A Cat (Tiger) Has 9 Lives or More!

A Cat (Tiger) Has 9 Lives or More!
A CAT (TIGER) HAS 9 LIVES OR MORE! I was born in 1950 a Year of the Metal Tiger. As was my twin, Albert, (obviously), and Victor, our foster brother. A tiger is after all a big cat. There is a maxim or proverb that a cat has 9 lives. I can tell of at least 15 near-death incidents that I have had so far in my life; but I shall only relate 10. This is merely to suggest that a cat (tiger) has more than 9 lives. Do not jump to the conclusion that I will here and now start detailing and narrating these neardeath incidents. No, that would only bore you to tears and make this episode read like a newspaper article. A true memoir is about what one has experienced and in this matter whether one has learned anything from that near-death experience. Obviously if I have had a death experience, I would not be alive to write this account. There are many emotional aspects to each near-death experience, and correspondingly, there are just as many varied spiritual, wisdom and knowledge increments to ones learning curve about the meaning of life. A good starting point in this present discussion is about the inherent fear of death. Invariably, most people that I have discussed or related my near-death incidents to, have asked me whether I was ever scared of dying? This might seem a fairly innocuous question. It is not. That was why, the few times that I have been asked the question, I have chosen to avoid the answer. I simply replied things happened so quickly that there was no time to think of dying or to be afraid of dying. This was only a half-truth. You see, there is a certain tinge of spiritual wisdom or spiritual insight that is inculcated through near-death incidents. Such spiritual experiences are not easily imparted unlike worldly knowledge and wisdom. With the advantage of post near-death incident spiritual wisdom one realises that it would be better not to strike fear into the questioners mind. Why further speculate on what is a natural instinct or intuitiveness to fear death? That fear is embedded in our DNA! How would you explain that whatever the fear, that that morbid fear is irrelevant to whether you should or are going to live or die? You see, whether you had feared death or did not actually fear death immediately before you were on the verge of death or about to die has no impact on the expected or eventual outcome. It is even more difficult to explain how, if you had feared death before the near-death incident, that when you did not die as feared, that somehow your attitude towards or fear of death would be mollified for good. It is impossible to say whether in life, one can or has ever reached the stage where one has overcome the fear of death. This is with the exception of say devout and spiritually emancipated Buddhist or Jesuit monks. It would probably be closer to the truth if one were to say that one has reached the stage of accepting the inevitability and unpredictably of death. This way, at least one leaves the option open to allow for a corresponding wish that one hopes however not to die soon, but that rather one desires or longs to live as long as possible. I think it would be fair to say that, in the normal situation, the birth of a human baby results in blissful joy and happiness to the parents and the other members of the family but the new-born baby him-self will be in tears crying coming into the world. Think? Do baby elephants cry at birth? I remember my early days of studying Zen Buddhism and learning about the Four Noble Truths. The 1st Noble Truth was that Life is Unsatisfactory or that Life is Suffering. Do human babies intuitively cry because they know that life will be about suffering? Mind you I am not delving into some psychological hypothesis. I am just conjecturing. For, that is what near-death incidents do to you. It makes you contemplate and vacillate about the meaning of life, the vagaries of life, the incongruencies of life, and most of all about the inequities of life. When you go to the other end of the spectrum of life or being, you will find that, in the normal situation, when you die, in contrast, your loved ones are the ones wailing and crying their hearts out.
A Cat (Tiger) Has 9 Lives or More!/VC/04/07/11 Page 1 of 13 Vince Cheok
Presumably, in death, however, or on the other hand, one or you, would be in deep repose, in perpetual rest and peace and (hopefully) happy! My birth was not a normal situation. I was born with a hole in the heart. I was a blue baby. The doctor told my mother that I had only a week to live. Thus, this was my 1 st near-death incident. Naturally, my mothers joy was tinged with sadness and dreadful apprehension of my imminent death. You could say that I started life giving my mother heartache and a headache. My mother sought spiritual help from Kwan Yin to spare my life. It appeared that her supplication was answered. As I grew up I realised that there was something medically wrong with me, as I was continually given special Chinese medicinal herbal tonic soups or other health supplements to augment my diet. These Birds Nest Soup; Black Chicken Ginseng Soup and Raw Egg in Horlicks must have added substantially to the weekly grocery bill. There were also these excruciating bitter powdered granules that I had to take regularly. I am sure they were called ngau tam. I think they were bears bladder or scrotum or something! I have no doubt as to the beneficent therapeutic effect on my physical health of these Chinese medicines. I would suggest that any therapeutic benefit from these Chinese medications paled in comparison to the spiritual impact that the motherly thoughtfulness in dispensing therapeutic medicine had on ones forbearance and disposition. Let me put it this way. No matter what you are told about what people might be like being born with inherent or latent personality characteristics, do not accept these assertions as the gospel truth. The usual Hokkien expression in this regard