1

00:00:01,919 --> 00:00:03,336

At least once a year,

2
00:00:03,420 --> 00:00:07,757
I like to bring in some of
my Kevin's Famous Chili.

3
00:00:07,841 --> 00:00:11,928
The trick is to
undercook the onions.

4
00:00:12,012 --> 00:00:15,848
Everybody is going to get to
know each other in the pot.

5
00:00:15,933 --> 00:00:18,559
Now, I'm serious
about this stuff.

6
00:00:18,644 --> 00:00:23,606
I'm up the night before, pressing
garlic and dicing whole tomatoes.

7
00:00:23,691 --> 00:00:26,776
I toast my own
Ancho chilies.

8
00:00:29,321 --> 00:00:33,074
It's a recipe passed down
from Malones for generations.

9
00:00:34,743 --> 00:00:37,286
It's probably
the thing I do best.

10
00:01:03,731 --> 00:01:06,315
Someone
is returning.

11
00:01:07,234 --> 00:01:09,861
He started his own company,
and now he's back.

12
00:01:09,945 --> 00:01:11,571
Who could it be?

13
00:01:12,156 --> 00:01:15,199
I'll give you a hint.
He is a man.

14
00:01:15,284 --> 00:01:18,202
A man you have missed
with all your heart.

15
00:01:18,287 --> 00:01:21,664
A man who has ruined
all other men for you.

16
00:01:21,749 --> 00:01:23,666
Who is it?

17
00:01:23,751 --> 00:01:25,918
Who is it?
Who is it?

18
00:01:33,343 --> 00:01:35,094
It's Michael Scott.

19
00:01:38,307 --> 00:01:39,766
Hold up!

20
00:01:39,850 --> 00:01:41,684
Conference room,
five minutes.

21
00:01:44,855 --> 00:01:47,440
Well, I guess the first
order of business

22
00:01:47,524 --> 00:01:50,193
is to welcome back
me and Pam and Ryan.

23
00:01:52,863 --> 00:01:57,825
And how about Casual Friday again, huh?
Reinstituting Casual Friday?

24
00:01:58,786 --> 00:01:59,952
You all look great.

25
00:02:00,037 --> 00:02:03,956
What I want to do right now is try
something a little different.
26
00:02:04,541 --> 00:02:06,375
I'm going to throw it out there,
starting with this meeting.

27
00:02:06,460 --> 00:02:10,254
I want you guys to run it. I want
you to say whatever you want.

28
00:02:10,339 --> 00:02:12,256
Take it away.
Your meeting.

29
00:02:14,510 --> 00:02:16,093
What are you doing?

30
00:02:16,386 --> 00:02:18,805
If there is something that you
would like to say as a group,

31
00:02:18,889 --> 00:02:22,099
then by all means, you may
say it to me right now.

32
00:02:22,226 --> 00:02:23,476
- Okay.
- Yes.

33
00:02:23,560 --> 00:02:25,144
People are dressed
inappropriately.

34
00:02:25,229 --> 00:02:27,980
Take it up with Toby.
What I want you to do

35
00:02:28,065 --> 00:02:30,149
is I want you
to look inward,

36
00:02:30,234 --> 00:02:33,945
and I want you to reflect, and I
want you to say something different.

37
00:02:34,029 --> 00:02:35,404
Can you give us a hint?
38
00:02:36,240 --> 00:02:38,991
When I needed salespeople
for my new paper company,

39
00:02:39,076 --> 00:02:41,744
everyone here turned
their back on me.

40
00:02:43,080 --> 00:02:46,165
Am I going to ask them to
beg for forgiveness? No.

41
00:02:46,250 --> 00:02:51,420
Am I going to ask for a
big, crying apology? No.

42
00:02:51,505 --> 00:02:55,091
Am I going to ask them to
slit their wrists for me? No.

43
00:02:55,175 --> 00:02:59,011
I just want a tiny,
microscopic version of that.

44
00:02:59,680 --> 00:03:01,013
Oscar, what were
you going to say?

45
00:03:01,098 --> 00:03:03,641
Nothing. I didn't
say anything.

46
00:03:03,725 --> 00:03:04,725
All right.

47
00:03:04,852 --> 00:03:07,228
Do I still have a job here?
Not important.

48
00:03:07,354 --> 00:03:08,855
Michael, she's...
Okay.

49
00:03:08,939 --> 00:03:10,690
All right,
yes, yes.
50
00:03:10,774 --> 00:03:13,150
She deserves to know.
You have a job.

51
00:03:13,235 --> 00:03:16,779
Frankly, you have a job
because Ryan and Pam

52
00:03:16,864 --> 00:03:19,115
are starting with us
as salesmen.

53
00:03:19,199 --> 00:03:21,325
Wait, what? How is
that going to work?

54
00:03:21,410 --> 00:03:22,869
It's going
to work very smoothly

55
00:03:22,953 --> 00:03:24,537
because Pam and Ryan
are bringing over

56
00:03:24,621 --> 00:03:27,498
a ton of clients from Michael
Scott Paper Company and...

57
00:03:27,583 --> 00:03:29,208
You mean the clients
you stole from us.

