Soft Skills: For The Project Management Team

SOFT SKILLS
FOR THE PROJECT MANAGEMENT TEAM
Dr. Saleh Mubarak

16 April 2020 Soft Skills - Dr. Saleh Mubarak 2
Importance of Soft Skills

• The study on school and college students, with high and
average GPA, and then looking at them again years later
in professional life…
• Researchers have shown that our success at work or in
life depends on Emotional Intelligence 80% and only 20%
of intellect
Source: EQ vs. IQ Which is Most Important in the Success or Failure of a Student? By:
Andrei Cotruş, CameliaStanciu, and Alina Andreea Bulborea. Procedia - Social and
Behavioral Sciences’ Volume 46, 2012, Pages 5211-5213
• Remember the saying:

• It is not what you say… it is how you say it!
• “Book smart” is not enough to do the job!
Couple More Things Before We Start!

• Every human being can change his / her habits and
characteristics
• It is more than what we originally thought!
• In life, there are factors we can’t control (genetic,
hereditary, environment, “luck”, etc.) but there are
certainly factors we can control.
• Positive people focus on what they can control rather than
complain over what they can’t.
• Each one of us may and should change habits and behavior to
better own life. There is no ceiling for improvement!
Types of Skills
• Project management, like any technical area, requires a
wide set of skills; both technical and non-technical (soft
skills)
• The objective of acquiring soft skills is:
• Better perform your job; including and most importantly: How to
interact with other people
• Improve the quality of your life (which in tern, helps you perform
your job even better)
• There is always a connection between one’s professional
and personal life
Soft Skills
• Types of soft skills:
• There are many but some are more relevant to your lifestyle and
type of work
• Beware of fads!
• Concerns with soft skills trainers:
1. People may choose certain training based on marketing
pressure rather than their own need.
2. A typical trainer focuses on the skill(s) he/she is doing; making
it the magic wand that will solve your problems, missing the
panoramic and integrative nature of these skills.
3. In many cases, the trainer has a financial incentive that may
impact neutrality and objectiveness of the content.
The Challenge…
1. What to choose among the many topics?
2. Which book, trainer, video you should choose?
3. How to integrate this new knowledge in your work and
life?
4. How do you put different types of training in a
panoramic synergizing perspective?
5. How to evaluate the acquired skill / knowledge, in short
and long-term basis?
6. How to update your skills?
Time Management
• Time management is the ability to use one's time
effectively and productively, especially at work.
• Time management is one of the most important skills
because if you can manage your time, you probably can
get things done
• In most cases, it is not a matter of lack of time; it is rather
a matter of organization and prioritization
• Time management and good organization skills help your
brain: retain more and perform better!
Essential Time Management Skills

1. Goal setting 10. Delegation / outsourcing
2. Prioritization 11. Coping skills
3. Self-awareness 12. Stress management
4. Self-motivation 13. Working effectively with
5. Focus others
6. Decision making 14. Record keeping
7. Planning 15. Organization and filing
8. Communication skills 16. Patience
9. Questioning and 17. Forgiveness
challenging
Source:
https://www.coachingpositiveperformance.
com
Urgent versus Important

Eisenhower Matrix
Urgent Not Urgent
1. Do first: 2. Schedule:
- Crises and problems - Important ongoing
- Hurt child projects
- Meeting with your - Hire new staff member
Important manager - Booking dentist
- Fix gas leak appointment
- Assignment due today - Exercise
-Relationships
3. Delegate if you can: 4. Do last or don’t do at all:
- Unimportant meetings - Reading Facebook feed
- Some phone calls - Watching TV
Not Important - Unnecessary -Time wasters
interruptions - Sorting junk mail
- Low-priority email
More Tips on Time Management

• Always create a “To do list”:
• Can be paper or electronic, but must be accessible at any time
• What if you remember something important while driving or in the
shower?
• Include necessary info along with the task
• For example: Call plumber Joe Smith for repair + phone number
• Make a comprehensive list and a “daily sub-list”
• You can underline, highlight, or use colors to indicate urgency or
importance
• Scratch tasks that are done… feel good about it!
• Update periodically

• Estimate time (start / finish) and resources
• Create deadlines
• Plan! For example: You can’t write items like (repair car, do my
annual physical exam) without checking the feasibility
• Avoid procrastination
• The myth of “I work under pressure”
• Delegate: for expertise or comfort
• The “good dictator” syndrome: I don’t trust anyone do it but myself!
• How much is your comfort worth to you?
• Use technology gadgets to document, schedule, set
alarms, etc., but have a back up!

