SERAJ SIR@EDIFICATION ENGLISH

Contact number: 01841218695 E-mail: serajsir.edification@gmail.com

 SERAJ SIR@EDIFICATION ENGLISH

Formal Letter: A Letter of Complaint (Version: 2021)

STAGE 1: For Class 9 students only.

• Directed Writing has two parts of assessments:

a) Task fulfilment: 15 marks

b) Language: 15 marks (Total: 30 marks)

You target score: Minimum 27/30 (A*), minimum 24/30 (A)

• Task fulfilment includes: 4 things:

a) Purpose: what am I writing? (The purpose of a letter of complaint is to inform the authority
about the injustice, any wrong action or crime that was imposed upon you or happened to you
and you want a proper action or compensation or maybe you want the authority to mend their
ways.)

b) Audience: to whom am I writing? (It is basically a confidential letter which will be read by
the authority.)

c) Format: should be correct (If format is wrong then the purpose will not be fulfilled)

d) three (3) bullet points: 1st: Descriptive, 2nd: Descriptive, 3rd Reflective (Important)

• Language also includes 4 things:

a) register (word choice): The words you will use should be relevant. Tone should not be
angry but polite as you want a solution to your problem.

b) grammar: There should be no grammatical mistakes.

c) sentence construction: Complex sentences 60%, Simple: 30%, Compound: 10%

d) punctuation: Try to use semi-colon, colon, hyphen other than comma or full stop.

• Avoid writing unnecessarily long sentences.

• Use transition words/linking devices between paragraphs and sentences to build connection or
coherence.

• You may use the word ‘YOU’ or ‘I’ but do not overuse it.

• Try to use passive voice adequately. (To make your writing more formal)

• Use good vocabulary. (Should be relevant and appropriate for the audience.)

• Do not exceed the word limit. (Minimum 280 words, maximum 300 words)

Salutations:

• Always end with ‘Yours faithfully’ while writing to the authority

Contact number: 01841218695 E-mail: serajsir.edification@gmail.com

 SERAJ SIR@EDIFICATION ENGLISH

Task 1:
You and your family recently visited a restaurant for a celebration. Unfortunately, you received very
poor service which made the occasion unhappy and unsuccessful. You decide to write a letter to the
manager complaining about what happened.

Write a letter. You must include the following:

• the date and the reason for the celebration

• details of what went wrong
• what you would like your manager to do

Cover all three points above in detail. You should make sure your letter is polite but persuasive. Start
your letter with ‘Dear Sir’ and remember to add an appropriate ending.

Body of this letter: CIE provided Sample: Student A (Pakistan)

Dear Sir,
On 15th November 2014, I, along with my family members visited your restaurant for High-Tea. It
was my grandmother’s birthday so we all decided to take her out and celebrate the occasion in a
befitting manner. However, I regret to state that the service we received was very pathetic and
put a damper on the cheerful mood.

To begin with, we had called a day earlier and booked a table for ten for the 5:00 pm slot.
However, when we arrived there the receptionist denied having booked our table. After a lot of
pleading to check the list again she realised that the receptionist who had taken our reservation
was absent. We had to wait for half an hour while she sorted out the mix up. Finally, we were
shown to our table. As we sat down, we realised that the table had not been cleared as the dirty
crockery and cutlery were piled up on one end. It took several reminders to the waiter before they
were cleared and fresh plates and cutlery brought.

However, we decided to make the best of the situation and enjoy the food. Here we faced another
disappointment. Most of the food items had been consumed and had not been replenished. We had
to make repeated requests before this was done. The food that was brought was cold and
tasteless. By this time, we had had enough so we decided to settle the bill and leave.

I would really appreciate it if you could look into these issues and try to rectify them before you
lose customers. As manager of a restaurant of this repute you must see to it that the staff under
you is efficient and the food served in palatable and of good quality. You also need to look into the
service provided by your waiters.

I hope you will take effective measures to iron out these issues.

Yours sincerely
Amina Khan

Contact number: 01841218695 E-mail: serajsir.edification@gmail.com

 SERAJ SIR@EDIFICATION ENGLISH

CIE provided Sample: Student B (Singapore)

Dear Sir,
Last Saturday evening, 20 June 2004, I brought my parents to your restaurant to celebrate this
joyous occasion as Good Food restaurant was well known for its good food and impeccable service.
Unfortunately, we were not at all satisfied with the service rendered to us that day.

