Goals Guide

GAIN CLARITY. FIND DIRECTION, AND SET

YOURSELF UP FOR SUCCESS
 Terms and Agreement
Terms and Agreement for using anything on this page. By using this material in any capacity (worksheets
and videos), I understand and agree to all the terms and conditions outlined in this document.

Any reference to “I” or “me” in the following document, refers to the person using the material.

Please read carefully.

Disclaimers
I should consult with a relationship professional/ mental health professional in my area to see if this
material is right for me.
I understand this is designed as self-help material and is for informational purposes. This material is
considered a piece of equipment not a psychological service.
I acknowledge no assessment has been conducted, and as such no specific recommendation has
been given that this material is best for my situation. I am choosing to engage in this self-help
material based on my own best judgement. I acknowledge this is not specific advice for me.
I acknowledge that Ember Relationship Psychology, does not and will not have any duty, obligation,
or liability that comes from the provision of, or failure to provide medical/ relationship/
psychological/mental health services.
I understand that if my symptoms are severe or I am experiencing distress I should seek access to a
relationship provider in my area who can offer better assistance. It is my responsibility to access
services that can assess, diagnose and provide treatment recommendations.
I acknowledge that any participation in using the material is voluntary. I understand that if there is a
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 Video 1

Values
Circle 10 items that matter to you. Then rank them in order with 1 being the most important
and 10 being the least important.

____ Relationship ____ Play ____ Safety

____ Friendships ____ Adventure ____ Intellect

____ Love ____ Recognition ____ Wisdom

____ Family ____ Approval ____ Education

____ Quality time ____ Popularity ____ Fairness

____ Success ____ Responsibility ____ Ambition

____ Power ____ Loyalty ____ Compassion

____ Wealth ____ Independence ____ Faith

____ Work ____ Beauty ____ Service

____ Achievement ____ Fashion ____ Giving

____ Free time ____ Fitness ____ Energy

____ Relaxation ____ Health ____ Mental health

____ Rest ____ Spirituality ____ Parenting

____ Peace ____ Stability ____ Financial freedom

____ Freedom ____ Honesty ____ Other: ___________

____ Fun ____ Transparency ____ Other: ___________

@emberrelationshippsychology www.emberrelationshippsychology.com
 Video 1

Relationship Goals
Circle 10 items that matter to you. Then rank them in order with 1 being the most important
and 10 being the least important.

____ Establish bedtime rituals ____ Overcome resentment

____ Establish morning rituals ____ Forgiveness

____ Have regular date nights ____ Gain confidence in our future

____ Try new things together

____ Make time to connect ____ More peace

____ Make time to have sex ____ Role models for our children

____ Give and receive words of ____ Get unstuck

affirmation ____ Gain relationship tools

____ Give and receive gifts ____ Fight fair

____ Share tasks ____ Heal my attachment

____ Establish division of housework ____ Feel safe

____ Hire household help ____ Successfully discuss difficult

____ Share emotional labor issues

____ Improve communication ____ Align our values

____ Feel respected ____ Minimize yelling

____ Conflict resolution ____ Minimize defensiveness

____ Minimize stonewalling ____ Minimize criticism

@emberrelationshippsychology www.emberrelationshippsychology.com
 Video 1

Relationship Goals
Circle 10 items that matter to you. Then rank them in order with 1 being the most important
and 10 being the least important.

____ Understand each other ____ Be able to talk about in-laws

____ Learn to compromise without conflict

____ Create more adventure ____ Agree on time with extended

____ Deepen our friendship family

____ Establish boundaries ____ Plan for retirement

____ Travel together ____ Be able to talk about sex

____ Reignite the spark ____ Get on the same page with habits

____ Restore trust ____ Manage our time better

____ Heal past hurts ____ Increase our quality time

____ Feel seen and heard ____ Manage our work stress together

____ Get on the same page with ____ Support each other's emotional

parenting needs

____ Get strategies for parenting ____ Decrease screen time

____ Get on the same page with ____ Increase healthy choices

financial goals ____ Be active together

____ Save for a shared goal ____ Start a shared hobby

____ Get strategies to talk about money ____ Change decision making

@emberrelationshippsychology www.emberrelationshippsychology.com
 Video 2

Thinking About Goals

These are prompts to help you think about what you want more of in 2022. Dream, explore,
and just see where your mind takes you. In the next video, you will identify your goals. Sleep
on this worksheet before you set your goals, and see if they still matter tomorrow.

What did I learn by exploring my values? What goals, if any, did I become aware of
during that exercise?

What did I learn by exploring the relationship goals worksheet? What goals, if any,
feel like a priority right now?

In 2022, how do I want to feel when I wake up in the morning? What is getting in
the way of me feeling that way?

What areas of my life are causing me the most distress? (e.g. relationship,
parenting, work, friends, finances, fitness, etc. ) How come?

How would I like the area listed above to be different one year from now?

@emberrelationshippsychology www.emberrelationshippsychology.com
 Video 3

2022 Goal Setting

Review your values, your areas of struggle, and your dreams. Here you are going to set some
goals. Think about keeping them SMART.

What one relationship goal would I like to achieve in 2022? How come this matters
to me? How will I feel when I achieve it?

Make the goal SMART.

S
M
A
R
T
For my relationship goal: 1. What do I need to stop to achieve it? 2. What do I need
to start to achieve it? 3. What do I need to find to achieve it?

@emberrelationshippsychology www.emberrelationshippsychology.com
 Video 3

2022 Goal Setting

Review your values, your areas of struggle, and your dreams. Here you are going to set some
goals. Think about keeping them SMART.

What one personal goal would I like to achieve in 2022? How come this matters to
me? How will I feel when I achieve it?

Make the goal SMART.

S
M
A
R
T
For my personal goal: 1. What do I need to stop to achieve it? 2. What do I need to
start to achieve it? 3. What do I need to find to achieve it?

@emberrelationshippsychology www.emberrelationshippsychology.com