Journal of Leisure Research

ISSN: (Print) (Online) Journal homepage: https://www.tandfonline.com/loi/ujlr20

Widowhood and leisure: An exploration of leisure’s

role in coping and finding a new self

Sarah H. Standridge , Rudy Dunlap , Douglas A. Kleiber & Ronald H. Aday

To cite this article: Sarah H. Standridge , Rudy Dunlap , Douglas A. Kleiber & Ronald H. Aday
(2020): Widowhood and leisure: An exploration of leisure’s role in coping and finding a new self,
Journal of Leisure Research, DOI: 10.1080/00222216.2020.1844553

To link to this article: https://doi.org/10.1080/00222216.2020.1844553

Published online: 10 Dec 2020.

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JOURNAL OF LEISURE RESEARCH
https://doi.org/10.1080/00222216.2020.1844553

Widowhood and leisure: An exploration of leisure’s role in

coping and finding a new self
Sarah H. Standridgea , Rudy Dunlapb, Douglas A. Kleiberc, and Ronald H. Adayd
a
Department of Sport, Exercise, Recreation, and Kinesiology, East Tennessee State University, Johnson
City, TN, USA; bDepartment of Health and Human Performance, Middle Tennessee State University,
Murfreesboro, TN, USA; cDepartment of Counseling and Human Development Services, University of
Georgia, Athens, GA, USA; dDepartment of Sociology and Anthropology, Middle Tennessee State
University, Murfreesboro, TN, USA

ABSTRACT KEYWORDS
The loss of a spouse is a significantly stressful life event that can Coping; older women;
negatively affect social connections, life satisfaction, and mental social leisure; widowhood;
health. This study looked at leisure’s role in helping study partici- women and aging
pants move forward and establish what life looks like as a widow.
In-depth interviews were conducted with 13 widowed women
regarding their leisure activities and the potential benefits to their
coping process. Findings indicated that participants often sought out
social groups and leisure activities based on their changing needs
(e.g., for distraction, companionship, support). Relationship dynamics
with friends changed, leading them to seek out new social groups.
Analysis showed that social leisure benefited these women by pro-
viding connections with women in similar situations and also served
as a tool for their own personal evolution and realization of a new
reality as a single woman.

The loss of a spouse can be an isolating experience, leaving the surviving partner to
grieve not only the death of the loved one but also the loss of their planned life together
as a couple (Neimeyer, 2005). Widowhood disproportionately affects women. Just over
40% of women age 65 and over are widowed copared to 13% of older men (Konigsberg,
2017). Society seems to view widows as a subculture “submerged in loneliness, chiding
each other for self-pity, advising each other to keep busy, individually hoping for an
avenue of escape, and collectively succumbing to an attitude of hopelessness” (Barrett,
1977, p. 856). Adjusting to the loss of a spouse is difficult in many respects, but the
“identity foreclosure” that happens where women are treated differently in places that
used to seem familiar and by people who are close friends can make one of the most
difficult tasks learning how to reenter the world and keep moving forward in a new
social role (van den Hoonaard, 1997, p. 537).
Leisure, often being social in nature, has proven to be a useful tool for overcoming
social barriers, establishing new social connections, and a way to find comfort in new
social roles (Hayosh, 2017). A strong sense of belonging and social support is important
for the coping process because it buffers the detrimental effects of stress on physical

CONTACT Sarah H. Standridge standridges@etsu.edu

ß 2020 National Recreation and Park Association
2 S. H. STANDRIDGE ET AL.

and mental well-being (Iso-Ahola & Park, 1996). Isherwood et al. (2012) found that
many widowed individuals reported an enhanced level of social engagement and
increased participation in social leisure over the first 6 years of widowhood.
The current research on widowhood has focused on a variety of changes and chal-
lenges women face after the loss of a spouse like social support (King et al., 2019; Utz
et al., 2002, 2014), mental health (Perrig-Chiello et al., 2016; Wilcox et al., 2003), and
coping processes (Ryckebosch-Dayez et al., 2016; Taylor & Stanton, 2007). To this point
few studies have looked at leisure’s role as part of the widowhood journey. As widowed
women progress through the dynamic process of rebuilding their social world leisure
experiences could prove to be a beneficial part of this process. To gain better insight
regarding widowed women’s social leisure experiences after the loss of a spouse, this
interpretive study examined the nuanced nature of widowed women’s social reality and
the role social leisure plays in helping them realize a new identity. Semi-structured
interviews with 13 widowed women between the ages of 65 and 91 provided a broad
range of experiences to explore. This study provides a look into the role of leisure,
more specifically social leisure, in the reorganization of life after spousal loss and was
guided by the question: How does social leisure aid in the construction of new social
identities after spousal loss?

