Easy Pete's

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INT. 1955 CHRYSLER ON A WINDING ROAD - NIGHT
Two teenagers are driving: EDIE (18) hair pinned up, wearing
a baby blue prom dress with lace and billowing sheer, and
HOWARD (18), tall and lanky, hair slicked black in a white
tuxedo, bow tie united.
Edie sits with her arms folded, a scowl on her face, staring
out her passenger window. Howard is driving.
HOWARD
Are we going to play this game all
night, or can you tell me what’s
going on?
EDIE
Just take me home, Howard.
HOWARD
I am taking you home, I just don’t
see why you can’t just communicate
like a normal human being- this
isn’t complicated.
EDIE
I’d be happy to talk, as soon as
you are happy to stop moping around
and explain all your pouting. So
until then, can you just listen
like a normal human being, and take
me home- I don’t see what’s so
complicated about it.
The two sit in silence for a moment.  Howard turns on the
radio, fumbles with the knob, gets nothing but static. He
turns it back off.  The two sit in silence a moment longer.
HOWARD
Well, until you decide to grow up
and apologize for your outburst,
I’ll tell you there's a lot going
on in my head, I just don’t see
after dating for how many months,
why all of this had to come up at
the Senior Prom. I mean I know
we’ve had disagreements before, but
seriously you blow up in front of-
After driving through pines with no sign of civilization, a
shady diner lit by neon lights comes into view, “Easy Pete’s
Roadside Eats”.  The lot is full of trucks despite the late
hour.
 2.

EDIE
Pull over Howard, I’m hungry.
HOWARD
I thought you said you wanted me to
take you home?!
EDIE
Well now I want you to pull over,
I’m hungry.
HOWARD
Are you sure, this place looks like
bad news…
EDIE
It’s a diner Howard, it’s fine-
what’s the worst that could happen?
Now for the third time, pull over.
Howard turns the car into the diner parking lot.

INT. EASY PETE’S ROADSIDE EATS- NIGHT

The restaurant is full of a rowdy assortment of truckers,
fishermen, lumberjacks and motorists. It’s bustling with the
sound of the jukebox, clinking dishes, and the banter of
customers. Edie and Howard are sitting across from each other
in a booth, sitting in silence as they read from the menus.
A waitress, PEGGY (50), wearing a pink waitress uniform,face
caked in saturated makeup, begins approaching the table.
PEGGY
Welcome to Easy Pete’s Roadside
eats, home of the deep fried derby
dog, can I start you off with
something to drink?
Peggy looks from her notepad to the couple out of her cat
eyed glasses for the first time.
PEGGY (CONT'D)
You sure you’re in the right place
sweetheart?
Howard snickers and roles his eyes, Edie shoots Howard a
dirty look.
EDIE
(perturbed)
Yes, I’m sure
 3.

PEGGY
I don’t know dear, with that kind
of get up, you look like you ought
to consider the catch of the day up
at the Crimson Canyon Lodge, not
the flapjack special.
EDIE
(Sarcastically)
Thanks for the advice, but If I
wanted trout, I would go get trout.
Now can you do your job and take
our order?
HOWARD
Geez Edie, no need to be so snarky,
what she ever do to you?
Peggy laughs.
PEGGY
I can handle myself sport, but good
try.  I’m one tough cookie, you
know. You would be too if you’d
been through the ringer as many
times as I have, and don’t even get
me started about my mother in law. 
It takes a lot to shake me, but boy
oh boy, she knew how to rattle my
chain.  I should thank her though
really, she got me going back to
church. (pause) The thought of
spending an eternity in hell with
her scared me right back into those
pews.
Peggy chuckles and pauses to see if either of them will
laugh. They don’t.
PEGGY (CONT'D)
Besides, I love a gal with some
spunk. Plus, I’m not the one in the
dog house, am I.
Howard blushes and looks back down at the floor.
PEGGY (CONT'D)
Now what will it be to drink?
PEGGY/HOWARD (CONT'D)
(simultaneously)
Waters!/Cokes!
 4.

