Dating Advice

for the Newly

Single

Dry Those Tears and Get

Dressed Up Because You’re
Going Back on the Dating
Scene!

Brought to you with the compliments of:

Elena Petrova
 Dating After a Breakup
Life has dealt you a blow - one that seems as if you might not recover
from it anytime soon. Your heart is still bleeding from the break up and
depending on how long you dated or were married, the harder it may be
to pick up the pieces and start over. But you have to pick yourself by
your bootstraps and get back to living.

We’ve all had times that have tried our souls and
this is no different. When we’ve been hurt by
someone else, we tend to take too much to heart
the things they said and did.

While some of it may have been true, much of it is

simply the hurling of angry words – and even if it’s
true, it’s changeable.

So with time and by getting involved with others, you can heal from the
hurt. Dating can help in at least two ways. Either it will help you get your
ex back if that’s what you want, or it will help you get over the pain of the
break up and put you in touch with “other possibilities.”

In either case, dating new people and resisting the temptation to retreat
into a corner and lick your wounds is essential. I’m going to supply some
solid advice to help you to approach dating after your recent break up in
order to avoid pity traps or rebound romances.

It will help you figure out what it is you’re looking for in your partner and
the best ways to prepare your heart again for a fulfilling, balanced, and
loving relationship.

Know The Purpose for Your Date

Before we dig into the tips and advice for what to look for when preparing
for and choosing future dates, it’s important to take a look at your heart
and your purpose for dating.

It’s true that getting involved in the social scene is vital to your emotional
and mental well-being. But beware of rebound dating - where you’re
tempted to throw yourself into the arms of the next cutie that happens to
look your way.
Getting back into the dating scene as soon as possible is important, but
not if you’re just going to throw yourself into a spiteful romance where
you “use” the other person while you lick your wounds.

Avoid jumping into bed with a string of willing partners because it can
undermine your long term mental health - not to mention ruin your
chances of having a lasting solid relationship in the future. This form of
rebound dating can be most damaging to all parties involved.

So examine why you really want to date right now – make sure you’re in a
healthy state of mind. It can make the difference between a good start
and a bad one. Sure, you feel lonely because of the loss in your life and
have a void to fill, but think hard about why you want to get involved with
another man or woman.

You’re most vulnerable after a break up and are apt to make rash
decisions based on emotions, which can lead right into another foolish
relationship. So ask yourself if there is any chance that you will reconcile
with your ex.

Do you even want to? If it’s possible, then this time of dating is more for
staying involved socially, letting both of you have some time apart to
think things over. Dating can be a help to you in ways that might not
make sense right now.

It can take your mind off of your ex for a time and can actually be the
best thing for both of you. Then if they happen to see you happily
engaging with someone else, they may “see what they were missing” and
attempt to reestablish connections.

On the other hand, if you’ve determined that you need to leave that old
relationship behind, dating will expand your horizons and prepare you
for other better relationships in the future.

A healthy approach to dating is like a smorgasbord. Tasting new

relationships is a normal, healthy way to approach meeting your future
mate. You test the waters with those of the opposite sex through casual
meetings in the form or drinks, dancing, dinner out, movies, walks in the
park, etc. There are no commitments – just have a good time getting to
know a new person with no expectations beyond that – yet.

While sexual intimacy may be the driving force behind dating for some,
be honest and don’t make this your #1 goal. Just because he or she is a
hotty on the outside, it doesn’t mean there’s much in common where it
really counts. You need to resist the urge to rush into the sack for some
quick casual sex.

We all need that part of a relationship, but it will mean so much more if
you two really have more in common than over-stimulated hormones.

Solid, lasting relationships rarely begin with casual sex on the first date.
So think long and hard about jumping right into bed. There will be time
enough for sharing intimacy if it is right for you.

How Soon Should You Start Dating

Knowing when to get involved with others while picking yourself up from
a bad break up is probably one of the hardest things to do. But once
those initial tears are drying up, it’s time to make yourself get on with
life.

This may come easier from some

than others, depending on how
long you were involved in the old
relationship and how serious it
was. Take an initial time out for
reassessing your life.

It’s important to take some time

out after the break up and
evaluate things a bit and not
dash head long after the first
sympathetic soul who will listen
to your heart cries.