Background
The importance of social support to widowed women has been widely studied; as a key
component of successful adjustment to widowhood its effects cannot be ignored
(Adams et al., 2011). If social needs are not met, loss of a spouse can lead to mental
and physical health issues (e.g., Ten Bruggencate et al., 2018). Previous research on how
individuals negotiate major role transitions, like the loss of a spouse, have produced
many explanations regarding how social networks can assist in adjusting to the changes
(i.e. Jacobson et al., 2017; O’Brien, 1985; Powers et al., 2014). van den Hoonaard (1997)
describes the process of “identity foreclosure” (p. 537). She notes three levels in which
this process takes place: (1) widows do not recognize themselves; (2) they do not know
how their friends see them; and (3) they do not know how they fit into society (van
den Hoonaard, 1997).

Social support in widowhood

Widowed women are at a greater risk for social isolation and loneliness than other
older adult populations (Isherwood et al., 2012). The emotional support of friends and
family is an important factor for successful adjustment to the loss of a spouse (Van
Baarsen et al., 2002). Adjusting to life after spousal loss does not come about without a
period of turmoil where widowed women and members of their social network may
struggle to find a new balance and new ways to relate (de Vries et al., 2014). Social
interactions after a spouse has passed can be difficult because of uncertainties regarding
how to behave (Utz et al., 2002), ambiguities about what support can be expected from
friends (Ha, 2008), and figuring out how to navigate a world that seems to be made for
couples (van den Hoonaard, 2006). In the early stages of bereavement, emotional
 JOURNAL OF LEISURE RESEARCH 3

support from adult children is the kind most frequently received by widowed women
(Ha, 2008). The sense of freedom and choice associated with friendship often creates
more meaningful relationships than interactions with family which tend to be more
obligatory (Utz et al., 2014). Support from friends is generally centered around social
activities (Chambers, 2005). Studies have shown that widowed women associate their
highest levels of well-being when they are with other widowed or single women
(Bankoff, 1983). While there is recent evidence of leisure’s role in coping with daily life
stressors (e.g., Iwasaki & Mannell, 2000), traumatic injury (e.g., Hutchinson et al., 2003)
the extent of social leisure’s benefits in the context of widowhood is not well under-
stood. This study aims to provide a much needed, nuanced look at how social support
through leisure is beneficial in the bereavement process.

Social leisure
Social leisure can be defined as shared experiences that are social in nature, performed
during free time and done by choice (Duncan et al., 2018). Leisure activities done with
others have been associated with better physical and emotional well-being as compared
to those pursued singly (Adams et al., 2011). The short interruption of negative feelings
can be beneficial in starting to generate more positive emotions (Folkman &
Moskowitz, 2000). Going to dinner with grandkids might not take away the negative
feelings that result from the loss of a partner, but it can provide a brief distraction from
them. The opportunity to meet up with old friends for coffee can provide a sense of
continuity while seeking out other widows who have successfully navigated their way
through the loss of a spouse could spark encouragement (i.e., “If they can do it, so can
I.”). Social activities have also been shown to reduce stress, enhance morale (Patterson
& Carpenter, 1994).
The social opportunities available to older people influence their ability to adapt to
certain social situations; for example, when older adults do not have nuclear family
members, the emotional closeness of social connections appears to be more important
for satisfaction of socioemotional needs (Lang et al., 1998). Older women who have no
remaining family members after a spouse passes may find social interactions with
friends unsatisfying because they lack the emotional closeness of family ties (Pinquart,
2003). For older women who still have children available to fill that void of emotional
closeness, outings with friends may be more enjoyable because they serve as a way to
simply have fun rather than a way to replace the emotional intimacy they had with their
late spouse (Pinquart, 2003).
The individuality of the experiences from grieving, bereavement, and coping makes it
difficult to formulate a consensus on the role of social leisure in the coping process and
leisure’s function vis-a-vis coping efforts is difficult to generalize. Socioeconomic status,
level of dependence on the spouse, and performance of gender-specific tasks also appar-
ently affect how women adjust to widowhood (e.g., Carr et al., 2000). Events surround-
ing their spouse’s passing also affect women’s adjustment to widowhood. The
unexpected passing of a spouse can create an intense sense of shock, which may pro-
long grief and produce excessive physical and emotional trauma in contrast to those
women whose spouses had declined over time (Straub & Roberts, 2001). Locus of
4 S. H. STANDRIDGE ET AL.

