You And My Mom Are Getting Pretty Serious?

By
Matt Starr

9/14/10
INT. MOVING CAR-DAY
ADAM and RICK are driving down the freeway. Rick is
middle-aged, and Adam is an older teenager. He nervously
twists his hands around the wheel while Adam stares out the
window. The song "Jet Airliner" by Steve Miller Band comes
on the radio.
RICK
Oh nice! You hear that Adam? I
saw Steve Miller Band in concert
when I was your age. Me and my
friends got really drunk at the
concert too. It was wild, but I
bet you know all about wild times,
right my man?

Adam is silent for a beat and stares out the window.

ADAM
So you and my mom are getting
pretty serious, huh Rick?

RICK
Ohhh. Yeah, yes. Yes, we are. And I
told you, you don’t have to call me
Rick. You’ll be calling me Dad
soon, so if you could try that out.

ADAM
I don’t wanna do that, Rick.
RICK
Pop.

ADAM
I don’t wanna do that, Rick.
RICK
Dadman.

Adam goes back to being silent. The song on the radio

continues.
RICK
This song actually annoys me a
little bit, because before each
line he sings, you can hear him
inhale really deep. See?
Rick inhales with the music. He looks over at Adam, who is
staring out the window.

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 2.

ADAM
(Under his breath)
Inhales like all the guys my mom
has fucked other than you.
RICK
I heard that. And that is, rude.
ADAM
He’s only been dead for seven
months.
RICK
Listen, Adam, I know right now, I
am the guy who is sleeping with
your mom and replacing your
dad. And trust me, that is not the
guy that I dreamed of being. That
is, not the guy...
Rick goes back to inhaling, and his breath gets deeper and
deeper until he starts to hyperventilate and cry a little
bit.
ADAM
What the?

RICK
Nothing.
ADAM
Are you crying?

RICK
No, it’s part of the song.
ADAM
Stop crying Rick.

RICK
I just love your mom. I really
do. And I hate that I am this guy
to you. I am being such a step-dad
in the worst way.

ADAM
No you aren’t.
RICK
I am. Look, my hair is parted. I
don’t know why. I never part it
like this. It just seemed
appropriate.

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 3.

ADAM
C’mon.
RICK
My polo is tucked into my jeans but
I don’t do that ever! There is a
big barbecue sauce stain on the
edge of it and I had to cover it up
because it looked like blood near
my crotch and I can’t handle that!

ADAM
Rick, stop! You’re not a lame
step-dad. You went to a Steve
Miller Band Concert! Right?
RICK
You like Steve Miller Band?
ADAM
Not really.
RICK
I am such a lame step-dad!
ADAM
Maybe you are. But I can tell my
mom really likes you.

RICK
Yeah?
ADAM
Yeah. And I like that she likes
you.

RICK
Really?
ADAM
Really.
Adam stares out the window again for a beat as Rick composes
himself.
RICK
Do you mind if I call you son?
ADAM
Whatever, Rick.
BLACKOUT.

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 4.