Some experts say a month is enough time off from dating. You might
need more or less time.

Just know that you need to have this time to think, to calm down and
collect yourself. It’s really a good time to get with a close friend – a
confidante – and have them as your listening ear. This person should be
willing to listen to you from the time that you broke up, through the tears
and anger.

More than that - they need to be willing to push you out when you need it
or put on the brakes when you start to head down the same bad route
with your new love interests. They will see this better than you.
But once you’ve had your time off from socializing, it’s time to jump back
into the dating game. The important thing is to try to take your mind off
of your recent pain and push forward gradually.

Do it gradually because you don’t need to wear yourself out dating,

either. Set a goal of 1–2 nights a week at first and then see how it goes
from there. Going out every night will exhaust you and make you wish
you were in a relationship again – and you might latch onto someone just
for that reason alone.

Get the Chip Off Your Shoulder

One thing must be said about that bad taste in your mouth left over from
your recent relationship break up and that is - don’t transfer your anger
or bitterness over to any future relationships.

So what if your ex slammed you by

leaving you for your best friend.
Sometimes, life stinks and you just
have to roll with it. Don’t carry over
that grudge into the next relationship.

Each person needs to be given the

respect for being who they are as
individuals, so don’t expect every guy
to be a creep or every girl to be the
type who is going to ignore a nice guy like you for a bad boy.

Treat each person as you would like to be treated. Seriously, all men
aren’t cheaters - so don’t punish your date for whatever your ex did.
And, guys, not all women are clingy, jealous, and high-maintenance, so
give your date a chance to be who she is.

You need to do yourself and your future dates a favor and “flush” your
bad dating and relationship experiences. Start each relationship anew.
That may be hard - especially if you keep attracting the same kind of girl
or guy repeatedly.

And let’s talk about the possibility. Do you find yourself attracted to men
(or women as the case may be) that all seem to have similar character
traits? Are the guys all dependent, mama’s boys looking for a strong
dominate female and you’re sick of this kind?
Are the girls all whiney, insecure types that won’t leave you to yourself on
occasion? What is it that attracts you to a guy or girl in the first place?
It’s something to think about before you launch into a new relationship.

Take some time to figure out what it is that you look for in a partner,
because you just may be setting yourself up again for a sour relationship.

Feeling Comfortable With Someone Who Isn’t Your Ex

Moving into a new relationship isn’t as easy as putting on new socks.

The longer you were involved in the last relationship, the more your heart
roots are raw and exposed from the break up.

You probably have feelings of inadequacy and who wouldn’t.

You’ve just been dumped (or ended

another failed relationship yourself)
and you wonder, “What’s wrong with
me?”

So right here and now, let’s get one

thing clear – there isn’t anything
wrong with you.

But maybe you do have a few issues that drove your partner away.

So, before you make any new deep commitments, take the time to
determine just what it was that might have driven your ex to leave you.

• Simple personality differences - Maybe you just didn’t click. After an

initial attraction and time together, you found that you just didn’t
make a “good fit.” That’s okay. He started out as a sympathetic ear,
but soon lost interest in your problems. She started out sweet and
alluring but morphed in a shadow of your mom.

• Insecurities on your part - Maybe you have some annoying qualities

that undermined your old relationship that may carry over if you don’t
make an effort to change. So, whether you’re a guy or a girl, nobody
likes a clingy, possessive person who won’t let them out of their sight.

If you were always checking up on him or if you were always calling

her at work, you need to work on being more self-assured.
Relationships are for two people giving and taking. If you’re always
taking, then you’ll wear out your welcome.
Whatever it was, now is the time to change those “un-fun” traits and
become that kind of person others like to be with. You probably don’t
even realize this is a problem, so your close friend can help you see what
can be changed.

But let’s not get hung up on those things. Change the things that you
can, but don’t dwell on the things that are “you” that the other person
just didn’t like. Chances are, he or she was the one with the hang-ups, so
leave it in the past.

Remember that you are a one of a kind individual with unique qualities to
offer. Don’t let a bad relationship cloud your chances to carry on and
find Mr. or Mrs. Right. It may seem cliché, but nobody is perfect. So stop
trying so hard. Maybe just being “you” is all you need to do - instead of
trying to be a little of everyone else.