control may also play a role in how well women handle the bereavement process
(Balaswamy & Richardson, 2001). In one study, bereaved individuals who felt they had
greater control over life and their capacity to deal with death reported less anxiety and
depression (Jacobson et al., 2017).
Many studies on leisure and coping have focused on changes in leisure patterns fol-
lowing the loss of a spouse (i.e., Janke et al., 2008a; Patterson & Carpenter, 1994) and
the benefits leisure can provide for coping with a variety of different life events (i.e.,
Hutchinson et al., 2003; Iwasaki, 2002; Kleiber et al., 2002; Nimrod et al., 2012). The
number of studies that focus on how leisure affects widowed women’s health and well-
being following the loss of a spouse are limited (Janke et al., 2008b; Jhan & Chiao,
2012; Lee et al., 2019; Patterson, 1996; Patterson & Carpenter, 1994). As chronicled
above, coping with the loss of a partner is difficult and causes upheaval to several
aspects of life. Deciphering the relationship between leisure and coping is not a new
undertaking, previous literature has provided a reasonable basis for leisure’s ability to
be beneficial in coping with a variety of stressful life events. The goal for the current
study is to provide a better understanding of how leisure can be a useful tool in adjust-
ing to life after the loss of a spouse by answering the question: How does social leisure
aid in the construction of new social identities after spousal loss?

Methods
This study took a qualitative approach to examine participants’ experiences of reorgan-
izing life after losing a spouse and the role that social leisure played in helping them
adjust to life as widows. A constructionist epistemology and interpretive approach to
inquiry (Creswell & Poth, 2018; Crotty, 1998) allowed for consideration of the nuances
of participants’ daily lives as well as their interpretive processes. Thus, the aim of this
study was not to create generalizable truths about woman who are widowed, but rather
to gain an in-depth knowledge of the experiences of a small, homogenous group of
older adult women thereby offering useful information for other women of similar age,
social and racial backgrounds. This study also serves as a starting point for further
research. A comprehensive discussion of widowhood for older adults is beyond the
scope of a single article; however, it is important to acknowledge that widowhood and
spousal or long-term partner loss are not experiences exclusive to cisgender, heterosex-
ual women. Lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer or questioning [LGBTQ] indi-
viduals were not included as part of the current study due to the distinct historical and
social contexts they face related to caregiving, social isolation, and access to competent
care which could affect their bereavement experience (Brunson et al., 2019).

Recruitment
Participants were recruited through fliers at three senior centers located in a rural
county of the southeastern United States. The services provided by local senior centers,
such as leisure activities, social engagement opportunities, and support groups made
them ideal for participant recruitment. Subsequent snowball sampling where existing
participants recommended additional potential participants increased access to the
 JOURNAL OF LEISURE RESEARCH 5

Table 1. Participant demographic information.

Pseudonym Age Population Occupation Widowed Years married Relationship status
Ashley 71 Youngest-old Admin Asst 11 years 30 Dating
Dawn 85 Oldest-old Retired 6 years 61 Single
Irene 68 Youngest-old Office Mgr 4.5 years 26 Single
Iris 91 Oldest-old Retired 21 years 48 Single
Jane 91 Oldest-old Retired 14 years 52 Single
Jean 73 Youngest-old Retired 13 years 44 Single
Jewel 86 Oldest-old Retired 12 years 56 Single
Martha 69 Youngest-old Retired 7 years 29 Single
Opal 89 Oldest-old Retired 1 year 68 Single
Pam 65 Youngest-old Retired 4 years 14 Dating
Pearl 75 Middle-old Retired 6 years 49 Single
Ruby 85 Oldest-old Retired 21 years 43 Single
Wanda 76 Middle-old Retired 15 years 42 Single

population of interest and also facilitated rapport (Patton, 2002). Potential participants
were instructed to contact the first author by email or telephone. Prospective partici-
pants were asked initial demographic questions to ensure they met the inclusion criteria
before interviews were scheduled. The inclusion criteria for this study were that women
be age 65 or older, had been widowed for at least 1 year, and were in good mental
health. We recognize that mental health is complex, but for the purposes of this study
was simply defined as having no clinically diagnosed disorders (e.g., depression, anxiety,
dementia). Participants mental health status was self-reported as part of the initial
demographic questionnaire. The length of time spent as a widow was not limited due to
the incongruity of the widowhood experience; women reach different milesteones and
stages of their adjustment at different times.

