BEAUTIFUL ME

THE HANCE FAMILY FOUNDATION PROUDLY PRESENTS

BEAUTIFUL ME
Presented By: The Hance Family Foundation 1
 THE HANCE FAMILY FOUNDATION IS A CERTIFIED 501(c)3
P.O. BOX 20795
FLORAL PARK, NY 11002
(516) 688-0055

LEARN MORE AT:

Selfesteemrising.org

2 Presented By: The Hance Family Foundation

 WELCOME TO

BEAUTIFUL ME
CREATED BY KATHRYN TUFFY, MS Ed., BCBA AND ELIZABETH MUNRO, LCSW

PHOTOGRAPHS BY: CAITIE MCCABE

DESIGN AND ILLUSTRATIONS BY: ALLIE CLOUSPY

© 2018, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

Presented By: The Hance Family Foundation 3

 JACKIE, WARREN, EMMA, ALYSON & KATIE HANCE

4 Presented By: The Hance Family Foundation

 INTRODUCTION

After Warren and Jackie Hance lost their three young daughters, Emma, Alyson, and Katie in a car
accident, they had a choice to make: to give in to the grief or to create a lasting legacy in honor
of their girls. They also wanted to support their local Floral Park, New York community, who had
loved and protected them in the face of unimaginable tragedy. The Hance Family Foundation was
created to give back to Floral Park by creating 3 scholarships in honor of their girls. In addition,
Warren and Jackie wished to share with others the lessons they had learned in the course of their
difficult journey:

Be accountable to others

Surround yourself with friends and family

Accept help when you need it

Forgive yourself and be patient with yourself

Find something or someone to be grateful for

Volunteer, volunteer, volunteer - focusing on others can turn tragedy into triumph

The Hance Family Foundation grew into a beloved symbol within the Floral Park community.
Due to this support, the Foundation became more focused, and evolved with the larger mission
of empowering women and girls beyond education. Their first program, Beautiful Me, was
designed to enhance self-esteem, increase positive body awareness, improve problem-solving,
and to help build healthy relationship skills for women and girls of all ages.

Warren and Jackie soon realized that they needed to share their mission with more communities
throughout the country. Self-Esteem Rising was created to bring the Hance Family Foundation’s
vision to a national level, and to encompass all of the Foundation’s projects, including Beautiful
Me, Raising a Beautiful Child and Empower Me.

While the Hance Family Foundation continues to be a beloved local organization, the Self-Esteem
Rising national initiative is helping to spread their mission to more women and girls every day.
So far, tens of thousands of people around the world have benefited from the Self-Esteem Rising
programs. With the continued support of the Foundation family and people like you, Emma,
Alyson, and Katie can continue to make enormous impact in the world.

Presented By: The Hance Family Foundation 5

 SECTION 1

SELF-REFLECTION
How do I spend my time? Who am I accountable to? How do I care for myself?

Emma
Alyson
Katie

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 SECTION 1

SELF-REFLECTION

One of my most
beautiful strengths is....

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 SECTION 1

SELF-REFLECTION

One of the most beautiful

parts of my body is...

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 SECTION 1

THE BATHING SUIT

When Alyson saw her older sister Emma trying on clothes, she couldn’t
help but notice the difference between their bodies. While Emma was tall and
thin, Alyson was shorter and more athletic. Emma confidently wore bikinis to
the beach, but when Alyson tried on a bikini, she didn’t feel confident at all.
She focused on the parts of the body that made her feel most insecure, crying
because she felt she had “Poppy’s belly” (her grandfather).

Alyson’s mother wanted her to understand that everybody’s body was differ-
ent. She wasn’t supposed to look like anybody else - she was the only Alyson,
after all. She should love her own body the way it was. In order to build her
confidence, Alyson’s mother decided to help her find a bathing suit that made her feel more comfortable.
Together, they found a tankini that made Alyson look good and feel good about herself.

Although Alyson’s mother wanted her to feel confident, she also wanted to help her daughter make
healthier choices going forward. She explained the concept of moderation - that we all need to be
careful about which foods we eat, and how much we eat. She encouraged Alyson to wait five minutes
before getting seconds at a meal, to ensure that she didn’t overeat. By discussing these topics openly
and honestly, Alyson was able to make her own rules about food and her body. Therefore, she was
able to make better choices about her body and health.

SELF-CARE RULES
What rules do you have for yourself?

What rules do you have for your body?

