1.

Packing for a Trip

Focus Skill: Independence

Instill confidence in your child by encouraging them to practice independence. Before

you go on your next family trip, ask your child to pack their own suitcase. Once they’re
packed, check the suitcase and prompt them to think about items they missed. Instead of
saying, “You forgot your hiking shoes,” say, “Do you have everything you need for
hiking the trail?”

2. Invent a Recipe
Focus Skill: Learning from Mistakes

Help your child see mistakes as learning opportunities, not failures. Gently encourage
mistake-making by asking your child to invent their own pancake recipe. Have them
write down an ingredient list and quantities of each item. Supervise the process so
nothing dangerous is ingested, but do not interfere. Even if your child adds something
unusual to the recipe (like goat cheese or garbanzo beans!), let them experiment. After
cooking a test batch of pancakes, ask, “What could you have done differently?” Then,
allow your child to modify the recipe and try again.

Easy Slime Recipe

3. Make Slime!

Focus Skill: Teaching Others

Children can build self-assuredness and develop confidence by demonstrating newly-

learned skills when interacting with others. Give your child a chance to impress their
friends and have fun by teaching them to build “slime” (a gooey substance that can be
stretched or molded). Start by giving your child a recipe for “slime” and have them
follow directions without your help. Once your child has concocted their slime, ask them
to explain the process to you. Then, invite friends over! Have your child demonstrate the
slime-making process before everyone tries it for themselves.

4. Chore with a Purpose

Focus Skill: Care of Environment

Taking on a consistent chore can be a huge responsibility. In order to promote your

child’s confidence in their ability to care for their environment, have them pick out a
special chore. They could be in charge of watering the plants, walking the dog, or
sweeping the floor. Compliment them for good, consistent behavior with specific praises
such as, “The plants look nice and healthy because you’ve been watering them regularly”
or “Thank you for walking the dog every day. I know he enjoys it!”

5. Float Your Boat

Focus Skill: Problem-Solving

Problem-solving is one of the best self esteem activities. Give your child an open-ended
challenge and let them brainstorm ways to create solutions. One great exercise is to give
your kid several items from the recycling bin—milk jugs, cans, cardboard, glass jars—
and challenge them to build a boat. Provide tape, glue, string…and nothing else! Let
them experiment with different ways to put together their boat. Then test their creation in
a lake or pond. This is also an excellent group activity.

6. Serve a Snack
Focus Skill: Multi-Step Planning

Develop your child’s confidence in their cognitive skills by giving them a multi-step
challenge. Ask them to plan, prepare and serve a snack (or a lunch, for older children).
This task forces your little one to think about many different things at once: what to
serve, how to prepare the food, how to set the table, etc. This activity encourages multi-
step planning and gives them the confidence that they can solve an open-ended challenge.
7. Open up a dialogue and be a role model.
Talk to your child not only about her learning and thinking differences, but also about
things you find challenging and have to work to overcome. It’s good for your child to
hear you talk about how you value your own strengths, while also acknowledging your
weaknesses.

For example, if you have weak working memory, it’s OK to mention it: “I can’t
remember the items on the grocery list.” But try to pair that statement with something
that emphasizes your problem-solving skills: “Next time I’ll use my phone to take a
picture of the list in case I forget to bring that piece of paper to the store.”

8. Provide clear, but not critical, feedback.

It can be hard to talk to kids about the things they need to get better at. But addressing
those topics clearly can actually help your child develop self-esteem. The key is to talk
about challenges in a way that motivates kids to improve without making them feel bad
about themselves.

Positive self-esteem comes from working hard toward a goal. So, rather than criticize, try
offering your child a specific goal to work toward. For instance, instead of saying “Why
do you always leave your clothes in such a mess?” you can say, “Your clothes are all over
the place. You can come back to your game after you put away your laundry.”

9. Help foster a growth mindset.

Help your child reframe negative thoughts and statements. Kids with a growth mindset
believe their abilities can improve over time. (As opposed to kids with a fixed mindset,
who think their abilities are set and can’t change, no matter how hard they try.)

For example, your child might say, “I can’t read that. It’s too hard because I have
dyslexia.” You can respond by saying, “Yes, reading is hard for you, and you can’t read
that book yet. Let’s formulate a plan to get better at it.”

10.Teach that mistakes are learning experiences.

Part of having a growth mindset is acknowledging that mistakes are learning
opportunities. When your child knows that it’s OK to fail and there are solutions to
mistakes, it can help build self-esteem. Help your child find the “next time you can” in
her mistakes. For example, you could say, “Yep, you spilled the juice. Next time you’re
pouring the juice, you can hold your glass over the sink.”

11. Praise your child’s approach and efforts—not just the end result.
It’s important to praise your child. But how you praise your child matters, too. Rather
than just focusing on the end result, praise how your child went about it. By
acknowledging the approach kids take to tackling challenges, you help them learn that
they’re capable of overcoming obstacles. Specific, honest praise is key to building
positive self-esteem.

For example, find ways to praise your child for working hard on the projects she does for
school and for fun. You could say, “Your hard work practicing the piano really shows
when you play that song. I know it was tough at first, but it was good to ask the piano
teacher for advice.” (Explore more tips on how to give praise that builds self-esteem.)

13.Encourage extracurricular interests or mentors.

Finding anextracurricular activitythey enjoy and are good at can help kids discover their
strengths and keep academic struggles in perspective. If your child has a nice voice and
likes to sing, find a choir to join. Or if she’s interested in sports, talk about signing up for
a local soccer or softball league.

If there’s no activity that immediately appeals to your child, consider seeking out a
mentor for your child. Connecting with someone who’s a little further along in the
journey can inspire and build confidence in your child.

14.Point out successful role models with learning and thinking differences.
Knowing there are successful people, including athletes, celebrities and entrepreneurs
with learning and thinking differences who faced similar struggles can also be a source of
inspiration. For example, actor Daniel Radcliffe has said that doing stunt work for the
Harry Potter movies helped him overcome some of his struggles with dyspraxia.