is See Sing Ah Nee or Born Like That. If you hear this, think twice. The truth might in fact be otherwise. To a very large extent we might in fact indoctrinated and moulded by our environment and the manner we were brought up. We might just be the product of our environment! Ponder these. A human being can never really know how to love or what love is unless he or she has been loved. You will never really know how to be caring or how to care for others unless you have been cared for by others, who had cared for you, despite of, or whatever, your physical, medical or other condition is or was. An extrapolation of this flow-on effect in other areas of human behaviour or endeavour can be found in these attributes. You would never truly appreciate what little wealth you might have unless you have experienced poverty. You would never truly appreciate the food that you have available to eat unless you have suffered hunger and famine. You would never really appreciate your parents for what they have done, i.e. how they have had to toil and sweat to bring up the children, until you start having your own children. Of course, other factors come into play. For life is about personal choices. In that sense, a persons personality and his emotional build-up plays an important rule in his decision making. For, it is said, the decision a person makes depends on the type of personality he has. However I will leave that to the psychologists and other experts on human behaviour to comment on. I will only comment on my personality trait later on. First let me divulge a common revelation from my near-death incidents. Surely, you will not disagree when I say that life is about action and interaction. I think you will also not disagree with me when I say that life is about life and death. There is an insight that comes imperceptibly with every near-death incident. That insight is of the fact that life is impermanent. Further, everything that you can think of in this world is impermanent. This includes the mountains, the rivers and the firmaments in the skies. Time and even space are impermanent. So is very cell, every atom and every cosmic string, (if you are into the M Theory). There is an imperturbable notion in your deeper consciousness that whatever gives life might also bring death, or conversely; that whatever brings death also bring life. It is because things are impermanent that we have hope. We have hope because impermanence means things can change. This means that we can also change ourselves and our environment for the better. This means we can change our destiny! Changing
destiny means making decisions, making choices. As I was saying ones personality affects how one makes decisions. I had a stubborn and a sensitive personality, when I was a child. I hated and would not accept any bullying. I was known as the Mad Bull as a child. Whenever I got teased or bullied I would react aggressively and violently. With Zen meditative practice, and old age, I am now a changed character. However I am fully conscious that my hot temper is merely under wraps rather than having been eradicated altogether. I am probably still quietly obstinate and still detest being intimidated. Given my mean streak, growing up physically weak meant that I was envious if not jealous of other boys. Instead of living a sedentary existence as befitted my medical condition I took it upon myself to climb higher than the other boys or run longer and faster than them. This is another possible effect of a near-death incident. You could either mope in despair or depression of your condition or you could rise up to take charge of changing your life. I took it on my chin. I brushed aside any parental directives that physical exertion may cause me to die young given my weak heart condition. I threw away the do not do this restrictions that came with the fear of death. My motto was that if I had to die, let me die living life as a normal child. Near-death incidents can make or break you. You have to learn to simply cope with what had happened as water under the bridge and to get on with life. Do not get bogged down with questions like why me? Why not somebody else? Do not end up like some Vietnam and other war veterans, who cannot cope with near-death incidents and end up with severe psychotic depression or even commit suicide. After any near-death situation, you have to learn to be reticent and rise up like Lazarus and get on with life. It helps, of course, if you have had quite a few near-death incidents. For, you soon develop a sense of dj vu. You get to start thinking que sera sera, that what ever will be, will be. You begin to take life for what it is, each day as it comes, without clinging to the past, as you await the serving that the next day might bring. You soon acquire a sense of equanimity to all things. You focus on the present of your being. You let go of the past. You enjoy the present for whatever experience it provides. You have no apprehension of the future. You go with the flow, the momentum, the inertia of live. You live it and make the best out but you do not possess or claim it in the proprietary sense. You see it as an ephemeral passage through ethereal life. Take my 2nd near-death incident when I was about 3. Due to my 1st Sisters negligence or otherwise, an old style cast iron hot iron with its contents of hot coal came crashing down on me. I could have been smashed to smithereens! I was lucky. The only permanent damage was that I was left disfigured with a burn scar right across my left cheek. Imagine growing up with an ugly facial scar. Luckily I am a male. I admit. The unsightly scar had made me self-conscious, earlier in the piece, when growing up, and being called scar-face. I decided to put a positive spin to my cicatrix. I began to show it off as a badge of battle wounds, professing the scar as evident of dangerous exploits and rough adventures, professing the scar as evident of having no fear for risky ventures and perilous missions. I began to show it as a badge of toughness, that I was a tough guy, not someone to be mucked around with. Somehow it was easier to assert your toughness if you had the obvious scar to demonstrate that you were not a wimp. So, whatever you have, put a positive spin to it! My 3rd near-death incident taught me one of the most important principles in life. Trust nobody! Rugby is one of those glorious manly sports. The teams are like modern day unarmed gladiators doing battle in a sports-field. This 3rd near-death incident happened in a match between my old school Victoria Institution and the Klang High School (or was it Kajang High School?). It was a rainy, wet, windy afternoon and both teams were like water buffalos wallowing in the mud. The
