Running head: ONE COACH, MANY WORDS 1

One Coach, Many Words

Victoria J. Gelosi

Virginia Tech
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One Coach, Many Words

As an athlete, you go through many coaches. It is very rare to have the same coach for

more than two or three years, but I was part of the rare few that was able to be a part of a special

community with the same coach for almost nine years. My team had slightly changed over time

with new players coming and some leaving, but we stayed intact for the most part and grew

together all because of Coach Tom. He was able to motivate us, work us hard, and give us the

opportunity to form long lasting bonds with each other by never giving up on us. Throughout

these eight and a half years, there were many moments where we had no faith in us, but he was

there to guide us and, in the end, we often came out victorious because of his words.

Coach Tom grew up in Toms River, New Jersey all his life. He was always a major fan of

soccer. He played until he went to college, and now he coaches two soccer teams, one for his

daughter and one for his son. He is currently an economics professor at Rutgers University,

which he enjoys very much but not as much as he loves coaching. Coach Tom always told us,

“There’s nothing more important to me than teaching, but I love coaching because I get to teach

but see the actual growth and development of a team. This sport is a passion for me, and I hope I

get to share and pass this along to you.” He got to see my team grow, bond, develop as a team,

and develop as individual soccer players for eight and a half years, now he gets to do the same

for his younger son’s team.

When I had first joined Toms River Independent Club (TRIC) Revolution in April of

2010, it was the transition year of playing on a full-size field with eleven players on the field.

Needless to say, due to us being a very small, unknown soccer club, we had a limited number of

players. Even though we were short staffed, we were rather successful for starting out our first

spring season. We won most of our league games, made it to semifinals in two tournaments, and
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ended the season by making it to the semifinals for the State Cup tournament. By the following

spring season, we had moved to a different conference that, at the time, was one of the top

conferences on the east coast. It was called Eastern Development Program (EDP). Even as young

as I was, I could still see the impact Coach Tom had already started to have on us as soccer

players. He had taken a small, nameless team in a low conference and brought us to a very

competitive division, gaining a few players in the process, in only a year.

Looking back on my time with the team, our peak time was from U13 to U15. During

this time period, we had lost a maximum of two games during the regular season, won several

tournaments, and ranked top ten in the state. It was during this time that our team grew as a

community. Coach Tom brought us to at least three out of state tournaments, both fall and spring

seasons, which gave us the opportunity to bond in the hotel. I feel that being very close and

comfortable with your teammates is what helps build the chemistry on the field, and Coach Tom

really emphasized this each and every tournament, game, and practice. His most common line

was “We have nothing, if you don’t have each other’s backs.” The biggest outcome of my time

on this team is my lifelong friendships that I made. I still talk to the girls regularly, and this

shows the kind of community created for us by Coach Tom.

Coach Tom’s overall impact on our little community was pushing us to work our hardest

to be the best that we could. All he wanted for us was to have the option and ability to continue

playing in college if we chose to, and two girls now have the opportunity to play on the Division

I level because of him. One moment that sticks out in my head where he had the most impact on

us to pursue a college soccer career was entering our fall season for U13. He had called a team

get-together to watch the United States Women Nationals Team compete in one of the rounds

during the World Cup and game footage of us from our last tournament from the prior season.
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He had us watch the World Cup game followed by our game. He did not show us the whole tape

of our game, but as we watched it, he told us about things that could have been done better on

and off the ball. The reason he did not show us the whole game was because he had marked

down specific clips from the film for each player, one good and one bad. He finished each

person’s critique by telling us we could end up as one specific girl on the Women’s National

team. He told me I could end up as Christie Rampone because of her speed and vision of the

field off the ball. At the end of going over film, he said, “We can be as good as the women’s

national team if we all stay focused. I see the potential in every single one of you that can allow

you to go to the next level and be successful.” We had practice less than an hour later, and to this

day Coach Tom says that was our best practice, in his mind, because he saw the fire in our eyes

that we wanted to compete and be successful.

Coach Tom was not always calm when he would try and motivate us. Another time

where I feel he had an influence on us was our last game of the spring U15 season. We had an

away game up in Manalapan, which is about forty minutes from Toms River. During warmups, it

was very evident that the opposing team lacked the skill that we had, but when kickoff happened,

it did not appear that way. We did not look like the same team that we had always been. No one

could even string two passes together. After a long first half, halftime came, and it was not the

pleasant Coach Tom that we were used to. He yelled at us not because of how poorly we were

playing, but because he knows that we are a much better team than what we were showing. He

told us we had no games left in the season and that we needed to finish strong or else there was

no point in driving almost an hour to try and end on a positive note. The second half started, and

we were a completely different team. We finished the game with a win by a deficit of six goals.
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These two stories show the two sides of Coach Tom that he used whenever he pushed us

to be better. Depending on the situation and the setting, he had a different persona he used to get

his message across. This side of him related to the rhetorical appeal of pathos because whichever

demeanor he used to spark a fire in us depended on the setting. His calmer, relaxed, collected

image worked better in the beginning of a game or during a practice because we were not

overflowing with emotions and the setting was more laidback. On the other hand, his louder, not

so calm, passionate coaching side was more effective for during a game because games are

emotional, exciting, and exhilarating where the more hyped side was needed to make a

statement.