58
00:03:29,293 --> 00:03:30,835
Yeah, aren't we getting
those clients back?

59
00:03:30,919 --> 00:03:32,712
No, you lost
those clients.

60
00:03:32,796 --> 00:03:34,714
I call foul, sir.
Okay.

61
00:03:34,798 --> 00:03:35,923
You were bought out.
They...
62
00:03:36,008 --> 00:03:39,218
So the company, then, bought
out all of the stolen clients.

63
00:03:39,303 --> 00:03:41,762
Okay, Dwight, let me
explain something to you.

64
00:03:41,847 --> 00:03:45,933
I set the rules, and you
follow them blindly, okay?

65
00:03:46,018 --> 00:03:48,519
And if you have
a problem with that,

66
00:03:49,146 --> 00:03:52,023
then you can talk to
our complaint department.

67
00:03:52,482 --> 00:03:53,983
It's a trashcan.

68
00:03:59,990 --> 00:04:01,824
Don't fall in
love with me, kid.

69
00:04:07,956 --> 00:04:10,249
Boscov's
at the Steamtown Mall?

70
00:04:10,334 --> 00:04:12,043
It sure looked good
on the mannequin.

71
00:04:12,169 --> 00:04:14,295
Well, you have good taste.
Well, thanks.

72
00:04:14,379 --> 00:04:17,590
I sure wish I had more time to
talk to my clients, though.

73
00:04:17,674 --> 00:04:18,674
What?
74
00:04:18,759 --> 00:04:21,719
Isn't that what you said to a bunch of
my clients when you were stealing them?

75
00:04:21,803 --> 00:04:23,471
That I didn't have
enough time for them?

76
00:04:23,555 --> 00:04:25,097
Oh, I, uh...

77
00:04:25,182 --> 00:04:27,808
Close your mouth, sweetie.
You look like a trout.

78
00:04:30,187 --> 00:04:31,896
The man is
wearing sandals.

79
00:04:31,980 --> 00:04:34,982
I don't need to see Oscar's
toes at work. Gross.

80
00:04:35,067 --> 00:04:37,443
I mean, he looks like
he just got off the boat.

81
00:04:37,527 --> 00:04:39,820
Can't you just not
look at his feet?

82
00:04:39,905 --> 00:04:41,238
Excuse me?

83
00:04:41,698 --> 00:04:44,408
Oh! You're so educated,
aren't you, Toby?

84
00:04:44,493 --> 00:04:46,202
So trained to deal
with a hysterical woman!

85
00:04:46,286 --> 00:04:48,204
I don't want to
look at his feet!

86
00:04:48,288 --> 00:04:49,914
Do your job!

87
00:04:49,998 --> 00:04:53,125
Well, I was in the seminary
for a year and dropped out

88
00:04:53,210 --> 00:04:56,045
'cause I wanted to have sex
with this girl Kathy.

89
00:04:56,129 --> 00:04:58,214
Followed her
back to Scranton,

90
00:04:58,298 --> 00:05:00,383
took the first job
I could find in HR.

91
00:05:01,677 --> 00:05:03,511
Later, she divorced me.

92
00:05:04,721 --> 00:05:08,683
So, no, I wouldn't say
I have a passion for HR.

93
00:05:10,727 --> 00:05:13,145
There you are, my friend.
Oh. Thanks, man.

94
00:05:14,940 --> 00:05:16,190
Pamela.

95
00:05:16,984 --> 00:05:18,484
Thanks, Michael.
Yep.

96
00:05:22,948 --> 00:05:25,199
Fresh, hot ink.

97
00:05:26,243 --> 00:05:27,827
New file system?

98
00:05:28,453 --> 00:05:32,498
Trust me, Stanley, you're going to
want to read this memo very carefully.
99
00:05:32,582 --> 00:05:35,459
I am not changing
the way I do my files.

100
00:05:35,544 --> 00:05:38,087
No, no! This goes
for all of you.

101
00:05:38,171 --> 00:05:44,343
Believe me, you are going
to want to heat my words.

102
00:05:44,428 --> 00:05:47,096
When held over heat, the
invisible ink will reveal

103
00:05:47,180 --> 00:05:50,182
that everyone should meet
at the warehouse immediately.

104
00:05:51,268 --> 00:05:53,769
Do not ask me where
I got the invisible ink.

105
00:05:56,023 --> 00:05:57,815
Urine. It was urine.

106
00:06:02,195 --> 00:06:03,863
I'm sorry you're
offended by my shoes,

107
00:06:03,947 --> 00:06:06,282
but I'm not going to
drive home to change.

108
00:06:06,366 --> 00:06:08,701
Okay. I could loan you
a pair of socks. No.

109
00:06:08,785 --> 00:06:10,036
No, they're clean.
I was gonna wear them

110
00:06:10,120 --> 00:06:11,495
to volleyball practice.
I don't think so.
111
00:06:14,875 --> 00:06:15,875
Andrew Bernard.

112
00:06:15,959 --> 00:06:18,085
Okay, what are you
still doing at your desk?

113
00:06:18,170 --> 00:06:20,629
What are you still
doing not at your desk?

114
00:06:20,714 --> 00:06:23,132
Did you even
read the memo?

