhse dhang se pesh aaya kar.. Warna School me jaise
bench utha ke Mara tha na... Wahi scene repeat kar dunga.."hath hatakar dhakka
dete hue maine kaha..
"Tuuu..."
"Heyyyy..."Pandey ji ki badi beti yani Rumi waha pata nahi kaha achanak se as
dhamki.. Usne Vipin Bhaiya ko hii kaha aur phhir mujhe dekh-kar boli...
"Hello, Arman.. Looking gorgeous..."
Rumi Pandey ko dekhkar Vipin Bhaiya ekdum se shant ho gaye aur jhooth-mooth
ka muskurane lage... Jis par maine socha ki yadi abhi se ye haal hai toh phhir
Shadi ke baad kya hoga...? Vipin Bhaiya toh shant ho gaye the, Lenin mera dimag
ab bhi kharab tha.. Jiski vazah ye thi ki, mere saamne ab wo vazah khadi thi, jiski
vazah se ye Sab taam-jhaam ho raha tha... Jiski vazah se mujhe aaj yaha aana
pada tha...
"Itne chup kyun ho..."jab hum teeno waha se car ki taraf chale toh Pandey ji ki
laundiya mujhse puchhi..
"Dekho aisa hai..."chalte hue achanak se ruk-kar maine kaha" jis-se baat karna hai
directly karo.. Mujhe medium mat banao aur next time yadi ek-dusare se milne ka
mann ho toh seedhe-seedhe milna.. banana chahiye hoga toh mujhse puchh lena
main bata dunga..."
Maine itna kaha aur waha se peechhe mudkar paidal hee ghar ke liye nikal gaya...
gusse me main waha se chala toh aaya tha par aadhe ghante tak paidal chalne ke
baad bhi jab main aadhi doori tak nahi pahucha toh mujhe ahsaas hua ki role-role
me mujhe paidal nahi aana chahiye the..
Us din main 2 ghante lagatar paidal chala, tab jakar ghar pahucha.. Ek toh 2
ghante chalne ke baad waise bhi thak gaya tha, upar se ghar pahuchte hee.. bapu
ka lecture chalu ho gaya.. kyunki Kisi ne unhe phone karke bata diya tha ki mandir
494
me maine aaj kya kiya tha.. Jiske baad unhone pelam-pel meri insult ki aur sath
me ye bhi kaha ki main yadi aisa hee raha toh Zindagi me kuch nahi kar paunga...
Vagerah-vagerah...
.
Bapu ka lecture jhelne ke baad main apne room me pahucha aur pahuchte hee
bistar par let gaya... Main bahut jyada thak gaya tha upar se mandir jaane ke
chakkar me gharwalo ne waise bhi subah-subah utha diya tha.. Isliye bistar me
girne ke thodi der baad hee merit aankhe bhari hone lagi.. sone ka mahol banne
laga.. Ki tabhi maine kisi ke rone ki aawaz suni.. kisi aurat ke rone ki aawaz... koyi
aurat bahut jor-jor se to rahi thi aur mera dil tab dahal utha jab maine ye gaur
kiya ki rone ki aawaz mere ghar se hee aa rahi hai... main turant utha aur dhad-
dhada ke neeche us oor bhaga, jidhar se aawaz aa rahi thi...
"Ky..kya.. Kyaa hua.."gate ke pass ruk-kar maine hafte hue apni maa se puchha...
.
Mujhe ye dekhkar us samay bahut sukoon mila, jab maine apni maa ko shanti se us
aurat ke bagal me baithe hue paya... Jis aurat ki tasveer main is samay apne
laptop me dekh raha tha... Wo rone ki aawaz usi aurat ki thi... Wo mere ghar ke
saamne baith kar, let-kar, lipat-kar Paglo ki tarah ro rahi thi.. Main bahut gahri
neend se uthkar aaya tha, isliye mujhe shuru me bahut der tak toh samajh hee nahi
aaya ki wo kyun ro rahi hai... par phhir jab maine mere ghar me is waqt mauzood
baki logo se puchha toh.. Unhone kaha ki is aurat ka husband chal basa.. un logo
ne ye bhi bataya ki uske husband ki kidney-vidney kharab thi bahut samay se aur
Delhi le-jaate waqt ambulance me hee uski maut ho gayi...
"matlab husband iska mara aur ye neend meri kharab kar rahi hai..."maine kaha
"Arman, behave man... uska husband Mar gaya"
"mar gaya toh.. mar gaya... is me main kya karu, maine mara kya.... Jo mere ghar
pe aakar ro rahi hai... Chal bhag yaha se... aur tum log, jo faltu ka tamaasha dekh
rahe ho.. ye koyi shamshan ghat hai kya..? jo jhund bana ke khade ho... bhago be
yaha se... roti hui aurat ko dekhne ka itna hee shauk hai toh jao.. apne ghar me kisi
ko mar dena.. mahino rone ki aawaz sunayi degi..."
.
.
Main chup tha aur Angelina bhi chup thi... par mujhe andar hee andar maloom tha
ki wo mujhe andar hee andar dhikkar rahi thi... main Angelina ke sath apne agle
session me tha aur ye sab sun-ne kebaad wo bilkul chup ho gayi thi aur uske sath-
sath main bhi bilkul chup ho gaya tha... wo mujhe bahut der tak dekhti rahi,
ghoorti rahi, mann hee mann me dhikkarti rahi... aur phhir boli...
"You know, Arman.. You aren't terrefic.. You're terrible..."
"yep..."
Chapter-41: The Rogue Philosopher *Update-162*