rugby ball was slippery to catch and hold and just as difficult to kick. It was just as difficult trying to run with the ball, on the odd occasions that you had the ball cradled in your arms. As it happened, during the match, I was running towards the elusive, erratic ball and bending down to scoop it up, when an opposition player thought it fit to kick the ball at the same time. What a contretemps? What mistiming or coincidence? In that rugby melee, what made him decide to kick at the very same moment that I was deciding to scoop up the ball? If the kicker had been Maredona, I could have been decapitated! The 1st lesson learned from this near-death incident Do not trust anybody! Whether on the road, in the office or at the Golf Club, do not trust anyone! The 2nd lesson learned from this near-death incident Do not trust anybody! Why? You cannot trust anybody because you cannot even trust yourself. If I could not trust myself to look after myself, how can I trust others to look after me? My 2nd and 3rd near-death incidents were also mentioned in my memoir of Batu Road School II. My 4th near-death incident was mentioned in my memoir in Night Moves and Manoeuvres. That was the car accident late at night near Batu Caves. I was making a U-turn with the car that I was driving when another car driven without any lights by a drunken Indian driver and at high speed crashed into my car and sent it spiralling out of control. I reiterate what I said in relation to the lessons learned in the 3rd near-death incident Do not trust anybody! This 4th near-death incident taught me something further. Be even more careful of others in the dark. Take darkness as in life representing any situation where the facts are not clear or not enough information is available. Imagine it as any situation where you might be kept in the dark and fed bullshit. In such a situation, you would undoubtedly end up as a mushroom. So in darkness trust no one, not even yourself. Do not ever subscribe to any situation where the blind would end up leading the blind. This is particularly relevant when it comes to religion. Do not accept somebodys God because that somebody claims that his God is the true God and that he is in conversation with that God. Every journey begins with a small step. The 1st step to take is simply as follows - being good and do good. Your conscience and your heart will guide you naturally. When you are ready, God, whoever he is, will find you. Do not waste precious time finding God, until you have found yourself. Once you have found yourself, know who you are, the good and the bad, God will find you. Otherwise, it is like you have travelled everywhere and seen all the sights there are to see, but you have never been to yourself. It is no good knowing whether others are sinners or saints, if you do not realise the sinner or saint in you. In this regard, near-death incidents have this habit of leading you to seek yourself. It is a strange, almost funny thing to say, but when you have found yourself, you will realise that you are actually nobody going no where, and that we are an integral part of everything around us, that we are one with the Universe. The 5th, 6th and 7th near-death incidents involved driving accidents with my wife Josephine. I should say these are only some of the near-death driving accidents or incidents that I have been involved in, where she had been a passenger and thus a witness to vouch for the fact of the occurrences. Over the years, since then, she has gone from a passive passenger, (as a submissive young wife), to the situation where she is now virtually the backseat driver. These days she watches the car speedometer like a hawk. She is fed up with having to pay my speeding fines. The change in her attitude towards my driving came after the 7th near-death incident. Accordingly, I shall leapfrog over the 5th and 6th near-death incidents to describe this 7th neardeath incident. We were coming back from a business trip to Kuantan, in the State of Pahang. Somewhere past Maran and before Karak on the way back to Kuala Lumpur, I got impatient and started overtaking any car whenever the opportunity presented itself. I was prompted to do this as it looked like we might not make it in time for a dinner appointment in Kuala Lumpur. I gradually graduated from
overtaking 2-3 cars in each stint to overtaking 5-6 cars in each stint. It was partly the inflated confidence in my driving prowess and partly the devil may care reckless attitude that made me more and more irrational, as the journey progressed. I got to a particular stretch where I was speeding nonchalantly in my Mercedes in the wrong direction, i.e. on the other side of the road! I had just driven past the 9th car and about to overtake the 10th car, in the direction I was travelling. Suddenly, against my desired expectation, around the slight bend came another Mercedes from the other direction. I was in his lane! All things being equal, ceteris paribus, we were about to collide! I barely made it in the seconds flashing before me to overtake the 10th car and cut back into my side of the 2 lane highway. It definitely would have been a very bad fatal head-on collision had that other Mercedes not brake suddenly to give me just enough room to cut