Expert Perspectives On Soft Skills 2019

EXPERT PERSPECTIVES ON
SOFT SKILLS
CONTENT
05 Introduction
CHAPTER 1: WHAT ARE THE SOFT SKILLS?

The Importance of Self-Awareness in Leadership
07
Sarah Gallo | Associate Editor | Training Industry, Inc.
In Defense of Conversation as a Hard Skill

10
Stacey Engle | President | Fierce Conversations
The Most Powerful Soft Skill in Your Toolbox Isn’t “Soft” at All: Training
13 Accountability Like a Hard Skill
Christa Martin | Senior Vice President of Marketing | Partners In Leadership
Not-so-soft Skills: The Language of Creativity, Collaboration and Power

17
Dr. Sven Hansen, MBCHB, MBA | Founder | The Resilience Institute
Why Companies Need to Invest in “Commercial People Skills” to Boost

21 Their Bottom Line
Nicole Soames | CEO | Diadem Performance
Communicating Through the Cracks

23
Rob Salafia | CEO/Senior Consultant | Protagonist Consulting Group/Wronski Associates
Don’t Take The Bait: 7 Strategies for Dealing with Toxic People
26
Loren Sanders | Senior Adviser of Learning and Communications | CVS Health
Coaching Time Management: The Underrated Tool for Sales Leaders

29
Justin Zappulla | Managing Partner | Janek Performance Group
Unclogging the Communication Channel

31
Julie Benezet | Leadership Consultant and Author
It All Starts With Noticing: Mindfulness and Soft Skills

35
Scott Rose | Vice President of Consulting Services | Impact International
3 “Soft Skills” that Are Actually Hard Skills

37
Rebecca Taylor | CEO | GoCoach
Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 2

Grab Your Boss’ Attention: 5 Tips for Communicating Up
40
Marie Verity | Partner Success Manager | Vital Learning
Can You Teach Motivation?

43
Susan Fowler | Author and Consultant
Empathy in Leadership: Creating a Culture of Understanding

47
CHAPTER 2: WHY DO SOFT SKILLS MATTER?

Why Soft Skills Are the Competitive Advantage of the 21st Century
51
Ben Taylor | Content Marketing Manager | Richardson
Hard Data Makes the Case for Soft Skills

54
Adam Medros | President and CEO | edX
Why We Should Start Calling Soft Skills “Employability Skills”

56
Dave Fogleman | CEO | SkillPath
Soft Skills — Not Technical Ones — Should Be the Focus of Upskilling Initiatives
60
Jeremy Auger | Chief Sales Officer | D2L
Playing Hard Ball With Soft Skills

63 Dr. Theresa R. Horne, CPTM | Leadership Training Program Manager | National Labor
Relations Board
Soft Skills: The Catalyst to Achieving Organization-wide Change

65
Joseph Grenny | Co-Founder | VitalSmarts
In Sales, Soft Skills Drive Customer Experience

68
Jeff Seeley | CEO | Carew International, Inc.
The Softest Skills Can Lead to the Hardest Business Numbers

70
Paul Leone, Ph.D. | Senior ROI Consultant | Verizon
CHAPTER 3: SOFT SKILLS TRAINING PRACTICES
Go Ahead — Forget Soft Skills

74
Diane Bock | Senior Consultant | DDI

Why Are Soft Skills So Hard?
77
Barb Opyt | Learning Solution Architect | Caveo Learning
There Is Nothing “Soft” About Developing Leadership Skills: A Coaching

80 Process That Works
Sam Shriver | Executive Vice President | The Center for Leadership Studies
Curating the Soft Skills: 4 Steps to Get Started

83
Michael J. Noble, Ph.D. | CEO and Chief Learning Strategist | TTA
3 Steps in Closing the Behavioral (Soft) Skills Gap

86 Ian Stewart | Executive Director of Learning and Design | Kaplan Leadership & Professional
Development
Coaching: Leading, One Person at a Time

89
Colonel (retired) Donna Brazil, Ph.D. | Faculty Member | Thayer Leader Development Group
5 Reasons to Take a Hands-On Approach to Soft Skills Training

92
Sue Wigston | CEO | Eagle’s Flight
CHAPTER 4: SOFT SKILLS IN A DIGITAL WORLD
Soft Skills Training: Trends in Digital Learning and Emerging Technologies

96
Danielle Hart | Director of Marketing | SweetRush
Are Soft Skills the Key to Future-proofing Your Leadership?

100
Dr. Alison Maitland | Director of Research and Product | Lane4
A Survivor’s Guide to Staying Relevant, Even as Technology

103 Revolutionizes Work
Rory Sisco | Solutions Manager | Mind Gym
VR: The Future of Soft Skills Training for Leaders

106
109 Additional Training Industry Resources

INTRODUCTION
WHAT ARE SOFT SKILLS, WHY ARE THEY IMPORTANT … AND ARE
THEY REALLY “SOFT”?
Soft skills are the behavioral competencies and personality traits that help us
interact and form relationships with each other. Also known as interpersonal skills,
they include communication, language, empathy, self-awareness and teamwork.
They are called “soft skills” to distinguish them from “hard skills,” which relate to
the ability to perform elements of a particular job or a set of specific tasks.
However, many people believe that due to the importance of soft skills, which is
arguably growing in the face of automation, their name is, perhaps, a misnomer.
Many suggest terms like “career skills” or that we should eliminate the distinction
altogether. After all, the ability to relate well with others is critical across
industries, job functions and demographics.
Regardless of what we call them, soft skills are an important part of any
corporate training program. The best way to teach them is debatable; coaching,
instructor-led training, e-learning and even virtual reality are all methods in use at
organizations large and small. In fact, as with many topics, the best way to train
employees in soft skills may be a blend of modalities. This e-book explores the
perspectives of soft skills training experts: their insights into what soft skills are,
who needs to learn them and the best ways to impart them. Using these tips and
strategies in your organization will enable you to develop employees at all levels
who understand themselves and others and collaborate successfully as a result.
As always, I would love to hear your perspective on this collection of articles from
TrainingIndustry.com’s community.
Ken Taylor
President, Training Industry, Inc.

CHAPTER 1
WHAT ARE SOFT SKILLS?

THE IMPORTANCE OF SELF-AWARENESS IN LEADERSHIP
Sarah Gallo is the associate editor at Training Industry, Inc.
From gaining the deep respect of team members to consistently delivering

measurable business results, effective leadership — across industries — consists of a
myriad of characteristics, strategies and skills. However, one trait proves universal in
leaders of all kinds: self-awareness.
WHAT IS SELF-AWARENESS?
Merriam-Webster defines self-awareness as “an awareness of one’s own personality
or individuality,” but developing this attribute is harder than it seems from that
definition. Cam Caldwell, Ph.D., an author and professor at the University of Illinois
at Springfield, says, “Self-awareness is an effort. It’s a conscious effort to invest in
understanding who we are, who others are, our universal rules that [we] apply in life
and our commitment to the future.” For leaders struggling to develop self-awareness,
Caldwell advises, “It takes work and willingness to recognize that reality is truth.”
Self-awareness is one of the key elements of emotional intelligence (EI), a term

coined by psychologist Michael Beldoch and widely popularized by Daniel Goleman
that refers to a person’s ability to identify and manage their emotions and identify
and influence others’ emotions. Often, developing self-awareness as a leader is also
the first step in developing EI — which has proven particularly valuable in leadership.
An article by keynote speaker and author Brent Gleeson highlights the importance of
EI in leaders: “The ability to be perceptively in tune with yourself and your emotions,
as well as having sound situational awareness can be a powerful tool for leading a
team.” So, not only does self-awareness work to make leaders more cognizant of
their actions, emotions and biases — it helps them develop greater EI in the process.
“Self-aware leaders are constantly looking to improve.”
Developing self-awareness as a leader will strengthen not only individual

performance but organizational performance as well. Ultimately, the immense
amount of understanding, trustworthiness and wisdom that self-aware leaders
possess equips them with critical skills for success.
“We’re committed to becoming excellent because we’re committed to the moral

obligation we have to care about others…[and] to make a better world,” Caldwell says
of self-aware leaders. “We sense this moral requirement that is part of humility that
engages us and motivates us to invest in not only ourselves but in others and their
opportunity to improve.”
CHARACTERISTICS OF SELF-AWARE LEADERS

Caldwell credits humility as one of the most important character traits associated
with self-aware leaders. “Humility is a correct understanding of oneself, and that
correct understanding leads to a better understanding of others — because once we
love ourselves, we better learn to appreciate others as well.”
Gustavo Razzetti, author of “Stretch for Change” and “Stretch Your Mind” and CEO of
Liberationist, a change leadership company, also notes the importance of developing
humility as a leader. He says that “intellectual humility,” which is “knowing that you
don’t know everything — first about yourself, second about others and, then, about
the world,” is another trait self-aware leaders should strive to develop. Although
practicing humility in the workplace does require a certain amount of vulnerability,
which can be anxiety-inducing, it helps create an environment where everyone feels
comfortable acknowledging his or her flaws and asking for help.
In addition to being humble, self-aware leaders are constantly looking to improve.

They recognize their own strengths, weaknesses and hidden biases and take
accountability for them, and they consistently ask for feedback in order to improve.
Whether by requesting 360-degree feedback from team members on a regular basis
or investing in a continuing professional development program, self-aware leaders
recognize the value of continuous learning and growth. Razzetti shares, “Self-aware
leaders, because they’re more humble, know that they are not perfect. So, not only
are they open to feedback, but they’re constantly asking, ‘What can I do better?’”
Another way leaders can work to become more self-aware is by making a conscious
effort to forgive. “Truly wise leaders are very willing to forgive,” Caldwell says. “They
forgive themselves; they recognize that we don’t live in a world that’s perfect. They
know that no one’s perfect.”
ORGANIZATIONAL BENEFITS OF SELF-AWARE LEADERSHIP

By becoming more self-aware, and subsequently recognizing their strengths,
weaknesses and hidden biases, leaders gain the trust of their team members — and
increase their own credibility. Additionally, a culture of self-awareness advances
learning and development (L&D) by promoting the value of continuous growth and

development. Razzetti says, “When people are self-aware, they can put their tensions
on the table, and no one gets hurt, because we’re trying to improve. So, we have this
culture of continuous improvement, and we don’t take things personally.”
L&D professionals should encourage leaders to use 360-degree feedback surveys,

regular check-ins with team members and self-reflection to help them become more
self-aware. In fact, in an interview with the University of Southern California’s Sol
Price School of Public Policy, David Geveorkyan (district manager of the Los Angeles
County Economic Development Corporation) credits self-reflection as pivotal in
helping him gain self-awareness as a leader: “Through the self-reflection process,
you get to dive deep within your inner world and subconscious mind. You are able
to better evaluate who you are as an individual and how you interact with the
environment that you’ve placed yourself in.”
In addition to helping leaders develop professionally, self-awareness also helps them

have a positive impact on the business. For one, teams led by self-aware leaders
are less likely to experience internal conflict. “In the end, a culture of self-awareness
creates a space where people can address their tensions in a more open and less
friction-based way,” Razzetti says.
Additionally, a study by Korn Ferry Institute directly connected self-aware leaders to

business results, finding that “leaders who are self-aware are more likely to be high-
performing, to meet their business goals, and save on turnover costs.”
STRIVING FOR MORE

Self-aware leaders strive for more than individual success. They want to use their
expertise and passion to enact change on a large scale. In order to make a lasting
difference, however, leaders must first use their sense of self-awareness to objectively
determine areas they need to improve. “We have to have that clarity about what is
and what is not true and be willing to embrace it and accept it and look at it as a
resource to make our lives greater, and make the world greater — which, again, is our
whole responsibility [as self-aware leaders],” Caldwell notes.
At its core, self-awareness offers leaders far more than another tool for success.
It helps them remember why they wanted to become leaders in the first place. It
helps them discover, and live, the impact they want to have, not just on their team
members — or even on their organizations — but on the world. And, that is a leader
worth following.
Customize your free subscription to receive related content.

IN DEFENSE OF CONVERSATION AS A HARD SKILL
Stacey Engle, president of Fierce Conversations, is focused on helping clients learn how to have
highly effective conversations and, in turn, transform their organizations and their lives, one
conversation at a time. She is a passionate self-starter with over 10 years’ experience helping to
build businesses through smart go-to-market and innovative people strategies.
When it comes to breaking down employee skills, we tend to divide them into two
categories: hard skills and soft skills. Hard skills are things that you might learn in
school or through on-the-job training, and they are quantifiable – you either have
the skill at some level of proficiency, or you don’t. The beautiful thing about hard
skills is that you can learn new ones at any time. Plus, once you learn a hard skill, it’s
transferable, meaning that you can take it wherever your career takes you.
Traditionally, communication has been considered a soft skill that doesn’t require
formal training. Organizations tend to believe that the ability to communicate
is inherent – people will either succeed at communicating or bumble through
conversations the best they can. But is this the best approach? By viewing
communication as a soft skill, businesses are failing to fully reap the benefits that
come from successful communication and significantly underestimating the pitfalls
that occur when it is lacking.
How an organization approaches conversation skills can have a significant impact

on its company culture and bottom line. At the end of the day (or fiscal year),
conversations are at the heart of everything we do, from working well as a team
to ensuring every employee understands and embraces a company’s goals.
Conversations determine what will or won’t happen in an organization.
It’s that simple, and it begs the question, is communication really something
organizations should not try harder to improve? Much of the time, leaders fail to
realize that ineffective and missing conversations tend to be the root cause of some
of today’s biggest business problems. In fact, more than 70% of employees say a
lack of candor within their workplace impacts their organization’s ability to perform
optimally, according to Fierce research.
Here are just a few examples:
EMPLOYEE TURNOVER
Josh Bersin of Deloitte explains that each time we lose an employee, the replacement
cost ranges “from tens of thousands of dollars to 1.5–2.0X annual salary,” depending

on the role. Even for small and medium-sized businesses, decreasing employee churn
is an attractive way to save costs.
EMPLOYEE ENGAGEMENT
Transparency and trust go hand in hand, and they start with effective
communication. If either declines, the erosion of employee engagement is not far
behind. A recent Edelman Trust Barometer report found just 17% of employees trust
their manager to tell the truth.
WORKFORCE PRODUCTIVITY
The Energy Project found that a startling 50% of employees lack a level of meaning
and significance at work. This problem is exacerbated by poor levels of employee
engagement, which cost U.S. companies a shocking $450 to $550 billion per year,
according to Gallup’s 2014 “State of the American Workplace” report.
Where there is a lack of strong communication, these symptoms become greater and
greater. The truth is, however, that all employees can improve their conversation skills,
to the benefit of not only their organization but to themselves, personally. By shifting
to the belief that communication skills are hard, not soft, skills, every company can
see improvements in their employees and, ultimately, in their bottom line.
Need more proof? There are some key reasons viewing conversations as a hard skill
is paramount:
“Ineffective and missing conversations tend to be the root cause of some

of today’s biggest business problems.”
COMMUNICATION IS A GENERALLY ACCEPTED BUSINESS-CRITICAL SKILL

How often do you see on someone’s resume that he or she is a good communicator?
Do you consider it one of your top strengths? While there isn’t a globally accepted
way to measure the effectiveness of someone’s communication expertise, we know
this skill is in high demand.
Yet, most of us fall short. According to recent Fierce research, nearly 81% of people
said that ineffective communication occurs in their organization, but 50% of those
individuals said the miscommunication isn’t related to them. In fact, the majority of

workers recognize that communication problems exist within their workplaces, but
they don’t think they’re the problem.
IN A MULTIGENERATIONAL WORKFORCE, FOSTERING A SHARED VOCABULARY

DRIVES PERFORMANCE
Bloomberg estimates that this year, Generation Z (those born after 1996) will surpass
millennials as the largest age group, at over 30% of the population. By 2021, Gartner
research predicts that one in five corporate employees will be from this generation.
Each generation in the workforce has a preference for certain communication styles
and channels. Couple these differences with an interconnected workforce, and it
spells communication trouble – unless you develop a shared language through
training.
CONVERSATIONS ARE AT THE HEART OF EVERYTHING WE DO

You can rarely accomplish any aspect of work without having some kind of
conversation. Conversations are at the center of everything we do, so they can either
make or break our success.
By viewing conversation skills as something that employees can learn and improve
upon, organizations see a boost in productivity, increases in talent retention,
improved employee engagement and so much more.

THE MOST POWERFUL SOFT SKILL IN YOUR TOOLBOX ISN’T “SOFT”
AT ALL: TRAINING ACCOUNTABILITY LIKE A HARD SKILL
Christa Martin is an author and experienced keynote speaker, board member, marketer and STEM
adviser with a passion for consumer behavior. She is the senior vice president of marketing at
Partners In Leadership, a southern California-based provider of Accountability Training® and
management consulting firm.
Effective interpersonal communication, creative problem-solving, a teamwork-

oriented mentality, the ability to learn quickly and adapt to changing circumstances
… These are among the most critical soft skills that professionals – and organizations
at large – must master to succeed in marketplaces when consumer expectations are
higher than ever and the next major disruption is always just around the corner.
Coined by the U.S. military in the 1970s, today, the term “soft skills” is typically used
to refer to a broad range of social and communication skills as well as a host of
personality traits, behaviors and non-technical competencies. A strong set of soft
skills enables an individual to collaborate effectively, navigate social landscapes
adeptly and perform well in complex professional situations. When combined
with “hard skills” – or measurable, teachable abilities – soft skills can drive greater
individual and organizational achievement.
RETHINKING ACCOUNTABILITY AS A SOFT SKILL

In business, accountability is among the most widely championed soft skills, with
workplace development experts and corporate leaders alike urging employees
to “take accountability” for their role in contributing to underperformance.
Unfortunately, not only is this advice rooted in a fundamental misunderstanding of
accountability as necessarily punitive and retroactive, but it also mischaracterizes
accountability as a soft skill – as something that is amorphous, unquantifiable and
unteachable.
Further, unlike many soft skills, accountability has been shown to have a statistically
significant impact on business outcomes. According to research published in the
Journal of Applied Psychology, a high level of shared accountability in the workplace
is a necessary condition of translating the empowerment of employees into improved
organizational performance.
As such, accountability is not, strictly speaking, a soft skill. Rather, as defined in the
New York Times bestseller “The Oz Principle,” accountability is a “personal choice
to rise above one’s circumstances and demonstrate the ownership necessary for

The Most Powerful Soft Skill in Your Toolbox Isn’t “Soft” at All: Training Accountability Like a Hard Skill
achieving desired results.” When leaders recognize this choice as something that is
teachable and measurable – i.e., a hard skill – they can wield its power to achieve a
slew of top-line business goals.
ARTICULATING DESIRED RESULTS LAYS THE GROUNDWORK FOR TEACHING

ACCOUNTABILITY
More often than not, leaders either fail to identify and communicate organizational
goals or put forth a laundry list of priorities so complex that they’re impossible for
employees to grasp, let alone remember. In fact, Partners in Leadership’s “Workplace
Accountability Study” – which surveyed over 40,000 professionals – found that a
mere 15% of workplace leaders clearly define their top-line organizational goals.
When employees lack a set of specific, accessible targets, engagement and

productivity are often replaced by finger-pointing and excuse-making. However,
when leaders purposefully define three to five meaningful, memorable and
measurable desired results – and proactively communicate them to employees at
every level of an organization – they pave a clear path toward collective progress.
As leaders continuously refine these goals, they’re simultaneously building a
progressively sturdier framework within which employees can understand and
practice accountability.
“Accountability is teachable and measurable – i.e., a hard skill.”
Articulating desired results is, therefore, the first step in teaching accountability as a
hard skill. Teaching accountability requires leaders to provide a formalized structure
in which all employees are encouraged to practice accountability in their daily work.
Such a structure helps them master accountability by consistently and confidently
following four critical steps:
1. Seeing performance gaps that are hampering progress toward organizational

goals.
2. Owning those gaps and the solutions needed to close them.
3. Solving performance problems through creative troubleshooting.
4. Doing what they have promised to do by executing on organizational goals.
This road map for practicing accountability combats finger-pointing, low levels of

engagement and internal silos by empowering each employee to cross strict role
boundaries when necessary and to develop innovative solutions that benefit the
organization as a whole. When individuals or, better yet, entire teams follow this map,
they propel their organization toward – and often beyond – its top-line goals.
Savvy practitioners of accountability understand that the skill can be taught through
a proven methodology. After establishing a focus around top-line goals, it is the
complete psychological ownership and commitment to proactive problem-solving
that effectively eliminate the behaviors undermining organizational success.
“Articulating desired results is the first step in teaching accountability as

a hard skill.”
MEASURING ACCOUNTABILITY IN YOUR WORKFORCE

Measurability is an essential component of any hard skill. Even when leaders
recognize accountability as both teachable and formulaic, they are often hesitant
to categorize it as a hard skill, because they do not believe they can measure it
accurately. However, this belief is misinformed: Accountability can and should be
measured.
One way leaders can gauge approximate rates of accountability within their
organization is by measuring progress toward desired results (which, as stated,
should be measurable themselves). For instance, if a leader finds that one of their
key performance indicators is 10% below where it should be to guarantee the desired
annual revenue growth, they can dig deeper to uncover how a lack of accountability
may be contributing to the problem.
To achieve a more precise measurement of organizational performance, leaders

should use a tool that incorporates three concepts: whether your workforce is
accountable, the impact that accountability has on the business and a solution for
fixing the gaps. Accountability typically includes seeking feedback, psychological
ownership, creative problem-solving and effective actions. These four critical
organizational performance factors tie into the organization’s ability to grow, speed
to market, ability to deal with change, achievement and engagement.
Once an organization can measure these key critical components of driving growth,
the key to success is an action plan for solving gaps within the organization itself.