Be real. Don’t put on an act. Be fun loving and don’t be afraid to be

different. Be willing to stand out. Someone once said, “Why are you
trying so hard to fit in, when you were born to stand out?”

Dos and Don’ts of Dating Conversations

Time for some pointers for you newly

single men and women. There are some
things to keep in mind that will make
your dates a pleasant time for both of
you:

• DON’T bring up your old boyfriend or

girlfriend and rehash all the bad
things he or she did to you. Nothing
will turn a date off more quickly than
a negative griper that goes over old dates.

• DON’T dominate the conversation with self-promotion. Bragging is a

bore. Touch on your interests, but give the other person equal time
Unless they just love to listen to you jabber about chromed mufflers or
your sci-fi movie collection.

• DO listen and ask questions about their interests. What do they do for
a living? What are their favorite books, if they read? What kind of
foods are their favorites (dating a vegetarian when you are a full-out
carnivore can be very short lived unless you have other strong
similarities in common).
• DO talk about music likes and dislikes. Explore their personality
through music. If he hates Bach and you love it – it might be a bone of
contention later - who knows?

• DO talk about sports, if it’s your thing. Some people are totally into
sports and some just aren’t.

• DO talk about movies and see them together. But if he likes sci-fi
thriller and you don’t, try to find something else to see together.

• DO talk about religion and politics. Maybe not on the very first date,
but you need to know if these are things that could drive a wedge
between you two later on. You will either see things eye to eye or not -
and since this is a big sticking point for many, you shouldn’t avoid it
for too long.

Let’s not forget the flirt factor. Maybe you don’t think of the following as
conversations, but in reality they are – just the more silent kinds of
conversation. Think about these:

DO flirt. We’re talking eye contact and body language. It’s a fact that the
eyes tell it all. If you’re interested in someone, they’ll know your
intentions more by how you hold their gaze.

Flirting is an art, of sorts. It isn’t just about “come hither” or “let’s find a
room” look, either. Flirting is a way to let someone know you’re
interested. Some do it naturally. Laughing at his jokes, holding his gaze
a moment longer than average and letting your eyes look away, punching
his arm when he teases you – these are just some things you can do to let
someone know you like them.

As a matter of fact, some do this so naturally that it may come across as

leading someone on when all they meant was to be friendly. Be careful
who you “punch” and giggle at!

DO dress to attract. But don’t dress in such a way that says, “I am a part
time hooker or gigolo,” either. That’s desperate and won’t attract solid
life mates. Dress to look nice. Make up and perfume should enhance,
not hide your true looks. Nicely trimmed hair and beards with clean
pants and shirts do wonders for guys. Dress for the occasion.

DO set yourself up for success. Men – girls love it when you compliment
their looks, but don’t begin to undress her with your eyes. It will turn her
off if she sees you moving too fast.
Girls – guys can be sort of slow at first and will need your “help”
discovering you. They may be distracted with another interest, either
another woman or cars or something, so help them notice you without
getting trashy.

Dating Doesn’t Equal a Relationship Replacement

Don’t feel like just because you’re seeing someone else that you’re
ruining your chances of getting back together with your ex. Dating
should not be considered a replacement for a permanent relationship –
it’s non-threatening to both parties.

Yes, there will come a time, sooner or later that you either are ready to
take it to the next level with some form of commitment or to stop seeing
each other.

But dating in and of itself should be kept rather noncommittal. Most

likely, the person you’re dating probably won’t consider these dates to
constitute a relationship. Keep this in mind since you’re so used to being
one part of a couple.

If you look at dating like those sample tables at the grocery store where
you get to have a good taste of the product before you invest in an entire
package, then you can enjoy this time of meeting others.

The object of dating should be twofold: you are casually looking for your
life mate, but you are also establishing healthy social relationships with
friends of both sexes. Because you were burned the first time, it doesn’t
mean that you will this time - but you do need to take it slowly and with
your eyes open.

Be honest about what your intentions are. Are you seriously looking for a
life mate or are you hanging out, not intending to commit right now? Get
this out in the beginning so both of you understand one another.

Maybe they were burned in a bad relationship, too, and just need some
time to sort it out - and you can do that together.
But if you and they are looking for something permanent, say so. Be
upfront about your intentions or you may be setting yourself up for
another disaster. Get out there and meet people.