115
00:06:23,216 --> 00:06:25,342
All my files are now in
reverse alphabetical order...

116
00:06:25,427 --> 00:06:29,638
No, you idiot! There is a
code embedded in the memo.

117
00:06:29,723 --> 00:06:32,975
Listen, you need to round up all the
salesmen, except for Ryan and Pam,

118
00:06:33,060 --> 00:06:35,686
and get them down to
the warehouse, pronto.

119
00:06:35,771 --> 00:06:39,190
Oh, it is on, like a
prawn who yawns at dawn.

120
00:06:39,274 --> 00:06:41,067
Stop doing
rhyming poetry.

121
00:06:41,151 --> 00:06:43,360
Just tell them, please.
God, the simplest thing.

122
00:06:46,031 --> 00:06:47,323
We're in crisis
mode here.
123
00:06:47,407 --> 00:06:49,867
Do you understand
that two unqualified

124
00:06:49,951 --> 00:06:52,453
so-called salespeople
are being favored

125
00:06:52,537 --> 00:06:54,997
because they all
failed together?

126
00:06:55,082 --> 00:06:56,916
And frankly, I'm not convinced
that Michael and Pam

127
00:06:57,000 --> 00:06:58,626
didn't have a thing going
while they were gone.

128
00:06:58,710 --> 00:06:59,710
Can I address that?

129
00:06:59,795 --> 00:07:00,878
No, you're too close.
Okay.

130
00:07:00,962 --> 00:07:03,130
Stanley, how do you feel about
those two taking your clients?

131
00:07:03,215 --> 00:07:05,341
It's not right.
I don't like it.

132
00:07:05,425 --> 00:07:06,759
He doesn't like it.

133
00:07:06,843 --> 00:07:09,428
You don't take my clients away
and give them to a secretary.

134
00:07:09,596 --> 00:07:12,431
No offense, Jim.
I think she's very pretty.

135
00:07:12,516 --> 00:07:14,266
Her face is okay,
but...

136
00:07:14,351 --> 00:07:17,103
Jeez, what... What
are you doing here?

137
00:07:17,187 --> 00:07:19,688
I don't know. I saw a crowd. Thought
there might be a dog fight or...

138
00:07:19,773 --> 00:07:21,023
Get out!

139
00:07:21,858 --> 00:07:23,442
We need to
do something.

140
00:07:23,527 --> 00:07:26,612
I'm thinking maybe a coup,
or we take Ryan hostage.

141
00:07:26,696 --> 00:07:27,738
Those sound too harsh.

142
00:07:27,823 --> 00:07:29,115
No, I'm not saying
we do those things.

143
00:07:29,199 --> 00:07:31,200
I'm saying something
like those things.

144
00:07:31,284 --> 00:07:32,993
Of course.
What is like a hostage?

145
00:07:33,078 --> 00:07:34,328
Excellent question.

146
00:07:34,412 --> 00:07:36,497
We could write a
strongly worded letter.

147
00:07:36,581 --> 00:07:37,998
Words will never
be enough.

148
00:07:38,083 --> 00:07:40,334
Strongly painted picture. No,
pictures are too interpretive.

149
00:07:40,418 --> 00:07:42,837
Can I just say something?
I know that tempers are high.

150
00:07:42,921 --> 00:07:44,004
But I think the best
way to handle this

151
00:07:44,089 --> 00:07:45,714
might be to just talk
to Michael directly.

152
00:07:46,299 --> 00:07:47,550
Oh.

153
00:07:47,634 --> 00:07:50,886
That... That's a
great idea, Jim.

154
00:07:50,971 --> 00:07:52,346
I totally see
your point.

155
00:07:52,430 --> 00:07:55,808
Okay, we'll talk to Michael directly,
so, uh, meeting is over, I guess.

156
00:07:55,892 --> 00:07:57,476
I'll see everyone upstairs.
Great. See you upstairs.

157
00:07:57,561 --> 00:07:58,602
Come on.

158
00:08:00,856 --> 00:08:04,733
Listen, now is the time for action.
I'm talking...

159
00:08:07,279 --> 00:08:09,155
That one's great.
I know.
160
00:08:09,239 --> 00:08:10,489
- Why are you so mad?
- You look so classy.

161
00:08:10,574 --> 00:08:11,740
I do? Well...

162
00:08:14,578 --> 00:08:17,538
Hi, you have a second? Michael
Scott Paper Company only.

163
00:08:17,622 --> 00:08:19,248
Yeah, I think you're gonna
wanna cool it with that,

164
00:08:19,332 --> 00:08:21,083
'cause it's starting to
upset the other salesmen.

165
00:08:21,168 --> 00:08:22,293
Okay, well...
Tough.

166
00:08:22,377 --> 00:08:24,211
I will... No. No.

167
00:08:24,296 --> 00:08:26,172
I'll talk to them when they all
get back from the bathroom.

168
00:08:26,256 --> 00:08:28,841
This is awkward to talk about,
but there may or may not be,

169
00:08:28,925 --> 00:08:32,011
but definitely is, a mutiny forming
in the warehouse right now.