To begin with, we were given a table which had not been cleared. Used plates and cutlery, with
scraps of food spilt over, were left scattered about on the table. It was quite unsightly. Also, it
took a while for a waiter to come and clean the table and hand us the menu. We had to wait
another good ten minutes before a waitress attended to our orders. The waitress, whose name tag
identified her as Mary Loh, was rather inexperienced and impolite. When we queried her about two
or three dishes on the menu, she gave curt, monosyllabic replies. We were extremely annoyed
when she suddenly told us that she would come back later before she strode off to serve another
customer. Afterwards we had to signal to her to be served. Added to this, it took fifteen minutes
for the first dish to arrive, and this was after repeated reminders. To top it all, when I asked one of
the waiters about a vegetable dish which did not arrive at all, I was told that it had been sent to
another table by mistake and that we had to wait another ten minutes for it to be ready. We were
so disappointed and exasperated by the whole experience that we cancelled that dish. As our
mood was somewhat dampened by the bad service, we finished our food quickly since we could
not wait to get out of the place.

I am sure you will agree that the standard of service I described was dreadful. To be fair, the food
was good, but no matter how good the food tastes, customers are unlikely to return if the service
is bad. I look forward to better service next time.

Yours faithfully

Kenny Tan
Kenny Tan

Contact number: 01841218695 E-mail: serajsir.edification@gmail.com

 SERAJ SIR@EDIFICATION ENGLISH

POLICE COMPLAINT: MUST LEARN

Task 1:
You return to your house one day to find it has been broken into and many of your possessions have been stolen.
You decide to write a police complaint to report the robbery.

Write your letter. You must include the following:

• at what time and how long were you away from the house when the robbery took place.
• detailed information about the most valuable items taken.
• any clues you have noticed how you think the police might be able to catch the thieves.

Cover all three points above in detail. You should make your letter informative and helpful for the police. Start
your letter with “Dear Sir” and provide a suitable ending.

A RESPONSE FROM A CANDIDATE

Dear Sir, Salutation
I would like to lodge a complaint that my house No. 212, Road 13 was broken into and Body
make valuable items stolen. Opening: This sentence
will clearly state what the
purpose of the letter is.
1 line gap
Yesterday i.e. the 5th of December 2016, I was invited for a get together at my friend’s 2nd Paragraph:
house who lives in Kashimberg. I left the house at around 5 pm and was away for at Descriptive: Focus on
least four hours, returning at about 9:30 pm. When I entered my bedroom, I was the 1st Bullet point
alarmed to see that my belongings were scattered all around. The drawers had been (at what time and how
long were you away from
rummaged through and their contents were strewn all over the floor.
the house when the
1 line gap robbery took place)
For a moment I was stunned as this break in was a shock for me. However, gathering
my wits I decided to make an enquiry of what was missing from my room. The first thing
3rd Paragraph:
I checked was my safe. I heaved a sigh of relief to find that it had not been opened. Descriptive: Focus on
Then I began to note down the items missing. I was horrified when I saw that my Mac the 2nd Bullet point.
book Pro had been taken away. As I continued to take stock I found that my DSLR (detailed information about
the most valuable items
camera, my I-pad and play station had also been stolen. Apart from these major
taken)
valuables a few minor items had also been found missing.
1 line gap
As I looked around, I found that the thieves had also had a feast after they had finished 4th Paragraph:
their work. I had left a freshly baked cake on the kitchen table which had been eaten by Reflective: Focus on the
them. The roast chicken in the fridge had also been tucked into. This and the missing 3rd Bullet point.
items gave me an idea that the thieves were young people attracted by these gadgets. I
(any clues you have
also found a muffler lying on the floor-the kind worn by the college boys. I have noticed noticed how you think the
a group of college boys loitering around in the vicinity. I would suggest that you keep a police might be able to
vigilant watch on the neighbourhood, as this is the holiday season and people are away. catch the thieves)
I have a strong feeling that you will be able to apprehend these culprits.
5th Paragraph:
1 line gap Concluding sentence:
Hoping for a quick response.

Contact number: 01841218695 E-mail: serajsir.edification@gmail.com