"You know, Arman.. You aren't terrefic.. You're terrible..."
"yep..."
495
"so,you admit that you've done some terrible things in the past"
"yep..."
"and do you regret it.."
" nope." Angelina ke spectcle me apna chehra dekh kar baal banate hue maine
kaha... aur ab ek baar phhir se Angelina chup ho gayi thi...
main bahut der tak apna baal banate raha aur phhir jab Angelina ne apni chuppi
nahi todi toh main bola....
"Life is a tragedy Silva ji... and you must face it but if you can't or don't want to
then suicide is another option"
"What is it..? Your another philosophy ? Kya tumne kabhi ek minute ke liye bhi ya
phhir ek second ke liye bhi socha ki tumne Jo us din us lady ko Jo kaha wo kitna...
kitnaaaa..."
"behuda.."
"haan.. Wo kitna behuda tha...?"
"Behuda...? main toh us lady ko satvana se raha tha..."
"aur ye tumhara tareeka hai.. kisi ko satvana dene ka.."
"six magical words.."kandhe uchkate hue maine kaha...
" Is-se achchha toh tum kisi ko satvana na hee do.. kya tumhe sach me kuch
dikhayi-sunayi nahi deta... Tumhe ratti bhar bhi andaza hai ki tumne kya kiya
tha.."
"Maine jo kaha wo mujhe kahna hee tha... Kyunki uske rone ki aawaz mere dimag
ki nashe fad rahi thi... Uski aawaz un-jheleble thi... Actually mujhe bahut bura laga
tha... Itna jyada ki main wo kahne ke liye mazboor ho gaya..."
"Kya...? Ye main kya sun rahi hoon... Mujhe toh laga tha ki tumhe kuch fark nahi
padta..."
"Fark padta hai, par main kisi ko batata nahi... Ye kala maine.. bachpan me seekhi
thi. Main shuruat se hee bahut sensitive type insaan tha.. Matlab jiska dil bahut
kamjor hota hai, us type ka insaan.. Mujhe har chhoti se chhoti buri chiz buri lagti
hai, phhir chahe wo jaydad ke lalach me lad rahe do bhai hee kyun na ho... Phhir
chahe platform par bheekh magta hua koyi bhikhari hee kyun na ho... ye sab
chhoti-chhoti buri chize mujhe bahut pareshan karti thi... mere bachpan ka hee ek
wakya hai.. main jis oor se school Jata tha, waha us samay beech market me ek
nayi Dukan khuli thi... Dukan kholne wale ek goonge dampatti the.. matlab kya
jodi thi dono ki.. Husband bhi goonga aur uski wife bhi goongi.. unka ek 20-21 saal
ka ladka tha, wo bhi goonga hee tha ya phhir shayad bahra tha.. mujhe exactly
kuch yaad nahi... Unhone Jis area me apni Dukan kholi thi, waha already kayi
496
badi-badi dukane thi aur unke grahak pahle se fix the.. Jiska nateeza ye hua ki in
goonge family ki Dukan super flop..... maine kabhi bhi unke Dukan par ek bhi
customer ko nahi dekha... wo goongo ki family hamesha Dukan ke us paar se is
paar logo ko sadak par chalte hue dekha karte the.. Logo ko dusare dukano me
jaate hue dekha karte the.. Zara socho wo kya sochte rahe honge... Yahi soch-soch
kar main din-bhar... Raat-bhar pareshan raha karta tha.. unki shakl mere aankho
ke saamne har waqt naachte rahti thi... Maine apne ghar me kaha bhi ki wo us
Dukan se saaman le.. becharo ki kuch toh kamayi-dhamayi hogi.. Jis-par mere
gharwalo ne kaha ki unhe us-se kya matlab... unki bikri ho chahe na ho... unhone
unka theka leke rakha hai kya... main shant ho gaya aur phhir ek din maine unki
Dukan ke samne bahut se logo ko khada hua paya...
Main kafi khush hua ye dekh-kar aur khushi-khushi me jab main unki Dukan ki
taraf gaya toh meri saari Khushi.. Mera sara sukoon hawa me udd gaya.. wo bahut
se log Jo waha khade the wo waha in gungo ke customer nahi the.. Balki waha
tamasha dekhne ke liye khade the aur tamasha ye tha ki in teeno ko kal raat kuch
choro ne chori karne ke baad unhe dukan ke sath zinda jala diya tha aur unki
adhjali laash mere aankho ke saamne padi thi... in teeno ki dead body dekhte hee
mera bheja khisak gaya.. matlab aisa laga jaise koyi mere dil aur dimag ko noch
raha ho..
Main kayi din tak is sadme me raha... har samay mere dil aur dimag me wo gunge
ki family.. Unki adhjali laash ghoomte rahti... maine bahut koshish ki unko
bhoolne ki par main unhe bhool hee nahi pa raha tha. main us samay chhota tha,
maine jyada duniya dekhi nahi thi.. isliye main har samay yahi socha rahta ki koyi
itna nirdayi kaise ho sakta hai.. apne inhi khayalo me duba main ek din school se
ghar laut raha tha aur raaste me unki dukan padi... "
"Inke sath bahut galat hua Arman.. Becharo ne pura paisa is Dukan me laga diya
tha.. ghar.. Jameen sab bech-bach ke ye dukan kholi thi... suna hai inki do beti bhi
hai.."Varun dukan ke saamne ruk-kar dukan ki oor dekhte hue bola...
"Mat bata be... bura lagta hai.. Waise chutiya the sale... maha chutiya.."
Aur usi waqt jab maine in mare hue gungo ko chutiya kaha toh usne mujhe andar
se strike kiya... mujhe andar hee andar bahut acha feel hua. Mujhe bilkul bhi bura
nahi laga.. Jiske baad maine unhe aur bura-bhala kaha... bhar-bhar ke gaaliya di..
Main jaise-jaise unhe gaaliya deta.. unka mazak udata waise-waise mere kaleje ko
thandak mil rahi thi... Mujhe achchha mahsoos ho raha tha... isliye ise maine jaari
rakha...
"Varun, wo gunge.. Sale.. Kaise baklolo ki tarah apne dukan me baithkar aane-
jaane wale.... sabhi logo ko dekhte rahte the.. Phhir bhi koyi unki dukan me mootne
tak nahi aata tha... Achchha hua mar gaye sale, Warna bhookhe tadap-tadap ke
marte... aur jin logo ne in teeno ko zinda jalaya... Unhone bahut punya ka kaam
kiya hai... unhe moksha milega... "
Aur phhir Us din maine ek trick develop ki.. Ki.. Jo chiz buri lagti hai, uska mazak
udana chalu kar do... Phhir wo buri nahi lagti aur bura wo maanta hai... Jiske
pass... Anyway.. leave it..."

