! Hare Krishna!

AIT_How to change our attitude, behavior and thinking

14-03-15
BY HG Radheshyam Prabhuji.
Proactive leader:
See the book has named the proactive leader. This proactive is a very important word. In modern
times, it's very popular Word, especially amongst most successful businessman. Some other top
businessmen have been discussing all these last so many decades about what makes a
businessman succeed in his business and make big profits.
Where should be focus to succeed:
So, they found that initially, people are focusing on making money, how to multiply Money,
money, money, money, that was a focus. Later, they started focusing on the methods, skills,
methods, techniques, tools and all these things. Later, they said, we have to focus on people,
training and educating people and everything. But the topmost thing they identified was That the
number of hours per day say how many of us somebody has every day 24 hours, is it natural and
oftentimes the conditions are also same.
Nowadays everything has come from everywhere: western products in India
For example, if you're living in India, those days the people thought that if you go to America
and come up with some new tech from Japan or America, then come and introduce it in India,
then it will be very popular because people in India always look for something from the west.
But now the MNC’s from West come into India. Practically, like I saw in many places nowadays
boards are put up Cambridge, you can get a Cambridge degree very easily. You will need money
that's all. If you are ready to pay good money in schools, they will give you a degree from
Cambridge sitting in Pune I can get you don't have to go to Harvard or Cambridge sitting here
you can get it. So nowadays all over the world, everything has come from everywhere. So there
is nothing special about being abroad in fact, India is going to be economically richer than
America also they're saying that the years to come.
Cheap and best trend:
So, then what makes the greatest change for a person to succeed? They found out is this that I
will tell you what is the change at least secret reveal the next slide. But before that I am putting a
background for this they found out that every company has to produce products. Cheap and best
is the slogan in India correct. Everybody wants cheap at the same time. Quality should be best
and cost should be to what somebody may say, oh you want really cheap. I try my best to reduce
cost but quality without reducing quality but that will take me some time to research. Time also
delivery promise also they have to give. So because of this everybody in India finding out but
one of the things they have found out is that self-change. So, change means unless the leaders

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make a focus on changing their ways of working their thought process, their lower natures, they
will not be able to bring about a mass change in the people working for their company.
Attitude plays a vital role:
Now, like for example, now, we will understand in the subsequent slides it will be more easy
when you see. So, if you put this armor there are three things in this our attitude, behavior and
thinking core thing is attitude, whether it is Krishna consciousness or whether it is our material
success also and attitude plays a very vital role. If you have a highly positive attitude in your
behavior is positive and your behavior is positive.

“if you don't feel enthusiastic, act enthusiastic”

Thinking molded by behavior:

Then you’re thinking also is molded by your behavior. Which means, for example, once HH
Radhanath Swami Maharaja was telling, if you don't feel enthusiastic, act enthusiastic, he said
that is behavior, then your feelings also will become enthusiastic, he said, and then the attitude
becomes enthusiastic. It's like multiplying effect it has these three things can remember the ABT
attitude, behavior, thinking these two things. So fundamentally our attitude sometimes has been
negative coming from certain type of family, and friendships and teachers and upbringing and
everything. If it is so then one has to associate with the highly cheerful and positive personalities
in whose company that attitude can be changed, made a very positive.
Ocean –Boat example:
Just like the ocean can be enemy to the boat by drowning it or the ocean can be a friend to the
boat by helping its sail across and go the other side, in the same manner you will see in our life
also converting misfortune into good fortune is possible only by highly positive attitude.
Somebody can completely turn the situation upside down by being very positive in life.

“converting misfortune into good fortune is possible only by highly positive attitude”

Examples of positive attitude:

In fact, the innumerable examples in both material and spiritual sectors are in evidence to this.
What I'm saying is that
 Vidura was chased out by Duryodhana, but Vidura used that opportunity for going to the
tirtha-yatra to all the holy places and ultimately seeing Krishna, correct no, you will see
that.
 Similarly, Avanti brahmana was thrown out to the house, and he was people pass faul
air on his face that people spat on him and everything, but he became a great sannyasi
great renunciate and achieved perfection and attaining the lotus feet of Mukunda.
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  Dhruva maharaj was scolded, taunted badly by his mother and the result was that he
saw Vishnu face to face in the jungle. And you can give an innumerable example.
 One Anga Maharaja was there pure soul his son became Vena, very deadly type of son
dangerous type of son. So Maharaja got completely frustrated. He took sanyasa and rush
to the forest. And achieved perfection, We could quote innumerable examples like this.
 Pandavas were given so much trouble by Kauravas, they went to jungle and they become
more enlightened than before, isn't it? So? In this way, our attitude, the right attitude
leads right behavior and right thinking.