PEGGY (CONT'D)
(chuckles) I’m going to do you a
favor bud, and we’re going to start
you two with waters.
Peggy heads back to the kitchen. 
The couple continues in silence,
both staring at the menus.  Peggy
returns to the table, and looks
down at the couple.
PEGGY (CONT'D)
So have you two lovebirds had a
chance to look at the menu between
all your chattering? (chuckles)
EDIE
Ummm… what do you recommend?
PEGGY
Lets see sweetheart, Burt in the
back makes killer breakfasts-
EDIE
Yeah, what you got?
PEGGY
The mountain man mash is pretty
good- it’s hash brown, eggs, and
sausage. Butter me up pancakes is
good, the greasy spoon Americana
special has two sunny side up eggs,
bacon and your choice of waffles or
french toast. Then a personal
favorite is the build your own big
boy breakfast, where you can pick
any five items.
EDIE
I’ll have chicken fried steak with
asparagus.
HOWARD
Why do you do this Edie! You ask
people for their advice, with no
intent of using it at all.  Don’t
you think that’s rude?
EDIE
Well excuse me, I’m sorry I don’t
know everything like you do Howard.
HOWARD
Oh please, don’t try to turn this
on me.
(MORE)
 5.
HOWARD (CONT'D)
We both know you don’t want
suggestions, you just want people
to tell you what you want to hear-
and we know that isn’t going to
change what you do in the end
either way.
PEGGY
Cool your jets kids, apparently you
guys have some leftover energy from
that dance tonight.
The couple goes quiet. (Evie looking perturbed).
PEGGY (CONT'D)
Speaking of dances.  Back in my day
I was what you would call the life
of the party. I’d find some poor
boy with his jaw dropped, and wow,
we made fools of ourselves out
there. Oh, and then after the
dance, me and my gals would go down
to the river, to take a little dip
if you know what I mean. (giggles)
HOWARD
Ummm.. that’s nice? Could I get the
blue cheese burger with steak
fries..
PEGGY
I didn’t even get to the best part!
After one dance, some man out
huntin’ for coons found our clothes
on the river rocks.  Instead of
trying to run us off, he called my
papa! I says to him, why  can’t a
girl have fun around here!
A man hollers interrupting.
HAL
Hey! Quit your yappin Peg, come
‘ere and  poor me another round a
Joe!
PEGGY
(shouts)
Give a break Hal, I’ll be right
over.  (She turns back to the
couple.) One chicken fried steak,
and a blue cheese burger coming
right up.
 6.

Peggy begins walking towards the counter when the door swings
open and a man bursts in; ERNIE (50), a pot belly man, bald
with a mustache wearing a denim jacket.
PEGGY (CONT'D)
Where you been Ernie?  Worrying me
so, you were supposed to be back in
the kitchen hours ago!
ERNIE
He’s comin! I found Sasquatch and
he’s comin this way! I made him
angry!
The room erupts with laughter.  Howard and Edie look at each
other, then back to the man Ernie.
HAL
Here we go again Ernie, you and
Sasquatch again. Let me guess, he’s
angry cause yuh’ interrupted his
tea party with Nessie!
The room fills with laughs again.
ERNIE
This is serious, we’re in serious
trouble!
HAL
You sure you didn’t just look in
the mirror with your shirt off?
Everyone laughs again.  Edie looks uncomfortable, she reaches
her hand across the table to Howards.
HAL (CONT'D)
Did he look like this?
Hal stands up and starts dancing on the table like a monkey
making ooh ooh sounds. The crowd continues to laugh, so he
amps up his dance, jumping up and down exaggerating his
movements. The crowd laughs even louder. Suddenly a motorbike
is thrown from the outside, flying towards the door,
shattering the glass doors crashing into Hal. Hal and bike
both fly back into the kitchen.  Edie screams, and Howards
jumps towards Evie’s side of the booth.
The crowd rises and looks through the now empty door frame
where they see a 14 foot tall hairy monster standing on his
hind legs, and it lets out a giant roar.  The monster walks
over to a powerline pole, and begins pounding on it with his
fists over and over until it begins to crack.  The pole falls
over, several of the power lines snapping, sparks flying.
 7.

The lights in the diner flicker then go out. The crowd in the
diner bursts into screams.  The monster goes down on all
fours and begins hurtling towards them like a gorilla.
The restaurant is now in chaos, people running and hiding,
others calling out about getting knives from the kitchen,
someone says something about having guns in his truck amongst
the screams and yells.
Howard slides down under the table and pulls Edie down with
him.
HOWARD
We gotta get you oughta here.
EDIE
Me? You mean us! Don’t be a fool,
there’s no reason both of us can’t
get out of here.
HOWARD
I know, I know.  But if something
were to happen, I want you to run
and I can cause a distraction, I
can’t let anything happen to you.
EDIE
What are you saying, Howard?  We’ll
both be fine, don’t go off trying
to be a hero now. We’ve got to play
it smart and we can make it out
just fine.
A man flies back, sliding across the floor, landing right in
front of the booth with the table Edie and Howard are hiding
under.  They peek out and see the monster surrounded by
several men holding kitchen knives.  The monster is swatting
them like flies.
EDIE (CONT'D)
Now is our chance!
Edie pulls off her heals and makes a dash, crawling across
the aisle to behind the counter.  Howard followers behind
her.
HOWARD
This may be the last chance I have
to tell you, but…
EDIE
Is this really the time, Howard?
 8.

