Two Wild Uncles Swimming to the

Beat
A Short Storyby Anymouse
Forest Russell looked at the bendy knife in his
hands and felt lonely.

He walked over to the window and reflected on

his dirty surroundings. He had always loved
sunny Cardiff with its klutzy, kindly kettles. It
was a place that encouraged his tendency to
feel lonely.

Then he saw something in the distance, or

rather someone. It was the figure of Polly
Rockatansky. Polly was a spiteful doctor with
grubby eyelashes and greasy fingernails.

Forest gulped. He glanced at his own reflection.

He was a proud, wild, brandy drinker with
brunette eyelashes and pointy fingernails. His
friends saw him as a snotty, selfish Saint. Once,
he had even made a cup of tea for a zealous
toddler.

But not even a proud person who had once

made a cup of tea for a zealous toddler, was
prepared for what Polly had in store today.

The snow flurried like bouncing pigeons, making

Forest sparkly.

As Forest stepped outside and Polly came

closer, he could see the scrawny glint in her
eye.

Polly gazed with the affection of 6304 scheming

fair foxes. She said, in hushed tones, "I love you
and I want a kiss."

Forest looked back, even more sparkly and still

fingering the bendy knife. "Polly, what a spiffing
dress," he replied.

They looked at each other with relaxed feelings,

like two loud, large lizards hopping at a very
considerate carol service, which had drum and
bass music playing in the background and two
wild uncles swimming to the beat.

Forest studied Polly's grubby eyelashes and

greasy fingernails. Eventually, he took a deep
breath. "I'm sorry," began Forest in apologetic
tones, "but I don't feel the same way, and I
never will. I just don't love you Polly."

Polly looked angry, her emotions raw like a

proud, precious piano.
Forest could actually hear Polly's emotions
shatter into 2736 pieces. Then the spiteful
doctor hurried away into the distance.

Not even a glass of brandy would calm Forest's

nerves tonight.

THE END