• Avoid multi-tasking
• Start your day early
• Take breaks, reward yourself
• Learn when to say no
• Take time to plan… and time to reflect
• The Pareto Principle (80/20)
• Your brain is like your garage (or

computer hard drive): No matter
how big; it will soon be filled with
clutter.
• Once you organize it, not only

there will be more space
available, but it will be much
easier and faster for work and
finding needed info!
One Last Thought…

• Time management becomes a lot more efficient and
relevant when you deal with it within the context of
comprehensive “life management”:
• Good well-being for the body, mind, and soul
Stress: Good or Bad?

• How stress affects your brain - Madhumita Murgia (TED
Talk)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WuyPuH9ojCE
• There are a lot of things in life; materialistic and non-

materialistic that a certain controlled amount of it is
healthy and necessary, but too much is harmful and
possibly fatal
• Stress management is a key to a balanced, successful,
and happy life
Change Management
• Change management is the process, tools and
techniques to manage the people side of change to
achieve the required business outcome.
• Changing “people side” may require and trigger other changes:
Processes, equipment, materials.
• Change management incorporates the organizational
tools that can be utilized to help individuals make
successful personal transitions resulting in the adoption
and realization of change.
Change Level
• Change happens at the level of:
• Individual
• Organization
• Society
• Global
• Change can be
• for better or worse
• optional or forced
• One or multi-step
Change in the Organization

Project Management
Current Transition Future
Change Management
• Note that “Future” will no longer be future at a certain

point later in time!
Reasons for Change

• It is natural for organizations to experience change
throughout time:
• Leadership / personnel
• Mission / expectations
• Equipment / resources / technology
• Societal / environmental
• Natural / forced (significant event)
• In this world, “doing business as usual” may not be
enough. In fact, it may be a reason for failure!
The Decision to Change

• Need
• Facts
• Assumptions
• Short- and long-term targets
• Plan with expectations and requirements
• Problems and possible solutions
• Plan B / C
The Decision to Change

• The leadership must study the decision before
implementing
• Perhaps do a pilot study
• Measure all expectations and outcomes
• Cost of change versus cost of not doing the change / alternatives
• Reverting to the old way after announcing the change,
can be damaging to the credibility and resolve of the
leadership
Reaction to Change
• People always react differently when change is
demanded:
A. The catalyst / disciple: Leading, pulling others
B. The follower: Go on their own
C. The slacker: Need to be pulled
D. The stagnant / stubborn: Has no place here!
Barriers to Change
Famous one-liners:
• In my previous unit we did it like this.
• My last unit was awesome.
• I don’t want to train a new boss.
• The new leader thinks they know everything.
• This is how we do it.
• I was taught to do it like this.
• This organization stinks.
• We never had that problem before.
Barriers to Change (cont.)

Observed signs
• Members showing up late to meetings / expressing little or no
interest
• Members walking away / getting busy with own cell phones
• Members rolling their eyes during meetings / mumbling when
leadership is speaking to them
• Members talking to each other to gain support against new change
• Negative people are either:
• Passive: They just don’t like the change, or
• Rebel: Not only they just don’t like the change, they incite other to
refuse the change.
Strategies for Change

How leaders get the “buy in” from everyone?
• Prepare the vision, plan, and resources
• “A-B-C”:
• Awareness
• Be there to support the needs of ALL members
• Communicate
• Reinforce commitment to change
Strategies for Change (cont.)

• The leadership must have a “solid group” of members
who:
• Understand the new change well
• Believe in the change whole heartedly
• Are enthusiastic and willing to convince and help fellow members
• Serve are the catalysts for the change
• They are your line for defense / offence
Strategies for Change (cont.)

• The leadership must make clear that the change is “one
way” direction: No retreat!
• Those employees who refuse to accept and embrace the change
have no place in the organization
• Balance between firmness / decisiveness and
compassion
• Case study: PIMS at the Hillsborough County
Follow-up
• Conduct follow-ups to ensure success:
• Face to face
• Observations
• Surveys
Change at the Individual Level

• Steps for change
1. Feeling the need
2. Getting convinced of the need to change
3. Making a plan
4. Executing the plan
5. Measuring and comparing
6. Making adjustments
• Example:
• A smoker who needs to quit
• A person who needs to lose weight
• A person who always shows late for appointments / meetings
• A person with hot temper
• An unorganized person
Change at the Individual Level

