Grief & Loss
THERE IS NO SINGLE CORRECT WAY TO GRIEVE.
Developmental
Considerations
Early School-Aged Youth to Preteen
(6-12 Years)
What to look for:
Discomfort with expressing feelings
Irritability/Disruptive Behavior
Decline in academic performance
Somatic complaints
Lack skills to deal with intense
feelings
May want to put grief off to not
upset caregivers
What they might need:
Routine and Familiarity
Reassurance that adults can handle
things
Appropriate models 
Early Adolescent to Young Adult
(13-18 Years)
What to look for:
More comfort with expressing
emotions
Risky behaviors (for coping)
Depression/Withdrawal
Questioning identity
Threatened Autonomy
Guilt/Anger
What they might need:
Routine and Familiarity
Knowledge - Normalize their
experiences and help them
understand what to expect
Social Support - Let them know they
are not alone and others have had
similar experiences. Provide social
groups.
Listen to and acknowledge their
feelings
Stages of Grief
1. Denial
Avoidance, Confusion, Elation, Shock, Fear
2. Anger
Frustration, Irritation, Anxiety
3. Bargaining
Overwhelmed, Helplessness, Hostility, Flight
4. Depression
Struggling to find meaning
Reaching out to others
Telling one's story
5. Acceptance
Exploring Options, New Plans, Moving On
** These do NOT always occur in a linear way.
Working with Bereavement
Make sure you are emotionally-equipped and
mentally capable.
Pay attention to what they are telling you.
Normalize their experiences.
Asking them how their life has been different.
Coping Questions
Scaling Questions
Positive Blaming
Recognize how well they have been doing.
Develop a Future-Focus
Finding ways to remember those who pass
Adjust to changes and new environment that
no longer include the deceased
Bibliotherapy
Group Counseling
Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction
Techniques
Refer to outside services if necessary.
Information compiled by Emily Chen