HALIMBAWA NG PICK UP LINES

STUPID IS FOREVER ni MIRIAM DEFENSOR SANTIAGO

* “He is so ugly he should donate his face to the Parks and

Wildlife Office in Quezon City.”

* Ang crush parang math problem, kung hindi mo makuha,

titigan mo na lang.”

* “Miss, kutsara ka ba? Kasi papalapit ka pa lang, napanganga na

ako.”

* “Mag-exchange gift tayo? Akin ka at sa iyo naman ako.”

* “Pwede ba kitang sabayan pauwi? Kasi sabi sa akin ng magulang

ko, ‘Follow your dreams.’”

* “Pedicab ka ba? PEDICABang i-date sa Valentines Day?”

* “Ang pag-ibig ko parang langka. LANGKAtapusan.”

* “Ang sabi nila, ‘An apple a day keeps the doctor away.’ Kung
guwapo o maganda ang doctor, ayoko na ng apple.”

* “Good news: Wala ka nang pimples! Bad news: Dahil wala

nang space.”
* “Question: What is the plural form of iced tea? Answer:
Bottomless iced tea.”

* “Question: What is the plural form of rice? Answer: Extra

rice.”

* “Paano mo sasabihin sa kausap mo na maitim ang kili-kili niya

nang hindi siya magagalit? Ganito: Ano ba ang ginagamit mong
deodorant, Kiwi shoe polish?”

* “Hindi lahat ng sweet ay loyal sa ’yo. Tandaan, sweet nga ang

candy, pero nakabalot naman sa plastic.”

* “Mention – Ang laki ng bahay nila, parang mention.”

* “Punctuation – Sabi ng isang bata, “Daddy, pasukan na next

week. Kailangan ko po ng punctuation.”

* “A smart wife is one who makes sure she spends so much that
her husband can’t afford another woman.”

* “If you are in a relationship, stop trying to figure out who wears
the pants between the two of you. Relationships work best when
both of you are not wearing pants.”

* “Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman’s

sex drive by 90%. Ang tawag doon ay wedding cake.”

* “Marriage is not a word. It is a sentence – a life sentence.”

* “When the husband says, ‘Ako ang tigas sa amin.’ He really
means: ‘Ako ang tigas-saing ng kanin, tigas-sampay ng labada,
tigas-sama sa palengke at tigas-sundo sa eskwela ng mga bata.’”

* “Kapag sinabi sa iyo ng boyfriend mo na nanlalamig na siya sa iyo,

buhusan mo ng gasolina at silaban mo.”

* “Hindi naman ako mataba eh. In fact, I’m so sexy that it

overflows.”