For example, your L&D team might see that for the statement, “You are comfortable
asking for feedback from others,” the average employee score is 4.5 out of 7. You
could then home in on the breakdown of this score distribution and discover that
a large percentage of employees feel highly uncomfortable seeking feedback.
Finally, you could tackle this problem with an informed understanding of why some
employees feel this way – perhaps they don’t feel valued at work or included in team
decision-making – and then implement training on the leader and employee level to
fix this gap. This “measure, analyze, fix the gap” training approach is key to corporate
agility – which can be learned.
“Fostering greater accountability within an organization accelerates and

optimizes its ability to deliver results.”
In viewing accountability as something that is learned and honed through practice

— with specific indicators of mastery and a system for quantification — leaders
benefit from the realization that accountability is a hard skill with measurable, value-
adding potential. Ultimately, fostering greater accountability within an organization
accelerates and optimizes its ability to deliver on crucial top-line results.

NOT-SO-SOFT SKILLS: THE LANGUAGE OF CREATIVITY,
COLLABORATION AND POWER
Dr. Sven Hansen, MBCHB, MBA, founded The Resilience Institute in 2002. He has worked
internationally with professional firms, banks, corporations, government institutions,
entrepreneurs, education organizations and high-performance sport athletes, and he is an
experienced executive coach, keynote speaker and leadership trainer.
For most of our time on earth, we were hunters and gatherers. At first glance, those
activities seem concrete or hard – navigation, gathering nutritious food, killing
animals, cooking and protecting family members. If we look deeper, however, soft
skills – self-awareness, patience, impulse control, empathy, altruism and collaboration
– have always been the key to our survival and success.
The dominance of soft skills began before humans. According to Sir David
Attenborough’s BBC documentary series “Dynasties,” lions, whales, tigers,
chimpanzees and others show the same pattern. The young that survive and thrive
have mothers and fathers who understood and used soft skills. Rather than survival
of the fittest, in many mammals, it is survival of the soft-skilled. For humans, soft skills
define success.
Globally respected biology experts such as Edward O. Wilson (“The Social Conquest
of Earth”), Frans de Waal (“The Age of Empathy”), and even Charles Darwin (“The
Expression of Emotion in Man and Animals”) clearly articulated how soft skills define
social and survival success. In the 1990s, Daniel Goleman and other researchers
showed us that emotional intelligence, or EQ, is at least twice as important as IQ and
technical skill (hard skills) and, in fact, 85% of outstanding leadership is attributable
to EQ. In 2018, Noah Yuval Harari’s book “21 Lessons for the 21st Century” introduced
“the age of the useless class” and the imperative to accelerate soft skill development
if we are to thrive in the digital future.
If you have mastered technical, or “hard,” skills, you know this truth; in fact, you
probably spend most of your personal and leadership development resources on soft
skills. If you are interested in your success and the success of your learners and your
employees, you need the language and a personal plan to grow your soft skills.
WHAT ARE SOFT SKILLS?

Using the right framework and language is essential. Think about your skill
development within the following framework:

Skill Competence Example Situation Example

Category
Posture and presence Walking into a meeting
Physical
Managing lifestyle/well-being Exercise, sleep and nutrition
Emotional awareness Recognizing states and feelings

Emotional Impulse control Restraining destructive emotions
Empathy Accurately reading others
Focus and presence Being fully attentive

Cognitive Situation agility and creativity Thinking through best options
Compassion and altruism Considering how to support others
Digital literacy and competence Working with data and AI

Technical
Business process skills Mastering your role
Physical, emotional and cognitive experience are tightly linked from body up and
mind down. Inevitably, when we are disturbed by emotions – particularly anger,
sadness, fear or craving – they damage our technical skill deployment as well. We
need four perspectives to make sense of these interdependent skill sets: insight,
mastery, empathy and influence.
Insight is the ability to identify, name and own our physical, emotional and cognitive
experience. The most important starting command for a leader is to check your body,
check your emotions and check your thoughts. Without these checks, we have no
reference point to manage ourselves in fluid interactions. When we discover and own
our posture and facial expressions, emotions and thoughts, our meta-cognition, or
conscious leadership, begins to flourish. We are going through an enormous societal
transformation as people become more self-aware. Don’t get left behind.
Mastery is the ability to make rapid, skillful adjustments to your body, emotions and
thoughts. We communicate executive presence to others in less than a second. Stand
and sit so you’re upright, but relaxed and open. When you feel like interrupting or
shouting, restrain yourself, exhale and express yourself with firm respect. If you find
yourself worrying, stop. If you are thinking pessimistically, use the creative discipline
of looking for solutions.
Empathy is the ability to read others accurately and rapidly. Physical empathy allows
us to be present and attuned to others’ physical signals. Emotional empathy allows

us to read and recognize emotions. Cognitive empathy – or perspective-taking –

allows us to imagine what others are thinking. Like insight, empathy is a reflective
awareness. We do not have to take action – simply read and understand clearly.
Influence is the social skill of aligning and liberating the efforts of others. Threat or
force is not sustainable in today’s world. It will invoke rebellion. Influence requires
connection, networks, communication, collaboration, teams and vision. It is not
possible without the integrated contribution of insight, mastery and empathy.
The key message here is that all of these personal and interpersonal skills can be
learned. First, make sense of them. Then, explore how they might benefit you.
Evaluate your current performance, define an area of improvement, and then drill it
over and over until it becomes part of who you are.
HOW TO BUILD YOUR SOFT SKILLS

Let’s start with a simple example: When you come home in the evening, you
inevitably end up in a shouting match with your teenager. She becomes upset,
and you become angry and withdraw. The family is anxious. You believe that your
relationship with your teenager is falling apart and that you are failing as a parent.
This is a classic soft skills blind spot. Step one is insight: How are you presenting,
what are you feeling and what are you thinking? Recording a video of the event is
the most powerful way to gain this insight. Reflecting honestly with another person
is another way. Self-reflection is the third. Ask how your body might present, in this
case, at the door to your child’s bedroom. Do you seem controlling? Judgmental?
Angry? What are you feeling? What are you thinking?
“Physical, emotional and cognitive experience are tightly linked from

body up and mind down.”
When you see how you are a part of the drama, you are ready for mastery. Perhaps
you could listen to a funny podcast on the way home; enter the house with enthusiastic
and grateful greetings; avoid the bedroom; put on relaxed clothes; yell out warmly,
“How are you? Come and say hi when you are ready!” Remind yourself how happy
you are to be home, how much you love your family and that your child is a normal
teenager. Be present, interested and caring. Ask if there is anything you can help her
with; now, you have progressed to empathy. Once you have succeeded for a month,

extend the conversation into agreeing on some standards, with clear consequences.
Remember, one careless explosion can ruin months of good relationship-building.
The same holds for work. Let’s say you have an L&D team meeting coming up.
Practice with a colleague, and record the practice on video. Notice your posture,
facial expressions and breathing, and correlate them with your experience. That’s
insight. Now, build the better version of yourself: Sleep well, dress well, stand tall and
move with energy. Cultivate positive emotion, and maintain optimistic thinking. That’s
mastery. It will take multiple adjustments.
When you start the team meeting, connect with your team members first. Make
checking in with each person the first agenda item. Listen with your body, your heart
and your mind. Be present. Demonstrate how pleased you are to be with them and
that you want this meeting to be successful for them. That’s empathy. Now, you are
ready to influence the team.
“Soft skills are the personal and interpersonal behaviors that cultivate
individual and team success.”
In summary, soft skills are the personal and interpersonal behaviors that cultivate
individual and team success. It is only recently that we have come up with a language
to make sense of them. We have a way to go, but we are making progress. As
you succeed, you will become healthier, happier and more successful, and difficult
relationships will become more enjoyable and engaging.
Remember:
1. Check body, check emotion, check mind.
2. Adjust body, adjust emotion, adjust mind.
3. Read bodies, read emotions, read minds.
4. Lead bodies, lead emotions, lead minds.
5. Now, go out and practice!

WHY COMPANIES NEED TO INVEST IN “COMMERCIAL PEOPLE
SKILLS” TO BOOST THEIR BOTTOM LINE
Nicole Soames is CEO of Diadem Performance, a leading commercial skills training and coaching
company, and author of “The Influence Book” and “The Negotiation Book.” Her third book, “The
Coaching Book,” will be published in October 2019. Follow Nicole on Twitter @nicoleSAuthor and
@diademperform.
With an increasing number of organizations experiencing slower-than-expected

growth, greater pressure on resources and margins, and a silo mentality and less-
than-ideal ways of working, it is more important than ever to invest in “commercial
people skills” training in order to boost their commercial performance and fuel their
bottom line.
Too often, companies limit their commercial skills training to employees in external-
facing roles, such as the sales function. However, as Daniel H. Pink wrote in his book
“To Sell is Human,” “Like it or not, we’re all in sales now.”
In other words, whatever our job title, we are all responsible for influencing and
persuading others. In fact, organizations that ignore the importance of influencing
internal stakeholders as well as their external customers do so at their own peril.
With research (see “The EQ Edge: Emotional Intelligence and Your Success” by
Steven J. Stein and Howard E. Book) showing that up to 45% of job success is
due to emotional intelligence (EQ) — the ability to recognize and manage your
own emotions and those of others — the message is clear: If companies want to
deliver their commercial aspirations, they need to take practical steps to help their
employees hone their commercial EQ skills so they can improve their performance.
ADOPTING AN EMOTIONALLY INTELLIGENT APPROACH TO TRAINING

People generally don’t know what they don’t know because of gaps in their
knowledge, unconscious biases that shape their decision-making or blind spots that
prevent them from achieving their full potential. It is, therefore, the responsibility of
HR and L&D professionals to identify and prioritize the employees throughout the
organization who would most benefit from developing their commercial people skills.
When it comes to choosing the best training approach, it’s important to bear in
mind there is no one-size-fits-all method. In fact, off-the-shelf training rarely works.
Companies need to adopt a tailored approach to training if they want to inspire their
employees to go the extra mile. This approach means hiring authentic trainers who
have experience with the particular challenges the learners are facing. The focus

Why Companies Need to Invest in “Commercial People Skills” to Boost Their Bottom Line
should be less on what they need to do and more on how they do it.
Remember, these so-called “soft” skills are often the hardest to learn. Changing
behavior doesn’t happen overnight. It takes ambition, commitment and hard work.
The key to helping employees change their behavior is to make it easy, rewarding and
normal to do so. Make sure you give employees practical tools and techniques, create
momentum for change by recognizing and rewarding their progress, and make the
changes a habit by helping them weave the behaviors into their everyday life.
“The key to helping employees change their behavior is to make it easy,

rewarding and normal to do so.”
Coaching is a powerful tool to help employees embed their learning. When

appropriate, hire an external coach to support them on their journey, or empower
their managers to give them one-on-one coaching to focus on their personal
development and encourage them to reach their goals.
THE BENEFITS OF COMMERCIAL PEOPLE SKILLS TRAINING

By adopting an emotionally intelligent approach to training in this way, companies
will reap the rewards of a more engaged and motivated workforce that is able
to build strong, balanced relationships both externally and internally. Remember,
people like doing business with people they like, whether they’re a customer,
supplier, colleague or boss. By equipping employees to have confident commercial
conversations with all of their stakeholders, companies will benefit from greater
creativity and collaboration that will, in turn, boost their bottom line.

COMMUNICATING THROUGH THE CRACKS
Rob Salafia is the author of the new book “Leading from Your Best Self: Develop Executive Poise,
Presence, and Influence to Maximize Your Potential” (McGraw-Hill), on which this article is based. He
is a lecturer at MIT Sloan School of Management, an MIT Leadership Center master executive coach,
CEO of Protagonist Consulting Group and a senior consultant at Wronski Associates.
Does it seem sometimes like you are shouting your ideas from the bottom of a well,
and no one is listening or even cares? Are you afraid to offer an alternate opinion or
point of view because of the fear of being demeaned or ostracized? Do you find the
voice in your head saying, “I think I’ve got the perfect solution for our problem, but
suggesting it is just not worth it”?
Our co-workers, our projects and our organizations benefit when we speak our
minds, reasonably disagree and candidly share ideas. But freeing our voices can be a
tall order, particularly if we’re working in an office environment where being open is
politically risky. The easy answer is to decide to leave, but sometimes, that is easier
said than done.
Picture this: You are a first-time people leader surrounded by direct reports who are
older and more experienced than you. Moreover, the workplace culture is such that
the leader does all the talking, while you and your team members remain invisible.
These are the unwritten rules.
This situation is the place one of my coaching clients found herself in early in her
career. Her mission was to take the reins of a small sales and marketing group of five
people, all located in one office. This group had been working together for over 10
years, yet several of them had not so much as spoken to each other for most of that
time. She took it upon herself to uncover the backstory.
What she found was a history of bad management, resulting in favoritism, a lack of
goals and expectations, and a destructive cycle of blame and judgment. While she
wasn’t in a position to take on the whole company, she decided to fight in her own
corner to improve the work culture that most directly impacted her team. She began
working with the group to identify all underlying issues, create a joint revenue project
between sales and marketing, and set expectations for both behavior and results.
Under this plan, her team started working more closely, and the project began to
produce results. Though she proved to be a terrific team leader over the next two
years, her efforts went unacknowledged by upper management, and her good

culture work didn’t ripple out beyond her team; she still struggled to express herself
to her boss.
She became frustrated and decided it might be time to leave the company. However,
because she did not want to forfeit her bonus, she took out her calendar and drew
an “X” on the date when she could leave and still be compensated. With this date in
mind, she made a promise to herself that she would not hold back her thoughts and
opinions in front of her boss any longer.
Because she released herself from the fear of reprisal, she began asking more
questions and sharing alternate points of view. Then, something amazing happened.
Others began to sit up, listen and pay attention. They, too, felt strengthened by her
newfound boldness.
“Small actions that push against preconceptions can make a big impact
on our personal contribution and our team’s performance.”
After only a couple of months, senior management recognized the positive impact
she was having on her peers and team members and finally acknowledged her for
her efforts. Because of the momentum she created, she barely noticed the “X” that
she had put on her calendar, and she stayed with the company for several more
years.
Imagine you could speak up at work without fear of reprisal. What issues would you
raise? What opinions would you offer? Try writing some of them down at home.
Fleshing out ideas on paper can help you build a stronger case and might give you
the courage you need to offer them.
Of course, for many of us, it’s neither practical nor realistic to say whatever is on our
minds without considering the consequences. But small actions that push against
preconceptions can make a big impact on our personal contribution and our team’s
performance.
Not ready to fully embrace a “nothing to lose” attitude just yet? Here are a few ideas
for how you can practice freeing your voice and develop the courage to speak up
during group conversations:

• Leverage your point of view, particularly if your experience or knowledge brings

something different to the table. Being known for having a point of view can
make you a valuable resource. Helping the team consider an alternative opinion
can often make the difference and eliminate costly mistakes.
• Build upon someone else’s idea. Have you ever been ready to share an idea at a
meeting, only to have a colleague speak up before you with a similar thought?
Just because someone beats you to the punch doesn’t mean you can’t still
add something valuable to the conversation. Rather than shrinking back, lean
forward, acknowledge this person, and help him or her build on the idea (e.g.,
noting the idea’s worthiness, by digging deeper and asking questions, etc.).
• Call for a pause in the action. During team discussions, ideas might be flying,
and it can be hard to speak up (moreover, certain ideas might be glossed over).
Taking a moment to share an observation about a comment that was glossed
over or a conversation that has gone off track can bring sharper awareness to
the team and keep the conversation on point.
“Leadership is the ability to speak up and create an environment that

values difference and alternate points of view.”
If you are the leader of a group:

• What can you do to create an environment where everyone’s voice is valued?
• In what ways could you encourage alternate points of view?
• How can you do less talking and more asking questions?
The world is spinning faster than ever, and it is neither productive nor sustainable
to think that all the answers reside in just one person. Leadership is not a position
but the ability to speak up when needed, give others the opportunity to contribute,
and create an environment that values difference and alternate points of view – all in
service of achieving and surpassing organizational goals.

DON’T TAKE THE BAIT: 7 STRATEGIES FOR DEALING WITH
TOXIC PEOPLE
Loren Sanders is a senior adviser of learning and communications on the strategy team at CVS
Health. She is also an adjunct faculty member at Lake Forest Graduate School of Management,
where she teaches organizational communications and strategic talent management.
I was facilitating a course recently when one of the participants pulled me aside and
said, “My wife is the director of training for [a company that shall not be named], and
she told me to take notes on the things you do to facilitate this course so she can
critique it later.”
I can’t remember exactly what I said, but it was something along the lines of, “I
certainly hope you will share any feedback with me as well; each of us has room for
improvement.” He continued to heckle and push me throughout the course, and I
worked to stay ahead of the game by bringing him into the conversation before he
could attempt further control.
This person, who had no connection to me or the organization I work for, could
have rattled me. He didn’t, because I chose not to let him. I walked away thinking
the whole exchange was strange and was reminded that some people enjoy rattling
others. There are people like him everywhere; usually, they are unaware that their
actions and comments have this impact on others.
“Unless we equip employees to effectively handle stressful situations with

toxic people, the impact can spread through an organization like a virus.”
It’s odd that in this day and age, when we discuss mental health so openly, we miss
discussion of the impact of long-term stress when dealing with toxic people.
Long-term stress impacts performance. Unless we equip employees to effectively

handle stressful situations with toxic people, the impact can spread through an
organization like a virus. It might be a character disorder, gaslighting, bullying or
another symptom, and it can show up in a boss, a co-worker or a frenemy.
We teach learners about emotional intelligence and how to remain calm and in control. We
wax philosophical about controlling what you can and letting go of what you can’t. This advice
is good, but without tips on how to deal with toxic people, it’s hard to put it into practice.

In a 2016 survey by McKinsey and Company, 62% of respondents said they were
treated rudely at work that year – an increase of 13 percentage points from 1998.
How can we arm the L&D community to deal with toxic people and, in turn, pass this
knowledge along to their learners? Here are some tips.
1. YOUR REACTION MATTERS

Know your boundaries, and set them up front. Be assertive about what you can
and cannot do. If the toxic person at your office focuses on negativity and plays the
victim, they are looking for allies. Don’t take the bait. If you are the type of person
who feels like you have to help, try asking, “What part did you play in that outcome?”
This question will create one of two responses. The person will ether change the
subject or distance themselves from you. Over time, you will not be their go-to.
2. NO EXPLANATION NEEDED
If someone is disparaging you or making you feel “less than,” depending on the
context, you could try saying something like, “Thank you for sharing that.”
It is hard to have an argument with someone who is not pushing back. If you feel that
you must try to explain yourself, recognize that it is going to be exhausting. You are
fighting a battle where you will not be heard.
“Choose your friends wisely, and ask them to hold you accountable for
setting boundaries and following through.”
3. BUY TIME
If you do not think that you can respond with total control of your emotions and/or
the situation, reschedule the meeting. These situations work better if you can plan for
your reaction in advance. You do not have to join every battle you are invited to. It is
OK to ask yourself privately if there is anything accurate or useful to you in what the
toxic person is saying.
4. MANAGE YOUR TRUTH

Comments, statements and opinions are often the truth of the person giving them.
Know your truth, know your strengths and weaknesses, and be honest with yourself.

Your truth and someone else’s truth may not be the same. Focus on your actions, not
theirs, and never allow yourself to start with negative self-talk. If you need a reminder,
write a mantra, and place it where you will see it whenever you’re talking to the toxic
person.
5. JUDGMENT DOESN’T HELP

Operate from a place of curiosity and respect. Know who you are, and operate from
that place every time you encounter a toxic person. Do not assume their intent is
negative; instead, ask questions to understand the root of the issue. While you do
that, see the first tip again.
6. PHONE A FRIEND
Choose your friends wisely, and ask them to hold you accountable for setting
boundaries and following through.
7. DON’T BE A VICTIM
Set boundaries, and be clear about them and about your decisions. Clarify your
goals, your timelines and your needs. It is never OK to be someone’s victim.

