DESCRIPTION

An essay on how an event in

life helps one transition into

a better version of oneself

while one also learns an

emergent truth of life along

the journey.

HUZAIFA TARIQ - 23963

English Grammar and

ONCE/NOW ESSAY
Composition- EGC
Once I was obese and depressed; now, I am healthy and have self-content.

“Hey, four-eyes! How many fingers am I holding?” asks a blustering bully with his eyes wide

open and a sense of over-confidence on his face. “2 fingers and that browbeating personality

too.” I answer with a subtle smile. My answer would have been its antithesis if I hadn’t gone

through the process of self-reflecting over the years.

With losing 66 pounds, I also lost that deep craving for validation. I now knew and had a firm

belief that happiness is not supposed to be relative but absolute. I don’t wait for others to tell me

about myself because they only see an outer image. Instead, I have built up my self-confidence

and made myself realize that no one knows my abstract self. And that I’m content with what I’ve

achieved with myself so far.

My change now reflects on my body too. I am more active now than I ever was. I’ve played

badminton for my college, and I’ve never been happier than I am now with myself. I walk with

pride, like a king in his kingdom, without the thought of what others will think of me. I dress to

please myself now, and that confidence and self-satisfaction I feel; I searched through others.

“I will not lose, for even in defeat, there’s a valuable lesson learned, so it evens up for me.”

-Shawn Corey Carter (Jay-Z).

Transitioning in a stereotypical society takes a lot of guts, and people often hurt you so much that

one starts self-harming himself. But one who stands firm on his ground, with fire in his eyes and

goals to attain aces the game. There are times when you feel hopeless and lonely, with no one to

reach out to, and that’s the test of your dedication and perseverance.

I used to be bullied a lot over my weight. Fat kids are often body-shamed and made fun of, but I

used to get beaten a lot. It would be an average evening playing soccer, and someone would say,
“Hey fatso! You are the football.” I used to ignore these types of people, but they didn’t use to

let me go and keep on bullying for fun, and it eventually ended up with me getting beaten. I used

to cry myself to sleep every night, like an innocent infant. It went up to a point when I used to

harm myself because the bullies made me hate myself. That was my breaking point.

I wanted to lose my excess weight under societal pressure, so I had started to starve myself. Just

to be accepted and relevant. I used to seek validation and acceptance only to over-shadow my

fear of not being bullied. I was in a void, torture that I had to deal with every day. It affected me

in a way that I became dim-witted and less socially interactive. I used to avoid the company of

friends because I feared getting bullied again.

Looking back at my past self, I see a boy who is prone to opinions and overthinking. His

innocence ends up hurting him mentally. But when I look at myself now, I picture a guy who has

done what others dream. He has accepted his flaws and doesn’t care about others’ opinions. He

focuses on self-reflecting and believes that happiness comes from within.