• Requirements
• Know the facts and expectations
• Strong conviction and desire in the change
• Strong will / discipline
• Change of environment (to a more change-friendly one)
• Monitor and measure progress
• Get support as needed
I Want to Change…
• A vision without a plan is just a dream. A plan without a
vision is just drudgery. But a vision with a plan can change
the world”.
• Vision without action is merely a dream. Action without
vision just passes the time. Vision with action can change
the world.
Joel A. Barker
Effective Negotiation
• A successful negotiation requires the two parties to come
together and hammer out an agreement that is acceptable
to both.
Effective Negotiation
• Successful people are successful negotiators. It's as
simple as that.
• In business, you don’t get what you deserve. You get what
you negotiate!
Both quotes from Karras seminars on negotiation

https://www.karrass.com
Negotiation is needed for…

You need the right skills for the job, whether you are...
1. determining the price and terms at which you buy or sell.
2. closing with an important customer.
3. persuading others to work with and not against you.
4. setting or meeting budgets.
5. finalizing and administrating simple or complex contracts.
6. working on a problem with someone important to you.
7. managing and supervising those responsible for completing
the task.
8. breaking or avoiding a serious impasse.
(Karras seminars on negotiation)

Top Ten Effective Negotiation Skills

1. Problem Analysis
2. Preparation
3. Active Listening
4. Emotional Control
5. Verbal Communication
6. Collaboration and Teamwork
7. Problem Solving
8. Decision Making Ability
9. Interpersonal Skills
10. Ethics and Reliability
Source: https://smallbusiness.chron.com/top-ten-effective-negotiation-skills-
31534.html
Leadership and Teambuilding

• We have heard plenty about the difference between
managers and leaders
• Can we combine both in one person?
• Or do we need both types in an organization?
Leadership
• Leadership is the art of motivating a group of people to act
towards achieving a common goal.
• In a business setting, this can mean directing workers and colleagues
with a strategy to meet the company's needs.
• In business, leadership is linked to performance.
• While it's not solely about profit, those who are viewed as
effective leaders are those who increase their company's
bottom lines. Individuals in a leadership role must meet profit
expectations set by boards, or else they may be terminated
Source: Leadership Definition by Susan Ward

https://www.thebalancesmb.com/leadership-definition-2948275
Leaders versus Managers

Manager + Leader
• Management is a must, so we cannot replace it with
“leadership” alone
• A good manager carries also the traits of a leader who:
• Cares for his/her subordinates, listens to them, and makes them
feel valuable
• Follows the rules but makes sure these rules are fair and
applicable; both in the general and special cases.
• It is not only the law that matters, but also the spirit of the law
• While doing “business as usual”, a good manager always looks for
advancement and improvement of the status quo.
• A good manager is a visionary too; proactive and not reactive!
• Always questions “why?” and goes beyond the surface of things
• Dynamic and cannot be a “prisoner to the textbook”
Manager + Leader
• One of the most important traits of leaders is being
“rebellious”/ defiant:
• This implies not accepting things that are wrong or don’t make
sense, even when “following the rules”
• In any organization, the presence of a leader or few leaders is
healthy. They “rock the boat” when needed
• Too many leaders in the same organization may cause chaos and
have a negative impact!
• That’s why we need both: leaders and managers
• This rebellion / defiance must be in a construction and controlled
manner
Leaders: Born or Made?

• While there are people who seem to be naturally
endowed with more leadership abilities than
others, people can learn to become leaders by improving
particular skills.
• Situations when a person is “forced” to become a leader
• History is full of people who, while having no previous leadership
experience, have stepped to the fore in crisis situations and
persuaded others to follow their suggested course of action. They
possessed traits and qualities that helped them to step into roles of
leadership.
Leaders: Born or Made?

• “Like most things – leadership capability falls along a bell
curve. So the fact is that most folks who start out with a
modicum of innate leadership capability can actually
become very good, even great leaders.”
Erika Andersen, author of Leading So People Will Follow
Theory X and Theory Y:

Understanding People's Motivations*
• Theory X managers are authoritarian and tend to take a
pessimistic view of their people.
• This style of management assumes that workers:
• Dislike their work.
• Avoid responsibility and need constant direction.
• Have to be controlled, forced and threatened to deliver work.
• Need to be supervised at every step.
• Have no incentive to work or ambition, and therefore need to be
enticed by rewards to achieve goals.
* https://www.mindtools.com/pages/article/newLDR_74.htm

Understanding People's Motivations
• Theory Y managers are participative and have an
optimistic, positive opinion of their people, and they use a
decentralized, participative management style.
• This style of management assumes that workers are:
• Happy to work on their own initiative.
• More involved in decision making.
• Self-motivated to complete their tasks.
• Enjoy taking ownership of their work.
• Seek and accept responsibility, and need little direction.
• View work as fulfilling and challenging.
• Solve problems creatively and imaginatively.