Do you talk about these rules with your family? With your friends?

Do you find that people react positively to these rules?

Presented By: The Hance Family Foundation 9

 SECTION 2

SELF-AWARENESS:
Be Your Own Super Hero

I am aware
I am...

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Presented By: The Hance Family Foundation 11
 able accepting active admiring adorable adored adventurous

affectionate afraid aggressive ambitious angry annoying anxious

apologetic artistic athletic awesome awkward beautiful big bold

boring bossy brave bright calm careful careless caring

cautious challenging charming cheerful childish clever clumsy

cold compassionate complicated confident confused considerate

cool cooperative courageous cranky creative critical curious cute

daring dark dazzling decisive dedicated delightful difficult

diligent distracted dizzy doubtful dramatic dreamer dull

dynamic eager easy-going efficient elegant embarrassed emotional

empathic encouraging energetic engaging enthusiastic excited

expert extraordinary fabulous faithful fancy fashionable fearless

feminine forceful frail free friendly frustrated fun-loving funny

fussy generous gentle gifted giving glamorous good gorgeous

gracious grateful great groovy gross grouchy grumpy

gullible handy happy hard-working healthy heavenly helpful

honest hopeful humble humorous idealistic ignorant imaginative

impatient imperfect important impulsive incredible indecisive

independent insecure insightful intelligent interesting intolerant

inventive irrational irritating jealous jittery jolly joyful judgmental

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Presented By: The
The Hance
Hance Family
Family Foundation
Foundation
lively logical lonely loud lovable lovely loving loyal magnificent

marvelous materialistic mature mean messy mighty mischievous

modest moody mushy mysterious naive nasty naughty neat

needy negative nervous nice noisy nosy nurturing obnoxious

observant odd opinionated optimistic ordinary organized outgoing

passionate passive patient perceptive perfect perfectionist persistent

pessimistic picky plain pleasant polite popular positive powerful

practical predictable pretty proper protective proud questioning

quiet rare rational realistic rebellious reflective relaxed reliable

religious resourceful respectful responsible restless rigid

romantic rough rude sad sarcastic sassy scary secretive

self-confident self-conscious self-disciplined selfish sensitive serious

shallow short shy silly sincere slim sloppy smart smooth

sometimes gross sparkling stable strange strong stubborn successful

sunny superficial sweet sympathetic talkative tall tearful tender

tense testy thoughtful thrilling tidy timid tiny tireless tolerant

tough tricky trusting trustworthy unassuming understanding

unhappy unique unlucky unresponsive unselfish upbeat vague

vain versatile violent warm warmhearted wasteful wide-eyed wild

willing wise witty wonderful worthwhile workable young youthful

Presented By: The Hance Family Foundation 13

 SECTION 2

THE PLAY
When Emma was cast as the lead role in her school play, she dedicated her-
self to preparing herself for the performance. Her hard work paid off, and the
play was a great success. Feeling confident, she decided to try out for a role in
another play at a local church. However, when she arrived at the audition, she
became overwhelmed with anxiety. What if she wasn’t as good as the other
girls at the audition? What if she didn’t get a role in the play? As these doubts
overwhelmed her, she started to cry and refused to get out of the car.

Her mother knew that, no matter what happened, the audition would be a
good experience for Emma. The situation would help her learn how to handle
disappointment and pride. Therefore, her mother told her that she had three
minutes to cry, and then she needed to go into the audition and try her best. If she didn’t get the part,
she could always find something else to try that she might also be good at.

After this pep talk, Emma managed to get out of the car and go to the audition. Despite feeling
nervous, scared, and perhaps envious of the other girls, she got up on stage and tried her best.
Even though she was cast in a secondary role, she still worked hard to prepare for the performance;
she wanted to do her best, regardless of which part she played.

Sharing her feelings with her mother helped Emma to overcome her anxiety and try something that she
was scared to do. Ultimately, she was able to take pride in her performance and to work hard to cultivate
her own talent.

