If you feeling frightened about what comes next, don’t

be. Embrace the uncertainly. Allow it to lead you places. Be

brave as it challenges you to exercise both your heart and
your mind as you create your own path toward happiness; don’t
waste time regret. Spin widely into your next action. Enjoy
the present, each moment, as it comes, because you’ll never
get another one quite like it. And if you should ever look up
and find yourself lost, simply take a breath and start over.
Retrace your steps and go back to the purest place in your
heart…… where your hope lives. You’ll find your way again.

After I read that, I realize that I’m so lucky to have

you. I’m so lucky that despite of my mistakes you’re always on
my side to save me, to remind me that I’m not what I think I
am. You always protect me. You never let me down. You never
judge me when I can’t even look at the mirror. You never leave
me. The message on the top is the same message that you
always sent me. The same words that always came from your
mouth about me and about what I feel. The words that gave
me strength. A strength to continue my life without any fear.
A strength to know myself, to be a better person. You always
want me to be the best version of myself. You let me find
myself for a short period of time. I admit it, I found myself
but when I found it I felt like it’s still broken. A big part of
me is still missing. Don’t waste time regret; you don’t want me
to feel that, you always saying that “free yourself”. Thank
you for being my inspiration to be what I am right now.
 I’m starting over.
- A new pattern of thoughts
- A new waves of emotions
- A new connection to the world
- A new belief system of myself

I’ve changed. I want to changed, I broke my own

expectations about myself. I lost my trust in myself. Simply I
lost myself. One week of not letting myself to be happy and
thinking about what I’ve done is all I can do to feel sorry
about what I did. I’m so mad at my own decisions, I’m so
disappointed of myself. I overthink but I realize something. If
you don’t cheat, the world will cheat on you. I felt like the
world try to knock me down and I’m so weak that I let it
happen. After a couple of days thinking and making solutions I
finally have a good-thoughts about life, about what I will going
to do after what happened. I promise that I will going to
control my emotions, express my feelings and learn to say NO
to anyone when I know that it’s not good. And mostly never
expect more on yourself. You just follow your heart and think
of the possible outcome of what you will going to do because
your decisions can affect the people around you. And it can
hurt them more than you think. SLOWLY BUT SURELY!
 A great relationship doesn’t happen because of the love you had in the
beginning, but how will you continue building love until the end.

Hindi mo masasabing malalim ang isang dagat hangga’t di mo pa ito

nalalangoy. Hindi mo din masasabing malayo ang isang lugar kung di ka naman
handa na puntahan at sukatin ang layo nito. Tulad ng pangkaraniwang love story
masaya tayo sa simula parang lahat ng bagay perpekto sa paningin natin. Wala
tayong sinasayang na oras at sandali upang pangitiin ang isa’t isa, ipadama kung
gaano mo ko kamahal at ganun din ako sayo. Mag away man tayo bibilang lang
ako ng sampo at tinitiyak ko na andyan ka na upang suyuin at pasayahin ako
ulit. Pero hindi natin maiiwasan ang magkamali, tao lamang din tayo na kahit
anong oras ay maaaring magkamali.
Dumating na ang kinakatakutan mong magiging pagkakamali ko. Inaamin ko
tama ka, tama lahat ng sinabi mo. Nagkamali ako at nasaktan kita, sobrang
sakit na kahit ako di ko na alam kung paano ka pa haharapin. Kung paano ko
sasabihin ang mga bagay na kahit sa sarili ko ay di ko magawang aminin.
Nahirapan akong tanggapin na nagkamali ako. Ang taas ng tingin mo saken na
pati ako ganun na din ang tingin sa sarili ko. Mas ginusto kong tumakbo
papalayo sayo kaysa harapin at tanggapin ang mga nagawa ko. Andaming
tumatakbo sa isip ko. Kung bakit at paano ko nagawa sayo yun. Masaya tayo
di’ba? Mahal natin ang isa’t isa. Anong nangyari sakin? Hiyang hiya ako sayo at
sa sarili ko. Hindi ko na alam kung maitatama ko pa ba o tuluyan ka ng
mawawala sakin. Pero di mo pinadama sakin na mali ako. Hindi mo ko sinisi at
hinid ka man lang nagalit saken kahit alam mo sa sarili mong may kasalanan din
ako. Mas pinili mo pading kampihan ako at tinulungan mo pa ako malampasan
lahat ng maga problemang meron ako noong panahong yu, kahit may halos
masaktan ko na buon pagkatao mo hindi mo pa din ako iniwan tulad ng iniisip ko.
Gabi gabi ako umiiyak at humihingi ng tawad sayo pero alam kong di mo naman
ako nakikinig dahil di naman kita kinakausap. Umiiyak ako kay Janela dahil
nabigo ko sya at nsaktan kita. Baby! Alam kong di sapat ang salitang sorry
para mawala lahat ng sakit na naramdaman at ang sakit at pangyayari na alam
kong di mo malilimutan. Tulad nga ng hiningi kong sapat na panahon upang pag
isipan at itama mga nagawa kong kasalanan, ibiniay mo skain ang gusto ko. Sa
pagkakataong yun alam kong nasaktan nanaman kita. Pero mas ginugusto o ng
saktan kai sang sakit lang kaysa saktan at iwan ka ng dahan dahan. Habang
wala ka, nag iisip ako. Pinipilit kong maging masaya, tumatawa ako, nag
kukwento ako pero alam ko sa sarili kong di ako masaya. Mas gusto ko pa ding
kasama ka sa bawat oras na meron ako. Nahanap ko naman sarili ko. Pero di
naman ako papaya na mahahanap ko saril ko pero ikaw naman ang mawawala. I
feel incomplete without your presence without your love. Without you! I
decided to win you back. Step by step I’ll try. I’ll try to fix you after fixing
myself. And I will fix us! I know the scars in your heart will remain but let me
fade it out. We will make memories together. Obviously, I’m a strong person
but my life is suck without you. I feel like I’m always floating. I can’t even
sleep and focus on what I’m doing. Until one day I realize that I totally need
you. I love you and I always will. I will not let my mistake tells what we will
be, and where we will go. You taught me how to forgive, but it’s sad that I
can never teach you to forget about what I’ve done because our heart is
capable of forgiving but not forgetting. If it’s my karma I will accept that.
But every time that you will look at my eye there’s always be a sadness a
proof of my wrong decisions that kills you back then. I will never stop to
thank of you by giving me a chance to love you again and to correct my
mistake. I learned many things, I learned to trust in you because you know
many things that my eyes can’t see. I learned not to trust anyone aside from
you. I learned that If you truly love one person you will risk all. Babe you
show me what true love is, you prove that good man really exist dude. Maybe
I done wrong things but I assure you that my heart only beats for you and
only you