Understanding People's Motivations
• And the reality is…
• We all are in-between theories X and Y, with certain tendency / bias
to either one…
• Some pull others,
• Some go on their own,
• Some have to be pulled,
• And some have to be kicked!
Theory Theory
Y X
Lessons in Leadership
“I know the fundamentals to teach tennis, but that

doesn’t mean I’m a good tennis player.”
Same goes for Leadership…

Team Building
• The Most Effective Team:
• Share information openly
• Participate in the team’s task
• Encourage each other
• No opinion is silly or ridiculous
• The team, not individual members, takes the responsibility and credit for
all ideas
• Use all of the team’s resources
• No lines are drawn along specialty work or ranks
This team…
Or this team?
The Team Building

• Different opinions, discussion, and criticism are
encouraged but once the team adopts an idea or
decision, the entire team moves on.
• No more “we should’ve done so”, “See? I told you!”, or “I’ll go
with you but still disagree”
• The leader must be fair and objective in explaining the adoption
of a decision after the discussion, even though may not be able
to convince every member
• Building the team must be a careful process because any
change in the composition of the team or its leadership
may return the team to the forming stage
The Team Building

• Leader: Delegate to team members as much as possible
• There should be always breaks for reflection and review
• And adjustments, whenever and wherever needed
Professional Democracy
• The concept of “Professional Democracy” is based on:
• A typical manager overseas a wide variety of professional
specialties. It is extremely unlikely that this manager is an expert in
all these areas
• Every specialty area should have (or be led by) an expert. The
dilemma is: this person knows more in his/her area of specialty
than the manager, but the manager has more authority and power
• The manager must listen to and respect the expertise and
knowledge of subordinates and encourage them to express their
opinion even if it contradicts own opinion. The subordinates also
must have the courage and confidence to express their opinion
without being intimidated.
• It is a culture that must be instilled in both the management and
employees
Emotional Intelligence
• It has been proven to a person’s success in life; both
personal and professional, depends on factors that are far
more than scientific achievement and IQ
• Although these success factors were identified and
named differently by scholars, there was a common
thread among them:
• Those successful people can communicate and interact with others
well
• Many scholars and researcher identified these factors
under different names such as social intelligence
• In 1995, Daniel Goleman, a science reporter for the New York
Times, published his book “Emotional Intelligence” which instantly
became very popular
• Like an avalanche or brush fire, this subject spread around the
world; both as a stand-alone topic and as a part of many other
topics
• Emotional intelligence is the ability to identify and manage
your own emotions and the emotions of others.
• It is generally said to include 3 skills:
1. Emotional awareness, including the ability to identify your own
emotions and those of others;
2. The ability to harness emotions and apply them to tasks like
thinking and problems solving;
3. The ability to manage emotions, including the ability to regulate
your own emotions, and the ability to cheer up or calm down
another person.
Source: https://www.psychologytoday.com
• We define EI as the ability to:
• Recognize, understand and manage our own emotions
• Recognize, understand and influence the emotions of others
• Thoughts → Feelings → Behavior
• Focus on outcomes: You don’t want to win the battle but
lose the war…
• IQ + EQ = Leadership
• Those who cannot read their feelings and control them,
are controlled by their feelings!
• My definition: It is the science that explains why smart
people act stupid sometimes
• Think of a situation in the past when you did not act wise, why?
• Your opponent / enemy may know your personality (weak
spots), so he/she controls / influences you by “pushing
your buttons”.
• Your actions must be independent of your opponent’s actions. They
must not be “reactions”!
Emotional Intelligence and Success

• Key to success: Discipline
• What is discipline? How can you achieve it?
• The objective is not to cancel or ignore emotions (and you
can’t do so) but to manage them and put brain/logic in
command.
• This can be really tough, but you can train yourself
What I See What I Do
Personal Competence Self-Awareness Self-Management
Relationship
Social Competence Social Awareness
Management
In order to improve, you must be willing to open up to a trusted confidant.

Emotional Intelligence 2.0, Bradberry & Greaves
• Self-Awareness: Your ability to accurately perceive your emotions
and stay aware of them as they happen. This includes keeping on
top of how you tend to respond to specific situations and certain
people.
• Self-Management: Your ability to use awareness of your emotions to
stay flexible and positively direct your behavior. This means
managing your emotional reactions to all situations and people.
• Social Awareness: Your ability to accurately pick-up on emotions in
other people and get what is really going on. This often means
understanding what other people are thinking and feeling, even if you
don’t feel the same way.
• Relationship Management: Your ability to use awareness of your
emotions and the emotions of others to manage interactions
successfully. Letting emotional awareness guide clear
communication and effective handling of conflict.
• Self-Awareness: Your ability to accurately perceive your emotions

and stay aware of them as they happen. This includes keeping on
top of how you tend to respond to specific situations and certain
people.
• Feedback from a trusted friend.
• Their perception of your emotions—it’s not what your sending but what’s
being received.
• Things you do too much / too little?
• What may be holding you back from managing emotions.

