Master Class

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If you are happy with your current spiritual path

and have no desire to explore your Infinite
Spiritual Potential or make your dreams of Love,
Bliss and Spiritual Enlightenment come true, you
are strongly advised to TURN BACK NOW!

Still here?
Yay!! You passed the first test!
“The force is strong with this one!”
Okay, let’s get started!

But first, a word from our lawyers:
This document constitutes a solicitation to purchase the Spiritual Success! Enlightenment Master-Class Course
(hereinafter referred to as the Work) and is not the work itself. No warranty express or implied is made that the reading
this promotional document will elevate the reader into Full and Abiding Spiritual Enlightenment. Neither Ned McFeely
(hereinafter known as Guru Ned, Master Ned, Master McFeely, Sri Sri Ned and Guru Sri Sri Master Ned McFeely and all
variations thereof) shall be held responsible in whole or in part for the failure of the reader to achieve Spiritual
Enlightenment from this promotional document. .
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didn’t read all this legal crap, didja?
Okey-doke! NOW let’s get started!

Hi! I'm Sunny, and I'm going to hang
out with you as we make this journey
of Spiritual Awakening together!
Ready... set...

O YOU DREAM of achieving Spiritual
Enlightenment some day? Who doesn’t! But
try asking yourself a few tough questions:
Have you ever wondered if. . .
. . .you are merely dreaming YOUR OWN LIFE?
. . .you’ve never had a SINGLE WAKING MOMENT?
. . .you are asleep RIGHT NOW?

Sound crazy? Sure it does! But countless studies by
Major Universities and Independent Labs have shown that
MOST PEOPLE go through their ENTIRE LIVES in a state of
DEEP TRANCE, from which they never emerge!
The sad truth is that the vast majority of us, including the
people you interact with every single day, are completely
asleep, and don’t even know it!
And even worse, YOU TOO may be one of these unfortunate

people who goes through their entire life without ever
experiencing a single moment of Full Waking Consciousness!
Don’t you think it’s time for a change?

But first, I need something from you!
No, it's not money or adulation or trust or even your
firstborn child (LOL!!!). I just need you to answer one
question as honestly as you can. Ready? Here it is:
How much would you pay for

Total Spiritual Illumination?
A hundred dollars? A thousand dollars? A MILLION dollars?
Wait! Don't tell me yet! This is just something for you to

think about for now. How much are your house and your
car and your bank accounts really worth if you're not
really awake to enjoy them? NOT MUCH, right?

Did you know that...
• MOST people go through life never realizing
their True Spiritual Potential?
• YOU could be living in Profound Spiritual Bondage

right now, and not even KNOW IT?!
• Spiritual Enlightenment is not the private domain

of the few but the Inalienable Birthright of ALL?
• The failure to achieve Spiritual Enlightenment is a

leading cause of Conflict, Misery, Disease,
Confusion and even DEATH in the world today?
• GOD HIMSELF wants you to enjoy the Joy and Bliss

of the Fully Awakened Life?
If you didn’t know that,

then friend, this is...

YOUR LUCKY DAY!!!
Now, for the first time in human history, you can achieve
the highest levels of Peak Spiritual Excellence and
deepest levels of Profound Spiritual Depth...
All from the Comfort and

Privacy of Your Own Home!
(And for a lot less $$$ than you might think!)
Sound good?
Heck Yeah!
“Tell me more! Tell me more!”
Now that you're getting the hang of it... let's try
a few more questions!
Have you ever suspected that you were

BORN for MORE?
Have ever wished that you could be up to

73% HAPPIER?
Have you ever wondered if it might not be

NOW or NEVER?
Then read on, because...
I have some
Very Exciting News
just for you!

Howdy Folks!
My name is Sri Sri Master Guru Ned McFeely, but let's dispense
with all those tiresome formalities...
You can call me Master Ned!
And at the risk of sounding immodest, yes, it's TRUE! I am a...
Fully-Realized, Totally Enlightened,

Card-Carrying Spiritual Master!
That’s right! I am totally, completely, absolutely SPIRITUALLY

ENLIGHTENED, and let me tell you, folks, people like me do
not grow on trees! It took years of hard work and dedication
to get where I am today. But because I put in all that hard
work, I can show you how to make the same journey in a
fraction of the time and with a whole lot less effort!