Sample
The 13 women in this study were between the ages of 65 and 91, Caucasian, identified
as heterosexual, and had been widowed between one and 21 years. All participants were
in good mental health and lived in one of three cities in the southeastern United States.
Only two women were still working at the time of the interviews. All lived independ-
ently in single family homes, but had at least one family member that they visited with
regularly in person (e.g., adult children, siblings, or cousins). The demographic informa-
tion for participants in this study regarding age, relationship status, and years spent as a
widow are presented in Table 1.

Data collection
Semi-structured interviews were conducted at the participant’s preferred location (par-
ticipant’s home or local community center) to ensure a comfortable environment for
conversation and were approximately one hour long. Participants read and signed
informed consent forms before interviews began. Interviews were digitally recorded,
transcribed, and coded throughout the data collection process using the constant com-
parative method (Creswell & Poth, 2018). Detailed fieldnotes were kept throughout the
interviewing process to aid in the understanding of participants’ experiences.
Pseudonyms were used to guarantee confidentiality. A 30-question interview guide was
6 S. H. STANDRIDGE ET AL.

used to promote conversation with the goal of being able to understand if and how leis-
ure activities have played a role in these women’s coping strategies. Participants were
asked about their initial feelings and responses to their spouse’s passing and any major
adjustments they noticed soon afterward. Questions included: Can you tell me about
your initial reaction to his passing? How did you deal with your loss in the beginning?
What kind of activities did you engage in early on? Subsequent questions focused on
participants’ experiences of how their routines and lifestyle have changed over time:
How has your free time changed since his passing? What activities were beneficial in
helping you navigate all of the changes? Interviews were conducted and transcribed by
the first author, and participants were contacted via phone by the first author to share a
summary of the study and their interview to complete member checks. Transcripts of
the participants’ interviews were shared with them and they were asked if their
responses were accurate as a way of member checking. This served to verify participants
were accurately represented (Henderson, 2006). All participants responded positively
regarding representation.

Data analysis
The analysis process began with listening to the recordings of participant interviews.
Researchers reviewed field notes and the transcriptions of the interviews line-by-line
and significant passages were noted. Open coding identified emerging themes by
reviewing participants’ depictions of their leisure participation, coping process, and
accounts of their evolution since the death of their spouse (Saldana, 2015). To establish
a consensus and add to the trustworthiness of the analytic process, the second author
read and coded the transcripts separately from the first author. The first and second
authors met regularly to discuss emerging themes and connections. Related codes were
grouped into themes, and content was thematically analyzed to start synthesizing the
study’s findings (Ezzy, 2002; Henning et al., 2004). Taking an inductive approach
allowed for themes to be identified over the course of the data collection process (cf.
Ezzy, 2002). Comparing the emerging themes back to the original data allowed for
inconsistencies to be identified and for patterns to be supported across the data set.
Finalized themes were compared back to the data to ensure their coherence and accur-
acy to the interviews (Auerbach & Silverstein, 2003).

Findings
While widowhood is unique for everyone, there were many common threads in these
women’s stories. First, added to their sense of loss was the experience that previous
social connections evolved in ways they did not expect. Next, seeking out social leis-
ure opportunities to escape negative feelings eventually became a way to establish
new social circles where they felt supported and understood. Finally, most of the
women found themselves comfortable with being single and enjoying their
new reality.
 JOURNAL OF LEISURE RESEARCH 7

