The Imposter

Syndrome
Toolkit

How to identify imposter syndrome

and practice self-care in times of
anxiety, fear and self-doubt.

therapywithabby.co.uk
What is the definition of
imposter syndrome?
Impostor syndrome is a psychological pattern in
which an individual doubts their accomplishments or
talents and has a persistent internalised fear of being
exposed as a 'fraud'.

Impostor syndrome was first identified in 1978 by

psychologists Pauline Rose Clance and Suzanne
Imes. In their paper, they theorised that sufferers of
imposter syndrome are convinced that their
achievements are due to luck, timing or as a result of
tricking others into thinking they’re better than they
believe themselves to be.

If this resonates with you, you’re in good company.

According to a review article published in the
'International Journal of Behavioural Science', around
70% of us will experience imposter feelings, with
famous faces such as Tina Fey and Tom Hanks
admitting to feeling like a fraud at times.

This toolkit is not intended to replace therapy or medical advice,

instead it offers suggestions to explore.
What are the identifiable
symptoms?
Constant comparison to other people

Feeling inadequate despite demonstrating

competency

Feeling stressed, anxious or depressed

Self-doubt and insecurity

Anxiety of being exposed as a 'fraud'

Being very sensitive to even constructive

criticism

Attributing success to luck

Negative self-talk

Distrust in your own abilities

 How can it manifest?
When we live with the fear that we're going to be exposed as
a fraud, we'll do anything to avoid the shame it makes us
feel. As a result, we often develop coping strategies that fall
into the categories of 'over-functioning' or 'under-functioning'

Over-Functioning:
When we imagine that
everyone else is more
intelligent than us, we can
think we need to work
extra hard to cover up our
perceived incompetence.
This can lead us to do
more than is necessary
and more than is healthy.
Under-Functioning:
If we get overwhelmed by
our fear of failure, we can
become fatigued by
obstacles in front of us.
This can lead to avoiding
and procrastinating and
difficulty taking control of
problems that can and
need to be controlled.

COMMON BEHAVIOURS: COMMON BEHAVIOURS:

Working long hours
Difficulty delegating
Extreme attention to detail
Obsessively checking
emails before hitting 'send'
Over-preparing
Perfectionism
Procrastinating
Missing opportunities
Difficulty asking for help
Avoiding difficult
conversations
Failing to be assertive
Staying under the radar
 What can cause it?
Like most mental health struggles, a variety of factors can
contribute. Family environment and the way our parents
raised us, combined with our personality and our experience
of the world, all shape our belief system and give us a sense
of who we are. Recent studies have also found a racial
component to imposter syndrome, noting that experiences
with racial discrimination and underrepresentation make it
more likely for people to experience imposter syndrome.

The messages we receive in childhood can have a

profound impact on shaping our self-expectation and can
linger for years. You may recognise one (or some) of the
following family related predictors of imposter syndrome:

1. Lack of Approval
Growing up, did you feel like your achievements were never
quite good enough? Or your talents and accomplishments
went unnoticed? This may have made it difficult for you to
feel deserving of your success and own your
accomplishments as an adult.

2. Family Labels
Were the children in your family given labels such as the
‘smart’ one, the ‘sensitive’ one, the 'responsible’ one or the
‘funny’ one? If so, you may have tried to live up to your label,
then felt unsuccessful if your personality or actions deviated
from the family’s expectations.
 3. Over Praise
Were you lavished with praise no matter how well you did?
As enviable as this may sound, if everything you did was
considered remarkable, you may have grown so dependent
on constant validation that if your employers or teachers fail
to continually praise you, then you start to question your
performance.

4. Mixed messages
Did you receive mixed messages about achievement? For
example, your exam results or teachers praise indicated one
thing, but your parents said something different? Perhaps you
achieved a good grade in an exam but your parents asked
why you didn’t get the top grade in the class. When our
success has been inconsistently reinforced, it can become
difficult for us to internalise our success.

If any of this resonates then you should know

that there are many reasons why your parents
didn't give you the approval you needed - none
of which involve a lack of love. Looking back at
our history isn't about blaming anyone, it's about
understanding ourselves better. It provides clues
to how we formed our beliefs so that we can
begin to challenge them.
The Self-Care
for Imposter
Syndrome
Cheat sheet

This toolkit is not intended to replace therapy or medical advice,

instead it offers suggestions to explore.
Types of Self-Care
Physical
Physical self-care is any activity that improves the
well-being of your physical health - from eating well
and moving to staying hydrated and resting.

Emotional
Emotional self-care is about checking in with your
feelings, expressing your emotions, and becoming
more mindful of your triggers and thinking patterns.