497
Main waha se utha aur bahar nikal aaya... Par main thodi der chalne ke baad
wapas muda aur Angelina ke office ke bahar khada ho gaya...
"I never seen a guy like him.. He's insane... arid... You should cancel his all next
sessions... Diii"
"I hate him,too... but i like his stories.. Don't you...? Arman... Arid Arman... A
prissy and emotionless creature of god. Excessively fastidious and easily
disgusted....why the hell god created him ?"
.
"Arid Arman... What a title given by that ordinary 3-dimensional assistant.. Ek
story is title pe bhi ho jaye, kya "Sochte hue main hospital se bahar nikla...
Hospital ke bahar booking ki talaash me laar tapkate hue khade auto walo me se
ek ko bulaya aur RVC me mujhe jaha utarna tha waha ka address dekar baith gaya
aur auto me hee so gaya....
.
thodi der baad jhatke ke sath achanak utha...
"Kyaa hua.. be.. Aise auto chalata hai..."
"Arey saamne log-bag khade hai.. Ab unpar chadha Du kya... ruko do minute.. abhi
side se nikalta hoon.."
Itna bolkar autowala idhar-udhar handle ghuma-ghuma kar auto nikalne laga...
Jaha se aage maine wo reason dekha jiski vazah se waha kuch log khade the..
Waha sadak par ek aadmi daru peekar beech sadak me audha leta hua tha... Main
abhi-abhi achanak neend se jaga tha.. Isliye main dhang se us sadak par pade
shaks ko nahi dekh paya..
"Tu ise jaanta hai kya...? dekh tujhe hath dikha raha hai.."
"Arey aise daru peekar raat ko hath dikhane wale hazaro milte hai mujhe... Salo ko
yahi nahi pata hota ki.. Jaana kaha hai. do ghanta jakk-bikk.. Jakk-bikk karte
rahte hai... Bhosdiwalo ko uda dena chahiye... Nagpur me aadhe accident,
madarchod inhi daruo ki vazah se hote hai..."
Update-163
"Teen plate samosa bana ke... Aur ek sath mat lana.. bezzati hoti hai.. Mobile me
timer set kar le.. har 5 minute ke interval me next plate le aana... chal bhag aur
daud ke laa.."
Maine order diya aur MBD Restaurant ke andar wahi aas-paas ka mahol taakne
laga.. mere peechhe.. Matlab S-E me approximately S40°E ke par ek group tha... jo
kafi enjoy kar rahe the. Main peechhe muda toh nahi.. par mera pura dhyan unpar
tha.. kyunki Us group me ladkiya thi aur ek mutth-manav ise kaise ignore kar
sakta hai...
"Superb buddy... U.S.A... We want partyyy !... we want partyyy !... Come on guys...
Be with me.. We want party.. We want party... yaaayy... ooohhhhh "

