NEHS Media Manager Speech

Hello, fellow humans. Just a heads up, this speech was kind of hard to write because I don’t really like
talking about myself. I’m just so humble like that! So please cut me some slack.
Anyway, hello fellow humans, it is I, Ana, the greatest human being to ever live. I will be running for
Media Manager of the NEHS.

Now, while I know that there is no other true choice for you to vote for—I am, of course, your fated
media manager no matter what the nae-sayers grumble on about—it would still be great if you could
shower me with adoration and praise through your votes. I am, after all, objectively and irrevocably
incredible. Voting for me would simply be a confirmation that you are not blind to life’s universal truths:
the sky is up, the earth is down, and I am awesome.

Who, in their right mind, would not vote for someone awesome? I’ll answer that question: nobody. So
really, there is no doubt about it. I am forever destined to be your venerable media manager.

Right! Ok, so according to Google, at this point I’m supposed to talk about the qualifications I have to
offer. I’ve volunteered to work in the IA Imperfect Art of Living instagram, as well as being in the creative
team for last year’s IA Deep Dive project. It would be fair to say I’ve done similar work in the past. But
who cares about all that? The truth of the matter is that I am the greatest. And you should vote for me.

Ahh…okay if I confused anyone I’m sorry. I swear my sense of humor is broken. In all honesty, I really
love the English language, and would likewise love the opportunity to spread our appreciation of it to
others. The way the words feel flowing through your fingers, the way they sound from your mouth as you
rhyme, the way they taste and twist them around. It's beautiful.

I struggled a bit with keeping this love for English alive, as I had to cut it open and take it apart in school,
taking away the magic it used to hold. We slash through it and hang up its bits, wrestling it down to
boring, functional sentences in an essay. I want to help teach people how beautiful English can be, and
remind others who forgot just like I did. I might be messy at times, and I have the memory of a headless
chicken, but I will work hard for you guys to share our values with the world.

Like I mentioned before, I found this speech a bit hard to write. Because it’s not about me, but about all of
you. Your words, your poems and stories and beautiful sentences. Your creativity. I’m just the one who
shares them around. So if you’ll allow me to be your media manager, I would be honored to work for you
all.
But, of course, that is all irrelevant. Let us not forget the most important part of this whole equation: I am
awesome, and I am destined to be your media manager regardless. So vote for me!

Thank you.