in ahead of the 10th car that I was overtaking. The lesson learned from this 7 th near-death incident is obviously never to tempt fate. More importantly, whatever the appointment, whether it is work or social, nothing is so important and critical that you need to rush to meet the deadline or appointment, and to do so at the peril of your own life or that of another. The 5th near-death incident involved Josephine driving my Mercedes. We were on a business trip to Penang. Normally, I would do the driving. This is or was because Josephine is from Hong Kong. Drivers in Hong Kong are not experienced in long distance highway driving. In that particular trip to Penang I was feeling tired after leaving Kuala Lumpur. After the North-South Highway rest-stop before Ipoh, where we had stopped for a smoke and a teh tarik, I asked Josephine to drive until Ipoh, intending it to be good training and experience. I was also comforted by the fact that it was mostly a 3 lane highway all the way in one direction, as we were separated by a very wide road-width median strip from the 3-lane traffic coming down the highway from the opposite direction. Such is life that when things are going to happen, they are going to happen. So, there we were, Josephines 1st time at the wheels on the North-South Highway; in fact, any highway, in that particular trip to Penang. This is the same Josephine that could go in the wrong direction in a Jalan Sehala in downtown Kuala Lumpur. She had barely driven 25 miles out when all of a sudden we were caught in the middle of a snap monsoonal downpour, so heavy that we could hardly see the front of our Mercedes. It was so foggy and hazy in the sheet rain that it was not an option to simply pull over to stop or to change drivers. I calmly told Josephine not to panic. I told her that I have driven in these conditions many times before, which, if you are surprised, was the truth. I told and helped her to put the hazard lights on, to put the high beam headlights on, and most importantly to keep travelling in the middle lane but at no more than at 40-60 kilometres per hour. I could see that Josephine was petrified. I partly grasped her left hand that she had on the steering wheel, with my right hand. This was to comfort her and to calm her nerves. I kept reassuring her that there was nothing to worry. This was even though my heart was starting to beat faster, ever fearful that she might lose her nerves and just start swaddling all over the 3 lanes. I just wanted her to stay in alignment. I trusted my intuition which told me that cars which had the time to stop and pulled over would have already done so and they would be on the lane, left of the middle lane, and closer to the verge. Changing or crossing over to the outer take-over or fast lane, to the right of the middle lane, could be precarious because there could be some drivers tempted to dash through the fog at high speed. Josephine might also end up hitting the inner kerb of that right lane, had we used it, in the fog. Sticking to and continuing to move in the middle lane had its risks to. Anything was possible, but risks wise I had made the decision that this option was the least risky. In the end, I do not think Josephine had to drive more than 10-15 minutes further on, although it did seemed like it were hours. We suddenly drove out of the fog. We were still on the highway and still in the middle lane. I directed Josephine to pull over to the side, and much to her tremendous relief, I then took over the wheel and drove to Ipoh. For her it was her 1st near-death incident and the 1st is the one that you will never forget. It is through such near-death incidents that you start
contemplating about this personam called God, whoever or whatsoever he is or might be. You get the feeling that the fickleness of life is always in Gods hands. The 6th near-death incident happened on the Karak Highway but quite a long way from Karak. Anyone who is has made trips to Genting Highlands, Janda Baik or Bentong will know the mountain pass that takes you across to the border with Pahang State from Selangor State. This hereabout is the start of the Karak highway to Kuantan. Travelling from Kuala Lumpur the stretch before this mountain pass is a long windy climb. Coming back from Genting Highlands, Janda Baik or Bentong, once you pass the mountain pass, it is a long windy brake-pressing downhill toboggan ride. It had been raining when we left Bentong. I had taken Josephine to visit the jungle hideout of my 2nd Brother. His jungle hideout was somewhere in the Pahang jungle, about 50kms from Bentong. I came down the hill as usual past the mountain pass. I must have used this stretch hundreds of times. Down the hill, all of a sudden, my Mercedes started to slide, as if it were on ice. I realised the danger and I was desperate! I stepped on the brakes, harder than I should. I realised there and then that if the brakes locked, it was goodbye! I focused on controlling and manoeuvring the steering. Josephine was screaming Low Kung! Low Kung! [Husband! Husband!]. I had to keep the car on the road. There were on other alternative. For, if we ever left the road we would go over the edge and into the steep ravine below. We were definitely in peril! I do not take any credit for saving our lives that day. That credit is rightfully owed to Mercedes Benz for their fine cars and in particular to the ABS anti-brake locking system. The 6th near-death incident proves one thing. Not all car accidents are due to bad, wilful or reckless driving. I later found out from the motor mechanic when I took my Mercedes in to check on the tyres and the brakes this strange fact. Many of the lorries [trucks] on Malaysian roads are leaking engine oils. This oil leakage gets absorbed into the bitumen. However on rainy days the oil floats up to the surface and then the road gets oil-coated. On steep roads the oil runs down and coats the entire down-slope! It was this oil-coated road surface that caused my Mercedes to