498
"We want party..."wo sab ek sath cheekhe...
"mar jao bhosdike... Sale gay.... tum sabki maa ko chod dalu..."maine socha... par
phhir mujhe dhyan aaya ki, abki baar maine socha nahi balki kaha hai.. Ye baat
alag hai ki wo mujhe sun nahi paye...
.
teen plate samosa back to back khane ke baad main Charlie Chaplin ke mafiq stick
ghumakar mera joota hai japani, patloon hindustani.... gaate hue waha se bahar
nikla...
U.S.A. and party... Kafi gahra rishta hai mera in do words se... Kyunki Vipin
bhaiya ki U.S.A. me job lagne ki party mere bhi ghar me hui thi.. bahut alishan
party... matlab behanchod.. Koyi hadd nahi.... waisi party...
"Hello.."main abhi apne family ke baare me sochte hue bahar nikal hee raha tha ki
MBD Restaurant se thodi door par scooty me sawar ek ladki mere taraf hath dikha-
kar chillayi...
"Ab ye kaun hai..."bolte hue maine aas-paas ke ped me wo nishan dekhne laga.. Jo
maine ye confirm karne ke liye banaya tha ki.. Main isi universe me hoon ya kahi
aur...
"Hoon toh main apni hee duniya me.. Phhir ye burchatti kaun hai.."
Maine us ladki ki taraf dekha, wo scooty me baithi hui, Apni scooty ko aage-
peechhe kar rahi thi... uski scooty MBD ke bahar ek gaddhe me phas gayi thi jise
wo scooty ki seat par apni gand se pura jor lagakar scooty ko aage-peechhe karke
bahar nikalne ka prayas kar rahi thi..
"aisa karte waqt zaroor uske bur me pani aa gaya hoga... vishwas na ho toh jaake
check kar le..." maine aisa soch aur is dauran Usne mujhe ek aur baar aawaz di..
"Aapko hee bula rahi hoon... Please help me.."
"Help aur main... Hahahaha..."
mann hee mann dahad maarkar haste hue main us ladki ke paas gaya.. Uski scooty
sadak ke kinare ek gaddhe me ghus gayi thi.. Jaha se use scooty bahar nikalne me
kafi dikkat ho rahi thi....
"bhaiya.. Please.. Meri activa ko dhakka de do..."
" kaun...? Main...?"
"Please Bhaiya.... Mujhe jald se jald ghar pahuchna hai.. Ladke wale dekhne aa
rahe hai..."
"Okay.. Par uske pahle situation ko just opposite kar do.. maan lo ki main ya meri
jagah koyi aur yaani mujhse kam handsome ladka scooty ya bike lekar yaha fasa
hua ho aur wo tumhe dhakka dene ke liye bulata hai... Kya tum dhakka dogi...?"
499
"ummmm.... nahi..."
"Same answer... aur ek golden rule hamesha yaad rakhna ki.. Boys se help chahiye
hogi toh kabhi Bhaiya mat bolna... Got it...? Now get lost.. I wish ki tum time pe
ghar na pahucho aur yadi gand ghis-ghis kar kisi tarah ghar pahuch bhi gayi toh
wo ladka tumhe reject kar de.. Mark my words... Tumhari zindagi bhar shadi nahi
hogi aur yadi ho bhi gayi toh main tujhe vidhwa bana dunga... Hahaha.."
.
"Chalna Jeevan Ki Kahaani, Rukna Maut Ki Nishaani