Sound good? You bet!
And let me tell you from my own personal experience, being
enlightened is...
Super EASY and Super FUN!!
“But wait, Master Ned!” you say. “I thought it was, like,

really hard to become Spiritually Enlightened?”
No way, Jose! If books, magazines

and the internet have taught us
anything, it's that anyone can
convince themselves they’re
enlightened. Maybe those guys do
grow on trees, but that doesn’t
mean they want to share the wealth
with you!
THE WORLD COMMUNITY of spiritual teachers, authors and

gurus is like an elite club. They want everyone to think
awakening is really hard so they can keep it all to themselves!
Well, I'm here to CRASH their little party!
Why should those folks have all the fun? Why shouldn't you
get a seat at the table and a slice of the pie and a piece of
the action? All you really need is a friend on the inside...
And I want to be that friend!

Maybe you know me as the super-successful author of
Enlightenment for Spiritual Dummies, which will be a
mega-bestseller as soon as I finish writing it!

And before you ask... Heck No!
You do NOT have to go to India or Tibet or Japan. You do
NOT have to grovel at the feet of a so-called master or twist
yourself up like a pretzel and subject yourself to mind-
numbing boredom just to become enlightened! Gosh, if
Spiritual Enlightenment isn’t fun, what’s the point!
Over my many years as an Enlightened Spiritual Master,

many people have come up to me and said:
"Hey, Guru Ned, you're a Fully-Realized, Totally

Enlightened, Card-Carrying Spiritual Master, why
do you bother trying to enlighten the rest of
humanity when you could just go off and live a
life of Radiant Bliss and Transcendent Joy, and
not get dragged down into the seedy underbelly
of a spiritually benighted humanity?"
Wow! Such a great question deserves a great answer!

And here it is...
Friends, that's just not

the McFeely way!

hether it was participating in Bake Sales to
end the war in VIETNAM, or selling Raffle
Tickets to fight APARTHEID, or writing
Heartfelt Letters beseeching Mr. Gorbachev
to TEAR DOWN THAT WALL, my driving force
in life has always been to End Suffering and
Spread Light into the darkest corners of the
Human Condition.
But hey, don't take my word for it! Let's see what some of
my many friends and admirers have to say:
"Baba McFeely provides a Ray of Hope lighting the

path to a brighter future for a spiritually oppressed
humanity!" -Sarah T, Youngstown, OH
"This is the right man at the right time. If anyone can

deliver mankind to a New Age of Super Radiance and
Eternal Bliss, it's Guru Ned!" -Mark D., Taos, NM
“Master McFeely’s course gets right to the heart of

the matter. I can feel myself getting more
enlightened every day!” -Shelly S., Kowloon
"Shri Shri Ned received his calling at an early age and

has answered with his new Spiritual MasterClass
designed to bring the human race out of the shadows
and into the light, and all at a very attractive price!"
-GK, Anchorage, AK
Wow guys, thanks! You can't make up praise like that!

Oh sure, I could just go off and live my wonderful
life and leave the rest of humanity huddled in
state of Spiritual Endarkenment...
...but that's not how the Nedster rolls!
I hear your silent WAILS! I feel your ancient PAIN! I detect a

Great Disturbance in the Force that tells me all is not right
with my fellow man!
And yes, by gosh, I don't care if it sounds

corny, but I consider it my Moral Obligation
and Spiritual Duty to leave the world a better
place than I found it. In fact, I have taken the
Sacred Bodhisattva Vow to never rest until ALL
SUFFERING HAS ENDED and ALL SENTIENT
BEINGS have achieved TOTAL SPIRITUAL
LIBERATION!
You heard me right…
Total Spiritual Liberation

for All Sentient Beings!
Yep, that’s a pretty tall order and I may not succeed, but gosh
darnit, I’m giving it my best shot. I’m sorry to get so worked
up, but waking a slumbering humanity is a big job and I take it
pretty darn seriously!

o you ever get tired of being a member of the
Great Unwashed? Do you ever wish that your Soul
could be Clean and White like an angel's wing
instead of Crusty and Gray like an old sweatsock?
Do you ever wish you could live forever in a state of
Heavenly Radiance and Perfect Bliss 24/7/365?
Sure you do! It's only natural. But did you also know that
these goals are within easy reach? That's what I'm here to
share with you today. (And you thought this was just a
cheesy sales pitch, HA!)
See what other people just like you are saying about the
wonderful world of Spiritual Enlightenment:
“Enlightened and lovin’ it! Thanks Master Ned!”