Changing relationships
For these women, the continuity of friendships was gone, so they found themselves
wondering where to go next? Participants used phrases like “surprised” and “shocked,”
when discussing the disconnect that happened between themselves and married friends.
Jean described her confusion, saying “When you’re not a couple, you lose friends … I
don’t know why … but you do.” Similarly, Ashley talked about her ineffective attempts
to find continuity in her social life:
You would go out with your couple friends and all of a sudden … you go from a couple
to a single, and it’s just, it’s a total different world … being a third wheel, fifth wheel, you
know … because you would go out with your couple friends and all of a sudden, you
know, and then they feel like they ought to be obligated to pay my bills.
Ashley’s experience highlighted the struggle to find ways to relate; she felt uncomfort-
able in situations that used to be enjoyable, but members of her social network she had
been close with were also unsure of how to handle the situation. Irene had been hosting
a couple’s Bible study in her home and tried to continue doing so but expressed her
surprise that an activity she had found comfort in and looked forward to with her hus-
band had instead become a place where she felt like an outsider. “The dynamic that
I didn’t realize was that once you become single and you’ve got all these married
friends … they’re still your dear friends but that dynamic has changed totally, and they
don’t understand.”
There was no discussion of animosity or bitterness toward their friends; just the sur-
prise that so many friends from married life were no longer a reliable source of support.
The loss of once close friends seemed to compound the already difficult loss of a spouse
because not only had their primary source of support and biggest confidant left them,
so had their secondary sources.
Martha (69, widowed 7 years) recalled her first camping trip without her husband;
the same group she had been camping with for years invited her out just weeks after
her husband passed as a gesture of support.
So, all my little camping friends, we all ended up in Nashville, we were sitting out on this
big deck … . they live in West End and we were celebrating Cinco de Mayo. I was sitting
there going, ‘something’s really weird here’. Nobody would mention his name, and it was
driving me crazy.
Her camping friends were unsure how to act or what topics were safe to discuss, and
Martha was unsure of how to express her need to acknowledge her past life while mov-
ing forward with her new one. The majority of the women in this study discussed at
least one memorable social engagement where the discomfort for themselves and others
seemed to confirm their social identity as a widow.
None of these women voiced interest in formal support groups. Instead, most saw
them as a tool for others but not for themselves. Pam (65, widowed 4 years) described
what she imagined grief support groups to be like: (mimics sobbing) “ten years, I’ve
already been widowed ten years’” I just wasn’t like that and I thought ‘am I weird?’ It
doesn’t affect me in that way. I guess everybody does things a lot differently.” She per-
ceived support groups as a place for women who wanted a place to commiserate and
cry together. She saw herself as different from the women she thought attended those
8 S. H. STANDRIDGE ET AL.

groups, which was echoed throughout the participants’ responses when asked if grief
support groups played a part in their coping. Iris’s (91, widowed 21 years) reaction
was similar:
I had some call me and say, we have a class on grief, why don’t you come? I said, no,
I’m not coming because I had a doctor that worked at the local University talk with
me and she said that I didn’t need to go to a grief counseling. I was doing great.
While her reasoning for declining the invitation was based on a conversation with a
local physician, she gives the impression that grief support groups were for people who
might not being doing “great.”

Leisure as distraction and reinvention

In order to find new paths forward, some participants actively sought out ways to “stay
busy” or fill a time frame that had been important when their spouses were still alive.
Leisure as a way to find distraction was a key part of the coping process for the women
in this study and a major theme in this study. Ashley (71, widowed 11 years) struggled
the most on Friday nights when she and her husband used to always have Mexican
food and margaritas.
Friday nights were always tough on me because we always had a Friday night date. I’d sit
down out here in the parking lot … and everybody going "oh you know what I’m doing
tonight?!" I had nothing … finally, I had this friend that would call me every Friday night,
and he would talk about his mom and his dad and his dad’s health problems. All I had to
do is just listen …
Pearl (75, widowed 6 years) had a hard time being home in the afternoons when she
was accustomed to her husband coming home from work, so she sought out activities
with her new Sunday school class to keep from watching the clock.
I still stayed busy, then all of a sudden, the worst time, was around 3:00 or 4:00 in the
afternoon when it was time for him to come home, and he didn’t come. And that was,
that was probably the hardest adjustment … we do things as a Sunday school class a lot
and so that, that helps … we’re a really close Sunday school class so that really helps.
Jean (73, widowed 13 years) found being alone with her thoughts was difficult. She vol-
unteered and sought out other women with similar interests. “You know I play cards
once a week with a bunch of Christian ladies. Um, I just try to stay busy. Like I say,
I’m not good at just staying home by myself.” While participants kept describing these
activities as a way to “stay busy,” their goal appears to have been distraction.
Significantly, somewhere in the process, there was a switch from using activity as a
distraction to actively considering leisure as a tool for reinvention. Jewel and Opal
were exceptions. This could be, in part, because they were both unable to drive hin-
dering their ability to explore new leisure opportunities. The women discussed their
experiences finding new passions that they enjoyed and found beneficial in helping
them realize a new identity. Irene (68, widowed 4.5 years) expresses some of her
realizations:
Being single … there’s a certain amount of freedom that comes with being single. I don’t
have to worry about anybody else’s schedule, I don’t have to cook dinner. I can pretty
 JOURNAL OF LEISURE RESEARCH 9

