Autobiographical Essay

As someone who isn’t used to showing affection, I believe there is always a moment for

that type of person to change their way of loving someone. Sadly, I had to learn the hard way. In

2015 I lost the one person that had been with me since day one, my grandpa. Not only did it

change my view on life and death, but it changed my whole family.

My grandpa was always the type of person to joke around and just be a happy person.

Sure, he complained about stuff that happened, but don’t we all? It’s what makes life so hard.

Back when I was little, my parents worked a lot and they were only at home during the night, so

I would go to my grandparent’s house after school and stay there the whole day. They basically

raised me and shaped my whole personality. I grew up with one of my cousins and my

grandparents, so we always had a good time. Looking back at all those fond memories, I can tell

I got my personality from him.

A few years before his death we found out he had lung cancer. He did smoke in the past

but had quit a long time ago and hadn’t touched a cigar in his life after that. As he was funny, he

was also very proud and would not admit if he was feeling ill. It is crazy to think about how

much pain he endured silently while we thought he was alright. One day, the pain was too

unbearable for him and had to speak up, but it was too late. The cancer had developed for too

long. By this time, I was about 12 years old, and I was forced to see my grandpa slowly turn into

someone I did not know.

How can a 12-year-old deal with the first loss of a loved one, and a very special one at

that? Who was going to teach me how to cope with a loss that big? My dad was never the type of

person to show emotions either and my mom didn’t know how to deal with something this big.
 I believe grievance is a long process, and it doesn’t necessarily have to be the same for

everyone. I can’t even say I am done grieving and I’m turning 20 this year. 7 years have gone by,

and I still have engraved in my brain the time I last saw him the day before he died. I didn’t get

to say goodbye, all he did was stare at me and all I could do was get away from that situation as

fast as I could, because I was 12 and I had no idea what to do.

That one 10 second moment is what took for me to immediately start reflecting on the

way I was showing affection and treating those around me. I learned that there’s no use in

thinking about what I could have or could not have done. I cannot shut down like that and then

regret it when it is too late, and that is why I have changed since then.

People often ask me why I decided to study biomedical engineering and what I hope to

achieve with it. I tend to give a very simple answer, and I say it is because I liked both

engineering and medicine, which is a half-truth. In fact, I would like to move on to the research

field and see what we can optimize about these medical devices used to combat cancerous cells,

but that is just a dream. Plus, the first answer makes me sound smarter.