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"I Want a Wife” Assignment Response

What characterizes gender and sexuality; is it gender roles, dynamics in superiority or

bodily autonomy? Judy Syfers raises these controversial questions regarding self and gender and

equality identity and equality. Published in the year 1970, the essay “I Want a Wife” confronts

the traditional misogynistic gender roles assigned to women by patriarchal ideals. This essay is a

war of words with people who enforce these patriarchal, outdated views: traditional women, and

men. Withall, it aims to empower middle-class women who feel trapped in the cycle of

unattainable standards and expectations placed on their shoulders. Syfers does so by using

parallelism, Ethos, satire, diction which enable her use of the husband's perspective; further

delivering the intended message.

Sexism and gender inequality in the era Syfers published 'I want a Wife' in, had started to

take a turn, considering that it was in the midst of the second wave of feminism- where

conversations about gender discrimination started taking place. Judy Syfers reflects her anger

through using Ethos to indicate that misogyny is overdue. "I belong to that classification of

people known as wives. I am A Wife. And, not altogether incidentally, I am a mother." Syfers

uses the word "classification" to refer to wives, as if they have a list of set skills and qualities.

The phrase: "I belong to that classification of people known as wives." further indicates that

women are nothing but a subsidiary of people (men) and are not equivalent to each other. Her

use of diction also adds to her intent, in which she capitalizes the words "A Wife", (hence

making them proper nouns) to dehumanize women. Additionally, her use of using wife as a

proper noun gives her the qualification to speak upon the matter; ethos. "And, not altogether

incidentally, I am a mother" Syfers strategically uses diction (more specifically: double entendre)
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to further amplify the roles and duties expected of women: motherhood, and babying/ taking care

of their husbands or even being care-takers in general.

“I Want a Wife” reflects many of the patriarchal views that society enforces. It is

demonstrated through the dynamic relationships presented in the speaker's marriage. Women

during that time had an inferior role in the marriage, women of course are expected to aid the

men in any shape or form. There is a clear superiority between women and men with the latter

clearly in control of the non-reciprocal relationship. Replaceable and Subservient are some of the

many unrealistic expectations placed on women. Syfer's use of satire perfectly emanates the

societal point of view. “I want a wife who understands that my sexual needs may entail more

than strict adherence to monogamy. I must, after all, be able to relate to people as fully as

possible.” Women are expected to meet men's sexual desires while being virgins and saints. Men

are capable of sleeping around and cheating. The Madonna-Whore Dichotomy (MWD) depicts

divided attitudes of women in general as either "good," chaste, and pure Madonnas or "bad,"

unfaithful, and seductive whores, according to the Madonna-Whore Complex. “If, by chance, I

find another person more suitable as a wife than the wife I already have, I want the liberty to

replace my present wife with another one.” Wives can easily be replaceable "The woman I

have," reiterating that women are nothing more than possessions that men own and replace

whenever he pleases.

"I Want a Wife" is an essay written by Judy Syfers that channels misogynistic and

outdated views regarding wives, by inserting herself in the husband's shoes. She uses several

techniques to deliver the intended message, such as: parallelism, diction, and satire. Syfer’s essay
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does not only empower unexpecting women reading the essay but also confronts women who

have internalized their misogyny, and men who benefit from it.