Sar Pe Laal Topi Roosi, Phir Bhi Dil Hai Hindustani"gaate hue main Charlie
Chaplin ki style me apne aap me mast RVC ki taraf badh chala...
.
U.S.A. and Party... As i said earlier.. in do shabdo ka bahut gahra rishta hai
mujhse... Kyunki kuch saalo pahle mere ghar me bhi yahi scene tha... Matlab phhir
se wahi taam-jhaam.. Phhir se wahi jhamela ki ye karo.. wo karo... use lao, use
pahuchao... lawda dekho.. lahsun dekho... chatni dekho.. chavan-bahar dekho...
upar se mera dimag aur isliye khisak gaya kyunki us time main DareDevil ki series
dekh raha tha aur aise beech me party ghusedne ki vazah se wo beech me chhoot
gaya tha...
.
"Armaaaan... Stop..."
"Chini tu jakar Khatik uncle ke family ka arrangement kar.. Madarchodo ko

hagne-mootne ki jagah dikha ke aa..."
"Aisa kyun bol rahe ho... Subah-subah chadha li kya... aapki aankh bhi laal hai.."
"Aankh isliye laal hai kyunki main raat bhar so nahi paya.. Mari hui ek ladki
dikhti hai mujhe.. chal bhag ab"
"Arrrrmmaaan....stop"
"Arey, madarchod... Ab kisne bula liya... Inki maa ka..."
"Arrrrmaannn.... Uffff.. Tumhe sunayi nahi deta kyaaaaa... kab se aawaz... dee..
rahi thi... Thaka diya kasam se..."
"Palak... Pandey... "
"Hiii..."
"bye, Main bahut jaldi me hoon.. Mujhe urgently kahi jaana hai..."
"Bas do second.. "Apne mobile ka lock kholkar.. usne mobile mujhe thamaya aur
boli "ye ek question hai.. Jis-se related words diye hai.. Tumhe batana hai ki ye
kaun si theory ya phhir phenomenon hai..."
"Tumhare toh chemistry me mere se jyada number the naa..."