-Candy P. Boca Raton, FL
“If I knew it was this easy, I would’ve gotten

enlightened years ago!” -Larry W., Istanbul
“No amount of money would be too much for this

experience. Guru McFeely is the greatest!”
-Barry T., Smithfield, TN
“Don’t put your dreams on hold. Do yourself a favor

and get this course today!” -Bridget W., Bangkok
Thanks guys, you’re the best!

IGHT NOW, you might be feeling like you're not a
candidate for Merging with Universal Mind. Maybe you
think you're too old, too unworthy, or just too lazy to
master the subtle complexities of Divine Union with
the All-Knowing, All-Seeing Godhead, and maybe you
are. But wait!
It's Not Your Fault!

All your life you have been a victim. You have been held back
by a family and society that has failed to nourish and cultivate
your ISP (Infinite Spiritual Potential), and has kept you
trapped in the BoI (Bondage of Ignorance) even as you harbor
a secret desire to spread your wings and soar to hitherto
unimagined heights!
Well, now is your chance to prove the naysayers

wrong! Now is your chance to take action, to make
a positive step in the direction of your own spiritual
evolution!
But hey, c'mon, let's be honest. I've been where you

are. I know what you're saying right now. You're saying...
"But Guru Ned, are Total Enlightenment,

Oceanic Bliss and Unity Consciousness
really right for me?"
I know you have a hectic lifestyle. I know you have a job and a
mortgage payment and kids and bills and, as the Immortal
Bard would say, the thousand natural shocks that flesh is heir
to, but, as the Bard would also say…

Spiritual Enlightenment is a
consummation devoutly to be wished!
In my twelve-part home-study Spiritual Success!
Enlightenment MasterClass, you'll learn the Four Steps of
the Royal Path: Open, Awaken, Perceive and Communicate!
Open your 3rd Eye, and 4th and 5th and

even 6th! Why limit yourself to 3?
Awaken the rumbling Kundalini Serpent

coiled in your lower bowels.
Perceive your Aura. Buff out age spots

and unsightly blemishes.
Communicate with Ascended Beings who

are eager to hear from you!
And much, much more!
Wouldn’t you agree that giving all your earthly possessions

now and in perpetuity in exchange for The Peace that
Surpasseth All Understanding is a pretty good deal?
Heck yeah, right?

But wait! Just because you have attained complete and
abiding Spiritual Enlightenment doesn’t mean you don’t need
your car or your flatscreen TV or your golf clubs anymore! Am
I the kind of bum who would strip you down to your last
nickel? Heck no, Little Joe! That may be how those other guys
do it, but not your friend Master Ned!

So now, without further ado...
This special knowledge of Total Enlightenment and Perfect
Bliss is only a phone call away! (Act now, and you will also
receive a free 30 minute phone consultation with a Master
Ned-certified Enlightenment Facilitator, part of our Gold-
Standard Spiritual Buddy System! A $600 value!)
Wait! That's not all!
Order right now and you will also receive my Top Secret
Special Report: "Wake the Flock Up While Fleecing the
Sheeple" an $1,850 value: FREE! (Just kidding! OMG, I really
had you going there!)
But hey, let's get real!
I'm not just selling some schlocky twelve-part self-study

course, I'm inviting you to…
Partake in the GLORIOUS BANQUET which life has

laid out for you, while you settle for crumbs and
squander your birthright!
Become one of the SPIRITUAL ELITE so you can

participate in the Noble Work of rescuing a
Spiritually Benighted Humanity!
Escape SOCIETAL PROGRAMMING and MENTAL

ENSLAVEMENT and claim your birthright of ESM:FC
(Enlightened Spiritual Master: First Class!)

In this course, you will learn the secrets of...
1. Power Meditation®: Research shows that seven

minutes of PM® twice a week achieves 19% greater
results than twelve hours of regular meditation!
2. Boon-Granting: (beta) You'll be a real hit at parties

once you master a few simple techniques.
3. Mystic Insight: (patent pending) Become your own

Spiritual Hogwash Detector! (Requires the Bonus
13th Level, free if you order by midnight tonight!)
4. Spiritual Retasking: Reshape your destiny with the

power of your Divine Will. (Be careful what you
wish for!)
5. Subliminal Suggestion: (18+) Build your own

Spiritual Empire. Win friends and influence people
the easy way!
6. Perfect Pitch: This one just kinda happens. Can’t

explain it, but it’s pretty cool!