Social
Social self-care is about connecting with others. This
type of self-care may look different for introverts
and extroverts, but a connection is essential to us all.

Spiritual
Spiritual self-care doesn’t necessarily have to relate
to religion, although it can for some people. It's about
nourishing your soul and seeking inner peace.
 01 Find Your Workout
We all know that exercise is hugely beneficial to our
mental health but for some people, workouts can
actually trigger or intensify anxiety or feelings of
inadequacy. It can be helpful to let go of all of the
noise telling us which exercise is ‘best’ and instead,
just pay attention to what feels good in your body.
PHYSICAL SELF-CARE

Whether its gentle yoga, swimming, or boxing, there’s

bound to be a form of exercise that’s right for you.

02 Cut the Caffeine

Don’t underestimate the relationship between
caffeine and anxiety. Think of it like this: When we’re
caffeinated, our nervous system is ready for a fight.
Introduce a situation where you feel like an imposter
and you can have a full-on anxiety response. Try
reducing your caffeine in-take gradually and after a
few weeks you may be surprised to see that you feel
less anxious and even your energy levels are stable.

03 Have a Sleep Mantra

The stress of feeling like a fraud can seriously disturb
our sleep. If you're having trouble nodding off it can
be helpful to take the pressure off sleeping and
switch the focus to resting, which can still be deeply
restorative. Let your mantra be ‘Just rest. Sleep will
come.’
 01 Reframe Your Thoughts
When we experience imposter feelings, it can be easy
to fall into a pattern of negative self-talk. When you
catch yourself doing this, try to reframe the thought
and tell yourself a more helpful story. For example, if
your thought is 'Everybody thinks I'm useless at my
EMOTIONAL SELF-CARE

job', try reframing it to 'Just because I feel not good

enough, it doesn't mean I'm right.'

02 Tune into your Body

Becoming aware of our feelings is the first step to
overcoming imposter syndrome but when we're
anxious or depressed it can be difficult to identify the
exact emotion. Observing what is happening to us on
a physical level can give us some clues about how
we're feeling. Anxiety, for example, often shows up as
a buzzing energy in the chest. Sadness can feel like a
heaviness in the heart. Anger can be accompanied
by a tension in the arms, neck, or shoulders.

03 Practice Self-Acceptance
We can often put an enormous pressure on ourselves
to know everything and to be perfect but there are
times when you don’t know the answer and there is
nothing wrong with that. Try to bring some self-
compassion and kindness to your self-talk and tell
yourself the things you might say to good friend who
was struggling.
 01 Share your Experience
Sharing your imposter feelings can have a huge
impact on your mood. Some people benefit from
talking with a therapist, while others may find
comfort in confiding in a close friend or family
member. You may be surprised at how much better
you feel when you realise that you’re not alone in

02
your suffering.
SOCIAL SELF-CARE

Curate your Social Media

Social media is no longer just about keeping up with
our friend’s lives. Today, a few minutes of scrolling can
send us into a negative comparison spiral and
seriously spike our anxiety. Try unfollowing any
accounts that make you dislike yourself and instead,
look for people who are similar to you and people who
inspire you. Following those who actually make us feel
good, rather than depress us, can have a powerful

03
impact on our mood, even after a quick scroll.

The Power of 'No'

We often say yes to things we’d rather not do out of
a desire to please. But saying yes out of guilt and
forcing ourselves to go somewhere or do something
we’d prefer not to is only going to increase our
anxiety levels and therefore increase our imposter
feelings. Practice saying no to people in a kind way
and remember that saying no is a sign of respect for
ourselves - it says, ‘I know my boundaries and I’m
going to stick to them.’
 01 Connect with Nature
Recent research shows that walking in nature can
reduce levels of stress, depression and anxiety. If
you’re feeling stressed and overwhelmed, just 15
minutes of walking can help release endorphins and
instantly trigger positive feelings.

02
SPIRITUAL SELF-CARE

Live in The Moment

Instead of thinking about past failures or what
challenges lay ahead in the future, try to simply enjoy
the moment. Really savour the present time through
all of your senses – touch, hearing, sight, smell and
taste. Or focus on your breathing, in and out. If you
can fill your mind with what’s in the ‘now’, then there’s
no room for worries or concerns about the past or the
future.

03 Journal
Journaling can help us release stuck emotions and
makes sense of our feelings and is an excellent tool
for when we’re feeling overwhelmed. Because
imposter syndrome causes us to feel like a fraud and
constantly compare ourselves to others, we can
easily lose sight of our true needs and desires. When
this happens, the following journal prompt might help
you reconnect to your authentic self: ‘If you knew you
could never fail or be judged and criticised, what
would you do differently in your life?’
therapywithabby.co.uk
@therapywithabby