170
00:08:32,888 --> 00:08:34,555
Against who?
You.

171
00:08:35,223 --> 00:08:36,473
Us.
What?
172
00:08:36,558 --> 00:08:38,475
It's gotta be because they
all want their clients...

173
00:08:38,560 --> 00:08:40,853
The old Michael Scott
might have taken this,

174
00:08:40,937 --> 00:08:42,980
but not the new
Michael Scott.

175
00:08:43,064 --> 00:08:47,902
They are in for a bitter surprise.
I am not to be truffled with.

176
00:08:48,778 --> 00:08:52,114
Six weeks ago, none of these
people wanted to come with me.

177
00:08:52,199 --> 00:08:55,451
You two were the only ones
with the stones to follow.

178
00:08:55,535 --> 00:08:56,577
Mmm-hmm.

179
00:08:56,620 --> 00:08:59,413
That was us, right there.
We were something else.

180
00:08:59,497 --> 00:09:02,791
What you gotta do is you gotta
go down to that warehouse

181
00:09:02,918 --> 00:09:05,502
and you gotta crack some skulls,
Chiklis style. Mmm-hmm.

182
00:09:05,587 --> 00:09:07,338
Yeah, The Commish.

183
00:09:07,464 --> 00:09:10,132
Yes, but Chiklis Shield style...
Okay.

184
00:09:10,217 --> 00:09:12,509
...not Commish style.
Yeah, yeah. The Shield.

185
00:09:15,764 --> 00:09:18,641
It's crazy, what's going
on out there today, huh?

186
00:09:18,808 --> 00:09:21,685
I know. Yeah,
it's kinda...

187
00:09:21,770 --> 00:09:23,979
Sometimes it's best
just to stay out of it.

188
00:09:24,648 --> 00:09:26,690
That's true.
That's right, yeah.

189
00:09:27,734 --> 00:09:28,984
Want to play a game?

190
00:09:35,367 --> 00:09:36,951
Hey, gang,
where you been?

191
00:09:38,453 --> 00:09:39,453
Lunch.

192
00:09:39,537 --> 00:09:41,705
Where'd you eat?
A restaurant.

193
00:09:41,790 --> 00:09:43,165
What did you
have, Stanley?

194
00:09:43,250 --> 00:09:46,043
I had a salmon salad
with water, no ice.

195
00:09:46,127 --> 00:09:48,545
I was going to get a soda, but the
waitress talked me out of it.

196
00:09:48,630 --> 00:09:50,089
Her name was Flo.
She had black hair.

197
00:09:50,173 --> 00:09:51,215
I had Mexican food.

198
00:09:51,299 --> 00:09:52,466
So since you
guys already ate,

199
00:09:52,550 --> 00:09:56,303
you won't be eating the stuff that you
brought with you for lunch, will you?

200
00:10:03,103 --> 00:10:06,981
Wow, Stanley,
is that egg salad?

201
00:10:07,065 --> 00:10:08,649
Andy brought
some salmon.

202
00:10:08,733 --> 00:10:09,858
That looks great.

203
00:10:09,943 --> 00:10:12,653
Dwight, is that
a meat sandwich?

204
00:10:12,737 --> 00:10:14,613
You guys hungry?
I can eat.

205
00:10:14,698 --> 00:10:17,324
I'm going to have some
of this meat sandwich.

206
00:10:18,368 --> 00:10:19,410
It's pony.

207
00:10:19,703 --> 00:10:22,079
Mmm! What kind of sauce
is on your salmon?

208
00:10:22,247 --> 00:10:24,790
Dijonnaise.
209
00:10:24,958 --> 00:10:26,709
Thanks for going out, guys.
Mmm-hmm.

210
00:10:27,335 --> 00:10:30,212
Hey, Meredith, can I talk to
you privately for a second?

211
00:10:30,297 --> 00:10:32,589
About what?
Your outfit.

212
00:10:32,674 --> 00:10:34,717
What? What's wrong
with my outfit?

213
00:10:35,719 --> 00:10:38,554
You might consider
pulling it down a touch.

214
00:10:39,139 --> 00:10:41,390
It's riding up
a little high.

215
00:10:41,474 --> 00:10:44,101
Bunch of prudes. You know,
Oscar's allowed to wear sandals,

216
00:10:44,227 --> 00:10:45,978
but I'm not allowed to
wear open-toed shoes?

217
00:10:46,062 --> 00:10:47,479
Is that how it goes?

218
00:10:47,564 --> 00:10:48,939
Meredith, your boob is out.

219
00:10:49,065 --> 00:10:50,065
Fine.

220
00:10:51,943 --> 00:10:53,777
Damn it, Meredith, where
are your panties?

221
00:10:53,862 --> 00:10:55,446
It's casual day.

222
00:10:57,032 --> 00:10:58,240
Happy?

223
00:11:04,080 --> 00:11:05,289
- Toby.
- Toby.

224
00:11:05,415 --> 00:11:06,498
Toby?

225
00:11:08,084 --> 00:11:09,877
No. If you do that,
I'm going to do that.

226
00:11:09,961 --> 00:11:11,587
If you do that,
I'm going to do that.