slide. The lesson learned here is to have a car with ABS anti-brake locking system and good road-hugging tyres. After the rain, avoid any downhill stretches of highways frequently used by outstation (inter-state) trucks and lorries. My 8th near-death incident took place in exotic Port Moresby in Papua New Guinea. I used to be the Assistant Commissioner (Policy & Legal) of the PNG Internal Revenue Commission. One of my close friends there was a Singaporean Hokkien Chinese called Ritchie and his Singaporean Malay wife named Aimee. I have changed their names slightly to maintain anonymity as one of the parties might still be alive. Ritchie was a nice enough chap and he was my best friend outside work. The main reasons were that he lived nearby my house and that he owned a Chinese seafood restaurant and a Chinese trade-store. I lived on a hill in Port Moresby town and his house was above his trade-store, which was next to the port area, which was adjacent to the town. A PNG trade-store is a bit like what we call a Chiuchow grocer in Malaysia. Basically, I was a bachelor, when I was in PNG, as I was separated from my 1 st wife. Ritchie was therefore almost a nightly dinner companion. Ritchie could be a problem sometimes. He was a very jealous and possessive husband. Ritchie was also an alcoholic when he got depressed. Ritchie could get very violent when he was drunk. Ritchie could also be dangerous when he got drunk because as a successful businessman he was licensed to carry a small hand gun. It was not an old fashion pistol with a revolving barrel that you see in the movies but a modern German luger with an automatic cartridge mechanism. Aimee was a bit of a flirt. She was sultry and seductive like Saloma or Anita Sarawak. Aimee would, whenever she could, sneak out of the house with some of the local ladies to drink at the pub. At the pub you have Australian expatriates out looking for women. I have no doubt that Aimee was a
flirt but I would really doubt whether she would have risked having an affair. She should very well prepare to be killed if she had dared to take the risk in any case. One fateful night at 2am in the morning, I received a telephone call for help from Aimee. She was obviously sobbing and screaming as if she was in great pain and anguish. She said I had to go there immediately as she was in great danger and that Ritchie was drunk and raving mad! Note by, nobody, in their right mind, unless with armed security guards, would go out at night in Port Moresby. It was outright dangerous. A few months earlier, coming back from a Japanese restaurant at Waigani, which is the new town where Parliament and the Government offices and the embassies are located, at about 11pm at night, my car was shot at with bows and arrows, by rascals attempting to rob and hijack me, on the highway just outside the 3rd mile junction, outside Port Moresby town. Going out at 2am in the morning was therefore just madness. Anyway, something deep inside me, probably my conscience, told me that I had to go. Ritchie opened the door for me. I went into the small lounge and I was shocked to see Aimee crouching in a corner in a foetal position and just sobbing and wimping. She had blackened swollen eyes and the parts of her body that were not covered by her dress and long skirt, were noticeably bruised and red. Ritchie and I spoke in Hokkien. I shall not translate directly i.e. not truthfully, as the nights conversation was in colloquial Batu Road type raw Hokkien, and grossly full of expletives and profanities. He greeted me and asked if I would like a beer. I said yes, OK, as long as it was cold. It is very hot at night in PNG. Also I did not think it was polite to refuse him in the tensed situation. Then, as we started drinking, the revelations came and I thus encountered this nightmare of a night that still plays in my mind. Ritchie started telling me about Aimee drinking at the hotel with Australian white men, who were strangers looking for a cheap lay. Ritchie accused Aimee of having sex with these men. He said Aimee was worse than a prostitute, because at least a prostitute got paid. Aimee had given herself for free! Then as he recounted his version of what Aimee did, he would start beating Aimee again. I would then stop him and directed Aimee to go to bed. Ritchie did not permit that and so as a compromise I got him to allow her to cower in the corner of the room furthest way from where Ritchie and I were seated. Ritchie was obviously in an insatiable raving rage. Ritchie kept repeating this process of beating Aimee again whenever he got further enraged on further recounting. Each recurrence, I responded in the same manner to stop the beating from proceeding beyond the 1st couple of blows. He was continuing to drink as well, despite my trying to slow him down, by getting him to smoke more than drink. I was chain smoking as well as I was feeling uncomfortable and nervous being a witness to such senseless violence. I remember the brand of cigarettes well. It was mentholated cigarettes called Alpine. On his part Ritchie was plastering me with more beer. At one stage he asked if I would prefer cognac as he had a few bottles of very exquisite cognac. I said I would only drink cognac if he stuck to beer. So, it got to a stage where he was drinking beer and I was drinking cognac. The cognac made me feel more flushed and at ease or complacent, if not a bit tipsy. I asked Ritchie whether I might have some hot tea or coffee, as I was feeling a bit tipsy. I thought it might be a good excuse to get Ritchie to get Aimee to do this housework that was expected of the wife as the hostess. I thought this might be a good avenue for Aimee to have a break away from the lounge and from us. My plan worked as Aimee was away for quite awhile. She later came back with hot coffee and tinned cakes and biscuits. While having coffee and biscuits I thought the worst might have been over between Ritchie and Aimee and that I could look forward to going home soon.