How do you change attitude: Take responsibility?

How do you change your attitude? Now somebody may ask, suddenly, I will magically change
what I'm supposed to do. For that we have to take responsibility for what responsibility, habits
that are picked up for the careless indulgence and for picking up wrong company. See habits
means I was telling laziness, carelessness or that habits means that there could be innumerable
physical and mental habits.
Physical habits:
Like for example, physical habits mean you know keeping the room clean, you know, being very
lazy or not eating in time not sleeping in time enough gossiping or spending too much time on
internet, you know. So these are all examples of physical habits. Externally observable habits or
not washing clothes in time, night 11:30 washing clothes for the next day trying to put it under
the fan. Not washing in time, isn't it or always postponing and not doing things in time isn’t it?
Similarly, not planning for the college studies and not studying in time, but postponing it till the
end of the semester and running around for asking notes from people. So we could give
innumerable examples, physical habits.
Mental habits:
Similarly, there are mental habits, mental habits are even more fin subtler that nobody can
observe you from externally. But they are. They are of subtler nature, which actually manifest as
physical habits. Like somebody has a chronically negative attitude.
VOICE devotee example:
If you tell somebody that you know, Prabhu try to go to the hostel and bring some boys to the
program. I think Prabhuji nobody's interested Prabhuji you no, somebody say and I think they
will take some more lifetimes to come in any. Will such a person be able to bring any boys to the
program, isn’t it? So that the actual problem that attitude a habit, subtle, subtle problem like that,
similarly, you tell somebody prabhuji the study slots are there complete the studies What
Prabhuji No matter how much I study, I don't go beyond 60-62 max and my other friend didn't
study at all he gets 90. 9 pointers. So, this is a very negative attitude, not willing to do one’s role
not willing to play once part and taking responsibility and center. Always getting into blame
game blaming mourning railing, accusing, criticizing or blaming these are wrong habits of the

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mind. So, critical all critical thinking, judgmental thinking, self-righteous thinking that is also a
bad mental habit.

“All critical thinking, judgmental thinking, self-righteous thinking these

are also bad mental habits”

Take responsibility for habits of body & mind:

So, in this way we can we can have habits of the body habits of the mind. So we should take
responsibility for them. Yes, these are my practical problems, I admit. So if you close your eyes
and sit in one place and think deeply about yourself, who you are, what type of personality you
are, if you write down if you don't know who you are, there is another easy way to know you can
ask your other Friends around you, they will tell you who you are, what they feel about.
One suggested activity:
So we had an activity in our model science in school. What my parents think of me what my
friends think of me what my teachers think of me. Correct. So we'll write. And how we also
know what they think of us correct no. You can write and they keep telling also time to time,
they're trying to change us, but telling you. So it can write down, note down those things. And
then what I think of myself, whoa, there's a big difference between the two. You may say
Prabhuji I'm never like this, Prabhuji and then everybody else is saying you're like that, then
what does it mean to find out why there's so much gap? How to fill up the gap here to find out.
So, another thing you can write also, what they think of me, and what would I like them to think
of me? Understand, that is often what we think of ourselves. Like all of you what would you like
your friends to think of you? Tell me what would you like?
Devotee: Very Nice Person.

“What you think of yourselves should match with what others think of you”

Qualities you want others to address you with:

Haaa very nice person. Now what are they saying? I don't I don't know what it is and you're a
nice person. So you would like to be called a perfect gentleman very kind, very courteous, very
loving, very caring, and very intelligent, very smart and quick in doing things, and super
influential, generous, courageous, these qualities you would like people to call you right? how
many of you would like naturally So, these are qualities which you want others to address you
with.
How to match the Gap?
So again, write down and what are currently they're addressing, you can write down and they are
how to match the gap. There are habits in between those wonderful qualities why you know.
Actually, this, those wonderful qualities are what we are aiming at. But we are unable to reach
them because of these habits in between. That means you know you have these bad qualities and

