trends
social
life
t
in motion
childless… or childfree?
by amy blackstone
Consider the following comments, the
first from Bob, a partnered, childfree man
in his late 30s, “People who have decided
not to have kids arguably have been more
thoughtful than those who decided to
have kids. It’s deliberate, it’s respectful,
ethical, and it’s a real honest, good, fair,
and, for many people, right decision.”
And Janet, a single childfree woman
in her early 30s remarks, “To get where
we are has been a constant decision mak-
ing process because every relationship
you enter into, especially romantically,
that’s the expected thing. You’re con-
stantly making a decision about remain-
ing childfree.”
For Bob and Janet, not having chil-
dren is neither fate nor accident. It is a
deliberate choice they must re- articulate
each time they enter new relationships,
field questions about their family status,
and when reminded by well-meaning folks
Studies that do not ask about choice but use
the term “childless” conflate those who want
kids and those who do not.
that they need to provide grandchildren
for their parents. Although much recent
media and research attention has focused
on the increase in child-raising trends
among single women, lesbians, and gay
men, more people than ever aren’t rais-
ing children at all. Bob and Janet are 2 of
the 45 interview participants in my study
of childfree adults. They are among an
increasing number of people in the United
States who have opted out of parenthood.
68 contexts.org
In considering this “emerging child-
free movement,” as sociologist Kristin
Park once described it, one question is
whether people are making a conscious
choice to opt out of parenthood (the
childfree) or whether they want chil-
dren but do not have them (the child-
less). Birthrates, often cited in news
stories about the childfree, do not tell
us whether those not bearing children
intentionally chose this outcome nor do
they take into account adoption patterns.
The language in many research studies
further confounds the issue. Studies that
do not ask about choice but use the term
“childless” conflate those who want kids
and those who do not (perhaps indicative
of the normative expectation that one
should want children).
Researchers at the National Survey
of Family Growth address this challenge
by measuring birth desire, asking respon-
dents if they want a baby at some point.
Yet a problem with this approach is that
desires do not always match outcomes.
Other researchers sub-categorize non-
parents as either “early articulators”
who know from an early age that they
do not want kids, or “postponers” who
put off deciding until their childbear-
ing years have passed. Of course, not
all postponers are alike; some identify
as childless, others as childfree. Despite
© 2013 Time, Inc.
Childfree couples are the increasing
focus of media attention.
these methodological challenges, we do
know that fewer Americans are having
children today than in the past.
who doesn’t have kids and why
Whether by choice or by circum-
stance, birth rates have declined signifi-
cantly over the last 40 years. In the United
States, the percentage of women who
have not given birth by their 40s has
nearly doubled since 1976, when 10 per-
cent of women had never given birth by
their 40s. The technical term for this is
“nulliparous.” A 2013 Centers for Dis-
ease Control report notes the total U.S.
fertility rate has been below the popula-
tion replacement rate of 2.1 children per
woman since 1971.
Data from the 2010 Current Popu-
lation Survey show that 19.1 percent
of white women, 17.2 percent of black
women, and 15.9 percent of Asian
women ages 40-44 did not have children.
Much of what we know about
non-parents comes from studies that,

unfortunately, do not differentiate
between the childless and the childfree.
From these studies we know that non-
parents (including childless and childfree)
are more heavily concentrated in pro-
fessional and managerial occupations.
Also, non-parent couples are, on aver-
age, more highly educated, less religious,
more likely to live in urban areas, and
hold less traditional beliefs about gender
roles than couples with kids.
Studies that focus on the child-
free specifically, find several differences
between women and men. For childfree
women, the choice not to parent is often
linked to the desire to develop meaning-
ful careers. Men identifying as childfree
cite the high cost of rearing children and
a desire for financial flexibility as impor-
tant to their decision. Childfree men and
women also differ with regard to edu-
cation; while higher education greatly
increases women’s likelihood of being
childfree, it does not for men. In 2006,
researchers at the National Center for
Health Statistics found that about half of
35-44-year-old women without kids were
childfree. That is, they were nulliparous
by choice. Participants in this study were
asked whether they expected to have
children; those who did not expect to
have children but were capable of having
them were defined as “voluntarily child-
less,” or childfree.
Contexts, Vol. 13, No. 4, pp. 68-70. ISSN 1536-5042, electronic ISSN 1537-6052. © 2014 American
Sociological Association. http://contexts.sagepub.com. DOI 10.1177/1536504214558221
Percent of women who have never given birth,
ages 40-44
20 percent
15
10
1976
Source: Pew Resource Center
The women and men I’ve interviewed
say not wanting to give up valued activities
is one reason they are childfree. Steve, an
engineer in his early 30s, shared, “I want
to be able to travel. I want to be able to
do things that I would not be able to do if I
had kids.” Janet said simply, “I don’t want
to give up my healthy sex life.”