COACHING TIME MANAGEMENT: THE UNDERRATED TOOL FOR
SALES LEADERS
Justin Zappulla is a managing partner at Janek Performance Group and co-author of “Critical
Selling: How Top Performers Accelerate the Sales Process and Close More Deals.” With extensive
sales performance management and training expertise, he works with hundreds of companies to
develop and implement strategic sales performance solutions.
Sales reps have a lot of duties to juggle in a day, especially in high-volume verticals.
In fact, as Ken Krogue, founder of InsideSales.com, discovered in a research study last
year, sales reps spend only one-third of their time selling – fewer than three hours per
day. The study also found that reps with a “specific time management philosophy”
spend almost 19% more time selling – up to 53.4% of their day.
Time management is a critical skill for sales reps to acquire, and who better to help
than their sales managers? Here is a guide for sales managers to help your direct
reports develop and hone time management skills.
1. ASSESS YOUR SYSTEMS TO SEE IF THEY’RE THE CULPRIT IN TIME LEAKS

It might be that the systems you’re using are creating time leaks. For example, maybe
you’re scheduling too many meetings, or perhaps your reps are having problems with
your customer relationship management system (CRM) – either because of issues
with the program itself or because they don’t know how to optimize their use of it.
To determine whether there’s something amiss within the company’s systems and
processes, talk to or survey your team, and ask them what the biggest impediments
are to their productivity or what changes they believe would improve their time
management. Every team’s scenario is going to be different, so conduct a diagnostic
(see below) before proceeding with any changes. You’ll want the numbers in front of
you to ensure your adjustments will benefit everyone.
2. HAVE SALES REPS TRACK THEIR TIME

Before you can begin teaching time management, you have to know how your team
members are allocating their time. To that end, have them track it, and then compare
the data against the priorities and guidelines of your organization. Are they spending
enough time on the activities mandated by your key performance indicators (KPIs)?
What do their results look like? For top performers, you likely won’t be doing much –
what they’re doing is probably working. It’s the average and underachieving reps who
most stand to benefit from time management coaching.

Coaching Time Management: The Underrated Tool for Sales Leaders
Review the data for time leaks and inefficiencies, and then meet with each rep to go
over the data together and come up with a plan for optimizing their time. Consensus
is key here – you want to avoid a top-down directive that would reduce compliance,
and you also don’t want to impose a one-size-fits-all methodology. Each rep is a
unique person with different challenges and motivation. Going to a regimented,
universal time management approach will help some reps improve, but others will
decline.
3. BREAK DOWN LARGE PROJECTS INTO STEP-BY-STEP PROCESSES

One of the most effective time management coaching tools is to take a large project
(such as presenting to a major potential client) and break it down into a series of
step-by-step processes. Estimate how long each step of each phase of the process
will take, and set goals and benchmarks to signal the completion of each phase.
This process might also involve collaboration with other departments – for example,
working with marketing to create collateral – so you’ll need to work with your
counterparts in those divisions when plotting out the timeline.
Then, check in periodically to make sure that your reps are sticking to the timeline
and are on track to meet the goals and objectives. If they’re struggling with a
certain task, work together to figure out how to resolve the impasse and proceed as
projected.
“Time management is a soft skill that is frequently neglected.”
4. TEACH THE ART AND SCIENCE OF BETTER TIME ESTIMATION

One of the biggest time management mistakes people make is underestimating
how long an activity will take, which leads to what’s referred in psychology as the
planning fallacy: Our projections of how long something will take are often based on
best-case scenarios that don’t foresee delays in the process, which almost certainly
will happen. (See every home remodel TV show and film ever created for examples).
Part of coaching time management is helping reps determine how long a given task
is actually likely to take and adjust their schedule accordingly.
Time management is a soft skill that is frequently neglected. By practicing good time
management habits yourself and teaching them to your sales reps, you can have a
more focused, productive and high-morale team.

UNCLOGGING THE COMMUNICATION CHANNEL
Julie Benezet earned her stripes as Amazon’s first global real estate executive and for the past 16
years has coached and consulted with executives from virtually every industry. She is the award-
winning author of “The Journey of Not Knowing: How 21st Century Leaders Can Chart a Course
Where There Is None,” and her new workbook, “The Journal of Not Knowing,” a self-guided
discovery to learn how to navigate the discomfort of the new to pursue one’s dreams, was released
in fall 2018.
Aaron slowly made his way to his desk, his early-morning coffee sloshing over the
rim of the cup. Fortunately, it missed the front of his favorite T-shirt. He didn’t notice.
Instead, his eyes fixated on the floor as he mulled over his sister’s visit the night
before. For some reason, she had decided to audit his lifestyle.
“All you do is work!” she said, throwing up her hands in disgust. “Look around this
apartment. There’s no sign of life. The food should be carbon-dated, the furniture has
more lint than fabric and the bathroom needs a hazmat sign!”
Aaron liked his life. He managed the technology department of a product

development firm. His expertise in designing the underlying technology for the firm’s
products made him indispensable. It also afforded him independence. While he had
friends in the company, he didn’t have to spend time with people he disliked. He
particularly had no patience for people who didn’t understand technology.
“Communication succeeds when people connect on ideas, information or

feelings and then arrive at a shared understanding.”
That happy state was about to end. Last week, Aaron’s manager informed him that
he could not promote him to director unless he improved his internal customer
relationships. This news depressed him.
Right now, however, he was thinking about his sister. Her criticism stung, and he had
no idea what to do about it.
Aaron’s rumination stopped abruptly. Before him stood Marsha, the firm’s driven
product manager. She regarded him with a big, insincere smile. She wanted
something. Marsha definitely resided on his “do not like” list. He thought she was
stupid, because after four years at the company, she still didn’t understand its
technology.

Marsha personified ambition, always working to cultivate political allies. She did well
in her job, except when it came to technology. Last week, she could not explain to
the executive team why a feature for the new Project 5A failed. The CEO, who had
championed her career, sent her back to find a satisfactory explanation. She felt
humiliated.
She also felt and looked exhausted, having stayed up the previous night caring for
two sick children. She found dealing with Aaron challenging at the best of times.
Today, with the combined pressure of reforming her reputation with the executive
team and fatigue, talking with him would rival a root canal.
“Hi!” said she, mustering up her perky best.
Aaron grunted something that sounded like, “Hi.”
“I guess you heard about the Project 5A problem.”
He looked at her warily. “One might say so. I heard they didn’t install the technology
right.”
The smile dissolved. “‘They?’ Aren’t you ‘Technology’?”
Aaron glanced up at the ceiling, then back down at Marsha. “Tech invents, and you
install what we create. It’s up to you to do that correctly.”
“What? How are we supposed to know how to do that? That’s not our training!”
“It would be, if you bothered to attend our training sessions,” came the retort.
The “conversation” deteriorated from there.
This scene between Aaron and Marsha exemplifies poor communication. Neither
person asked, heard or took any time to learn what the other needed. They merely
widened the gap between them.
Communication succeeds when people connect on ideas, information or feelings and

then arrive at a shared understanding. They might not agree on everything, but they
learn enough about each other to unite on an idea.
UNCLOGGING THE COMMUNICATION CHANNEL: THREE INFLUENCING FACTORS

Connection occurs when people clear out the white noise that prevents them from

gathering important information about each other. Three factors influence how well
they do:
1. Needs
Needs provide motivational drivers. They are personal and cover a range of
possibilities, including a need for power, a promotion, acknowledgement, friendship
or technical knowledge. When people know their driver, it lends focus and a reminder
of why they are in the room.
2. Perceptions
Perceptions arise from what a person’s five senses detect and what might inhibit
them. For example, a noisy room could make it difficult to hear words or vocal tone.
People’s history with each other can also impact perceptions. If someone has had a
negative experience with another person, he or she might interpret a frown as hostile
rather than concentrating.
“Communication requires knowledge and compassion.”
3. Emotional and Physical State

Everyone brings their moods to a conversation. A person who is feeling depressed
would struggle with being positive. Physical state also has an impact; a cold or a
headache can easily dampen one’s enthusiasm.
UNCLOGGING YOUR COMMUNICATION CHANNEL: FIVE STRATEGIES

To unclog the channel to learn and connect with another person, here are some
strategies for navigating the three influencing factors:
1. Know What You Need

Write down what you need, and then use it to organize your thoughts. Aaron and
Marsha each needed something from the other. Aaron had to improve his relationship
with Marsha to win a promotion. Marsha needed Aaron’s technical knowledge to
restore her credibility with the executive team. Awareness of their respective needs
would have provided the motivation to interact more constructively.

2. Not Feeling Well? Postpone.

Marsha was exhausted from a long night caring for children. If she had delayed
talking with Aaron until she felt more rested, she might have been less reactive.
3. Know Your Shared History

If you have had a bad experience with a person that could color your current
perceptions of them, think about how the issue evolved, your contribution to it and
whether you can move past it to advance your cause. Aaron disrespected Marsha for
not knowing technology, but he most likely had not made any extra effort to offer
her training. Had he done so, she might have trusted him more, and he might have
disliked her less.
4. Remember That Every Conversation Has Two Sides

Both parties bring their own channel-clogging influences. If Aaron had noticed that
Marsha looked tired, he might have asked her how she was doing. Had Marsha paid
attention to Aaron’s preoccupation when she first saw him, she could have asked
how he was doing before demanding help. Given their rocky relationship, these
simple questions might have felt risky, but noticing invites connection. It signifies the
other person matters.
5. Accept That You Won’t Know Everything

There are things people will never admit to you but that nevertheless will influence
the conversation. Given the distrust between Aaron and Marsha, Aaron probably
would not reveal to her the impact of his sister’s comments on his emotional state, no
matter what Marsha asked. Still, Marsha should have not personalized his mood but,
rather, respected it by modulating her behavior.
Communication requires knowledge and compassion. Learning what influences both

you and the people you connect with pays endless dividends.

IT ALL STARTS WITH NOTICING: MINDFULNESS AND SOFT SKILLS
Scott Rose is the vice president of consulting services at Impact International.
The skills that we will require in the future are, increasingly, the ones that cannot
be mechanized or automated. These are what are often referred to as soft skills. In
fact, the top five skills for 2020, according to the World Economic Forum, include
complex problem-solving, critical thinking, cognitive flexibility and creativity. Within
each of these skills is a subset of enabling mindsets and behaviors, including
systemic thinking, a growth mindset, active listening, critical questioning and creating
psychological safety.
Absent from this list, but a foundational soft skill in a manager’s leadership toolkit,
is “noticing,” a hard-to-teach soft skill responsible for increasing leadership
effectiveness, navigating change, and leading through complex and ambiguous times
with agility. Foundational to emotional intelligence and developing the capacity for
leadership action is awareness of self, others, and the surrounding environment or
systemic connections. Reframing awareness to “noticing” makes this critical skill
more accessible. It refers to the observation and perception of focused attention and
is an active and intentional approach.
“Two key aspects of noticing include developing the propensity to

become inwardly aware and outwardly alert.”
WHAT GETS IN THE WAY

The workplace can be a distracted place, full of emails, texts, phone calls and internal
communication channels that constantly need attention. Added to this situation, the
thinking brain can become unhelpful when thoughts take us away from the present.
A full calendar with a looming meeting, an ever-growing to-do list, pressure felt from
increasing workloads and reduced resources are common tensions that will often
trigger a threat response and reduced attention to the present.
Many people have, during a conversation with a colleague, made the appropriate
responses with a strategically placed “Mmm…” or nod of the head, while actually
thinking about how to smoothly exit the conversation to be able to return to other
pressing needs. This form of distracted listening reduces our ability to notice cues
that will better inform our behavior. In order to make a change, we need to have

It All Starts With Noticing: Mindfulness and Soft Skills
mindful agency – the propensity to be mindful in the moment.
“NOTICING” FRAMEWORKS
A framework can help us become more effective at noticing by focusing our
attention to intentional and specific criteria. Two key aspects of noticing include
developing the propensity to become inwardly aware and outwardly alert.
Inwardly Aware
Being inwardly aware means developing the self-awareness to be able to recognize
emotions, thoughts and physical sensations. Taking the example of distracted
listening, inward awareness is being attentive to when our thoughts get in the way of
our ability to notice. Mindfulness practices can help in these situations by enabling us
to note the thought and let it go, so we can return to a more active form of listening.
Acknowledging emotions provides an opportunity to be curious and explore where
we need to make changes. It also includes an increased awareness of cognitive bias,
which may affect the way we perceive events around us.
Outwardly Alert
Being outwardly alert broadens our attention to focused behaviors. A common
challenge for many leaders is to translate strategy into action for others. Without a
solid awareness of others’ needs and preferences, however, strategic communications
can miss the mark. Another example is ineffective teamwork, where alienation and
exclusion are characteristic features of a team when working under pressure. If there
is an intention to increase alertness for this tendency, you are more likely to notice
the need to combat it when it arises.
DEVELOPING NOTICING SKILLS

As with any other skill, the ability to become more effective at noticing requires
intentional practice to form new habits. Mindfulness, reflection, seeking feedback and
developing a greater understanding of others are practices that can help you develop
the ability to notice.
Of course, there is a balance; being overly focused can be unhelpful and actually
reduce your ability to notice effectively. Noticing is only the start; you should follow
it with critical questioning and curiosity. By developing effective noticing skills, you
can increase your propensity to take appropriate action that will make a positive
difference in the workplace.

3 “SOFT SKILLS” THAT ARE ACTUALLY HARD SKILLS
Rebecca Taylor has 10 years of experience in talent acquisition, talent management training and
coaching. As GoCoach’s chief operating officer, she designs and frames learning initiatives within
organizations and helps clients leverage the personalized learning that coaching provides.
There is an ongoing conversation about what skills people need to fulfill themselves
and support their companies – but what these needed skills are is often ambiguous.
Some say soft skills (e.g., emotional intelligence, communication and change
management) are the most important, and others say hard skills (e.g., technology,
customer service and basic work skills) take priority to enter and thrive in the
workforce. We talk a lot about what differentiates hard skills from soft skills. The real
question is, “Why do they have to be different at all?”
When it comes to talent management and training, it’s common to put labels on
things. We have learning for entry-level employees, tactical training for specific
teams, leadership development and so on. We define the types of learning we offer
before we understand the learner themselves. Much like how we like to box ourselves
into categories based on appearance and thought, we build boxes and apply labels
that categorize us based on agility and ability. Let us break out of those boxes and
redefine our potential together so that we can help, coach and develop another. Let’s
remove labels and open our eyes to opportunities.
“When organizations provide space for their employees to learn, there is

a sense of safety and empowerment to grow.”
When you invest in others, they invest in you. When you create a training program
that embraces diversity of experience, thought and learning preference, it brings
significant opportunity to your organization. When organizations provide space
for their employees to learn, there is a sense of safety and empowerment to grow.
Diverse learning eliminates prejudices and instead ignites thought, creativity,
innovation and inclusion. It provokes a real conversation that becomes less
opinionated “think piece” and more diverse thought that creates space for people to
grow and thrive.
The way to really assess potential and accelerate innovation is through data and
intuition. We know what is right and wrong, and we balance that knowledge with

data to keep us confident in our decision-making. It starts with the skills that enable
us to pause and evaluate but still make quick decisions with long-term aspirations.
We all fail; it is how we learn from those failures that matters.
The soft skills that involve knowing your authenticity and how it impacts others
will help you learn hard skills and progress on the path of continuous education.
Learning “hard skills” is easy; it is how you apply them that matters. Your emotional
intelligence (EQ), along with your ability to infer and communicate, are the key soft
skills that turn helpful tactics into useable lessons. The intention behind what you
learn and how you apply it is what matters.
To know how to apply what you learn, you just need others, who know things you
don’t know, to believe in you and help you. The three soft skills below, which are
inherent to learning, will help you lead, prosper and advance others.
“When you talk in a proactive way and look toward the future,
engagement, retention and culture flourish.”
COMMUNICATION
The ability to communicate effectively isn’t typically considered a skill on par with
coding, math or analytics. But when employees have a well-developed ability
to communicate, companies can unlock their potential in a way that creates
inclusiveness and innovation. Opinions may vary, but clear and direct communication
helps you lead with authenticity and intention.
Projects fall behind, relationships are tense, turnover happens – and the repercussions
are ongoing – but when you talk in a proactive way and look toward the future,
anything is possible, and engagement, retention and culture flourish.
EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE
If there were only “doers” in the world, we wouldn’t get far, because we wouldn’t have
understanding. There were a lot of decisions in the tech industry, for example, that
led to questionable decisions about privacy and data use. As a leader, it’s important
to see the bigger picture of decisions, set strategic direction and ensure that what
you do helps the organization go where it needs to go. Not everyone is a born leader,
but there are many of ways to learn how to be one. Leadership is why EQ is such an

important skill – and why it’s a hard skill to learn. It’s a skill that’s required to finish the
job. It is meeting people where they are to educate them for the future.
CHANGE MANAGEMENT
Everyone needs to evolve and change; in fact, we are constantly in evolution and
transformation. To ensure no one is left behind in this insta-quick world, we need to
build a bridge for each other, because together, we are stronger. Change is tough and
drives fear of the unknown. We need to plan for the unknown and educate others to
gain a full, diverse perspective of the vision for the future. We cannot fear change
but, instead, embrace it as an educational experience to help each other grow.
Understand the “why” behind change and how it impacts you, and develop a plan to
embrace it and evolve. This process is what drives inclusion.
These soft skills not only drive further education of ourselves and others but also the
diversity and inclusion of our path forward. Let’s box in, instead of boxing out, our
potential. Our potential is how we treat each other and learn from each other. Our
soft skills evolved us, and our hard skills come to life with our diversity and evolution
of the soft side. If you want inclusion, begin here. It is our path.

GRAB YOUR BOSS’ ATTENTION: 5 TIPS FOR COMMUNICATING UP
Marie Verity is a partner success manager at Vital Learning.
Do you think that your communication with your boss is always smooth, efficient
and on point? Or do things sometimes seem disjointed? Many of the challenges that
employees face in their relationships with their boss are related to communication.
How effectively you communicate with your boss can impact your success at your
organization. It can determine whether or not your ideas become realities. And it can
play a huge role in the level of rapport you establish with your boss.
Below are five tips that that can help you upgrade your communication skills with
your boss. (We call it “communicating up.”) Follow these simple guidelines, and you
and your boss will enjoy the benefits.
1. CONSIDER YOUR BOSS’ COMMUNICATION STYLE

Identifying and mastering the “language” that your boss speaks is crucial to your
successful collaboration. If e-mails are their preferred medium, don’t regularly pop
into their office with random thoughts or questions.
The frequency of your communication is also important. Being proactive can be

great in certain cases, but don’t become overwhelming, especially if your boss just
needs weekly updates. On the other hand, acting too laid back and hardly letting
your boss in on any developments might give them the wrong impression.
Finally, determine the amount of detail that you should share about a project or
discussion item. More than likely, your boss doesn’t have time to read through your
two-page e-mail, and it might distracted them from the point of your message if you
overwhelm them with too much information.
“The strength of a great manager is not foreseeing the future but dealing
with challenges calmly and productively.”
2. DELIVER CLEAR AND CONCISE MESSAGES

It’s important to learn to deliver information clearly. Remember, just because the

point you’re making may be clear to you doesn’t mean your boss feels the same way.
Consider how you communicate with your significant other. Everyone has instances
where they feel they’ve explained something repeatedly, and yet their partner is
genuinely surprised to hear that they have been told something numerous times.
People in close personal relationships will likely let you know when your message
isn’t effective. But are you sure that your boss will?
Sometimes, there is simply too much information, or the situation feels too
complicated, for you to describe it clearly in one go. Prepare and rehearse before the
actual conversation, and draft a plan:
1. Start with a summary of your message, problem or update to let your boss know
what the conversation will be about.
2. State your objective, and list the relevant details. Be ready to answer questions by
anticipating your boss’ suggestions and points of contention in advance.
3. Move on to agreeing on the most efficient outcome.
4. Summarize next steps.
This structure will help you deliver your message, brainstorm solutions and determine
a plan of action.
3. SUMMARIZE AND PRESENT RECOMMENDATIONS

Even if you think you’ve anticipated all possible negative outcomes of a situation,
you might still fail to predict one. The strength of a great manager is not foreseeing
the future but dealing with challenges calmly and productively and communicating
openly throughout the process.
Before presenting an issue to your boss, think about the ways you could resolve it.
Weigh the options, and prepare your recommendation (and why you believe it’s the
best route). And don’t forget to transmit positivity! It seems obvious, but it’s hard
to do when you are stressed and deadlines are tight. Your boss is a person just like
you, and if they learn to expect positive “can-do” attitude from you, they will be more
open to your ideas.
4. CLARIFY COMMUNICATION PREFERENCES

As you learn more about your boss, take mental notes on how they prefer to receive
information. Remember how you were asked to prepare a brief bullet-point report

and then spent hours creating a massive presentation with spreadsheets and graphs?
No wonder your work wasn’t appreciated. Delivering information in the right format
will ensure that your boss will hear and understand your message and will save you
time and unnecessary work.
If you still can’t figure out your boss, and you never know how to present information,
don’t hesitate to ask. Instead of trying to guess or wing it, have a conversation with
your boss, and ask them what they expect. Once you’ve learned the rules of the
game, play it with dignity.
Remember how good it feels when people communicate with you the way you
prefer. Treat your boss accordingly, and you’ll be surprised how efficient your
workflow will become.
“Outside interference can kill your momentum; schedule the meeting at a

time when you’ll have your boss’ undivided attention.”
5. MATCH THE CONTEXT OF THE SITUATION

If you need to communicate about the progress of a project, send a quick e-mail;
connect on a call; or choose another medium, frequency and amount of detail that
you consider appropriate.
However, if there is an issue or development that requires a meeting, make sure

to schedule it in advance. Timing is everything, and knocking on your boss’ door
is a gamble; they might be busy preparing for a call with a client, thinking about
an upcoming quarterly meeting or even taking a mental break. Suddenly, you find
yourself pitching an idea and wondering why your boss is distracted. Outside
interference can kill your momentum; that is why it’s crucial to schedule the meeting
at a time when you’ll have your boss’ undivided attention. You could even take it to a
conference room or a coffee shop to avoid interruptions.
Communicating up is not always easy, but now you have some tricks up your sleeve
that will help you stay calm, focused and effective. Continue to practice and apply
these skills, and you’re on your way to becoming an expert communicator!