500
"Haan toh the naa.. par ye question physics ka hai... Please... Jo 5 min. Ke andar
jawab dega.. Use group ki sabhi ladkiya kuch na kuch gift dengi... 2 min. already
ho chuke hai..."
"Silly girls..."Maine mann me kaha aur hint padhne laga... hint ke naam par waha
do torch the jinhe + se joda gaya tha aur phhir equal(=) karke ek kala dhabba
tha....
" kya hua nahi ban raha kyaaaa..."udas hote hue Pandey ji chhoti bitiya boli...
"Light + Light = black….. light plus light is equal to darkness… ummmn….

ammmm.... Fringe phenomenon… "
Maine answer type kiya aur mobile Palak ko wapas kar diya…
"confirm naa… kyunki wrong answer dene par next chance nahi milega…. "
" light added to light create darkness… The Fringe Phenomenon… confirm… "
" okay thanks…. bye" bolkar Palak peechhe mudi aur khusi…khushi waha se jaane
lagi.. jiske baad main bhi bahar jaane laga… par phhir achanak se mere peechhe
aakar Palak boli..
" Arman… it’s" correct.. i won… thank you.. you’re damn… damn"
" hot...?"
" Intelligent...byee."
Chapter-42: Hireath-2-The Blowout
"Arman, we born alone, We shag alone..."Arun ka ye dialogue yaad karte hue
maine bathroom me sperm donate kiya jis-se mera dimag kuch shant hua, warna
aaj ki daud-dhoop me, hazar logo ki hazar baate sun-sun kar dimag ki nashe fatne
wali thi...
Us din jab sham ko mere ghar me programme chalu hua toh… idhar-udhar ka
arrangement dekhte hue main apne baare me sochne laga ki…. mujhe aage kya
karna hai… ye log toh mere baare me puchhte hee nahi… sirf aur sirf… Vipin
bhaiya ki shadi aur unke US shift hone par har samay utawle rahte hai… main kya
karu BC… mujhe lagta nahi ki… main yaha jyada din rah paunga… kuch toh socha
hoga maine…. ek toh sala aatak koyi dream… koyi aim bhi set nahi kiya ki karna
kya hai... kuch karne ka bhi mann nahi karta... lagta hai sanyas grahan karke
Himalayan me shift ho jaun...
.
" andha hai kya be… teriiiiiii mahtariiii" main yahi sab sochte-vicharte hue chal
raha tha ki… ek aadmi mujhse takraya… aur mere muh se ye nikal gaya…
Wo joh bhi tha… na toh main use jaanta tha aur naa hee wo mujhe… main actully
use sorry bolne wala tha… ki… sorry uncle… maine dekha nahi… mere muh se aise
hee nikal gaya… lekin main use sorry bolta uske pahle hee usne apna muh faad
diya…

501
"kya bola tu mujhe… "