Interview participants also describe
not having kids as an ethically responsible
choice. Kate, a student in her mid 30s,
said, “I’m really just concerned about our
Non-parents (including childless and childfree)
are more heavily concentrated in professional
and managerial occupations, more highly
educated, less religious, more likely to live in
urban areas, and hold less traditional beliefs
about gender roles than couples with kids.
world. At this time in our social struc-
ture right now it’s not going to be a good
thing to have children. We can’t bring
them up healthfully.” April, a social worker
in her late 30s, said not having children
“is responsible. Instead of this kind of
blindly following the societal expectation,
it means really taking a lot of factors into
1984 1992 2000 2008
consideration. I think about all kinds of
stuff. I camped over the weekend and I
saw the trash that people with kids left
and let build up from so much over use of
a camp site. I think about stuff like accept-
able population levels.”
childfree identity
As concern over declining birth rates
mounts, longstanding stereotypes and the
accompanying cultural hostilities toward
childfree people have emerged. Recog-
nizing their choice as stigmatized, some
childfree have mobilized around this iden-
tity. In 2013, childfree authors and activists
resurrected Non-Parents Day, a celebra-
tion originally founded by the National
Organization for Non-Parents in 1973.
This “annual recognition of amazing child-
free people and their lives” was renamed
FA L L 2 0 1 4 contexts 69
 trends
International Childfree Day and serves to
foster acceptance of the childfree choice.
Each year the International Childfree Man
and Woman of the Year are named for
their efforts to promote acceptance of the
childfree choice in society.
Via blogs and social networking
sites, the childfree find camaraderie
and challenge cultural stereotypes and
misperceptions. This online community
is growing; a 2009 University of Oxford
paper identified 18 Facebook groups
focused on the childfree; today over 80
such groups exist. The role of online com-
munities in childfree people’s lives has not
yet been systematically examined, but
For childfree women, the choice not to parent is
often linked to the desire to develop meaningful
careers. Men identifying as childfree cite the
high cost of rearing children and a desire for
financial flexibility as important to their decision.
research shows online communities help
other stigmatized groups unify, solidify
identities, and provide support.
Whether the childfree identity is
one around which people can effectively
mobilize remains a question. Several
studies note that the heterogeneity of
the childfree as a group may hamper
collective organization efforts. So far, that
hasn’t seemed to slow the proliferation of
childfree-focused blogs, meet-up groups,
or dating sites.
entering the public
consciousness
Some businesses have heard the col-
lective voice of the childfree, or at least
taken note of their economic power. In
the past year, airlines and restaurants
made headlines as they added kid-free
sections and hours. DeVries Global, a
70 contexts.org
market research firm, published a 2014
“Shades of Otherhood” study noting
that each woman who doesn’t have chil-
dren represents “enormous untapped
potential as a consumer and influencer.”
The media too has taken notice.
“The Childfree Life” graced the cover of
Time last summer, Slate and other news
sources weighed in, and childfree guests
made the talk show circuit on Katie last
fall. Conservative commentator Harry Sie-
gel in his 2013 Newsweek article laments
the rise of “postfamilial America” and
remarks that “the choice to be childless
is bad for America.” This fear has been
echoed by others such as Pope Francis
who commented that the childfree are
doomed to a fate of “old age in solitude,
with the bitterness of loneliness.”
Despite changes that have paved the
way for more than one possible answer
to the question of whether to parent,
cultural narratives have not yet caught
up to this reality. The dominant narrative
continues to be that, of the two options,
parenthood is the more mature, selfless
choice. Pop culture depictions of the
childfree perpetuate the myth that not
having kids is an unnatural choice made
by deviant people who may eventually
change their minds. Robin Scherbatsky
of How I Met Your Mother and Big Bang
Theory’s Bernadette Rostenkowski-
Wolowitz are two of the few prime-
time childfree female characters. Robin,
a gun-toting commitment-phobe, and
Bernadette, a scientist with a Ph.D. in
microbiology, challenge our dominant
cultural ideals of femininity. While this is
laudable, it also contributes to the myth
that the childfree choice is “unnatural.”
As one news piece put it last year, happily
childfree women are viewed as “danger-
ous oddities.”
In Robin and Bernadette’s cases,
both characters ultimately soften their
childfree stance, reinforcing the myth
that all childfree women eventually
change their minds. Upon learning she
can’t have children, Robin breaks down,
mourning the fertility she’d spent six sea-
sons evading. Bernadette decides she
would consider changing her mind if
her partner agreed to stay home with
the kids.
Despite negative popular narratives,
sociological research indicates that the
childfree may have more time and moti-
vation to contribute to their communities
through charitable and volunteer efforts.
Recent studies also suggest that they
help rear the next generation by serving
as mentors, teachers, counselors, and
friends to children, and that they lead
fulfilling and happy lives; form “cho-
sen families”; care about our collective
future; and enjoy the benefits of diverse
social networks as they age.
As these studies proliferate, they
may widen awareness and understanding
of the childfree choice and contribute to
more realistic predictions of the impli-
cations of people choosing to remain
childfree.
Amy Blackstone is in the sociology department at the
University of Maine. She blogs about childfree choice
at werenothavingababy.com.