CAN YOU TEACH MOTIVATION?
Susan Fowler implores leaders to stop trying to motivate people and is on a mission to help others
learn the skill of motivation. She is the author of “Master Your Motivation: Three Scientific Truths for
Achieving Your Goals,” out in June; the best-selling “Self Leadership and The One Minute Manager”
with Ken Blanchard; and “Why Motivating People Doesn’t Work … And What Does: The New
Science of Leading, Engaging, and Energizing.”
You can teach a salesperson to use a new customer information system, but can
you teach her to be motivated to use it consistently each week? You can learn the
new procedure for completing your expense reports, but can you learn how to be
motivated to submit them on time?
You probably spends countless hours and money training people on the skills they
need to do their jobs. Many organizations spend even more to incentivize, entice
or outright bribe people to use those skills. But rarely do training organizations
take advantage of compelling science to deal with the most critical determinant of
whether people apply those skills: motivation.
Which begs the question: Is motivation a skill that can be taught, learned and
nurtured? The answer is: It depends.
“Optimal motivation is fueled by satisfying choice, connection

and competence.”
TO TEACH MOTIVATION AS A SKILL, CONSIDER THREE IMPERATIVES:
1. Let go of outdated theories that relegate motivation to the dark ages.

Scratch beneath the surface of leadership competencies for managing people’s
motivation, and you’ll find B.F. Skinner’s detrimental carrots (incentives) and sticks
(fear and punishment), McClelland’s misleading achievement motivation (based on
power), or Maslow’s misinterpreted hierarchy of needs (never proven and potentially
more harmful than helpful).
2. Challenge traditional beliefs that undermine the true nature of human motivation.
If you and your executives still believe that “it’s not personal; it’s just business” or that
the primary purpose of business is to make money or that to obtain results, you need

to hold people accountable, you are at risk of thwarting the psychological needs that
must be met for people to perform and thrive at work.
3. Recognize the difference between the quantity and the quality of a person’s
motivation.
When it comes to motivation, what matters most is the quality of the motivation.
Motivation is the psychological energy that influences your physical energy to act. If
you want to jump-start physical energy, you might eat a candy bar or drink a cup of
coffee. After the sugar spike and caffeine rush, your blood sugar plummets, leaving
you needing another energy fix. But when you eat a handful of almonds or a healthy
breakfast, you not only generate energy, but you also create sustainable energy more
conducive to high performance.
The same is true with motivation. “Junk food” motivation is fueled by rewards,
incentives, power, status, fear or shame – the psychological equivalents of sugar and
caffeine. You may experience an initial rush of energy, but the sub-optimal motivation
you created cannot sustain the energy required to attain your goals or flourish while
pursing them.
Optimal motivation is fueled by satisfying choice, connection and competence –

the three psychological nutrients required for innovation, productivity, sustainable
performance, and mental and physical well-being. Research shows that when people
create choice, connection and competence, they generate the positive energy they
need to pursue and achieve their goals and thrive.
HOW TO TEACH PEOPLE TO MASTER THEIR MOTIVATION: THE 3 CS
1. Teach people to create choice.

• When we’re burdened by sub-optimal motivation, we should ask ourselves,
“What choices do I have?” Sometimes, just realizing that we have choices help
us make the right one.
• Teach proactive self-leadership skills: how to deal effectively with a
micromanaging manager, clarify unclear goals, ask for feedback, be a problem-
solver and negotiate for authority.
• Initiate conversations to help people discover their own values-based reasons to
act, as opposed to traditional external motivators like incentives, awards, prizes
and rankings they don’t control.

2. Teach people to create connection.

• Engage in motivation conversations to help people discover meaning in
everyday goals, tasks and situations and to recognize how they contribute to
something greater than themselves.
• Create a space for people to be honest about their needs, fears and
vulnerabilities, and teach them to use the phrase “I need” to ask for help when
they need it.
• Encourage people to speak up against injustice and unfairness, and teach them
how to do it effectively.
3. Teach people to create competence.

• Promote discussions about what’s been learned – not just what’s been
accomplished.
• Craft action plans for achieving goals that focus on a process for learning, not
just meeting milestones.
• Remind people to never assume competence; if they haven’t demonstrated
they are able to do something, encourage them to open their mind to learning
something new.
“Motivation is a skill that people can learn to apply anywhere, at

any time.”
Back to the example of completing expense reports: Instead of bribing people (or
yourself) with intangible or tangible rewards to submit the reports on time, imagine
applying the skill of motivation.
1. Create choice.
What choices do I have? I could choose not to complete my expense reports on time,
or I could choose to submit them on time. It’s my choice. Usually I procrastinate, and
I hate the pressure, guilt and frustration hanging over me. One time, I chose to turn
them in on time, and it felt good.
2. Create connection.
How can I bring meaning to expense reports? Submitting my expense reports on

time would be helpful to Jenny. She’s in charge of collecting expenses and making
sure they are billed to clients and reimbursed to me in a timely manner. When I’m
late, I negatively affect her ability to do her job. I also value being a person who
keeps her word. Submitting my reports on time is aligned to my values for helping
others, living with integrity and being a good corporate citizen.
3. Create competence.
What can I learn from completing expense reports? I just learned how to use the
foreign money converter, and it’s so much easier than it used to be! I’m sure there are
other features that would make the process more efficient if I were open to learning
them. Maybe I could even mentor others who are struggling.
Can you teach motivation? The answer is a resounding yes – if you move beyond
outdated motivation theories and beliefs to embrace the latest science of motivation.
Motivation is a skill that people can learn to apply anywhere, at any time. People can
master their motivation by learning to create the choice, connection and competence
required to experience optimal motivation for achieving their goals – and flourishing.

EMPATHY IN LEADERSHIP: CREATING A CULTURE OF
UNDERSTANDING
Daniel Goleman, the distinguished author who popularized the components of

emotional intelligence, put it best in his 1995 book “Emotional Intelligence: Why
It Can Matter More than IQ” when he said, “If you can’t have empathy and have
effective relationships, then no matter how smart you are, you are not going to
get very far.” This sentiment still proves true. Being empathic and truly “putting
yourself in someone else’s shoes” is not just important in fostering positive personal
relationships … it’s vital for the smooth operation of organizations across industries.
Mind Tools defines empathy as “the ability to identify and understand another’s
situation, feelings and motives.” Empathy is in high demand among both employees
and employers; according to Businesssolver’s 2019 “State of Workplace Empathy”
study, 90% of employees say they’re more likely to stay with an empathic employer,
and 87% of CEOs believe empathy is linked to financial performance.
Dr. Helen Riess, director of the Empathy and Relational Science Program at
Massachusetts General Hospital and associate clinical professor at Harvard Medical
School, has devoted her time, energy and research to the subject of empathy. More
specifically, she investigates whether empathy can be taught — and after extensive
research, she found that it can. Now, after founding empathy training company
Empathetics, Riess has seen firsthand the impact empathy has on a multitude of
organizations and industries.
“Creating a culture of empathy means acknowledging the individual

emotions and experiences of team members.”
Riess notes that empathy in the workplace sets the tone that people matter. “A
culture of empathy gives people the benefit of the doubt that they are probably
doing their best and, if for some reason they’re not, it seeks to understand what
might be impeding good performance before judging or punishing,” she says.
Learning and development (L&D) professionals can help leaders develop this keen
sense of understanding by encouraging them to get to know their team members —
and their unique strengths and weaknesses — on a deeper level.

Empathy in the workplace can also help increase both individual and team
performance — and it starts with leadership. “The goal of the leader is to lead people.
Often, we talk about leaders leading organizations, but organizations are made up of
people and, in order to keep employees or a workforce engaged, productive, feeling
positive, and collaborating and cooperating with others, they need to be treated
that way [by] their leaders. The leaders set the tone for how people are treated in an
organization,” Riess says.
Empathic leaders also play a role in increasing employee engagement among team
members. Riess says that having an empathic leader “energizes a team, makes
them want to come to work, and makes people feel like they’re all in it for the good
of the company or the good of the mission.” Thus, employee engagement and job
satisfaction are both improved through empathic leadership.
Sandy Rogers, managing director of FranklinCovey’s loyalty practice, has seen

empathy drive major business results by working with numerous organizations
throughout his career. In “Leading Loyalty: Cracking the Code to Customer Devotion,”
which Rogers wrote along with Leena Rinne and Shawn Moon, empathy is identified
as one of three key core loyalty practices, along with responsibility and generosity.
Rogers says that making a genuine human connection is the first step in creating
empathy. The second step is learning an individual’s hidden story, because “without
listening to what’s most important or urgent to others, without knowing their story,
we’re not going to have empathy for them,” Rogers says.
“L&D professionals are well positioned to help leaders become more

empathic and drive lasting organizational change.”
While leading with empathy does require a greater focus on human connection
and understanding, it’s important to note that empathy doesn’t have to be a chore.
Demonstrating empathy can be as simple as making eye contact with a visibly
distressed team member from across the room or actively listening to others, “not
just with your ears, but with your eyes and heart too,” Rogers notes.
Therefore, teaching leaders active listening skills, such as asking questions, offering
verbal and nonverbal feedback to show signs of listening, and summarizing, is
another way L&D professionals can help leaders become more empathic.

For leaders, creating a culture of empathy means acknowledging the individual

emotions and experiences of team members, which, in turn, increases trust and
drives better business results. Rogers explains, “As we have empathy for others, we
are on the road to earning their loyalty, and, as we earn customer’s loyalty, we will
encourage them to buy more from us and recommend us to all their friends — and
that’s the key to business growth and bigger profits.”
Additionally, Riess notes that knowing you’re cared about as a whole person can be
more important than a raise for some employees. As a result, “if you have a workforce
engaged at that level, you really can’t help but have a better bottom line — because
everybody’s all in.”
For Michael Ventura, founder and CEO of brand strategy and design company Sub
Rosa and author of “Applied Empathy: The New Language of Leadership,” empathy
is more than a leadership skill — it’s a business model. After realizing that all of
Sub Rosa’s successes involved empathy in one way or another, the team decided
to incorporate empathy into all facets of business, a process it named “applied
empathy.”
After adopting a corporate culture of empathy, Ventura shares, “What has emerged is
this really supportive culture where people genuinely have each other’s best interests
in mind and work to help each other through challenges that emerge. It was never in
the playbook, but it has become the north star — and we’re really happy about that.”
For leaders wanting to become more empathic, don’t fear: Like Riess, Ventura
believes that empathy can be taught. “I’m a firm believer that … [the] cognitive
aspect of empathy is very trainable.”
By helping leaders develop critical active listening skills, build a greater

understanding of individual team members and create a more supportive work
culture, L&D professionals are well positioned to help leaders become more empathic
and, as a result, drive lasting organizational change.

CHAPTER 2
WHY DO SOFT SKILLS MATTER?

WHY SOFT SKILLS ARE THE COMPETITIVE ADVANTAGE OF THE
21ST CENTURY
Ben Taylor is the content marketing manager at Richardson. He has an MBA in finance from
LaSalle University and over a decade of business and writing experience, including covering
content for Nasdaq, Barclaycard and Business Insider.
For decades, leaders committed to the adage, “What is measured is managed,” and
they focused on skills that were measurable: hard skills. Measurability made it easy
to determine if an employee was performing or not. Assessments were quantitative,
definitive and unambiguous.
This approach worked in a business landscape where hard skills drove productivity.
Then, affordable, efficient technology brought businesses to a point where faster
was no longer an advantage. Now, advantages come from effective communication,
adaptability and cooperation, which are all soft skills.
Unfortunately, soft skills have gotten a bad name, literally. The word “soft” suggests
that they are vague and shapeless, which is untrue. In fact, the origin of the term
comes from a 1972 Army training manual, according to Katherine S. Newman’s book
“Chutes and Ladders: Navigating the Low-Wage Labor Market.” There is nothing soft
about the value of communication, adaptability and cooperation on the battlefield.
The groundswell of interest in soft skills is clear from recent research, in which
Harvard University professor David Deming found that “between 1980 and 2012, jobs
requiring high levels of social interaction grew by nearly 12 percentage points as a
share of the U.S. labor force.” Businesses and the leaders who run them are placing
more value on soft skills for three reasons:
1. SOFT SKILLS START WHERE TECHNOLOGY ENDS

Technology cannot replicate soft skills. In fact, technology cannot even replicate the
soft skills of a five-year-old. At this age, we develop theory of mind, or the ability to
understand the mental state of another person. Theory of mind is the academic way
of saying we can put ourselves in another person’s shoes. Artificial intelligence (AI),
for all its popularity, cannot.
In fact, “most of the AI you know today people would call narrow AI,” says Ginni
Rometty, CEO of IBM. “It learns to do one thing, in one domain.” She concludes that
AI that is equal to human cognition is decades away, if it happens at all. Moreover, AI
is only as strong as the underlying data; she says that you cannot have an effective

AI solution without a strong information architecture underpinning the system.
Even a robust data set can only go so far in equipping a business to make the
complex decisions it needs to succeed. The reason is that not all data can be
quantified with a number. In fact, most decisions arise from a combination of
emotion and analysis. Consider the work of Nobel Prize-winning psychologist Daniel
Kahneman, who defines these two processes as “system 1” and “system 2” thinking.
System 1 thinking is rapid and based in emotion, while system 2 is slow and analytic.
“When all goes smoothly, which is most of the time,” writes Kahneman in his book
“Thinking Fast and Slow,” “System 2 adopts the suggestions of System 1 with little
or no modification.” Soft skills form the basis of system 1 thinking, which is critical to
decision-making.
“Skills like team building, work ethic, creativity and problem-solving are
empowering in any role, across industries.”
2. SOFT SKILLS ARE A UNIVERSAL ADVANTAGE

Soft skills are an advantage in any environment. Skills like team building, work ethic,
creativity and problem-solving are empowering in any role, across industries. On the
other hand, the defining characteristic of technology is that it changes. Hard skills
that are relevant today will not be relevant tomorrow.
This idea helps explain the findings from Google’s Project Oxygen. About a decade
ago, Google decided to leverage its considerable data to understand what makes
leaders effective. Researchers analyzed performance reviews, promotion data and
feedback surveys. The results identified eight key attributes of high-performing
people, and technical expertise ranked last on this list of eight.
“In the Google context, we’d always believed that to be a manager, particularly on
the engineering side, you need to be as deep or deeper a technical expert than
the people who work for you,” remarked Laszlo Bock, then Google’s vice president
of human resources. “It turns out that that’s absolutely the least important thing.
It’s important, but pales in comparison. Much more important is just making that
connection and being accessible.”
These findings, which support the notion that soft skills are critical, were later
supported by another Google initiative called Project Aristotle. In 2012, the company
studied hundreds of internal teams to see why some succeeded and others failed.

Statisticians, psychologists and engineers led the project. One of their key findings
was that psychological safety drove team success. Building psychological safety into
a team atmosphere is a soft skill.
In other words, technical expertise matters, but the soft skills needed to bring out
that expertise matter more.
“Business is about building and marinating relationships – and

relationships are about soft skills.”
3. SOFT SKILLS DRIVE SUSTAINMENT

Research shows that competitive advantages are becoming short-lived. For example,
A.T. Kearney found that “about two-thirds of companies have a strategy horizon
of four years or less.” And, in a 2013 Harvard Business Review article, Columbia
professor Rita McGrath explains that successful companies are no longer relying on
fleeting competitive advantages. Instead, they’re relying on what she calls “transient
advantage.”
“Companies can’t afford to spend months at a time crafting a single long-term

strategy,” McGrath writes. “To stay ahead, they need to constantly start new strategic
initiatives.” Making this plan work requires soft skills, because businesses now need
team members who can effectively communicate those shifting strategic initiatives.
As the pace of strategy intensifies, leaders need skills like time management,
flexibility, resourcefulness and the ability to mentor to execute on multiple initiatives.
Companies can no longer rely on driving revenue from a single capability, because
technology has allowed other, more agile companies to enter previously impenetrable
industries. Succeeding in this new business landscape requires cohesive teams, and
cohesive teams thrive on soft skills.
THE TAKEAWAY
Soft skills are no longer “nice-to-have” skills; they are “need-to-have” skills.
Succeeding today means building a set of soft skills. For many, the best first step is
to focus on a core set of soft skills to make the approach manageable. Business is
about building and marinating relationships – and relationships are about soft skills.

HARD DATA MAKES THE CASE FOR SOFT SKILLS
Adam Medros is president and chief operating officer at edX, overseeing the day-to-day
management. He serves on the board of directors of Wordstream and was previously chairman
of the board of the Massachusetts Innovation & Technology Exchange (MITX).
While the U.S. Labor Department has reported a growth in jobs in 2019, we still have
a long way to go to close the skills gap and set our workforce up for success in
today’s rapidly changing economy. As technology continues to revolutionize the way
we work, success and mobility in the workforce will be determined by a new mix of
skills. For businesses looking to retain and retrain employees while maintaining their
competitiveness, there is a refined set of skills they cannot overlook.
Employer emphasis is often on developing hard skills, like computer science and
data science, but it’s critical not to discount the importance and marketability of soft
skills. Burning Glass Technologies, in partnership with the Business-Higher Education
Forum, examined 150 million job postings to determine the skills employers are
seeking in today’s job market. They found that three key categories of skills, which
they dubbed the “New Foundational Skills,” will be essential to job mobility and
success as the labor market continues to evolve. Human skills – their term for soft
skills – weighed heavy and necessary for access to a wider pool of employment
opportunities.
“Critical thinking, persuasive writing, communications and teamwork

have shifted from nice-to-have to must-haves.”
TODAY’S IN-DEMAND JOBS REQUIRE SOFT SKILLS

Critical thinking, persuasive writing, communications and teamwork have shifted from
nice-to-have to must-haves. They’re hard-won and rigorously maintained abilities that
all employers value in today’s job market. In fact, Burning Glass’ report found that
human skills were requested for 60% of job openings in cities (of 600,000 residents
or more), compared to 47% of job openings nationwide. This finding indicates that in
large population centers, where pay is typically higher, having strong human skills is a
clear differentiator.
Corporate data backs up this story as well. In 2017, Google released the results from
an internal study that looked across its teams to identify the most innovative and

Hard Data Makes the Case for Soft Skills
productive groups within the company. It found that its best teams weren’t the ones
full of top scientists. Instead, its highest performing teams were interdisciplinary
groups that benefited from employees who brought strong soft skills to the
collaborative process. Further research revealed that important predictors of success
at Google are skills like good communication, insights about others and empathetic
leadership.
It’s not just tech companies that are finding value in these types of skills. A Twitter
poll by edX found that people think teamwork and collaboration are the most
helpful soft skills in the workplace, followed by critical thinking, public speaking and
persuasive writing.
THE EMPLOYER’S RESPONSIBILITY IN TRAINING AND DEVELOPMENT

As online courses and programs that teach and refine soft skills become more
prominent, it’s imperative that employers take advantage of these resources. With
competing forces, such as the skills gap, rising student debt and changing millennial
needs in the workplace, companies need to seriously think about how they can
engage their workforces by giving them continuous opportunities to grow their skills
in order to stay relevant and feel valued. This investment will increase employee
engagement and overall satisfaction.
Offering workers opportunities that help them build and improve their soft skills can
support greater retention and ensure that your workforce has the skills necessary
to be competitive. A relatively cost-effective way to do it is using e-learning that
enables employees to learn on the job while consuming high-quality, rich and
engaging course materials. With online programs, employees also have the flexibility
to both customize their learning while still having access to on-the-job training.
Having strong soft skills – especially when paired with equally strong hard skills –
makes for an in-demand, well-educated working professional. It’s a skill set that is
applicable to every industry and an L&D investment that makes good business sense.