Oh, and before you tune out because enlightenment
sounds too hard, let me assure you that Master Ned’s
Enlightenment MasterClass demands absolutely...
NO vows of Silence, Solitude or Celibacy,

or even avoiding sugary desserts.
NO getting whacked with a stick because

you don't know the sound of a barkless dog!
NO abstaining from sex, drugs and whatever

else you kids are getting up to these days!
You won’t even have to take a vow of poverty because

the price of the course will break your bank! (Ha ha!
Just kidding! It’s very reasonable!)
Like Scientific-Looking Tables?

Well, this course is loaded with them!

Isn’t it time You were the Star of Your Own Show?
Still not sure Spiritual Enlightenment is right for you? Not sure
how it will fit in with your busy family life and work schedule?
And what about the neighbors? What will Fred and Ethel
downstairs think when they see you enjoying a full and abiding
spiritual awakening while they're slipping ever-deeper into
depression, debt, alcoholism, and ultimately, DEATH?
Great question! Glad you asked!
Why be a Fred when you can be a

Ricky? Why be an Ethel when you
can be a Lucy? Why shouldn’t it be
your name in lights? Why shouldn’t
you be the star of your own show
or headlining your own act at the
Tropicana?
Why be a Fred and Ethel

when you can be a Ricky and Lucy?
Why shouldn't you be the one in the spotlight? Why shouldn't

you be the one soaking up all the glory and adoration and
worship that comes with being a Fully Enlightened Spiritual
Master?
Let’s make that happen today!

Pssst!! Let me tell you a
little secret...
Here’s a little-known fact that those other guys
won’t tell you: Most SEEKERS, no matter
how devout, well-intentioned and sincere,
will never become FINDERS.
Yes, that’s very sad, but I am proud to say that we

boast one of the highest Seeker-to-Finder Conversion Rates in
the industry! So now you can get off that merry-go-round and
start making real progress, not in years or lifetimes, but by
this time tomorrow!
And here’s the REALLY BIG SECRET

those other spiritual solution-providers
don’t want you to know:
THEY don’t actually want you to become enlightened because

then THEY lose a customer and gain a competitor! THEY are
afraid that if they actually deliver the goods to you, you’ll go
out and deliver those goods better and cheaper to other
people... and put THEM out of business!
But not good ol’ Master Ned, I can tell you that!
I welcome the competition! I hope you’ll take my teachings

and techniques and share them with the world. I hope you’ll
tell two friends and they’ll tell two friends and before you
know it, we’ve enlightened the world.*
* Resale rights sold separately.

But here’s the biggest secret of all…
You’re already enlightened,

you just don’t know it!
Wow! How crazy is that? Pretty crazy, right? But it’s TRUE! All
this time you’ve been looking all over the place for
something, when it was like your own butt. . .
It’s been Right Behind You the Whole Time!!!

(But hey! Don’t feel stupid that you couldn’t find it.
Feel happy that you found Guru Ned!)
You see, you can never become enlightened because you were
never unenlightened in the first place! All you have to do to
wake up is stop pretending you’re not awake! The reason you
can’t find enlightenment is because you’re looking for it! Stop
looking and voila! There it is!
But how do you actually wake up and reclaim your naturally

enlightened state?
➢ By meditating for months and years and decades

because you believe it all adds up?
➢ By devoting yourself to some Guru who doesn’t

even remember your birthday?
➢ By foregoing the finer things in life and living in

self-imposed poverty?
Heck no! Why go through such frustration when all you have
to do is pick up the phone, pull out your credit card, and place
your order today? My course tells you all you need to know!