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change your habits will lead you to those good qualities, correct No. And by change this habits,
all these bad qualities will vanish. Just like on slide what they do one thing they put up and by
the next one comes the old one vanishes similarly the old habits, the habits have caused this bad
description in us. So this bad description can be wiped out by change, self-change.
Do more than 30 days – becomes habit
So, our bad habits may be coming to us because of wrong company, wrong company means,
wrong type of books we read movies we watch friendship and all that. And also sometimes we
have a bad habit but we are careless, careless, careless. They say that if you do the same habit for
more than 30 days, then it becomes a new habit newly formed habit. Like any of you, night a
little bit to talk to the extra half an hour and go to sleep one month you do that. Finished. That
goes tough new habit as climbed on your head, shoulders So similarly good things also, it will be
difficult for you keep on doing it for 30 days after that becomes a new habit for you.

“Bad habits are like nectar in the beginning, but poison at the end”

Observing logically:
Yeah, but how to change our thinking, thinking is a deeper thing right? change comes from
observing logically in every situation. Now we are going to talk about thinking, because
behavior.
So three things that will do
1. attitude
2. behavior
3. thinking
Thinking:
So let us go from thinking, then we'll go to behavior, then we come to attitude, the deepest thing.
So, thinking how to change your thinking, for that we are to use logic he is thinking now? See,
he's putting himself outside himself. You go outside your body, and then observe yourself. What
kind of person am I? You see, he is thinking about some habit. Some bad habit. It is like the
nectar in the beginning, but poison at the end. How did I get into this bad habit? What can I do to
defuse this? Defuse This means how I can nullify this bad habit in me.

Refuse habit to hook you:

I refuse to let this hook me because bad habits hook us oftentimes I want to get rid of it. Now I
will give up bad company and replace it with good company like that he is thinking. So you have
to understand how to think, how to train your thinking. No, this is what is being taught here.
Beginning with habit, it's although the habit appears very nice. Like sleeping in the day. It's

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natural in the beginning, isn't it? But then later on all the syllabus remains uncovered. That is
poison. Correct no.

“You go outside your body, and then observe yourself.

What kind of person am I?”

Getting a habit – An Example:

How to get this habit? I saw another devotee sleeping correct no. He was requesting for a
company. Then I also started sleeping. That is why I got into this habit. What can I do defuse
this? I should not go to that room that fellow everyday sleeps there only if he goes there I will be
here if he is here I will go there like that. And then I refused let this hook me. That means
determination. Now, I will give up bad company, okay, identify even among devotees we
discriminate and associate with somebody who helps us to grow further. now replace it with
good company, now you all got it? You got an idea?

Avoid pre-negative thinking:

Okay, manage yourself talk. See this thing? If you think you can, or you think you can't, in both
cases, you're right. They say, which means if you think you can you you'll be able to achieve it.
But if you are negative and you think I can't, if that's kind of negative things that you will never
be able to. See here. This fellow is thinking like this; I will not smoke or drink anymore. It's
highly positive thinking. Here what does he thinking Oh, before only he is telling I will be going
to the party of my friends. I will be forced to smoke and drink. What can I do already he is
bending down see in mind only is not prepared Yeah, so that is negative thinking. See, this is like
the story of that monkey wanted to keep Ekadashi vrat correct now. What he is showing positive
thinking or negative thinking hmm you don't know.

Monkey keeps Ekadashi fasting- what happens……

You don’t know the story you don't know actually one monkey decided to keep Ekadashi the
next day and all the other monkeys discouraged him and they said Ekadashi if you do nirjala
next day you will die only. So they said okay I will not die I will get the fruits. And so he
plucked the fruits and kept it one monkey said you will not be able to lift the fruits also. How
will you able to bite it because you will become so weak on nirjala if you do. Then he kept all
the fruits and kept it. Somebody said fruits are cut, but how will you be able to eat. You can’t
even pick up then he picked up and kept in there. So that on Ekadashi day after one hour of

“Aim at the sky, you will reach the tree top”

fasting he ate this one by one another. So, this way all the other friends they weakened his

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determination. So that is how this fellow is weakling fellow. See before doing that only one is
thinking one is weak, then how can one.