WHY WE SHOULD START CALLING SOFT SKILLS
“EMPLOYABILITY SKILLS”
Dave Fogleman is the chief learning officer for SkillPath, a professional learning and
development provider located in Mission, Kansas. SkillPath leads more than 16,000 training
sessions each year for Fortune 1000 companies, major sports leagues, the U.S. Armed Forces,
federal government employees and more.
While job seekers are prepared to share their tangible knowledge and technical
abilities with potential employers, recruiters are increasingly interested in a job
candidate’s interpersonal skills. These behaviors indicate how a person will function
as an employee and fit into the company culture.
While soft skills like teamwork, communication, leadership, productivity and critical
thinking are widely required by employers, they are inconsistently taught in high
schools, universities and workplaces. When new hires lack the skills to write a
professional email, communicate with their manager or prioritize tasks, it creates
obstacles in the workplace.
Instead of presenting soft skills as desired qualifications of potential employees,

we should promote their value and require all potential and current employees
to develop and nurture them. In fact, when companies hire new personnel, these
“employability skills” should rank as high as technical aptitude. Here are some of the
reasons why.
TECHNOLOGY CREATES A DEMAND FOR PEOPLE SKILLS

Technological innovation can have a powerful effect on jobs. By 2030, according to
McKinsey, 44% of current work hours will be automated. Although some jobs will
be displaced, automation also creates new positions and modifies existing jobs. For
example, when ATMs were introduced in the United States, bank teller positions were
expected to become obsolete. However, competition among banks led to a need
for more tellers, but their roles had evolved. Instead of dispensing cash, tellers were
tasked with and trained in providing high-quality service to potential and current
clients.
In the future, rote activities will continue to be replaced by machines, and worker
responsibilities will shift. Employees will spend less time performing duties that can
be done better and more quickly with a machine and more time applying expertise to
solve programs, interacting with stakeholders, and managing and developing people.
By 2030, workers will need to increase their social skills, emotional intelligence and

cognitive capabilities, which will change how companies hire, educate and assess
their workforce.
As businesses embrace the benefits of automation, training the workforce for

redeployment will be essential. Mid-career job training will be necessary, but we
will need to adopt a new educational model. According to McKinsey, educational
and workforce training models have not fundamentally changed for 100 years.
Companies still use systems designed for an industrial society to prepare workers for
a knowledge economy. McKinsey suggests that through programs like the GI Bill, the
U.S. government can play a part in establishing programs to quickly reskill the labor
force, and businesses also can add on-the-job training through in-house programs
and education provider partnerships to upgrade their employees’ skills.
“By 2030, workers will need to increase their social skills, emotional
intelligence and cognitive capabilities.”
SOFT SKILLS TRUMP TECHNICAL TALENTS

Describing skills like communication, teamwork and leadership as “soft” promotes
the impression they can be trained and adopted with ease. While we can introduce
these skills in a classroom or through reading, they are often difficult for employees
to develop.
Soft skills are acquired through process and habit change, and they can require years
of practice, experience and feedback to master. While technical skills can get a new
employee’s foot in the door, the inability to interact and collaborate with others can
put limitations on his or her success.
It’s important for companies to continue developing their talent. Employers often
support the technical skills training to stay competitive, but soft skills development
ensures your employees remain relevant to the core values of the company, closes
the proficiency gap in the company’s workforce and keeps workers employable.
Today, many people recognize that soft skills are marketable abilities. Half of the
recent college graduates who responded to MindEdge Learning’s second annual
“State of Critical Thinking” survey said that soft skills are just as important as hard
skills in the workplace. Of those who said one or the other are more important, 31%
said soft skills are more important than hard skills. Each year, LinkedIn shares the

skills companies need most, which it determines by analyzing thousands of LinkedIn

job postings to determine the skills that companies are looking for and the demand
relative to their supply. In 2019, the list of top soft skills include creativity, persuasion,
collaboration, adaptability and time management.
Under Armour (UA) is one company that considers an applicant’s soft skills in the
hiring process. Brian Johnston, UA’s director of e-commerce engineering, said that
while hard skills are “an important facet of any candidate, we value ingenuity, passion
for technology and strong cultural identifiers far more.” Thinking big, inspiring others
and being a great teammate put job candidates on the right path.
YOUR LEADERS’ PEOPLE SKILLS REFLECT THE COMPANY CULTURE

Soft skills are not only vital to personal growth; harnessing emotions, leading
different personalities, handling rejection with grace, adopting self-discipline and
being empathetic are all traits of successful leaders. When leaders have highly
developed people skills, it shapes company culture.
Leaders use their behavior, communication and perspectives to create a positive

working environment. Instead of a command-and-control workplace, effective
leaders understand and cultivate an atmosphere of innovation, development, purpose
and coaching.
“Soft skills development ensures your employees remain relevant to the

core values of the company.”
According to Gallup, “70% of the variance between lousy, good and great cultures
can be found in the knowledge, skills and talent of the team leader.” When leaders
can improve their employees’ confidence, help them learn from failures and empower
them to reach their goals, it sets up an opportunity for a great company culture.
When managers incorporate soft skills into their leadership approach, employees
feel valued, they have a sense of acceptable standards, it helps them stay motivated
and their engagement with the company improves. When organizations function
well, they compete on a much higher level. For example, the Best Small and Medium
Employers in Canada study, produced by Aon Hewitt and the Queen’s School
of Business Centre for Business Venturing, ranked businesses on their employee
engagement scores. The study’s data shows that organizations with the most

engaged employees achieve 65% greater share-price increase, 26% less employee
turnover and 15% greater employee productivity.
“When managers incorporate soft skills into their leadership approach,

employees feel valued, and their engagement improves.”
Deloitte’s 2017 “Global Human Capital Trends” report states, “Ninety percent of
companies are redesigning their organizations to be more dynamic, team-centric,
and connected,” and their leaders are challenged with mobilizing and executing
these new models. As workplaces evolve, people will be at the front of new
method of operations. It only makes sense for companies to invest and develop the
employability skills of their people.

SOFT SKILLS — NOT TECHNICAL ONES — SHOULD BE THE FOCUS
OF UPSKILLING INITIATIVES
Jeremy Auger drives company-level strategy within D2L and provides executive leadership of
mergers and acquisitions, government relations and public affairs, corporate communications,
labs, IP strategy, and philanthropy. He is an advisor to the Government of Canada on future
skills and participates on a number of for-profit and nonprofit boards, including serving as
chair of the economic development advisory board for the City of Kitchener (Canada), a board
member for the IMS Global Learning Consortium and a national board member for ITAC –
Canada’s IT association.
The average half-life of a hard, technical skill is continually falling — now at only
about five years, according to D2L research — which means that if someone learns a
skill in the first year of college, it’s only half as useful when he or she graduates. That
figure has never been lower, and our culture of ongoing technological change is only
going to keep driving it down.
In fact, according to the World Economic Forum, 65% of the children entering school
today will graduate into jobs that do not even exist yet – and within a period of just
four years, more than one-third of the desired skill sets of most occupations will
be made up of skills that are not yet considered core to that job. Put another way,
Dell predicts that 85% of the jobs that the economy will need in 2030 haven’t been
invented yet.
Welcome to the 21st century.
Some people, like Klaus Schwab of the World Economic Forum, refer to our time
of relentless technological change as the Fourth Industrial Revolution. They believe
that this revolution is not progressing in a linear way like others before it; instead, it’s
evolving exponentially. From artificial intelligence (AI), machine learning and virtual
assistants to 3D printing and autonomous vehicles, the Fourth Industrial Revolution is
changing interactions and behavior across the workforce. In particular, the rise of AI
is driving certain jobs and their technical skills to extinction.
“The most valuable skills of the future will be the skills that are
uniquely human.”
On the other hand, we know that some skills are more lasting. Skills like leadership,
collaboration and communication are usually described as soft skills, but they should

be referred to as durable skills. These are the skills that, once you have them, you will
use for the rest of your life, in your work and in your personal life, day in and day out.
Who can predict what programming code language a smartphone platform will be
using in 20 years? Or 10? Or even four? It’s a technical proficiency we can’t reliably
teach yet. But knowing how to use that phone to express thoughts, ideas and
feelings are skills that never lose value.
In other words, the most valuable skills of the future will be the skills that are uniquely
human: creativity, empathy, flexibility, non-repetitive logic and entrepreneurship.
Much of our current systems of learning, however, do a disservice to those durable
skills — and a disservice to the employers of the future. In the same way that
traditional jobs are quickly being redefined in today’s market, our systems of learning
need to adapt to address the rising demand for durable skills and the need for
greater agility in adapting hard skills.
While stakeholders from education, the private sector and government understand
the need for and value of training and skills development, we need to develop a
framework for skills development for the Fourth Industrial Revolution. A recent white
paper on the importance of durable skills and the key role they will play in this new
world of work lays out some specific proposals:
• Placing greater emphasis on durable (soft) skills across the education
continuum.
• Creating easier opportunities for workforce re-engagement in the higher
education system.
• Increasing access to employer-based training opportunities.
• Increasing collaboration between employers and the higher education system.
• Government investment in and prioritization of workforce development.
• Creating three-way partnerships among government, higher education and
employers.
Doing this right is hugely important. In fact, the stakes couldn’t be higher. Our future
prosperity depends on it. Rather than focusing on the risk, though, let’s suppose
that we do it right. Let’s suppose we succeed in educating future generations with
durable skills. We will create a workforce that is every bit as literate in the skill of
adaptability as it is in C++ (or whatever its successor programming language will
be). We will have educated young people who are natural risk-takers, because

experience has taught them that failure is at least as instructive as success (and a key
component in the process of achieving success). We will have ushered in a world of
autodidacts who are moving from career to career over the course of their working
lives — happily and with relative ease — because they have learned how to be lifelong
learners — and, ultimately, because we succeeded in teaching them soft skills.

PLAYING HARD BALL WITH SOFT SKILLS
Dr. Theresa R. Horne, CPTM, is a self-proclaimed foodie (although vegetarian), novelist and avid
book reviewer who happens to be a training guru within the federal government.
Many employers underestimate the importance of soft skills until they learn about
a bad customer service experience, lose sales or try to manage a disgruntled
employee. Typically, companies with high sales are dedicated to hitting a home
run with a first impression and continuous relationship management. The impact
of an unhappy customer on the business can be detrimental, depending on the
customer’s social network. So, how do L&D professionals gain buy-in from leaders
and employees to play hard ball with soft skills?
According to a recent LinkedIn study, there’s a high demand for these 10 soft
skills: communication, organization, teamwork, punctuality, critical thinking, social
skills, creativity, interpersonal communication, adaptability and having a “friendly
personality.” We might look at this list and think that these topics should be
ingrained in employees by the time they arrive on the first day of their first job.
However, we know that great, innovative leaders are often not found along our own
personal career track. Just as good habits are learned, bad ones are often cultivated.
Continuously building training that encompasses a few soft skills is a wise decision.
“You can build soft skill training into most training programs.”
DO WE NEED TO GIVE DIRECT SOFT SKILL TRAINING?

Absolutely not. We know that leaders and employees often balk at the idea of taking
a training on having a “friendly personality” and feel that teamwork is a personality
trait instead of a skill to develop. Luckily, you can build soft skill training into most
training programs, since the soft skill itself is what enables employees to do a better
job in their technical duties. For instance, in a sales training geared toward increasing
sales through B2B relationships, including communication, organizational and social
skills may be beneficial to relationship management. Sometimes, the packaging of an
idea is just as important as the idea itself.
DO WE NEED FORMAL SOFT SKILL TRAINING?

Soft skill training can happen outside of the usual online, webinar or instructor-

Playing Hard Ball With Soft Skills
led platforms. Many companies use on-the-job training (OJT) as a quick, efficient
approach to soft skill training. For instance, managers at a credit card company
provided OJT training on voice tonality for their customer service representatives by
walking down the team line while reps were assisting customers on the phone. The
managers observed their voice, tone and body language and, after the call, provided
positive reinforcement and ideas for improvement on the spot. (Examples include,
“Smile when speaking to relay happiness over the phone” or, “Sit up straight in the
chair to sound more engaged.”) These efforts do not go unnoticed by the budding
workforce. In a 2015 labor analytics research study of millions of job announcements,
one out of three skills employers requested was a soft skill.
“The time to make a thorough effort on soft skills development for your
employees and leaders is now.”
All in all, the time to make a thorough effort on soft skills development for your
employees and leaders is now. The learning and development industry, coupled with
hiring statistics, demonstrate the importance of preparing employees to play hard
ball with soft skills.

SOFT SKILLS: THE CATALYST TO ACHIEVING
ORGANIZATION-WIDE CHANGE
Joseph Grenny is a four-time New York Times bestselling author; keynote speaker; leading
social scientist for business performance; and co-founder of VitalSmarts, a top 20 leadership
training company. For 30 years, he has delivered engaging keynotes at major conferences,
including the HSM World Business Forum at Radio City Music Hall.
As you scan the horizon of failed corporate change efforts, occasionally, you find
an organization that successfully implemented a massive and permanent shift in
behavior. Is the difference dumb luck, or can we learn from the best?
In an attempt to uncover the widespread resistance to change that we see behind

most failed initiatives, my partners and I interviewed leaders and teams who failed
despite massive investments in training and support. Next, we interviewed the teams
who adopted and aggressively implemented change initiatives. The message we
received could not have been more surprising.
The most startling finding was that both the successful teams and the failed teams
believed in the change and were convinced it was the right thing to do. Both
groups were highly persuaded by the merit and even the urgency of the measures.
Both groups also feared resistance to the change effort, worried about failure and
predicted the exact barriers they would face.
There was one key difference. Groups who were successful did two things others
couldn’t: They used two different skill sets, and they were social skills – soft skills.
Successful groups spoke openly about anticipated problems. They were masters
of what we call crucial conversations. They effectively talked about concerns and
barriers and thus created the social support needed for success.
Once people have discussed concerns and established plans, it’s time to implement
them. But what if people violate new processes and rules or behave in ways that are
incongruent with the philosophy behind a change effort? In top companies, people
know how to discuss broken promises, violated expectations and bad behavior – that
is, they are skilled enough to speak in the moment and face to face about problems.
They’re masters of what we call accountability conversations.
To clarify, in a crucial conversation, people work through their differences of opinion.

It’s about disagreement. In an accountability conversation, people deal with broken
promises. It’s about disappointment.

New policies, procedures and processes will never find a footing if employees violate
them without suffering consequences. In order for change initiatives to succeed,
people must know how to confront one another in an effective, direct and healthy
way. In short, they must be accountability masters.
WHY THESE SKILLS?

Now that we know the secret of successful organizations, let’s look at the application
of these best practices. Our research into resistant and receptive teams in Six Sigma
change efforts, for example, revealed five concerns people must resolve if they hope
to adopt and sustain Six Sigma practices:
• Upper management isn’t really committed.
• Some of my improvement ideas could be very threatening to others.
• My boss will never support this.
• My peers aren’t held accountable for supporting the effort.
• Other departments won’t cooperate.
Further, in the poorly performing teams, self-fulfilling prophecies replaced crucial

conversations. Since people concluded change efforts were a sham, they silently
withdrew their support. As they did so, the effort stalled, confirming their assumption
that it was a waste of time. Similarly, those who believed it would never work because
no one ever held their deadbeat peers accountable were so confident of their
conclusion that they didn’t bother expressing it. The result? Their colleagues were not
held accountable, and their suspicions were confirmed.
“Consistent application of crucial soft skills ensures the success of any

new and promising practice.”
Here’s why the ability to hold a crucial conversation is a key to success: To break
from this unhealthy cycle, people must find a way to surface, test and change their
conclusions – or they will act them out, with predictable consequences. They must be
able to honestly raise these five concerns and express their ideas so change can be
tailored to specific cultural dimensions and unique needs. And everybody – no matter
their background, education or expertise – needs to be able to speak and be heard.

In successful departments, when people encountered these five issues, they raised
their concerns. If they effectively held an accountability conversation, they influenced
the other person’s behavior. They also found that reality wasn’t quite as bad as their
conclusion. They’d discover, for example, that their boss was not uncommitted but,
rather, overwhelmed. What was important about accountability conversations was
that they often produced change both in the other person’s behavior and in the
initiator’s perception.
When all the ideas from a team surface, two things happen. First, the team
experiences synergy, and people build off each other’s input to make the best
decisions. Second, people act on those decisions with commitment and unity. In
short, when stakes are high, opinions vary and emotions run strong, change efforts
work best when people know how to hold crucial conversations and hold others
accountable.
The underlying principle is that any significant social change involves a redistribution
of power and resources and attention to priorities that aren’t in some leaders’ top
drawers. People will still take a look at what’s being asked of them and conclude
that bad things are about to happen, so they resist. Consequently, a change effort
is less likely to fail based on the technical merits of the project than on whether or
not “opinion leaders” are capable of dealing with the inevitable resistance. More
specifically, can opinion leaders (and, eventually, everyone) routinely employ two
important social skills: First, can they talk about and work through differences of
opinion (crucial conversations), and, second, once there are new standards, can they
deal with colleagues who don’t keep their promises (accountability conversations)?
Consistent application of these crucial soft skills ensures the success of any new
and promising practice. As you begin to implement these skills into your corporate
culture, how can you ensure that they don’t become the next “flavor of the month”?
We’ve seen two kinds of postscripts. We’ve seen organizations where leaders brush
aside their crucial skills, and, predictably, their change efforts flounder and eventually
fail. But we’ve seen even more cases where leaders develop and use their skills in a
way that profoundly, positively affects their leadership style. In these cases, there
may be both progress and backsliding, but when they continue to pay attention to
how they handle both crucial conversations and accountability discussions, they
enjoy significant and lasting change.

IN SALES, SOFT SKILLS DRIVE CUSTOMER EXPERIENCE
Jeff Seeley is CEO of Carew International, Inc.
Modern sales organizations are investing a large sum of time and resources in sales
enablement and customer experience. Essentially, these two trending sales priorities
represent the art and science of sales. Sales enablement focuses on sales growth
and process improvement through system-driven efficiencies. Customer experience
addresses the value, ROI and emotional satisfaction we deliver to customers. It
is important to recognize the distinction. While sales enablement software and
platforms have a supporting role in improving the customer experience, expecting
sales enablement alone to drive exceptional customer experience is a recipe for
failure. Soft skills (such as communication and relationship-building skills) and the
delivery of benefits (as defined by the customer) are the essential ingredients of
sales and the foundation upon which we build exceptional customer experiences.
There is a significant gap between what will positively drive your customer
experience and the benefits you seek from technology-driven sales enablement.
Technology can provide valuable data for road maps to success. It can improve
efficiency and response time, which certainly impact the customer experience. But
the customer experience is about more than improved efficiency. It is about the total
package you deliver. It includes how you make the customer feel, the degree to which
you drive success and ROI for the client, and the amount of trust and confidence you
cultivate in the process. None of these results is possible without extensive insight
and a strong relationship with the customer. Ultimately, sales professionals and their
soft skills will drive the customer experience – or not.
“There is a gap between what will positively drive your customer

experience and your technology-driven sales enablement.”
Consider Thomas Keller’s upscale Napa Valley restaurant, The French Laundry. The
establishment boasts a three-star Michelin rating and an average dinner price of
$350 per person, excluding wine. You’d better believe this business is all about the
customer experience. What experience warrants this price point? Quality and rarity
of the food and wine, exemplary service, exceptional atmosphere, and exclusive

In Sales, Soft Skills Drive Customer Experience
clientele. A shortcoming in any of these areas would undermine the entire customer
experience and the perceived value.
What if you splurged on dinner at The French Laundry and your server was
uninformed about the food and wine offerings, ill-mannered, uncommunicative,
or indifferent to your satisfaction? How much would you enjoy the experience or
tolerate the price tag? This void in the value proposition would ruin your customer
experience. Yet, in B2B sales, companies and sales professionals often do not
understand the impact that these soft skills can have on their customer experience
and their business. While an extreme example like The French Laundry helps illustrate
the point, exemplary communication and relationship-building skills are imperative
if sales professionals are to rise above the competition to deliver full value and an
optimal customer experience.
At the other end of the customer experience spectrum, contact marketing is causing
a great deal of counterproductive noise. Email has become the new cold call and
junk mail, all rolled into one. The average professional receives 121 emails daily and
considers almost 50% of them to be spam. In addition, 86% of professionals prefer
email for communication, and the average person sends about 40 emails per day.
While email has its place in conducting business, it is not a means to cultivate
customer relationships or to differentiate ourselves and our solutions to customers.
Companies are increasingly realizing the strategic value of differentiating themselves

with superior customer experiences and are putting in place resources, skills and
processes to facilitate success on this front. They cannot deliver a superior customer
experience without a strong and productive relationship with the customer.
What does that kind of relationship look like? It starts with communication – first and
foremost to understand and, later, to share insight, educate and influence. It includes
collaboration with customers to develop the best solutions as well as the ability to
hold high-level conversations and be interesting. It is a relationship that features
trust, credibility, rapport and respect. Also important is likability; even in a digital and
automated world, people still buy from people they like. These kinds of relationships
are built with interpersonal soft skills, which need to be part of the skill set of every
individual on your team.