Not only do these examples demonstrate pathos, it appeals to the concepts of rhetoric and

kairos. Coach Tom’s speeches appealed to rhetoric because of how he spoke. He tried to be as

effective as he could, which is where kairos comes in. His calmer side was most effective during

our practices because the timing and setting of this was not an environment where we needed to

be fired up. The more passionate, louder quality was effective during games because the timing

of this was necessary. We were filled with emotions and energy, and halftime, especially, was

the deciding factor where Coach Tom needed to keep the momentum going. With this said, the

rhetorical appeal of logos is shown as well. He had to think of the proper way to phrase

everything he said to us. Logically, he not only had to phrase his talks properly based on tone but

also with context. He could not show up to a practice and say, “I want you to go as hard as you

possibly could to injure yourself and your teammates”, or while at a game say, “It’s fine, don’t

work hard. There’s no reason to try.” He had to use his words sensibly to be most effective

depending on the time and place we were at.

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While processing what he had to say to us, Coach Tom had to consider not just the

rhetorical appeals mentioned but situational concepts such as audience, purpose, and, again,

context. He always had to remember his audience was my team as a whole, but also there could

be parents that are nearby listening to his speech. He could not go off the rails and have a curse

word coming out of his mouth constantly and had to stay on track with what mattered to us,

which was how we can improve ourselves and be successful. Coach Tom understood that, and he

always stuck to what his purpose of his talk was. He expressed it immediately to keep us focused

and get his point across. The context followed with the purpose needed to be relative to our

situation. If we were at a practice, he needed to talk about the upcoming game by including the

strategy, what we needed to improve on from the previous game and teach us how to defend

effectively against our opponent. During a game, his context needed to include what had to be

done in the moment. Coach Tom understood how to get his point across successfully by always

focusing on just us as his audience, telling us the purpose immediately, and with staying in

context of the situation, and we ended up achieving a number of victories because of this.

Soccer knowledge only comes after playing or watching the sport extensively, and Coach

Tom has a strong passion for this sport. As mentioned earlier, he played almost his whole life

and now coaches to pass off all he knows and loves about soccer. This all appeals to the final

rhetorical concept of ethos. Coach Tom’s credibility has built up from his experience of playing

himself, watching professional soccer games regularly, and presently coaching. He always told

us that watching a professional game gives us the best view of what “pretty” soccer is supposed

to look like, and you learn something new each game you watch. His passion for this sport gives

him ethos and makes him the best person to be a coach. He dedicated an unthinkable amount of

time and energy to coaching my team and his son’s team. The best example of his success is the
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fact that TRIC Revolution considers my team to be the best, most successful team ever affiliated

with the club. They had a meeting just to congratulate Coach Tom for all of his success with my

team after announcing my team has officially folded.

Soccer was one area where Coach Tom had left an impression on me. He instilled the

principles of punctuality, strong work ethic, and attentive to details that have carried over into

my everyday life. There was never a time that Coach Tom did not stress the importance of being

on time. He always said that “showing up right when you are supposed to be there is being late”.

To this day, I strive to show up early everywhere I go. Along with being on time, working hard

and setting goals has become a major part of my work ethic. I have used these strategies

specifically when it came to school. I set goals for myself beginning of high school to get into

any college I could want, and I was lucky enough to achieve this. This approach has continued

over into college as well. Lastly, being detail oriented has carried over into my schoolwork too.

This attribute helps me focus on my work and allow me to produce the best work I believe I can.

Overall, Coach Tom implanted these beliefs into us when it came to soccer, but I have used them

in other parts of my life. I have achieved so many amazing triumphs in my life that have gotten

me to where I am today, where it is finally paying off and allowing me to continue being

successful.

Coach Tom had made an impact on not only me, but my teammates as well. By the time

all of us had reached high school, we made the Varsity team by freshman or sophomore year.

Additionally, when it was time to figure out college, all of us had at least one offer to play

somewhere. As said earlier, there was a total of two of us that went on to play Division I soccer.

One plays for Stevens Institute of Technology almost on a full ride, and the other one plays for

Wagner College in Staten Island. There were a couple more of us who had the opportunity to
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play at the Division I or II level, including me, but chose not to due to injuries that would have

required surgery to fix. Coach Tom had not only given us the opportunity to play at the next

level, but he gifted us with the chance to make memories whether it was playing Varsity soccer

on our various high school teams or playing together at a tournament. We have long-lasting

memories and friendships all because he worked and dedicated so much time to us. His words

spoke volumes when they needed to, and with them, we were able to accomplish many things,

both personal and as a team.