227
00:11:11,671 --> 00:11:13,589
If you do this,
I'm going to do that.

228
00:11:14,841 --> 00:11:16,467
What if I just do this?

229
00:11:16,551 --> 00:11:18,218
You don't want
to do that.

230
00:11:19,262 --> 00:11:22,139
I'm just hiding out until
all this stuff blows over,

231
00:11:22,223 --> 00:11:25,684
with Creed, playing
chess, at work.

232
00:11:26,269 --> 00:11:27,770
He's winning.

233
00:11:30,523 --> 00:11:32,399
I feel like I'm
describing a dream I had.

234
00:11:32,609 --> 00:11:34,777
I'm sorry you feel
that way, Mr. Bart.

235
00:11:34,861 --> 00:11:38,113
Is there anything I can do
to make things better?

236
00:11:38,198 --> 00:11:40,574
Give me the phone.
Give me the phone.

237
00:11:40,700 --> 00:11:43,202
Exactly, if this is your first complaint
in 10 years... That's my client.

238
00:11:43,328 --> 00:11:45,245
...things have been generally good.
Give me the phone.

239
00:11:45,330 --> 00:11:46,455
Tell him Dwight Schrute
wants to talk to him.

240
00:11:46,539 --> 00:11:48,165
- Look, Mr. Bart...
- Hi, Mr. Bart!

241
00:11:48,291 --> 00:11:50,250
...at these prices, with this service...
Hey, it's Dwight here!

242
00:11:50,335 --> 00:11:51,752
...you're not going to
find this anywhere else.

243
00:11:51,836 --> 00:11:53,128
Dwight Schrute here. Hey,
don't hang up, Mr. Bart.

244
00:11:53,254 --> 00:11:55,506
No, sir, don't listen... Listen, I
know times are tough right now,

245
00:11:55,632 --> 00:11:56,799
and I laud your thriftiness.
Look, let me...
246
00:11:56,841 --> 00:11:58,425
Ryan, hand
the phone over!

247
00:11:58,468 --> 00:11:59,968
Stop flustering me,
everybody!

248
00:12:00,011 --> 00:12:01,970
Who let this boy
on the phone?

249
00:12:02,097 --> 00:12:03,180
Mr. Bart!

250
00:12:05,433 --> 00:12:06,809
I cannot believe
you lost that account!

251
00:12:06,893 --> 00:12:08,894
He was my client
for 10 years!

252
00:12:08,978 --> 00:12:12,231
You made him lose the account by
screaming at him the entire time!

253
00:12:12,315 --> 00:12:13,399
It's okay, Ryan.

254
00:12:13,483 --> 00:12:16,068
You're a secretary!
What do you know?

255
00:12:16,152 --> 00:12:18,112
And you're a temp!
And I'm taking your phone.

256
00:12:18,196 --> 00:12:20,072
I'm confiscating this!
Hey, guys...

257
00:12:20,156 --> 00:12:23,117
You know what I want you to do?
Shake hands, get over it.

258
00:12:26,955 --> 00:12:28,747
That was not
a shake, Dwight.

259
00:12:28,832 --> 00:12:31,125
We want our clients back
or we quit, Michael.

260
00:12:31,209 --> 00:12:32,584
Who quits?

261
00:12:33,503 --> 00:12:34,545
Me.

262
00:12:34,671 --> 00:12:36,755
And me.
Me, too.

263
00:12:36,840 --> 00:12:37,840
You guys gotta be kidding.

264
00:12:37,924 --> 00:12:39,425
No, we gotta be
deadly serious.

265
00:12:39,509 --> 00:12:41,135
We'll start our
own paper company.

266
00:12:41,219 --> 00:12:46,181
The Schrute-Bernard-Lapin-
Vance-Stanley Paper Company.

267
00:12:46,266 --> 00:12:49,768
I love it! I love this idea,
and I fully support you.

268
00:12:49,853 --> 00:12:53,313
As a matter of fact, I'm going
to give you some seed money.

269
00:12:53,398 --> 00:12:55,732
There you go. There's
some seed money for you.

270
00:12:55,817 --> 00:12:57,651
And you can take it,
no hard feelings,

271
00:12:57,735 --> 00:13:00,237
but if you stay,
I want an apology,

272
00:13:00,321 --> 00:13:01,321
and I want a big one.

273
00:13:01,448 --> 00:13:03,824
You want us to apologize to you?
Yes, I do.

274
00:13:03,908 --> 00:13:05,451
That's completely backwards.

275
00:13:05,535 --> 00:13:06,660
It's frontwards!

276
00:13:06,744 --> 00:13:08,745
Michael, you thought you
were attacking Corporate,

277
00:13:08,830 --> 00:13:10,205
but we were the
ones who got hurt.

278
00:13:10,290 --> 00:13:11,623
You should be
apologizing to us.

279
00:13:11,708 --> 00:13:12,791
That's right.

280
00:13:12,876 --> 00:13:17,838
Michael, you always said we were a family.
Then you went after us.

281
00:13:21,551 --> 00:13:24,052
No matter how I look at
this, I am in the wrong.