THE SOFTEST SKILLS CAN LEAD TO THE HARDEST
BUSINESS NUMBERS
Paul Leone, Ph.D., is an organizational psychologist and consultant and author of “Measuring
and Maximizing Training Impact: Bridging the Gap between Training and Business Results”
(published by Macmillan in 2014). In his current role as a senior ROI consultant at Verizon, he
conducts impact and ROI studies for some of Verizon’s most critical training initiatives.
One day, a long, long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away from the training industry, I
picked up the phone and called my credit card company to speak with a customer
service representative about one of the charges on my bill. The conversation started
with a lazy, lackluster greeting from the rep, as if I were imposing or interrupting
something. As I discussed the erroneous charge and approached how to resolve my
issue, things only became worse. I didn’t feel that the rep was acknowledging any
of my questions or respecting my time. There was a lot of dead air, when I didn’t
know what the rep was doing, and when he did return with a few answers, they were
unfriendly, curt and dismissive. I was clearly inconveniencing him.
As my frustration grew, I thought to myself, “If this is what I have to endure for a few
simple answers, I might as well cancel this card now.”
So, I told him exactly that: “If this is what customer service is like, perhaps I’ll just
cancel the card altogether.”
In the back of my head, I thought, “This might snap him to his senses or, at least,
nudge him to escalate the call to a better rep.”
He then said, “OK, I’ll cancel your card.” Within 10 seconds, he informed me that my
last statement would be in the mail.
I hung up and thought to myself, “What the heck just happened?”
What happened was he just cost that credit card company thousands of dollars of
revenue, because he was having a bad day or was ill-equipped to handle a customer
demand. Whatever the reason, from a customer perspective, he didn’t demonstrate
the empathy, courtesy and concern I came to expect from a complete stranger in his
position.
I thought to myself, “Does this company know how powerful these customer reps
are?” As the faces, voices and gatekeepers of the organization, they can make, save
or break accounts with a few of the right or wrong words.

While this example is an extreme case of bad behavior that cost a company quite
a bit of money, I also thought, “What about all the smaller missteps that happen
thousands of times a day with thousands of customers all over the world?” These
mistakes aren’t the big ones where they screw up the call entirely but all the times
they chisel away at and erode customer loyalty. These instances occur when just
a little more empathy and courtesy could have tipped the scales and avoided a
negative impact or cancellation or when a few more polite words could have driven
up satisfaction, commitment and spending.
Even back then, before I worked in the training industry, I thought to myself, “What
a wonderful opportunity to move the needle just a little.” How amazing the results
would be for these companies if they just made their reps a little better at what they
do – if they just improved their soft skills a fraction, it could mean a whopping impact
to the bottom line. Sounds like a training opportunity, doesn’t it?
Fast forward two or more decades and a Ph.D. later, and I find myself doing some
actual case studies for some great companies to prove (or disprove) my hypothesis
about how training can impact the bottom line. Guess what? These big corporations
always knew these rep behaviors were important, but they didn’t know how
important, because they rarely measured the impact and ROI of their customer
service training programs. Let me tell you briefly about one of those studies, which I
conducted recently at Verizon.
The training we evaluated was a customer service training where representatives

attended a half-day program to develop their soft skills and improve the customer
experience. To measure and isolate the impact of the training, we tracked a group
of trained employees and a group of untrained employees (the control group) over
eight months, measuring their levels of improvement after training. We looked for
improvement in metrics like these:
• Repeat calls (where the rep doesn’t resolve an issue the first time, so the
customer needs to call back).
• Customer satisfaction scores (after call survey).
• Disconnects (where customers decide they want to stop their service).
The final results showed that repeat calls decreased by 2%, satisfaction increased by
4% and disconnects decreased by 1%. All these monetized benefits of the training,
compared to cost of the training, meant an ROI for the program of 224%.

I share this example as one of many. We all might know soft skills are important,
and our instincts are telling us they can have a profound impact on the bottom line,
but without studies like this one, we can’t actually prove it and show how great
the impact is. By putting some rigor around research and measuring the impact of
training, we can all stop speculating, like I did on that customer service call, and start
putting real numbers in front of real business leaders to demonstrate how much
happier they can make their customers and how much more money they can make
with the right training. Perhaps if I had called a trained employee all those years ago, I
might still be spending money on that card today.

CHAPTER 3
SOFT SKILLS TRAINING PRACTICES

GO AHEAD — FORGET SOFT SKILLS
Diane Bock is a senior consultant at global leadership consulting firm DDI and is passionate
about helping organizations drive business results through people.
Sometime in the last year, a post on LinkedIn caught my attention. An HR manager

was seeking opinions on how to handle a brilliant cancer researcher who was
creating a toxic work environment for his colleagues. This prominent scientist was
a destructive bully … who just might cure cancer. He was literally making people
emotionally and physically sick in order to help people not be sick.
What to do?
Some people responded that nothing could be done. This researcher’s special talents
entitled him to lord his egomania and dysfunction over people (short of breaking
the law). Others said that there are psychologists and coaches who could help
address this situation to everyone’s benefit. What was really at issue was the lack of
managerial courage on the part of the executives, who were cowed into complicity.
Many suggested that chances for success of the cancer research would greatly
increase in a work environment of respect rather than tyranny.
It’s an extreme example, but it speaks to a situation that is common when new
people are hired: Managers tend to give lower priority to the skills that enable a
person to interact effectively and harmoniously with others. Although study after
study shows that soft skills significantly boost business results, hiring for soft skills
often gives way to acquiring prized technical or hard skills. This phenomenon applies
to many job categories, not just engineers, data scientists and cancer researchers.
But I’m not here to talk managers out of hiring based primarily on technical chops.
Many soft skills can be developed through training, especially for people who
are early in their career or in their first leadership job. The problem is that many
companies wait a long time to develop people’s soft skills, if they do it at all. On
average, it takes four years for new managers to receive leadership training.
The good news is, it’s not difficult to learn communication techniques and
behaviors to collaborate, coach, listen, demonstrate respect, express understanding
and empathy, create an inclusive and engaging environment, and build trusting
relationships, just to name a few.

The reason so many of these soft skills are developable is because they are largely
about the words used when speaking with others — words people already know.
Consider the difference between saying, “Help me to understand what concerns you
about this change” and saying, “We are making this change whether you like it or
not.” Which one would you rather hear? With practice, most people can learn to use
phrases that encourage rather than undermine productivity and good relationships.
The key is to make sure that training implementations are timely and designed in
a way that will truly change behavior. Telling people they need to be nicer or more
collaborative doesn’t work. Effective training requires a few things:
• Skills are relevant to the job.
• Skills are clearly defined in a way that is behavioral and observable.
• Good use of the skills is demonstrated during training.
• Learners have a chance to practice and receive feedback.
• The practice happens in a safe environment, starting with scenarios that are less
challenging than real life can be.
• Feedback must be specific to the skills being practiced rather than the ability to
solve a problem.
There are some soft skills you might safely, but temporarily, “forget” when hiring
for specific, hard-to-find knowledge or technical skills. The notion that we can fill all
positions with perfect candidates is wishful thinking. To meet the ever-increasing
challenges of hiring talent, we must make tradeoffs. However, to avoid costly and
embarrassing hiring mistakes, you need to apply some science to this calculation.
Managers need to know which soft skills are actually critical to the work, which are
developable, and which are nearly impossible to change in a person after he or she is
hired. For example, skills that are hard to train include:
• Adaptability
• Ability to learn
• Conscientiousness
• Innovation
• Authenticity
• Initiative

Skills that you can teach include:

• Communication
• Coaching
• Collaboration
• Leading teams
• Building trust
• Demonstrating respect
The difficult-to-develop examples are more about attributes than skills. If any of
these qualities are necessary to do the job, it’s best to hire someone who comes with
them.
Finally, consider whether or not the job in question demands that both soft and hard
skills must be in place beforehand. For example, Nasa’s job requirements start with
the hard skills, such as a science degree and “1,000 hours of pilot-in-command time
in jet aircraft.” But soft skills like communication, listening, teamwork and emotional
intelligence are considered equally essential.
“Many soft skills can be developed through training, especially for people
who are in their first leadership job.”
When we think of the problems caused by people who lack soft skills, stories like the
bullying cancer researcher captures our attention. Less obvious, but more common,
is the co-worker who is overly critical, the supervisor who doesn’t listen or rarely
gives a compliment, the service rep who is rude to customers, the meeting leader
who doesn’t clearly convey the meeting purpose, or others who don’t realize when
they are being insensitive or inappropriate.
Hiring people with perfect soft skills? Sometimes, you really can forget about it — as
long as you help people develop the relevant skills once they’re on the job. Achieving
business success without a workforce that can apply effective soft skills? Forget
about it.

WHY ARE SOFT SKILLS SO HARD?
Barb Opyt has been a learning solution architect with Caveo Learning since 2015. She has
extensive experience working in a variety of roles using her expertise in both instructional
design and learning and development.
Most organizations recognize the need to train new employees with the technical
skills they need to perform their jobs: how to use equipment, perform work tasks or
complete complex procedures, for example. While these “hard” skills are fundamental
to an employee’s performance, industry research and surveys show that employers
more often have concerns about gaps in employees’ so-called “soft” skills. Some of
the most important soft skills that today’s employers desire are:
• Teamwork and collaboration
• Oral and written communication
• Analytical reasoning and critical thinking
• Complex problem-solving
• Agility and adaptability
• Ethical decision-making
When a performance gap exists, it is up to the leadership team to recognize the gaps
and partner with the learning and development team to explore ways to fill them.
But all skill gaps aren’t equal when it comes time to address them. Why is it easier to
develop new hard skills, such as a new procedure or task, than it is to develop a new
soft skill, such as active listening?
Here are five key challenges to soft skills programs and how to overcome them.
1. SOFT SKILLS ARE HARD TO MEASURE.

It’s easy to know when a learner has mastered a skill such as how to use a software –
you ask them to do the task, and they perform it. You can use quantitative measures
for these skills. Creating assessments for a soft skill like time management is just as
important but more nuanced and contextual.
Overcoming the challenge: When developing training for soft skills, focus on
scenario-based knowledge checks; role-plays; and other context-based, qualitative
measurements of learning. For example, you could provide managers with a checklist
of observable behaviors to look for in employees.

2. HARD SKILLS TRAINING CAN BE “ONE-AND-DONE.” SOFT SKILLS TAKE

REPEATED EFFORT.
For any training program, follow-up and follow-through are key to making a lasting
change in behavior. For soft skills, such as leadership skills, real growth will only occur
after repeated practice, feedback from others and much reflection.
Overcoming the challenge: Rather than building a short-sighted training event,

create a long-term learning program. For example, plan opportunities to reinforce
and extend the learning over the course of a year with incentives for continuing to
participate, rather than expecting the change to happen overnight.
3. SOME SKILLS ARE HARDER TO LEARN THAN OTHERS.

While almost anyone can learn certain hard skills, such as computer programming,
developing soft skills can feel nearly impossible – but it’s not. Shy people can develop
themselves into powerful public speakers. It happens all the time.
Overcoming the challenge: Motivation to change is key to developing soft skills that
are not a natural part of an individual’s personality. Soft skill training programs must
include a strong, clear “what’s in it for me?”, also known as the “WIIFM.” If learners
understand that by developing the soft skill, they will further their personal aims and
goals, they can learn anything.
“Motivation to change is key to developing soft skills that are not a

natural part of an individual’s personality.”
4. YOU CAN TEACH SOMEONE TO FISH, BUT YOU CAN’T TEACH THEM TO ENJOY
FISHING.
Hard skills such as balancing an accounting ledger do not depend as much on
learners’ personality traits. Developing soft skills (like relationship-building) requires
understanding themselves, seeing the need for change, having a desire to change
and developing the new habits that solidify the change.
Overcoming the challenge: Never rush into soft skills training. Learners must decide
for themselves to change, learn and develop new habits. They may not like it at first,
but once they commit to the change and practice, the new skill will take hold.

5. IT’S NOT ABOUT YOU; IT’S ABOUT ME.

Soft skills such as communication skills are deeply rooted in people’s personalities
and are related to their habits and life experience. Without an understanding of self
and how experience influences habits and soft skills, learning could make participants
feel inauthentic and fake.
Overcoming the challenge: The best way to learn a soft skill is to be a part of a team.
Working with leaders or other experts who can model the skill helps learners see
what “good” looks like in action. It also offers opportunities to practice and receive
feedback. Rather than trying to force-feed soft skills training, provide experiences
where individuals can learn through observation and practice over a period of time,
receive periodic feedback, and reflect on their learning and development.
“The best way to learn a soft skill is to be a part of a team.”
As you think about increasing your organization’s ability to master soft skills,
consider the importance of motivating the learners by showing a WIIFM; including
modeling, practice, feedback and reflection in activities; building in ways to measure
success; and reinforcing training over time. You’ll soon find that soft skills aren’t as
hard as you thought they were.

THERE IS NOTHING “SOFT” ABOUT DEVELOPING LEADERSHIP
SKILLS: A COACHING PROCESS THAT WORKS
Sam Shriver is the executive vice president of The Center for Leadership Studies.
I am at a stage of life where I find myself wondering about things. (I call it

“wondering” … others might go with “obsessing.”) Here’s an example: Who was the
first person to coin the term “soft skills” and then, somehow, convince others that
leadership training fit neatly under that umbrella?
I’m sure someone supplied some self-serving rationale distinguishing hard science
from probability science, but philosophically, I side with Chris McLean (master trainer
for The Center for Leadership Studies) who has said for years, “Leadership skills are
really and truly the absolute hardest skills!”
Marshall Goldsmith and many other elite thought leaders in the theory of effective
influence would wholeheartedly agree. In so doing, they would shine a bright light
on the critical distinction between understanding the dynamics of leadership and
delivering results as a leader. Marshall has spent decades working out the kinks on a
coaching process he and colleagues Chris Coffee and Frank Wagner developed. In
general terms, here’s how that process works:
“Frequent coaching targets for leaders are listening, empowering,

collaborating and providing clear direction.”
THE PLAYERS
The coachee is the person who is asked to demonstrate commitment to building a
leadership skill. The term “demonstrate” is key; in overly simplistic terms, the coachee
must value the prospect of becoming a better leader and recognize that migration
takes time, effort and energy. Internal or external, the coach is the person who will
guide the coachee as they implement what they have learned in leadership training
and/or from feedback they have received.
The next-level manager (NLM), the coachee’s manager, must, among other
things, sign off on the coaching process, the skill the coachee has identified for
development, and the stakeholders who will play a critical role in helping the coachee
achieve his or her targeted goals.

There Is Nothing “Soft” About Developing Leadership Skills: A Coaching Process That Works
The stakeholders are the peers and direct reports of the coachee who will formally
and informally guide the process. Stakeholders will be asked to provide specific
feedback and “feedforward” to the coachee for the duration of skill development, and
in the final analysis, they will be the people who assess the degree of the coachee’s
improvement.
THE PROCESS
There are several mechanisms that organizations can leverage to identify a target, or
developmental focus, for the coachee (e.g., data from company 360s, interviews with
the coach, etc.). Spoiler alert! The behavior identified will be a shock to absolutely no
one! It goes back to the fundamental disparity between leadership knowledge and
leadership skill: Understanding it is one thing; doing it is altogether different.
Frequently identified targets for leaders at all levels include listening, empowering,
collaborating, providing clear direction and matching the leadership approach to the
needs of followers.
“At both the midpoint and culmination of the coaching engagement, the
coach distributes confidential assessments to stakeholders.”
When the target leadership behavior has been established, the coach and the
coachee have a meeting with the NLM to establish expectations. The express
purpose of the meeting is to ensure alignment on:
• The behavior: Is this the best use of the coachee’s time?
• The stakeholders: Moving forward, what combination of peers and direct
reports would be the best catalysts for skill development?
• The contracted responsibilities of the coachee: These responsibilities include
soliciting feedback and feedforward from each stakeholder on a preset and
recurring basis and active participation in regularly scheduled skill development
sessions with the coach, for the duration of the coaching engagement.
The coach and the coachee then schedule a brief meeting with the extended
stakeholders to ensure everyone understands and buys into what he or she will be
asked to provide the coachee and the coach moving forward – in other words, the
structure and management of the coaching arrangement.

There Is Nothing “Soft” About Developing Leadership Skills: A Coaching Process That Works
To the coachee, they will provide feedback and feedforward once per month
on the behavior selected for development, and they need to be aware that their
documented accounts for the targeted behavior will drive monthly discussions
between the coach and the coachee.
• Feedback: How, specifically, has the coachee improved or regressed in the last
30 days?
• Feedforward (a term attributed to Marshall): What specific suggestions do you
have for the coachee to improve in the next 30 days?
To the coach, stakeholders will provide specifics on how the coachee could improve
on the behavior selected and two formal assessments of the coachee’s progress (or
lack thereof) on the targeted behavior. The coach will synthesize stakeholder input
through a daily check sheet of sorts (i.e., “Do more of this, and do less of this.”).
At both the midpoint and culmination of the coaching engagement, the coach
distributes confidential assessments to the stakeholders. These assessments gauge
the degree of documented improvement the coachee has demonstrated in the eyes
of his or her stakeholders for the targeted leader behavior.
At this juncture, you might find yourself wondering a bit, as well…
HOW LONG DOES THIS PROCESS TAKE?

The training part of it? Ballpark between two and five days with intermittent content
refreshers. The behavior change part? A calendar year. You can certainly identify
positive trends in six months (perhaps less), but for those trends to be locked in and
sustainable, the recommended timeline is one year, with formal measurement at six
months and at least one coaching session, driven by stakeholder input, every 30
days.
IS IT WORTH IT?
There’s no way in the world a person who does leadership training can answer that
question objectively. Perhaps it’s better to redirect the question and end by saying
that there is nothing “soft” or easy about it. But, I wonder how much better your
organization would be if key people in critical roles up and down your chain of
command routinely demonstrated leadership competency?

CURATING THE SOFT SKILLS: 4 STEPS TO GET STARTED
Michael J. Noble, Ph.D., is chief operating officer and chief learning strategist at TTA.
Of all the challenges faced by learning leaders, the challenge of choosing the right
soft skills training can be especially difficult. To begin with, it involves different
decisions and processes from, say, instructional design or training delivery. Many
learning leaders come with a background in evaluating instructional needs, but they
may not be equipped as buyer and evaluators of content. And, unlike other training
initiatives, for which the source expertise already exists in house, they may be looking
outside the organization at premium content providers.
It’s in this outside search where learning leaders can face options overload,
induced by the recent proliferation of soft skills products and services on the
market. Contributing to this overload is more and better research on certain soft
skills – certainly more than was available when many of the tried-and-true vendors
originally developed their content libraries. There has also been a growing interest
in neuroscience and crossover applications of that research to leadership, creativity
and personal effectiveness. Finally, the context for making this complex decision can
have high stakes. Often, this content touches on the leadership philosophy of the
organization or on other key aspects of the culture. When this is the case, options
overload can become paralysis.
So, do you need to be an expert in leadership to choose the best leadership training?
To choose a course on design thinking, do you need to be a master? Of course,
our experience and background contribute to how we make decisions, but most
would agree that a generalist can make informed buying decisions without being
an expert in a specific soft skill. In such cases, the expertise required is in curation.
Unfortunately, the process and approach that a learning leader uses to vet and
select soft skills content is not as widely discussed or as widely accepted as other
benchmarks in our discipline. Also, when we talk about curation in our industry, we
are often focused on micro-curation of in-house and found resources.
With that in mind, here are four steps to consider when curating soft skills training.
1. DEFINE THE OBJECTIVES AND EXPECTATIONS

This step requires a pivot from conventional thinking about objectives. Of course,

starting with some sort of learner needs analysis will be valuable, but, in this case,
you must also look more broadly at the organizational goals and the goals of key
stakeholders and sponsors. For example, knowing that learners need help in leading
change is valuable, but there are several, very different options for accomplishing
this objective. Defining learner objectives, while foundational, won’t provide enough
of the criteria you need to make a good decision. That criteria should also include
factors such as these:
• Organizational culture and aspirations.
• Management buy-in.
• Awareness and perceived value of market offerings.
• Cost parameters.
• Analysis of the design and delivery requirements.
Drafting a document that outlines the proposed selection criteria can be critical to
explaining the reasons behind your recommendations later in the process.
“Think about the types of curation activities that will be most relevant in
giving you the information you need.”
2. DETERMINE METHODOLOGY
Curation is more than making a choice. It’s the art of how you make that choice. After
determining the criteria for evaluation, it’s helpful to think about the types of curation
activities that will be most relevant in giving you the information you need. Here are a
few types of curation that may be relevant to soft skills training:
• Searching is the full scope of how you will find information. It’s important to
think outside of web searches, although they will inevitably be part of your
search.
• Indexing brings together what’s available into an easily searchable list and may
begin to introduce filters or ranking systems.
• Summary is a tool for pulling out core messages and concepts.
• Combination is the mashup of ideas from different sources.
• Sequencing creates a linear narrative of the information. Consider whether
chronology is important from a content or a learner perspective.
• Selection is the iterative process of working from many to few.