much do what I want to do, what I’ve realized … you don’t realize it but so much of
your identity is linked to that individual. Even though we had a very good
relationship … and he valued my opinion and so forth what you realize is when you’re
in a relationship you’re always kind of compromising. It’s not like a real sacrifice, but
you’re just always making decisions based upon on what you know the needs and
preferences are of the other person. Trying to figure out now who I am and what it is
that I want to do … it’s scary but I’m starting to do this bucket list of things I really
want to do.
As with all things in the bereavement process, the timeline for when and how this pro-
cess occurred was different for each person, but once the realization that social net-
works and comfortable routines had permanently changed, there was a turning point.
After realizing that many relationships had changed, the next part of their social
adjustment was to seek out other women in similar situations. Having other women to
talk with whom they share a similar experience was appealing for the support and pro-
vided opportunities to immerse themselves in new groups and form new connections.
Irene (68, widowed 4.5 years) found connections with another woman whose husband
died around the same time:
This other lady that had been in our small group, she lost her husband after Bill passed
away. So, she and I would go out to dinner about once a week or once every couple of
weeks. I had another friend at church who has lost her husband, so I tried to spend more
time with people in similar roles.
After a few months attempting to find comfort in the couples Sunday school class, Jean
(73, widowed 13 years) switched, so she could be in one with other widowed women.
“It got to be sort of awkward, you know … when I came into the Sunday school class
that I’m in now; it’s all women and there’s several widows in there, so we understand
each other, you know.” The word “understanding” came up frequently when these
women were looking for new social groups; while widowhood was not a requirement,
being able to understand single life seemed to be a more pertinent requirement for
potential friend groups. as Ashley (71, widowed 11 years) found a group that she
enjoyed but left when they started inviting married women.
So, there was another lady here … that had just gotten a divorce, and she was having a
tough time. So, I call her and go, “hey, you want to go with this?” So, we go, and that was
my first initial female interaction … it was a lot of fun because it was single women, and
we could go eat and do stuff … but then they started inviting married women and it wasn’t
near as much fun.
Ashley said the married women changed the dynamics of the group, resulting in less
spontaneity. Opal (89, widowed 1 year) similarly recalls, “I probably started reaching out
more towards single friends.” Beyond the lack of understanding that married friends
have, she discussed the freedom of single friends to initiate activity.
I won’t call my married friends and say, "Hey, let’s go do this." You see, and that’s kind of
a different thing; when you’re single you can do whatever you want to do, and you drop it
at spur of the moment, and you’re gone.
The progression through the early stages of coping with a spouse’s passing, searching
for continuity from established social groups, to the search for understanding from new
social groups required a process of innovation and exploration.
10 S. H. STANDRIDGE ET AL.

Using leisure in a new reality

This final theme was more prevalent among the 10 women who had been widowed lon-
ger (6 years or more). In addition to finding peace in new social roles, several partici-
pants mentioned reaching a point where they realized that their late husbands would no
longer recognize the life they have built on their own, a new reality. They found new
interests, had newly established social networks, and adjusted in other ways to life on
their own. Irene (68, widowed 4.5 years) acknowledged missing the life she and her hus-
band had planned together but also realized she had created a new routine that did not
include him.
I miss the life we had planned, but there was a point about two, two-and-a-half years into
it and … I thought, if he came back into my life right now … I would have to make
major readjustments. I had become so accustomed to life without him.
Jewel (86, widowed 12 years) also talked about how much she realized that she has
changed since her husband passed away.
So, I am a total different person. That’s why I don’t think I could ever remarry again,
because I don’t think I could ever go back to … that kind of world. Where you … first of
all, I don’t ever want to wrap everything around one person again. That’s scary. There’s
not a single thing in my life now that I would have done had he not passed away.
Jewel and her husband had been married for 56 years when he passed away. She
became more involved at church; she and her husband always just attended Sunday
school and church service. After he passed Jewel started going to Triple L, an older
women’s group that has lunch together once a month and traveled with friends. Jewel’s
expanded social circles provided not only a place to feel supported but also served as
outlets for leisure activities she had not been a part of when she was married.
Ashley’s husband died very unexpectedly 11 years earlier, and she described their
nights together at home fondly but acknowledged that she has enjoyed the active life-
style she has adopted over the last few years.
I was the [marathon] cheering committee chairman. The third year my friend comes to me
and says, “I think we need to do the half marathon." And I said, "I think you are fucking
crazy!” Didn’t practice, did it. So, then she [my friend] said we need to start riding bikes.
So, we did, we got us some bikes. So, she got me into physical activity. Then I had a
bunch of girls that said, "Hey, let’s go to Costa Rica." There was eight of us women. So,
I started traveling, and see, Eric did not like to travel.
She expressed earlier how much she missed the Friday night Mexican food dates and
initially sought out activities to distract her from the Friday night reminders of her loss.
Now, years later, her leisure activities and social circles look vastly different but
still fulfilling.