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Page 7 of 13 Vince Cheok
However I might have thought or spoken too soon. Ritchie started to recount Aimees infidelity again. Then the unexpected happened. Silly or stupid Aimee, under the mistaken or false impression of the security from my presence in their room, decided to deny outright the allegations and charges. Actually, to be fair to her, she was actually directing or confiding her comments directly at or with me. What she told me was that the allegations were all untrue other than the fact that she accompanied the local girls to drink at the pub. In the twinkling of an eye, before you could say stop! Ritchie had already given Aimee a karate kick to the groin and a slap across her face. These sent her flying and sprawling. These were not like the blows I had witnessed earlier to the shoulders and legs. This was Boxing Ring KO stuff! Now, I was the one equally upset and angry! I admonished Ritchie telling him that he was not a human being, that he was a dog. I said that he was treating Aimee worse than a dog! Only dogs behaved the way he was behaving. In the Hokkien culture the expression dog has the connotation that a person was inhuman or uncivilised. This comes about from the perception that dogs would have sex with their own siblings or parents or any dog will do. So you can imagine how deep the thrust of my insult was! Ritchie immediately went for his luger and pointed it at my head. He said words to the effect that Aimee was his wife and how he treated his wife was nobodys business but his. He said that if I were to call him a useless dog once more he would finish me off. I glared at the barrel of the gun and said to Ritchie in Hokkien How can you call me your friend and you point your gun at me? I was outraged! I was damn mad! In quick tirade, and without giving him the opportunity to dispute anything, I shouted and screamed at Ritchie. Go on, shoot! Kill me! But be careful what you would be in your next life? I came to help a friend, because your wife asked me to help. Do you think I have nothing else better to do? I came here to help you guys but you did not give me face! You beat your wife in front of me! Is that giving me face! Would I beat up my wife in front of you? You beat your wife many times earlier tonight, but I kept quiet. Did you think I did not feel shame? You might not feel shame but you caused me to feel shame! You caused me to be embarrassed! I really do not care what you do to your wife behind closed doors! But in front of me you beat her up! Is that not making me lose face? How can you be a human being? Do you know what shame is? You call yourself a top businessman! What sort of businessman are you? If you have a bad worker, you sack the worker; you do not beat him up! So if you think you have a bad wife, just kick her out, you do not have to beat her! You do not have to beat her up like a dog! Open your eyes! Look at your wife! Tell me what you see? Cant you see that you have beaten her up like a dog! Are you a human being? Tell me! Do you know how to be a human being? I do not know how long I blasted Ritchie. I was fuming! I thought to myself, if I have to die tonight, at least I am going out with a judicial blast! Strangely enough, God works in mysterious wondrous ways. The next minute Ritchie himself was sobbing. He must have suddenly seen for himself what an animal he had been to have battered up Aimee like a punching bag. In retrospect that was a close shave with death. I would never ever play the part of a knight in shiny armour ever again. PNG was a different kind of place. It was not a place where the police would attend to a call about domestic violence. Wife beating was an accepted common practice there. PNG was also not a place where you could take someone to hospital in the middle of the night.
My 9th near-death incident was the most memorable and the most spiritual. I have already referred to this heart attack of mine back in 1996 in my memoir Dear Sir Mr Dicom. For the benefit of those who wish to know what a heart attack is like I shall describe the sensations I felt during the ordeal. First some background information. I led a very sedentary life back then. I was Deputy General Manager with JCG Ltd, a subsidiary of Public Bank Malaysia. I was working from 8am in the morning till 10pm, Monday to Friday, half-day Saturday, with only Sunday for a rest day. The main causes of my heart attack were (1) executive stress (2) lack of exercise. Diet was not a factor as in Hong Kong the slogan was work, work, and work rather than eat, eat, eat as in Malaysia. I lived at Taikoo Shing on Hong Kong Island when I worked in Hong Kong. Taikoo Shing is north of the city centre. It is after North Point but before Shaukeiwan. When I boarded the MTR train at Taikoo Shing Station at about 7:30 am, I immediately felt certain stiffness, like a slight cramp in my left shoulder and upper arm. Those of you who play soccer or rugby will know what a cramp feels like in the shin and calf. The feeling I have just referred to is not exactly like a leg cramp, which intensity is localised to a particular stretch of muscle or tendon. The sort of cramp you would feel in your shoulder with a heart attack as it starts to develop is more pervasive. You feel crampish but you cannot twitch on to a specific muscle. The other thing that would help in diagnosis is if you were feeling this shoulder and upper arm cramp, while you were doing a daily routine. So there I was on the train holding the vertical steel rail with my raised left arm. Today for some reason, this simple hold was aching. This daily simple routine felt different. Something was wrong! Now, a crowded MTR train, packed like sardines, was not exactly the place where you could say, excuse me, give me more room or call the doctor. For those of you who have worked or are working in Hong Kong and have caught or catch the morning MTR train to work, you know what I mean about the daily HK zombies with lifeless gazes, ears plugged with electronic devices or simply sleeping i.e. eyes closed and otherwise lost to the world. HK zombies do not smile at strangers. They sort of looked right through the strangers, as if seeing through glass. When a heart attack is 'triggered it develops further at exponential