It’s also worth noting that some of these activities may be enabling activities that you
do during the curation but never present to your audience.
3. CREATE A CURATION PLAN

After defining your curation criteria and methodology, it’s helpful to revise or
formalize your plan. In addition to the first two steps, a good plan likely outlines the
following tasks:
• Conduct stakeholder interviews.
• Conduct end user focus groups.
• Gather available options.
• Apply criteria and rate options.
• Present recommendations.
If you are working with an executive sponsor, be sure to review the curation plan,
including the evaluation criteria and curation methodology, prior to continuing.
4. SHOW YOUR WORK

Helping stakeholders and learners understand the “why” behind your choices around
soft skills training can help the organization accept ideas. People have a natural bias
against new information that comes from the outside, and showing (in a concise,
engaging manner) your work helps give it credibility. Although we designate certain
types of content as soft, we want learners to appreciate the rigor of our curation and
our selected training. Formalizing the “why” will also help to ensure the longevity
of the program, as soft skills training can often be in or out of favor depending on
factors such as changes in leadership.
FINAL THOUGHTS
Think deliberately about the choices that you make with respect to soft skills. By
using a sound process of thought prior to action, the result will be better received
by the organization and likely have a greater impact. Consider, for example, the
decision of whether to go with premium content, stock content or custom content.
Most organizations make that decision largely on the basis of cost: “What can
we afford?” instead of, “What do we need?” The job of the soft skills curator is to
comprehensively understand the organization’s and learners’ needs well enough
to make meaningful recommendations. The curator then has the responsibility of
helping everyone see the context and rationale for those recommendations.

3 STEPS IN CLOSING THE BEHAVIORAL (SOFT) SKILLS GAP
Ian Stewart is the executive director of learning and design at Kaplan Leadership & Professional
Development. He has more than 25 years of experience with leadership development in the
public and private sectors, including running the behavioral science department at the U.K.
Royal Military Academy.
The term “soft skills” is commonly used, but it is more accurate to define these skills
as part of the behavioral skills that are needed in the workplace that are no less
important than “hard skills” (technical skills) and, sometimes, that are more difficult
to master.
Kaplan Leadership & Professional Development recently surveyed more than 800
workplace professionals with supervisory responsibility and found that the No. 1
challenge in hiring and developing entry-level employees is finding new hires with
strong communication/people skills.
Jeff Weiner, CEO of LinkedIn, also identified these behavioral skills as the largest
skills gap in the U.S. After LinkedIn analyzed 940,000 job listings, he told CNBC,
“Interpersonal skills is where we’re seeing the biggest imbalance.” Weiner’s claim
echoes the 2014 U.K. National Employer Skills Survey, which found that 15% of
organizations reported skills gaps, between one-third and two-fifths of which were in
soft skills.
This challenge presents a great opportunity for the learning function to prove its
value to the business. In order to seize that opportunity, there are a few matters to
consider; most importantly, while there will be a demand to provide more training,
it will most likely be have to be without incurring additional cost. With that in mind,
here are three steps to address behavioral issues involving the communication/
people skills problem.
1. RECOGNIZE THE BREADTH AND DEPTH OF THE GAP

There is evidence (for example, see Jean Twenge’s book “iGen”) that suggests
while members of Generation Z are entering the workforce with a host of digital,
social media and other skills, they may be without some of the interpersonal skills
their parents’ generation entered the workplace with. Some of these skills are basic
to navigating the social interactions that make up the workplace – working with
different generations, correctly setting the tone and tenor of client interactions,
projecting the professional demeanor, etc.

These skills gaps are by no means impossible to fix, but they need attention during
the onboarding process through the personal customization, social visibility and
approval that have characterized this generation’s experience outside of work.
“Soft skills need attention during the onboarding process through

personal customization, social visibility and approval.”
Developing these skills is not just an issue for people entering the workforce. Looking
through the other end of the generational lens, the digital age demands that the
baby boomers work on their skills, too. For example, effective interpersonal skills
in the 21st century extends to managing your digital footprint across social and
professional media platforms.
2. ACCEPT THAT THE AGE OF THE ENTHUSIASTIC AMATEUR IN THE LEARNING

FUNCTION IS OVER
Managing the development of behavioral skills now needs greater rigor and
professional understanding. Budget constraints mean that the learning the training
function provides must be supported by the best evidence available. This may mean
slaughtering some of the “sacred cows” of L&D and replacing the folk psychology
that underpins much of professional learning with evidence-based learning science.
For example, there are vast training spends on popular psychometrics instruments
with no evidence of validity.
The need for greater rigor is even more important in terms of how organizations
deliver learning. When time is limited and the means of delivery are changing,
there is a greater need for learning professionals’ work to be informed by current
understanding rather than by intuition or “common sense.” For example, while much
learning makes a virtue of being easy, the reality is that an element of discomfort is
necessary in order to learn. Indeed, when learning is harder, it’s stronger and lasts
longer (see Peter Brown, Henry Roediger and Mark McDaniel’s book “Make It Stick:
The Science of Successful Learning”). Equally, while organizations often place an
emphasis a learner’s need to reflect, which is good and necessary, as humans, we are
poor judges of when we are learning well and when we are not. Therefore, learners
need coaching and mentoring in addition to their self-assessment.

3. PREPARE YOUR L&D SPECIALISTS OF TODAY TO BE THE LEARNING

ARCHITECTS OF TOMORROW
Developing effective interpersonal skills takes time. As an L&D professional, you know
that learning is a process, not a performance. Learners need to access the personal
motivation to learn, to input new insights and learn new skills. They need to scaffold
upon existing knowledge, and, most importantly, they must put their learning to work
to apply and embed it in the workplace.
Of course, this type of learning sounds like a tall order, for vast numbers – with a
large bill attached. Faced with similar problems in the past, L&D has turned to the
learning management system (LMS) to offer the solution. With a few exceptions,
however, they have failed to deliver, most with low levels of engagement and
unproven efficacy, despite the significant financial investment they entailed.
Furthermore, the LMS has dealt in online technical or content-based training rather
than behavioral skills.
“The challenges facing the workplace require a new kind of

learning professional.”
The next generation of LMS will be a learning ecosystem that uses best practices
in learning design to connect and choreograph online learning with workplace
applications and one-to-one coaching. This approach will democratize learning
by offering customized learning that provides both the scale required across the
enterprise and the personalized element that is crucial to engaging the individual.
It is learning that works in the context where it is applied. But it will require learning
architects who can envision and create the best solution for their business.
The issue of interpersonal skills training is another example of the challenges facing
the workplace that require a new kind of learning professional – informed by learning
science, able to use technology to create effective learning, and able to use the
tools of learning governance to evaluate progress and track costs. It may seem like a
daunting ask, but nothing less will do if L&D is to close this behavioral skills gap and,
more importantly, implement learning solutions that are scalable, impactful and cost-
effective.

COACHING: LEADING, ONE PERSON AT A TIME
Colonel (retired) Donna Brazil, Ph.D., is a 1983 graduate of the United States Military Academy
at West Point, a 31-year career Army officer and a professional coach who is now a faculty
member with Thayer Leader Development Group.
According to the U.S. Army Field Manual No. 6-22, “Leadership is the process of
influencing people by providing purpose, direction and motivation while operating to
accomplish the mission and improve the organization.”
The last phrase of this definition, “improve the organization,” is a critical and
somewhat unique aspect of the way the U.S. Army approaches leadership. Simply
put, it is not enough just to influence followers to accomplish a mission; true
leadership must include improving the organization – most often, one soldier at a
time. This focus on individual development in pursuit of organizational improvement
starts on day one of basic training and continues throughout a career.
Like the Army, many successful organizations differentiate themselves with this dual
focus on mission accomplishment and individual development. An integral piece of
that development is the coaching that leaders receive along the way.
When creating a development plan with their subordinates, leaders in the Army often
begin with an assessment of strengths and areas for development. Then, the leader
and subordinate together agree on a challenging or stretch assignment that will
enable the individual to develop in the desired capacity. Providing the individual with
the required support for undertaking this challenge, often in the form of resources
and coaching, is an important part of the leader’s responsibility.
In a perfect world, leaders would individually coach all their direct reports. However,
coaching takes time and practice, and subordinates are sometimes hesitant to
openly share all the challenges they are experiencing. While some leaders are skilled
at navigating these challenges, engaging the service of a professional coach, who
can dedicate time to the person and who does not have a role in their performance
evaluations, can address both concerns and benefit both the organization and the
person being coached.
I recently worked with a high-potential Army officer who was troubled by feedback
that he received as part of a 360 assessment. Through our coaching sessions, he
was able to step back from the feedback and identify two key areas where he

could use his strengths to remedy what some saw as a deficiency. Since I had no
evaluation authority for this officer, and we were relatively unconstrained by time,
he was comfortable addressing this negative feedback and was able to develop an
aggressive action plan and put it into motion.
The ever-increasing pace of the workplace, coupled with the accelerated promotion
and shorter tenure of many executives, has resulted in a generation of leaders who
rise to significant levels in an organization but find themselves with no peer network
when they arrive. In times gone by, the coaching role was often assumed by “elders”
in the “tribe” or organization. These individuals, outside the chain of command yet
with a history in the organization, provided different perspectives, helped acculturate
new leaders and helped set goals for their further development. Without these
coach-like elders, many executives feel isolated and unsupported as they navigate
their new positions, transitions or challenges alone. A professional coach can help fill
this void.
“In a perfect world, leaders would individually coach all their

direct reports.”
While they share some similar characteristics, coaching differs significantly from
consulting, counseling and mentoring. In each of these cases, an authority figure
brings his or her expertise to the table. Consultants and mentors are normally sought
when a person is looking for specific career-related advice or training. Professional
counseling is sought when a client seeks to better understand or resolve difficulties
from the past in order to move forward. In contrast, a coach rarely has expertise in
the specific business of the person being coached, does not delve into his or her
past and rarely gives advice. Instead, the coach is skilled at working alongside the
individual by asking questions that invite them to become more self-aware, focused
and deliberate in their action plans to develop and move forward.
As part of a holistic developmental program, Army leaders coach individuals by

walking them through a gap analysis to clarify their goals and develop a way ahead.
This methodology is appropriate in any organization for assimilating new leaders
and for assisting high-potential leaders in navigating their path ahead. In a typical
Army coaching engagement, the coach asks the individual to gather and analyze
information related to performance indicators, leader and team perceptions, and
opportunities for growth. They also ask the individual to look hard at their current

state and envision where they want to be in the future. Together, the coach and the
individual explore the areas for growth (i.e., the gaps) and develop a plan to test out
new behaviors that will move them closer to their goals.
Following up and gathering feedback is critical to this process. Sometimes, the new
behavior is effective; other times, it might feel wrong or be poorly received. Together
with the coach, the individual can explore why these results may have occurred and
develop a new plan to achieve the desired growth. Through this iterative process,
the person being coached develops not only new leadership skills but also a better
understanding of themselves and the people around them.
“Another ideal opportunity for coaching is immediately following an

intensive leader development experience.”
Another ideal opportunity for coaching is immediately following an intensive leader

development experience. The Army and many other organizations invest a good
deal of time and resources in leadership training and development, yet when it’s
conducted as part of a busy work schedule, many of the good ideas and the best of
intentions are waylaid upon return to the office. Coaching at this juncture can help
an individual develop a plan for implementing the lessons learned and for assessing
the effectiveness of their change efforts. The coach can provide a sounding board
to bounce ideas off of and serve as a “prodder” who will focus the individual on their
continued growth and help them to explore the many different perspectives and
opportunities in a situation. A coach can help the individual truly put the “action” into
his or her action plan.
Yes, leadership is about accomplishing organizational missions, but it is also about

improving the organization – one person at a time.

5 REASONS TO TAKE A HANDS-ON APPROACH TO SOFT
SKILLS TRAINING
As chief operating officer of Eagle’s Flight, Sue Wigston’s extensive senior leadership
experience and facilitation skills have established her as a trusted partner and organizational
development expert. She has a proven track record of successfully leading culture
transformation in Fortune 500 companies and has established herself as an authority on
training and development.
Although traditional training methods will always have their place in employee
learning, some things can’t be taught using simple knowledge transfer techniques.
Soft skills, such as communication, teamwork, accountability and problem-solving,
do require knowledge, but they are really more about action. The best way to
learn which behaviors are most effective in which situations is to try them out and
experience the outcomes in a safe environment. If you are considering implementing
soft skills training at your organization, here are five reasons to take a hands-on
approach.
1. EMPLOYEES LEARN BEST BY DOING

It’s rare that people can learn to ride a bike or speak a new language by watching
someone else do it or having it explained to them. So, why do we do try this way
for soft skills training? Using a hands-on approach to training soft skills (or “people
skills”), you’re adopting the form of learning that adults typically benefit from the
most. It allows people to learn by doing, practicing and engaging with the learning
content, and they can receive immediate feedback.
For example, perhaps your employees need communication training to hone their
written or verbal skills. It is difficult to learn how to be a better communicator
without actually practicing it. A hands-on approach allows your employees to change
a behavior or master a skill by practicing what they have learned in training in a
low-risk environment, where their confidence can grow and they can receive in-the-
moment coaching.
2. EMPLOYEES FIND IT MORE FUN AND ENGAGING

Although most people are motivated by the idea of developing their skills, the
process itself is sometimes boring. Experiential learning, a hands-on methodology
that is becoming increasingly popular, overcomes boredom by creating a detailed
and vivid experience that is fun and engaging. Research shows that fun and
enjoyment increase motivation to learn while boosting concentration and learning

retention. A positive immersive learning experience allows people to develop their

skills together and benefit from the immediate reward of seeing how those skills lead
to success. The hands-on approach is especially effective for team building, because
it can bring life to the training and encourage learners to engage with teammates
to improve their skills and performance – which ultimately translates to better
collaboration on the job.
“A hands-on approach allows your employees to grow their confidence

and receive in-the-moment coaching.”
3. A HANDS-ON APPROACH APPEALS TO ALMOST EVERY LEARNING

PREFERENCE
Learning is not a uniform process; people like to learn in different ways. For example,
some learners might be most successful after seeing a demonstration of the concept,
while others might want to talk about the concept and its theoretical basis. A
hands-on approach works for a variety of learning preferences, because it allows all
participants to connect with the content in the ways that are most meaningful to
them. For example, innovation or creativity training is more fruitful when learners can
engage with the material in the way that works best for them. Whether it’s discussing
the content, drawing it or critically thinking it through, the hands-on approach has
something for everyone.
4. EMPLOYEES LEAVE FEELING CONFIDENT AND EMPOWERED BY WHAT THEY

LEARNED
Although traditional training methods provide information, it’s rare that learners
can take that information back to the workplace and immediately translate it into
action. In contrast, a hands-on approach to soft skills training allows people to return
to work with new behaviors that immediately impact performance, because they
practiced them in training. Hands-on training incorporates complex work challenges
but removes the risk of experimenting with new behaviors on the job by using a
theme to mask the connection between the task at hand and the actual workplace.
This type of soft skills training is more likely to build the conviction needed to
actually change. Learners can leave training equipped with the tools, techniques and
action plans that enable them to apply their skills immediately and successfully back
on the job.

5. LEARNING CONTINUES BACK ON THE JOB

Not only is experiential learning fun, but the shared nature of the activities amplifies
their effectiveness and leads to conversation and continued learning long after the
training is over. Employees are excited to share their experience and knowledge,
which may inspire and engage other employees. This kind of momentum can make a
noticeable and measurable difference in the effectiveness of your soft skills training –
exactly what every training and development professional wants to see.
“Hands-on soft skills training improves learning retention and creates

lasting behavior change.”
A hands-on approach is a powerful way to approach soft skills training, because it

gives people the opportunity to not only learn but to apply and practice new skills
in a safe environment. Instead of passively listening to a presentation that they will
forget quickly, employees take an active role in their learning. Hands-on soft skills
training improves learning retention and creates lasting behavior change, leading to
an immediate impact on performance and ongoing improvement.

CHAPTER 4
SOFT SKILLS IN A DIGITAL WORLD

SOFT SKILLS TRAINING: TRENDS IN DIGITAL LEARNING AND
EMERGING TECHNOLOGIES
Danielle Hart is the director of marketing at SweetRush.
With the growth of organizations that identify their main asset as human capital, the
capability of knowledge-economy workers to communicate, collaborate and lead is
of heightened importance. This advancement has increased the demand for effective
leadership and soft skills training, customized to the organization’s needs and, ideally,
offering a relevant and personalized learning experience.
Providing learning programs that build empathy and foster emotional connections
among colleagues or between employees and customers are particularly on the
rise. “Design thinking has legitimized the need for empathy in making business
decisions,” explains Clare Dygert, director of instructional design at SweetRush.
While demonstrating empathy has always been an important area of personal and
professional growth, “what’s happened now is that there’s enough of a roar that
we’re hearing it,” says Dygert.
Digital learning and emerging technologies are offering new tools to teach soft
skills in powerful ways; gamification, virtual and augmented reality, and simulations
are just a few. Which tools are best for your learners will depend on your business
needs, your learners and their learning environment, and your budget and timeline.
Regardless, these trends are worth exploring as you look for new ways to surprise
and delight your learners and increase motivation, focus and retention through
engagement.
GAMIFICATION ENCOURAGES LEARNERS TO THINK ON THEIR FEET

One of the challenges with soft skills training – but not necessarily with technical
training – is that learners feel that “we already know this stuff” (e.g., how to
communicate with and serve others). After all, they do it every day. Yet, often, their
skills have room to grow, both for their personal and professional advancement and
for their organization to be more successful in the marketplace.
Organizations are using gamification to give learners a time constraint and approach
a situation by thinking on their feet. This approach mimics the real world, where
employees need to react quickly during conversations and customer interactions.

For example, imagine you are teaching your audience to spot nuances in body
language when having a difficult conversation with a colleague or a client by having
them clicking hot spots in an image. Using a short time period of only 10 to 20
seconds encourages focus and concentration. Building in the functionality to earn
points for each spotted item can increase motivation. And adding incorrect options
discourages learners from simply clicking all over the screen. These techniques,
which elevate the activity from a simple “click-to-reveal” activity, serve to increase
the urgency and significance of learning soft skills.
If building empathy is your objective, consider allowing learners to play roles other
than their own during the game. For example, a large technology company recently
used a board game to teach sales managers how to prioritize sales efforts over a
four-quarter sales cycle. Each player chose and adopted a role on the sales team
other than their own. An unexpected positive result was the empathy that players
gained for others on the team as they considered what was important to them. This
empathy fostered teamwork and leadership and added a soft skills component to the
sales training.
VIRTUAL REALITY FULLY IMMERSES LEARNERS IN ANOTHER’S SHOES

Virtual reality (VR) is a groundbreaking technology for soft skills and empathy
training. “It is as close to being in the real world, having a firsthand experience,
as we can possibly create,” says Mary Gannon, Ph.D., senior learning strategist at
SweetRush, about VR. With this technology, learners can actually walk in the shoes of
other people and experience the world through their eyes.
“Organizations are using gamification to give learners a time constraint

and approach a situation by thinking on their feet.”
For example, a large hotel chain recently implemented a VR learning program to help
hospitality workers feel what it’s like to be a guest experiencing a problem at a hotel.
Inside the headset, learners view situations through the eyes of a guest, observing
as hotel employees try to fix the problem in different ways with slight nuances.
Ultimately, the learners decide whether the actions by the employee made them feel
worse, the same or better about the situation. Being able to experience the problem
from the guest’s perspective enables hotel workers to develop empathy for the
guests. Experiencing how good it feels when the guest’s problem is dealt with in a

positive way further enhances this learning experience.
By blocking out all outside distractions and offering a high-quality visual and
interactive experience, VR enables learners to feel like they actually are in the
moment, which can increase both learning engagement and knowledge retention.
SIMULATIONS CREATE “AHA!” MOMENTS ABOUT THE COMPLEX CHALLENGES

OTHERS FACE
Online simulations have become another popular tool for building empathy. Like VR,
simulations can enable learners to experience life and work from the perspective of
another person. However, simulations can also include robust features that challenge
learners with complex, multilayered decisions and present the consequences of those
decisions, whether they’re positive or negative.
“Simulations can include robust features that challenge learners with

complex, multilayered decisions.”
For example, a leading financial institution recently implemented a simulation to help

professionals understand the challenges of owning a business. Throughout each
stage of the business’ growth, beginning with the start-up phase, learners make
decisions as a business owner, receiving advice from friends and colleagues along
the way. Each choice impacts investors and customers, leading to a thriving or failing
business. For professionals who have no experience owning their own business – and
yet who have many small business owners as clients – the simulation opens their eyes
to the constant and complex decisions their customers face.
AVATAR CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT MODELS FLAWS AND GROWTH

Avatars are by no means new to e-learning, but the new trend is that as storytelling
comes to the forefront as a powerful instructional design technique, avatars are
evolving through the stronger use of character development.
Here’s an example: A large food and beverage manufacturer wanted to transform

an enterprise-wide leadership training program from a classroom experience to an
online program without losing the emotional connection that learners experienced
in the classroom. To solve this challenge, the team created a cast of relatable avatar
characters with flaws and weaknesses – characters in whom learners could see

themselves and their own struggles. Throughout the program, course by course, the
characters learned and grew along with the learning audience, becoming almost like
family.
“AR can bring the gamified body language training to life through
3D avatars.”
AUGMENTED REALITY OFFERS NEW TOOLS TO SURPRISE LEARNERS

Augmented reality (AR) is typically thought of as a tool for technical training and
knowledge-based learning. The classic example is holding your phone or tablet in
front of an object and viewing additional information about it.
However, the possibilities for AR are wider than our initial conception of how to use
this tool – if you apply some creativity and out-of-the-box thinking. That approach
will yield a new kind of learning experience, one that will surprise learners and bring
new levels of engagement.
For example, AR can bring the gamified body language training to life through 3D
avatars. In this case, learners would point their phone at a physical card and see a
“customer” (a 3D avatar) in AR. The customer avatar would then display certain body
language, learners would choose the action they should take as the sales associate,
and the customer avatar would respond to that action in a positive or negative way.
Combined, it’s an interactive exercise with a touch of hologram, particularly engaging
for younger audiences.
With a rapidly growing tool kit for soft skills training, L&D professionals have
many new options for engaging learners, making powerful emotional connections,
optimizing critical communication and leadership skills, and building empathy.