First determination should come in thinking:

Like Ekadashi day for example, you think today let me do 25 rounds. At least if you think there
is a possibility you will do more rounds. If somebody asked me probably would you like to do
more rounds today Ekadashi, no, no Prabhuji, I don't think I'll be able to do it. Then you come to
16 only I am almost fainted. Then are you able to do? so our determination has to first come in
thinking because sometimes we may think but unable to do. How many of you experience
correct No. Yeah, at least you thought at least you had a thinking? Thinking only is not there you
can never do it in life.
If you aim at the ground, you will be buried:
So Tata made one interesting statement. He said, aim at the sky, you will reach the tree top. He
said, if you aim at that tree top at least we'll be safe on the ground. If you aim at the ground, you
will be buried isn't? Isn't it? Don't aim at the ground. At least aim at the tree top at least. So we
should think. Actually I was thinking when I came to Puna 1995-96, I made one Youth Center. I
thought out of the 10 years, I'll make 1000 centers all over India, you know, you know a VOICE
for every college. So because I aimed at thousand now at least we have Yeah, we have few puna
connected puna we have 15-20, we have in Calcutta, Kanpur put together and we have 70-80
centers. Because if you aim at 1000, you'll land up in hundred. If we if you think that in the next
10 years, I'll try to make 10 probably you make one correct. Now. We should always aim high.
Prabhupada said aim at the rhino that I know he said no. See, Prabhupada said if you aim at the
rhino, even if you tried to shoot the rhino, rhino ran away you come and say rhino ran away and
people will say at least courageous fellow. Right? If somebody aimed at lombadi (fox)
something is Fox other people will laugh at us isn’t it. So this is the positive, this is positive
thinking. This is negative thinking. Yeah.
Rescript yourself:
So manage your self-talk which means observe your thinking. And if your thinking is going
negative re-write it rescript yourself like for example it right on if you don't feel fabulously, you
should tell mind now I'm going to you know, I will have a deep sleep, have a deep breathing and
deep sleep when you really go to deep sleep you see. Actually our thinking has a great influence.
Now this is proprietarily next 10 days I will study everyday 10 to 12 hours you keep thinking,
thinking, thinking Start to do that every day are able to make 10 hours without difficulty. If we're
thinking that 10 din baki hai kon padhega pahle 4 din aram kr lete hai baad me shuru karene, if
you think like that, you will find you will be lying here lying there wasting time. So, manage
your self-talk see why is using the word self-talk we all talk to our self Actually, it's a fact
actually within our mind, you know, you can feel it can get inferiority complex or can be
superiority complex, both are happening in our mind. So, what is the right type of thinking we
should know and we should think like that.

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 “If your thinking is going negative re-write it and rescript yourself”

Behavior:
And then comes behavior is he know Firstly, talk about thinking then behavior then attitude for
thinking you need logic, logically somebody should explain to you why what you are doing is
right. So the thinking then only you can think properly because thinking involves intelligence.
So, if somebody tells see these 10 days if study 10-10 hours you will make it hundred hours. For
one chapter, you take this many hours, you Need actually 10 days and you're convinced then you
can think properly.
3 things to change behavior:
So, the same manner for changing behavior what we need, three things are required through
 assessment,
 determination and
 discipline,
Logical approach for thinking:
Yeah, you need something else for behavior for thinking, you need a logical approach, logically,
somebody should prove to you. Like Krishna consciousness, now you all are able to become
devotees, because you logically got it step by step you got it your thinking was clearly brought
out. So you could now take to the behavior so far, but to have continued behavior, you need
determination willpower is required.
Find your faults and repair:
So that is determination mainly determination for behavior and determination. And the discipline
means regulation in habits. Like identify the right habit, and repeatedly do it that is discipline.
Whatever is good habit, repeatedly do it. Somebody goes in the bathroom and doesn't come for
40 minutes. So what you should do, you should find out what is the thing that takes so much time
for me and you will find the slowly puts soap on the top of the head to tip of the toe slowly-
slowly sitting very comfortably. And tomorrow, instead of 40 minutes now we'll make it 35
minutes I will make it 30 minutes 25 minutes. I cannot reduce anything less than this. Okay, now
let's stick to this and stick to it. And then you find it became 20 minute, 20 minutes, 30 minutes
for three, four or five days. Again, it's going towards 40, you will see that.
Change stepwise don’t jump:
So in this way, when we try to follow discipline, we again fall back to old habits. So don't try to
make big changes big changes are not possible. Imagine the person taking 40 minutes to bath can
he get ready in 15 minutes. Not possible so slowly change little by little bit small-small changes
introduce this small change for one week. Now tell yourself next one week I will take bath in 35

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minutes and then subsequent week I'll take about 30 minutes like that say One month you bring
about a change, try to get ready I'm just telling you an example you got it now.

