Professional Documents
Culture Documents
This material comes from the manual: Managing Conflict with Confidence, Clare Heaton &
Maureen Lynch (Australia: Pearson Education Australia, 2003).
It is targeted at upper primary and lower secondary students (ages 10-15 approx).
It is based on Conflict Resolution Network's 12 skills of Conflict Resolution.
We are most grateful to them for their permission to use this extract here.
Bullying is different from ordinary teasing, rough-and-tumble or schoolyard fights. What makes
it different is that the incidents are ongoing, and there is usually an imbalance of size, strength
and power between the children involved.
The bully might have power not only because he or she is bigger and stronger, but also because
other children side with the bully often to protect themselves.
Research shows:
• Boys are more often bullied by a single individual; girls more often by groups. There is not
much difference between the number of boys and girls who suffer from bullying.
• The size of the school, or whether the school is single-sex or co-educational or government or
non-government, makes no significant difference to the amount of bullying that goes on.
• Children are most often bullied when they are in their first few years of primary school and
again in their first few years of secondary school.
Source: Pamphlet on Bullying: Information for Parents, Department of Education, Training and
Youth Affairs, March 2002. www.detya.gov.au/schools/publicat.htm
Source: K. Rigby, Bullying in Schools and What to do about It, Australian Council for
Educational Research, 19 Prospect Hill Road, Camberwell, Vic. 3124, 1996.
Bullying in cyberspace has emerged as a real and dangerous threat in today’s society.
When the definition of bullying is acknowledged, it becomes clear that bullying in all its forms is
unacceptable.
• have a broad understanding of bullying behaviour strategies to prepare them to respond in ways
that serve their best interests and empower then, and not antagonise the bully;
• be equipped with life skills to get along better with others;
• be aware of all aspects of bullying behaviour and understand the definition of bullying from
their discussion with their peers and data from current research;
• reflect on their reactions and responses and the reactions and responses of others, at which time
they may see their own tendency to bully and take responsibility for that as well as recognise
those behaviours in others, be less bothered by other people’s actions and know when and if they
are adding to a volatile situation;
• recognise, select and use the strategies that most meet their needs to deal with rejection and or
bullying, so they feel empowered and the bully is disempowered, as a result of experiencing
practical activities to gain self-acceptance;
• be empowered to deal with aggressive behaviour with confidence and discernment;
• feel more capable to communicate their needs to others to get what they want if they are doing
the bullying;
• perhaps be prepared to talk more openly about bullying and to report incidents.
The activities in the session offer support to both the bully and the bullied. It is the behaviour and
not the person that is unacceptable.
This session offers a comprehensive variety of strategies, so students will know that no one size
fits all. Such a range of strategies have been included to offer lots of choices to suit lots of people
in lots of different situations. All strategies cannot possibly be all things to all people. It is
suggested that students reflect on the strategy to decide if it could be helpful to them.
Some strategies are presented as ‘be prepared’. Students are encouraged to relax, imagine and
practise so as to prepare themselves. Some strategies may not be relevant right here and now but
may prove very helpful in later life.
There is no one prescriptive way of dealing with a bully. It depends on the person being bullied,
the bully and the situation.
Outcomes
(Note: not all of these outcomes will be achieved with this abbreviated lesson.)
Objective To have students think about and discuss twenty-two ways to deal with bullies. (It
is necessary to have completed previous core activities before doing this activity.)
Materials Twenty-two ways to deal with bullies. Download Bullying Activity sheet by
clicking here. Print out one per student or make an overhead transparency.
1. Get help.
•Ask for help.
•Call a help line.
2. Tell someone.
•Tell on them.
•Keep telling on them; it’s not dobbing.
•Tell your teacher or parents.
•Talk to someone.
•Call Kids Help Line.
•Tell the principal.
•Tell a parent.
•Run to a teacher.
3. Ignore them.
•Don’t react.
•Keep doing something else.
•Look away.
• Fold your arms and say nothing.
•Never let them know you’re upset.
•Try not to show you’re upset.
•Pretend you don’t care.
•Pretend you can’t see them or hear them.
5. Avoid them.
•Stay away from them.
•Avoid where they are.
•Don’t talk to them.
•Don’t go near them.
•Don’t play with them.
•Walk or run away.
9. Control yourself.
•Don’t get mad.
•Do something to calm down.
•Control your temper.
•Use self-control.
Talk like a broken CD (repeating what you will or won't do with the same words each time you
reply).
With the students, group strategies together that are similar. Write each strategy on a large card.
Discussion
•Would you need to use different strategies with different people and for different situations?
•When is it not a good time to deal with bullies?
Points to consider
•Don’t try to deal with bullies if they are drunk, on drugs, or in a fighting mood.
•Don’t try to deal with bullies if they are showing off in front of their friends.
In this or another session you might reinforce the skills by putting up the cards from the last
session and considering which strategies students might consider using in the following
situations:
•A bully says, `Give me your lunch money or don't try going home.
•A bully is calling you names.
•A crowd of tough-looking people are coming towards you.
•A bully is constantly pushing, shoving and hurting you.
•A bully is spreading rumours about you.
•A bully gets you alone and threatens you.
•A bully throws your things out of the school grounds.
•A bully won't let you in the toilet, or looks over the door.
Copied with permission from Managing Conflict with Confidence, Clare Heaton & Maureen
Lynch (Australia: Pearson Education Australia, 2003). Book format. You can purchase this
manual at: Pearson Australia or Relationships Australia Bookshop