HOWARD
Can you please just listen, for
once, give me this one thing.
Please!
EDIE
Fine, but you better make this
quick!
HOWARD
I just want to let you know that
I’m okay with you going to New
York. I think it’s time to let your
life begin.
EDIE
What?! How did you find out about
New York? Has all of this been
about New York?
They hear a giant smash. Edie peaks from behind the counter
to see the door to the kitchen, which the monster is standing
in front of.  He has ripped one of the metal swivel stools
out of the floor and is swinging it around like a club.
EDIE (CONT'D)
(pointing to the kitchen
door)
That’s our way out of here!
HOWARD
Yes, it’s about New York- I can’t
let you waste your life away here
in Crimson Canyon.  I could never
live with myself knowing that you
could’ve had the adventure of a
lifetime, and then you squandered
your life away with me.
EDIE
I swear, you can be so hard headed.
All of a sudden they hear a gunshot, they peek out and see a
man standing with a shotgun, he missed.  The man fires the
shotgun again  at the monster. He misses again and the bullet
ricochets.  The monster runs towards the man with the gun.
EDIE (CONT'D)
Here’s our chance.
The two crawl to the door and enter the kitchen, run to the
back of the room and squat behind the cooking island.
 9.

INT. DINER KITCHEN

HOWARD
Hard header? What do you mean hard
headed?
EDIE
Relax, that’s what I’m saying. We
haven’t even talked about this, you
just went off pouting, and I had no
idea why.  We need to communicate
these things.
HOWARD
If you want to talk about it, let's
talk about it!
EDIE
Is now really the right time
Howard?
They hear more glass shatter and the roar of the monster
HOWARD
I don’t know, it’s just been really
bothering me. I had a vision of us
with this life together, and then I
heard that you had the offer to go
out East, and then I thought if you
gave that up to stay with me… I
just don't know if I could face you
if that happened.  I love you Edie,
And I’ve been selfish wanting you
to stay here with me, but realize
now I want you to go out and change
the world.
EDIE
Howard, Howard.  You’re cute, you
know that? But your timing is
terrible.
HOWARD
You’ve got to go Edie, and I'll
always be here, cheering you on.
I’ll be here as long as it takes. I
promise.
EDIE
This is really sweet and all, but
how about we bookmark the
conversation and pick it up once we
get outta here. Right after this,
of course.
 10.

Edie places her hands on Howards cheeks, and pulls him in for
a kiss. His eyes widen and then close and he places his hands
on her shoulders and begins kissing her back.
PEGGY (O.S.)
I think I’m gonna cry! In different
circumstances I would bust out some
pie.
Howard and Edie look up and separate quickly both blushing to
see Peggy's head peeking out of the door to the walk in
refrigerator.
PEGGY (CONT'D)
I hate to break up the party, but
get in here. The door in iron clad,
we’ve got Mountains of food, we can
survive in here for days until
someone finds us. (winks) Just the
three of us.
Edie and Howard look at one another, alarmed, look at Peggy,
look into the dining area, then back at Peggy, and back to
the dining area.
The monster walks into view in the dining area, now alone,
looking around for its next victims.  He looks up into the
kitchen. The two jolt behind the island and in so doing knock
over a stack of metal pans and bowls. The dishes tumble onto
the floor making loud banging sounds. The two gasp, and then
hold their breath. Peggy slinks back into the fridge, closing
the door.  The monster lets out a roar and looks into the
kitchen.
Edie looks Howard in the eyes, runs her hand in his hair
once, messing it up, and nods.  She then grabs a pot and pan
and stands up and begins banging them together. Howard gasps,
reaches out to grab her but is too late.
EDIE
Over here fleabag!
The monster whips his head in her direction and begins his
way to the kitchen.  Edie makes a dash to the back door to
the outside, pot and pan still banging. The monster runs
through the kitchen and out the back door after Edie
Howard stunned begins hyperventilating, but then shakes it
off. He stands up and runs after them.
HOWARD
Not on my watch, buddy.
 11.

Howard runs outside and hears helicopter blades.  A ranger

helicopter is in the air, an animal control man hanging out
the side with a gun.
The helicopters spotlight is shining on the monster who has
Edie held in one hand like a doll.
The man begins firing, the monster lets out a roar and runs
with Edie  into the woods. The helicopter gives chase. Howard
tears a piece of ripped cloth off his now tattered tux and
ties it around his forehead, Rambo style, and off in the
direction of the monster and the copter.
Fade to black.