How we can get determination:

So, we have to be determined. So determination, discipline are the two main things. The two
assessment you are already making the previous one thinking itself correct now, logical
assessment you already made, but yet these are the two things determination discipline. Okay,
how will you get determination any of you quick? How do you get determination?
Devotee: By associating with those who have determination.
okay by associating with those who have determination what else?
Devotee: By reading Shastras.
By reading Shastras books or hearing lectures.
Devotee: chanting.
chanting gets lot of the determination attentive chanting gives determination
Devotee: Make some short term determined goals.

“Attentive chanting gives determination”

Determined goals:
Yeah make some short term determined goals, and then the determination achieves small goals
like somebody gives you hey you eat this watermelon you will fall away isn't it? But if you cut it
into pieces small, small you say the one, one piece, eat and throw away throw it. And do you find
suddenly I have finished four watermelons correct no. So sometimes a big goal appears
unachievable, cut it into smaller goals. So that way gradually we will be determined.

Weightlifter Example:
Just like weightlifters what they do, they keep on adding weight, little more little more and then
one day they become like Hanuman ji lift a very huge weight correct. So, gradually add and see
and reactive people what they do and they're faced with the habit, the collapse like that they
collapse. See responsible people what they will do when stimulus comes, they have a choice, and
they carefully readjust their behavior. generally, I behave like this. But now I have a choice. I
changed my behavior.
Give a responsible response:

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My response, see, yeah, generally I'm tempted, for example, and I go to some smells coming,
come comme bhajji smell is coming into train. generally used to take out a penny and then buy
the bhajji and eat it. But now I am a devotee now wearing tilak and kanthimala everything and
chanting on beads now, they told me I should not eat outside not good. Then what do you do?
Although the smell is going into nose, no plug your nose still he passes away. We tolerate that is
your response, responsible response.

“Don't be reactive, but choose your

Unconscious of incompetence:
So what is the unconscious of incompetence? Initially you have so many bad habits we don't
know unless you sit down and write how many of you know some of your shortcomings you
know.
Conscious of incompetence:
How many of you know if you know you're not correct, no, that means you are conscious. See,
that's the second one. You're conscious of your own competencies. And we should write down
we should never fear These are my weaknesses. Physically- mentally both we should write.
Conscious of competence:
When you are conscious of it, then only you can change your thinking behavior and attitude. And
then consciously competent. your conquered the habit now. but you are conscious means what
You are careful like Unconscious of competence means

Bicycle example explain these 4 stages:

How many of you felt when you first purchase a bicycle You thought I can easily drive it you
felt like that when you newly purchased. And then how many of you realized that it's not that
easy. Correct? Because we fell out several times correct. That second stage. And thirdly,
consciously competent now your father was holding the seat behind and try to talk to you. Now
you can while driving, sometimes you're a little bit not so balance. Sometimes you fall
sometimes you drive that is third stage, you're consciously competent. Now you're gradually
becoming competent. And then you become unconsciously competent, isn't it? That means that
habits have gone away and it has become natural for you.

“If you really want to become Superman, become super

servant of Krishna.”

Another Example:

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Another example, unconsciously you are criticizing, judging others criticizing others finding
fault that's unconsciously. In second stages is You will start observing the words that come out of
your mouth and the thinking process. Hey My mind is judging devotees and I'm criticizing. The
third is gradually you change your mouth change your mouth means mouth the same only, but
you don't speak and then thinking also changes you respect your devotees and everything so
become consciously competent. But occasionally you commit mistakes. But fourth stage is,
unconsciously competent it comes natural for you to always glorify devotees like that. That's all
Shrila Prabhupada Ki..
Devotees: Jai.
Become super servant of Krishna:
So, next time when they come, I will tell you about what is the chapter proactive behavior means
that one slides I showed you don't be reactive, but choose your response that is proactivity
responsibly, making choice responsible response that is proactive behavior. So this is what many
of the business gurus found out. If whenever if you are able to give a responsible response you
will be a superman in your life. They have found out in terms of physical habits, mental habits. If
you really want to become Superman, become super servant of Krishna. You want to be super in
everything. Like one fellow, went to doctors with big obesity problem. Doctor said you need to
relax; you are overloading working. Doctor please help me to relax better and faster and I want
to be at the cutting edge of relaxation. Devotees laughing…….
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