282
00:13:25,263 --> 00:13:28,974
And I have looked at this thing
like 100 different ways,

283
00:13:29,058 --> 00:13:32,394
from my point of view,
from their point of view,

284
00:13:34,731 --> 00:13:39,359
98 others, and bottom
line, I am in the wrong.

285
00:13:39,444 --> 00:13:40,736
I'm the bad guy.

286
00:13:42,655 --> 00:13:44,781
I need you
to arrange a meeting

287
00:13:44,866 --> 00:13:46,575
between me and
the sales staff

288
00:13:46,659 --> 00:13:48,869
without Ryan
and Pam knowing.

289
00:13:48,953 --> 00:13:50,287
Gasp.

290
00:13:50,371 --> 00:13:52,498
Are you talking
about a secret meeting?

291
00:13:52,582 --> 00:13:54,666
Whatever you guys
did earlier.

292
00:13:54,751 --> 00:13:57,336
I don't know the first thing
about secret meetings.

293
00:13:57,420 --> 00:14:00,339
Just do it, okay? Get them there.
Get them there.

294
00:14:00,423 --> 00:14:01,673
I'll do the best
I can, Michael.

295
00:14:01,758 --> 00:14:02,799
Are you kidding me?

296
00:14:02,926 --> 00:14:05,594
Deceit does not come easy to me.
Okay, okay, okay.

297
00:14:15,605 --> 00:14:17,356
I really love
your outfit.

298
00:14:17,440 --> 00:14:19,024
Thank you so much
for saying that.

299
00:14:19,108 --> 00:14:21,401
I can't believe that Toby
thinks this is inappropriate.

300
00:14:21,486 --> 00:14:22,861
You look like J-Lo.

301
00:14:23,279 --> 00:14:25,447
So, from the bottom
of my heart

302
00:14:25,532 --> 00:14:28,200
to the top of
my heart, I am sorry.

303
00:14:28,284 --> 00:14:29,868
Are you giving us
our clients back?

304
00:14:29,953 --> 00:14:32,329
If we could just focus
and go down the line,

305
00:14:32,413 --> 00:14:35,040
and everyone would say,
"Apology accepted,"

306
00:14:35,124 --> 00:14:36,625
I think we would
all feel better,

307
00:14:36,709 --> 00:14:40,504
and then we can break
out my gift to you,

308
00:14:40,588 --> 00:14:42,714
complimentary
white chocolate bark.

309
00:14:42,799 --> 00:14:44,716
Nobody likes that stuff,
except for you.

310
00:14:44,801 --> 00:14:46,802
They wouldn't make it
unless people liked it.

311
00:14:46,886 --> 00:14:49,304
Michael, just give us our clients back.
That's all we care about.

312
00:14:49,389 --> 00:14:51,223
Okay, if I give you
your clients back,

313
00:14:51,307 --> 00:14:53,392
there won't be enough
clients for Pam and Ryan,

314
00:14:53,476 --> 00:14:55,644
and I promised both of them that
they were going to be salespeople.

315
00:14:55,728 --> 00:14:57,896
So?
Fine, have your clients.

316
00:14:58,022 --> 00:15:00,566
I can see that's what you
wanted all along. Okay.

317
00:15:00,650 --> 00:15:02,359
However,
I rescind my apology.

318
00:15:02,443 --> 00:15:03,527
- That's fair.
- Absolutely.

319
00:15:03,611 --> 00:15:06,113
You are not reacting
at all as I had hoped.

320
00:15:13,371 --> 00:15:15,998
What did I tell you about
building forts in my warehouse?

321
00:15:18,126 --> 00:15:21,420
Michael gave all of our clients
back to their old salespeople.

322
00:15:21,504 --> 00:15:23,755
So now there's not enough for
both me and Pam to stay on.

323
00:15:23,840 --> 00:15:26,049
He can only keep one of
us as a salesperson now.

324
00:15:26,134 --> 00:15:27,801
He'll make his decision
by the end of the day.

325
00:15:27,885 --> 00:15:29,344
I think you
should get it.

326
00:15:30,179 --> 00:15:31,680
You really
grew into it.

327
00:15:31,931 --> 00:15:33,098
Oh.

328
00:15:33,683 --> 00:15:35,100
I think you
should get it.

329
00:15:35,184 --> 00:15:37,603
You've changed a lot,
and you'd be good at it.

330
00:15:38,771 --> 00:15:41,148
If you really think that, will
you tell that to Michael?

331
00:15:41,232 --> 00:15:43,734
That would go a long
way, coming from you.

332
00:15:43,818 --> 00:15:44,943
Yeah.

333
00:15:45,028 --> 00:15:46,236
Thanks.

334
00:15:47,155 --> 00:15:50,324
So, hey, I want to set
you up with my daughter.

335
00:15:50,992 --> 00:15:52,951
Oh, I'm engaged to Pam.

336
00:15:53,036 --> 00:15:54,036
I thought you were gay.

337
00:15:54,120 --> 00:15:56,496
Then why would you want to set
me up with your daughter?

338
00:15:56,581 --> 00:15:57,998
I don't know.

339
00:15:58,082 --> 00:15:59,625
Jim, could I talk
to you for a minute?

