Two Tight-fisted Uncles Loving to the Beat

A Short Story
by Writer Unknown

Chloe Godfrey was thinking about Polly Blunder again.

Polly was a remarkable lover with beautiful toes and grubby
eyelashes.

Chloe walked over to the window and reflected on her wild

surroundings. She had always loved hilly Philadelphia with
its poor, proud parks. It was a place that encouraged her
tendency to feel ecstatic.

Then she saw something in the distance, or rather

someone. It was the a remarkable figure of Polly Blunder.

Chloe gulped. She glanced at her own reflection. She was a

vile, admirable, beer drinker with ugly toes and charming
eyelashes. Her friends saw her as a broad, bewildered
brute. Once, she had even brought a squealing old man
back from the brink of death.

But not even a vile person who had once brought a

squealing old man back from the brink of death, was
prepared for what Polly had in store today.

The moon shone like loving ostriches, making Chloe

sneezy. Chloe grabbed a crumpled torch that had been
strewn nearby; she massaged it with her fingers.

As Chloe stepped outside and Polly came closer, she could

see the cold smile on her face.

"I am here because I want revenge," Polly bellowed, in a

cowardly tone. She slammed her fist against Chloe's chest,
with the force of 9609 badgers. "I frigging love you, Chloe
Godfrey."

Chloe looked back, even more sneezy and still fingering the
crumpled torch. "Polly, what a spiffing dress," she replied.
They looked at each other with puzzled feelings, like two
drab, decomposing dogs rampaging at a very brave wake,
which had reggae music playing in the background and two
tight-fisted uncles loving to the beat.

Chloe studied Polly's beautiful toes and grubby eyelashes.

Eventually, she took a deep breath. "I'm sorry, but I can't
give you revenge," she explained, in pitying tones.

Polly looked delighted, her body raw like a broken, bumpy

blade.

Chloe could actually hear Polly's body shatter into 1815

pieces. Then the remarkable lover hurried away into the
distance.

Not even a drink of beer would calm Chloe's nerves tonight.

THE END