Trip to a new place with fantasy
I decided to step out of my comfort zone with full of fantasy, but the reality was never beautiful.
By: Natalie Hoi
April 30, 2020
Selinsgrove, PA - Just a year ago, I finished my exchange semester at Susquehanna University and
were given a chance to transfer to Susquehanna as a regular student with a scholarship. I
believed that was the time when I had to choose between the endless comfort of staying in a
safe and secure environment and the thirst for advancement and improvement. After doing all
the decision-making and planning, including considered the most significant concern - money -
and the consequences of jumping into a whole new world. I got on the plane with fantasy and
expectation.
This might sound common with the other international students’ experience, or they might have
the same feeling of reading my story. As a new student and a senior at the same time, because
the budget was limited, I did not plan to spend more years to finish my degree. Therefore, I
rushed all the requirements of 64 and more credits in two semesters, plus two winter courses.
And these were not any of my expectations.
By the time of graduating, hopefully, I would like to share my story.
My fantasy versus reality
Just before the semester that I was exchanged at Susquehanna University, I joined three clubs.
One had recommended me to be the President of the Social Sciences Faulty - Student
Association in the coming year. I made lots of friends on campus, and I was having fun there. As
to say, I considered myself as an extravert.
That is why I have expected to meet new friends and involve in clubs in this new environment. I
dreamed of meeting new friends in class or clubs. We would hang out during weekends, study
together somewhere in Starbucks or the library, and went to the club Trax nearby on Friday night.
The result is totally opposite and frustrating. Neither I have joined clubs, nor met any American
friends who will have night movie together or grab a coffee on the weekends. I have summed up
two reasons that my fantasy does not become a reality - cultural differences and my shyness.
Cultural Difference
First of all, "cultural difference" does not merely happen or conscious of when something has
happened. You feel it when you are trying to speak in a foreign language.
By listening to my classmate, I can feel the tone, but I can rarely find it right and to speak nicely
and politely. In one of the presentations, the professor asked us to comment on the school's
YouTube Channel. Classmates were quite shocked that I could see their facial expressions clearly
as I started by pointing out all the false. I never meant to be a rude person. I tried, but it was too
hard for me to say kind words before wicked since there was too much to talk about. In my
hometown, people used to point out the false before appreciation when they are asked to
comment on something, or maybe just a sentence - "overall is quite okay, but..." In between
choosing to be who I am with a different cultural aspect and imitating the locals to try blending
in, I always struggle.
When you are afraid to say something that may not be appropriate, others do too. I did not ask
anyone about that except my friend Tom, who is an international student, senior, majoring in
Business Administration at Susquehanna University. We talked about this problem earlier. We
both have once felt that other locals are trying to be careful when they speak to us. And most of
the jokes that they laugh at, we do not understand. This situation can really be a significant
barrier between cultures, especially we come from a place that is totally opposite geographically.
Shyness
After two semesters of learning, I believe that sharing opinions in class and among group
discussions is the best way to meet new friends. Nevertheless, you have to approach others first
before expecting someone to reach out to you.
Again, I struggle whether or not to talk to others. Raising braveness is essential, particularly when
it comes to people like me, who have become so shy in a new setting.
I have once made a great process.
Two months ago, just before spring break and the outbreak of COVID-19 in the United States, I
had made a great process.
In a class that contained lots of group projects, after a few meetings and chit-chat, we talked like
friends. One of the ladies who I really admire, I sincerely appreciate her effort. She helps me a lot
in class and always smiles at me. Even now, when we all are quarantined at home, she answers
my questions.
Even though reality will never be fantastic, expectations help me to meet the fantasy in my mind.
And the opposite of imagination, I have found challenges and paths that I want to work hard for
my future. As life is a process of generating problems and solving them.