340
00:15:59,709 --> 00:16:01,752
Sure, let me just
finish this turn.

341
00:16:02,253 --> 00:16:06,465
And Bingo was
his name-o.

342
00:16:07,675 --> 00:16:09,426
Let's go.
Challenge.

343
00:16:10,887 --> 00:16:11,970
I need your help.

344
00:16:12,055 --> 00:16:14,514
This whole Pam-Ryan debate
is screwing with my head.

345
00:16:14,599 --> 00:16:17,351
Well, I don't want to be biased, but I
am very close to Ryan. You know that.

346
00:16:17,435 --> 00:16:18,727
You're close
with Pam, too.

347
00:16:18,811 --> 00:16:21,229
Oh. She's nice, I guess.
You know what?

348
00:16:21,314 --> 00:16:22,731
Best thing to do,
pros and cons list.

349
00:16:22,815 --> 00:16:26,568
Pro for Ryan, he went to business school.
He's my number-one choice.

350
00:16:26,653 --> 00:16:28,195
Well, that's...
I like his hair.

351
00:16:28,279 --> 00:16:31,448
Cons, Ryan, he
defrauded the company.

352
00:16:31,574 --> 00:16:33,158
He has never made a sale. Okay.

353
00:16:33,242 --> 00:16:34,326
He definitely
stole my iPod.

354
00:16:34,410 --> 00:16:35,827
That sounds pretty biased.

355
00:16:35,912 --> 00:16:37,162
You didn't
hear my pros.

356
00:16:37,246 --> 00:16:39,790
Environmentally conscious, 'cause his
mom drives him to work every day.

357
00:16:39,916 --> 00:16:42,668
Okay. Pam, pros, I like her.
Mmm-hmm.

358
00:16:42,752 --> 00:16:45,921
I think that she
is a fast learner.

359
00:16:46,005 --> 00:16:47,714
Cons, she doesn't
always follow through.

360
00:16:47,799 --> 00:16:50,092
New York and the whole
art school thing.

361
00:16:50,176 --> 00:16:51,176
And Roy.

362
00:16:51,260 --> 00:16:52,803
She has a weird voice.
That's not true.

363
00:16:52,887 --> 00:16:53,970
I don't need to
tell you that.

364
00:16:54,055 --> 00:16:56,556
I think she'd be a
really good salesperson.

365
00:16:56,641 --> 00:16:59,351
I don't think you're being
totally impartial, though,

366
00:16:59,435 --> 00:17:01,395
because you haven't said
one bad thing about Pam.

367
00:17:01,479 --> 00:17:03,021
And I won't.
Okay.

368
00:17:03,481 --> 00:17:05,232
So be it. Then you've
lost credibility,

369
00:17:05,316 --> 00:17:07,901
and I'm going to go with
my gut, and that's Ryan.

370
00:17:07,985 --> 00:17:09,111
Okay.

371
00:17:09,779 --> 00:17:11,947
You're right. Sometimes,
when she is tired,

372
00:17:12,031 --> 00:17:13,407
she can be
a little bit shrill,

373
00:17:13,491 --> 00:17:15,575
but that's not a weird
voice, that's just...

374
00:17:17,412 --> 00:17:18,495
Take it easy.

375
00:17:18,579 --> 00:17:21,415
Oh. Man! Wow!

376
00:17:21,499 --> 00:17:22,708
"Honey!

377
00:17:23,584 --> 00:17:27,212
"I want you to
put the garbage out!

378
00:17:27,296 --> 00:17:29,047
"'Cause I'm not gonna
have sex with you

379
00:17:29,132 --> 00:17:30,966
"unless you bring
out the garbage!"

380
00:17:35,054 --> 00:17:37,556
I have a very difficult
decision to make.

381
00:17:39,225 --> 00:17:41,601
It's like last week
I was at the video store.

382
00:17:42,395 --> 00:17:44,896
Do I rent Devil
Wears Prada again

383
00:17:44,981 --> 00:17:48,024
or do I finally get around
to seeing Sophie's Choice?

384
00:17:48,818 --> 00:17:52,362
It is what you would call a
classic difficult decision.

385
00:17:53,990 --> 00:17:56,908
You don't understand
clothing, Toby!

386
00:17:56,993 --> 00:17:59,619
You're dressed like this
amorphous blob of khaki.

387
00:17:59,746 --> 00:18:00,954
All right, look, what
you've got to understand is

388
00:18:01,038 --> 00:18:02,456
when you come to work,

389
00:18:04,000 --> 00:18:07,085
Listen up, Flenderson, you're
being weak and ineffectual.

390
00:18:07,170 --> 00:18:09,087
I'm cowboying
this meeting, okay?

391
00:18:09,172 --> 00:18:11,923
Here are the new rules,
okay? Earth tones only.

392
00:18:12,008 --> 00:18:14,259
Also, women are forbidden
to wear pants.

393
00:18:14,343 --> 00:18:16,303
All right, come on,
sit down, Dwight. No.

394
00:18:16,429 --> 00:18:17,929
I'm running this meeting.
That's debatable.

395
00:18:18,014 --> 00:18:19,055
It's not.
Listen...