Don’t Delay! Act Now and you will also receive...
3 Free Months of Divine Guidance (long-
distance rates may apply)
Certificate of Spiritus Emeritus from the Ned

McFeely Satoriversity of the Lesser Antilles.
(Includes embossed gold foil medallion with
scalloped edge, suitable for framing!)
One Year of Free Access to Guru Ned's Super-

Secret Members-Only Chat Forum (for Power
Elites only!)
Free 8 ounce jar of Master McFeely’s Spiritual

Moonshine (pure and unadulterated!)
PLUS! Act Now and receive these FREE Special Reports...
1. Top Ten Beginner’s Mantra Pack: Really get your

spiritual adventure off the ground! (Intermediate
and Advanced Mantra packs sold separately)
2. Chanting to Nirvana: Why just chant when you can

Turbo-Chant? It’s like using a spiritual megaphone!
3. Salvation for Fun & Profit: What's the difference between

saving humanity and a bucket of bliss? The bucket!
But wait! There's even MORE!

If you’re going to be a Guru,
you’ll have to start acting like a Guru
with these Special Reports!
Special Report #1: How to Host a Super-Successful
Satsang! Shocking Shakti Secrets. Make your crowd feel
the burn! Tips & Tricks for soaking seekers in the power
of your presence!
Special Report #2: Baffle them with B*llsh!t! Make

up your own spiritual words, ancient mysteries, sacred
rites and mystery schools. You'll be amazed at what
they'll believe! (You might even believe it yourself!)
Special Report #3: The Placebo Effect is Real!

Is it better to be awake or dream you’re awake?
Find out why believing is better than being, and
a whole lot easier!
Special Report #4: BotR Ka-Ching! Take your

profits to the next level with Back-of-the-Room
sales. Get ‘em while they’re hot! They'll be dyin'
to be buyin'! And don’t forget, blessing the merch
means another 63% to your bottom line!!
BONUS Report: Master Ned’s Kickass Blackjack

System Beat The House Like A Rented Mule! This
Special Report alone could pay for your
enlightenment in less than 17 minutes at the
blackjack table!
Sold separately, these special reports would

cost you over $3,577, but you get them FREE!

Still not sure Enlightenment is right for you?
“Hey Master Ned,” I hear you saying, “slow your roll! All this
sounds great, but I’m still not sure Spiritual Enlightenment is
really right for me!”
I hear what you're saying, grasshopper. You're a smart cookie

with Infinite Spiritual Potential and Amazing Powers of
Discrimination and you're not just going to jump on every
spiritual bandwagon that rolls through town. You want to see
some actual proof! Am I right?
How about a 60-Day Best-Price Guarantee!

How's that for putting your money where my
mouth is? If you find spiritual enlightenment
anywhere for a better price within 60 days, I’ll
refund the difference!
And that's not all! If for any reason you do decide that the
Profound Peace, Heavenly Bliss and Oceanic Awareness of
UNITY CONSCIOUSNESS and ONENESS WITH GOD are not right
for you, we’ll provide a Full Refund, but (hang onto your
hat!). . .
The Free Gifts are yours to KEEP!
How's that for being sure that Enlightenment is right for you?
Friends, this is a serious business and we need serious people.

Heck, if I thought you weren't serious, I wouldn't even let you
sign up, that's how serious I am. The real question is. . .
How serious are you?

Now, let me ask you again. . .
How much would you pay for full and
abiding Spiritual Enlightenment?
How much would it be worth to you to convert your tired,
worn-out spiritual practice into a thriving, dynamic
enlightenment machine?
A THOUSAND dollars? A MILLION dollars? MORE?!?
No way, man! That’s where I draw the line! The last time I
checked, a million dollars was still a lot of money!
You need an AFFORDABLE enlightenment,

and that’s where Master Ned REALLY SHINES!!!

Are you ready for the
Deal of a Lifetime?
This entire course normally costs
$19,995.95
but if you take advantage of this special offer
and act right now, Spiritual Success! can be yours...
NOT for $18,000.00

NOT for $12,000.00
NOT for $6,000.00
NOT for $3,000.00
NOT for $2,000.00
but for the Super-Low price of only
$1,499.95!!
That’s an amazing $18,496.00 off the
already low, low price!!!
That’s right! For less than the cost of your yearly cable
subscription, you can experience the abundant blessings of a
fully enlightened life! Pick up the phone and get started on
your Spiritual Success journey today!
Yes, friend, Spiritual

Enlightenment IS right for you!

Act Now to make all your Spiritual
Dreams come true today!
Operators are standing by!

Have a Spiritually Enlightened Day!
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Ad for Guru Ned’s Enlightenment MasterClass 1 of 33

If you are happy with your current spiritual path

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