par maine ghar ka guest hai sochkar… chup chap bina kuch kahe aage badh gaya…
taaki mamla yahi salat jaye lekin wo uncle jise maine andha kaha tha… wo kuch
jyada hee josh me aa gaya tha…
"ayyyee… bhag kidhar raha hai… ruk… jaanta nahi tu mujhe… "
" arey… yar ye toh peechhe pad gaya… phhir gali khilwayega baap se
ye…"badbadate hue us-se peechha chhudane ke liye main aur tej chalne laga….
"bhagta kidhar hai…rook "
"arey uncle… bahut garib aadmi hoon… maaf kar do na… aur itna dil me kyun le
rahe ho… thoda sa muh me le lo na"
"abey kutte… idhar aa aur jo khana giraya hai use saaf kar… harami nahi toh "
" kya bola be…"peechhe mud kar… uski taraf daudte hue maine kaha… "gali kisko
diya tu… sale ek jhapad marunga naa… toh… yahi khade.. khade moot dega…
aukaat me rahkar baat kar…"
"sale main itna bada aadmi aur tu mujhse aise baat kar raha hai…. abhi main tere
malik se baat karta hoon… "door khade mere baap ki taraf ungali dikhate hue usne
kaha…
"malik nahi… baap hai wo mera… "
" kyaaa…"muh faadkar wo aadmi bola aur mujhe dekhne laga....
" tum Arman ho…?"
"kyun apni beti ko chodwayega kya mujhse… maaadharchod… naam kya hai be
tera…"
"Arman… main aakhiri baar bol raha hoon… kayde se baat karo "
" arey teri maa ka bhosda… betichod…"
"kyaaaa haiii yeeeee… sabbbb…. "apne plate gusse se wahi neeche fek kar wo
bola… jiske baad… waha aas..paas mauzood logo ka dhyan scene par lag gaya…
waise dhyan toh bahut pahle se logo ka tha… par ab… quantiy me izafa hua tha…
Upar se dusare kone me mujhse kafi door khade mere bhai aur mere papa ka bhi
dhyan us lodu ke plate fekne wale incdent ne apni taraf khincha aur naa chahte hue
bhi…………. Vipin bhaiya aur pitashri ko apni taraf aata dekh maine socha ki… jab
gali khani hee hai toh kyun naa… baki rahi sahi kasar bhi kyun na puri kar di
jaye.. isliye maine, paas me khade ek ladke se us uncle ka naam puchha aur
daudkar uske naam ka enevolope, jo usne gift ke taur par diya tha…wo enevlope
uske muh par marte hue maine kaha..
"chal be… ye le tera lifafa… ab bhag yaha se… warna ghar tak chodte-chodte le
junga… sale bhikhari nahi toh.."
502
Iske baad usne kuch nahi kaha… usne apna enevelope uthaya aur chup chap waha
se kalti ho liya…. par waha se kalti hone ke pahle… wo mere baap ke paas gaya…
jiske baad mere papa mere paas aaye… mera bhai bhi mere paas aaya…
" sale, haramkhor… kya bola tu Bairagi ji se… pagal kutta ho gaya hai kya… jo har
samay bhokte rahta hai… dimag tel lene gaya hai kya… jo tujhe samajh nahi aata
ki, kis se kaise baat karna hai…"
" dekha papa isko…. aur aap bol rahe the ki… main isko apne sath le jaun…"
"chutiya ho gaya hai…. ye.. iske sath kahi bhi aana jana… kuch karna… matlab…
apne gaal pe tamacha marna hai… hata le, Vipin ise yaha se.. warna mere saame
rahega toh yahi par… sabke saamne waise hee marunga jaise… bachpan me mara
karta tha… hattt… yaha se… "
"ghoor kya raha hai be,Papa ko… maarega kya… "dhakka dete hue mere bhai ne
kaha…. "chal jaa yaha se… sale, Engineer hai ye.. shakal dekho inki... do paise ki
tameej nahi aur baat aisi karega jaise Visvesvaraya yahi ho…. ab jaana yaha se...
muh kya dekh raha hai mera...… bhag ja yaha se nahi toh joota utar ke marunga...
bhag"
Mera pura sharir jhanna raha tha… pure badan me aisi kulbulahat thi…mano
hazaro chitiya mujhe ek sath kaat rahi ho…. main apne baap ko marne ke liye apne
hath ki mutthi baandhata aur phhir khol deta…. mera bahut mann tha ki aaj in
dono ko prasad de hee du… lekin pata nahi, sala main apne baap ko kyun nahi
maar paa raha tha… maine bahut koshish ki par sala mera hath hee nahi utha aur
idhar mera bhai… mere baap se milkar meri dhajiyya udaye pada tha… mere bade
bhai ne bhari shabha me mujhe dhakka dekar waha se bahar nikal diya aur main
dhakka khakar waha se nikal gaya
" aiin waqt pe mere hath ne mera sath chhod diya… warna batata main un dono
ko…. ye mere hath ko kya ho gaya tha…."neeche sadak ke kinare se ek patthar
uthakar apne hath me markar check karte hue maine kaha " hath toh thik hai…
phhir mera hath mere baap ko marte waqt kaanp kyun raha tha…anyway... better
luck next time…"
.
.
Jis club me party thi waha se daudte hue main ghar aaya aur ghar aane ke baad
maine ghar me rakhe mere baap ke daru ki kayi botal uthayi aur upar apne room
ke saamne baithkar daru peene laga…
"hat lawda… mere baap ki maa ka "aakhiri peg marne ke baad botal upar se neeche
fekte hue main cheekha… "bhad me jao tum sab... aaj se mujhe kisi se koyi matlab
nahi…. lawda, itni insult… ab toh suicide karne ka mann kar raha hai… ab jake
thoda thoda ahsaas hua ki… Aradhna apne antim waqt me kaisa feel kar rahi hogi..
aisa lagta hai ki zindagi me ab kuch hai hee nahi… Arun… where have you gone,
man... i don't miss you, but i miss you.. i mean it's ambiguous or unambiguous... i

503
can't even explain it.. anyway , we born alone... we shag alone and we die alone...
cheers "
@ 543 -554

Atmkami Ability or Disorder

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ATMAKAMI......ability or disorder? BY SGP2009 [@ 543 -554 ]

“life is like Physics,Sir….Life is hypothesis…I mean doing various kind of things…

“hey, Arun”use baithne ki jagah dete hue maine kaha

“hey Varun….mera matlab, Arman…. “baithte hue wo bola”sorry, woh flow-flow

“koyi mila college me”

“mujhe kya pata ,lawda…..correct answer hota.khamkha dialoguebazi me life ko

“you know…I just hate everyone…everyone…fucking everyone…I hate

“meet my new friend…Bisleri….”