Discussion
These findings add some complexity to the question of the role social leisure plays in
the coping process. Initially, social activities might accentuate negative emotions and
increase frustration, but as time progresses they seem to be a welcome distraction, a
means to find support and understanding, a way to generate optimism about the future,
 JOURNAL OF LEISURE RESEARCH 11

and finally, a way to recognize new realities. Social interaction is one of the most fre-
quently reported reasons for engaging in leisure; so it is not surprising that these
women would find leisure activities as a favorable means to explore new social roles
(Auld & Case, 1997). These women were seeking understanding from others who could
empathize and would not treat them as pariahs. While leisure activities are enjoyable
and are often associated with life satisfaction (Auld & Case, 1997), the combination of
leisure and social interactions is what women in this study found beneficial. Over time,
leisure offered a context for reconstructing a sense of self in the embracing of new leis-
ure activities, new action patterns and new relationships that were quite different from
what they experienced before.

Social leisure
This article began with the suggestion that social leisure plays an integral role in the
coping process for widowed women. There is a resonance to previous research estab-
lishing the role of leisure as a resource in transcending negative life events (Kleiber
et al., 2002). Social leisure served as an initial distraction from unpleasantness (self-pro-
tection) and as opportunity to recover some of themselves through interaction with new
companions (self-restoration). Social leisure also allowed for the exploration of new
activities and interactions (personal transformation). Even with the evidence that some
social leisure interactions were initially destabilizing and even unpleasant in exacerbat-
ing the sense of loss, it was clear that new relationships and activity patterns were com-
forting for the widows in this study. It also offered a means of reconstructing reality in
ways that were personally transformative.
Some women in this study were more purposeful in seeking out new social groups
that included more widowed women, such as Irene who changed to a widow’s Bible
study group. While for other women like Martha, whose camping group slowly evolved
from old familiar faces to new friends, the process happened more organically. Martha
said she did not know how she ended up with the friends she has now, she was just
“being open” and now her social circles include very few people who knew her late hus-
band. These findings align with previous work that has illustrated as widowed women
deal with not only the loss of a key figure in their social network but connections with
a spouse’s family and friends (Donnelly & Hinterlong, 2010) and relationship dynamics
with married friends can also change (Barrett, 1977). To overcome the changing rela-
tionship dynamics the women in this study emphasized the value of finding other
women who could relate to and understand issues entailed in the loss of a spouse.
Navigating through the process of coping, from the realization of changes, to
reorganization of social opportunities, to innovation of new social persona, has been
well-illustrated in this study. While the term widow tends to carry a negative connota-
tion, these women were able to successfully navigate the stresses of losing a spouse by
utilizing leisure as a tool for distraction from negative feelings or thoughts and eventu-
ally as a tool for reinvention. McFarland and Pals (2005) found similar results regarding
social leisure’s ability to aid in developing and to reinforcing a new identity. For these
women, their sense of self emerged as a part of their reinvention process, they were
able to find a continuity between what life was and what it looks like now.
12 S. H. STANDRIDGE ET AL.