speed. Maybe, this might only be so, if you are still standing up and under stress from a cramped position, like in a train cramped up like sardines. Minutes passed, and before you know it, that slight cramp had developed into a very painful situation. It was a funny sort of pain, which by now had spread from the upper arm/shoulder to the entire chest. It was not like a pain that you felt when you are pinched in your cheek or pain that you felt in your abdominal muscles when you have a tummy ache. By analogy, it was more like when you have a wisdom tooth ache. The intense pain is pervasive to the surrounding area. You would feel the pain in your jaw, your chin and your nape, yet you know the pain is not localised there, but from the wisdom tooth. It is similar with a heart attack. You felt the pervasive pain, as if an elephant was stepping on you, yet it was also like as if the elephant was kicking from within you. It is so hard to describe. Imagine trying to explain the effects of an implosion when the person you are explaining it to only knows about explosions. Luckily the Hong Kong MTR trains are efficient and fast. I was in Central by 8:00am Things then moved rather fast, from the JCG side anyway. Nobody wants to see their boss die. I presume that I must have been a good boss. I had hurried from the MTR Central Station to my office at the Wing On Building nearby. My good friends, Mr Tan, the General Manager, fellow Hokkien from Gombak in Kuala Lumpur and Mr Lee, the Accountant, fellow Hokkien from Taiping, Perak State and Josephine, my HK Chinese secretary, (who years later became my wife), all rushed about to get me to a local GP (medical doctor), in one of the nearby buildings. I was there just after 9:00am. During this stage in the proceedings I had no idea that I was having a heart attack. I just thought of it in sportsmen terms, that it might be a giant cramp! From that
point on, i.e. at that local GP up till when I was eventually hospitalised Mr Tan was with me throughout. I shall be forever grateful to Mr Tan for this favour. It was a long wait, for the doctor did not turn up till almost 10:00am. Then he called the ambulance. The ambulance was caught in a gridlock in the early morning traffic jam. When I was finally conveyed by stretcher into the ambulance vehicle I was already sweating profusely and was placed under oxygen. I lost consciousness after that. Mr Tan told me that the ambulance was caught in another gridlock in a traffic jam on the way to the Sing Poh Lok Private Hospital [French Private Hospital in local nomenclature] in Happy Valley, 2 suburbs away from Central. By the time I was under surgery it was past 12:00 noon. I had a stent put in one of the cardiac arteries. Before I lost consciousness, when I apparently appeared to be in a delirium or coma, I was actually in a very happy state in my inner consciousness. I was completely at peace and at ease. I was absorbed within a meditative state. I would suggest that if they have available a record of my ECG readings when I was unconscious in the ambulance that they would have found a steady constant reading, as if of someone reposed in deep sleep. In my coma, my memories rewound in my mind and mentally I was asported back to my childhood days with my mother and father. The memory cine-reel was mainly that of my mother, as if she was awaiting my return to her. However she did not beckon to me to join her. It was more like she was trying to tell or assure me that she was with me. Strangely, my primary school teacher Mr Dicom was with me looking at my parents. Mr Dicom was just strangely silent even though he was there, in the journey back, in my mind. For a near-death incident there was no thought of death, There was no fear of death. Maybe I did not know or realised that I was having a heart attack. There was no fear, maybe, because my mother was there. It was just like a sense of me being a child and feeling carefree and nonchalant because my mother was present there. I woke up and before I opened my eyes I had an awareness that I was in a very bright place. It was sort of glaring through my closed eye-lids. I thought to myself that I could be in heaven! With some effort I opened my eyes and to my surprise I was staring directly at some bright fluorescent lights in the ceiling above me! Then a Chinese nurse came by and spoke to me in Cantonese Neh ho mah Cheok sung? [How are you Mr Cheok?] Going on my own experience, there should be no fear of death. Going on my own experience, I think that when death comes, the issue of death may not even arise in ones mind. The mind automatically switches to other thoughts. There would be loved ones at the other side preparing the passage for you to cross over or helping you to stay calm and sedated if it turns out that it is not yet time to cross over. From my experience of near-death, there does not appear to be anything in death that is to be dreaded. I have the impression that rather than death, it is or was in fact the embarkation on another journey to another place. It were as if, if you were alive, you were taking up a posting in another country or going overseas to study or migrating to a foreign land. I have had maybe about 17 near-death incidents. I could finish this episode at my 9 th near-death incident to satisfy the saying that A Cat has 9 lives. However the point I am trying to get across is that this cat (tiger), that is me, has had more than 9 lives. I think so far the lessons learned are that you should not fear death, and that you should not be so reckless as to flirt with death, and that death may just be another stage in the journey of life. It means life could be a series of lives. Once you read between the lines what I am trying to get across to you somewhat esoterically you will understand that it is not the mere absolute fact of life and/or death that really matters. You have to put things in relative terms or in perspective. For, life is not life when you are not really living, when you are basically the living dead. Death is not really death when you are being reborn to a better life To some death might be a relief e.g. when you are