SELF-AWARENESS:
Body Language Matters
Ask participants to silently act out the following:

Eyes: Wide open Eyes: Looking down

Head: Tilted to the side Feet: Shoulder width apart
Hands: On your hips Arms: Folded across chest

Eyes: Squinted Eyes: Darting around quickly

Head: Rubbing your chin Head: Shoulders up & tight
Feet: Tapping one foot Hands: Open & palms up

Eyes: Closed
Head: Tilted down
Hands: In pockets

14 Presented By: The Hance Family Foundation

Presented
Presented By:
By: The
The Hance
Hance Family
Family Foundation
Foundation 15
 SECTION 3

A LITTLE COMPLIMENT GOES

A LONG WAY
Even at 5 years old, Katie knew how important it was to recognize and acknowl-
edge the good in others. She also knew to appreciate those who recognized the
good within her. When her dad gave her a compliment, she would respond by
looking him in the eye and saying “Thank you!” This helped her confidence grow
and, in turn, helped her to bring out confidence in others. She never hesitated to
invite any boy or girl to play.

Katie was very open with her feelings. She would hug and kiss her friends and was
always sure to tell her parents and sisters how much she loved them. She made
sure that the people in her life knew that they were important to her. Because of
her confidence and attitude, she had many friends.

SELF-HELP:
Resolve to Resolve Conflict

1. A friend doesn’t seem to want to spend time with you and you have no idea why. What can you do?

2. Your friend has been saying really negative things about her own appearance. What can you do?

3. You wear an outfit that makes you feel confident, but notice that people are laughing at you
during the day. What can you do?

4. You find out that your friends have been spending time together without you and you feel as if
you’ve been left out intentionally. What can you do?

5. A “friend” you thought you knew well spreads embarrassing, inappropriate, or confidential
information about you. What can you do?

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 YOUR THOUGHTS ARE AN OPTION
Before Beautiful Me I thought... After Beautiful Me I think...

Reflect on the skills you learned days and weeks from now.
Personal growth is possible. It feels great to acknowledge
how far you’ve come.

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 SELF-ESTEEM IS A
SUPERPOWER!
We hope you’ve enjoyed the Beautiful Me program!

Remember the valuable lessons we learned together:

Share how you Find creative

define yourself solutions to
problems

Recognize the Explore your

good in others full range of
emotions

Create your Learn to

own rules accept help

Take pride in your Be confident in

achievements assisting others

Our Journey Continues at:

SELFESTEEMRISING.ORG

18 Presented By: The Hance Family Foundation

 LET’S CHANGE THE
WORLD TOGETHER!
Hance Family Foundation’s Programs:

BEAUTIFUL ME RAISING A EMPOWER ME

BEAUTIFUL CHILD

Our educational self-esteem
program for females of all ages.
Females from ages 5 through
105 learn how to think about
themselves with confidence and
greater insight.
Our seminar for anyone who is
responsible for the care of
a child. Learn how to connect
with your child in a unique way
and elevate their level
of independence.
Our innovative seminar
for women in corporate settings.
Women in the workplace learn
strategies to eliminate the
confidence gap.

Let’s continue the education!

UNLOCK another Beautiful Me activity by visiting:
WWW.SELFESTEEMRISING.ORG

CREATE YOUR INCREDIBLE ”SUPPORT SYSTEM NOTEBOOK”

Presented By: The Hance Family Foundation 19

20 Presented By: The Hance Family Foundation
 RAISING A BEAUTIFUL CHILD

Raising a Beautiful Child is a seminar offered to parents, educators,

caregivers and others who are entrusted with raising children. In the

seminar, adults are taught practical strategies and skills that will help

them activate self-esteem in the children they are for.

After attending Raising a Beautiful Child, adults will leave with new information that is vital to improving

their child’s:

Ability to develop Ability to develop
coping skills accurate self-awareness

Independence in their Ability to gain satisfaction

home and community from helping others

Raising a Beautiful Child will be presented at your site by Kate Tuffy MS Ed., BCBA. Our team will

customize your seminar, including timeline and donation, with your facility/school.

Interested in booking our Raising a Beautiful Child

seminar right now? Give us a call at 516-688-0055.

Presented By: The Hance Family Foundation 21

 SHARE YOUR NEW CONFIDENCE
WITH THE WORLD!
Purchase our merch:
WWW.SELFESTEEMRISING.ORG/SHOP1/

22 Presented By: The Hance Family Foundation

 Presented
Presented By:By:
TheThe Hance
Hance Family
Family Foundation
Foundation 23
 BEAUTIFUL ME
The Hance Family Foundation is a certified 501(c)3
P.O. Box 20795
Floral Park, NY 11002
(516) 688-0055

LEARN MORE AT:

Selfesteemrising.org

Emma, Alyson and Katie are forever in our hearts.

24 Presented By: The Hance Family Foundation