396
00:18:19,140 --> 00:18:20,932
It's not. Sit down,
or I'm writing you up.

397
00:18:21,017 --> 00:18:22,768
Hmm. Where's
this guy been?

398
00:18:22,852 --> 00:18:24,227
Casual Fridays
are canceled.

399
00:18:24,312 --> 00:18:25,812
What? Let's just
not do it anymore.

400
00:18:25,897 --> 00:18:27,564
That's not a solution.
No, it is a solution.

401
00:18:27,690 --> 00:18:28,940
You're running
from the problem.

402
00:18:29,025 --> 00:18:30,817
There's not a single
appropriate outfit

403
00:18:30,902 --> 00:18:33,069
in this whole... Except
mine, quite honestly.

404
00:18:33,321 --> 00:18:35,864
Pam, could you
come in here, please?
405
00:18:39,702 --> 00:18:41,119
Have a seat.

406
00:18:41,204 --> 00:18:42,329
Okay.

407
00:18:45,875 --> 00:18:47,709
Well, there's no
easy way of saying this,

408
00:18:47,794 --> 00:18:52,672
so I think I will
just drag it out.

409
00:18:53,800 --> 00:18:57,302
Since the dawn of time, there have been...
Just tell me.

410
00:18:57,386 --> 00:18:59,012
I gave Ryan
the sales job.

411
00:19:01,307 --> 00:19:03,642
There just weren't enough
clients for the two of you.

412
00:19:03,726 --> 00:19:05,268
So I had to...

413
00:19:05,394 --> 00:19:07,354
I'm sorry. Sorry. No, okay,
okay, I get it, yeah.

414
00:19:11,901 --> 00:19:13,151
Why are you giggling?

415
00:19:15,154 --> 00:19:17,322
Is this a joke?

416
00:19:17,406 --> 00:19:18,615
Michael, is this...

417
00:19:19,575 --> 00:19:20,867
Did I get the job?

418
00:19:20,993 --> 00:19:22,285
Yes.

419
00:19:22,370 --> 00:19:23,662
I did?
Yep.

420
00:19:23,746 --> 00:19:26,414
For real? You're not
kidding? I did?

421
00:19:26,499 --> 00:19:28,458
No, you're the best person for the job.
You're going to be great.

422
00:19:28,584 --> 00:19:30,585
Oh, Michael, thank you!
Okay.

423
00:19:30,670 --> 00:19:33,255
Thank you. Thank you.
You will not be sorry.

424
00:19:33,339 --> 00:19:38,343
You should have seen your face.
Oh. Man! That was classic.

425
00:19:39,595 --> 00:19:41,805
I really thought
I didn't get it.

426
00:19:41,889 --> 00:19:42,973
Oh. Really?

427
00:19:43,057 --> 00:19:44,057
Yeah.
Man.

428
00:19:44,141 --> 00:19:45,559
That was really good.
'Cause you said I didn't.

429
00:19:45,643 --> 00:19:47,060
That was really good.

430
00:19:47,144 --> 00:19:48,478
What about Ryan?
431
00:19:48,563 --> 00:19:50,856
I don't know. I offered
him his temp job back.

432
00:19:50,940 --> 00:19:52,065
We'll see.

433
00:19:52,149 --> 00:19:55,735
He was not happy at all
when I offered him this job,

434
00:19:55,820 --> 00:19:57,988
and then I told him that he
didn't get the job, so...

435
00:19:58,072 --> 00:20:00,824
Yeah, maybe you shouldn't
fake-fire people anymore.

436
00:20:00,908 --> 00:20:03,451
I don't appreciate you
telling me what to do,

437
00:20:03,536 --> 00:20:06,079
so clean out your desk.
You are through.

438
00:20:07,790 --> 00:20:09,541
Thanks, Michael.
Oh.

439
00:20:09,625 --> 00:20:11,251
What's our
receptionist's name?

440
00:20:11,335 --> 00:20:12,377
Erin.

441
00:20:12,461 --> 00:20:13,628
Could you send her in?

442
00:20:17,258 --> 00:20:19,384
Erin, Michael
wants to see you.

443
00:20:23,890 --> 00:20:25,390
Hello.
Hi.

444
00:20:25,474 --> 00:20:26,600
Have a seat.

445
00:20:28,644 --> 00:20:30,520
This is very
difficult to say.

446
00:20:30,605 --> 00:20:33,356
But no one here likes
you in the office,

447
00:20:33,441 --> 00:20:35,775
and we're going to
have to let you go.

448
00:20:39,322 --> 00:20:42,282
Hank, would you come up here, please?
Hank is our security guard.

449
00:20:42,408 --> 00:20:44,618
Oh. I can go... He will
be ushering you out.

450
00:20:46,370 --> 00:20:47,412
Oh.

451
00:20:48,789 --> 00:20:50,081
Oh, your face.

452
00:20:50,166 --> 00:20:51,333
Oh!

453
00:20:51,375 --> 00:20:55,253
Is... Do the people... No, I'm kidding.
You're not fired. Yet.

454
00:20:57,632 --> 00:20:58,632
Do they not
like me, though?

455
00:20:58,758 --> 00:21:00,342
I don't know, actually. Okay.