suffering in pain and anguish from a serious incurable disease or when you are suffering abject poverty and squalor and total emptiness and purpose in life. There is a Chinese saying which is quite profound Ho maeng mm sai mm kaeng sei. Choei kaeng hai ngai mm sei [If you have a good life do not be afraid to die. Be fearful only that you might forever suffer in a long life]. Josephine and I were in Durban in South Africa. We were staying at the Balmoral Hotel which is just by the seaside esplanade. The Durban beach is one of the best surfing and sandy beaches in the world and certainly one of the best urban beaches. The esplanade has a lot of seaside restaurants and cafes and also fun fairs and hawkers selling native artefacts. The only downside is that South Africa is dangerous because of the high crime rate, due to extreme poverty and high unemployment. What otherwise might be Paradise on Earth is in fact Hell on Earth. As Chinese tourists you get mistaken for Japanese tourists. Either Chinese or Japanese or as tourists, you stand out like dogs balls. Josephine and I went walking around the adjacent shopping arcades next door to the Balmoral Hotel. It was broad daylight. It was about 1pm in the afternoon. As we were strolling up a side road to get to the Esplanade I suddenly had a dagger held against my throat from behind. I was being waylaid by 3 black men! Give me wallet and watch was all that the extortioner said. I turned to look at Josephine. She was already fleeing! Much to the surprise of the black man who thought he was holding her. Bless her soul and her quick Hong Kong reflex, honed by years of growing up in a triad rampant society. Knowing Josephine was safe intuitively bolstered my confidence. Also it was broad daylight and there were local natives present as well. I said OK! I give you watch. The moment he lowered his knife when he saw me going through the motion of lowering my head to remove my watch, I turned to face him, gave him a sharp kungfu shove against his chest, and dashed off to the Esplanade. It all happened so very quickly, the robbers had no time to react. I give you 2 pointers here. Firstly, Zen meditation certainly helps you to stay calm and focused. Zen meditation helps you to keep your mind still. When you are totally focused on the present before you, you see but your mind does not move. There should be no emotion or judgement. There should be no attachment. Whether the object you are observing is fat, thin, ugly or beautiful, dangerous or safe, you see the object for whatever it is, as an object, but there is no attachment. You are in equanimity in your mind and treat all qualities the same or equally even though they are different. When it rains, it rains. When it shines, it shines. However you treat or regard the rain or the sunshine as the same. Whether you are having plain rice porridge or lobster mornay, you enjoy both equally. So whatever the situation of danger, you cannot react properly, unless your mind is calm and focused. You must learn to plainly see the situation for what it is but without any mental emotion to blur your sight. Secondly, here it obviously helped me that I had spent years running with the ball to score a try or touchdown. Note that my suggestion here is to think solely of how to extricate your-self, i.e.to escape from the danger zone. Always learn to run away to fight another day. When I returned to the hotel, I found that Josephine was ensconced in our hotel room and in trepidation as to what could have happened to me. She said she was worried that I might have ended up trying to fight with the robbers knowing my mad bull mentality. I told her how I had managed to escape. I told her to fetch me my huge hardwood walking stick that I had brought all the way from Gabon in West Africa, where we had been staying prior to arriving in South Africa. I went downstairs to the lobby and asked one of the security guards to come with me. The Malaysian owner of the Balmoral Hotel happened to be my boss. The hotel security guard and I then went back to the shopping centre looking for the 3 black men hoping to give them a taste of
their own medicine. Sad to say, I was like a white man in Beijing looking for a Chinese snatch thief in the Chinese crowd. The black Africans all looked the same. I was really peeved off. I hated being bullied or my life threatened when I have done no wrong! That was my 10th near-death incident. Thereby it brings this episode to a close about a cat (tiger) having more than 9 lives. Vince Cheok
Nobody Going Nowhere In this hard world trying to survive All day working hard to stay alive Our past karma we will never know But definitely we reap what we sow So when to you bad things happen Bear with them, it is just retribution If you have a near-death incident Learn from it, raise your intuition 1st thing, death is not something to fear The purpose to life will become clear Once you discern your essential nature In lives past, present and also the future You are nobody going nowhere in essence All is false ego and illusion in the presence For all our lives in this long journey are but a dream Merely karmic consequences re-birthing in a stream Secret to Nivarna is being good and to do good That my very dear friend is the Ultimate Truth Vince Cheok
Plodding On With Life Never agitate, never worry and never fear or fret Take as is the good with the ugly and the bad All lifes ups and downs; for life is somewhat like that Treat all with equanimity the happy and the sad For only thus will your spirituality steeply grow Strengthened by the trials that your journey borne Ultimately victorys loud call cry will then show When you reflect back on what you have known That ones life journey like any river will always be Dependent on its very terrain but still ends in the sea So whatever it be, the obstacle, difficulty or strife The essential tenet to follow is get on with your life For all that you see, hear, feel or think is an illusion Fleeting past memories though seen as the present Just reflect back on similar phenomenon of your youth
You will see the insight basis of this spiritual truth Cling not to impermanent worldly things or your being Live life spiritually to the full, see beyond the seem Vince Cheok

A Cat (Tiger) Has 9 Lives or More!

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A Cat (Tiger) Has 9 Lives or More!

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A Cat (Tiger) Has 9 Lives or More!