But go with your eyes open and guard your heart. Keep it light. There
will be time enough to make commitments and settle down.

Dating is a fun time of meeting new people, of trying out a relationship

with no expectations or commitments.

Fun is the operative word here, too. Not that you need to be in a
constant state of hilarity - but do things you that enjoy with someone
else.

A serious lifelong relationship starts with two people who enjoy

similarities together and the best relationships are based on friendship.
Dating lets you find that special friend.

Dating Agencies: Types and Tips

Dating Agencies are a single person’s best friend. If you’re single and
looking for a matchmaking service to help you find a potential partner,
there’s really no better way than through the use of one or more dating
agencies.

If you’re wondering, there is no difference between a “dating agency” and

a “dating service”; they are one and the same thing.

The term “dating agency” is perhaps used less frequently by the average
person, but it is a common term adopted by the dating services industry
as the term “agency” is seen to reflect professionalism and experienced
representation.

Whether your preference is to find a dating agency in the real world or to

use one of the many dating agencies that exist online, you should first
decide what it is exactly that you want their dating service to do for you.

Obviously you are seeking a date, but what exactly are your
requirements?

Some dating agencies specialize in finding dates for corporate

executives. Others specialize in matching people of a specific ethnicity,
whilst some dating agencies will only deal with high-class wealthy
customers.

Of course, there are also general dating agencies; those that cater to
broad needs and who will assist you to determine exactly what you are
looking for. Then there are specialist online dating sites like
elenasmodels.com that feature European and Russian singles who are
interested in marrying a man outside her home country.

It is recommended that you attempt to define your dating goals to the

best of your ability in advance.

Selecting a suitable dating agency to match your needs from the outset
will greatly enhance your chances of a positive experience.

If you are new to the dating agencies industry you may feel somewhat
embarrassed by utilizing such a service, but you needn’t be. Whilst it
may all be new to you, the provision of a dating service is what these
dating agencies do professionally.

Further, single women and men who are registered with these dating
agencies are just like you – seeking dates. Once you take the first step
toward using the assistance of dating agencies to find a date you will
wonder why you ever hesitated.

Of course, not everyone will speak positively of their experiences with

dating agencies. Just like the act of dating, not all dating agencies will
suit you, and just like any business, not all business/customer
relationships go well.

You should approach the task of selecting from the pool of possible
dating agencies in the same way that you would approach selecting a
potential date from the pool of individual profiles.

Ask questions, don’t rush in, attempt to learn about others experiences,
and try to get a feel for how professional their service is as early as
possible.

Many people choose to register with many dating agencies so that they
can evaluate them all before selecting the one that fits them. In the
online world this is made very easy since most dating agencies offer free
trials. Some people also prefer online dating agencies since they can
avoid face to face meetings.
The internet offers anonymity until such time as you finally decide to
meet up for a date and this also adds an element of comfort to the whole
process. Others prefer face to face meetings as it gives them a sense of
confidence with who they are handing their private details to. You choice
of dating service will, in the end, come down to personal preference.

If you shortlist a number of dating agencies a good next step is to read

their individual terms and conditions and their privacy policies. Doing so
can help you identify those who are highly professional and, on the other
end of the scale, those who perhaps are lacking the kind of professional
appearance you would hope for.

Privacy policies are also extremely important since you want to be certain
that the dating agency has processes in place to protect your personally
identifiable information. If the dating agency doesn’t have a privacy
policy, stay away.

Fortunately, thanks to the popularity of online dating the industry has

become quite competitive. Many dating agencies now offer great deals to
entice members.

Millions of people take advantage of these offers every year, and at any
given time of the day most online dating agencies will have hundreds or
thousands of singles online, waiting to meet you.

You only need to pick one of these dating agencies, take advantage of
their introductory offer, create your own profile, search their profiles for a
possible match, and make contact.

You might one day thank the dating agencies industry for helping you
find your soul mate.

I hope you have found this advice helpful for you on your journey to
finding that someone special!

Sincerely,
Elena Petrova
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This free report is brought to you with the compliments of

Elena Petrova of Elenas Models online dating website
www.elenasmodels.com