“simple Shipra…”haste hue usne jawab diya

kahan kahan se guzar gia – By Babar Khan

“tu tha kaha be raat bhar….”

“aa raat bhar…aa raat bhar…jaye na ghar….jaye na ghar”jawab me main chair

“are you guys fucking kidding me….”

kahan kahan se guzar gia – By Babar Khan

“Varun…tumhe to main baad me siddha karti hoon…lekin Arman tumne abhi jo

“Goldflake Lite is better…”cigarette ke dhue ka chhalla banate hue maine kaha

“Arman…what the….”kheej kar Varun bolte-bolte ruk gaya..

“interview..”shocked hote hue Varun ne puchha “kaha…”

kahan kahan se guzar gia – By Babar Khan

“oh mister, mobile baad me chalana….andar jao interview ke liye…”dhayi ghante

“Good evening uncle, Main…Main Nisha…”thoda hichkichate hue Nisha

“Arman…church ke paas wale park me abhi milo…”

“one correcton please….mere jaise kayiyo ko nahi…main antique piece

“gand marao lawda, mujhe kya…”

“kyun idhar baithne me kya problem hai…”

Chapter-2 : Tempus Itinerantur

“mera matlab tha ki Shipra,Varun ki girlfriend nahi hai…Varun ki girlfriend to

“vagerah-vagerah…matlab etc. etc.”

“wahi na jo hum answer likhte samay use karte hai…”

“yedi matlab…matlab…innocent…intelligent aur Sonam se maine aisa kuch bhi

“par tumne to mere bare me aakhir wo sab kaha na….”

kahan kahan se guzar gia – By Babar Khan

“tumne just abhi abhi mera dil tod diya…”

“okay…Arman…Goodbye…”itna bolkar Nisha uthi aur waha se jane lagi….

kahan kahan se guzar gia – By Babar Khan

“dekh 200 ka match hai…main tujhe 500 dunga…”

“Maa…humare school ka ek senior hai..pata nahi khud ko kya samajhta hai…kal

“mom…pata hai..aaj match dekhne kaun aaya tha….”

“ab pata chala kaisa lagta hai…jaleel hona…remember , bezzati ke badle

“Maa, jo aaj ke match ka special guest tha…uska naam Aks ….”

“chup ho ja…Arman , warna…sale, patak-patak ke marunga….”

“haan…chal room chal…”

“tune mujhe dhoondha kaise…”

kahan kahan se guzar gia – By Babar Khan

“Nisha…..Nisha…Ni+Sha….Ni= Nickel…S= Sulphur…acha Nisha…Desai ji ki

“kyun be lawde…kaha ghoom raha hai…in awara kutto ke sath…”Bisleri ka kaan

“nahi…”beech me hee meri baat katkar Varun ne kaha

“sun toh le…”

“ek aur baar soch kar dekh…”

“ye mujhe nahi kaatega…”

“aakhir isne mera daru piya hai………..aur chakna bhi…”

“tumhari maa ka 9.8, isiliye main kahi aaply nahi karta…”

“maine abhi just apna mail check kiya….”

“oh…ab samjha….reject kar diya, it happens bro”

“reject…reject nahi kiya be…reject…abey pagal hai kya…reject kyun

“toh phhir kyun itna chilla raha hai..”

“lawda kal ki joining date de ke rakhi hai…khamkha Nagpur ka address dal

“arey wo sab chhod na…tujhe toh khush hona chahiye….yaaaaaaa…..party”

“ye sale….chhote log”Varun ki taraf hath dikhate hue maine kaha…

kahan kahan se guzar gia – By Babar Khan

“bhad me gaya boss…sala takla…”

“tujhe kaise pata ki tera boss takla hai…”