Aspiring Missionaries' Dating Dos and Don'ts

It's gotten to the point where dating appears to be more of a game. This is a difficult game. What
was the end result? A happily ever after or a heartbreak, or sometimes you seem to come out on
top and are able to remain friends with the person who once held your heart. Who are the
players? You and anyone else who happens to be in your path. Sometimes it feels like you're
playing with your best friend, and other times it feels like you're playing with a random stranger.
I've reached a point where I'm perplexed by dating. Who should I go out with? How long do I
have to wait? How long should we first be friends? There should be a dating hand guide to help
me understand this! But, sadly, there isn't. And the game becomes even more perplexing when
you consider that we are aspiring missionaries. We have a million questions about ourselves. Is
this in accordance with God's will? How can I tell if I have a future with them? Are they also
called to missions? A lot of the time, we simply ask ourselves, "God, what's next?"

Dos and Don'ts in Dating

There are numerous things we can do to make our "dating game" a success.

Do prefer God's Will to your own:

We've all probably said the Lord's Prayer a million times. "Your will be done" is a part of that.
You have no idea what will happen next, and that's fine. I used to think I could write the best
story of my life. As a writer, I used to believe that my story would be far superior to the one that
God was crafting for me. The truth is that I don't even know where to begin to comprehend how
God is at work in my life.

Do Know Your Calling: We often feel God at work in our lives, leading us in one direction or
another. You must be aware of what your life is dedicated to. Things that your heart longs for.
Where your heart is. The truth is that you want to spend your life with someone who has a
similar story and path to you.

Seek Wisdom: Recognize that there are people out there who want the best for you. There are
those who want to see you succeed and grow. So, seek wisdom in two ways. First and foremost,
seek wisdom from those around you. God has placed people in your life so that you can
communicate with them and grow closer to God.

Know Your Limits/Boundaries

Before you enter into a relationship, I believe it is critical that you understand your boundaries
on multiple levels. First, there is the physical level. To put it bluntly, the devil tries to tempt us
through relationships. The devil is very good at convincing us that we can walk the line between
purity and impurity. But we can't, and it's difficult to see that when you're dating someone. So be
cautious, and be aware that temptation will arise. Prepare to fight not only for yourself, but also
on behalf of your significant other.

First and foremost, love God.

The first step in dating should always be a step of faith toward our Lord, Savior, and most
precious Treasure, King Jesus. He captures our hearts; he is the source of our deepest joy. We
bury our souls in Him and give up trying to save or prove ourselves. Our goal should be to
devote our minds to getting to know him better and better.

Don'ts in Dating

There are many things we can do to ensure that our relationship thrives or has a chance in the
big, scary world out there.

Don't Date Someone Who Isn't Willing To Live — "Missionary":

It takes a special person to want to give up everything in order to help those who have nothing.
One of my close friends once told me, "It takes a special heart to go out and serve the world."
You must be resilient in order to fight your battles and intercede for those around you. It takes a
special person to be willing to let go of everything and start over in order to love those around
them. It takes a special person to be a missionary because the work is difficult.

Don't Be Unequally Yoked: Another concept that comes to mind when we consider being
unequally yoked is the concept of spiritual maturity. It would be unwise for someone who has
walked with God for a long time to connect hearts with someone who is brand new to the faith.
In Hebrew 5, it is stated that the spiritually immature must begin with milk and then progress to
the meat that sustains them. It's the same in relationships. We need to find people who are
spiritually in the same place as us. When we are struggling, it is difficult to grow when we are
bouncing ideas off people who are much less mature than us.

Don't Lower Your Standards: Having things in common between the two of you has
significance. You must be careful not to let your heart be swept away by a person because you
see the Spirit in them. The presence of the spirit in anyone can be an extremely emotional
experience, and when our emotions become involved, it can be extremely difficult. But God gave
you emotions to be a gauge, not a guide. So, be aware of what you deserve, and don't let your
emotions control everything you do. You have standards, and they can be flexible at times, but
they should not be thrown away just to fit the person you want to date.

Self-Preparation

There are many things you can do to prepare for the future, but the most important thing is to
approach dating with a God-centered mindset. God must come first, or your foundation will
crumble beneath you.