• Self-Management: Your ability to use awareness of your emotions to

stay flexible and positively direct your behavior. This means
managing your emotional reactions to all situations and people.
• How do your emotions lead to problems with others?
• Do you find yourself saying: “I was just joking or he/she can’t take a joke.”
• Do you experience uncontrolled outbursts?
• Do you experience uncontrolled mood swings?

• Social Awareness: Your ability to accurately pick-up on emotions in

other people and get what is really going on. This often means
understanding what other people are thinking and feeling, even if you
don’t feel the same way.
• Seek out feedback by asking about the feelings of others.
• Describe your perspective to see if it matches.
• Find out if they have “unspoken” messages.

• Relationship Management: Your ability to use awareness of your
emotions and the emotions of others to manage interactions
successfully. Letting emotional awareness guide clear
communication and effective handling of conflict.
• Be open and curious about others.
• Don’t avoid the inevitable. Address concerns while deliberately controlling

your emotions. Bring along a coach.
• Tackle a tough conversation while deliberately controlling emotions.

EI Exercise 1
• You are the manager of a team in your company. Joe is a
team member who is enthusiastic and talkative. In every
discussion, Joe likes to take time to express his opinion
even when he is not an expert in that area
• The problem is that Joe takes precious time from the team and
diverts the discussion in a less efficient way
• This behavior frustrates his teammates and makes them either
refrain from expressing legitimate opinions or respond to him in a
confrontational manner
EI Exercise 1
• You need to deal with the situation before the rift in the
team gets wider.
• What actions will you take?
• With every action, explain the expected outcomes and risks
• Prepare an alternative action if your primary action does not work
or backfires
EI Exercise 2
• How would you react in these situations?
A. You are driving your car and someone cut you off in a very
rude and dangerous way.
B. You are a cashier at a small store. Someone with a gun
approached you demanding all the cash in the cash register.
C. You are a professor, and caught a student cheating. She
admits cheating but says she “had to do so” because of harsh
conditions she has been going through. If she does not pass,
she will face dire circumstances. She begs you to “let her
pass”.
Conclusion…
• Any comments?
• Any questions?
• Keep in touch:
salehmubarak@hotmail.com
+1-813-455-9338

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SOFT SKILLS

FOR THE PROJECT MANAGEMENT TEAM

Dr. Saleh Mubarak

Importance of Soft Skills

• Remember the saying:

Couple More Things Before We Start!

Essential Time Management Skills

Urgent versus Important

More Tips on Time Management

More Tips on Time Management

More Tips on Time Management

• Your brain is like your garage (or

• Once you organize it, not only

One Last Thought…

Stress: Good or Bad?

• There are a lot of things in life; materialistic and non-

Change in the Organization

Current Transition Future

• Note that “Future” will no longer be future at a certain

Reasons for Change

The Decision to Change

The Decision to Change

Barriers to Change (cont.)

Strategies for Change

Strategies for Change (cont.)

Strategies for Change (cont.)

Change at the Individual Level

Change at the Individual Level

Both quotes from Karras seminars on negotiation

Negotiation is needed for…

(Karras seminars on negotiation)

Top Ten Effective Negotiation Skills

Leadership and Teambuilding

Source: Leadership Definition by Susan Ward

Leaders versus Managers

Leaders: Born or Made?

Leaders: Born or Made?

Theory X and Theory Y:

Theory X and Theory Y:

Theory X and Theory Y:

“I know the fundamentals to teach tennis, but that

Same goes for Leadership…

The Team Building

The Team Building

Emotional Intelligence and Success

Personal Competence Self-Awareness Self-Management

In order to improve, you must be willing to open up to a trusted confidant.

• Self-Awareness: Your ability to accurately perceive your emotions

• Feedback from a trusted friend.

• Things you do too much / too little?

• What may be holding you back from managing emotions.

• Self-Management: Your ability to use awareness of your emotions to

• How do your emotions lead to problems with others?

• Do you experience uncontrolled outbursts?

• Do you experience uncontrolled mood swings?

• Social Awareness: Your ability to accurately pick-up on emotions in

• Seek out feedback by asking about the feelings of others.

• Describe your perspective to see if it matches.

• Find out if they have “unspoken” messages.

• Be open and curious about others.

• Don’t avoid the inevitable. Address concerns while deliberately controlling

• Tackle a tough conversation while deliberately controlling emotions.