New identities
Participants reached a point where the spontaneity available as a single woman was
appreciated as a new reality where they can lead a socially engaged, fulfilling life. This
phenomenon, which Lopata (1973) called “blossoming,” has continued to be a recurring
theme in the literature on widowhood (Bonanno et al., 2004; Lee & Bakk, 2001; van
den Hoonaard, 2006). The current study echoes sentiments that Lee and Bakk (2001)
found in their study examining later life transition in widowhood improvements in
women’s personal and social lives showed through increased engagement in enjoyable
activities, improved self-esteem, and increased freedom. Son et al. (2007) study focused
on older women’s health and well-being described how feeling successful in the devel-
opment of new roles, contributed to women’s confidence. Similarly, participants in this
study seemed to start seeing social leisure as an effective tool for reinvention once they
had passed those initial discomforts of their new role. Through leisure these women
were able to adjust to the label of widow, as Hayosh (2017) found previously, social leis-
ure served as a way to find comfort in their new identity. While leisure opportunities
uncomfortably confirmed their new identity, leisure also allowed them to ultimately
find the sense of belonging and support to embrace widowhood.

Implications for practice

This study provides vital information for community groups that offer services for older
adults, given participants’ disinterest in formal grief support groups; finding other single
women to interact with was preferable to more formal group settings. However, it is
important to acknowledge two possible reasons participants in this study may have not
been interested in support groups: support systems in place before their spouses passed
and access to other widowed women. All participants had a history of involvement with
religious organizations and at least one family member who was able to visit regularly
(e.g., adult children, siblings, or cousins). Participants’ age and phase of life meant their
social network often included friends or acquaintances who had already lost a spouse,
making access to other widowed women more common than it might be for younger
women. A better understanding of how and when social leisure opportunities are bene-
ficial to bereaved women could have major implications for senior centers, religious
groups, and family members who want to support widowed women. It is important to
not ignore the interest in social activities, instead or in addition to formal grief support
services, individuals and agencies who would like to support widows might simply pro-
vide information on local card playing groups, running groups, dinner clubs, or other
social groups catering primarily to widowed women. Given the findings in this study,
future efforts should be made to focus on supporting community-based programs that
promote social involvement for older widowed women and encourage engagement in
the community.

Limitations and future research

Several limitations of this study help identify potential avenues for future research. For
example, this study focuses purely on women’s experiences of widowhood and social
 JOURNAL OF LEISURE RESEARCH 13

readjustment, and previous studies have pointed out the very gendered nature of
widowhood (Lee et al., 2017; Sasson & Umberson, 2014). The gender differences in
dealing with the loss of a spouse could mean that leisure’s part in coping for older men
and older women could differ. A similar investigation of widowers’ experiences might
offer different insight into the timing, opportunities for, and function of social leisure.
Additionally, while there was a range of educational attainment in this group of women,
there was a general lack of diversity, and all participants were white, middle-class
women, who identified as cisgender and heterosexual, from the southern United States.
Future studies exploring intersections of identity would be pertinent to understand the
unique challenges older adults of different identities might face after spousal or partner
loss. LGBTQ older adults grew up during time periods, prior to women’s and gay
liberation movements, when pervasive silence about sexual and gender identities, and
same-sex sexual behavior was severely stigmatized and gender roles were more strictly
proscribed (Fredriksen Goldsen et al., 2019). To appropriately explore the variations
and similarities in experiences of widowhood within multiple social and structural posi-
tions additional investigation is needed.

Conclusion
The benefits of leisure have been well documented for coping with a variety of life
events and circumstances (Coleman & Iso-Ahola, 1993; Hutchinson et al., 2008; Iwasaki
et al., 2005; Nimrod et al., 2012). Continued review of the role leisure plays in identify-
ing a new self-narrative, including a new identity as a single woman is warranted.
Leisure provided these women opportunities to choose social groups where they felt
understood and feel a strong sense of comradery that gave them a safe space to explore
the adjustment to widowhood and learn from other women who have already been
there. The positivity generated from these leisure pursuits created a sense of hope that
their loss may not be painful forever; that they could run a household on their own,
and enjoy meaningful leisure such as seeing the world, or running a marathon. Leisure
was not exclusively positive nor did it provide a faster route to getting over the loss of a
spouse, but the role that leisure played in these women’s progressions through the social
and emotional stresses showed that leisure does serve a valuable purpose and deserves
to be a part of the coping conversation. Reviewing the results of this study, it cannot be
denied that leisure played a role in the coping process for these women.

ORCID
Sarah H. Standridge http://orcid.org/0000-0002-3734-8460

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