ARE SOFT SKILLS THE KEY TO FUTURE-PROOFING YOUR
LEADERSHIP?
Dr. Alison Maitland is the director of research and product at Lane4, the experts in people
performance. She has over 25 years of experience working with and in blue-chip multinational
organizations, she holds a doctorate in organizational culture and relationships in elite sport
from Brunel University, and she is a Health and Care Professions Council-registered and British
Association of Sport and Exercise Sciences-accredited sports psychologist.
You don’t need a crystal ball to see that the world of work is changing. Everyone
knows about the numerous global megatrends, such as advancing technology and
artificial intelligence (AI), rising inequality, and political uncertainty, that are shaping
the future of work.
While these developments are often hailed as future trends, leaders can’t afford to
wait and see how they will affect the workplace before they adapt. They need to
act now. But with our research finding that fewer than one-third of C-suite leaders
feel highly equipped with the skills they need to be exceptional leaders in the future,
future readiness is proving to be a challenge.
“We may not know exactly which technical skills we’ll need in five years’
time, but soft skills will always be in demand.”
Fortunately, all is not lost. Leaders can prepare themselves for future challenges by
developing their soft skills.
We may not know exactly which technical skills organizations will need in five years’
time, but soft skills will always be in demand. Human psychology has evolved over
millions of years, so skills founded in behavior and interpersonal relationships will not
change drastically as the workplace continues to shift. Choosing to hone these skills
now means leaders will be fit to face the demands of any future environment they
may find themselves in. Below are three of the soft skills leaders can work on today
to ensure they are equipped for the future.
SKILL 1: STRATEGIC THINKING

Nearly half (47%) of C-suite leaders who responded to our survey believe that
strategic thinking is crucial to being an exceptional leader in the future. However,
many struggle to implement this skill in practice. Here are some ways leaders can
improve their strategic thinking.

Scheduling Time to Think and Explore Different Ideas

We consume an extraordinary amount of information on a daily basis, but how
often do we sift through and reflect on that information? Taking the time to analyze
information and think about it is key in order for leaders to notice changes in their
environment and spot opportunities.
Playing Devil’s Advocate

Being close to an idea or strategy can make it hard to spot its flaws. Great leaders
actively seek to interrogate and challenge their own thinking, whether by asking
themselves tough questions or by surrounding themselves with colleagues who have
a diverse range of opinions.
Thinking Long-term
Recent research into “Centennial organizations” (companies that have outperformed
their peers over the last 100 years) suggests that leaders who plan 20 to 30 years
ahead are more likely to achieve lasting success. Planning long-term goals may seem
counterintuitive in today’s rapidly evolving landscape, but getting used to thinking
more long-term is key for leaders who want to future-proof their business.
SKILL 2: RESILIENCE
Resilience is, was and always will be crucial to high performance, but surprisingly,
only 34% of C-suite survey respondents value this quality as essential to being a
great leader in the future. This finding suggests that leaders are underestimating the
importance of resilience, especially as multiple studies have found that the difference
between leaders who merely survive versus those who thrive is often their personal
resilience.
“The next few years won’t be simple sailing for businesses, and leaders
will need to be at the top of their game.”
Reframing pressure is one way to enhance resilience, because challenging situations

only become stressful if we interpret them that way. Understanding what is causing
the stress is also key, because otherwise, different stress triggers can build up and,
seemingly out of nowhere, tip us over the edge. Using performance intelligence —
the ability to identify the best course of action given their knowledge, understanding

of the situation, past experience and awareness of available resources — will enable
leaders to continue performing under high pressure.
SKILL 3: EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

Friedrich Durrenmatt famously said that “emotions have no place in business,
unless you do business with them.” Encouragingly, more people are recognizing
that emotional intelligence, or the ability to perceive, understand and manage the
emotions of yourself and others, is a fundamental element of great leadership.
Emotional intelligence represents leaders’ ability to engage their employees and

interrogate their own decisions. This skill leads to a more motivated workforce and a
more adaptable business — a key aspect of improving the long-term performance of
the organization.
Practicing empathy and self-awareness will improve leaders’ emotional intelligence.

Doing so requires leaders not just to listen to their colleagues but also to actively
encourage them to share their thoughts. It also means that leaders should take
responsibility for their actions while remaining optimistic and amiable. These
leaders will not only motivate their employees but also help them to build stronger
relationships with people around the business.
In these uncertain times, no one can predict what the future might bring, but
business leaders can prepare by developing these key skills. One thing that we can
be sure of is that the next few years won’t be simple sailing for businesses, and
leaders will need to be at the top of their game if they hope to succeed.

A SURVIVOR’S GUIDE TO STAYING RELEVANT, EVEN AS
TECHNOLOGY REVOLUTIONIZES WORK
Rory Sisco is a management consultant with a background in I/O psychology. As a solutions

manager at Mind Gym, he works with organizations to develop large-scale, global programs
that help individuals thrive at work.
The year is 2019, and the future isn’t quite what we thought it would be.
Don’t worry – this isn’t a scathing social commentary on the state of the world, just
a commentary on what 1980s cinema promised us. We don’t have the dystopian
cityscapes seen in the original “Blade Runner” (set in the year 2019) or the flying
hoverboards from “Back to the Future Part II” (set in 2015).
Still, today’s technology would likely make our world unrecognizable to the people of
the 1980s: smartphones, GPS and cloud computing – to say nothing of the coming
fleet of autonomous cars and drones.
There’s a lot of concern about what all this technology means for the labor market,
and with good cause. The more advanced artificial intelligence and machine learning
become, the more workers with seemingly stable jobs could become displaced or
redundant.
As a result, we have a choice: We can try to outperform machines, or we can

recognize that automation is forever changing the way that work is done. This choice
means finding another way to thrive in this new world.
“We can try to outperform machines, or we can recognize that

automation is forever changing the way that work is done.”
Here is your guide to navigating the rise of the machines.
SURVIVAL RULE 1: INVEST IN “HUMAN-TO-HUMAN” SKILLS

It’s often said that machines replace jobs, but in fact, machines replace tasks –
typically the repetitive ones. Think about the ATM. As automated teller machines
began appearing in banks, there was an immediate concern for the job security
of human tellers. In reality, the ATM freed tellers’ time for new responsibilities like
account sales and customer service.

A Survivor’s Guide to Staying Relevant, Even as Technology Revolutionizes Work
We’re seeing similar trends today as roles like auditors and contract lawyers are
replaced by programs that can review legal contracts faster and with greater
accuracy. Their employers are investing in skills training to pivot those employees’
roles into account managers and client consultants.
Effectively, automation is freeing people to take on more complex roles involving

attributes that machines can’t mimic, like a service orientation and emotional
intelligence. By investing in our human skills, we will continue to serve functions that
machines can’t replace.
“There’s a significant need for skills like problem-solving, adaptability and

the ability to communicate complex ideas.”
SURVIVAL RULE 2: DON’T JUST LEARN INFORMATION; LEARN TO ADAPT

Imagine you were alive in the year 1919, when many of the jobs we do today didn’t
even exist. Think of web developers, airline pilots, geneticists, podcasters, hedge fund
managers or digital marketers. Things change. Often.
According to a study from the World Economic Forum, while roughly 75 million jobs
will be replaced by machines by the year 2025, nearly 133 million jobs will be created
in data analysis, computer programming and service. It’s tough to predict the roles
that new technologies might create, but we already have a strong idea of the skills
that will be required.
While many roles will require technical skills like coding, there’s also a significant need
for skills like problem-solving, adaptability and the ability to communicate complex
ideas in understandable ways. Investing in these skills can help prepare you for the
future, even if you don’t know how your role will change.
SURVIVAL RULE 3: TAP INTO YOUR CREATIVE AND CRITICAL THINKING SKILLS
It’s been said that creativity is among the most fundamental of human qualities, a
unique and defining trait of our species. While computers can beat people handily at
chess, they aren’t particularly good at solving problems. Key skills like creativity and
complex critical thinking are tough for computers to replicate, which gives us another
edge over them.

A Survivor’s Guide to Staying Relevant, Even as Technology Revolutionizes Work
A computer will only do the things it’s been instructed to, so when faced with a
novel challenge, it will just run through everything it knows and then run out of ideas.
Computers also struggle to make grounded but subjective choices.
Your advantage is the ability to formulate creative strategies. It is a computer’s

limitations that make careers like learning specialists, sales managers and risk
evaluators relatively safe from elimination.
SURVIVAL RULE 4: BE PREPARED TO HAVE MULTIPLE CAREERS

Automation and AI are changing the landscape of work in meaningful ways.
Compare today’s manufacturing output with that of 1984 (the year “The Terminator”
premiered, incidentally). According to the U.S. Federal Reserve, the United States
produced twice as many manufactured goods in 2018 as it did in 1984, but did so
with one-third fewer workers.
No matter how safe we think our job might be, machines are rapidly changing the
labor market. Trends indicate that we’re likely moving from a single career to more
episodic career, marked by periods of work and transitions across industries. As
certain workforces shrink (particularly in industries like retail or manufacturing), the
HR and L&D staff that support them will shrink as well. L&D professionals might find
themselves moving between internal HR functions, into industries they’re less familiar
with or even into the growing gig economy.
So, how do we stay ahead of this disruption? The answer is continuous learning.
Long-term growth and development puts you in the best position to avoid the
irrelevance of leg warmers and lava lamps, effectively pivoting from one career to the
next.

VR: THE FUTURE OF SOFT SKILLS TRAINING FOR LEADERS
Communication. Empathy. Self-awareness. Collaboration. Self-motivation. Creativity.
Soft skills are all the rage — and rightly so. In the age of artificial intelligence (AI)
and automation, it has become clear that soft skills are the golden ticket to staying
competitive in the job market. For leaders especially, soft skills are vital for both
individual and organizational success. So, how can leaders develop the soft skills
necessary for effective leadership? Virtual reality (VR) may be one answer.
THE CASE FOR ADOPTING VR IN SOFT SKILLS TRAINING

VR creates a space where leaders can practice common leadership skills, including
giving performance evaluations, delivering bad news and dealing with difficult
employees, among many others, privately and without risk. In this virtual world,
learners can experiment with different approaches to leadership so that they can
lead more effectively in the real one.
In addition to reinforcing leadership skills, VR is especially effective for soft skills

training, as it allows leaders to engage in situations requiring proficiency in skills such
as self-awareness, empathy, communication, cultural awareness and more.
For example, DDI Labs’ “Exclusion Experience” is a VR simulation designed to help

leaders understand what it means to be underrepresented in the workplace. In the
simulation, participants attend a series of meetings led by a diverse group of female
executives. The idea is that leaders (especially white males) participating in the
simulation will better understand what it’s like not to be part of the “in group,” which
will help them become more inclusive, empathic and culturally aware. Ryan Heinl,
director of product management at DDI Labs, notes, “Once you have that awareness,
you’re more apt to take some action.”
For maximum engagement and learner retention, L&D leaders should use creative
simulated environments when using VR for soft skills training. All too often, however,
Heinl says that training professionals end up recreating their own office environment
in the simulation … but the potential of VR extends far beyond what’s familiar.
“You can literally do anything in VR. You can have a meeting at the MIT Lab and talk

about innovation as a team, or you could go basically anywhere. You could go to

the moon and have a conversation about where future resources are going to come
from,” Heinl says.
Being able to transport learners anywhere, anytime, can obviously reduce training
costs, but even more value lies in VR’s ability to effectively engage learners.
Alice Bonasio, immersive tech consultant, speaker and editor-in-chief of Tech Trends,
says, “Travel, accommodation and downtime costs drop whilst learners spend less
but better-focused time training from their location. But I feel, more importantly,
by making training engaging and memorable, VR reduces the time to competency,
which in turns benefits operational performance, improves the workforce’s well-being
and reduces attrition rates.”
Thus, it is clear that VR has the ability to create immersive experiences in which
leaders can develop and practice critical soft skills for success — but that’s not all: VR
can accurately measure leaders’ soft skills and provide them with objective feedback.
“VR creates a space where leaders can practice common leadership skills
privately and without risk.”
Speech technology is one way VR can measure leaders’ soft skills and offer tangible
feedback. Dean Slawson, co-founder and CEO of VRAINIUM, says, “Speech is a big
area where you can do analytics based on what the learner is saying in a scenario or
[how they are] interacting with peers in a distributed training.” Speech analytics can
offer leaders feedback on metrics like how much they talk versus how much they
listen or how often they ask questions (which demonstrates a high level of curiosity)
versus how often they make statements, Slawson explains.
Another way VR give leaders feedback is with eye-tracking technology, which

can determine if you’re looking at the person talking to you, and head-tracking
technology, which can determine if you’re displaying active listening behaviors (e.g.,
nodding).“You can pick up on all of those non-verbal behaviors and give direct
observational feedback, privately, to leaders,” Slawson says.
Ultimately, VR allows leaders to develop, practice and measure their soft skills by
putting them in immersive situations that they may not have otherwise experienced.

Bonasio says, “I see soft skills VR simulations very much as a tool to enhance training
sessions by bringing previously impossible exercises to the classroom and letting
leaders see the incredible potential of VR through practice.”
WHAT L&D LEADERS NEED TO KNOW

From preparing for potential challenges to overcoming initial hesitation,
implementing a VR-based soft skills training program for leaders can seem daunting
for the training professional, but it doesn’t have to be.
L&D leaders should actively plan for potential issues that may arise when using VR
for soft skills training in order to better prepare themselves for its launch. Making the
training content available in a different format (for learners who experience nausea or
otherwise feel uncomfortable during the VR experience) is one way to be proactive
in ensuring all learners are able to participate.
In order to overcome any initial hesitation associated with making the switch to a VR-
based soft skills training program, Slawson encourages training professionals to take
baby steps.
“You don’t have to roll out to your whole enterprise as a first step … If you feel like
you see the advantages there and you want to try it, but you feel some uncertainty,
the best thing is to take a small bite, get some experiences and learn from that — and
then make any adjustments you need to make more broadly,” he shares.
THE FUTURE IS NOW

As more and more organizations come to recognize soft skills as a requirement for
effective leadership, and technological advancement continues to permeate the L&D
field, using VR to develop leaders’ soft skills will soon become commonplace. L&D
leaders can join the movement by using engaging simulations, preparing for potential
pitfalls and taking the initial leap into the world of VR.
“We know that the need for these kinds of skills is only going to be increasing as
technology changes going forward,” Slawson says. “So, if we’re not going to do VR
as a way to adjust the soft skills gap, what are we going to do? If you think of it that
way, it probably is the way forward.”

ADDITIONAL TRAINING INDUSTRY
RESOURCES
SOFT SKILLS AND LEADERSHIP DEVELOPMENT
Soft skills are often a component of leadership training programs. Don’t miss these
research reports from Training Industry, Inc.:
• The State of the Leadership Training Market

Our annual report on the market for leadership training provides an overview of
current training and sourcing practices in companies providing training to their
leaders and managers.
• Leadership Development: The Executive Experience

Leadership development is one of the most critical investment areas in L&D. Such
programs target company leaders, often the most highly visible learners in a
company. Does this mean these programs are of the highest quality? This research
report answers questions and shares insights about the leadership development
programs that serve executives.
• Women’s Access to Leadership Development: A Tale of Two Experiences

The well-known leadership gender gap means that organizations are losing out on
the diverse talent needed for decision-making and successful outcomes. As the
keepers of strategic talent development in their companies, L&D can — and should
— play a key role in eliminating this gap.

Expert Perspectives On Soft Skills 2019

Uploaded by

Document Information

Original Title

Copyright

Available Formats

Share this document

Share or Embed Document

Sharing Options

Did you find this document useful?

Is this content inappropriate?

Copyright:

Available Formats

Expert Perspectives On Soft Skills 2019

Uploaded by

Copyright:

Available Formats

EXPERT PERSPECTIVES ON

CHAPTER 1: WHAT ARE THE SOFT SKILLS?

In Defense of Conversation as a Hard Skill

Not-so-soft Skills: The Language of Creativity, Collaboration and Power

Why Companies Need to Invest in “Commercial People Skills” to Boost

Communicating Through the Cracks

Coaching Time Management: The Underrated Tool for Sales Leaders

Unclogging the Communication Channel

It All Starts With Noticing: Mindfulness and Soft Skills

3 “Soft Skills” that Are Actually Hard Skills

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 2

Can You Teach Motivation?

Empathy in Leadership: Creating a Culture of Understanding

CHAPTER 2: WHY DO SOFT SKILLS MATTER?

Hard Data Makes the Case for Soft Skills

Why We Should Start Calling Soft Skills “Employability Skills”

Playing Hard Ball With Soft Skills

Soft Skills: The Catalyst to Achieving Organization-wide Change

In Sales, Soft Skills Drive Customer Experience

The Softest Skills Can Lead to the Hardest Business Numbers

CHAPTER 3: SOFT SKILLS TRAINING PRACTICES

Go Ahead — Forget Soft Skills

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 3

There Is Nothing “Soft” About Developing Leadership Skills: A Coaching

Curating the Soft Skills: 4 Steps to Get Started

3 Steps in Closing the Behavioral (Soft) Skills Gap

Coaching: Leading, One Person at a Time

5 Reasons to Take a Hands-On Approach to Soft Skills Training

CHAPTER 4: SOFT SKILLS IN A DIGITAL WORLD

Soft Skills Training: Trends in Digital Learning and Emerging Technologies

Are Soft Skills the Key to Future-proofing Your Leadership?

A Survivor’s Guide to Staying Relevant, Even as Technology

VR: The Future of Soft Skills Training for Leaders

109 Additional Training Industry Resources

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 4

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 5

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 6

Sarah Gallo is the associate editor at Training Industry, Inc.

From gaining the deep respect of team members to consistently delivering

Self-awareness is one of the key elements of emotional intelligence (EI), a term

“Self-aware leaders are constantly looking to improve.”

Developing self-awareness as a leader will strengthen not only individual

“We’re committed to becoming excellent because we’re committed to the moral

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 7

CHARACTERISTICS OF SELF-AWARE LEADERS

In addition to being humble, self-aware leaders are constantly looking to improve.

ORGANIZATIONAL BENEFITS OF SELF-AWARE LEADERSHIP

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 8

L&D professionals should encourage leaders to use 360-degree feedback surveys,

In addition to helping leaders develop professionally, self-awareness also helps them

Additionally, a study by Korn Ferry Institute directly connected self-aware leaders to

STRIVING FOR MORE

Customize your free subscription to receive related content.

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 9

How an organization approaches conversation skills can have a significant impact

Here are just a few examples:

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 10

“Ineffective and missing conversations tend to be the root cause of some

COMMUNICATION IS A GENERALLY ACCEPTED BUSINESS-CRITICAL SKILL

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 11

IN A MULTIGENERATIONAL WORKFORCE, FOSTERING A SHARED VOCABULARY

CONVERSATIONS ARE AT THE HEART OF EVERYTHING WE DO

Customize your free subscription to receive related content.

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 2

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 3

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 4

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 5

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 6

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 7

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 8

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 9

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 10

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 11

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 12

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 13

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 14

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 15

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 16

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 17

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 18

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 19

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 20

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 21

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 22

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 23

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 24

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 25

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 26

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 27

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 28

Expert Perspectives on Soft Skills| 2019 29